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#That I sadly did not hear ACTUAL Michael Sheen reading the letter
hellandholywater · 3 years
Text
Because I can't find this posted anywhere on this hellsite, and it needs to be.
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Found on Twitter
Edited to add image ID courtesy of @drumkonwords​, under the cut. Edited Dec. 26 to add back the two photos of the letters that I somehow deleted, and to fix several typos in the image ID.
ID:[ a screenshot of a Twitter thread by user Henry Sotheran Ltd @sotherans.
First tweet reads: did our bookshop just get delivered a cease and desist from aziraphale (crying laughing emoji)
@neilhimself and @terryandrob the fandom is out of control, which I have no complaints about but good heavens
[Attached are two images of the pages of a handwritten letter. The paper appears high-quality, with a marker at the top that reads "A.Z. Fell and Co. Booksellers. Greek Street. Soho. London." Next to the letter is an envelope with a blue and gold wax seal and a business card.
The letter reads:]
18th December 2020,
My Dear Oliver,
I hope you'll forgive the familiarity when we haven't been properly introduced! I've been following your Twittering for a little while and have been delighted by your adventures in bookselling and navigation of the social medium. I trust this missive finds you well, and that the present unhappy situation of the world isn't weighing too heavily upon you.
I should say, to begin with, that this is not in any way your fault. Rather, a combination of circumstances: your highly engaging accounts of life at Sotheran's and my — upon reflection, inadvisable — decision to place the word 'booksellers' quite so prominently outside my own place of work, have lead to a troubling increase in potential customers.
For some inexplicable reason, certain people have latched onto
[The second page begins:]
(Onto) the idea that you and I are one and the same, conflating your excellent promises with my own, and consequently are under the impression that I am eager to attract codex-starved bibliophiles from far and wide. I suppose it's too much to ask that people understand the nuance of the title of bookseller, especially when it comes to books of rare or antiquated nature.
While I am undoubtedly a bookseller, it does not immediately follow that I am eager to sell books. At least when someone attempts to adopt a pet or a child, there are stringent checks upon the prospective home. But I digress. I wonder if I might prevail upon you to dispel any misperception among your followers that we are of the same being. Even a very brief on-the-line statement would help.
I would be tremendously grateful and gladly redirect any custom that strays through my doors your way, should you desire.
Sincerely, and with warmest wishes,
Aziraphale
p.s. Crowley politely declines to apologize for Pompeii or Herculaneum.
[End letter.
The second tweet reads:]
I have never witnessed such talented trolling in all my life, EVEN THE SEAL IS BEAUTIFUL, they had business cards made up
[A keysmash]
@Mr_AZ_Fell did you do this
[Attached is an image of a business card. In stately serif font it reads:]
A.Z. Fell and Co. Booksellers. Rare and antiquarian books bought and sold. By appointment to his majesty King George the Fourth. 29a Greek Street, Soho, London. Telephonic enquiries welcome.
[The third tweet reads:]
it was even delivered by someone who looked suspiciously like Crowley in disguise
is this it
has my life peaked
it can only be downhill from here
[The fourth tweet reads:]
the business card and embossed envelopes have slain me
like
you can't just order a single one of those
(Crying laughing emoji)
[The fifth and last tweet is a quote of the above thread by Neil Gaiman @neilhimself. It reads:]
Not that it should need saying but this is nothing to do with me or with @GoodOmensPrime or @terryandrob. Which does not mean we are not all in awe. It just means we are blinking with delight and bafflement too.
End image ID.]
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