#WATCH ME DRAW MULTIPLE FAN ARTS ABOUT THEIR ASS BEING IN LOVE | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

gisachi · 3 years

Note

Hi ^^ I know that your requests are now closed but I was thinking that, given you have written jealous Shinichi, I would very much enjoy some jealous Ran! Maybe you can mix it with one of the prompts? Just throwing the idea out there, no pressure. Delete this if you don't feel like it, it's okay really. Thank you for writing these amazing fics, the shinran fandom is in your debt. ❤️

So this is the last (!!!) and longest (!!!) of the kiss prompts, and I dedicate it to multiple-requests Anon and to this Anon. I hope both of you still see this. It took me a while. ^^;;

P.S. Special thanks to @artycreaty for keeping this in check. You are awesome. 🥰

41. Kisses shared under an umbrella. 46. A lingering kiss before a long trip apart. (6,489 words)

Ran keeps telling herself she has no right to be jealous.

She has hundreds of reasons not to. They’re merely childhood best friends. Life would be much easier if she didn’t involve herself in his business twenty-four seven. Shinichi absolutely doesn’t look at her that way. And so forth.

She wonders why they’re even friends in the first place. If their parents hadn’t enrolled them in the same kindergarten, she was certain they wouldn’t even be on speaking terms. He lives in a world of grisly books and crimes, she in a world of martial and visual arts. Their hobbies don’t overlap. They excel in different fields. They enter the same university with completely unrelated majors. The only bond they have in common is their shared history. Literally bonded since they were four, until now at nineteen.

So when she sees him all jolly around his newfound circle who hold the same interest in Holmes or detective work, it shouldn’t surprise her as much. It’s part of university life, it’s normal, they expand their horizons, and Ran understands that it hits much differently when they bond with people who like the same stuff they do. Something she’s aware they cannot share a hundred percent.

She’s proud of him, and she absolutely has no right to feel jealous, especially when she sees him around taller, prettier, more interesting women from his course block. There is no reason for her to look away with a heavy weight in her chest everytime the women get giggly and touchy while he’s absorbed in narrating his stories.

Everytime she does, she reminds herself of how he didn’t seem to mind when she was casted as the protagonist of their high school play and the leading man was the handsome Araide-sensei. Or how he simply shrugged when she fawned over the brother of a classmate because he looked so much like the karate senpai she was crushing on. Or when she secretly caught Sonoko dragging the detective behind gym after P.E. to confront him about his opinion regarding an upperclassman courting Ran and his only response was, ‘She can like whoever she likes, Sonoko. I’m not her boyfriend.’

He never showed her any sign of jealousy, therefore he must not be into her. Simple as that. So it’s unfair for her to be treating him differently. Getting snarky just because he received sixteen new fan mails again, more now that they’re in uni, and two even coming from the popular criminology seniors he is often teased to? Or ignoring him unprecedentedly just because his eyes followed the back of a woman with long chestnut hair and voluptuous curves? There are plenty of fish in the sea, and he’s bound to be attracted to someone else. This is a pill she ought to learn to swallow eventually.

Eventually.

“Shinichi-kun, you never told us about your scariest case yet, tell us about it?”

Kaori closes her notes and so do the other two girls across her, and Shinichi’s eyes twinkle. He truly seems to enjoy study sessions with the little group they made consisting of some of his and Ran’s coursemates because they love listening to his stories.

“At the top of my head is this murderer disguised as a bandaged man, and he targeted us one by one…” and so the detective drones. Ran pauses typing and reminisces quietly. Ah, that one from summer three years ago. I was almost injured by that crazy man during my sleep but Shinichi woke me up in time.

“Ran-san,” Shun, her friend and coursemate, mutters beside her, also stopping his typing to listen to the detective’s story. “It’s ridiculous how popular Kudou-kun is with the girls. He’s full of wild adventures.”

“Yes, he is,” Ran says, smiling. “He’s been a girl magnet ever since high school.”

She watches as Kaori inches closer to Shinichi, listening attentively, chin on her palm and flirtatious smile on her lips as the detective rants on and on.

For the third time that afternoon, Ran looks away.

Ran keeps telling herself she has no right to be jealous.

She does, everyday, but it’s hard when he smiles at her, cares for her, holds her in a way she’s never seen him do for anyone else. It gives her hope every time the girls cling to him but he never touches them back, whereas he automatically slings his arm over her shoulder because she’s afraid or cold or he simply feels like it.

Then again, maybe she’s giving herself too much credit. Perhaps it’s a free pass for being around him for too long. She even gets to spend time with him during weekends and holidays. It isn’t special because it’s normal.

And that’s all she’ll ever be, a normal girl in his eyes.

“Ran? She’s pretty special.”

Ran reacts to the mention of her name and catches Shinichi looking at her. “She appears quiet but she can kick anyone’s ass without breaking a sweat. It’s bad if you cross her,” Shinichi gloats with a grin.

“Oh my god, really? We can bring her with us then!” Kaori claps her hands in excitement.

“Ah... But she won’t like that,” he follows up, wary. Ran has missed the topic they were talking about and now she’s curious.

“But ghosts aren’t real and Mouri-san can give them a good beating!”

“Gh-Ghosts?” The color in her cheeks drains, eyes freezing at Shinichi who has probably already expected that reaction, for he sports that same look of concern as those times he had expressed whenever she joined him in his way-past-bedtime elementary school adventures.

“We’ll investigate an abandoned house I always pass by walking home,” Kaori explains. “Last night I saw a faint cigarette light at the second floor window. It might be a fugitive or a homeless person or a ghost, who knows?”

“You don’t need to come if you don’t want to, Ran,” Shinichi assures.

Gulping, Ran contemplates whether going with them will do her any good. It’s a nice change, it’s been a while since she last tagged with Shinichi in his cases. But she isn’t exactly proud of shrieking like a little kid in front of serious criminology majors who may feel like she’ll drag their covert investigation down if she joins.

“...I’ll pass,” she answers meekly, and his coursemates sulk except Shinichi, who offers her a smile of understanding.

“Man, I thought we’ll be able to see Mouri-san in action!”

“That’s ok, maybe next time. We still have Shinichi-kun!”

“Shinichi-kun will protect us, ne?”

“Hah. Right. Invite Hakuba too, use him.”

“Oh c’mooon, Shinichi-kun!”

Ran closes her eyes, struggling to zone their voices out.

In her silence, Ran ponders if she has made a wrong choice.

Ran has no right to be jealous. So it’s unfair for her to be treating him this way.

The following weekend, Shinichi narrates what happened in their late-night investigation. Hakuba wasn’t there so Shinichi was the only available guy as usual. Ran refuses to hear any more details, both of the haunted house and secretly of the girls chancing onto him during the investigation. Shinichi is puzzled.

“Did I do something wrong?”

“Nah, just swamped with work.”

“On a Sunday?”

“Yes.”

“Want me to assist?”

“No.”

Her replies are curt from the couch of his house, not looking at Shinichi on the other end as she mindlessly cleans up her digital sketches. She hates how snappy she sounds but her brain is too absorbed with conjuring spiteful imaginations to even think of masking her annoyance.

“Ran, hey. Look at me.”

His low voice freezes her from drawing, and she slowly looks up to meet Shinichi’s serious eyes.

When this happens, she knows he’s reading her. She inwardly chants a prayer because now isn’t a good time. Whatever time isn’t a good time. She doesn’t know what to say when she’s aware everything she’s been feeling is irrational and unfair. She’s being selfish.

“You’re… stressed.”

“No, I’m… Eh?”

He scoots closer, an arm’s length away. “Your dark circles are more prominent now, you need a break.” His eyes turn a soft blue. “Let’s have dinner out? My treat.”

Ran is surprised, to say the least. The last time he invited her out was two weeks ago. She’s become so used to seeing him around others that any initiative from him sounds too good to be true.

“But I need to finish this project by tonight.”

“Let’s have food delivery then!” Shinichi announces, not rattled by Ran’s indirect refusal. “I know exactly what you want. Ramen and shaved ice.”

Her eyes thin at the absurdly goofy expression she knows he makes when he’s being mischievous. “Clearly you’re ordering that ramen for yourself. I only like shaved ice.”

“Damn! Miss Detective gets it.” A mile-wide grin stretches across his face, earning an eye roll from the half-smiling woman. “Let’s eat together on your short break, please?”

He leans within a respectful distance and she sees his smile better, pair of kind eyes locking with her overworked ones. “It’s been a while.”

Her heart throbs for him. So much.

She caves - of course she does - and breathes her acquiescence.

After two long weeks, they have dinner together, just them and Shinichi’s ramen and Ran’s donburi and shaved ice, Shinichi taking a spoonful of dessert from the cup when she isn’t looking and Ran snatching a slurp from his take-out bowl and laughing when he catches her.

With how heartfelt his laughter is in her presence devoid of any mysteries, Ran knows she’s probably giving herself too much credit, but for once she wants to believe she is the cause of why Shinichi’s happy.

Just for that night, she gives it to herself.

She’ll change the dark colors of her digital artwork to brighter ones after they eat.

Despite everything, Ran finds it difficult to contain her recurring jealousy.

The more she shares precious time with him, the more it gets harder to suppress the selfish emotions. What is so unsatisfying about being the best friend is that she is only the best friend. No more no less. At the end of the day, she isn’t the one he gets to cuddle with, to tease then kiss, to tell ‘I love you’ to, romantically.

“I love you.”

Ran feels her heart about to leap out of her chest.

“But please. Stop. Tearing. The. Cushions!”

The little furball he has scooped underneath a throw pillow wiggle from his grasp. The kitten and detective engage in a brief staring showdown before it jumps away to hide under a farther couch.

Snapping out of reverie, Ran watches her childhood friend slink dejectedly onto the partly scratched furniture. He’s fortunate enough that his mother isn’t around to give him a long lecture on Why Pets Aren’t Allowed in the House 101. She can always take Yukiko-san’s role and reprimand him for it, but as for this and the cat, she finds herself not wanting to intervene.

“Kaori-san sure is taking her time with her parent’s permission. By the time she does, Momo would’ve shredded all the pillows in this house.”

“You named the cat?” Ran asks, amused.

“She did.” He thinks for a moment, then sniggers. “Actually I did. I suggested a random name. She took it.”

Ran merely hums. What can she say? They’re getting close. Close enough to team up as parents to an adopted kitten.

“I’m surprised you also agreed to keep Momo when you never took in animals before.”

“Kaori said she’ll treat me to the latest Detective Samonji movie this weekend if I do. Can’t resist that.”

“Just you two?”

“Yeah.”

A beat. Then he turns to her.

“Wanna join? I can ask her to count you in since you’re kinda helpi—”

“N-no need,” Ran quips, “It’s—It’s fine.”

“No really,” Shinichi insists, “Kaori-san has a lot of money, she—”

“I’m going to Tokyo Metropolitan Art Museum with Shun-san this weekend... so... I can’t.”

“Ah.”

Silence.

“It’s, um, for a project,” she bolsters.

“I know.” The faintest smile graces his lips. “It’s your thing. Both of you.”

“Mm.”

He doesn’t say anything else after that.

“Shinichi, you’re a detective, right?” she blurts out of the blue.

“Yeah...and?”

Then deduce what I feel. Here and now.

“Then you’re going to enjoy that movie!” Ran forces a beam, giving Shinichi a thumb of approval. “And you can discuss it with Kaori-san over dinner. I’m sure you two have a lot to say about it.”

Shinichi’s eyes linger on her, reading her like a book, and Ran has her mind reeling again, afraid to be read.

“Yeah, we do,” he finally says, ending the conversation.

Only a few words are uttered the rest of the afternoon.

Momo resurfaces and curls beside Shinichi.

Momo’s purring is loud, but Ran’s shattering heart is louder.

Ran must not feel jealous. She is not a girlfriend.

Because she isn’t a girlfriend, he’s free to fall for and date anyone else. Who is she to gatekeep him? There are plenty of fish in the sea, and he’s one big catch. Ran believes she’s a big catch, too. With the way she loves dearly, her future boyfriend is going to be very lucky.

Her future boyfriend is not going to be him.

“...mber the required fieldwork in one of my majors I told you? We actually go by batches. The first batch did theirs last month. The second batch was last week… and I— Ran, are you listening?”

“Ah! Yes,” Ran notices they have already reached her station and are now walking two blocks to her apartment. “Your fieldwork, right?”

“...Yeah,” he carries on. “I’m in the last batch... This whole winter break.”

“I see, I understand.” She smiles, getting what he means. No Christmas or New Year’s Eve together. The first time since they’re four. It’s fine, honestly. If it’s a required activity, then there’s really no way to go about it. She isn’t going to lash out just because she can’t be with him in her most favorite time of the year.

“And Hattori-kun and Hakuba-kun will be with you?”

“Hattori did his last month. Hakuba is in the previous batch. I’ll be stuck with the girls.”

Ran’s heart momentarily squeezes. “Where will your fieldwork be?”

“In Akita.”

Her pupils constrict. “That far?”

“Yes... so to cut on expenses, Kaori-san offered her house for me and the others to stay while we’re there—”

Kaori. Again with the tall, beautiful, intelligent Kaori. She bets it’s amazing to spend the holidays doing what he loves and with Kaori beside her, snuggling with him by the fireplace in a romantic snowy night and she might even confess, and it’ll be a great catch for Shinichi, and he’ll return with a girlfriend, and—

“Kaori-san is lucky.” The words flow out of her mouth, unbridled.

Shinichi looks at her. “Lucky?”

Ran remains quiet and keeps walking. It’s dangerous to say anything. She only has one thing in her mind and she doesn’t want to say it out loud. She has no right.

“Ran, hey.”

She doesn’t stop walking.

“Ran.”

She ignores his call.

“Ran… you’re jealous.”

She stops walking.

“Excuse me?”

“...You’re jealous…” Shinichi repeats quietly.

A contrast to his calm tone, his irises beset hers in the cold twilight and Ran attempts to shield herself but her bag and umbrella are in the way. She thinks of turning away but her feet are frigid like icicles, and Shinichi steps closer.

For the third time, he declares, “You’re jealous.”

Hearing her thoughts echo through his words renders her speechless.

It seems to take a moment before Shinichi’s brow arches, lips curl up as his eyes refuse to stray, and she hears a faint exhale even, like he’s exasperated, and suddenly he’s smiling - or is he smirking? sneering? - and...and...

It stings, is her immediate reaction.

For the longest time, she’d wanted him to take a hint. But if she had known this was how he’d react, she’d rather live a life having him oblivious of her emotional struggle. Dealing with that is more tolerable than witnessing him gaze her down in blatant mockery. He sneers as though he’s about to crack a joke and move on and forget such a laughable matter. That’s the last form of acknowledgment she wants for her honest feelings.

Heartbreak and shame and pain build up in her chest like a volcano closing eruption. Water begins to cloud her vision. She clenches her fist tight on her umbrella and Shinichi notices, and he takes another step forward.

“Ran…?”

“I am not, and you’re a fool.”

In a span of a breath, she’s sprinting in the opposite direction, tracing the path where they have walked, ignoring the distant yells of her name behind her. She runs and runs, and as she runs farther, with her thoughts muddy and breath short and dry, she wonders if she may have overreacted.

If he’s done that on purpose, screw him. If not, screw her.

After all, they are merely friends and she has no logical reason to act this way.

“Stop... running... will you!”

She hears heavy footsteps close in. It takes all the energy Ran has to prevent herself from turning her body around but his strong grip overpowers her.

“Let me go!”

“Why are you running?!”

“I can’t...deal with you!”

“Why? Was I right?”

“Right or wrong, it doesn’t matter!”

“Why doesn’t it matter?”

“Because I am your best friend!”

On another occasion, she would’ve successfully jilted away and run farther, but Ran is floored when he yanks her into a one-armed hug, so floored she drops her umbrella to the snowy ground.

“Stop saying that!” he hisses in her ear, frustration apparent.

“What are you— Let me go!”

He hugs her tighter.

“If you don’t let go in three seconds, I will screa—”

“I am happy!”

Ran stops struggling, eyes widening in shock.

Icy huffs tickle her neck as he half shouts, “I’m happy you feel that way!”

“You’re...You’re happy because I’m suffering?”

“What? No! I—”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better? How?” The hurt in her tone is impeccable, prattling muffled against his chest as she spares him no moment to butt in. “You think I wanted to feel this? That I enjoy griping in helpless jealousy? And you’re rejoicing that I am? How full of yourself can you be?!”

“That’s not...You don’t underst—”

“I do understand! I understand that I am so incredibly stupid for catching this disgusting heap of emotions for an obnoxious, stuck-up deduction maniac that is my best friend and maybe it’s better after all that he never, ever sees me the way I see him!”

“Stop saying that, Ran!”

She thinks he has broken away, but he drags her back with an insistent tug, crashing his lips onto hers as she stumbles into his arms.

All willpower rippling through her disintegrates quickly like snow in high heat.

An impatient pop resonates as he separates, eyes slowly opening, breath thick and ragged.

“I know that is not how we explain things, but does that explain anything?”

She hears it. The madness. But more than madness, yearning bleeds through his voice so much that her frustration turns into physical pain. Blinded by an all-consuming ache, she tips her chin and presses her lips back against his, demanding for cure in the wrong place. Shinichi freezes, then relaxes. He moves his hand to her nape, four fingers in her hair, thumb treading her jaw.

They look like a scene in a movie.

Under his umbrella and hidden from view, they communicate through brushing lips and tilting heads. His mouth closing over hers with gentle force, her hands splaying across his chest, heavy with something that makes his heart pound under them.

She is so lost in the chase and his tender embrace that for a second she forgets she is kissing her best friend.

Best friend.

This doesn’t explain anything. It worsens it.

She pulls back, ending what she has so recklessly started. “N-no, I’m— No.”

She pushes him away, gathers the stuff she drops, and runs without looking back.

“Ran!”

He shouts her name. Twice.

On the third call, his footfalls die down. On the fourth, he stops running.

She doesn’t.

Thirty minutes before midnight, Ran stands outside his gate, boots buried half foot under the snow as she rings his intercom for the second time, thinking to herself how foolish she must be to cut communications with him for a week and then show up his doorstep looking miserable like a stood-up date.

It’s the start of winter break.

He’ll leave for Akita in ten hours.

She needs to give his Christmas present before his departure.

She’s crazy, pathetic, still frustrated, and hurtfully in love.

“Oi. You better have a good explanation for why you’re buzzing at goddamn midnig—”

“Shinichi.”

His surprised gasp is apparent even through the intercom. A rustle follows and with a croaky voice, he responds. “...Ran.”

Surely he isn’t expecting this. Not after the tantrum she threw days ago. He probably thinks she hates him more than ever. But what she truly feels is more overwhelming than all negative emotions combined, and may god grant her all the strength to address it all, tonight.

“May I come in?”

“The house is—The house is a mess I, um. I’m packing my stuff for...”

“I’ll help you.”

“...”

She’ll understand if he decides to turn her down. But the answer that follows the deafening pause is a low and quiet ‘Okay’.

Despite psyching herself hours before she came, courage wanes when he opens the front door and gate in his pullovers. She is welcomed in, and the trip up his room is wordless. Shinichi only talks when he points out that he’s already packed clothes for two days and will need help for two weeks’ worth. He lamely laughs when he instructs her to pick the tops and layers, and he’ll take care of the pants and underwear.

On a normal instance, she would’ve humored him and they would’ve been talking right after. Now she simply pulls an empty smile and then they fall back into silence.

She supposes he’s trying to act unbothered, to treat what happened a week ago as a one-and-done glitch in their friendship, never to be discussed again. She cannot fault him when she’s trying to do the same. But it’s not easy when in the stillness of the night the echo of their altercation howls, raging persistently in their ears.

What has he been thinking of for the past week?

Has he been kept up all night by the words she said and the words he left unspoken?

Are they still friends? Will they still be friends after this?

The kiss... What about the kiss?

So many questions. So little words. So little time.

Ran is seated on the floor, folding shirts and stuffing them neatly in his duffel bag. Her back faces Shinichi who is sorting out bottoms in his cabinet. She senses him sit on the floor, back against her but not touching. Neither dares to speak first.

A ringing phone cuts the silence.

“Mm, still awake. Good for two weeks right? Gotcha. No, I’ll meet you girls at the station, no need to fetch me. Pfft. I can walk. Ok, see you tomorrow.”

If Ran wasn’t so hyperaware of where she is and what she’s done, her mood would’ve shifted to the one she’d been trying to avoid. Now isn’t the time to think about that. Midnight sneaking out to go to his house is something she wouldn’t do even on good days. She scans her bag on the far couch, deliberately bringing a bigger one to hide his gift. Maybe she can just sneak it in his bag and leave once she’s done and he’ll discover it only when he’s prefectures away. Brown has always suited him, and he’ll definitely find the overcoat useful as spare protective gear.

That’s right. She always cares for him like this. She is his best friend first, and... and nothing second.

“Don’t just leave after putting your present in my bag. At this hour, I can’t let you walk home alone,” he says swiftly.

Ran’s eyes fly wide.

“How did you…”

He doesn’t say anything and continues with his business.

Again with the throat-drying silence.

Something in Ran’s gut compels her to speak, but she is surprised when he does first.

“I... I don’t like Kaori-san. If that’s what you’re thinking.”

Ran stiffens, pausing mid-motion from folding. “I’m not…”

He leans his back completely against her and she shudders, voice reverberating through her skin. “Ran, if you could just hear me out.”

Unable to talk and move, she does.

“Kaori-san and the rest... They know I love mysteries. They know I want to build my own private detective agency. They know my favorite Holmes’ story is The Sign of Four. They know how many crimes I solved in Tokyo. All the information about me which anyone can read from the internet and newspaper and from what I told them when they ask, they know. Ran, you know all that. All that and more.”

He angles his head to the ceiling as if he’s talking to someone there. Ran supports his weight, curling to her knees as she silently listens.

“You know of my first ever deduction because Christ, my first deduction was about you. You know of the two cases which haunt me until this day because I watched the culprit die in front of my very eyes. You were with me the nights I locked myself in here thinking about them. You know of the interesting, the boring, the absurd cases, everything, because I told you or you were there. You know of the odd way I play the violin while I ponder over a case. You know I forget to eat when swamped with new books to read. I have three copies of The Sign of Four but the one I keep beside my bed and read almost weekly is the one you gave me on my tenth birthday and that is all I need. You know me for me, Ran. Everything about me that is off the record, the good and the bad, you know all of those. Only you. The same way I do... about you.”

She feels him crane slightly to the side, addressing her.

“Ran.”

“Mm.”

“I love you.”

Ran’s heart almost completely stops beating.

“I love you,” he whispers, “more than I am even supposed to.”

All words seem to have fizzled out of her vocabulary as she sits still, stunned at what she’s hearing.

“I’m happy growing up with you, studying with you, bickering with you, acting stupid with you, investigating with you, eating with you, napping with you, hugging you, holding you, taking care of you, simply... being with you. Before I know it, it’s not the cases or Holmes or mysteries that complete my days, it’s you.

“For you to keep repeating that ‘best friend’ phrase, I…” He lowers his head.

“For who knows how long, I’ve loved you as that and more.”

Someone pinch her because in no way can this be real.

“I was happy thinking you’re jealous because it meant a sliver of chance you feel the same way. We could’ve remedied the misunderstanding easily, Ran. We could’ve talked it over like we always do. But I was stupid and emotions were high and in the end I… kissed you…” he takes another deep breath, “But—but you kissed me back, and my heart couldn’t stay still...”

Pulse drumming loud, Ran tilts her head on the side where he leans, wanting to see the slightest expression he makes as he continues.

“If my deductions are wrong and you’re mad for a different reason, and—and you returned that for a different reason...” she hears the pang of remorse in his tone, “then please forget I ever said anything and I’ll leave myself to die in humiliation once I’m out of your sight.”

He lays one palm flat on the floor and she notices.

“But if my deductions are right and you were indeed jealous, I...” She feels his head swivel enough to feel his warm breath fan across her cheek, before shifting back front and releasing a slow, guttural exhale he’s kept contained within.

“I’ll wait... until you accept it. Accept me.”

Ran may have choked on her throat for how long she’s held her breath.

In spite of herself, she knows she doesn’t need to think of what to say. She had it all in her head before coming here. Yet expressing it out loud is a different matter.

She isn’t ready, but when will she ever be ready? Shinichi undoubtedly isn’t too. Yet here he is, laying the groundwork for her, no holds barred and a stuttering mess at that. How she plans to build from it is the question she asks herself next.

Inhaling as though bracing herself, she places a hand beside him, pinky slightly grazing his.

“I didn’t... You never showed any signs.”

Careful and calm, he extends his little finger over hers. She doesn’t flinch, and both hands crawl closer until two fingers overlap.

“Either I’m a great pretender or you’re incredibly dense.”

“I’m...I’m not dense.”

“I’m a bad actor, then.” He slides his hand further.

“I was trying so hard to be a supportive best friend for you.”

“I sensed that but ignored it because I didn’t want to assume anything.”

“You did though. Now we’re here.”

“Would you rather we aren’t?”

“I would rather we spend the last weeks of this year talking like normal than being stupid idiots before you leave.”

“It’s just two weeks, Ran.”

“Two special weeks I would’ve wanted to spend with my best frien-... with you.”

Without knowing it, his hand has completely nestled atop hers, four fingers curled between her thumb and index finger.

“Ran... You must really hate the idea of falling in love with me.”

“Eh?”

“You’re so wrapped with the thought that we’re simply best friends that you hold your love in chains as though it isn’t permitted to grow.”

“I… I didn’t want to ruin the only connection we have-”

“Two friends falling in love are still friends… They are also more. You cannot ruin an indefeasible connection. Friendship and love may be the only bond we have, but they’re the most important bond of all.”

Ran falls quiet.

“Geez…”

He releases a thick sigh, brushes his thumb across her splayed fingers.

“I have shit art appreciation skills, but I can take you to museums too... as a friend and as a date.” A beat, and a mumble. “Even to better museums than Tokyo Metropolitan Art Museum.”

She darts her head sideways, realizing something.

“Were you also…?”

“No.”

Ran doesn’t suppress the heartfelt giggle that bubbles out.

“Shun-san has a boyfriend, Shinichi.”

“I—” he pauses. “I wasn’t asking.” Ran giggles more.

“Shinichi.”

“Yes.”

“I love you too.”

The hand above squishes hers all too suddenly like he’s been blown away and is needing something to hold onto.

“I came here to give your present and to apologize for being so shallow and for acting without thinking and for a lot of things actually... but now I feel there’s no need, because then I wouldn’t have...” She looks down at their intertwined hands.

Before she can return his squeeze, he recoils.

“Oh, y-you do apologize. Running away like that.” He coughs, and she can practically hear the tripping in his tone.

“Aren’t you already used to it? I’ve done it many times,” she chides.

“No. Apologize,” he insists. “And look at me while you do.”

Ran’s stomach twists, heart kicking up a step.

It’s easy to talk without eye contact, but to be requested so after confessions are exchanged—

“Face me, Ran.”

The familiar voice of yearning strums her heartstrings, tone sounding a lot like a plea than an order and Ran finds her head instinctively craning at an angle, hand coiling on the floor trying to calm her nervous beating heart. She feels him shift behind as well.

She takes all her time to face him, partly unsure what to do, partly knowing exactly what she wants to do. Despite the deliberate slowness of their movements, it is when they lock eyes that time truly seems to stop.

Shinichi appears so different, so soulful. His blue irises glimmering, fixated on nothing but her as she reveres him with matching intensity. The same guy she treats as her best friend looks at her with tender love in his eyes, darting down her lips and up like no best friend ever would.

“I love you,” he says, breathless. “Make me your boyfriend.”

A wave of emotion sweeps over her, heartbeat fluttering in overdrive as they huddle on the floor, bags and clothes and time forgotten.

“From best friend to... such a shift-”

“Nothing will be different.” He rests his forehead on hers, gaze of soft blue patient though more intimate now, knowing what they share is mutual. “We’ll still do what we do... With exclusive romantic commitment and sweet nothings that translate to ‘I love you’ in more ways than one.”

She attempts a jab on his chest but he catches her fist, soft but jesting beam all too apparent and she does but play along.

“What about when we fight?” she asks.

“Same. But...” he slides a thumb over her quiet lips, parting them slightly, “I can do this once we make up.”

“...Like right now?”

“Like right now.”

A genuine smile is the last thing she sees before delicate pair of lips lands on hers, capping their one-week fight and their last night of the year together in the best and most unexpected way imaginable.

Ran keeps telling herself she shouldn’t be jealous.

Not because they are simply best friends, because they aren’t. Not because life would be easier if she didn’t involve herself in his business twenty-four seven, because it wouldn’t.

Not because Shinichi doesn’t look at her that way, because he does.

She shouldn’t be jealous because she absolutely has no reason to, is all.

“I haven’t forgotten about your present. I was planning to buy yours in Akita.”

“Stop lying, you totally forgot it.”

“I didn’t. Stop that.” Half-mast eyes rake her side profile, and Ran covers a mirthful grin with her mitted hand holding the umbrella, then yawns. Hours of packing and talking and laughing left them with roughly four hours of sleep. It isn’t like she slept the whole period because while sleeping in his room isn’t new, cuddling while they sleep is. Ran couldn’t simply shut her eyes and heart to that.

“I believe though,” he wraps a hand around her free one, pocketing both of them in his brand new overcoat, “I gave half of my present already.”

“Hnn. That doesn’t count as a gift.” Her hand shifted, coddling his own to a warm fit.

“Really?” A smug smirk pulls up his face. “I believe I am a nice present, Ran. That’s why they—”

“Screw this. You are unbelievable. A humbug. Why do people like you.”

“I know. Why do you like me?” Shinichi laughs as he avoids the swing of her umbrella.

From afar, they see Kaori and the girls at the meet-up point outside Tokyo Station, though they seem unaware of their presence yet. Suddenly feeling conscious, Ran feels the urge to disentangle her hand, but Shinichi holds on, firm.

“Why?” He asks in a low voice.

“I dunno… maybe this isn’t the best time…”

“Isn’t now the best time?” His smile is proud and natural, not one ounce of reluctance visible.

Although she gets what he means, that doesn’t free her of shyness and guilt. Somehow she feels like apologizing to Kaori for… she doesn’t know. She just wants to. Letting her see them like this makes her think that she’s giving her an indirect slap on the face. Shinichi certainly won’t agree because ‘What’s with women and their logic?’, but still, whether or not it’s all in her head, Ran needs more time to prepare for this.

But to her surprise, Shinichi lets go of her hand. They are still a few feet from view when he steps in front of her and turns around. “Maah, fine, I get it,” he huffs, then smiles. “Then, just give me your umbrella.”

The moment she does, Shinichi closes their distance and dips his face onto hers. Ran is given no leeway to gasp as loving lips seal her quiet. It isn’t as long as what they shared a week ago, but the emotions are loaded and full, speaking fond thanks and temporary farewell.

She doesn’t realize she has closed her eyes until he separates, and she’s met with the most tender, most angelic expression he wears only on the rarest occasions. He’s saying without telling that her feelings are valid, she doesn’t have to worry, and he doesn’t have eyes for anyone but her. Somehow, the snow is the sea and fish are swarming around but neither cares because they have already caught each other.

“You don’t have to, silly.” Three layers of pink blanket Ran’s puffy cheeks.

“But I want to.” Grinning, Shinichi hands her back the umbrella. “You don’t like hand-holding. You don’t like being seen. Don’t you think that’s a great compromise?”

“Idiot, many people saw...”

“No, they didn’t!” Upping the duffel bag slung on his shoulder, he steps back and gives her one last goofy beam. “I’ll see you next year, Ran. I’ll call as often as I can.”

Wordlessly, Ran watches Shinichi’s back as he jogs to his waiting companions, who by then have already had their eyes pinned on the approaching figure.

“That is Shinichi-kun! ...And Mouri-san!”

“Ehhh!!?! You’re a thing!”

So much for being subtle, Ran flushes inwardly as she returns the wave the other girls are giving her. At that moment she really does feel immature for her past conduct. All of them are sweet. Even Kaori.

“I knew it Shinichi-kun! Mouri-san is sooo lucky, I’m so jealous!” Ran hears their banter and sees her jab his bicep before acknowledging her. “We’ll take care of him, Mouri-san!”

The Ran from one week ago would’ve had her heart crushed by such declaration, but now she’s nothing but pleased and the smile that forms across her lips is nothing but honest. “Make sure he doesn’t drag your group into a random dead body, Kaori-san!”

“Hey!” surfaces Shinichi’s shout amidst the mincing laughter of the group and the onlooking passers-by, and Ran bids her last wave before they enter the station.

Smiling to herself, Ran returns home, the lingering promise of his kiss committed to memory, knowing that she doesn’t have to get jealous because she has no reason to. Their indefeasible bond is all the assurance she needs.

#shinran #kiss prompts #fanfic #lmk anon(s) if you see this and if you do then yaaay #thank you for requesting!#and thank you for reading!#:')#I have a love-hate relationship with this fic #it's only supposed to be 4 scenes #oh well it is what it is lmao #it's ok ig since this is the last (awww) from the kiss prompts!#😌#I tried so hard with a jealous Ran haha #jealous fics are good reads but writing them is hard :O

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hoodoo12 · 3 years

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Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa

Hold up, hold up there-- Someone’s salty.

(mixing fandoms there, but it’s the indomitable Alex Brightman so it’s okay)

@my-name-is-louise won’t be directed to this post; I can’t tag her because she has me blocked. It did come to my attention, however, that she made a post filled with lies, ‘tagged’ me specifically in it, and insulted a large group in this fandom.

Here is a screenshot of her post (again, can’t reblog because of the aforementioned blockage):

Let’s break this down, shall we?

1) Howard Phillips Lovecraft was a racist and anti-Semitic. Yes on all counts. Even trying to use the “he was a product of his time” argument doesn’t hold water. His personal views were horrible now and they were horrible then. I don’t know anyone who stans the man’s personality as an idol, and not only was I reading Lovecraft before you were born, I belong to multiple Lovecraft fanclubs and groups. We admire the Lovecraft’s ability to world-build and create horror (along with others, such Robert Chambers, an author who influenced him) that was beyond the scope of human- or folklore-based terror. His fiction created a legacy that extends to this day. Hell, I just watched a movie last night called Underwater that was one of the most recent films drawing heavy inspiration from his work.

People that I know don’t stan HP Lovecraft. It’s complex, but we can love what he contributed to the field of horror and dislike the man personally. That’s actually a thing that can happen, unlike you who seems to only see things THIS WAY or THAT WAY.

Most people in this fandom aren’t Lovecraft fans. They may not even know about him, or Lovecraftian/cosmic/weird horror. Some do, and they created art and stories featuring aspects of it.

I, however, gave Beetlejuice tentacles based on the fact that the DC run of the musical had his name as “Lawrence Shoggoth Betelgeuse” and Juno was “Juno Shoggoth”. The writers took inspiration from Lovecraft’s creations, and I ran with it because you know what? I like tentacles and other people like tentacles. It’s fun and fits into the musical’s canon.

2) Some people hc Musical Beetlejuice as Jewish and/or gay. Or bi. Or pan. Or ace. Or trans. Or female. Other people do not. He is a fictional character. He can be anything anyone wants to imagine. Since you’ve got a hate on for me, I’ll state I have never in my own personal works said Musical Beetlejuice was Jewish or gay. That does not mean I try to force other people to accept my hcs as the only ones that are correct. Gatekeeping this fandom is your hill to die on, not mine.

3) Neither Burton or Keaton created Beetlejuice, but Lovecraft did. What the actual fuck are you talking about? Literally no one has ever claimed this. This may make sense in your head, but trust me, it’s dumb as fuck.

4) My tiny clique of idiots! I don’t think I’ve laughed so hard at anything for a while reading that, till I got to your next couple of libelous insults. I really, really want to tag that “tiny clique of idiots” but Tumblr has a line limit on posts. Don’t worry! I will be putting a link to this in the Beetlejuice discord servers I belong to so everyone can enjoy your unfounded, lying hate.

5) My ignorance is offensive. I don’t know what ignorance you’re specifically talking about (I’ll assume you think you “schooled” me on the Lovecraft stuff because you’re already an ass). Your random bursts of hate are offensive. Your lack of anything creative or constructive to the fandom is offensive.

6) I objectify gay people. Uh . . . what? This one I really would like a reply to because . . . what?

7) I’m a bigot in Woke clothing. Nope. Being “woke” directly counters your libel that I’m a Nazi. You might want to actually look up the definition of bigot, because it’s suspiciously close to your attitude for others in this fandom.

8) Eat shit. Nah. What I am going to do is see Alex Brightman talk about tentacles later today (which he knows is from me) and write more on the rps I’m doing with friends. They all feature Beetlejuice and they all have tentacles in them! Good times.

In all honesty and all snarkiness aside, this musical and the part of the fandom that came from it seems to make you so angry because it is not what you want and you simply cannot understand that people from all over the world were brought together by it. People have fun together and are creating and for some reason that personally offends you. You can’t “find your tribe” because you’re combative and both cannot see past your own ideas of the character and are too rigid to even accept that other people like something you do not.

I feel sorry for you.

#discourse #discourse made personal #Beetlejuice #Alex Brightman #HP Lovecraft #lies and hate #libel #Louise discourse

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sailorspazz · 3 years

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Remote 10 Dance Ball

I know this is coming way late (as in, 3 months after it occurred!), but I’d always been planning to write up a report about the Real 10 Dance event that took place shortly after vol. 6’s release in Japan. Before I get into the explanation of what exactly this is under the cut, enjoy this promo image that ticket holders were able to print out at Japanese convenience stores (mine had to be printed by friends who live there and then scanned to me)

The Real 10 Dance is a series of events that have taken place over the past few years featuring real life pros performing routines inspired by the manga, meaning that most of the dances feature male-male couples (though they all have female partners in their regular careers, for these performances they dance together, and the women are given a group number to perform). The most recent live event took place in September 2019 shortly after vol. 5’s release, and there was another planned for 2020 in Osaka, but it was delayed and eventually completely canceled due to Covid restrictions. Wanting to still put on the event in some form, they later announced that it would take place virtually, and would be branded as the Remote 10 Dance Ball. For the cost of 1,000 yen, viewers could watch a stream of the event as many times as they pleased from the time it went live on March 20 until the viewing deadline 72 hours later. Unlike the in person events, there were no merchandise buying opportunities, but there was the option of paying additional 1,000 yen tips to either the performers, the production committee, or Inouesatoh herself. Choosing any of these options would give that ticket holder access to a code to print the postcard shown above, as well as a link to view a 17 minute making-of video of the event.

Before I get into the rundown, The Real 10 Dance Twitter account posted a preview video a couple weeks before the event, which you can watch if you’d like to see some of the action instead of just still images (and the only ones I’ll share here are those that were posted publicly, since they were pretty adamant about no screenshotting/recording of the event…not gonna lie, I did attempt to screenshot a couple parts, but due to the shaky streaming quality, the official photos are much better than what I was able to capture anyway :P) Also, I only made bare minimum notes while I was watching this (and was drinking hard cider), so I’ll give as much detail as I can remember, but there are definitely things I’ll have forgotten by now.

The show started off with one of the female pros giving a demonstration of how to apply makeup for competitions. After this came an introductory show with all of the participants dancing to the opening theme from La La Land.

Next up was some of the pros talking about the characteristics of their costumes, such as the Latin outfits having features like illusion netting to make their limbs look longer, and fringe to create movement.

After this, some of the pros gave tours of the dance schools that they run, which also served as advertisements for those who may be interested in signing up for lessons.

Then came some step demonstrations, showing specific panels from the manga and then describing how to perform the moves. This included Al and Suzuki’s rumba walk from chapter 18, and the throwaway oversway from the chapter 4 scene where Sugiki turns Suzuki into a princess. For the oversway, they performed the move a few different times, using prompts such as “do it like the world’s about to end” to show how the same move can feel very different depending on the emotion behind it.

This was followed by an interview with former standard world champion Christopher Hawkins. The interview was conducted in Japanese, as he is fluent in the language (Inouesatoh tweeted about him being the inspiration to have Norman speak some Japanese in the story, though she acknowledged that Chris’ abilities are far above Norman’s very basic phrases). It included two interviewers asking questions that were submitted by Inouesatoh and her editor. It started off with some basic talk about the process of training and getting prepared for competitions, then moved on to topics like whether he had any competition related superstitions/habits, such as how some dancers will have a pair of lucky underwear they always wear when competing. He said he had a specific order to how he would button his shirt and attach his cufflinks (as in, not just going straight up or down, but skipping over some and coming back to them), and if he didn’t do this specific routine it made him feel like the competition would go poorly. After telling this story, he laughed and said that he’s never told anyone about this before, so it was definitely an interesting question. Then came probably the most important question for fans of 10 Dance: since the series centers around men dancing together, what sort of experience does Chris have dancing with other men? (Funnily enough, for some reason, the male interviewer first asked this question in Japanese, then rather enthusiastically asked the question in English as well lol). Chris said that of course he’s danced with male students a lot in the course of teaching them, but outside of that also had times where he would train in the female role so he knew how it felt to be the following partner, and therefore could become a better lead. He mentioned some performance he did with another high level male dancer that was pretty amazing (forgive me, I didn’t catch the name at all, or even whether he was a standard or Latin specialist), which caused the female interviewer to joke about writing a love story about the two of them.

Then came the main draw of the event, the dance show! I’ll include the song, dance style, and an image from each performance below.

One Way or Another by Blondie, jive

Lady Marmalade (I believe it was the Moulin Rouge movie version), ladies group cha-cha

Half of Me by Ken Hirai, rumba (I don’t know if it’s just because it made me think of the melancholy rumba shown on vol. 6’s cover, but this made me both want to cry and watch it multiple times over, definitely my favorite because apparently I like to punish myself with sadness :P)

All of Me by Michael Bublé, foxtrot (this was filmed both in the performance space and out on the streets in one of the locations used in chapter 33, as shown in this video from one chilly looking morning. Also, this dance featured a leader switch partway through!)

If I Can’t Have You by Shawn Mendes, cha-cha

Finale with all participants to It’s Time to Dance from “The Prom” musical

Last up was a virtual art exhibition featuring 17 sketches by Inouesatoh, including the most powerful sexual stimulant in the known universe, Bathrobe Sugiki.

Overall, I was very happy to get the chance to witness this event. Normally, the number of people would be limited to just those who were in Japan and able to purchase tickets before they sold out, but this remote version allowed a much larger number of people from all over the world to watch (I bought my ticket not even knowing if it would be region locked or not, but thankfully it wasn’t). I hope that the world situation improves and they can put on the event live and in-person again (even better if I could somehow find a way to attend when that happens!), but I think this was a great alternative, and probably a good way to make some revenue in a time when the ability to stage events is limited. The price of 1,000 yen was an incredibly good deal for all the content that was presented (and you better believe I slammed an extra 1,000 straight to Inouesatoh; the only merch I’ve been able to buy is secondhand, and while this satisfies my needs as a collector, it unfortunately doesn’t provide any support to the author). If real life performances are still a long way off and they decide to do a virtual one again, you bet your ass I’ll be right there in the (imaginary) front row!

#10 dance #10dance

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lethendralis-paints · 3 years

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Hey Lethy,

Hopefully this is the last question for awhile. As I learn the basics of drawing people I’m starting to think about art style. I guess I’m having a hard time finding something I want to model(?) mine after. I see multiple art styles I really love. Some more cartoony and others more realistic like yours. But I’ve also been crazy over the art style in Hades. There are too many I really like. But I’m also worried I might not be able to change it if I don’t like it. That probably sounds crazy though.

I guess I’m asking how do you pick.

Thanks again for so much help!

Heya, anonymous friend!

Oooooh, that’s an awesome question and one I’ve been mulling over myself a lot!

Long-winded answer and ramblings are under the cut.

1) Artistic style musings.

After careful consideration, I came to the conclusion I was being held back in my progress for years due to unconsciously imitating anime style of drawing, just by virtue of me watching a lot of it in my formative years and drawing fan art. I never had formal artistic education, so it was up to me to get a grip, kick my own ass and sit down and study the fundamentals properly.

Which is exactly what I’ve been doing in the last couple of years (you can observe the progression if you skim my blog here btw).

A seasoned professional artist told me, without mincing words, that you should first get a firm understanding of fundamentals - perspective, figure drawing drawing from reference, understanding how light works, values and so on, before attempting stylisation, or else, in their own words, you’ll end up on shit street in terms of style. And I tend to agree with this thought, as no amount of flashy stylisation will be able to hide one’s lack of understanding of basic principles of drawing.

One mistake that me and countless other beginner artists made, was focusing too much on polishing a fundamentally flawed drawing in hopes of making it better. And the harsh truth is, no amount of detailing and hours of blending or shading will make up for botched proportions, lack of perspective or unsorted values. :/

So, personally, I don’t worry much about style yet and just focus on learning the basics. As soon as I started to do that, genuine improvement began and my own recognisable style began to from on its own, which I’m proud of. Have you noticed the same happening in your own studies, I wonder?

2) Hades game - I really like that game’s style as well. But if you look closely, this heavy stylised approach is grounded on solid knowledge of anatomy, composition, colour theory and so on. If you try to copy without knowing why the artists working on that game made these particular stylistic choices, you’ll end up with a blander version of their drawings. Keep in mind, that different stylistic choices apply to different themes. What works for comic book hero art is completely useless in, say, portraiture. So sticking to it will inevitably limit your visual vocabulary. So, again, working on studying drawing fundamentals is key to developing a versatile toolset as an artist (sorry for being boring and hammering this point down).

3) Picking a style - for now, if you noticed, I have 2 or 3 stylistic approaches I switch between while working. Heavily stylised, sketchy/cartoony one for when I doodle for fun, like here:

A detailed and clean storybook illustration style, which is my personal comfort zone, as I find it very pleasurable and relaxing to do character design and render all of the small details:

And a painterly style that’s not dependent on line art, but more on capturing forms, proportions and values right and one that challenges me the most:

Hope that was helpful! Do remember that you can always jump into my DM’s or on Discord to talk art more, as it makes me very happy to share what I’m learning!

#long post #Anonymous #ask lethy a question #developing an art style

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char-lotteral · 3 years

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Look I'm not one of those people who believe Kishimoto decided to have Hinata and Naruto end up in the middle part of Shippuden. I believe he decided in the very last arc but he wanted to sound smart so he said he decided earlier on. Otherwise, they obviously would have more scene together. In Shippuden, they have only three scenes together ; when Naruto came back, the pain attack and the neji death scene. That's it. In the original Naruto, they probably have less than ten canon scenes not including fillers.

So I'm sorry I'm one of those who wasn't convinced by The Last. They literally had a basic villain go after Hinata who was cringe btw (the villain). They gave Hinata op powers which she doesn't have in the novel 👀. Despite having op powers, they made her the damsel in distress. Very "The hero saves the princess" cliche. Again, to justify them being together. I mean Naruto can't differentiate his love for ramen and romantic love so how??? He was just being nice to Hinata just like he does to everyone. He stood up for her just like he does for everyone.

Don't get me started on the Sakura Sasuke relationship 🤣. Cringe. They never knew each other. The whole Sakura's love for Sasuke saved him doesn't make sense. They spent barely a year in their genin year before sasuke left. Sasuke tried to kill Naruto and Sakura multiple times. Then at the end of the war, Kishimoto tried to do the "oh they have such a deep understanding between each other" which comes off as cringey. He gets her pregnant then leaves for years. She's literally a single mom who's broke.

Every relationship in Naruto is so cringey and forced except shikatemari. Kishimoto should've focused on the main story and fixed his potholes and leave the ending open.

Naruto would not have been perfect but at least it would've been remembered for staying true to its vision but instead it's remembered for cringey relationships, dumbass villain (except pain and madara) and a story that lost its core which is a shame coz I used to love Naruto. I was inspired by its messages but now....

OKAY LOL WAIT I ACTUALLY HAVE THIS LONG ASS RANT PREPARED XD

BUT FIRST Ive read what you said and I lowkey agree :p

HOWEVER

I DRAW THE LINE AT TONERI SLANDER. BECAUSE WHY

TONERI?? CRINGE?? THIS SEXY MOTHERFUCKER??

LOOK AT HIS WHITE FLUFFY HAIR AND HIS CERULEAN BLUE ORBS STARING DEEPLY INTO YOUR SOUL

SAY SIKE RIGHT NOW?!#*@*#&@*

okay lol now for the juicy part click readmore and beware I shall be brutally honest so yea enjoy

I mean, Naruto in general is a mess, not just the ships if we're being realistic. Alot of plotholes, rushed endings, this and that, the w a r a r c, Kaguya, the way they rushed Boruto ehhh. Honestly, getting into Naruto is literally my biggest regret of 2020 :"DD

Im an NH shipper as you can tell by my hotmess of a blog but i fully respect your opinion and understand your point of view. I also know a bunch of nh stans who have their complaints with their development. I wish Kishi gave more attention to his female cast really, thats all I fucking ask. If he did that one single basic thing, then maybe the endgame relationships wouldnt have been an asspull and theyd be given propper screentime with their love interest, both Sakura and Hinata. The Last tbh i think the writers played it safe and stuck to the whole Naruto shounen vibe thingy, so im not surprised it was plotted that way. Typical cliché shounen movie.

But does that bother me? No! The Last was a mess, their development was shit, they definitely needed more screentime but hey at the end of the day theyre cute as fuck, we have that kiss scene, flirting scenes, a shit ton of official art, three kids, Seiki's gif :33 and a whole ass arc for their wedding all that for just a shounen anime so eh. Compensates for it i guess xD theyre not toxic, unhealthy or whatnot. Theyre wholesome, soft and vanilla as fuck and exactly what i need in my hectic life rn. No drama, just two kind souls who are adorable as heck and theyre dynamic means so much to me and I will love them until i shall leave this earth.

Anon, im not even gonna waste my time and defend their development because i think it sucked too xD but if you wanna know why i love them so so so soooo much, Id be more than willing to tell you :33

Sasuke and Sakura on the other hand eeeehhhh i can see why people like them. Sasuke's hot, he's your typical hot bad boy aad Sakura's hot and pretty too. Basic blue and pink trope. Aside from their canon interactions, fans have all the opportunity to play around with their dynamic but for me, its just sooo basic and so hetero and can easily appeal to any 16 yr old teenage girl, no wonder it has an active fanbase on twt and---- AM I MAKING ANY SENSE? AHDBAJJE LIKE ITS SO-- BASIC, your usual bad boy x pretty girl trope that you get to read in YA and coming of age novels. Not only that, but going back to canon, they have too many negative interactions for me to like them together :p The least Sakura can do is put down her own foot and yell at him for not contacting them for god knows how long. I also dont like how he always gets easily forgiven >=[[. I mean at least He's compensating as a dad good for him but ehhhh i still dont like him and Sakura together :v And im not falling for that "Sakura is the reason why Sasuke isnt lonely anymore" because thats NARUTO AHHH. Sasuke said that Multiple times. HE LIGHTS A FIRE INSIDE OF ME. HES MY SUN. MY ONE AND ONLY FRIEND. LIEK?? THATS NARUTOOO romantic or not, Naruto was the reason for his not so lonely existence anymore smh >=[[

Sasuke almost murdered her and Naruto and made their lives a living hell but hey its all good!! He's my best friend and Sakura loves him!! So set him freeee into the worldddd~~

Sasuke left his family without even simply contacting them but can easily contact Naruto through a hawk but hey thats fine! His and Sakura's feelings are connected afterall! Sasuke gave her a ring and said thank you! Who cares about leaving your family. She loves him and he loves her so yey!!! All is forgiven :D

DID I MENTION SASUKE ALMOST MUREDERED HIS OWN DAUGHTER AND HE WASNT CALLED OUT FOR THAT@*#&@??!?#,*@#,#

Sasuke gets too many life points this isnt fair >=[[ But tbh he's nerfed so bad in Boruto manga and anime power wise. Like in that time travel arc and the manga. The rinnegan kunai thing was still so funny to me even if it was Borushiki. I just idk its so funny to me lmaoo

OKAY WHAT ELSE. I dont even know any more. Im tired of complaining about Naruto and just when Ive finally gone a little bit away from Naruto, Hinata fucking pulls me in again 😩 she has me on chokehold pls send help. Watch castlevania!!! and one piece!!!! ten times better than this anime about a loud blonde boi who wants to be president. Trust me

overall, i dont fully agree but i lowkey agree i guess. I do respect your opinion tho :))

EXCEPT WHEN YOU CALLED TONERI CRINGE. HOW DARE YOU CALL THAT SEXY MF CRINGEY---

#like at this point if you complain about naruhina to me id probably complain along with you #but at the end of the day #i really do not care lol #theyre CUTE AS FUCK AND I WILL COMMIT MASS MURDER FOR THESE PRECIOUS KIDS AND WOULD NOT FEEL AN OUNCE OF REMORSE #also i have like zero energy to find all those manga panels and debunk shit and stuff #i just say the first thing that comes to my brain and fart it out on my lonely tumblr blog #anon #hey hey anon ask me about why i love naruhina so much come on come on *aggressively bounces knees*#unpopular opinions

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guessimjoiningthespidermanfandom · 3 years

Text

Hell and Back Pt. 2

Peter Parker x bisexual!reader

Peter Parker x fem!reader

Peter Parker x black!reader

Peter Parker x villain!reader

Warnings: Language, hospital mentions, mentions of drug abuse, allusions to suicide, allusion to self harm, self deprecating thoughts, a gun, mentions of knives, mentions of the dead, anxiety, signs of abuse, abusive and toxic relationships, and fainting.

Word Count: 6.1k

Songs: Pleaser-Wallows, 505-Artic Monkeys, Sweater Weather- The Neighborhood, Daddy Issues- The Neighborhood, Paper Planes- M.I.A, We come running- Youngblood Hawke, Young dumb and broke- Khalid, Do I wanna know- Artic Monkeys, Break the Rules- Charli XCX

“I smiled, I know as much as we get into petty arguments or try to annoy each other on purpose but I’d go to hell and back for those girls. And that’s exactly what I was going to do.”

A/N: There might be some typos and grammatical errors sorry for those, I you want to be added to the Taglist just message me about or comment it. I’ll have a google form for it soon.

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When I saw my little sisters, that all went away. Sure I still called them a lot but nothing could compare to actually seeing them in person. Sapphire launched herself into my arms and I stumbled back a bit.

“I missed you too,” I said.

I hugged Aaliyah too. When I entered the apartment I heard voices. My dad’s and some feminine voice.

I walked in to find some woman who couldn't be older than 25 in my kitchen. Talking and laughing with my dad. I didn’t want to assume anything or start a scene so I just went into my room to catch up with my sisters.

We were talking about some kid who gave me a DMT pen once and I was tripping balls which I probably shouldn’t be talking about, but I want them to feel comfortable enough to come to me. Makes it easier to keep them safe.

Our dad opened the door and hung in the doorway.

“Hey… Y/N do you mind coming here for a sec?”

“Yeah sure…”

I stepped out of the room.

“Is something wrong?” It wasn’t often that he initiated a conversation that would end positively.

“No,no, not at all, I just want you to meet someone,”

When I entered the kitchen the same woman from before was still there. My dad walked over to her and wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

“This is my girlfriend, Camilla”

I knew it . I knew it! I was trying not to be hostile toward her every problem I had was towards my dad so I smiled and waved to her.

“Camilla this is Y/N,” he pointed to me.

“Well I’ll let y’all get acquainted,” He said before leaving the room.

I sat on the kitchen island and waited for her to say something first.

“Look, I would just like to put it out there that I’m not trying to replace your mom in anyway.”

“Thanks I appreciate it,”

“Also, are you okay now?” She asked in a low voice.

“Huh?” I questioned.

“Your dad said you ran away,” Of course he did “and I saw the news with your school at the Washington Monument.” So I guess she knew more about me then expected. Not surprised she was the one to ask me and not my so called dad.

“Thanks for your concern but I’m fine, and sorry to cut this conversation short but I’m drained.”

“Oh, okay, have a nice night,”

“You, too,”

I didn’t have time to think about anything. I just made it back to my room and face planted onto my bed. My whole being was sore including my brain. I didn’t have the energy to change my clothes, to shower, to think about my dad being a pathological liar or anything else that happened today.

I was awoken by my dad. I didn't know how long I slept but the sun was out. I can’t remember the last time I was able to sleep while the sun was up.

“Hey we’re going out, for family bonding and I want you there with us,”

Family.

We ain’t ever been a family before why start now. Is what I really wanted to say but I sucked it up because again I hadn’t seen my sisters in a while.

The movie was really boring. If we’re being honest.

I pulled Aaliyah and Sapphire aside as my dad and Camilla were deep in conversation.

“You know how I was staying at Wade’s house right?”

They both nodded.

“What did dad tell you about this,”

Sapphire just shrugged and Aaliyah was the one to post.

“I dunno he didn’t say much like usual he just kinda said you just left,”

I felt my jaw tightening as I processed her words, my fist clenching by my side.

“Oh, oh okay,” I breathed in through my nose and out through my mouth a couple times “Well I just want you to know I’d never leave y’all without a very good reason, and I never won’t come back,”

By the time we got back to the house it was around twelve since we watched another movie and went to a restaurant. Then got ice cream. This is the most money my dad could’ve possibly spent on me in a long time. I mean he didn’t because I didn’t get anything and bought my own ticket. I didn’t want him to be able to use the fact he bought me stuff against me. I’d gotten tired of the “after I’ll I’ve done for you,” excuse.

I couldn’t sleep. No matter what I tried I couldn’t sleep. I tried NyQuil, melatonin, and even tea. The tea really did more harm than good.

This was an extremely stupid thing to do so don’t follow my lead but I was bored.

I grabbed a lot of useless shit from the floor of my room and made my way to the roof. I poured hand sanitizer on it and set it on fire. Putting aside the fact that it was really weird the fire was oddly beautiful. I sat there watching it for a minute before stomping it out.

I was going to text my friend Carmen but I realized she was supposed to be asleep and I didn’t want to get her in trouble.

I ended up scrolling through Zillow for a while then that turned into me applying for like four jobs. In which turned into me making spamming multiple friends saying we needed to hang out.

While I was on Zillow there was a relatively cheap apartment in Queens. Which was close to my school. It kept drawing me in for some reason. I bookmarked the tab.

Before I knew it the sun was up. I figured if I couldn’t sleep I would go on a walk to the park.

When I got back to the complex everyone was still asleep except my dad who walked outside like he was waiting on me. He grabbed my arm, squeezing it tightly.

He basically told me I looked like a prostitute. I was running so my sports bra and leggings were actually pretty appropriate. He said that I was probably going out to fuck people and that’s where I always was. I opened my mouth to defend myself.

“Actually I was just going to the-“ I was cut off by a sharp sting on my cheek.

He fucking slapped me. Hard at that. He then grabbed my arm even tighter than before dragging me into the house.

I don’t know what hurt worse my face or that fact that I wouldn’t be able to blame him being drunk on all the times he’d hit me before. He was just an ass.

By the time I made it back to my room it felt like my body was burning itself from the inside out. My face was red and so was my arm from my elbow to almost my wrist. To try to cool myself down I took a cold shower and took some Tylenol.

I still couldn’t sleep but tonight it was because it was so hot. I really needed a fan in my room. It was already 6 so I just decided to get a head start at the school. Not without taking pictures of my bruises before covering them with green concealer and foundation. I wore a hoodie for good measure.

I felt dizzy and decided it was probably best not to skate at the moment and I’m 90% sure I fell asleep on the subway. Apparently we had an art project due which I had no idea existed in the first place so I wasn’t going to that class today. Even though I did truly love Ms. Kramer. I was just gonna skip and go to Bri’s class. Which just happened to be chemistry.

I wasn’t surprised Mr. Cobwell asked no question when I walked in. I ate lunch in his class a couple times, he was chill. He continued on talking about Quantum Theory.

I made Flash move from his seat next to Bri which he immediately did. I guess he was scared of me now.

“Hey,” I said, placing my non bruised side of my face on the desk.

“Hey,” She whispered back. “What class are you supposed to be in?”

“Art,”

“Why are you there? You love art,”

“I’m not feeling it today,”

“Alright,” she nodded.

“Lemme use your AirPods,”

She reached into her bag handing them over going back to taking notes. That didn’t last long.

“What ya watching?” She asked.

“Bad Girls Club,” I smiled knowing she liked this show.

“What season?”

“7,” I whispered because now I felt too weak to waste my energy on speaking. I placed the phone on my lap and she took the other AirPod and before I knew I class was over with Tasha throwing trash everywhere.

I figured I was feeling sick because my blood sugar was low or something so I drank some Apple juice at lunch and called it a day.

Now time for Physics. I hate physics. Why would science ever require so much math?

It was so hot. Like on the face of the sun, hot but I couldn’t take my hoodie off because I felt like I’d sweat my foundation off.

“Are you okay?” Peter asked me “You look pale,” I swear if he doesn’t learn to mind his business.

“I’m fine,” I told him, not sure if I was trying to convince him or myself, I gestured to his notebook. “Do your work,”

“Alright fine,” he said reluctantly, glancing at me once before getting back to writing whatever we were supposed to be doing down.

I pulled my hoodie back over my head and sat up in my seat about to try to do my work again. But it was so hot and I was so dizzy that I couldn’t focus.

The world began to swirl and I knew the switch in my brain was going to flip off. I just didn’t have time or enough energy to tell anyone.

When I woke up I was in a bed in the nurse's office and the first thing I noticed was I didn’t have my hoodie. Shit. I used to make fun of people for passing out because how does your own body clock out on you? Until it started happening to me like last year.

I went into the bathroom and sure enough the giant bruise on my cheek and arm were kinda visible.

Again shit.

I patted my forehead with a cold paper towel because the nurse’s bathroom actually had paper towels unlike all the others, before the nurse came back.

“Hello, Are you feeling okay?”

I nodded. She smiled down at me before giving me water and checking my temperature.

“You have a fever,” she said after looking down at the thermometer “We called dad to come and pick you up but we got no answer. Is there anyone else that can come and take you?”

I shook my head, not trusting my voice.

I drank some more of the water before speaking up.

“I have a friend who’s at this school she could maybe drop me off?”

“I’m not sure if that’s allowed,” she said.

“You know what? Go back to class, get your friend and come right back.”

I pushed off the bed and headed out of the nurses office surprised to find Peter sitting on the bench outside it.

“Are you okay?” He asked me again

“Yes I’m okay” I nodded. Apparently I wasn’t as okay as I thought because I almost tripped over my leg trying to move. But Peter immediately reached his hand out to stabilize me. And I don’t know why that made me as angry as it was but I said “I don’t need you to help,” harsher than I need to.

“Sorry,” I said calmly almost immediately after.

“It’s okay,” He said scratching the back of his neck.

“If you don’t mind me asking where’d these bruises come from,”

“I fell,” was all I said. He looked skeptical but that was all he was going to get, I didn’t need CPS all up in my business. That’s also payback for him lying to me about “cat scratches”.

“Can you do me a favor?” I asked.

“Yeah, anything,” he said.

“Can you go get Briana from Mr. Dell’s class for me?”

“Yeah I’ll be right back,” he said before sprinting down the hallway. I giggled at his giddiness. It was still extremely hot everywhere my body was tingling.

Bri ran towards me

“Oh my god are you okay,”

“I’m fine, I just need you to talk to the nurse with me real quick,”

She apparently didn’t have her car with her today so she was a no go.

“I’m sorry girl,” she said, pulling me into a hug.

“It’s okay, go back to class now,” I said.

“Alright feel better,”

I walked back out of the office to find none other than Peter still waiting there.

“So what happened?” He asked.

“Looks like I’m walking home,” I smiled sarcastically. “Yay,”

“I can walk you home,”

“No, thank you”

“I insist,” I laughed again

“I still think that word is funny,” I said.

“Okay, now let me walk you home,”

We were walking in no general direction. No one but MJ and Bri know my address and I’d like to keep it that way.

“Wait, you need food,” He claimed.

We ended up at this place called Delmar’s Deli. I’d passed it a couple times while walking home and during my less legal “hobby”. I really wasn’t hungry at all. I took all of like two bites from my sandwich claiming I’d take it to go before throwing it away. It wasn’t bad, it was quite good, actually I just wasn’t hungry.

“My aunt is a nurse at an emergency room, she can check you out,” I hate anything that's anything like a hospital at all brings terrible memories, but I didn’t want him to know where I lived so I agreed. I’d ditch him then.

It took us a while to get there but by the time we did I had to stop and catch my breath. He offered to walk me home and got me food. What a Spiderman thing to do. I’d say I had much solid proof to go on by now.

“Peter!” The gorgeous brunette woman came over to the waiting room “What are you doing here don’t you have school?”

“Yeah but my friend-“ When her eyes ghosted over to my face she cut herself off. “Oh my God are you okay,” she referred to my bruises “What happened to you?”

“Did Flash do this to her?” She asked Peter and I had to stifle a laugh at that. I wish he would try to lay a finger on me.

“No, she just told me she fell, we’re here cause she fainted and I don’t know if the school nurse is very capable of actually helping,”

Is this a new thing Peter just decides to randomly worry about me for no good reason and forces me into taking care of myself. Because I hate it.

“Oh, ok,” She nodded her head. “Grab one of those questionnaires over there,” She pointed to the sign in table. “Are your parents going to come too?” She asked and I shook my head.

She and Peter moved over to the side and started talking about something I had no interest in. I grabbed the questionnaire and sat on the edge of the closest seat.

1. What’s your age?

That’s easy 15.

2. Specify your race

African American of course.

3. Select your highest level of education

Some high school

4. What’s your marital status?

Single never married. Unless you count that un-ordained wedding I once had.

5. Specify your employment status

A student.

6. Have you ever been treated in an emergency room (specify age)?

Yes, as a child.

7. Have you ever been rushed to the hospital? If yes, do you remember why?

Okay wow. Yes.

I sat on the cold bathroom floor, vision blurry from tears forming in my eyes.

“Y/N, you okay in there?” I heard my brother ask after lightly rapping his fingers on the door.

“Yeah, I’m okay!”

No I wasn’t. I wasn’t okay at all. In fact I was the farthest thing from okay. I glanced down at my thighs, you could see cuts from the night before and scars peeking out from underneath my shorts. I was sobbing at this point.

“I’m so sorry,” I whispered. I wasn’t sure if it was for myself or to everyone I knew I’d hurt by this. I already had the headache. I was just waiting for the rest of the pills to kick in.

I was holding onto the sink for support when the left side of my body started to feel tingly. The whole situation felt hazy. I was shaking hard before I fell, taking almost everything on the sink with me.

My head hit the bathmat and I could feel my heart slowing and hear my breath become shallow. I heard the doorknob jingle and that was the last thing before a feeling of true bliss and peace took over my body.

I could hear screams and sirens and I knew I was in an ambulance. Slowly I awoke with wires all over my body and an IV in my wrist. My limbs were dead weight, I couldn’t move.

A single tear fell from my eye alerting me off my surroundings. I quickly came back to myself. I made up the excuse of a family emergency and left.

I ended up halfway across the city. Then in Brooklyn visiting a friend.

I knocked on the window of Aaron’s apartment. I could see Miles sitting on the couch.

“How’ve things been over here?” I asked once I was settled on the couch as well.

“Uh, pretty tame, and you?”

“There was that whole elevator stunt and I almost fucking died which was fun.”

“Forgot you never take anything seriously,” He rolled his eyes.

I laughed in response “Well one of us has got to be fun for us since it’s clearly not you,”

“In celebration of me not dying I’m making sundaes,”

“Alright,” He said leaning back on the couch.

“Hey uh, When’s Aaron coming back?” I asked, getting the whipped cream out of the fridge.

“I’m not sure,”

This is actually like really fucking dangerous. Like it could kill me. It’s just I was already in pain and had a headache. I also wasn’t thinking. I’d already made the sundaes. I turned around so Miles couldn’t see what I was doing before I- Okay I’m not going to do this. Get it together God you’re acting like an addict. The amount of people who’ve died from inhalants were insane. There it is again death.

“Drawn anything new lately?” I asked, wanting to get my mind off of the topic of death that seemed to be plaguing my brain lately.

“Some small sketches,”

I got the text that’d I been waiting for. I’d been talking to Aaron for the past few days. I’m not sure how Miles would feel about that. So I haven’t said anything.

But I got the text.

Staten Island Ferry 3pm

I immediately popped up from the couch.

“I have to go like right now, it’s an emergency,”

I sprinted towards the door almost running into the punching bag in front of me.

“Y/N-“

It’d been a week and things were looking up. I had a great day yesterday without the use of any drug. But nothing good ever lasts too long. I didn’t have to worry about that now. What I needed to worry about, was getting Peter to stop falling on his ass.

I tried not to laugh at him and failed.

“It’s not funny,” he said, pulling me down with him as I reached out to pull him up. Soon he was laughing too.

I felt a vibration in my pocket and saw that Aaron texted me.

hey the results from the search came in.

what???? don’t play with me I’m on my way right now.

“Uh hey I gotta go sorry,”

“No it’s fine I probably should get home too,” He pushed off the ground reaching down for me.

“Do you wanna do this again tomorrow?” He asked a hopeful glint in his eye once we were both on our feet.

“Yeah sounds nice,” I smiled.

“Okay,” He nodded.

“Okay,” I echoed heading off.

Ned was being fucking stupid.

“NO!” I slammed my hands down on the table “You don’t stab anyone especially if you plan on using bleach to clean up the blood. At least use vinegar and lemon,”

“Okay, jeez,” he said reeling back, “How would you do it then?”

Before I could say anything MJ spoke up

“You could just use a needle full of air in between their toes, Their heart would fail”

“Orrr,” I said spinning around on top of the table towards Ned. “You could overdose them on potassium and by the time the police get there the potassium in their blood is back at a normal level,”

“Yeah that works too,” MJ stated going back to whatever she was drawing.

“You guys scare me,” Ned muttered making me smile.

“Where’s Peter?” I asked and Ned pointed across the room.

There he was sitting by Liz. It was cute I knew about his little crush on her. I’m sure the whole school did. Glad it’s working out for him. However that did not stop the pain in my stomach.

I got up from the table because suddenly I did not want to be at school anymore.

“Where are you going?” MJ looked up at me.

I shrugged. In all honesty I had no I idea where I was going. Somehow I always end up at Wade’s house when I don’t know where I want to go. He wasn’t home but I had a key. I can’t remember if he gave it to me or I stole if we're being honest.

Clearly I hadn’t passed by a mirror in a while because damn. I look terrible.

My eyes were red and circled with a dark hue from lack of sleep. I still had a yellowing bruise on my cheek. I was pale. I looked to be on the verge of death.

I looked frail, like at any second I’d just fall apart.

It was so unfair. My bones dragged down my body. The pieces of my soul that were mined out and removed from my mind. There’s a hole leaving me forever longing and I cannot fill nor feel. Hiraeth, a beautiful word for a ugly feeling. longing for a home that I never truly had, a home in which I’d never return. I would like to drift to where my spirit lies. It’s in the eyes of you and me and everyone in between. Drifting on a small boat in the sea. Viridian. Yes! That's the place I would like to be, that's where my soul lies yes you see.

I kept punching his punching bag over and over again. Until I was on my back on the floor begging my lungs to allow air into them with Time (Is) by Solange playing on loop. Something put it into my head that I had to kill Vulture. I’d never directly killed anyone but that was gonna change. Having people killed or knowing someone was going to kill someone and not doing anything about isn’t killing anyone in my book, but I’m sure it would be in Spidey’s

That’s literally Liz’s dad though…

Okay maybe I’d just get him locked up. Great now I gotta be a snitch. That’s new. I showered not even caring about my hair now my curls were sticking to my face. I was freezing now though. I didn’t know whether to be glad that my body wasn’t on fire anymore or be upset that I was covered in goosebumps.

Wade’s laptop was sitting right there on his bed. I was only taking a shower but, I think I should be allowed to watch Netflix and he wouldn’t mind, I was already on his account anways.

After like 3 episodes into this random show there was a folder that was calling to me for some reason.

It’d be okay to take a sneak peek. I thought to myself.

I clicked on it and it was locked. I guessed the password in like three tries. He’s really gotta up his password game. It opened to multiple folders, one with my mom's name. Okay I had to click this then.

I opened it which opened to more folders one titled ‘In Case of My Death’.

Okay, okay cool my mother has had a video of what to do all if she died all along. This would’ve come in handy five years ago.

There were three videos with the names of myself and my sisters. I clicked on mine then paused it.

Then unpaused it again.

I couldn’t do it. Okay, yes I could. I played it again. As soon as I heard the beginning of the word “hi”. I shut the computer off. I couldn’t do this. Couldn't do it because I was weak, I couldn’t handle myself. I was stupid and weak and a fucking disappointment. Guess my dad had been right all these years. I knew there was always some truth to the words he spoke only a matter of time until I started acknowledging it.

I don’t remember coming home to the apartment. And I definitely don’t remember writing all over the walls of my dad’s room. But I had a marker in my hands and it looked like a toddler had gone to town.

Holy Shit

He was actually going to murder me, in cold fucking blood. I trashed, the living room area, his room, and then mine. I was not coming home tonight. Looks like I’d need to find a new home now. At this point that sounded like a pretty solid plan.

I text my sisters a quick text ‘stay at grandma’s house tonight dad is going to pissed like Super Sayian mode’ before grabbing my go-bag which was: a bag of the essentials, like hygiene a couple shirts, shorts, hoodies, pants, and of course the flash drive can't forget the flash drive.

The flash drive that’s driving me crazy. I’d yet to open it though. I knew I was crazy because I did all this while fucking sobbing.

I wandered around for hours. Making my way to Brooklyn, Manhattan, Harlem, AND actual New York City.

Somehow I still ended up at Olivia’s door at the end of the day. I honestly believe we were soulmates. Most people don’t know you get many soulmates in a lifetime. I think Olivia and I would be the karmic kind. A karmic relationship is meant to help you grow, but it is never meant to last—it's often playing out a bad experience from a past life. I’m guessing I hadn’t grown yet because here I was.

She opened the door after a second. I’m surprised she did because I used our special knock so I knew she knew it was me.

“I can’t fucking do this anymore,” I screamed in her face.

“You're the one going off and being secretive and shit, like you’re scared I’m gonna hurt you or something,” she yelled walking up the stairs.

I followed after her,

“Maybe you would hurt me. I don’t know you are insane,” I said, tears brimming my eyes.

“Just because you have fucking daddy issues, doesn’t mean you have to carrying them into every part of your life,”

“I have daddy issues?” I screamed soon turning into me choking on a laugh making an unhinged noise “Oh, I have fucking daddy issues, now? Oh, okay,” I nodded.

“Your parents didn’t even fucking want you,” I pointed at her. “At least my mom stuck around before she died,”

“You’re an asshole, you know that?”

“Yeah well right back at you,”

“You’re fucking psychotic! Literally you’re so much like your dad and you don’t even know it, You’re trying to please him and he doesn’t give two shits about you, Wake up Y/N! Wake up.”

“I’m hard on you because I love you so much,” She claimed, but her love was suffocating.

“Oh yeah? I asked “Well i don’t know how much more of this ’love’ I can take,”

“Fine then,” She screamed.

“Fine,” I said before she slammed the door in my face leaving me standing out in the cold crying.

That wasn’t even the worse we’d said to each other. It was the first but not the last time we’d break up either. I do believe we loved each other though in our own twisted way. Well at least I know I loved her.

“Hey,” She said softly as she could sense I was due to break at any second. My cheeks were probably tear stained.

“Hey,” I whispered back.

“Are you okay?” She asked.

“No,” I shook my head. One thing I liked about her is I didn’t have to fake it around her, because masking my real emotions was so draining. At least I didn’t have to do it with everyone.

“Wanna talk about it?”

“No,”

“Okay,” she said softly “My parents aren’t home, so you don’t have to worry about them,” not surprised.

I nodded before she grabbed my hand bringing me inside.

“I missed you,” she said stroking my hair as I laid on her bed, my head in her lap.

“I missed you too,” I wasn’t lying my head drifted to her from time to time. It wasn’t that I wanted to get back together I just missed her presence.

She smiled sadly at me running her finger over the bags on my eyes.

“Heavy is the head that wears the crown,” She quotes.

“Yeah well, ’m not queen or princess and definitely don’t have a crown, so we don’t gotta worry ‘bout me,” I said.

“You’re a princess to me,” I gave a genuine yet tired smile at that.

“You can go to sleep, it’s okay,” She said.

That was the first time I was actually able to fall asleep and without medicine or having to go on a walk or do anything really.

I woke up in the bed alone only to find Olivia sitting at her kitchen island eating spaghetti.

She smiled when she saw me coming into view.

“Sleep well?” She asked.

“Yeah surprisingly,” How long had I been asleep for I wondered.

“It’s 10 pm,” She said, still being able to read me.

I made my way over to her and sat across her.

“So what’s really going on with you miss Y/N?” She questioned.

I shrugged “I don’t know, nothing,”

“Are you trying to convince me or yourself? Cause I’m not buying,”

I explained to her how my dad was being weird and how I wanted to move out now. How I had pretty much vandalized the house. How I found the video of my mom. Just everything. Well maybe not everything I didn’t tell her about Vulture because I feel like she’d try to do something and I didn’t want her to get hurt.

“Oh wow, damn... holy shit. Are you gonna watch your moms video?” She asked. Huh I hadn’t thought about that.

“I mean of course I will, yeah,” I nodded “Probably, I don’t know I’m scared,”

“Wouldn’t you rather just push the fear back and watch then wonder the rest of your life what it says.”

I sighed. Can't argue with that logic.

“I’m assuming you came here because you need a place to stay?” She said.

“Yes, I need a place to stay just for a while but I don’t want it to seem like I’m just using you I can find somewhere else,”

“Now it’s fine stay as long as you need but my dad gets back at the end of the month and we both know he doesn’t like you,” She chuckled at the last sentence and I laughed too.

I was on the ferry heading towards Staten Island now. I knew the sale was for these weird alien shits but that's pretty much all I knew. I figured I’d sort of “out bid” the buyers then get rid of everything. By outbid I mean straight up steal. Some guy in a white pickup truck is officially my target. Thorn was still on hiatus. Meaning no knives unless you count the pocket knife I always had on me, no suit. I did have a trejo though, you know just in case. I couldn’t help my mind from drifting to Pop Smoke’s “I got it on me”. I let out a small laugh.

I was hiding behind some car waiting for a crack in the plan to slip in.

That was until Spiderman showed up. It’s like he had a sixth sense to ruin all of my plans.

Shit

Well abort mission. Just as I started walking around to get to the side of the boat. The van I was next to had Vulture literally coming out of it. I knew it’d looked familiar.

I made it up to the top deck looking down on everything unfolding. So a quick rundown, the FBI was here, meaning Tony Stark or someone with government clearance probably did something because I highly doubt that Spiderman, the Spiderman that I’ve seen hit a window like a bird while swinging, had any government clearance.

See now I was looking to find a good time to make my escape. That was until that purple alien shit started spewing stuff beams of light through the ship. And fuck, I look away for one second and the new Shocker guy was gone. I turned around and saw he was running in another direction. I chased after him the rubber of my sneakers squeaking on the deck.

I jumped down onto Shocker’s back sending us both to the floor before he pushed me off. I was definitely going to be sore tomorrow and I’m pretty sure I heard something pull in my leg.

He jumped off onto the Vulture and I knew I couldn’t do anything anymore. Not like I was just going to shoot them down in public. I saw the light shooting down the middle of the ferry. I was gonna make a run for it but the loud squeal noise was so loud I fell over. Soon I was slung back into what I think was a bench not entirely sure I just knew it hurt like a bitch.

I’m pretty sure I feel unconscious for like 30 seconds.

But that was enough because the boat had already split in half and I couldn’t get to the deck or a lifeboat. However Spider-Man was frantically trying to get it together.

I was trying to be hopeful because everything was looking up, as the parts of the ship got closer together but I think we all know the saying ‘what goes up must come down’

Over the ringing in my head I could assume that things were fixed because people were cheering. One thing that comes from cheering is movement and if I learned anything from the elevator it’s that moving in a very unstable metal death box is not a good idea.

The ship was falling apart again until it wasn’t. It was pushed back together by I could only assume would be our government clearance guy Tony Stark. I looked out the window and yep there he was.

As soon as I got on solid ground I called my sisters.

“Hiii!” I exclaimed. “Where are you, are you okay?”

“Yes we’re fine, and where at grandma’s house like you told us to go to where else would we be,” I could almost hear the eye roll in Liyah’s voice.

“Okay little Miss attitude stay there until I can feel everything out with dad,”

“Alright,”

“Okay I love you guys,” I said, getting a small “love you too” from Sapphire.

“I know,” was the response I got from Liyah. I almost gasped the audacity of this child.

“Say it back,”

“Say it back,” She mocked, evoking laughter from both sides of the call.

“Okay love you too byeeee,” She said hanging up.

I smiled, I know as much as we get into petty arguments or try to annoy each other on purpose but I’d go to hell and back for those girls. And that’s exactly what I was going to do.

Taglist:

@tomdiddlyumptious

#peter parker #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker x reader #reader x peter parker #Peter Parker x Vigilante!Reader #peter parker x fem!reader #peter parker x y/n #peter parker x black!reader #peter parker x villian!reader #poc reader x peter parker #peter parker x bisexual!reader #peter parker x bi!reader #peter parker x thorn #thorns prick #spiderman x villian #mcu series #mcu x reader #peter parker x you #spiderman x thorn

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mexicancat-girl · 4 years

Text

Quiet (with you)

Another MarcNath fic written for #MLPrideFest2020 and Pride month in general

AO3: Link, 3600 words

...

Even after making friends, Marc still likes to write under the stairs.

Maybe it was just an ingrained habit at this point.

Marc didn’t do well with crowds, or loud places. It was all too chaotic. Ironic, considering he loved loud music; but dealing with people in real life was different than listening to his favorite albums.

Either way, Marc started his habit of siting and writing under the stairs since the start of the school year, too anxious to deal with both the cafeteria and his crippling loneliness of not having any friends to sit with. He has friends to sit with now, but his anxiety was a fickle thing. Sometimes he just didn’t want to seem like a bother.

The stairs were a place he enjoyed, though. They were quiet. Out of the way. And no one looked under the stairs, so it provided a nice little hidey hole. He could be isolated, while not being wholly alone.

After all, if he stayed under the stairs in the courtyard, he could hear and see when lunch let out and he had to go back to class. He couldn’t do that if he wrote in, say, the Library. The Library was too quiet, too out of the way. Marc would forget altogether about needing to leave, entranced in his writing, making him accidentally skip classes like some sort of delinquent.

And he wasn’t a delinquent! He just got lost in his head when he wrote…

Marc fiddles with his pen. Someone takes that moment to step close to him on his left.

“Hey,” a familiar voice says in a yawn. Marc snaps up his attention to Nathaniel, who hovers over him for a few seconds, before unceremoniously dropping to the ground to sit next to him.

Or, well. It looks more like he collapsed to the ground.

“Are you okay?!” Marc yelps, nearly chucking his pen and notebook aside in his haste.

Nathaniel just blinks back at him blearily, posture horribly slouched. He has dark circles under his uncovered eye, as if stamped on the pale skin there. His vibrant red hair is mussed, like he’d just been sleeping.

“M’fine,” the redhead sighs out, giving another jaw-cracking yawn right after. “Just tired.”

Marc frowns over at the other boy in concern. “Nathaniel…”

“Mmm?” he hums listlessly in reply.

“Did…did you get any sleep at all, last night?” Marc hedges, staring at the exhausted-looking artist.

“…Maybe.”

“How many hours?” he presses carefully, concern welling up even stronger as he watches Nathaniel duck his head and slump down even further.

“…A few.”

“How many exactly?”

“Like…Four?” is the weak response.

“Nathaniel!” Marc gasps, scandalized and concerned.

Nathaniel just groans, burying his face in his hand. “M’fiiiine.”

“You’re sleep deprived! That’s not fine!” he retorts, setting aside his notebook and pen to turn in place and put his full attention to his friend-slash-crush.

“Well, I’m still alive. So I think—” a yawn disrupts Nathaniel’s drawl “—I’m good.”

“You have to sleep,” Marc decides, quite logically. “You’ll pass out any second if you don’t. And you’ll end up missing class.”

“Bold of you to assume I didn’t already,” the redhead laughs dryly.

“You what?!”

Nathaniel just shrugs, looking vaguely sheepish as he says, “I fell asleep in class again. No big deal.”

“Is this a common occurrence?” Marc asks, brows flying up in shock. “Does this happen all the time?”

“Well, not all the time…” Nathaniel hedges, pink dusting his cheeks and uncovered eye darting away. “Just…Every once in a while.”

Marc sighs, shaking his head. His crush doesn’t seem like he’s jumping to elaborate, and Marc knows how stubborn the boy could be.

One more thing the two have in common to add to the pile: they both had a shit time asking others for help.

“Why did you only get four hours of sleep anyways?” Marc can’t help but ask, curious.

“…I forgot to?” the redhead cringes.

“You forgot to sleep?!” Marc yelps, leaning forwards to gawk in horror. All he gets in reply is a sheepish, tired laugh. “Nathaniel! How can you just forget?”

“Marc, when you have ADHD, it’s easy to forget a lot of things,” Nathaniel deadpans, looking a bit more dead inside as he does so.

“That’s not an excuse, and you know it.” Marc chides, giving a pointed look. “You have a phone. Set an alarm to remind yourself to go to bed.”

“…I do that. It doesn’t work.”

“Set multiple alarms, then?”

“If I do that, I just get pissed that my phone keeps interrupting me. And then I keep drawing anyways.”

Marc sighs, tapping a finger against his cheek. “There has to be a solution…”

“Prob’ly,” Nathaniel shrugs, another jaw-cracking yawn spilling from his mouth. “Look, I just… really wanna take a nap right now.”

“Go ahead. I’ll wake you up when we need to go back to class,” Marc tells him automatically, freezing slightly when he realizes what he’d just offered.

Oh God, was that weird? Who the hell would want to take a nap under the stairs? Not only is it creepy, it’s all solid concrete down here, hardly a comfortable place to sleep for any amount of time—

Nathaniel, however, doesn’t seem bothered by the offer. In fact, he smiles back at Marc, bright and genuine even through his apparent exhaustion.

“Really?” the redhead asks, as Marc awkwardly sputters and nods. “Thanks, Marc, you’re the best…!”

With a concerning amount of cheeriness and enthusiasm, Nathaniel flops right onto his back and throws an arm over his eyes, apparently settling in for a nap then and there.

“Y-Y-You’re welcome…?” Marc tells him weakly.

The redhead hums, but doesn’t do anything else in reply. He just shifts to his side, facing Marc, and…completely zones out.

Marc watches in fascination as the other boy instantly falls asleep. Just like that.

For someone that apparently had trouble going to bed, Nathaniel didn’t waste time actually falling asleep, it seems.

Marc slowly and carefully picks his notebook and pen back up, making sure he’s quiet and doesn’t startle the other boy awake.

And then he writes.

-----

Every once in a while, Marc looks up to check up on Nathaniel.

The redhead keeps on sleeping, dead to the world.

It’s probably creepy to do, but after more and more time passes, Marc’s gaze is drawn to watching Nathaniel’s sleeping form. Like a magnet. And eventually, he just sort of. Watches him sleep.

After all, there’s not exactly many opportunities for him to stare unabashedly at his crush without possibly getting caught by said crush. There’s also the factor in play that sleeping is a private and intimate thing, and Nathaniel had no problems just…hunkering down and taking a nap by Marc’s side.

Either Nathaniel really trusts him and isn’t bothered by the possibility of Marc judging him, or he’s so exhausted he genuinely doesn’t give a fuck about anyone’s opinion.

Both options make Marc’s stupid gay heart flutter, just a bit, in his chest.

Nathaniel looks so… peaceful while he sleeps. His face is slack, lips parted slightly as he breathes slowly and deeply. The exhaustion and stress melts from his features. His lashes are delicate as they fan out across his cheekbones, kissing the small smattering of freckles there. His bangs are mussed and out of his face completely for once, hair feathered out, fire spilling against the concrete.

The other boy doesn’t snore, either. But he does drool, just a bit.

The sight makes Marc smile. It’s probably achingly lovestruck and fond. He doesn’t fight it.

Marc shifts—slowly, carefully—until he’s sitting level with the sleeping redhead. He pauses, heart in his throat, when Nathaniel mumbles and shifts a bit. And then tenses when the boy butts his head against Marc’s thigh.

Marc watches with bated breath as Nathaniel snuggles against his leg like a cat, apparently drawn to Marc’s body heat. He even curls up a bit and throws his leg over Marc’s extended one, knee hiked up, the weight trapping Marc’s right leg in place.

Marc’s face feels like it’s on fire. He tries very, very hard not to squeal. And also tries to ignore the fact that if Nathaniel migrates further, he’ll end up in Marc’s lap.

Though Marc honestly can’t complain about that, even if the prospect makes him want to go into cardiac arrest from mingled embarrassment and joy.

Fumblingly, Marc brings up his unoccupied leg, balancing his notebook precariously onto his raised knee. He doesn’t even know what he writes—if its cohesive at all, or just the ramblings of a madman desperately in love—but he has to at least occupy himself. If he doesn’t, he’ll die on the spot, or his mind will overthink everything.

If he doodles a few too many hearts on the page than is considered normal, well. No one’s around to see him.

-----

“Damn it, Nath…! Where are you?!” Alix seethes under her breath, stomping across the cafeteria.

She was a woman on a mission.

Somehow, in the five seconds Alix took her eyes off Nathiel in Miss Bustier’s class, he managed to slip past her. He was a slippery one, and too quiet for his own good.

Alix was pissed. Mostly concerned for Nath’s health and continued wellbeing, but pissed all the same.

That dumb tomato-boy was probably off somewhere, passed out in a corner of the school like a homeless person. Vulnerable and ready for any old bully to waltz by him. All because he was avoiding Alix, since she tended to strongarm him to stay awake and eat a proper lunch and wallow in his mistakes of staying up til nearly four in the fucking morning. Again.

Either way, Alix was going to find his stupid ass, and drag him to eat lunch so he could have enough energy to not pass right the fuck out and end up in the nurse’s office.

She’s checked his favorite hidey-holes in the Art Club Room and the Library. With those options eliminated, she has no reason to really stay on the top floors. So she ends up stomping all the way back down to the main floor.

And then realizes that she may have forgotten one last spot.

Quietly, she moves away from the stairs. And when she’s got enough distance, carefully hiding behind a column, she crouches and looks under the stairs.

Marc is there, as she expected. His bright-red hoodie and messy hair are fairly recognizable.

Passed out next to Marc is a very familiar form that Alix instantly recognizes as her dumbass best friend, one Nathaniel Kurtzberg.

Alix would normally stomp on over and wake Nath up. But the actual sight before her makes her pause, and consider.

Marc is sitting down, one knee propped up and seemingly trying to write in his notebook, and looking to be struggling at it. Probably because Nathaniel is half-using him as a pillow, his head all but in Marc’s lap, a leg thrown over Marc’s extended one.

Marc’s sort of trapped under Nathaniel. Though he looks so enraptured and awed at the fact that he’s being used as a pillow, he probably wouldn’t move from his spot in a thousand years.

It’s…an incredibly cute sight.

And it’s also a bit surprising, too.

Not the fact that Marc’s looking down at Nathaniel with a look so gooey and lovestruck, he pretty much has hearts for eyes. Alix’s picked up near-instantly that Marc has a bit of a hopeless crush on her best friend.

No, the more surprising part is Nathaniel taking a nap on Marc.

Nathaniel never feels bothered about taking naps at school, just plonking his head on his desk and diving straight into dreamland. But sleeping around other people is a bit different.

Nath likes to cuddle when he sleeps. But he only does it to people he really, truly trusts. He won’t just sleep on any person.

So far, the phenomena only extends to family. Which includes Alix and Jalil, because Nath all but considers them his siblings. But he doesn’t sleep on any of his other friends.

The fact that he’s sleeping on Marc shows that he trusts him. A lot, at that.

It shows that he even considers Marc family.

“Interesting…” Alix mutters quietly under her breath, her mouth breaking into a shit-eating grin.

Feeling devious, she carefully fishes her phone from her pocket, and clicks it on. A few swipes later, and she’s zooming in on her camera to take a dozen photos of Marc and Nathaniel in their current position.

She’s so going to tease the shit out of Nath later over this.

Hell, she might as well start a new album for them, at the rate that this is going. She hadn’t even realized Nath was crushing back on Marc.

Hell, Nath might not even know he has a crush on Marc.

This is ironically hilarious.

And hey! They’ll all make great photos for the wedding, she’s sure. She should know; she’s going to be Nath’s best man. They pretty much made a blood pact on it when they were younger. She’d be his best man, and he’d be hers, if they ever got married.

With a smirk and a cheery hum under her breath, Alix carefully and quietly backs away, so she won’t be seen and ruin their cute little moment.

She could let it slide. She’ll let Nath sleep, this time.

-----

It feels both like an eternity, and no time at all, before the sounds of students migrating out of the lunchroom get louder and louder.

With a pang of regret and longing, Marc realizes he has to wake Nathaniel back up.

Well. It’d been good while it lasted.

At the very least, Marc can make some corrections about his daydreams of a blissful domestic life with his crush. Including the newly revealed fact that Nathaniel’s a cuddler.

“Nathaniel…Wake up,” Marc says, ducking down and gently shaking his shoulder. “We have to get back to class.”

“Five more minutes,” the redhead half-groans half-whines, raising his head slightly just to plop it straight on Marc’s thigh, burying his face there.

Marc all but jumps out of his skin. He’s so startled, he yanks his leg away, watching in horrified mortification as Nathaniel smacks his face slightly on the concrete.

“I’m up, I’m up!” the redhead yelps, jolting up, blue eyes wide and staring around himself wildly as he shifts himself into a sitting position.

“I-I-I’m so sorry,” Marc gasps, instantly hovering over his friend. “OhmyGodNath—”

“S’fine! S’fine,” Nathaniel says, shaking his head wildly, before bringing a hand up to carefully rub at his face. “My fault for smacking myself anyways.”

“A-Are y-you okay?” Marc worries, hands fluttering to and fro.

“I think so…?” the redhead blinks, cheeks dusted pink. “Ummm…Sorry, c-can you see if I have a bruise, or—”

“Y-Yes, of course.” Marc quickly leans his face in, scrutinizing the other for injuries. Other than the growing blush (no doubt of embarrassment) on Nathaniel’s face, there’s no major change in color that’s a warning sign for an injury. “N-No, you’re fine. Your nose looks a little red, but that’s it.”

“Thanks, man,” Nathaniel sighs, leaning back and rubbing at his nose, eyes averted. “I mean, I’ve had worse on my face after waking up, but still. It’s nice to have someone to check.”

“I’ve fallen asleep on my notebooks before…” Marc offers, wincing sympathetically. This earns him a small smile in return, which is worth the slight embarrassment of his admission.

“Oh, same. I’ve conked out right on my notebooks and sketchbooks before. Woken up with writing from my notes or smeared marker on my face,” the other says, laughing awkwardly, obviously self-conscious even if he jokes about it.

“I-If you need to, you probably have enough time to double-check in the bathroom…But I think your face looks great,” Marc starts, before his too-authentic words catch up to him. “Um! I-I mean, fine. Your face. Is fine. You’re fine.” Marc nearly closes his eyes and drops into a prayer for God to smite him where he sits. “S’fine.”

“Uhhh…Right,” Nathaniel coughs, smiling, blue eye glimmering with mirth. “Anyways. Sorry for making things, like…awkward? But I appreciate you letting me nap with you. Really. I felt like dying.”

“N-No problem! It’s no problem at all!” Marc is quick to wave his hands in front of himself to wave away the other’s concern. “I’m glad I could help.”

“Yeah, Alix doesn’t let me get away with sleeping during lunch anymore,” Nathaniel sighs, smile turning crooked and abashed. “She says I’m scrawny enough that I can’t afford to be skipping meals.”

“I don’t think you’re scrawny,” Marc answers automatically and loyally. Apparently, his brain-to-mouth filter has gone and died on him in the past hour. He would blame Nathaniel for being so cute, but honestly, this is more of a him problem than anything. He’s too big of a gay disaster for his own good.

Nathaniel just smiles and laughs. Not in a mocking way, but in a way like he’s thought Marc made a funny joke.

“Alix would say otherwise, but thanks,” he says warmly, tugging his bangs behind his ear. Marc is hit with both of Nathaniel’s blue eyes crinkled in fondness. It all but punches the breath straight out of him. “Did I bother you at all, by the way?”

“N-Not at all!” Marc is quick to assure, even as he averts his gaze in a way that’s no doubt guilty. “I-I still got a b-bit of writing done…”

“Good. I didn’t want to mess up your flow or anything…Y’know, since this is your spot to write and all,” the redhead says, self-deprecating, averting his gaze. “And…Thanks again for letting me chill here. It’s actually really peaceful.”

“W-well, this isn’t my spot, per se…I-It’s not like I own it?” Marc starts, a bit mystified, but backpedals a bit so he doesn’t seem rude. “B-But you’re welcome! You can come by anytime. It’s not like I’d ever turn you away.”

Wait. Why did he say that?

Marc freezes, trying not to panic. Did he just admit he’d never turn Nathaniel away? What if that blows his cover? What if Nathaniel realizes he means it genuinely, but like, in a very non-platonic and incredibly gay way?

“Ooh, permission to sit here in your secret spot…? I’m honored,” Nathaniel grins back at him toothily, before finally moving to stand. “I’ll come by more often if you come sit with me at lunch more. Deal?”

Nathaniel holds his hand out to Marc, smiling expectantly back at him. Face warm and heart aflutter, Marc reaches out. Nathaniel clasps his hand and heaves him up off the ground, nearly over-balancing in the process.

“Woah! You’re heavier than you look,” the redhead laughs, obviously teasing as he makes a show of wiping his forehead.

Marc huffs, bending down to snag his pen and notebook. “Or maybe I have a solid three inches on you, so I have more body mass.”

“Well gee, thanks for reminding me that I’m short,” Nathaniel drawls back.

The two eye each other with mock annoyance, before they burst into laughter.

Marc feels a potent mix of fondness and joy settle in his chest, nestled with the swarm of butterflies there.

It’s always…freeing…to laugh with Nathaniel. It reminds Marc that they really are friends. That Nathaniel doesn’t just tolerate him. That he maybe even enjoys Marc’s company.

“Get back to class, sleepyhead,” Marc teases, using his unoccupied hand to wave as he starts to step back.

“You get back to class!” Nathaniel retorts, grinning wide, raising a hand in goodbye.

Marc’s already a few meters away, when a thought strikes and a surge of confidence fills him. He has one more thing to say.

He turns around and walks backwards to look at Nathaniel, who’s still standing in the same place as before, yawning and rubbing at his eye. Marc makes an exaggerated and over-the-top pantomime of smoothing his hair down, as he calls, “You should probably fix your hair, while you’re at it!”

Nathaniel startles, staring back at him. Marc can’t help but smirk back, amusement growing as the other boy blushes and instantly starts to comb his fingers through his hair, flattening it back in place and re-arranging it so he doesn’t look like he’d just tripped out of bed.

Even with his efforts, his red hair looks tousled, full of flyaway strands that just won’t sit still.

And coupled with his blushing face, well. Nathaniel looks like he’s done more than just take a cat nap.

Marc turns right around and speed-walks away before Nathaniel can say anything else, or his own mind can fall deeper into the gutter.

-----

As Marc makes his way to class, he clutches his notebook to his chest and bites his lip, but the smile spreads wide and crooked in his mouth anyways.

He just…He just made Nathaniel blush.

He giggles a bit under his breath, pressing his knuckles against his lips, no doubt smearing his lip gloss. But he can’t even bring himself to care. He’s too giddy. The butterflies buzz and flutter in his chest, alongside his heart.

He can’t wait for Nathaniel to join him under the stairs again.

Marc may like the quiet and solitude, but…He thinks he likes being quiet with Nathaniel even more.

#MLPrideFest2020 #Nathaniel Kurtzberg #Marc Anciel #Alix Kubdel #MarcNath #NathMarc #Miraculous Ladybug #fanfic #pride month #mexicat writes

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kennypurrson · 4 years

Note

1, 5, 12, 16, 23, 29, 36, 46, 49, 50 for my fellow Thembo pls 🥺👉👈

Ace: An ask for me? *Squits at the user name confused for a moment before going red* FROM FAE O/////////////O H-Hi

Dakota: *Waggles eyebrows at Ace to them an even darker shade of red.*

1: A lesser demon started it and it spread like wildfire "He's only at the House of Lamination cause he's screwing one of the brothers"

When really he's there because Dakota snuck them in and they all just accepted Ace is there with them. Dakota has gotten scolded multiple times by Lucifer trying to protect Ace's reputation and shut everyone up or if they give Ace looks or use the wrong pronouns.

5: My Superhero Movie

"I'll shake my bootie! in my own movie!

It's my movie!

My movie

My superhero movie"

Exactly those lines. The song blares through the house because Dakota. Then Dakota showed it to Ace and Ace loved it. Also the "It goes bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, BOOM!" Fits them well because Ace is no think only thing sound effect.

12: Cooking without making a giant mess! Ace isn't the best at staying clean. Do Not give them flour. A sign on the kitchen wall made by Lucifer hangs up listening things to not let Ace do alone and flour is #1 from the great incident of making bread from scratch.

Ace, Lucifer, and the entire kitchen were white that night. Dakota was laughing his ass off as he watched, along with Mammon and the two were forced into cleaning duty.

16: They'd all be like

Ace would probably accidentally end up going somewhere he shouldn't or listening to someone and getting arrested. Their guesses would be funny things:

Dakota: murder!!

Mam: stealing! I thought them so well *mom tears*

Asmo: ;)))))))))

Satan: *not having time for this* this is stupid they're innocent

Lucifer: *going to get Ace*

23: Sir Bearington! Ace's stuffed bear that they made. Its a comfort bear and isn't of much value, yet Mammon thinks so and tries to steal it, which now is just a game since Ace asked Satan to help and Satan cursed Mammon for a day to be a stuffed animal, which Ace carried around the house all day.

29: Punches. When Ace is truly truly angry which is very rare. Ace will get into fights. They're demon form helps with their tail having spikes they can use for extra damage. Yet when Ace is just upset they will pout and be huffy for a bit. Normally Ace is very easy to calm down unless they are very upset.

36: Ace does. Also HIGHKEY loves soulmate things. #1 fan. Loves zodiacs as well and things like that.

46: Everything? Ace is very very guliable and this gets used against them in pranks and things like that. They're countless times where Ace believes something false and someone like Lucifer has to tell him the truth.

49: Hot weather! Being used to the devildom Ace thives in hot temperatures. Once brought to the human relam during a rainstorm and loved it. Is sad that it doesn't rain like that in the devildom.

50: Hmm. Probably their creations. The creative demon loves showing off their drawings. Will just sit you down and have a presentation of his drawings and will talk about each one.

More about Ace and their work:

They pin them to the fridge. Dakota told them that's what humans do with art when Dakota did it the first time. Now the fridge is filled with pictures.

Likes drawing Lucifer smiling and will leave him all over his desk and between paper work to remind him to smile. Lucifer has taken a family picture and hid it in his desk.

Convinced Mammon to commission them to draw him and goldie

Draws ruri-chan and levi

Draws scenes from books for satan if he sees what book the blonde demon is reading. Sometimes will draw Satan and Lucifer hugging to try and mend their bond.

Asmo gets some uh more tasteful drawings along with clothing designs

Beel gets pictures of him and his brothers happy together, mostly belphie, Ace has asked about Lilith to draw her for Beel.

Belphie gets protaits of him sleeping. Ace thought it would be funny and now when he sees him sleeping will draw the demon. Also cows. Ace loves the creatures and will draw and share his love with Belphie.

Dakota gets memes.

#liv asks #Ace #Dakota #fae ily #ace loves you

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altissiavibritannia · 3 years

Text

I feel dead inside....

Why is everybody being so mean to me for?! What’d I do...in order for you to tell me to stop liking my favorite things...? Why should I not finish Hetalia for? Besides...Hetalia and Code Geass has helped me out so many times over whenever I was depressed...I have very bad depression to the point it’s not even funny...not this again...I used to be a huge Yu-Gi-Oh GX, Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D’S, Arc-V and such fan with Yu-Gi-Oh!...until so many people hated my art and stories about it...I still duel and such...but...I dropped out of the fandom and stopped reading my GX manga set (never even finished reading it, left off on vol. 5 or 6...) and stopped writing fics and stopped doing fanart of it completely...Am I not good enough for anyone...? It’s like first my art and story ideas for Yu-Gi-Oh! and now this...it’s like I’m not even allowed to be happy...Yu-Gi-Oh! GX and 5D’s has saved my life, alongside Fruits Basket, Naruto (before this Baruto garbage and the Shippuden stuff happened), and Inuyasha whenever I was age 12....maybe younger than that...but mostly was a Beyblade, Dinosaur King, Tai Chi Chasers, and Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D’s person back then...cuz it was on Toonzi or 4Kids before they stopped playing them, cuz 4Kids had been cancelled and my favorite animes had vanished, due to me being poor to offord cable and me and my mother had moved a lot...so I’ve only known bits and pieces of those animes whenever Saturday mornings came by...and I watched Yu-Gi-Oh! GX on YouTube whenever I was waiting for Yusei and the signers of 5D’s to come back on whenever I was able to watch it.

I even saw bits and pieces of Fairly Odd Parents, Jonny Cash, Storm Hawks, and American Dragon: Jake Long (before that got cancelled) whenever me and mom had to babysit her friend’s kids and I watched cable with them a few times, whenever I wasn’t in a artistic mood or writing mood...and the only times when it was time for the Adult Swim to show up, she allowed me to watch some Family Guy, Naruto (saw the very first episode when it came on), and Inuyasha...but then mom changed the channel whenever that ever came on and told me to stop watching it...yet I’ve watched only Naruto and Inuyasha behind her back on YouTube whenever I felt too depressed...and I still love these animes but forgot the plot to them, due to not watching them and such...

And now it’s like I’m not to even be alive anymore...due to people not wanting to be my friend...due to all of my health issues and for my ideas...all they want to do with me is make me into their puppet for their own attention...if I have to go back to that...then I’d rather die...had this go on for most of my life and I’m sick of it...and if I’m not allowed to like Hetalia, Code Geass or anything else that I love to death...then I guess I’m not meant to be here or be an artist or author anymore then...even though writing stories/fics is what I do, same with drawing...I’ve been a fucking nerd ever since growing up!

I’ve started doing art by doing finger paints and such in preschool. That was my spark in life, I’ve loved doing art throughout my life, cuz it helps me get rid of my depression and what other feelings I had bottled up. My imagination is what driven me this far in life. Then years later as I was growing up, I loved to read book, even though I hate reading out loud, due to my speech problems and not being able to understand or say hard words. But it drove me to the next level of my creativity, I wanted to become an author someday. As I grew up some more...I quit public schooling, due to being bullied too much and nobody giving a goddamn shit about me...then I felt smart for a bit until I found out that I was really tired...and I didn’t do my homework for the rest of my 7th grade semester. I basically skipped a whole grade, almost 2. I only made it to the last bit of my 8th grade in public schooling, cuz mom got sick and tired of me sleeping too much and not doing my homework. She felt concerned that I needed to try to make friends again.

Sadly whenever I graduated (never showed up, I hate crowds, due to being scared of being made fun off like now...) 8th grade in my middle school that I didn’t stay in after yet another move, they gave me my diploma for 8th grade...and whenever I became a freshman...the bullying got worse and worse...I’ve been blamed for being the bully for once I wasn’t and sure enough I might have a Bakugou kind of temper and I did say “I’ll kill you!” back then towards my bullies, but I didn’t know better. I was talking about a tickle fight, cuz I figured that tickle fights were less violent than blowing up in others faces and the teachers thought I meant by tooth and nail and then gave me detentions. I even got blame for their wrong doings, even though they have cameras and such. But yeah a few times I had no other choice but to go for tooth and nail, cuz some random ass bitch who I didn’t even know, just grabbed me by the shirt and threw my ass on the ground. I got up crying like a fucking Deku, picking up my books and homework off the ground and guess what the funny shit is?! There was a goddamn teacher there, even though this shit was in the morning when we were getting ready to head inside the building. So, I basically fucking bit her dumb fucking ass, when she punched me for no reason! I let one the Bakugou within me, out! I didn’t swear though, but I fucking fought to the death, I was ready for anything and I mean it! I wanted to kill her so fucking badly, for being such an ugly bitch. Soon the teacher saw this and, gave me a detention for self defense. Until I told her what happened, she then gave that bitch one too, but then that bitch put on an act to blame me for no reason. She got off too fucking easy for no fucking reason!

But you know what the fuck what?! If you fucking hate my fucking Deku guts, then beat it! I will not be defeated yet again! I’m sick and tired of being fucking bullied about who I really am bitches! Shocked on how I got over my depression so fucking fast to the point that I’m super pissed? Well it’s because I swapped personalities! So don’t mess with me, unless you’d like to meet all of my personalities! Sure enough I talk to myself, but it’s due to me not having anybody to fucking talk to!!! I’m always by myself to the point, I become a furry throughout my years and then later on a brony once the first 2 episodes that My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic comes up! I tend to watch anime and MLPFIM for multiple reasons! So you can either love me or hate me, I don’t give a damn fuck anymore! If your ass wants to block me due to my weird ideas and shit, then go right ahead, you’re just going to be bit in the goddamn ass 100 times fold by karma bitch! What comes the fuck around, goes around! Because if you block me, then you’re really missing out on a really good, loving, kindhearted, funny, etc. person! Not to mention, I’m going to be tested for D.I.D. and/or B.P.D. and Autism! Because some of my family has Autism and possibly other health issues that I can relate!

#personal rant #depressed #pissed off #art #anime fandom

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eponymous-rose · 5 years

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Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E65 (June 4, 2019)

Are we on the internet? Probably! Either way, Travis goes falsetto and Marisha’s playing with a pillow. Brian: “We’re back. ...on the air.”

Tonight’s guests are Marisha Ray and Travis Willingham!

Announcements: Last night was a special one-off episode of Between the Sheets featuring Ashley Johnson! It’s an awfully good one, and you can watch it right this very moment if you’re subscribed on Twitch, or on Wednesday on YouTube if you’re not. The very first Between the Sheets t-shirt (”Baby Got Backstory”) is available for preorder on the site! If you missed the horror-themed promo for the shirt, it’ll come around again. There’s also a Pride t-shirt, and all the proceeds go to OutRight Action International! There’s also a huge thank-you to everyone at Denver Pop Culture Con and they marvel at the cosplay---they especially highlight a Grog who was bigger than Travis! There’s also a long discussion about Brian’s fly. Buttons are confusing.

Okay, okay, okay let’s get to Episode 65: Chases and Trees

Stats: At over 12 minutes, this was the longest DnDBeyond ad. Travis: “But what do you do? Do you edit the Oscar-worthy performance of Marisha Ray?” There’s some rambling discussion about demonetized British currency, as you do. Dani, quietly: “We have questions...” Nott rolled the 300th player Natural 20! This episode also marks the first combat encounter Beau has ended with all of her ki points still available.

It is pointed out that Travis is wearing one of Liam’s sweaters over his legs to hide his shorts. Dani: “That sweater is for our protection.” Marisha: “Everyone is blinded for 60 seconds.” Brian: “The next thing you’re going to hear in your visions is ‘Ṣ̛̪͉̭͈͍ͅP̦R̭A̘͙̲͇̭Y̦͜ͅ-͜T̡A̴̫̣͎̹N͉͍’ .”

[id: Travis coyly pushing the sweater back, revealing his untanned legs. Marisha looks amused and exasperated. end id]

Kiri was contacted for the first time in 40 episodes or 140 in-game days!

Marisha and Travis commiserate over what it’s like to be very awesome but not specifically in a flashy, magical way like the rest of the party. Marisha: “I’ll just do yoga on the horses.”

At first, Travis thought the figure in the vision was going to be Fjord’s mother, but once it played out, he realized it was probably the Wildmother and he’s definitely going to talk to Caduceus about it. “I’ll fucking sip some tea. I don’t give a shit. I’ll help him grow some dead people fungus. I’ll help him make some Smurfs.”

Marisha points out that Beau is pretty self-deprecating about her abilities, even when they include sprinting up the side of a 400-foot tree. "She assumes everyone hates her because she hates herself first. And once again, everyone around her can do crazy magic shit. She’s going to figure it out, but I think it’s going to take something. Talk to Beau. Don’t talk to me.”

Brian: “Travis, continue to sit there like my Nana watching Jeopardy while answering this question...”

Travis on Fjord: “Look, he puts on a brave, stoic face, because that’s what he saw Vandren do; that’s what people in leadership positions do: they don’t show vulnerability. Yeah, it’s a fucking facade.” With no risk to him, there’s a genuine olive branch being offered, and he’s been desperately looking for that kind of rescue. “That was huge.”

Travis notes that he used his only two spell slots to run up that tree. “I thought we were gonna have a rest before BIG BIRD showed up.”

Beau is "kind of an introvert” and does better one-on-one because there’s less vulnerability than talking in front of multiple people, and she can take more time to think about what she’s going to say. But she’s also got Dairon in the back of her head reminding her not to get close to people. “She’s got a lot of walls, still. She’s getting there, though.”

Cosplay of the Week: a wonderful Keyleth (@teaandtails, photo by Jay Villanueva). Dani notes that the antlers are huge in person!

Travis had plans both for if someone else fell, and for if he fell, which is why he was so quick off the draw. There are some memories shared of campaign one’s Goldfish Incident. Marisha: “Look, in my brain, there was nothing that could have gone wrong!”

Beau opening up to Yasha was less about comforting her (”Beau’s not a comforter.”) and more about finally being able to talk to someone who would understand. Marisha had it in the back of her mind for a while, but didn’t want to bring it up in front of everybody.

Fjord didn’t understand that the tree was connected to the Wildmother when he damaged it, but Travis figures she was probably thinking along the lines of: “Fuck, aw, c’mon-- twice?! You’re gonna dent the thing! Should we just get rid of this asshole? Chosen one, my ass. I mean, that snake thing’s not a big deal, right?”

Beau thinks of her relationship with Tori as a bit of a “what not to do”, and that whole encounter is part of why she pushes people away and has such elaborate walls. There’s a very over-elaborate analogy in which Brian brings up the hypothetical of having lactose intolerance: Marisha: “Maybe loving ice cream isn’t the thing for him! Maybe it’s better to have never loved ice cream!” Brian: “But there’s lactose-free ice cream.”

Marisha was excited to have an opportunity to use her ability to run up vertical walls. “I was stoked! First opportunity I can get. And then to get down, I was like, ‘...it’ll be fine.’”

Fjord is feeling really encouraged that the gods can intervene in his pact with Uk’otoa. “The fact that they can get around and fuck with each other’s shit... aces.”

Fan Art of the Week: the Wildmother comforting Fjord. (@_strawberryfox_)

Brian: “Are we just putting our feet up on the coffee table? Is that what’s happening?” (Henry disapproves.)

[id: Travis, Marisha, and Brian lounging with their feet on the coffee table, while Henry glances up from his nap in a judging way. end id]

Fjord wasn’t relying on Feather Fall; he was going to Misty Step when he got close to the ground if it didn’t work out. Beau was definitely relying on Nott. They’re doing a better job of trusting each other and knowing each other’s abilities, but it’s still a work-in-progress.

Marisha notes that Fjord and Beau are on a similar page re: the Dynasty. “In my head, I wonder if I’m being a Tyrion Lannister about this.” (As someone who didn’t follow that show, I am smiling and nodding nervously through this whole discussion and hoping I don’t need to transcribe something I don’t understand.) Beau’s hoping that if they can keep going, their influence will help sway the Queen in a different way, or an option will present itself to avoid this kind of conflict. Fjord is cautiously optimistic, but he thinks “she still intends to nuke them, regardless.” Beau’s also hoping to find someone else in the upper echelon of the Dynasty who might have different opinions. The word “coup” gets thrown around a bit.

There’s a spell Fjord has that he hasn’t used yet at all (Travis doesn’t remember it at the moment), since he only has the two spell slots. Beau has the Preternatural Counter ability, but hasn’t had the opportunity to use it yet (Sentinel kind of supplants it most of the time).

Brian shows off his John-Wick-and-his-dog pins. Oh dear. Travis: “...that’s a weird pin set to have.” It was, of course, a gift from Ashley.

Biggest achievement for their characters thus far? Brian points out that not dying before level 9 and having had no huge falling-outs are genuinely big achievements. Marisha: “I feel like our characters have reached that kind of awkward point, where we were fighting and trying to figure each other out, and now we’re starting to find a common goal.” Travis: “Minus Caduceus. What’s that fucking guy all about? He turns people into tea and he’s got us thinking that’s normal!”

Dani: “Episode 66 on 6/6... WHAT DOES IT MEAN?”

#critical role #critical role spoilers #talks machina #talks machina spoilers #long text post

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ingayderzim · 4 years

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not to be that person who asks a googleable question but wtf is hazbin hotel bc i googled it and the only “critical” thing i could find was a typo-ridden article of someone saying it has good animation and its haters are stupid. i was able to glean what it is/what it’s about but idk about the discourse lmao

Im actually so glad u asked this. Here's the lowdown, this is my definitive answer to hazbin shit from here on out, unless new info comes about of course.

Hazbin hotel is an independent cartoon by vivziepop. Most people (that ive seen) have agreed that the pilot of the show really isnt that great but the reason it has so many fans is bc of the entertaining livestreams, massive amounts of canon content produced (she has had these characters for years), unique art style, and the characters. (Ass ugly but unique.)

Its haters are totally justified bc of some of the "controversial" (read: bad) things vivziepop has done. Here's the conclusion that my friends and classmates (several of whom are Black, one Hispanic woman, and one trans woman...nellie if ur reading this i 💜 u) and i came to after discussing this stuff. I am NOT saying "well my black/trans friend said it's ok so i dont have to think about it!" this is based on a few different conversations that my friends and i have had about this topic so what im saying is that my opinion was formed by talking about this situation with multiple people affected by the controversy.

One controversial thing is a drawing u can easily find on google (called beastiality.jpg i believe?) It's a cropped (chest and up, but hes obv naked) drawing of vivziepops character, drawn by vivziepop, moaning, with a snake around him. The character is 17. Many people have interpreted this as child porn. I dont think this image is pornographic, i think it's a stupid joke (it was even tagged as a joke iirc) and completely inappropriate but since it's 8 years old on top of not being porn, i think it's just an example of a dumb drawing. That being said, i would NEVER argue that someone who is uncomfortable w the drawing (im uncomfortable with it! It's gross just not porn) or considers it porn is wrong. They are entitled to that opinion and i would never expose them to vivziepops work or talk about her stuff around them if they expressed to me that they disliked the image.

Another thing is that she drew a doodle of two racist TERFs. This is the one where my friends of color, my friends who are black, and my friends who are trans women took the lead. I sat back for this part and here's their and my opinion on this after talking about it and verbally going through this whole situation.

She was following these women (who had done blackface and stuff) and drew art of them. The art was a "quick doodle" that she did apologize for and she said she didn't realize the extent of their beliefs. She knew they werent great but hadnt consumed much of their content in depth. I believe her bc while ive never followed anyone as bad, ive certainly followed some pieces of shit and didnt notice for months simply bc im not online all the time and bc of the volume of people i follow, combined with the non chronological algorithms lately.

At the risk of screwing myself, im going to admit that there was about a year or so of my life where i enjoyed The Amazing Atheist. I was even subbed to him. I was a nonbinary lesbian (2 things he cant stand lmaoo) in catholic school and therefore i strictly watched his videos about theological stuff since thats what was frustrating me at the time. I had no clue the type of evil racist, transphobic, homophobic (yes ik hes bi), misogynistic things he thought, said, and did, bc i didnt watch those videos. I literally only watched select theological ones that could be of use to me while edgily debating my teachers (sorry mrs macdougal but u had it coming). I was about 15 at the time and im 19 now. Im sorry to everyone i hurt by ever having supported him. I had one of his quotes written in the inside of my religion notebook in high school. I regretted it and ripped the page out the moment i discovered the truth about him. I cant stress enough how much I HATE HIM. Thats an example of what i think happened here tho.

One of my friends who is a trans woman said (paraphrasing) "i think the worst thing shes done is that terf art but i believe the apology especially bc it was a quick drawing."

That being said, i would NEVER argue with someone who wanted nothing to do w vivziepop bc of this. That's their right. 100%. I would never expose them to her work after that.

The last thing i remember is something about a pedophilic couple in a comic but i heard it was a 17 year old and a 19 year old. Im 19 and if one of my peers did that i wouldnt say pedophile but id say ur a fucking weirdo, BUT, the kids were fake and being written by an adult so i can totally see her thinking that age gap is much less of a big deal than it really is. Like she forgot what it's like at this age. Idk how true any of that part is tho, i heard that info entirely secondhand.

Another thing to do with racism is that there's a joke within the show where one character says to the other

"don't get your taco in a twist"

"Was that supposed to be racist or sexist?"

"Whichever one pisses you off more"

I thought that was gross but one of my friends pointed out that vivziepop is of el salvadorian descent so that's her business. Like if i made a lesbian joke of equal or greater offensiveness than that and someone tried to call me lesbophobic over it id be like "that's literally my territory."

Oh speaking of which that character's name is vaggie and shes a lesbian but it's not pronounced w the same G you'd hear in "vagina." Vivziepop seems to name characters weirdly (like how in helluva boss theres a guy named blitzo and the o is silent) so maybe it's a pussy joke but i have no idea.

The animation was.................better than i could do, i wanna say the faces and gestures were good but god i remember there was a part with a car and my gf had to pause so i could laugh my ass off at it. I wouldn't describe the animation as a highlight but i liked the style in motion i thought it was a fun change. Vivziepops style is not appealing imo but i appreciate it as an art student and as someone whose friends all like she ra and steven universe where every character looks the goddamn motherfucking same, and while its chaotic and i dont care for it, the style actually works way better in motion than you'd think.

A good rule that i def use is to assume hazbin fans are guilty until proven innocent. If someone says they dont care about the discourse surrounding it and like it no matter what, RUN! They would support the show even if the creator was in fact a pedophile, or had done the blackface/was a terf herself! They probably support some horrible ppl and are probably "anti antis." A lot of them are minors tho so i'd say block and move on.

So, do i like it or not? Im an art student and all my friends like it so while i didnt think it was funny, i do fuck with it. At the convention this weekend my friends and i had a convo that led to me drawing an ahego hoodie where the faces were angel dust (a character's) face. It was a joke that i could make a killing by selling that in a booth at a con.

Theres really nothing compelling about the show but my friends like it so i join in on their conversations, and i do have a soft spot for angel dust bc he's like a worse, less amazing and gorgeous version of one of my characters, Candy, the love of my life.

A lot of people say the show was edgy/offensive and maybe im just desensitized but besides the taco thing i didnt pick up on that whatsoever??? The Archer episode "Swiss Miss" is worse than helluva boss and hazbin combined and even archer isn't offensive.

Im probably not aware of all the "discourse" (aka people being reasonably uncomfortable by weird and bad shit this random woman has done, and other ppl saying their opinions are wrong when it's literally just an opinion about a show) so if anything she's done isnt included in here it's not to defend vivziepop, this is genuinely all i know. I wouldnt describe myself as a fan of hers.

#hazbin hotel #anon

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