#THEY WOULD ALL BE DONE

[stil-lindigo]

lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)

if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.

--

no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.

I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.

I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.

If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.

#cw: suicidal ideation #cw: suicide #cw: self harm #cw: mental health #cw: depression #i made the balloon the main representation of my self destructive urges for a reason but im not going to explain it #i tried to keep a lot of the details in this vague #it would be my worst nightmare if this comic encouraged someone to hurt themselves #so. please dont #for a long time even the thought of making this comic felt so insipid and narcissistic #with the state of the world as it is #having the only threat to your life be yourself felt so privileged and trite and shameful #but doing this comic made me sit down and process things in full #and im just. very grateful i didn't give in to my thoughts back when i sincerely felt i'd be more useful to the world dead #i also feel the need to say that this wont represent everyone's battle with mental illness. its unfortunately different for all of us #there is no fix-all #and im afraid this might be one of those comics that either resonates a lot or misses the target by a mile #i made it for myself foremost. and now that its done im glad i did it #thank you for reading #and please stay alive #stillindigo art #stillindigo comics

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[chloesimaginationthings]

Abby meets Cassie’s favorite FNAF animatronic Roxy!

#myart #chloesimagination #comic #abby schmidt #fnaf cassie #fnaf roxy #roxanne wolf #fnaf #fnaf movie #security breach #fnaf ruin #fnaf fanart #five nights at freddy's #ROXY RETURNS 💜💜 #Abby finally meets Roxy! #it only made sense to me that Cassie would introduce Roxy to Abby #Abby wanted her makeup done too! to match the other two #though I felt like glam makeup didn’t match her vibe #the death metal look felt more fitting to Abby’s personality something she’d want #Roxy is their collective cool older sister #SUPER cute to draw out #I love all these gals dearly 💜💜

[theoldkyokodied]

One wedding and three funerals

Background paintings under the cut

#tomgreg #succession #tom wambsgans #greg hirsch #shiv roy #roman roy #kendall roy #yeah no im not tagging everyone thats too much #this is me going 'how much implications themes and symbolism can i fit in one painting' #yes i gave rose shivs haircolor. if we ever find out how she looks like and its not like this im just gonna pass away i guess #but yeah i hope yall connect the dots #i put waaay too much thought and work into this. i was googling pictures of all the actors as kids just for reference (sigh) #honestly kinda wanted to make tom and greg link pinkies as like. a pinkie promise. but that was too hard to draw in this angle #at least not without obstructing the view of the ring which is important to see so ya #my fave is actually the tomshiv wedding pic i went off with that. i love them... they should have run away to become sheep farmers fr fr #anyway im so glad im done with this UGH!! finally i can draw smth else without being like oh noooo i need to finish this #i see a lot of you wondering why there is no portrait of logan but one of ewan #it's bc the placement of the painting represent their standing. logans portray would not hang next to the stairs #his present portrait hangs at the end of it. all the way up at the top. alone and withering away #basically the picture you see underneath ewan to the right? its where toms parents would be. the right side of the wall is tom and gregs #and the left one is the roy siblings theirs. since they grew up rich rich. and tom and greg didn't #but ya thats why ewan hangs here and logan does not :)

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

world's longest staring contest GO-

#them. he??? wally plural <3 #how are they the same little man.... #looking between them in confusion so fast i get whiplash #one half of my brain: huh what huh what huh- #the other half: HOLY SHIT TWO WALLYS!!!!!! <3<3<3<3<3<3 #wait would it be wallys or wallies #fr what Is wally plural #existential questions we should all ask ourselves #scribble garnish #welcome home #welcome home puppet show #welcome home fanart #wally darling #i got a little lost in the Sauce making this & finished before realizing i didnt copy it over to a new larger canvas #& do the final layer/colors/bg there #so its a Little Bit Lower Resolution than id like #BUT HEY ITS NOT LIKE THATS EVER STOPPED ME BEFORE!!!! #whatever whatever doesnt matter its done and im satisfied with it #& i fuckin better be bc working on this killed my wrist lmfao #nearly dropped my stylus at one point from the sudden Oofie Ouchie #suffice to say i will be queuing this & then taking a day-long break from my hobbies #which are all hell on the wrist #which means i will probably leave the house out of sheer boredom #maybe ill watch spiderverse. go get a tasty Beverage. take a walk. summon the old gods if im in a silly goofy mood #just now realizing i probably drew wally too small #puppet wally. og wally light of my life. AHAHA OOPSIES TOO LATE TO FIX IT NOW 🥲👍

[reasonsforhope]

By the way, I would literally bet money that we're going to successfully keep global warming below 2 degrees celsius.

Would I bet my whole savings on it? No, not yet. But the way the data is trending, in two or three years, I very well might.

#good numbers keep going up at a rate that is drastically higher than expected #and that rate is going to keep increasing #metaphorically ofc I don't gamble with that kind of money lol #but seriously #I WOULD bet money that we will keep the increase under two degrees celsius #based on all the news and articles I've seen and all the research I've done #SHOUTOUT TO EXPONENTIAL CURVES #COME SAVE OUR ASSES EXPONENTIAL CURVES #lay translation of that is #not news #climate change #climate anxiety #me #climate hope #global warming

[o-ceti]

my beautiful twisted dark academia wraps

#march 2023 edit: i made this post + caption before kanye wests descent into like full weird nazism so jsyk probably would not have done that #post-all of that 😐 sorry

[intotheelliwoods]

Here it is, the 2 Arms Left Collaboration Comic!

Big thank you to everyone who participated! This was such a cool project! There was so much talent put into this thing and I am amazed by the results

Enjoy the finished product everyone!

=-=-=-=-=-

=-=-=-=-=-

The wonderful artists, in order of their panels appearance, go check them out!!

To help count without eyes getting lost, the people highlighted in orange were a part of the black and white flashback sequence!

1 @tangledinink

2 @roquog

3 @sunnyyyteaaa Sun!

4 @apollo-not-in-space

5 @wraenata

6 @abbeyofcyn

7 @dianagj-art

8 @rbtlvr

9 @vangh17a

10 @avidlylivid

11 @butterfilledpockets

12 @thegunnsara

13 @manga-toons

14 @idiot-mushroom

15 @centerofleesmind

16 @sunnyyyteaaa Tea!

17 @volcanicsleep

18 @phykoha

19 @princesskkfish

20 @cokowiii

21 @y0unginhumans

22 @bluesgras

23 @karmacomesaround

24 @heckitall

25 @sad-leon

26 @blue-star-doodles

27 @teainthesnow

28 @cartoonhostage

29 @hatchi-matchii

30 @last-hourglass

#2 arms left #rottmnt #to the artists who worked on this: #now that the comic itself is posted #feel free to post your individual panels separately if you would like <3 #I cannot take all the credit here aa! #I dont think anything like this has been done before #definitely a first omg #definitely an experiment if nothing else #a very fun one though! #cw blood #tw blood

[nerdpoe]

Damian has been partnered up with Daniel in their Home Ec final.

And Daniel...is putting no effort at all into cooking.

Damian keeps trying to convince him to help, but Daniel keeps wriggling his way out of the responsibility.

Damian ends up having to handle the Turkey! Unacceptable! He does not condone the death of animals for food unless it is for survival! This part must be handled by Daniel.

He shoves the turkey in Daniels' hands.

There's a soft green glow.

He hears Daniel whisper a horrified "oh shit no".

And the very dead turkey that they were supposed to be cooking comes to life.

It is very, very angry.

#dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc #dc x dp #story prompt #phanfic #after it's all said and done damian scolds danny for not telling him about his meta handicap #danny is just too embarrassed #he gets removed from home ec the next day #apparently the principal hadn't believed him when he told them what would happen if he handled dead animals #they believe him now #crack fic

[the-rainbow-of-doom]

(This post was sponsored by a 1+ hour commute)

#I'm so frustrated how little time and energy i have after a day is done #i didn't win the fight against depression to have lofe ruined by THAT now #lacking time and energy to go on job hunt.. it's all very small steps only #a part time job would be marvellous but what flat can be paid with that #maybe also my anxiety is stopping me from getting a new job. what if i get fired. what if it's horrible there. ahh.. i need more courage #mine capitalism #anti-capitalism #work

[lazylittledragon]

happy gay month :3

#stranger things #steddie #eddie munson #steve harrington #pride #sponsored by my endless brainrot #also if you know where the text is from without googling we can get married right now #fun fact! would not recommend drinking 2 mojitos while trying to draw #because you will hate it right up until it's done #edit: i. just realised eddie's shirt is basically the same as the one i made last year and wear all the time whOOPS

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 102

 Bruce pinched the bridge of his nose, taking a deep breath. In for ten seconds, out for eight. Alright. Okay. “Let me get this straight,” he didn’t motion to the three teens- or not teens even if two apparently looked like they were- but it was a close thing. “You-” 

 Phantom perked up, white hair flickering with what he was pretty sure were stars as they turned away from the window looking out into space. “-are two years old.” The fae-esque being who looked more like a fourteen year old gave a half-distracted nod. Which, for a toddler, they were paying attention pretty well. 

 “You-” Klarion looked up from where he was fiddling with the cuffs that had been on him, cat sprawled on his shoulder now that it was out of the carrier. “-are six?” Another distracted nod, the apparently-child seemingly enamored with the sounds the cuffs made when they clinked together. 

  “And you-” He turned towards Marvel, who shrank back before seemingly steeling themself. “-are in fact ten.” The… well they had thought demigod but apparently all three were some sort of realms-being, which had apparently made Constantine pale and start cursing before stomping out of the Watchtower. Another nod and shaky thumbs up. 

 Alright. Okay. They had in fact let a ten-year old join the league, which wouldn’t have been so bad if they had known. Especially the fact that apparently Marvel was only half-human, which suddenly explained so much about how he didn’t know so many things about a human life. Which-

 “You,” he turned towards Phantom again to make sure he was listening before returning his attention to Marvel. “And you have both lived at least a year in the human realm with human companions, but your-” He turned his gaze towards the ravenette in the center. The six year old apparently. “-experience with the human realm is literally just with the Light.” 

 Yet another distracted nod. Okay. Bruce was tempted to scream in a room for the entire situation that had cropped up from the single action of taking Klarion’s familiar and then the boy himself into custody. Then again, it was honestly a much better thing they had apparently caught this. 

 “Alright,” he sighed, suddenly feeling incredibly exhausted. “To make sure I have all of this correct-” Because it was already a shitshow and the amount of shouting had absolutely spooked the child. To the point he’d- according to Marvel- made what was apparently some sort of very distressed noise that had made both him and Phantom running. Or rather flying and portaling. 

 “-in the realms, people there make friends through fighting,” Bruce pauses to make sure he got that part correct. The origin of this entire misunderstanding with the chaos-lord. Lordling? 

 All three nodded, Klarion losing interest in the cuffs and starting to pet his cat. Familiar. Everyone had referred to it as a familiar and Marvel had appeared utterly horrified that they had taken said familiar away. Somehow he was the one the trio were currently trusting and weren’t doing the same towards any of the other league members. 

 “And you have been trying to make friends with the Jr team, which they have been taking as an attack due to this miscommunication.” Honestly they should have gotten more information, though he couldn’t exactly blame any of the teens, what with everything they were currently dealing with. 

 “... is there any sort of guardian or something you might have, that can be contacted? Or anyone that could help prevent a situation like this from happening again?” All three avoided his eyes, suddenly finding things like the table and walls very interesting. 

 Oh. Hm. This could be a problem.

#dcxdp #dpxdc #prompts #Bruce is so done #Danny: I would have a guardian but the observants locked him up in his clocktower 'cause he used to date the king #Marvel: Does Tawny count?? Like he's a tiger but he also talks and is sapient... #Klarion: Mother Chaos is busy so dropped me off in this world to play #Bruce: Oh no #Bruce already filling out temporary custody papers: Oh No #Bruce: Do any of you know how to do human things #Danny: Oh my human caretakers were mad scientists- #Bruce: OH NO #Marvel: Oh when I'm smaller the street kids help me out #Bruce grabbing a blanket: OH NO #Klarion: I am doing good at being human a completely normal thing to want a good grade in #Bruce already bundling them up: OH NO #They all have familiars lmao #Klarion has Teekl the cat #Danny has Cujo the dog #Billy has Tawny the tiger #JL in the other room having a breakdown or five #Why yes they were fighting a literal child #And yes apparently they did let in another child and literal toddler #Danny: Hold on can I at least get my sister before we go anywhere #Bruce: Hnnnn #His kids are going to laugh at him for bringing home 4 kids

[mangomybeloved]

i hate to say it, like i love watcher, but my thoughts on them leaving youtube is this is too much too soon, like the bulk of their fans are probs younger/unable to afford another subscription fee, plus youtube has always been where they've been?? it's just so stark to go from this being the site you put your content on for years and then to go full cold turkey, no more posting on youtube ever

and i'll be honest, they don't have enough content to warrant a separate site/subscription all together. dropout is able to pull it off because they have the full rotation of shows and cast as well (dnd, game changer, etc), whereas for watcher, they only have a few couple really successful shows and those are primarily only focused on ryan and shane.

and tbh, i don't think they have a big enough audience to launch it either, like their marketing team could do better on advertising their shows! like, i haven't been keeping up with their recent shows cause either i don't see it on my youtube algorithm at all or i have to go out of my way to go see it.

and i don't know this just feels like a kick to the face to their fans, like even dropout has shorts on youtube and keeps up all their content on youtube like some episodes and the entirety of season one of fantasy high, and now i'm seeing in the comments, that their international fans outside of the usa won't even able to subscribe cause of how payment works which is :///, so yeah, watcher, it's been nice knowing ya, but i don't know how this move will turn out for you, i'm sorry to say

#watcher #luna.txt #man this friday is a shit day to be a fan of anything first yuri on ice and now this #i was so excited to see what today's news would be and this is so shitty #like i dont understand why they dont stick to the youtube and patreon format??? #it doesnt make much sense to me #and ill say i say all this as a subscriber of dropout like dropout has such a variety of shows and cast its worth it to me to pay the $6 #but for watcher???? ehhhhh not so much ill be fr i only watch their cooking shows or puppet history #and well since they havent done either of those in a while? and now theyre doing this? im out

[egophiliac]

something quick to relieve the tension of these final hours ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

close-up, 'cause it got kinda lost in resizing:

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #i have been staring at this too long and have no idea what it looks like #but i only have a limited amount of time to post it in now oh gosh #(just as a warning i might turn the old inbox off tonight) #(just in case!) #(because while i would love to stay up until 3 am to play it immediately...alas. adult life makes fools of us all.) #(you will know when i'm done because my screaming will be audible throughout the world) #eyestrain

[elitadream]

Getting ready for a special event~ 😉🕺

#In this case: New Year's Eve! ^o^🎉 #Who else wants to see Luigi and Toadsworth play matchmakers? 😏 #I feel like these two would get along really well honestly 🤭 #Often chatting about Mario and Peach... Subtly trying to move things along at the castle lol #Not to mock our lovebirds but- #they do need all the help they can get xD #I had imagined that Peach would once tell Luigi about her secret wish to attend a fancy party with Mario #And this wouldn't fall on deaf ears ;D 💕 #Cue Mario being dragged into a dressing room and wondering why he's having his measurements taken all of a sudden #Feeling very clueless about it all but confusedly following royal fashion protocol regardless 😂 #He doesn't know it's done with the sole purpose of him matching with the princess for the occasion #Although Toadsworth's statement assuredly gave him a clue; and one can only assume he blushed very noticeably at that! 😆 #Mario #Luigi #Toadsworth #Princess Peach #Mareach (implied) #Mario x Peach #romance #shenanigans #conspiring wingmen #party #Super Mario bros #fanart

[fandom-geek]

i think the thing that really gets me about pre-canon durge is their absolute sense of duty, and their utter isolation outside of the cult of bhaal.

most of the cultists seem eager to see durge upon their return, and one even says they were the first to feed him flesh. gortash tells them of an exhibition of a bhaalspawn's corpse and another bhaalspawn's creations and durge immediately plans to attack the hall of wonder to recover them. they then apparently entrust said bhaalspawn's corpse to sceleritas fel to "restore" through taxidermy. they deride orin for her artistry with corpses explicitly because "bhaal will never care" and because orin "[does] not understand lord bhaal".

even their infamous prayer for forgiveness is framed around their absolute submission to bhaal's plans, and the crime that requires forgiveness? admiring his rival's chosen. that's one line, and the next three paragraphs are swearing to carry out his plan exactly as they've been told to, all for his forgiveness.

hell, even their room reinforces this. orin has barely touched the place aside from installing her mother's corpse and her manifesto - and that is some of the only decoration. what was it before orin, an empty room with skulls, a bed, a desk, some chests and a wardrobe?

the durge didn't have any semblance of a life outside of bhaal, aside from gortash. and is it any surprise? the only other hint they ever had a life outside of the cult is the flashback of kid durge murdering their adopted family, all thanks to their father's urging.

bhaal even tries to force them back into isolation after they've been tadpoled by forcing them to kill alfira, and then trying to force a durge who resists him to kill their lover. if they continue resisting, bhaal kills them. bhaal will not allow them to have a life outside of him and, if it weren't for jergal, he would've succeeded.

#bg3 spoilers #the dark urge #honestly writing this all out it's weird that bhaal doesn't try to kill your party when you're at the temple #it'd be perfectly in line with everything else he'd done to durge up until that moment #also just makes me think of how sceleritas will tell an evil durge that the worst thing they've ever done #is giving a beggar a coin without asking for anything in return #ymmv and everyone has their own headcanons but pre canon durge was not a happy or enthusiastic participant as far as canon shows #which is reinforced by gortash saying you've always been better at controlling your urges than orin! #why would durge bother to do that when 'all father wants is death in droves death in numbers'! #honestly i think it's v reasonable to think that durge could've been tempted into bane worship given what little we know of them pre canon #anyway haven't played evil durge myself so very curious abt any insights from that route #baldur's gate