#Taika Waititi DELIVERED | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bootleg-nessie · 4 months

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Things that will happen in the future (based on my own experiences with time travel):

***FAQs at the end***

*All of these observations are copied directly from my notes in roughly the order I took them in

*Don’t ask about the interchanging use of past/present/future tense, you know how that stuff is with time travel

Women just started all growing three boobs instead of two. Scientists baffled

Genetically engineered catboys (no literally)

The great pyramid of Giza has been converted into a Bass Pro Shop

The entire state of Rhode Island was bought by some rich tech CEO who promptly dug a 500 foot wide trench around the entire state so that it could in fact be an island. It was soon converted into the world’s largest parking lot

Pollution has gotten so bad that fresh oxygen is now delivered straight to most homes via a subscription service

Basic necessities such as food, water, and housing are now provided for free by the government, but only for the top 1% of wealth holders

Insulin now costs twice as much as rent. “Get fucked,” say pharma companies

92.6% of new electronic appliances now have smartphone integration and require a monthly subscription to use

Most billionaires have real estate on earth’s moon

As an ongoing film experiment, Taika Waititi successfully convinced a Nebraska man that he’s been raptured and is now in heaven. He actually got Truman Show’d and now millions of viewers tune in every week to watch God (played by John DiMaggio) manipulate Robert into confronting his own views, battle cognitive dissonance, and face the realization that he might not have been as good of a person on Earth as he thought he was

Carrots have gone extinct, as have highland cows

Species of extinct animals and plants now are being posthumously renamed after the billionaires and elites most directly responsible for killing then off

Researchers discovered a sentient colony of fungus off the coast of Chile, it prefers to go by Fleebo and appears to have a incredibly complex intelligence far greater than any other observed organic being

Nobody knows where Ireland went. It literally just disappeared off the face of the earth one day and nobody bothered to question it. The story couldn’t compete in the news cycle with the recent news about a company in China that made the first real life pokemon. An entire civilization of people gone and I’m the only one who seems to remember it or even care

Fleebo and its offspring have annexed Madagascar and are threatening any retaliation with nuclear warfare and “making The Last of Us a reality.” Nobody knows if Fleebo actually has the capabilities to do this, but after the Lovecraft incident we’re all TOO goddam scared to fuck around and find out

Large snails have replaced cats and dogs as the most common household pet. Snail culture has largely taken over the world, especially Japan

The president of the United States is now decided with an oiled up twerking competition. Most people were hesitant at first but this has produced vastly more competent leaders so now everyone just kinda goes along with it

With the cost of living crisis only worsening with time, selling tattoo space on your body to advertisers has become common as people struggle to afford rent and pay their bills

North and South Korea have reunited into “Korea 2.0”

Germany has split up into East and West Germany again

Belgium and France have been annexed by West Germany and renamed “Wester Germany” and “Westest Germany” respectively

The entirety of Florida is now underwater. Most of Kansas is too for some reason that scientists refuse to explain because they’ve “sworn an oath to the eldritch gods” and that “much worse things would happen” if they did

The melting ice caps in Antarctica unveiled a lost civilization of intelligent creatures descended from a species of lungfish, predating human civilization by millions of years. They planned on hibernating for another 10-15 million years to observe the course of evolution on Earth and are very very angry at humans for waking them up prematurely and ruining all of that with global warming

The politically correct term for lungfish people is “Dipnoid” but most people refer to them by a variety of slurs, such as “finwalker” and “kelp muncher” (not that they even eat kelp)

The Great Pacific Garbage Patch has now increased to nearly half the size of what was formerly known as Canada and has been colonized entirely by pirates (the flag is actually pretty cool). The pirate nation has the 17th largest economy in the world and is projected to surpass the United States in GDP

Africa is about 2% smaller. Nobody knows why. Most people point to Fleebo, who denies having any involvement

All human-Dipnoid interaction was promptly banned by most world governments, except for the GPGPRP (Great Pacific Garbage Patch Republic of Pirates), whom the Dipnoids rely upon extensively for trade

Scientists have used DNA from fossils to recreate other species of humans. We now live alongside them like we did for thousands of years before everyone besides Homo sapiens went extinct. Racism is at an all time high

Class C and above robots are now legally recognized by most progressive countries as people

The United States government has been exposed for secretly funneling billions of dollars into the GPGPRP and using it to fund terrorist operations all over the world.

A new major religion revolving around Dave Grohl has skyrocketed in popularity. Grohilsm is now the world’s largest religion, second only to Fleeboism

Scientists discovered a new continent in the Pacific Ocean, and then promptly lost it again. Most people are convinced this was just an elaborate practical joke, but scientists “swear it definitely happened”

For a brief period of about 30 years, everything in George Orwell’s 1984 happened almost exactly as written in the book. Literally 1984

It was revealed that Jeff Epstein didn’t kill himself. He actually faked his death and spent the next few years in a drug-fueled episode of psychosis making sock puppets in a cave in Italy and then molesting said sock puppets until he died from a sock puppet related illness

Bigfoot was discovered off the coast of Georgia doing cocaine with a congregation of alligators. When questioned, he said he normally lives in Montana and was only there on vacation. He is now a celebrity, and has been featured in a number of tv shows and films, two of which he won an Oscar for. Last I checked, he was a washed up actor living in Hollywood with a reanimated Neanderthal woman

The GPGPRP raided most of England’s museums with the object of “doing exactly what they did for the last few centuries” England was understandably furious, but the rest of the world found it rather amusing

England declared war on the GPGPRP, which it promptly lost after hackers brought down the entire country’s military overnight. Much like in the 21st century, England is the world’s laughing stock

The entirety of Luxembourg relocated itself to the moon

Russia attempted to take over most of Eurasia. In retaliation to the full global effort to stop them, they launched nukes at the world’s 600 most populous cities outside of its current territory. Most of the warheads were stopped in time, but a few major metropolitan areas got hit pretty badly, including Los Angeles, Hong Kong, Chengdu, Mexico City, and Istanbul. Japan was understandably super pissed that Hiroshima and Nagasaki got nuked for a second time

In the wake of the nuclear holocaust, Canada assumed control over what was formerly Russia and assimilated many of its citizens and leaders into its own society and government. Under the new rule of formerly Russian leaders, Canada became a puppet state for the second coming of Russia. It annexed much of the United States, Mongolia, China, and a handful of other countries, becoming “the world’s first megacountry.” Crungolaska now controls a majority of the northern hemisphere

As part of a practical joke by Adam Sandler, Tom Hanks was actually marooned on a desert island like in Castaway. He lasted less than a week before he died. When I left this era of the future, Adam Sandler was serving a lifetime sentence in prison for murder

Fringe groups of crows with above-average intelligence have started popping up around the world. So far they have been observed forming small communities, crafting relatively complex tools, using rudimentary speech, performing rituals, and creating music

Aliens visited earth and had a formal meeting with many of our world leaders, but decided to leave us alone for a few thousand more years because humanity is “not yet mature enough to handle the responsibilities of interstellar travel.” They have incentivized us with a the blueprints for an Alcubierre Drive and a means to produce the exotic matter to fuel it once they deem us as being ready

The original colony of settlers on Mars has declared independence, officially becoming the first country not on Earth

We sent Tom Cruise back to space but this time we just left him there

The tether for the space elevator broke. The town known as Vatorville, famous for being the location of the takeoff point of the elevator shuttle on Earth, was completely decimated as tens of thousands of miles of steel cable came crashing back down. There were no survivors

Most people in first and second world countries have mandatory microchip implants that serve as a personal ID

Last Thursdayism has been largely denounced by quantum physicists. Current theories now revolve around “Next Thursdayism,” the belief that the entire universe was created in the future and that we all exist as a memory in the past

Synthetic organ farms for transplants and research have become a massive industry worth billions of dollars. However, there is still a huge black market for organically grown human organs, as they’re much cheaper to acquire and aren’t taxed at the exorbitant rates that lab-grown organs are

China dug a hole all the way to the center of the Earth. Turns out it’s hollow and there are people living inside. Who knew?

A university reconstructed the entire city of Rome as it was in its early days during the Roman Empire. It’s actually pretty historically accurate, except for the fact that there’s a lot less sex because it’s run by a bunch of sweaty history nerds

After Rome 2 resulted in the creation of a cult revolving around the Roman god of the dead that gained traction as a minor religion, Pluto was officially reinstated as a planet by NASA when cultists picketed their headquarters every day for nearly 3 years straight. “Fine, we’ll give these fucking virgins what they want so they’ll finally shut the hell up,” said NASA’s administrator in chief

In a display of the biotechnical prowess of Disney’s Imagineers, all the animatronics in Disney’s Hall of Presidents were replaced with clones of the originals, which went about exactly as well as you’d expect. After reports of the presidents hurling a series of racial slurs and other obscenities at the first black family to enter surfaced, the project was shut down almost immediately after it had opened. Minority admission to Magic Kingdom plummeted to 2.3% of its numbers from the previous year, making it the second whitest place on earth after a taylor swift concert

Plastic now makes up about 3% of every organism on earth by weight

Public officials are now required by law to take shrooms before running for office

Trees are considered a rare and highly sought after commodity, and are usually only owned by public institutions and the rich (the vast majority of oxygen farms use algae to produce oxygen)

FAQs:

FAQ: What time period(s) did you go to?

A: I have no fucking clue. The world stopped using the Gregorian calendar in 2063 after a gamma ray burst hit the sun. The GRB led to stellar ablation, which changed the length of a year on Earth. The sun would continue to lose mass at an accelerated rate for several more years, with the length of the year changing slightly from year to year. The world adopted a variety of different calendars which kept being updated frequently and were often super confusing and contradictory. I traveled to about a dozen different points in time, which based on my best estimates spanned within a few millennia of the current date.

FAQ: How did you obtain a time machine?

A: I think it was the 17th or 18th of June, 2055? That night, a large sci-fi looking box thingy roughly the size of a VW Bus appeared a few hundred yards away in the open field in front of my house. I tried to take a picture of the box, but for some reason the closer I got, the more the image on my camera started to become fuzzy, and by the time I got close enough to take a decent picture, the camera had stopped working altogether. I pulled open a door to reveal a corpse inside that was charred beyond recognition, who appeared to have suffocated and/or burned to death during a fire that damaged most of the interior. I also noticed a number of strange tumors and growths on the body. I pressed a random button on the remains of what I believed to be a control panel, expecting nothing to happen, but the door closed automatically and I suddenly lost consciousness. When I came to, I exited the box, expecting to still be in the field in front of my house, but instead found myself a ways outside of a small snowy village that based on my best estimates, was somewhere in northern Asia around 2-3 thousand years ago. The villagers started coming after me with spears, so I quickly ran back to the box and pressed another button, hoping it would return me to from whence I came. This time, the people I found (who were thankfully much nicer and spoke a dialect of English that I could mostly understand) told me that it was the year 506 of the PGRB-Δ4 calendar (the calendar that the United Territories was using at the time). I repeated this maybe a dozen more times trying to get home until I landed in 2023, which as far as I could tell, was the closest I had gotten back to my original time so far. It was at this point that I decided to stay and seek medical attention, as I was rather concerned about some nasty new growths on my arms and legs similar to that which I had seen on the corpse.

FAQ: Where is the time machine now?

A: No idea. It disappeared a few days after I landed in 2023. My best guess is that some poor sap found it and ended up sometime else.

(I never ask for likes/reblogs but I literally spent fucking WEEKS on this one so if you liked it pls show me some love <3)

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rhysdarbinizedarby · 6 months

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Our Flag Means Death Costume Designer Breaks Down Season 2's Punk-Pirate Looks

Gypsy Taylor explains the surprising historical details that influenced the 'rule-bending' comedy's costumes

Rhys Darby, Our Flag Means Death (Nicola Dove/Max)

[Warning: The following contains spoilers for the Season 2 finale of Our Flag Means Death.]

Packing a ton of plot twists and emotional upheaval into a tightly paced eight episodes, Our Flag Means Death just concluded its tumultuous second season. Season 2 ends on a heartwarming note, with Ed "Blackbeard" Teach (Taika Waititi) and Stede Bonnet (Rhys Darby) settling down to open an inn together. This gives fans a satisfying happily-ever-after if the show ends here — although showrunner David Jenkins intentionally left things open for a potential third and final season, teasing a team-up between Stede, Blackbeard, and pirate queen Zheng Yi Sao (Ruibo Qian).

Along the way, Our Flag Means Death continued to deliver its unique brand of historical storytelling, offering a chaotic mash-up of 18th century sources and modern themes. Working in tandem with theatrical visual effects and a soundtrack featuring Kate Bush and Nina Simone, costumes play a key role.

To cap off the season, TV Guide spoke with costume designer Gypsy Taylor. Among other topics, we discussed Stede and Blackbeard's evolving wardrobe, the historical research behind characters like Zheng Yi Sao, and Taylor's favorite unsung costuming details among the supporting cast.

This season there's a lot of journey to the costumes. Characters are experimenting with self-expression. I'd like to talk first about Stede, who starts as a caricature of a foppish aristocrat, but looks a lot more practical this season. What was the vision for that look?

Gypsy Taylor: The story is that he's lost everything. Blackbeard's gone on a heartbroken rampage and he's destroyed everything that looks like Stede on the ship — which would include that wonderful wardrobe. You know, like how you'd throw your boyfriend's clothes in a box out the window.

Stede was on his boat heading to the island at the end of Season 1, just wearing this one outfit. We see him in a filthy version, he's been living in it for two or three months. Rhys [Darby] was a little bit disappointed because he was like, "Do I get to wear any rings?" And I was like, "No! You've lost them all!" Then as the season starts to go on, he starts stealing some other pirate clothes and he starts to get really sexy and come into his own gorgeous pirate self.

And he gets that cursed suit.

Taylor: The cursed suit was so much fun! That's the first time in months that he's seen something beautiful like what he used to own. It's on this Spanish ship, so we went with a dandy matador look. Rhys put the calico version of that on in the fitting room and instantly embodied this character. He was flicking the tails and spinning around and he stood up straighter and his butt clenched… It was magic to watch.

I love that dandy side of him. There's a lot going on in terms of gender presentation with the main guys. They're both trying to escape toxic masculinity, but Stede's also chasing this idea of being a badass, and then Ed is doing the opposite because he abandons his leathers. I'd love to hear your thoughts on that, and how Ed is for half the season wearing things like sackcloth and linen.

Taylor: The leather is very constraining, and it's very much his persona of Blackbeard. To lose all of that means he's lost his toughness, and that exterior that's sort of like armor. So we went straight for the opposite end and just put him in a rice sack that he'd made into a jumpsuit. The idea behind it was that Wee John had sewn it because he'd started to learn to sew and knit — the concept being that there [were] rice sacks below the decks, which was very common in pirate ships.

Once Buttons turns into a seagull, his clothes were left behind on the ship. So Blackbeard takes those linen clothes, and he's like, "This feels right, this is kind of light."

I don't know if you're able to speculate about Season 3, but given the symbolism of Ed's leathers, do you think we've seen the end of that outfit, or is it going to stick around?

Taylor: I can't say anything to Season 3, but I do know that in the finale the leathers magically come back. I had a conversation with [showrunner] David Jenkins because he says, "Well, we have to end the show with him wearing his Blackbeard leathers, that's what we all know of him." And I was like, "How the hell has he gotten them?" You know he's thrown them off the boat, into the ocean, never to be seen again. And David just turned to me and went, "He's Blackbeard, he can do anything." I thought that was pretty funny.

Taika Waititi, Our Flag Means Death (Nicola Dove/Max)

That's exactly the kind of fairy-tale logic the show thrives on.

Taylor: We often refer to it as Looney Tunes. It's not exactly historically correct. Funny sh-- happens and we all sort of took on that Looney Tunes theory of like, episodes change and something appears and then it doesn't.

The good thing with costume and pirates is that the way they get their outfits is they just steal them. So whatever we came up with, I was like, "Oh well, they run into a French ship and they've stolen a great leather jacket." Costume elements could appear based on that rule that pirates steal anything.

I'd love to hear a bit about the crew's looks. The show does a really good job of illustrating their personalities, but this season a lot of them also have this makeover where they start out wearing Blackbeard's goth/punk outfits, then change into something more comfortable.

Taylor: Characters like Izzy and Fang were already established in the Blackbeard gang, so we didn't change them too much. With Fang I added extra sperm whale teeth and extra studs. I got rid of his shirt and we covered him in tattoos. Time had passed and he'd evolved a bit. Izzy was very classic, so we didn't need to change him at all. He was pretty adamant not to be evolved as the other guys had been.

Frenchie and Jim, which are the biggest transformations we see, they've spent months at sea with Blackbeard, who is a tyrant. He's made them wear head-to-toe black, and they've had to piece together outfits from around the ship. So Jim is covered in all these ropes to make them look tougher, and their belt is a giant fish hook. Frenchie's an artist, and he's stolen a beautiful leather jacket — he's brought the little flag element into the back of his jacket with some embellishment. Then Archie just looks like she's picked out of a crowd of pirates from the Republic of Pirates.

As far as the other characters go, we continued on from Season 1 and just kept their same outfits, but three months later. They were stuck on an island, so I gave Wee John a little necklace that he'd tied out of old rings that he'd found. And we gave Olu some shells and pieces that they could've crafted on the island.

Once we see them all go to Zheng's ship, I wanted to keep elements of the Zheng uniform. So you see with Black Pete, he kept the shirt but ripped off the sleeves and got some new pants, and Roach kept the pants. It starts to become like a mesh of all the little adventures that they've gone through, or the trauma that they've gone through.

Our Flag Means Death (Nicola Dove/Max)

I love the contrast you mentioned between Izzy and the others. All the other characters are having fun experimenting with their looks, and Izzy is so static. Do you think he's more sure of his identity?

Taylor: Definitely sure of his identity, you nailed it there. He's also very sentimental, like he's got his mother's ring around his little scarf. You know his glove on his hand, he wanted to keep it on that hand and I was like, "Shall we add some studs to it?" And he was like, "No no, keep it as it is." He's just very much about routine and rules and sentimentality.

Even for Calypso's party, I was like, "How far do we wanna go?" Everybody's dressing up and covering themselves in flowers. Once we learned that he was singing La Vie En Rose I was like, "I think we should keep it classic." Just put a little rose here, and Wee John's done your makeup, and you'll look classic and beautiful.

This show has a really fun relationship with historical accuracy. I was interested to read that you do a lot of historical research, maybe more than other members of the creative team. How do you decide which characters should look more historical and which ones are more anachronistic?

Taylor: I always started with the historical first. I actually didn't know much about Captain Zheng, so I got really into the history of pirates. I would always start there, with that 18th century historical moodboard of the paintings that were done of them, or the etchings. Then I'd add our rule-bending concept, which was to make everything a bit more rock 'n' roll and a bit more streets of New York in the '80s.

I was able to push completely out of the historical, and put things like safety pins and screen-printing and bleach. You know, zips and studs, and all these things that are very 20th century costume elements, but on an 18th century silhouette.

Is Zheng based on a specific 18th century outfit?

Taylor: There's one really specific [etching], she's wearing those Chinese pants. I looked at a lot of 18th century Chinese work uniforms as well, I looked at one from a collection from a museum. We copied that exact neckline of an 18th century Chinese smock. The same with the shoes. I looked at some workers' shoes from the 18th century, and they had those kind of black ballet flats with a woven bottom and little white socks.

I was using beautiful Chinese silks and Japanese embroidery techniques that were used in the 18th century, and sort of mish-mashing it all together because she would travel the Silk Road through Egypt and Morocco, and collect all these fabrics.

Same with Anne Bonny. Again, there's some etchings of the real Anne Bonny — quite a famous one with her gun and her pants. I was like, "Oh yeah, I wanna start there and then I wanna sex her up a lot," because her and her girlfriend have a really great S&M relationship, really sadistic. I wanted to bring that fetish element into her. That's where the corset came from. We based that on an 18th century corset, but made it leather because it was more pirate-y.

The twist on her was that David Jenkins came to me and said, "This episode is basically Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?" And I was like, "Great, I love that movie!" So I went home and watched that movie, and noticed that Elizabeth Taylor has this beautiful necklace and this patterned blouse. I was like, "Let's recreate this pattern on Elizabeth Taylor's blouse," which is set in the early 1960s. So we recreated it and then made an 18th century blouse.

Driver Minnie and Rachel House Our Flag Means Death (Nicola Dove/Max)

I feel like this season the villains are the most historically accurate. There's this contrast: Ned Low and Prince Ricky have a formal look, like with the British naval uniforms, and then the good guys have this anarchic vibe.

Taylor: Yeah, I never really wanted to mess with the uniforms. That was actually a really fun one to get historically correct. We had the proper frock coats and the heavy wools, and the heavy brocade. Ned Low and Ricky were very much straight out of an 18th century historical book. But then with Ricky, I gave him the one black lace Madonna-meets-Michael Jackson glove, just to mess with it a little bit.

With Ned Low, once we had his beautiful Paganini-inspired 18th century suit on, David Jenkins was like, "I just picture him being silver." We painted his suit silver, and then art department and props came up with a silver violin, and makeup put these silver teeth in. So he's instantly turned into a rock star.

Finally, are there any little details that you'd like to highlight for viewers?

Taylor: One of the background characters that I love the most is one of these pirates when Stede is the maitre d' at Spanish Jackie's. His first encounter with a customer is this horrible swearing pirate. I'd been listening to a pirate podcast that morning on the way to work, and I was learning all about how many rats were on board. I was like, "I reckon that pirate should just have a whole jacket made out of rats." That's what you'd do with all the dead rats, right? You'd have a little fur bolero.

I asked one of my team members to make me like a hundred little fur rats. She'd hand-sewn all the tails and little feet and ears. Then we built this vest and they covered it in blood and dirt, and made it all like wet rats that had been living at sea for a hundred years.

That's the kind of thing you might see a fan wearing at a convention, a really specific background character.

Taylor: God, I hope so. You'd have to get in real close to see there's actually little tails all over the whole thing.

I'm trying to think of another really sweet thing. That whole Silk Road thing was really interesting to me. I found this museum piece of a necklace that was all these little leather satchels that collected little pieces along their travels. We started making this beautiful piece, and we ended up giving it to Auntie. It's these little trinkets from Japan and Egypt and Morocco; she wears all her souvenirs around her neck close to her heart. There's a lot of little things like that where we go into great detail and I give a little backstory, but maybe no one will ever notice. Or they might! You never know!

Our Flag Means Death Season 2 is now streaming on Max.

Source: TV Guide

#rhys darby #ofmd #our flag means death #taika waititi #behind the scenes #gypsy taylor #costumes #tv guide #ofmd s2 spoilers

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knife-dad · 2 years

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Watching Taika Waititi take over as "guy in charge of delivering queer representation" for marvel (and maybe star wars?) Is kind of like... like watching an invasive species find a highly specific ecological niche and absolutely FLOURISH despite the odds, except that I'm not mad about it, if anything I am highly entertained. You go you funky little (allegedly) straight man, be the pigeon of Disney franchises. Make star wars gay, I believe in you

#this is especially funny because it seems to be an entirely self-assigned role #and its unclear if it's because he himself values representation (likely)#or because he likes defying authority and queer representation presents a new challenge (equally likely)#in any case. i love it. im having fun #thor love and thunder #text posts to the void

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uniiiquehecrt · 7 months

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IT GETS WORSE.

Did you have to tell the Russo Brothers, who will be inheriting your Thor? Oh, I know. I’ve talked to them. We’d show them footage of him because they’d heard we’ve got a really different Thor. I love those guys, but I’m not gonna stress myself out trying to save Thor for the Avengers movies. My plan was just to strip him down and mess him up as much as possible, and then just sort of deliver him to their doorstep: “Here’s this messy version of the character that you thought you were gonna have.”

We’re talking a lot about this tone and the comedy, how does it then reconnect to what the plot of the movie is about? I have no idea. Honestly, I gave it a little bit of thought, but sometimes, often I was like, You know what? I’m gonna let Marvel deal with that. That’s their department. I know how to tell a story, but I’m having so much fun subverting all of this, and like telling weird jokes and making this the weirdest Marvel movie ever. If you’ve seen my movies, you don’t hire me for any reason other than what I’ve done. So Marvel’s job really is to look after their characters, look after their source material, and make sure I don’t completely break it, or it doesn’t negatively affect the rest of the movies or how they all interweave. I don’t understand that, and I’ve never watched all those movies with the eye of like, Oh, how does this link up? Oh, what year was this when, like, Fury encountered this thing?

(SRC.) / GOOD ONE: TAIKA WAITITI'S THOR: RAGNAROK

#I DON'T EVEN HAVE WORDS.#I AM IN ACTUAL TEARS OVER HOW AWFUL THIS IS WHAT THE HECK IM SO #salt to taste #&&. meta #anti taika waititi #anti thor ragnarok #&&. | marvel. |#&&. thor.#THESE ARE JUST THE WORST MOST OFFENSIVE PARTS #THE ENTIRE INTERVIEW IS AWFUL #IT'S SO BAD #IT'S BEEN 6 YEARS AND I'M STILL FINDING MORE INFORMATION ABOUT THIS DUMB FILM AND IT'S SO #I'M IN A G O N Y

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christinecalella · 3 months

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oh, i'm steaming

I am profoundly sad and mad about this cancellation. OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH was a breath of fresh air, like nothing else being made on TV right now. David Jenkins, Taika Waititi, Rhys Darby and the whole cast and crew made something weird and wonderful and wholesome with this show about killers and thieves. I admire them so much.

On a personal note, the pure love & enthusiasm surrounding this show is a big reason my debut novel sold. If you’re mourning the queer rep & body-positivity of OFMD, I would so appreciate it if you checked out my book, THE FINAL CURSE OF OPHELIA CRAY (coming from Page Street YA on April 9, 2024). This book is a YA pirate adventure very much in the spirit of OFMD, especially in terms of queer rep, neurodivergence and body-positivity.

THE FINAL CURSE OF OPHELIA CRAY is the story of two half-sisters, Ophelia and Betsy. Ophelia is the daughter of an infamous pirate queen, but she was raised alongside Betsy by their father. The local townspeople absolutely haaaaate her ass because they think she's cursed. Meanwhile, Betsy is a homebody and incredibly talented seamstress struggling with anxiety. Ophelia decides she'll be best-served by going to sea and making a new life for herself in the navy, but wouldn't you know it, the navy won't accept the daughter of a pirate.

Naturally, Ophelia does what anyone would do: she steals her sister's identity to join the navy anyway. As one does.

When a family crisis reveals to the navy that Ophelia's committed fraud, Betsy needs to conquer her many, many fears and take to the sea in order to warn Ophelia before she gets caught and hanged for her crimes.

On the way, the sisters make friends & enemies, battle in pistol duels & set ships ablaze, struggle through hurricanes and pirate attacks, travel to distant shores and magical islands, discover long-lost relatives and fall in love.

It's a story about sisterhood, legacy, and self-acceptance. Plus, it's chock full of queer characters and body-positive representation, just like OFMD! Ophelia is canonically aroace and Betsy is a plus-sized woman who finds true love at sea.

If any of this sounds up your alley, consider pre-ordering the book at any of the links below the Read More! Nothing helps first-time authors more so I'd really appreciate it. Adieu, beloved crew-mates!

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-final-curse-of-ophelia-cray-christine-calella/1143329910?ean=9781645678724

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wonderfulworldofmichaelford · 11 months

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Is It Really That Bad?

Come. Gather round and listen to the legend of the Funny Vampire Director, AKA the Funny Nazi Director, AKA Taika Waititi.

Raised in the way of the director, Waititi was taught to make good movies, delivering the sort of funny and heartfelt films most can only dream of making. He directed, and he wrote, and he acted. He was sensitive, like a smile. And his love of filmmaking did not discriminate in what he could make. He once made a hilarious vampire mockumenatry that got a spin-off TV series. Another time, he proved that you could make Blazing Saddles in the modern day, except with Nazis!

But Waititi's greatest achievement was cameoing in The Suicide Sqaud. Oh, wait. No. It was making a good Thor movie, of all things. But sadly, in making a good Thor movie, he set himself up for failure with the sequel. In fact, he set himself up for spectacular failure. Mediocre reviews. Audience backlash. Criticism from the actors and directors. And bad reviews from all sorts of internet guys, again and again and again. And again.

Poor Waititi had to watch the internet’s respect for him explode. And then he said, 'What have I done?' It seemed that everything he’d worked for with Thor, he lost. And so he maybe got fired by Marvel and went back to making real movies for a change. But just because he was done with Marvel, didn't mean he was done with superheroes. He teamed up with James Gunn and set off to deliver the most powerful and thematic line in The Suicide Squad. He got in shape, putting in the hard yards to become a respected filmmaker again. Taking pains into gains and never skipping the chance to direct a movie based on Tower of Terror. He put in the work to go from the butt of jokes to a guy who would hopefully deserve an Oscar win.

But with all that being said, there was still a confused reviewer just trying to figure out if maybe the backlash to Thor: Love and Thunder was a bit overblown. Because really, this movie couldn’t possibly be as shitty as The Dark World, which committed the sin of wasting Christopher Eccleston. So he sat down and gave the movie a rewatch, accepting he was only good for one thing... Determining that age old question, 'Is Thor: Love and Thunder really that bad?'

THE GOOD

So maybe this is a hot take, but I really did enjoy Jane’s return and her romance with Thor and find it to be one of the film’s best aspects.

Now, don’t get me wrong, a lot of the writing here is clunky and poor Natalie Portman is saddled with a lot of really stupid dialogue now that she’s the Mighty Thor. But seeing her and Chris Hemsworth act off each other again in a less dull and restrictive fashion is so nice, and seeing Portman kick ass is a lot of fun too. She even wields Mjolnir in some pretty creative ways here! And her death is actually a genuinely powerful and touching scene that they don’t immediately fuck up with a lame joke.

The soundtrack, while not even close to touching the Guardians of the Galaxy soundtracks, is filled with Guns N’ Roses banger after banger. I grew up listening to these guys, so honestly I’m predisposed to like any scene where they play one of my favorite tracks by them.”Sweet Child O’ Mine,” “November Rain,” “Paradise City,” and “Welcome to the Jungle” are all whipped out at just the right time to keep my attention from flagging completely, so I’ll give them props for that. They aren’t the most inspired choices, but I’m a sucker for classic Axl.

The Axl above? Decidedly less so. Still, despite this film’s reputation for really bad effects and really bad costumes and just in general looking embarrassingly cheap because Disney abuses the animators, there are some extremely cool visuals here and there. The shot of Falligar the Behemoth in particular is so good they slapped it into every trailer, and a climactic battle on a monochrome planet looks way too good to be in this movie. But by far the most fantastic thing is the comic-accurate depiction of Eternity.

And of course, I would be remiss to not praise Christian Bale’s performance as Gorr the God Butcher. The man immediately has you hooked with the opening scene, which details his backstory and shows how he began his vendetta against all the deities of the Marvel universe. Then we have his fantastic climactic confrontation with Thor on the black-and-white planet, and then there is his final scene before Eternity. Each and every time he shows up, it’s completely clear that Bale is giving it his all and acting his pussy off, giving a performance that is honestly kind of astounding considering what’s going on around him.

THE BAD

Unfortunately, while Gorr is a fantastic performance, he suffers from the fact his character has absolutely no cohesion and is barely in the film. He shows up for maybe one big fight in the first hour, then completely disappears from the film until the third act, during which time he just sits around with a bunch of children and terrifies them. And despite being “The God Butcher,” we see him butcher precisely one single god in the whole film, and that’s in the film’s opening. Groot has as many onscreen god kills as Gorr. That’s fucking pathetic. Bale’s magnificent performance is strong when it counts, but so much of the dramatic moments feel unearned because he hardly does anything outside those moments. The fact they cut out so much material including him meeting with Peter Dinklage’s King Eitri and Jeff Goldblum’s Grandmaster, really stings. Would it have been a crime to cut out those annoying fucking goats and instead give Gorr more to do like, oh, butchering gods?

It doesn’t help that the story never actually refutes any of Gorr’s points. Every other god we see in the film is egotistical, hedonistic, a coward, or all three at once, with even Thor reverting into a corny blowhard for much of the movie. Zeus is pretty much emblematic of this problem; while I actually did enjoy Russell Crowe’s performance (even if it is, ultimately, a half-baked attempt at recapturing the magic of Grandmaster from Ragnarok), the fact that Zeus is nothing more than a blowhard more concerned with orgies and showing off to all the other gathered deities just kind of proves Gorr right. The gods don’t care, they are refusing to help their followers, and frankly the universe would probably be a lot better if it was littered with Knowheres instead of having these horny clowns prancing about.

Then we have the Guardians. The glorified cameo from the Guardians of the Galaxy that was hyped up in all the marketing. Despite being in the movie for maybe ten minutes and despite Star-Lord having 95% of all the lines between them, nearly every single one of them feels completely out of character. Star-Lord, on the other hand, actually feels like he was rerailed in time for Gunn to take the reigns back, but it doesn’t make up for how awkward and pointless it all feels. Although it is incredibly hilarious that after all of them spent Infinity War fawning over him they all now seem to barely tolerate him, with it being confirmed none of them kept in contact with him after the events of this film. I honestly don’t blame them.

A lot of returning characters really suffer. King Valkyrie gets it pretty bad since her subplot where she searches for love was dropped, leading to her feeling really superfluous in the plot. Lady Sif gets it even worse, with her barely even being in this movie; one has to wonder why they even bothered keeping her alive. Thor gets hit especially bad here, because he seems to have reverted from his post-Ragnarok characterization all the way to pre-Thor characterization, with all his hedonism, goofing, gallavanting, insecurity, and egotistical traits ramped up to maximum levels.

But the most divisive returning character of all is Korg. Korg became a fan-favorite due to his appearances in Ragnarok and Endgame, where he was genuinely a funny comic relief character who juxtaposed his intimidating rock golem design with a friendly demeanor and the chipper voice of director Taika Waititi. The thing is, both of those films used him sparingly, so that when he got a lame joke it wasn’t so bad because it’s one up against dozens of good ones. Here though he gets to be a main character and even the narrator, and boy does he get old pretty quickly. The thing is, though, that even if he’s not particularly funny here… I still like Korg. He’s just too damn charming, As lame as his jokes are, as lame as his fake out death is, as pointless as he ends up feeling to the plot, I just can’t hate the guy. I guess it helps that he gets to be Disney’s 52nd First Gay Character, but actually for real this time because in the end he gets to make a baby with a rock guy named Dwayne. I also really like the theory that the reason the whole film is corny is because Korg is narrating it, and he’s an unreliable narrator peppering the story with lame jokes and underplaying elements that should matter. Does it save the whole movie? No. Does it make Korg any funnier? Also no. Does it add an interesting layer that at least keeps me from wanting Korg dead? Yes, yes it does.

And really, every single problem here is something that was there in Thor: Ragnarok. Zany comedy? A terrifying, threatening villain with a murderous vendetta who gets weirdly underplayed and barely interacts with the heroes? A villainous character played entirely for jokes? Jokes that completely and utterly destroy the tension of any given scene? The big difference is that in Ragnarok, at least some of the jokes were funny, and Thor had more interesting characters to bounce off of. And maybe most importantly, that film knew when to dial back the comedy to let cool or emotional moments breathe. And maybe even more importantly than that, it knew to keep Korg to a minimum. This film doesn’t do that at all, with nonstop gags undercutting nearly every dramatic moment. It’s ultimately hard to give a shit about anything going on when the characters give so little of a shit about it that they’re cracking jokes.

And let me tell you, if you couldn’t already tell, the jokes are fucking bad. This is basically what would happen if you asked Seltzer & Friedberg to make Marvel Movie. This is the epitome of all those jokes about Marvel dialogue having the characters go “Well that just happened!” to the point where I’m shocked it’s not actual dialogue. The horrendously unfunny screaming goat meme is a pivotal plot point in this movie; that’s the quality of jokes we’re dealing with here. And while there are a few decent jokes here and there, there’s just too many fucking jokes to pay them any mind.

IS IT REALLY THAT BAD?

Somehow this is one of the most overhated and yet rightfully disliked films ever made.

Like, Schafrillas was right to call this the Shrek the Third of Thor films. It’s not funny, it derails beloved characters, it’s incredibly annoying, it wastes a good villain, and the writing is just so hackneyed and ridiculous. This is absolutely not a good film at all. But the way you hear some people talk about it you’d think this film killed their grandma.

Like I know bad comedies are some of the worst kinds of films out there, and this film is definitely horrendously unfunny at every opportunity, but it has just enough good ideas and just enough strategic deployment of Guns N’ Roses songs that it just barely manages to be passable in my eyes. I definitely think this is a mediocre movie, and it is emblematic of everything a bad Marvel movie can be. But at the same time, it manages to be unfunny in ways I didn’t think were possible from a director and cast this talented. I’ll be honest, on my second watch through of the movie I was more bored than infuriated with this film. It has its moments, but it’s absolutely one of the weakest efforts Marvel has ever put out.

This film is pretty much what critics once accused Batman & Robin of being: An overindulgent, campy, unfunny smear on a cool hero. As you well know by now, I don’t agree with them on that, but it’s a somewhat fitting descriptor for Love & Thunder. I don’t think it’s a smear on Thor, who has been way too inconsistent for me to get mad about him being taken in some wild direction, but overindulgent, campy, and unfunny are pretty apt. Still, I don’t think this is nearly as bad as a lot of people say. It’s not bad in a “crime against humanity” way, at worst it’s bad in a “I know the people making this are capable of better and I kinda feel like this is the fault of studio executives at Disney” kind of way. If you like it, sure, that’s valid! I don’t think there is no value in this film at all, especially compared to some stuff I’ve reviewed for Is It Really That Bad. But if I never have to see this movie again, I won’t exactly lose sleep over it, and I’m sure many people feel the same.

Still, I’d have to have a heart of stone to not find the ending, which features Thor and his adopted daughter (played by Hemsworth’s own daughter) becoming a cute little superhero team and getting a corny title drop right before the credits, really sweet. Yeah, it’s not a good movie, but at least it’s better than the first two Thor movies or the unseasoned oatmeal that is Eternals.

#Is it really that bad #IIRTB #Thor #Thor: Love and Thunder #Taika Waititi #Chris Hemsworth #Natalie Portman #Christian Bale #Marvel #Disney #MCU

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londonspirit · 7 months

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December, 2022. At Kumeū Film Studios, just outside Auckland, an amusingly contrasting combination of high and low-tech filmmaking methods are being employed on the set of pirate series Our Flag Means Death.

Inside a massive soundstage, atop the gargantuan, full-scale pirate ship Revenge, Taika Waititi, as Ed “Blackbeard” Teach, performs a scene with co-star Con O’Neill, who plays Ed’s surly first mate Izzy.

Surrounding the ship is a giant “volume” wall comprised of 1700 LED monitors displaying a photorealistic ocean background with rolling waves. As a crane-mounted camera weaves around, the images on the digital display move with it, creating a seamlessly integrated backdrop.It’s about as cutting-edge as filmmaking gets these days (the Star Wars shows rely upon this technique), but just out of frame, a crouched stagehand is manually wiggling the ship’s sails to indicate the wind. The human touch still has a role to play amid all the expensive technology.On the day the Herald has visited, it’s near the end of a long, exhausting shoot for the second season of Our Flag Means Death. But you wouldn’t know it from the upbeat vibes on set, which bustles with craftspeople and technicians. At one point, Waititi leads everyone (including visitors) through a quick set of squats to keep the energy levels high.In addition to starring, Waititi is directing this particular episode, having been drafted in when the intended director was felled by Covid-19. The Kiwi Oscar-winner is famous for the loose, improvisational touch that shines through in all his work, and it’s fascinating to witness his process first-hand. Throughout the scene being performed, Waititi tries out endless versions of every single line. Even in the same take. O’Neill, clearly used to this method, waits patiently to deliver his dialogue as Waititi cycles through options within the scene. Some of his improvised bits are obviously just to get a laugh from the crew, while others seem to involve him working through the point of the scene in his head. Sometimes, the scene resolves on a light note. At others, it is dramatic. It keeps everyone one their toes.

But this show has been full of surprises from the get-go.

Based on the true story of Stede Bonnett (Rhys Darby), who abandoned British society and his family to embrace the pirate life in the early 18th century, the series initially presented as a gentile comedy with an impressively diverse cast. But throughout the first season, which was filmed in Los Angeles, it quietly became one of the queerest shows on television.

Although there was nary a mention of the possibility in the advance press, Stede and Ed ended up in a surprisingly tender - well, sometimes - romantic entanglement with each other throughout season one. There are other queer relationships, and one character, Jim (Vico Ortiz), was revealed to be non-binary.

Unlike some shows that feature LGBTQIA+ representation, Our Flag Means Death didn’t trumpet its progressive values - it simply let the characters and the story lead the way, and is all the richer for it. It has received much acclaim for these elements, garnering Glaad Media and Peabody Award nominations.

It’s also partly why Madeleine Sami was so excited to join the series in season two, playing a pirate named Archie.

“I think that’s the brilliance of this show,” Sami tells the Herald later that afternoon. “Because it is a funny, silly comedy, but then there’s some really important stuff happening underneath. The progressive stuff is incidental in a way that makes it feel more revolutionary. Just being able to see queer characters as lead characters in comedies is a cool thing.”

Sami originally met with creator David Jenkins about directing an episode, but it was eventually decided to stick with season one’s roster. Then the opportunity to audition for Archie came up.

“Archie’s a very happy-go-lucky pirate,” says Sami. “She has a bit of a mysterious backstory, which you get little tastes of, but she’s pretty chill. She likes to party, she likes to pirate.”

All acting can be tied back to childhood play on some level, playing a pirate especially so.

“Honestly, I pinch myself so many times on this job,” says Sami. “It’s the role you dream about when you’re a kid, to get to play a pirate.”

Sami says it’s the biggest production she’s ever worked on in New Zealand, but the expensive trappings don’t impact the process.

“It’s a workplace comedy about pirates. So it never feels like that stuff overwhelms it.”

She’s also relishing the chance to muck around with her old mates Waititi and Darby.

“I’ve known those guys for a really long time, and I think they’re both doing really incredible work on this show. This group of actors are just bloody idiots, and so lovely and playful.”

Another Kiwi comedy staple, David Fane, has been part of the show since season one as Fang, a member of Blackbeard’s crew.

“It was just fantastical,” he tells the Herald of originally getting the role. “The best part was meeting all these other people from all over the world and finding the comedy in all these different communities; people of colour and also the rainbow community. Just the best buzz. I felt like a kid in a candy shop.”

Seeing the show move to New Zealand for season two (thanks in part to the NZ Screen Production Rebate for International Productions) only enriched the experience.

“To be here, and to actually do it back home, was just the biggest buzz,” enthuses Fane. ”To have people like Samba [Schutte] and Joel [Fry] and all the others come to see this part of the world and do some work here. The overseas cast are in love with Whittaker’s chocolate, as all good people should be.”

Fane, who also appears in Waititi’s upcoming comedy movie Next Goal Wins, reckons the second season is next-level.

“In the first season, everyone was finding their feet. And in the second season, people are walking assuredly. It just gets betterer - story-wise, and also honesty-wise and fun-wise.”

#our flag means death season 2 #ofmd s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #spoiler #our flag means death #ofmd #article #nz herald

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