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#Slytherin quotes
venusd0om · 1 year
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Draco: I haven't slept in seventy-three hours.
Theodore: Eighty. Democratically elected leader of insomnia.
Pansy: Bitch, it's been ninety for me. I'm going for an even one hundred.
Blaise: You guys are fucking terrifying.
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slytherin-dormitories · 2 months
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verydazedragon · 1 year
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You shall die exquisitely.
—cyrano de bergerac
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Conversation
Hufflepuff: *making a ball out of foil* Who should I throw it at?
Slytherpuff: A bin.
Slytherin: Him!
Hufflepuff: That's the answer I wanted to hear!
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agoddessoffandoms · 2 years
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We’d apologise for being the best house, but we don’t want to.
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funsizepunkelf · 2 years
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not-rab · 5 months
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James: How did you get your brother to co-operate with you?
Sirius: I threatened to reveal his dark secret.
James: Which is what?
Sirius: I have no idea, I was bluffing, but it must be something horrible.
James *nervous sweating*:
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daddiesdrarryy · 3 months
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Barty: You slept with Potter?
Regulus: I didn’t know what else to do! He had those big, sad eyes. I couldn’t help it!
Evan: …sure, sounds like you had no other choice
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moonytoastx · 3 months
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Regulus: "Your eyes are red. Are you high again?"
Barty, imitating Regulus: "ArE yOu HiGH AGaIN?"
Barty: "No, bitch. I've been crying.
Regulus:
Regulus: "Oh."
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rosemarilee · 4 months
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Marauders raising Harry:
Lily: I have put a charm on my house and James and regulus’ house so that you won’t be able to swear in front of Harry anymore
Sirius: this is tyranny
Remus: we have rights
James: all we are asking is that you don’t swear in front of our 4 year old
Sirius: I would never-
Regulus: that’s a bold-faced lie
Sirius: how do we know this charm is real
James: try it
Sirius: Fork- god ham it
Remus: here let me try
Remus: #%#*%#*%#
Sirius: HA
Lily: *groans*
Regulus: HOW DO YOU KNOW MORE SWEARS THAN MAGIC ITSELF
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venusd0om · 1 year
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Draco: Here is my wall of inspirational people.
Theodore: Is that a picture of you?
Draco: Yes, I am big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself.
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slytherin-dormitories · 2 months
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billi-mausi · 4 months
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James: Regulus kissed me!
Sirius(excited): NO!
Peter: OH my god oh my god oh my god!
James(dreamy sighing): It was unbelievable.
Peter: Oh my god oh my god!
Remus: Okay alright! We wanna hear everything! Peter get the wine, James, does this end well or do we need tissues?
James: Oh it ended very well.
Peter(hurrying with the glasses): DON'T start without me! Don't start!
Sirius: Okay let's hear about the kiss!
__________________________________________
Meanwhile
Regulus: And then I kissed him.
Barty: Tongue?
Regulus: Yeah.
Dorcas: Cool.
Barty, Evan, Dorcas & Pandora (nodding and going back to their pizza):
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rhetorical-conscience · 5 months
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Barty: Wait, I thought you guys were dating.
Regulus: What? No. Why would you think that?
Dorcas: To be fair, I also thought you two were dating.
Regulus:
Evan: Raise your hand if you thought James and Regulus were dating.
Everyone: *raises their hand*
Regulus:
Regulus: James, put your hand down.
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nixnight1 · 3 months
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Regulus high with Barty at the Potter's
Sirius: Can I get in here? I need the- Oh my god!!
Regulus using Sirius' clothes and makeup: It's like looking on a mirror!!
Sirius: No it isn’t, Regulus >:(
Regulus: Who's Regulus?
Barty: I already can't tell who is who
Sirius: Take that stuff off
Regulus: Moony! Get in here and settle this!
Sirius: Don't call my boyfriend "Moony"
Remus: What? OH woah-hey Hey, travel size Pads! Awww
Sirius: Moonyyyy, you're encouraging him
James: I need the bathroom... Oh wow this is confusing
Sirius: No, it's not!
Regulus: You're my family and I love you all, but I'm cooler than all of you!
Sirius: I don't say that
James: Well that's all you say
Remus and Barty: Yeah
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loz-tearsofahomo · 2 months
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James: and so I'm pretty sure I'm in love with Reg-
Evan: I'm sorry?
James: Well hes-
Evan: No I'm just sorry.
Barty: yeah mate praying for you
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