Hey
Can you please write a Joe x wife reader where Joe and reader have been trying to get pregnant for a while and then reader finds out their pregnant and tells Joe in a cute way and he can’t contain his happiness
Pairing: Joe Burrow x fem first person
Words: 1600
Notes: since it’s my bday week and I’m having so much fun writing, I’m trying to get out fics a little faster this week! :)) thanks for the Request. <3
My eyes filled with tears as soon as I flipped over the pregnancy test and saw those two blue lines on the ClearBlue test. For 7 whole months Joe and I have been trying to get pregnant. We started after our wedding, hoping to see those two blue lines within two weeks, but two weeks turned into a month, and one into seven. Every single time we flipped over that test and saw one line and not two, we tried our best to stay positive, but it was hard. There were so many tears and I felt like we should just give up. I didn’t know how many more times I could take Joe’s same speech over and over again about how no matter how long it took, we would have our little family one day.
But now I was pregnant. I didn’t have to look into Joe’s eyes and tell him we weren’t pregnant for the millionth time. I didn’t have to stare into Joe’s blue eyes while he tried to hold back tears of sadness and watch as the hope was slowly draining from him.
As I looked up at myself in the mirror, tears rolled down my face and onto the counter under me. I was going to be a mom. It felt surreal to look at my stomach and realize that there was a little growing baby inside. I put my shaking hand over my mouth and I couldn’t stop looking at those 2 blue lines and at myself in the mirror. I couldn’t believe it. I felt like I was on top of the world and thinking about telling Joe in just a couple of hours when he came home from practice overjoyed me. “I’m pregnant.” I told myself, not able to contain my excitement.
For the next two hours, time seemed to be going so slow. Every time I looked at my phone and expected a half an hour to pass, only ten minutes passed. I was restless. I wanted to tell Joe so badly. I wanted to see the look on his face when he realized he was going to be a dad in just nine months. Not only were we going to be parents together, but I would get to raise a child with the most amazing man ever who isn’t just easy on the eyes, but is an incredibly person inside and out.
When I finally got the text from Joe saying he was on his way home, I practically sprinted upstairs and to my nightstand drawer where I kept a little mini Joe Burrow jersey and laid that down on the bed with the test on it. From the moment we started trying to get pregnant, I knew that I wanted to surprise him with his little jersey for our little son or daughter to wear when they’re born.
I sat on the bed and tried to pick through my different emotions. I was nervous, anxious, happy, worried, but mostly excited. Excited to be a mom. Excited to start our little family. From the moment I fell in love with Joe, I knew I wanted to create a family with him and now that was becoming a reality. Before we knew it, we’d have a little mini Burrow running around the house acting like a fool, and I couldn’t wait. Hey, maybe I was even carrying twins.
Before I knew it, I heard the front door swing open and just like clockwork, Joe said, “I’m home.” As soon as he said this, I couldn’t hold back the tears and started to cry some more. I just couldn’t contain the excitement. “Jordyn?” Joe called out, sounding a little worried, wondering why I wasn’t running over to give him a hug and ask him how his day was like usual. I wiped off a tear and sniffled back the tears a little bit. “Up here.” I answered him and stood up to meet him by the door. As I walked to the door frame, I could hear Joes footsteps getting closer and closer. My heart beat so incredibly fast in my chest and I couldn’t stop smiling.
As soon as Joe came into view and saw me crying, he dropped the bag that he was holding immediately. “hey, hey, are you okay?” He asked me and wrapped my in his arms. One hand was placed around my waist, pulling me closer to him, and the other was placed on the back of my head. With a smile, I wrapped my arms around his neck, running my fingers through his hair he decided to grow out for the season. “Everything is more than okay, Joey.” I said. Once I said this, Joe pulled back to look me in the eyes and once he did, I noticed the slightly confused look on his face.
Leaning forwards, I placed a small kiss on joes lips and then let out a breath I didn’t even know I was holding in. “Go look on the bed.” I said. Joe looked past me and at the bed and noticed something laying on it, but I could tell he was still confused. Dropping my arms from around Joes neck, he slowly let go of me as well and walked closer to the bed. I followed after him, waiting for him to realize that he was going to be a dad.
A small gasp left Joe’s lips as the realization that I was pregnant set in. I couldn’t help but smile as he reached down and grabbed the pregnancy test. After a few seconds, I walked to the side of him and watched as he ran his fingers over the mini jersey while holding the pregnancy test in his other hand. As I studied Joe’s face, I started to get nervous. There was almost no emotion or expression on his face. What if he changed his mind about kids? What if he didn’t want me to be pregnant right now.
Before I started to freak myself out more, Joe looked over at me with those gorgeous, tear filled blue eyes. “Oh wow.” Joe said simply as his bottom lip began to quiver slightly. I sucked in a breath at his reaction and started to cry more myself. Joe put his hand on his chest and took a step back, taking everything in. He kept looking at me, then the pregnancy test, me, then the pregnancy test. “I’m going to be a dad?” Joe asked me excitedly. “You’re going to be a dad.” I said, wiping off a tear that streamed down my cheek. The both of us started crying more as he closed the distance between us and wrapped his arms around me. Without me expecting it, he picked me up off of the ground gently and spun around in a circle, a little excited laugh leaving his mouth. I giggled while up in the air before he placed me back down on the ground.
Once down on the ground, we both held each other so incredibly tightly, so overwhelmed with the news. I buried my head in Joe’s chest and I could tell he was crying quietly. Unlike every other time we flipped the test over, they were happy and relieved tears. After so long of trying and feeling like nothing would work, he was finally going to be a dad. “I can’t believe this,” Joe said and pulled his head back, revealing his red eyes and nose, “our little baby’s in here right now.” He said, letting out a deep breath while looking down at my stomach.
It was hard for me to talk because of the tears. I opened my mouth to say something, but I knew if I tried to talk I would cry harder. With a smile, Joe took his hands off of me for a second and swiped his thumbs under my eyes to catch the tears before holding my face gently in his hands. He nodded with a small smile, letting me know he understood what I wanted to say. Letting go of Joe, I did the same thing and swiped under his eyes, getting a laugh out of both of us before gently grabbing his wrists, the both of us just gazing into each other’s eyes. I took a deep breath and let it out with a small laugh.
“We’re gonna be parent’s, Joey. Can you believe it?” I asked him. Joe just shook his head and looked back at the pregnancy test. “No. No, not really.” He chuckled and sniffled a little. “At least we know why you were sick this morning before I left for practice.” Joe said. “I totally thought it was those crab legs, they looked a little bit odd.” I giggled. Joe laughed and nodded. “They did look a bit funky didn’t they?” As we looked into each others eyes, Joe looked at me like I was the most beautiful, fragile, perfect women on the entire planet before closing the distance and placing a kiss on my lips. When we pulled away, we rested our foreheads together while making eye contact. “I love you…and our baby,” Joe said and looked down at my stomach, “more than anything in the entire universe.” Joe said. “Even SpongeBob?” I joked with him. “Yes, even SpongeBob.” Joe laughed and nodded. “Well in that case, I love you…and this baby,” I said and glanced down at my stomach like Joe did, “more than anything in the entire universe as well Joseph Lee Burrow.” I said.
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ᝰ.ᐟ 📦 — C.SC ; ! with you
sfw / nsfw is included ! minors do not interact 18+. [ fluff & smut ] ꩜. | missing my husband sue me
“you were just missing your boyfriend.”
you were sitting on the couch, sleep deprived you missed your boyfriend, so much he was gone on a tour for what? two or three months you were going crazy at this point.
yes he sent you flowers & gifts but nothing could compare to the warmth of his body laying next to you cuddling.
you were bored of living the same day every single time, since he toured away, waking up, taking a shower, eating, walking kkuma then seeing a tv show & sleep, even you didn’t have energy for friends, you just needed your seungcheol.
i mean he called you but not always, sometimes you’d wish you jump of the screen that your call was ongoing with.
being brought back to you reality by the roaring sounds of the tv, that was playing some random series you had watched, but what really caught your attention was kkuma barking, ‘she was probably hungry’ you thought.
following the sound of her, you went to her “kkuma sweetie come let’s get fo-“ your heart stopped.
he was here. seungchol was finally here. everything you had on your mind had dropped.
you ran into the warmth of his arms, hugging him tight, “thank god I was loosing my mind” you mumbled “I missed you too, my love” he chuckled embracing your hug lovingly.
after breaking the hug, you kissed each other deeply with so many different emotions of love, warmth it was so passionate that the more you indulged him the more safe & comforting you felt, nobody ever made you feel loved like him, choi seungcheol will always be yours to love & care for, you hoped he felt the same towards you.
“someone’s eager hm?” he teased smiling. you just went back to kissing him, eventually you guys went to the bedroom to continue your little love session.
exploring every inch of your body is what he did, making sure kiss every place his hand touched, “think you could get on my lap princess?” he said, you of course obliged, grabbing the flesh of your thighs, he let you settle on his lap, your hands wrapping around the soft nape of his neck, both your chests pressing against each other.
his hands began to roam once again from your back going up & down till reaching the sweet spot of your ass, squeezing them then pulling down your pajama shorts & panties.
fingers sliding down against your flushed bum he went in, in your cunt, brushing through your folds then pinching your clit slightly just enough to make it feel good, you tilted your head, burying it in his neck then letting out a moan after his cocky tricks “i already waited enough, please just fuck me good” you whined
casually ignoring you, he went back to playing with your pussy, he played with your clit a bit but found your hole then continued to tease by lining the tip of his finger in & out your already wet hole, arousal was dripping out of it.
he pushed his finger in your needy hole then quickly after doing so he added another, a third following shortly, you felt so fulfilled you couldn’t ask for more, his fingers did not compare with yours to when you & his’s rather many steamy phone sessions.
working with the magic of his fingers he pushed in & out of you while you sat there squirming with whiny & breathy moans following with it, “s-s’good cheolie” you pushed down on his fingers that were stretching you open, the feeling of his digits in you feeling ethereally amazing, scissoring his fingers inside your cunt, he came in contact with your sweet spot, fastening his pace he began began to hit your walls just by his fingers imagining, that if it was his cock made you even more fucked out for wanting his dick.
already feeling an urge to cum you moaned out loudly then cum came squirting out of your wet pussy. “god my baby’s been desperate already squirting on me huh?” he said pulling out his fingers then licking your sweet liquids that came splurging out. “never fails to taste good” he moaned amused sucking every last bit of it, you couldn’t deny that was fuckin hot of him.
“please lemme ride you seungcheolie?” you asked desperately wanting to do so.
“of course you can, sweets” he gave you the green light, you quickly discarded whatever he was wearing from pants to shirt, he now completely naked & may I say very hard, his cock itching aching to be inside of you.
sliding down on his cock was a hell of a time the feeling of his length, welcoming the warmth of your insides was so amazing.
you began to bounce on him, breasts bouncing with you underneath your little top that you had worn, seungcheol saw how gorgeous you looked on top of him, wondering how he got a beauty like you as his lover.
seungcheol grabbed your waist with his hands he’d thrust up as you went down making sure that he’ll hit all your special spots, when the both of your hips snapped against each other both of you would let out lewd moans & groans.
“god this pussy was made for me” he groaned throwing his head back continuously thrusting upwards to meet your hips once again deepening his cock inside your tight cunt. after a couple of minutes your hips gave out on you, so you just started to hump on him, he however just snapped his pace to an inhuman level making you loose your mind only one thought was in your mind it was him.
the knot tying inside your stomach, moaning more loudly than ever the mmphs, the non-understandable words coming out of your mouth “s’cheolie m’gonna cum” you yelled out cum rushing out of you for the second time.
slowing down his pace to give you a little rest “feeling good angel?” he caressed your face gently, you only nodded embracing him with a huge hug, you sighed softly “missed you too much cheol, don’t ever go away” “I’ll talk you with me next time, promise.” he spoke then adding “but baby, don’t you think your cheolie deserves to cum?” he looked at you, pulling his cock out then flipping you & fucking you tons of rounds till the only thing you could say was his name. seungcheol.
knowing that you would wake up sore with tons of love-marks,but you were okay, you loved every single bit of that night because you were with him.
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PAC: What's next in your love life?
Here is my love ahead spread, where we're going to look into what is coming for you in your love life, having singles or people in non-committed or early stages of the relationship in mind.
The reading doesn't contain any info on gender or orientation.
As always, this is a general reading meant for multiple people, there are only 3 piles, so it might not apply 100% to you. Take what resonates and leave out the rest.
I'm available for private readings and have a ko-fi. Free readings are currently closed at the time of writing this.
PILE 1
Cards: 7 of Pentacles, 7 of Cups, Judgement, the Tower, Knight of Wands, 8 of Swords, the Sun, 4 of Wands, Ace of Cups
We'll start by looking at your current situation regarding your love life.
It seems something has been growing in your love life for a while now. I'm thinking the early stages of a relationship or a crush situation. Zooming out, the growth seems steady, but it's possible that it wasn't so smooth when you look at it on the day to day. Some days might have felt like take 2 steps backward, and the next day you would move forward again. As a result you might be loosing your patience a little, ignoring the fact that things are indeed moving forward, even though not as fast as you want them to, or not exactly the way you want them to. You're eagerly waiting for things to take up speed and finally reach some type of harvest that you've been craving for. I also see you as somewhat passive, waiting for something to happen on its own. You're not necessarily taking any decisive action, but rather going with the flow of things and observing your relationship build slowly. Overall you feel quite impatient.
With the 7 of Cups in the position of things going for you, I think you have a tendency to get lost in your daydreams and illusions, regarding love and love interests. However, you're fully aware of that and actively de-fogging the whole thing. I see you trying to remain realistic and not too much in your head. I think that's a process that you had to learn the hard way. You're learning to pick up on the truth and discard the lies, which is quite painful and not a growth that happens in a straight line. Inside all this mess, there are nuggets of wisdom you're determined to find. It's like, either it helps you clear the way for this specific relationship, or it just makes you a healthier human, which is a win win situation.
However for what's going against you, I think you still have a tendency to put the blame on others instead of understanding that the current situation is your doing. If you're unsatisfied with the pace of things, you have choices. You can either wait and find peace in that, or move on to pursue something else. Whatever it is, don't wallow in misery because you feel frustrated and let resentment boil within you against your person, yourself, or the situation. What I'm trying to say is that you're refusing to make the call and pick a path to follow with determination, and instead you keep going back and forth in your head and creating a terrible emotional state for yourself. If you keep waiting for a sign in a passive and hopeless way, things will not change.
For what to take in in this situation, I see the need for a big wake up call with the Tower. I know this card has a bad rep but I think here it's mostly an indication of the intensity of the shift you need to do. It is paired with the Knight of Wands which is a clear indication that you need to take the reign and pursue what you want, taking a risk that things might collapse as a result. Welcome illusions being stripped away, let go of lies and take the risk to reveal your true self.
I asked for a clarification and got the 8 of Swords, which shines light on this state you need to wake up from: the fact that you keep yourself in a state of powerlessness when you have the means to cut your bonds. Really, this state of stagnancy is your doing and you need to own up to the fact and get out of that hole. Whatever you decide to do, you need to shake things up drastically and take a more active part in your love life.
What you need to release with the Sun, I get the idea that you're a bit too childish and immature when it comes to love matters, or at least in this situation. The card shows a child on a horse, but unlike the knight of wands who is in full control of his mount, the sun-child is merely waving his arms around and not doing much. It looks quite comical and does not embody a serious partner one might want to pursue. So I'm getting again the idea of the need to be more serious and committed, and releasing this naive mindset that things are going to fall on your lap without you doing anything at all.
For the most probably outcome in this situation, with the Four of Wands I was drawn to look up the astrological correspondence of the card and I got Venus in Aries, which is quite funny since Venus is currently in Aries until April 29th 2024 (writing this on the 23rd). I don't necessarily think this means everyone will find an outcome within the next few days, however, it does point out at changes happening presently, or as a direct result of this Venus in Aries season. Which again puts the idea of acting and stop wasting time.
It's also fun because it points at a very fiery approach to love, much like what the Knight of Wands was suggesting. Instead of worrying whether they love you or not, whether you should move on or not, you're being advised to go and find out. With the 4 of Wands as this placement in the tarot, there is an idea of celebration and coming together. The characters on the card are inviting, as if to welcome you in their circle, or hinting at a festive event or a gathering. A positive outcome is definitely possible, and if not, it's the opportunity to move on from heartache and find a better future with your heart unburdened.
The underlying energy is presented by the Ace of Cups, which definitely speaks of an exciting time for romantic feelings, where feelings are being birthed and coming to light. There is opportunity for a renewal in this connection.
PILE 2
Cards: The Devil, the Lovers, the Queen of Swords, Ace of Swords, 8 of Wands, 9 of Cups, the Fool 10 of Cups, 2 of Wands, 6 of Swords, 3 of Cups, 3 of Wands
We'll start by looking at your current situation regarding your love life.
With the Devil as you current situation, it is possible that you're crushing on someone or are in a non-committed relationship with someone that is loaded with sexual energy. However, it also points at an obsessive dynamic in the relationship which fosters an unhealthy atmosphere. It is clarified by the Lovers and the Queen of Swords, so I think there might be someone in this relationship hoping for love, and someone with their walls up, appearing cold and distant, even if there is physical intimacy at play here. It's also possible that the one interested in committed love doesn't respect their own boundaries and let themselves being stringed along.
As to what's going for you, I see you embracing clarity and the desire to cut through bullshit at this point. A part of you wants to reach the truth of this situation and is willing to think about it deeply. Get your sense of agency back by either communicating your needs and fears or by taking the time by yourself to work on that. It's clarified by the 8 of Wands so I see quick communication, heated arguments perhaps but it's for the best because you need to get to the core of the issue.
For what's going against you, I see you clinging onto the good aspects of this relationship, as in, it's not perfect but there's enough pleasurable aspects to it that you don't want to let go of that. You're protective of what you have and I also see you being a bit too carefree by pretending the negative aspects of this situation don't affect you that much, that everything is find and good, even though it isn't. You might be a bit of a hopeless romantic and you just don't want to see that this situation is not bringing you the true happiness that you seek but rather putting you in a unstable and potentially threatening situation. I don't know how to put it but with this + the Devil as significator for this relationship I get toxic vibes from this, but that you're too addicted to it to really snap out of it.
What you need to take in is shown by the 10 of Cups, and I think here it means that you need to find hope again that you're deserving of true and untainted happiness in matters of love. This card is about commitment and romantic, even familial fulfillment, and I think it's important to remember that if that's what you want then you can't settle for less because then you'll never get what your heart truly desires. This card is here to remind you of your dream, stop settling for less and suffocating your true wish.
You need to release your hope that the situation will solve itself without making a choice. I get the idea that you keep imagining how things could be, or would be if X or Y happened, but you're not taking the necessary step towards your wish.
All of this is highlighted by the general energy of the reading, which is all about going back to decision making after a time of hesitation. It's going to be your role to know which decision you need to make and how though, but you need to leave the harbor at some point.
For the outcome of this situation, I see you moving on to better days, letting go of this situation that doesn't fulfill you and going through a very social phase where you're going to either form new connections, or get back in touch with friends and celebrate your newfound freedom. It seems this decision of moving on will bring you a lot more happiness than sorrow. Yes it is painful to let go, but you have much to gain, and seeking different social interactions will help you feel better and get back on track. Perhaps it would help to find the humor in the situation and have fun gossiping about this relationship with your friends in order to vent and get another perspective.
PILE 3
Cards: Wheel of Fortune, the Fool, 3 of Cups, 9 of Cups, Ace of Swords rx, 9 of Pentacles, 6 of Pentacles, Temperance, 10 of Swords, the High Priestess, 9 of Swords
First off, let's look at your current love life.
For this pile, I don't think there is anyone specific in the picture for you. I see two possible situations depending on the people. Some of you might have experienced a breakup and are now in your new chapter, having left behind that situation and being past that; for others, I see you waiting for a relationship to show up eventually like some big turn of events. In both cases, you have a very open and carefree attitude right now, enjoying the moment and I get the idea that you might be enjoying casual sex as well, for some of you at least. In any case, you are currently not bound to anyone.
For what's going for you, I see you being social, meeting new people or enjoying time with friends. You're just enjoying yourself and your freedom and it's what you feel called to do right now. It seems you really needed to go through that phase in order to feel happier with yourself and find your balance again.
For what's going against you, I see the idea of casual, or at least, superficial connections showing up once more. You might also not be super ready to get into a committed relationship at the moment because you still feel the need to enjoy your freedom and have either multiple partners, or you just want to enjoy your social life without having to compromise or divide the limited time you have in your hands for one person only. I also see that you lack clarity on what you want. Is a committed relationship really what you want, or do you want to keep what you have right now? And if a relationship is what you want, what would it look like? I think you need to take some time reflecting on what romantic happiness looks like to you to see if it aligns with what you're doing.
For what you need to welcome in, there is a message here of reminding yourself that love is not just about sex and intensity, but also about sweetness and complicity. Looking up to your partner because you find them incredible, because they make you feel like a giggly child you can be your true self with. I also see the need to value true and deep emotional connection. There is a need to be the guardian of your fulfillment, not in a warroir-like way, but rather, in a nurturing way. Be the gardener that takes care of their blooming plants with love and care, and by that I mean that you need to put in the energy of what you want to harvest in the future, not just what's easily available in the moment. You also need to be more independent and advocate for your needs.
It's is very important to make way before you can receive anything new. Which means that you need to get clear on what it is that you truly want and release what doesn't align with that. Perhaps you're also quite detached and would benefit from getting in touch with your deeper emotions again. I think you've somewhat been hiding your heavier emotions inside and ignoring them for a while now and that might be what needs to be released.
For outcome, I think there is a deep need for realizing the options you have to choose from regarding your love life, and really take a look at what you truly want. I think this very social phase will come to an end for now, that you will be more focused on yourself and your inner world. This may trigger intense negative feelings that you were ignoring up until now because you were distracting yourself from them. You may need to hit the bottom before you can rise again, but fear not because from there, the only way to go is up. Learn to look for answers within, I think this time has the opportunity to teach you a lot about yourself and help your grow as a person and to gain clarity on your life.
I also wanted to note that there is a striking lack of Wands in this reading, which to me indicates that the main point of work in your situation is not so much taking actions, but processing thoughts and emotions to get clear on what you want and how to get there. A time for self reflection and growth is coming up.
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HEAVENLY DRINKS
CHAPTER 2
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PAIRINGS: Alastor x F!Reader
SUMMARY: In this chapter, the protagonist finds themselves in a confrontation with Alastor, known as the Radio Demon. Vox, another character, intervenes, leading to a tense exchange. Later, the protagonist returns home, reflecting on their fame and current situation. Alastor is just annoying.
WARNINGS: MINORS DNI. Mature Content, Sensitivity, Alcohol use, like HEAVY, (It was noted in the intro that reader is an alcoholic but gets better throughout the story), Verbal Altercations, Implied Violence, Character Behavior, Sexual References, News Media, Emotional Turmoil, Cliffhanger.
NOTICE: please don't steal/copy/translate my work. But thanks for liking it, though!! ^^ Posting chapter every friday but this one is early! Asks are always open, but i can’t get to all of them at the same exact time so if yours is answered right away…You might be lucky 🙏
WORDS: 2.9k
HEAVENLY DRINKS MASTERLIST
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The waitress squeaked out of fear and ran to Lucifer knows where, clearing the space of view between you two.
‘Fuckin’ wimp.” You thought.
“No manners these days, am i wrong?” The deer said, turning his head to face yours.
You snapped out of your trance, “Uh…I was doing just fine my myself.”
“I could tell.” he smirked, “You must be pretty desperate to drink every single type of liquor in here.”
You raised an eyebrow, “What do you mean?”
“Well,” he replied, “For starters, you were naming those liquors from the top of your head like the songs in your albums..”
You only blinked.
“Secondly, you’re dressed like a prostitute. Thirdly, you’re not even wearing a bra,” He cleared his throat, “Fo-”
“What gives you the fuckin’ right to call me out like that?!” You argue, “Do you know who I am, fuckin’ asshat?!”
Alastor’s demeanor shifted more eerie, along with the lights in the establishment, “Do you know who I am?” He retorted, “I think somebody needs a quick lesson since they’ve missed some classes, shall we?” He asked, sizing up his form.
You snarled, “You cocky…”
“What the fuck is going on here?!” A loud voice yelled from the entrance.
Both of your heads turned to meet a vision on Vox standing at the entrance, clearly fuming.
“…Why the fuck-“ He points his claw to you, “are you doing he-“ He then snaps his like of view to Alastor, “I-what the fuck?!”
You started to laugh like a child, only now you were a drunk-full-grown-not-mentally-stable-and-not-currently-alive-adult.
Until Alastor slapped you on the back of your head to stop.
“My office, now!”
***
Vox’s office was dimly lit, with soft jazz music playing in the background. The walls were adorned with paintings of various musicians, and shelves lined with books and trophies. A large desk dominated the room, with a sleek computer monitor and stacks of papers piled high on its surface.
Alastor sat across from Vox, observing the scene before him. He seemed to find this situation amusing for some reason.
But you certainly didn’t.
This was not how you wanted your first day out to go.
“What do you want from me?” Alastor asked, his tone casual. “I’m already banned from this fine establishment, am i not?” He chortled.
“That’s the fuckin’ problem,” He slammed his fist on the desk, “I don’t even know why i bothered to bring you in here.” He growled.
Vox then shifted his eyes to you, “-and you.” he added, “You shouldn’t even be showing your face here. do you know how mad i am at you?!” He yelled in your face sparks igniting in his antennas.
“…What.” You gave him a droopy smile.
He groaned, “How much drinks did she have, fuckin’ hell-“
“-34, my good sir.” Alastor intervened.
You chuckled, “No, i had like, 4 shots.”
“Well, you must be mistaken, because i counted 34 drinks.” Alastor corrected, bending his neck slightly.
“Wh-hold on, why were you watch-“
“Enough! That is not what we are talking about.” Vox yelled, standing up from his seat to show authority.
After a surprising moment of silence, he continued, “Y/N, You literally vanished from sight a day before we had a massive show planned at my convention center,” Vox answered, sitting back down, “I know you weren’t told that you aren’t welcome here, but you aren’t and it should be obvious.”
You stayed silent for a moment, getting sober by the second. How long ago was that?
“…Sorry.” You crossed your arms.
“Now you see how none of you are allowed here?” He folded his hands on his desk, looking down and sighing in stress.
“…Yeah, yeah.” You said.
***
Walking out of the building, you jumped slightly when you felt a claw on your shoulder.
“You really don’t remember who I am, little lady?” Alastor said, turning your shoulders to face him.
You looked up slowly, relaxing the alcohol in your body, “No, i know you. Just thought it was funny.” You put a hand on your hip. “You used to put my songs in your broadcast in intermissions, if i remember correctly”
He laughed, “My highest point of listeners.” He grinned.
“I don’t remember much, though,” You admitted, scratching your cheek. “Kinda what i was wanting las’ couple of years.”
“I’d imagine.” He replied, “Drinking every night for forty years isn’t healthy, even for someone like you.” He scoffed, still
plastering the same grin on his face.
“wh- ‘someone like me?’” You questioned.
He sighed, “Look, i know you haven’t been seen for a while, but that doesn’t mean that we forgot about you, if that’s what you’ve been wanting.” He clarified, “You’re a well known woman, but you’ve had…issues since you were alive.”
“good way to bring down the mood,” You scoffed, “i thought we were just getting along, y’know?”
He laughed, “That would be a headline, for sure.”
You tilted your head in confusion, “You’re weird.”
“You’re drunk.” He claimed back.
You growled, about to bite back, but he cut you off, “It seems our time here is up,” He said, now looking at his watch (that clearly does not exist) on his wrist, “My radio show starts in little over ten minutes. Ta-Ta!” He waved goodbye, walking past you.
You began to walk over to him, to give some piece of mind to him, but he then materialized into the shadow.
“Piece of trash…” You muttered, beginning to walk away from the building.
***
As you unlocked the door to your manor, you can’t help but wonder why, after all these years, people still remembered you?
You stepped inside, kicking your heels off.
That was the whole point in rotting in this trash bin, anyways. You couldn’t have all this fame, it wasn’t ethical.
You tossed your fur coat into the laundry room.
And on top of that, you were banned from one of your favorite places. who the fuck does that? He’s just jealous-
You plopped your body onto the plush couch, not bothering about the feeling of your dress riding up your thighs, as you would’ve.
“-yeah, jealous,” You said aloud, “He’s a fucking television, I’m full bodied. I’m a legend and he’s just a piece of trash.”
you scavenged around the coffe table’s under-cabinets until you found a half empty bottle of wine-
…and let’s not forget that stupid deer.
“After all the fucking fame i probably got him, he just treats me like imp-shit. I was just tryna be friendly, start a little fake fight, but noooo-“
You took a large swig of your bottle.
“He just had to get me in trouble, embarrass me, and walk away as if nothing fucking happened.”
You sighed.
You looked at the bottle that was now empty.
…And think if… you did this to yourself?
“…Nah.”
You take off your jewelry, take off your clothes until you were in a bra and panties, and sprawl yourself on your couch, reaching for the remote and turning on your television.
“He’s probably getting… bullied on the news or somethin’.” You muttered to yourself, laughing softly.
Swapping through news networks-
…Oh fuck.
“Famous singer and dancer star from back in the day, Y/N (or stage name idk), Has returned to the bustling streets of the pentagram after 40 fucking years of an absence!” Katie said clenching her script sheet in hand with a shit-eating smile on her face.
You always felt bad for that other guy next to her…
-That’s not the point.
“…apparently, she got into a little fight with the infamous Radio Demon we all know and hate, Alastor! Talk about the conversation of a 40 years!” She added as a laughing track played.
You cringed, “Fuckin’ bitch.”
“But that’s not all! Apparently, this has caused quite the uproar among the fans of the two. Some are worried that our beloved star may never return to performing again, and is just scavenging for some drinks and dicks! While others are ecstatic that she has finally reappeared after such a long time.”
“…Fucking hell, m’ not dealing with this.”
“In other news-”
You turned off the tv, tossing your remote onto the floor.
“Her boobs are so fuckin’ fake, I hate that bitch.” You ranted, Stretching your back and staring at the ceiling.
“…Let’s see, ok…I’m out of books to read.” You noted, “…No more alcohol in this stupid jail cell of a shit hole…” You noted as well, “…and I’m all over the news now…”
After a moment of contemplating life, you sit up again and go to your room.
“I should go to another bar…a really expensive one…” You muttered, immediately rummaging through your closet.
“…I have a lot of money anyways…” You grinned, “Probably more than that stupid dear. I could probably hunt him and eat him…it would taste…” You looked down to your naked body for a moment, thinking, “…like…if it were medium rare, really good…”
“-What was that?” a static voice asked from across the walk-in closet.
“What the fuck?!-“ You turned around, covering your boobs, “How the fuck did you get into my house, pervert?!”
“I’m sorry, dear. But I’m afraid I don’t understand what you’re saying.” Alastor said, crossing his arms, “And for the record, I’m far from a pervert.” He said, squinting his eyes.
“How the fuck did you get in here?!” You demanded.
“Well, you see-“
“No, no. No explanations. Get the fuck out of my house, perverted demon!” You yelled, throwing a shoe at him.
He caught it without effort and stared at you with his red eyes, “Excuse me? You…just asked me why I was-“
You narrowed your eyes, “Oh my gosh, you are so annoying, i can do see how Vox hates you now…” You groan, looking for a robe.
“…You know,” he began as you continued to search, “There’s a saying that goes along the lines of, ‘Drunk men say wise words’ I believe?” He questioned aloud to himself, “…I don’t think that goes for women.”
As you tied a robe around your waist you put your hands on your hips and looked at him. “What are you doing here.” You asked.
“…” Alastor waited silently.
“…Like…actually.” You clarified.
Alastor nodded, “I came to make sure you were alright.” He said simply, “You were rather intoxicated earlier today.”
“…”
“…And you were also not wearing anything under the dress, it kept slipping off.” He added, adding an awkward laugh to it.
“…”
“…So, naturally, I was concerned for your safety.” He finished.
“…”
“…Was it something I said?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.
“…”
“…Or maybe it was the fact that you threw your shoes at me.” He stated bluntly.
“…Wait- why would it be about the shoes?”
Alastor smiled, “Never mind, it sounds much nicer in here when it’s down one voice.”
You scoffed, “What the fuck is your problem? didn’t you come over here to check in on me?”
“Yes, that is correct.”
You rolled your eyes, “Then why are you acting like an ass all the sudden.”
“Actually…” He pondered for a moment, “…I was hoping you would… join me for dinner.” He replied casually.
You raised a brow, “Dinner?”, You said flatly, crossing your arms.
“Yes,” Alastor confirmed. “I’ve…prepared a special meal for us to enjoy together.”
“…That’s so mean.”
“…What…what do you mean?-“
“You’re just tryna get me to not go to a fuckin’ bar.”
He laughed blandly, “You are very wise, my lady.” He claimed, “But, may i remind you that a free dinner cost less than putting another 34 drinks onto your tab?”
You looked at him confused, but then realized something that disgusted you, “Are you gonna feed me cannibal food?”
He laughed, “For you, I’m sure it’s your favorite meal, but for me, yes, it is a cannibal meal.”
“…What-“
“Medium rare deer?”
You gasped, “Stalker! I fuckin’ knew it!” You claimed, getting another shoe from the ground and getting ready to throw it.
“Don’t!-“ He grabbed the shoe from your drunken-soft grip, “-you dare.”
“…Just don’t go to the bar,” He sighed as if taking care of a toddler, “I’m doing you a favor.”
“-And why would the Radio Demon care?”
“…It’s not pity,” he began, “…I just get second hand embarrassment seeing you drunk.” He grimaced.
“Nah, you just want me and not want anybody else to check me out.” You grinned, turning around to rummage through clothes again.
“Excuse me?” He said, offended, “I don’t view you that way whatsoever.”
“It’s okay, I worked hard for my glutes.” You slugged out a laugh, “Plastic balls wouldn’t look good in my skin.”
Alastor let his disgust cease for a moment before sighing, “I’m leaving. But,” He pulled out a pen from out of nowhere and wrote something down on a piece of paper, that also appeared out of nowhere, and handed it to you when done. “-If you ever need anything. You know, since you’re so vulnerable outside right now, I’ll be at this location.”
‘Hazbin Hotel, Morningstar District.’ It read.
“I’m not vulnerable, I’m just really hot and everybody wants me.”
“…Ugh, okay,” Alastor said to himself, “I’m out. Goodbye, Y/N. Until we meet again.”
And he was gone with the shadows.
You sighed, “Probably still watching me.”, you said aloud, pulling out a black silk dress from the mountainous pile on clothes beneath you.
***
You awoke in the morning to a pounding headache.
You groaned, rubbing your temples as you sat up and opened your eyes.
Your gaze fell upon the empty bottles of liquor strewn across the room and a wave of regret washed over you.
“…At least I decided to buy more.” You said to yourself, sitting up as you yawned and stretched.
Your eyes drifted towards the nightstand next to the bed and saw a glass of water and some painkillers.
You smiled softly, thankful for the kind gesture your past self gave you.
You popped the pills in your mouth and drank the entire glass, feeling slightly better after the medicine kicked in.
You looked at the clock on your wall, seeing that it was only 7 am.
Sighing, you get out of bed, ignoring the fact that your entire outfit from last night was still on (including the heels), You stalked your way over the kitchen to make some hangover stew
After a few minutes of chopping, mixing, and boiling, you finally had a bowl of hangover soup in front of you.
You took a bite and moaned.
It tasted delicious, as usual from your cooking.
And decided to turn the TV on.
Which was a bad idea.
Many news channels reporting on the Pride Ring were showing pictures of you and Alastor at the bar and outside the building-
“Could this be the relationship of the century or a big fluke?” The news reporter asked the audience-
Switch.
“-Another soul for Alastor to collect? Find out more after-“
Switch.
“-Personally, I wouldn’t date her if i was him, yeah?” The television guest claimed to the news reporter now on screen.
…what?
“I mean, look at her. Her boobs are flat and her ass looks fake. I mean, she could’ve at least had some surgery happen in those 40 years or bought some pads for bras.” He added, making the reporter laugh-
Click. Off.
You slammed the remote down and groaned.
You had just gotten out of a 40-year-long-hangover and now the world wants to talk shit about your body?
And you?
Great.
This was a great start to the day.
You got up, grabbing a bottle of wine from the table and taking a swig, feeling the burning sensation in your throat and the dizziness in your brain.
“…What am i doing to myself.” You said, looking at the bottle.
“…I should go to town and find a fuckin’ news reporter,” You claimed, placing the wine on the coffee table, “Fuckin’ rumors spreadin’ like that guy’s ass…” You trotted to your room to find an outfit.
You stopped, looking at your outfit from last Night, “…or jus’ fix my makeup.”
***
Strutting into the heart of Pentagram City, this was probably your first time appreciating how much eyes were on you and those…’phones.’ (which you found out the name from the television.)
You walked with confidence, but also with a little bit of embarrassment.
But mostly confidence.
You looked around, taking in the sights of the bustling city and the sounds of people chatting and laughing and yelling.
Alastor submerged from the shadows next to you, walking by your side.
“Enjoying the outside, my fellow homebody?” He asked with a grin.
“Not now, Alastor.” You said, scanning the area.
“Now, What’s gotten you so worked up with smarts?” He asked like a babysitter, “Haven’t seen you this focused since…never!” He laughed.
You scoffed, “Some guy dared to insult me on live television.” You answered, “Called me flat on my Himalaya’s.”
“…Your what’s?” He asked.
“My boobs, Alastor… they’re not that flat are they?”
I’m not answering that question.” He announced.
You pouted.
“Think of the headlines, dear.”
“…Yeah, you’re right.” You shrugged.
“So,” Alastor started, “Anything i could do to help?” He asked, clenching his cane in curiosity.
“…I needa find a popular News station. So i can announce my…opinions n’ stuff.” You said, “a popular one around these parts.”
Alastor thinked for a moment, “…Ever suggested to yourself…Vox 2 Nite?”
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NOTES: CHAPTER TWO IS OUT AND EARLY?! Guys the Alastor x Reader tumblr community is dead rn I need people to like RISE FROM THE DEAD and get their friends who also thrive here like…do their job??? Show support??? Requests??? NOTES??? COMMENTS??? ahem, Anyways, I’m proud of this chapter, It’s gonna get better though, there is spicy material coming, but you guys just have to be patient <3, support is appreciated, Love you guys!!!
-Genderlessdude92, Kiki!
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