{ MASTERPOST } Everything You Need to Know about Investing for Beginners
Fundamentals of investing:
What’s the REAL Rate of Return on the Stock Market?
Do NOT Make This Disastrous Beginner Mistake With Your Retirement Funds
The Dark Magic of Financial Horcruxes: How and Why to Diversify Your Assets
Dafuq Is Interest? And How Does It Work for the Forces of Darkness?
Booms, Busts, Bubbles, and Beanie Babies: How Economic Cycles Work
When Money in the Bank Is a Bad Thing: Understanding Inflation and Depreciation
Investing Deathmatch series:
Investing Deathmatch: Managed Funds vs. Index Funds
Investing Deathmatch: Traditional IRA vs. Roth IRA
Investing Deathmatch: Investing in the Stock Market vs. Just… Not
Investing Deathmatch: Stocks vs. Bonds
Investing Deathmatch: Timing the Market vs. Time IN the Market
Investing Deathmatch: Paying off Debt vs. Investing in the Stock Market
Investing Deathmatch: What Happens in a Bull Market vs. a Bear Market
Now that we’ve covered the basics, are you ready to invest but don’t know where to begin? We recommend starting small with micro-investing through our partner Acorns. They’ll round up your purchases to the nearest dollar and invest the change in a nicely diversified portfolio of stocks, bonds, and ETFs. Easy as eating pancakes:
Start saving small with Acorns
Alternative investments:
Small Business Investing: A Kinder, Gentler Alternative to the Stock Market
Bullshit Reasons Not to Buy a House: Refuted
Investing in Cryptocurrency is Bad and Stupid
So I Got Chickens, Part 1: Return on Investment
Twelve Reasons Senior Pets Are an Awesome Investment
How To Save for Retirement When You Make Less Than $30,000 a Year
Understanding the stock market:
Ask the Bitches Pandemic Lightning Round: “Did Congress Really Give $1.5 Trillion to Wall Street?”
Season 3, Episode 2: “I Inherited Money. Should I Pay Off Debt, Invest It, or Blow It All on a Car?”
Money Is Fake and GameStop Is King: What Happened When Reddit and a Meme Stock Tanked Hedge Funds
Season 3, Episode 7: “I’m Finished With the Basic Shit. What Are the Advanced Financial Steps That Only Rich People Know?”
Wait… Did I Just Lose All My Money Investing in the Stock Market?
Season 4, Episode 1: “Index Funds Include Unethical Companies. Can I Still Invest in Them, or Does That Make Me a Monster?”
Retirement plans:
Dafuq Is a Retirement Plan and Why Do You Need One?
Procrastinating on Opening a Retirement Account? Here’s 3 Ways That’ll Fuck You Over
How to Painlessly Run the Gauntlet of a 401k Rollover
Ask the Bitches: “Can I Quit With Unvested Funds? Or Am I Walking Away From Too Much Money?”
Workplace Benefits and Other Cool Side Effects of Employment
You Need to Talk to Your Parents About Their Retirement Plan
Season 4, Episode 5: “401(k)s Aren’t Offered in My Industry. How Do I Save for Retirement if My Employer Won’t Help?”
Got a retirement plan already? How about three or four? Have you been leaving a trail of abandoned 401(k)s behind you at every employer you quit? Did we just become best friends? Because that was literally my story until recently. Our partner Capitalize will help you quickly and painlessly get through a 401(k) rollover:
Roll over your retirement fund with Capitalize
Recessions:
Season 1, Episode 12: “Should I Believe the Fear-Mongering about Another Recession?”
There’s a Storm a’Comin’: What We Know About the Next Recession
Ask the Bitches: How Do I Prepare for a Recession?
A Brief History of the 2008 Crash and Recession: We Were All So Fucked
Ask the Bitches Pandemic Lightning Round: “Is This the Right Time To Start Investing?”
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