#Things were always better in the past

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Bonus 7: Time moves sideways

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #better drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #Despite a whole ass inspiration board for reference - it turns out drawing and colouring half submerged people is a CHALLENGE. #I am channeling the zoobie bunny and internally screaming “WHY DID YOU THINK THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA”. #What I wanted was a cool transition between present and past! What I got was a very full mouth of my own foot! #That said: there are aspects I really like about this one and I feel like I got most of the way to where I wanted it to be. #Water is hard to draw and I am saying that even after dedicating a full 4 page comic with people in the water. #Forget hands. Water is my new nemesis. #I love how floaty this flashback transition was. The hazy mind wandering as LWJ carries him as a set up to recollection! #Aren't memories an incredible thing? To relive a moment in your mind? To have time repeat again and again? #And yet it is always a little different when we go to recall it once again. We are different people than the person we once were.

[ittybittybumblebee]

FOR THE LOVE OF BEING CREATIVE PLEASE KEEP DRAWING THOSE DRAWINGS YOU THINK ARE SHITTY, THEY MATTER MORE THAN YOU COULD EVER KNOW JUST BY BEING, JUST BY YOU EXPRESSING YOURSELF, JUST BY YOU WANTING TO MAKE IT AT ALL, LETS HOPE THE FUTURE YOU HAS LEARNED TO NOT CRINGE AT THE TIMES YOU WERE LEARNING AND HAVING FUN AND MESSING UP AND STILL KEPT GOING BECAUSE YOU WERE ENJOYING CREATING SOMETHING DAMMIT

#hi i am emotional about art #i am emotional about artists that belittle their past selves drawings for not being good enoughh then #littlehint from Me: they were always good enough there is no good enough it exists because you loved whatever you were doing enoug to do it #standards are fake in art just make something i promise it matters what you make matters #i wish i could say things better but im very tired sleepy #you get what i mean #hi artists. please keep drawing if it brings you joy. please learn to not sacrifice joy for perfectionism. i love you all

[alsojnpie]

hey. um. i love him

#O_O i really love him #it's getting warmer every day and i can't draw him in a sweater for much longer #by the way. is this site going to. yknow. die #sigh........i kept telling myself I'd get better at it one day #kind of like the way i tell myself i can get together courage to speak up but i never do #using another website just sounds so depressing #im not good at social media. im tired of pretending like i can get good at it #but you can't even pretend like you can jump into a conversation if no one is having a conversation #i wanted to be part of a community here but i never could figure out what belonging looked like or how i could do it #and maybe it's my fundamental misunderstanding of that that prevents it but how can i understand it without experience #I'm so jealous of everyone who looks like they achieved what i couldn't even put my finger on. but since i didn't even understand it #i can't even be sure what exactly im jealous of #the other day i walked past a trio of friends and they had their arms around each other and were laughing as they walked #and i felt really strongly that even though I've always wanted a friend like that I'm actually fundamentally incompatible with that. #there's several reasons #but it made me feel really sad. but it made me feel a little better too. i guess it's really not my fault. maybe. i don't really know #in that moment it felt very much like something that was not my fault. and it was nice and sad at the same time #idk what's going to happen here. but one thing i know for sure is that i can have a happy tomorrow. no matter what #no matter what i have to give up on. i can find joy in other things. even in myself #and if there's one idea that he is about. it's that one

[tomatoart]

Hi sorry if this is weird to say but i saw some of your Persona 5 art on Pinterest and i wanted to check you out bc i really really liked ur style and HOLY MOLY YOU HAVE IMPROVED. Ofc i know that it's old art and time passes and new things will look different n shit but!!! Dude!!! Your art looks fantastic!!!

NOT WEIRD AT ALLLLL HELP THIS IS SO FUNNY I LOVE U. Genuinely one of the best reactions gotten outta me like I can’t imagine going from seeing the older art to the new that fast you just like speed ran my own life LOL but srsly tysm!!! It always makes me smile so wide seeing ppl come from my persona art bcuz it is and was such an important part of my art & life yknow !!! I hope to draw more of it again!!! honorary verterans badge for liking my older stuff (blows my mind to think it’s still enjoyable dhakgswh) even if u weren’t here for when I was originally posting it cuz only real ones loved that stuff way back . This has done NUMBERZ for my brain btw

For anyone curious this is from an old comparison I did on my main last yr. HUHHH ⁉️⬇️

#TY AGAIN 🐢 #asks #not tomaart #I always struggle w insane thoughts like ‘I haven’t progressed at all *bashing head*’ and then wonderful little doves carrying a lovely #mssg from above (asks like these) and I realize #that time DOES pass and new things look better <3 hurrah #WAIT SORRY TAG RANT BC OLD ART REMINED ME #have i ever told u guys abt when I was rlly big in the persona fanbase here that ppl would comic dub my art all the time w/o showing me and #then I stumbled on one and the comments were like WHY DO THEY ALL LOOK LIKE GIRAFFES XD and the op was like IDK XD and that changed me 5eva #started drawing necks short n big to leave my tortured past (bullied on utube) behind *eagel caw* #like in this u cant rlly see the giraffe necks but I promis u. it was scary . #I think the true scare tho was when I didn’t draw noses for a time.... WHEN I LOVE DRAWING THEM⁉️ *hides under the bed* so scary

[avisisisis]

To add a little more to that post about how peaches represent SWK and Mac's relationship:

In the mountain, Macaque is the one to crush the peach in his hand. He offered it to Sun Wukong, and when he didn't accept it and instead yelled at him, he destroyed it and threw it on the ground

In the end, it was Macaque who left first, not the other way around. Now, their broken relationship isn't completely his fault, but he did play a part on it

SWK screamed at him when he tried to mend their friendship, so instead of trying again, he left. That's what broke their relationship for good. Not Sun Wukong yelling, not Liu'er Mihou not looking for him, but Macaque leaving and (as far as we know) not coming back. La gota que colmó el vaso, we could say. Stuff had already been going on between those two. SWK never seemed to genuinely listen to Macaque and his promises of staying forever were empty (he never would've been able to stay in one place for so long) and Macaque never even bothered to communicate his negative feelings over this, so when he warned him he was ignored

Sun Wukong left again and again and again, looking for more power to "be strong enough to protect them", and eventually he lost sight of why he was doing it. But no matter how many times he left, he came back. Macaque didn't

#they both did what they wanted from the other #swk wanted mac to be able to leave when he wanted on the condition that he'd always come back #mac wanted swk to stay w him and be loyal to him the same way he was to swk forever #swk promised they'd stay there forever but even if he had tried he would've eventually broken that promise #the one time macaque left swk on his own he never returned #they both hurt each other so much #it wasn't a one-sided thing like so many ppl believe #“oh but swk left and killed macaque! he's a selfish shit!” “but macaque abandoned swk n hes technically the one at fault for everything!” #shut up #i'm not gonna say neither of them were at fault. cuz they both were #but it wasn't one-sided #now the difference between them is how they act about it. swk is trying to be a better person and to not repeat his past mistakes #macaque gets angry and torments mk (who is a child especially compared to him) for being close to swk #and tries to convince him that swk is a terrible mentor when in reality he's never hurt mk (yet. and even then it wasn't intentional) #most of mk's problems w swk come not only from the fact that swk sucks at communication but also from teh fact that everyone's+ #talking shit abt him. they're saying swk sucks n make mk doubt him n himself when swk rlly is just trying his best #anyways i'll get more into that later #lmk #lego monkie kid #sun wukong #the six eared macaque #liu'er mihou #swk #the monkey king #shadowpeach #lmk season 4 #peaches #avis talks #avis' post

[puthyflapps]

Swifties prove everyday that they’re the dumbest people on the internet and that’s really saying something cuz I’ve dealt directly with blarkes

#1) swifites always being racist toward Beyoncé #2) swifities doxxing a Palestinian girl and sending her info to the IDF cuz she said that there were better options for Time’s PotY #3) swifites beefing with North West – a literal child – cuz they thot she “shaded” Taylor #4) swifites commenting snake emojis on Kim K’s insta posts thinking they’re doing something other than driving up her engagement and lining #her pockets #t swift #also these are all just annoying things I’ve seen happen TODAY #I cannot wait until we are released from whatever govt psyop we’ve been under for the past few years cuz I’m over this endless string of #swift propaganda 🔫🔫🔫 it’s literally insane and no matter how many times I block people or hit not interested in posts I am still forced to #see shit about her like it is never ending and it’s so fucking exhausting like the way white women in particular make being a swifite their #whole personality is so embarrassing!!! THIS EOMAN CANNOT SING YALL!! AND IM TIRED OF BEING NICE AND SAYING SHE HAS DEVENT SONG WRITING #SKILLS CUZ SHE DOESNT!! EVERYTHING ABOUT HER IS MEDIOCRE AT BEST!!! SHE CANNOY SING AND HER LYRICS ARE THE MUSICAL EQUIVALENT OF WATTPAD FF! #I am so tired of this bullshit and I used to be able to find reprieve in football but no more!! cuz her and her annoying cult have #infiltrated that too like this shit is annoying and I feel like I’m going crazy cuz she’s everywhere and not in an organic way. In a very #strategic marketing capitalistic way and I love The Wilds but I hate how the fandom has like woven TS into everything there too like #I think I’m gonna commit a crime. I think imma toss someone through a brick wall cuz I’m losing it

[gobstoppr]

and btw im in my hater arc rn. as time goes on the more i find a lot of 'fandom' stuff insufferable (i like art n stuff. just the way that fandom refits every media to fit a single mold and set of boring archetypes is exhausting.)

i just get really easily annoyed lately. and have been unfollowing people on a whim a lot. its not personal i promise

#fandom culture has made me actively dislike shit i was fixated on a year ago. looking at your ninja turtles #its not even like what they were doing were particularly offensive it was just exhaustingly boring #im sorry i just really dont care about ur 2 million fics about leo being a sadboy. or one million seperated aus. #theres definetly a part of the whole situation in general which has been me coming to terms with my own internalized misogny #actively re-examining my tendencys to gravity towards male characters #idk maybe its making me dislike art more. but idk. ive always analyzed why i react certain ways to certain things. this isnt new for me #anywaays. i had been following a bunch of ninja turtle blogs and they sorta kept messing around with shows like ninjago too #and at some point i was just like. i dont know if these shows are actually that good guys. i think youjust like shows for little boys #and fandoms tend to shaft female chars so it sure helps that their casts are 98% male . #maybe theyre not your blorbo maybe theyre just Guy McAverageMan. thats not inherently bad but you have to consider it. #guys rottmnt is isnt even that good . its not that good ok. its alright/pretty good. and the movie does a few neat things #i feel like ive become one of those people that turn 18 and then immediately go 'minors dni'. im not there yet but i just. #we're watching kids shows. its ok . you can say it. #you may have noticed ive been reblogging a lot of dungeon meshi stuff. i read it all over the past week. #but here's the thing. i thought it was mid/good for like 70% of it. #i think its got some really really cool worldbuilding ideas and stuff #but i think a lot of the writing was sorta. uninteresting to me. #my discord friends have been raving over izutsumi for months. #but i found her presence in the story to be weird and underdeveloped. she felt out of place and her introduction felt clumsy #i felt when the story was ramping up the manga got a lot better. because again theres some rlly cool ideas at play #all the shit with the lion? incredible. the way all the infighting led to more problems bc the elves refuse to explain anything? rlly good. #marcille landing in power? reallly good shit. (i still thought it was a lil undercooked still tho) #i cant stop thinking about laios in that climax scene. i think he shouldve been feral a lot more often #uhh. i got distracted. fandom bad and annoying. #saw a post talking about marcille realizing izutsumi is only 17 and then describing how 'omg shes a mom now' and i wanted to throw up #im done. i swear. im done talking for real. aagh #text

[nebulouscoffee]

Me, attending the latest in a ridiculous number of funerals this year in the place of a childhood friend who couldn't be there, watching the lifeless body of an old lady who used to make me snacks in the kitchen when I was a kid be carted away forever while my friend's mother cries and tells me she's grateful I could be there because it felt like having the support of her own daughter, hugging her and talking reassuringly and not processing a single one of these emotions: ... I am going to write soooo much fanfiction about this

#''this'' being collective grief. because tbvh it's the main reason I haven't written very much this year (but will slowly start to) #I write to remind myself I am lucky. I keep telling myself this but even now when I feel awful I am so lucky #I am lucky that none of these funerals have involved very close family members or friends of mine #and I am lucky to be living in conditions with the space to write and space to grieve #and space to come together to mourn with dignity while people not that far away from me are not receiving the same privilege rn #I am lucky my dad was with me today and I spent the evening chatting with him on the terrace I am lucky he is alive I am lucky I am lucky #(apologies if this sounds like a robot malfunctioning lmao writing is just how I process things) #(and apparently I just don't seem to feel like I have the right to feel bad about any of this anywhere except my st@r trek blog hehe) #anyway. To stay on theme I shall say something about Trills :D #I imagine loss and grief must register very differently to them. very Non Linearly in the literal sense but also a highly abstract one #even I feel this massive sense of time warp between all these funerals; and this chest-crushing distance between me and my friends #how do Trills even exist #how do they wake up every day remembering all those friends and children and parents who loved them and they loved and are gone now #and still function #how does Ezri feel walking around with memories of parents that aren't hers (but were soooo much better than hers) taking care of her #does she feel comforted by them? does it feel like the people in those memories were always comforting HER specifically? #does it even matter who it belonged to originally if a memory is HERS now? #does Ezri mourn for any parents of past hosts more than she knows she will mourn for her own mother one day? #does having all this lived experience bring her reassuring amounts of perspective for a 20-something or just overwhelm her all the more? #idk; but I hope she learns to take comfort in her past hosts' memories of family eventually... #(...again. I am going to write sooooo much fan fiction about this lmao) #cw death

[skrunksthatwunk]

went back to the sketchbooks around when i was going through yyh for the first time in 2019 and found a pile of near-yearly sticky note updates about my relationship with the series next to my first yyh doodles, a page full of kuwabaras. thought it'd be fun to share

+ more thoughts and old yyh art below

(it's crazy i didn't find any kurama-centric pages for months bc i think he's the one i doodled in the margins of class notes and stuff the most. his hair's pwetty and he gives me the least trouble outta any of the main 4)

something i noticed while skimming the two sketchbooks i took these from was how mean i was to myself at the time about my art. i guess it hit me more because i don't really spend hours going through my old sketchbooks over and over to track my progress and growth like i used to quite often. i guess it was only a little after when my self esteem was lowest (8th grade, tale as old as time), but... idk. i knew back then that i'd grown a lot in the few years since i started drawing more seriously (that's why i looked through my art so much), but like... i guess that never translated into being nice to myself about it. i ended up going back through about ten more sketchbooks to find more yyh art, and in the coming years i'm glad to say that negativity in the margins went away. hell yeah

but even so, my love for yyh was a constant and effusive thing, as it is now. it's probably the oldest of my current media interests. i watched myself get into rgg and develop my ocs and watched others fade in and out, watched my style loop back on itself and go all over the place, passed by pages of writing about crushes and album releases and gender discoveries and my grandparents dying, all surrounded by little drawings of the characters i love. including kuwabara in a maid dress right next to my dead grandma grief rambling that one time (no i'm not kidding. my grandma died in like late 2020 and the page where i poured my heart out after finding out she was gone just trying to process everything had one with catboy maid dress kuwabara directly opposite it, who i'd drawn like the evening before she died in her sleep. he killed my grandma from like 100 miles away he was that powerful. that wasn't even the last time i drew him like that and i don't even care about catboys or maid dresses much. i think it was just a bigger meme and he was the guy i most associated with cats. i put that man in a situation and he fucking got her because the book couldn't contain him. some victor frankenstein shit. anyway)

i took about 150 pictures, most with multiple sketches. i decided not to add any more though bc 1) i posted some of them on old accounts but i don't remember which ones, and tbh i value my anonymity a little too much 2) All Of The Pictures Turned Out Bad in ways i don't feel like getting into but just trust me it's like 6 layers of fucked up illegible image bullshit 3) i found it hard to narrow it down to things i felt were indicative of the development or interesting or anything like that. idk. i figured it was an interesting exercise for me and it probably wouldn't really mean anything to anyone else. and that's ok :) it was nice anyway. i mostly mention it to be like Oh My God i've drawn these guys a lot and i STILL don't know what i'm doing... :| it's fun

however i did transcribe the notes i left:

7/9/19: yo it's been less than a week & i'm on ep. 80 wtf i love this show

8/14/20: 1/2way thru my 3rd watch (first dub, first [with older sibling]) & honestly still love it & kuwabara being the first one i drew makes me happy

7/28/21: i'm watching it w/ [younger sibling] now! 4th(ish) watch, 2nd time through the dub, which is so much better than the sub really elevates the text. we're at the semifinals of the DT, which means this is technically my 5th time through yyh up until that point but eh semantics anyway i still love & obsess over yyh! <3

1/14/24 (present day): hey, i'm rewatching yyh for the.. idk 5th or 6th time. still love it & never stopped. now i'm writing fic & drawing & posting about it. i have friends i talk to about it. [both siblings] have seen it. so much has changed, and so little, but it made me sad seeing how much i insulted my own art. i love you 2019 me. god knows you needed it

[+ this drawing]:

anyway. forever fornever. if you even care

#that's all. just kind of a personal post i thought was neat. skrunklore #skrunkart #yyh #yu yu hakusho #you can really feel the 14 y/o in a lot of the little notes and stuff but that too is part of the growth and change im trying to celebrate. #ripping my fingernails off about it but it needs to be done #also the hearts are because they love each other. and also me in like a cheering you on kinda way #ok more lore but around jr year i started feeling like my art was getting worse or at least stagnating and i kind of wished i could go back #to the era where a lot of that art is from bc there were little things i was better at and also bc i was much more prolific and adventurous #and while i'm sympathetic to it looking back after another couple of years it's like nah. no i was still growing i was just too close to se #like i'll be like oughh i haven't grown at all in years >:(( and then i'll look at the art i made over the course of 2023 and go oh nvm lol #some of it was more 'getting back into the swing of things' + traditional and tech issues being resolved but there was also growth #there is also stuff to be proud of and there always is and there always will be. that goes for you too reader #no matter what your art does or does not look like. i guess that's part of why im posting this too #part of what got me into visual art was seeing how people's art changed (sketchbook tours). it's cool and seeing that learning process so #well preserved and so easily analyzed kinda activated something in my brain. i think it got me past a lot of the 'im just not talented' #stuff a lotta ppl have that keeps them from drawing or sharing it or whatever. anyway art's cool i love art. gonna go draw now probably :D #ALSO really funny watching the way i drew myself change. all in ways that make sense but still funny to me. long hair glasses girl you'd #probably keel over if you saw what we look like now. hell yeah

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#sometimes i find the degree to which i cannot concentrate very alarming #like bro i canno read. i have so much to do but i wanna sleep forever #i just have to get up and go somewhere else. normally id go transfer algae or run but im stuck inside and .y fingers r all cold #usually its just in the morning that I get thr high distress so its prob the meds #but yesterday was kinda fucked. ugh.i just need to run around but i cant #i have such a sinister combo of: brain stops me from being able to b productive and if im not productive i am compelled to do horrible #things. mood issues and 0cd is horrible. horrible feedback loop #i just wish i could breathe. itll b fine. eventually itll b summer again and itll b fine #its like someone's squeezing my throat. like im sick but i kno its just that im anxious #i was doing so well the past few days in terms of reading and productivity despite the distress #and im trying to b kind and roll with the punches but its so hard #like i kno i need to relax and not resist bc resistance makes it worse but it's just hard and im worried this is how itll always b #i wish i could go back on lamicta1. i felt way better on low dose of that then i do on low dose of abi1ify. its so hard to stay on this #just bc of how my head works. and like things were complicated with the lamicta1. maybe i wouldnt habe had a reaction if i didnt get a #tatto0 while upping the dose but now im marked as allergic so i prob wont b allowed to try any of thr anti convulsive type antidepressants #ugh. i hate this. its so frustrating #unrelated

[emmafallsinlove]

better man is a song that i specifically dedicate to my father every time i hear it <3

#i mean i think i’m past tolerate it imo AKAJSJSKSK #i mean….. i am sad #and most days i don’t evem feel it or i’m so used to not having my father around #by my own choice obviously but sometimes i do wish that things were differents #and i always appreciated my mom’s side of the family to see things from my perspective #anyway im just sad brb gonna listen to better man and cry again i think #or speaks now

[laniidae-passerine]

Honestly I think Dean Highbottom has some shit to answer to as well. The mockery, the derision, the outright admittance that he was hoping Coriolanus would fail and the Snow family would continue to suffer. How someone who loathed the Games still treated a young man with cruelty because of the past, because of social divides that would be so easy to tear down. In the end, it wasn’t just Gaul who shaped Snow into the man he became. So bitter and hateful. So incapable of compassion and forgiveness. Just like his father. Just like his Dean.

#like yeah there were a lot of things questionable about Snow even before he was chosen as a mentor in the games #but like. damn. you didn’t even consider the idea he could be better than his father did you? #the way kindness could have unravelled some of the hate in Snow’s heart #listen to me tell you the horrible things your father did. listen to me tell you that you can be different. you are not the past. #the divides between us do not truly exist. look at the weapon in your hand. it is real. and it can do real damage #but if you never hate someone - if they never fool you into letting violence into your heart - they can never make you use it #it breaks my heart. how could you hate a ghost so much that you’d kill a child. I don’t know. but the Dean does. and so does Snow. #the cycles run and run until somebody stops. and burns some bread. and shares berries. and takes an arrow. and says no more. I love you #it is difficult. it could hurt me. it could be the very last thing I do. it may not even serve me well. but I love you. I love. always. #how pathetic hate makes you. how strong love makes you. like staring at the Dean and staring at characters like Haymitch #like two substance abusing men who know the system inside out. who are complicit. who are victims. both embittered and angry. #but one saw a child and decided to punish him for the past #and the other saw a child and decided - okay. it’s been 23 years. my heart hurts. I want to give in. I want to hate you. I want to not care. #I’m going to care anyway. I’m in so much pain. It’s killing me. I’m going to care anyway. about you both. it won’t be perfect. but I care. #and I’ll be here through hell. and I will fuck up. so fucking badly. because I’m still addicted and angry and god knows I have suffered. #god knows these hands are bloody and they always will be. but I will keep coming back. I will keep trying. I will still love. #and in the end I will write names in a book that belongs to you and I will find a little bit of peace in a house where the sun shines #and the geese make ridiculous noises in the yard. and love will have seen me through. #HAYMITCH YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS I LOVE YOU MY IMPERFECT DARLING #dean highbottom #coriolanus snow #the hunger games #a ballad of songbirds and snakes #haymitch abernathy #thg #abosas #suzanne collins #SHE WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS

[cnl0400]

So the news came out and some players already have got the last chat in the OG game (Devildom funtime Zoo 2, source Is the OBM Wiki) I can't say I didn't say this coming but...

I'm sad, I get It that they can't suport It forever, but as stupid that It sounds, I was only checking the OG game for

Farming cards I didn't get on Lonely Devil

Chats with Thirteen (and Raphael, but he messages us less)

Yes, I guess It's my fault for "falling" for a secondary character, but still, Nightbringer Is still young and since it's a "reset", most of the stuff Is with the brothers and the side characters are the afterthough (Just look how they didn't even give the side characters costumes. They are dateable and almost half of the LIs, that's just unfair)

I'm really dreadful to waiting to the first NB aniversary so "maybe" they make her dateable, I want to think that maybe they Will in the next ObeyMAX (If they keep doing It at all) since they said they are planning "something" with the trio in the AMA but I'm not holding my breath, this and the whole Asmodeus Birthday thing really let my mood down, wish that at least the devs were more transparent with what they're doing...

#obey me #post0400 #is it really my fault when she was announced for people to enjoy 'regardless of gender or preference'? #sorry for the rant but I guess it's something I have been thinking since the past anniversary #I've always felt that I have no room to complain about the lack of 13 content because she isn't tecnically dateable yet #but she was so nice in the anniversary that I thought things would get better this year... I guess not? lol #at least put her again in the Memory cards from the events #that's were I got my crumbs of her...

[araneitela]

What type of villain are you?

No Moral Compass: You are cold, analytical, and you strive to be as objective as a person of flesh and blood can be. Either don't understand the concepts of good and evil, or you understand it perfectly and think it's a load of bull. Some may call you selfish, some may call you unfeeling, but you're just doing what you believe will yield the best results, plain and simple. Why bother with petty ideals of right or wrong when you can do what will actively help those you give a fuck about? Your goals may be selfish or noble or anything in between, but you will not let anyone make you feel like garbage for going after them. You couldn't care less about what people brand you as. You just care about getting shit done by any means necessary.

Tagged by: @pluvianguis (I know you tagged my Guizhong, but I hope you don't mind! 💖) Tagging: @inominati (Caelus), @helldevour, @resolutepath (Elio), @luminaei, @icefell, @kanxing, @etherealguard, @sagnaevi (Neuv! I'm really curious), @hxkerwxlf, @narvvhal (please call out your boy), and anyone else who wants it— steal it and say I tagged you so I can read. <3

#[ et cetera. ] seems i came at a bad time. / no no; i think you couldn't have timed it better. 23:47:15. very punctual; kafka. #[ i always worry about these because even when they're accurate; there's always some little tidbits that firmly contradict the rest. ] #[ but this was pretty accurate all the way through apart from some approaches like 'think good/evil is a load of bull' because it's more.. #[ complicated than that obviously. but in a general superficial gist-- yeah. that's it. ] #[ thing is-- she truly does play into the concept of that it doesn't matter to her how people perceive her or what they think she's like. ] #[ she's far past that. noble intentions for those she does care about or whether it's for selfish gains-- it simply doesn't matter. ] #[ if anything; having negative thoughts about her only means she's on your mind. it means you're unnerved but more importantly... ] #[ it means you remember her. it means she's crossed your mind. to someone like kafka-- that's only a gain. ] #[ the smiles she gave himeko and march 7th were genuine. but they only are for the extent that they are part of a game. ] #[ that's why they matter because she allows them to matter. she invites it. but beyond the games; she spares them no thought. ] #[ none whatsoever. ] #[ it's the same with something like a bounty-- it plays into this arrogance that she's perfectly aware that she has. ] #[ but ultimately yep-- what matters is the goal that she seeks and then throughout that journey... ] #[ the goals of those who she might become close to will come to matter as well. the stellaron hunters for example. ] #[ but even there-- some more than others. ]

[fourteenthz]

Always thinking abt how thesa/thancred know everything abt the other. How he is the one that can tell what she's feeling just by looking into her eyes.

And then how for the first time ever in amaurot he doesn't recognize what's happening inside her head. And how in ultima thule, when he sees it again, he learns something new about her that no one ever will. Lies down.

#he's the one that doesn't expect her to always be a hero always the one trying to pull the weight off of her because he knows her and knows #how hard it is for her. and he is the only one that does for the longest time. and then he feels entirely off the loop by the end of shb #bc they are so close to being something and he thinks that knowing her so genuinely is a point in his favor #only to realize that there's something so heavy abt her that he doesn't understand at all. he doesn't know that she doesn't either by then #so it just. weights him just as hard. for him to go patches like accepting that whatever. he still knows her so that will come to light #one day or another. and it does just when they are all back in ultima thule. just when he's councious again and he learns that. #not by her telling him but just genuinely watching her like he learnt most things from her. except this is different #so he just stands there. everybody else overwhelmed by everything else while he has to ruminates that new thing as well. #that 'they don't know' party meme but it's thancred watching scions celebrate and hug each other #while he slowly realizes that part of his girlfriend will never truly be known to him like it was for mf emet-selch and whoever that was #that a part of her is lost with them and maybe that's fine. bc other part of her is now hugging the twins and staring directly at him #and begging for him to come closer to her with her eyes. a part of her that didn't beg either of the other two to stay longer like she'd #been praying for him since she set foot in ultima thule. so that. that's nice. he isn't competing for anything ever #he has that part of hers to love and he is loved just as much by that part of her so yeah. it's nice I think. #...... I'm fine don't look at me. #i like how independent from each other they are and still despite that how damn in love they are. #something about the huge slow burn I have for them in my head helps me tackle that idea so much better. #like how they love for one another grew from just. how deeply theh trusted and respected each other over the years #so that will always be the base of their feelings..... sits down. they are just SO AKSJDJA BITES MY FISTS #sometimes I'm like 'i will thow away my wolship at any minute if canon suggests something entirely different' and other times im like #bitting wolcred hard. no one take it away from me pls they are my extremely respectful and healthy relationship. #dont touch them they are healing. pls. WAIT. #does this damn post means anything to anyone but me???? idek I just like the idea of thesa being so okay with emet and hythlo even #when deep down something in her isn't at all. (its me I'm not ok about them) but also she just. knows who she is at this point. #and she knows the ones behind her are the ones that she loves. its SO MUCH mirroring emet's 'the past we knew/loved' quote #SHE SEES THAG SO CLEARLY. and having that moment in ultima thule being the moment only 1 other person sees it as well. and it's mf thancred #in the end I just adore them and the whole 'you are you and its that you that I love' that they have. not who they were or what anyone else #see of them. nerds in love. disgusting. i need to make them kiss rn or I'll riot. why am I having those thoughts mid creative block DAMN IT #kelly says #wol posting

[daincrediblegg]

I love you historically oriented youtube shows that dispel myths akin to “the old thing was worse and not as good as today” you are my whole life

#specifically bernadette banner and her obliteration of ‘corsets are restrictive’ and max miller with ‘food from the past was bad’ #you fucking GET them kings and queens #tell em about how corsets were shaped better with whale bones and served well as supportive garments and not organ re-arranging torture #devices just for women specifically. max you KILL the notion that people of the past didn’t have the ability to make good and flavorful #food regardless of class and culture and means #really those posts about ‘humans have always been humans’ are fucking RIGHT #I fucking love that shit. I really do. I love learning about how practical things from the past actually were