#Symphony in White | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bullet-clubs-bitch · 21 days

Text

My heart Beats for no one but you

Jay White X fem reader Word Count 5K

Main Masterlist Jay White Masterlist

Summary: Everyone wanted to know the real reason Jay White left NJPW to come to AEW when he had contracts around the world. The truth is he came to AEW because of Y/n, the love of his life. He was going insane without her by his side and he knew he would die if they coudn't be together.

Everyone wants to know why I became All Elite. Why I decided to come to AEW when I had offers all around the world. I was the hottest free agent and of all the places to pick I decided to join All Elite Wrestling. Even though I might not be getting booked the way I wanted to I don’t regret signing with AEW, not in the slightest. Why? Well, it’s because of Y/n.

Y/n and I met years ago in Japan. She was in Bullet Club and I was just starting out in New Japan Pro Wrestling. I remember when I met her for the first time. She was everything. She was gorgeous, everything about her was perfect. In a way, I looked up to Y/n. We were the same age but she had the experience over me, she had accomplished so much for her age. She truly was one of the best pro wrestlers out there. Due to that, I would often ask her for advice just as an excuse to talk to her. Two years after my debut in New Japan I realized I was in love with Y/n. I found the courage to ask her out and we began going out in 2017. She even helped me get into Bullet Club, which I am forever grateful for. The two of us were perfect for each other, we fit each other perfectly. I knew she was my soulmate, I knew I would marry her. We spent all of our time together, we were joined at the hip. People claimed it was too much, we were obsessed with each other but the truth was I just found my other half.

Y/n knew that some of the other boys wanted to leave New Japan. She knew they wanted her to go with them but she never told me about the secret plans. Instead, she acted like nothing happened and encouraged me to betray Kenny Omega. “You should turn on Kenny and take over Bullet Club. I’ll help you!” I remember looking at her like she was crazy. “Now why would I do that? Don’t get me wrong I like the idea but why would you encourage me to turn on some of your best friends?” Later I found out that Y/n put in a good word and wanted me to become the new leader of Bullet Club once the Elite left.

A year after Y/n and I made it official, in late 2018 she helped me to take over Bullet Club. Many members such as Kenny, Matt, Nick, Cody and Hangman left the club soon after and ended up leaving New Japan as a whole. I knew Y/n was hiding something from me for months leading up to the betrayal but every time I tried to bring it up I was shut down. “You won’t understand. I’m just under a lot of stress” It was true, she was under a lot of stress. I felt like our relationship was forming cracks due to it. The sneaky phone calls, how she would come home late at night and leave in the morning before I got up. Anyone else would think she was cheating on me but in my gut, I knew it was something different. I knew that whatever it was that was bugging Y/n she would tell me when she was ready.

The night I took over Bullet Club we went out to celebrate. All of my friends such as Juice, Finlay and the remaining members of Bullet Club went out and partied all night. I was sad Y/n didn’t join us. She said she needed to have some meetings with New Japan and I believed her. Once I returned to our shared flat I found Y/n a mess. Her hair was a mess, her makeup was smudged, various empty bottles and half-lit cigarettes were scattered on the floor. I was drunk but the moment I saw Y/n I was instantly sober. I carefully sat down next to Y/n on the floor and carefully asked her what’s wrong? That’s when she broke. Everything she was hiding for months came flooding out. She cried and cried, all I could do was hold her and tell her I was there for her. When she was able to calm down enough to speak she told me everything.

“I’m sorry Jay. I’m sorry I’ve been hiding everything from you. The truth is everyone is leaving New Japan. Kenny, Matt, Nick and Cody want to start their own wrestling promotion and they want me to go with them. They want me to move to America” I didn’t know what to say. I was in shock. This explains why she suggested the betrayal. Everything was slowly starting to make sense. I didn’t want to know the answer to this question but I had to ask. “Are you going to go with them?” “I don’t know. It’s complicated. As much as I love them I don’t know if I can move back to the States on a flip of a dime when there is still so much uncertainty” The truth was I didn’t want Y/n to leave but I knew this could be a big opportunity.

Fast forward a few months and All Elite Wrestling was formed. Y/n had declined the offer to join everyone in America. The Bucks understood her reasoning, the unknown was scary. She liked the stability she had in Japan. They said they would always have a contract with her name on it if she ever changed her mind. I also knew they wouldn’t give up that easily on her. Y/n’s contract with New Japan was up and although she was offered a new one she had a bigger contract waiting for her in America. I’ll never forget the day when I saw that letter arrive in the mail. I felt my stomach drop when I saw it. The difference between this official contract and The Elite asking Y/n to come to America was that this letter was from Tony Khan. The billionaire that invested in AEW. We opened the letter together and discussed the pros and cons of the offer.

Pros: Making way more money, more vacation time, closer to family, better benefits, reuniting with old friends, new opponents, more opportunities, and a guaranteed championship

If I was Y/n I would have taken the contract. Despite whether AEW would succeed or not she would still be making good money. AEW offered her a million-dollar contract, something neither of us expected. The con list was small but for some reason, they were controlling Y/n’s decision.

Cons: No Jay White, move across the world, 14hr time difference, no Jay

“Y/n, I think you should really consider this contract. It’s amazing! You deserve it. I don’t want to be rude or anything but you have done everything in Japan. There is nothing else left for you to do. Just think about it. I’ll be fine here, I can take care of myself.” I didn’t know why Y/n insisted on staying here in Japan with me when I knew she was frustrated and bored.

“I can’t go, Jay!” She told me “Why not? I’d take that contract in a heartbeat!-” “Because I need you. I think I would go insane if I moved to the other side of the world and couldn't see you. I’m completely in love with you Jay. Long distance never works out and there is no way I’m going to let you slip through my fingers” I knew her words were genuine. She wanted to go but was she really willing to sacrifice her dreams to be with me? It took a lot of convincing but Y/n agreed to at least try going to try AEW. We packed the essentials in suitcases and this was the end. I knew how much it would hurt but I couldn't let Y/n throw this away for me. Our drive to the airport was silent. We couldn't say a word without bursting into tears. I was never an emotional person but I now understood how Y/n felt. We said our goodbyes at the gate but neither of us could hold it together. “I can’t do this, Jay. I need to stay here with you” Y/n told me as neither of us dared to break the hug we were currently in. “Then stay. We can figure something out. As selfish as it sounds I need you here with me too” In the end Y/n declined yet another offer from All Elite Wrestling and took the same old New Japan contract she had been in forever. At least this time they offered her more money. Was it anything close to what she could be making in America? No, but it was a job, right?

With Y/n staying in Japan it led us to take over New Japan. The two of us were quickly the faces of the company and were able to solidify ourselves as two of the biggest stars in the history of New Japan Pro Wrestling. This was a big accomplishment for anyone, an even bigger one for two foreigners. I became the first-ever grand slam champion and Y/n made history by being the first woman to win a men’s championship in NJPW. It truly was us against the world, no one could beat us, no one was on our level. We were able to bring back the spotlight to NJPW. In a way we saved wrestling. Even though we were on the highest of highs it didn’t mean we didn’t experience the lows. Social media and pro wrestling never got along. Wrestlers never truly got the appreciation they deserved. Everyone called our sport fake but there is nothing fake about it. Sure some things are predetermined but the injuries, the risk, it was no joke. I could tell you stories about some scary moments in wrestling, this shit is not fake, the people who claim it to be are full of shit. When you are on that mountain people fight for your spot, they envy you, it can get messy at times.

Once I was in a storyline with Will Ospeary and it got way out of hand. It was just supposed to be Will Osepeary Vs Jay White but those freaks in the United Empire couldn't help themselves. They started going after Y/n, they would make inappropriate comments at her, interfere with her matches and on more than one occasion try to snatch her from me. A war had broken out between Bullet Club and the United Empire and unfortunately, Y/n was caught in the middle of it.

I didn’t understand the hyperfixation they had on her. Sure she was stunning but she was taken, she was mine, and everyone knew that. That didn’t stop them from trying to get into her pants. When I first found out about the situation I was furious. I was going to murder the United Empire. The fight was set, this was going to end everything but it was only the beginning.

The ring was chaotic, bodies were everywhere. It was WWIII, Bullet Club Vs The United Empire. During the match, Will and his goons had managed to get to Y/n, who was a special guest commentator. I tried everything in my power to get to her but I was handcuffed and duct-taped to the ring. I was forced to watch their attack on the love of my life. She was defenceless, she couldn't do anything. I was a five-on-one attack. The sound of kendo sticks to the back, snapping in half was sicking but not as bad as the chair shot to the head which busted her open. The worst was the tacks, why on earth would they use thumbtacks? By the time I got free, it was too late. The match was called off, no winner no loser, not even a draw, it went too far. I spent that evening screaming at the entire Bullet Club, why did no one do anything? I fired half of them on the spot. I couldn't even get myself to look Y/n in the eye, I was ashamed of myself. I couldn't protect my woman, I was a coward. “Look at me Jay” I couldn't “Look me in the eye” I turned to see my love’s once-green eyes all red and dark. I held her face in my hands delicately and looked at every mark that was left. I cringed at the 15 stitches and 3 staples in the side of her head. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry honey bee. I should have never let this happen” I told her. “I’m okay, this is not your fault,” she told me reassuringly. “But it is my fault, I did nothing. I watched that whole attack play out and I did nothing. And you’re not okay, you’re concussed, you have stitches and staples in your skull, and you’re covered in welts and bruises. This is not okay, you’re not okay” I was grateful we were alone, I didn’t understand why I had become so emotional. I couldn't stop the tears from falling, I felt weak.

Times like that were hard, shit goes south, and you find yourself being stocked by fans. Not to mention that many of our friends moved on from New Japan. Despite all of that Y/n and I remained loyal to the company. During all of this, AEW just got more and more popular. She would never admit it but I knew a part of Y/n regretted not signing with AEW when she got the chance. I could see it in her eyes. In the few years of the company’s existence, they managed to change the world. I knew deep down that I should have pushed harder for Y/n to go but I was too selfish, I’ll never forget that and promised myself I would repay the favour one day.

That day came sooner than I thought. One day Y/n and I got called into NJPW headquarters to discuss some classified information. I was skeptical and honoured that they wanted us to be a part of such a secret meeting. I was shocked to see that one of the many important faces in the room was none other than Tony Khan himself. He explained that he’s a huge fan of ours and that he would like to have a joint PPV with AEW and NJPW called Forbidden Door. He explained the concept and I was interested. This was a great way to show the American crowd Japanese wrestling and vice versa. I knew this would break the wrestling world, this had never been done before. Dream matches would be made, people all over the world would be talking about this. Best of all Y/n and I were going to be promoting the event. They wanted us to go scout out AEW for who we thought would work best with our talent along with building stories for who we would want to face. Of course, we agreed and soon enough we raided All Elite Wrestling.

During the main event on an episode of Dynamite Y/n and I emerged from the crowd and attacked the people in the ring. By this point, people knew of the joint PPV but didn’t know who would be in it or who would be the first to make a move. Y/n grabbed a mike and introduced us to the crowd, but to our surprise, no introduction was needed. They knew who tf we were. “In case you dumb Americans don’t know who we are, let us introduce ourselves. That right there is Jay Mother Fucken White, The catalyst of professional wrestling and your current IWGP world heavyweight champion. The first and only Grand Slam Champion in New Japan Pro Wrestling and the very best wrestler in Japan. You must live under a rock if you don’t know who I am. In case you don’t recognize me, my name is Y/n Y/l/n or as they call me in Japan ‘The Goddess of Love’. Jay and I lead Bullet Club and have taken over wrestling in Japan. We’re simply the best that Japan has to offer so of course we had to come check out All Elite Wrestling. I’ll admit it’s cute here, different but cute. Boo us all you want but whether you like it or not you will be seeing a lot more of us. We will take over All Elite Wrestling and you all will have no choice but to breathe with the Switchblade!” Just like I thought, they ate it up. Y/n and I made history yet again.

In the weeks leading up to Forbidden Door, many talent from Japan started appearing. The card was booked and everything was going perfectly. I was booked to face Okada, Adam Cole and Hangman Page in a four-way for my title and Y/n would get to wrestle AEW women’s champion Thunder Rosa in a non-title match. I had a good feeling about this show. I knew our matches would go well, one might say they went too well.

Just like I said we would Y/n and I both won our matches. Y/n’s match was so good that after the show Tony Khan proposed Y/n a contract. I felt as if I had gone back in time, we were here before, this was her second chance. “I’ll let you think about it, I don’t need an answer right away,” Tony told her. “So, what do you want to do?” I asked Y/n. “I want to take it, this one is even better than the one they offered me three years ago. I really like it here. There is more opportunity, new opponents, and fuck, that paycheck.” I was so proud of Y/n, I wanted her to take that contract and run as far as she could with it. Sure being far away would be hard but this was my turn to take a step back and let Y/n follow her dreams.

Y/n accepted the contract and made her surprise debut a few months later in October. This time when we sat together in our flat packing everything there were no sad tears. Instead, we savoured the time we had. We were moving on, we were opening a new door, experiencing a new chapter in life and in my gut I knew this would be the best one yet. “I’m going to miss you, Jamie” “I’m going to miss you too Y/n. I’m only one call and one plane trip away” I told her reassuringly. “Yeah except that flight is 14hrs and I’ll be lucky if I can get a direct flight”

***

Once Y/n left, truthfully I was a mess. I didn’t know what to do with myself, we spent every second of every day together. I would come home and expect Y/n waiting for me with open arms but she never was. Our once-shared flat that used to be filled with colour and life was now cold, dark and dead. All of her things were gone, it felt so empty without her. I didn’t realize it at the time but I had fallen into a deep depression. Every night I lay in bed alone, unable to sleep. I would spend the night staring at the empty space next to me, trying to picture Y/n there but I was unable to do so. We called twice a day but it wasn’t the same, I needed her next to me. Along with being unable to sleep I also couldn't find myself able to eat. I had lost all appetite. Y/n would spend hours making the most delicious foods you could imagine even with being a full-time wrestler. Every weekend we would have people over, but now I had no one. I knew how to cook but all I could get myself to make was toast while I sat in the dark.

I hated that I felt this way. Y/n was finally getting her break, she was making millions and doing all of these amazing things while I was over here feeling bad for myself. I was still the IWGP champion but I had no motivation to get out of my bed, let alone wrestle. Cowardly I called NJPW headquarters and put in my sick days. I couldn't let anyone see me in such a state. Y/n had been gone for a month but it felt like she had been gone forever, I felt like I had lost her for good.

One night I was drinking away my sorrows when I heard a loud knock on my door. I couldn't get myself to move off the floor, even if I could I didn’t want to open the door anyways. I wanted to be alone. The knocking wouldn’t stop. Whoever it was wouldn’t leave me alone. “Go away!” I yelled through the door. “It’s me, Riley, come on Jay open up” I wasn’t expecting my best friend El Phantasmo or ‘Riley’ to be on the other side. “Leave me alone Riley” “Don’t make me come in there” I didn’t move. Y/n must have given Riley her keys because he let himself inside, once he spotted me he stopped in his tracks, he looked like he saw a ghost.

Before I could even say anything Riley cut me off. “Y/n gave me her keys once she left. She wanted me to keep an eye on you. I came over because she said you had been ignoring her calls for days. Not to mention everyone at the Dojo is worried about you, we haven’t seen you in weeks” What was he talking about? Y/n hadn’t been calling me. I checked my phone and did indeed find 30 missed calls and about fifty texts over the past four days. “What’s going on man, you look like shit” “I’m fine, I don’t know what you are talking about” Riley gave me a disapproving look before his phone rang. “Yeah, I’m with him right now. Yes, Y/n he’s alive. No, you don’t need to come over here. I’ll look after him. Okay, yes, I will. I’ll tell him. Now get some rest, it’s late over there. Bye Y/n” I felt ashamed of myself.

Riley sat down on the ground next to me and asked “What’s going on? Whatever it is you’re going through you can tell me.” “I don’t know Riley. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep. I can’t do anything, I feel useless. I know this is pathetic of me to say and I will sound selfish but I need Y/n. I’m going crazy without her. I don’t know what’s wrong with me” Riley said nothing, he just let me get everything out. “It’s okay to miss her, Jay. We all miss her but you need to stop relying on her for everything. She’s not always going to be there and hold your hand. You almost made her fly out here Jay.” “Why am I feeling this way?” I asked Riley “Because you love her. I know you know that but you love, love her. I know you have that ring, we picked it out ages ago. If you’re so worried about losing her I think you should think about popping the question. I mean you have been together for the past five years” He was right

That night I left my flat for the first time in weeks, I forgot what the outside world was like. Riley and I walked around the streets of Tokyo and just talked. It was therapeutic, we went out to eat at Y/n’s favourite sushi place and I knew I couldn't keep living like this. I needed to be a supportive partner, I needed to finish what we started together in Japan. Instead of doing everything with Y/n, I needed to be doing everything for her. I had to be a defending champion for her, I needed to main-event Wrestle-kingdom to prove I could take care of myself.

I needed to get my life back on track. I didn’t even realize how much I was impacted by Y/n’s departure. I looked sickly, I wasn’t eating or working out. I had lost a decent amount of muscle and looked pale as a ghost. I wasn’t lying when I said I was sick, this was just a different kind of sick.

***

Instead of sulking, when I missed Y/n the most I would either watch our old matches together or give her a call. I felt bad calling her when I couldn't sleep at 3 am but she reminded me of the time difference. 3 am for me was 5 pm for her but she insisted I call whenever I please even if it’s the middle of the night, so I did just that. This particular evening I was missing her the most, the holidays were soon approaching and I was sad we coudn’t spend them together. “How’s everything going in Japan?” Y/n asked me “It’s alright, I miss you. It’s not the same here without you” I told her honestly. “I know, I’m sorry I can’t be there for Christmas but I have some good news that will make up for it” “What’s that?” I asked curiously “Well, I talked with TK and since I’m working all the holiday shows I can come back to Japan for Wrestle Kingdom!” She said excitedly through the phone. I coudn’t believe what I was hearing. “What’s the catch? There’s always s catch, is it a 24-hour trip?” “Nope, no catch. I asked to do all the Christmas shows so I can come out to see you. I have almost two weeks with you. 13 days, I’ll only miss one week of TV!” “That’s great honeybee, I can’t wait to see you!” “Your main eventing the Tokyo Dome, I wouldn’t miss it for the world!” “I love you, Y/n” “I love you too Jay”

Those few weeks leading up to the Tokyo Dome went by fast and before I knew it I was reunited with the love of my life. It was weird not having Y/n by my side when I took on Okada in the main event of that year’s Wrestle Kingdom but having her front row cheering me on was just as good. Even though I lost I was grateful that I had Y/n there with me. She was always there when I needed her the most and boy did I need her. We spent the remained of Y/n’s trip to Japan spending quality time together. We made the most passionate love to make up for the time spent away and explored the city we became one with.

In the back of my mind, I knew my contract was expiring. Y/n knew of this and I know she wanted me to come to AEW but the truth was they didn’t offer me anything yet. I had many offers from other promotions but the one I wanted most simply didn’t exist yet. For the first time in my career, I was scared, scared of what the future held. I never told Y/n my troubles, instead I faced them alone. I agreed to a loser leaves NJPW match with Eddie Kingston and hoped for the best. I lost that match and felt like a failure, Y/n was front row for that match and I’ll never forget the look on her face when I lost. She comforted me after the match and tried to convince me to join her in AEW. I lied and told her they never offered me a contract when in reality they did and I accepted it. “What do you mean? They love you! I’m sure they will offer you a contract, Jay!” I felt bad for lying but I wanted all of this to be a surprise.

I made my surprise debut in April and although Y/n was mad I didn’t tell her she was happy we were together again. I could have gone anywhere in the world but I needed Y/n by my side.

I took Riley’s advice and proposed to Y/n. “My heart beats for no one but you. Every day I spent without you killed me. I love you so much Y/n. I would do anything and everything for you. Us being apart for those six months made me realize I coudn’t spend another day without you. Y/n Y/m/n Y/l/n, would you marry me?”

So yeah the real reason I joined AEW was to be with the love of my life, my wife. I’d die without her, my heart beats for no one but her.

29 notes · View notes