#Trauma tw

[compassionatereminders]

Yeah it sucks how some neurotypicals have watered down the term trigger, but the solution isn't to claim that only severely traumatized people have triggers. Most mental health issues can be triggered. If you have OCD and something makes your intrusive thoughts spike up, that was a trigger. If you are autistic and something makes your sensory issues flare up, that was a trigger. If you have depression and something makes you have suicidal thoughts, that was a trigger. If you have anxiety and something makes it worse, that was a trigger. It isn't just PTSD which can get triggered

#disability #kat gets serious #suicidal ideation tw #trauma tw

[soulprompts]

HEROIC INTERVENTION. ( A PROMPT LIST! )

so i was writing this headcanon for one of my characters, and it got me thinking about how some characters are absolutely, to their very core, protectors, and even then they still need protecting! so i made this list which is similar to about five other memes i've made. feel free to add a "reverse" if you so wish! DO NOT ADD TO THIS LIST NOR CLAIM IT AS YOUR OWN. THANK YOU.

FROM THE SENDER TO THE THREAT:

[ TO THE THREAT ]: " is there a problem over here? "

[ TO THE THREAT ]: " can i help you with something? "

[ TO THE THREAT ]: " i think it's time you were leaving. "

[ TO THE THREAT ]: " why don't you and i go outside for a sec? "

[ TO THE THREAT ]: " you wanna tell me why you're hassling my friend? "

[ TO THE THREAT ]: " you better start running before i really get pissed. "

[ TO THE THREAT ]: " i'm sure there's a rational explanation behind you upsetting this person? "

[ TO THE THREAT ]: " i hope you're not thinking of staying here a moment longer. "

[ TO THE THREAT ]: " get out. "

[ TO THE THREAT ]: " right, either you leave or i kick you out. your choice. "

[ TO THE THREAT ]: " i think it's fairly obvious my friend doesn't want anything to do with you, don't you? "

[ TO THE THREAT ]: " leave them alone. now. "

[ TO THE THREAT ]: " didn't you hear them? back off! "

[ TO THE THREAT ]: " don't even think of pretending you didn't hear me the first time: leave! "

FROM THE SENDER TO THE RECEIVER:

[ TO THE RECEIVER ]: " hey, are you okay? "

[ TO THE RECEIVER ]: " don't worry. i'll take care of this. "

[ TO THE RECEIVER ]: " why don't you go on out back? i got this, it's okay. "

[ TO THE RECEIVER ]: " here. you go on into the car, alright? i'm right behind you. "

[ TO THE RECEIVER ]: " is this person bothering you? "

[ TO THE RECEIVER ]: " it's okay. hey, hey… look at me. they're gone. "

[ TO THE RECEIVER ]: " hey… what's going on? what's wrong? i… has this person said something to you? "

[ TO THE RECEIVER ]: " it's alright. the others just went out to the car; why don't you join them? i'll handle this. "

[ TO THE RECEIVER ]: " hey, hey… talk to me, huh? what's the matter? you look like you've seen a ghost… who was that? "

[ TO THE RECEIVER ]: " don't be scared. i'm going to take care of this. i promise. "

[ TO THE RECEIVER ]: " you don't need to say anything. just nod if you want me to kick them out, okay? "

[ TO THE RECEIVER ]: " you're alright. i'm right here, don't worry. and they'll be gone before you can blink, that's another promise. "

ACTIONS:

[ HAND ]: sender, having seen the receiver's encounter with the threat, gently takes the receiver's hand to assure them they aren't alone.

[ INTERVENE ]: sender wordlessly steps in between the receiver and the threat, facing the threat while shielding the receiver from them.

[ BLOCK ]: sender steps in between the receiver and the threat, this time facing the receiver while turning their back to the threat and blocking them from the receiver's line of sight.

[ BACK ]: sender places a protective and gentle hand on the receiver's back, preparing to guide them away from the threat.

[ DOOR ]: sender firmly but politely insists that the threat leave the building, and escorts them out of the door.

[ EXIT ]: sender physically catches hold of the threat and drags them away from the receiver, and outside of the building.

[ PUSH ]: sender places a careful hand on the threat to keep them at arm's length, and steps forward again to give the receiver more space between them and the threat.

[ SHOVE ]: sender runs over and forcefully shoves the threat back and away from the receiver.

[ SPACE ]: sender pushes between the receiver and the threat and begins to move forward, invading the threat's personal space as both a means of intimidation and a way of getting them away from the receiver.

[ DIVERT ]: sender arrives behind the threat and gains their attention, distracting them from the receiver so as to give them time to leave the area.

[ CLEAR ]: the sender firmly and clearly tells the threat that they are no longer allowed in the premises nor anywhere near the receiver.

[ ARM ]: sender wraps a protective arm around the receiver and guides them away from the threat and out of the premises.

[ PUNCH ]: the sender, having seen the receiver's reaction to the threat and the threat's lack of consideration, moves forward and punches the threat in the face.

#rp meme #rp starters #rp memes #rp prompt #protective prompts #rp prompts #writing prompts #writing prompt #roleplay memes #roleplay prompt #roleplay prompts #roleplay meme #roleplay starters #sentence starters #trauma tw #violence tw

[sneakerdoodle]

what i expected more people to talk about with Mentopolis is how it represents trauma. how Conrad hangs onto a core, defining memory that dwells in the depth of the subconscious (he lives in the Red District!), how that traumatic experience became internalized in a way that is very directly implied to have affected Elias' behaviour and personal choices throughout his entire adult life; how Elias himself literally does not have the memory of it, and the part of his consciousness that holds it is singled out and sectioned off and isolated, and forever stunted in its development. how Conrad holds the memory, and that's why the voice of conscience is so rarely accessed - because to come into contact with it would be to come into contact with the memory, and that would be excruciating, and so Conrad is neglected and forgotten because Elias cannot have one without the other. something so deeply poignant about a profound experience unconsciously influencing the way Elias moves through life, without him even being consciously aware of it, and without the option to safely reflect back on it

and then the lose-lose of a traumatic response, how the severing of his conscience was an expression of a self-protective instinct: get rid of this, don't act like this and you will be safe from experiencing such pain again. and holding the memory is part of hurting, and so repressing it is part of the self-preserving urge - but this unconscious choice, made by Elias as a hurt, scared child, led him to shut out an entire function of his conscious. how, in a way, his very employment choice could be considered reckless. how our responses to trauma, in a desperate attempt to keep us safe after a harrowing, incomprehensible event, often only expose us to more danger, with no option to escape it as we are unable to process the root of it and we're only 2 freakin episodes in

#dimension 20 #mentopolis #d20 mentopolis #trauma tw

[star-anise]

reading supercut: disability, body image, and trauma

A glimpse into the clothes thrashing around in the washing machine of my mind, with apologies that it is still a wet lump and not an actual synthesis of ideas.

From Easy Beauty: A Memoir by Chloé Cooper Jones:

[This event] embedded a damaging idea in me, one I’d recognize deeply when I read Scarry years later: beauty was a matter of particulars aligning correctly. My body put me in a bracketed, undercredited sense of beauty. But if I could get the particulars lined up just right, I could be re-seen, discovered like the palm tree is discovered. To be deserving of the whole range of human desires, I had to be extraordinary in all other aspects. In this new light, I started to see my work, my intellect, my skills, my moments of humor or goodness, not as valuable in themselves, but as ways of easing the impact of my ugliness. If only I could pile up enough good qualities, they could obscure my unacceptable body. [...] accepting the argument that beauty was malleable came, for me, with a cost. The Platonian view rejected me cleanly, but Hume and Scarry left a door ajar and I’ve spent a lifetime trying to contort my form to see if I could pass through it.

From Til We Have Faces: A Myth Retold by CS Lewis:

I now determined that I would go always veiled. I have kept this rule, within doors and without, ever since. It is a sort of treaty made with my ugliness. There had been a time in childhood when I didn't yet know I was ugly. Then there was a time (for in this book I must hide none of my shames or follies) when I believed, as girls do — and as Batta was always telling me — that I could make it more tolerable by this or that done to my clothes or my hair. Now, I chose to be veiled.

From Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy of Borderline Personality Disorder by Marsha Linehan:

Inhibited grieving is understandable among borderline patients. People can only stay with a very painful process or experience if they are confident that it will end some day, some time—that they can "work through it," so to speak. It is not uncommon to hear borderline patients say they feel that if they ever do cry, they will never stop Indeed, that is their common experience—the experience of not being able to control or modulate their own emotional experiences. [...] In the face of such helplessness and lack of control, inhibition and avoidance of cues associated with grieving are not only understandable, bur perhaps wise at times. Inhibition, however, has its costs. [...] Volkan (1983) describes an interesting phenomenon, "established pathological mourning", which is similar to the pattern I am describing. In established pathological mourning, the individual wishes to complete mourning, but at the same time persistently attempts to undo the reality of the loss.

From How to Respond to Criticism by Danny Lavery:

Apologize, but don’t really mean it, and plant a seed of secret resentment so deep in your own heart that years later you can’t even remember that you’re the one who nurtured it and made it grow, it seems that much like a native part of you.

From Tiny Beautiful Things by Cheryl Strayed:

[After learning that state child protective services had made a budgetary decision to only intervene with children under 12, to one of the teenagers that regularly shared stories of abuse at home] I told her it was not okay, that it was unacceptable, that it was illegal and that I would call and report this latest, horrible thing. But I did not tell her it would stop. I did not promise that anyone would intervene. I told her it would likely go on and she’d have to survive it. That she’d have to find a way within herself to not only escape the shit, but to transcend it [...] I told her that escaping the shit would be hard, but that if she wanted to not make her mother’s life her destiny, she had to be the one to make it happen. She had to do more than hold on. She had to reach. She had to want it more than she’d ever wanted anything. She had to grab like a drowning girl for every good thing that came her way and she had to swim like fuck away from every bad thing. She had to count the years and let them roll by, to grow up and then run as far as she could in the direction of her best and happiest dreams across the bridge that was built by her own desire to heal.

From Essays in Aesthetics by Jean-Paul Sartre:

Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you.

From "I Know What You Think of Me" by Tim Kreider:

if we want the rewards of being loved we have to submit to the mortifying ordeal of being known.

#mental health tw #trauma tw #child abuse tw #child neglect tw #staranise original #kinda #there's also a lot I've been reading about avoidant personality disorder that DEFINITELY needs a lot more baking #before it's ready to be unleashed onto the public

[soulrph]

" 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐔𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐓 𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 "  𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒.

a wonderfully patient and creative nonnie asked for a list of prompts based on interactions between two good friends in the aftermath of a trauma that happens to one of them, and i’m nothing if not a sucker for angst and deeply emotional connections! so here we go! i’m hoping these will be up to the nonnie’s expectations! have a wonderful day, my lovelies, and DO NOT ADD TO THIS LIST !!

“ i really hate seeing you like this... “

“ why don’t we hang out tonight? like we used to, you know? order in cheap take-out, watch crappy movies, go for a walk... whatever you want, right? “

“ please say something... anything. even if it’s telling me to shut up and leave you alone... just say something. “

“ i really miss you, you know. “

“ i’m here. you got that? i don’t care if you never say anything to me ever again. i don’t care. i’m not going away, and i’m not going to stop being here for you, no matter how long you glare at me or ignore me or pretend that you’re okay. because i know you’re not. i know. “

“ talk to me. i don’t care what we talk about. it doesn’t have to be anything big. we don’t need to talk about whatever happened to you, not unless you want to. i just... just talk to me, will you? “

“ you know, i talk to a lot of people every single day. i hear all their voices telling me all kinds of stuff; i hear it all. and the only voice i really wanna listen to is yours, you know? even when you’re driving me crazy. so come on. please... just drive me crazy again? “

“ ...seriously? no come-back? no witty retort? no... sarcastic shot at me? come on, i... i know we never ask these things, but, honestly, i’m worried about you. what’s going on? “

“ penny for your thoughts? hell. a dollar? ten? fifty? my whole life-savings? damn, at this rate i’d give away everything i own just to hear your voice again. “

“ this is like, the ninth voicemail i’ve left, and i know you hate voicemails, so i’m thinking this might be the one that pisses you off enough to pick up the phone and talk to me. because despite the number of times i’ve told you to shut up, i’m actually begging you to say something, now. weird how things work out, isn’t it? anyway. pick up your freaking phone, moron. please. “

“ will you please talk to me? please? “

“ i have exhausted every single topic that i can think of to get you to open your mouth and say something to me. all of them. you leave me no choice... how are you? “

“ listen, we’re all really worried about you. okay? and we wanna help you, but we don’t know how. so how about you write us a note, or something? maybe just, open the door, huh? i just wanna know that you’re okay. “

“ you’re not alone, you know. you’ve got people who love you. who care about you. you’ve got me. and i’m not going anywhere. “

“ look, i don’t know what happened to you. and i don’t need you to tell me, okay? i don’t... i just want you to know that i’m here. i got you. no matter what. and if you need some space, then... then i can leave. just tell me what you need, okay? “

“ i don’t need you to say anything. you don’t even need to open the door. i’m just gonna slide this paper under the door, okay? you tell me what you want for dinner, and i’ll bring it up. “

“ i’m sending you on a list of therapists and group support meetings in the area, okay? you don’t have to go, but... promise me you’ll take a look at the list, right? “

“ listen, i know you gave me a copy of your key for emergencies, and this feels like an emergency, but... if the silent treatment is part of you trying to get some space, then i don’t wanna intrude. you know? so just text me if that’s what this is, and i’ll leave you alone. “

“ i know, i know. you asked me to leave you alone. but that was two weeks ago, okay? and i haven’t heard from you. you aren’t answering my texts, you aren’t even reading them. nobody’s seen or heard from you, and... and now i just want to know that you’re okay. so please, open your door, and let me make sure that you’re safe, will you? “

#rp meme #rp prompt #rp prompts #roleplay meme #roleplay prompts #roleplay prompt #writing prompts #writing prompt #dialogue prompt #dialogue prompts #trauma tw #ptsd tw #depression tw

[brain-rot-central]

ok so has anyone made a list of things that Astarion said that had a different meaning than first thought?

For example, if you tell Astarion when you first meet that you’re Baldurian as well, he says they must not be in the same social circle. With the way he talks and dresses it seems like he’s implying you’re lower class, but later it becomes clear you’re not those petty criminals or brothel goers that he targets. (And there’s the separate “of course it’ll turn me into a monster” line that becomes obvious later.)

He reveals he fears breaking his nail to the dryad, and it seems shallow but we learn he’s traumatized by digging himself out of his coffin, and the year he endured being trapped inside a coffin and desperately scratching and breaking his nails off as punishment, which is also why he refuses to dig anyone out like Nere.

Also, he mentioned he targeted brothel visitors, and at first it sounds like he just waited outside those establishments for victims, but then if you visit the drow twins he mentions he never thought he’d be on the paying end, plus if you choose one of the twins then Astarion says you have a type for elven prostitutes. And if you really think about it, considering how Petras’ lines are similar to Astarion’s, it wouldn’t be weird to imagine Cazador forcing them to work at a brothel for a few years as training…

Some of Astarion’s lines have a lot to unpack

Many things Astarion says are doublespeak. It's a common coping mechanism used by trauma survivors to "make peace," in a way with what they went through. It's not until you've played through his whole story that you understand that, and honestly it breaks my heart. He has a lot of self-depreciating language. Little quips here and there where you realize he's not only commenting on the current situation but himself, as well.

The monster line in the beginning gets me the most, because he follows it up with, "What did I expect?" For the first time in 200 years, he's able to stand in the sun without burning. He's grappling with that entire realization while also readjusting to there being light and color in the world, and probably was looking at the whole Nautiloid experience as something slightly positive... only to learn that no, this is not something positive. In fact, it's horrendous, because if it's not rectified, he'll become a grotesque monster, worse than he already is. And idk, that guts me. He has this small glimmer of hope for the first time in two centuries, all to realize that it's a giant farce.

But, Astarion is also stubborn, so he holds onto this small glimmer of hope to see if there's a way he can work the tadpole to his advantage. So that he can continue to walk in the sun. Once he realizes that Cazador's compulsion has been interrupted due to the tadpole, he doubles down on wanting to keep the tadpole and control it.

Astarion's story is such a beautiful portrayal of what being in survival mode feels and is like. You're so entirely desperate to make it out of your current situation that you would quite literally give anything and everything to obtain it, even if it means burning the entire world down around you.

The elven prostitute line made me laugh when I first heard it; I knew he was referring to himself and trying to make some light humor about his past, but it's also heartbreaking to realize he sees himself as one. He hasn't yet taken the grace with himself to distinguish between being forced into that line of work vs who he actually is. The lines are still blurred.

I can't think about the intricacies of his background/personality too long, because it all feels way too familiar to me. To know even a smidge of the despair he probably felt for years and the constant mental and physical struggle he endured (there's even disordered eating/food insecurity in his back story too and no one really talks much about it; Cazador purposely kept all the spawn near-starving as a form of control).

Our boy was severely abused and neglected and I really just want to give him a fucking hug.

#astarion #trauma tw #i mean i totally get why he burns down the palace post game #i probably would too #like how could you not want to do that #neech's speeches #answered

[howlingtothevoid]

I hate what you've done to me!!!

...

So why do I still miss you?

#web weave #web weaving #webweaving #on grief #childhood trauma #trauma tw #on trauma #canine poetry #canine kin #childhood grief #familial love #trauma poetry #missing

[cornettotism]

No cause, actually, when you really listen closely to the crumbs of Laszlo's backstory, none of the adult figures were very good to him at all.

He hardly remembers his mother. His father was dismissive of his passion for art, and his nanny was just. Weird.

He plays it off as though it was normal, but he obviously did not have a normal childhood at all and I hate that no one talks about it more often.

#laszlo cravensworth #trauma tw #childhood trauma #what we do in the shadows #wwdits #poor guy actually

[cascigarette]

it's really interesting to me how they wrote and how jarpad played sam's trauma from the cage through the soulless sam arc and the hallucifer arc. like when he's soulless he's very much like dissociated out of body hypersexual kind of trauma response with memory gaps and no real sense of self. when he gets his soul back he does sort of a 180. he's overwhelmed, he's hallucinating, having intense flashbacks, using self harm to ground himself, feeling hyposexual, he can't help but remember. I just find it interesting to see his initial trauma from the cage and how it changes over time, how it changes him

#ive just been learning about trauma and how ive been changed by trauma in ways i didnt realize before #and i find myself similar to a lot of his responses #and it feels sort of validating to me weirdly bc in my head im very prone to be like yeah no that wasnt a big deal #ur making a big deal out of nothing etc etc #just a lot of minimizing #which sam does too #if i had more coherence rn id go more in depth with his trauma responses but im feeling kind of out of it today so this is what ive got #sam winchester #sam and lucifer #hallucifer #soulless sam #spn #trauma tw #ask to tag #mine #sh mention

[alicewritingstories]

I finally started writing the fic I planned based on a combination of two of @kikker-oma's Whumptober arts!

First, Day 3: Make it stop/Empty Room + Moon.

They had been in this new Hyrule for two days and the overwhelming impression was simply that it was huge. Time wasn't sure how they could even begin to track down black-blooded monsters or this era's hero.

At least they had been able to get some directions at the odd horse-crested tent they had encountered earlier that day: the Dueling Peaks Stable, the man at the desk had proudly informed them. Another nearby whose entire job was apparently to give directions had pointed them to Kakariko Village just up the road, tucked away in the mountains.

This Hyrule was huge. By the time they trudged wearily into the village, night was falling. They treated themselves to beds in the inn, filling it to the point where Time ended up in his own tiny room in the attic. The innkeeper apologized as she put fresh blankets on the bed, but Time shook his head with a smile. "It's far better than many places I've slept," he said. "Thank you."

They ate dinner together - it was Time's turn to cook and he grilled some fish at the communal cooking fire, trying not to char them for once - then retired to bed early. Apparently this era's Impa was the village elder. In the morning, they would try to get an audience with her and find out more about this world.

Time removed his armor and flopped down on the bed, looking out of the curtainless window. The village was entirely surrounded by the odd, tall pillar-like mountains, but he could see some stars gleaming above the peaks. Below, he could hear the voices of his boys as they settled for bed and he smiled, his eyelid drooping wearily. Perhaps soon their group of eight would be nine. He wondered what the new hero would be like. A soldier like Warriors? They'd not seen much sign of organized armies. In this huge, sparse realm, he was probably a wanderer like Wind or Hyrule.

As he fell asleep, Time hoped he'd meet him soon.

He woke suddenly and his eye fell first on the window.

And on the moon glaring down from over the mountains.

It was blood-red.

Time bolted upright in bed, staring up at the moon, gasping for breath. This couldn't be real. He was dreaming. He had to be.

Still struggling for air, he raised a hand to pinch his arm. The sharp pain changed nothing, so he did it again, harder.

The moon above was still red.

Time felt like a hand was squeezing his throat. He twisted aside, swinging his legs off the bed and turning his back to the window, struggling to breathe, frozen as his mind stuttered.

He had to move.

You're not there.

He was frozen in place.

He could feel the seconds running by.

Where was his ocarina?

This village… They were all…

There's no face, it's not the same, it's not, it's not…

He stared at the red light on the floor.

He had to reach his boys before…

He had to…

Why can't I move?

#my fanfic #lu time #trauma tw #kikker oma

[compassionatereminders]

But I do think part of healing from trauma means sometimes giving people the chance to treat you right. And no, I'm not talking about forgiving your abusers. Or giving random people endless chances to hurt you. But sometimes you gotta fight that voice that says everyone just wants to harm you and give someone a chance to get close enough to actually prove it wrong.

#recovery #trauma #relationships #kat gets serious #trauma tw #abuse tw

[uncanny-tranny]

I hold so much love to the people for whom trauma has seeped away their perspective of time - warping and distorting it to where one can't feel time passing. Everything is moving simultaneously too slow and too fast - everything is a blur, and the only constant is the Trauma/s or trauma/s. You aren't just "you" anymore, but you are you and your trauma, and together, for better or worse, you walk as one.

I hope you are well, dear reader. May you find peace between yourself and the things that have happened. May you be permitted to feel everything you feel, for nothing is wrong with how you feel. I hope you grant yourself the space to be, that you may be able to do that because it's hard.

#mental health #mental health support #trauma #trauma tw #reflecting on some trauma feels right now #i feel it most accurate to say that i am not me but i am me and my traumatized self. it makes it easier to visualize #because i was too young to have gone through what i had and it just reminds me that it wasn't My Fault #so that last part in the first paragraph was kind of me recognizing that for the first time truly actually

[b4st4rd-420]

#tw trauma #trauma tw #vent edit #vent post #vent

[the-monologues]

Imagine that soul-crushing moment when your trauma makes you think like them (your abuser) and you start doubting yourself and your trauma. You fear on your dear life questioning, "What if I become like them?"

No heartbreak, no person can make you hate yourself like those realizations will.

#tw ptsd #trauma tw #complex ptsd #ptsd #trauma talks #trauma #childhood trauma #post traumatic stress disorder #self loathing #self healing #trauma healing #thoughts #rambling monologues #fucking hate this #fucking hate myself

[frownyalfred]

*busts down your doors* HEY! Long ask for ya

okay so I was rereading your fic where EMS showed up because Dick couldn’t flip on the trampoline (rip) and it got me thinking about routine trauma.

So here’s the thing: I am not EMS. I know three people who are EMS, but my extent of EMS experience comes from one (1) ride along and lurking on EMS subreddits. Those guys are a hoot. Great memes. Anyways.

A comment stuck out to me: “You haven’t truly lived the job until you’re eating a gas station burrito next to a dead body”. I’ve seen a bunch like that. Nonchalance and dark humor because well, that’s their job. Gore is the norm. Sure, depending on the area, your usual calls might just be lift assists, but other areas are neck deep in gang violence and violent crime.

A pretty common post on that subreddit is also, sadly, “I just got a call that’s never bothered me before but all of a sudden I’m broken” or “I’ve never had a problem running this type of call before but all of a sudden it just hit me.” Delayed trauma is a bitch. Someone pointed out that if a civilian saw a fatal car accident with multiple corpses, they’d be in therapy and given support and it’d be a huge deal. With EMS, they’re just expected to deal with it. (EMS mental health is getting better- there are helplines and resources and first responder focused therapies- but it’s still a developing field)

ANYWAYS, now that I’ve given you a crash course on the EMS mental health crisis (someone should really write a feature on EMS in Gotham those fuckers would be crazy and I love them already), my point is, how would this apply to the bats? Seeing bodies is treated as very much the norm to them, but do you think it ever just… catches up? The impact of seeing corpses day after day? Do you think they have to fake being fine and tough during those times because well, “everybody else in the family is fine with it, I’m not going to be a liability/burden/weak/etc”

Do you think Bruce, the goddamn batman, who shouldn’t be ruffled by anything, ever just feels something crack inside when he looks at a little boy who could have grown up healthy and strong like his Jason, had (Bruce) someone been there for him? and then he can’t work cases with kids for a week?

This is such an excellent ask, thank you so much for gracing my inbox with it!

It's a very good question. I'm also on a lot of those subreddits (needed to do some research for that fic) and the discussion in those forums and on TikTok is like you described, a kind of practiced desensitization to all gore and suffering in order to survive in their job.

What I've seen from those discussions (and my EMT friend) is an almost sub-conscious trend where they allow themselves the "thing" that breaks them, and they push a lot of that trauma and emotion onto that thing. Like an EMT saying they don't do kids, or they don't do gunshots to the eye, etc. And they'll sob like a baby on those calls, while remaining stone-faced and level-headed through the triple homicide.

I'm just theorizing here, but I imagine the Batfamily uses similar coping skills -- pushing all that trauma and suffering into a box which cracks only under limited, defined circumstances. And they break or snap only under those conditions, because, subconsciously, they allowed themselves to.

So yes, Bruce might be 99% fine with most of the bodies he sees, but there might be a little boy who has a detail (like Jason's dark hair) that just slams into him out of nowhere.

PTSD and trauma literally change the structure of the brain. Individuals react differently to trauma after that, but there does appear to be a "desensitizing" effect with repeated trauma, as the body tries to compensate.

I agree that the Gotham EMTs must be some crazy motherfuckers. They probably deal with 6x the normal shit EMTs deal with in other cities. They probably take on a lot more trauma and burn out quicker than other EMTs, too.

Anyone else have thoughts on this? I admit I don't cover PTSD explicitly in a lot of my fics.

#ptsd #trauma tw #ptsd tw #death tw #bruce wayne #dc #batman #myfic #theresurrectionist #batfamily #batfamily meta #bruce wayne meta #batman meta #asks

[subsystems]

Let's talk about longitudinal studies on dissociation!

First off, what is a longitudinal study? This is a type of academic experiment where researchers study the same group of volunteers over a long period of time, usually several years. It's very effective for seeing how the same things change over time, such as how people might develop dissociative disorders.

The longitudinal study I want to share is "Development and the fragmented self: longitudinal study of dissociative symptomatology in a nonclinical sample" by researchers Ogawa, Sroufe, Weinfield, Carlson, and Egeland. This was a longitudinal study over the span of 19 years, looking to investigate the emergence of pathological dissociation in a person.

Experiencing dissociation is normal to some extent! But pathological dissociation is described as severe & abnormal dissociation such as amnesia, identity confusion, identity fragmentation, and depersonalization & derealization.

Okay, now let's talk about the study. The study followed 168 children from birth to 19 years old. They were in "at-risk" families which experienced things like poverty or a teenage parent. Here's what the study discovered after 19 years:

Trauma is necessary but not sufficient for pathological dissociation. Not every child who experienced trauma ended up dissociative. Every child who did develop pathological dissociation, however, experienced trauma.

Pathological dissociation is predicted by trauma occurring at 0-24 months of age. The older the children got, the less likely pathological dissociation was to develop.

Pathological dissociation is also predicted by trauma that is severe and chronic.

Pathological dissociation is predicted by attachment style. Children with disorganized attachment to their mothers had the highest dissociation scores. Children who had anxious/avoidant attachment with their mothers had higher dissociation scores than children with secure or anxious/ambivalent attachment.

The more integrated a child's sense of self is, the less likely they will develop pathological dissociation.

The environments that produced the most severe trauma also produced the most chronic trauma, while environments that produced the least severe trauma also produced the least chronic trauma. Likewise, the children who experienced the most severe & chronic traumas also experienced them at the earliest ages. "If children are living in chaotic, traumatic environments when they are infants, then it is likely that they will continue to live in such environments as they grow older. All three of these aspects of trauma may be highly related in our society, and are probably not separable in either an analytic sense or a theoretical sense."

Their findings support that pathological dissociation is not a more severe version of normal dissociation. Pathological dissociation actually "represents an extreme deviation from normal development."

#dissociative identity disorder #dissociation #long post #academic #actuallydid #actuallydissociative #actuallytraumagenic #syscourse #research #trauma tw #sunflower posts