#WHY ARE THEY ALL 25 ITS SO FUNNY

[lunian]

I'm gonna burn somewhere worse than Hell and its my SHAME FOR TRYING IT

If a game has it so... He is not saying he is against Tav themself participating in it, thats what curious about it, THERES NO EVEN -1 DISSAPROVAL IN A WHOLE SCENE (like it would be with other more monogamous character)

MY MAN DONT BE SO EMBARASSED OMFGGGG *cries from shame with him*

Thats a high level activation of one freaky wizard's secret desires

EVEN IF HALSIN JOINS???

HE IS THE MOST INSANE PERSON TO ROMANCE WITH (VERY AFFECTIONATELY, LIKE ACTUALLY BC GODDAMN WHAT)

#25 difficulty pffff not for my tav with all perks to charisma #.....and Halsin's Guidance...i could even use own Gale's Guaidance THATS A THING #tw mature language #bg3 spoilers #gale x tav #gale romance #gale of waterdeep #gale dekarios #baldur's gate #baldur's gate 3 #mystuff #its so funny and... actually cool idk im- #he is such a freak.. as my tav so its amazing #they should have had a convo about it after WHY THEY DIDNT HAVE IT #GALE SHOW ME YOUR NOTES ARE THEY FOR WEAVE STUFF

[gibbearish]

oh psa but if you're in an industry that checks IDs and the person in front of you is clearly trans, don't make comments about anything on that ID. for instance saying "OMG your middle name's Danielle? that's my name too!!!" to someone 5 feet tall with a full beard is perhaps not the best choice one could make if one didn't want to put a neon glowing sign above that person's head saying "THIS IS A TRANSGENDER" to everyone they're with

#it is p funny tho going out places with cis / nb-and-always-presented-as-agab friends and always getting singles out abt my #id in Some Way and them always being like ??? wtf that was so weird what was up with that #and i have to be the one to be like 'remember that my id has an f on it' and theyre like :0 ....... >:0!!!! #like fuckin. the time i got id'd at goddamn jack in the box???? #she was like 'yeah we have to check it on all orders over $25' which had never happened before and has never happened since because #its fucking jack in the box so every stupid order is over $25 #for important context i was driving and bf in passenger seat was paying so id handed her his card and was way less passing than now #so once we left travis was like yo wtf that was so weird why on earth would they id someone at jack in the box????? #and im like well because i look like this and i handed her a credit card with the name travis on it and people making #up reasons to check trans-looking peoples ids to verify if theyre trans or not is unfortunately not an uncommon occurance #and he was completely floored that that was even a possibility #which like mood when i was doing bev steward literally the only thing i was thinking about on those ids was birthdays #course i was working at a theme park so we had ids from all over the country #and world but nonamericans had passports which are much more consistent than state ids #so id get handed someones id and just be like ugh ok where do they hide it on this one i have 50 people in line i dont have time for this #like why would i be wasting time casually perusing their gender marker yknow i have shit to do #so the fact that there are people who will feel the need to know that so bad that theyll do that is just wild to me and presumably him too #(working there was how we met and he ended up being bars lead then full water park sup after i left the job) #but yeah after he had his 'wait people actually do that?' realization he was just like '....well then good thing it was my card so we had to #give her my id so she'll never get to know for sure‚ get fucked' LMAO #ooh or when me and a friend went to trader joes and bought drinks cause i collect cool drink cans and when the cashier was checking #my id i made a joke to ny friend abt my picture looking like bobby hill and the cashier was like 'GASP dont say that about yourself youre #beautiful!!' which i believe i did have the beard by this point so it was a pretty obvious dig #and the picture super does look like bobby hill by the way like ill show yall if anyone's curious but literally no one irl has disagreed #except this one random woman lmao. but we get out and my friends like ????????? that was so weird #why did she say that????? and im like. well it has an f on it remember #and once again the :0 -> >:0 transformation #like it sucks having it happen but there is smth really funny abt watching friends so inclusive something like that never even #occured to them realize that thats a thing people will do and it just happened right in front of them #shoutout to my roommates friend tho who has worked at a sex shop and weed shop and changed my rewards account name for both to chosen name

[gayleafpool]

anne and sasha date for a few months or so in high school but then they break up (99% chance its sashas fault lol). they never told marcy they were dating bc they thought it would be too weird. and then sasha calls marcy and is like this is the WORST day EVER i got DUMPED. and marcy is like what kind of guy would dump u he’s so dumb and sasha is like no it was a girl 😞 and marcy is like Oh. and then she’s gotta get through this phone call while pretending this isnt the best day of her life. until of course she later finds out that the girl was anne that makes things complicated

#sasha waybright #marcy wu #sasharcy #? #in a way #love the theory going around on twitter that anne and sasha are exes its so funny theyre so dramatic they WOULD #personally i think that it goes like this: anne and sasha date in highschool. they break up. #then sasha and marcy get together in college. then after college sasha reconnects with anne and they’re both like haha all is well now #no hard feelings (this is a lie) #and anne is not sure why shes upset about marcy and sasha dating. and then they finally all date each other. it only took like 25 years

[piplupod]

today is absolute garbage but i am going to try to do some painting on my project nonetheless, doing my best to attempt to claw my way out of the suicidality goop

#funny how ppl are like ''stay alive for xyz things!'' and that doesnt work for me #like sorry but that is not making up for all the dogshit I've got going on dbdjdl it doesnt come anywhere close to balancing out the scales #if i am staying alive it is entirely my choice made out of stubbornness and occasionally spite #only reason i havent offed myself yet is bc i dont want to hurt people (even that doesnt convince me sometimes) and- #-i can always do it tomorrow. like why not just stick around until things get truly too fucked up to keep going #I'll make art while im around and hopefully leave behind some kind of positive mark on the world fjfkdl #also fucking... jack stauber's ''dinner is not over'' #like yeah dinner isnt over yet. and it wont be until i cant stand another bite. and then i can have dessert. gotta wait til dinner is done! #like do i see there being any way for me to exist in the world? no djdksl not at all #i cant work and disability is not livable and theres no disability housing available rn so fbfjdl its not realistic #but im going to stick around until i get to the point where it isnt feasible to be around anymore dhfksl #and if the situation changes for the better then great I'll keep trucking along #but i genuinely dont think im making it to like... 30. 25 is iffy. 23 is fuzzy. its just not realistic with how society is set up currently #but! doesnt matter! just working with what i have in the present and I'll just keep trucking until i cant anymore dbfjdl #suicide tw #pippen needs 2nd breakfast #sorry this is wildly mentally ill but i am just kind of ... hoping maybe it'll help someone else #all i see for suicide prevention is ''you have so much to live for!'' and that doesnt rly help ppl in my situation #i KNOW I've got a lot to live for but it's simply not realistic nor does it make up for the fact that life is utter dogshit dhdjdl #so i just try to approach it from an angle of almost like... not caring #like I'll keep doing what i can until things get too hard and then I'll take my leave 🤷 sticking around until then!

[bunnyb34r]

At every craft show there's one person who shows up and buys like 20 clothespins at once (5 for $1 painted clothespins) and every time when I look at the sales log that we sold 20+ of em "clothespins Georg was an outlier but he counted" sgdgdggd

#marquilla #i like to paint clothespins bc we use em as bag clips and i was like oh i could sell these and i really like painting them so thats why i #sell them sgdgdgd last year it was this little girl who gave me a $5 bill and said she wanted that much of clothespins SGGDGDGDGD so we #held a bag and let her pick 25 as we counted them for her and the funniest thing is that she was at the table directly behind me and went #mom look what i bought!! 😭 this year it was a lady who was gonna use them in her classroom so she picked ''only the cutest ones'' and she #was my first sale which was a nice way to start the day off #by far my favorite ever sale was when i sold a loose tooth pillow to a high school guy and he held it so lovingly and was smiling all goofy #at it like it was the cutest thing in the world 😭😭 i think so much and it always makes me laugh #he was like a big jock too which is why its funny to me

[iratusmus]

what is one peice.is it like. a bathing suit. insert panel where sally acorn is cutting up film reels here

one piece is the best selling manga of all time and it damn well deserves it

#im not sure if you meant this as a dumb joke or a genuine question but im going to answer it seriously anyways #bc if you give me the chance to talk about this series i fr will never shut up about it #im going to sum it up as best as i can given that its a 1000+ chapter ongoing manga but Basically #one piece is a long running shounen manga about friendship and freedom and adventure. and also pirates #the mc is a guy named monkey d. luffy who gets rubber hose animation style powers as a kid and wants to find the One Piece #there are many very stupid and very serious shenanigans #the humor can only be described as wildly stupid but lord its so terribly funny #and the tone of the store oscillates back and forth between #''genuinely who hurt you author . why did you feel the need to rip my heart out and stomp on it and then tear it to pieces'' #and #''real question wtf am i reading (but in the stupidest funniest possible way)'' #but not in a way thats jarring or try hard edgy #the main cast is... spectacular. like theyre so well done and such great enjoyable characters and their dynamics are just DELIGHTFUL #the mc is probably my most favorite mc of all time #the worldbuilding is insanely good and so extremely fun and flexible #there is a massive and sprawling cast but they are juggled so well and when you stop to think abt how many moving parts there are #esp in the later arcs. its like. real question author why are you so good at this #and most shockingly of all i think. is that after 25 years there is no series decay. the most recent arc is one of my most favorites #regardless if youre interested in checking it out rn is literally the best time because we're on a month long break (2 weeks in) #if you need a site i have one. also dont watch the anime unless you really just dont like reading manga bc the pacing is ABYSMAL #ask #scatman-world #also it would be SO absurdly easy to make an archie sonic crossover with it. like. so so easy. #one day ill run into somebody who likes archie and op and then we can talk about judge and locke basically being the same guy #but until then

[lecliss]

Found out through some optional Kuhn dialogue that Haseo is still high school age and uh. I mean him being an edgelord already made sense but now. It makes even more sense. Hes a teen, of course hes like this.

#atoli was giving me innocent teen vibes too but being the pure hearted heroine type. i wasnt sure if it was age related or not #its probably both then #i was suspecting he mighta been 18-22 but uh. i wasnt expecting this #he gets all edgy during the game and then when he logs out he goes to SCHOOL. whats he like in his class????? #oh you know hes the loner type that has a grudge against everyone even tho hes never interacted with his classmates #anyway. point being. new sonboy acquired. hes now my special boy and i will cherish him forever #also him an pi calling each other a brat and old hag makes more sense #i mean. im sure a 30yo and a 20yo can call each other brat and hag #but calling a high school a brat makes a lot more sense #and if it turns out pi is like 25 or so then old hag still makes sense from a teen perspective #the whole things just so funny to me cuz its like. oh! thats why youre edgy!!! youre literally like 16!!! #personal

[imthatqueerkid]

#crush blogging day 25 #i started this last night but fell asleep before i could finish #anyway #today was pretty good! aside from the fact that i was in so much pain i couid barely walk #fire boy is a very diligent father to our son Henry and is very eager to finalize the adoption process #but once again our schedules got in the way #i did get to eat dinner with him (and all of his friends but its ok because im also friends with them) #one girl who ill call Dee was almost definitely flirting with him #but it was very interesting to see that every time he answered her he looked at me which probably means something right? #but shes a very sweet person so im not going to get angry im just going to vibe #besides its not like we're official so what can i do? 'back off from my man' we haven't even held hands yet #its not like anything is confirmed im just pretending hes already professed his love to me because i have to him in my head everyday #i think we make a good couple #we're both flavors of the anxious smart one #hes the funny friend and im the responsible friend #i usually fall into one of these categories: metal‚ fancy‚ fairy‚ or sweater weather #and he he is almost always: sweaters‚ corduroy ‚ mostly reds blues and greens #so we make a very good couple aesthetically #hes so wonderful ughhhhhhh #sir why are you so pretty???? #fire boy #from the couch #Spotify

[azrielwingspan]

'Someone' (Azriel x Reader)

Summary: The IC try to pry into your life and find out who you're crushing on.

Warnings : Noooone.

He was devastatingly handsome. Unfortunately for you, it did not bode well. You were supposed to be focusing on the meeting taking place and yet all you could think about was the shadowsinger seated opposite you.

"It would be best if we were to implement our previous strategy. What do you think Y/N?"

You snapped out of your daze and blinked slowly at your brother seated next to you. He looked at you expectantly as Cassian tried to stifle a laugh.

"Uhhh...yeah..we must...indeed." you choked out.

FOOL FOOL FOOOOOL. You screamed at yourself in your head trying your level best to get back your bearings and steer the meeting in your favor.

"Although, I do think we should discuss the previous strategy in detail and draw up a plan b in case things go south."

The others at the table nodded in agreement and you held in your sigh of relief. Rhys threw a suspicious glance your way but held his tongue. The people closest to you would describe you as an extremely focused and high functioning individual. Surprisingly for them and you , you were anything but that at the moment.

Azriel hadn't uttered a single word throughout the meeting instead choosing to listen attentively and observe , his usual mannerism. You stole another glance at him and froze. Fuck.

His eyes were trained on you, the gold piercing through the flecks of green and brown. Expression unreadable, he raised an eyebrow at your befuddled face. Giving him a crooked smile and almost wincing at how you must have looked, you turned your attention back to the matter at hand. Fantastic. Absolutely, truly fucking fantastic.

Putting in a ton of conscious effort, you managed to get through the rest of the meeting without making a fool of yourself again. Eventually, the conversation at the table turned into casual chatter. After all, everyone at this table was like family. You would fight for every single one of them.

"Y/N was heartbroken. It was rather funny to be quite frank." your head snapped in the direction of Mor who was shooting you a devious grin. It took a few seconds for the realization to kick in and you almost hid your face from absolute mortification. Today was going terrible.

"I was 25!! A CHILD in fae years." You defended yourself hiding your face in your hands. Laughter rose around the table and you sank further into your chair.

"Wait.." Feyre wiped a tear off the corner of her eye, trying to hold in her laughter. "so you're telling me, Y/N fell in love with a stable boy who was terrified of her? Why was he scared? What did you do?"

"She has this weird smile she ..." Rhys saw the glare you directed his way and a smug grin made its way onto his face.

"Okay..okay..I'm sure your love life has improved since then Y/N. Tell me, who is the unlucky guy these days?" Cassian asked sending everyone into a fit on raucous laughter yet again.

You were sure that everyone had noticed the way your shoulders tensed slightly. Cursing yourself for not doing a better job at hiding your emotions, you gave a casual shrug. "No one."

"Riiiiight." Cassian leaned back in his chair and looked to Azriel who had a small smile playing on his lips.

"What do you think Az? You're the spymaster after all."

"I don't pry into others personal lives brother." Azriel leaned forward placing his elbows on the table. "But...I might know who it is."

A flare of shock pulsed through you causing your heart to thump against your chest. Azriel noticed the change in your posture and let a small smirk slide onto his face. Handsome cocky bastard. Did he know?

You didn't think so. Aside from today, you had never given a hint of anything being strange or weird. He was probably playing mind games with you.

"So there is someone then." Mor's eyes twinkled , the makings of plan behind her eyes to glean the information from you later. You told Mor everything. After all, you were the best of friends. Which is why, you couldn't bring yourself to reveal this massive crush on Azriel yet. You knew Mor didn't love him that way and yet you couldn't speak to her about it.

"You guys are delusional. There is absolutely no one and I'm quite content thankyou very much. Also, spymaster..." you emphasized his title, giving him a sour smile "you need to brush up on your skills."

Azriel bowed his head trying to hide the grin blooming on his lips. "Now...if all of you are done gossiping about my non existent love life, I'm going to go spend some quality time with my new book." You left the room before any of them could notice the red blooming high on your cheeks. What you failed to notice however was a tendril of shadow reporting to its master about your flustered state.

That night as you were drifting off to sleep, a note was slid under the door into you room. It read

"It's hard not to pry when you're involved."- 'Someone'

You would be starting your morning with a heart attack tomorrow.

PART 2 OUT NOW ! READ HERE

Part 2 sneak peek here !

A/N: Let me know if you guys have any scenarios or ideas you want to read about. Would love to hear about them!

#azriel #azriel fanfic #azriel acotar #azriel shadowsinger #azriel x reader #azriel x you #azriel x y/n #a court of thorns and roses #acotar #acotar series #azriel x female!reader #azriel fic #azriel fluff

[newtkive]

shift shenanigans - social media au (pt. 2)

note: yes there’s the main work chat w carmy, the secret coworker chat w/o carmy, and the secret secret bestie chat w syd, marcus, and yourself. it would be canon.

warnings: crude humor, slightly offensive jokes

part one

liked by carmyberzatto, marcus.brooks11 and 40 others

chefboyardee: life lately

see all 9 comments

syd_adamu: that pho was life changing

↳ chefboyardee: i think it was the best i’ve ever had

marcus.brooks11: feet off the table @syd_adamu

↳ chefboyardee: leave my girl alone

↳ richietheking: I knew you guys were lez

↳ syd_adamu: we aren’t and you can’t say that

↳ chefboyardee: oh.. we aren’t? ☹️😔

↳ syd_adamu: 😑

carmyberzatto: 🍲🔥

THE GOLDEN TRIO

[ 7:45 AM ]

y/n: did you see

did you see

did

you

see

ogmgokggkowkfofsk

syd: pardon??

what did richie do oh my god

did he post another picture of him with the gun from that one day

fuckkkk carmys gonna be so mad

marcus: nope i wish

y/n: he commented on my post 😭😭😭😭

syd: who

marcus: think about it

who else would cause this reaction

y/n: carmy!!!!!!!

i woke up to him commenting 🍲🔥 😍😍😍😍

syd: woah and the heart eyes?

y/n: no that’s my addition

syd: the bar is in hell

HES YOUR BOSS

y/n: AND I WANT HIS BABIES??

marcus: y’all so hype to be pregnant THEN BOOOMMM ‼️ THE BABY’S UGLY AND BALD WITH ECZEMA 😩🤨

syd: LMFAOOOOO WHOS YALL THO????

y/n: bye im done

im leaving for work.

don’t talk to me ever again

done.

marcus: bye 👋

why do you leave so early fool

syd: so she can be teachers pet

marcus: smh always there before everyone

y/n: not true.

syd: i thought you weren’t talking to us

y/n: 😒

marcus: want me to bring y’all an iced latte again

y/n: …. 😁

WORK

[ 8:15 AM ]

y/n: AYOOOO

great job cleaning up after work yesterday 😊👍

richie: Is this a joke?

y/n: why would i joke about such a thing

carmy: Y/n what are you doing

y/n: u said to tell everyone their housekeeping is shitty

carmy: No I said I was going to tell them that, and you said no I’ll do it

This is not what I meant

y/n: well you yell too much

marcus: ouch

that’s my station 😔

carmy: Well clean it better

y/n: im using reverse psychology and positive reinforcement

carmy: Not what that means

y/n: well notice how no one’s mad at me

im making alliances day by day

richie: You’ve worked here for two years and we are already friends

y/n: so you’re saying you aren’t my ally

richie: No

We are definitley in an alliance

y/n: love u richie

richie: Don’t go that far

chefboyardee’s instagram stories

WE HAVE THE BEEF 🥩

[ 3:25 PM ]

y/n:

he so fine im bouta cermmmmm

syd: …..

marcus: :O

y/n: why are you acting shocked

like i haven’t said this daily

tina: Woah girl who?

y/n: HUH

richie: I’m not in the picture I don’t get it

syd: let’s just keep working before carmy notices

tina: I don’t care I’m on smoke break. Who are you talking about girl? Spill the tea..

marcus: she was talking about me you guys

y/n: the guy in the back

oh i mean yeah marcus

tina: The meat delivery guy? He has a wife..

y/n: we are having an affair

marcus: no it’s about me

richie: I didn’t know Marcus and Y/n were a thing..

tina: Something ain’t right. No way they are.

marcus: we aren’t it’s just our sense of humor

y/n: i was just being funny!

tina: What did Jeff just yell inside?

syd: came out of the office and said “just cuz we’re slow doesn’t mean you can play on your phones” 👍💯

tina: Whatever. No chance Y/n meant Marcus. You got the hots for Jeffrey?

y/n: what no

tina: Well I wouldn’t blame you. He’s cute

y/n: OMG RIGHTTTTTTT

its the tattoos isn’t it

richie: You have to be fucking joking

tina: I was playing..

y/n: im confused

syd: that was cruel

marcus: who cares it’s not a big deal

y/n: so you don’t think he’s cute tina?? ☹️☹️

tina: No he is cute… for you 😝

y/n: this is humiliating

richie: I’ll tell him

y/n: NO

stop

sSTOP THATS NOT FUNNY

richie im not joking i’ll put a bomb in your floorboards

richie: I’m just fucking with you kid

tina: This isn’t over.

THE GOLDEN TRIO:

[ 3:40 PM ]

syd: y/n….

marcus: you look like a ghost y/n

y/n: i cannot believe i sent that to the wrong gc

i’m done im so done

marcus: stop looking so sad it’s making me feel bad

syd: it’s okay! just be thankful it wasn’t to the work groupchat with him in it..

marcus: true it could be worse

y/n: i guess so

thank you for trying to cover for me marcus

marcus: anytime you know i got you

syd: let’s get back to work before we start looking obvious

#carmen berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto #carmen berzatto #the bear #the bear imagine #carmy berzatto imagine #x reader #carmen berzatto imagine #sydney adamu #sydney adamu x reader #richie jerimovich #richie jerimovich x reader #the bear reader insert #the bear text au #carmy berzatto text au #crack #fluff #social media au #text au

[chiiyuuvv]

can you do bestfriends!riize who has a crush on you reacting to you calling them babe or baby? thank you and anyway i love your works!! it's so well written :]]

• PAIRING — bestie!riize x fem!reader

• GENRE — their a little slow.. fluff, my attempt at humor, honestly shit

• WORD COUNT — 462

• AUTHOR'S NOTE — sorry for not posting a bunch ive been working on some other stuff

• TAGLIST — @moonlightdarlings , @cake1box , @babigriin , @soul-is-a-strange-kid

MASTERLIST! – JOIN THE TAGLIST!

SHOTARO ☆

You had called him babe in of the members

Shotaros face red and his jaw dropped, along with the members looking around like, "their dating and their keeping it a secret?? 🤨"

Hes stuttering so much, someone help him.

Theres this stupid smile on his face and laughs bubbling out of him and hes staring at you with hearts in his eyes, hes so in love damn 😞

Definitely pulls you to the side, saying smth like "what are we??? :DD" praying on the inside you say "your girlfriend" ♡

EUNSEOK ☆

yes, you called him babe. Wait what????

"What?" Blinking at you repeatedly. give him a second hes malfunctioning

Lets out this smile that gives you the shivers, trying to calm down his racing heart

"No, youre just joking. Funny, actually."

Almost kisses you when you say you arent ♡

SUNGCHAN ☆

Goes along with it

"Yes im her babe whatcha gonna do huh?? 😡"

Drops down to his knees to kiss the back of your hand

What a damn minute..

YOU CALLED HIM BABE YOU CALLED HIM BABE YOU CALLED HIM BABE ♡

WONBIN ☆

Tries to laugh it off

Youre obviouslyyyyyyyyyy joking. He doesnt like the joke but he'll just accept it anyways

Theres noooooooooo way you like him too

So what if youre stroking his red cheek with this pretty, soft smile on your face and hes smiling back, feeling like he could fall in love all over again?????

Shoot- hes leaning it. Wait, what.. you are too???? ♡

SEUNGHAN ☆

Hes so gigglyyyyyy gosh

Wants you to say it again so he can let out a series of giggles, his face burning red as he hides it in your neck

Doesnt find your joke funny even though hes laughing his heart out :<

Looks up at you with hearts in his eyes. he wants to kiss you

He wants to make you his, call him baby forever. Will you let him? ♡

SOHEE ☆

Feel like he wouldnt notice at first, until someone like shotaro would have to slap some sense into him

"What, she just called me baby beca- OH MY GODDDDDDDDD"

feel like he would sing "love is an open door" idk why

Your words were like an energy drink, a gallon of sugar.. sugar rush rush sugar rush rush ahh????

But gets so shy when he sees you the next day ♡

ANTON ☆

Hes gone. Hes dead. Hes jumping of a bridge

Reminds me of that kermit the frog meme, the one where it falls of a building with its arms out all happily and such

Will not take his eyes off of you because what. Did. You. Just. Say????

Hes screaming, crawling up the walls on the inside (source: trust me)

Will dream about this the next 25 business days plus weekends thank you very much ♡

#kpop #riize #riize fanfic #riize fanficton #riize fluff #riize fics #riize fanfiction #riize drabbles #riize imagines #riize au #riize x imagine #riize x you #riize x reader #shotaro riize #riize shotaro #eunseok riize #riize eunseok #sungchan riize #riize sungchan #riize wonbin #wonbin riize #seunghan riize #riize seunghan #riize sohee #sohee riize #anton riize #riize anton #riize headcanons

[multifandomfanfic]

Heyy I LOVE your fics they’re so fun to read ! Tysm for posting ❤️ alsoo can I request an insta au for Charles Leclerc x dating toto Wolffs daughter reader and something funny how toto finds out about the two and he’s very supporting but gives Charles the dad talk too

A/N: Thanks so much for requesting! I really liked this one and enjoyed writing my first F1 fic! :))) Also--I took some liberties when it came to changing race results.

CL16 x Wolff!reader

f1gossip

liked by charles_leclerc, officalmiagoth, and 86,917 others

f1gossip: y/n Wolff was seen out and about today in (allegedly) her new Ferrari. Is this Mercedes princess in her rebellious phase?

yourusername: omg you called me a princess

kellypiquet: rebellion suits you @yourusername 💕

yourusername: i'm blushing 🥰

fanaccount1: girl buys a luxury car that isn't a Mercedes and people act like its the end of the world 💀

user36: It is a little bit suspicious.. user92: ok but nobody freaks out when she drinks a red bull

yourusername added to their story

mercedesamgf1

liked by f1, georgerussell63, charles_leclerc, and 834,023 others

mercedesamgf1: It's time to decide this weekend's best dressed -> vote in the comments below! 👕👀

yourusername: not George

georgerussell63: i didn't come here to be bullied

susie_wolff: Y/N ♥

charles_leclerc: I second that mercedesamgf1: We third it! yourusername: I'm flattered 🥰

fanaccount2: y/n is so pretty 😍😍

fanaccount3: Uhhhhh, why is Charles here?

yourusername added to their story

(the first story is no longer available)

lando.jpg

liked by yourusername, f1gossip, danielricciardo, and 519,416 others

lando.jpg: australia part one ft. two of my favorite people

yourusername: i think you added some extra words there. should say "my two favorite people."

lando.jpg: would you like it to say two of my least favorite people? yourusername: nope the original is fine <3

pierregasly: someone's going to be in trouble 👀

yourusername: shhhh... maybe they won't figure it out danielricciardo: if it wasn't so obvious already fanaccount4: Excuse me???

user66: Awesome photos! ✨✨

user01: Charles 😍

comment liked by yourusername user01: y/n???

yourusername

liked by susie_wolff, sukiwaterhouse, charles_leclerc, and 1,092,472 others

yourusername: thanks for the memories miami ♥ (and thanks for the free vacation, dad)

susie_wolff: He says you're welcome!

yourusername: 🥰

pierregasly: miss wolff 👀

yourusername: no. charles_leclerc: no. danielricciardo: no. fanaccount5: not daniel too 😭😭

fanaccount6: I wish I was there! fanaccount7: i wonder whose yacht that is 🤔

yourusername added to their story

yourusername

liked by lilymhe, charles_leclerc, mercedesamgf1, and 2,192,357 others

yourusername: first of all, i would like to thank my dad for giving charles, a 25 year old man, "the talk" after he discovered we're dating. in the middle of the barcelona paddock. we both thoroughly enjoyed that. (dad, if you're on susie's phone again, i do love you and thanks for putting up with everything)

secondly, i love you, @charles_leclerc. you've been the light of my life for the past six months and i wouldn't trade the time we've spent together for the world. i can't wait to grow old with you.

comments on this post have been disabled

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, f1gossip, mickschumacher, and 4,150,718 others

charles_leclerc: @yourusername, l'amour de ma vie

comments on this post have been disabled

#charles leclerc #cl16 #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc x y/n #charles leclerc x wolff!reader #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc fluff #cl16 x reader #charles leclerc insta au #charles leclerc instagram au #f1 instagram au #f1 insta au #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #ferrari fanfic #cl16 fanfic #wolff!reader #insta au #instagram au #charles leclerc instagram edit #f1 #formula 1 #fanfic #fluff #imagine #cl16 x you #cl16 x y/n #cl16 fluff #cl16 insta au

[nickfowlerrr]

This picture has ruined me. Now I need a fic with Bucky as your professor banging you in the library during regular hours.

clear your mind

pairing: professor!bucky barnes x curvy!reader

words: 7.5k

warnings: 18+ ONLY. smut. public sex. cockwarming. student/teacher relations. possible age gap depending on how you read it (reader is at least 25 or older but it’s not really specified and bucky is late 30s or older but again, not specified. imagine whatever you like.) i added an alternate kind of darkish ending that is separated with a divider near the end (duh) but of course you can choose to not read it and stick to the original cute ending lol. if i’m missing anything you feel needs to be added, please let me know.

notes: disclaimer: i never technically went to college so i don’t really know what i’m writing about lmao but when i say this was instant inspo, i mean instant. i’ve been in such a funk since i lost chapter four of keeping secrets, but this really ignited something in me so i just went for it. it was originally gonna be a little smutty drabble but then i started writing and it just became a whole one shot - not that i’m complaining lol. this was so fun to write, thank you @sammyisfat for sending it in! 🖤 i hope you all enjoy it! as always, feedback and comments are welcome and appreciated. and thank you in advance for reading and reblogging!

You were sitting hunched over, eyes scanning the same sentence repeatedly, trying to force yourself to focus. You were reading the words but you weren’t really putting them together. You were too bored to make them make sense. Your brain was far off and you were sure you were about to burn out completely at this point.

Why you thought going back to school after so long was a good idea was beyond you. Was the degree really worth it? You’d gotten this far without one, hadn’t you?

As you were contemplating your life choices, and working on convincing yourself to just screw it and drop out, you’d failed to notice the presence of two of your professors passing by.

You had been alone at the far back of the library, closed in by the sturdy cases of books around you, for so long you’d nearly forgotten you were actually there. You had needed solitude, lest the chatter of other students in study groups or working on projects distract you further than your mind already did on its own. Your back was to the open aisle so as not to get distracted by anyone passing by, either. The zone you were occupying was normally a hot spot, but on a Wednesday afternoon, not so much. And for that you were grateful.

The knock on the bookcase next to you accompanied by your name being called, almost in question, startled you as you quickly corrected your posture and looked toward the noise, adjusting the glasses you were wearing as you did. You were greeted with two pairs of blue eyes looking back at you. Standing next to the bookcase, waiting for your response were two of the most lusted after professors on campus. And that wasn’t just you thinking so. The way students fawned over both Mr. Barber and Barnes was near juvenile. They were like kids gossiping about their crushes in elementary school. It was always funny to you seeing the line of people waiting to speak with Andy at the end of class every Wednesday and Friday, whether they had a genuine question to ask or not. You couldn’t say you didn’t get it, though. He had great hair, a soft smile, kind eyes.. He was gorgeous. It was clear why so many people had a thing for him. But you always found yourself a little more than preoccupied with thoughts of Mr. Barnes. Though they were both at least six foot tall and unfairly attractive, easy enough to spread your attention between both of them, as most of their students did, there was just something about James that had you in a hold since the first day you met him.

It was your first day on campus and you’d accidentally bumped into him with your green tea as you were leaving the small corner cafe after your first morning class. You apologized profusely, but he’d claimed it was his fault, that he wasn’t watching where he was going. He insisted on buying you a new drink as he removed his tea damp jacket. You didn’t fight him on it, walking back into the cafe as he held the door for you. You introduced yourselves as you waited for the drinks to be made and spoke a bit. It wasn’t a super long interaction, both of you having places you had to be, but you would have sworn there was something there. And the glimmer in his eye as he smiled and told you he’d see you around convinced you it wasn’t one sided. You were instantly smitten, hopeful you would see him again, that maybe it could lead to getting to know him better, lead to something more.

That was until you walked into your afternoon class the next day to find him standing at a podium, setting up his orientation slides. You had been hoping all day to run into him, but this was certainly not how you’d been imagining the circumstances. Of course he was your professor. You breathed a humorless laugh to yourself as you found a seat. You got your laptop out and looked back up at the same time he looked up from his, making direct eye contact with him. You saw the instant he recognized you and gave him a tight lipped smile that he returned before you diverted your gaze back down. His look of disappointment matched your own, but at the very least, it made you feel wanted.. The “professor x student” trope was never really your cup of tea, but as the weeks went by, the stolen glances and secret longing stares you exchanged were starting to change your mind. After one particular heated night of self pleasure, absentmindedly picturing him while you were reveling in your own touch, imagining it was his, you knew you were really gone for him. And heaven help you, the idea of it really happening was growing hotter and hotter the more you told yourself you couldn’t. Imagining showing up to his office hours one evening and just letting him have you any way he liked. Letting him take you apart on his desk, or sucking him off under his desk while he works. God, you’d daydreamed so many scenarios.

You just couldn’t bring yourself to act on any of it. You didn’t know how to. More importantly, you knew you shouldn’t. It wasn’t like you were some barely legal star eyed student he’d be taking advantage of, but still, you were his student. You weren’t sure how that dynamic might play out or the optics of it for either of you. Instead you willed yourself to stay focused on the work, to keep your thoughts set on passing the course and that was all.

Even when you would find yourself needing actual help from him or needing to ask him about an assignment, you would always talk yourself out of it. You didn’t want to let yourself be alone with him, you couldn’t be trusted. You were worried you’d make a fool of yourself the second you got the chance. So instead, you’d get help from a classmate if you could or you’d end up just winging it. It had been working that far.

The real problem started just last week. This most recent section was challenging to say the least. You had tried the study group offered on Monday nights, but you got absolutely nothing done.

Your last essay assignment had been returned to you on Friday with a note on it, asking you to come by his office hours before the next class. You had been putting it off all week, but knew you’d have to go by Thursday. You just weren’t expecting to see him around any earlier than that.

“Professors,” you greeted, slightly taken aback.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you,” Mr. Barber apologized. “Thought you might’ve heard us walking up.”

“I was uh, lost in the text, I guess,” you replied, giving them an awkward smile.

“Well, I’m glad someone’s reading it,” he laughed.

“Do you mind if we join you?” he continued, motioning to the otherwise empty table you were sitting at the end of. It was big enough to seat at least 8 people easily and it’d, of course, be rude of you to try and keep it for yourself. But what would they need to be in the library for anyway? The question must have been written on your face as Mr. Barnes answered it for you.

“The heat isn’t working in our offices. We’re just grading some work.”

“Right, yeah, of course. Go for it.”

“Thank you,” Andy smiled.

They took seats at the other end of the table, surely trying to avoid distracting you. You appreciated the gesture, but it was futile. As they worked on grading papers, they were talking and laughing every so often and even if they hadn’t been, their presence alone was not at all aiding you in your attempt to focus on schoolwork.

You’d given up trying to finish the passage you’d been reading and instead pretended to start making notes in your laptop. In all actuality, you were really just googling alternative career paths and the question: “Do you really need a college degree to be successful?”.

Thirty minutes later, Andy’s phone went off and he began to gather his things, telling Mr. Barnes, who he called ‘Bucky’, that he had a lecture in 45 minutes but he’d see him later.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Andy pointed at you as he passed by.

“Bright and early,” you affirmed with a nod and a small smile.

“Have a good night,” he smiled back.

“You too,” you returned.

The second he was gone, you became fully aware that you were now alone with Professor Barnes, the situation you’d been trying to avoid for the past almost three months. Despite your efforts, your entire focus was being pulled to the man just down the table from you. He was still grading, in the middle of someone’s essay as you glanced over to him. You admired the quirk of his brow as he read and how his tongue jutted out to lick his lip as his eyes scanned the words on the page. You pulled your gaze away from him and back to your laptop, deciding to close it and put it away, begrudgingly returning to your textbook. Just one more hour. You had promised yourself 2 hours of studying today minimum, you were halfway there. You could do it.

Not ten minutes later you heard the flipping of paper and glanced over to see he’d just finished the paper he was on, writing the grade on top of the first page. You looked back to your text just as he slid the paper down the table to you. You furrowed your brows as you watched it slide into your book. You saw the “C-” he had given it circled in red ink and immediately recognized the title. Your lips parted and you clicked your tongue as you looked back up to meet his eye.

“Anyone else that would’ve been a D,” he told you, sounding slightly disappointed. “Your work is normally a lot better than what you’ve been turning in lately. That’s why I asked you to come by my office hours.”

“Yeah, I- uh. I don’t know, I’ve just been having a hard time with this section,” you explained. “And I wasn’t ignoring your note, I was planning to see you on Thursday.”

“Well, we’re both here now, right?” he said and you nodded.

“Good a time as any,” you shrugged.

He got up and moved his stuff down the table to take the seat next to you. You closed your textbook and straightened up in your chair. Nerves eating at you as he sat and turned to angle himself towards you.

“My main concern isn’t really about you understanding the materials, all the concepts are there in your work, it's just..lackluster. Sloppily written, a bit jumbled here and there. Nothing like what you had been turning in at the start of the semester,” he said. “Are you sure it’s the section you’re having a hard time with?”

You looked at him for a moment, not really knowing what to say.

“What else would I be having a hard time with?” you questioned quietly.

It was his turn to look at you for a moment as he thought about how to word his response. He opened his mouth to say something but seemed to think better of it before he finally spoke.

“You’ve seemed more and more distracted during class lately. I just want to make sure you’re okay,” he said sincerely, his blue eyes gleaming into yours. He was already close, but you suddenly found yourself mindlessly leaning closer to him. You took a breath as you sat back, licking your lips ever so lightly without realizing as you looked away.

“I’m okay,” you told him. “Sorry I’ve seemed distracted. Well, uhm, been distracted. I don’t know why I’ve been having such a hard time focusing on this,” you lied, “but I appreciate your concern. I’ll work on being more present. And putting more effort into my writing.”

He smiled softly and nodded before he turned back in his seat, returning to his pile of papers.

You bit your lip as you sat there. Of course you knew why you were so distracted, but you couldn’t just tell him it was because of him.

“You know there’s a study group you can sign up for,” he said as he was still looking down, reading the new paper in front of him, red pen in hand.

“Yeah, I know. I just, uh, work better in smaller groups,”

“Alone isn’t exactly a group,” he lightly smirked with a slight tilt of his head.

“I’ve never really had the best focus when it comes to studying, anything. I get off topic and then I get everyone else off topic and then we end up having spent the entire session debating something trivial, like who the best Batman is,” you said.

“Christian Bale,” he responded.

“Obviously,” you agreed with a smile. “But uhm, yeah. Less distractions the better, so I try to avoid big groups. Though I’ll admit, just trying to stay focused on my own is a feat in and of itself,” you laughed lightly.

“Sounds like you just need someone other than yourself to hold you accountable. Have you thought about one on ones? I offer tutoring sessions that no one seems to want to take me up on,” he laughed. “I have three one hour sessions all still open for tonight, actually.. Not that you need tutoring, but you could use the time to work on your assignments without distractions - and I'd be there, of course, if you need any help.”

You told yourself to say no. You really did..

“Well it couldn’t hurt, right?” you breathed, a small smile on your lips. Just then the clock chimed three, drawing both of your attention.

“I have a class in twenty, I have to get going. But I’ll be in my office from five to eight, you can come whenever. Like I said, no one else has signed up, so whenever you can make it. Hopefully the heat should be working by then.”

“Okay,” you agreed. “Thank you, Professor.”

“Please, James is more than fine,” he told you. “I’ll see you later.”

When he left, you packed up your things - letting yourself off the hook for your two hour promise. You were gonna be studying later now, anyway so it wasn’t like you just checking out for the day. Your apartment wasn’t too far from campus, so you drove home and decided you’d head back around 6.

You made yourself a late lunch/early dinner and then got your things together for when you’d leave. You figured you had time for a quick nap, so you laid down on the couch with the tv still playing in the background. After about 45 minutes, you woke up feeling more flustered than you had felt all week. You were starting to regret your quick agreement to his one on one offer, but you couldn’t just not show up now. You were getting yourself worked up over nothing, you were sure. Really what could you do that would be so bad? It’s not like you were planning on seducing the man. You’d probably just ask him to review the essay you’d been working on that would be turned in at the next class and ask for clarification on the requirements for the part of your midterm paper you’d been confused about for the past two weeks. You probably wouldn’t even stay the whole hour.

Checking the time, you decided to head back to campus. You’d get to his office a little after 5 and you’d be home by 6:30 at the latest. It’d be fine.

As you walked up to the sturdy oak door that led to his office, two cups of coffee in hand, your nerves started anew. You took a second before you knocked lightly. A few moments later, the door was pulled open as he greeted you, ushering you in.

“I got you a coffee,” you offered with a smile.

“That’s very much needed, thank you,” he smiled back, taking the drink you’d extended to him. “Please, have a seat.”

You took the only chair across from his desk as he sat.

“So, I was wondering if you’d be able to go over my essay for this week. See if it’s missing anything, or if it needs to be rewritten entirely,” you laughed nervously.

“Yeah, of course,”

“Great,” you breathed, “I just emailed you a copy.”

He pulled it open on his screen and you watched for a moment as he began reading before you pulled out your laptop to work more on your midterm. You couldn’t focus though. Not with him right across from you. The little noises he’d make as he read caught your attention repeatedly and when you’d glance up, you’d find yourself admiring the shape of his face, the quirk of his lips, the squinting of his eyes.

“The whole point of this is so that you have no distractions,” he said as he continued reading before turning to look at you. “Something distracting you?” he asked, his eyes finding your own with something akin to a playful glimmer shining in them.

You opened your mouth to speak but you just shook your head instead, taking a steadying breath.

“No,” you answered after a second. He looked at you hard.

“You sure about that?” he asked again.

“No,” you repeated softly.

“Well since you can’t seem to focus on what you’re working on, why don’t you come over here and we’ll go over this together.”

You stared at him, gawking before your body finally moved. You stood up and he did the same, pulling his chair back for you to sit in as you rounded the desk. He pushed you back in and then leaned down behind you so he was at the same height you were, looking at the screen.

You were stiff and you felt like you couldn’t breathe. He was so close. And he smelled so good. And he was so pretty. God, you didn’t know what to do. You really couldn’t focus, even as he read your words aloud and went over a line you’d blubbed.

“Are you listening to me?” he asked, standing to his full height as he spun the chair around, looking down at you. Your eyes immediately landed on his crotch before you quickly looked away, trying to not look so flustered.

“Sorry,” you eked out.

“It’s obvious you have something on your mind. You’re clearly distracted,” he said, finding your eye. “I think you just need to clear your head to find your focus.”

“Right, well, I don’t really know how to do that,” you breathed.

“Why don’t you let me try to help,” he returned softly as he leaned down and grabbed your chin, tilting your face up to meet his as he leaned in, brushing his lips against yours.

You were definitely not expecting this to happen, but you weren’t upset in the least. His lips were soft and he tasted like coffee. Your hand found his hair as you pulled him closer to you, the gentle kiss turning into something hungrier the longer it went on. He pulled away suddenly and pulled you out of his chair before taking his seat and pulling you down onto his lap just as quickly, his lips returning to yours the instant he had you on him. Your arm wound itself around his neck as your other cupped his jaw, keeping his face close to you as he held you close to him.

Slowly, his hand traveled under your sweater and along your waist, causing goosebumps to rise on your skin. He easily slipped his tongue into your mouth, eliciting a moan from you as he did. You felt his erection growing as you sat on his lap, smiling into the kiss as you teasingly rubbed against him, earning a groan from him in response. He broke away from you for a moment as you both caught your breath, “Tell me if you want to stop,” was all he said before he maneuvered you with ease. He sat you on the edge of his desk while he took your boots off before he pulled your leggings down your thick thighs, his touch sending chills through you as he did.

He made quick work of his trousers, pulling them down before he took himself out of his briefs. He sat back down on his chair as he looked at you with lust filled eyes. “Stand up,” he told you. When you were standing before him, he pulled you close by your wide set hips before his fingers hooked the band of your thong, dragging it down until they were past your thighs and dropped to your ankles. “Step out of them, sweetheart.”

You did as he said before he pulled you closer and got you onto the chair, positioning you so you straddled his lap, barely hovering above his hard cock. You were breathing heavily as your hands grasped his shoulders and his hands held your fleshy hips. He looked up at you like he was waiting for your permission and so you nodded softly down at him. He gripped himself with one hand and moved the tip of his cock along your wet slit, you gasped in unison at the feeling. He took his time and just played with you a bit until you were moaning, whining above him. Your eyes squeezed shut as he circled your clit before he moved to finally align his cock up to your slick entrance. He pushed his tip just inside of you and groaned at the sensation, his hands returning to your hips as he gripped you tightly, holding you there despite you wanting desperately to take more of him.

“James,” you whined. He shook his head.

“Call me Bucky,” he instructed headily.

“Bucky,” you whined further, trying to lower yourself further onto his cock.

“I know, I know, sweetheart,” he laughed. “Feels good, doesn’t it?”

“Mhm,” you moaned as he took your lips in his again.

“You want more? Want more of my dick inside you?”

“Yes, yes, Bucky, please,” you mewled.

“Don’t worry, I’m gonna give it to you,” he said, kissing you along your neck, “but then you’re gonna focus on your work, okay?”

“Okay,” you agreed without really hearing him. You just needed more, you needed all of him.

He pulled you down further onto his cock torturously slowly as you gasped and mewled until he was seated fully inside of you.

“Fuck,” he grunted, eyes shutting in pleasure at the feeling of your tight walls squeezing him, at the warmth of your cunt around him.

You tried to move, but were stopped again by his hands holding you in place. He tutted as he looked at you, a smirk playing on his lips.

“What do you think you’re doing, sweetheart? We just agreed you’re gonna focus on your work now,”

“Huh? Right, right now?” you huffed.

“Right now,” he told you firmly.

You pouted as you leaned against his chest, your face pressing into his neck, even just that movement sparking pleasure through you.

“No pouting,” he laughed against your temple. You turned your face up to him, pout still in place before you leaned up further to kiss him again. Slow and heated, he got lost in your kiss. He almost didn’t stop you when you started rocking your hips against him. Almost.

You whined again as he held you still. His strength was impressive, you had to admit.

“Stop. Moving,” he growled, sending a new wave of arousal through you. “You’re gonna sit right here on my cock while we go over your essay and if you do a good job listening to me and stay focused, I’ll give you what you really want after. Understand?”

“Yes, professor,” you said quietly.

“Good,” he smiled, caressing your cheek as he looked down at you.

It was thirty five minutes of pure torture. He read a loud your entire essay and had you make corrections as he went, the entire time you could feel his thick cock throbbing inside your dripping cunt, just begging for any kind of movement. Near the end of your essay corrections, his hand dropped from your hip until he found your clit, slowly beginning to rub it in tight circles. You mewled pathetically and your walls tightened around his dick still deep inside of you while his lips attacked your neck with gentle kisses and love bites.

“You did so well, sweetheart,” he praised. “You took this from a C to an A with just thirty minutes of actual focus. All you had to do was face your distractions head on, find the right motivation,” he smirked against your skin.

“So we’re done with the editing then, right?” you asked.

“Mhm,” he hummed against you.

“Great,” you breathed as he brought you closer with his every touch.

“Fuck, you’re squezzing me so tight,” he groaned.

“I’m gonna come,” you mewled, breathing heavier still as his left hand tightened on your hip and his fingers worked your bud faster, sending you head first into your orgasm, his name falling off your tongue as you cursed and panted through your high, collapsing onto his chest.

“Oh my god,” he whined with a small gasp, his eyes squeezing shut. “Fuck, can I come inside you?” he asked. You nodded your answer as you were still trying to catch your breath. He grabbed your face and crashed his lips into yours, hot and needy, while you felt him tense suddenly as his cock pulsed inside you and he moaned deeply into your mouth as he let himself go, you could feel the warmth of his release against your walls.

The evidence of your orgasm was all over his lap, coating his dick as he pulled you off of him.

“Holy fuck,” he panted. You didn’t think it was possible, but you felt yourself heat up even more than you already had been. “Hand me a tissue,” he said pointing to the box he had on the corner of his desk.

He cleaned himself up quickly before he pulled his briefs and trousers back up. He had you again on the edge of his desk as he bent down to clean you up, too, admiring the way his cum was leaking out of you before he grabbed your leggings from the floor, handing them to you. He pocketed your thong before he stood back up to his full height, towering over you.

“That was nice,” he laughed softly as he leaned down closer to you, his right hand framing your face, tilting it up to meet his eye, his thumb gently stroking the soft skin of your cheek before he leaned in to place a chaste kiss on your lips.

You smiled in response. “Yeah, it was,” you agreed.

“I hope you don’t find this inappropriate, but I’ve wanted you since the day we met.”

“The feeling is more than mutual,” you assured him. “But uhm. Is this..,” you gestured between the two of you, “allowed?” you questioned as you hopped off his desk to pull your leggings on.

“Well, it’s certainly not encouraged, but there’s nothing in my contract that explicitly prohibits it. I made sure a few months ago,” he said, eyeing you with a shy smile as if he hadn’t just come inside you after making you cockwarm him for nearly 45 minutes. It made you laugh. “I would prefer to keep this between us for as long as we can, though,” he hedged.

“Yeah, I completely agree. Don’t need these kids gossiping about me, too.”

“They do love to talk, don’t they?” he grimaced, causing you to smile at him.

“I’m sure we can keep this under wraps,” you said as you pulled your boots back on. “And I’d like to sign up for next week's one on one sessions, too, if you're available.”

“I’ll be sure to block it out for you,” he grinned.

“Might as well make it a standing weekly appointment,” you suggested as you walked back over to him from where he was perched on his desk.

“Sounds like a good idea,” he responded as he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you closer while you stared up at him, your arms wrapping around him in return. “Are you free for dinner tomorrow night?”

“Dinner?” you questioned, pulling back slightly. “That doesn’t sound very underwraps,” you teased.

“A private dinner. At a private residence. My residence,” he clarified with a smirk.

“I’m free,” you nodded as you backed away and went to the other side of the desk as he turned around to watch you.

“Great, I’ll message you the address.”

“I’ll keep an eye out for it,” you said as you grabbed your bag and slipped your laptop back inside of it. “I should get going, but, thank you. For everything,” you simpered. “I really appreciate your help.”

“Anytime, sweetheart. My door’s always open. I’ll see you tomorrow,”

“Tomorrow it is,” you nodded in agreement as you walked to the door. But before you could open it, Bucky was behind you, turning you around to face him. His lips met yours in a soft, unrushed kiss before he pulled away slowly, opening the door for you.

“Have a good night,” you breathed.

“You, too,” he smiled.

Three weeks later you had a routine set in place. Nothing changed much in class, except you found yourself paying more close attention to the material now that you weren’t so hopelessly longing for your professor. Wednesday’s were your one on one sessions in Bucky’s office and Friday nights had been spent at his place. This last week, you’d even stayed the three day weekend with him. You knew you weren’t crazy when you had thought there was something real between the two of you when you had first met, but you didn’t expect to have clicked so well the way you had. Your chemistry was unbelievable and you got on so well together. Plus the sex was incredible.

Fucking in his office was so cliche, but that didn’t make it any less hot. In fact, it was really the only place you called him “Professor” these days. The title just made things that much sexier. It was Wednesday afternoon and you’d just gotten out of your last class for the day. You were going to head to Bucky’s office in a few hours, planning to go to your apartment to freshen up before picking up some food for you both on your way back.

You’d just finished changing into more…accessible clothes when your phone rang. It was a text from Bucky letting you know that the heat in his office wasn’t working again, so you’d have to meet in the library instead as they’d be working on the unit in his room. You frowned slightly, accepting that you’d changed for nothing, but at least the skirt was still comfortable. You texted back asking if you should still bring food and he promised he’d take you somewhere after instead. Apparently only two of his students in his 3:20 class showed up, so he dismissed them for the day. He was already on his way to the library, so you grabbed your things and headed back to campus.

You walked around the library looking for him with no luck before you decided to walk up to the second level, which was technically closed off for some construction work, in order to get a better view. You spotted him easily in the far back section of the lower level as you stood at the railing of the second floor. He was sipping on a cup of coffee and you smiled as you spied a cup of tea waiting for you next to his satchel on the table while he read over some work.

You walked back down to the first floor and made your way to him.

“Professor,” you greeted as you knocked on the bookcase blocking the table he was at from an easy view. He greeted you in return as he looked up from his work, a smile on his face. His eyes caught on the low v-neck of the top you were wearing, your cleavage on perfect display. His tongue jutted out along his lower lip as he admired the view. You cleared your throat as you looked at him with a raised brow.

He looked back up to your eyes, smiling charmingly as if he hadn’t just been caught leering at you so openly.

“I’m here to study, not be perved on,” you accused.

“You know you need to clear your mind to get your focus, first. And you know what helps clear your mind best,” he alluded.

“You know we’re in public, right?” you asked, voice hushed as you walked closer to the table.

“It’s a Wednesday, no one’s gonna come back here,” he said smoothly. “We’re hidden from sight.”

“Not true,” you denied. “I saw you from the second level,” you informed him.

“Was anyone up there?” he asked.

“No..”

“Didn’t think so,” he said smugly.

“There’s not right now. Anyone could come in at any time. It’s the middle of the day.”

“You’re right,” he aquesqued, hands up. “All work, no play today. I got you a tea,” he offered.

“Thank you,” you smiled as you took the seat across from him.

“Wow, why are you sitting so far?”

“Where do you want me to sit?” you laughed.

“Preferably, my lap,” he started, earning a humored scoff from you. “But right here would be good, too,” he said, gesturing to the seat next to him.

You got up and moved spots, getting comfortable before you pulled up your essay on your laptop.

“Still going through midterms?” you asked as you looked over to him making marks on the paper he was reading.

“Yeah,” he replied.

“Have you gotten to mine yet?”

“Not yet,” he said absently.

You nodded as you took a sip of your tea. You looked back to your essay and found yourself trailing off. It was pretty much finished, just needed to be read through again for any edits you needed to make. It wasn’t enough to keep your attention. Too easy. You could do it later no problem.

Instead you took out your text for Andy’s class and started reading next week’s assignment. You didn’t have much else to do. Funnily enough, you’d been getting most of your work done earlier than normal so you’d have less to actually do on Wednesdays, instead spending your “study” time focusing on other things…

You weren’t paying attention to anything, lost in perverted thoughts of last week when Bucky had fucked you agaisnt the wall in his office, while twirling your pen as you stared down blankly at the words on the page, not reading them at all. Pulling you from your perversions, suddenly you felt Bucky’s hand smooth its way under your skirt and up your thigh. His hand was so warm and strong as he touched you, sending chills through you as he scooted his chair closer to yours. You didn’t stop him and absentmindedly spread your thighs for him as he inched his way closer and closer to your inner thighs before his fingers made their way between them, gently rubbing at your warm, barely clothed pussy.

You came back to earth as you remembered where you were and reached your hand under the table to hold his, stopping his movements.

“What exactly do you think you’re doing, professor?” you breathed.

“Helping,” he responded. “What did I say about distractions, sweetheart?”

“Who says I’m distracted,” you whispered as you heard chatter coming from the other side of the bookcase before it passed as some students made their way to the front desk from the back office you weren’t too far off from.

“You have that far off look in your eyes,” he spoke quietly, “and I saw you squeezing your thighs together not ten seconds ago.” You exhaled a breath so softly you barely even heard yourself.

“Maybe we can end this session early and call it a day?” you asked, wanting to get out of the library and meet him back at your place, or hell, meet him at his car and let him take you apart in the faculty parking lot.

“No, I don’t think so. We both have some work left to do.”

“Bucky,” you whispered.

“No calling me Bucky outside my office while we’re on campus,” he reminded you. “You know better.”

You bit your lip before whispering sorry.

“You just need to face your distractions so you can get past them,” he said. “Let me help.”

You let go of his hand beneath the table and spread your thighs a little wider.

You almost stopped breathing completely when he slipped his fingers past your panties and gently pushed inside of you as one of the librarians passed by the aisle over. She peered behind the bookcase that was shielding you from the side to see who was at the tables and greeted both of you quietly before she returned to the aisle and reshelved some books. Bucky’s fingers didn’t stop for even a second as he returned her greeting and went back to grading.

The second you knew she was gone you panted a breath. “James,” you chastised as you sat in your seat still, making no attempt to actually stop him.

“More?” he questioned without looking up from his work, only speeding up his fingering, curling them inside of you. You bit down harshly on your lip to stop yourself from moaning out loud, your thighs tensing with the impending wave of pleasure you were teetering on before he slipped his fingers out of you, a school boy smirk playing on his lips.

You exhlaed heavily and shakily before looking over to him, shocked. He finally looked back at you, still smirking.

“I wanna try something. If you want me to stop, tell me,” he said as he removed his hand from your thigh and stood up abruptly. You could see the outline of his erection through his trousers and found yourself getting more aroused. You didn’t know what he wanted to do, but assumed it'd be something at least a little discret. Along the lines of putting you in his lap again, or even just having you get him off. So when he pulled you up and spun you around, pushing you down against the table, you were surprised to say the least. You heard him unzip his pants as he pulled himself free and then pulled your panties down your thighs. You couldn’t even think as he prodded you with his cock, and gasped loudly when he finally pushed into you. His hand was on your mouth in an instant as he leaned over your back, his mouth next to your ear as he spoke. “Gotta be quiet, sweetheart,” he panted. “You don’t want anyone to see us back here, do you?”

Your gurgled moan was his response as he began fucking into you, keeping your chest firmly againt the sturdy table, one hand on your mouth and one holding your wrists behind your back. You were panting as quietly as you could as he slid in and out of you, getting deeper with each thrust. He took his hand away from your mouth after a moment and gripped your hip to keep you a little more steady, trying to keep your hips from slamming so hard into the wood. The salacious sounds of his pelvis slapping against your ass with his thrusts were only making you more slick as he moved his hand from your wrists to keep your skirt pushed up as he fucked you from behind.

It was taking all of your willpower to keep quiet, your mouth open in silent moans as you tried to keep yourself breathing. His thrusts were getting more powerful the longer he went. Each time you heard people passing by, your cunt gripped his cock even tighter at the thrill of the proximity, and Bucky didn’t miss it.

“Who knew you were so fucking kinky,” he panted into your ear. “You like getting fucked in public, huh? Like the idea of anyone walking by and seeing you get fucked out of your mind? Seeing you getting claimed by me,” he husked.

You mewled as quietly as you could and nodded your head in affirmation. “I like it,” you whispered pathetically.

“I know you do,” he laughed before fucking into you deeper, making sure you felt every inch of his thick cock gliding against your velvety walls, squeezing him tightly.

“Professor, please,” you pleaded quietly.

“Fuck, sweetheart,” he grunted as he gripped your hip harder still, pulling your ass flush against him before he began rutting into you desperately. He leaned his weight onto you as he kept you pushed down, flush against the table. His hand left your skirt and found your clit, adding to the growing pressure building in your abdomen as he rubbed you, fucking you and stimulating all the most sensitive spots along your walls. Before you knew you were, you came completely undone, the familiar white hot pleasure induced euphoria spreading through you as you came around him, squeezing him like you never wanted him to leave you empty again. And truth be told, you didn’t. You’d never felt so fulfilled or satisfied in your life.

He could barely move as you came around him, but after a few more thrusts, he shot his load inside of you, cursing under his breath as he came, panting. After a moment, he pulled out gently and slid your panties back up for you, pushing your skirt down before he fixed himself. You were still reeling from the intensity of it all when you stood, a little wobbly, from the table.

Cute planned ending:

“I can’t believe we just did that,” you breathed, turning around to face Bucky. “We really just did that,” you said, still in shock at yourself while Bucky grinned proudly before looking around a bit, just making sure you were still alone. He grabbed you by your waist and pulled you close, leaning down to kiss you deeply, letting you go for a second before kissing you harder again.

“We did. And now,” he said, ushering you back to your seat, urging you to sit down, “you're gonna finish editing your paper while I grade a few more of these midterms, no distractions.”

“Easy for you to say,” you muttered as you looked up at him still standing while you were seated once again. “I’m the one sitting here with come leaking out of me,” you complained.

“Is it that distracting for you, sweetheart?” he asked with a mischievous glint in his eye.

“Yes,” you responded.

“No problem. I can help with that, too,” he smirked as he got down on his knees, crawling under the table to kneel at your feet as your eyes went wide while you watched him. He pulled you to the edge of the chair before he slipped your panties off completely. “That essay better be ready to turn in by the time I get back up, do you understand?” he warned. You could feel his breath against your folds as he got closer.

“Yes, professor,” you mewled pathetically as you spread your thighs even wider for him.

Alternative kind of darkish ending:

You felt eyes on you as you turned around, but it wasn’t Bucky. You looked up to the second floor and could have sworn you saw Andy passing by, worry flooding through you instantly. You weren’t sure, though. Maybe he was really just walking by and hadn’t seen anything. Maybe it was no one at all and you were just imagining things. You almost didn’t even want to say anything about it, just act like you hadn’t seen, or thought you saw, anyone at all.

Until Andy came knocking on the bookcase, from the opposite direction, startling you as you gasped and spun around, hands flying to make sure your skirt was smoothed down completely, unconscious backing toward where Bucky was. Andy looked between you both for a second before he spoke, a knowing, devilish smirk growing on his face as he looked at you in a way you’d never seen him look at anyone before. Lewdly, leering, lustful, even.

“What’s goin’ on down here?”

You looked back at Bucky, hoping to find some kind of reassurance or protection, but he was completely unphased at the presence of his friend.

“You enjoy the show?” he asked, unamused.

“I think I could put on better,” he shrugged, eyes still locked on you, even as Bucky pulled you into his side.

“What do you think, sweetheart? Wanna let him try?”

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x curvy!reader #bucky x reader #bucky x curvy!reader #bucky barnes x plus size!reader #bucky x plus size!reader #professor!bucky #professor barnes #professor bucky x reader #professor barnes x reader #professor!bucky barnes #professor!bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes smut #bucky smut #andy barber x curvy!reader #soft!dark bucky x reader #andy barber

[cyberkitty1]

E42!Miles Morales x shy!reader

part 1

Ever since you guys had the project together it seemed like the both of you grew closer and closer together. Your parents know Rio and Aaron. You guys have had each other over for dinner so many times you cant even count it.

With each passing second you can feel yourself falling for him more and more. Though it seems like he’s been the same since you first met.

You were over at Miles place for dinner; your parents couldn’t make it due to work, but you didn’t mind. You sat in Miles room on his bed watching movies when he asked you a question that made your eyes go wide.

“You got a boyfriend?” He says leaning back on the palms of his hands with his legs straight out in front of him. “ No I don’t, do you have a girlfriend?” “ Nah”. This odd silence fell between the two of you, more awkward than usual. “Well, do you like anyone then?” you say turning your head towards him.

He shifts his weight onto his left hand while his right comes up to itch his neck. “ Well yea”. You feel your heart sink for a second; I mean why wouldn’t he like anyone? Your curiosity was rising “ Do I know who she is?”.

He stiffens before he could open his mouth Rio’s voice can be heard calling you guys down for dinner “ Kids come down food is ready!”. He gets up first leaving the room without a word you sigh following him.

After dinner you help wash dishes and clean off the table. When done you take yourself to Miles room; he was sitting on his bed phone in hand. He looks up at you putting his phone face down on the bed.

You look at the time 7:25 you don’t have to go home till 9:30. He speaks up “ so you wanna watch somethin’ ?” “Oh yea sure, you can choose”. The awkward silence was there again. He grabs the remote and puts something you’ve both already see on.

“You asked me somethin earlier” You thought for a second trying to remember what he’s talking about, but then a lightbulb goes off in your head. “ yea I did” He starts “ shes real nice, and pretty. Shes smart as hell too. We watch a ton of bad movies and laugh about how bad they are, you’d love her”. Feeling a bit defeated you sigh. “ Yea probably”.

In that moment Miles starts laughing “I know you can be an airhead sometimes but really?” He looks over at you and you look back confused. “ What are you talking about” “ Como estas tan despistada?”

“I’m talking about you”

You sit registering what he just said. “Huh” you weren’t thinking straight “ ME?” he nods “ who else do i watch trashy movies with just to rate them? What other girls do my mom let into the house with no questions asked? WHO else does my mom let come into my room AND lets me shut the door?” he says pointing to the door.

“Now i feel dumb” you say covering your face. He starts laughing at you.”Meaning you like me too” He doesn’t say it as a question he says it as a statement. “yeaaa” you say looking through your hands like this. 🫣

With that he sits next to you. “ yea i knew you did.” You look at him in disbelief “then why didnt you say anything??” “ Its funny watching you get flustered and stuff” he days nudging your shoulder.

You look over at him seeing his adorning brown eyes. “ So, what does that make us now?” you say quietly as if you were to say it any louder he would turn away and act as if this never happened.

“ Lets take it slow, ill take you on a date tomorrow, how does that sound Mi novia?” He reached for your hand intertwining it with your own “ sounds perfect”.

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taglist:

@rosesndan @shoyofroyoyoyo @p3rf3ct4ng3l

—————————————

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long time coming but its here my little pookie poos 🤭

Sorry for the wait, i was procrastinating and wanting it to be perfect all at the same time HAHA

#cyberkitty1 #earth 42 miles #earth 42 miles morales x reader #miles morales #miles morales x reader #atsv x reader #earth 42 #earth 42 miles morales #fluff #across the spiderverse #love him #so cute #i tried

[mazeinthemiroh]

If you feel comfortable can you do ateez being OBSESSED with reader's boobs

ateez being obsessed with their s/o's boobs

genre: fluff, suggestive ig?

warnings: not proofread, suggestive but not really - all boob talk in these headcanons are strictly fluffy and non-sexual. just some cute lil boob appreciation :D

a/n: yk what i don't usually do stuff like this but i WILL do this one because boobs need to be appreciated and loved :3

hongjoong

god, he loves them...

so he mainly uses them as pillows

will complain about the ache in his neck a lot because he's been tiring away and hunched over in the studio for hours bless 🤧🤧🤧

and he gives you shiny eyes

"you know what would really help me?"

you already know the answer

so you sigh in defeat as he happily snuggles his head on your chest and just lays there

and its endearing because he has never drifted off to sleep so fast before...

seonghwa

this is so funny because i have seen most to leasts of who is most likely to be a boob guy in ateez and seonghwa is ALWAYS< WITHOUT FAIL on top

like... is this canon??? where you guys getting this info from to collectively agree with each other??

anyways, the rumours are true. he loves 'em

just likes a soft they are

and how they look

and how they feel when he hugs you...

idk he just adores them, you get the idea

yunho

openly adores your boobs

he's a man who knows what he wants, yk?

"life's too short to not love boobs"

a new motto of his. charming.

likes it when you wear clothing that accentuates or complements your boobs

he admires them <33333

also he's tall so you gotta watch out for when he's trying to take a peak which is always

yeosang

will absolutely stare at them mindlessly or when he is bored

you know when some people just zone out

he tends to do that a lot. but why does he have to look at that specific area?? idk you tell me

he just thinks they're nice :)

gets a bit shy when you wear an outfit that shows cleavage

he's constantly trying to reprimand himself like "don't look it's not polite"

all i'm gonna say is that you can totally use his obsession to your advantage hehe

san

he's a very clingy boy

and yk what, idk about you but, i'm here for it

he is a cuddle bug and wants to cuddle into you 25/8

claims your boobs are simply the most comfortable things on the planet

and simply has to be in contact with them in some way whilst you guys snuggle up

he does like being on top of you and having his head on your chest. that's less of a boob-obsession thing and more of a comfort thing. he jsut likes being held and being close to you like that ;-;

idk he's a softie

mingi

i classify this guy as being the number 1 boob appreciator in ateez

there's just something about him

i can just TELL he lovesssss them

more than he should, probably

but we can cut him some slack cos he's cute :]

he tries to be subtle with his admiration for your boobs but he literally isn't fooling anyone

another tall guy to look out for because he can and will stare at your boobs

he can be so obvious sometimes it's actually embarrassing

wooyoung

every time he goes in for a hug, his head ends up on your chest as he hugs you

i have a friend who does that all the time like it's a real thing

it's kinda cute actually

and it's less to piss you off and more because he thinks they are comfy

will also use them as pillows

but likes it when he's the small spoon and he can feel them behind him

idk he's not picky when it comes to this so 🤷

jongho

he thinks he's so slick and prim and proper but the moment he catches a glimpse of your boobs it's over for him

he's surprisingly shy about his love for your boobs

like

he doesn't know what to do with himself

wants to touch them non-sexually but second guesses himself

'would you find it weird? am i going crazy?'

those are the types of things going through his mind

but he just stays a blushing mess while you're blissfully unaware of the effect you have on him

#ateez #atz #kpop #ateez headcanons #atz headcanons #kpop headcanons #ateez scenarios #ateez reactions #ateez imagines #atz reactions #atz scenarios #atz imagines #atz fluff #ateez fluff #kpop reactions #kpop scenarios #kpop imagines #kpop fluff #ateez x reader

[oneatlatime]

The Guru

Happy 2024 everyone and welcome to the first time I managed to type 2024 without first typing 2023! Oh and also a write up of The Guru. That too.

Me too Iroh. Me too.

So Zuko is riding high on that post-crisis 'time to get my life together' buzz that, similar to 3 am life plans, should absolutely not be listened to. Wonder how long before he crashes and burns? There's literally 2 episodes left, so I'm guessing one and a half?

Poor Sokka. My boy's got anxiety.

I don't know if it's a monk thing, an airbender thing, an Avatar thing, or an Aang thing, but I envy his complete lack of nerves.

How is Appa ok with them splitting up for a week after JUST getting them back?

I paused in a funny place. Have bonk-eyed Appa.

I love them comparing heights. What do you want to bet that that guy on the right was one of the youngest allowed to go fight, and Sokka made a big deal about how they're almost the same age and surely that means he can go too, right?

A lot of these Southern Water Tribe people have dreads or braids. That's neat.

Bato's arm is still messed up. That's some good continuity.

I've found the source of Katara's cheek bones. I guess Sokka takes after his mum.

Ok I know this is a really emotional moment (and it is! Sokka's spent two seasons earning this!) but my brain fixated on the furs and briefly thought they were sky bison pelts.

"It's been a difficult week for me." This guy thinks the Kyoshi Warriors are there to provide him therapy. Someone please just crown the bear instead.

He just gave away literally every relevant plot point AND outlined how to make sure all these plot points don't succeed. Crown. The. Bear.

Maybe if these generals spent less time playing with their giant model Earth Kingdom and more time general-ing, the war wouldn't suck so much?

Pretty.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE the designs, the colour palette, the music, the sound design of this air temple. I love everything about it. If I had the chance to live anywhere in the Avatar universe, it would be here. Even in its ruined state it's such a refreshing contrast to the claustrophobia of Ba Sing Se. I can feel the freshness of the breeze through the screen.

"A spiritual brother of your people" an adult perspective on a near extinct culture! What a resource!

"and a personal friend of Monk Gyatso" an old as balls perspective. He's got to be at least 130.

Anthropology cul de sac time: this guy is so valuable as a resource on the Air Nomads. There's probably parts of Air Nomad culture that Aang can't ever accurately talk about, because he was a kid when he left, and there was almost certainly stuff that the adults kept to themselves, or only shared with the older Air Nomads. This Guru doesn't seem to be an Air Nomad himself, but there's a good chance that there is knowledge that he has, that Aang doesn't. Aang should be nerding out more about this. I'll do the nerding out for him.

Aang just breezes right by that Gyatso name drop like it's nothing. Huh.

Oh hey Toph. I'd forgotten she was in a box. Tweedle dum and Tweedle dumber really are quite the pair. What's their plan for keeping her fed and watered? Actually, these guys apparently don't know that maps exist, so it's probably never occurred to them that humans need sustenance. They'll rock up to the Bei Fong estate with corpse Toph and wonder why they aren't getting the reward money.

Mai gets called out in-universe for shopping at Hot Topic.

Ty Lee's buttering up of Azula is getting less and less subtle as the season progresses. It's a testament to Azula's lack of awareness that she's hasn't noticed that, and that Ty Lee can get away with it.

Azula's right that it's an extraordinary opportunity. The King gave them quite literally every piece of info required to overthrow his kingdom in a 25 second conversation. I can't blame her for taking advantage of such an easy win.

That's a very effective unimpressed face. And a very impressive beard.

It's funny to see a spiritual concept from the real world pop up in a show that includes things like bending and giant fish possession. The mention of Chakras kind of sticks out. They couldn't invent a Avatar universe version?

"Once you begin this process, you cannot stop until all seven are open." Well that doesn't feel like foreshadowing at all.

This episode should be called "Aang's self-care Journey." It's about time the kid had a me day that wasn't avoidance-based.

Fear: Losing Katara - makes sense. Losing control of his powers via fish possession - makes sense. The Fire Lord - makes sense. But the Blue Spirit? He helped. Doesn't make sense.

Guilt: Running away - makes sense, although I thought he'd worked through that with Katara in the storm. Nuking that idiot General's base - makes sense, but boy did he quite literally ask for it.

This guru is saying some wonderfully accurate, and realistic, things. I love that he's not taking the Katara route of denying anything is wrong. He's going for the acknowledge, then heal route. And yes, it's unfair of me to compare the emotional maturity of Katara to a century+ old spiritual expert.

I'm going to ruin the immersion here and point out that Sokka's dad's voice actor voiced a bunch of characters in season 1. He's doing an excellent job, but couldn't they get a unique voice for a character that's so important (albeit offscreen) to Sokka?

That's an incredibly roundabout way of avoiding pointing out that the Southern Water Tribe are active participants in a bloody war. Sure, we can show multiple characters with visible scarring from horrific burns, but heaven forbid we imply that the Southern Water Tribe sinks ships. The parameters for what is and isn't appropriate on this show sometimes make no sense.

"Aren't you listening? I said the rest of you men get ready for battle." He hasn't seen his boy in two years, but fifteen minutes in his company and he knows exactly what needs to be said and how. That's some top tier parenting. Dad of the year. Dad of the century. Only decent Dad in this show that isn't technically an uncle.

"Follow your passion Zuko, and life will reward you." Great advice for your eight year old audience. Also a great way to end up unemployed.

Positive Sokka creeped me out a few episodes ago. Now positive Zuko is freaking me out too.

Pretty.

Back to Chakras! Shame: Burning Katara - makes sense. But that's it? To have the inner peace of mind of a twelve year old who's somehow only ever done one thing that he's ashamed of.

Is there anyone in the earth kingdom who isn't stupid? Once again wondering at the network's standards. Visible burn injuries are fine, but Mai can't say 'Shut up." It's got to be Shush up. Although I do seem to recall of brief time in the early 2000s when Shut Up was treated as a curse on par with Shit or Fuck. Maybe that was just at my school.

Chakras again! Even for a show that often has an A, B, and C plot, this narrative is ping ponging around a bit much.

Grief: nothing major, just a whole nation. Makes a horrific amount of sense. but I don't buy that he can get over grieving the whole world as he knew it by thinking about his crush. That's way too high a pedestal for Katara to be placed on.

Lies: Not accepting he's the Avatar. Interesting that not accepting that he's the Avatar and not accepting that he's a firebender are two different problems.

I see you reusing the opening credits footage. Your blue filters can't fool me.

PRETTY

Illusion: So we're relearning what we learned in The Swamp. Aang's probably the person currently alive least likely to believe in the rigid separation of the nations anyway. This doesn't feel like an illusion he's subject to?

The way this episode dances between its narrative threads is so great. It's all woven in so beautifully. And this makes perfect sense! Toph's spent her life secretly doing things excellently that everyone says are completely beyond her capabilities. Life has taught her that the statement "you are not able to" doesn't apply. Of course immutable laws of bending physics are treated with the same respect as an adult telling the champion of the Earth Rumble that she's can't earthbend beyond breathing exercises. If you told her that humans can't fly, she'd figure out how within the week.

Plot collision incoming.

Interesting that Katara initially recognises Zuko by his voice rather than his scar.

I'm pretty sure that Zuko and Iroh don't know about the whole brainwashing thing, but wouldn't it be hilarious if Zuko introduced himself to Katara as Joo Dee, and his uncle Joo Dee, welcome to the Jasmine Dragon, can I take your order? That would throw Katara into one hell of a moral quandary.

Katara being framed as the solution for Chakra number four comes back to bite Aang, as she's the problem in Chakra number seven. I knew that pedestal was too high.

I've changed my mind. This episode should actually be called "Half a dozen reasons why everyone should just learn to keep their goddamn mouths shut already."

So is anyone going to let Zuko and Iroh know that they're now in immediate danger and need to leave, like, yesterday?

I think the Guru is going for the whole 'if you love them, let them go, and they'll come back to you' thing. Don't cling, in other words. But for the sake of the plot he's suddenly lost his ability to explain Chakras in a way that makes them seem like the logical thing to do. The only clunky bit of this episode so far.

May I introduce you to our Lord and Saviour Toph?

"I am the greatest earthbender in the world." Yes. Yep. Yeah. That's now a quantifiable fact, and it's correct. Look on ye mighty and despair. She's even got Bumi beat.

Earth Tongue Running is a bit wonky looking but it covers a crazy amount of distance.

What's the range on Toph's earth sense? Can she sense what direction Ba Sing Se is?

I hope those two idiots' horse bird is ok.

"You don't know how much this means to me dad." He does. Very much so.

Every word out of this guy's mouth is precision engineered to make Sokka feel like a million bucks and I for one think it's about time someone built him up. Also, seeing this makes me realise how few good parents there are in this show. It's a trope of kids' adventure shows that the parents fundamentally can't be there, but I also think it's a commentary on yet another thing that this war has messed up.

Hey look! Being a man is knowing where you're needed the most, and right now that's in Ba Sing Se, protecting your sister! I love narratives that tie their themes up with a pretty bow on top.

This is Azula laying a trap, right? Which means that Katara squealed to someone about the exact location of Iroh and Zuko's tea shop. Don't like the implications of that.

Photos taken seconds before disaster.

Final Thoughts

This episode was a lot! I mean that in a good way! But I felt a bit like the Maxell Blown Away Guy, the way I kept getting assaulted by yet another plot thread. Don't get me wrong, this isn't a criticism. I think the switching between plot threads and the amount of info in this episode worked 99% of the time. But I'm kind of in awe at the balancing act the writers pulled off and I'm sort of sitting here blinking a bit trying to fit all this stuff in my head. I'm probably going to forget half the stuff I wanted to talk about in this write up, so here goes nothing.

Given the Azula reveal in at the end of last episode, I thought that this would be the episode where the shit hits the fan. I was wrong. I'm glad I was wrong. An episode of set up is required and is nice breathing room, even an episode as busy as this. And I got to leave Ba Sing Se! But this does mean that next episode is going to be calamity after calamity.

Aang and his Chakras: I'm fascinated by this guru. I hope he comes back. That brings the total number of people who were alive before the war started up to three: Aang, Bumi, Guru Patik.

I'm impressed that the run through of the Chakras rarely felt like an info dump. The onion and banana juice thing didn't work for me, but I'm sure it worked for people in the target age bracket. Kids love burp jokes.

So many shows sprinkle in tragic backstories for flavour and then never have them influence the character in the present. It was a nice contrast to see a show take a whole episode to tell Aang "yeah all that sucked. It's ok to feel down about it. Here's how you move forward."

Sokka and his dad: Love it. Love it so much. I love seeing Sokka built up, and he definitely deserves it, but I wonder if this is the reward for a character arc well done, or the set up for a character arc that's about to start? Is his dad's praise his prize for crossing the finish line, or is it so he's built up with farther to fall?

I loved seeing more of the Southern Water Tribe. I loved the fashion. There's a lot of variety in accessories and variations on a few basic elements like those knee guard things. I loved their hairstyles. I loved how cozy and communal that command tent felt. I loved their ships. I wonder how often these guys work out, that they can make loading ramps that are presumably deployed and stashed out of the way frequently, out of whole logs rather than planks. I have a bone to pick with the child-friendly sea mine. But it provides a good set up for a dad joke, so I'll let it slide.

Zuko and Iroh: Of course the one time Zuko is allowed to be in a good place, it's so that he and Iroh both have farther to fall when the inevitable happens. Poor guy just can't catch a break. I'd be mad at Azula for the party crashing that I'm assuming she'll do next episode, but it's been established that Zuko has all nice things taken away from him as soon as he gets them, and I can't blame Azula for being a tool of the universe.

Azula & Long Feng: Azula's acting in Long Feng's prison cell was miles ahead of what Long Feng was doing in front of the Earth King, so I'm wondering if Long Feng has bitten off more than he can chew. Also: conspiring with the enemy to bring down your own city just so you can reinstall yourself as the power behind the throne that will presumably cease to exist as soon as the Fire Nation takes control? That is both treasonous beyond description and an incredible case of shooting yourself in the foot. What's Long Feng's plan here?

Toph and the Dunderheads: it says something about the consistency of Toph's characterisation from her introduction onwards that she breaks the universe this episode and my reaction was "that's neat." It's obviously a huge moment, but of course Toph can do that. Toph can do anything. More importantly, Toph knows that Toph can do anything, so Toph routinely does do anything, especially things she shouldn't be able to do. If you had asked me a few episodes back which character would be most likely to fundamentally redefine bending, I would have said Toph, since she's already fundamentally redefined bending with her earth sense sonar vision.

Also Toph just breaks stuff. Things that come into contact with her cease to function as intended and instead function as Toph requires. Look at the two idiots: both successful business owners, one also a successful hoodwinker of the richest family around. But they come into contact with Toph and their brains take an extended vacation.

Katara & the Generals: this plot was more like an extension of Azula's plot than its own standalone thing. You can't blame her for spilling the news about Zuko and Iroh to someone she honestly thought was Suki. Not much else to say about it, although it's cute that she asks for a table for two at the tea shop. Momo gets a chair!

I like that there's a theme this episode of things going wrong despite the best intentions. No one's acting maliciously here apart from the Antagonists. The Earth King is having an honest chat with people he thought were friends. Sokka vouched for people he honestly thought were the Kyoshi Warriors. Katara shares information about a presumed threat with people she honestly thought were her allies. You can quibble with the wisdom of some of these decisions, but there were all done with good intentions. The best laid plans of mice and men oft go awry and all that. It brings to mind that Star Trek quote about how you can do everything right and still lose. And this set up is going to hit harder when whatever goes wrong next episode happens. And something will go wrong. A few months ago I figured that the Season 2 finale would be a triumph, but all signs are pointing towards a tragedy instead.

This episode was visually stunning, the soundtrack in the Air Temple sections especially was very evocative, and I applaud the minds that could juggle that many plot threads at once without dropping any. This one is definitely going on my rewatch list.

#atla #avatar: the last airbender #avatar the last airbender #the guru