are the tinies more comfy w being affectionate w each other (than their normal sized selves) or do they just simply not notice when they're cuddling?
a bit of both? the first time on the couch just kind of happened because they were tiny and tired I still need to finish the continuation/conclusion of that but there is like. negative chances of them not being aware they're cuddling in the same bed when one of them is not even where he's supposed to be.
I've already said I don't really care whether skk get romantic or not, but here we are all about the longing for each other's presence. The tinies feel the same things but more, so like everything else the denial is harder to deal with. Because of that, they skipped a few steps and now they do all of their usual stuff but also they cuddle.
Meanwhile the big guys are stuck in their 14+ layers of denial and pride, so the tinies doing their thing in front of them is both chipping at those layers and so embarrassing, I don't think they see how the other one is acting as much as their own little guy is betraying them will you stop that what will they think???
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very heavy on locker rooms as liminal spaces! i grew up as a dancer with a hockey-playing brother in midwestern usa, and it's bizarre how much our experiences were paralleled. we'd vent a lot to each other about the various pressures of our sports, and even though i didn't have the words for it at the time i look back now and can see that both of us were locked in these insulated, self-policing, gender-essentialist and hyper-conformist environments that reallllyyy distilled themselves in locker rooms/dressing rooms - places where we both spent a ton of unsupervised time establishing our own in-group hierarchies and in-jokes and bonds. it's why i'm kind of baffled by some depictions of the locker room in hrpf as the convening of the big happy team family and nothing more- because yeah, that can be what it looks like on the absolute surface level, but there are so many weird and often fucked up undercurrents that create a constant baseline tension that everybody is at least subconsciously aware of and reacting to at all times. especially when some kind of event, usually an intrusion from Outsiders Who Just Don't Get It And Never Will or some infraction committed by a team member against unspoken but gospel rules- really cannot emphasize the self-surveilling and self-policing enough- triggers an uptick in the tension. and i want to see that tension informing everything those little guys do in MY hrpf. i want the tension to be palpable in the narrative! additionally! it is extra extra interesting to me that it's very possible to be a person immersed in such a culture who can recognize that other similar cultures are extraordinarily fucked up and even that elements of one's own culture are fucked up but remain fundamentally and fanatically attached to the idea that changing one's own culture would harm its success in some way, which is more unforgivable than literally any other sin. i cannot stress enough how badly i want more hrpf through that specific lens. i am so sorry this got so long lmao but would LOVE! to hear your thoughts on this i am obsessed with all of your meta and could read your hrpf perspectives all day
yessss yes yes! i love this message so much, you get it, damn. i went to a professional ballet academy and this is so real. i definitely didn't realize it at the time but the way dressing rooms have both been a refuge for me and the most terrifying place to walk into is so interesting. even just the process of taking off your own clothes to all put the same shit on... walk in an individual, walk out part of the team, oof.
i think locker rooms are so difficult to get a grip on writing-wise so i definitely don't blame anyone for not going there in fic, lmao. i know i always try to avoid locker rooms in my fic, especially on an nhl level. it's hard to find real, solid resources/texts on the hockey locker room and the shit that happens in there, but i fucking love when people do go there in fic and really just... put in text how a locker room is its own little microcosm where the rules are different and the real world isn't allowed. like, you just know the performing and the posturing and the weird mindgames going on there are crazyyyyy! and honesty about that sacred space seems, for so many guys, to veer into betrayal so fast (interesting in and of itself, i think) and i think the fact that it is this kind... of we don't talk about fight club thing... even just the politics of who you're sitting next to... i was watching this tour of a hockey locker room and someone asked a player like, 'do you think you're sitting next to vets on the team was a deliberate choice from the org?' and he was just baffled by even the idea. had never even thought about it even though it was so obvious that that was exactly what was going on, lmao. but then you also hear players say like, 'no i need to sit next to this guy or i'm going to blow up this whole building' so there is some wherewithal...
i think it's also so interesting how like, showers are this holy thing. so many players without any kind of like, self-reflection saying like, if you don't shower with the boys, that's it, it's over. you have to shower with the boys or you miss everything. it's guy time. it's important. it's bonding. i was reading someone's dissertation on lgbt acceptance in junior hockey and the thing all these guys kept coming back to was like, well, i would probably feel uncomfortable with a gay teammate being in the showers with us but i would be even more uncomfortable if he couldn't shower with us, it's soooo like. even the politics about like, who has the aux cord, lmaooooo. i was reading this article on locker room politics and there was this whole thing about certain players not bobbing their heads to the music and how that became a whole thing. just incredible stuff, hahahaha.
i think you're also so right about how some dudes, looking back, can see that fucked up shit went on there, lmao. and still are so set on like no but we shouldn't change anything about it. was it auston m who said that (junior) hockey is like a cult? bc......... you can get in. but you can't get out. not even when you're sixty and no longer care that your hockey coach/father stand in isn't proud enough of you. you're still trapped.
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Birthday Wishes - Touya Todoroki
“Stop moving around so damn much,” I growled at him, trying to carefully rinse his sudsy hair clean, “you’re going to make me get soap in your stupid, pretty eyes!”
“The water is too damn hot, woman,” he complained, his head leaned back over the tub edge, his bright turquoise eyes meeting mine so that I could watch his dramatic eye roll.
“Too hot for you?” I questioned, quirking an eyebrow at that notion, but pushing the dial towards the cooler side.
“Just cause I’m hotter than everyone else doesn’t mean I need to use scalding hot water. The cooler water helps ease the pain my quirk leaves behind,” he hummed as I ran my hand in the back of his hair, watching him exhale in comfort.
“You never told me that before,” I sighed, feeling awful. “You shower with me all the time and you’ve never complained about how hot I make the water. Why not?”
He smirked, keeping his eyes closed, “I think you know why.”
“Freaking pervert,” I quietly commented, chuckling to myself.
He laughed, making my heart skip many beats as he turned his head, catching my wrist between his teeth lightly.
“Only where you’re involved, sweetheart. Besides,” and he opened one eye to look my way again, “no scaldin’ hot water is going to keep me away from you and that beautiful fuckin’ body.”
“Well thanks, sweet cheeks. But come on now,” and I turned the water off grabbing for the nearby towel, “you got a whole gang of people downstairs waiting to celebrate your birthday.”
“Whose idea was this again?” Touya grumbled as I messily dried his hair.
“You know Shoto hasn’t gotten to celebrate you in a really long time, let alone celebrate you getting out from under All for One’s control. You should have really seen this coming.” I laughed, pulling the towel away and watching Touya’s bright white hair sparkle as the light hit it.
“Do I gotta go down there?” he whined, grabbing my hips and forcing me down on his lap.
I wrapped my arms around his neck, the towel hanging in my hands, and kissed his nose.
“If you do, I’ll be sure to reward you heavily,” I smirked, kissing his forehead.
“Oh, no shit?” he asked, excitement laced so obviously in his tone.
“Yep, whatever you wanna do. Just like last year. Just…,” and I pulled away to look into his aqua eyes, “just please behave and remember that everyone is still a little worrisome about you. But Shoto and I love you immensely.”
“I could give two shits if Shoto loves me, doll,” he laughed, making me roll my eyes.
“Well I love the shit out of you. So just behave... for me?”
“Will do.” He smiled the biggest grin, showing off his bright, sharp canines. The very same smile that always made my heart hammer so violently in my chest due to how happy and childlike it felt to see on his face.
“Good,” and I kissed him and pulled myself off his lap, “now let’s go change!”
“Yes, ma’am,” and he grabbed my hand in his, pulling me to our room to do as promised.
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