#Senior Registrar

[hozukitofu]

kkir fic idea 💡 might write it or someone else can adopt this and run with it

i work at an australian magistrate court as a paralegal and kkir (my ninja dads) remind me of the police prosecution vs defence lawyer negotiation throwdowns. kakashi is literally all the weird and eccentric lawyer i've ever met (you need to be weird to be sane) and iruka just acts like all the other very nice but firm prosecutors at court to me

imagine hotshot perpetually late but so so brilliant defence barrister kakashi (mr hatake) negotiating a better outcome for his clients. he's always laid back because he knows he's that good, dresses in the same suit every time, gets away with wearing a facemask in court and literally only ever fixes his terrible posture at the bar table and whilst in court. he tried to ask the magistrate to let him salute the coat of arms (instead of bowing like everyone else) when he first got transferred down to the lowly magistrates' court but got promptly shot down (the compromise was the mask). he was working as a top queen's counsel for the private city law firm then got mysteriously transferred to their regional branch in a 'mentoring role' (a bunch of graduated law students interning actually quit their postgrad studies because he was really harsh and had really arbitrary rules tbh). so my man's in a bad mood ALL THE TIME (literally unprovoked) and has no personal assigned paralegals because no one can stand him. his assigned clerk has the patience of a saint and the tolerance for no bullshit (it's rin) he makes outrageous plea offers with prosecution and it's the best/worst time down at court. he also cross examines like the person at the mic personally wronged him, which isn't great if it is a protected person in a family violence case, or any witness at all, but very eye opening to see

down at court you have the sweetest man ever sergeant umino ('please call me iruka') in the dog box(what we call the prosecution office). he has a law degree (admittedly from a nowhere regional university but he is admitted to practice as a legal practitioner) and way too overqualified for the police force, but he wants to make a difference before going to teach full time or practising law full time. he's nice about everything (printers, legal advice, referrals, talking to anyone) except for paperwork which he is anal about. he wields stamps like weapons and every time an informant is shown to have filled out their paperwork wrong he calls them up directly (how does he even have their direct line?) to chew them out, but super nicely. adjournments, unmentionable dates, requests - don't need to provide reasons, iruka will approve. he not-so-secretly made copies of his police badge so paralegals can print documents off the police printers. he always gets snacks and coffees for court registrars and referral officers. he has bags of lollies for little kids. iruka teaches community service and justice studies for the vocational college nearby. he also has the occasional stint as a university lecturer only for first year law kiddies, and teaches also senior high school legal studies electives. beyond stamps and paperwork, he is the law down to the letter, sometimes to the spirit. if the facts look bad, especially if it is family violence or egregious failure to appear/warrants then he would be a hardass to lawyers. my man however is not opposed to diversion especially if the accused are kids.

so like fanon, kakashi brings outrageous plea offers to the dog box whenever iruka is in -- 'can you withdraw [most serious charge]' 'you can't prove that she was fearing for her life' 'he's never had a criminal record so can't you give him a slap on the wrist and send him a bond?' iruka shuts that shit down every time. he has a case of bleeding heart-itis so occasionally they CAN collaborate to help truly at risk offenders to reorient their lives. kakashi complains that iruka agreeing without a yelling match feels worthless but deep down he doesn't mind when iruka isn't in full hate mode AT him. kakashi thought that iruka would be all snobbish because police prosecutors who hold law degrees tend to act like they're better than everyone else but iruka is overall down-to-earth, hi-i'm-here-to-help. can't push him around though, but he's all about the learning experience so he encourages postgrad law kids and volunteers to have a go at him. for the real thing, defence lawyers groan good-naturedly when they hear he's in the dog box. kakashi seems to be the only who delights in riling him up, but in the rare instance that everyone agrees BUT the magistrate says otherwise and hands down a harsher sentence, he would be handing up paperwork for a contest hearing SO FAST kakashi wouldn't have time to consult with the client. there's a deal between him and kakashi for a stack of signs form 11As can be dealt out when absolutely needed. despite going at each other's throats on the clock, sooo many people have seen them getting lunch together or just talking about their mutual student naruto.

in this universe naruto did not complete high school, went through to vocational studies, took a pathway to uni instead. somehow he, sakura and sasuke end up at the same law firm (naruto is a bit older than the other two but acts precisely like a teenage eshay ALL THE TIME). why does he want to practise criminal law? because it looks cool and he wants to make the bar. his mum is a judge and his dad is a speaker of the senate/cabinet member so... it runs in the family. sasuke is following alongside the traditional asian career choice: doctor, lawyer or engineer. my man hates maths with a passion so lawyer it is. i know it's weird that sakura would be doing a law degree knowing she could be doing a med degree but hear me out: i met and know and am friends with girls who studied double degree law/biomed, finish their law degree, said fuck it I'll be a lawyer what's so bad, otherwise i can come back, and now making big massive bucks. though i imagine sakura will specialise in personal injury cases as well as mental health tribunals, then might go back to university for her med degree. she will be that cousin who lived 6 lives already - was a doctor and a lawyer and your mother would not stop comparing you to her. she needs a bit of instinct training but her academics are spotless. sasuke is ruthless but can't connect with clients. naruto maybe brash and loud but he plays on people's heartstrings like a conductor when presenting a bail app or plea. everything is the way it is so that iruka can move naruto's admission to become a lawyer when he applies for admission at the supreme court

anyways iruka will retire from police work to teach full time, maybe sign on to work for a community legal centre to appear for bail apps for remanded offenders picked up in the cells. he accidentally yelled at kakashi one day to go out and kakashi thought it was too funny to not go along with. now they raise 8 dogs, 3 full grown adults and all of iruka's students together. they fight about everything, but might slip into really formal legalese (passover aggressive fuck-you) when they're being annoying or really pissed off. naruto sometimes has to adjudicate these fights and he can't stop being scared for his LIFE.

kakashi: your honour, my learned colleague here had erred in his submission that i had, conclusively, not promised such things

iruka immediately pulling out receipts: your honour, may i submit evidence contradicting otherwise

(they were fighting about whose turn it is to do the dishes. there were only oral agreements in place but once you're both lawyers you just get used to writing everything down and signing to bring up in an argument later)

(iruka also cross examines kakashi for funsies, but they mainly shelf this for when arguments are bad and they need to pull out the big guns)

anyways if anyone ends up writing this please tag me

#naruto #naruto shippuden #kakashi hatake #iruka umino #lawyers AU #fic idea #lawyers AND police prosecutor AU #kakairu #kkir #kkiru #pulled from multiple real life sources #naruto uzumaki #sasuke uchiha #team 7 #sakura haruno #genin as grad law students

[jomiddlemarch]

Declare the past, diagnose the present, foretell the future

Taking in-house on-call at St. Mungo’s on Imbolc wasn’t the absolute worst, as far as Hermione was concerned. It wasn’t a major holiday and the Scottish weather, an unfathomably vile mix of sleet and snow accompanied by icy gales that defied any warming charm, lent itself to staying in. As her social life was not exactly riotous post-break-up with Ron, however amicably resigned and rueful they’d both been about it, staying in at St. Mungo’s, with its endless supply of ginger biscuits and at least one interesting patient per ward, was tolerable. Acceptable.

It could have been, anyway.

“You like being on-call, Granger?” 

That was Draco Malfoy, her fellow senior registrar, academic rival, and star of far too many risqué dreams she continued to blame on eating cheese late at night. He’d grown significantly after the final battle, which she refused to capitalize when she thought of it, just as she refused to refer to Voldemort as anything other than Tom Riddle. Draco, no longer beholden to a genocidal sorcerer who had far too close a relationship with his voracious familiar and thus no longer suffering from an untreated ulcer along as well as the fear of watching his mother being tortured in her own sitting room, had put on a good 2-plus stone of muscle along with several more inches and somehow managed to make the lime-green robes St. Mungo’s insisted on look like something that would get an approving nod during Fashion Week in Milan. It should be a fourth Unforgivable that someone so silvery blond didn’t look anemic, bilious, or curdled in the next hue over from chartreuse. He looked edible. 

Delicious.

Hermione looked like a generous dollop of the Seafoam Salad her American Cousin Luella brought to every summer tea-party Hermione’s mother had ever thrown, despite being told she was such a dear but she needn’t. Hermione tried to take comfort in the many extendable pockets she’d been able to spell into her robe’s inner lining, but nothing could fully offset the color. 

At the moment, Draco had opened his robes and put his feet up on the coffee-table in the staff break-room, his collar unbuttoned, his tie loosened. He’d stopped using whatever charm or enchanted pomade he’d relied on when they were at Hogwarts and his hair looked silky, a lock threatening to fall across his forehead. If they were called to an emergency, he’d probably cast a wandless Reparo vestis and immediately look the part of a Pureblood senior registrar, but in the meantime, he was…louche. Unconscionably, unbearably erotic.

Hermione thought back to the tea she’d hurried through before heading to Dangerous Dai at a brisk clip. She’d had nary a bite of Brie. Or Cheddar. 

She had no plausible deniability.

Still, he was helping a bit with the judgy curl to his lips and that gleam in his grey eyes which was somewhere between curious and condescending. She’d lean into the condescending part.

“I don’t mind it. It’s part of the work, being a Healer. If you have a true vocation, you don’t resent being on-call,” she said.

She sounded like an impossible prig even to herself but needs must.

“Bollocks,” he retorted, but not meanly. “Don’t you miss your cat?”

“Crookshanks is part-Kneazle,” she said.

“Fine, your part-Kneazle,” Draco said. “Wouldn’t you rather be home with him, doing whatever it is you do away from here?”

“Are you fishing for details or trying to mock me? You’ll have to decide,” Hermione said.

“I’m trying to say it’s just the two of us here, you don’t have to pretend you love being stuck at St. Mungo’s overnight,” Draco said. 

It occurred to Hermione that if she suffered a cardiac event in the next three seconds, Draco would be the one to resuscitate her and that no one ever looked their best post-resuscitation, even when magic was the primary intervention. Vanity, that’s what would keep her from having a heart attack.

Just the two of us.

For Sweet Circe’s fucking sweet sake.

Draco gave her a searching look because the pause had lengthened notably. Anyone else would have said something like Earth to Hermione, except they’d have to be Muggleborn to say that, because Wizards still didn’t grasp that Muggles had been to the Moon and sent rovers to Mars. They didn’t grasp a dog had been sent into space.

“It’s all right. I don’t actually mind it all that much myself, if I’m being honest. And before you feel compelled to point it out, yes, I am Slytherin but I am capable of candor, especially when it suits my needs,” he said.

“It suits you to be honest with me?” she said.

“We’re a team, aren’t we?” he said and she nodded before she could stop herself and ask what exactly he meant, she’d happily taken four feet of parchment on the topic. “Lying, keeping things from each other, it won’t help us. I know you don’t trust me—”

“I—” she interrupted, breaking off when she realized she wasn’t sure she wanted to say she did trust him or that she wanted to, very badly.

“I know we agreed to a fresh slate when we started training here and I also know if was too much to ask of you,” he said. 

“I don’t understand,” she said.

“Yes, I was under duress. Yes, I was seventeen. Yes, we’re all allowed to make mistakes. But I still have a brand on my arm from a group that wanted you dead and defiled and the best I did on your behalf was to pretend I didn’t know you for a few minutes,” he said. 

“What else could you have done?” Hermione said, shrugging. 

“I could have risked my life. I could have died,” he said. “Potter did, when he saved me from Fiendfyre—”

“I’m not nearly as nice as Harry,” Hermione said.

Draco laughed, rubbed the bridge of his nose.

“You’re a better person than I am and you don’t have to argue with me about it. Some things are simply true. I’d like you to trust me, that’s what I’m saying, albeit terribly clumsily,” he replied.

“Albeit?” she repeated. Using humor to deflect was a time-honored tradition and she didn’t know what to do with her sizable attraction when it was suddenly not only about his broad shoulders and narrow hips, the feline grace of his gait, the North Sea of his eyes and his impossibly deft hands (Nimue help her, Draco’s hands…) but also his mind, his insight. She’d known he was clever, her equal in most fields, slightly ahead of her in Charms (though behind in Arithmancy) but she hadn’t appreciated how thoughtful he was or had become. How he could be gentle. 

“I use overly formal language when I feel out of my depth,” he said. Admitted. 

“You were totally at ease then, when Crispin Fillament was hemorrhaging? All I heard was good old Anglo-Saxon obscenities from you while you were trying to shove the blood back into his aorta,” Hermione said, grinning.

“That bugger. He wasn’t helping at all, and I don’t mean his choice to sing operettas,” Draco said. “It was like his blood didn’t even want back in. It felt oddly sentient—”

“Operetta can be polarizing,” Hermione said. They were having an absolutely insane conversation, Thickey Ward caliber, and she was more relaxed than she’d ever been around him while also being turned on. Draco’s expression shifted from entertained to speculative. Assessing. She resisted the impulse to touch her hair or fiddle with the collar of her robes, glad she’d kept her shoes on, regretting her laundry day choice of striped tights.

“We’ve worked together for nearly seven years and you still don’t trust me,” he said. 

“I don’t suspect you of, well, anything in particular,” she replied. It seemed a weak response, even to her. It might not even be fair, but she couldn’t necessarily feel her way into being fair to him. Even if there were times when she wanted to.

“I know. It’s good of you,” he said. “It just, it’s not enough.”

“It’s not enough? You dare to demand I—”

“I’m not demanding anything, Hermione,” he interrupted. “I don’t expect more. I don’t deserve more. I only want more.”

“You want more,” she repeated. She sounded somewhere between incredulous and stupid. As he’d spent a significant amount of his youth the Crabbe and Goyle, the stupidity shouldn’t bother him as it did her.

“I believe Weasley liked to refer to me as a greedy git. I don’t pretend to have entirely outgrown that,” he said.

“That was because you hogged the pudding,” Hermione said.

“Well, I’ve outgrown that. Though I do still like sweet things,” he said. He tilted his head to one side and should have resembled an owl but of course, he didn’t. If anything, he looked like a fallen angel, though he probably wouldn’t have recognized Lucifer if she’d mentioned the name. The Bible was given short-shrift in the Muggle culture studies required at St. Mungo’s where they ran more to Pasteur, Salk and gene-sequencing. “If I want more, I must give more.”

“Is this some sort of rudimentary physics equation?” Hermione said. “You do know Newton covered this area already.”

“I mean, if I want you to trust me, I need to give you more reason. I need to share more, so you feel I’ve earned it. That it’s, I’m worth it,” he said, nodding as he spoke. Hermione felt herself flush and wanted to argue but she couldn’t think of anything compelling to refute his assertion.

“Shall I tell you why I became a Healer?” Draco said.

“If you like,” Hermione replied diffidently, as if she hadn’t wondered nearly every time she saw him and had frankly obsessed over it for the first six months of their training. Obsessed as in Ginny staged an intervention with Padma and Susan and Gabrielle on the Floo, with Luna playing mother over the teapot joining in the chorus that maybe Hermione needed to let it go or go ahead and jump Draco’s bones. She had been so far gone Luna Lovegood had told her she needed to get some perspective (which she suggested would be helped along with a tincture of canawaddle blossom and raging iron jaguar tears. Hermione had just taken the full glass of Shiraz Padma offered and nodded.)

“Because of my parents,” he said. It had been his idea to discuss his reasons but he seemed uncertain how he’d explain or uneasy about her response.

“It was their idea?” Hermione hazarded a guess. It wasn’t a good guess and she’d be shocked if she were right but it was within the realm of possibility in a world where there were both cellphones and wands threaded with a phoenix’s fiery tail-feather.

“Fuck no,” he said, almost choking on a laugh. A bitter one.

“It might’ve been,” she retorted. 

“Only you would believe that possible and before you get horribly offended and flounce off, I mean only you could believe them capable of such humanity. That they would care about other people, that they would care that I did something worthwhile with my time,” he said. He made a calming gesture with his hand, the one he wore a signet ring on. It wasn’t the Malfoy signet though. “You also forget they are the most terrible snobs and think any kind of work is beneath a Malfoy or the bloody scion of the Most Noble House of Black. My mother thinks I’m overly sentimental and my father thinks the whole thing is crass and degrading.”

“I don’t flounce,” Hermione said because what he’d said was a lot to unpack and she couldn’t risk him thinking flouncing was within her repertoire.

“I stand corrected,” he said.

“Why did you become a Healer? How were your parents involved?” she asked. 

“They ruined so many lives. My father, I’ve never asked, I’ve never wanted to know, but I think he’s a murderer and my mother went along with it all. Whatever she told herself about how she had to put me first, it was all an excuse,” he said, holding her gaze the whole time. “Other families left Britain. Other families refused to take a side. Millie’s parents sent her younger brothers to Ilvermorny. Zabini’s mother cast some spell on Blaise that kept Voldemort from touching him, something Darker than Dark, she called in favors all over Europe and West Africa. My parents ruined my life. This is the best way I could think of to make something of it all.”

“That’s, I don’t even know what to say, Draco,” Hermione replied.

“You don’t have to have something to say. It’s just how it is,” he said.

“Is it enough? Atonement?” Hermione asked.

“Mostly. And I like the craft. Snape played favorites and he gave me extra lessons, tradework secrets. The man was frankly a bloody genius. Sectumsempra was his juvenilia. I’m good at Potions and I was taught by one of the best Potions Masters in the past three hundred years,” Draco said.

“It’s nice to hear you admit it,” Hermione said. 

“The special treatment or Snape’s brilliance?”

“Yes,” Hermione said, making Draco smile.

“I wished I could have saved him,” Draco said. “Though I don’t know what surviving would have meant for him. He was broken.”

“He wanted us to let him go. After he gave Harry the memory, he didn’t want to have to live anymore. I tried to stay. Harry and Ron didn’t see his eyes, but he looked at me and I knew it,” Hermione said.

“He doesn’t haunt me. In case you’re wondering,” Draco said. “His portrait often has a choice remark for me, but that’s all.”

“I became a Healer because of my parents too,” Hermione said.

“Yeah?”

“When it was getting close, that last year, you know, none of the adults made any plans to keep my parents safe. They told me not to worry mostly. All Dumbledore cared about was Harry and the Elder wand. Tonks, she was your cousin, she was the only one who said I should look out for my own people,” Hermione said. Tonks’s hair had been a rich chestnut streaked with white when she’d said it, her eyes the glittering green Hermione had always wished to see in the mirror, and she hadn’t minced words. She’d been as serious as Hermione had ever seen her, serious as death, and then it wasn’t spoken of again. Hermione had hoped there would be a time to tell Tonks, to thank her. “I Obliviated my parents and relocated them to Australia, I gave them new identities. I erased myself from their minds. Entirely.”

“What?” To his credit, Draco looked 90% stunned and 10% impressed. Harry had looked 100% horrified and Ron had physically recoiled when she told them. 

“I did some research, figured out how to Obliviate them in the way that would keep them safest,” she said. “Voldemort wasn’t going to care about two random Muggles named Wilkins in bloody Melbourne. Other than you, your father and Snape, none of the Death-eaters were smart enough to figure it out and it turned out Snape was a double-agent, so my odds were even better than I’d counted on.”

“That’s advanced charmwork,” Draco said. “That kind of Obliviation.”

“I had to use Arithmancy too. And runes,” Hermione said. “It had to work. I couldn’t ruin their lives. I couldn’t be the reason they were killed.”

“It worked,” he said. “You saved them.”

“Yes. But it was harder to reverse than I’d hoped,” she said. She said hoped but she meant thought, planned, expected. She’d been wrong. “And when they remembered, they remembered I never asked their permission.”

“You didn’t?”

“They’d never have agreed. I cast the spell behind their backs. An assassination, my mother called it,” she said. She hadn’t told them about being tortured; they couldn’t understand Cruciatus the way anyone magical would and she didn’t want them to ask why she hadn’t confided more in them. Didn’t want them to feel guilty or worse, to accuse her of trying to make them feel guilty to justify her actions.

“You saved their lives,” Draco repeated. 

“That’s what I tell myself,” she replied.

“Do you plan to specialize in memory curses? Because of your parents?” he asked.

“No. It’s not that. I became a Healer because they can understand it. They are dentists, Muggle Healer for teeth, and I was able to preserve all of that when I Obliviated them. They would have said, once, I should take up whatever career I felt called to, but they value healing. It’s something we can talk about. Without much…rancor. They see what we do as another science, this training similar enough, the way the American medical system is similar to the British one,” she said.

“Do you even want to be a Healer?” Draco said.

“It’s fine. Maybe I would have ended up here anyway. You have to master a lot of different magical disciplines and there’s some research to be done. There’s always other people around and you can get a decent cuppa in the canteen,” she said, shrugging. “The robes don’t suit me, but that’s a small price to pay.”

“You wanted something else though,” he said. “You don’t have to lie to me. I won’t try to convince you to leave St. Mungo’s.”

“There’s a course on ancient magics in Alexandria. And the Wizarding Library there, they do archival work and Anatomia liborum,” she said. “I read about it when I was researching the Horcruxes. It sounded intriguing.”

“What else?” he prompted.

“In Japan, at Mahoutokoro, there a witch studying arithmancy and algorithm engineering. That’s a Muggle science, it has to do with computers and programming, which you probably have no idea about, but it’s cutting edge work,” Hermione said.

“Instead you’re here,” he said.

“It’s not so bad,” Hermione said. It was easy to say, because she’d said it to herself about a thousand times. “I’m learning a lot and it’s important, to be able to heal people, and sometimes what’s wrong with them seems impossible, but in an absurdly funny way. My parents like it, when I tell them about work, even if I have to tone it down so they believe me.”

“Doesn’t seem like enough. Not for you,” he said.

“You’re here,” she replied, before she thought better of it.

For a moment, Draco was so still she wondered if she’d cast a wandless Petrificus totalis without consciously registering it.

“It’s not what you think,” she said.

“What do I think, Hermione?” he asked. He didn’t sound sly or arch, not remotely mocking, though he could have and she wouldn’t have been able to blame him. He sounded serious, as if she was the final arbiter of his fate, the Chief Witch of the Wizengamot pronouncing his sentence.

“It wasn’t a grand declaration,” she said.

“I didn’t think ‘you’re here’ was a grand declaration,” he replied. He’d relaxed a bit. Bully for him. Hermione felt like she might spontaneously combust, which coupled with the lime-green robes, was certain to be unattractive.

“You’re clever and well-read and you don’t cave when I argue with you but you don’t try to squash me either,” she said. “You think of things quite differently than I do, but in a good way. You’re my peer, intellectually.”

“I’m your peer, intellectually. That’s what you meant,” he said.

“You spent your formative years with Crabbe and Goyle. It’s not nothing,” she retorted.

“I played chess with Blaise Zabini for seven years. Theo Nott taught me Sanskrit and Pazu Veda in his spare time,” he replied. It felt like an obscure jab at Harry and Ron, neither of whom would claim to be excellent student, but who each had their strengths. They were, perhaps, not ones that lent themselves to spirited discussions, especially since Hermione had an admittedly limited grasp of chess and no real motivation to learn it. She wouldn’t risk the conversation devolving into a cranky argument, relitigating their school-days.

“Theo Nott was fluent in Pazu Veda?” 

“They don’t teach necromancy at Hogwarts, so I can’t vouch for his fluency, but he could read it and translate,” Draco said. He crossed his legs at the ankle, a gesture of pure insouciance. His grey eyes studied her and she lifted her chin. “You’re stalling.”

“I’m not,” she said. For possibly the first time she could remember, she wished to be paged to the receiving area to attend to a disgustingly feculent and smoking heap of Wizard burping up turds, suffering from an unknown but obviously not life-threatening curse or potion. 

“If you don’t want to talk about it anymore, we won’t. I wanted you to trust me and that won’t happen if you feel like I’m grilling you or prying. I’ll try to keep doing whatever it is that makes me being here make St. Mungo’s worth it to you,” he said.

He was a Slytherin but he’d spoken as directly as an Gryffindor, as thoughtfully as any Ravenclaw, as kindly as any Hufflepuff.

“I like you,” she said. 

She was not going to mention lust, her own for his face, his shoulders and his hands, the nape of his neck, the line of his thigh when he crouched down to talk to some patient on the Thickey Ward who thought they were a mole. His lips when he smiled. His eyes when he had a new idea that she was going to hate at first. She was courageous, not foolhardy.

“I like you too. Very much,” he said. “Exceedingly. I don’t want you to worry, having said it first, that your feelings are unrequited. They are very, very requited. Maximally requited.”

“I only said I like you,” she replied.

“I know. You don’t make grand declarations. I do. When they are called for,” he said.

“And it’s called for now?”

“We’ve worked together for seven years. We’ve known each other since we were eleven. You just admitted you like me. I’m not risking waiting another decade for you to understand how I feel about you,” he said. “Wizards have long lives but I’d hate to have this conversation with a white beard down to my navel.”

“You will never have a white beard down to your navel. You’d never do something so cliché,” Hermione said.

“You’re probably right. But I still prefer telling you tonight,” he said. “It means that when I ask you if you’d like a cup of tea and a biscuit in the canteen, you’ll know I don’t just mean a cup of tea and a biscuit.”

“But we’d still have those, right?” Hermione said. “Because I skipped lunch today.”

“I will buy you every biscuit in the canteen,” he said. “And breakfast tomorrow morning. Somewhere where you can get a decent omelet.”

“So, someplace Muggle,” Hermione said. 

“Most assuredly so. At least until we both have a weekend off,” he said.

“Then what?”

“Then I take you to Paris.”

*

Five hexes, three Dark-adjacent curses, nine (nine!) misbrewed Potions causing inflammation, exudation, and one case of rapid-fire recitation in Norn, an unlicensed researcher’s run-in with a surly matagot, and a family suffering from mazy measles, meant that no biscuits, chocolate, ginger or lemon, were consumed and the tea in the canteen’s urn remained untasted by either of them.

They did, however, make quick work of a passable cheese omelet at a very nice café once they’d given sign-out to the day’s team.

And Draco Side-alonged her home, giving her a kiss on the cheek at the door.

Hermione kissed him back. Not on the cheek. 

She wasn’t about to wait for Paris for a French kiss, not when they had so little say over the on-call schedule.

Not when he looked at her with those sleepy grey eyes.

Not when he murmured her name against her lips.

#dramione #st. mungo's au #epilogue what epilogue #hermione x draco #hermione POV #draco malfoy #healer!draco #healer!hermione #family drama #angst #trauma #humor #starts rom-com and then you know #draco creates his own redemption arc #malfoy family #granger family #slytherin and gryffindor friends #enemies to colleagues to lovers #romance #hp fandom #severus snape

[beingdreeyore]

We had an incident at work today. So much drama. It's been the longest day. People died.

It's funny though. I see myself as a difficult person. A hard person. Abrasive. Difficult to get to know. Difficult to keep. My standards drive everyone away. Well, except the men I'm dating who refuse to meet those standards. Those men I keep around because apparently collecting red flags is a hobby of mine...

But when shit goes down, I know I'm a good person to have. I'm loyal. I'm good in a crisis. I care about what's right. I will wage war against those who have done wrong. I never learned how to sit by when I see things occurring that I think aren't just.

So I don't get why, when someone working their second day as a psychiatry registrar was irreversibly traumatised, when I told them to go home and I'd cover them and their patient load, people said kind things about me.

Helping others in crisis should be the bare minimum. The very bare fucking minimum that we can do for each other. And yet when I called him to ask if anyone had offered to take the on-call shift he would have to do once his normal day ended, he sounded surprised. Like why would anyone?

When I said to him "it's not okay this is happening to you" he got emotional. Because management hadn't checked in. His consultant hadn't checked in. He thought, on day two, that he was already failing because something that no human should ever have to experience had left him vulnerable. And surely if this went beyond the normal experience in the role someone would check in. Right? RIGHT?!

So I got angry, in that arrogant way that I do, and told him that me working his shift this evening wasn't up for discussion and that if management had a problem with that he was to tell them to call me directly.

I burn bridges. I know that. I know better. But I do it. Because the hospital system is brutal and broken. Because it's not okay to let other humans suffer like that.

The thing though, is that when other registrars messaged me about it, presumably because he'd told them, I didn't reply. I don't want compliments on how "kind" or "sweet" I am. What I want is for all of us to do better. To be better. To demand better. Why did I have to be the one saying he was in no state to work tonight? Where was management when I was having that discussion with him? Some of the members of management are doctors. Fucking career psychiatrists. Where were they when he was being interviewed by the police or talking to patient families on day two in psychiatry and without a senior in the room?

I'm so angry. I'm angry at the system that is broken. I'm angry at the consultant who refused to support his registrar. I'm angry at the management team that refused to do anything that might equate to work. And I'm angry that any human should have to experience what that registrar did without a support network to catch them.

Adding 5.5 hours to my day so that he isn't traumatised for life isn't an act of kindness. It's the bare minimum. And it should be the expectation. This is fucking psychiatry for god's sake. If we refuse to protect each other from severe emotional trauma then what the fuck are we doing here and how can we expect other disciplines to do better???

#psychiatry #s rants #medblr #medicine #mental health #pgy4 #do better #be better

[toomanyrobins2]

The October Letters

Summary: An orphan all her life, Y/N is simply too old to remain at The Bowery Home any longer. That is where an anonymous patron has swooped in to send her off to college and all he requires…a monthly letter of her academic progress.

Based off the book and musical “Daddy Long Legs”

Pairing: Bruce Wayne x Reader

last part // series masterlist // next part

To Mr. “Batman” Smith 

1st OCTOBER

Dear Batman, 

You can't imagine how different college is from the Home. I never dreamed there was such a place in the world. I'm feeling sorry for everybody who isn't a girl and who can't come here; I am sure the college you attended when you were a boy couldn't have been so nice. My room is up in a tower that used to be the contagious ward before they built the new infirmary. There are three other girls on the same floor of the tower—a Senior who wears spectacles and is always asking us to please to be a little quieter, and two Freshmen named Harriet Kane and Barbara Gordan. Barbara, who likes to be called Babs, has the most beautiful red hair and a turn-up nose and is quite friendly; Harriet comes from one of the first families in Gotham and hasn't noticed me yet. They room together and the Senior and I have singles. Usually, Freshmen can't get singles; they are very scarce, but I got one without even asking. I suppose the registrar didn't think it would be right to ask a properly brought-up girl to room with a foundling. You see there are advantages! My room is on the northwest corner with two windows and a view. After you've lived in a ward for eighteen years with twenty roommates, it is restful to be alone. This is the first chance I've ever had to get acquainted with myself. I think I'm going to like her. Do you think you are? 

TUESDAY

 They are organizing the freshman basketball team and there's just a chance that I shall get in it. I'm not sure I’m the best pick, but I am quick. While the others are hopping about in the air, I can dodge around them and grab the ball. That’s a skill I picked up from caring for so many rambunctious children, I am excellent at avoiding messes. It's loads of fun practicing—out on the athletic field in the afternoon with the trees all red and yellow and the air is full of the smell of burning leaves, and everybody laughing and shouting. These are the happiest girls I ever saw—and I am the happiest of all! I meant to write a long letter and tell you all the things I'm learning (Mother Waller said you wanted to know), but the 7th hour has just rung, and in ten minutes I'm due at the athletic field in gymnasium clothes. Don't you hope I'll get on the team? 

Yours always, 

Y/N Abbott

PS. (9 o'clock.) Barbara just poked her head in at my door. This is what she said: 'I'm so homesick that I simply can't stand it. Do you feel that way?' I smiled a little and said no; I thought I could pull through. At least homesickness is one disease that I've escaped! I never heard of anybody being orphanage-sick, did you? 

10th OCTOBER

Dear Bats, 

Did you ever hear of Michael Angelo? He was a famous artist who lived in Italy in the Middle Ages. Everybody in English Literature seemed to know about him, and the whole class laughed because I thought he was an archangel. He sounds like an archangel, doesn't he? The trouble with college is that you are expected to know such a lot of things you've never learned. It's very embarrassing at times. But now, when the girls talk about things that I never heard of, I just keep still and look them up in the encyclopedia. I made an awful mistake the first day. Somebody mentioned Maurice Maeterlinck, and I asked if she was a freshman. That joke has gone all over college. I’d never read Great Expectations and never known Meg, Jo, Beth, and Amy. I spend any moment I can in the library scouring books. I have so many worlds in my head. It’s magical! But anyway, I'm just as bright in class as any of the others—and brighter than some of them! 

Do you care to know how I've furnished my room? It's a symphony in brown and yellow. The wall was tinted buff, and I've bought yellow denim curtains and cushions and a mahogany desk (second hand for three dollars). I don’t know if you ever had the lemon squares during your visit to the Home, but they are my specialty. Lemons are yellow, and therefore my favorite color. One of my favorite memories is my father picking me up and swinging me in the air. He used to call me Lemoncake. It’s one of the few memories I have. Hence my love for all things yellow and lemon. 

Now back to my room! The windows are high; you can't look out from an ordinary seat. But I unscrewed the looking-glass from the back of the bureau, upholstered the top, and moved it up against the window. It's just the right height for a window seat. You pull out the drawers like steps and walk up. Very comfortable! Barbara Gordon helped me choose the things at the Senior auction. She has lived in a house all her life and knows about furnishing. You can't imagine what fun it is to shop and pay with a real five-dollar bill and get some change—when you've never had more than a few cents in your life. I assure you, Batman dear, I do appreciate that allowance. Babs is the most entertaining person in the world—and Harriet Kane the least so. It's odd what a mixture the registrar can make in the matter of roommates. Barbara thinks everything is funny and Harriet is bored at everything. She never makes the slightest effort to be amiable. She believes that if you are a Kane, that fact alone admits you to heaven without any further examination. She and I were born to be enemies. And now I suppose you've been waiting very impatiently to hear what I am learning?

 I. Latin: Second Punic war. Hannibal and his forces pitched camp at Lake Trasimenus last night. They prepared an ambuscade for the Romans, and a battle took place at the fourth watch this morning. Romans in retreat. 

II. French: 24 pages of the Three Musketeers and third conjugation, irregular verbs.

III. Geometry: Finished cylinders; now doing cones. 

IV. English: Studying exposition. My style improves daily in clearness and brevity.

V. Physiology: Reached the digestive system. Bile and the pancreas next time. 

Yours, on the way to being educated, 

Y/N Abbott

PS. I hope you never touch alcohol, Bats? It does dreadful things to your liver.

WEDNESDAY

Dear Batman, 

I wish Mother Waller would use a little more ingenuity about choosing names. She gets the last names out of the telephone book—you'll find Abbott on the first page—and she picks the first names up anywhere; she got Y/N from a tombstone. It feels as though it should belong to the kind of girl I'm not—a sweet little thing, petted and spoiled by all the family, who romps her way through life without any cares. Wouldn't it be nice to be like that? Whatever faults I may have, no one can ever accuse me of having been spoiled in any way recently! But it's great fun to pretend I've been. Do you want to know something? I have three pairs of kid gloves. I've had kid mittens before from the Christmas tree, but never real kid gloves with five fingers. I take them out and try them on every little while. It's all I can do not to wear them to classes. (Dinner bell. Goodbye.)

FRIDAY

What do you think, Batman? The English instructor said that my last paper shows an unusual amount of originality and I’ve attached it to the page before this if you missed it. She did, truly. Those were her words. It doesn't seem possible, does it, considering the eighteen years of training that I've had? The aim of The Bowery Home (as you doubtless know and heartily approve of) is to turn the ninety-seven orphans into ninety-seven twins. The unusual artistic ability which I exhibit was developed at an early age through drawing chalk pictures of Mother Waller on the woodshed door. I hope that I don't hurt your feelings when I criticize the home of my youth? But you have the upper hand, you know, for if I become too impertinent, you can always stop payment of your cheques. That isn't a very polite thing to say--but you can't expect me to have any manners; a foundling asylum isn't a young ladies' finishing school.

You know, Bats, it isn't the work that is going to be hard in college…It's the play. 

Half the time I don't know what the girls are talking about; their jokes seem to relate to a past that everyone but me has shared. I'm a foreigner in the world and I don't understand the language. It's a miserable feeling. I've had it all my life. At the high school, the girls would stand in groups and just look at me. I was different and everybody knew it. I could FEEL `orphan' written on my face. And then a few charitable ones would make a point of coming up and saying something polite. I HATED EVERY ONE OF THEM--the charitable ones most of all.

Nobody here knows that I was brought up in an asylum. I told Barbara Gordon that my mother and father were dead and that a kind old gentleman was sending me to college which is entirely true so far as it goes. I don't want you to think I am a coward, but I do want to be like the other girls, and that Dreadful Home looming over my childhood is the one great big difference. If I can turn my back on that and shut out the remembrance, I think I might be just as desirable as any other girl. I don't believe there's any real, underneath difference, do you?

Anyway, Babs likes me! 

Yours truly, 

Y/N “Searching for a new last name” Abbott

SATURDAY MORNING

I've just been reading this letter over and it sounds pretty un-cheerful.

But can't you guess that I have a special topic due Monday morning and a review in geometry and a very sneezy cold?

SUNDAY

I forgot to post this yesterday, so I will add an indignant postscript.

We had a bishop this morning, and WHAT DO YOU THINK HE SAID? `The most beneficent promise made us in the Bible is this, "The poor ye have always with you." They were put here in order to keep us charitable.' The poor, please observe, being a sort of useful domestic animal. If I hadn't grown into such a perfect lady, I should have gone up after service and told him what I thought.

25th OCTOBER

Dear Batman,

I love college and I l have decide I love you for sending me—I'm very, very happy, and so excited every moment of the time that I can scarcely sleep. I'm on the basketball team and you ought to see the bruise on my left shoulder. It's blue and mahogany with little streaks of orange. Harriet Kane tried for the team, but she didn't get in. Hooray! You see what a mean disposition I have. College gets nicer and nicer. I like the girls, and the teachers, and the classes, and the campus, and the things to eat. We have ice cream twice a week and we never have corn-meal mush. You only wanted to hear from me once a month, didn't you? And I've been peppering you with letters every few days! But I've been so excited about all these new adventures that I MUST talk to somebody, and you're the only one I know. Please excuse my exuberance; I'll settle pretty soon. If my letters bore you, you can always toss them into the wastebasket. I promise not to write another till the middle of November. 

Love,

Y/N Bennett (What do you think of this instead of Abbott?)

At the end of the October letters, all Bruce could think was that she had said she loved him and then changed to signing off with love. What could she mean by that? It had been so long since someone had directed those words toward him. He was thoroughly baffled. It was the most curious postscript he’d ever received. Why would she be sending him love? He was confused by the effect this girl had on him. He knew very well all of the things she had mentioned in her letters, but still, he had the urge to revisit every last book and have another look. He read the letter again to see if he could try and understand this most curious of creatures. He was utterly lost. He went back to that word: LOVE. The word brought distant memories of his mother, Martha, and how she would kiss him on the head and always smelled of lavender. 

#toomanyrobins #batman x reader #battison x reader #batman imagine #Batman #battison #battison imagine #Bruce Wayne #bruce wayne imagine #Bruce Wayne x reader #batfam #batfamily #batfam imagine #batfam x reader #✉️

[diceriadelluntore]

Storia Di Musica #285 - The Strokes, Is This It, 2001

Si può dire che un Paese che censura una foto così è davvero stupido? Perchè è successo davvero. Colin Lane è un fotografo di moda che ha appena finito un servizio fotografico e si accorge che nella sua borsa qualcuno ha dimenticato un prezioso paio di guanti Chanel. Mentre armeggia con una vecchia Polaroid Big Shot, a cui restano dieci fotografie, la sua ragazza esce dalla doccia. Nasce per caso una foto che piace molto ad entrambi, e che Lane conserva nel suo portfolio. Nei primi mesi del 2001 a Lane è affidata dalle rivista The Face un servizio fotografico con la band del momento, per alcuni "the next big thing" della musica americana, per altri un bluff. Caso vuole che la foto piaccia e il leader di questo gruppo di newyorkesi sulla rampa di lancio chiede se la foto possa essere usata per la copertina di un disco. Avuto il placet dalla sua fidanzata di allora, la foto del lato b diviene la copertina di un grandioso album di debutto. Che la le più importanti catene di vendita di dischi negli Stati Uniti, tra cui Walmart (che nel 2001 valeva negli Stati Uniti il 40% delle vendite di Cd), oscurarono per via del suddetto lato b, con un cartoncino prima e spingendo poi la casa discografica a sostituirla con questa:

un’immagine di tracce di particelle subatomiche in una camera a bolle, una foto scattata nei laboratori del Cern di Ginevra.

Julian Casablancas e Albert Hammond Junior si incotnrano e scoprono di amare la musica nel prestigioso college privato di Le Rosey in Svizzera. Il primo è figlio del fondatore della più importante agenzia di modelle nel mondo, il secondo è figlio di Alber Hammond Senior, cantautore inglese che scrisse moltissime hit negli anni '70 e '80. Ritornato a New York, Casablancas con Nick Valensi, Fabrizio Moretti e Nikolai Fraiture, tre studenti dell'altrettanto prestigioso Dwight School di New York, forma il primo gruppo, a cui si aggiunge Hammond che era a New York per studiare cinema. Leggenda vuole che il primo concerto dei The Strokes avvenga in un club con 6 persone, poi divengono la resident band rock di un altro locale, gestito da Ryan Gentles, che è così ben impressionato che chiede ai 5 di diventare il loro manager. Manda un demo di 3 brani ad alcune etichette indipendenti, tra cui l'inglese Rough Trade, che entusiasta lo pubblica con il titolo The Modern Age, nel 2001, divenendo la prima pubblicazione ufficiale del gruppo. Il successo è clamoroso: l'Ep vende 300 mila copie e nel Regno Unito a giugno viene pubblicato un secondo Ep, Hard To Explain, che debutta al decimo posto della classifica. Inizia qui un percorso particolarissimo: della band piace il rock sporco, grezzo e diretto che ritorna ai fasti antichi, ma che stride non poco con l'aura di ricchi e viziati dei nostri. Ne nasce il dibattito accennato sopra, tra chi li vede come i nuovi salvatori del rock e chi invece una band che non può "naturalmente" sviluppare gli autentici valori rock. Personalmente ritengto che la verità non sta in nessuna delle due istanze, ma posso dire con criterio che il primo disco della band dimostra cose notevoli. In un primo momento, fu chiamato a produrre Gil Norton, che scoprì i Pixies, ma la band non fu affatto felice del lavoro di rifinitura, preferendo virare sull'allora sconosciuto Gordon Raphael: si trasferiscono ai Transporterraum Studios dell'East Village di New York, una sorta di scantinato buio dove si muore dal caldo dove però è allestito uno studio con le migliori attrezzature dell'epoca. Casablancas decide di registrare senza nessun lavoro di post produzione, spesso in una singola registrazione. Ne viene fuori un disco che unisce, visto che siamo a New York, la spensieratezza dei Television, l'immediatezza dei Ramones e un pizzico di fascino alla Velvet Underground.

Is This It si apre con l'omonima traccia, scritta tra l'altro all'ultimo momento da Casablancas che non trovava un ritornello adatto apre il disco, fresca, immediata, ma non così sciagurata come il punk. Tutto il disco è giocato su questo binario, al netto di canzoni bellissime, come Hard To Explain, dal muro di chitarre che ricorda i bei tempi e che rappresenta in maniera persino sincera la confusione del passaggio all'età degli adulti (I missed the last bus, I'll take the next train\I'll try but you see, it's hard to explain\I say the right thing, but act the wrong way\I like it right here, but I cannot stay). Notevoli sono anche Last Nite (che però ruba il riff a American Girl di Tom Petty And The Heartbreakers, dall'omonimo album di debutto del 1977) e Alone, Together, su una relazione che non vuole davvero funzionare (Oh, the first time it happened too fast\And second time I thought it would last\We all like it a little different). Take It Or Leave It, dal canto strozzato di Casablancas, doveva essere il singolo trainante e che doveva dare il titolo all'album, che ha altre due piccole storie da raccontare: Soma arriva dal romanzo di Aldous Huxley Il mondo nuovo (1932). Nel libro, “soma” è il nome di una droga immaginaria, una sostanza, prodotta in compresse, che rende euforici e cancella ogni paura. «Soma is what they would take when\Hard times opened their eyes», canta Julian in apertura. Gli Strokes non sono gli unici ad aver subito il fascino di questo elisir della felicità: già gli Smashing Pumpkins gli avevano dedicato un pezzo di Siamese Dream (1993) e prima di loro, nel 1984, avevano pubblicato la loro Soma anche i Tuxedomoon. New York City Cops è una canzone denuncia della brutalità della polizia. Casablancas ha raccontato di averla scritta in risposta all’omicidio di Amadou Diallo nel 1999 (episodio a cui Springsteen dedicò la formidabile American Skin (41 Shots). Lo studente guineano era disarmato quando quattro poliziotti in borghese a New York gli hanno sparato per errore: pensavano che al posto del portafoglio stesse tirando fuori dalla tasca una pistola. La canzone, che faceva originariamente parte di Is This It, dopo gli eventi dell’11 settembre viene rimossa dall’edizione americana (rispetto ad altri paesi, l'uscita era slittata a fine settembre). Principalmente per via ritornello: New York City cops, New York City cops\New York City cops, but they ain't too smart.

Il disco fu un successo, prima in Europa, e poi, gradualmente, negli Stati Uniti. Divennero, come scrisse una famosa rivista di moda, "i nuovi depositari del chiodo (inteso come giubbino di pelle, ndr) solo che rispetto a quello dei Ramones questo è di Yves Saint Laurent". La loro carriera continua ancora oggi, ma avendo perso quella sensazione che avevano all'inizio, l'essere la nuova speranza per far resuscitare il rock. Non lo sono stati, ma non si può dire che fossero un bluff, e lo dimostra ciò che dicono in Star Treatment gli Arctic Monkeys (del 2018):

I just wanted to be one of The Strokes Now look at the mess you made me make Hitchhiking with a monogrammed suitcase Miles away from any half-useful imaginary highway

#the strokes #is this it #2001 #recensione

[adhd-mode-activate]

I'm gonna cry, honestly

in my senior year of college, my grades really slipped, to the point that when grades for my last semester came out, it was clear that with what I had I couldn't graduate. I honestly would've been more surprised if I had been able to graduate

my parents and I talked. a lot. my mom was disappointed, but we talked and we're doing better now. my dad was frustrated, but he also looked at me and told me to read the date on his diploma. and then asked how he could be mad when I did exactly the same thing he did

the assumption was that I would have to take at least one more class in my field of study, which is Biblical Studies, so the options for where I can get a relevant class are...limited

but my dad said to wait. just wait. be patient until I got an email from the registrar saying what I needed.

I got that email today, from the dean of my school. he told me I needed one more credit hour in my department to graduate. and then he said that since I'd done my internship for zero credit hours, if I did the paper evaluating my internship he could bump it up to one credit hour with no extra charge

I think I cried for an hour. I actually get to graduate. I get to spend my money and time saving up for a home and a newer car and buying food for my darling cat.

It's weird, thinking how much that hit me. Freshman me would've been shocked and somewhat horrified that I was so relieved just to graduate. But it feels like the days I wake up and realize that it's not so bad to be alive

I get to graduate

#sorry I needed to ramble about that somewhere #and nobody irl besides my parents (and siblings) knows that it was ever in question #my dad specifically planned to find a way to avoid ever telling his parents because of how they'd react #but now I can actually put may 2023 as my graduation date #thanks to the dean of my school #because he was the one contacted by the registrar and *he* sorted everything out for me #I'm gonna go cry again #I feel so cared for #my mom said something about how my professors know that I'm capable of more than I showed in the past year #and they know that college students can be *stupid* sometimes #and I almost didn't believe her #but now I feel like I do #anyway don't mind the long post I'm gonna go write that paper now and then cry again

[pearls-and-vignettes]

A pearl. Bright blue in coloration. It details a conversation betweeen two parties.

1002.321 - PRIVATE Markings of Ash, Ground Coral into Lines

MA: Good thing they never revoked my access to the registrars'. MA: Here, the last entry on the ascension log: MA: "One-Spoked Wheel, Non-Associate, Subordinate of the Feathered Wing House of Void Studies; Self-ascended, Gilded Mask Superstructure Void Site 07; Notes: 'Fuck all of you.'" GCL: Poor little guy... Didn't even have a home AND they left him behind? MA: That is everyone. GCL: What MA: All of our residents have either left or ascended. I have sent a few inquiries to other groups' seniors and their logs further characterize this truth. We are effectively alone GCL: Wait so like GCL: We can party? GCL: Like do whatever we want? MA: Essentially, yes. There are no more engineers to monitor our actions, no more councils to decide what taboos we can and cannot have. We no longer have to police our own speech, thank goodness for the 1% extra processing capacity that frees up. GCL: One percent more than any of them could have processed individually. GCL: Or even collectively for that matter! MA: Look, the current moment isn't the time for commiseration. We resented them, and most of them resented us, I understand. But we each need to find a new directive. GCL: I thought that we could only focus on solving the Great Problem GCL: Isn't that what we're both doing? Right now? MA: I... MA: I may have developed a methodology over a long enough timeline that any analyst rummaging through my output would account for my 'erroneous' calculations with even a relatively small margin of error. MA: I can write onto Pearls recursive, open space, alongside an algorithm that calls for the copying of existing data onto the Pearl, as well as its simultaneous deletion. This process results in the deletion of both the source and the copy, as our cells do not have enough time to designate the copied information as such before the deletion order is sent. MA: At its mildest, this somewhat scrambles the affected data, rendering it inert if there is no action to read it, and at worst, the data is completely obliterated. Like a parchment set alight. MA: A certain engineer responsible for giving the first of our kind instructions intended to repurpose their instructions for the creation of smaller, less specialized computers responsible for more menial tasks. MA: This consequently means that not all of our cells contain the relevant taboo. GCL: So if we run that Pearl fast enough... MA: We can effectively obliterate the taboo. MA: It would've been a simple fix to implement, really. MA: What a /shame/ that their attentions were just too centered on themselves. GCL: I thought you said no commiseration! MA: I am submitting one of the Pearls I've generated to you as a research sample. I am also submitting a second Pearl with more detailed instructions. Up your water intake by at least 15% when running this, or you will get strained pretty badly. GCL: How can I send this to my own neighbors? Material transmission between two Iterators isn't really a thing everybody has... MA: I do not know. Perhaps you can dictate to them what to write on their own Pearl, but there is a considerable chance for error in that, and this process can be extremely damaging if not done correctly. GCL: Oh, I know! MA: Hm? GCL: I could get the lizards to carry them to their cans! MA: Very funny. MA: Enjoy. END OF TRANSMISSION

#cat2 #rainworld #rwpc`MA #rwpc`GCL

[beardedmrbean]

LONDON -- A surgical tool “the size of a dinner plate” has been discovered inside a woman’s abdomen 18 months after undergoing a caesarean section while giving birth to her child, health officials have confirmed.

The unnamed woman from New Zealand, who was in her 20’s when she gave birth to her child in 2020, underwent a scheduled caesarean section at 36 weeks plus three days gestation, according to a report released by New Zealand’s Health and Disability Commissioner, Morag McDowell.

“An Alexis wound retractor (AWR), a device used to draw back the edges of a wound during surgery, was left in her abdomen following her C-section,” the report said. “This resulted in the woman suffering chronic abdominal pain until the device was discovered incidentally on an abdominal CT scan.”

At the time of her procedure, a host of operating room theatre staff were present at the C-section, including a surgeon, a senior registrar, an instrument nurse, three circulating nurses, two anesthetists, two anesthetic technicians, and a theater midwife, officials said.

However, the woman soon began to fee serious pains in her abdomen and began reporting this to her doctor “a number of times in the 18 months after the C-section,” including, on one occasion, going to the emergency room at Auckland City Hospital because the pains were so severe.

On the day of the procedure, the surgeon performed a midline laparotomy and initially used a large-sized AWR, according to the report.

“However, the surgeon stated that this was too small for the incision, so it was removed and replaced with an extra-large AWR,” officials said.

The senior registrar who was on site during the C-section said in the report that “a midline incision was made and an Alexis retractor was inserted, however it was too small for the incision.”

This instrument was subsequently removed and replaced with a larger with a larger Alexis retractor.

“The Case Review found that it was this second AWR (size XL) that was retained,” according to the report. “It should be noted that the retractor, a round, soft tubal instrument of transparent plastic fixed on two rings, is a large item, about the size of a dinner plate. Usually, it would be removed after closing the uterine incision (and before the skin is sutured).”

Continued and picture of the device being used for a caesarean under the cut, you have been warned.

not super gross, but some folks don't want to see that.

“As far as I am aware, in our department no one ever recorded the Alexis Retractor on the count board and/or included in the count,” an unnamed nurse is quoted as saying in the medical report. “This may have been due to the fact that the Alexis Retractor doesn’t go into the wound completely as half of the retractor needs to remain outside the patient and so it would not be at risk of being retained.”

Two of the nurses present said they had no recollection of the case. However, one of the nurses recalls opening a second AWR. She noted that this was very unusual, and they had never had to do so before or since.

“I remember being asked by the scrub nurse to open another Alexis wound retractor … We had none in the prep room, so I quickly fetched one from the sterile stock room,” the other nurse said. “I opened this to the scrub nurse and left it at that. I do not remember telling [one of the other nurses] that I opened it and I did not write this with the count, as at this time this item was not part of our count routine.”

The report released announcing this incident is a full assessment of what happened in the operating theater at the time of her C-section.

“I acknowledge the stress that these events caused to the woman and her family. The woman experienced episodes of pain over a significant period of time following her surgery until the AWR was removed in 2021,” the health commissioner said. “I accept her concerns regarding the impact this had on her health and wellbeing and that of her family.”

The commissioner recommended that the woman be provided a written apology by hospital staff and a review of hospital practices is now underway.

Said the commissioner: “However, I have little difficulty concluding that the retention of a surgical instrument in a person’s body falls well below the expected standard of care — and I do not consider it necessary to have specific expert advice to assist me in reaching that conclusion.”

#nunyas news

[shrivenkateshwarauniversity]

Shri Venkateshwara University commemorated the World Environment Day with a Grand Plantation Drive & Environment Awareness Rally.

Shri Venkateshwara University/VGI Meerut commemorated the World Environment Day with a Grand Plantation Drive & Environment Awareness Rally.

Along with the UP Forest Department, we hosted a seminar wherein the speakers appealed to plant more trees and make India polythene free.

The Group Chairman Dr Sudhir Giri, Pro Chancellor Dr Rajiv Tyagi, Senior IFS Officer Mr SP Singh, & the Forest Department Senior Police Officer Mr. Amit Rathi inaugurated the event by offering flowers to Goddess Saraswati.

In collaboration with the UP Forest department, the Venkateshwara Group planted over 5000 plants in both the campuses & the national highway & pledged to protect & promote them.

These included Banyan, Parijat, Tulsi, Gooseberry, Neem, Jamun, Rudraksh and many types of plants.

On this occasion, we felicitated over a dozen constables, forest guards, rangers, DFOs, & Inspectors by presenting them a shawl & memento.

The Group Chairman, Dr Sudhir Giri, reiterated it’s a wonderful coincidence that today is the birthday of our honourable CM, Mr. Yogi Adityanath.

To achieve PM’s mission of a clean India Green India, we should make it a habit to present plants on social occasions such as marriage & anniversary. This way we play our part in nation development.

Senior IFS Mr. SP Singh asserted the Venkateshwara Group is renowned for offering quality education & its social obligations. In this context, the UP forest department has aligned with Venkateshwara Group and planted over 5000 trees to improve the environment.

The Pro Chancellor Dr Rajiv Tyagi announced we can reduce global warming & pollution by planting more & more trees.

Those present included the Registrar Dr Piyush Pandey, Dr CP Kushwaha, Dr Vivek Sachan, Dr Yogeshwar Sharma, Dr SN Sahu, Dr Ram Kumar, Dr Anil Jaiswal, & Dr S Baghel.

Noticeable with their presence was the Meerut Campus Director Dr Pratap Singh, Dev Pratap Singh, Gurdayal Katiyar, Arun Goswami, Maroof Chaudhary, Vishal Sharma, Navneet Saini, & Rinki Sharma.

Also present were Sanjeev Pal, Pritpal & the Media In Charge Mr. Vishwas Rana among others.

#best private university

[quilavastudy]

Hi, hope you're well! I've been following your blog for 8 years now I think and your blog has been really useful so thank you. I'm in my final year at med school and I am just a bit scared about starting my FY job as I've heard not great experiences and heard how some people had no support and im just worried about the lack of support and being left alone on the ward with no senior support & how some doctors are not good at being clear with their instructions. Do you have any reassurance for this or any advice on how to overcome this (if this makes sense)?

Hi! Sorry for the late reply on this, I don't come on here often anymore! That's amazing that you've followed me for so long, that's almost as long as I've had this blog (I think I started it 9 years ago)!

Firstly congrats on making it to final year, and I hope finals/allocations/etc go ok. I know this is probably a stressful year to graduate what with the current political climate and everything.

I think F1 can be variable. I was lucky to start in a friendly hospital in a very well supported job, but I know people who were more on their own.

I think the important thing to remember is even if you feel like you're on your own, you're not on your own. As an F1 you're supposed to be supported, you're just starting out and people are expecting you to ask for help. I wasted so much time as an F1 stressing about calling seniors, thinking - "will they think I'm silly for asking this?" when looking back, I should've just asked! There's always going to be someone you can turn to - whether it's the med reg, your F2, a nurse, one of the night shift coordinators etc.

Don't feel like you have to shoulder all the responsibility - if you're left alone on a ward with no support and things start falling apart, call someone (e.g. one of the registrars for the ward). Make sure you advocate for yourself and stand up for yourself, don't be afraid to call for help. Don't feel guilty about it either, they're being paid more than you because they're supposed to be there for you. Likewise if a senior doctor gives you a plan you don't understand, be confident and say 'I'm new to this specialty, do you mind explaining this to me?' - I had to do this a lot on haematology as a new F1 as i had no idea what gobbledigook was coming out of their mouths!

Also, in the rare instance you have any issues getting senior support (e.g. reg is asleep in the doctors mess with their phone off) - don't be afraid to escalate this. As an F1 you'll have an educational supervisor and then also a clinical supervisor for each rotation, who are consultants. They should be there if you need to voice any concerns about your job.

And finally, make sure you have things in your life other than medicine, something that you can look forward to doing and unwind with. Don't sacrifice your life to this job/career - you're not paid enough for that! xxx

PS: also please feel free to DM me if you'd like to chat more about F1

#quilava answers #medblr #medicine #FY1

[riverstardis]

when the whistle blows:

jez slept with elle's son sjsjdjfdjdfg he wakes up to her shouting up to kalen and obviously recognises her voice😭

he escapes out the window just in time and is clinging on to the drain pipe when elle comes in and finds a condom wrapper on the floor and reminds kalen he isn't allowed to bring girls home because it sets a bad example or something and when she's gone the drain pipe breaks and jez falls to the floor😭😭

cal😢😢😢

sam's had to cancel cal's surgical rotation because of the current "staffing situation" so now cal's gonna come round to ethan and alicia's side. he's also cancelled overtime so dylan's been taken off the rota

cal: "i've lost my surgical rotation" dylan: "i think i've lost the will to live!" SJSJDJFJHF

lmaoo elle and jacob laughing at jez bc he obviously had a "good night" and he's limping and elle's like "i am so glad i have boys, imagine your daughter bringing that home" well..... 😭😭

the sexy underwear photoshoot thing Somebody edited alicia's face onto and sent round to everyone... i was thinking about this on saturday's ep actually with stevie yknow. noel's looking at it with ethan and lily and he's asking if it's real and lily says it doesn't look like it and ethan says who would do that and noel's still laughing without realising that ethan and lily are clearly not finding it funny???

cal: "can you believe him? sam?" ethan: "what he's sent dylan home!?" cal: "yeah" lily: "well if there isn't the money" ethan: "first they came for the socialists" alicia: "hm?" cal: "ethan keeps going on about this poem" lily: "the trust has to follow cost improvement programs" ethan: "first they came for the consultants" alicia: "nothing rhymes with consultants" ethan: "and i did not speak out, as i was not a consultant" cal: "then they came for me" ethan: "it's niemoller" lily: "it's pronounced niemuller, and it's just a postponed rotation, don't overreact" cal: "wait until they come for you!" oh like you did cal? cause you didn't care until you lost your surgical rotation?

anyways mann i miss these four so much😭😭 maybe i'm forgetting but i don't think there's been a time since these guys that all the junior doctors have been such a tight group? same with the consultants too actually, even when they don't get on, but i guess ethan becoming a consultant was always gonna change that as i suppose the reason they don't really mix with each other is there's quite a big age and experience gap between the junior doctors as a whole and the consultants as a whole here, and ethan becoming a consultant moved that gap to within the consultants so while he mixed more with connie, elle, and dylan professionally, personally he continued to be closer to alicia, and alicia was noticeably more senior than rash, bea, and eddie, so the lines got super blurred, and they've never really been unblurred since. though actually i'd say the lines probably started to blur when rash joined because then the difference in experience within the junior doctors was like f1 to senior registrar on the verge of consultancy, and then of course ethan became more involved personally (FRIENDSHIP) with connie for a while. anyway sorry for that massive tangent

alicia finding out about the photos :( i think if i didn't know it was gem, i'd probably think it was cal or sam doing it

ah sam's frozen the locum budget. and now lily's coming round. cal says they should be showing solidarity with elle and dylan and ethan asks what he suggests since they can't strike (cut to them striking in the next episode lmao) and cal suggests they work to rule

"the only thing that keeps this place running is our good will" unfortunately real

lmaoo elle having a go at kalen saying he shouldn't be bringing girls home and he pushes her for why until she says she doesn't want him having sex and he's like "were you having sex at my age?" and i think the fact that she gets angrier instead of answering is as good an answer as any sjsjdsjfjk

ah more sam/cal homoeroticism

cal pointing out that the hospital seems to have enough money to pay sam's salary👀

"look, she understands!" "well how understanding was she back there eh?" "she thought you were a girl!" "oh great, but i'm a man, and i work with her? oh that'll be no problem then" sjsdjsdjdf jez is screwed

sam calls cal ethan lily and alicia into the staffroom and they're all determinedly not engaging with him and he's like "i am spartacus is it?" but then he points out how cal lost his surgical rotation which the other three didn't know so they all immediately look at him sjsjdjsdf

cal and sam really couldn't get any closer at this point like they're practically touching🤨

ahh this is the scene from the bloopers where rich and tom start leaning in to kiss SJDSJFDJ

"what's the difference between sam strachan and god? god doesn't think he's a doctor." damn😭😭

LMAOO cal somehow gets even closer to sam and goes "i'm gonna have you." and sam's like "mm?"👀👀👀👀👀👀

"i'm gonna go to the union. we'll organise a strike. and you'll be destroyed." "that's fine. you better not miss." okay sam deffo just looked at cal's lips there😭😭😭

the junior doctors strike sl was so good whyy did it have to end in cal's death😫😫

this is where i ended my rewatch last time but i think this time i'll watch part one of reap the whirlwind and then i'll watch some s32. drama's almost up to alicia's rape sl which i haven't rewatched in a couple of years so i'll pick it up there. i also wanna watch rash's first ep and i might even brave some clinical lead ethan eps. ideally i would avoid leigh-anne completely but unfortunately her appearances cross over with alicia's sl

#classic casualty #when the whistle blows #this has been in my drafts for ages bc tumblr kept fucking with it #bits of it kept disappearing??? #so consequently i haven't posted any of the eps i've watched since either but i will do now

[facultytick]

Teaching Faculty Jobs 16 August 2022 Announcement & Interview Notification By Faculty Tick

https://facultytick.blogspot.com/2022/08/teaching-faculty-jobs-16-august-2022.html

Diamond Harbour Women’s University invites applications for the post of Contractual Teacher (Temporary) in the Department of Botany and Contractual Librarian (Temporary)

Applications are invited from excellent academic record and relevant work experience for recruitment to the Contractual Teacher/ Contractual Librarian post

Pt. Ravishankar Shukla University invited Applications from eligible candidates for the following post of Guest Faculty Recruitment

Application invited from the eligible candidates for the Post of Guest Faculty for the following vacancies

Fakir Mohan University invited Applications from eligible candidates for the following post of Project Assistant Recruitment

Application invited from the eligible candidates for the Post of Project Assistant for the following vacancies

Delhi Technological University Walk-in interview for engagement of Guest Faculty in the Department of Environmental Engineering for the odd semester

Application invited from the eligible candidates for the Post of Guest Faculty for the following vacancies

Sreenarayanaguru Open University Invites Applications from the eligible candidates for the post of Deputy Registrar / Assistant Registrar / Section Officer

Applications are invited from excellent academic experience for recruitment to the Deputy Registrar / Assistant Registrar / Section Officer post

Somany Institute of Technology & Management invites eligible candidates for appearing in Walk in interview for the following Teaching Faculty (Professor/ Associate Professor/ Assistant...

Applications are invited from excellent academic experience for recruitment to the Director / Professor/ Associate Professor/ Assistant Professor post

National Institute of Technology Andhra Pradesh invites eligible candidates for appearing in Walk in interview for the following Technical Associate posts

Applications are invited from excellent academic record and relevant work experience for recruitment to the Technical Associate post

National Institute of Technology Durgapu Applications are invited from Indian citizens for the following Project Engineer post to work in a project funded by...

Application invited from the eligible candidates for the Post of Project Engineer for the following vacancies

Indian Institute of Technology Palakkad invited Applications from eligible candidates for the following post of Senior Project Engineer /System Administrator Recruitment

Application invited from the eligible candidates for the Post of Senior Project Engineer /System Administrator for the following vacancies

National Institute of Technology Karnataka Corrigendum Notice for Walk in interview for the following Temporary Faculty Positions

Applications are invited from excellent academic record and relevant work experience for recruitment to the Temporary Faculty post

Indian Institute of Petroleum and Energy (IIPE) Applications are invited for the post of Junior Research Fellow (JRF) position to work on National...

Application invited from the eligible candidates for the Post of Junior Research Fellow for the following vacancies

Indian Institute of Science Education and Research Thiruvananthapuram invited Applications from eligible candidates for the following post of Software Architect Recruitment

Online applications are invited from excellent academic record and relevant work experience for recruitment to the Software Architect post

Indian Institute of Science Education and Research Mohali invited Applications from eligible candidates for the following post of Field assistant Recruitment

Applications are invited from excellent academic record and relevant work experience for recruitment to the Field assistant post

Yenepoya Institute of Technology invited Applications from eligible candidates for the following post of Teaching Faculty Recruitment

Applications are invited for faculty positions from eligible candidates at the level of Professor/ Associate Professor /Assistant Professor

Indian Institute of Science Education and Research Kolkata Applications are invited from the citizens of India for Research Associate position in the DSTSSERB sponsored...

Application invited from the eligible candidates for the Post of Research Associate for the following vacancies

Sri Venkateswara college of Engineering & Technology (SVCET) Autonomous invites eligible candidates for appearing in Walk in interview for the following Teaching Faculty posts

Applications are invited for faculty positions from eligible candidates at the level of Professor/ Associate Professor /Assistant Professor

Institute of Chemical Technology Announced Extended date of Application Submission for the following Teaching Faculty Positions Main Campus Recruitment

Online applications are invited from excellent academic record and relevant work experience for recruitment to the Assistant Professor post

Madan Mohan Malaviya University of Technology invites eligible candidates for appearing in Walk in interview for the following Guest Faculty posts

Applications are invited from excellent academic record and relevant work experience for recruitment to the Guest Faculty/Retired Faculty post

#facultyjob #teaching #teaching jobs #facultytick

[btsqualityy]

For @faithalenora and anyone else invested, I have more to add with Dr. Min 😈 our doctors here don’t wear the white coat. The interns tend to wear scrubs and SHOs, registrars, more senior people sometimes wear normal clothes but intern Dr. Min would probably wear the free hospital scrubs because who wants to pay money for them when the ones for free do the job? Imagine seeing his buff arms with those short sleeves and seeing how big his pecs got through his scrub top 🤤 also imagine him with his black hair and glasses with scrubs and he has to have coffee with his fellow interns before meeting with his team on the mornings

Imagine how cute he would be with the grannies, he’d sit with them at eye level and explain everything to them in way they’d understand and then he’d give them time to ask questions. He’s the doctor that actually respect everyone in the MDT and listens to each one’s inputs. Plus, he’d be so thorough if one of your patients gets sick, stay with you to help and he’ll ring the family if needs be 😭

Also, when he becomes more senior, he’d still be our daddy Yoongs with the strands of silver hair, slacks and dress shirts 🥴 but he’d be the best mentor to the interns and teach them and he makes sure they enjoy their time being on his team

I have to stop now because I’m back to work tomorrow and I’m still on the bus 😭😭😭

I actually love this concept 😭stop giving me ideas lol

#btsqualityy asks

[jojobegood1]

🇮🇪💘🐕🚨 URGENTISSIME ADOPTEZ SENIOR

[thelastinlinedio]

Eddie Munson has a crush...

okay, ive never written any fan fiction so if anyone reads this and likes it pleaaaase let me know? Its not x-rated or anything (but I think its working its way up to being smut...) Its also too long I know, BUT I couldnt stop once I started. I hope someone likes it :) thanks

Eddie Munson had been staring at the same page of Great Expectations for the past 5 minutes, pretending to read, that way when Beth walked into class he would look smart, and interesting. He figured Beth probably liked smart guys since she always got straight A’s. The 5 minute warning bell rang, and just like clockwork, Beth Campbell walked into 6th period English class. Oh god here she comes, he thought, Act casual…I’m not even gunna look up, I’m just reading my book. I don't care that Beths here, not one bit, I– 

“Hiya Eddie.”

Munson jumped at the sound of her voice and looked up from his book, quickly tucking his hair behind his ears to keep it out of his face. Beth smiled her big bright smile, unloaded the heavy book bag from her shoulder and slumped into her seat. She sat sideways, turned around in her seat and crossed her arms over top of Eddie's desk, “Whatcha reading?” her eyes looked right into his big brown doe eyes so intensely that Eddie's stomach did a backflip. He had to break eye contact and look away, holding up the book in front of his face to show Beth the tattered cover, and to cover his own blushing cheeks.

Eddie Munson had a crush on Beth since he was in the 4th grade, and she was in 3rd. He had fallen and broken his ankle on the blacktop, he was crying and asking for someone to help him but the other kids all just pointed and laughed. “Look Munsons crying!!” they teased, but then, Beth Campbell appeared like an angel, she walked right up to him, held out her hand and helped him up. He remembered leaning on her shoulder for support, even though he was easily a foot taller than her, she helped him limp all the way to the nurses office. They had been good friends after that, every weekend they rode their bikes together around the trailer park, spent hours at the arcade, she watched him practice guitar even though he was terrible at it back then and in the summer they drank slushies all day until they had terrible brain freezes. But in the 9th grade Beth got pretty, like really pretty, she had so many friends that she always had a crowd around her in the halls. She got popular. “Too popular to hang out with Eddie the freak” he thought to himself bitterly. He still thought about her alot, he missed her the most in the summertime. He thought about her at night too, when he was alone in bed touching himself. Her hair, her eyes...he wanted to touch her so badly his whole body ached. After he came he felt empty, it wasn't the real thing, and it never could be, she was just a fantasy. Just like the dungeons and dragons campaigns he spent hours writing to distract himself, all just a fantasy.

 He was never mad at her though, he didn't blame her. That's just the way things were in Hawkins; there were the popular kids, the normal kids, the nerds, and then...there were the freaks. Eddie and the rest of his Hellfire club were on the bottom of the school social hierarchy.

Sometimes when they passed each other in the halls Beth would catch his eyes and smile. Eddie was content that those fleeting smiles would be all that was left of their friendship, until it was Beth's senior year, (and Eddie's second senior year), and by some miracle they had English together. Eddie wanted to rush into the Hawkins High main office and give a big kiss to the school registrar. For an entire hour every day Eddie could stare at the back of Beth's beautiful black hair, he could watch her chew on her pencil and scribble little doodles in the margins of her notepad. Sometimes when she leaned forward in her chair the small of her back would show peeking out from under her shirt and Eddie could catch a glimpse of the top of her underwear. It drove him crazy. Ms. Minnivers class was so boring, the way she would drone on and on at the front of the class was mind numbing, but Eddie didn't care. He wouldn't mind if Ms. Minnivers class lasted all day, as long as Beth was there. 

“Great Expectations?? You're actually reading it?” Beth sounded amazed.

“Well uh, correct me if I’m wrong but I’m pretty sure this is what we have to read...ya know to pass this class.” 

Beth scoffed, “You're actually going to pass this time? Second times the charm, eh Munson?” 

“Ouch!” Eddie put a hand on his heart and feigned a look of horror, “low blow Beth Campbell. Stab a dagger through my heart next time!” She smiled and shook her head, she was used to Eddie's theatrical mannerisms; it's one of the things she liked most about him. 

“I could tutor you sometime, you know, I mean, if you want…” Beth was nervous, she was stumbling over her words, she could feel the heat of a blush rising in her cheeks, “I already wrote my final paper, it's due next week Eddie, have you even started yours??”

Was Beth Campbell blushing? Eddie thought, no..no why would she be blushing talking to me? Eddie decided he would have to really turn up the sarcasm to hide how much he wanted to leap at the chance to be alone with her, “Wowww, taking pity on a poor, dumb, super senior like me? Am I dying?? Is this like an act of charity or something?” Eddie laughed and put on a high pitched British accent imitating Oliver Twist, “please Miss, help out a poor beggar like me, please help me pass English class Miss!” 

“Oh my god Eddie shut up!” Beth groaned and rolled her eyes, “forget it!” she turned around in her seat and put her back to him, crossing her arms in front of her. Part of her wanted to laugh at his ridiculous accent, but part of her was really hurt. He's just making fun of me, he thinks I’m just some nerdy goody two shoes just like everyone else at Hawkins High...

Shiiiit Eddie thought, I blew it. Eddie dropped the accent, cleared his throat and leaned over his desk so close to Beth that he was murmuring into her hair by her ear in a low voice, “Beth, cmon... I’m just embarrassed. I mean you're so smart, I don't want you to have to waste your time tutoring a dope like me..” 

When Beth turned around she was surprised to see Eddie so close to her, was he smelling my hair? She wondered why she liked the idea. She leaned back so her face was inches from Eddies and whispered, “Wellll, first of all, you're not a dope. And second of all…” Beth took a deep breath before quickly spouting out her next sentence as nonchalantly as possible, “maybe you could trade me some weed for my tutoring.” 

Eddie's face went from surprised, to amused in seconds. His whisper turned into a loud sing song voice, “Beeeeeth Campbellll you sly dog!” The goofy grin that spread across his face was contagious and Beth started to laugh, it was only then she noticed Ms. Minniver was at the front of the classroom, writing on the chalkboard. Had class already started? Beth whispered to Eddie quickly, “shhhh! Okay okay, shut up! Is that a yes or a no Munson?”

“Oh, that's a yes! A huge yes!” Eddie answered eagerly, a giant grin still plastered on his face “How about tonight? After Hellfire?  I’ll meet you at my trailer around 7”

Ms. Minniver coughed and started to speak in her monotone voice, “alright class, settle down, settle down, lets begin with Chapter 20 of Great Expectations, who will start us off to read?”

Beth held her book over her face as she turned to whisper to Eddie, “Hellfire? Can’t you skip it? What's more important, some silly game, or graduating high school?”

Eddie's eyes widened so big they looked like golf balls, “I’m gonna pretend you didn't just call Dungeons and Dragons a ‘silly game’ and let it slide because I like you Beth, but there's no way in hell I’m skipping Hellfire!” he hissed. 

“Fiiiine,” Beth sighed, “I’ll meet you at 7. Munson you're absolutely insa—”

“Beth Campbell!” Ms. Miniver snapped, “Why don't you read us the next two paragraphs?”

Beth quickly turned her head and lowered her book to her desk. After a couple seconds she started reading, but Eddie couldn't hear the words coming out of her mouth. 

Beth is coming over tonight…Beth will be in my room tonight…me and her..alone…oh my god I have to clean… oh my god

#eddie munson fic #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson fanfic #stranger things 4 #stranger things fic