#Tw: Other possible tags (if you have any you wish me to add tell me and I will add those tags)

[bts5sosempire]

helloo(๑> <๑), can I ask app/website do you use to edit your fanfics, if it's okay with you? (I'm starting to write fanfics of my own and I couldn't find any app/website)

There are a lot, since I'm only using mobile version of the app(s) since it's more convenient for me to write on the get-go without bringing or opening my laptop all the time.

PureWriter (used to)

JotterPad (what I am currently using)

Grammarly Keyboard (what I am also currently using too)

Google Docs (used to)

Well, to start on PureWriter, I give it prolly a 7.5/10, I like the format and all, but the catalogs are a pain in the ass. Plus, you can't collapse a thread of your separate work, too, if you're writing for different stories. I hate trying to rearrange them in order so I kind of give up on that. It has a word reader to keep track of your word count and letters too. There are also constant updates on the app, so there are always new features being added, so I'm also not trying to keep up with that. I have the copy and paste thingy, as it double spaces my work and won't italicize or bold them correctly when needed.

For JotterPad, I give it an 8.5/10; it had its moment when I fought with it in the past. But there is an option for you to use the basic format, but you could also buy the add-ons if you wish. I may be biased, but I find it more convenient as you can link your account from Tumblr to JotterPad when transferring over whatever you're writing without the "copy and paste" type. Like PureWriter, it also had a word and character counter, so you can track how much you've written. It also gives you a statistics progress graph (like PureWriter, but in a different font, I guess). You can create folders (within another folder, again and again), which is a lifesaver, as I can separate my works into categories -> it almost works like a thread. I don't trust Tumblr enough to save in draft; the many times Tumblr ate my posts when I spend so many hours/days are agonizing.

Grammarly keyboard is a great way to use whatever app you use to write. Still, the hideous word recommendations are a thorn in the side at times when you're using an unfamiliar terminology or another synonymous that not the general audience knows. Like you fool, I'm trying to educate others and expand their vocabulary; let me do my sh*t. I say a solid 8/10, if for not the lagging it sometimes had. The app also had a desktop site, which I will not be talking about since I rarely use it. But if you do have your own words or terms, make sure to add them, or else this keyboard will auto-correct them for you.

Google docs, I'm sure I don't need to explain that here. No score.

But these are just my opinions, tho; you could try and see if they're to your liking or not; I'm sure there would be others who are willing to help you if they write a comment under the post or interact with you. Suppose I'm missing something or forgot to add.

Words of advice: block any porn bots on sight too, they could be liking and reblogging your stuff with a pfp of a hawt woman. So no hesitation. Also blank blogs.

Taggings: make sure to tag many things related to your content too. Thus, this will lead your content to be more exposed to others who like the stuff you put out that is related to their interest. You can check the "the tyrant" series I'm working on atm to see how the tagging(s) goes.

Taggings (tw): the "tw" stands for trigger warning, so if you happened to write any sensitive content that could potentially be in your series/ work, make sure to add them in your tagging if possible or add them at the very beginning of your list of content. Ex: tw frogs, tw cooties, or tw pink guy. If you don't put it, some people might stumble upon your work and unleash hell or politely tell you to edit and add tw to your work.

#writings #fanfic #fanfiction #writing #writing problems #fan fiction #anime #writing help #fanfic writing #I hope this helps

[novablaast]

under construction.

muse info, important information, and rules below.

quick info about the muse (tw for mentions of familial/child abuse + child injury):

this is a blog for the original greymon that taichi and hikari raised as children in the original adventure series + the digimon movie. her name is officially "koromon," koro for short.

in the events of the original encounter, koro had lost her memories of her original tamer until she was a greymon.

koro's original tamer was a young girl named lily, who was raised in an abusive household. the reason why koro grew so big as an agumon and greymon as opposed to taichi's greymon, was purely due to holding an inherent need to protect her tamer.

when living with lily, koro was kept secret and lived in an apartment with her as a koromon. she was to be seen as a stuffed animal.

however, as abuse grew worse, this triggered digivolution in koro, who eventually became greymon. however, due to living in an apartment, this caused the apartment building to collapse on itself due to being unable to support koro's weight. this resulted in her tamer and koro becoming severely injured, and thus, koro returned to the digital world as a digiegg (to be discovered by hikari and taichi later, with no memory of the incident until she once again became a greymon).

koro behaves much differently to taichi's agumon. she is territorial and aggressive, and viciously protective of those she loves. she is hardly upbeat, often succumbing to episodes of deep depression, grieving, and anger.

she also does not naturally digivolve into metalgreymon or wargreymon, due to the state of her tamer being unable to support digivolution. if she's able to digivolve at all (which is very rare) she becomes skulgreymon.

important info:

—» icon psd by @/fnsies. —» raw icons by @/digimon-icons —» icon borders made by me, do not use without permission.

—»Hiya! My name’s Rabbit (I also go by Bun/Bunny), I’m 21+ and a trans man (he/him only please).

—»I tag every possible trigger I can think of, just at the off-chance I can make someone uncomfortable. However, if I don’t tag something that triggers you, feel free to tell me and I’ll immediately change that. My tagging format is “#trigger /” —» On the topic of triggers, this blog will have heavy themes surrounding abuse, specifically child abuse and familial abuse, regarding koro's past. Please have these tags blacklisted if they are at risk of disturbing you.

—» no smut or ships are happening here obviously. koro is just some dragon.

—»I’m disabled and mentally ill. I can’t promise that I’ll always be in a good headspace for writing, I’ll always try to notify people if I’ll be offline due to mental illness complications. —»There are some fandoms I am deeply uncomfortable with, and I will not follow/rp with you if you rp characters from them. These fandoms are: undertale, killing stalking, snk, bnha, harry potter and hazbin hotel. I’ll add to this as if i am followed by any other fandoms that make me discomforted. —» It's very unfortunate that I have to put this here, but for the sake of new followers, I need you to be aware that I am currently in the process of being stalked by seemingly multiple people. If you wish to follow me, you need to be prepared that you will receive asks or messages about me, and if this will make your mental state worse, I understand if you don't want to follow. I really do.

rules:

—»This blog is private. If I do not follow you, I do not wish to rp. Don’t send me IC asks if you’re not a mutual, but anonymous can be utilised. —»Tag your alcohol mentions, drug mentions, age gap, incest, and abusive themes/references of any sort. Failure to tag on multiple occasions will get you unfollowed and possibly blocked. If you don’t know if something should be tagged, you are free to ask me or simply tag the post as “rabbit don’t look”.

—»If we follow each other, I’d like to interact! Mutuals that I don’t interact with at all will eventually be unfollowed, so if you want to interact with me, please don’t hesitate to do so. —»This blog is for adults only. No offense but I'm well into my adult years and it just feels strange for me to interact with people so young. —»Please do not follow me if you engage in minor/adult ships (including aged up minors). If you follow me and roleplay this, you will be blocked. —»Don’t follow me if you rp smut/suggestive situations with minor characters. This includes when they’re aged up.

#rules. #about. #abuse ment / #child injury ment /

[gaylittlewizardcat]

gaylittlewizardcat’s tag master post

The purpose of this post is to avoid duplicate tags (such as having both “Mister Mistoffelees” and “Mr. Mistoffelees” as tags) and to easier navigate my blog (both for others and myself). It will probably get updated a lot with time

This post also includes tags I think I may have use for in the future, even if I haven’t used them yet, and may exclude some other tags I have used for varying reasons

(This also applies to reblogs on my main)

Accessibility tags:

I do my best to tag triggering content, though the format varies a bit (such as using tw or cw, putting it before or after etc) if there’s ever a post you feel is triggering that doesn’t have proper warnings please don’t hesitate to tell me! Anons are on if that makes you more comfortable :]

Negativity: the tag I use when complaining about stuff. I try to keep my blog fun and light hearted so it’s nothing super upsetting, but if you don’t want that this is the tag to blacklist

Undescribed: I try to add image descriptions to all posts with gifs or images, but sometimes I don’t have time or aren’t sure how to describe something, in which case they get this tag so I can easily come back to it later. Things like bingos, “get to know my ship” templates or videos are never described because I simply do not know how to format them in a sensible way. If you use a screen reader and would like for me to add a description to a specific image let me know and I’ll try to prioritize that post! Anons are on if that makes you more comfortable

“Type of content” tags:

My art: art I made!

Doodle: silly very low effort art I made!

Writing: something I wrote or plan on writing, really pretty much anything writing related

Drabble: something small I wrote, usually also has the “writing” tag

Fanfiction: something I wrote I also posted on AO3, always also has the “writing” tag

Gif: this post includes gif(s) I’ve made

Gay little ramblings: me just spewing whatever nonsense is in my brain in the moment

Reblog: self explanatory

Excellent addition: when someone adds stuff to my post I think is neat, always also has the reblog tag

Fandom event: sometimes people do things like ship weeks or gift exchanges! Sometimes I participate!

Cats fanart: both my own and gift exchange stuff!

Incorrect cats: incorrect quotes

Source: my wretched brain: Incorrect quotes I’ve thought up myself

Jellicle queues: queue tag, rarely sees usage lol

Jellicle memes: memes

Jellicle polls: polls! I think they’re fun and I post them sometimes

Jellicle asks: invitations to send asks (such as ask games)

Jellicle answers: answered asks

Cosplay: Cosplay stuff, mostly added to this list symbolically since most posts tagged with this are gay little ramblings about WISHING I did cosplay but not actually doing it

Video: some type of content in video form, most likely edits of some kind

Audio: sometimes I edit audios, most of the time they also have the “video” tag because I upload them in a video format

Edit: a variety of stuff, but usually me doodling over a screenshot

Year in review: yearly tumblr check-in cause I love stats and organization

Discord shenanigans: Discord related shenanigans

Character tags and any possible specific tags that only concerns one character:

Alonzo cats

Amunet cats (I also tend to tag her with “Exotica cats” so people who like her have an easier time finding her, but I use the name Amunet otherwise)

Asparagus Jr

Bombalurina

Bustopher Jones

Cassandra cats

Coricopat

Demeter cats

Electra cats (Autistic Electra)

Etcetera cats (Autistic Cettie)

The Everlasting Cat

Jellicle dog George

Grizabella

Gus the theatre cat

Jellylorum

Jemima cats (Cryptid Jemmy)

Jennyanydots

Macavity

Mistoffelees (Cryptid Misto, Autistic Misto, Mute Misto, Misto and the Glitter Chronicles)

Mungojerrie (Trans Mungojerrie)

Munkustrap (Autistic Munkus)

Old Deuteronomy

Plato cats

Pouncival

Rum tum tugger

Rumpleteazer

Skimbleshanks

Tantomile

Tumblebrutus

Victoria the white cat (Deaf Vicky)

Relationship tags (these tags may or may not get used together with both/all relevant character tags, depending on the specific post):

Bombatuggoffelees

Bombatuggoffeleesandra (I am in rarepair hell)

Cassoffelees (platonic? romantic? qpr? Yes.)

Demecavity (Mostly past Demecavity)

Demelurina

Demestrap

Electcetera

Platoria

Tuggerlurina

Tuggoffelees

Victeazer

Monochromatic siblings (Mistoffelees and Victoria)

Monochromatic family (Mistoffelees, Victoria and Bustopher (occasionally Alonzo too but much less frequently))

Chaos twins (Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer)

Chaos trio (Mungojerrie, Rumpleteazer and Mistoffelees)

Mystic twins (Tantomile and Coricopat)

Mystic trio (Tantomile, Coricopat and Mistoffelees)

Deuteronomy brothers (Munkustrap and Rum Tum Tugger)

QPR Amulorum (queer-platonic relactionship between Amunet and Jellylorum)

Oldie squad (Jenny, Jelly, Amunet, Asparagus, Skimble, Bustopher, Gus and Ol’ Deut, on rare occasions also Griz)

The kittens (Electra, Etcetera, Jemima, Tumblebrutus, Pouncival, and sometimes Victoria)

Other tags:

Jellicle Cats

Pollicle Dogs

Cats OLC

Cats OBC

Timothy Scott (I usually don’t post about actors but I have a habit of not shutting up about Scoffelees)

Cats 1998

Cats international tour 2022

Cats non replica

I’m not going to mention all the different productions, I don’t keep great track of them so I just,,,, tag them only sometimes

Jellicle folklore (the Everlasting Cat as a deity and the beliefs Jellicles may hold regaring Her, and some stuff about how the magic in this world may work)

The man over there (sometimes the character himself, but mostly me complaining about people who hate on or fundamentally don’t understand the musical)

Human AU

Which Misto makeup design am I going to be Not Normal about today? (I am completely 100% biased but I think Mistoffelees has some of the most interesting makeup designs and they make me go just a little bit feral sometimes)

peak autism moment (when cats the musical,,,,, but autism <3)

#long post

[sasarahsunshine]

You want fluff?

Ok here’s fluff and smut:

Alpha Aaron comforting Omega Spencer because he’s self conscious about how he looks.

(This is another super old ask that’s been getting dusty in my inbox, so I figured it’s about time to dust it off and give it a proper answer that it deserves! Also all fluff, no smut sorry lol. Maybe I’ll do a follow-up! TW: body image issues, A/B/O, and hints at Aaron’s breeding kink lmao).

Spencer has always thought himself weak. Small. Too thin, his own mother pointed out often. Gangly and willowy, he heard Penelope say once. “Like a newborn foal,” Emily joked. Ungraceful, angular, boney.

He’s stared at himself in the mirror many mornings, trying to fix his hair, his clothes, his everything. His cheekbones made his cheeks look sunken in, his jaw was too sharp—like the rest of him. Hipbones and collarbone poking out. Clothes hung off him awkwardly, and he could never make his hair look like he wanted. Put hair products in it? No, that makes it look greasy and too straight. Too flat. It makes him look like a teachers assistant. Let it be natural and curly? No, then it looks messy and unwashed.

He hated how he looked. Weak and thin and not attractive in the slightest. Not a good choice for a mate. Not a good Omega. Good Omega’s had nice hips and strong arms for bearing pups, then being able to carry them.

Aaron deserved a good Omega. Not Spencer Reid. He’s not a good Omega. And he knows that as he watches other Omegas fawn over his Alpha. He sits still, hands wrapped tightly around his coffee cup, eyes locked on the two female Omega’s who are desperately vying for Aaron’s attention.

He’s expecting to see his Alpha take the bait. To see Aaron lean down and scent the females who are purposefully baring their necks, who are batting their eyes and spinning around to show off their assets. Beautiful bodies, wide hips, gorgeous features. They’ll make amazing mothers to his pups if he chose one or both.

(More under the cut)

Instead, he’s actually surprised to see his mate dismiss them both with a warning growl. One of them takes the hint and leaves with her metaphorical tail between her legs. The other presses herself against him, trying to wipe her scent on him, Spencer guesses, to entice him.

He’s expecting Aaron to accept her offer. She’s pushy and pretty. A good Omega.

But Aaron steps away and bares his fangs, one last warning for her to back off. Spencer can almost hear the snarl, even through the glass wall that separates him from his mate.

Finally the female takes the hint and makes a point to walk off as though he’s offender her, not the other way around.

Aaron walks straight into the conference room, closing the door behind him a little harder than necessary. Spencer flinches, watching his Alpha carefully. He can smell the frustration, the annoyance.

“Aaron?” His voice is soft as he tilts his head, releasing his own scent into the room.

Aaron visibly relaxes, the tension leaving his shoulders as his scent slowly goes back to normal, a small smile on his face. “Spencer,” he greets, walking over and wrapping his Omega up in his arms.

Which only confuses Spencer.

After a second, Aaron pulls away, brows knit together. “You’re tense. What’s wrong?”

Spencer purses his lips together, fingers tapping on the empty coffee cup he almost refuses to set down.

Aaron cups the Omega’s face between his hands, thumbs tracing over his cheekbones with care. “Omega,” he soothes, “tell me what’s on your mind.”

Spencer feels his lower lip wobble. “Those other Omegas,” he starts, pausing, hesitating.

Aaron sighs before kissing Spencer’s forehead, “I’m sorry, I tried to keep them from scenting me. I told them repeatedly that I wasn’t interested, that I was taken already. I had to snarl to get them to leave me alone. If you can smell them on me we should fix that as soon as possible,” he suggests, kissing his loves nose next, then going for his lips—but Spencer pulls away, leaving Aaron confused.

“Spencer?”

“Why are you with me?” Spencer asks, taking a step away to put distance between them, his hands now shaking as he tightens his grip on that damn coffee cup. “Why haven’t you picked a beautiful Omega to be yours? Why me? I’m not a good Omega, I won’t make good pups or, or, or be a good mother! I’m not attractive or pleasing to the eye or—“

He’s interrupted with strong arms wrapping around him, the scent of oak and spiced wine and a crackling fireplace enveloping his senses. He drops the cup and buries his face in his Alpha’s neck, inhaling that scent of warmth and safety. Of home.

“Oh, Spencer,” Aaron sighs, one hand going to the back of his loves head, his fingers threading through his hair. “I wish you could see yourself how I see you. I wish you could look in the mirror and see the most gorgeous Omega I’ve ever laid eyes on. I wish you could see you through my eyes,” he murmurs, placing a kiss on the top of Spencer’s head.

“I feel so lucky every day to have you,” he continues, feeling Spencer’s shoulders shaking a little. He tightens his hold on his Omega. “You’re so kind and thoughtful, selfless, intelligent. You’re sweet and silly. I love your rambles and your mind. I love your body. I love how you feel in my arms, how you feel under me or on top of me. I love being able to hold you. And I think you’d look absolutely beautiful if you were to be pregnant with my pups,” he adds quietly, whispering in his mate’s ear.

Spencer sniffles, tilting his head to glance at Aaron from the corner of his eye. “Really?”

“Yes, really,” Aaron confirms with a kiss to his temple. “God, I love you so much. I’m so lucky to have you as my Omega.”

Spencer doesn’t look convinced, his eyes still watering with unshed tears. He glances away. “You could have any Omega you want,” he tries to say, but Aaron cuts him off, “I can. And I want you.”

Spencer shakes his head, burying his face back into his Alpha’s coat, hiding his shame and embarrassment. “I shouldn’t be what you want,” he mumbles into the fabric.

Aaron sighs, his expression sad. He sits down and pulls his Omega with him, encouraging Spencer to pull his legs up, almost folding him in order for Aaron to hold him in his lap. He keeps his grip on Spencer tight, arms wrapped all the way around him, his nose pressed into Spencer’s temple as he breathes in the scent of sugar and honey and peaches. The scent of Spencer.

“My Omega,” he rumbles, soothing, “I love you so very much. I courted you for years, and in all that time I only had eyes for you. I still only have eyes for you. I refuse to look at any other Omega when I have my soulmate in my arms.”

Spencer looks at Aaron, shocked. “Soulmate?”

“Yes, that’s the only way I can explain it. I can’t imagine my life without you. I want my future with you and you alone, my Omega. My Spencer. I want you to have my pups,” he drops his voice, nosing down to Spencer’s neck, “I want to raise them alongside you. I want have a home full of laughter and little feet.” He kisses the skin bared to him, right near the mark that he left on his mate during their first shared heat and rut.

Spencer whimpers, a few tears finally racing down his face.

“I want to watch you teach our pups everything you know. I want to see your bright hazel eyes in them. I want them to have your curly hair and your adorable nose. I want to watch them grow and learn and dance with you as their mother. And I want to lay in our nest every singe night with you in my arms.”

Spencer sniffles, smiling just a little. “Really?”

Aaron kisses the mark that claims Spencer as his, then up his jaw, his cheek, and finally his lips, slotting them together like pieces of a puzzle, perfect for each other.

“Really,” he breathes, their lips gliding together as he speaks. He can taste his love’s tears and uses a hand to wipe them away, kissing Spencer again. “Only you. The most beautiful Omega I’ve ever laid eyes on. I only want you.”

Spencer’s smile grows until he lets out a soft laugh, kissing his Alpha back. How can he argue when his Alpha sounds so sure, so confident in his love and attraction for him?

He pulls away a little, wiping at his own eyes with the back of his hand. “Okay. Okay, I believe you. I love you.”

Aaron smiles and kisses his nose, “Good. I love you too.”

————

Tagging: @bau-gremlin @ris-criminal-mind @tobias-hankel @ssa-noa @foxtrot91 @dumpsiteforfics @kuolonsyoja @multixfandomwriter @marvel-ous-m @thaddeusly @spencers-renaissance @reidology @physics-magic @brillianthijinx

Let me know if you want to be tagged in future A/B/O posts!!

#tw a/b/o #tw body image issues #tw self hatred #tw body image #hotchreid a/b/o #a/b/o #alpha hotch #omega reid #tw mpreg #<- suggested #hotchreid #criminal minds #spencer reid #aaron hotchner #criminal minds fandom #criminal minds au #sarah replies #ask #anon #criminal minds omegaverse #omegaverse

[spencers-renaissance]

Hunger

Summary: Spencer really likes his new coworkers: they're nice, welcoming, friendly, and made his transition to the BAU as easy as possible. Which makes it impossible for him to turn down an invitation to eat dinner with them at an upscale fancy restaurant, no matter how anxious that makes a boy who grew up with next to nothing feel.

Tags: insecurity, anxiety, allusions to poverty, hurt/comfort, team as family, angst with a happy ending, fluff, background jelle

TW: mentions of poverty, financial difficulties, and food insecurity

Pairing: Gen (Aaron Hotchner & Spencer Reid, Derek Morgan & Spencer Reid)

Word Count: 3k

Masterlist // Read on AO3 // Bad Things Happen Bingo

This fills my "trying not to cry" bad things happen bingo square and is set a few weeks after Spencer joins the BAU, in an AU in which Elle was there before him.

Everyone is so nice, is the thing.

And that’s great. Really, it is. Spencer isn’t about to complain when JJ kindly walks him through the filing system all the while asking questions about him and his life, or when Derek ribs him gently about his ducktail hair or his nerdy brain. No-one cuts him off when he gets carried away — unless it’s time-sensitive, of course — or teases him about anything that cuts too close to home. Being the new guy in the most prestigious unit in the FBI could’ve been a nightmare, but this team made it easy. He’s so grateful for all of it.

It just makes it really hard to turn down dinner invitations.

He watches his shaking fingers in the mirror as they button his shirt up and wrap his tie around his neck, poking it fastidiously under the collar, not a wrinkle of fabric out of place. He glances down at the countertop again, re-reading the restaurant name copied down in JJ’s careful handwriting onto a piece of copier paper regardless of having committed it to memory the first time he heard it. Sur la Rivière: a fancy European restaurant in DC.

He’d hoped for a cheap and cheerful Chinese when Hotch had first brought up the idea of a team bonding dinner, something more his style, but he’d smiled anyway when Elle had mentioned this place her foodie friend had recommended, no matter how strained it might have been. He’s the new guy after all. He doesn’t expect much swing when it comes to choosing where to eat.

As soon as his shirt and tie are perfectly in place, he gets to work on taming his curly hair. It makes him look younger when it’s loose and fluffy, and with a baby-face like his combined with already being the youngest person in the entire FBI, every year he can add on counts. Soon, though, there’s no more grooming he can use to stall the inevitable, and he sighs tiredly before clicking off the bathroom light and heading to the hall.

He collects his phone and wallet, checking for the sixth time that evening that his credit card and extra money to tip the waiter is definitely in there, grabs his keys, and heads out of his apartment. Derek is in his car waiting on the curb for him like he promised he would be, looking effortlessly suave and cool in a way Spencer never will as he honks his horn at the sight of the younger man walking towards him.

“Pretty boy!” he calls, his grin making Spencer smile, too. “Took you long enough. Hop in, fancy European cuisine awaits.”

Another rush of nerves floods Spencer’s stomach at the mention of the fate he’s signed up for, but he smiles anyway as he opens the passenger door and slides in. “Thanks for giving me a lift, Derek,” he says, hating that his anxious discomfort is so obvious in his voice.

Thankfully, Derek doesn’t pick him up on it, simply pulling away from the curb and beginning the drive across town. “How many times do I have to tell you not to mention it? I live less than ten minutes away, Spencer, it’s really not a problem.”

Spencer flushes a bit at that, wringing his hands in his lap as he watches the streets of his district pass by out the window. “Well, I appreciate it anyway,” he settles on, flashing Derek a quick smile that he doubts he sees anyway with his eyes glued so firmly to the road. “Riding the metro is a nightmare at this hour.”

“Never learned how to drive? I didn’t have the money for lessons, Spencer wants to say, irrationally frustrated at his situation. I was rushed through the academy too quickly to learn something as trivial as driving.

“I was too busy getting five degrees,” Spencer says instead, forcing a smile on his face. He wishes he wasn’t so well-practiced at managing other people’s emotions; wishes he could say what he’s really thinking. But he can’t, not in front of the people he’s trying to impress, not so soon.

“Alright, alright, I get it, you’re a genius,” Derek chuckles. “I’m glad you’re coming tonight, we all are. Gideon didn’t tell us much before he left, just that you had an IQ of 187 and he’d pulled a lot of strings to get you in at only 22.”

Spencer winces slightly at the mention of his ex-mentor. “Yeah, I’m sorry he ran out on you guys so suddenly.”

“Hey, from what I hear, he did the same to you,” Derek counters. “You guys seemed way closer than we were anyway. I never really liked the guy.”

As much as most of Spencer hates Gideon for abandoning him without warning, leaving him to find his footing in the FBI alone and afraid, a small part of him still itches to defend him. “He was a good mentor. Not such a good friend, as it turns out.”

Derek looks away from the road for a moment and shoots him a sympathetic look. “I’m sorry, man. But Gideon’s loss is our gain. You’re gonna be an amazing asset to the team, I just know it.”

A genuine smile crosses Spencer’s face at that. “Thanks, Derek. I can’t wait to really get stuck in, you know?”

“I remember the feeling.” Derek grins again.

They continue chatting for the rest of the journey, Spencer finally relaxing into the company of a new friend— that is, until Derek cuts across one of his stories from his second PhD. “Hey, the restaurant should be up on the left somewhere but I can’t see it…

“Oh, there,” Spencer says, pointing at the sleek, almost anonymous-looking black sign hanging above a set of fancy doors. How can doors be fancy? They’re supposed to be functional, not pretentious. All of a sudden that sinking feeling that had lifted on the car ride over settles back into his stomach and he can’t help but swallow nervously as Derek parks the car and they step out into the street.

Everyone’s already seated when they finally push through the restaurant doors, and Spencer hates that he made them both late with his apprehensive stalling, but no-one really seems to mind as they all cheer happily at the sight of them, ignoring the dirty looks it earns them from the other patrons.

“You made it!” Penelope squeals as she gets up from her seat to give Spencer a hug. He’s a little touch-averse, really, but something about Penelope’s hugs make him never want to leave her arms. He does anyway, though, and he and Derek find their seats opposite one another at the end of the table.

“I’m glad you’re here, Spencer,” Hotch says kindly as the waitress passes the two late-comers their menus.

“You’ll fit right in,” JJ promises, “we’re like a weird little family, to be honest.”

Spencer flushes a bit under the attention of so many experienced FBI agents, but he nods anyway before they all get started on deciding what to eat. He listens vaguely to everyone talking amongst themselves, giving one another suggestions in a way that corroborates JJ’s statement, and all of a sudden Spencer’s collar feels tight. It’s not just the nerves of meeting new people or the anxiety of an alien social environment, he realises he doesn’t recognise a single item on the menu.

He knows what the words themselves mean, but reading the words 'tortellini of venison’ and trying to imagine deer meat pasta is not easily done. The only simple meals seem to be seafood and Spencer’s never been a fan of fish. The only food he can even begin to imagine himself actually putting in his mouth, chewing, and swallowing is the porterhouse steak: not that he’s ever really eaten much red meat like that.

Spencer isn’t a fussy eater. He’s eaten a wide variety of dishes from any number of different restaurants across multiple cuisines, he’s just never had the kind of money to eat at a place that serves caviar, for God’s sake. Far too soon, the waitress wanders back over to the table, taking everyone’s orders with a polite smile on her face.

He listens as everyone confidently orders their meals: the smoked trout, the Moroccan quail, the lobster tagliatelle. Spencer thanks the heavens he isn’t a vegetarian, at least, but it’s not much of a consolation prize when everyone’s eyes fall on him.

“Uh, I’ll have the porterhouse steak,” he says uncertainly, hoping nobody notices the sweat beading on his forehead or the anxiety raging behind his eyes.

Everyone seems to accept his answer, the waitress taking their menus and walking back towards the kitchen as the rest of them resume their conversation. Hotch’s eyes linger a moment too long on him, and Spencer thinks he sees something like concern in his gaze, but before he can think much of it, Penelope’s drawing everyone’s attention to JJ’s bracelet.

“Can we please appreciate this?” she says, sounding scandalised for some reason Spencer can’t quite discern from context yet. “Elle, baby, you have taste. This is absolutely gorgeous! Are you sure you don’t want to date me, too?”

Spencer’s eyebrows raise slightly at that. “Oh, you two are together?” he asks, although now that he realises it he’s not sure how he didn’t notice sooner.

“Are you sure you’re a profiler, kid?” Derek laughs. “They don’t exactly hide it.

“Even though they’re supposed to,” Hotch chimes in with a faux stern look. “You two are gonna have my job at some point.” “Aw, but where would we find another Unit Chief that would help us hide our secret so well?” Elle says charmingly, making everyone laugh, including JJ, who presses her face into her shoulder fondly.

It’s easy for Spencer to momentarily lose himself in the banter, smiling as they tease one another, interspersing their gripes and funny stories from work among it all. They include him in all of it, and he doesn’t feel left out for even a second, finally relaxing into the unfamiliar environment of a fancy restaurant, eased by the reassuring company of his new team.

“JJ’s right,” he muses out loud when there’s a brief lull in conversation, “you guys really are like a little family.”

JJ leans away from Elle towards him for a moment, wrapping him in a side hug. “And you’re the perfect addition to it, Spence,” she says softly, everyone’s expressions reading nothing but fond agreement. “We needed a little brother to add into the mix.”

Spencer blushes again but leans into her touch.

No-one gets a chance to say anything else before the food arrives, the servers bringing JJ and Elle’s meals first, then serving Hotch and Penelope, before they finally bring out his and Derek’s order.

Everyone dives into their food, immediately making noises of contentment, passing bites around to one another, but Spencer can’t join in the jubilant celebration of a good meal. He picks his knife and fork up shakily as he stares at the massive portion of steak in front of him. It’s served with roast potatoes and flecks of a pointless salad that he suspects is only there as a garnish rather than actually part of the meal, but that’s not what has him worried.

This huge slab of meat hasn’t been sliced beforehand. He knows that he’ll shake the whole table if he tries to do it: it’s a massive, impenetrable slab of red meat that Spencer has no chance of enjoying, let alone finishing. He stares at it as tears burn in his eyes: he’s so out of his comfort zone and he’s so terrified of messing up and pushing away these newfound friends that he can’t move.

“Spence?” JJ cuts in gently, putting a hand on his shoulder, forcing him to look up, only to find everyone looking at him with worried expressions on their faces. “Are you okay?”

“Sorry,” he says, standing up abruptly, the disturbance of the table barely registering in his brain. “I just need a minute.”

He rushes out of the restaurant without looking back, drawing in deep breaths as soon as he’s in the cool evening air of spring. Thoughts race through his mind at a million miles an hour as he grasps for something concrete to grab onto, eventually settling for a tall flower pot.

“Spencer?”

He looks up to find Hotch standing next to him, deep concern written across his face, and Spencer’s heart clenches at the thought that he’s already messed this up so quickly. Could this night possibly get any worse?

Apparently, it can, because all of a sudden he feels his face crumple and the stinging tears finally spill down his cheeks. He sinks down to the ground and buries his face in his hands, humiliation glimmering in every cell of his body.

“Oh, Spencer,” Hotch says gently, lowering himself to the cool pavement next to him and placing a warm hand on his back. He lets him cry it out for a couple of minutes, his palm drawing small circles in between his shoulder blades, trying again to get through to him when Spencer’s sobs calm down slightly. “You want to tell me what’s going on?”

With a shuddering breath, he forces himself to lift his face from his palms, although he still refuses to meet Hotch’s eyes, keeping his gaze fixed firmly on the Korean restaurant across the street. “I guess it just all got to be too much,” he whispers.

“Yeah?” Hotch says encouragingly. “What specifically?”

“I— I didn’t have much growing up. It was just me and my mom so we were living in the middle of Vegas on a single disability check each month. And, uh, then I went to college, and I was barely scraping by there, too. It’s only recently that I’ve known the luxury of knowing for sure I was eating that night, and it still gets to me sometimes when I’m faced with fancy restaurants and heavy, expensive meals. My body’s had to work for years on virtually nothing, there’s no way I can stomach a steak like that. I guess, all those feelings that are a lifetime in the making combined with the anxiety of eating with the team for the first time… wanting to make a good impression, it just all got too much. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to—”

Hotch raises a hand, and Spencer finally meets his eyes, finding nothing but compassion and understanding there no matter how much he searches. “You don’t need to apologise, Spencer, not for something like this. I’m sorry that none of us thought to make the first team dinner with you a more casual affair, and I’m even more sorry that you felt like you couldn’t tell us you were uncomfortable.” “It’s okay.”

“It’s not, but I’m glad you accept my apology,” Hotch says, smiling softly. “You know, we all bring baggage with us, Spencer. I can’t relate to food insecurity, but I had my own issues when I first joined the BAU. I grew up with a pretty terrible father, and the thing I found myself reprimanded for the most when I was a new recruit was the inability to follow orders. I’d spent my whole life scared of this man, obeying his every word, and I couldn’t help but hear him when my superiors would tell me to do something. When I was finally free of him, it was like I couldn’t help but rebel.

“You’re not the only one whose childhood follows them around, and I’d much rather it be something like this that we can easily manage, than something that will affect you or the team in the field, okay? Instead of beating yourself up over things you can’t control, try and remember that you have a whole new family who will do anything they can to make you feel as comfortable as possible. We already think the world of you, Spencer. Sacrificing fancy dinners that — let’s face it — can’t beat cheap junk food anyway is hardly a big ask.

Warmth spreads across his chest at Hotch’s words, replacing the feelings of failure and rising anxiety with something that feels like a promise of all the good to come. There’s something fatherly, something deeply paternal in Hotch that there wasn’t in Gideon, and it’s the most comfort Spencer’s felt in years. “Really?”

“Really,” Hotch nods, squeezing his shoulder gently. “You wait here one minute, okay?”

“Okay…” Hotch is gone before he can finish replying, and Spencer is left staring at the doors confused, until the rest of the team are piling out of them a few minutes later, Hotch bringing up the rear with his jacket and wallet in hand.

“We just paid the tab. How does cheap Chinese food eaten in the park a couple hundred yards down sound?” Hotch suggests, raising an eyebrow as he smiles warmly at Spencer.

He looks around briefly at the rest of the team, who are all giving him encouraging looks, not a trace of judgement or annoyance to be found.

“That sounds amazing,” he laughs wetly, the tears springing to his eyes this time caused by a completely different emotion. “I can pay you back, though.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, pretty boy,” Derek says, patting Spencer’s back, “we’ve got it. Now, come on, I’m gonna order sweet and sour chicken balls, and I want them now.”

“That’s what she said,” Penelope giggles, linking her arm with Derek’s.

“That was terrible, baby girl, but I love that you tried.”

“Do you want to share shrimp chop suey with me, babe?” Elle asks JJ as they clasp hands, walking a couple of steps ahead of them.

“Well, I’m certainly not sharing with any of these losers,” JJ teases, before kissing Elle’s cheek.

Spencer feels Hotch place his hand on his back, and he turns to smile gratefully at the older man. “Thank you,” he says quietly, trying to convey just how earnestly he means it. “No-one’s ever done anything this nice for me before.”

There’s a slightly sad tinge to Hotch’s smile, but it doesn’t look like pity. “I’d get used to it if I were you. That’s just how we do things in the BAU.”

Well, if that’s the case, Spencer thinks, smiling as he falls into step between Hotch and Penelope, I think I might just stick around.

taglist: @criminalmindsvibez @suburban--gothic @strippersenseii @takeyourleap-of-faith @negativefouriq @makaylajadewrites @iamrenstark @hotchseyebrows @temily @jellejareau @reidology @spencerspecifics @bau-gremlin @tobias-hankel @garcias-bitch @oliverbrnch @physics-magic @sbeno22 @im-autistic-not-stupid(taglist form)

#criminal minds #cm #criminal minds fic #criminal minds writing #criminal minds gen #criminal minds gen fic #aaron hotchner & spencer reid #derek morgan & spencer reid #derek morgan #spencer reid #aaron hotchner #penelope garcia #jelle #jennifer jareau #elle greenaway #criminal minds fluff #criminal minds angst #hurt spencer reid #hurt/comfort

[bxccxdxll]

Strong Arms, Blue Eyes

Summary: You and Bucky had always been wary of each other. But can two broken people really stay apart when it's clear that they are each other’s missing piece?

Pairing(s): Bucky x Reader

TW: Depression (you know what they say, write what you know!)

Word count: 1346 

A/N: I wrote this at 3am after @believeitseeitdoit tagged me in six sentence saturday so you can thank her for giving me the courage to actually post something I’ve written!

You knew when you met him that he would be the end of you. Those icy blue eyes and thick, strong arms just made you want to collapse into his chest and let him hold you tight in his arms. It had been weeks, no months since you had been held. The pain in your heart weighed heavy and kept you from reaching out for a hand to pull you up before you drowned in your own self hatred and doubt and the horrible memories of your fucked up past.

You had joined the avengers after Natasha caught wind of the work you had been doing. Hacking into hydra bases and leaving bugs to corrupt all the locking mechanisms and send a ping to the avengers so they could see which bases would have easy access. You did all this anonymously. You weren’t doing it for fame or fortune. Just to expose the organization that had destroyed your life from the minute you were brought into this world.

Bucky was wary of you the moment Natasha had told them all about you. You were an unknown, a variable that could destroy everything if he wasn’t careful enough. So when you first arrived he watched you. Any time you entered the same room as him, you could feel his eyes burning a hole into your back. You had considered confronting him but thought better of it when you remembered who he was. And it wasn’t just Bucky who was cautious. Hydra had destroyed your whole world.

The avengers didn’t know that and they didn’t need to in your mind. But Bucky was hydra. He was with them when they took everything away from you and you couldn’t get the idea that he might take the last bit that was left away from you too. But he had this air about him. He always looked calm from the outside but that meant nothing. This man knew how to hide his emotions, keep his face one of stone while there was a war going on in his mind. And you could feel it. For some reason. He gave off a nervousness that you couldn’t quite place. It pulled you towards him even though you just wanted to hate him. Made you seek him out when you entered a room. Listen for his screams in the night when you were both plagued by nightmares. It was tearing you in two. The need for him and the hate for him. 

You walked into the common room and looked around, locking eyes with those piercing blue ones. It was the same every time, you’d walk in and find Bucky staring into your soul. You quickly looked away and continued to your usual spot, the cushion in the bay window that Bucky had made Tony add after seeing you curled up against the window listening to music and sleeping. You had looked so peaceful but uncomfortable and for some reason Bucky needed to fix that. He had this desire to see you happy and make those adorable frown lines fade. 

Bucky could never understand why he was feeling this way about you. You were a mystery. Bucky was pulled to you but he knew nothing about you and it terrified him. He knew that you had been helping them take down Hydra from behind the scenes, but how could he be sure you weren’t going to turn your back on them and take everything you had stolen from Hydra to use for yourself. But every time that thought popped into Bucky’s head, a little part of him would scream at him for even considering the possibility that Y/N was like that. He had seen how you were with everyone on the team. Helping wherever you could and trying to make everyone happy when Bucky could see how much pain was shining through your eyes. And the way you were with the children and animals that you would see in the park on your daily walks (not that Bucky was watching you or anything like that) made Bucky’s heart happy and his eyes smile.

Today something was different. You didn’t have your usual headphones or new novel with you when you walked in. He locked eyes with you and could see the exhaustion written across your face. You hadn’t been sleeping lately and he knew it. He could hear your screams in the night like he knew you could hear his, and it haunted him. He wished he could work up the nerves to go to you and soothe you. Bring you back from the nightmares that plagued your dreams. But Bucky knew you were scared of him, could see it in the way your shoulders tensed when he got near, the way your heart rate picked up whenever he entered the room. 

He watched you walk over to your usual seat and drop your body like you had the weight of the world weighing you down. You curled right up into a tiny ball, trying to put as much of yourself into the small space as possible to escape the world. With your forehead pressed against the cool glass of the window, you finally let the tears fall. You didn’t care that Bucky was sitting on the couch just behind you and probably heard every hitch in your breath from the newest wave of tears. You just needed to let it out and this was your safe place. Leaned against the bookshelf with your cheek pressed to the window. Letting the cold seep into your skin and force your body just to relax. The cushion beneath you and the blanket held around your frame gave you the little semblance of comfort that you needed. Shielding you from the cruel outside world.

Bucky couldn’t stand it. He could hear your quiet sobs and smell the tears he could only imagine were streaming down your face. He had to do something about it. Had to try to give you whatever he could to make you feel better. Pull you out of your misery. 

You were too caught up in your rampaging thoughts that you didn’t even notice he had moved till you felt weight land on the edge of your cushion just by your feet. You looked up and saw icy blue staring back at you. A sadness in his eyes that you hadn’t seen before. One not for himself but for you. He reached up his hand and you flinched as it came towards your face. Staring into your eyes he asked, “may I?” You nodded hesitantly back at him, wondering what he was going to do. Bucky reached the rest of the way and brushed your hair out of your face before he rested his palm against your cheek. You leaned into his touch, seeking the warmth and softness you knew he could offer. 

Bucky stared at you amazed, with a slight smile. Happy that you were finally letting him near you and maybe weren’t as afraid of him as he thought. You close your eyes and turn your face into his palm. Pressing your lips into the center and letting out a breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding. 

Afraid to ruin the moment, Bucky let you do as you pleased and just looked. Watching as the tension slowly released for your shoulders. Eventually you opened your eyes and looked up at Bucky. His gaze was so warm and intense that you let out a little whimper before leaning forward. Bucky opened his arms and you collapsed into his chest. Sobs racked your body as you let it all out. All the pain, and fear, and anger that you felt. You just cried into the arms of this warm soft man and let him hush you and hold you and tell you it would all be okay. And he let you. Maybe Bucky wasn’t as bad as you thought he was. Now he was just the man with strong arms, blue eyes, and the kindest heart even after years of torment.

#first fic dont judge #bucky x reader #bucky barnes #sebastian stan

[heloisedaphnebrightmore]

How to grow your blog - For Beginners!

Since I receive quite a few messages about how I grew my blog and how others could improve theirs, I decided to do this post to help you with whatever knowledge I gathered throughout my time on here.

Disclaimer: These are only my personal observations, there's no proven success if used and they may differ in other people's case.

Things I will discuss below will include;

Interactions

Masterlists / Navigations

Tags

Taglists

Simplicity

So, I guess it's time for us to begin :)

Interactions

First and foremost, interactions are the most important elements of Tumblr. These can include asks/ comments/ reblogs/ reblogs with comments and any sort of interactions with other blogs.

Asks are important because while you're having fun and chatting away with people, your name shows up on their blog and their followers might be intrigued by your user name or what you said and they check out your blog.

Comments. When you read a fic or see a beautiful edit and leave a comment on that certain post, most of the time the creator will check out your profile and other people who leave comments might find you sweet and head to your blog as well. It's nothing deep with an underlying meaning. It's simple curiosity. If what you write is kind or relatable, people feel drawn to you.

Reblogs. Reblogs are one of the most important part of Tumblr. That's the only way your art can be spread. Sure, tags are important and helpful, but reblogs are the ones that keep your art alive. When you reblog a post you're essentially sharing someone else's content with 10, 100 or 1000 people without your knowledge.

Reblogs with comments are possibly the most important and significant part of this site. You don't just share someone else's art, you also add your positive comment to it, which draws people's attention. When you reblog someone else's art, they might check out your blog and they might reblog yours. Of course, it's not a rule nor should it be expected, but from my personal experiences, I have gained loads of followers through my mutuals. Their kind words and love for my fics have drawn quite a large traffic to my blog and vice versa.

Masterlists / Navigations

Many people will tell you that tags are enough and you don't need a Masterlist. I disagree. Whilst tags are good and useful, tumblr's tags aren't reliable and on top of that people can be quite lazy. The easiest way to showcase your art - whether it be fanfiction, fanart, gifs, drawings, video edits and such - is to basically offer them to your visitors/followers on a silver platter. It can be a bother at times, always keeping it up to date, but when people have to search for your content they get discouraged because let's be honest, we like things that are easily accessible.

Masterlists can be a single Tumblr post or a Google drive document where you add the link of your creations. In my Masterlist you can find different characters, organised by different fandoms. If you use Google drive make the document readable [but not editable] for the public.

Some people, such as myself, create Navigation posts, where they add relevant sub menus which help their followers navigate easier on their blogs. These can contain where to send "asks", "rules" that the owner of the blog might set, "blog recommendations", "side blogs", "about me" menus and the like.

Tags

Although I mentioned that tags can be unreliable, they're still a necessity. Search for relevant tags and use them when you post your art. Meanwhile reblogging is the easiest way to get your creations out there, people do regularly search for tags when they wish to see something and the only way they will find you is if your post appears in tags.

If you're not sure whether your tags are working, you can always head to your dashboard, click on the 👤 in the right upper corner, go down to the posts menu and look for the post you want to check on. Once you found it, click on the tag that you would like to search for. If it shows up in the recent tab of the search results, it means the tag is working, but if after 5 minutes of posting it's still not there, you might need to reupload your work. Unfortunately Tumblr has some issues with the tags and it takes two or even three attempts at times to upload something correctly, whilst other times it might work immediately.

On a side note, if you reblog nsfw content or triggering content, you might want to tag those appropriately. Tw food, tw blood, tw. etc. Depends on the content of the triggering post.

You can also create your own tags. Such as "XY's inbox" for your asks or "XY shares" for anything that you reblog from others. This way people can block those tags and see only those posts on your blog that they might find interesting.

Taglists

Taglists aren't a necessity, especially because there are many different ways to notify your followers of new creations, but it's certainly useful. The reason I think taglists are important is because tumblr won't always show your posts on everyone's dashboard, especially if they follow loads of people. However, when you use a taglist, and mention people on your newest posts, they will be able to get a notification of your update.

Of course, if you feel like tagging people might be bothersome, you might create a side-blog where you reblog your posts and people can turn on notifications to be notified of your updates. This option has been rather popular recently, because usually we reblog and post many things on our main blogs and people don't want to get notified about every trivial post, so a side-blog with the most important posts might just be it for you.

Simplicity

This might be confusing so let me be less vague. As I said, we can be rather lazy and that doesn't mean we're bad people, we might just had a difficult day or too much to study or work and we just want easy access to content. Being simple is a necessity. Though it's good to be creative and unique, such as creating a Masterlist that's called "Where the stars shine", it's not obvious for many what is hidden behind those words and they might not be curious enough to check it out. By being simple and obvious, as I said before, you're offering your content on a silver platter. Simple and neat. Sometimes people just need things to be easy to find.

I have been told many times before that my blog is very organised and I feel very proud about that because it means people can find things easily. Of course, it's not proven, but I think that could be a factor in growing your blog. But as I've said, these are only my personal observations.

I hope this helps. Have a nice day :) Heloise Daphne Brightmore

#writing #content creation #writing advice #creator advice #blogging tips #blog writing #content writing #heloise rambles #grow your blog

[full-of-roman-angst-trash]

I'll Never Forget

Word count: 1248

Pairings: Familial creativity twins (Please don't tag this as R*mR*m, that ship makes me extremely uncomfortable.)

TW: Somewhat unsympathetic sides (Not including Remus and Roman). Please tell me if I need to tag anything or add any warnings.

Remus wakes up at around 9:30 in the morning to his arm going off. He usually doesn't wake up this early as he isn't exactly a morning person. But today it's his birthday! He wants to appreciate it as early as he possibly can. 

So he quickly gets up, gets dressed, and skips out of his room. 

When he first became a Darkside, he never looked forward to his birthday. None of the lightsides ever wished him a happy birthday. The only ones who did were Janus and Virgil. At that time though, he didn’t appreciate it since he saw how the lightsides celebrated their birthdays. More specifically, Roman's. Roman always got the most dramatic birthdays and gifts. It would fill Remus with jealousy. 

He only started appreciating the small gifts and parties that Janus and Virgil gave him after Virgil left them. Now every year, he looks forward to it. He looks forward to seeing Janus put his best efforts forward to make his birthday as great as possible. He looks forward to the small cake Janus makes for the two of them. He looks forward to opening his gift and seeing how much thought Janus put into getting him something he loves and enjoys. 

He gets to the kitchen and is hit with a wave of disappointment. Usually Janus will decorate the kitchen with things like fake blood, fake eyeballs, fake guts, creepy dolls, and more. But this time, it's empty and plain. Just like a normal day. 

He takes a deep breath and decides that Janus is probably just still asleep. After all, the two of them went to bed quite late. He makes himself some toast. He quickly finishes and starts walking to Janus's room to go and wake him up. 

He busts into the room, "WAKE UP SNAKE DADDY! IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!"

He frowns when he sees the room empty and looks around, "Janus?" 

When he doesn't see Janus anywhere he walks out and starts searching the rest of the darkside. 

He looks everywhere but doesn't find him. At this point, he's worried. He starts to panic and runs to the Lightside. That's the last place he can think of looking. 

When he gets there he starts running to the living room. He knows he isn't really allowed or wanted here, but he doesn't care. He has to find Janus. He's okay with getting in trouble with the other sides if it means that he'll know where his best friend is. 

As he starts getting closer to the living room, he starts hearing talking. At first, he doesn't really think much of it, but then he hears a certain laugh. He looks around the corner and sees Janus sitting with Logan, Patton, and even Virgil. They're talking and joking around. 

If it had been any other day, Remus would have been happy for Janus. He would have been glad to see his best friend being accepted by the other sides and reconnecting with Virgil. But, today he just can't seem to feel that joy for his friend. Janus seemed to have completely forgotten his birthday. For the first time in all his years of being created, Janus forgot. 

Remus doesn't know how long he stands there just staring, but he is suddenly snapped out of his thoughts by screaming directed towards him. 

"Remus?! What are you doing here?!" Virgil is the first to notice him. 

The other three sides look over at him

Remus puts on his usual persona and smirks, "I was looking for double d."

Patton frowns at the nickname, "Remus, that's inappropriate. His name is Janus."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Remus says with an eye roll.

Janus sighs, "What do you need, Rem?"

The question shatters Remus's heart and makes him drop his persona. 

"What do you mean? D-Don't you know what day it is?" 

"It's Friday, why?" Janus says with a confused expression.

Remus frowns and holds back tears. He turns to Virgil and desperately says, "You know what day it is right Virgin?!”

He had to know! Virgil used to celebrate his birthday with them until not that long ago. There's no way he forgot that quickly. 

"Don't call me that," Virgil says with a clear annoyance in his tone, "And it is Friday. June 25th." 

"Y-you two are joking, right?" At this point, Remus starts tearing up.

Logan, "It is June 25th and it is a Friday. Why would they joke about a date?"

Remus starts crying, making Janus frown in concern. 

He stands up and starts walking over to him, "Remus, what's wrong?"

Remus takes a step back and shakes his head, unable to force out words.

Janus stops in his tracks and frowns more, "Please, Rem…"

Suddenly Remus feels somebody pull him into a hug.

"I'm disappointed in you, Janus."

It was Roman. 

Remus hugs his twin back and cries into his chest.

"What? I didn't do anything!" Janus quickly defends himself. 

Roman sighs and stops himself from yelling at the snake side. "Today is Remus's birthday. If anyone should know that, it should be you. Now, we're leaving."

Before Janus can respond, Roman sinks down to his room with Remus. He sits them down on his bed and holds Remus close. 

"Shhh, it's okay, Rem. Let it out. I've got you."

Remus clings to him and continues letting all his emotions turn to tears. 

After a while, Remus stops crying and calms down. 

"Rem?" Roman speaks softly.

Remus responds with a quiet hum.

"How are you feeling? Do you need some water or anything?"

Remus pulls away from the hug and rubs one of his eyes, "I feel fine I guess… A bit drained but I do feel better after letting all of it out. Some water would be nice though.” 

Roman nods and summons some water, handing it to him, "There you go. I'm glad you feel a bit better."

Remus takes the water and starts drinking it. A few minutes pass before Remus speaks again, "Thank you. For everything. I really appreciate it.”

Roman smiles, "Of course. I know I haven't exactly been a great brother to you in the past, but I wanna change that. So, I'm sorry for all the years that I've ignored you or been mean to you. Can you please give me a chance to be better?"

Remus is shocked. He wasn't expecting that. He and Roman have had a rough relationship and they really don't know each other that well. But what he does know is that Roman isn't exactly one to admit when he is wrong so easily.

"I accept your apology. And yeah, I'll give you another chance."

Roman smiles more and hugs Remus again, "Thank you!"

Remus hugs him back and nods, "No problem."

"Now!" Roman pulls away from the hug and in a cheerful voice says, "Let's celebrate your birthday, yeah?" 

Remus chuckles, "Yeah."

The two of them spend the rest of the day playing games, teasing one another, and watching a few movies. 

At around 8:30, the two of them are sitting down on the couch in the Darkside eating a cake they made together while watching a movie.

"Hey, Ro?" Remus says suddenly.

"What's up?"  Roman looks over at him.

Remus smiles softly at him, "Thank you again for everything you've done for me today. And for not forgetting my birthday like the others."

Roman smiles back at him and ruffles his hair, "Of course. I'll never forget your birthday."

#creativitwins #creativity twins #roman sanders #ts roman #remus sanders #ts remus #janus sanders #ts janus #ts logan #logan sanders #ts patton #patton sanders #virgil sanders #ts virgil #sanders sides fanfic #sanders sides #sanders sides fic #remus's birthday #remus angst #hurt/comfort #my writing

[ofkareenas]

.  ∘ ∗   :   🐝   𝙸𝙽𝙲𝙾𝙼𝙸𝙽𝙶   …

JANHVI KAPOOR, CIS WOMAN, TWENTY-FIVE, SHE / HER  ⟨  ✽  ⟩   hey, you haven’t bumped into  kareena puri  lately, have you? they have been living here for the past  two years  and during that time, locals have gotten to know them as  charismatic  &  creative.  a little birdie told me they can be quite  stubborn  &  opinionated  though. explains why they’re an online fashion brand owner and designer .  they really remind me of  morning beach walks, sketchbooks filled with new designs, the sound of a sewing machine running.  if you’re ever looking for them, i bet you can find them around port briar lighthouse.

hi again, it’s tally ! this is my second baby kareena !! she’s very new to me and it’s pretty exciting bc i tend to just recycle characters kjhfgkj again, if you’d like to plot, please reach out to me on dms, or you can like this and i’ll reach out. you can also talk to me on discord if you’d prefer that. ( gowon face insurance company#8416 ) also pls excuse how messy this is, i havent written a proper full intro in a while.

.  ∘ ∗   :   🐝   𝙱𝙸𝙾𝙶𝚁𝙰𝙿𝙷𝚈   …

kareena puri

march 30th, 1996 - 25 yrs old ; aries

cis woman, she/her, bisexual (closeted to her family, not so much to anyone else)

born in mumbai, india. raised in seattle, washington.

currently residing in port briar, maine

pinterest board: here

TW / CW: none, other than a controlling family, which idk if it even should be tagged but yuh

kareena knew it, she was lucky compared to others. she had it better than some of her peers, and she recognized that privilege. but if she could trade her family life for a “normal” one, she would in the quick snap of a finger.

kareena’s family was pretty much old money. she came from a long line of doctors in almost every medical field, and they own so many private hospitals and clinics in many countries. if you happen to hear the Puri family name, you probably would associate it with these things: a big hospital that you probably drove by with your car or a surgeon that your doctor wanted to refer you to.

every child in the family was expected to go to med school. it was the only way to keep the family legacy and pride going. of course, the more new generations came in the family, the more there were those who decided to take different fields of work instead. and of course, the eldest members in the family would always voice their disappointment in them, and would always make sure to remind them that they’re a disgrace no matter how successful they are in whatever field they went into.

kareena didn’t know what she was doing at the young age of sixteen. her parents would boast about how she would be a successful doctor when she grows up, just like her older siblings, and how her younger siblings would be the same as well. all kareena did was nod and smile. she didn’t want this.

the thing is, she was a naturally great student with really good grades, and yet her parents would be disappointed if she got a B+ or even an A- on a subject every once in a while. she didn’t get it. she thought she was doing her best. although the complaining about her report cards was getting a bit too much coming from her mother, and that’s when kareena really started to not give a fuck. yes, she still got good grades for her own sake, but she started to do whatever she wanted. she hung out with kids her parents would call a bad influence, and started to skip some school days or go to parties on the weekends. it was fun and liberating to her.

once her senior year was over and kareena was graduated with a high school diploma, her family was back at it again, trying to get her to apply to all the notable medical schools out there. she had protested about it, and family fights ensued, and with some threats, kareena was forced into applying. next school year, she was in another city, studying to be a surgeon, and her mind wasn’t into it at all. she only lasted one year before she decided to drop out and transfer to FIDM, a fashion school in L.A, instead.

kareena has always been into fashion. the way she dressed would tell you so. how she was always on the latest fashion, and how she would have so many sketchbooks and scrapbooks of fashion related things. she loved making her own clothes at home with her sewing machine. her mother would tell her that it’s a nice hobby, but she never guessed that her daughter would want to pursue it as a career. the color drained out of her face when she saw what kareena had done. she was angry and disappointed, and mostly worried about what the rest of the family would say, more than she cared about her daughter’s wants and needs. kareena, however, didn’t care. she was happy. she moved out to be closer to campus, and soon enough after graduation, she left everything behind and decided to go somewhere quieter: port briar, maine. this was completely different from everything she was used to, it was so quiet and small, but she loved it. she finally feels at peace with herself.

now, kareena is a successful fashion designer. she started an online business, and it has been booming, with fashion influencers promoting her work. she was hoping that someday she would get to do bigger things, like making custom items for celebrities and being featured in fashion magazines and fashion weeks. she could only wish and work towards that for now.

and even with all of that, even when kareena had picked herself up from the ground on her own and built her own business, her family still didn’t approve. they still pretended to care about her, but would make sure to remind her of how disappointed they are in her and the path she’d taken. they would sit and wonder what it would’ve been like if she continued to go to med school, and how successful she could’ve been. and all kareena would do in response is smile and say that she’s successful anyway, but at least now she’s doing something she actually loves.

.  ∘ ∗   :   🐝   𝙷𝙴𝙰𝙳𝙲𝙰𝙽𝙾𝙽𝚂   …

born in mumbai, india. moved to seattle, washington when she was still a baby, and was raised there for the rest of her life, all while still visiting family back home.

kareena is the middle child of 5 siblings. two older brothers and two younger sisters

she is bisexual, and she’s pretty open about it. except to her family. shes not out to them

she believes in working hard, but she also believes that everyone deserves to have fun and get a break every once in a while. she currently is the only main person doing all the work for her business, but she’s hoping to soon hire anyone who has the same interests as her

her designs are mostly evening wear dresses and such. think teuta matoshi or marionela type of dresses, all flowy and puffy, giving fantasy feels

altho i would say her success is more like early hope macaulay, when she was still starting out. if no one is familiar with her, she is an irish fashion and textile designer who got famous for her knit wear on instagram, and she’s p young !! u might recognize her work if u look her up <3

she currently lives alone port briar, with her rented home facing the beach. exactly how she likes it. it was different and definitely not lavish like her home growing up, but she liked it better. she could’ve lived somewhere more expensive, but she didn’t want that.

owns a studio where she usually works. there is more space for her there than what she used to have at home. all the design process, sewing and even photoshoots take place there usually

if not working, kareena could be found at the rocky beaches near the port’s lighthouse or off somewhere on an adventure. she is always here to have a good time

honestly kareena is still such a new character for me, so if i think of any other hcs, i’ll add them here

.  ∘ ∗   :   🐝   𝙲𝙾𝙽𝙽𝙴𝙲𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂   …

friends from school, could be from seattle or L.A: kareena would’ve kept in contact with those friends tbh shes the type of person to keep her friends around. even if they were just added to her snapchat or followed on instagram. she would keep up with them

toxic relationship / gf: THIS

exes ?? we could definitely plot this out

high school ex perhaps 👀

FWB: no strings attached 

neighbors: she lives on sea sprite lane

family members? kareena would be hoping that left them all behind in the past, but it can’t be denied that she has a big family and she could possibly run into any of them at any moment

omg crush perhaps ! idm if it’s one sided, and it could either be kareena having feelings or the other person

a friend she had a falling out with: she probably met this person two years ago when she first moved here. something might’ve happened and one thing after another, they dropped each other and it was probably the worst falling out for both of them

clients / customers for her business perhaps. or maybe a helping hand!! 

literally anything u wanna do, lets gooo

#briar.intro #heheh it's finally here

[floralkittygambler]

HuskerDust - More Toxic Than You Think [LONG]

This is the rough version of a deeper and more complex subject I want to ‘decorate’ with more ‘screencaps’.  DISCLAIMER: This is allegedly controversial and led to me getting literal death threats and an ED triggered. Ive about heard a lot of people’s shit on this so dont try it. I’m speaking from personal experiences too - experiences I really fuckin dont wanna be sharin yet they kinda validate my points. I want people to be aware of the damaging image from someone who can speak from experience without attracting dickheads or people twisting things. Again, I aint particularly comfortable sharing this so yeah- Be courteous- TW AHEAD - ALSO LONG ASS READ. DNI STANS OR ANTIS. May tag a few folks, may not.  HuskerDust is an extremely popular ship in the community however there’s glaringly obvious flaws in this one-sided relationship that both the fans and even the team fail to see. Neglecting the dangerous real world implications this ship [as well as many others] present to it’s audience - especially the more influenced of the audience, most who are children.

Angel flirts with all the male cast however one who catches his eye the most is Husk. Now I want to point out a few things [of many... obviously]; Angel is instantly starry eyed upon seeing Husk, likewise he actually started off with a ‘Hey~’ instead of something sexual. However he quickly ruins this after Husk tells him to go fuck himself [defined by: “ go fuck yourselfphrase of fuckVULGAR SLANGan exclamation expressing anger or contempt for, or rejection of, someone.” ie, he rejected instantly] by responding with an offer to allow Husk to essentially watch him masterbate. Alongside this, he cradles his face. Husk pulls away and seems to pull a face to express rage/disgust or growling imagery alongside COMPLETELY withdrawing his body away from Angel as Angel stares with goo-goo eyes. Firstly, Angel loves animals - perhaps it’s Husk appearing cute that adds to this, however Im not going to address animal imagery just yet. Secondly, Angel isn’t really portrayed to respect other’s boundaries BUT he does respect... Alastor’s. Al declines the blowjob to which Angel shrugs and doesn’t push this matter any further. With Husk, he’s pretty harshly told to piss off yet he makes quite and explicitly sexual remark, alongside invading his personal space and touching a man clearly disinterested and pulling away. From the initial rejection, it then becomes sexual harassment.  I also want to add that Husk comes with [some] perks in his feline form. And if my name didnt make it obvious, I work with and live with cats on a daily. Briefly, I have been educated in how to understand cat’s language in various individual cat as well as how to handle and work with them. Cats are often drawn towards me and Ive been successful with various types of cats. My most recent being a cat I’ve dubbed as Big - Big was abandoned quite young and has lived most his life on the streets [where I live is high in crime and drug rings, so you can imagine how strays are treated] leading to him being extremely fearful and hating people, hissing and fleeing just seeing people. I took time out last summer to finally give befriending him a shot. It’s taken just under a year of hard work and now he visits every day for his mush [wet food] and kisses, responds to his name and runs up to me in delight. Ive even taught him a phrase to signal that I dont want him or the other cat’s to fight [keeps them all safe and aids them becoming acquainted under supervision - something that’s been working surprisingly well]. I apologise in advance as this is not going to be the first instance of this sort of thing but they are relevant. Trying my best to keep it as brief.  For Husk, I will be using a mix of cat and human characteristics to break down his reactions.  In this first interaction, he turns his body away in a way to suggest caution, wariness and disinterest. In fact, much of his general body language is that of a man deeply closed off from connections - for starters, he folds his arms quick a bit which suggests lack of openness, shutting off and defensiveness *usually*. Likewise, when touched, he slightly jumps and tenses before pulling back in aggression with flattered ears - a sign cats give to display extreme hostility in a situation. It’s NEVER a good thing but then again, neither is crossing someone’s boundaries. It’s even stated that Husk hates Angel’s advances and wishes for nothing to do with him - the same dislike of sexual advances that Al dislikes in Angel. The ending as they all walk inside, Angel turns to Husk, winking and blowing a kiss his way despite the clear rejection earlier. In fact, Husk once again grows tense and is even irked by such a gesture. This won’t be the last mention of Angel totally disregarding how Husk feels - something that rubs off onto the fans AND the team themselves. And it’s... *concerning*, to phrase it lightly. Angel so far is the most persistent towards the most resistant, and in my post on RadioDust I have already established [briefly] on how Angel seems to chase unavailable men. The more unavailable, the more tempting. The one that got away, mentality. It’s not healthy. And I’m surprised so few have acknowledged this. Taking a break from what we’ve seen in the Pilot, let’s establish some facts about the pair.  Angel died in 1947 in his 30s [some posts specify 34-35], putting his birth year around 1911-12ish. Husk died in the 70s IN his 70s [again, nothing is truly specified, so for both we’ll go with 75 - the same number in his IG username] that puts birth year roughly 1900′s. Now an age gap between two adults of 11 - 12 years difference is actually reasonable and can work, depending on circumstance and whether theres a balance in power or not. But when we account for their life experiences and death ages, it’s something else entirely. Angel died young. Not only that but his mind seems more stuck in his raunchy teens than of an adult. And even THEN, he wouldnt be one to necessarily settle down [by which I mean in life, not romance]. He’s extremely emotionally stunted and his selfishness and wanting his own way come off very spoilt [when Husk is pissed off about the cat costume, Angel gets moody because he’s used to compliments AND is dressing to impress Husk. When Husk wanted the money he was rightfully owed, Angel threw a fit for ages until starting to earn it back - even though he owed Husk a drink, which I’ll be coming back to, Husk still wanted the money in the end perhaps hinting to only accepting a freebie as it’s on offer as well as Angel being overly persistent. He even dumps his pig onto Husk to look after, while theres no issue in pet sitting, Angel said Husk ‘owed’ him due to missing the show yet when HE owed Husk, he threw a fit.]. Angel’s life style is wildly chaotic in life AND death, and even though we all know he’s most likely going to be redeemed, he still lacks a lot of experiences in life. He lacks maturity.  On the other hand, Husk’s been through his own share of chaos and heartbreak. Difference is, he’s had a life time of experience. He doesn’t act immature in a childish sense. He truly behaves like a downtrodden old man. He’s had his days and would feel more secure settling down in a more peaceful environment with fun yet much needed calm. A better way to handle his need for risk. Age gaps in adults that are large [75 - 35 = 40 years!] are far less likely to work for a multitude of reasons. The main reason is the difference in life stages - that difference in mentality and experiences plays such an impacting role on compatibility. Often their goals and energies are polar opposites and their common grounds minimal. There’s also the looming concern of power dynamics. Whilst it’s usually the older figure that’s holds the power advantage, in this case it’s a little bit more complicated. I’d argue that it’s possibly Angel with the higher power. This rarely works irl but it’s POSSIBLE. Look at Hugh Heffner and his last partner before his death. I believe she was around 22. However there’s many common grounds, immediate attraction, and similar goals. Though incorrect, Heffner does give off a pimp-like vibe (he’s not but you get what I’m implying with mothlike imagery). Husk does not strike me as that type. It would definitely cheapen his character. In terms of interests, the main thing they have in common is that they like to drink. A bad habit, especially when one is an alcoholic. Both are also rather lazy except for certain circumstances [Husk will go out of his way to help HOWEVER he’s obliged to under Al, the only one he’s seen to willingly help and bond with/be seen with is Niffty. Angel is when there’s a fight, chaos, drama or any sex work]. Both are also rather snarky and vulgar. In terms of love, both suffer intimacy issues. On Husk, it’s ‘losing the ability to love a long time ago’ meaning he was likely cheated on or at least had a failed relationship. If he was ever ready for a new start, he’d definitely want something stable yet rewarding. For now, he needs a LOT of work - work he is not yet willing to put in, nor does he have a reason to. Angel doesnt want to commit because he’s extremely selfish as well as in an already abusive ‘relationship’ already. Sex work is sometimes VERY taxing on the mental health due to some of the folk you service. He’s seen the worst in many and just enjoys the pay and fuck. IF Husk was cheated on, then it’d make a lot of sense if a sex worker wouldn’t be his flavour, it would just serve as a reminder. Not only this, but Angel HIMSELF actively participates in cheating. Not with Val... but with *Travis*. BOTH know Travis is married (I’d be feckin worried if Trav didnt-) yet they still choose to cheat anyways, regardless of the pain it could cause. Angel even mocks this by sending greetings to Trav’s wife. Honestly this... Reminds me a LOT of Stolas - a main character who sexually harasses another character clearly not interested/comfortable, participates in cheating and we’re supposed to root for them (and before anyone gets offended, I do have more to say on Angel’s behalf so please be patient). Either way, it’s very toxic and concerning. Even if Husk wasn’t cheated on, I dont think many would feel exactly secure after having such a rough past with love, diving into a relationship with someone who’s openly participated in multiple affairs. And that’s no shitting on sex workers either, it’s just a point that some would feel uncomfortable with the idea of being with ANYONE (regardless of their work) having actively and KNOWINGLY took part in having an affair previously - especially multiple. Husk’s in an emotionally fragile place and needs more security. We’ve already established Husk heavily dislikes Angel’s advances. In fact, his responses to Angel are similar to his responses to... Al! His body language is VERY test and closed off to even Al, who’s most likely knew him for a very long time. If even Al gets this treatment (whilst also disrespecting his boundaries) then it’ll be the same with Angel (both force Husk into their lives and schemes, both disregard his boundaries). And he’s shown to STILL go out his way to help both however this is most likely tied to an unspoken ‘debt’ he owes Alastor. Plus he’s been mentioned behind the scenes to be a secret softie and protective grandpa type. But this animosity is very reflective of how Loona behaves and responds to Blitzo as well as how both Loona AND Husk (One being a ‘lowly servant’, the other being a literal old MAN) as pets - even the fans - just because of their forms. But this isnt the first of the disrespect they receive. Now we delve deeper Both are addicts of some kind (Husk - drinking, gambling. Angel - Drugs, possibly sex). Not a good mix at all romantically. Addicts often and unintentionally feed their addictions to each other as well as can increase likelihood of relapsing which even a recovered addict can slip back into. When times get tough (a natural occurrence) both are likely to suffer with their addictions. Interestingly, they can become addicted and dependent on one another, which is genuinely unhealthy for a mindset anyways, regardless whether addiction existed prior or not. Addiction only increases these chances. Angel likes confidence in a man (confirmed on Patreon). Yet, Husk is even confirmed  in streams to be deeply troubled and insecure. One thing he hates is his demon form, something that we’ll touch on shortly. Angel loves quality food ESPECIALLY of Italian origin whilst Husk is willing to eat the shit they give you in bars (admittedly that was painful to type as someone who grew up around pubs - either way it’s not exactly high quality or gourmet is what I’m saying). Interestingly, in some character references of Angel, it’s stated that he hates rejection. Hates. That’s a VERY strong word. This could explain but not justify why he’s persistent with Husk (similar to NiceGuys believing you’re playing ‘hard to get’ - further illuding to an immature and toxic mindset) though it interestingly doesn’t apply with Alastor. Odd.  There’s a counterpoint to symbolism in art. A very VALID counterarguement... If it suited Viv’s style. During Media Studies, Business, Design and Art, hell fucking Silent Hill! - I’ve been educated on effective symbolism as well as artistic trademarks (the most famous that most should know is Alfred Hitchcock!). Hitchcock often appeared in all his films, usually as a sidefacing silhouette, trading marking his films with his very PRESENCE. Viv’s seems to revolve around hearts. I mention this because an IG account made the point that hearts were to symbolise anyone connected with Angel’s story and love life (Valentino’s business and shades/collar, heart behind Angel’s head, Heart tattoo on Cherri’s right shoulder, hearts for Husk’s paws, eyebrow marks above natural brows, wings, and nose as well as most of the playing cards). Thing is, there’s hearts EVERYWHERE in all of Viv’s works and such symbology of Angel and hearts is weakened if it connects to the villains/abusers as well - taking away the positivity in a love symbol. Viv’s used hearts in her font, backgrounds, in characters ears, in all her series just generalised, Blitzo’s forehead, background characters, again the cards, Travis’s eyes, Millie’s right shoulder in the SAME place as Cherris. Even Vaggie had a heart tattoo on the shoulder in some christmas themed artwork (on her left). Heart’s is just something Viv seems to brand herself with. And that’s fine though I feel she could do with cutting it down slightly. One thing to early note on the cards (again, this’ll creep up later and my name should tell you why), most are heart suits and usually either a face card (J, Q, K), Joker, ace or 2s. Face cards/Jokers for more details close up (look at the signing artwork) and the rest are just easier to animate, though a little bit of a peeve to someone into their cards as well as the massive overuse of red in Hazbin overall. It’s extremely unlikely to be symbolic. If they change it to be so, then it’s... Weakened. As I’ve mentioned earlier, Silent Hill is an example of extremely clever symbolism in more darker media (more so, SH is considered a ‘hell’ of sorts and does feature religious iconography WITHOUT causing offence. A great example of how to portray this type of thing - they even mix humour in if you consider some of the sneaky references, dialogues and odd UFO/dog endings).  Discussing Viv’s art further, she drew a gift for her sister (original creator of Husk when he possessed white fur) of Angel playfully dragging a disinterested and annoyed Husk (I believe this was still around the time SpiderMoth was canon). The newish art tends to have Angel putting a holly crown on him or sitting on his knees, Husk seeming too lazy to really do anything about it. Very nonchalant. I also want to include some interesting stream arts here and later to further highlight their bond.  A fan asked Viv in a stream to draw them “actually getting along” - this wording implying that the fan is aware of Husk not enjoying Angel’s company. So Viv did, with an extra doodle of Husk being one of the ‘canadian people’ from South Park who sing “Im not your friend”. The art alone shows Husk’s absolute discomfort, even the extra thing Viv added w/o request. As they’re her characters and the fan asked for what they’d look like getting along, to show this discomfort goes to show the dynamic once planned. Husk just isnt a fan of Angel, especially when he’s being sexual and touchy. It can be great for small comedic parts, however both the team AND fans have now crossed this over to really creepy and triggering realms in their ships. It’s creepy and doesnt look good on Angel (who they actively root for) nor the gay community (more on that).

[Yes Ive already pointed out the comedic side of this ^ but it doesnt bode well considering the other points and issues that arise] There’s also a request for drag angel flirting with drunk husk. Personally thats a lil creepy to specify one of the two being intoxicated and thus not able to truly consent. If Angel is willing to flirt with someone in that state, it doesnt mean he would fuck them, but it does feel the fan was thinking that’s the case. In all truth, I think Angel WOULD flirt with those incapable of consent purely to swindle or pickpocket. I’d like to think [and HOPE considering his own abuse by Val] that he’d never take it further. And I hope Viv, the team and the fans see how incredibly creepy that thought is. I’ll give benefit of the doubt though it is still a concern. Either way, Angel appears... Annoyed? Husk is completely turned away and seems incredibly grouchy and confused. This shows yet more rejection on his behalf as well as Angel’s response to being rejected, which highlights his immaturity towards it. Remember, he’s USED TO and EXPECTS everyone to want him (even saying this in the Pilot). Hell, there’s even a Rich Vaggie request where Viv again randomly includes Husk. This time, he’s faced towards her and relaxed, though seems unimpressed and overall disinterested in this type of behaviour. Behaviour and interests of Angel [Celeb status and rich appearance due to Val, despite getting very little of the cut and the vanity, as well as Husk just not giving a shit about this sort of peacock display]. (Also wanted to note in Viv’s #3 stream 1:50:50, Faust makes out that Husk is a ‘dirty, creepy old man’ as well as him constantly threatening violence towards Angel. I dont see him as *creepy* in this context - as it implies perversion that he blatantly lacks fortunately - though it’s very telling of how Husk feels and again shows this toxic relationship).

/Angel’s Type: First off, daddy issues. He has them. Now let’s look at ‘daddy’. Henroin is shorter than Angel, dark fur, grumpy, old, wears only a hat and tie, big brows... Sounds familiar? Ok, look at his brother Arackniss. Similar to Henroin, dark, short, grouchy, bullied by and bullies Angel, is adverse to Angel and overall possess a bad relationship. Ok.... His main client, Travis! Short, dark fur, moody, Only wears hat and tie, drinker (shown in stream as request so take drinking with a pinch), similar face to- Is no one else seeing this trait? Angel seems to go for these shorter than him grouchier men who either want him for sex or hate his presence. Men who are like his dad and brother. All of these guys are far too similar, and we’ve got enough men in suits, bowties and sharp teeth in this show to boot as it is- The psychology of this type of attachment is rooted in a bad familial relationship alongside the subconscious desire to repair or compensate for it. Unknowningly the person will keep seeking out this sort of guy who isnt good for them to fix this internal issue. The resolution is to NOT go for these types. It’s also connected to intimacy fears, by going for those you know arent good for you/right for you/interested in you is often the manifestation of these issues. Pair them with daddy issues and it’s a disaster! There is science to back this up. Valentino is interestingly the opposite yet still toxic issues arise. Why? Because he’s going from one extreme to the other but with the same mindset. Neither of these men or types for MANY reasons are right for him. And visa versa. Seeing a pattern? ~~~~

Angel w Husk? I mentioned before that Husk hates his demon form. If you’re an old man, a gambler, some Vegas bloke and have this grouchier disposition, why the fuck would you want to look like an oversized pet? Exactly. Angel however adores his own aside from the feet. Now I find it strange how the guy we’re rooting for just so happens to like his own form which was intended for punishment. But that’s not todays post. I said earlier that Angel is heavily fixated on Husk’s appearance. Especially the feline aspects (calling him Husky and Kitty - petnames he hates that also treat him again more like a pet than a man -, dressing as a ‘sexy cat’ to appeal to him which can come off as more mockery. This is even backed up by fans who seem to think an old guy’s gonna act like some school girl anime trope?). All of this completely disregards and disrespects Husk’s feelings and perspectives. Something the fans and team take part in actively. Angel - whether you want to hear this or not - is SELFISH. When Husk ‘owed’ him for missing the show (babysitting Fat Nuggets), Husk begrudgingly fulfils this. The second Angel owed Husk for stealing drinks, Angel threw a hissy fit. The silent treatment, going to other bars and posting about it whilst complaining (again focusing on Husk being ‘cute’). Trying to cop out of it by buying Husk a smoothie (though it looked like a date, lets be real, do you REALLY have to bribe someone to date and be around you? No) and even then he still had to owe the money which was more of Husk’s concern. Yes he did in the end and more money than needed, hence the returning of the extra cash, but that is no excuse for the childish behaviour prior. He’s much too accustomed to being adored and pampered and getting his own way that he cant grasp when people arent a fan or willing to pamper him. If they make them a ship, all it does it make Angel completely into a shitty Gary-Stu that everyone loves and pities for his suffering, rather than teach him to grow, earn his redemption and confronting his own toxicity. Let me make this extremely clear: ANGEL DOES NOT DESERVE ABUSE OR RAPE. But when he starts behaving as shitty, he’s hard to root for. Remember, he’s sexually harassing all these guys, with Husk getting the brunt of it. But it’s treated as a joke for them and only taken seriously for Angel. Val abuses all of his employees. He abuses VOX and even THAT was mocked by fans and staff. It’s... It’s frankly gross.  In every interaction Husk has with Angel, his body language is closed off, tense, uncomfortable, turned away and hostile - look at the IG. He wont even allow Angel to touch him. Compare this to Niffty, who he’s fine with taking pictures with and letting her hang around and touch him. Body language is relaxed (relaxed shoulders, open body language) and he doesnt look hostile at all. What does Angel do? Always tries to get close to Husk (such as sitting as close as possible during Poker) and forces both his OWN hobbies onto Husk (ones that Husk shows a strong disinterest in) and Husk’s hobbies (Poker). It’s very FORCED and not natural. Going back to immaturity, he blames Husk and his cards for being shit at the game. They’re always bickering, insulting, fighting in the comments but fans only see this as a ‘cute couple fight’ or Husk being ‘tsundere’.Tsundere. An anime trope often used in young characters. Irl tsundere is NOT this dramatised. The tsundere you see in anime, apply that irl and you get the recipe for the most toxic, petty and immature relationship going. You get constant fights, unease, not feeling loved/appreciated, little trust - the list goes on. Plus an old bloke really isnt going to indulge in tsundere traits. It’s childish. After his history with love, I doubt he’d be up for games and messing about. For something meaningful, he’d just want open honesty. Their ‘relationship’ feels like it’s written by horny kids attempting a fanfic after being inspired by 50 shades and twilight (both show toxic relationshiiiiiips~). The worst is that these are adult writers trying to portray some realistic yet sensitive topics. This is just ill fuckin taste. Even the warnings in Helluva’s ‘Horny Demons’ leaves a bad taste when the fans are thinking Stolas is the best dad despite both parents ruining Octavia’s mental health. Despite the next day after that episode aired Stolas starts flirting with Blitzo again on IG. Despite Blitzo being clearly uncomfortable and sexually harassed and even co-herced into sex (VERY UNHEALTHY MESSAGES HERE). Viv herself has been in bad relationships so how the fuck she’s blind to this and even borderline fetishizing this sort of behaviour that everyone seems to play off as ‘Awwww cute tsundere <3 BOYFRIENDS BOYFRIENDS BOYFRIENDS’ is abhorrent. I’ll go into this more later on how this really just... It treats male sexual harassment and assault as a fucking joke- Angel’s constant unwarranted flirting is no different from the freaks on IG that send dick pics to underage kids and random women in their dms and fathom that they’re ‘nice’ and have a ‘chance’. Wanna know the creepiest? The candid photo of Husk on Angel’s wall. Something Husk seems horrified about. It’s fangirlish and teenager like at BEST, and obsessive stalker at worst. He’s NOT respecting Husk’s boundaries or feelings. That’s still up despite Husk’s reaction. He still wore the costume despite Husk’s feelings. Angel’s thinking with his dick and it’s such a fucked up message that everyone seems to support just because ‘its FICTION. Theyre in HELL.Theyre BAD people.’ Yeah? Well look at how that’s effecting and warping reality and perspective. It’s glamourising it. Fetishsizing stalking and making it cute. Yer have celebrity or boyband or whatever youre a fan of pics on your wall. NOT your crush. NOT someone who clearly isnt interested or happy with this. If someone who kept commenting on your pictures “sexy” suddenly had a picture of you on their wall, what would YOU think? How would YOU FEEL? Because myself and my own sisters have been in VERY fucking similar situations and it’s traumatic. His paw is even attempting the lens - Angel is crossing his boundaries and not getting the message that Husk doesnt want this. He’s forcing himself onto Husk. Yknow... VAL forced himself on Angel and it ended up in numerous rapes. Angel hasnt raped Husk, but if he wont take no. If he wont respect boundaries. If he only wants Husk to do what he wants but throws a fit when he owes husk - he’s picking up on Val’s bad habits more and more. How are so few - even the very team creating this - not seeing how disgusting this is? Are we only supposed to give a shit if Angels hurt? If so, the message isnt so much of how despicable Val is but how awful it is to upset Angel. Fans constantly blame Husk for being grumpy, annoyed at or rejecting Angel. Look at this real world implication. Not only that but Angel being gay just reinforces one of the worlds most disgusting and inaccurate stereotype of gay men being sexual predators and forcing men to have sex whether theyre comfortable or not. MOST gay men arent like this, and those who are its just because THEYRE shitty people (Jeffree fucking Starr, but look how people ‘stan’ his fuckin behaviour). Val is rubbing off on Angel as much as fiction has a MASSIVE impact on reality - whether we’re willing to admit it or not. Like Val, hes pushing past boundaries, he’s selfish, hes more into visuals than anything else. It’s one sided, superficial and theres no click. No connection. Be in this situation yourself and seeing this sorta shit becomes second nature to stay alive. Angel even says that most of hells residents are ‘ugly freaks’ yet finds Husk cute. It’s all LOOKS. Who else likes appearances alone? Val. I know this will trigger and upset fans, Ive been told to fucking die and have my ED triggered when I mentioned it before. But accept that all of them have flaws. Everyone irl have flaws. But there’s flaws and then theres a fuckin crime. If Husk was a woman, more people would see the flaw, but even then... Look at many romance movies - not all but many go for opposites attract (science proves this inaccurate irl), stalking, or even sexual harassments and assualts but she falls for him and they end up together. That aint love thats Stockholm with extra steps. Think you’re triggered and upset? Go through this shit - have a history with it happening - and then see some show you love and a comfort character get treated the exact same and everyone JUSTIFIES it, including the team themselves. It’s NOT cute.  Part 2 to the previous point: Both do share common interests, but it’s very unhealthy such as excessive drinking, both being addicts and being rather lazy, etc. Otherwise the common ground just isnt good. They’re opposites that really dont compliment each other. (Not a valid point here but I find it interesting how Angel loves aquariums and Husk can fly too). Viv’s writing is mediocre at best (but with glowing potential - a diamond in the rough - hence why it’s so frustrating) but Husk’s writing is the laziest. According to Viv he’s (paraphrased) “easiest to write... doesnt care about anything, almost always grumpy leading to similar reactions to everything”. His voice and alcoholism even has a lot of inspiration from Rick Sanchez. As I said with Angel in the RadioDust post, it’s almost like the addictions are seen as a joke. A running gag is fine if you can play it off well and it’s not about something so serious EVEN MORE SO when the series is about how damaging the addictions are and redemption. Why is this end goal being ignored unless it’s about Angel himself? That’s not just favouritism or bias, that’s also heavily self indulgent and a backwards ass message. Right now, Hazbin and Helluva have this ugly fixation on sex and ships. VIV has a fixation on ‘horny demons’. Her main characters are incredibly sexual bar Al (dont even say Husk, Niffty, Charlie or Vaggie or even loona and Moxxie are even on par with the focus and treatment Val, Angel, Blitz and Stolas are given). It’s very fixated and concerning. Its starting to feel like it’s about to divulge into hentai than a legit series with even a hint of the plot or a message. It reminds me of Family Guy trying to be BoJack. It’s starting to remind me of fucking Sausage Party and the final orgy. Sex and swears makes it inappropriate for kids but that doesnt make it adult or mature, and this is coming from someone who swears more than a fucking sailor whos stubbed his bare pinky toe on a fucking crate corner. Constant swears arent funny or artful in the slightest when it’s over done. It’s just... childish adult humour. We cant be expected to want to root for any of them at this rate- All A24 and other companies are seeing is big cash and easily manipulated child audiences (for easy money). They KNOW it can be better but theyd rather be lazy as they’ll profit big either way. This is going to end up like YanSim and YanDev. Amazing potential, shit writing with a leader too stubborn to accept and act on criticism, seeing it as hate. At this point, Husk isnt a deeply troubled man with vices and interests. He’s just fuck candy and romantic end goal for Angel. To compliment and complete him. Just another accessory to the Angel Show. Vivs sister who made Husk even loves Angel so it’ll only serve to further this already toxic narrative.  The ship doesnt look or feel right. There’s too much established now to see the dynamics and favouritism in the creators. Self indulgence. You cant play favourites when you do this sort of thing professionally. The audience can see it and it turns people away. Ask any nonHaz/Helluva fan what they think and it’s... Well, average.  Another thing is everyone went full hype on Frozen focusing on something other than romance as a form of love. But then go back to “Ok now everyone reenact the final scenes of Sausage Party” afterwards. Not everything is sex and romance, and it really is starting to feel Viv and the fans are focused on that like Incels focusing on ‘chad’. It’s creepy. Helping with food, telling someone self conscious on their weight that they’re not fat, not taking more money than someone owes, even helping out with a pet - that’s something that a good friend would do. In fact, Husk even laughs at the goofy Angel cutout and it being destroyed. It doesnt instantly equate to wanting to fuck. The fact that the fans and even some of the team seem borderline horny is... Completely destroying this show, it’s message and everything about it. Viv said ships were hardly the focus in her stream but look at it now. Look at what Viv focuses on now. It’s just fanservice shit. Nothing more. Self indulgence shit, look at the team making rape into a fetish or shipping themselves publicly with the characters on the public IGs. It’s like watching children run a business and it’s painful because the entire series is suffering when it could be amazing.  Friendship should be more normalised as a valuable type of relationship just as much as love or family are. I’ll also add that Husk adding after the show “Oh fuck... Is this what I missed? Shit.” is ooc like the ‘date’ (that was compensation for stolen drinks, like a tamer version of Blitzo fucking Stolas for the grimoire). It contradicts that he slept it off rather than an attempt at staying awake, as well as calling it a “god damn peepshow” implying a repulsion to the peverse tendencies. The constantly commenting, following and posting Angel related pics makes little sense either from someone who’s blatantly been sexually harassed as well as the clear repulsion of the candid pic on the wall. He outright rejected Angel. What would be realistic are the IGs focusing on learning about the characters, their lives and interests - ALL updating at realistic paces. Old men arent tech savvy usually nor care for social media that much. He’d post drinks, gambling, casinos, life with Niffty and Alastor. Heck maybe a picture of Angel captioned “When will this guy leave me the FUCK alone?”. He even only seems to tag angel, even in the pic that had Charlie and Vaggie [their shared account] or Niffty. Theres a CLEAR bias in the staff room and it’s messy. Look how most the female cast is ignored (Vaggie/Charlie, Velvet who posted a birthday gift to one of the new artists on the merch WHY? Gasu btw, Niffty, Millie only posting twice - heck even Vox and Loona sometimes get neglected. CLEAR. BIAS.) The ships focused on are 1) NOT established canon yet publicly favoured by Viv and the team (Stoliz, HuskerDust, VoxVal - that last pair havent actually got a VA either-), 2) Are TOXIC and theme around abuse or sexual harassment but it’s ‘cute because gae’ - NO. This makes gay people look really bad when they’re not. 3) HD and SL focus on one sided, stalkerish, cop out ‘tsundere’ excused ships to sugar coat the creepiness which only further fuels bigotry, 4) SL has MERCH on it now, so thats also profiting on sexual harassment imagery (again, dont give a shit they arent real - the EFFECTS are. The people who can relate ARE. The people being horridly stereotyped ARE). Thing is, the IGs originally were there to promote ADDICT which started as a fan song anyways despite everyone saying how Viv is stubborn in her ways an uninfluenced by her fans (proof says otherwise) yet shes allowed a fan song to be canon. Theres a focus on forced love for fanservice. The IGs have long outstayed their welcome. The Val account allows glamourisation of the sick shit Val does AND entinses fans to bully as they forget a REAL PERSON runs the fucking account, Val isnt even a scary villain either - hes just a big teen like everyone else - stuck in a teen drama with all this. Pimps are smart. Theyre scary. Theyre masters of manipulati- HOW DO THEY NOT DO THE RESEARCH?! Viv wanted this sense of realism and dealing with sensitive topics in one of the worst executed ways Ive ever seen- It’s toxic. It’s dangerous. These are shit messages and your fans display that when they think all criticism is ‘hAtE’ and actively bully real people w REAL EXPERIENCES. Telling them to ‘stop pls’ does fuck all because you still promote shit messages straight after. Like with Stolas to Blitz in a IG story a day after Ep 2. Classy.  Fanservice seems desperate to keep these fans (rather than market correctly... Just like YanDev) and it leads to fans feeling like they have the audacity to steer the series. Poor business with WEAK boundaries. Viv, you lost your series a long time ago. Want it back? LISTEN TO LEGIT CRITICISM. Stop surrounding yourself with yes men. Even my best fucking friend calls me out when Im out of line because a real friend will fucking take the chance of hurting your feelings if it means helping you in the long run and grow.  Mick joked about the inside of Husk’s ears matching Angels coat, that the ears are cat’s most sensitive and vulnerable parts. 1) Cats vulnerable part is their tummy - hence why you need their trust first (alternatively yer get the odd cat that has full confidence they cat hurt you a lot faster than you can tickle them - I own one), 2) Its weird that Viv doesnt know this considering how many cats she has - its important to learn the language of those you love to give them your full understanding and a great bond 3) This romanticises sexual harassment more than it already is in the media (remember, theres women out there still murdered for saying no!) as well as reinforces the stereotypes of gay men forcing non-interested men into sex (again, a very toxic and unrealistic trope - a dangerous one thats led to gays being murdered!). And the ears design is unnecessarily overly complex considering those fuckin wings he supports. If the design adds nothing to the character but aesthetic, then it can go on the chopping block. Rules for simple animation. Besides from Angel sharing the same tooth as Val (who knows if that was added after he started working for Val as branding?) you could use this argument to say Pent or Al are soulmates for Angel because of having striped suits, or sharp teeth - no, it was intended as a joke that Viv fueled to irresponsibly because it’s not the first time she’s dodged publicly addressing something (something youll NEED to get used to in a big company), and she’s publicly dodged shit after this too so Im not putting faith in her until she can act professionally as the job requires. Likewise, professionals should consider what and how they joke as they’re presenting an image of a company/business. And people WILL eat that shit up face value regardless. In her stream #2, a fan requests for art of flustered angel and smug husk to fuel their ship. at 2:10:21, she does so. She’s also done this for Baxter x Niffty and Cherri x Tom. As a professional, you really should be avoiding this sort of thing in the name of fanservice. I get it, fanservice = financial gain. But it also results in empty meaning. It’s a shell of what the passion project once was, hence why you make the ENTIRE skeleton before involving others. The team help construct the muscles, tendons and organs. The public - moreso critics and the more experienced in those fields help sew the skin. Then you bring it to life, the fans become like blood. They aid to keep it alive. Even Ash and Mick mention Husk being ‘tsundere’. Im had most my piece about it earlier, however I’ll repeat and add some extras. Tsundere is an exaggerated personality, often used in younger characters. In terms of a relationship, it’s very immature, leads to poor communication and results in a toxic love. Science can back this up as well as the lack of realism. It’s more immature minds/hearts that go to what they interpret as tsundere in hopes of the love life the media portrays. A farce. Y’know what Angel needs? Someone open, honest, open to love and comforting. He doesnt need someone rebuffing and him chasing. It’s nothing more than an immature thrill. Once the love begins, it’s burns out QUICK. It’s far from sustainable or healthy. It’s not what either really need and further show Angel’s fixation on men who subconsciously remind him of his father. It’s not healthy. Another thing is a tsundere actually IS interested but shows it in the most immature and childish means possible. Would a really old bloke actually give a shit to play those sorts of games? No. Not one coming from a place like husk has. It’s painful how lacking in research and experience these people are. Science backs up that opposites solemnly attract also. In fact, they often either repel or only get as far as friendship.  Fan and Team Mentality in Brief: Im coming out with my ultimate pet peeve: if you’re going to have one of the MAIN characters be a gambler, do your research. The only background shit is a casino, LOADS of sex references (in Pride? Really?) and drugs. It’s like someone listing what they think is adult and tabboo and naughty. It’s yikes. Cards are almost always aces, 2s or blank. MOST are heart suits (like we need MORE red - we get it, it’s hell. But it’s an immature larvae stage hell). I get 2s and aces being easier to animate, however you have Husks wings, the entire of alastor, angels arms - if youre busting the budget for the menial then bust it to the cards. Theres like ONE spade. The full house isnt a full house (here’s a display of the fans lack of education on the matter as well which serves as a sure sign that they know just as little on any of this as SpindleHorse, they think it’s a sign on him being a card cheat. A card cheat. I aint saying hes not but what I AM saying is poker professionals are some of the most observant people in the world. Especially when money’s involved they’ll ensure youve got your facts right. That wouldnt fly at ALL. But theres more~ fans think Husk spent loaaaads of time staring at angel’s face in the IG poker out of <3 Newsflash. When you play poker you read EVERYONE like a book. Every little twist and twitch of the features. Its not about love. It’s about winning. Its about money. Play enough poker and it’s instinct if you want to actually play decently. Call bluffs. Life aint a fuckin romance.) And playing Poker at a BlackJack table? In a casino? These are all common knowledge and basics if you just research. And this is coming from someone with a history of this.  The fans even believed Tipsy Bartender’s ‘Peach Princess Cocktail’ was something Spindlehorse made as a beverage form of Niffty, Angel and even Charlie because of the name. Now, Im not expecting everyone to be a fuckin boozy either, but to not even consider it’s a very real drink does show that many fans are far too young for that 18+ label.  Fanart of HD often has Husk being OOC OR being held hostage (often via webs - one even being reblogged by Viv, aint that cute!). Some even have Husk completely intoxicated, which would be rape. Im not sugarcoating it. Because too many are getting the sweet treatment and copying Viv’s ‘dont address and it disappears!’ tactic - A LOT of internet celebs do it. The ship is drawn a lot by the team in the public eye, Viv reblogs it publicly (SL, HD, alongside canon only ships, how curious-). Husk is pan yet doesnt behave as the stereotype. And Id FULLY support this with my fucking SOUL (fun fact: you cant sell a soul. Thats myth to scare people-) if it was done correctly. But the way bisexuals, lesbians, gays and aces are portrayed so stereotypically (even Pan in terms of Val’s sexomania), it’s really REALLY uncomfortly coming across as Husk being pansexual JUST to make him an ‘option’ for Angel. Hell even the hets are given a shite representation. Some art btw has husk tricked into a kiss. Cute, we’re really starting to like blurring consent aint we? Remember, Angel has celeb power in his world. In the real world, he has a following. HE has the power in the ship massively. Hell, fans JUSTIFY Angels behaviour and absolutely rip Husk a new shithole if he fuckin even so as to DARE OPPOSE ANGELS MUCH DESERVED LOVE! - sarcasm because I have to make that shit clear now. Fans dont care about Husks feelings, he wasnt even popular until this ship started to explode. Y’know what would be cool and break stereotypes? An old straight white guy actually accepting his friends sexualities. The pan thing feels really fucking gimicky and exploitive and gross based on the history of all this shit. It feels disingenuine. Representation doesnt come from it just being there. What next? Katie whips on blackface to further show shes a bigoted knobhead whos white and straight? Dont get me wrong, Katie’s an arsehole but theres other means to show this rather than ALL HETS HATE THE BIG GAE. They dont. They really dont. But hey, we’ll show a gay man sexually harass every guy and root for him! NO. Thats fucked up. It makes gays look like the predators theyre not. It’s like the fucking 50s with modern tech - is that the real identity of Vox? Fuckin maybe. WHAT THEY NEED - FUCKING FINALLY, ITS THE END IVE BEEN ON THIS SHIT FOR DAYS WHILST SICK LUCKY ME EH? CAN YER FEEEEEEEL MY TIREDNESS OF FANDOMS AND CREATORS EXCUSING SHITTY THINGS FOR CLOUT, MONEY, FAME AND OTHER DUMB SHIT? IF YOU CANT, THEN WHAT THE FUCK, AND OTHER NEWS: Right. Lets get our main shit. Compatibility between the pair is really low - lower than even the team seems to see. And yer old fart of a Hag here’s gotta use my personal suffering as an example because thats what the cool kids do, right? Their friendship compatibility is high. VERY high. But low for love. HEALTHY love. In terms of convo flow, it only has a river when insults are flying, otherwise Husk actively cuts Angel short or outright annoys him. In reality, someone like Husk would gross out Angel, but the cute cat look can turn that the fuck around - JUST the look. Fans and the team oddly think it’s cute though. Yes, I remember being negged at the bar and thinking “BOY arent my pants flooded like the fuckin planet when the ice caps are melting”. There’s no click. Theres infatuation and lust one sided based on looks. Husk isnt even remotely interested and no means delayed yes apparently. Angel as a rape VICTIM should know better than to blur consent like this. Angel isnt a rapist [for the skim reading raging stans ANGELS NOT A RAPIST, YAAAAAY!] but he sure has a shit grip on when he’s looking like Val when Val forced Angel into a kiss by not accepting rejection. It’s. CREEPY. Its fuckin weird. Husk is literally named after being a shell of his former self, I doubt random sex and forced interest is gonna make him spring to life like bastard Zeberdy from the Magic Pissin Roundabout. Honestly, sexual harassment and addictions are treated the same in this - a joke. A punchline. A gag. Sure makes me fuckin gag. Nah, the more healthier Chaggie relationship (needs work on Charlies damn part - dont let freaky taxidermy men sexually assault your life partner like that) is booooring, lets focus on sexual harassment leading to true love like all the other shitty romcoms shall we? Or sugar coat it with ‘getting to know them better <3′ like Beauty and the Beast. A story, by yours truly: My mom’s mates with this woman. Lets call her M because her name starts with an M. M is just like Angel except slightly older, overweight and disabled - so not everyones cup of tea visually (shes neither here nor there to me imo, not like I hold interest in shaggin her). Like Angel, she fuckin flirts with any ANY man around her. She’ll even touch without consent, rub allllll up and down their backs and bodies, and not leave them alone. She even did this with a few gay men. Shes not a horrible person BUT mom and I are constantly trying to stop her and get through her head how DISGUSTING this treatment is. But nothing gets the message across. Shes ALWAYS talking men and sex and has an on/off fling with this one bloke (dont worry, hes the male M, cheats and does the same as her). Everyone, even women, are uncomfortable with this. Irl it’s desperate and a HUGE repellent. Men are visibly SO uncomfortable. She does it to my father too who is - in case youd forgotten - MARRIED TO HER BEST. FUCKING. FRIEND. My father is not a man of fear (and interestingly, hes one of the real life Huskers I know!) but this woman? *insert Heavy bc why tf not* She scares him. My dad does everything in his damn power to pull away, reject, resist, avoid and cut her off. The only reason hes even nice to her at all is because mom likes her (when M isnt a gross hornbag, shes genuinely a good friend to my mother - much like angel and Cherri). My dad’s strictly banned from insulting her or telling her to fuck off from my mother BECAUSE of her nature with him. Even at her non horny times, he’s even said shes not his flavour.  I’ve had numerous accounts like this myself (ask any woman-) but the worst was the guy thinking - THINKING - that Id eventually be his whilst he played up a lot of our similarities up, seemed nice and I actually thought I had a good guy friend (put it this way, Im genuinely scared of men because of guys like this). At this time, there was a character I discovered who looks and behaves SO much like me, and shes married. My simping arse for this fictional BEAUT [Im sorry but Iris is fucking awesome] compared her romantic traits towards Olgerd as something Id do - and this was a STATUS. It wasnt even too him, tagging him, nothing. I was just spamming Iris like the Iris whore I am, and... Yep. Ill be honest and say that God only knows what else I did that made him think I was ready to rip off my clothes and shag him. My post history back then showed Im like this when I find a character I relate to. I also send hearts a lot publicly and to friends to express joy - I get NERVOUS how that’ll be taken now. He tried to pit my ex friend and I against each other for him and even cyberstalked us pretending to be a girl named Raven. My GUT told me this aint no bastard ‘Raven’. The vibes he gave me, and the fact when I kept saying no he took it as a delayed yes (He even said “Ill wait for when youre ready” not “I understand and am happy to still be friends”) gave me literal nightmares of this guy tracking me down and raping me. He’s currently dating that ex friend (I was still willing to be their friend and support them but they said it was hard to keep us separate in her lifes and she didnt want conflict, so I cut it off amicably with her and I fuckin hope he treats her right. I even sensed in my gut she’d like him and he’d like her - even that theyd be good together! But then I found she was 17 and he was 10 years older, that he was cyberstalking and pitting us against each other, that he was secretly an arrogant fuck and that he gives off red flags like her ex’s - but shes passed 18 now and I want to trust her as an adult that she can deal with this. Shes got a good family.) As a kid, Ive been fuckin groped at school in my shitty neighbourhood. One kid even harassed me wanting to know if Id started my periods yet. Hed constantly fondle girls and ‘keg’ them aka yank down their skirts or trousers in public, and 2 years later held a fucking KNIFE to my throat in a classroom with the shittiest substitute teacher, all because I stood up to him (I was not known for my bravery at school so). He was harassing my female friend who suffers from it since as well as her upbringing, bullying her and stealing her stuff. Shes TINY. She was bullied just as bad as I - who was somehow both the school ghost AND pariah somehow- - and I stepped in and told him to cut that shit out before snatching her things back. I told her to ignore the desperate prick. Thats when he took a boxcutter and held it to my throat, threatening me to keep my head down. Now my neighbourhood fucking qualifies as the British ‘hood’ but Id been lucky to avoid this. Ironically, I wondered what this situation would be like a year prior. Im convinced I can fucking foresee bad shit now and with anxiety that aint good. I froze mentally and I just said “Wooow, Im fucking scared- *friends name*, ignore him” and continued my work. I fucking mentally kicked myself for speaking but I genuinely didnt know what to do. Obviously not fucking that. He sat the full TWO HOURS at our table with this knife, jolting forward mockingly and switching who he pointed it at. The knife btw was from that very room as it was graphics and art. Teacher didnt even notice though honestly Ive had an entire class throw shit at me and call me a whore and the teacher in that class looked at me and TURNED AWAY. End of the day, I reported it to my actual graphics teacher when he returned and he told me he’d take this higher up and to get my parents. My home was only 5 minutes away but I had to walk alone when most the students were gone AND through a fucking alleyway. I always walked with my head low but that day I kept it high and tried to look brave because I genuinely thought he was waiting for me. That he was going to rape and kill me because he’s a pervert and Id just discovered a fucking violent one at that. I broke down at my door. Do you know how fuckin hard it is to look your parents who are dealing with two cancer patients and other issues in the eyes and tell them their ‘little girl’ had a knife to her through for standing up for herself? We went back, I described everything and even remember the yellow-orange handle just to get this kid punished? I even wrote an official police statement (well, the written witness account they add to their statement and evidence) and had to speak on mine and my friend’s behalf because she was that shook up. I never even used to speak for myself! He got expelled, but yknow what us jolly folk dealt with? Hearing kids and his mates mumbling about the ‘rat’ and how much of a cunt they were. Teachers and kids praise him for his art skills and even pin them on display EVERYWHERE (one - ONE - was a fucking self portrait and none of the staff seemed to find issue in that) and even an occassion where he came back into the school when he legally wasnt (trespassing). Do you know how hard it is to fucking avoid someone without raising suspicions from everyone around you in a narrow corridor? Im TALL too. I got NO support from this and felt on edge because he could easily sneak into school. I couldnt say shit because his stupid ‘spies’ were about. Just typing this is upsetting enough- I also know a rl Angel who’s like him minus the sexual harassment. She’s... I never used to like her and visa versa but we actually get along really well now, even though she can be creepy and perverse- But she wouldnt be my type either nor I with her. Often we really fuck each other off but we can also bond great. Another incident reminds me of Husk’s candid photo. Ive had people keep my photo despite me saying not to however I had someone SOMEHOW at that school one the fuck up that. There was a cut out from a magazine of a lady who looked like my DOUBLE except she was asian. Now I thought this was cool and it made me feel sorta pretty. This one girl showed everyone and the teacher, pretty much everyone was like “Oh shit that really is you, C!” and it was harmless fun at first. Until I wanted the picture. Again, this woman looked EXACTLY like me. Yet this girl refused and said she wanted to keep it and even carried it around in her pencil case. Yes it wasnt me but due to the similarities, this photo was called me (tbf the fuckin pic got more respect than I did-). This isnt the only creepy instant between me and this girl but the photo reminds me of it. And this tops people keeping photos OF me which happened in primary school. This was me but legal at that time. And asain. It was super fucking neckbeardy the way she treated this photo and stared, often stroking it and looking at me. I just hope she was only trying to scare me. Theres one final instance of a sexual assault but Im just not yet ready to be public about it. 2 here already know. Those are some of my rl experiences and more to come (unfortunately) that show these behaviours in real life. It seems - it comes across - that sexual harassment, MORE SO TOWARDS MEN, is seen as some punchline and not something legitimately horrifying or dangerous. It’s not cute. It’s fucking FAR from it.  Ive already mentioned how putting two addicts together can lead to relapsing, dependence on each other in an unhealthy way. And Ive even mentioned what Angel needs in a relationship in the RD post. Luckily for you, I’ll copy and paste it here: “ We need to think about where both are mentally. What benefits would a relationship give both? How would they be good and bad for each other? For Al, aside from his outdated views and being a fucking murderer and narcissist, he actually seems in a good mindspace for a relationship IF he opted to be in one. Angel however has a very immature mindset, likewise is in a phase of life where hes bed hopping. IF he were to be in a relationship, I’d say he needs a male equivalent of Cherri - someone with a similar mindset yet some differences, willing to have fun and in touch with their younger side, down to cuddle, open to share and receive love as well as not afraid to publicly be affectionate with him, someone who sees him as more than just for sex, someone fun, someone who’ll let him embrace his cutesy side publicly without shame - Cherri is younger so maybe someone who’s his age or slightly younger perhaps? I think Angel’s not retirement home ready to settle and needs someone on his level that can cuddle and chill as well as feels free and youthful enough to go wild with him. In one sense, he’s got a teen girl sorta mindset (dont put him with a teen though, it’s fuckin weird-). He needs someone positive and raw, someone to let him be himself as well as someone comfortable to be themselves around him. He has a habit of latching onto unobtainable men (in psychology, this is self sabotaging subconsciously): Travis the client, Val a pimp, Husk (emotionally unavailable and needs HEAVY self work - interestingly far more than Angel - plus he’s still onto his last relationship and an addict to gambling and alcohol), Pent who’s the enemy he was currently fighting (inappropriate timing), Alastor who’s not interested in another but his own needs [selfish, VERY bad for a relationship]. Subconsciously he’s self sabotaging on purpose. There’s many psychology books as well as sources online for this, if you’re interested. Either way, Angel is drawn to men either like his father [who dislike him, shun him, or are otherwise cold, abusive or just blatantly dislike or otherwise dont care about him] or anyone with money to fuel his drug addiction/’debt’ to Val. Going with any of these men isn’t a good idea. Preferably, Angel needs someone who he doesnt immediately crush and obsess over. Someone who he doesnt sexually harass or assault. Someone he can build a connection with quickly that can bud into romance (think how Chaggie started as a friendship which clicked immediately). Maybe even someone he doesn’t expect to fall for but does so anyways. It would be more realistic as Viv wants as well as more healthy. That for once he isnt sex or money craved instantly, thus doesnt sexually harass/assault and is given a proper chance to develop and grow a friendship and love. Someone who isnt an addict. Someone with an on-par mindset where they click. Someone open to love. For any chance of a good relationship, Angel needs to be with anyone BUT who we’ve already seen. There’s too much toxicity that’ll be swept under the rug and justified otherwise. Too much shit to fuel homophobes in terms of gay stereotypes. Even though Ive focused a fair bit on Angel, it’s NOT just about Angel. That’s something fans forget. Some he depends on or someone who depends on him in the long term wont last and will be very dangerous to both. Just because you suffer, you dont then deserve to be rewarded with ‘something nice’. You dont get to have everything youve ever wanted. Giving him any of these blokes [minus Val] gives him a pass. Gives him what he wants. I get Viv loves him but life doesnt work that way. True lasting growth comes from learning that. Acceptance and growth. You dont get everything you want and sometimes thats a GOOD thing. He’s not a spoilt kid who gets everything he asks for, he’s YOUR creation. If you really wanted what your creations deserve then you need to research and be realistic with it. Because hes starting to feel like a shitty Gary-Stu at this rate.” Sorry for that copypaste clusterfuck. Copy paste is not my forte lol Now Husk. Remember Big? Probably not after the info overload, but if you do GREAT. Big needed love, patience, understanding, someone who could help him, someone who understood and respected his boundaries. I spent so much damn time and now he cuddles up and exposes his tummy because I make him feel understood, loved and safe. He NEVER purred or meowed (why would he need to meow when he didnt speak to humans?) but now he does. He lives on the streets of a neighbourhood with rough folk. He used to draw blood and go rabid on my arms. But I was patient and showed him that I understood his reasons but that he was safe with me and had no need to strike out. I never pushed his boundaries let alone doing it multiple times (the rl angel I know is fucking skilled at pushing cat’s boundaries and wonders why they all huddle up to me and avoid her lol). Husk is an unavailable man. Romantic/Sexual love does NOT heal his wounds. But thats the only thought fans and the team have given on his side. He needs love to ‘fix’ him. The WORST reason to get with someone. Theyre not a project and you arent a fucking miracle worker. Treat them as an equal. He needs a good friend. JUST a friend. Like Big, he needs patience, trust, understanding, and extensive help (arguably more intense than Angel’s). He needs to love himself a bit more FIRST. Someone who respects his boundaries INSTANTLY. Someone relatable and similar, open to love not just sex and not as troubled (if they are, they need to handle it way better, healthily and overall be in a good mindspace). Viv can ship whatever the fuck tickles her fancy, but once your passion project becomes public and funded, you have set responsibilities on how to address and handle sensitive issues as well as having to accept criticism. If Husk goes sober in the name of love (ESPECIALLY with the guy not respecting his boundaries and sexually harassing him), then it’s a fucking INSULT to alcoholics.  I know a few rl Husks but there’s one that anyone who knows me enough knows the man I hold closest to my heart was an alcoholic and spitting of Husk. That’s why Husk’s character means so much to me. But there’s only 2 here who know a bit more of this man. This is something Id hoped to not share so soon, nor as messy. And Im already getting waterworks because this is FAR from easy. I guess Husk became the very thing *I* needed in order to face this. This man was my grandfather. WAS. I cant even fucking accept that. I was a fucking child. I feel stupid being so open about this over some stupid cartoon but it just shows the real life effects this has on REAL fucking people. This man was old and lonely. Always at the pubs. He taught me card games, card tricks and card magic as well as one of his own sons dealing with a gambling addiction. I feel so fucking stupid crying about this- I dont want to open up but its the only way I feel I can get people to understand my side in all of this. This man was a fucking MESS. A closed off, lonely, grumpy old bastard. He lost his love because of his alcohol addiction and never found love again. Never got over that woman. (Shes still kicking and we’re close - im keeping some things under wraps between them as its not my place). Gave up on life and love. Worked hard at his fixation on cards and puzzles, as well as crass jokes and knowledge. But he was very lazy otherwise. Bitter and angry. And you know what? He was my world. I love this man with every fiber of my being because he was the first person to love and accept me for me. He treated me as an equal and helped me grow as a person. In fact... He was only ever happy around us kids. He had hope again. Protected me. He used to hate gays and blacks and you know what? He taught HIMSELF as to why that was shitty thinking. He taught ME about differences in people and to accept it. He taught me that you dont always have to understand to accept. He taught me poker and... swears admittedly. He was a beautiful soul that was broken inside. He needed to love himself. But you know what actually fucking happened? You know what I watched as a kid? I watched as he smoked until every morning he woke throwing up phlegm just to BREATHE. I watched as sometimes the light in his eyes died and through smoke breaks and early drinking how he’d sometimes slip and show me his pain. And we’d have deep talks about it and the world and everything. How alcohol ruined his life yet he craved it. His scent. I remember arguments I wasnt supposed to overhear and growing up seeing him fucking DIE slowly in a hospital bed. The man he was ended up as a fucking husk. His skin was bloated and purple, he was half machine on how much shit he was hooked up to. How he was barely a man at all. He was dying of cancer and he fucking knew and never told us. His cancer meds gave him horrid hallucinations. And I practically spent most of my time in that hospital because TWO people had cancer. Two stunning people had fucking stupid bastard cancer. He was a fuck up. He was flawed to shit. But seeing glimpses of the real him was a fucking ethereal experience. He made me feel like a PERSON. And all we could do in the end was watch him just die. He WANTED to die and you could see it but hed only eat around us to fake fight out of his own hubris and not wanting to let us down. That year, I watched 2 of the only people who ever gave a shit about me die the most dishonourable deaths God could have gave them. Years prior I watched his son gamble EVERYTHING away - his lover, his house, his everything. Hes a moderate gambler now with a partner who never had a history of any addiction. She helps keep him in line as he helps her. But most nights I fucking dream of this shit. I cant even think about my hero because I fucking weep. I still have nightmares. Im still up thinking how I could have saved him from himself when it’s him who was the only one able to. I have to live my life with those memories and I was just a kid. Im a full woman and Im still haunted by it. Even that year is blasphemy and I fucking hate it. I want to take him in my arms, hold him and tell him he’s enough. That its ok and he can get through this. Anything that reminds me of him, I love because I know the other side. The real side. The side not tethered to vices. When I see people like that, I pray they see themselves like that too and I want to help them see it. Tell them that they can live again. It’s better than fucking decaying in a hospital bed. That when people make this sorta shit into a cute quirk it’s not. And it’s dickheads like me who have actually seen it play in the real world to REAL people they love. They arent a fucking accessory to fix for your own narrative. They arent a fuckin performing monkey. At least with Rick and Morty it’s kinda humorous and never played for some shitty toxic ship to appeal to everyone who’s never had to face that shit themselves. And Im like my old man but with more hope and no addiction. I drink and I gamble but I’ll never let myself get that low. Because I honour him but Im not as fucking saft. I wont allow it even though it’s a fucking battle. Those addictions are in the blood. My family history. Its always been so fucking normal. I’ll never knock someone for an addiction or try to preach them out of it because theres often pain fueling it, but I’d never encourage it or toxic faux cures and stupid romance promises as some bullshit MLM remedy either. I KNOW it’s fiction but I want people to see the real side. I want VIV to see the real side. Id willingly for FREE fucking sing that shit if it meant spreading a good message. Because this is fucking hell. FIXING IT: The ship’s basis is too set in stone now - too familiar to change. Best is to never let it be canon. Because you know what else it teaches? That rOmAnCe cures all. Not therapy. Not rehab. Not any REAL work. Just fuck and date it all away as if it’s that easy. It’s a mockery! I tried to be professional about this but when the media bombards this shit constantly, the has the AUDACITY to play like it’s giving a good message is salt to the wounds. A kiss with a fist. An old man dont care for the petty teen drama that Angel and Cherri (even fuckin Al) thrive on. Want this to send a good message still? Angel hates rejection and thinks everyone wants him. Have Husk reject him. Especially because no one should go out with someone whos sexually harassed them there. Been there, done that got the fuckin tshirt. Have Husk reject Angel the way Gravity Falls has Wendy reject Dipper. It helped Dipper move on and mature, and this is what Angel needs for growth and to be more humble.  Husk would be a fucking excellent mentor to Angel, a friend and protector, someone who shows him the ropes like Grunkle Stan like a grandfather figure. To not fall for his mistakes. Husk would be a better expert than any of them plus it balances the power dynamtic. It’s healthy and realistic. Touches the topic with the sensitivity it needs. Not everything needs a ship or romance. Wounds healed that way dont stay healed long. Angel seems more fitting as a son like figure, and he can play that dad like role for him. And if any of the team EVER saw this, fucking take this idea. Its YOURS. FREE. FOREVER. If we wanna play this NDA but still reblog some of the story telling arts and have some of our team indulge in it. I wont sue. Fucking TAKE IT if it means doing this shit right because Spindlehorse have beautifully triggered so many different people and their different traumas to please teenagers sexual fantasies, their own kinks and for a jolly good joke.  This is a bastard long read and Ive had to face the traumas again but if good can come from it then I’ll GLADLY dance this duet again. Stans, Antis, dont even TEMPT interaction. You arent brave sending suicide threats behind a screen, youre a coward and a waste of oxygen. I WANT Hazbin and Helluva to succeed. I want Viv and her crew to do well. Trust me, I wouldnt waste my time if I didnt give a shit. Viv is fucking gifted and its being wasted if it’s not at her full potential for the approval of a rabid army of kids and immature adults who dont know any better (stans and antis). I know she would like a good and decent fanbase. Stans and antis arent it. Tagging you folks because it’s long but yall actually helped me have the courage to open my trap to this. Screenshots are coming later though all of what Ive said is easily sourced. But this has been days, Im sick, im tired, ive been upset facing my own traumas. If any tags wanna help then by all means but otherwise. @honesthazbinarchives, @siaesnow​ (also added age still bc despite the lack of physical aging, theres also the mental aspect and experiences as well as power dynamics side to it, in case youre wondering), @noirellearts, @enchantedchocolatebars​, @galemalio​ (thank you for letting me weep like a bitch), @angel-blitz​, @critical-hazbin​, @what-the-hazbin​, @hazboobhotel​, @pineapple-critiques-stuff​, @devils-advocutie​, SORRY AGAIN FOR BEING A LIL BITCH FOLKS, I feel awkward like my teen years but yeah- fuck it Im old and imma rot soon anyways. If this experience can help then Ill be glad.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin critical #anti huskerdust sorry folks #vivienne medrano #criticism #toxic relationships in fiction #how fiction impacts the real world #yeah im a wimp who cares? #hazbin needs to change for the better #concerned fan #dont be another yandev #dont be another yansim #stans and antis dni #stans and antis will be blocked and reported #hope this gives justice to my hero about the rl effects of addiction #rest easy Kiddas got this #still shitting myself #read more wont work sorry

[khoicesbyk]

Beloved.

A/N: I'm officially obsessed with Wolf Bride and what does one do when she's obsessed with a certain book? She writes an AU about it! 😁 So, Talley Ho! *in my Sherlock Holmes voice*

Rated: Mature. | Contains sexual content and strong language. (You know? The usual from me. 😁) | Bolded and/or italicized words are conversations and thoughts of the characters. | Main Characters: Roman (LI) and Naia Evans (MC) | All Characters and names: (except MC and original characters created by me) are property of Pixelberry.

Current Word Count: 2,755 words. (more or less. I stop counting after editing and re-editing. 🤷🏾‍♀️)

Tag List: @rideordiechronicles @shewillreadyou @txemrn @lucy-268 @pixie88 @secretaryunpaid @aussieez @shannonsaid @shannonwrote @queenjilian @bebepac @imturaxamara @texaskitten30 @choicesficwriterscreations

This series is rated Mature. It is NOT reading material that is safe for those under 18. Reader discretion is STRONGLY advised!

This series may contain spoilers. If you wish not to see spoilers, please do not read any further.

(Also this series is a slight deviation of the original story. In the original story, the werewolf hunter is a woman. But in this series the hunter is a man.)

Missing a chapter or want to read a chapter again? I got you covered! Click ——> Here!

If you’d like to be added to my tag list. Just reblog or dm me and I will gladly add you. 😁😘

TW: character death, Car Accident, death of a parent.

Chapter 15.) Skeletons.

It was Saturday but not just your typical Saturday. This was Laurie’s chance to get her daughter the hell outta dodge of the upcoming full moon. While she was having breakfast at Tucker’s with Shane, she was starting to really worry.

“I swear that girl acts more and more like you every day.” Laurie said to her husband.

“Me?! She’s LITERALLY your living, breathing reflection but yeah sure let’s blame me.” He replies while shaking his head.

“If we don’t get her the hell outta here by the next full moon, she will never leave.”

“I know baby. But you know how she is when she sets her mind to something.”

“I wish she’d set her mind to something other than staying here!”

Laurie sighed.

“I’m scared, Shane. I’m really scared. We can’t let her go through what I went through.”

Shane sipped his coffee before reaching over to take his wife’s left hand in his.

“I swear on my momma. We WILL NOT let that happen. She will be leaving with us tomorrow. There will be no arguing about it.”

Laurie smiled softly. After finishing breakfast they stepped out into the sunlight then decided to take a walk down Main Street.

“I haven’t had a chance to ask you but how are you feeling baby?” Shane asked her as they walked.

“Nostalgic. I’ve missed home. And I won’t lie, part of me is glad to see it. But in the same breath, I hate being here.”

“I know baby. We haven’t been here since we left 30 some odd years ago.”

“It’s not just that though.”

“Then what is it? Tell me.”

“Shane…I-I-I can still feel him. I can still see him. I can still hear his voice. He’s still around. Even though he’s dead.”

“I promise you, you’re safe. He’s dead and rightly so. And even if he wasn’t, there is no way in hell I’d let him anywhere near you.”

“My hero.”

“Always baby.”

Shane smiled at her while wrapping his arm around her shoulders. He knew she was struggling and all he wanted to do was take her pain away. As they walked both took in how much the town square had changed. Most of what Laurie knew 30 years ago wasn’t there now.

When they got to the park they sat down on her old favorite bench.

“Remember our first date?” He asked her.

“Yeah. You took me to the old drive in then we came here, sat down on this bench and tried to count as many stars as possible.” She replies.

Shane laid his wife’s head on his left shoulder.

“I know you’re struggling. I know being home is bittersweet.”

He felt tears fall on his shoulder.

“I didn’t think it’d be this hard. I just knew that I’d see this place and I’d hate it as I always have. I didn’t think that I’d miss it so much.” She said as her voice cracked.

“I know baby. Don’t cry. It’s hard to come back here after all this time and not feel anything.”

Shane rubbed her back as she cried.

“It’s okay baby. Let it out. Let it all out.”

When her tears finally subsided, Laurie took a deep breath.

“Thank you.”

Shane kissed the side of her head.

“Always baby.”

Laurie looked up and suddenly had an idea.

“I wanna do something.”

“What baby?” Shane asked.

“…I wanna go see mama and daddy.”

Shane nodded.

After going by Alfred’s flower shop Shane and Laurie drove a little ways out of town to S.R. Timmons National Cemetery. Laurie laid the flowers at the grave of her parents.

Laurie laid her hand on the grave stone with Shane right beside her.

“Hi mama. Hi daddy. I’m home…” she whispered.

It had been 30 years since she’d seen her parents grave.

“I know you’re probably furious that it’s taken me this long to come back. And I wouldn’t blame you if you haunted me for the rest of my life because of it. But I want you to know that…I miss you so much.”

Shane knelt next to his wife as she took a shaky breath.

“I have so much to say but I don’t know where to start. I’m sure you watched it all from heaven but I have to tell you myself. I became a nurse like you were mama. And I found a man that is just as stand up as you were daddy. We got married at a courthouse. I know it probably wasn’t the wedding that you and daddy would’ve hoped for mama but…I wish both of you were there.”

She stopped as her voice hitched.

“Anyway, you have a granddaughter. We named her Naia Michelle. She’s a giant handful but you’d love her nonetheless. Maybe even more than you ever loved me. And your son…well we won’t get into that. But now I need you. I need you to help me bring my baby home. She’s in danger and she won’t listen to me. The wolves here mean her no good. And I’m scared that if she doesn’t leave with us tomorrow, I’ll never see her again. Mama…daddy…I need you.”

She burst into tears with her husband right next to her.

“It’s okay baby. They hear you. I promise, they hear you.”

“I know they do but it’s Naia who doesn’t…” Laurie said through her tears.

Shane took her face into his hands before speaking.

“Look at me baby. Naia will. We will make sure that she will.”

Shane held her close before speaking to the plaque in front of him.

“I never got to meet you two but I met your daughter and I fell head over heels for her. She has made my life better. She gave me the greatest gift in life. She gave me a daughter. Naia is beautiful. She’s smart. She’s talented. She’s strong willed. And God knows that girl is as stubborn as her mother. And now she is determined to stay and I can’t stand it. I need her at home, where she’d be safe. She’s not safe here. If she stays here her mother and I are afraid that she’ll wind up hurt or dead. I can’t have that. So please help us bring our girl home.” The two sat in a somber yet comfortable silence as Laurie reflected on her parents.

“Thank you.”

“For what?” Shane asks her.

“For coming with me. I needed this.” She replies.

“Baby there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

“I think I’m ready now.”

“Are you sure babe?” He asks.

“Yeah. Besides we still need to get our girl and get out of here. But it was good to see mama and daddy.” She replies.

“Alright. Let’s go. We have a long afternoon ahead of us.”

Meanwhile Naia was sitting at the bar with her laptop open at Buck’s showing Layla her nursery design.

“What do you think?” Naia asked Layla.

“I LOVE IT! It’s beautiful!” Layla replies.

“And it’s neutral. Just the way you like it.”

“Thank you so much Naia! I can’t wait to show Callum.”

“You think he’ll like it?” Naia asks.

“Trust me if I like it then he’ll like it.” She replies.

“And here I thought wolves were supposed to be the dominant ones.”

Layla snickered.

“I know that’s a dig at Roman.”

“It’s not a dig! It’s a smartass observation.”

“If you say so…”

“I do say so!” Naia said emphatically.

The two giggled just as Callum walked in.

“Hello girls.” He said to them.

“Heyyyyy!” They replied.

“What are you two up to?” He asks.

“Naia was showing me her design ideas for the baby’s nursery. Here take a look.” Layla replied.

Callum studies the design.

“Well what do you think?” Layla asks him.

“Very nice. I like it. I think it’s perfect for the baby.” He replies.

Naia’s jaw dropped.

“Told you!” Layla teased her.

“You must have some kinda mind control over him.”

“Yeah I do. It’s called the munchkin in my stomach.”

Naia shook her head and smirked.

“Are you ready to go love?” He asks Layla.

“Yeah I’m ready. You coming Naia?” She replies.

“Not quite yet. I’m gonna run by my uncle’s house first so I’ll see you later.”

“Okay. And thank you again Naia.” Callum said to her.

“You’re welcome. As for you young lady, we got baby shopping to do!”

“My favorite pastime!”

They shared a laugh before leaving the bar. When Naia got back to her uncle’s place, she was met by her parents who were sitting at the kitchen table looking through an old photo album.

“I didn’t think you two would still be here.”

“Is it Sunday?” Shane asks.

“Nope.” She replies.

“Then we’re still here.” Laurie said to her.

“Where’s uncle Zane?” Naia asks.

“In the shower.” Shane replied.

“Then how’d you two get in the house?” Naia asked.

“I still have a key, Naia. You forget I grew up in this house.” Laurie replies.

“Touché. What’s that?” Naia asks.

“Family album.” Laurie replies.

“Can I see?” Naia asks.

“Have a seat.” Laurie replies.

Naia sat next to her mother and looked at the page of old photos.

“Are these two your parents?” Naia asked, pointing to the couple.

“Yes. That’s mama and daddy, right after they got married in Parkersburg.” Laurie replied.

“They’re beautiful.”

“Thank you.”

“They were amazing.” Zane said as he came into the kitchen.

“Yes they were. Daddy built this house with his own two hands.”

“Really?” Naia asks.

“Yup. He was a carpenter. He could build you a mansion out of a mound of dirt.” Laurie replies.

“And what about your mother?” Naia asks.

“She was a nurse.” Laurie replies with a smile.

“So is that why you became a nurse mom?” Naia asks.

“Yes. I wanted to be just like her.” Laurie replies.

“What were their names?” Naia asks.

“Susanna and Lewis. Mama’s maiden name was Wright.” Laurie replies.

“I wish I could’ve met them.”

“They would’ve loved you. Probably would’ve spoiled you rotten if they had gotten the chance.”

“You mean like how they used to do you?” Zane asked.

“They did not spoil me!” Laurie protested.

“Ha! They all but neglected me when you were born.”

“Can you blame them?” Laurie asked.

“Yes I can! I was here long before you were thought of!” Zane replied.

“Somebody sounds jealous.” Laurie teased.

“Me? Jealous? Of you?” Zane asked his sister.

“Yes. You’re jealous. You always have been.” Laurie replies.

“Such a diva!”

“Now that we can agree on!” Shane quipped.

“What were your parents like?” Naia asked.

Zane contorted his face to do an impression of their father.

“Simon! Watch your sister! You know she can’t go wandering off into the woods by herself!”

Laurie snickered.

“Jackass!”

“Thank you! I’ll be here all week.”

“I didn’t know your name is Simon, uncle Zane.”

Zane chuckled.

“Yes. Simon Zane Roberts. I was named after my mother. And your mother was named after papa. Somehow Laurie Michelle is the same as Lewis Michael.”

“Semantics.”

Laurie turned to the next page to a newspaper clipping. The headline took Naia by surprise.

Naia looked over at her mother who was pale.

“Mama?” Naia asks.

Laurie’s hand was trembling.

“Baby are you okay?” Shane asked.

“I…I…this…” she tried to say.

Zane put his hand over his sister’s.

“It’s okay squirt.”

“You kept it?” She asked in a whisper.

“Yes. I couldn’t throw it out. I didn’t know how to.” Zane replied.

Laurie looked haunted as she ran her hand over the newspaper clipping.

“It…it…was my fault…”

“What?” Naia asked her mother.

“The accident…it was my fault…” her mother replied clearly haunted.

“Squirt…it wasn’t your fault. And you know it wasn’t!” Zane spoke up.

“The state fair…daddy and mama were taking me…it was an early birthday present…if they hadn’t they’d still be alive.”

“Mama what happened?” Naia asks.

“I don’t remember.” Laurie replies.

“I do.” Zane said quietly.

“You do?” Naia asks.

Zane sat across from his sister.

“Yes. Mama, papa and squirt were coming back from the state fair in Huntington…when he lost control of his car and hit a tree then flipped over. Papa died on impact and mama…she died at the hospital.”

“I thought she died in the crash too…” Laurie said to her brother.

“No the truth is she died at the hospital. I told you that she died in the crash because I couldn’t bring myself to take you to her when you woke up. She was brain dead and I had to make the decision to take her off life support.”

“What do you mean when mama woke up?” Naia asked.

“According to what the police told me, squirt was sleeping in the backseat. They thought she was dead too until she woke up crying for mama before passing out again.” Zane replied.

“I don’t remember any of that.”

“Of course you don’t. You were 4.”

“How old were you uncle Zane?” Naia asked.

“I had just turned 17, 2 weeks before the accident.” Zane replied.

“Why weren’t you with them?” Shane asks.

“I was staying with Toby Robinson and his family that weekend. Toby and I were fishing when Toby’s dad came to get us. He said he was taking me to the hospital because of the accident.” Zane replied.

“If you were 17 when your parents died how were you and mama able to stay here?” Naia asks.

“Mama’s aunt Henrietta who lived in Parkersburg came to stay with us until I turned 18. That’s when I was old enough to buy the house. Thankfully it didn’t cost that much back then.” Zane replied.

Laurie just stared at the newspaper clipping.

“Mama?” Naia asks.

“We went to see them…” Laurie replies.

“You and daddy?” Naia asked.

“Yes. Your mother wanted to see them, so we went.” Shane replied.

“I didn’t think I’d ever go back.”

“You went back before I did.” Zane said to his sister.

“What do you mean?” Laurie asked Zane.

“I stopped going to visit mama and papa about 15 years ago.” He replies.

“Why?” Laurie asks her brother.

“Because I figured that they were tired of hearing me beg.” He replied.

“Beg for what?” She asked. Her tone was suddenly short.

“I used to beg them to bring you home. Every year on the anniversary of the accident and their birthdays, I would pray and beg them to send you home.” He replies.

“I’m sure you were miserable.” Laurie said to her brother.

“I was. I really truly was.”

“Good. Serves you right.” Laurie said before closing the photo album and handing it to her brother.

“Keep it. There’s not much that I can do with it.” Zane said to her.

“I don’t want it. That’s why I didn’t take it or any of what’s left of mama’s jewelry when I left.” Laurie replies.

“You can’t just forget it, squirt.”

“Do not call me that. You lost the right to call me that 36 years ago.”

Zane set the photo album on the counter.

“How long are you going to continue to punish me, Laurie?” He asks.

“Until you are lying in the grave next to them.” She replied.

“Mom!”

“No it’s fine, sweetie. I guess this is what I get for letting my sister back into my home.” Zane said to Naia.

“Correction: this is MY home. Because last time I checked, you signed ownership of this house to me when you decided to gamble your entire life away and couldn’t pay back your debts!” Laurie sneered at her brother.

“Enough! I don’t know what’s going on between you two but this isn’t the time or place.” Naia said, trying to keep the peace between them.

“You’re right baby. Besides, I'm done with this place. It’s going up for sale first thing in the morning.”

Zane’s eyes went wide.

“You can’t be serious!” Zane said in a panicked tone.

“As a heart attack.” Laurie replied coolly.

Zane sighed heavily.

“I understand that you are angry with me and that you probably hate me but Laurie please! You can’t just sell the only home I have ever known!”

“I hate it for you but this place has got to go!”

“Laurie for the love of God, not even you can be that damn cruel!”

Laurie’s eyes blazed with unbridled fury.

“Watch…me!” Laurie hissed before turning on her heels and walking outside with Shane right behind her.

Naia was completely stunned while Zane was utterly heartbroken and dejected.

#choices #choices stories you play #pixelberry #khoicesbyk #choices fanfiction #fanfic #wolf bride

[hydra-collector]

Suck Me Out

Ships: Intrulogical, some Intruloceit

Characters: Remus Sanders, Logan Sanders, Janus Sanders (minor character), Roman Sanders (minor character), Virgil Sanders (minor character), Patton Sanders (minor character)

TW: Self-harm, choking, autoerotic asphyxation (not really though), depression, self-deprecation, I don’t want to spoil but if any of those previous tags bother you even a little, I suggest you don’t read this (I’ll tag the spoiler, though), cursing

Words: 1,716

Summary: Remus wouldn't expect them to understand. He's intrusive thoughts, god of kinks. Of course they wouldn't see it. But once in a while he wished they would.

"I'm serious, Logan," Remus gestured to his tightly adorned garment, "necktie."

Logan rolled his eyes at his boyfriend. "When you're done with your kinks, join us for movie night. We finally get to watch a documentary."

Remus shrugged and pulled tighter the pretty blue tie that had previously been on Logan's neck. His face was purple from the cutoff of blood and his hand struggled to keep grip. He began to tilt backwards a little towards the wall before Logan took his arm and pried away the tie.

"Remus, stop. You're gonna fall."

"But it feels so good."

Logan only sighed in response and reclaimed the tie around his own neck, leading Remus to the living room. 

Roman was the first to speak out of the welcoming mumbles.

"Remus, save your arousal for night time. We're trying to watch a fun movie about space," though he seemed skeptical of the amount he could enjoy a documentary.

Patton scolded the two of them for mentioning such subjects, but swiftly put on the movie anyway. 

Virgil and Roman became surprisingly enamored in the science of black holes and their possible opposite, white holes. Logan excitedly paused it at multiple points to fawn over or elaborate on some of the research like a child. Remus, however, sat leaning against Logan, staring mindlessly at the television.

What if I was in a black hole? 

Remus tried to shake the thought off, but it was persistent. 

If black holes lead to white ones that spit you out into another universe, could my world here end? 

Maybe he'd be happy in this other universe. Something in his brain would change and the sadness would be gone. Or maybe it'd be traumatic. 

"...Remus!"

"Huh?"

"I paused the movie to see if you were alright. You did not seem to notice when I did."

"Yeah, I'm, I'm fine. Think I'll just…" mumbling off something about the bathroom. 

The minute he left he felt lonely. And stupid. Lonely and stupid. He shouldn't have let them see that. Now Logan's gonna be concerned because there's obviously something wrong. He stared intently at the mirror. 

Ugly. They hate me. 

What if he said that to them? He'd be guilt-tripping them and he'd be a terrible person. Even thinking it , he's a terrible person. Die.

His arms flashed to his neck, grabbing as tight as possible. His balance began failing… 

No, he can't do that. Then he worries them and they don't need that. How does he even know death is better than this?

Thomas doesn’t need him. Thomas doesn’t want him. His mental health would be better if he never even existed. Thomas doesn’t deserve what he does.

I want to fix that.

He can't help but cry. Muffled shrieks that must sound like moans from the living room. Sharp breaths that must sound like enjoyment slip out. Hits to his arms and legs that only add to the many bruises sound disgusting to them.

But none of it is. 

Sure, they have good reason to believe that Remus has some kinks, he is indeed mostly intrusive thoughts, which he’d admit is related to kinks, but he half-wished they wouldn't assume. He didn't really want them to know, but it killed him to be constantly alone about it. 

Alone.

Forever alone.

Logan, Patton, Roman, and Virgil. They’re the “light sides.” Of course he’s happy Janus got accepted, but… he doesn’t get that. He probably never will.

Fuck it. 

He tiptoed his way to his bedroom, ceiling adorned with a hook in preparation. On a day easier than this, he’d drilled it for today. Under his bed sat a box holding the rope, paper, and pen he’d carefully hidden. He thanked his previous self.

Tying the noose, his ears kept open for visitors wondering where he was. Before he hung himself at last, he wrote.

I’m sorry. 

Patton, Virgil, I love you. Janus, I love you. My brother, I love you. And Logan. I love you. Thank you for caring. 

But it wasn’t a kink.

He questioned if he should refer to Roman as his brother, and decided at last to do it. He didn’t want to alienate him as he died. He’d never get to tell him again.

I’m glad this is the end. I wasn’t needed.

He kicked the chair from under him.

Thomas will be happier without me.

As the rope constricted, relief and fear washed over him.

They all will.

“Remus!”

--

His throat hurt.

“Remus?”

He then noticed he could see a face. A beautiful face.

Logan?

“L-”

As soon as he tried to speak, his throat stopped him. Logan took his cheek in comfort.

“It’s okay, Remus. We found you. You’re going to be okay.”

He looked around to find he was sitting on his soft bed, pillows piled behind his head. The rope, and the hook were both gone. A drill, that had presumably been used to remove the hook, sat on the far dresser.

“We found your note.” It was Roman this time.

“I’m so sorry we ever thought it was a kink. We should have talked to you.” Logan’s eyes were gazing prettily at Remus’s.

“-”

He was reminded he couldn’t speak, so pointed to the paper on which his note was, and made a writing motion. Logan soon obliged to his wishes, though getting a different paper. Remus began to write. Again.

You had good reason to think it was.

He smiled a bit, and would have laughed, when Roman and Logan read this. They didn’t seem as amused as he was, and only looked worried. He flailed his arms to get the paper back.

Y’all don’t understand my sense of humor.

Where’s everyone else?

Logan beckoned to the door and Janus, Virgil, and Patton came in. Seeing Janus’s scales, his beautiful face… he never did get to ask him out.

Janus.

Logan brought him over while Remus wrote his message.

Probably not the best time, but I’d like to take this opportunity to tell you that both me and Logan have a crush on you.

“What?”

His human side grew red. Someone, who you like, who’s just attempted suicide telling you they want to date you is a very odd feeling.

“Remus, what did you-” Logan attempted to look at his message to Janus, and immediately shut up when he saw it.

Can I talk to Virgil now?

Virgil had been snickering in his corner, seemingly able to read the paper. He stopped as soon as he was called, putting on a more serious face.

Sorry Janus pushed you down the stairs.

“Wh- you’re not going to say some sad thing about me leaving the dark sides and you getting depressed? Just apologizing for Janus?”

I’m not going to blame it on you. It was Janus who pushed you down the stairs. And my idea.

“I’d call you an asshole but you’ve just attempted suicide and this is your daily personality.”

Remus made peace signs before requesting to talk to Patton, who unsurprisingly apologized over and over for treating Remus like a piece of shit. He did need to apologize, but Remus knew he was making an effort. Even if it wasn’t going very well.

Hey Ro-Ro, my bro-bro.

Roman also apologized. 

I mean we were literally split for you to be the “good” brother and me to be the “bad” one. If anything that made it the worst.

Roman had nothing to do but give him a hug.

Logan,

could I have a kiss?

Logan smiled and kissed Remus lightly on the cheek. He was pretty sure it wasn’t a good idea to kiss someone on the lips if they’d been frothing at the mouth. 

That was tiny!

He would have gone to cuddle and kiss Remus more if no one else had been there. For now, Remus hugged everyone individually until they dispersed. 

Thankfully, Logan was put on watch duty, to make sure Remus really was feeling better, as he seemed, and wouldn’t try anything.

Logan pressed kisses to Remus’s forehead, cheeks, and nose. His warmth bled onto Remus, who desperately needed it. Logan’s eyes were beautiful. His arms wrapped around him. He felt safe. Remus snuggled into the affection, nearly happy he’d attempted suicide and been found. But-

He picked up the pen and paper again, reluctant to let go.

Logan, what if I did that because I wanted attention?

“Hey, Remus, no. You did it because everyone’s been against you. It’s made you feel like you don’t matter. But you do. We need you. Even if you did because of attention, it was because you needed attention. It’s okay if you wanted attention. If you were willing to go to… those lengths just to get attention, you needed it.”

Logan

thank y-

Remus’s eyes filled with bittersweet tears before he managed to finish writing, and he clutched Logan tight. He let go again to tell him more.

I felt so horrible. I still feel so horrible. I’m sorry I acted so happy when I wasn’t. I know you care but I shouldn’t be here. All I do is hurt Thomas. Now I’ll hurt him even more because I failed. He’s going to feel like shit. I’d pull out my own organs and put them in my horrible person pile if I could. It would have been okay if I’d succeeded. I’m so sorry if you would’ve missed me, but I can’t keep hurting Thomas. If I would’ve died he would have been fine, but I failed so-

Remus sobbed into Logan’s arms again, laying as close as possible, feeling his warmth, his body as much as possible. His boyfriend rubbed his hand over his back, arms, through his hair. He was starting to cry a little as well. He felt so horrible that he hadn’t helped how Remus felt.

“Remus, if a part of Thomas died, he’d have a piece of himself missing. It may not seem like Thomas wants or needs you, but you’re a part of him nonetheless.”

What do I do?

“Remus,” Logan turned his boyfriend’s face gently to look him in the eyes, “all you need to do is stay alive.”

What if I can’t?

“I'll be with you. As long as you need. You stay alive as long as you can.”

#sanders sides #sanders side fic #remus sanders #logan sanders #intrulogical #intruloceit #ts remus #ts logan #deceit sanders #janus sanders #ts deceit #ts janus #roman sanders #ts roman #virgil sanders #ts virgil #patton sanders #ts patton #HERES THE TRIGGER WARNING: #tw suicide #sucide attempt #tw suicide attempt #tw self harm #tw kink #think thats it #grays fics

[t-dartagnan]

beasts of prey | 1/1, 2,105 words

there are five things bautista learns about the warden.

[pre-greenwarden, a different take on bautista]

relationships: pre warden/marc bautista

characters: nb!warden (saren pendragon, goes by they/them), m!bautista

tags&tw: mental illness, nightmares, panic attacks, self-harm, description of injury, unhealthy coping mechanisms, lowercase, bautista POV

the first thing you learn about pendragon is that they’re frustrating.

frustrating in a way that gets on your nerves, that makes you uneasy, that makes you angry. it’s not a fleeting thought, and that’s what bothers you the most; it’s a constant presence, the anger that simmers under your skin and crawls up your throat when they drawl yet another dry teasing, when they make your work harder than it strictly needs to be. they’re not cooperative, don’t even try to be ― they’re made of sharp words and ruthless wit, an unrelenting need to push back even when they have absolutely no reason to do so, no reason to argue, to press, to hurt.

that’s what they’re trying to do, isn’t it? to hurt? what for, is the answer you’ll never get. why. because this isn’t normal, is it? this isn’t common. you’ve dealt with people who were hard to please, before, you’ve dealt with entitled assholes and whatnot ― but there’s something different here, something you can’t pinpoint, something you don’t understand.

you don’t know what it is, and, in a certain way, you don’t even want to.

  the second thing you learn about pendragon is that they’re terrifyingly good at what they do.

you’ve worked with people who were good at what they did, of course you did ― people have strengths and weakness that oftentimes balance each other out, and it’s not hard to find some resemblance of harmony. problem is: nothing is ever easy when pendragon’s around, and you had been naive to think this would be like any other interaction.

they know where things are ― where to look, which direction to take, what to uncover. you’re not enough of a fool to ignore the way they always go directly over wherever it is that the fresh clues are, the reminders, the path ― guided by an invisible hand or pulled towards it, you muse you’ll never know.

[they’ll never trust you enough to share, and you convince yourself you’re okay with that.

you aren’t.]

  the third thing you learn about pendragon is that they have a shitty sleeping schedule.

it’s not really surprising, if you consider the bigger picture ― there are certain things you see (certain things you do) that make your stomach lurch, your thoughts scatter, things that there are parts of you that wish you had forgotten. still. still. you push that back, like you do with everything else that bothers you ― you push through and move on, because there’s not a single reason to mull it over more than you need to.

pendragon doesn’t.

it takes you a while to notice, because it’s not the kind of thing you usually pay attention to ― by the time you retire for the night, pendragon’s usually off doing... whatever it is that they do when they’re not picking fights with you or stress smoking in places they shouldn’t. they’re not the type to stick by idly when they have no reason to, unless they’re looking for a way to pick a fight or trying to annoy you into an argument, and you’re not too fond of the idea of trying to entertain their quirks, either.

in retrospect, perhaps you should’ve paid more attention.

[you didn’t want to, is the truth. you didn’t want to reach out, to try and understand, you didn’t want to know. pendragon is insufferable at their best, and there was nothing you had wanted more than to not be forced into interacting with them.]

you realize your mistake when the first nightmare comes.

it’s ugly, is the thing ― the way they scream and trash and kick and fight you when you come, the terror in their eyes, the horror. you hadn’t known a creature such as pendragon could even fear, when they have never as much as flinched when faced with the things you face on an almost daily basis, and it’s not the kind of thing you wish to see again anytime soon.

it takes a while to make them stop trying to punch you away, and you still come out with a bloodied mouth and a split lip ― it aches like hell, but it doesn’t come close to the worst you’ve ever had. you try not to push, then ― deals with it the same way you saw a lady deal with a scared cat, once, tentatively soothing words and an even voice. you don’t know what to say, have no idea if it’s even working, but it doesn’t seem to matter ― pendragon’s eyes fix on a spot behind your shoulder, and their breath evens for long enough that you don’t have to worry about them hyperventilating anymore.

it's not ― good. it’s not good, you doubt it’ll ever be, but it’s better than before. you don’t try do get close, you know you won’t be welcome, but leaving sounds as wrong as touching pendragon does at the moment, so you do neither.

(you weren’t taught how to deal with this, were you?)

“stay.”

it’s not a question, but it doesn’t sound like a demand, either. pendragon’s eyes have found yours, though, and it’s the first time you realize how blue they are. not terrified, anymore, but there’s not much else to it, either ― icy and hollow, just like everything pendragon says.

you nod, just once, and, just like that, their eyes slip away again, back to the spot behind your shoulder.

(were it any other moment, in any other situation, you would’ve been angry, wouldn’t you? you would’ve lashed out. you would’ve relented to all the bitterness that crawls under your skin, searching for cracks to peek through, to peel alway scabs and reopen wounds you had sworn being healed. you don’t, this time. you sit in front of them, your back straight, your hands resting on your knees. you wait, and count the minutes on your head. you taste the blood on your mouth, the headache building behind your eyelids. saren doesn’t move for a long, long time. you stay.)

when they move, you want to do the same. wobbly legs and blueish lips, they’re the perfect image of someone who’s about to crash ― but you don’t reach out, still, you hold your hands in closed fists against your sides when you follow them to the bathroom. pendragon doesn’t seem to notice, doesn’t seem aware of your presence, even though they have told you to stay ― there’s something mechanical about the way they do this, the unsteady legs, the hunched shoulders, the shaky hands that turn on the shower.

had they started to take off their clothes, you’d slip away unnoticed, easily enough ― but they don’t.

the sound of running water seems to calm pendragon down, but color has yet to return to their face, and you’re not entirely sure reaching out right now is a good idea. you don’t, then, careful, and you watch as pendragon slids against the bathroom tiles until they’re on the floor, water pooling around them, soaking through their clothes, clinging to their frame.

a thin frame, you realize. unhealthily thin ― the protruding shoulder bones, the sunken cheeks, when was the last time they ate? you don’t ask, but anger rises the way it always does, and the taste it leaves on your mouth to add to the blood is sour. this is not your fight to have, is it? and even if it were. even if it were. pendragon clings to their knees, presses them against their chest, bony fingers littered by purple and blue bruises you don’t remember seeing before, and you know that, if you even try to push, they’ll break.

you don’t. they don’t say a thing, after that, and you weren’t expecting them to.

you stay.

  the fourth thing you learn about pendragon is something you’d rather have not known.

you find them in the bathtub, bloody water up to the middle of their chest, cigarette burns littered across their arms ― clawed bruises on their throat, dark circles under their eyes that speak of one too many sleepless nights, a dazed expression that tells you they’re too caught up in their own mind to realize you’re in the same room as them.

your reaction, unsurprisingly, is not good.

[you avoid thinking about it, later. you avoid thinking about the possiblity that you might have been wrong reacting so strongly. you avoid the entire thing altogether ― except the way the color of the bruises across pendragon’s skin is imprinted on your mind, the self-inflicted wounds, the way they had flinched away from you when you started screaming, until they picked themselves back up again and slammed their walls right back in place. you don’t think about it ― except for all the moments you do.]

“you don’t know shit!” if pendragon were a violent person, you know, this is the moment they’d start swinging fists ― but they are not, so they don’t. doesn’t mean they don’t want to. “get the hell away from me!”

and maybe you should, alright? maybe you should. but you don’t, won’t, can’t. you blink and behind your eyelids you see fingers clinging to exposed collarbones, the angry marks running down pendragon’s throat. bloodied fingers, cracked nails, raw knuckles. bloodied collarbones, blooming blue purple bruises all the way to their jaw, icy blue eyes full of anger. bile rises up your throat.

you step closer, and pendragon’s eyes flash to you like a beast that’s got the prey.

“leave.” they say, and their voice cracks at the end. “just ― fucking leave, will you?”

you don’t want to, but you do. you step back once. then twice. then again ― until you’re at a distance where you’re not gone, but at least pendragon doesn’t look like a cornered animal anymore, until they don’t look like they’re ready to either fight or flee if they deem necessary. the bitter taste’s still on your mouth, and, this time, it’s not from anger.

[there’s a part of you that wishes it was. is this what it feels like ― failure? you don’t know. you’re not keen on finding out, either.]

  the fifth thing you learn about pendragon is not something you can put into words.

most people have a kind of feeling attached to them ― the kind of thing that rises at the back of your mind, a nudging sensation that steers you away from trouble when you need it to, the instinctual urge that pulls and tugs and grows if you ever consider ignoring it.

most people never get past the first flash of red on your head ― even less manage to slip away unnoticed. pendragon’s always been weird, not quite a pleasant presence, but not strange enough to put you off. not until you pay enough attention, at least. not until they pay enough attention.

it's something that comes after you start watching them, you notice ― they start watching back, and you’d be lying if you said that, alone, isn’t unnerving.

not a red sign, but close enough to one that you’re not strictly comfortable around them anymore; not that you ever were in the first place, but that was because they were being annoying, not because they made you feel threatened.

they do, now― their eyes never leave yours, a predator ready to pounce, and there’s a visceral part of you that twists and coils over itself, demanding you to flee. pendragon watches you back the same way a cat does to mice, the hungry silence that tells you that the moment you put your guard down you’re a goner.

red flashes, all of them. the instinctual urge to step back, to retreat, the knowledge that rings wrong wrong wrong all the way down to the pitch of your stomach. saren pendragon is a beast trapped in human flesh, sharp edges and bloodied mouth ― bared teeth that speak wordless warnings of violence and rage, a string wrung so tightly it’s constantly a step away from snapping.

there’s a part of you that almost wishes you’d pull that string until it does ― that wishes you’d tug until it snaps and the broken parts come undone in a bloodied mess, a dreadful sight, sharp edges splintered to an unrecognizable wreck.

[that’s the part you ignore, the part you shove down until it’s almost gone, just a faint shadow that peeks at the corners of your mind, lurking, waiting, hungry.]

  after meeting pendragon, this is what you learn about yourself: saren isn’t the only beast you have to be watchful for.

#greenwarden #marc bautista #fan warden #saren pendragon #fanfiction #thekla plays writer #mine #lowercase #i hate tumblr formatting #wtf is this #let me use my indents #i nEED my indents #you can pry italic from my cold dead hands

[chaoticspacefam]

OC Music Meme

I was tagged for this by @actualanxiousswampwitch ! Thank you & sorry it took so long, didn’t have time to write this out before I left for holiday stuff so here we go! I shall tag: @actualanxiousswampwitch (go on give us another one XD), @a-muirehen​ , @kyber-heart​ , @thedinalixlegacy​ (no pressure as always, I know I’m kinda late now sksjkshskhs!) and anyone else who wants to do this, yes, I promise I mean you!

art is by @ ocellifera on deviantART! :D

Let’s do Aria this time, shall we! Since her playlist is the second-longest, and her and Vano’s ship playlist is the longest, we’ll have the most (probable options! Long post so goin’ under a cut. Additional TW’s for: drugs, alcohol, alcoholism, drug addiction and murder, in case I’ve forgotten to add it to the song-specific sections. If you click past this cut, know that this is what you may find there.

reminds you of them most: It was super hard to pick just three for hers, there were so many others I wanted to include here, but couldn’t, as I wanted to make sure I included songs that covered as much of her over-arching characterisation as I could. Honourable mentions to: Miss Jackson - Panic! At The Disco feat. LOLO, Wilson (Expensive Mistakes) - Fall Out Boy, Beekeeper - Keaton Henson, and Bones Of A Rabbit - Young Heretics, which can all be found (and more) on her Spotify Playlist - catch-all warning for: sex, drugs, violence and murdering of parents applies here, be aware her playlist is very dark, just as dark as Rai’s but with differing subject matter, proceed with caution if you find anything like that triggering!)

You’re Going Down - Sick Puppies :: This one is kinda self-explanatory. I heard it on a Spotify or Youtube shuffle at some point a year or so ago and immediately went “Oh, hey Aria!” so onto her playlist it went XD “Because I'm hyped up out of control If it's a fight, I'm ready to go I wouldn't put my money on the other guy If you know what I know that I know.”  don’t mess with the Tiny Sith, guys, she will put you in the medbay. She’ll do it, she’s done it before ask Vano what happened to the last guy *nods*

Liar - The Arcadian Wild :: This is a relatively “new” song in comparison, which was sent to me by a good rp/writer friend on Discord (who afaik doesn’t have other socials!) that I often discuss plot points etc. with among other things, saying “hey this reminded me of Aria thought you’d like it!”. I listened to it and yep, sure enough, it’s an Aria song. A big part of Aria’s character is that at the start, she really is quite a bad person. She’s nasty, and cantankerous and she really doesn’t care about anybody except for herself (and maybe her dad. A tiny bit.), as things progress, however, while she is still inherently quite rude and selfish, she DOES learn to value other people...provided they are people she cares about, like Vano, and her friends, and so on,  as well as (sometimes, she’s working on it still) taking the blame for her own actions and learning it’s not “weak” or bad to a) admit you care about people, b) make mistakes and c) admit those mistakes and take responsibility for them. "I sense there’s trouble ahead, it’s clear by the signs and warnings. That should tell where all blame is due, So why are they pointing at MY head? [...] I sense deception to come. Honestly, truth and I are never one. 'Cause I am the lying man and I have made you my next victim. I need you to see through my act, to tell me I'm wrong, to take off the mask, or else I'll be left in the lie. And I'll deceive my way straight to demise! Cause I’m not in the right state of mind, I just wish I had strength to admit it. My stubbornness will put up a fight! But I don’t deserve to win it... I’m left in the dark, pondering my mistakes But in the light I swear I will, deny it all...” 

I didn’t mean to post like half the song but woops it’s done so have it anyway lmao

Brutus - The Buttress :: TW: intense violent imagery in the lyrics. This one is very relevant but contains spoilers for upcoming and as of yet unposted/incomplete chapters (as in...like 3 ish chapters time at most) of Creeping Shadows, so I’ll post this quote as “explanation” and let you theorize who it’s about

“My name is Brutus and my name means “heavy” So with a heavy heart I'll guide this dagger into the heart of my Enemy! My whole life you were a teacher and friend to me Please know my actions are not motivated only by envy I too have a destiny! This death will be art! The people will speak of this day from near and afar This event will be history, And I'll be great too! I don't want what you have, I wanna be you!!“

reminds another character of them:

Where’s My Love? - SYML :: (Vano) I think the acoustic version is especially emotional : ))) Vano looked for her for years but couldn’t find her and genuinely thought Aria was dead. You can understand why she was so fucking angry when she found out that was a lie...but at the same time, she just wanted her love to come home :( “Did she run away? Did she run away? I don't know If she ran away, If she ran away, Come back home Just come home“

Mothers - Daughter :: (Myla, her mother) “Love all you need to love before it goes... When your face becomes a stranger’s that I don’t know. You will never remember who I was to you [...] I’m called “mother”, but they’re called “home”.”

Myla raised Aria for the first few years of her life, and really wanted to keep her away from both the Jedi and the Sith but as it became more and more clear that Aria’s Force affinity was as strong as her father’s, the situation rapidly spiralled out of Myla’s control. She tried to hide Aria, but in the end her father Noctis did find them and take Aria to train with the Sith. She didn’t see her daughter again until she was a teenager, suddenly turning up with the task to kill her for treason against the Empire (Myla is not the canon Imp Agent, but follows the general trajectory of the LS!Agent storyline i.e. an agent disillusioned with the Empire who eventually defects to the Republic with the help of the SIS.). Though she’s a Senator on Onderon now, Myla carried a blaster for personal protection and ofc knows how to use it, except...she couldn’t shoot her own daughter and that was all she wrote. I imagine her thought process during her final moments went something like in this song, especially the bit that I highlighted up there.

reminds you of a relationship of theirs, doesn’t have to be romantic, can be paternal, friendly, etc:

Tongues & Teeth - The Crane Wives :: Aria & Vano (Romantic). Aria’s relationship with Vano is incredibly messy and complicated. On one hand, she knows Vano deserves better, but at the same time she doesn’t want her to go anywhere else and it seems like no matter what she does to try and “warn her off” about what a “bad person” she is, Vano keeps coming back anyway. Ergo, this song. "Oh, I will ruin you. I will ruin you. It’s a habit...I can’t help it. I know that you mean so well, but I am not a vessel for your good intent. I will only break your pretty things, I will only wring you dry of everything! But if you’re fine with that, if you’re fine with that [...] You can be mine.”

Colours - Halsey :: Aria & Merak & Ziri (Friendship/Platonic Love) “You’re only happy when your sorry head is filled with dope, I hope you make it to the day you’re 28 years old...”

Aria “coped” (i.e. not very well but she did it) with the guilt of killing her mother and the stress brought on by the night terrors by self-medicating with glitterstims (spice) and alcohol, and this is how Merak in particular remembers her. Though she got clean from spice after they picked up Ziri, she still continued to drink (and still does) quite heavily, though at least it’s easier to manage that habit. Both of them supported her through this the best they could and it’s probably a big reason (other than Merak being Vano’s little brother) that they’re still Aria’s friends to this day, even if she doesn’t actively travel with them anymore.

(honourable mention to Agnes - Glass Animals which also falls under this “category” but I didn’t want this to get too crowded lmao, it is once again a super long post woops) You’re Gonna Go Far, Kid - The Offspring :: Aria & Roan/Darth Noctis (Familial/Familial Love) Listen, he may have taught her very bad emotional habits and turned her into a tiny attack dog, but her father did love & protect her the best way he possibly could. He was very proud of her and always envisioned her taking his place as a Darth one day (and it takes her a longass while, but eventually she does! Congrats dad!). That’s all I’ve got to say about this one 🤷‍♀️ Monster - Willyecho :: Aria & Satele Shan/The Jedi Order (Enemies to Begrudging Respect (eventually) “I can see the truth. No, you don’t have to lie to me. Don’t fill your head with things and think you’re free~ [...] You don’t believe in monsters, do you~?” ”Of course not!” ”Well, I do...” See me change...into something...darker....” My personal favourite from this “round”. It’s not until Ilum that Satele and the Jedi finally realise they have not “converted” Aria as they thought they did, but rather...they’ve had a Sith hiding under their noses, a Sith related to a Dark Councillor well-known for murdering Jedi no less, and that perhaps...the “deaths” she had convinced them were accidental, were in fact, not an accident at all. 😈 Aria, of course, gets her ass thrown in jail for a few years for this lmao When the schtick with the Revanites happens and Theron needs someone who can “negotiate in a civil manner with Sith”, he and his mother agree Aria is the best bet - if it works, the Sith will respond more positively to her than any other Jedi, if they kill her instead then they’re “rid of” her and don’t lose one of their own - when Lana’s point-of-contact happens to be Vano and the pair reunite after another several years apart, Aria refuses to return to the Republic after Yavin IV. By then, she’s developed enough of a begrudging respect for Satele (and vice versa) that the Grand Master lets her go (not that she was willing to try and fight Vano, Ni’kasi, Marr & Lana to try and take Aria prisoner again anyways). They haven’t seen each other since and though Aria is neutral to the Jedi who have joined the Alliance, she doesn’t care for those who are still loyal to the Republic and would rather have nothing to do with them if she can help it.

#swtor #star wars: the old republic #tagged meme #OC music meme #swtor oc: aria saal #jedi consular #ds! jedi consular #jedi consular (sith assassin) #subterfugeverse #swtor shipping #aria/vano #ariano #tw: drugs #tw: drug addiction #tw: alcohol #tw: alcoholism #tw: implied ptsd #tw: violence #lots of angst on this one i'm sorry #i didn't expect aria's to be more angsty than rai's but here we are LMAO #tumblr ate this post right as i was about to queue it when it committed die last night #so uhhh...it might not be as good as the first draft #but i tried to put back as much as i could remember #:'D

[a--knightinsourarmor]

PLEASE, READ THOSE RULES BEFORE DECIDING IF YOU WANT US TO INTERACT

MAIN HUB BLOG/SIDEBLOGS: My main roleplay hub blog is knightinsourarmor and I follow, send asks, and like from there. I currently have seven sideblogs, one for each of my muses. Todoroki Shoto (repressedkindness), Pro-Hero Todoroki Toya (hopelesslypersisting), Amajiki Tamaki (sunlitsoul), Novak Castiel (BNHA verse for SPN canon) (shatteredoptimist), Kambe Daisuke (unwaveringdetermination), Levi Ackerman (dreamsofregret), and Castiel (defectivesoldier). If somebody follows me on any of these sideblogs, I’ll assume they wish to interact with them. You don’t need to follow my main blog, but I suggest you do so. On my main blog I post ooc posts, muse updates, activity updates, memes, starter calls while any testing muses will be portrayed there. If I find you only follow my main blog… You either haven’t read my rules and my muses page or you only care for my ooc shit? 

REPLIES: I want to study as a med student and have to work at the same time. That means that I can be really slow when it comes to replies. I wish you understand and don’t feel offended or lose your interest if I take some time to answer our thread. I believe in quality over quantity. Some days I might reply to specific people. That has nothing to do with you or your writing. I just might need to roleplay a specific matter or thread or enjoy someone’s writing too much and need to focus on that for some time. Not replying may also mean the exact opposite. That I can’t come up with a good enough reply compared to yours and need some more time.

MUTUALS/NON-MUTUALS/FOLLOWING: When I follow someone, I have read their rules, about and verses pages, and some of their threads. If someone follows me and I haven’t followed back in a week or two, that means I’ve checked their blog but I can’t find myself writing with them. Non-mutuals can send me asks, like my starter calls, and reply to my open starters. If after some interactions I find myself interested in their writing, I will follow them back. When I become mutuals with someone and if I am not on a hiatus or semi-hiatus, I’ll write a small starter to break the ice. Nobody is forced to reply to it.

AGE: I am over the age of eighteen. I won’t write with anyone younger than the age of sixteen. I am open to roleplay almost anything and this will be a free NSFW blog. I won’t roleplay anything which will be considered R-rated with minors, meaning anything that includes sexual themes, intense graphic violence, drug abuse, etc. but I am open to write most things if both muns are of age.

TRIGGERS: I tag the triggers my mutuals have on their rules/about page. A doc with all the triggers tagged will be added soon. If you need me to tag a specific trigger, feel free to send me an ask or a message. I tag triggers like: ’#tw: yourtriggergoeshere’ without the quotation marks. My own triggers are ridiculous ones, but I’d be grateful if you tagged them. It’s aliens and cockroaches. That’s the reason I won’t be writing with any roleplay blogs having alien muses (those having a disgusting non-human form).

TAGGING: I have a very specific tagging system. If someone doesn’t want to see a specific character or faceclaim (you’ll need to block the character’s name again) on their dash, I tag the character in both threads and fanart as: #|| (ch.) character name || . For most anime, their last name goes first, except Shingeki No Kyojin (Attack On Titan).

SHIPPING: I prefer male x male relationships. I am a little picky with female OCs because of bad past experiences. I do not mind age gaps as long as both muses are adults (p.e. Levi x Eren) but I will not ship a young muse with someone who is like a father figure to them (Aizawa x Shoto). I am very slow to ship, for the reason I like building a relationship through threads. If there’s chemistry, feel free to discuss shipping or like my shipping call.

SMUT: I will not write explicit sexual scenes anymore. For muses of age and muses with high sex drive, depending on the chemistry between our muses, the limit is foreplay. Most of my muses are asexual. For them, it is very rare to happen anything more than kissing and cuddling. I will fade to black. I do not feel comfortable writing detailed sexual scenes anymore, the only part that interests me is the tension and trust built between our muses and aftercare. Inappropriate language may be present for all muses.

DRAMA: I don’t care for any drama or witch hunts going around. If I see any on my dash, this will result in me soft-blocking or hard-blocking you. I don’t want to participate in any of these and I find them disturbing.

FORMATTING: I cut posts and use small text and icons. If my roleplay partner doesn’t use icons, I won’t use any myself.

MULTIPLE THREADS: I don’t mind having multiple threads with the same person especially if I enjoy their writing.

POST LENGTH: My writing style is advanced literate. That means I need more than a paragraph to roleplay with. One paragraph is fine still, but as long as there’s something interesting to reply. I don’t mind how long your replies are. Just take notice that I will probably mirror you and my reply will be the same length.

SELECTIVE: I am selective when it comes to writing. I need a paragraph or more to reply. I need to roleplay in third person and I don’t roleplay on DM. I roleplay on discord so if we are mutuals, feel free to ask for it.

MAINS: I have blogs/threads which I prioritize over others. This isn’t personal. I just feel more motivated to reply to those. I don’t have exclusives.

TRACKING/REMINDERS:  I usually track my threads with an app but it takes a lot of my time. I try to use a tagging system even if it doesn’t work as well as I want it to. Don’t be scared to remind me to reply to something I might have forgotten. I could possibly forget to add it to my tracker but constant reminders make me lose my interest in the roleplay (if there’s any). I understand and appreciate for someone to tell me I have forgotten something. Myself, I will remind someone of our thread after two months or even more.

TIME-SKIP: Well, I’m someone who can enjoy something that is slow. I am pleased with anything as long as there’s some really good and inspiring writing (how many times have I said this?). I can keep a thread for years (and I have) and not be bored of it. If you start getting bored we can time-skip but I’d want to discuss this first.

DROPPING THREADS: Unless it’s a one-liner, I don’t drop threads. If you do drop one of our threads, I’d appreciate it if you told me.

ASKS: You are free to send an ic ask to all of my blogs. My main or my sideblogs, as long as you specify, I don’t mind. You can continue an ask I have answered. I actually encourage you to do so.

STARTERS: My open starters are actually open to everyone and don’t hesitate to reply to one if someone else already has. Then I’ll reply to another post and tag you. If I offer to make a starter and you accept and you don’t reply after a month, and if I have messaged you and you haven’t responded but you are actually active, sorry but no matter how specifically we have plotted our thread, I’ll assume you are not interested anymore and turn it to an open starter. I put some time into those and I don’t want it to be to waste.

CROSSOVERS/AUS: I really love writing AUs and crossovers. I enjoy the possibility of characters from other fandoms interacting with each other. I have crossover verses for some of my muses and more will be added in the near future. For characters from fandoms I am not aware of, I’d like to write with them on a modern verse or one both muns agree on. For those characters, I’ll treat them like OCs.

OCS: I enjoy writing with OCs, as long as they have enough info and our writing mesh well. For most OCs, our first thread will be one that our muses get to know each other for the first time. I’d like for them to meet as complete strangers and let their relationship build naturally.

ENGLISH: English is not my mother language. I have learnt English completely alone and it’s something that has been hard for me. I understand telling me if I have made any mistakes or ask me if you didn’t understand something but I won’t take any criticism.

MEMES/FANART: This is something I had recently started to be annoyed with. Please, do not use me as meme or fanart source. This goes for roleplay partners or not. Please, reblog memes AND fanart from the source.

SPOILERS: This blog is not spoiler-free. I will tag spoilers: #|| spoilers || and try to keep everything under READ MORE. You have been warned.

THANK YOU FOR READING MY RUMBLING BEFORE FOLLOWING ME FIRST. PLEASE CHECK MY MUSES AND NAVIGATION PAGE AND FILL MY INTEREST CHECKER. ALSO YOU CAN CHECK MY VERSES AND OPEN STARTERS. YOU CAN MESSAGE ME AND PLOT ANY TIME. THANKS FOR YOUR TIME. JUST FYI I MIGHT NOT BE TALKATIVE. THIS IS NOT PERSONAL AND DOESN’T MEAN I AM NOT INTERESTED FOR OUR MUSES TO INTERACT..

UPDATES

DAY/MONTH/YEAR: -

16/03/2021: REWRITTEN MY RULES

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