#Taako ​be easy on Barold

[noodyl-blasstal]

Blupjeans Week: Bet (day 2)

It's @blupjeansweek day 2. This follows on from yesterday's prompt. You can also read on Ao3

-

"It's going to be fine."

"Easy for you to say, you just casually revolutionised thermodynamics, you're gonna walk your viva." Barry could hear Lup rolling her eyes at that one, though he stayed resolutely focused on the raggedy copy of his thesis which was, at this point, 70% sticky notes. Could he read what any of them said because of how much they overlapped? Shut up.

"Natch, evocation is never going to be the same thanks to cha'girl's research, but that doesn't meant you're going to fail, Barold."

"No, they're just going to MPhil me out."

Lup sighed heavily. "Oh no, you worked hard and gained mastery in a subject, how terrible, what an embarrassment."

Barry did look up then, didn't she get it? He’d thought she’d get it. It was an embarrassment! She’d watched him put so much into this, the stupid well thumbed, badly bound paper stack represented four years of late nights, early mornings, cancelled plans, 3am anxiety… he thought she understood. She’d lived it with him, they were working for the key to the next level, if they gave him the wrong one what was even the point? "You think…?"

"I'm being flippant because that's not going to happen. Once again, I've read your work my guy, it's good, in fact, it’s great. In fact, right now, you’re arguing with established fact.” Barry grimaced as Lup spoke, but she ploughed on. “... you've already published three chapters of this thing in peer reviewed journals. 6/6 esteemed peer reviewers agree!"

"But they publish bad science all the tim…"

Lup cut him off. "Barry stop. You know you’ve done good science because a) I would have told you if you hadn’t, and b) peer reviewers might be lazy but you’re not. You know your submissions were solid, just look at the citations.”

“But…” She was right. But Barry still struggled, sure she hadn’t said anything incorrect, he knew he’d done solid work, but he also just knew that he’d fucked this up.

“...But what? But maybe they're idiots who can't recognise genius? They're gonna recognise it, Barry. It's impossible not to recognise how brilliant you are. That thesis is just you yelling “I’m Barry Bluejeans and I know what the fuck I’m talking about, pay me money about it.” Plus, publish a few more chapters and you can do PhD by publication without those losers to worry about anyway."

Barry didn’t even register the second part because Lup thought he was brilliant! Lup thought he was brilliant and she was telling him and he kept shutting her down instead of just being grateful about it. Maybe if he tried to accept the compliment. "Than…"

Lup started speaking at the same time. "In fact…" She paused to let him speak, but he shook his head and gestured to her, he could try being gracious another day. "... Okay, if you're sure." He nodded. "I think, Baraldo, that we should make a bet, you and I. I may as well profit from all this self doubt, so I bet you're gonna pass with no corrections."

Barry laughed bitterly. Whatever she was betting she'd be losing. "Lup, I'm going to fail."

Lup shoved his shoulder gently. "You're not and you know it. Be serious."

"Oh, like yours was serious?"

Lup's ears flicked back defensively. "Serious? Barry, c'mon. Obviously we all know cha’girl’s out here shaping the future of evocation, but you're doing magic within magic on all your spooktacular stuff. The chapter on spell wheels? I'd never considered it, and even if I had, I definitely would have taken at least 10 minutes longer than you to come up with something so elegant. You know what you're doing, I know what I'm doing, it's why we're such a great team."

They did make a great team. They’d met the first day of undergrad at orientation. Barry the lone mature student in a sea of babies, then Lup and Taako had appeared, and sure there was The Nerd Incident, but they cleared that pretty fast. They coincided in most classes, worked together in labs, and powered their way through a ridiculous amount of higher education together. There hadn’t been any question about it when the option of choosing housing came up, they lived together off campus and were joined by a rotating cast which had pretty much always featured Taako (well, until this year), but LupAndBarry, BarryAndLup? They were a constant, they worked. “We do work well together.” 

“You can say that again.” Lup glared at him as he opened his mouth to repeat it. “...And you know exactly how smart I am, right?” Lup asked. Barry could taste the trap-ness of this question, she was an angler fish and the question was a beautiful little light, he was going to answer it honestly and wholly and she was going to chomp him down with her big clever teeth.

“You’re incredible Lup, your research is amazing and you’re passionate and eloquent and so smart…” 

Lup’s teeth closed. “Then you know I know my shit well enough to know your shit’s good, so, what’s your bet?”

“I pass with major corrections?”

Lup raised an eyebrow. “Question, or an answer?”

“I pass with majors.”

“Fine. If you want to lose whatever you’re betting then be my guest, Bluejeans.”

“I don’t think I have anything you want.” Barry said, and he wasn’t sure, it was a ridiculous thought, but he could have sworn that Lup’s ears reddened at the tips. She coughed loudly, then almost shouted “Jeans.”

“What?”

Lup coughed again and spoke in a softer tone. “I get rights to your wardrobe. I know your jeans are comfier than mine.”

Barry hesitated. He’d already lost a good chunk of his shirts and sweaters to Lup. Not that he minded most of the time, he usually managed to steal his favourites back briefly on laundry day, but his jeans? He only had three pairs and they all served specific purposes in his life, he couldn't afford to sacrifice them, no matter how cute Lup would look in them. But, <;i>but</i>, there was no way he was actually going to pass without corrections, everyone at least got minors and Barry's supervisor definitely didn't think he'd even manage that. According to the available evidence, this seemed like a safe bet. "Deal!"

Lup grinned big and wide and dangerous . "GuyWhoJustLostHisJeansSaysWhat."

"What?" Barry asked.

Lup snickered. "Just asking what you wanted from me if your externals are somehow struck incapable of recognising brilliance?"

Oh... yeah, Barry had forgotten this part. Lup's brash overconfidence in his abilities had essentially signed her up to do whatever he wanted. He could stick her with dish duty for the next hundred years; make her actually use the dregs of her body wash before she moved onto the next one so the edge of the shower wasn't a terrifying pile of upside down barely balanced bottles; he could ask her to tell him whether there was an expiration date on their whole thing, whether the end of study meant different directions and fond memories, phone calls which dwindled as she remembered less and less… "You have to come home with me." He blurted out the thought before he could properly consider what he was asking. Was that too much? Oh it was probably too much. A trip home meant a road trip, motels, meeting his Mum. There was no way Marlena wouldn't pick up on exactly how he felt about Lup, not that she hadn’t already, but it was easier to lie on the phone. Plus, there was no way his Mum wouldn't love Lup too. How could anyone not? Then he’d only disappoint her when Lup moved on with her life and left him behind. Maybe he could back track, do the dishes thing instead…

"You have yourself a deal, Mr Bluejeans, may as well use that title one last time. Now, I have some outfits to plan, go eat the sandwich I made you, then I'll help with the last minute prep." Lup disappeared in the direction of Barry's room. 

Barry resigned himself to losing another few shirts while Lup investigated his wardrobe and obediently shuffled his way to the kitchen. It was definitely time to eat, he wasn't entirely sure when he last did… probably the last time Lup shoved food at him. He definitely had to thank her when this was over. 

-

"...And why did you decide on Necrostics?" Lup looked expectantly at Barry. 

"It was the most logical methodological approach as it incorporates acknowledgement of the agency held by constructs and the undead while also acknowledging the influence of social and summoning factors. I modified the approach to ensure it was appropriately controlling for the new spells I developed."

Lup clapped her hands delightedly. 

"It was that good an answer?" Barry asked.

"It's that good a wardrobe. I cannot wait to get my hands on it, Barold, you're gonna be living in your pants… although…" Lup narrowed her eyes. 

"Absolutely not, no!"

Lup shrugged. "You can't watch your stuff all the time, Barry. Cha'girl needs some new sleep shorts."

Barry felt his face flame at the thought of Lup sleeping in his clothes, Lup wanting to. "I'd better go now!" He said, too fast and too loud. "Gotta go get it over with."

Lup jumped up. "Cool, I'll grab my book and and few other bits and come with. There's some comfy chairs in the corridor with my name on them."

Oh. Lup was going to come with him. Lup was going to wait for him. "You don't have t…"

"I want to."

–

"Good luck Barold, you've got this." Lup hugged him firmly, he squeezed back. If he didn't let go he didn't have to go into the scary room. Can't defend your thesis if you’re in the middle of a hug, that’s just science. Lup pulled back slightly, then dipped her head to kiss him on the cheek.

Barry didn't have time to react before Lup pulled away and planted herself across the corridor chairs, head buried in her book.

"Are you ready, Mr Bluejeans?" A voice asked from the door behind him. All Barry could do was touch a hand to his cheek, turn, and nod. 

– 

"Congratulations again, Dr Bluejeans, this may be the most enjoyable viva I have ever taken part in." Said Dr Combish, opening the door for him. 

Barry was going to pass out. The adrenaline finally drained out of him, weeks, months of panic, gone. It was over. An outright pass? It was so rare, so ridiculously unlikely. He should be raring to celebrate, but mostly he just wanted to go home and sit very still in the dark. He stepped into the corridor, remembered to thank Dr Combish, and stared numbly at the door as it closed. What did he even do now? It was over. A whole chunk of his life was just… done. He had the keys to the next stage, had the fancy title, had everything he'd worked for and… and? 

"Hey Bear?" Lup nudged his arm gently. "How'd it go?" 

"I… I passed?" Said Barry. "Yeah. They. Well. I passed!" His voice broke momentarily, to say it was so surreal. "Lup! I passed!!!" He grabbed her into a hug. "I did it! We did it! Thank you, thank you thank you thank you!"

"Knew you could." Lup said thickly, hugging him back. They didn’t say anything for a while, just held on tight. “We… we should do something.” Said Lup, eventually. “Celebrate, you know.”

“We’ll celebrate together when you pass next week.” Barry didn’t even have to think about it. Whatever he could do, Lup could do better, there was no way she’d be correcting anything.

“Fine, but we’re getting pizza, from the good place.” Lup grabbed her backpack from the chairs.

Barry stared for a second. “You… you’re wearing my garden jeans. Lup!”

“And they look great on me. Told you I believed in you. Fair’s fair.” Lup winked, wiggled her butt, and grabbed his hand. “Now, let’s get you home, Baraldo. We need to ring Marlena and tell her, she’ll be having kittens.”

Barry couldn’t do anything but nod.

#blupjeansweek2023 #Barry you idiot; see how smart you are! #Lup grabbed those jeans so fast - she's been secretly wearing them for years but now she doesn't have to hide it anymore #Noodyl Writes #TAZ fic #The Adventure Zone #Blupjeans #Barry Bluejeans #Lup Tacco #Lup

[herbgerblin]

your art trademark is the intricate and elegant art in the foreground with the chibi :3 characters in the background

khoshekh42 asked: Not a trademark for all of your art, but every time i see a >:3 in an art, i think of you

Edit: Accidentally posted this without my response oops!

I realize I do this with lup more often than with taako. Partly because I draw taako very :>!!! while lup is :3!!!

But to the detailed foreground art thing, I do it like that because it's like the establishing shot in a scene. It does the visual heavy lifting while the rest of the sequence carries on with the story.

toobaornottooba asked: For the art ask thing!! The way you do wrinkles around mouths and eyes and the palletes you typically work in are very recognizable to me!! Plus when you do the more simplified eyes that are right in between winnie the pooh and Scooby-Doo its so appealing and scrumptious!!

I also realize I do the simplified eyes a lot with barold because he is so shaped. He's very easy to draw. And so I don't have to fight with drawing his glasses around his eyes (we find shortcuts in this house.)

#art meme #askherbgerb

[guthrie-odonto]

Barry: *venting to Taako about not knowing what to get Lup for their anniversary or her birthday or whatever*

Taako: ... *looks up from phone/new stone of farspeech that’s basically a phone/idk* wait, who?

Barry: ALSKDKJDKDKDHSKSJ-*falls over and has a complete and utter conniption fit*

Taako: Sorry, I wasn’t listening; who were you just talking about?

Barry: D8 D8 D8... *slowly crawls up to Taako, grabbing his collar or whatever and wheezing*

Barry: N̷̢̟̹̭͋E̶͙͎̱̮̹̅͛̇̀͗͐V̸̡͉͈͍̿̿E̸̛͙̜̿̈͝Ṛ̸̡̣͙̼͙̈́̒ ̷̪̥͙̐̓͝S̸͈̦͈͎̰̙̄Ǎ̵̰̑Y̴͉̆̈ ̶̥̬̿̀̿̊̈T̸̳̳̐͆̋H̷̨̰̱͚̓͆̈́̈́A̵̠͉̜͔͕͑̔͠T̶̛̪́̽ ̶̢͔̦̯̻̋̏̎̕͜͠W̷̔̅́͜͝Ö̴̧̗͇̦̼̤́̂̀͝Ȑ̶͙̱̦̖̊́̉̑D̴͈͉̤͍͊̈̋̿̾͝ ̶͎̠̰̭̅̅̅̿̕W̶͎̞͖͂͜H̴̛̭̘̖̞͓̗͋͒É̶̪͍̠̂Ṉ̸̽͊̉́̕ ̵͈̱̫̣̯̇I̷̥͈̺̾̈́͋͋ ̸̧̟͊̀͘Ą̸̫̦͋̂̕M̸̨͓̳͎̌͂̽̇̚ ̷̬͂̓́͜T̵̙̃̎̾̎͝͝Ã̴̢̲̱̘͈̒̐̇͝L̸̨̯͓͛̏̕͝͝K̸̝̤̱̓͗Ĭ̴͎͓̲̼ͅN̸̤̖͊̉̉̚G̶̻͖͓̮̹͛͠ ̴̨̭͒͜A̵̙͚̖͑̔͒͌B̷͔̤̩͖͖́ͅO̵͚̳͊͌̿͒̈̈́Ų̵̜͐̒̑T̶̡̛̲͇̀͌̇̏͋ ̷̜̺͖̐͒̉̆́Ļ̵̱͎̀͒͊U̷̧͉̜͙̠̜̐́P̴͖̟̟̬̜̞̋̿̃͒͘ ̴̭̓̈͘͘E̵̼͙̮̫̗͛̔̔V̶̧̥̹͊͊̚͝ͅE̵͕͉͌̋͑̈̉R̴̨̭͕͚̼͚̆͑͗̀͝ ̶̢̮̬̐Ȧ̴̩̏̌̅͘G̸̗̥̓Ä̵̳́̊͋̂Ï̸̧̨̨͚̻͛̾̈́̓͝Ņ̵̻̠͇͈̒͒.̴̢̤̺͉͙͓͆

(edit: a blow to the fandom so fine I added visuals)

#Taako ​be easy on Barold #he doesn’t have the happiest memories of the last time he was talking about your sister and you asked ‘who?’ #the adventure zone #taz balance #taako #barry bluejeans #amber's post

[fortunefavorsthebrave-dude]

what if i just. cosplay homestuck again.

#sky speaks #'i'm done being homestuck' i say every year before doing it again #but i also already have the stuff for it and i don't wanna make anything new for ichi #i know i'm gonna be barold on friday but have nothing for the other two days #other than like. wearing mags again or somethin #OH WAIT #CAN I BE TAAKO THIS TIME #HEY DAN IF YOU SEE THIS CAN I BE TAAKO SUNDAY #I WANNA B THE TRASHMAN #i don't own like. nice clothes tho lmao #and then like. god. #i guess maybe homestuck saturday?? #or if i figure out a ygo kid that would be easy to throw together #just duel disk it all day fuck yeah

[holdmecloser-gandydancer]

team bonding

Taako dropped down onto the couch next to Lup and immediately draped his legs over her lap. He snorted to himself when he saw that one human on the team—Barney, he thought—look over at Lup with a soft, kinda goopy look. Gods above, the mission hadn’t even started and he couldn’t wait for it to be over.

The rest of the team slowly shuffled into the living area. The Institute had insisted on the seven of them all living in a shared apartment for the month leading up to the mission. Something about making sure the bond engine had enough fuel. Taako kinda thought that’s what the three months of training they’d been doing was for but hey, he wasn’t the expert on bond propulsion.

He scooted over slightly to give Lucretia a little more room to perch on the arm of the couch. Magnus sat on the floor, reclining slightly, and looking relaxed. Barclay (certainly that’s not his name, right? It’s been three months, he’s gotta get this. Barold? That’s not a name, Taako thought. It’s his name now, he decided after another moment of thought) leaned against the wall and glanced around the room. Merle commandeered the easy chair in the corner. Captain Davenport stood in front of the group, seemingly ready to give them all yet another rousing speech on the importance of their mission and of the importance of bonding during this time, yadda, yadda, yadda.

It wasn’t that Taako didn’t take the mission seriously, he just thought that everyone else seemed to take it a bit too seriously. He and Lup could probably power the bond engine by themselves, what good did it do making all of them live together for an extra month? Somehow he figured that being exposed to Merle’s snoring for an extra 30 days wouldn’t exactly improve group morale. It had barely been three days and Taako was ready to cast Mending on the dwarf’s entire respiratory system.

“Okay everyone, I think our flight simulation today went really well. I know we’re still hitting a few snags but I know that these next few weeks are really going to solidify us into a real team!” Davenport said, bouncing his gaze across the room. “Now, I think there are a couple more bonding exercises that have bee –“

Lup’s hand shoots into the air as she interrupts. “Hey, Dav, I wanted to circle back to what I asked in my interview.”

“Uh, you asked a lot of things in your interview, Lup. Remind me what you’re talking about?”

“Well, if we’re going to be a team, are we going to have some sick team uniforms?”

“Oh, she does raise a good point, Cap,” Taako said, lolling his head to give Davenport his full attention.

Davenport frowned and looked around. “There’s…there’s only seven of us,” he said slowly. “Do we really need uniforms?”

“I mean, nobody needs uniforms, they’re just cool,” Lup said, crossing her arms.

“What kinda uniforms are we talking? Because I think some matching coveralls might look cool,” Magnus said, suddenly seeming a little more interested in the conversation.

“Absolutely not, coveralls are far too utilitarian for me. What about some sick jackets? Like, ooh like some nice satin bomber jackets with ‘IPRE’ embroidered on the back?” Taako suggested, sitting up to engage in the conversation.

“Nah, what if we get capes? We’d look so badass with some capes!” Merle said, looking over at Magnus for support.

“I personally am vetoing capes, I think we’d all look ridiculous,” Davenport said, sitting down on the coffee table.

“Um, what about lab coats? Since we’re all scientists?”

“Speak for yourself, Barry!” Magnus said, shaking his head.

Barry, that’s it, Taako thought to himself.

“I think it’d be illegal if you put me in a lab coat,” Magnus continued, scooting closer to the circle that was forming.

“What about robes?”

Six heads swiveled to look at Lucretia, who blushed slightly at the sudden focus.

“Well, it feels very magicky but it’s also just kinda cool for those who either don’t do magic,” Lucretia motioned towards Magnus, who grinned. “Or those of us who don’t do it that often.”

“See, I like the idea of robes but I gotta say, I don’t know that I’d love driving in a robe. I feel like a jacket could be nice,” Davenport said with a shrug.

“Maybe a kind of military style jacket? Something with some cool pockets?” Merle offered.

“Hey, wait a minute,” Taako interrupted abruptly, putting a hand up. The other six looked at him quizzically. “Why can’t we just get both? Like I know that Captain and meathead might both feel a little better in jackets but I also know that me, Lup, and Bluejeans over there would rock some super spooky robes. But also, cha’boy wants options.”

Davenport seemed to mull this over for a moment. “We could probably find it in the budget…” he murmured aloud, the end of his tail twitching in thought. “Yeah, okay let’s try to get both!”

“What color?” Lucretia asked, a small smile forming on her face.

“Well, the official color palette of the Institute is ivory –“

“Oh definitely not any shade of white, please,” Barry interjected.

“Obsidian –“

“Boring!” Lup called out, laying back against the couch.

“Mauve, which I am personally opposed to. And crimson.”

“Crimson is mighty cool,” Taako relented, nodding at the rest of the group. Slowly, everyone began to nod.

Davenport smiled wide; he wasn’t prepared for this conversation but he had a feeling it’d have good consequences for the engine. “Alright, I’ll be sure to get us some red robes and jackets. Now, Barry, I think tonight’s your turn to cook?”

“Oh please gods no, I saw this man burn oatmeal this morning,” Lup blurted out. She sent Barry a meek, almost apologetic look. “No offense, dude.”

He shrugged and smiled, a gentle blush kissing his cheeks. “None taken.”

“Lup and I have a recipe for a real good soup. Everyone fall in, wash your hands, and get ready to cut a shit load of onions.” Taako stood up and waved everyone into the kitchen. Normally he hated other people in the kitchen with him, but he figured it probably couldn’t hurt to get that bond shit going while they all had time.

#taz #taz balance #tazb #ipre #taz fic #reese writes #the adventure zone #i just wanted to think about how they got their silly little robes!

[kravkalackin]

To say they were still figuring this out was an understatement if there ever was one. They’d been in this new world for a little over six months now, by their last count. There was still no sign of their planet, their universe, the whole damn planar system they left behind, and no sign if they would ever be able to leave this one. 

Maybe they wouldn’t. Maybe they would be stuck here in this strange animal filled world for the rest of their lives. At least the animals were sapient, but there was still something surreal about possibly never seeing another humanoid face again, other than his six coworkers. 

It would also be an understatement to say it sometimes kept him up at night. Which was why Barry was currently moving as quietly as he could through the ship to the kitchen. Davenport and Merle were still out on a mission to find the light, but everyone else should be asleep. 

The key word there was ‘should.’ 

“Oh,” he said, surprised when he saw the form of one of the twins from behind. It was hard to tell in the dark, especially with the way they were backlit from the fridge. “Couldn’t sleep either?” he asked, and when they turned to look at him he could see now that it was Taako. 

Instead of answering, he wordlessly pointed towards one of his ears, which twitched before turning back towards the fridge, and Barry could feel himself dying inside. 

“Right. Elf, sorry,” he said, debating just heading back to his room before he embarrassed himself further. He really hadn’t spent a lot of time with either of the twins on their own, and most of the time they did spend together was in study. Learning this new animal language, trying to figure out this world they were in. He wasn’t that great at social skills there, but at least he had something to focus on.

“What’cha having my dude?” Taako asked before he could leave, surprising Barry. 

“What?” he asked, and it was almost impossible to tell what Taako was thinking. 

 “Food Barold, were you coming here to eat something or just real in the mood for some awkward small talk,” he clarified. 

“Oh, I was just gonna grab some mac n’ cheese or something,” he said, and almost as soon as he said that Taako started moving, pulling out the ingredients to make some homemade mac, instead of the instant stuff Barry was planning on. “Oh you don’t- I can do it bud,” he said, but Taako waved him away. 

“I couldn’t decide anyway. I’ll just make double,” he said, and reluctantly Barry nodded, going and sitting down at the table to wait. 

“It’s uh, it’s weird, isn’t it?” he said after a few minutes, the quiet getting a little too much for him. 

“Which part?” Taako asked, and Barry scoffed a little at that. 

“All of it? It’s just- I’d been prepared for a disaster, but nothing like this,” he said, and all Taako did was nod. At the moment he just seemed to be watching water boil, which in Barry’s experience only made it go all that much slower. “Do you think... you think we’ll ever be able to go home?” he asked, his voice quiet. 

“Dunno,” Taako said easily, a careless shrug on his shoulders. “Having only animals around forever is kinda a weird turn, but never much had a home to begin with, so if we’re stuck here so be it, I guess,” he said. 

“Right, I uh, remember hearing your guy’s story, in the promotional stuff,” Barry said, hoping he wasn’t crossing some line. It didn’t seem to bother Taako though, who started working on some sort of cheese sauce for the mac now that the noodles had been added. It had been pretty heavily advertised though, the twin elves who’d brought themselves up from nothing. A regular rags to riches story, with the skills to actually back it up. 

“And what’s your story?” Taako asked, surprising Barry. “From everything I remember you were sitting pretty easy in the IPRE, never did any sort of field work like this before. Why not stick back on this one too?” he asked, and it wasn’t the first time Barry had been asked that, but it was the first time he felt the desire to answer honestly. 

“Midlife crisis,” he said, Taako pausing and turning towards him slowly in response. “I realized I’m almost forty and it just felt like I’d... wasted so much time? Then the light came down and I told myself wherever this thing takes us, I was gonna follow it, so uh, here I am,” he said. 

Taako was quiet for a long moment, and Barry was worried that he might have said something wrong when he suddenly started laughing. Barry could feel his face heat up in embarrassment, but when the elf pulled himself together it actually didn’t seem mocking. 

“Ya know what, I can respect that,” he said, and Barry actually found himself grinning as Taako came over, putting a bowl of the best looking mac n’ cheese Barry had ever seen in his life down in front of him, before sitting down as well with his own. Barry didn’t waste any time, immediately shoveling some in his mouth. To say they got lucky with the twin’s cooking couldn’t begin to cover it. 

“Gods, this is gonna fuck me up tonight, but it’s worth it,” he said, not noticing how Taako froze at that. 

“What do you mean?” he asked, and Barry was confused for a moment before remembering only Merle had access to their medical records. 

“Oh, I’m lactose intolerant,” he said. 

“Barold!” Taako screeched, and immediately Barry was wincing. 

“Shush! You’ll wake everyone else up!” he hissed back, having to quickly grab his bowl when the elf started reaching for it. 

“Give me that back! I’m not letting you midlife crisis all over my cooking!” he yelled, and Barry had to get up out of his seat now, shoving food in his mouth as fast as he could before Taako could take it away. 

“The damage is already done! I’m finishing it!” he shouted, running away from Taako now. There was a loud clatter as Taako’s chair fell back, and Barry was pretty sure he could hear others starting to wake up from the noise further into the ship. 

There was still so much they had to figure out, so many uncertainties, but hopefully slowly they could start piecing it together. 

And as far as people to be stuck with for all of this, Barry was starting to feel like he got pretty lucky. 

There were definitely worse ways to have a midlife crisis, at any rate. 

#taz #the adventure zone #barry bluejeans #taako #long post #i just enjoy their unlikely wholesome friendship #haven't gotten to write it in a while #so here are the boys

[theassthatquits]

Blupjeans Week Day Four: Ship

@blupjeansweek2021

Lup sipped her drink slowly, taking in the scene around her. There were definitely a lot more men here than women, which meant that more attention would be placed on her. She could work with that. She thumbed through the many name tags she swiped and started writing a different name on each one and hid them under her leg when she was done. Speed dating was one of her favorite activities to do when she was Taako’s guest on a cruise.

At first it started out as a way to hook up with someone that she would never see again. Pretty easy when it was the last day and everyone came from different places. Very quickly she realized that this was the perfect opportunity to spread chaos. She now had four rules:

No one gets to know her real name

No one gets to know any true facts about her, actually.

On the off chance she did like someone here, no spending the night with anyone.

Definitely no off the ship contact

The bell signaling the start of the night sounded and she pulled herself together, slapping on a name tag reading “Ryn” as her first victim, smirking and a little gross looking, sat down across from her.

“Lucky me, first round with the hottest girl in the room.”

Lup would be lying if she said she had never heard that one before.

“Oh god, I only hope that this will be over soon.”

His face dropped. “A little rude, aren’t we Ryn?” He leaned in close. “Playing hard to get?”

“How can I play hard to get when we’ve only just met?”

He paused, thinking. “Are you...rhyming with me?”

“Whatever do you mean? I’m afraid this I cannot see.”

“Okay, I see what’s going on here.”

“I do not understand, could you explain to a fellow peer?” Lup tried really hard to pull it off but she was grinning ear to ear.

The man rolled his eyes. “I think we’re done here.”

“Hey look who’s rhyming now!” His glare towards her was punctuated with the bell, signaling a partner change and hers couldn’t get away fast enough, done with her antics. She swapped out her name tag for one that read “Liza”.

Her next match was objectively the hottest man in the room and she’d be lying if she had said she hadn’t thought about breaking the rules. He sat down with some finger foods in his hand and took a bite. His face contorted and he spat the bite out in a napkin. “Oh, Gods. I think this is the worst food I’ve ever tasted on a cruise.”

Yeah, she wasn’t going home with this guy. How dare anyone spit out Taako’s food! She smiled sweetly, “Do you go on many of these?”

“Oh yeah, I cruise several times a year. I need something to do with all of the money I make.” He was really laying it on thick and it took everything she had not to roll her eyes.

“Sounds lonely.” She reached out and stroked his arm flirtatiously.

“It can be, sometimes.”

“Do you think I could help with that?”

He smirked. “Yeah, I think you could, babydoll.”

Gross. She almost gagged but smiled instead. She took out her pen and wrote a random room number on his arm. “This is my room. I’ll be back there in 15 minutes. Meet me there.”

His eyes lit up, “oh, yes. Sounds good. I’ll see you soon.” He stood up, winking at her and then he breezed out of the room as the bell rang.

“Ugh, so gross.” Lup made a gagging face trying to get the thought of him out.

“Hello - oh, are you okay?” She looked up to see a man in his thirties wearing glasses, a button up shirt, and blue jeans. He stood out in the room where every other man was wearing slacks and a tie. Lup paused for a second and then realized she had yet to speak and his face was getting more and more concerned for her.

“Uh, yes. Just swallowed down the wrong way, you know how it is.”

“Oh, yes I do,” He nodded solemnly. “Shit!” He yelled under his breath as he spilled half of his drink on himself while sitting down. Lup took this opportunity to switch out her name tag to “Eve”. After she was done he was still trying to clean himself up. His - Barry, she could tell from the tag - face was a deep red. Her heart pinged slightly at that, this poor man was so out of his element and it was kind of endearing.

“Here, let me help.” Lup handed over some napkins and leaned over the table, purposefully giving him a good view down her dress but he was so focused on cleaning up he didn’t even look. Lup didn’t know why she almost felt disappointed about that.

“Uh, thank you. I’m Barry.”

Double-checking her name tag she responded, “Eve.”

“Eve. That’s very pretty.”

“Thank you, Barold.”

He nearly coughed up his drink at that before collapsing into giggles. “Barold? I like it.”

“I think it’s fitting, Mr. Barold Bluejeans.”

“It’s actually Hallwinter -“

“Not in those jeans it’s not.”

He giggled again and damn if that didn’t do something to her. “Got me there. I’m not sure what people wear to cruises, I only packed swim trunks and blue jeans and I was not about to wear my trunks to a singles only event.”

“Oh, is this your first cruise?”

“Yeah, I won a contest at my university. I teach theoretical physics and I guess I had the most positive reviews or something from the students. I didn’t really know the contest was going on until I had won it.”

“Ooooh Professor Barold Bluejeans.” Something about that made her insides ache. “How are you enjoying your first cruise?”

“It’s nice. I haven’t taken a vacation since undergrad, so it’s been pretty great to just relax by the poolside and catch up on paperwork.”

“Did you seriously bring work to your vacation?”

Barry cocked his head, confused. “Yeah, is that a big deal?”

“Barold!! It’s a vacation! You don’t bring any work!” She was getting worked up and heads began to turn towards them. “You: drink a lot of alcohol, swim a lot, read a book by the beach, eat a lot of food, watch the weird as fuck shows they bring onboard, and hook up with a hottie you will never see again.” She listed these off on her fingers.

“Well I’ve done most of those things!”

“Yeah? Hook up with a hottie?” She winked at him and his face got a deep deep red.

“No, not that one. I read and swim and eat and drink. The food here is absolutely incredible, I’ve never had anything like it.”

“Yes! One point for Barold!” She high-fived him. “My brother is the head chef, everything he makes is exquisite.” Lup froze. She’s never revealed anything of herself at these before but with Barry it just felt natural. Maybe the rules didn’t need to be so strict after all. “What shows have you seen?”

“Well, uh, I haven’t seen any. I pretty much only swim, read, and eat.”

“So you haven’t explored the boat??”

“Not really.”

“Oh my gods, Barold. You are squandering this vacation. Cancel your plans tonight, we’re going exploring.”

He raised an eyebrow, amused. “Yeah?”

It was her turn to blush. Damn him. “If you want to, I mean. We haven’t exactly finish speed dating.”

“Hmm true, and I could find someone that loves doing paperwork poolside…”

She swatted at him playfully and he laughed. “I’m kidding! Yes, please, Eve. Let’s get the fuck out of here.”

Lup froze, at first upset that he misremembered her name before she realized that she had given him a fake one. It was too late to go back now, she figured. She could be Eve for the rest of the night. It’s not like she was ever going to see this man again.

“You okay?”

God, he was so observant. It was like he saw right through her. She smiled and grabbed his hand. “I’m perfect. Now come on, Bluejeans. We have a whole weekend of mischief to catch up on.”

#blupjeansweek2021 #blupjeans #barry bluejeans #lup #taz balance

[fernpost]

Cycle 3 - A Meal

[link to ao3]

[first] - [previous] - [next] 

“Do we not have it?” Lup’s voice, just on the edge of unadulterated panic, filters through the room. It is borderline sweltering, and they’ve been at it all day.

If they don’t have it, it’s all been for naught. Taako bites at his nail, racking his brain, “fuck, do we not?”

Lucretia is sitting across the room, writing down notes from the day before. Her hand stills as she looks up, “it’s missing?”

Lup wipes her brow, before snapping her fingers and dropping to her knees, opening a small cabinet. She digs frantically through what they have, “if it’s not here, there’s none. I’ve looked all over- we honestly should have had it sooner but there was so much to do and-”

Taako steps behind her, hands resting on his hips to feign casualness. Lup adjusts her position and curses as she hits her head. Taako is about to comment, when she gasps.

He is silent as she jolts backwards with a cry, hand held in the air in success, waving it in the air, “we have it!”

Taako pulls it from her grasp, making his way towards the stove. Lup follows close behind, “if we had used the rest of the garlic last week, I would have jumped ship in shame.”

“Can’t make Mama Davenport’s special meat stew without it. Who are we to surprise our great captain with subpar stew.” Taako peels it quickly, cutting it up and tossing it into the pot liberally, firm in his lifelong belief that no recipe can have too little of the perfect allium.

Lucretia smiles as she scribbles in both of her notebooks from the table, “and Taako couldn’t have transmuteted more because…?”

Handing the spoon to Lup, he turns with an affronted gasp, resting his hand dramatically against his chest, “Do you think me a subpar chef?” With a snort, he kneels to peek into the oven, checking the status of the bread they are baking, “but actually, transmuted food is never as good as the real stuff. You can always taste the difference. It’ll do in a pinch, but for the occasion the Taaco’s spare no expense.”

“Ah, of course.” She goes back to her writing, content in listening to the two of them cook more.

After a few more minutes of gentle stirring, Taako sends Lup to grab Barry from the lab, where he’s been pouring over the same notes for a few hours now. Magnus, Merle, and Cap’nport should be back within the next half hour, if the Sending note Taako received is to be believed.

Considering it’s from Merle, who's to say. But preserving the heat of a dish with magic is much easier than making a dish from scratch, so it won’t be the end of the world. Anyways, Taako will give Merle shit either way.

Taako hear’s Lup laugh as she approaches, so he knows she successfully managed to wrangle Barold away from his work. He is already tired of their strange almost-flirting rituals, but it’s nice to see Lup so excited about something, even if it is a nerd like Barry.

(Taako is steadfastly ignoring how much he enjoy’s Barry’s company himself. Or Magnus’s. Or Lucretia’s. Or how comforting it is to talk to Merle. Or how welcoming Davenport always is. It all means nothing. They’re all still his coworkers. He definitely never seeks out their company. He pretends not to think about how the last time he was around the same people this long was his aunt, and he pretends not to think about how that ended. And it never feels bad when they leave on dangerous missions to look for the Light. Never.)

“Lup, the bread!” Taako calls out, pulling the stew from the stove and bringing it over to the table. Lucretia picks her notebooks up, bringing them over to the small sitting room and leaving them on the rickety coffee table (it wasn’t always rickety. Magnus had been trying, apparently, to teach Barry a wrestling move Merle had described to him once. Mending only goes so far). Lup crosses the small kitchen quickly, grabbing the oven mitts from the counter and pulling the bread out. It smells absolutely divine, of course.

Barry hovers near the edge of the kitchen, hands hovering awkwardly in front of him, “can I help-”

“Not after last time, Bluejeans.” Taako places the lid on the stew, turning to the fridge to look for the cider bottles he knows are in there somewhere from a small market they found near the end of the last year.

“Can you grab the plates?” Lup asks as she removes the bread from the tin and begins cutting it. Barry is quick to help, pulling the plates down from the cabinet right next to her (he’s trying so hard to not brush against her, it’s almost sad). Once he has a stack of seven, he pulls out the utensils as well.

Lucretia stiffens from where she has made her way to the window in the sitting room, peering out. “They’re back!”

Barry glances over, almost overbalancing and dropping the silverware as he gets distracted. After he regains control of the plates, he asks, “how do they look?”

“No worse for wear. No one’s limping or missing anything important, at least.” She pauses, and squints, “I think Magnus is a little singed, though.”

“He’ll be fine.” Taako waves it off. The big guy not getting injured would be more surprising.

Lup is bringing the tray with the bread over when the front door opens. Taako places the last cider down before calling out, “oh Captain!”

“We have a surprise for you!” Lup yells.

“What do you-” Davenport pauses, and Taako has cooked enough for the gnome to know he is smelling the air. “Is that stew?” He rounds the corner with the others. He looks tired, thick bags hanging heavy under his eyes.

They were supposed to be gone a week for a recon mission, but Merle sent a message saying they’d be a few days later. About halfway through them being gone, Taako had started digging through the books Davenport brought. One was, for some reason, an old cookbook. It was covered in scribbled writing, and a note left at the beginning detailed how Davenport’s mother gifted it to him when he left for his first job on a ship. One recipe in particular had a sticky note marking it, and Taako had glanced through the recipe. It seemed easy enough, so he brought it to Lup to make.

If she had said anything about him being a sap, he’d deny it. He just enjoyed trying out a new recipe.

“Are we going to eat or just bask in the smell?” Taako sits at his normal seat, not waiting to begin to serve himself. He passes the ladle to Lup, watching as the others join them. Davenport remains standing, only moving when Magnus kicks his chair away from the table, gesturing for him to sit.

The ladle is passed to their captain, who scoops some of the stew and stares at it, “is this…” Davenport looks up at Lup and him, squinting, “did you two go through my cabin?”

An overlap of “no,'' and “Taako did,” answer his question, and Taako quickly slaps Lup on the arm. “Was just looking at your books. You expect me to not read a cookbook you’ve got hidden away?”

Davenport doesn’t answer. He scoops up some of the stew and sips at it, obviously hesitant. It’s quiet in the room, before he smiles, “almost as good as my mom made it.”

A cacophony of mockery aimed at Taako blusters out, his own voice just barely rising above as he defends his honor and abilities.

No one mentions how their captain looks a little misty-eyed. It’s been a long three years.

Later that night, Magnus approaches him and Lup as they play cards in the sitting room, vaguely describing a pie his dad used to make on Candlenights, asking if the two of them thought they could recreate it.

Taako is offended that he believes they can’t.

#lup #taako #lucretia #barry bluejeans #davenport #magnus burnsides #the stolen century #taz balance #my works

[fandomsnstuff]

Angus figures everything out and fucks up Lucretia’s whole Thing AU

Lucretia hires angus, innoculates him, and is like this is the deal with those missing people cases you were investigating

Angus says oh okay! This totally and completely satiases my curiosity :)

Internally angus says this is sus as hell

So he does what he does best, he snoops

So angus is snooping and somehow, cause he's a little crime boy who can sneak around real good, he finds the starblaster

He's like what the fuck is this

He gets in, and it's.....odd. he doesnt linger in any one room too long, he just kind of pokes his head into the bedrooms and moves on (he figures he shouldnt stay here too long, lest he get caught)

But the most peculiar thing is how lived in this place looks. There's mismatched furniture with throw pillows and blankets in the common area, a chore chart on the fridge, the bedrooms are all cluttered with knick knacks and clothes, beds unmade, theres a lab with papers scattered around tables and taped to the wall

But one room catches his attention

It's... fairly simple, and emptier than the others. Bookshelf with some books missing, a bare desk, but what catches his attention is the pile of red on the bed

He goes to investigate and finds robes and jackets, all with an odd patch and names embroidered on them

He finds, in this order:

A robe with "lucretia" embroidered on it

A jacket and robe, together as if someone had been wearing them at the same time, with "lup" and "taako"

A jacket with "davenport"

A robe with "merle"

A jacket with "magnus"

(there’s no barry robe cause he fell off the ship with it, these are the robes/jackets lucretia took off of the crew members as she sent them off to their new lives)

Now. This is after crystal kingdom and angus was at the candlenights party. He knows the director's name is lucretia

He knows who Davenport is

He knows who taako, magnus, and merle are

This is pre-LUP incident, so he doesnt know who lup is

Angus, appropriately freaked out, puts them all back and BOLTS

Angus vacates the premises

Runs back to his room

He tries to figure out what this all means, but his thoughts dodge around the obvious conclusion that's right in front of him

Hes too nervous to go back, it's not until the L U P incident that he decides okay. I have to go back

So he goes back. He goes into the room labeled Captain's Quarters (although "captain" has been scratched out and changed to "cap'nport". Angus doesnt think too hard about what that means)

In the desk he finds some folders with the same weird logo as the robes and jackets. He doesnt look in them. Not yet. He can do that back in his room. He cant spend too much time here.

Then he goes to the lab. He doesnt know what hes looking for, but he grabs ones that seem important. A notebook or two. Some papers clipped together. He just grabs and shoves them into his bag and he fuckin bolts again

he looks at what he grabbed and some of it he can read, some of it he can't

They lived in that ship. They were going on a mission for something. They made the grand relics to stop something. Theres a lot of notes on the planes.

Angus recognizes the way some stuff is redacted, and he kind of figures out that there must be another voidfish. And if the directors name was on one of those robes, maybe she has it.

Refuge mission comes and goes

Angus, cause he's so fucking good, is able to sneak back into lucretias personal quarters and finds junior. He fills a water bottle with the ichor and gets the fuck outta there

He gets back to his room, innoculates himself and is like AAAAAAAAAA

Cause he can finally put it all together properly

And he basically pieces together the whole hunger situation himself with the notes he grabbed

The stuff he grabbed from davenports room was the crew's like profiles or whatever from when they got hired on to the mission so angus now knows who lup is

So angus is like oh i GOTTA fix this

So he heads down to the reclaimers dorm with his bottle of ichor

Angus: i need you to drink this Merle: what is it? Angus: voidfish ichor Taako: *laughs* hate to break it to you kid, we already drank the voidfish juice. Angus: just- please? Magnus: yeah alright

So magnus drinks it. His breath catches and he kinda goes weak and he's shaking and he drops to his knees. After a minute or two (or more) he looks up at angus. "Holy shit," he says. He grabs the bottle from where he dropped it and holds it out to taako and merle. "Drink it." He says.

"Yeah alright," merle says. Same deal as with magnus.

Once merle collects himself, they both turn to taako.

"Yeah, alright. Sure. Let's get taako in on this weird party," he says, taking the bottle and drinking

This time, magnus is ready and he catches taako when his knees give out

"Im gonna fucking kill her," taako mumbles into magnus' shoulder, his knuckles white as he grips his shirt.

"You're not gonna kill her."

"Im gonna fucking hit her so HARD, i swear to god."

Taako keeps his face in magnus' shoulder, but magnus and merle watch as angus crosses the room to where taako had left the umbrastaff, and he walks back over to magnus and taako on the floor

"Sir?" Taako looks up at angus. Angus holds the umbrella out, "i think i know where your sister is."

(Lup, meanwhile, in the staff: HEEEEELLLLL YYYYYEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH)

It takes taako a second, but he realizes what angus is saying and scrambles out of magnus' hold and to his feet. He takes the umbrella and lifts it, about to snap it when angus says, "wait!"

Taako glares at him. "Ive waited ten years, kid. Make it snappy." "Madame director had a holy symbol in her office. I think it would ward against your sister, if shes a lich." "Uuugggggghhhhhhhhh LUCRETIAAAAAA"

The four of them go down planetside under the guise of a magic lesson and not wanting to burn any more "cryptic messages" into the walls

Taako snaps that fuckin umbrella as soon as his feet hit solid ground

Lup's back!

Lup does some magic shit to summon barry, so barold shows up, happy reunion, and then a Discussion on what to do re: davenport not being innoculated and re: lucretia

Their plan boils down to this: thb and angus will go back to the moon and act as if this never happened. As far as lucretia knows, thb are still under junior's influence

As soon as they can get davenport alone without rousing any suspicion, they bring him to their room and innoculate him. Once he's got his memories back, he'll be powerful enough to a) get his bracer off/disable the tracking spell in it and b) get off the base undetected

Davenport will definitely not want to go back to playing butler, so he'll sneak off the base and hang out with lup and barry until lucretia sends the boys to wonderland

When the boys get sent to wonderland, theyll meet up, get the bell all together, and THEN confront lucretia, cause at that point theyll have the whole light, and they'll have Options

So they do just that. They go back and innoculate davenport a few days later, a week at most

A panic ensues once everyone realizes davenport is missing

AND the tracking in his bracer is turning up nothing

Lucretia's blood pressure has never been higher

But everything goes as business per usual

Lucretia, oddly enough, suspects nothing re: the boys ‘cause surely they wouldve confronted her if they remembered

The boys get sent down to wonderland. They meet up with blupjeans and dav at the entrance. With the six of them with all their memories and full access to their skills they take edward and lydia down in like 30 minutes. Tops.

So edward and lydia get their asses thoroughly handed to them by the six of them

(Davenport has the time of his LIFE)

They head back to the lich cave, barry gets in his new body and gets innoculated (the boys brought some ichor with them for him)

Lup possesses barry, then barry-with-lup and dav get in the pocket spa and back up to the moon they go

Lucretia is in her office when avi comes knocking "Uh... director? The boys are coming back." "Already?" "Yeah." "Are you sure it's them?" "Yep."

Lucretia is.... stunned. It's been... an hour and a half. Two, maybe. She has full faith in the boys but they took down wonderland in two hours?????

Not even two hours

She goes to meet them, highly suspicious

But they arrive and, sure enough, it's them. No magic. No tricks. It's them, for sure.

taako has the bell and hes just holding it casually from the top as if it isnt one of the most powerful magic items in existence. And she can tell he isnt thralled, that's just how hes decided to transport it.

Lucretia: ive got to admit, you boys took care of that...much faster than i expected Magnus: ah, it was no big Merle: piece of cake! Taako: yeah, luce, shit was easy. Dunno what you were talkin' about earlier.

And lucretia just freezes. Luce. Thats what taako called her. It’s what they all called her, really, but it’s the nickname Taako took 4 whole cycles to give to her, officially cracking the door of friendship open to her. And she looks him in the eyes and she knows that he knows. And she looks at merle and magnus and she can tell they know, too.

And taako gives her a venomous smile, all teeth, and says, "why dont we go have a little chat, madame director" and she flinches at the way he spits out her title

She doesnt know what to do but nod and turn to leave. As she turns, there's angus, looking up at her with a determined set to his brow, and she knows he knows too

They head back to her office, and taako pulls the pocket spa out, and before lucretia can ask him what hes doing, out walks barry and davenport. And barrys eyes have got that red glow about them, so she knows lup's here too.

"Take down the lich ward, lucretia," barry says.

She does, and now there's a firey, red robed lich among them.

Now this is where things get a little iffy for how they work out but here's what i got

They have a similar confrontation as canon where theyre bickering about staying or going, shield or no shield, and im thinking this is where taako has his "there's a third option" realization

And, because they did extreme wonderland speedrun, and they didnt take a whole extra day to travel to the lich cave and just used fuckin magic to get there, theyre a whole day ahead of where they were in canon

The hunger is close enough at this point tho that they can enact the plan like. Now.

But magnus insists on returning Fisher's baby to them first

As magnus takes junior, lucretia works on getting the base secured and getting the bureau members ready for if the hunger touches down before they can cut it off

Magnus goes down to fisher with the baby, he takes his axe and swings, breaking the tank open

Johann, still alive and now soaking wet, is like dude wtf

Magnus returns the baby and out goes the story and song

Now johann is REALLY like DUDE WTF

Magnus is like im off to save the universe. Peace.

So since theyre a whole day ahead of the hunger, all seven of them go up in the ship

And then they fight and they win and they cut the hunger off and it's rad

The end

#taz au #angus mcdonald #taz balance #magnus burnsides #merle highchurch #taako taaco #taako #taz taako #taz lucretia #lucretia adventurezone

[sgrumby]

(Prompt for @ask-maxie-boy!)

“Hey, guys, me and Krav were hoping you could settle something for us.” Kravitz shoots Barry a glare and a scowl from behind Taako’s back, but Barry just grins and sips his coffee before he continues. “Where should we go on holiday? Krav was thinking the beach, but I thought it’d be nice to go skiing in the mountains.”

“The beach, obviously,” Taako replies.

“Skiing sounds nice,” Lup says, simultaneously.

The twins turn to each other, glaring.

It all started with a bet. Barry had told Kravitz that a hundred years of cohabitation teaches you exactly what buttons to push. Kravitz had said you don’t need one hundred years – the twins are so easy to rile up, he could do it with just two years of experience. And, like the gambler he is, Kravitz had bet a thousand gold that he could wind up the twins about a more asinine topic than Barry could.

So, naturally, Barry took the bet.

“We go to the beach, like, all the time,” Lup says. “It’d be nice to get a change of scenery.”

“Why would we go skiing when we can surf? And you can’t sunbathe on top of a fucking mountain.”

“You’re the only person who surfs, Taako, and you know that because you invented it.”

“Yeah, I did, Lulu, and it’s dope as fuck. I see what this is really about – you and Barold are jealous that you can’t shred those waves like I do.”

“Oh, really? It’s not about the time you ate shit on the bunny slope?”

“I - we were, like, twelve!”

Kravitz scowls at Barry, but whispers, “fine. Point in your favour. But just you wait, Bluejeans.”

-

“Hey, love,” Kravitz says, kissing Taako. “Barry and I had something of a disagreement, and I was hoping you could clear it up for us.” He gives Barry a shit-eating grin. “Which cooking oil is better? Sunflower or olive?”

“Oh, uh, olive oil,” Taako says, distractedly, as he stirs the sauce he’s making. “It’s actually anti-carcinogenic. Real good for you.”

Lup’s sat at the table, and she looks up from her book. “Taako, I know I did not just hear you say olive oil. Are you serious? Sunflower oil has omega 3 and shit. Good for the brain.”

“Lulu, don’t start shit. We both know olive oil is better -”

“Oh, you would think that,” she says. “Because I’ve been eating sunflower oil this whole time, and so my brain is, like, twice as big as yours.”

"Right,” he says. “You won’t be saying that when I live forever because I’ve been drinking olive oil straight from the bottle.”

“Yeah? This is the reason I did better than you on our Institute entrance exam, because I made bacon with sunflower oil that morning -”

“You did better than me by one mark!” Taako shouts over her. “And I had a cold that morning -”

“Probably because of your weak-ass olive oil immune system!” Lup retorts.

Barry’s doing his best to pretend the argument isn’t happening, but Kravitz sits in the seat next to him and leans in close. “Point to Kravitz, I believe.”

-

“Hey, Krav and I were wondering, which of you guys was actually born first?” Barry asks, mildly. “Cos, you both say you’re the baby twin when you want sympathy, or the oldest twin when you’re trying to boss the other around.”

“Yeah, I’m the oldest,” Lup says. “Our birth certificate says so.”

“Because the clocks went back!” Taako protests. “I was born first.”

Lup rolls her eyes at Barry. “He says this all the time.”

“And it’s true! You just don’t like admitting it,” he says. “Time is fake. I’m older.”

“Okay, but, legally, I’m older.”

“No one here cares about laws, Lulu.”

“We’re all death cops!” Lup says. “Our whole-ass job is about laws.”

“Yeah, but does the Raven Queen give a shit who’s older?”

Lup stands up and summons her scythe. “I’m gonna ask her, right now.”

She cuts a portal and steps through, leaving Taako gaping. “What? That’s not fair!” He shouts after her. “You’re her favourite, we all know that! Krav, take me to the celestial plane, I need to speak to Istus, I need to get her on my side.”

“Lup isn’t the Queen’s favourite,” Kravitz says, pouting. “She’s only worked there a year. I’ve been in her service for centuries -”

He looks at both Barry and Taako’s disbelieving faces. “Krav, I love you, but don’t lie to yourself. Let’s go, c’mon,” Taako says.

Kravitz looks miserable as he cuts a portal. Barry can only mouth “sorry”.

-

“Taako, what’s the difference between a hash brown and a latke?” Kravitz asks, sweetly. “Barry says they’re the same, but I don’t buy it.”

“As usual, you’re right, babe,” Taako says, kneading bread dough. “Latkes are, like, deep-fried. A hash brown is done in a pan.”

“Cover your ears, Barry dearest, I don’t want you hearing this shit. They’re the same,” Lup says. “My idiot brother doesn’t know what he’s talking about. You can cook a hash brown in a pan or deep fry it, and it’s the same thing either way.”

“Krav, throw something at Lup, my hands are full of dough,” Taako says. “They aren’t the same at all.”

“Taako, the way you cook something doesn’t change what it is. Whether I put a sausage on a barbecue or in the oven, it’s still a sausage.”

“Except that latkes and hash browns aren’t the same. They’re made with different ratios of onion to potato -”

“That’s personal preference,” Lup says. “You can make a hash brown with more onion if you want.”

“A hash brown with more onion is a latke!”

“A hash brown with more onion is a latke because all hash browns are latkes,” Lup says.

Taako throws a handful of dough at her, and she shrieks, reaching for the tomato she’d been preparing to chop to hurl back. Barry barely blinks, just ducking under the table to avoid the incoming food fight. Kravitz slides under the table next to him. “Another point for Kravitz,” he says, with a shit-eating grin.

-

Barry’s woken up by someone tying a blindfold around his eyes. Instinctively, he lashes out, and his hand slaps into something.

“Ow, fuck, Barold, cool it,” Taako’s voice comes from the darkness.

“Taako? Taako, what the fuck are you doing?”

“We’re holding an intervention, come on.”

Taako pulls him out of bed, dragging him by the hand along corridors. “Stairs, Barold, watch out.” He says, and Barry still almost falls even with the warning.

They take the stairs slowly and enter their house’s living room. “Barry?” Kravitz’s voice says from somewhere.

“Kravitz? What’s happening?”

“I don’t know,” he says. “Your wife blindfolded me.”

“Yeah, Taako got me, too,” Barry says. He's eased into a chair, and then the blindfold is whipped off. He gets a split second to look around the room – Lup and Taako have set up a table in the centre, with him and Kravitz on one side of it and the twins on the other – before they switch a lamp on and shine it right in his face. “Ah, Lup, what the fuck?”

“What’s happening with you two?” Taako demands.

“Happening?” Kravitz asks, but he winces and covers his eyes as the lamp is shone on him instead.

“You heard us,” Lup says, as Barry blinks spots from his eyes.

“I - Lup, I’ve got no fucking idea what you’re talking about,” Barry says. Taako rounds on him with the light, but Barry looks away before he can get the chance to shine it in his eyes.

“You’re always arguing,” Taako says. “Love, me ‘n’ Barry ‘ave ‘ad a little disagreement,” he says, in a pretty decent impression of Kravitz’s work accent.

“You’re tearing this family apart!” Lup says, dramatically.

“What - we’re not arguing!” Kravitz says.

“Oh, yeah? What was that the other day, about whether fantasy Netflix or Hulu was better?” Lup glares.

“Or last week, when you were fighting over cheddar versus gruyere?”

Barry can’t help it. He laughs out loud, and Kravitz does too. The idea that Lup and Taako thought they hated each other because of their bet is just hysterical.

The twins glare, identical bemused looks on their faces, as Kravitz and Barry melt down laughing. “One of you had better tell me what’s happening here,” Lup threatens.

Kravitz recovers first. “We - we had a bet,” he wheezes. “It’s so easy to set you off, we wanted to see who could do it over the most asinine shit.”

Both twins gasp simultaneously. They both have offended looks on their faces that only set Barry and Kravitz off laughing again.

Eventually, the twins look at each other, and Taako breaks first. “This whole fucking time you were – you were trying to set us off?” He says with an amused smile.

“We thought you fucking hated each other,” Lup laughs. “You were fighting about such inconsequential shit.”

They laugh together for a second longer, before Kravitz says, “but, uh, there’s a thousand gp on the line here, so who won?”

“Barry,” Lup says, at the exact same time as Taako says, “Kravitz.”

They glare at each other. Barry and Kravitz share a look as the twins start to bicker once again.

#the adventure zone #taakitz #blupjeans #taz #taz balance #barry bluejeans #lup #taako #kravitz #writing

[terezis]

mrmram (but not really) concept: that one video of justin unboxing his olive garden unlimited pasta pass except it's taako

taako: uh, hello reapers.

taako: …

taako: remember when… fantasy olive garden had, their never-ending pasta pass promotion -

lup: okay.

taako: and you could pay a hundred gold for… seven weeks of free pasta, uh - and you did it as a goof, because they were only selling a thousand and you thought it would be kind of prestigious but also kind of funny -

taako: well… uh, life called your bluff, and… you actually received the pasta pass, this - this - this week, i did, and… um - i don’t… know… what to do with it now, it’s literally just sitting here in my hand and i’m turning it over like a loaded crossbow, and i don’t know -

lup: is it heavy?

barry: heavy with the weight of decisions.

-

taako: okay, here’s the thing. i have a child, that’s another thing, to know, so like, going to dinner is really not a thing that is easy for me right now. if i don’t use it seven times i wasted money. what do i do?

lup: you gotta - okay. you gotta go at like three o'clock in the afternoon without husband or kid, just like, pop in real quick for a quick pasta fix -

taako: “heeey, it’s taako!”

barry: “hey, can i just get some pasta real quick?”

taako: “table for uno!”

barry: you are - you are - you gotta conflate these issues. because - you are saying you having a child is going to keep you from going to fantasy olive garden, i say, you call that daddy’s pasta hour, you dip out at three, you get back at four, and you have just a little fasul every day, if you have just a little fasul every day, it can’t hurt you.

taako: so - how do you think, when you say, barold - when you say pop out for daddy’s pasta hour from three to four - how do you think kids work exactly? do you think you say to it, “ango, cool your heels. cool your jets, angus, i’ll be right back!”

lup: do you really think angus won’t fucking kick it for like, an hour -

kravitz: welcome to therapy, um… so what would you like to talk about today, angus? well, one day my dad left for pasta and he never came back.

kravitz: and by one day, i mean, every day, for seven months.

barry: the eleventh year of my life i had to live the fact that my dad loved pasta more that me.

#my reaper my reaper and me #Anonymous #ooc though b/c we all know taako would not HESITATE to abandon his boy for a plate of halfway decent fettuccine and some endless breadsticks #LOL

[lichlover]

Okay so this a balance headcanon, and it is technically one I saw in a text post somewhere on tumblr that has been lost to the scroll of my dashboard months and months ago, but. The concept that the reason Barry was on the starblaster in the first place... was because he was some kinda undercover death cultist trying to kickstart the apocalypse... but then it happened and he was like "wait shit this actually sucks" and then has to figure out what to do

please consider donating to my ko-fi!

This was how it was written: Sildar Hallwinter would end the world.

Before his departure, they’d etched his name into the first of the sacred texts; his true name, five syllables destined to strike terror into the hearts of all living beings and their menial existences. It would all perish in the Apocalypse, of course. Everything would. But he and his fellows would ascend in death, as would every record that burned in the Great Blaze of the end times, and the universe would know their history. The true history. The history he would go down in as the Catalyst for the End of All Things, the Second Revelation, the Midnight Prophet for the Last Downfall of Mankind.

The gnome in front of him peered over the angular frames of his spectacles and said, “Barry Bluejeans?”

Sildar Hallwinter had also lost a bet.

But it was no matter, for there was no meager chronicle that would remember him as Barold J. Bluejeans, chief science officer of the IPRE Starblaster. He would be survived only by the destruction set to ravage their world in a matter of months, a Dawning so terrible that it would leave nothing of civilization in its wake. No one would know the name Barry Bluejeans. Everyone would know the name Sildar Hallwinter, and the thought made his stomach knot with such anticipation that he had to collect himself before he could respond.

“That’s me,” he said, and grinned a different man’s grin at the gnome—Captain Davenport of the IPRE, unknowing Chariot to the Catalyst for the End of All Things, the Second Revelation, the Midnight Prophet for the Last Downfall of Mankind. “Reporting for duty.”

Sildar was well accustomed to the dank, ash-streaked tunnels of the Fellowship’s headquarters beneath Ascendant’s Peak, but the IPRE headquarters were sleek and warm, drawing him in with rounded walls and high, arching ceilings. Everywhere he looked, another enormous set of windows opened to the landscape below, as of yet untouched by the Cataclysm Foretold. He wasn’t used to this much natural light, and he certainly wasn’t used to people smiling and waving as they passed. “Another poor soul for the Big One, Dav?” someone called, and the captain waved them off affably.

For an organization completely aware of the end times, and completely unaware of the fact that he, Sildar, would be responsible for their failure, they were all terribly… cheery.

“We’ve already gathered the other crew members,” said the captain, when they came to a halt in front of a nondescript door. “They’re just, uh, through here. We’ll start our first briefing in the next—next half hour, but for now, feel free to socialize. G-Get to know them. We’ll call you when we’re ready.”

“Thanks,” said Sildar, and the captain mumbled something under his breath. “Uh, what was that?”

“Oh,” said the captain. “Nothing.” He turned, and it was only then that Sildar’s brain registered the words; it had sounded almost like good luck.

No matter. Sildar opened the door.

“Incoming!”

Sildar yelped—actually yelped—and ducked aside just as a chair flew over his head and exploded against the wall. A shower of wooden fragments and very magical sparks hit the ground in front of him, and he sputtered, wordless, on the precipice of reaching for his own wand—was this an ambush? Had they discovered the truth of his presence already?

“Oh, shit,” somebody said, and a silhouette appeared through the smoke and magical residue. Sildar caught his breath. Perhaps he was dead, then; perhaps one of the wooden shards had caught him through the heart, and the Avatar of Renewal through Annihilation had come to meet him on the threshold of the afterlife. She looked like divinity, at any rate: tall and elegant, with waves of hair that glittered like finely spun gold and eyes that blazed with the last vestiges of power. Eyes that settled on him, and softened instantly. No, Sildar thought. She couldn’t possibly be the Avatar of Renewal, because she looked kind.

“Shit,” said the divine being again. Her ears twitched downward with concern—an elf, then. “Lucky break, babe. You okay?”

Sildar blinked, and found himself at a loss for words.

“Leave it to you to fuckin’ scare the shit outta the newcomer!” A voice like hers rose through the smoke, and as it cleared, Sildar made out four other bodies, all draped in the ostentatious red of the IPRE and squinting into the gloom. The one who had spoken, another willowy elf with even longer golden locks, lifted a hand in the air and snapped his fingers, and all the smoke dissipated at once. “You had to launch it at the fuckin’ wall, Mags!”

His companion, a human who stood taller than everyone else in the room and looked battle-scarred to the bone despite his youth, gestured indignantly at the aftermath. “But did you see how fucking awesome that was? And that was a whole science experiment! Setup—uh, hypothesis, trials, conclusion?”

“Which is?” The elf unspooled two letters into a long, drawn-out drawl.

“That this room was totally used for magic shit! And now we can do whatever we want in here!”

“Um,” came another voice from the window, and Sildar looked over to see a dark young woman with a head of platinum-bright hair, gazing nervously at the set of admittedly impressive scorch marks over his head. “I think if anything, that proves we shouldn’t do what we want in here.”

“Agree to disagree,” said “Mags,” with undue confidence.

“That’s—but that’s not what science is—”

The final figure in the room, a portly dwarf with flowers woven into his beard, shook his head and clicked his tongue. “Look at the impression you just made,” he said. “Going around, trying to kill people you just met—what kind of monsters do something like that?”

The divine being made a sound somewhere between a chuckle and a sigh and pushed a few loose strands of hair off her face. “You must be the chief science officer,” she said, and stuck out a hand. “Sorry for the accidental attempted murder. I’m Lup.”

Lup.

“I’m,” said Sildar. “Uh.”

This time she really did laugh—a lyrical, full-bodied sound that he felt deep in his chest. “Tell me we didn’t just knock your name outta your head.”

“Oh, no, it’s, uh—” Lup. She looked at him with a smile so resplendent he had to catch his breath all over again. What did she know of Sildar Hallwinter, the Catalyst for the End of All Things, the Second Revelation, the Midnight Prophet for the Last Downfall of Mankind? What did she know of anything beyond all the light she cast in every direction?

“I’m, uh, Barry,” he said. “Barry J. Bluejeans.”

.

Here are some things Sildar Hallwinter learns about Barry J. Bluejeans:

He has a penchant for getting into character. Maybe that’s more Sildar than Barry, but there’s something so intoxicating about the drama of it all, especially when no one else knows he’s playing a role. Barry is a bit of a thespian, if he does say so himself.

That said, he’s sort of awkward. More of Sildar’s influence. When you’ve spent your whole life preparing to fulfill your divine purpose in the End of All Things, it’s a little hard to adjust to things like game night and brunch.

He’s smart. Really smart. The Fellowship hadn’t really encouraged science—everything else came second to the teachings of the Apocalypse—but not only is Barry-slash-Sildar naturally inclined for it, he actually enjoys it.

He can’t swim. Sildar can, and rather enjoys it, but it’s a little bit of flavor text he can’t resist.

He’s not half bad at making friends.

The crew of the Starblaster were, of course, a means to an end, and he would develop no meaningful relationship with any of them beyond what was necessary to keep up appearances. That was his mandate, at least. But it was hard. Much harder than he’d expected, really. And despite himself, he—Barry—found it all to easy to laugh at the dwarf Merle’s gods-awful jokes and stay up late to hear Captain Davenport recount tales of grandeur. He let himself be roped into more magic-powered “experiments” (in the loosest sense of the word) with the human fighter, Magnus, who actually seemed to enjoy death-defying stunts with the zeal of someone from the Fellowship. He got to know the soft-spoken but brilliant archivist, Lucretia, and her remarkably meticulous transcriptions. On one particularly reckless night, he joined the long-haired elf Taako on a quest to fill a particularly uppity supervisor’s pockets full of pudding.

And as the Appointed Hour approached, Barry found himself spending late nights in the IPRE labs with Lup, testing and recording speculations on arcane theory and downing enough coffee to drive them to hysterics by dawn. They were all a little nervous, a little sad, a little desperate to sort their affairs before takeoff, but Lup tackled new problems with the kind of determination that demanded solutions. She was the most ingenious person Barry had ever met. And when she sat back from an arcane reaction gone wrong, her hairline blackened with soot and grinning like a caffeine-tripped maniac, he thought she was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

This was how it was until the Apocalypse arrived.

Barry woke the morning of with a planet-shattering hangover.

He crawled to the mirror and squinted blearily into the glass; thanks to the IPRE’s constant offerings of complimentary coffee and cake and Taako’s singlehanded banquets, he’d put on weight over the last several months, and he’d started to love the gentle resilience his body had gained. Sildar was clean-shaven and angular, but Barry was soft and stubbly. A few nights before, Lup’s gaze had caught on his chin, and she’d told him how nice he looked with a five o’clock shadow.

He’d thought she was joking, but that was just how she was—kind.

He went to his closet and started to mull over which shirt to wear.

The day was dark and still, the sky an unbroken slate grey, and it was just what the sacred texts had imagined: not a living thing stirred for miles beyond the horizon. Even the grass beneath Barry’s feet, as he followed Davenport to the Starblaster’s gangway, had turned an off-color, metallic shade. They said their goodbyes to the Institute, and to the enormous crowd at starboard, and in the eerie light they all looked like corpses risen from the grave. There was something hanging over their heads that felt nothing like the terrible glory the Fellowship had promised; instead it was unsettled, and sickly, and wrong.

Barry swallowed the knot gathering rapidly in his throat and followed his crew up the gangway. There was but one thing left for him to do now—him, Sildar Hallwinter, the Catalyst for the End of All Things, the Second Revelation, the Midnight Prophet for the Last Downfall of Mankind. And then the Hour would be upon them at last.

He left the others on the bridge and walked to the Bond Engine.

The explosives tucked inside his robe were light, and branded with the sigil of the Fellowship, although no one would be able to tell in the ensuing destruction. It was certain to be localized, of course; they were meant to damage the engine and nothing more. He could never deprive himself—or anyone else, for that matter—the opportunity to witness the Terror as it began its First Assault on the world of the living. No one knew quite what it would look like, or how it would feel, but the Fellowship had promised a beautiful ascendancy for all its members. And now Sildar would seal his fate. He would seal everyone’s fate.

“Barold!”

Sildar fumbled an explosive, and it was almost the last thing he ever did. He whirled around, and there was Taako, waving him over from the bottom of the staircase. “What’re you doing?”

“Nothing,” said Barry, faintly. “Why?”

“Cap’n’port wants everybody on the bridge for the launch.” He flapped his arm at the bridge, looming above them against a wall of indiscernible storm clouds. “C’mon!”

“Uh,” Barry said. Suddenly the explosives weighed too heavily in his robe. “In a sec!”

“He means now, Barry! This storm ain’t lookin’ too good!”

No, no, no. Not yet.

But I don’t want—

What does it matter what you want?

Sildar Hallwinter gripped the hem of his pocket.

And Barry Bluejeans whispered a disarming spell, followed by a shrinking charm. Three marbles branded with the sigil of the High Fellowship of the Great Prophecy for the First Revelation rattled in his pocket as he jogged toward Taako and the bridge.

They escaped by the skin of their teeth. Sildar Hallwinter watched his world consumed by a force so uncaring, so unfeeling, that it couldn’t possibly be the Herald of Rebirth for All Things. He watched it rip everything apart—the IPRE headquarters where he’d met his crew, the ice cream parlor he’d braved with Magnus and Lucretia, the farmer’s market where Taako had taught him the difference between parsley and basil, the enormous lake Davenport had taken them sailing on for a weekend, the small garden Merle had kept just outside their dorms. 

The horizon, where he’d watched the sun set with Lup.

In the space between planes, Sildar Hallwinter was unmade. And when the threads of his body settled back into place, he caught his breath and thought, Never again.

This was how it was written: Barry J. Bluejeans would save the world.

#mirandatam #ask #the adventure zone #taz balance #ipre #barry bluejeans #fic #mine #GUESS WHO TRIPPED AND WROTE 2.2K #THANKS FOR THIS TRULY INCREDIBLE PROMPT

[the-badass-journal-keeper]

Softly and Sincerely

Barry felt it first. During a particularly challenging year, Lup caught him crying, and she softly and sincerely consoled him. And just for a moment, the professional wall between them came down, and something shone through.

Barry has always dealt with feeling "off" or "bad" for "no good reason" on his own. Lup reminds him that he's not as alone as he thinks he needs to be.

The link to read on Ao3 will be in the reblog!

-

"Oh, h-hey!"

It had been cold and hard most of their time on this plane. There weren't many civilizations on the planet, and the few they encountered were distrustful of outsiders. It had taken most of the year, but they found the Light and didn't have to fight anyone for possession of it. The whole planet had been stuck in winter since they got there and finding food had been difficult. But at last, spring had arrived.

Nothing was particularly wrong that day. Nothing was particularly wrong at all. They were still running from the Hunger. They still didn't know how to stop it. They had the Light this cycle. There was more food, more sun. Magnus and Merle had died a few months back, but the rest of the crew was relatively healthy.

So why did it feel like there was a jagged hole carved in Barry's chest? His breathing was difficult. His heart ached with each beat. The pain crept up his neck and clouded his mind, making the world outside himself a bit harder to perceive, a bit harder to deal with. But it was nothing he couldn't handle. There wasn't anything wrong with him, physically. So he needed to just... stop feeling like this.

"There's nothing wrong. Did you need something?"

Why couldn't he stop feeling like this?

The ache had crept up on him as the day wore on. He felt weighed down. He couldn't act like it, though. He didn't want anyone asking what was wrong. Because nothing was wrong. He sat through dinner, only half tasting the warm, easy soup and only listening to the conversation enough that his face showed the right reactions at the right times. 'Appear engaged without needing to devote too much of your brain to the conversation.' It was something he had perfected long ago. If he did it right, no one noticed he hadn't said a word the whole time. And he usually did it right.

"Well," Lup said, and Barry could feel the air shift. He was about to be pulled into whatever it was she was talking about, somehow. "Bluejeans here would know about that. He's a nerd. Possibly King Nerd."

"You don't need to worry about me. Heh. I'm- I'm good."

He smiled and laughed with them.

When dinner ended, Barry helped clear the table and wash the dishes. He was present. Seen. But he didn’t have to engage with anyone. If he did it right, no one would notice when he slipped off later. Be seen for a while, then retreat- that was the best way he had found to avoid being accused of "not being part of the team" or "disappearing as soon as possible" or any other such phrase. Phrases that meant he was doing something wrong when he would shut himself in his lab or bedroom with whatever distraction he found for himself. Hiding until the feeling that his skin was vibrating and his bones were turning to stone and his eyes were too weak to focus and his ears were too sharp to filter out irrelevant noise- Until all that faded. 

It was a lot of work, avoiding appearing cold or standoffish. But not as much work as dealing with people who had decided that he was those things. Not as much work as having to explain himself every time he wanted to be alone, or didn't talk enough, or was "just acting weird". Not as much work as trying to explain how he felt when he felt like this. Or why he felt like this.

"Bluejeans." The Captain waited at the entrance to the kitchen for Barry's attention.

"Yeah?" He was elbow deep in washing dishes for Lucretia to dry, but they were almost done. He hoped whatever Davenport wanted wouldn't keep him long.

"How far along is your analysis of the elemental planar distances and their possible effect on the seasons here? I know I asked you to get it to me by next weekend, but-"

But you need the report early, Barry completed in his head. "Oh. I need to copy over everything I have with some unit changes. Is- can it wait until tomorrow morning? Or do you need it tonight?"

Davenport's eyebrows rose for just a moment before a smile crossed his face. "I was about to offer you another week to complete it. I know those measurements aren't easy to get accurately, and that you're basically inventing the math behind everything." He nodded. "Good work, Bluejeans. Don't rush to get the final copy to me, but I'm excited to see what you found."

"Ah, no- not a big deal, Captain. Uh. But, thanks?"

Davenport left and Barry finished the dishes, thinking about how he should have used the right units in his calculations in the first place. It only made sense to use units that required fewer conversions along the way, no matter how much less common those units were than the ones he used in the first place.

He was so tired.

"Please just- I'm fine. I'm fine."

Why did he have to feel like this?

Somehow, somehow, he had finally escaped to his lab. He had to use one of his higher level tactics and claim to have a vague malady, like a headache, that no one could challenge to get out of hanging out with the others in the lounge. Actually, in this case, he did have a headache along with everything else. Regardless, he was in his lab, and he was alone. He reminded himself that he couldn't use those types of excuses too often, or he would face suspicion. Or concern (arguably worse than suspicion).

Some amount of time later, Barry realized he had zoned out. He should have started working on something. He should have used that time for research, or brainstorming, or going over his old notes. His notebook was right in front of him on the lab bench. Why didn't he open it when he sat down? He hadn’t even bothered to turn on the lab’s lights.

"Please..."

His mind had answers for that question. It had answers for why he felt the way he did right then, why he hadn't managed to just get over it already. Then, it had answers for him about so many other things.

He would never research fast enough or well enough to find the knowledge needed to defeat the Hunger. There was no spell he could craft or create or wield that would make a difference. The multiverse was depending on him, and he wasn't going to be enough.

He would never design an experiment that would give them an advantage. No science he could pull out of his brain would make their ship faster or the Light easier to find or the Hunger slower. He would never grasp the inner workings of the laws and mechanisms of the universe well enough to explain or deconstruct the Hunger.

And, his mind supplied, that meant that no one on the ship was safe. No one on any plane they visited was safe. Getting out of this situation was on the head science and engineering guy. He was here to protect the team from all problems short of those physical dangers their security officer handled. Barry himself was the reason no one was okay. So how could he expect to feel okay, knowing that everyone-

The click of the door snapped Barry out of his mind and back to reality. Someone was in the lab and- shit he could feel his eyes had already been welling with tears. He could not cry in front of a crewmember. He couldn't let himself cry in front of anyone.

"’Sup, Barold?" Lup stepped in and closed the door. She didn’t bother with the lights, either, using dark vision to locate the book of ancient curses she had been studying lately.

He stared hard at the ceiling and took a breath to try and steady himself enough to look calm, normal, not like he has been seconds away from crying. He turned to face the door. "Oh, h-hey!" He gripped the edge of the lab table to hide the trembling in his hands.

She squinted at him and came around the table to stand in front of him. "You okay? You seem kind of off. Something go wrong with your nerd math?"

He shrugged. He really didn’t want to deal with ‘Why are you acting so weird?’ type questions right now. The weight of the emptiness in his chest was growing. "There's nothing wrong. Did you need something?"

"You really don't look..." She placed the back of her hand on his forehead, then moved it to the side of his face. He pulled a few inches away, just enough to signal a clear 'please stop.'

"You don't need to worry about me. Heh. I'm- I'm good." Liar, his mind said. You're drowning here. You're letting everyone down. If you're good with that, then there's something even worse wrong with you.

"I'mmmmm not really much of a worrier." She crossed her arms and looked him in the eye for a moment, almost daring him to look away.

He did look away. He had to. He wasn't sure how much longer he could keep the panic out of his eyes. He didn’t want pity, he didn’t want judgement, he didn’t want to have to find a way to talk her out of feeling responsible to do anything about his own messed up thoughts and feelings and… and just all of him.

"Please just- I'm fine. I'm fine."

"Barry..."

The concern on her face. The half step she took closer to him. The hand she put on his upper arm. They hurt.

Before he could even take a breath, he was caving into that chasm in his chest, tears filling his eyes too quickly. He needed- He needed to get away. He needed her to leave. He needed not to cry in front of his coworker.

"Please..." He managed that one rough word, his head down, a hand sliding under his glasses and covering his eyes. He tensed to hold his feelings at bay just a few seconds longer. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't escape. He couldn’t breathe.

In a tone of voice he had only ever heard her use with Taako, she said, “C’mere.”

Her arms wrapped around him. He returned the hug on autopilot.

"It's okay to have bad days, Barry."

Those whispered words were enough for him to start breathing again.

"You don't have to pretend you’re okay when you’re not. Not with me. And I'll bet you none of the others would want that, either."

He squeezed his eyes shut and dropped his forehead to her shoulder.

"You don't have to hide like this."

He was fighting, still fighting to steady his breathing, to control the shaking in his arms, to hold onto the ache in his throat and head and eyes because the second he stopped fighting-

"We all love you."

He didn't know why those words cleared away all the tension and need for control and fear of judgement within him.

He didn't know why he was feeling those things in the first place.

But for the first time in years- longer than he'd been on The Starblaster, that was for sure-

Barry opened up, just the smallest bit, the part of himself that ached and screamed and couldn't let him rest.

And he let someone else see. He let someone else in. He gave in and cried.

Lup’s kind words continued as if his tears and trembling and quiet wimpers were no big deal. One of her hands rubbed his shoulder the whole time. What felt like hours, but was probably minutes later, when Barry was capable of feeling anything other than the anxious, grieving, homesick, terrified, exhausted feelings flowing out with his tears, he found his breathing syncing with the slow brush of her hand.

A moment fell over the lab where the only sounds were their breathing and the hum of the Bond Engine, the two of them still holding on to each other.

"How are you doing?" she whispered.

Barry released her and straightened himself on the lab stool. He took a moment to run his robe sleeve over his face and look for his glasses. (He didn’t remember when his glasses had come off, but he knew Lup must have done it, because they sat neatly facing him with the arms folded up, instead of unfolded and probably upside down a bit too close to the edge of the table, the way he usually put them down.)

“I’m uh…” He felt… numb. Light. Not “better” necessarily, the chasm in his chest was still there. But the rough edges had been smoothed, and maybe it was a few inches shallower. “I’m okay, now.” He took the box of tissues Lup held out to him, pulling a few to clean his face properly. “For real now, though. Not just, uh-”

“Not just lying to get rid of me?” She leaned against the table and plucked a tissue from the box to dab at the shoulder of her robe.

He winced, both from being called out, and at seeing what his facial secretions had done. “Oh, geez, sorry about-”

“Nope!” She cut him off. “It’s all good. Just part of what happens, y’know?”

He hummed in response. “Yeah, I guess so.” He cleaned his glasses and put them back on. They made him aware of just how puffy his face felt.

“So…” Lup tapped her fingers against the counter. “What now? Do you wanna talk about it? Do you want me to act like the last few minutes never happened? I can make hot chocolate. I know a recipe that doesn’t use milk but still tastes good. Or, I know we don’t have multiverse-champion-cuddler Magnus, but I could probably initiate a pretty decent cuddle pile with everyone.”

What did he want?

“I think, uh.” He really just wanted to read until he fell asleep. “Not that those don’t sound pretty good- like, I’m definitely gonna take you up on that hot chocolate the next time we end up somewhere cold- but I think I’m just gonna hit the hay.”

“Yeah, I get that. Cha’girl usually drinks enough water to get rid of the post-crying headache and then… Well, then I usually make Taako talk to me until I’m asleep.” She headed to the door.

“Water, right,” he muttered to himself, rubbing at the ache behind his forehead.

“Hey, Barry?” she said. He looked up. “We’re not here alone, you know?”

He nodded, smiling a bit. “I think I’m getting that, yeah.”

“I meant what I said. It’s okay to have bad days. And it’s okay to need people.”

He didn’t know what to say to that, so he didn’t.

She turned and walked out the door, giving him a quick wave without looking back, raising the hand holding her book over her head. “Keep your chin up, nerd.”

He marveled that he was laughing after the day he’d had. The lab door swung shut behind Lup.

That was the first time Lup called him a nerd without it feeling like a barb.

In fact, maybe this time, he even liked it.

Something changed that day. Many somethings, perhaps. But to Barry, that would always be the moment he knew.

He would love her forever.

It was an inevitability.

#taz balance #blupjeans #barry bluejeans #lup #taz lup #lup taaco #the adventure zone #taz: balance #the stolen century #anxiety #mental health issues #Trying Not to Cry #pre-relationship blupjeans #social anxiety #anxious barry bluejeans #hurt/comfort #angst #light angst #fluff #my writing #barry bluejeans needs a hug

[daughterofsarenrae]

The Seven Birds: Can They Drive?

Taako- no. Refuses to learn on the principle that he is gay. He navigates instead and mans the radio. Also he's always had Lup to drive, and the thing about Lup is that...

Lup- loves to drive, and is very good at it. Is able to push a car past what normal people would consider it's limits. Insists on good seat belt etiquette. Keeps a cooler filled with snacks in the back. Has one of those plastic shopping bags wrapped around her gear shift as a trash bag. Keeps extra napkins in the glove compartment. Refuses to drive without music playing.

Davenport- fantasy stunt driver. He could be pulling the craziest stunts and it feels like you're going 40 down a straight flat road. Makes it look easy. He drives stick and uses his tail to shift gears. Everyone is jealous.

Magnus- do not get in a car with Magnus. He can actually drive pretty well, but he gets distracted by EVERYTHING. Pretty scenery, a funny license plate, a cool building. If there's a dog?? Forget it. Magnus isn't concerned with looking at the road anymore.

Merle- you know how old people drive? Like drifting into different lanes, swerving back, stomping on the gas to accelerate instead of gradually increasing speed? Merle drives like that, but worse. He knows he drives poorly, he just doesn’t care. Everyone has ridden with Merle driving exactly once. No more.

Lucretia- Is there anything Lucretia can't do? Of course she can drive, and textbook perfectly, too. She prefers podcasts to music while driving. She usually doesn't drive, though. She'd rather be documenting the scenery/wildlife/cities being driven through while throwing shade at everyone else's driving.

Barry- everyone thinks Barry would be a good driver. He's a nerd, and he's kinda nervous sometimes; surely that translates to knowing and following the rules of the road and practicing safe driving techniques. Barry is even proud to admit that he was the first person from his hometown to get a driver's license. But the man drives like a maniac. Barold Bluejeans does not fear death and his driving exemplifies that. In cities he's not too bad, but away from traffic lights? He's averaging 90 through a 40 mph highway. Has never in his life used a turn signal. Eats/uses his stone of farspeech while driving constantly. For some inscrutable reason, he refuses to turn on the air conditioning, so you have to get by on lowering all the windows. This results in having to shout to whoever you want to have a conversation with in the car. The worst part? He is completely unreceptive to criticism. The only way his driving is tolerable is when its just him and Lup, post lich-ification, because death wasn't as big of a concern.

#the adventure zone #taz #taz balance #ipre #the seven birds #listen i've been roadtripping a lot the past few days. Barry and Magnus are each partially inspired by my dad's driving. send help #bel speaks

[spenceraugust]

TAZNC Day 1

@taznovembercelebration

Selected prompt is italicized: Fake dating/ domesticity

See the month’s prompt list: https://bit.ly/2TUfDLC

Read it on AO3: https://bit.ly/38cjqMO

It had been two weeks. And- okay, when you really think about it, sure, that's not that long. Just enough to start missing someone, but not really enough to feel ready to head back to school.

Holiday break was over, and that meant two things. Midterms and Taako.

Taako's family lived far away- according to the blonde, they were from a small town called New Elfington on the West Coast. He hadn't been home in years, and no matter what he said, Kravitz knew he missed his sister. She and her husband had picked up a kid since the last time Taako had been home. Their grandfather had tested positive for Alzheimer's after  wandering into the woods and getting lost.  His cousin had opened a woodworking shop and got engaged.

He'd missed a lot in the five years since he'd been back, so Kravitz had been as understanding as possible when Taako broke the news.

He was understanding. That didn't mean he expected it.

"I think I'm going to go home this year," he said, using his French fry to push a chicken nugget around. The cafeteria food was garbage, and Taako hated it, and no matter how many times Kravitz said "hey, aren't you in culinary school? Maybe you should pack lunch."  His companion seemed rather insistent on partaking in the distribution of culinary war crimes.

(Kravitz was pretty sure he just liked to complain.)

"Oh?" Kravitz glanced up from his salad. "I- what about our mall date next week to last minute gift shop?"

"Sorry bones," He smiled sadly, "someone else will have to help me deal with the consequences of my actions."

"I mean- good luck, I guess-" Kravitz was sputtering, so he took a sip of his water. "I just- are you going to take a cab? I can't imagine that'll be cheap."

"Lup's got bridesmaids business at Julia's, and that's only an hour and a half away. We're going to pit stop it. They figured out something, I guess- Barry will drive me home and Lup will drive me back," He finally looked up from his lunch, "so you're in charge of holding down the fort until I get back. Promise to not clean my half of the room?"

"Taako," Kravitz placed his hand gently on the back of his best friend's. "I'm absolutely going to clean your half of the room."

Taako was, objectively, a bad roommate. He listened to music loudly, never cleaned his half of the room, had a tendency to invite people over and not warn him, and always seemed to go missing when dorm inspections were supposed to happen.

Kravitz still wasn't sure when he started developing a crush on him, but it was a secret he would take to his grave. He didn't spend the past three years becoming someone Taako trusted by saying every little thing that came to mind.

He was still ecstatic for Taako to come home. They'd never been apart for more than a couple of days. Two weeks was torture, especially when it was filled with aggressive smothering from his mothers. It was good to be back.

💕 Taako 💕 Be home in five, handsome!

His phone buzzed in his hand, and Kravitz nearly dropped it. He'd been sitting in his coat on his bed for the better part of an hour, debating whether or not he should go and wait outside. Was that weird? It felt a little weird. But it was Taako, and it had been two weeks-

Fuck it. He could play it off like he was going to get a coffee. Maybe he'd even get the chance to meet the mysterious sister he'd heard about for years.

And, as his luck would have it, apparently "be home in five" meant "I'm here, but it'll take a couple minutes to take stuff out of the trunk of my brother-in-law's beat up Subaru" (which, by the way, fully lived up to Taako's description).

"Oh, Taako!" He called, trying for pleasantly surprised as he raised a hand and waved. Taako glanced up and grinned, dropping his bag into the snow and jogged over.

"Hey handsome! Long time no see!" He called over the disgruntled cries of his two companions who had been left with the labour of unpacking.

"Hey, how was it?" Kravitz asked, striding towards him. "Did you ever end up finding a gift for Uncle Dav-"

"I need you to play along," Taako said in a frantic whisper, throwing his arms around Kravitz's neck and pulling him into a tight hug.

"What?" Kravitz hugged back instinctively.

"Do you trust me?" He asked, pulling away slightly.

"I hate it when you ask me that- yes?"

"Okay, then follow my lead," and then their fingers were intertwined and Taako was dragging Kravitz through the snow. He wasn't even sure what he just signed himself up for, but Taako looked like an angel in the snow. He could have told Kravitz to take a polar dip and he would have off principle.

"Thanks for leaving me with your heaviest bags, jackass," Taako's mirror image, presumably Lup, hissed.

"I'm sure Kravitz could have walked over alone," Barry (?) added.

"He could have, but I wouldn't let him." Taako grinned. "Give us a hand, bones?"

"Ah." His twin stopped him with a hand as Kravitz reached for a suit case. "Not so fast, we haven't even been properly introduced yet. My name is Lup."

"It's great to finally meet you," he shook her hand, "Taako's told me so much about you- I was starting to wonder if he was keeping us apart on purpose."

At that, she laughed. "Oh, probably- I'm sure he's worried I'll spill all his deepest secrets. Remind me to get your phone number before we leave. I need someone I trust to keep an eye on my little brother."

Taako squawked behind him, but Kravitz just smiled a little wider. "Absolutely. I'd like that."

"I'll have you know, Krav, I'm at least four minutes older-"

"They swapped the babies up, they don't know for sure, dingus-"

"Legally, my birth certificate says I was born first-"

"I'm assuming you're Barry?" Kravitz ducked out of the twin's firing range to head over to the middle aged man wrapped tight in a red coat and blue jeans. "Kravitz."

"You'd be correct in that- I'm Lup's husband. It's good to finally meet you- Lup and I have been discussing for a while what kind of person could possibly keep Taako entertained for anything longer than a week. He talks about you lots as well." Barry shook his hand firmly.

"Good things, I hope?"

"I think that's up to you to decide, bud." He shrugged, before turning back to address the twins, "Hon, we've got a long drive ahead of us. Why don't the four of us grab lunch before we head back to Elfington?"

"Thanks for the offer, Barold, but we're actually not done fighting," Taako said, slinging an arm over his sister's shoulder.

"Well, if you leave your bag in the snow like that, all your stuff is going to get wet," Barry gestured to a suitcase that had been lost in the chaos. "Let's finish unpacking quickly- I'll pay, is that what you wanted to hear, Taako?"

"It's exactly what I wanted to hear," Taako turned to Kravitz with a wide grin. "Come on, handsome, grab a bag. I'm hungry." ~~~~~~~~~~~~

("So, you've been roommates for three years?" Lup asked, picking her nails while she and Kravitz were alone in the elevator.

"Yeah, since freshman year." Kravitz nodded. "We've found that we get on surprisingly well."

"Clearly- I shared a room with my brother for eighteen years, and it's not easy," She nodded in agreement. "You gotta really love Taako to willingly put up with that kind of bullshit twenty-four sev."

Kravitz shrugged. "I mean, don't tell him I said this, but- he's Taako. He's worth a little bullshit every now and then."

"Huh," She broke out into a wild smile. "I think I like you, bones."

"You're not half bad yourself." He grinned, holding the door out of the residence for her. "We should hurry- a hangry Taako is not a fun Taako to be around.") ~~~~~~~~~~~~

("And how long have you been- y'know?" Barry asked, looking up through the rearview mirror of his car.

"Well, we started living together three years ago, but we didn't really start hitting it off until about six months after that," Kravitz offered, looking to Taako.

"He just needed time to warm up to the 'Taako-Kondo' organization method." Taako added.

"Dumping your things on the floor is not an organization method," Kravitz elbowed him with a smile.

"It is! I have a dirty pile, I have a clean pile, I have a school work I'm going to maybe finish pile, I have a school work I'm not going to finish pile-"

"Taako," Kravitz sighed in exasperation. "When we get back to campus, I am going to buy you a planner. There is no reason to not finish your school work."

"Uh, ch'yeah there is! I don't feel like it?"

"God," Lup groaned from the front seat, "You two bicker like an old married couple. Thank god we live five hours away, Bear- can you imagine lunch dates every week?"

"Forget how Barry feels," Taako leaned forwards to shove his head into her sightline. "If I had to go on a double date with you nasties every week, I'd lose my mind.")

~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

"So, what'd you think?" Taako asked, waving as Barry finally drove off. The sun had set, meaning that the two wouldn't be home until early morning. Taako had suggested that they stay the night in the dorms and head back in the morning, but Lup had adamantly refused. Said that Taako and Kravitz needed to catch up, and Kravitz would be lying if he said he wasn't a little relieved to have some one-on-one time with his best-friend.

"They're pretty great," Kravitz smiled. "I can see what you mean about Barry being a nerd, but I have to disagree with you calling Lup a tornado. She seems pretty cool."

"It's only the first day, handsome," Taako reminded him, linking their arms and heading towards their dorm. "She has plenty of time to prove herself as a walking disaster to you."

"I guess time will tell- she's got my number," He shrugged. "Hey, what did you mean earlier? When you told me to play along?"

"Oh," Taako dropped their linked arms as they stepped into the elevator. "Uh, about that- listen, I don't exactly know how they got to this conclusion, but Barry and Lup? Uh, they think we've been dating for a couple years. And, uh, I didn't know how to break the news? Because Lu seemed really excited? Something about you 'being the reason I haven't come home for a while', or whatever. I don't know."

Oh. Oh.

"Lup and I have been discussing for a while what kind of person could possibly keep Taako entertained for anything longer than a week."

"You gotta really love Taako to willingly put up with that kind of bullshit twenty-four sev."

"And how long have you been- y'know?"

"You two bicker like an old married couple. Thank god we live five hours away, Bear- can you imagine lunch dates every week?"

"If I had to go on a double date with you nasties every week, I'd lose my mind."

"Taako- oh my god." Kravitz gripped his roommate's sleeve.

"Did you- did you not realize?" Taako looked at him in surprise. "I thought those heart eyes were just for them. Did you really miss me that much?"

"This conversation is tabled." Kravitz flushed, shoving his still cool hands into his pockets. "Oh my god."

"No, let's talk more about how much you missed me, and why you looked like all you wanted to do was kiss me-"

"Tabled, Taako!"

"If it helps, I think you're really cute?"

Kravitz groaned. "I want to die, this is the worst night of my life."

"Well, I have an unlimited olive garden pass," Taako shrugged. "We could go make it better, if you wanted."

"Fine," Kravitz said, eyes still firmly on the elevator door in front of him and not on the blonde man that had just reached into his pocket to hold his hand. "But I'm getting a blue Hawaiian, and if you want any, you'll have to get your own."

"Babe, are you sure you'll even notice me drinking from it?" Taako teased.

Kravitz groaned again, and Taako laughed. "Kidding. Come on, let's get changed and then head out. Ch'boy's feelin' unlimited breadsticks."

#TAZNC #The Adventure Zone #fanfic #taakitz #fake dating #wintertime fic #ao3 #the_fanfic_train #long post

[suddenrundown]

                           All the Time in the World: Chapter 16 

Read previous chapter

Regeneration was always the same.

Like a movie on pause, they’d freeze, which was always uncomfortable and disorienting no matter how many times it happened, and then came the weird, uncomfortable pulling sensation that meant they were being put back to their recorded states. Lup always felt like it was instantaneous and never-ending all at once, but there thankfully was an end to it, and when she was back in control and free to move, she would reach for Taako’s hand to find him reaching back. And with her hand in his and the reassurance that they both were fine, she’d look in Barry’s direction, and always find him already glancing back, a comforting smile on his face.

This time, Lup didn’t look, and she knew he didn’t either. 

Continued under the cut, or you can read it on ao3

                                                              ~

Lup felt the cool evening breeze and sighed as she watched people walk by from her spot on a bench. None of them seemed to be in any kind of hurry as they lazily strolled into open shops and stopped to talk to each other. She heard a group of kids squeal laughing somewhere in the distance. They all just seemed...content.

Good for them.

“You feeling better yet?” she asked, looking over at Taako next to her.

With his head leaned back, Taako cracked his eyes open and slid his glance over to her, then closed them again. “Five more minutes,” he mumbled. 

“Told you not to eat so much,” she chastised with another sigh. 

“I was starved.” He opened his eyes again and picked his head up. “Somebody was hell-bent on practicing magic to the point of exhaustion instead of, I don’t know, eating lunch at any point.”

“We were on a roll.” Lup folded her arms and turned away, suddenly looking for a fight. “My bad, though, didn’t think an afternoon of magic practice with me would make you so grumpy and weird.”

“Right,” Taako grumbled, shifting again. “There’s only room for one of us to be grumpy and weird at a time.”

Well that took the wind out of her sails. She huffed out another sigh but didn’t say anything else, granting Taako another five minutes to work through his food coma from the restaurant they’d gone to for dinner. He deserved it, because he was right. Of the two of them, he wasn’t the one with the problem, but he was the one who had to deal with her for the past month. Taako hadn’t asked for an explanation and she had made no attempts at offering one. 

What the hell would she even say? “I fucked up and let my feelings for Barry make things super weird. And then he caught on and tried to let me down gently, but I was a big baby and couldn’t deal with that, so I ghosted him, which apparently didn’t bother him because he never came looking for me so I guess we aren’t friends now, and I don’t want to see him, but I’ll always have to because that’s just how our lives work”?

Yeah, she wasn’t gonna tell him that. 

“Sorry, Ko,” she said simply instead. 

With a grunt, Taako was suddenly on his feet then with a hand held out, offering to pull her up. “It’s all good. Come on.”

“We can stay a little longer,” she offered, staring up at him.

“Nah, I’ll just walk it off,” he replied. He wiggled his fingers, motioning for her to take his offered hand. “But let’s just take it easy when we get home, deal?”

“Deal,” she said, grabbing it and letting him pull her up. She’d find something else to occupy her time. 

They took off down the town’s dirt road, making their way just as slow as the rest of the people around them, both too tired for anything else. They had definitely overdone it, Lup realized, and that one was on her. She hadn’t really noticed how intense she was being about the whole thing in an effort not to think about Barry, and she silently promised to chill the fuck out and leave Taako out of her drama. 

Too tired to make conversation, she continued people-watching as they walked, paying very little attention to anything in particular until she noticed that they were slowly approaching a small group of people gathered on the side of the dirt path. The small crowd grew a little bigger as people exiting shops grew curious as well and wandered up. As she and Taako got closer, she could see that the crowd was forming a half circle around a halfling man, who had a black case for some sort of musical instrument at his feet. 

Lup heard the onlookers collectively chuckle at some joke the halfling must have told as he sat on a stool and reached down for the case on the ground. He sat the small case on his lap, unlocked it, and pulled out a dark red bow and then a black violin, holding both with care as he leaned to put the case back down. The halfling wiggled in his seat, feet not quite touching the ground, and lifted the violin to his shoulder. 

“Oh,” he said in a cheerful voice as he bent down on the other side of the stool and sat back up again, a gray patterned flat cap in his hands. He put the cap on top of his shoulder length, dark wavy hair somewhat theatrically, trying to get the angle right. “Aesthetic,” he explained with a laugh, earning him a few more chuckles as he lifted the violin once more. With a flourish, he moved the bow into position as well. “Stop me if you’ve heard this one,” he grinned, and then began to play as Taako and Lup passed.

“Hey Taako, are you busy?” a muffled voice asked, hesitant and gravelly.

Lup’s heart leaped and then immediately sank. Barry.

Taako stopped as he reached into one of the many pockets of his faded IPRE robe and pulled out his stone of farspeech. “Barold! Nah, not busy, Lup and I are just on our way back to our pad.”

“O-oh, right, you and, uh, Lup are...how is it there?”

“Eh, you know, it’s a place. With people and things.” He paused to glance at Lup, who hadn’t made any sort of sound and, even now, offered nothing to help Taako’s lackluster description of the area they’d settled in for the year. She absentmindedly fiddled with her stone’s string that hung around her neck, hoping she looked more chill than she felt. “No one’s trying to kill us, which is always appreciated,” Taako added as he eyed the string, and then his gaze briefly slid to Lup’s face, where she could tell he was looking at her hair. She’d cut it into a pixie cut and added a couple of red streaks through it at the beginning of the cycle. It looked rad, but she had a feeling that that wasn’t the reason Taako was taking notice of it now. She really had to come up with better coping skills. His expression didn’t change as he looked back to the stone in his hand. “Plenty of magic users, so we’re taking advantage.”

“Sounds like a good place to be.”

“It’s alright. How’s it where you are?”

“It’s amazing!” Barry answered, excitement evident in his voice, and Lup could picture him when he said it. 

Which sucked. She really didn’t want to.

As he launched into a no doubt long-winded explanation of his current life, Lup pretended to get distracted by the halfling violinist and moved away from Taako to join the crowd of listeners. The halfling was in the middle of a fast, jaunty piece that didn’t match the way she felt at that moment at all, but it was a welcome distraction from her thoughts. 

Honestly, she welcomed any sort of distraction. 

It had been so long since she’d talked to Barry. After that day in the lab, she laid low for the rest of the cycle and managed not to see him. She had no idea what happened with the experiments they were conducting at the Institute or if Barry even continued working there without her. She hoped she didn’t screw that up for him, at least. Maybe he came up with a good enough excuse for her absence and managed to do it. For her part, she kept busy exploring the city with Lucretia, working out with Magnus, and bothering Taako at work. 

It was a lot more difficult to find distractions in this new cycle, and the group had more or less split up. Barry was the first, actually; he’d apparently heard that there were powerful necromancers in some town or other, and jumped at the chance to go and study under them for the year. She and Taako had found that Torrine, the town they currently lived in, was a great resource for wizards with skills like theirs, and they knew that they could use a year to hone their skills. No matter how badass they already were, nothing they ever did was enough to stop the Hunger, which only seemed to get stronger each year. They had to keep up.

Merle had made comments about wanting to go Church of Pan planting this cycle, but it had been a month or so and she and Taako hadn’t heard from him one way or the other. Magnus, Lucretia, and Davenport had volunteered to search for the Light this cycle. No news from them, either. Lup assumed no news was good news, but she missed them. She knew that all she had to do was use her stone, but she also knew that it really hadn’t been that long and she was just out of sorts in general and didn’t really have anything to say to anybody. Still, it was a comfort to know that her friends were only as far as her stone.

Except for Barry, who she felt like couldn’t be farther from her reach.

The little crowd applauded as the halfling’s song ended, and Lup belatedly followed suit as the halfling started another tune, this one much slower and far less lively than the first. Lup didn’t have much experience with musical instruments and hadn’t really given the concept much thought, but there was something about watching this guy play. There was something so...graceful about it. Maybe it was how the instrument rested delicately under the guy’s chin, or how he maneuvered the bow across the strings. She really couldn’t pinpoint what it was. All she knew was that it was beautiful.

She didn’t notice that Taako had come to stand beside her until she felt him bump her shoulder.

“Barry says ‘hey,’” he told her as he watched the halfling.

Sadly, she doubted that. “I say ‘hey’ back,” she replied anyway.

They both stood and listened for a few moments longer before Lup reached up and thumped Taako’s silly, wide hat. “Let’s go pass out at home, shall we?’

“Sounds ideal,” Taako said as he readjusted the hat and they set off again, leaving the halfling and his violin behind. 

                                                              ~

“I really don’t think I miss dogs that much until I see them, and then it’s just like oh shit, that’s what’s been missing in my life!”

Lup laughed at the earnestness in Magnus’s voice, and a few people gave her curious glances as they passed her on the sidewalk. “I feel you.”

“I know it hasn’t been that long since we had that cycle where there was nothing but dogs, but there haven’t been any since then.”

“It’s a long time to go without.”

“Dav wouldn’t let me bring one along. Even for a little bit.”

“Aw, boo!”

“I mean, he’s right, how am I gonna take care of a dog?” Magnus conceded wistfully.

“Booooo!” 

She heard him chuckle as she turned from the shop window she’d been glancing into and continued wandering. “Boo.”

“Anything else going on with you?” she asked.

“Nah, not really. You?”

Lup began to respond in the negative, but stopped short when she got distracted by a vaguely familiar sight coming out of a little cafe on the opposite side of the street. A halfling man with wavy hair and a hat, this time a dark red instead of gray, skipped down the shop steps and took off down the street. 

“Lup?”

“Uh, yeah, nothing interesting to report,” she answered as she curiously headed in the direction the halfling had bounded off in. 

“Alright, well, I guess I’ll let you get back to it!”

“It” was now apparently stalking a halfling for no reason. “Miss you, Mags,” she said.

“Miss you too!”

She stuck the stone back in her pocket and continued tailing the halfling. After a few minutes, he entered a shop and Lup watched the door close behind him before she stood in front of the building. From the signage, it seemed to be a music shop. Made sense. Maybe he worked there. Lup found herself opening the door and walking in before she really decided to do so or could come up with a reason why. A little bell on the door tinkled as she did.

“Afternoon!”

“Hey,” Lup replied somewhat awkwardly as she glanced around at the various instruments that hung from the walls. She looked over and saw the halfling behind a counter, flipping through pages of some book, minding his own business. The exact opposite of whatever the hell she was doing. 

“Need help with anything?” 

“Uh, not really?” It came out sounding like a question, and she felt embarrassed by how awkward she probably sounded. 

The halfling glanced up. “Just looking?”

“Yeah...never been here before.”

“But you don’t need help,” he replied with an amused smile. 

“I mean…” She glanced over at a violin propped against the all. “Actually,” she pointed towards it, forging ahead despite her awkwardness, “you play violin, right? I saw you walking and recognized you from when you played on the street a few weeks back.”

“I do!” he exclaimed. “All the time! But not publicly all that often. Just when the mood strikes. Wait.” He raised an eyebrow. “I shouldn’t be worried that you followed me in here, right?”

“What? No, I wasn’t following you!” She felt her face go red, mortified. “Well, I guess technically I was, but your music was awesome and I just wanted to…” She had no idea how to finish the thought.

“So you’re not a crazy fan, you’re just a fan,” he said with a laugh, clearly not actually all that concerned by her presence as he came around the counter. 

“Of the violin, yes,” she clarified. “Or, I guess I am. Haven’t really paid attention before.”

“I’m honored to have been paid attention to,” he said, taking his hat off his head and giving a dramatic, sweeping bow. 

Lup chuckled, grateful that the guy took her social blunder in stride. He secured his hat to his head again and came to stand beside her as she gazed at the violin by the wall again. 

“So you’re not that familiar with the violin, huh?” he asked.

“Not at all,” she replied. 

“Hmm...would you like to be?”

She turned to face him “Huh?”

“This is a music shop, and I give lessons. I’d be happy to teach you, if you’re interested.”

Not what she’d been expecting, but when would she get another opportunity like this? Lup loved picking up new skills! And if she was looking for something to take her mind off of...everything, then this sounded perfect. “Yeah, for sure!”

The halfling smiled and stuck out his hand. “My name’s Zenrin. Friends call me Zen for short.” He paused then, seeming to consider something. “You can call me Zen,” he finished with a wink.

Lup took Zen’s smaller hand in her own. “I’m Lup. Just Lup.” She grinned. “It’s not short for anything.”

“Alright, Just Lup,” Zen chuckled, “when do you want to start?”

                                                               ~

Over the course of the next month, Lup spent much of her downtime at the music shop. Zen’s teaching style was pretty informal, and he didn’t seem to bother with things like schedules or actual spaces designated for learning. Instead, Lup showed up whenever and stood behind the counter, violin in hand, while Zen simultaneously taught her and ran the shop. It probably wasn’t a normal arrangement, but it worked for her. The flexibility let her have as much practice as she wanted. Which, as it turned out, was a hell of a lot. 

Violin was hard. 

“Hand in first position yet, Just Lup?”

Lup cut her eyes down to where Zen sat on a stool, tuning some other instrument. Her middle finger slipped from position and she took a moment to fix it before answering. “Um, I think so?”

Zen put his instrument down and stood on top of his stool to check her. “There you go, you got it. Now,” he grunted as he hopped back down, “what’s F-sharp?”

She raised her bow and, with face screwed up in concentration, moved it back and forth over the string, and then smiled triumphantly. It sounded pretty good!

“Beautiful!”

“Yeah?” she asked, excited.

“If I’d asked you to play B, that is,” he chuckled.

“Aw, damn.”

“It’s fine,” Zen said encouragingly. He looked up then as the bell on the door rang and a customer walked in. “Hi there!” he called, picking up the instrument he was tuning and walking off. “F-sharp, Just Lup,” he said over his shoulder.

“Wait-”

“F-sharp!”

As she watched him go, Lup dropped her bow arm and swung it back and forth for a moment before raising it again and hovering over the strings. Okay, F-sharp. That one was B, so this one-

“That’s G-sharp!”

Lup made a face that Zen wouldn’t be able to see over the top of the aisle and dropped her playing stance completely, electing to wait for him to finish his business before continuing. At least she was pretty sure which string it actually was now that she eliminated almost all of the other options. 

After a few minutes, the customer left and Zen came back, looking up at her expectantly. With a dramatic flourish, Lup raised both her violin and bow into position, found the string, and played it with just as much theatrics. She raised an eyebrow expectantly. 

Zen tipped the front of his hat (one of the many he owned; this one was dark blue) and lowered it down to rest on his chest. “F-sharp,” he sighed dreamily, “music to my ears.”

This, Lup knew, wasn’t so much theatrical as much as Zen was just like that; he seemed to just romanticize most things in life. “Thanks!”

“Now that you’re warmed up,” he said as he bent down to reach into one of the counter’s drawers, “ready to play a little?” He produced a couple of beginner practice books and lined them out on the wooden surface.  

“As long as you don’t pick one that’s super heavy on the F-sharp,” she joked.

“Actually,” he replied with a chuckle, “I think the heavier the better, don’t you?”

                                                                       ~

Sometimes, Lup offered to help Zen with odd jobs around the shop in lieu of practicing. She figured she owed him something, since he had insisted on her paying him nothing at all for the lessons, despite how often she argued the point in the beginning that she took up so much of his time and also, wasn’t this his job? He continuously claimed that his time was freely given and that he would be spending it doing much of the same had she not been there at all until she stopped bringing it up. The least she could do in return was help him out when he needed it.

“Apologies if you can’t match up some of the receipts described in the ledger,” he told her one day as he sat on top of the counter, restringing a guitar. “I’m not very good at being detail oriented.”

Lup looked up from the stool she sat on, receipts scattered and ledger open in front of her. “It’s cool, I’m figuring it out. This is making me think of my friend Lucretia, though,” she added. “I think she’d have a heart attack. She’s never missed a detail in her life.”

“Alas, if I only had my own Lucretia,” he sniffed.

The subject of the IPRE had come up on occasion, although Lup had given Zen a very watered down explanation. As far as he knew, Lup had a brother and five friends she was in business with, and that business would eventually need her back home. She might have felt guilty about not telling him everything and warning him about the Hunger, and she had for a while, but Davenport had called last week to inform her and Taako that they’d found the Light, so she figured Zen and this world would ultimately be fine and she had no reason to worry him. He knew very little about her life apart from some random stories about her friends, but she also knew very little about his personal life, so it seemed fair to her. She was grateful he wasn’t the type to pry.

“So there’s Lucretia, Taako, and who else again?”

Or, he mostly wasn’t.

“Davenport’s our boss, then there’s Merle, Barry, and Magnus,” she replied.

“Oh, yeah,” he said, and then lapsed into silent concentration.

Lup did the same until a few minutes later when he commented,

“You don’t talk much about Barry.”

She whipped her head up to look at him. “What?”

“Just an observation,” he replied, looking down at her.

“That’s not-I mean, sure I do!” She felt her face growing red.

“I’m not accusing you of anything,” he said, expression more somber than it generally tended to be. “I just realized I can think of a few stories about each of your friends, but I can’t recall one about him. You make all of them sound so lovely, I wondered what could be wrong about that guy that you wouldn’t talk about him.”

“There isn’t anything wrong with Barry,” she protested. “He’s smart, and he’s kind, and he’s loyal, super funny and like, a dozen other things, and he’s one of my best friends.”

He was, she remembered painfully.

“My mistake then,” he replied sincerely, that somber expression not quite leaving his face. “I meant no offense.”

“It’s fine,” she answered, and managed a small smile. “I’m not offended.”

He nodded and turned back to his task. Lup distractedly shuffled through receipts. 

“Someone broke my heart once,” Zen commented quietly.

“Barry didn’t break my heart,” Lup insisted, suddenly irritated. “No one did!”

“I wasn’t talking about your heart, Just Lup,” he said, turning to look down at her once again. 

“O-oh.” She pretended to flip through the ledger nonchalantly, willing her heart rate to return to normal and her face to stop feeling like it was on fire. “What happened?”

“There was a girl I loved that I couldn’t find the words to tell her how I felt. She got tired of waiting and asked me, but I still couldn’t do it, and the words I didn’t say drove her off.”

Lup knew she couldn’t really relate, but she did understand the loss perfectly well. “How did…” she swallowed a lump in her throat and tried again, still staring at the ledger. “How did you deal with it?”

“Violin.” Zen replied. “I spent hours composing, writing and re-writing, and perfecting a song that I thought would represent my feelings.” He moved his hand so that it rested on the page of the ledger, forcing Lup to finally look up. “What is music if not an expression of the soul?”

Zen saw the world through rose colored glasses. She never had, and certainly didn’t have the luxury to for the last 25 years, but she couldn’t help but ask anyway, “How’d that work out for you?”

He smiled then for the first time in the conversation and pointed to the wall behind her. “Oh, I played it for her and she married me.”

On the wall behind her was a picture she hadn’t noticed before of Zen and a halfling woman stuck to the wall. It was a candid shot of the pair laughing at something, neither one appearing to be at all brokenhearted.

“Cute,” she said with a grin as she turned back to face him. 

“I love her more than I love music,” Zen practically swooned.

“Do you want a minute?” Lup joked.

“No,” he sighed. He looked away from the wall back to her and picked up the guitar beside him. “My point is that music is meant to be a healing thing, and sometimes, if you let it, it can solve a problem you didn’t know could be fixed.”

Lup had no reason to believe it would ever solve any of the problems she had, and Zen might not either if he knew about them, but she nodded in acceptance anyway, and he turned to continue fixing his guitar, no doubt satisfied that he’d swayed just one more soul over to the power of music and its magical healing properties.

If only. 

                                                                 ~

The game of “let’s see how high we can get the pile of dishes in the sink” had gone on long enough, and even though Lup didn’t want to be the one who caved, she had decided to take one for the team anyway. It hadn’t taken that long after all, and as she rinsed the suds off the last bowl, gave herself a mental high five and reasoned that she was the true winner of the Lup and Taako household games. For reasons. 

She dried her hands off and then stepped back to look at her handiwork, grinning triumphantly. That shit sparkled. She needed to make sure Taako appropriately ooh’ed and ahh’ed. Also, she needed to make a dishwashing chart. 

“Oh, Taako,” she called, singsong, “guess what I decided?”

“So Taako,” a voice that was decidedly not her brother’s said from somewhere in the room, “I need your thoughts about something. And yeah, it’s about necromancy, which I know you said gives you the heebie jeebies, but hear me out, because-”

Barry again. Lup sighed and looked out into the kitchen to see Taako’s stone of farspeech sitting on the table. Barry chattering away, unaware Taako wasn’t listening. 

“Taako, Barry’s looking for you!” She waited a moment for him to reply, huffing out a breath when he didn’t answer. “Taako!” 

                                                             ~

Barry hadn’t really felt this excited about studying something new in quite a while. For one thing, it had been a long time since he’d applied himself this much in anything that wasn’t Light related, and that got a little monotonous on occasion. Also, no one he knew now or had ever met in his old life had been into necromancy to his knowledge, which gave him the silly feeling of being special. Granted, maybe the reason people tended to stay away from it was due to the fact that it was dark magic, but that wasn’t really an issue for him. Any type of magic could be dark if it was used incorrectly. It was all about intentions, and Barry had only the best of intentions. Hunger-defeating intentions, in fact.

Although that was only a theory. He had no idea if this would help in that endeavor at all, but everything else they had tried over the years had failed. Perhaps this would do the trick. “This”, however, was not much at all; his skill level was hardly anything to write home about yet. But he would keep at it until he became a proficient necromancer. 

He closed his eyes and concentrated , grasping for the feeling of that magic as he attempted to cast Chill Touch. When he opened his eyes, a misty, skeletal hand hovered in the air in front of him. It reminded him a little of Taako’s mage hand, but his hand could deal a much different type of damage, if he actually had an intended target for it. Excitement coursed through him as a satisfied smile spread across his face. This was excellent. 

The hand disappeared as he dropped his concentration on it. He suddenly wished he was home so that he could tell everyone about his new skill, and then frowned. The excitement dissipated like the ghostly spectral hand as he realized that he really only wanted to tell one specific person.

It had been so long since he had talked to Lup. Not since that day in the lab last cycle, and they were more than halfway through this one. It was all his fault. If he hadn’t been so weak and used the situation they were to play out his feelings for her, thereby using her…

He still felt like shit for that, and felt even worse when he realized she’d noticed. Lup didn’t come back to the lab after that day, in fact he never even saw her anywhere at all. She must have been so weirded out and upset with him for what he’d done, and he didn’t blame her one bit. He would do anything to fix it, to go back in time and make a different decision. Unfortunately, only one event in their lives was able to be reset over and over again, and it wasn’t that. So he had to live with the knowledge that he’d wrecked the perfectly good relationship he had with her through his selfishness of longing for something more. 

He scrubbed a hand over his face, willing himself not to get emotional. Again. He’d cried enough already.

Well, if he couldn’t tell Lup, he could still tell Taako. Taako was still willing to talk to him, so Lup surprisingly must not have told him anything about what happened. He felt a little guilty for capitalizing on that fact, but he was just selfish enough not to want to lose another one of his best friends, so that trumped the guilt, for the most part. 

Taako didn’t actually like talking about necromancy, he said it gave him “both the heebies and the jeebies”, but of the people Barry could talk to, Taako was the most powerful wizard and would have more to say on the subject. Right after he got done complaining about heebie jeebies, of course.  

Barry fished his stone of farspeech out of his pocket and walked towards his apartment balcony. “So Taako,” he said into the stone as he stepped outside, “I need your thoughts about something. And yeah, it’s about necromancy, which I know you said gives you the heebie jeebies, but hear me out, because I’ve been thinking. How well do you think it would fare against the Hunger? Not saying that my skills are anywhere near ready to take it on and win, but say I spent a few years on it. Wait, the Hunger’s not, like, a physical presence, right? It’s like, rainbow colored darkness. Geez, those words don’t even make sense strung together, do they? Anyway, I-”

“Taako’s not here, Barry.”

He almost dropped the stone. “Lup?” he asked, peering down as if he could see who’s frequency he was on. Wait, he called Taako, right? He had been thinking about Lup, and she was still on his mind, obviously, but he’d had the intention of calling Taako-

“Yeah, sorry, I don’t know where Taako is. He left his stone.”

“Oh,” he replied simply, and found he had no idea what to say next. There was a long pause before they both spoke at the same time.

“How are you?”

“I can tell him you were-what?”

He felt himself blush profusely, unsure why he’d blurted that out. “I um, I asked how are you?”

There was another pause before Lup replied. “I’m fine. Missing home.”

I miss you. “Yeah, me too.”

“Are...you doing okay?”

“Same old, same old,” he replied, which wasn’t true. He took a deep breath, steeling himself. “Hey, listen, I-”

“Oh, Taako just walked in. I’ll hand you off to him. See you at regen.”

“O-oh, alright, bye Lup.”

“Barold, if this is about necromancy, I swear on the pages of my best cookbook-”

The rest of Taako’s very long winded threat fell on deaf ears. 

Lup hadn’t even said goodbye.

                                                               ~

After Taako finished his conversation with Barry, Lup crossed her arms. “Way to just leave your stone lying around. Where’d you even go?”

“On a walk. Is that a crime?”

“No, but Barry called looking for you.”

Taako hummed. “He does tend to do that around this time every week.”

Lup blinked. “So you knew he’d call?”

“Figured he would,” he said as he turned to wash his hands in the sink. “But you were here, so you got to talk to him for a sec. So it’s a win-win.” He shut off the sink and turned around to face her as he dried his hands, seeming overly nonchalant. “Isn’t it?”

She stared back at him, trying to gauge if he really was as innocent as he was trying to sound. He didn’t crack, and Lup figured that Taako wasn’t really trying to meddle in her life. Probably.

“Yeah,” she finally replied. “Win-win.”

                                                              ~

With only a few remaining weeks left in the cycle,  Taako and Lup figured it was time to leave. They didn’t want to just disappear from the town without warning once regen hit, so Cap’n Port was coming to pick them up later that day and take them back to whatever city they’d been staying in. After packing up her stuff, Lup headed to town to say goodbye to Zen. 

“Thanks for putting up with me for an entire year,” she told him with a giggle.

Zen gasped dramatically. “Just Lup, how dare you! It was an absolute pleasure to spend so much time with you.”

“I mean, same,” she replied. “You’re a great teacher.”

“Which reminds me.” He picked up his violin case that leaned against the back wall and held it out to her. “I want you to have this.”

“No, come on, I can’t do that,” she protested, flustered. “It’s yours!”

He laughed and looked around. “Have you seen where I work? I have plenty to spare. Also, I will be absolutely shattered if you don’t, so please?”

“Okay okay,” she said hurriedly, taking the case from him. “At least let me pay you for it.”

“Have you ever received a gift before this moment? You’re terrible at it.”

“Thank you, Zen,” she replied, hoping that her tone conveyed as much gratitude as was due. “Really.”

He climbed to stand on top of his stool and smiled. “All you have to do is promise that you’ll keep practicing until you’re better than I am.” He held his arms out to her.

She dropped the case and hugged him, which wasn’t quite as weird as she assumed it would have been given that they’d never hugged before. “I promise I’ll keep practicing,” she said.

“And?” he asked expectantly. 

“And,” she continued, “maybe I’ll write a song for you at some point.”

“I have no doubt you’ll write your own song one day. But not for me,” he continued, pulling away to look at her. “I write plenty of songs for me. Write one for you, from your own heart. Those are the best kinds.”

“If you say so.”

“I do.”

“Alright then, she chuckled as they parted. She reached for the case and then saluted. “Bye, Zen. It’s been real.”

“Indeed it has, Just Lup,” he replied, sweeping his hat off his head for a dramatic bow. “Indeed it has.”

When the door closed behind her, she looked down at Zen’s violin case. Or, her violin case. She liked the violin enough that she’d definitely keep it up, but she doubted she’d ever get to a point when she’d be writing her own music. Seemed like a lot of work. 

And honestly, she thought wryly, what would she ever feel strongly enough to play?

#blupjeans #the adventure zone #taz balance #barry bluejeans #lup #barry x lup #lup x barry