#YES I NOW HAVE THREE JAVI SERIES

[notjustjavierpena]

Longing

Series Masterpost | Main Masterpost

A/N: This is a collection of !!!!5!!!! asks because y’all are desperate for Javier being a great husband and lover, and I am happy to give you what you crave.

Summary: You make love to your husband the first time after giving birth.

Pairing: Javier Peña x Reader/You (No y/n)

Tags: +18 smut, husband!javier, domestic life, breastfeeding, f masturbation, showering together, insecurity and nervousness, longing kisses and lots of them, body worship, breast play, lactation kink, javier is HUNGRY, nipple play orgasm, checking in, multiple orgasms, dirty talk, praise kink, fingering, clit stim, unprotected piv sex, emotional and desperate sex, creampie, crying and aftercare, sweet javi is here to make you comfortable and make you come 

Word count: 5.3k

Link to this work on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/53944708

Longing

Javier gets up early every day for work during your maternity leave and the routine is the same; coffee, breakfast, and a shower, and then he gets Lucas out of his bassinet so he can feel his son’s tiny body against his naked chest before he finally brings him to you because he knows you love bed-sharing with your newborn. It’s so you don’t miss me, he jokes each time after kissing your forehead, knowing that his son might as well be his clone, at least not too much.

You’re nursing Lucas as Javier gets dressed. Today will be the first break in your newfound routine, and you barely know how to begin. Something is playing on your mind and you distract yourself by running three fingers over Lucas’ head as he feeds, hoping it’ll make the words you’re about to say seem less clumsy.

“Javi,” you try to get your husband’s attention.

“Sí, mi amor (yes, my love)?” Javier is standing in front of the mirror, tying his tie. He looks at you through the mirror and smiles gently as he catches Lucas’ tiny hands reaching for your chest. You let the infant grab at your finger instead, warmth in your grin as you bond with him.

“I was thinking we could do something tonight,” you begin and your voice sounds almost absentminded. It feels silly to ask for sex when you think back to how ravenous both of you were before and during the pregnancy. Lucas is nearly two months old. You haven’t been intimate with each other for two months. 

“Do what?” Javier goes back to tying a knot on his ridiculously patterned tie. 

“You know…”

He tenses up, almost looking like when a cat’s ears perk up in interest.

“Is tonight the night?” He asks, catching on. He turns away from the mirror to face you, expectant but careful not to assume. 

“Two months,” you say simply, “I think I’m ready.”

“Two whole months. How the fuck did we manage that?” He snorts. You tut at his foul language but cannot help but smile since you know he is right. It boggles your mind too. 

“We’ll have to take it slow. Would that be okay?” You look down at Lucas as he gurgles slightly, moving him a bit in your arms. 

Javier finishes dressing for the day. He walks across the room and bends down over you, kissing your forehead, “Is it okay that I get to take care of my beautiful wife? I think I’ll suffer through it for you.”

When you tilt your head backward, he also kisses your mouth. You smile against his lips. You say, “I think you’re late for work.”

“And maybe I’ll go home early too,” he pecks your lips repeatedly, “Rush home and into the bedroom.”

“We’ll be waiting here for you,” you let him know. 

Javier runs a finger down over Lucas’ nose, “Your momma better change the batteries in the baby monitor, mijo (my son). We won’t have time to check on you as often.”

“Oh, just go,” you grin.

“Te quiero (I love you).”

“I love you too, now go catch some bad guys.”

Javier gives you one last kiss before he heads out the door, and it’s enough to leave you aching for another. He lingers until your breath is torn from your lungs, slips his tongue inside your mouth until you are reminded of what he can do with it, and his fingers slide through the hair at the back of your head - all he has to do is yank but he doesn’t, not with his baby in your arms.

“More later,” he whispers and your pulse goes south at the promise. 

“O-okay,” you only manage to stutter.

—

When Lucas has been put to sleep, Javier and you take a warm bath together to get you all relaxed. He helps you under the spray, guiding you into the cubicle by the hand, and smiles as you sigh deeply at the warm water. 

“You’re fucking gorgeous,” he praises when you run your fingers through your hair as it wets. You give him a shy grin. He proceeds to kiss your neck, not caring about water running down over his face when his lips on your body make you less tense with nerves. 

You tilt your head back, letting out a sigh as he drinks in your skin, going upwards until it is your mouth he captures. His hands dig into your fuller hips, fingers denting what you call your baby weight and what he tells you he’d fall on his knees for.

“Can I touch you?” He asks when he needs air. 

“I’m nervous,” you answer truthfully. 

Carefully, as if seeking permission, he takes your hand in his own. He kisses your palm softly and you feel a spark of electricity in your belly, knowing that you are lucky that it is him who is here to guide you through this. He moves your hand down between your legs, “Perhaps… these gentle hands.” 

“You want me to touch myself?” You blink.

“Who would be better?” He grins boyishly. 

A part of you wants to say that you think he might know you better than you know yourself but there’s a plan here. You follow through, never breaking eye contact as you find your clit and start going in circular motions. It takes a second but when your body finally reacts, you let out a gasp at the flutter that spreads out from the little nub. 

Javier looks ravenous at having the privilege to witness you like this. He talks quietly over the sound of the water, and soon you feel his cock poke into your thigh, “That’s it, mi amor (my love). God, look at you. Doing so good.” 

“Javi,” you sigh gently. Your fingers speed up, feeling your heartbeat slowly increasing in speed. You chase your high, mouth slightly open and eyes locked on Javier’s.

“Yeah? You’re gonna make yourself come?” Javier’s hands find your hips again. He holds them in place, joins in the way that he can. You nod with a higher-pitched yeah, eyes falling closed during a louder moan.

Your fingers are more frantic after that. You touch yourself with him looming over you, core burning with need as you can feel his eyes bore into you. Your clit jumps occasionally as you work yourself toward the edge and a crease in your forehead forms. 

“I’m gonna— fuck,” you announce. The sound of water cascading down your body blurs until it becomes almost silent to your ears.

“Yes, you are,” his voice has dropped an octave, “Oh, you really are, aren’t you?”

And then you snap and the fact that it isn’t in privacy and that you have Javier swearing under his breath makes it feel incredible. You can feel your cunt clench from clit to slit repeatedly, seeking more than you can give at the moment but oh, it feels so good. You don’t think you’ve ever wanted your husband inside of you more, walls aching to be stretched.

Time stands still in the shower. You find yourself resting against the cold, tiled wall. Javier looks at you, has pushed his wet hair out of his face, and is smiling triumphantly, “Mi esposa hermosa (my gorgeous wife).”

You roll your eyes, cheeks heating up from both post-orgasmic bliss and sudden shyness, “It felt good. I don’t think you know how wet I am for you.”

“Well you are in the shower,” he jokes when he spots your restraint, hoping to get you to relax even further, and you step forward to punch him playfully. He shies away, laughing to the point where your head swims with love and tenderness for him. 

It ends up being an occasion to kiss once more. Javier holds your face, thumb smoothing over your chin as he slides his mouth over yours. You melt into him, holding onto both of his wrists as you suck on his tongue and it doesn’t bother you that you accidentally swallow a few droplets of water; his lips on yours make everything else fade. 

He has rarely kissed and touched you like this over the past few months, having agreed with himself to not tempt you too much with something that neither of you would have been able to follow through on, so the promise behind his touch - his hands are going down to your hips and your arms are linking together around his neck - makes you shiver as goosebumps rise on your skin underneath the hot spray of water. 

Eventually, you realize how hard he is and you almost feel bad for being so selfish but when you reach down, Javier stops you. 

“I can wait,” he promises, breaking the kiss to look down between your bodies. He twitches in your hand, even more when you reluctantly let go. 

“Javi,” you whine.

“I don’t want it to be over already,” he explains with color on his cheeks, “Think about how much we’ll enjoy it later. I’m sorry, mi amor (my love).”

“No, I understand,” you reply with a soft sigh, “I’ll make it up to you later.”

“Mhm, bet you will,” he hums and then drags you close to kiss you again.

You agree on finishing the shower and getting into your sleep clothes because Javier argues that it might help with your nerves to be undressed by him, a thing you absolutely love. You settle for a loose t-shirt - in case you have to nurse - and panties, something comfortable with an ability to leave the covered parts of your body up to the imagination.

Earlier, before checking on Lucas, you took painkillers to let your muscles relax even further. Now that they are working, you meet him in bed. He smiles at you as he sees you enter through the door and watches you come closer as he is sitting with one leg dangling from the side of your shared bed.

“Hey,” you say shyly.

“Come here,” he smiles.

You may have relaxed muscles but your heartbeat races in your chest, feeling like you might have butterflies trapped behind your ribs. Your body is humming as you crawl onto the bed, sitting on your knees in front of him. 

“You still want to do this?” He asks, taking one of your wrists in his hands. He rubs it with his thumb, giving you his usual concerned expression that could compete with that of a puppy. 

“Yes,” you confirm, leaning forward to initiate a kiss. 

He catches on quickly and meets you halfway. He tastes like toothpaste, kissing you softly at first before he grows hungry from having denied himself during the first touches in the shower. 

You sling your arms around him, just about to be bold enough to straddle him but he is quicker, and suddenly flips you around until your back hits the mattress and makes you bounce slightly. You respond with a half-yelp, half-giggle, and try to ignore any anxiety that might arise. 

However, any noise quickly dies in your throat because Javier moves on top of you. He moves close until you can get drunk on his scent, inhale the distinct smell of only him that gets you so high because you know it’s only you who gets to be so close to it. You can feel your heartbeat in your sex, your underwear starting to dampen. 

“You know I struggle to be gentle,” he rasps against your ear, placing a lingering kiss right below it to make your heartbeat spike. His hands curl around the bottom of your t-shirt. He pulls back to look at what he is doing to you and for a moment, you think he might rip the fabric apart from the way his nails dig into it, the same urgency in his eyes like someone who has gone without food and drink for weeks and is now looking at a whole buffet, “When it’s been so long since I have had you like this.”

You hum in understanding, mouth slightly open and squeezing your legs together with a sigh, causing Javier to look down between your legs. He looks like someone who is making a plan, a list of steps forward about what he wants to do to you. You can only wait in anticipation.

Your top comes off then. He yanks it upwards and you lift your arms above your head to help him rid you of it completely. Your tits bounce slightly as there is nothing to hold them anymore, and Javier groans at the sight of you. He practically latches onto your neck, sucking his way down your throat until he has made a trail of glistening spit down over your shoulder, your collarbone, and finally down between your breasts. It’s nice but it’s a lot.

“Stop,” you say to him as he seems lost in the moment. You rest your hands on the back of his neck, threading your fingers through the soft curls there. He lifts his head to look at you, and you smile gently. Your face feels hot, “I need you to go slow… Sorry, I’m not ruining it, am I? I just told you to stop…”

“What? No. No, mi amor (my love),” he reassures but even if his kisses have made you wet, you feel overwhelmed with the idea that things might not be the same ever again. You shift slightly underneath him, and he presses a soft kiss to your collarbone whilst watching your expression in case it’s still uncomfortable for you. 

“I think it might take a while for me to be ready tonight, I can’t just jump back in,” you swallow after confessing it but Javier nods in understanding. 

“That’s okay, baby. It’s only been two months,” he crawls up to hover over you, abandoning whatever he was doing even if he was enjoying it, and you still rest your hands on the back of his neck. 

“I mean you’re so,” you decide to feed his ego to make your reluctance up to him even if it’s not necessary, “… Big.”

Javier snorts. He seems to find it more funny than flattering, “Yeah?”

“Oh yeah,” you giggle, “Biggest thing I’ve ever seen.”

“Listen,” he turns serious, resting on one of his forearms to reach for your hand on the back of his head. He pulls it down so he can hold your hand in his. He entwines your fingers, “Do you want to stop? I won’t get angry at you.”

“And not even try?” You avoid his gaze.

“Hey, mírame (look at me),” he replies and you do, “If that’s what you want. No matter what you say, we made progress tonight.”

“I masturbated in the shower,” you deadpan. 

Javier laughs but he kisses your lips a few times, “And it was fucking sexy. I’ll be satisfied with just watching that for the rest of my life if I had to, but I do like the thought of Lucas not being an only child.”

“Slow down, Peña,” you teasingly scold him, feeling your anxiety fade as he makes you laugh and thus relax, “You just got your first baby. I am not a factory.”

“What are you then?” He wiggles his brows.

“Your wife,” you say with a grin. 

“Oh, right, that’s right,” he moves to kiss your neck again and you find that you let him. He moves slower than before, trailing his lips across your throat from one shoulder to the other. He takes his time and doesn’t rush the way that he probably would like to, “That’s right, you’re my wife.” 

“Husband,” you moan softly and feel him smile against your skin. He goes further down and goosebumps rise on your skin when the flat of his tongue licks around one of your nipples. You push your chest out, needing more because it starts a fire in your belly. To think that he hadn’t even gotten this far just moments ago. 

“You like that?” He asks, pressing a kiss to the side of your right breast. He looks up at you through his lashes before he licks the little nub again, it has hardened into a peak. The nerves are so sensitive there now that you are breastfeeding, and you hadn’t even given it a second thought that it could be something to enjoy with him. 

“Yeah,” you sigh and stare down at the top of his head. He moves to bend your legs, spreading them apart so he can lie down between them and kiss your tits. 

“I can’t wait to see how wet this’ll get you, baby,” he murmurs as he concentrates. He starts with the right side, letting his mouth fall open until he can press a hot, open-mouthed kiss to your nipple and suck just a little as he pulls back. He does it again. You curl your toes and whine. 

“Oh,” you are panting already from the connection it appears to have with your cunt, “Keep going.”

Javier doesn’t hesitate. He skims his hand up and down your side until he dares cup your breast, looking up at you for confirmation that you aren’t uncomfortable. You bite your lip and nod. 

Your husband applies the gentlest amount of pressure. He doesn’t remove his hand again, keeping your breast in his palm as he takes your nipple between his lips once more. However, this time he sucks without pulling away, and much to your surprise, as he massages you too, you feel a few drops of milk slip into his mouth. 

“Javi!” You say in a horrified voice, starting to squirm, “I’m so sorry. Oh my God, ohmygodohmygodohmy—“

But Javier only seems to be spurred on by this. In fact, he starts to coax out more milk to satisfy the hunger that he didn’t even know he had in him. You hear him mumbling something, telling you not to worry about it. He sucks, laps, and catches each drop that escapes his mouth and streaks your beautiful chest whilst your eyes roll back and your clit throbs. 

Your hands find his hair. You tug without making him pull away from you, and pressure builds as his skilled tongue moves in circles around your now-puffy nipple. He takes the peak between his lips again and again, the sound of wet kisses towards skin filling the room, and he drinks like he is parched. 

Eventually, you feel too tender to go on and something inside of you fears that you might actually come from this even if it seems ridiculous to be terrified of that happening. You don’t think you have ever had breasts this sensitive in your life, and whilst it has been nice for you to have Javier pay attention to your chest, this is new territory and it’s overwhelming above all else. 

The grip you have on his hair intensifies, “Baby. Can you switch? I’m getting sore.”

“Of course,” he draws back slowly and gently noses along your spit-slicked nipple and presses one last soft kiss. You twitch underneath the touch. 

“Javi,” you stress. 

But he follows through and switches over to the left. The sensation of him using his tongue on you here as well is exquisite, eliciting a string of higher and higher moans from your throat. 

God, he knows what he is doing with his mouth and soon wetness has started to smear your inner thighs after seeping through your underwear. You know Javier will lose his mind when he sees it.

Though right now, he is busy as his tongue flicks repeatedly across the hardened nub. Milk trails down your stomach at first and then suddenly squirts when he pinches your right nipple without warning. 

“Oh!” You gasp and feel your pulse getting stronger between your legs. You lift your head, “Jesus. This is—“

“The hottest fucking thing I’ve ever seen,” he interrupts you as if he knows you are going to degrade yourself in some way. You were in fact going to call it messy. He kisses your breast open-mouthed again, sucking your nipple into his mouth until you give in to a moan, “¡Dios mío (my God)! You taste like candy. Sweetest fuckin’ thing ever.”

“You need to—“ you can barely speak as his tongue curls around your hardened peak. He flicks his tongue back and forth over it afterward.

“Yes?” He stops to let you talk and nibbles right at the roundness of your breast. 

“I can’t do this anymore, we gotta do something else or I’ll come,” you don’t even hear how absurd it is to make it sound like a problem. Below you, Javier nearly chokes at hearing that.

“Jesus, how devastating that would be,” he says sarcastically. With a quick glance up at you, he decides to keep going to which you do not protest. He lavishes you with nips and sucks, building something low in your belly, “Then come, mi vida (my life).”

You try to catch your breath as your cunt pulses but suddenly an orgasm crashes over you and makes you lose it altogether. There’s milk everywhere. You cry for him after a moment of not being able to make a sound, hands falling to the sides so you don’t end up pulling strands of hair from his scalp. Your back arches, your throat scratches from the noise you make, and below you, Javier watches with absolute wonder.

“Are you okay?” He eventually asks, sitting up a little to follow your wishes if you should have any. When you don’t respond, too busy panting, he starts rubbing your thighs soothingly until you come back to him. 

“That’s never happened before,” you say, “I didn’t think…”

“Was it good?” He watches you with a tiny smirk.

You nod.

“Do you want more?” He continues. 

You don’t hesitate despite the circumstances. Twenty minutes ago, you would have doubted even being kissed. You nod.

“And what does my baby want?” He looks down between your legs. When you don’t reply, he starts suggesting things, “Want me to play with your perfect pussy? We can stop anytime you want.”

You whimper instead of using actual words. It’s now that you realize the pressure inside of you telling you how much you need to feel him inside of you, and you’ll take it any way you can. Perhaps it’ll be easier to start out this way. 

“Yeah?” He sounds almost a bit mocking, moving to stand on his knees between your spread legs, “That what my girl wants?”

“Yeah,” you reply breathlessly.

Javier swears quietly as he hooks his fingers into the waistband of your panties, pulling them down and watching the fabric cling to your wet seam. He inhales deeply as if to compose and behave himself, looking starved for more even as he already has a streak of white milk on his chin, “You are so goddamn wet for me, baby. She’s weeping, the poor thing.”

“Imagine how many men would worship the shape of your body,” he praises as soon as he has you naked below him, eyes glazed over by lust. He looks at you as if it’s the first time he has ever seen you, pupils dilated and mouth slightly open. You feel like a deer in the headlights of a car but you don’t dare interrupt him, don’t dare disturb the flow of words falling from his lips because they make your whole body burn with need instead of insecurity.

“I can’t believe that I was the one who got to make you my wife,” he tells you with a smile that shows you how pleased he is with himself as if it’s his greatest achievement - fuck everything else; the job, the money, the fame. He skims a hand over your belly before leaning down to kiss below your belly button, causing your muscles to jump underneath his warm mouth when he licks you clean of milk. Then his palm descends on your body, “Mhm, gonna show you how grateful I am. Stuff you full of my fingers.”

“Please,” you whine, jaw clenching as he slips a finger inside of you and tiny shivers seem unable to stop rolling over you. He straightens again to look at you for reassurance that everything is okay. You give him no reason to doubt.

After a few moments, he adds a second finger. He curls them upwards until he finds the little spot inside of you that makes you sing, and your hands grab at the sheets when he makes a come-hither motion over and over again.

“Javi,” you breathe desperately. 

“Yes?” He doesn’t halt, only slows down slightly to concentrate on what you are going to ask of him. The look in his eye tells you that he’ll give you anything. 

“I love you,” you moan towards the ceiling instead. The wet squelches of your cunt are obscene to listen to, bouncing off the walls along with your continuous gasping for air as he makes you unable to breathe properly. 

“I know, baby, I know. I love you too,” he grinds the heel of his hand down against your mound, reminding you briefly of how he made love to you the first time ever. He rubs your clit on the outside and works the pads of his fingers over your g-spot on the inside. Fast. The world fades away around you until you suddenly find yourself coming again, Javier’s eyes widening at how quickly you have gotten there once more, “Christ, baby. You are just insatiable tonight. Has it been too long?”

“I want you,” you completely ignore the question. You shake through your high, not even planning on begging but it’s almost too much not to have him fuck you, “I can— ah, I can take your cock. I can. Please. I need you inside of me.” 

Javier growls. He shoves his underwear down, moving on the bed for a moment until he is completely naked. You reach for him with newfound confidence, and he enters your embrace and slides both arms underneath you to hug you back. The kiss he gives you is so longing that you almost want to cry from all the emotion it exudes. He loves you so much. He would never do anything to hurt you. It is so clear at that moment. 

“Make love to me,” you moan into his mouth, thumbs drawing down the sides of his face until you can move your hands to the nape of his neck. He is warm against your chest, the curls at the back of his neck slightly damp from sharing your body heat for so long.

It takes a mere few seconds for him to reach down between your bodies. You make a little gasp as he pushes into you. He is slow in his movements, almost making it seem like he isn’t moving his hips forward at all, and he keeps his eyes on yours to make sure your face’s contortion isn’t because of pain. 

You grab at the pillowcase, clutching it into your grip as he fills you up. Your breathing is loud and hard, your eyes a little wider than usual. There’s a little resistance but you try to relax into it, accept his cock even if it’s with trembles of your body.

“This okay?” He asks with a voice that is marked by his own restraint. 

You nod repeatedly. You want to punch the bed. Instead, you reach to grab his bicep and hold on for dear life as he gets deep inside of you. You aren’t sure if you have overdone it by coming two times already because you are so sensitive, your walls fluttering around his length but oh, you want him so badly that you take it with your eyes rolling back into your skull.

After a few very long moments, he is fully inside of you. His chest rises and falls quickly, breathing strained because of how much he has missed being engulfed by your heat. You hold onto his arms which flex underneath your touch, and then he moves inside of you for the first time in two months. 

The cry that releases from your throat makes your voice break and Javier’s groan follows right after. You become a sweaty mess of limbs, clutching at each other as if you can’t get close enough. You pant his name, kiss him deeply, and dig your fingers into his skin hard enough to bruise.

“I’ve missed you,” you tell him through whimpers.

“You’re perfect, mi amor (my love),” he replies in a gruff voice, “I love to fuck you.”

Javier cannot help his mouth when you make him feel like this. He thrusts harder into you, moving his weight to his forearm so he can slide his free hand under you to press it against the small of your back. He lifts your pelvis into his own, arching you until no one would be able to tell where he starts and you finish. 

Then he speeds up his hips and you see stars. You throw both arms around him, holding onto your wrist to keep them there. He drives into you with determination to make you scream, and as you do, you try to imagine how beautiful his golden back is glistening with sweat. 

“Fucking love making you come,” he continues, planting a kiss on your jaw that was probably supposed to be on your mouth, “Over and over and over. Are you gonna come for me?”

“Yes, yes, God, yes, baby,” you can feel his pubic bone grinding into your clit, building your peak quickly, “Keep going— don’t, oh my God, don’t stop!”

“Wouldn’t dream— fuck, I wouldn’t dream of it, my love,” he sounds close to, giving you everything he has to make you tip over the edge a third time. He always tells you how much he loves you choking his cock until he spills inside of you.

So when you come, a hitched breath turning into a series of cries for God, he does too. It is two months of built-up tension and emotions, and you find yourself crying in his arms as waves of pleasure take hold of you and take you with them. You are gone, lost to the world of burning desire and ecstasy. 

After he pulls out of you, the sense of time is an unknown concept in the silence that follows. You cry quietly because nothing else can convey what you feel. After all, you feel so close to him again. Javier brushes each tear away with his thumb, murmuring soft and comforting words. 

“You did so good,” are the first words that actually make sense to you. He noses along your shoulder to kiss you there, “I don’t deserve you. You are the most beautiful woman in this world.”

You chuckle breathlessly but fresh tears just fall down your cheeks. Javier rolls off of you to make things less intense, looking at you from where he is lying on his side, “Don’t cry. There’s nothing to cry about. You were so beautiful.” 

“Sorry,” you say instantly and wipe tears away with the back of your hands. 

“No,” he objects, “That’s not what I meant.”

He is silent for a moment. Then he lays his palm on your stomach, “What do you need?”

“To pee and get cleaned up,” you feel embarrassed without knowing why, “My legs feel like jelly.”

“Fuck it, let’s see if mine do too,” he is on his feet before you can protest, telling you to scoot closer and when you do, he picks you up bridal style. 

He carries you to the bathroom, making a comment about your wedding night, and then lets you pee and wipes you down with a damp cloth afterward, both your sensitive cunt and breasts. You kiss him more times than you can count when he takes you back to bed again. 

In the morning, you watch him bounce Lucas in his arms when he thinks you are asleep. He is making funny faces and blowing raspberries on your son’s chubby cheeks, talking so gently that you can’t help but simply roll onto your other side, smile gently to yourself, and fall back into slumber.

.

.

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[undercoverpena]

late night texts - prologue

welcome to the snippet/tease i've been taunting you all week with...

javier peña x f!reader summary: It's the year 2000. Javi is minding his own business on the porch of his pop's ranch when a text from an unknown number vibrates his phone. The only problem is, no one knows he has a phone and no one has his number.

an: as promised, meet my latest brainchild series. updated on tuesdays (text tuesdays) this is a text based fic with occasional thoughts thrown in. i am trying to be as factual as possible in terms of technology, but this is also fiction so, just... let it be. prologue warnings: fluff. flirting. series warnings: fluff. banter. hilarity. phone sex, actual smut. falling in love. romcom vibes. bold is you/reader | italics is javi p

You: Help. Me. I have that stupid date in an hour, I’ve ransacked my entire wardrobe and nothing. I’m unsure if I should wear slutty underwear or sensible, because the last date I went on was when I was twenty fucking four and now I’m thirty fucking five and things have changed. What am I even doing? 

Javi: you’re going on a date 

You: Well yes. But I mean, in my life. I should just get a cat or a plant. Raise that. Fuck men off. Become self-sufficient. Saves the embarrassment of talking about mindless shit. 

Javi: how can I help? 

You: Tell me what to wear. The new dress? The old faithful black one? Am I going slutty or sensible? Is it lipstick or gloss—it’s the year 2000, and I don’t even know if I know any music that’s in the charts. 

Javi: new dress, sensible. unless you’re feeling like you wanna put out and lipstick 

You: You’re being especially calm about this for saying you wanted me to “get off my couch and stop moping.

Javi: that’s because you have the wrong number 

You: You’re not Aish? 

Javi: not even a little bit 

You: And you couldn’t tell me this three texts ago when I was asking what underwear I should wear for my date.

Javi: and miss out on helping a lady in need?

You: Delete my number. 

Javi: if you delete mine first

an: i hope the teasing was worth it, see you tuesday

Late Night Texts Masterlist

#javier peña x reader #javier peña #javier peña narcos #javi peña x reader #javi peña x you #javi pena #javier peña x you #narcos x reader #javier pena x reader #javier pena x you #javi pena x reader #narcos javier x reader #narcos javier #pedro pascal x reader #narcos fanfiction #javier pena narcos #javier peña smut #javi peña smut #javier peña x reader smut #pedrostories

[wheresarizona]

Learning to Live Part 21

pairing: Javier Peña/f!reader (reader is a nurse with no physical descriptions)

summary: Javier finally gets to do something he’s been dreaming about (fucking your ass).

rating: E (18+!!! This is literally smut and fluff. No y/n, age gap (around 10 years), soft Javier Peña, alternating pov, the plot of this chapter is anal, unprotected p in v (wrap it up!), creampie(s), anal sex (f receiving), anal fingering (f receiving), vaginal fingering, double penetration, oral sex (f receiving), rimming (f receiving), squirting, breeding kink, spanking, multiple orgasms, praise kink (oh boy, is there praise), dirty talk, banter, domestic fluff, aftercare, Javier being a consent king, Javier being adorable)

word count: 9.3k+

a/n: Yes, I dedicated an entire chapter to anal, don’t look at me, we all wanted it! Absolutely finished this chapter on a crowded plane flying across the continent to @juletheghoul's house. Shoutout to @azure-waves for giving this a look over.

Thank you for reading! Comments and reblogs feed me. I’d love to know what you thought!

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“Hot date tonight?” your coworker and best friend, Robyn, asked as you hurriedly got up from your chair at the nurse’s station desk. Four patient charts you’d finished notating were held in one of your arms, pressed to your chest.

“What makes you think I have a hot date?” you replied, walking behind her to the opposite wall where the hanging file folder rack was, putting them in the right slot for the next shift.

“You’re antsy,” she answered in her Texas twang, making your way back to her, taking a seat beside her.

Robyn always looked like she was ready for a night out with her beautiful chestnut-colored hair pulled up in a ponytail, her lips painted in cherry red lipstick, and her makeup looking professionally done. It must take her a while to get ready in the morning, and frankly, you could never—for you, it was making yourself look presentable, and that’s it; hell, some mornings you didn’t even bother with makeup.

Your leg bounced as you checked your watch, seeing your day was over in less than ten minutes, hoping the nurse who was supposed to take over arrived on time.

“And,” Robyn continued, your head turning to meet her blue eyes, her smirking, “you did your chart notes faster than a sneeze through a screen door, so I know you’re dyin’ to get the hell out of here.”

Looking down the hall in front of the desk and side to side to make sure no one was around, you leaned close, whispering, “Every date with Javi is hot, but tonight we’re trying something new…”

Her eyes were sparkling in delight as she gave you a toothy smile. “In the bedroom?” she inquired.

“Yeah…”

There was excitement on her face. “Ooh, lemme guess. Bondage?”

That had you intrigued, thinking of the times you’ve seen Javi with ropes at the ranch and how good he was with them, now imagining him tying you up or fuck, tying him up—heat was creeping up your neck.

“No.” You shook your head.

“Blindfolds?”

That was another one that had your attention, Javi covering your eyes and doing whatever he wanted to you. God, and if you were tied up, too? Swallowing thickly, you were suddenly feeling very warm.

“No…” you finally answered.

“Roleplay?”

“Not yet.” You wagged your finger. “But he’s down to play out my Detective Peña fantasy—so I’ve got something to look forward to.”

Sunday night, when you and Robyn had secretly gone over to Chucho’s to prep the pork for the tamales, you’d told her all about the Detective Peña dream when the older man left the room. The three of you had drunk beers and gossiped about the townspeople while you got the Crockpot ready.

“Get it, girl!” she replied, high-fiving you. “Okay, so y’all are kinda vanilla. This thing you’re excited about tonight, does it take you out of your comfort zone?”

Your face pinched. “Vanilla?” you asked. “We are not vanilla—we have had sex in too many risky places to be vanilla.”

“Sure, but he’s only stuck his dick in your mouth or pussy...”

Footsteps sounded coming closer from the hallway to your right, both of you pausing as your friend Gil, an orderly, came into view assisting one of your elderly patients using a walker, her on his left side closest to the desk.

“Hi, Miss Martha!” you and Robyn greeted in unison with big smiles. “Hey, Gil!”

“Hi, girls,” the old woman replied, smiling at you both.

“Hello, ladies,” Gil’s sweet voice said. He could be described as a human teddy bear—soft, adorable, and huggable.

“Way to get those steps in, Miss Martha!” you told her. “That new hip is doing you wonders.”

They were halfway past the desk.

“It sure is. Soon I’ll be walkin’ without Gil’s help.”

“Yes, you will,” he replied. “You’ll be out walking me in no time.”

“Such a nice young man.” They were almost to the other end of the desk. “You girls, have a blessed day!”

“We’ll see you tomorrow, Miss Martha,” Robyn called out to her.

“See you later, Gil,” you said,

“Bye, ladies.” He waved as they made it out of view and earshot.

Your attention turned back to Robyn, continuing your conversation from before, “He’s only stuck his dick in my mouth or pussy until tonight.”

Her eyes got big. “Oh my god,” she whispered. “You’re finally gonna let him fuck your ass?”

Smiling, you nodded, speaking just as quietly, “Yes. You sold me on it when you said you’ve never come quicker than when you do anal.”

“It’s true and so fuckin’ good. You’re gonna love it! Just remember lube, lube, lube, and relax. Javi’s a stand-up guy, so I have no doubt he’ll get you ready.”

“Oh, yeah—the man loves foreplay, and he’s been looking forward to this for a while, so I know he’ll make sure it’s a good time.”

“Okay, but Javi’s been obsessin’ about your ass for so long. I gotta know his reaction when you told him you were down to try it.”

“Oh my god, Robyn, he was so fucking ridiculous,” you answered in exasperation. First thing that morning, you’d told her about the previous day, making tamales with your boyfriend’s family and the barbecue, even bringing her a couple she loved. “Like, we were at his dad’s, as you know, and ended up fucking in Javi’s bathroom with the house full of people—don’t give me that look—“ You pointed at her. “—he can be really fucking irresistible, and I just can’t help it—all common sense leaves my brain, and my pussy takes over.”

“Hey—” She put up her hands in defense. “—I ain’t judgin’ you. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve been fucked in a busy bar bathroom.”

Taking a deep breath, you replied, “You know, I thought my sex life with Javi was very adventurous and kinky, but then you come in here talking about getting fucked in busy bar bathrooms or going to orgies in San Antonio, and I’m not so sure—Oh god,” you gasped, eyes wide, coming to a realization.

Her eyebrows furrowed. “What?”

“We’re vanilla!” you exclaimed. “We’re so fucking vanilla!”

Robyn laughed, pushing your shoulder. “I fuckin’ told you! But hey, y’all are more than welcome at the next orgy.” She wagged her eyebrows.

You made a face, not liking that idea one bit.

“Thanks, but no thanks. We’re kinda… territorial and not into sharing.”

That was a big thing you and Javi agreed on—neither of you wanted or needed anyone else; it was him and you for the rest of your lives, and you were both beyond happy with that.

“Suit yourselves.” She shrugged. “Okay, so you fucked at his dad’s...”

“Yes.” You nodded. “We fucked, and afterward is when I mentioned it, and he fucking tried to get me to leave right that second! Just completely forgot I said we couldn’t do it until today. I was like, ‘Javier, we are not bailing on your family barbecue for sex,’ and he, honest to god, pouted—” You threw up your hands. “—and he was so fucking clingy all night, grabbing my ass constantly. He was stuck to me like glue, and his family kept teasing the fuck out of him for it.”

“I ain’t even surprised,” she replied. “I swear, all men ever think about is sex and don’t much care about anythin’ else.”

That made you frown. “Javi isn’t always thinking about sex—he’s honestly a big fucking sweetheart. God, you can’t tell anyone, but sometimes he says the most poetically romantic shit in Spanish. You’ve seen the Addams Family movies, right? The new ones?”

“Of course—Addams Family Values is my favorite.”

“Same. Javi goes full Gomez—like the same level of devotion and obsession, and I sometimes can’t believe he loves me like that. Me! And he’s so hot, Robyn. What in the actual fuck. How did I land him?”

“‘Cause you’re a goddamn catch and amazin’,” she answered, patting your knee. “Hell, if Javi hadn’t gotten there first, I would’ve made a pass at you.” She winked.

Your lips pulled up in a grin. “I am so fucking flattered right now.”

“Good—I am so excited for your evenin’ plans!”

“I am, too! And nervous.”

“Oh, don’t be, girl.” She waved away your words. “He’ll make sure you’re good and ready and then take you to fuckin’ paradise.”

“God, I know he will.”

The nurse taking over for you was five minutes late with a coffeeshop coffee in hand. You’d given her a quick rundown on how your four patients were doing and when you last administered medications before bolting from the hospital.

Excitement and nerves were swirling in your belly on your drive home, the music turned down, and the air conditioning all the way up while you thought about what you’d do in the hour you had before Javi would be home from work; a shower was necessary, figuring he wouldn’t mind if you took one alone.

Should you lie on the bed naked, waiting for him when you were done?

A plan wasn’t made on when the event would take place. It was unspoken between you both that it was definitely happening after work; neither of you could wait.

He’d love coming home and finding you ready for him—you’d have the supplies, too, lube a must, some glasses of water, and maybe the sex towel, which was a big, thick, black towel that was used when sex was messy, like on your period, or if he was in the mood to make you squirt.

It was a surprise when you pulled into your parking spot at the apartment, and Javi’s truck was already in the neighboring one, making you wonder how long he’d been home as you grabbed your purse and exited your car.

Briskly, you walked to your front door, quickly getting it open and going inside. Your keys were tossed in the large bowl on the console table in the entryway with Javi’s own keys and wallet, your purse set beside it, toeing off your shoes.

He wasn’t in the living room, and the bedroom door was closed, assuming that was where he was.

“Javi?” you called, making your way toward it. “Why are you home early?”

Turning the doorknob, you pushed open the door, stopping when you took in the room.

Rose petals led from the doorway and up onto the end of the mattress, Javi’s bedside lamp on, the rest of the room illuminated by lit candles on the dressers, and for a split second, you thought he was going to propose, until you saw the sex towel neatly folded on top of the bed, with the bottle of lube nestled on it—the whole scene was honestly fucking hilarious. You would’ve laughed, but instead, your eyes were going wide, sucking in a breath at your boyfriend naked as the day he was born, sitting there with his back against the pillows, black-rimmed reading glasses on as he read a paperback easily held in one of his big hands.

The book lowered, his head tilting up, looking at you with a smile on his face. “Hola, mi amor (Hello, my love),” he rasped.

You gulped, your body feeling hot. “Hi, Javi,” you breathed. “What, uh, what’s all this?” you asked, gesturing toward him.

He grabbed his bookmark on the mattress beside him, shoving it in the paperback and setting it on the table. “You know exactly, what this is,” he replied, discarding his glasses on top of the book, Javi getting up from the bed with a groan.

It took you a second to get your wits about you as Javi closed the distance. “You got fucking rose petals—” you said, pointing at the trail of them. “—and lit candles, like it’s our anniversary or some shit. Not to mention, you looking like something straight out of a goddamn wet dream—the glasses, Javier? The glasses while naked, Javier? Are you trying to kill me with your sexiness?”

He snorted, crowding into your space, his hands cradling your jaw as his mouth slotted against yours in a searing kiss, your eyes closing, your fingers finding their way in his damp hair, realizing he’d already showered. You moaned when he licked into your mouth, tangling his tongue with your own in the way that made your toes curl.

God, he was perfect, and you loved him more than anything.

The kissing slowed, him murmuring into your lips, “I wasn’t trying to kill you, baby—was just reading while I waited for you.”

You pulled on his hair to make him look at you, his eyes hooded and mouth turned up in a smirk under his perfectly trimmed mustache.

“You’re a dirty fucking liar,” you accused. “But a sexy, dirty fucking liar—what’s with the petals and candles? You’ve literally never been this romantic when we fuck.”

He frowned. “I’ve been romantic when we fuck,” he argued.

“Okay, yes, we’ve had very romantic sex before—I quite enjoyed when you made me sit on your dick while we watched the sunset at your dad’s last week. I just mean, you’ve never gone all out like this. Why tonight?”

He had a look on his face like it was obvious. “It’s a special occasion…”

You huffed out a breath, patting his cheek. “It’s anal, babe—horny, nasty sex that you’re going to be feral about, not us celebrating Valentine’s.”

His eyes darted away. “But it’s your first time getting fucked in the ass, so I wanted to make it memorable…” He sighed, pushing his fingers through his hair. “It’s too much…”

“Hey, it’s not too much,” you reassured him, getting his eyes to meet yours. “It’s sweet, and I can assure you I didn’t need all of this pizazz for it to be memorable—I’ll always remember tonight and how you took my ass virginity.”

An amused breath left him, his hands moving to squeeze your behind. “Yeah, I am going to take your ass virginity.” He smacked your asscheek. “And I can’t fucking wait—go take a shower.”

“Someone’s bossy,” you replied, pulling your shirt off and letting it drop to the floor. Pecking his lips, you moved around him, heading toward the bathroom, pausing to get your pants and socks off.

“Someone’s horny,” he corrected, picking up your top and tossing it in the dirty clothes hamper.

Looking over your shoulder as you unhooked your bra, your eyes dipped down to see he was already half-hard. “Yeah, you are horny.” Your bra was off, now shimmying out of your underwear. “When did you get home?”

“An hour ago.”

You were completely naked, walking to your destination.

“Second day on the job, and you left work early for sex.” In the en suite, you flicked on the light and fan, grabbing and putting on your shower cap to keep your hair dry as you moved to the shower, Javi standing in the doorway.

“Told the Sheriff I had an important errand to run.”

The water had been turned on, waiting for it to warm. “Uh huh, and did the florist ask what you needed the rose petals for?” you asked over the roar of the shower.

“Yeah, I told her about how you made mi mamá's tamales and that I had a surprise for when you got home today—she assumed jewelry, and I didn’t correct her.”

“Oh, I was surprised, alright.” It was finally hot enough, getting in under the spray and quickly beginning to wash yourself. “Honestly, you in nothing but a pair of glasses is way better than anything, including jewelry, unless!” you exclaimed. “It’s a ring for my left hand—that trumps everything, even your dick.”

A mass in the shape of your boyfriend blocked the light outside of the frosted glass door of the shower stall, him rolling it open while you were in the process of scrubbing your front with a loofah.

“Fucking knew you’d like the glasses,” he said, reaching to palm your soapy breast, his fingers tweaking your nipple.

“I fucking knew you wore them on purpose,” you replied, turning to face the water to rinse off, his hand falling. “I see we’re glossing over the engagement ring mention, which, I won’t lie, the flower petals and candles had my hopes up.”

“Oh.” Glancing over at him, his eyes were wide, his face gone pale. “Oh, fuck, I’m so fucking sorry, Cielito.”

You waved away his apology with your free hand, scrubbing your body one more time. “There’s nothing for you to apologize for. I saw the towel and lube and realized you were just being romantically horny. I’m not disappointed. I’m extremely excited about tonight. Do you have a game plan?”

“Yes.”

“Are you going to tell me your game plan?”

“No.”

“Oh, how the turn tables,” you replied, reminded of the morning before when you kept it a secret what you were going to do to him. “Now, you are not allowed to stray from your plan but let me guess.”

“Okay.” He sounded amused, crossing his arms over his broad chest.

You were making sure every bit of you was clean while you said, “For foreplay, you’ll eat me out, and use your fingers in my ass to get me ready, then you’ll put me on all fours so you can hit it from the back.”

There was a thoughtful expression on his face, humming in the back of his throat. “You’re correct that I’ll use my fingers, and at some point, I will have you on your hands and knees.”

“Two outta three isn’t bad.”

“It’s more one out of the three.” He shrugged.

Your eyebrows knitted together. “But you said you were going to put me on my hands and knees… How did I not get it right?”

He smirked. “You’ll find out.”

“Well, now I’m curious as fuck. Towel me.” The water was turned off, your entire body completely clean, as Javi disappeared for a second, returning with a fluffy white towel. It was the world’s quickest shower, and you hurriedly dried yourself off before getting out, leaving the towel on the floor and hanging up the shower cap to dry.

“Good?” he asked, standing in front of you.

“I am squeaky clean and ready to rumble.” You nodded.

Javi grabbed your hand, leading you into the bedroom, his excitement practically palpable, making you smile. He ushered you onto the bed, getting you in the middle, him following and ending up on top of you. His fingers laced with yours above your head, his hips resting in the cradle of your spread thighs, kissing you hard.

Arousal was thrumming in your veins, feeling it burning in your belly, wanting him so badly—his tongue pressed between your lips, sliding along yours, pulling a moan from your throat. Your pussy was weeping for him, knowing you were wet, the anticipation of the evening swelling inside you.

He held both of your hands easily in one as his mouth moved, nipping at your chin and kissing a wet streak along your jaw and down your neck, gasping his name when he sucked over your pulse.

“You want me, Cielito?” he asked against your skin, his free hand grabbing your bare breast and squeezing it while his lips found their way onto your collarbone.

“Yes, Javi,” you moaned. “Want you so bad.”

His cock was hard between your bodies, pressing into your belly, Javi keeping your hands where they were while he maneuvered to suck your pebbled nipple into his mouth, your back arching at the jolt of pleasure shooting straight to your cunt. His teeth grazed against it, and your mouth fell open, wishing you could grab his hair. He moved to your other breast to give it the same treatment, your eyes squeezing shut.

“It’s so good, Javi,” you gasped.

He came off your hard bud with a wet pop, his head moving to look you in the eyes.

“Can I fuck you?” he asked.

Your eyes widened. “Uh, I feel like we’re missing the very important step where you use your fingers to make sure your big dick doesn’t hurt me. There’s no way you could fuck me yet—I’m clenching at the thought.”

“No, not your ass.” He shook his head. “Your pussy—I’m not gonna just shove my dick inside you without the right prep. I’m not an asshole.”

You let out a relieved breath. “I know you’re not an asshole, babe. It’s a little surprising you want to fuck my pussy when I’m giving you free rein of my ass.”

A little smile appeared on his lips. “Baby, if I stick my dick in your ass, I will come immediately, so I need to get off before to actually last.”

Your eyebrows lifted. “Damn, I knew you were really into it, but immediately?”

“Yeah—been waiting to do this for so fucking long, you’ll make me lose it.”

“Why is that so hot? Of course, you can fuck me, Javi. I know you’ll make me feel really good.”

“Thank you, Cielito,” he replied, leaning in to kiss you tenderly. He let go of your hands and sat up on his knees with a groan. “Need you on your hands and knees, baby,” he said, lightly smacking your thigh.

“So, you are fucking me in doggy. I just got the hole wrong,” you replied, flipping over onto your stomach. His big hands grabbed onto your hips, pulling you up into position.

“Yeah, so you were wrong—move forward a bit. Can you get into that one yoga thing?”

“Which pose?”

“Where your ass is up in the air, and your chest is against the floor.”

“Oh, puppy pose.” You kept your butt high, spreading your knees a little, dropping your chest down to the mattress to rest your forehead on your folded arms. This caused your hips to tilt back and really put your pussy on display. “I think I deserve half credit, at least for kinda getting it right.”

“A wrong answer is a wrong answer.”

Your eyes narrowed, turning your head to the side to look back at him as best you could. “You’re a real hardass, Javier—thank god you didn’t go into teaching.” The thought conjured up images of him as a professor, wearing a suit and his reading glasses, looking grumpy while he taught, and it made your skin feel hot, swallowing hard.

He was smirking like he knew what you were thinking, and it annoyed you, his hands squeezing your ass. “What’s making you horny, mi amor (my love)?”

“God,” you groaned, facing forward again, your words muffled. “I’m too fucking attracted to you and the goddamn glasses!”

“What, baby?” he asked, sliding his palm along your spine.

“You’re just really sexy, and I was thinking about you as a professor, and it got me all hot and bothered—anyways, I’m so fucking horny, and I’d like to be fucked, please,” you said, wiggling your backside at him.

His hand landed hard on your ass in a loud slap, gasping at the pleasurable sting.

“Such good manners,” he replied. “You gonna be a good girl and let me make you feel good?” he asked, smoothing his palm over your asscheek.

“Yes, Javi. I want it—I want you.”

“I’ve got you, baby.”

The springs in the mattress complained from him moving behind you, and you expected to feel his dick, a surprised sound coming from your mouth as he spread open your cheeks instead and felt him spit on your pussy. His tongue slid through your slit from just below your clit up to your entrance and back down again over and over, Javi groaning into your skin.

Pleasure ignited in your belly, feeling it slowly building in your core. He was teasing you, avoiding your clit, laving at the lips of your sex to lick up your arousal, swirling his tongue around your entrance, and dipping it inside to taste you from the source, your hands clenching in the bedding beneath you.

“It’s so good,” you moaned. “It’s so fucking good, Javi.”

He hummed in the back of his throat, finally moving low enough to flick his tongue over your neglected bundle of nerves, making you gasp his name, feeling yourself getting closer and closer to your end.

Licking a broad stroke up through your folds, he kept going, and your breath hitched when he got to your tight ring of muscle. He licked and prodded at it, all of the many nerve endings being stimulated, making your toes curl at how good it felt, sparks tingling outward from your clit—you were so close to your release, you could taste it, rough sounds coming from Javi’s chest as he licked around your hole, pressing his wet muscle inside.

Using the heel of his palm, he rubbed your clit, moving it quickly from side to side—his mouth, his hand, they had everything coming to a head, you falling over the edge with a cry of his name, your body tensing up as euphoria flowed in your veins.

His head left you, hearing him panting out, “Good girl,” while he helped you ride out your high.

Some seconds later, there was jostling behind you again, removing his hand from you, your body feeling relaxed. He rubbed comfortingly along your spine. “You good? Can I fuck you now, mi amor (my love)?”

“Absolutely,” your muffled voice answered. Turning your head, you continued, “I need you to fuck me.”

He smacked your ass, smiling. “Then I will.” Leaning to the side, Javi grunted as he reached to grab something, realizing it was the lube when you heard him pop open the cap, getting some on his hand to slick up his cock. The bottle was set by his knee, him pressing the bulbous tip of himself against your soaked entrance, your mouth falling open as he easily slid home in one smooth thrust, feeling so full—Javi nestled so deep inside, you weren’t sure where he ended, and you began.

“Fuck that’s good,” he breathed, pulling out almost all the way and pushing back in, your forehead dropping to your arms.

“It’s so good,” you moaned.

His pace wasn’t slow or fast, a happy medium of him steadily thrusting in and out of you, your tight walls hugging him, and trying to suck him deeper into your depths. That familiar heat was making itself known at the base of your spine, hearing the slap of skin on skin, his hands squeezing your hips.

“Cielito?” he grunted.

“Yeah?”

“If it’s too much, tell me.”

The sound of the cap on the lube clicked open again. “What are you—” Your sentence turned into a moan as Javi liberally squirted some of the liquid onto your puckered hole, your cunt clenching as it dawned on you what he was planning to do. “Oh, god, Javi,” you gasped.

His strokes didn’t waver, the bottle dropping to the bed, him saying through his teeth, “Tell me if it’s too much. Understand?”

He was going use his fingers in your ass while he fucked you, and it had your brain short-circuiting at imagining how it would feel.

His palm landed on your ass in a resounding smack, the sweet pain getting your attention.

“Do you understand, baby?” he asked.

“Yes!” you exclaimed, his thick cock pistoning into you. “Do it!”

His thumb circled your asshole, shivering at the tingles moving down your spine, then he was pressing in, your eyes rolling back in your head.

“Oh, fuck,” you whined, feeling even fuller—this was just his thumb, and it already felt like so much. How were the other fingers going to feel?

“Relax, Cielito,” he purred, his free hand rubbing soothingly against your hip, realizing your thighs had tensed up and relaxing them, welcoming the intrusion. “Good girl.” He pushed it in and pulled it out in time with his thrusts, the pleasure making your head spin, feeling yourself rocketing toward your release.

His thumb disappeared, replaced with one thick finger, then two, moaning loudly at how good it felt, it getting wetter between your legs, hearing the wet suck of your pussy taking him.

“You’re doing so good for me,” he said, the digits moving in sync with his hips. “So fucking good for me, baby. Does it feel good?”

Your mouth had fallen open, drooling onto the blanket below you, not sure if you could speak. His other hand lightly slapped your thigh. “Does it feel good, Cielito?”

“Yes,” you moaned. “Fuck, it’s so good—you’re fucking me so good!”

“I know I am.” You could hear the smile in his voice. “You’re taking my fingers so well, can’t wait to feel you squeeze my dick in this tight ass,” he ended the sentence by smacking it with his free hand.

You were getting close to your climax, the fire in your belly growing rapidly, rocking back on him to feel him deeper, wanting more—his cock was moving in and out of you at the same time as his fingers, filling you over and over again, pleasure rising inside you.

It was a lot—you couldn’t think of anything else except how fucking good he was making you feel.

“I think you can take one more,” he grunted. “Can you do that? Be my good girl and take all three?”

You had the presence of mind to answer, “Yes, Papí!”

He started pushing in the third finger, and your vision went white.

You were used to him occasionally putting a thumb in your ass when he was fucking you from behind, but three of his fingers? His hands could be classified as mitts they were so fucking big, and here he was, sticking three of his sizable fingers into your ass—you came immediately.

Your orgasm slammed into you hard, a strangled sound ripped from your throat as your body seized up so tight he had to come to a stop—Javi groaned loudly at you tightening around his cock and digits, pleasure exploding out from your core, feeling it in the tips of your fingers and toes, your thoughts becoming slow, thick like molasses.

Your pussy was still fluttering around him when your body went lax.

“Can I keep going?” Javi roughly asked.

The words weren’t forming on your tongue, so you settled for an affirmative hum and a shaky thumbs up.

He started moving again, his dick in your cunt and his fingers in your ass, spreading them inside you while you went along for the ride.

“I’m close,” he gritted out. “Almost took me with you.”

“An honorable way to go,” you slurred.

He chuckled, his digits leaving your hole as he bent over you, one arm holding himself up while the other went under your middle, groaning as he pulled you up on your knees, your back to his chest—his rhythm sped up, his hands on your tits holding you to him as he chased his high, one of yours on his hip behind you the other laced with his on your breast. His lips kissed your shoulder and the side of your neck, hearing him grunting close to your ear.

His thrusts started getting uneven.

“Fuck,” he gasped, his breath tickling the shell of your ear. “Gonna fuck my come deep—want it to, fuck.” He was panting, pausing to swallow, fucking into you harder. “Want it to ta—“ The word cut off into a pained sound, pushing his cock into you all the way to the root one last time as he came, feeling him thicken, jerking inside you and the wet pulse as spurts and spurts of his spend filled you, sinking his teeth into your shoulder, making you gasp at the pleasurable pain—he rolled his hips to fuck his come deeper, wanting to fill as much of you as he could.

He came to a stop, breathing hard, both of your bodies wet with a sheen of sweat coating them. He hissed as he pulled out, his release slowing dripping down your inner thigh, squeaking in surprise when he moved to lay on the bed next to you, bringing you down with him, landing half on top of him.

His head rested on a pillow, yours on his chest, the fingers of one of your hands sliding through his wet hair, his arm wrapped around your back, drawing shapes on the soft skin of your hip with his finger as you both came down from your highs.

Javier was so relaxed he thought there was a chance he’d melt into the mattress—his rapid heartbeat was beginning to slow and even out, her nails lightly scratching at his scalp, making sparks dance along his spine.

He was content, blissed out, happy, not to mention excited about what was to come. The thought of getting to fuck her ass made his cock stir, arousal starting to burn low in his gut, knowing he would be hard again in record time.

When she told him the day before that she wanted to try anal, he was ready to go right then—he didn’t want to wait, having dreamed about it for so long, he was aching to feel her so tight around his dick, and she was tight, snugly squeezing his fingers when they were inside her.

Another thing that riled him up was the fact he was the first to fuck her ass, and it had him feeling some type of way, knowing he’d be the first and last to get the honor, hoping she’d like it enough to want to do it again.

He was already half-hard just thinking about it, glad he’d been smart enough to come before the main event to ensure he lasted more than two, maybe three pumps—he wanted her to have a great first experience and it ending as soon as he worked his cock into her would be pretty fucking disappointing even though he knew she wouldn’t complain, always saying it was a compliment when he came sooner than he hoped.

Still, he was determined to do this right by her, wanting it to be a night she remembered fondly, which was why he left work early to get the rose petals, buy the tealight candles, and stop at the grocery store to get ingredients for him to make her dinner, well aware that she hadn’t eaten much that day. Were the candles and petals a bit much? Maybe, but her face, when she walked into the room, was worth it—seeing clearly how much he turned her on had pride swelling in his chest.

“Wow, that was something,” she croaked, breaking the silence and taking him from his thoughts.

“A good something?” he inquired, his finger on her hip, spelling out her first name and his last for probably the fifteenth time that they’d been lying like this.

She tilted her face up to look at him, her fingers stroking through the hair just above his ear.

“A very good something,” she replied. “Like, I was really fucking nervous about three of your huge ass fingers inside of my ass—just your thumb feels like a lot—but my god, Robyn wasn’t lying about you taking me to fuckin’ paradise.”

He snorted, turning his head to kiss her forehead, his chest puffing up a little. “You liked it that much?” Hope rose inside him that she’d answer in the affirmative.

“God, yeah. Your dick is going to feel so good. A big reason I wanted to try it was because she told me she’s never come quicker than when she does anal, and I get it now.”

“She convinced you?”

“Yep, she sure did. Oh! She gave me more ideas today.”

Smiling, he asked, “What ideas?”

“The first was bondage which immediately made me think of how good you are with those ropes at the ranch and you tying me up in bed.” His cock twitched, his blood heating. “The second was blindfolds, which really got me going at the idea of pairing that with the ropes, so I can’t see or move, and you can basically do whatever you want to me.”

His mouth had gone dry, his brain playing out possible scenarios that had his cock becoming fully hard.

He licked his lips. “Can we send her a fruit basket? That’s what you send people as thanks, right?”

She laughed, cradling his cheek. “Oh my god, the basket arriving at the hospital with a card reading, ‘Thanks for the orgasmic ideas,’ she’d love it, but I think she’d love a gift certificate to a spa even more.”

“We’ll fucking get her one,” he said, his head moving to kiss her palm.

“We’ll do that this weekend.”

“Good.” His dick was throbbing as it lay on his stomach. “Sorry, baby, I need to get on my side.”

“Not a problem,” she replied, moving off of him to lie on her back beside him as he turned onto his side to face her.

The flat of his hand moved up her stomach to grab one of her breasts while he leaned over her to kiss her lips, her fingers tangling in his hair—pinching at her hard nipple had her moaning. Javier took the opportunity to deepen the kiss with a press of his tongue into her mouth, sliding it along hers in practiced movements.

His hard cock dug into her hip, wetting her skin with precum, the kissing getting more fervent, their teeth clattering and noses bumping, almost like they were trying to fuse themselves together with their mouths. He skated his hand back down her body and over her soft belly to between her legs, sliding two fingers through their combined mess, using the slick to circle her swollen little clit.

“Javi,” she moaned into his lips, bucking her hips against his hand. “I want you.”

He nipped at her bottom lip, pulling back to look her in the eyes, hers glazed over in lust.

“You want my dick?” he asked through heavy breaths.

Biting her lip, she nodded. “Want it so bad.”

Quickly kissing her, he went into action, getting everything ready, the ache in his lower back making him groan when he sat up to grab the towel behind him, her lifting her hips for him to lay in on the bed under her, then he told her how he wanted her.

“Spread this leg out,” he ordered, tapping the thigh furthest away from him, watching her do as he said. “Keep this one up, okay?” The one closest to him, he bent at the knee, pushing it up her torso, nodding to himself that it opened her up enough for what he would do. He reached to grab the lube on the mattress.

Flicking the cap open, he poured a generous amount in his palm, stroking it onto his dick and putting more on his fingers.

“You let me know if it’s too much,” he said. “Okay, Cielito?” He pressed one finger into her tight hole, making her keen.

“Yes, Javi—more.”

Her words had a sharp spike of arousal cutting through him. She was relaxed, him easily pushing in another digit.

“Yes,” she gasped, her hand pressing to his chest and squeezing his pec. “More, Javi—give me more.”

“Yeah, baby?” His third finger went in with hardly any resistance. “You like my fingers inside you?”

“Yes,” she moaned as he started pumping them in and out, spreading them inside to stretch her open.

“Think you’re ready for my dick?” Excitement was bubbling in his chest, his cock so fucking hard it was almost painful, ready to go at her word.

“Give it to me,” she replied. “I want it, Javi.”

At this moment, and every other they shared together, he was her devotee and would worship her like she deserved, and now she was gifting him with herself, Javier intimately aware of just how lucky he was to be given this opportunity.

He’d been waiting for this, and he was going to make it so fucking good for her.

The first time he put his dick in someone’s ass, he was a teenager, and he’d grown since then, no longer fumbling with the condom, knowing there needed to be a lot of lube and that he had to loosen up his partner with his fingers to make it enjoyable for the both of them—mistakes were made when he was younger, and now he was older and wiser, and knew how to make it good for everyone involved.

Another reason he was chomping at the bit to do this was she was letting him fuck her bare, which was something he’d never done before, and he was dying to know what it’d feel like.

His hips turned toward her, holding himself on one arm, his other hand stroking his cock, steadily leaking precum, getting closer to press the tip to her asshole. He started pushing in, his mouth falling open, making his insides burn with want at the tight squeeze. Getting halfway in, he had to pause and take a deep breath to calm down, already so worked up, he was genuinely worried he’d come.

She was mewling, making noises that were going straight to his dick when he finally bottomed out, lying down on his side next to her, putting one arm beneath her neck, the second hooking under her knee to keep her leg up, resting his palm on her breast.

Her tight ring of muscle was constricting around the base of his cock so tightly it almost hurt, Javier needing a second—she turned her head toward him, her eyes dark and heavy-lidded, her forehead glistening in sweat looking so beautifully fucked out of her mind, it had him leaning forward to kiss her, the familiar press of her lips grounding him, getting him to the point he could pull almost all the way out and push back in.

His groans came unbidden as he set up a slow pace to get her used to him, surprised when her body tensed up not even a minute later, and she came with a loud moan into his mouth, her ass squeezing him like a vise.

He broke the kiss, his heart racing, panting breaths. “Fuck, already? Do you want me to keep going?” he asked.

Her eyes were closed. “Yes,” she answered roughly. “Go until you come.”

“Okay, baby,” he replied, her relaxing enough that he could start moving again, his mouth finding hers once more, sharing breaths as he worked in and out of her faster than before.

His stomach was knotting up in pleasure with every push and pull of his hips, her leg shaking in his hold, her making sounds that almost sounded inhuman, clearly losing herself to how good she was feeling—he wasn’t much better, their kissing messy, mashing their mouths together, him completely wrecked out of his mind.

She was just so warm and tight, it lulling him to his end—fucking into her over and over again, grunting in exertion.

“Fuck!” she cried, as she seized up and shuddered, Javier feeling as she came again, his mouth leaving hers to grit his teeth, trying to stave off his own orgasm by holding entirely still inside her.

“Fuck, Cielito.” He kissed her shoulder. His forehead was wet with sweat, feeling a drop drip down his cheek while he caught his breath. “You’re gonna make me come, baby, if you keep doing that.”

She looked utterly blissed out, blinking her eyes open in a way that made it seem like they wanted to stay closed, only half-focusing on him.

Her hand came up to pat his cheek, her words slurring when she spoke. “You’re gonna make me pass out if you keep doing that.”

“Do you want me to stop?”

“Nope.” She poked his nose, making him smile at her adorableness. “We’re just gonna see what happens, and if I pass out, I pass out—won’t be the first time or the last.”

“You think one more will do you in?”

“I know one more will knock me the fuck out.”

He was so fucking close, starting to rock in and out of her, knowing that if she came again, he’d go with her—an idea came to him.

“Do you trust me?” he asked.

“Oh, boy, what are you planning?” She sounded drunk. “You only ask that when you’re gonna do something exceptionally good.”

He smiled. “I am.”

“Bring it on, babe.”

Kissing her, he started moving faster, his thick cock slickly sliding in her depths, her moaning again, the muscles in his belly winding tighter and tighter.

The clean hand holding up her leg went to between her thighs, pushing one, then two fingers into her come-filled cunt, crooking them to rub against that one spot that drove her wild, fucking his digits into it over and over again.

Hedonistic sounds filled the air—she was making noises he’d never heard before that bordered on animalistic, him grunting, his fingers squelching in her pussy, while his cock wetly pounded into her ass—all of it spurring him on to his own release.

Her cunt had started to flutter, and he knew she was close.

“Come on, Cielito,” he said through his bared teeth. “One more. I know you’re close; take me with you, baby.”

Soon her back was arching, clenching down hard on his fingers and cock, a guttural groan vibrating out of his chest at her pussy gushing around his digits, soaking the towel beneath her—it sent him with her, his balls tightening up as he pushed into her one last time, his dick pulsing, coming with a ragged moan, his body awash in pleasure as he filled her ass.

He was wrung out, every muscle in his body relaxing, his head sinking into the pillow, his eyes feeling heavy, and thinking he might fall asleep. Javier removed his hand from her cunt, pulling out of her and putting her leg down so she’d be more comfortable, his breaths and heartbeat starting to slow, their bodies shining in the lights of the room from sweat.

His eyes closed, and moments later, he was frowning that she wasn’t playing with his hair like usual.

A soft snore sounded, opening one of his eyes to find hers closed with her mouth open.

Oh, he fucked her unconscious.

She hadn’t been exaggerating that one more would make her pass out.

He didn’t want her sleeping with the mess he made between her legs, so he moved to get off the bed without another thought, not caring he was tired.

He blew out all of the candles on his way to the en suite, cleaning himself up before taking care of his needs and washing his hands when he was finished. Returning to the bedroom, he had a warm wet washcloth that he used to gently wipe her down, and she was still knocked out cold, not even stirring; she just kept snoring.

The real challenge was getting her under the blankets. He feared she’d be cold and eventually succeeded in tucking her in on her side of the bed, Javier a bit sweaty from the effort and feeling really good about himself that she remained asleep—he mentally patted himself on the back for fucking her so good.

Yawning, he put the dirtied towel and washcloth into the hamper, then turned off the bedside lamp, crawling into bed with her. He scooted to cuddle up next to her, his arm going over her middle, breathing in her scent as he dozed off with a little smile.

Where were you?

What year was it?

All you knew for sure was you were burning up, a weight halfway on top of you that was hot; realizing it was a person when you heard a snore—their scent finally processed in your brain, and you realized it was your boyfriend.

You were in your shared bed with Javier Peña.

Your voice was gravelly when you tried to speak. “Javi?”

His body lightly jolted, and you knew he’d awoken.

“Hmmm?” he hummed, nuzzling his nose against your ear.

“Who’s president?”

His voice was raspier. “What?”

“Who’s president?”

“Bill Clinton? What’s wrong, amor (love)?”

“I apparently passed out so hard I forgot where and when I was.”

His breath tickled your ear when he huffed out amusedly. “You thought I fucked you into a coma?” he asked.

“Oh my fucking god—” You sat up as best you could, Javi making a sad sound that you moved. “—you fucked me unconscious!”

The room was softly glowing by the sun coming through the gaps in the blue linen curtains, Javi sitting up, too, the blankets pooling at his bare waist.

“Yeah?” he replied, rubbing the sleep from his eye. “You said one more would take you out, and you were right—out like a goddamn light.”

“Javier, did you… Am I recalling correctly, did you make me squirt?”

“Yes, I fucking did.” He sounded beyond proud of himself.

The orgasm had been unlike any you’ve ever had before, so intense it was no wonder you blacked out.

“With how easily you were coming,” he continued, “I was pretty fucking sure I could do it, and I did.” He leaned over, giving you a loud, smacking kiss on your cheek.

You smiled, pushing on his shoulder. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, you’re just real fucking proud of yourself, aren’t you?”

He was smirking. “I mean five orgasms in what, less than two hours? I think I did pretty fucking good.”

Your hand went across your body to cup his cheek. “Yeah, baby, you did really fucking good,” you replied, pulling him in for a kiss, feeling him smiling into it.

“Did you like it?” he asked against your lips.

Breaking apart, you smiled. “Um, yeah, I think the orgasms are confirmation I was really into it.”

“You’d, uh, wanna do it again?”

Pushing his bangs out of his face, you answered, “Absolutely. It’s just something we have to plan for, but I’m down—I’m really curious what it would be like if you gave me the Javi special.”

His eyebrows creased. “The Javi special…? What’s that?”

“When you rail me from behind—like, I don’t know if you’re aware, but you’re really fucking good at it. I mean, you’re good at all the positions. It’s just with back shots you get, I don’t know, feral? You let loose and just go for it, and it’s always a good fucking time. So, I’m just imagining the absolute pounding you’d give my ass, and I won’t lie, the thought makes my pussy throb.”

His hand cradled your jaw, rubbing his thumb over your bottom lip. “Yeah? You want me to fuck your ass hard?”

“Yes.” You nodded. “Very much.”

Leaning in, he hovered his lips over yours, whispering, “Next time, I’ll give it to you any way you want—would you like that, baby?”

Arousal was starting to thread in your belly.

“Yes, I’d like that a lot,” you answered just as quietly.

“Good.” He nudged your nose with his. “Let’s go shower, then I’m gonna make you dinner—some steak has been marinating since I got home. I’m making you mi mamá’s fajitas.”

“Keep talking dirty to me—what did you marinate it in?”

He smiled, pecking your lips. “Cumin.” Another kiss. “Chile powder.” A quick peck. “Salt.” A kiss. “Lime juice.” A peck. “Lime zest.” His lips on yours again. “Olive oil.” He kissed you. “Garlic—“

“How much garlic?” You interrupted.

He chuckled. “Her recipe said two minced cloves, but you taught me to measure garlic with my heart, so I did three.” He kissed you again.

“God, that’s so sexy,” you murmured against his lips.

He pulled back. “I don’t know how the fuck to pronounce the last ingredient—wor-ces-ter-shire, wer-ches-ter—“

“Worcestershire.” You sounded it out. “Woos-te-sher.”

He made a face that made you giggle. “Are you fucking kidding me? Why are there so many extra fucking letters?”

“The British named it, babe.” You stroked your fingers through his hair, your stomach growling. “Fuck, I’m starving.”

“Get up. We’ll shower, then I’ll feed you.”

“I love you—you’re perfect.”

Tenderly he kissed you. “You’re the perfect one,” he said into your lips. “I love you so fucking much.”

“Oh!” You broke away from him. “Do you think we’re vanilla?”

His face scrunched. “What?”

“Like, sex, are we vanilla? Until tonight you’ve only stuck your dick in my mouth and pussy. We’d never fucking fathom going to one of those wild orgies Robyn likes to go to—“

“Fuck, no,” he cut in. “I’m not fucking possessive, but I sure as fuck am not sharing you.”

“That’s what I told her! Also, same, respectfully, you’re mine, and I’m yours, and there will be no one else—I don’t want anyone else.”

“That’s fucking right.” He gave you a quick kiss. “Did she call us vanilla?”

“Yeah, and like, I’m really thinking we might be…”

“What? ‘Cause you’re not pouring hot wax on my balls, or we don’t swing or whatever the fuck—I fucked your ass tonight and made you squirt; vanilla people don’t do that shit. They also don’t fuck outside of their home, so no, we’re not fucking vanilla.”

“Exactly! We have too much risky place sex.”

He nodded. “Fucked you in a house full of people yesterday.”

“Yes, you did,” you replied, cupping his cheeks. “And we get off on pretending you’re knocking me up—which reminds me, that was really hot all the stuff you said before you came the first time. If I hadn’t come so hard, you definitely would’ve gotten me again.”

He crookedly smiled, seeing the devotion in his eyes. “I can’t fucking wait to marry you—we’re perfect for each other.”

You grinned. “Wanna know a secret?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m literally counting down the days to our anniversary. I already have next year's calendar and the day marked.”

His face lit up, his dimple showing. “You wanna know a secret?”

“Of course.”

“I’m counting down the days, too, and I’ll need to see if you can take some time off around that date...”

“Oh my god, you’re taking me on a trip!” you exclaimed excitedly. “Where are you taking me? Wait, let me guess—obviously a beach.”

He frowned. “Why would it obviously be a beach?”

“Because you’re insanely romantic and know how much I love the beach and ocean, so that’d be where you’d do it. I don’t think you’d take me to Corpus Christi or anywhere on the Texas coast. I’d think maybe Florida—Miami since Steve and Connie are there, but we’re visiting them in December, and with their baby, we wouldn’t want to impose again so soon after. Oh! You brought up my passport a couple of weeks ago, so that eliminates California, and the US in general, which leaves an island!”

He let out a long, defeated sigh, his shoulders slumping. “Call me Detective Peña…” he grumbled. “You’re apparently Mrs. Detective Peña…”

“Actually, it’s future, Mrs. Detective Peña, because you insist on making us wait.”

“Yeah, I am,” he sighed. Suddenly he was perking up, “At least you won’t be able to guess the fucking island or hell, maybe I might take you to Mexico.”

“Nah.” You swatted away his suggestion. “You wouldn’t take me to Mexico—you’re too fucking stressed about the cartels and would be worried the entire time. You’re definitely taking me to an island.”

His eyes narrowed. “Okay, future Mrs. Detective Peña, I’ve had enough of you figuring out my plans. Get your ass out of bed—we’re showering, and then I’m making you a delicious fucking dinner because I love you so goddamn much, even though I’m a little annoyed with you right now.”

“That’s how I feel when you do it to me!” you laughed. “It’s annoying as fuck.”

“I see that.” He pouted. “Kiss me.”

“What?”

“Kiss me so I’ll stop being annoyed with you—I don’t like it.”

“Oh, my sweet future husband,” you cooed, doing as he asked, pushing your fingers in his hair and kissing him.

“Call me that again.” His muffled voice said.

“My sweet future husband—I love you.”

His lips smiled against yours. “I love when you call me that, and I love you, too, my perfect future wife.”

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Tagging: @theorganasolo @nicolethered @nessamc @vanemando15 @fiscinthirst @melancholyy-hill @hnt-escape @sherala007 @jadesabre83 @rainbeaubrightchild @blub-senpai @pedrohoe04 @theherothesavior @captain-creampuff @javiersjeans @zetasaturno99 @amb11 @lovedbyth3sun @siidereeus @marvelousmermaid @mrszdjarin @themarcusmoreno @woomen23 @ms-loverman-066 @star-wars-fan-2005 @kissing-stars @chloeinpink @notyourlovemonkey @unofficialavenger90 @fictionismyreality @sheetsof-lennon @damnyoupedro @katareyoudrilling @iamskyereads @enjoyourlattebitch @daddydindjarin @absurdthirst @kirsteng42 @littlemisspascal @athalien @thevoiceinyourheadx @elegantduckturtle @harriedandharassed @girlofchaos @mswarriorbabe80 @theewokingdead @guess-my-next-obsession @pedrostories

#pedro pascal #javier peña/reader #javier peña x reader #javier peña #javier peña smut #wheresarizona writes #learning to live series

[umadosedepascal]

P E D R O P A S C A L

O N L Y

__ FIC REQUEST OPEN __

SERIES

(Banners are here)

🔥NEW MEXICO(PART IX)- Pedro asks you to spend his birthday together with you. You just go.

W I N N E R(PART VIII) - You couldn’t attend SAG awards but Pedro meets you late in the night to celebrate.

O U C H (PART VII) - You are at the Golden Globes and meet Pedro over there, he didn’t win unfortunately but still, he is a winner in bed.

B O A T (PART VI) - Today is your last day in Malta. Pedro will be back to work, and you also need to return to your routine. Pedro wants your last day to be wonderful, nothing like a surprise with a perfect end. The three most intense days of your life.

COME FIND ME (PART V) - Pedro promised you a weekend, but an unforeseen event changes everything. Maybe he's a fan of surprises, maybe he can find you.

72 HOURS WITH HIM (PART IV) - The shooting in Malta keeps going, all Pedro needs is a weekend off, well…he got it. Would you go meet him for only three days? Hmmm yes!

PEDRO SOLO (PART III) - The days are long and exhausting, Pedro has a huge hotel room, hot tub ... But he is missing something, could you help him?

LOSING GAME (PART II) - You meet Pedro again not just to take back your panties. He wants to play a game, who’s going to lose?

HIGH MILES CLUB (PART I) - After partying hard at Met Gala making out with you in the bathroom and later taking you to his hotel room in NY, he finds something inside his red overcoat pocket in the middle of the airport. But it doesn’t stop, more unexpected and hot things happens during his flight back home.

ONE SHOT

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MASTERCHEF FAIL - With a busy schedule, Pedro finds some time to spend with you. You promised him to cook his favorite food. Maybe things get out of hand and dessert comes before dinner.

PURPLE IS THE HOTTEST COLOR - After having a difficult day, Pedro meets you, no patience, no time for conversations.Pedro only has one desire in mind: you here and now, no matter if anyone will see you.

————————————————

PEDRO I M A G I N E

It’s 3 in the morning…

Hey, I’m looking at you…

What a smile…

🔥 You wearing his purple shirt…

————————————————

Who are Santa Trindade

Gringa is on her late 30’s totally addicted to Pascal for the latest years (she doesn’t know what happened) although she’s following his work since 2019 because she is a Star Wars nerd and fell in love with a mandalorian 🤷🏻‍♀️. Her favorite Pedro boy is Javi Gutierrez because he is chubby and funny (Pedro vibes almost 100%).

What makes her wet is when Pedro: slide his finger on his lips while giggling.

Good vibes: if she had a date with Pedro she thinks she wouldn’t be able to walk the next day 🥲

——

@missyorkswhore is on her late 20’s and noticed Pedro when her uncle was watching Narcos, she saw Javier and asked him “wow, who’s that stach guy?”. A couple years later she finally got into Narcos and you know…she still want to marry Peña.

She loves when Pedro raises his eyebrow, and when he speaks Spanish [she thinks she can get wet in a fraction of seconds if he speaks like that to her in bed] ah and of course when he screams WHAT TOWN!!! as Joel.

Fave character obviously: DAVE FUCKING YORK (killer king)

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal fic #pedro pascal x f!reader #frankie catfish morales #frankie morales #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal imagine #pedrohub #joel miller x reader #dieter bravo #joel miller #dave york x reader #dieter bravo x reader #jose pedro balmaceda pascal #dave york #pedro pascal character fanfic #pedropascaledit #oberyn martell #pedro pascal x you

[chronically-ghosted]

there ain't enough room in this twin bed in our shitty Bogota apartment for the two of us

rating: E (explicit - 18+)

pairing: javier peña x f!reader

word count: 13K 🫣

summary: after surviving the bomb, you and javier make it home to your apartment . . . and promptly pick up right where you left off in the car. 

warnings/tags: canon typical violence, discussions of death/violence, oral (f receiving), piv sex, smut-smut-smut, edging, slight overstimulation, lots of feelings, no use of y/n

a/n: part two of Go On, I Dare Ya - the final chapter because writing smut for these two really wears me out

🤍 AO3 Link

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There’s a ringing. 

Smoke. Acrid and burning. It’s in your chest, your mouth, your eyes – is that why you can’t see? You cough and just breathe more in, inhaling nails that scrape your lungs. There’s a bright spot on your hip and back and palm – pain? – yes, that’s blood – fuck, where’s your gun? Why are you laying down?

There’s a ringing. A vibration. Like the world is made of brass and someone is tapping tapping tapping with their finger nail and you can actually feel the swelling ring –

There’s still smoke. Less now. Controlled. Intentional. But it still vaporizes the air in your lungs.

“Can you put that out?” You snap at the large fed standing by the doorway. Slowly, he lifts his eyes to you, frowning, as if you are being unreasonable. But eventually, your glare wins out over his and he, as if moving through molasses, reaches towards the metal table, and snuffs out the cigarette into a grimy ashtray.

You realize the ringing is someone speaking to you.

Noonan. She looks worried, pale, but determined. The lines around her mouth are sharp, distinct, as if someone with endless patience carved them out of her skin. She looks old, you think, an idea that doesn’t come to you very often, if at all. Her mouth is moving but you don’t really hear what’s coming out of it. You watch her lips move, they look like they’re made of rubber, flapping over an empty, black hole. White. Teeth. Bite.

Something warm touches your wrist and it’s like you’re sucked back into your body.

You blink, the overhead light of the empty interrogation room suddenly very bright, the scratch of the tape recorder as it rolls on in the silence. You can see yourself in the mirror over Noonan’s blue padded suit. God, you look terrible. Ashy, dirty, there’s a cut over your left eye and suddenly you’re aware of the blood there, the pain there, and in your hands and hips. By the pressure there, you know you’re going to have bruises if you don’t already. Your hands have bandages over them so you can’t see the damages, but the cloth scratches what feels like an open wound. How much blood is there?

Three sets of eyes watch you with varying mixtures of emotion. Noonan, verging on concern. The suit behind you – Ken Something – remains unimpressed. And –

The warmth on your wrist is Javi. Just the barest touch of his fingers. He gently says your name, your last name at least, and you hear it very, very clearly. You follow the bend of his fingers with your eyes, over his wrist, up his arm that has a large bandage just around the elbow, then up his shoulder – God, that white shirt is ruined, torn, bloodied, filthy – to his eyes. 

Eyes you saw in the midst of all that smoke and fire. Panicked and white like searchlights. You remember him screaming your name – your first name – then. 

He’s looking at you like he wishes you two are the only ones in all of existence. 

“Agent,” he says softly but firmly, “the senator asked you a question.” 

There’s a cut along the arch of his cheek and you want to touch it, but instead you turn back to Noonan.

“Sorry, I missed it. What did you say?” 

Noonan glances at Javier, something about concern communicated, before interlocking her fingers on the table in front of her. 

“I said, for the record, I’d like your account of what happened after the first bomb went off. We have Agent Peña’s and now I’d like yours.” 

The microphone in front of your face feels invasive, like some streaker just flashed you before running off, giggling. You try not to scowl.

“The car bomb in front of the gambling den went off and blew out half the building. Agent Peña and I were fifty feet up the road at the intersection of Manacha and Comal. It had been a strictly routine follow up to a tip we received on Tuesday. The target, Edwardo Valasquez, was rumored to be meeting with one of the upper narcos so the mission was to watch where he went, to validate that claim. Peña and I had been tailing him all day. That night, in the car, we –,” 

Your voice catches. The tape winds, black film consumed again and again. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Javier stiffen. The room still smells like smoke, but this time you can’t tell if it’s coming from your clothes or the ashtray.

You swallow. “We had been there for seven hours when the first bomb went off. The target didn’t come out before then and we didn’t see anyone mess with the rigged car. It was a trap.” 

“Who do you think the intended targets were?” Noonan asks, interest overtaking the worry on her face. Those lines around her mouth go slack, and that no-nonsense senator is back. 

“If someone drove it there and parked it, then most likely the target was Valasquez. It was dark, I couldn’t make out the faces of the men that drove it.” 

Noonan writes something down on the yellow pad beneath her hands. “And the perpetrators? Who sent the bomb?”

“Cali.” You say simply. “They’re sending a message that no one is safe unless they’re with them.”

Noonan nods grimly. She fixes those hawk-like eyes on you again. “And the second bomb?” 

“Insurance. I didn’t see it go off, but it looked like it was stationed at the exit behind us.”

“And where were you when the second bomb went off?” 

You swallow, mouth filled with smoke, and it feels like, for a second, that your guts are oozing out onto the table. You cross your arms to hold them in. 

“I don’t know. I was providing Agent Peña with cover when the explosion went off. There was a firefight, between the two cartels. Did I mention that? After the first bomb, the street erupted into an active warzone. They shot at us because they didn’t know who’s side we were on.” 

Noonan chuckles darkly, writing down something again. “I think a bomb going off would be enough to classify the situation as a warzone, but I understand your point.” 

She sighs and looks up. “We’re almost done. Just a few more questions. What happened after the second bomb went off?”

This is where it gets tricky. 

You’d think after a second bomb to go off within twenty feet of the first that there’d be noise. So much noise, for so much chaos. That much destruction cannot go quietly. But of all the things you remember about tonight, the first thirty endless seconds after you opened your eyes, sideways on the pavement, hip bones grinding into the rocks and debris, gun out of your hands and lost to the smoke, those were thirty seconds of silence.

You know if given time, you could parse it out, you could construct something like a timeline. But now, in this yellow smoky room, you can’t quite put it together. You remember people, people bloodied, people dead, you remember something about gathering up an old woman in your arms and dragging her until something inside you told you to stop. You remember you couldn’t find Javier, and the sinking, horrific dread that clawed into your bones. You remember EMTs and lights and the scream of sirens and the fires and the smoke. But you don’t know the order. 

“I don’t remember.” 

“You don’t remember?” Noonan frowns. “Were you cleared for release?” 

“I . . .”

You trail off, unable to find the words. You think you remember someone checking for a concussion. Yes, thick, square hands grasping your elbows, forcing you to look, look at him, are you okay, are you bleeding, are you hurt – 

“Yes, Senator, she was.” Javier’s voice is smooth, collected. He has his arms crossed against his chest and his left knee is bouncing. You know that look. He’s about ready to start cracking heads for a cigarette. “I saw it personally myself.” 

“Okay, but why –,”

“With all due respect, ma’am, it’s shock. Plain and simple.” You don’t understand why he’s taking that tone so you look at him. To everyone else, he appears bored, disinterested, eager to get out. But to you, he’s coming apart at the seams. His dark eyes haven’t left your face since you started speaking. “This was her first bombing.” 

Something about his words breaks through this numb little box you’ve found yourself in and you can feel the grime on your face pinch your skin as you frown at him. His mouth flattens; what are you looking at me like that for? 

“Is that true, Agent?” Noonan pulls your attention away from Javi. 

“Yes, ma’am.” 

Noonan rifles through a folder to her right, another line appearing between her eyebrows. “And reports say you helped at least five civilians to safety? You did that, while experiencing shock?” 

“I –,”

“Yes, she did.” Javier cuts you off and leans forward onto his elbows. He’s closer than he was before and you smell the smoke on him. “This agent performed admirably under intense pressure and I am officially recommending her for commendation.”

“Javier –,” you hiss as the air in your lungs evaporates. He won’t look back at you.

Noonan raises an eyebrow before putting her pen to the pad again. “Noted, Agent Peña.” 

“Please, don’t write–,” 

“Is there anything else, Senator?” Javier’s knee is incessant, liable to knock over the entire table in a single twitch. With a sigh, Noonan reaches over and switches off the recording. 

“No, Peña, there’s nothing else . . . for tonight. But you can bet your ass there’ll be a shitload of crap tomorrow. I wish I could tell you both to take tomorrow off, given the hell you just went through, but there’s already inquiries coming in from the press and the government. Both ours and Colombia. What a fucking nightmare . . .” 

She stands, collecting the folder and pad. She stares at you and Javier with unreadable eyes, a thick wall of distance brought about by exhaustion and concern. A house of cards straining to hold up bricks. 

“Go home. Eat. Shower. Sleep. As much as you can because tomorrow we hit the ground running.” You nod while Javier just watches her go, but she stops by the door, Lurch already moving down the hall. “And off the record, your country thanks you for your service.” 

Your stomach knots and she leaves, her heels clacking as she goes.

“Ready to go home?” Javier’s eyes are dark, soft. He’s filthy and he holds his hand out to you. You stand without taking it. 

“Yes.”

By the time, Javi parks his Jeep against the curb, you can feel a bone-deep ache settling in. Exhaustion is so palpable in the air you can almost taste it. Given five more minutes, you would have dropped your forehead against the window and gone to sleep. But you fought it. You drove back the aches and the dreams and the steady pull into a dark sleep because Javier was driving and if he is awake, so are you. 

The car engine shuts off, the air still warm from the heat outside, and Javi’s door opens and shuts. You fumble with the handle, pop it back, and almost stumble into the street. But he’s there. As if he had been coming around to get your door for you. 

You stumble down from his Jeep and his hands catch you around your shoulders, your waist. 

“Easy, easy,” he murmurs to a quiet street. This neighborhood in Botoga is empty this time of night, its residents asleep beneath blankets of darkness. His thumb rubs your waist once before letting go. You’re somehow upright and steady. His hand on your shoulder remains, grounding you, centering the unstable universe. “Can you walk?” 

You nod and your eyes fall to his hand on your shoulder, so he lets you go. He watches you take two steps, then go up into the apartment building. He’s always close by, a shadow you could never lose. 

He’s somehow even closer, more insistent, more there when you climb the stairs to your shared apartment on the second floor. If you breathe wrong, his hand will shoot out and snatch away whatever is causing you harm. You hear the jingle of keys behind you and you realize your purse is gone.

In the midnight blue hallway, it’s like he can see your thoughts as they cross over your eyes. He’s using his own key to unlock the door. “Everything recovered was taken in as evidence. Everything from the car and everything that was found. We can get it back tomorrow. I’ll talk to Noonan personally.” 

What makes you so special with Noonan, you want to say. But you can just picture your keys and purse and everything you held important to you sitting exposed in the evidence locker for anyone to rifle through. 

He pauses, as if expecting something from you, but when given only silence, he nudges open the apartment door with his shoulder and the familiar smell of home greets you in your time of need. It smells like the chilaquiles you made last week. It was Javier’s birthday and you didn’t forget and the look on his face when he walked in and instantly recognized the taste of home and –

He stands by the couch, taking up too much room, quietly thinking, the keys still in his hand. He’s so fucking broad.

With a sigh, he tosses the keys onto the coffee table and they clatter against the glass, the sound loud and ringing in the silence. 

That heady mixture of fatigue and exhaustion slowly peels back from your brain like water receding from the sand when he tugs that filthy ruined shirt out of his waistband. He scratches the back of his head like he’s trying to knock a thought loose before pinching his eyes. With a huff, as though frustrated, he finally looks at you.

“You wanna take the first shower?” His voice is rough, attached to the back of a truck and spun in gravely circles. 

  It takes you a minute to realize he’s talking to you.

“Oh, I was, I was just going to go to sleep,” you say honestly. “Just pass out, face first, you know.”

You smile, hoping that might relieve the tension that’s winding up in his shoulders like a batter taking aim. But it doesn’t. In the dark, you can’t quite make out the expression in his eyes. But you do see the whites, like searchlights, seeking you out in the smoke.

“Don’t let it sit with you. Don’t . . . hold onto it.” You think you might know the “it” he’s talking about but you aren’t sure. But his tone lessens as he continues, “just at least rinse off. I wanna check your bandages before we go to sleep.” 

The thought of Javier peeling back anything on you leaves you almost rooted to the spot. You want to move but you can’t. There’s a slow, expanding heat starting in your lower stomach, but you won’t acknowledge it. Won’t look at it directly. What the fuck is wrong with you? 

“Javier–,” his name is strangled in your throat, this entire night living somewhere between your memories and your windpipe. 

He’s over to you in a second, hands clutching your elbows, are you hurt, are you here – I can’t find you –

“What? What do you need? Do you need me to help you?” 

“Help?” Your voice is barely a whisper. You wonder if you press your thumb to the hollow of his throat, if your skin would come back gray and dirty, and there’d be a clear spot over his skin. His chest fills your vision.

“Yes. Do you need help getting into the shower?” 

Jesus Christ, I miss pussy.

The memory is so suddenly clear and loud and invasive you feel like you’ve slapped with the strength of it. You jerk out of his arms, scowling. 

“No. No. It’s not that.” You physically lift your arm to keep him back. “No. I’m . . . just make sure the front door’s locked, okay? I’ll be out of the shower . . . in a minute . . .”

You stagger backwards and his nostrils flare, teeth grinding in his jaw, and his eyes carry the ache you feel in your bones. 

“You’re in shock. Let me help you –,”

“I’m fine. Just winded.” Turning away from him, your fingers brush the wall to guide you in the etched darkness, the lines of things just barely visible. You slide out of your shoes as you go, unbuttoning your pants and not caring if he follows.

“Can I help you into the shower?”

“No.”

“Can I wait outside?”

“No.” 

“Can I sit outside the door, with it open just a crack? In case you fall.”

The fact that that was a mere possibility ran you cold. You pause with your hand on the bathroom door, the zipper of your pants undone. He’s a shadow in the dark apartment, neither one of you reaching for the lights, but you know he’s concerned, coming from a place of care, not condescension, or ire, or disgust. Something about tonight scared the shit out of him. 

You nod, allowing this one transgression, and go in before you see him move. As per his request, you leave a small crack in the door and then brace yourself for the light switch. You squint against the bright blaze, the pounding in your head flaring for a second as you slowly open one eye, then two, and your vision adjusts. You meet your gaze in the mirror and gasp.

“What? What is it?” His voice is panicked and you know if you don’t answer in a way that satisfies him, he’s going to break the door down. 

“I’m fine, Javi. I’m just . . . I just saw myself in the mirror and I look like I’ve been run over by a semi-truck.”

Silence. “It’s not as bad as you think,” he says simply. You can almost picture him huddled up by the door, not daring to step into the strip of light. “A lot of it is swelling and that’ll go down soon. Give a day or two.”

That’s not really what you meant, but the sentiment from him is overwhelming and for the second time tonight, you struggle to find your voice. 

“G-g-good to know.” 

You smother his response by turning on the water behind you. 

Hot. Scalding hot. You want to disintegrate into the steam. With your belligerent guardian hovering nearby, you unbutton your shirt and ease your jeans off down your hips. Everything was unsalvageable. You wonder if you could get a reimbursement for clothes caught in the crossfire, remembering the story Steve told you about the time Javi got his cash bribery to a cop paid back in full by the DEA. 

Despite the things you said to him in the car, and despite what you know about him, you know he’s not eyeing you through the crack. He would never. 

I wouldn’t brag about you to anyone, even if you lost. 

And I especially would never if you let me fuck you.

That heat blooms in you again and you quickly shuck off your underwear. The steam is overwhelming, soothing the singed insides of your lungs with a wet compress. You step under the water and bite back a gasp. Fucking Jesus, it hurts. It burns, but it feels like it’s stripping off layers and layers of dirt and grime and destruction and smoke and chaos and holy shit, you almost died –

“Javi.” His name is in your mouth before you can stop it. It’s so heavy there, you can almost taste it.

“Yeah?” He responds instantly, cautiously. 

“Uh, nothing. Sorry. I was just . . . just making sure you were awake out there.” 

“I’m still here.”

He sees through your bullshit so fast it makes you flinch in anger. You scowl at the floor, focusing on watching the gray water rush down the drain. You struggle to fully wash your hair – the bandages around your palms are completely soaked but don’t come off easily – and when you go to rub soap on yourself, you pass over your hips and hiss.

Yep, bruises. Purple ones the size of your fist, up your left side, and by your ribs. You remember waking up sideways, the blast having launched you off your feet and into the road. You were grateful you didn’t knock your head against anything permanent. And lucky nothing got pierced, shattered, or snapped in two. Or crushed or bent or displaced. Two bombs and you get to go home to your bed and sleep.

And so does Javi.

Even just imagining that Javi wouldn’t make it home ran a shudder through your body so painful, the water shooting out of the shower head could have been ice cold. But the images in your mind grow and distort, his eyes wide open and no life within, his body too mangled for identification, your consciousness and his separated forever or maybe lost together in the same snarling black pit of endless nothing – tears spring into your eyes so fast it hurts as sharpness clogs your throat. 

God, you came so fucking close to dying and all this petty bullshit that you’ve dragged him through just because you didn’t want to seem incapable, when in fact, he thought you were the most talented agent he’s ever seen – why the fuck are you doing this to him? The intensity in your chest swells but you beat it back, beat it down, as you wrangle back your belligerent emotions into the box where they belong. No, fuck, that’s stupid. He’s fine. You’re fine. This is what you trained for. You cannot afford to lose it now. This is standard operating procedure. He’s not crying so neither should you. Buck the fuck up. 

You stand there for a full minute, every muscle in your body locked to steady yourself, mouth twisted down, hands fisted, thighs clenched, thighs locking up at the memory of him, of his promises, of the line you nearly crossed before it all went to hell.

Just fucking relax and let me take you apart.

You release, eyes open, mouth apart with a gasp. Fuck, this is so fucked up. You wanted Javi alive and breathing, to annoy every day, and to rail you within an inch of your life.

I’d make it good. I’d make it so fucking good, I swear.

He is just outside that door. Just waiting for you to say the word. 

No. He didn’t go running into the next open bed just because he was sad or some shit. Sad or scared or whatever. No, you aren’t going to be that pathetic, no matter how badly you throb, no matter how much you ache, no matter how much you already know that your fingers won’t be enough – and you can’t even use them. Hissing from the hot water on your skin and the frustration that grows between your legs, you carefully, gingerly, knowing full well what would happen if you made any sort of unusual sound, stepped out of the bathtub and took a towel down from the shelf. You wrapped it around yourself, your skin warm and smarting, but no longer aching. 

The door hadn’t moved an inch. 

You brush your hair a few times out of habit more than anything else and squeegee it until it's no longer dripping. Now to face him. You knock on the door, feeling as though you should respect this boundary you made on both sides. 

“Uh, Javi,” your chest won’t let you forget you were near tears, or the three-hundred-and-sixty-degree turn that insatiable animal between your legs decided to make. You try again, firmer. “Javier, I’m done.”

“Do you want me to leave so you can go to the bedroom?”

Leave? Why would you want him to leave the apartment?

No. He’s asking if you don’t want him to see you in a towel. You can almost picture his broad hand on the other handle. A phantom over your own.

“N-n-no. It’s fine. I’ll just – I’ll just come out.” 

You pull back the door and he’s there against the door frame, his broad shoulders turned away from you like someone left the paddock door open and all you have to do is run, run free, run away –

“Thanks,” you murmur, not meeting his eyes as you slide past him. You don’t even fault him if he looks at your ass, but you make it to the bedroom. The bathroom door clicks shut behind you and your lungs release a pent-up breath. 

He was fucking right. Getting it off you does make it better. 

From your dresser, you grab just some underwear and your older brother’s old college t-shirt. It comes to your midthigh and that’s exactly what you need right now. You don’t want anything thick on you. The smell is comforting in a way you can’t describe and you inhale as all the tension eases from your body. 

You drop your towel over the handle of the closet, in which Javi had somehow managed to find space for his many collared shirts despite you swearing there was not an inch of room for him, when you see something on the floor by the dresser. Call it delusion from the events of the night, but you don’t recognize it for what it is until you pick it up . . . and immediately drop it when the realization hits you like a ton of bricks.

It’s a rag, one you both (horrifyingly) use to wash your face, and it’s stiff on the inside. Not full, but hardened. Vaguely you can still hear the shower running as you contemplate what this means. For all the shit you give him, you really didn’t think he would cheat and not fess up. No, this wasn’t him consciously cheating – the rag was too casually discarded for this to be considered evidence. This is something else. 

All of this – the bet, the rules, the fact that you actually included wet dreams – you decided on!

Twice now I’m pretty sure I’ve gone blind in one eye, listening to all that and not being able to do a goddamn thing about it.

This is . . . your freebie. 

Your face warms, your fingers flexing around the edge of your t-shirt. Holy shit. Wet dreams. Nocturnal emissions. Holy shit.

Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit. 

The shower turns off just as the warm rushes between your legs, unrestrained and unrestricted. You swear your mouth waters at the thought that you might find an ounce of relief, tonight. Even soon. Your thighs quiver. 

The bathroom door opens and you all but launch yourself under the covers. Your fingers are between your thighs before you can stop them, just there, a reminder of relief and you fight off a shiver. The respect he gave you slips into your mind the second before he rounds the corner into the bedroom and you snap your eyes shut, the covers to your chin. 

He moves in silence, but the things around him do not. The floor cracks where he walks. The dresser drawer groans as he opens them and shuts them. You think you hear the rustle of a towel falling, then fabric moving on skin, and the floor squeaks in protest as he walks back out of the room. 

You breathe out, the air hacked up and choppy as though through between blades. You take your fingers from between your legs, but the stickiness in your underwear remains, just as it has been for a month and a half now. You might be berating yourself – what kind of fucked up were you that this is your reaction to a near-death experience? – if the light at the end of the tunnel wasn’t so bright. You could take off that searing, serrated edge that’s kept you from sleeping well, from dreaming, remove your brain from the hot plate it's been sizzling in for a month and a half. You try desperately not to imagine Javi entirely naked as he moves about the room, but you can’t help it, not now that you’ve given yourself permission to marinate in those feelings, in that heat. Oh God, please can’t he just go to bed?

There’s a click and suddenly light blooms behind your eyelids. You squint open one eye to see him coming towards you with a medical kit in his hands. 

“I know you’re awake. Sit up and let me dress your hands.” 

The white gauze was damp and soggy from the shower, but you hadn’t really noticed. He sits down, just beyond where your toes are covered by your blanket, and sighs. 

“C’mon. Faster you do this, the faster we can go to sleep.” 

“Or we could just not. Just go to sleep now.” Just go over there. All the way over there. The bed sinks where he adjusts on your mattress and you swear you can feel his body heat through the covers. You bite your lip and force that whimper back down your throat. 

“It’ll get infected.” He taps your thigh under the comforter. “C’mon.”

You sit up but don’t give him your hands. He’s turned on the lamp light between your two beds, not the overhead light, and it blurs all the lines of his shoulders, his jaw, his hair. His white shirt is warmly golden and you realize you had been hoping he wasn’t wearing one. He still hasn’t looked up at you. Maybe he really is irritated that he’s not asleep yet, which you marvel at – you won’t be able to fall asleep for hours, even if you weren’t low throbbing between your legs. With a sigh that’s more practice than sincerity, you stick out your palms. The gauze and tape no longer sit right over your skin and you can now see the pink skin beneath it. 

Javi makes a noise in the back of his throat before digging around in the med kit for something. He pulls out a small pair of scissors and starts cutting back the gauze. 

“I could do this myself, you know.” It’s petulant and bratty but you didn’t think Javier Peña was capable of the delicate touch with which he holds your hand steady. 

“I know,” he says. “I wanted to do it for you.” 

It is painfully obvious that you absolutely could not do this unassisted but for the life of you, you can’t imagine why he’s humoring you. You watch him as he methodically cuts through the wet gauze, inordinately careful not to catch or drag the material. He cuts down between your third and fourth knuckle on both hands, and eases the gauze away.

Exposed to the open air, the wounds on the heels of your palms sting and you hiss. Javi, who just had his head in the kit, snaps his head up to you.

“Don’t–,”

But it’s too late, you’ve already turned over your hands. Angry, red, pulsing gashes, some so deep you can see muscle, sit in matching places at the bottom of your hands. Presumably, when you were thrown, you reached out to catch yourself and your hands and hips got the brunt of the impact. But your hips had your jeans over them while your hands had nothing.

“You don’t need stitches.” Javi’s gaze is heavy, his voice low. His hands loosely hold the new roll of gauze and tape. He looks like he’s bracing himself, that he’s worried you’re about to yell at him. “I checked with the EMTs. You don’t need stitches.” 

“Oh.” You won’t be able to properly close your hands for months. 

“They don’t think–,” his voice catches. “They don’t think it’ll scar either. Maybe a bit, but not so much that –,”

“Where were you?” Your question isn’t accusatory, but curious. You look up at him and he flinches. “I don’t see anything on you.” 

“You were closer.” The room is thick with his solemnity. “You were covering my right and I,” he swallows, his eyes fixated on your bloody hands, “I should have seen it coming.”

“Bullshit, Javi. No one could have seen that coming. No one could have stopped it.” His nostrils flare again and he not-too-gently takes your hand with his fingers. Your wrist looks so small in comparison to his fingers. He unwinds the gauze around your palm, and wraps it up against your wrist, securing it with tape, his movements tight and short. There’s real rage in his eyes.

“Yes, I could have.”

His fucking ego. It scratches against you until you feel your skin catch fire. You want to snatch back your other hand, but he’s insistent, not rough, but boasting no room for negotiation. “There’s nothing you could have done, you idiot. You’re not actually Superman.” 

He grinds his teeth. “I should have just done my fucking job.” 

There’s only so much you can take. This fucking man.

You snatch your hand back from him the instant the tape seals the gauze. 

“You’re fucking ridiculous, you know that?” His shoulders are lined with tension. You want to kick him off your bed. His fingers dig into your mattress. “You fucking follow me around like I’m liable to break apart and then you go and pull this shit.”

“What shit?” He growls as he angrily packs up the kit and drops it on the floor.

“This! This tough guy, I’m-fucking-invincible, John-Wayne bullshit. We were both there, Javier. Both of us were in the crossfire of not one, but two explosions tonight. So don’t act like I’m the only one upset. Don’t act like this didn’t affect you.” 

He goes still. His nails freeze in their excavation of your bedsheets, his shoulders hunched like he’s straining under some immense pressure. Just as you’re about to lift your eyes to find his, he stands – and moves closer to your end of the bed. You flinch, react, because this is not at all what you were expecting from him, and you pull your knees to your chest. 

His hand hovers over your knee. 

He’s so broad he eclipses the light until he’s all you see. There’s a twitch in his jaw and finally his hand settles down. His thumb rubs your skin once, as if to confirm you’re there. 

For the first time in your partnership, his face is unreadable to you. His gaze is dark, stormy, raging, but the corners of his mouth are pulled down and his breathing is sharp. His swallow unsticks his jaw from his upper teeth.

“I thought I lost you today.” His voice is firm. Solid. Unwavering. It had been building up against his teeth, around the soft palate of his tongue. It sat in his mouth and waited for its turn. His confession makes him braver. He sits, closer to you than he was in the car, closer to you than he’s ever been. He watches his hand on your knee. How close it is to your thigh. How easy it would be to slide down to your hip. And then he shakes his head, as though physically fighting back sleep. “Don’t ask me to talk about it. Okay? I can’t. Don’t ask me about it.” 

You can almost feel his gravitational pull. But you resist. You always resist.

It can’t be this easy for him. You can’t be this willing. You cannot be some stupid skirt for him or anyone to throw around.

“You told Noonan this was my first bombing, that I was in shock.” 

“You were. That’s why you don’t remember what happened clearly,” he says gently, no condescension, “it’ll come to you, in a few days. You just need time to process it.” He speaks from experience and it makes you so angry. He breathes out his nose and his hand retreats, sliding back down your calf, his fingers wrapping around your ankle as if you intended to fly away and he wasn’t going to let you.

“But then why did you make it sound like I couldn’t handle it?” It’s not in your imagination when his eyes go dark, mouth flatting, when he sees you just have underwear on underneath your shirt. You watch him as his eyelids fall heavy and his head turns, just a bit. 

What the fuck is wrong with you? No –

What the fuck is wrong with him?

“It has nothing to do with you,” he says softly, his gaze riding back up your knee, as slow and as steady as his hand. He stops in his touchless-roving of you and looks you in your eye. Now this look . . . this look you know. It was the same one he wore when he told you he wanted to ruin other people for you. “I’ve seen fully grown men curl up into a ball after experiencing what you went through. It was horrific. People died. There’s a natural reaction to these things. You’re only human.” 

It’s a sentiment that disgusts you. 

“And it’ll come to me too.” Javier admits. The words ring in the air, hovering, crawling into your ears, down your throat and taking root into your heart. Eyes never leaving your face, he suddenly comes forward, hand going across your hip, drawing his body over yours as you lean back as far as the headboard will let you go, but his broad shoulders have you pinned. You swallow a whimper in your throat. His head turns, and the electrons between the tip of his nose and your skin crackle. His breath is less close than he is. “It’ll come for me. I know it will.” He sighs as if your scent is soothing, “do you want me to help you forget?” 

Just his gaze has you in a stranglehold. If you move a muscle, you’ll touch him. The tendons in his forearms flex on both sides. 

“I-I-I want– I want–,” 

“Tell me, baby, tell me what you want.” His voice is honey smooth, glazed with sparks and fireworks. He says one thing when he means, let me kiss you. 

His nose drags down your throat, inhaling as if to savor, and he plants one chaste kiss on your collar bone, lets his lips linger. He’s tasting you for the first time. “What were you going to say? Do you need a reminder?” As quick and as hot as lightning, his hand leaves the mattress, eases around the back of your thigh and he presses his knuckles into the wet clutch of your underwear. He punches out a quiet groan as your breathing stutters – fuck, how did he know? “She seems to remember me pretty well. Remembers how I made her feel.” 

You snag him by the wrist, your other elbow quaking, your breathing small and tight. This is it, this is how it all ends. You look him in the eye, knowing whatever is rapidly expanding in your chest has made it into your gaze, into the set of your jaw, and Javi looks like he wants to drink whatever’s in your mouth right out of your lips.

“I found the rag.” 

Tonight’s full of firsts, it seems; Javier Pena fucking blushes. 

“That wasn’t– I was sleeping, that doesn’t count. I can’t control it.” 

Your breathing hitches, victory squeezing your lungs. 

“F-f-fine,” you murmur. Slowly, you push his fingers back into your wet panties. You think you might melt from the intensity of his stare alone, “but I want a f-f-freebie too.”

You watch as Javi’s irises plunge into darkness. 

“You want me to make you come, and it won’t count? The bet’s still on?” 

You nod, frantically, rolling your hips against his fingers and he hisses, yanking back from you. 

“Fucking finally. But we’re doing this my way.”

“What do you–,”

Snagging you by the hips, he twists you perpendicular to the bed as he sinks to his knees on the floor. Your heart is pounding in your throat as you watch him toss your knees over his shoulders, eyes fixated on that wet spot on your crotch.

“Javi, what the fuck are you doing?”

“Bed’s too small,” he murmurs, licking his lips, still focused on you. “Can’t stretch out with the dresser. Knees are gonna fucking kill me but . . .”

As though called, Javi drops his head and kisses where your clit would be over your underwear. All strength is suddenly zapped from your elbows and you flop back, the sound of his corresponding groan forever imprinted on your hips.

“Oh, fuck, Javi, what are you–,” 

His fingers curve around the waistband of your underwear and with his nose hovering just over where the waistline sits, he tugs, over one leg and then the other. You feel his breath warm over the dampness in the thatch of your curls and you cannot fight the noise that breaks out of your chest. Your fingers dive into his hair and he hasn’t even touched you. 

“Just the one, right?” He licks the inside of your thigh and you arch, just a bit. God, you are so oversensitive and it’s fucking embarrasing – but it’s been so goddamn, fucking long and it’s him.  

“Y-y-yes, just, just the one.”

He surges forward, mutters something that sounds like, “we’ll see”, and licks the entire length of your slit. 

He is relentless. He is relentless and talented and so very, very, very eager –

Head thrown back, you press your shoulders into the mattress as he licks the slick from your cunt, washing your clit with his spit and your slick. He plays there, twisting and swirling, and just at the peak of pleasure, he sinks two fingers into you and a moan rockets out of you. 

“JaviJaviJavi–,”

His responding moan sends shivers across your skin as he opens his jaw wider to lick you even deeper. He shifts attention, focuses on your fluttering cunt while his thumb makes laps around that sweet bundle of nerves. With every heartbeat, you can feel his hands, his tongue, the tip of his nose, flush with your slick. It’s like he’s bleeding you dry, wringing every bit of pleasure from you while he still can. 

His fingers pump hard and fast without warning and you jolt, thighs tensing, sending a crackle down your spine that thrusts your hips into his face. Oh god, they are so much bigger than your own fingers. Oh god, he’s right. Oh god, oh god, oh god –

 The white-knuckled terror of what happened tonight snaps in half as your back arches against his chest. You can feel the hold it had on you crack as he beckons you forward, beckons you back to that knife-edge of relief, as he drags you out of this broken, horrified shell. How did he know exactly what you needed? That coil springs red hot and tight, pleasure rocketing between your legs and up your spine. 

“Worst thought I had all night was that I’d never get back inside this sweet pussy,” he mutters into your thigh. He doesn’t even ask when he adds a third finger, his other hand ridiculously stroking under your knee, as if you’d ever be calm, ever be rational again. 

“Do you hear that, baby? She’s crying for me. She missed me so much,” he grunts directly into your sopping wet pussy. He groans at the sound. Eyes fluttering, he drops his head and licks around your clit again, his wrist snapping against you so roughly you bounce up the mattress.  

Goddamn it, Javier. 

Your core starts to flutter, this orgasm that has been mounting for weeks every time you look at him roaring down on you. It's the one from the car that’s been lurking just out of sight. It’s the one from when you sat on the toilet as he paraded around topless, so consumed with hatred and blind lust you couldn’t move. It’s the one that sparked out, unwanted and unbidden when he smirked at you over his desk, and said, “fine, I’ll take your fucking bet.”

Your nails scratch at his head, fingers knotting his hair, that enormous, crushing orgasm just out of reach, with every muscle in your body extended out to reach it – if you could just get a finger on it –

“You come for me, now. Only me.” His gaze is transfixed on you, mouth, chin, cheeks shining in the low light, but the blazing in his eyes has a direct line to the white-lighting thundering behind the thrust of his fingers. Your eyes roll back in your head as he flicks his wrist faster, the precision of his thumb on your clit mind-numbing. 

“Oh, Javi, Jesus Christ, I—,”

“Just let me take you apart.”

He curls his fingers, and sucks on your clit hard. 

You’re launched. 

Launched off the ground. Into the stratosphere. White noise, propelling you higher and higher, static where your limbs should be. 

There’s the height, the peak, the intensity almost burning out your nerve-endings to numbness, you’re pretty sure you’ve stopped breathing, toes curled against his back, heels digging into his spine –

– and then –

– and then –

He french-kisses your cunt and you slam back down so hard you curl inwards. It knocks you flat back against the mattress, your fingers ooze away from the crown of his head and flop against your stomach. You do not possess the willpower or ability to open your eyes. The warmth between your legs settles, purrs, satiated.  

“J-Javi,” you try and speak through a completely dry mouth. “J-Javi, come here.” 

He grunts, uh-uh, and slowly, as feeling returns to your legs, you feel his hands around your hips, fingers pulling you down, down into his open mouth where he’s still –

You whimper, that simmer ticking up again. There is no energy left inside of you to stop him, and you don’t want to. Not really. Not when he’s rocking you smoothly, gently with three fingers, through your first high and leading you towards another. He twists his wrist, middle finger brushing you yourself could never quite reach and your hips buck up, wavering on the edged line between pain and pleasure. He presses a wet, salty kiss into your hip bone, keeping you still. 

Your own breathing seems to set you off, as if any movement at all is liable to heat that spark, make you clench tighter and tighter on his fingers. “Javi, please – it’s only-only supposed to be the o-one–,” 

He groans, rubbing his forehead against you as his fingers plug you up again and again. He licks a patch of skin just below your hip bone and you shiver. 

  “You come for me when I tell you to come,” he tongues your clit and you twist, not entirely overstimulation, but god it makes you ache. “You come, you frustrating hermosita, and you let me give you as many orgasms as I want and you forget this stupid fucking bet–,” 

Your trembling thigh pulls out of his grasp, heel digging into his shoulder, and with a jerk you pry him off you, out of you, and your second orgasm is wrenched away from you so fast, you actually black out for a second. You kick out, gasping in shock and agony, and he falls back on his ass on the floor. But you were too close, on the heels of what quite possibility was the biggest orgasm of your life, too sensitive and freshly fucked. A gyroscope of blinding heat and pulsing wet, you’re oscillating between pain and pleasure, and you clamp your legs shut, hand springing to your mouth. This is it, this is the moment you cry, the moment you break down. You can’t take it anymore. Not after a month, not after all this time as his partner, not after almost dying–  

You feel like your body is actively rebelling against you, punishing you for being so fucking stupid. 

And you know you’re being stupid too, but it's a reaction. It’s an instinct at this point – self-preservation above all else. Groaning, you roll onto your side, trying to breathe through it, trying to swallow it all down – but your thighs – they’re sticky, and wet, and you can feel your slick all the way down to the curve of your ass – and it makes you just –

“I knew I shouldn’t have mentioned the bet,” and he laughs. Easy, a little disbelieving, but not angry. You wrench your eyes open, mustering all that throbbing into a glare that you hope burns his skin. He’s climbed into the far end of the bed, leaning back against the dresser at the foot of your bed, thick cock fully tenting his shorts, but looking so smug you want to kick him again. You weakly bat at his ankle with your toe.

“Y-you . . . shut the fuck up,” you groan, your thighs quavering. You gulp down air, seeing

the other side of it, but it’s not going away fast enough. 

He sighs, adjusting himself in his pants, but not trying to hide in the slightest. “Stop squeezing. You’re making it worse.” 

“What?” you pant. 

Javi wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, eyes dark, then lifts his hands, a universal white-flag, and he gently takes your ankle, pulling it back across the mattress. It spreads your legs, the cold air in the room against your overripe and exposed cunt almost tickling, but the pressure lessens, eases. You might have been embarrassed to be so completely exposed to him but you stopped worrying about dignity a long time ago. 

“Relax. And breathe.” 

You throw your crossed wrists over your forehead, sucking in lungfuls of air, as he slowly parts your thighs as they finally stop shaking. Inhaling, exhaling, you bury the sensation until it isn’t overwhelming anymore. He gently thumbs your ankle.  

“There you go. You did it . . . whatever it is you’re trying to do.” You open your eyes to his smile, no longer smug, but a little delirious. He shakes his head, laughing a bit as he looks at the ceiling. “Do you feel better?”

You scowl at him and haul yourself to the other end of the bed, closing your legs that have completely turned to jelly. You curl away from him. 

“No, you fucking asshat, I don’t feel better.” You eye his still-tented pants. “Do you?” 

He sighs, a fraction of his control slipping, and he traces mustache with his forefinger and thumb. 

“Not particularly.” He watches your ankles move on the blankets with interest, gaze hardening as it curves over your thigh. “So what’s your next move? What’s your plan?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“You’re just going to deny yourself, forever?”

“No, just until you come first. Then, fuck, I think I’m going to join a swingers club.”

“Not funny.” 

“It is if you’re me.”

His cock is softening, easing back down, and he sulkily rubs himself. The hum between your legs has finally gone to sleep. You could turn your foot and brush his calf. This bed is definitely not meant to hold two fully grown adults. 

You can tell he’s itching for a cigarette. 

“Why do you want to win so much?” He crosses his arms, contemplative instead of sour. “I mean, you prove to them that you have more willpower than the rest of the building combined and every man at the DEA knows not to fuck with you. But then what? What do you get then?”

You push back with your shoulders, turning so that you’re facing him, your foot now near his knee. There’s a birthmark on his left inner thigh you’ve never seen before. Never before has anyone tried so hard to understand you. 

“Peace,” you answer, the answer coming to you immediately. “Quiet. I can finally do my job without worrying about some mouth-breather taking a photo up my skirt.” 

His eyes darken, an unsettling rage sparking to life. “Did someone actually do that to you?”

You pick at a thread on your shirt. “It’s none of your concern. And if it did, you don’t have to worry because I fucking launched his camera out the third story window.”

“Good. But I want you to tell me who it was.”

“No.”

“Why?” 

“Because I don’t need you to fight my battles.”

“What if this was just for me? What if I don’t want to work with a fucking asshole who takes pictures of my female colleagues? What if I’ve had a shitty month and a half and I want to kick someone ass, huh?”

You sit up a little straighter, his diatribe flushing something warm inside you. He shakes his head, but you can see his gears turning about how to sneak employee records from the old lady in HR. But he brings himself back to the moment, to you.

“Okay, so peace, quiet. Fucking dead men who take pictures up your skirt. What now?”

“Now I live uninterrupted. My work is judged on its merit not what’s between my legs. I’m finally left alone.”

“Alone? Isn’t that . . . well, lonely?” 

“Doesn’t matter when you’re queen of the mountain,” you smile. And that’s what you always believed. That was the goal. That was the end. Whatever you had to crawl your way through, whatever monstrous form your ambition took, there was always the mountain. 

Javi chews on the skin behind his bottom lip as he looks at you. If there ever comes a time when he’s not frowning at you, there’s something probably very wrong. 

And then he turns his head, as if seeing a light in the distance. 

“So you’re queen of the mountain top. Ice queen, frost witch, all alone.”

Something in his voice tears at a vulnerable place inside you. “Javier, don’t. Just drop it, okay?”

“All alone and no one to call you a monster. What was your phrasing, a nagging bitch?” 

“Get off my bed, Javier. Right now. Get out.”

“If I make you come first, I’ll tell everyone I went first.” His brown eyes catch the lamplight and burn gold for an instant.

You tuck your legs underneath you, your heart rate doubling. He’s cutting a line through your emotions, jerking you back and forth between anger, sadness, embarrassment, fear — you’d swear he was using a scalpel. 

“Why is it so fucking important to you that I get off?” You snap. “Why do you want to be the one to do it? Why did you t-touch me like that? Why do you care?”

He moves quicker than he has all night, probably now that he knows you can’t out run him. That you don’t actually want to. You want him to catch you every single time. Javi crawls forward, follows your legs up to your chest, and cages you between his thighs. Your feet slid under the space between his calves and the mattress. 

He’s not trying to crowd you, not trying to intimidate you. But he does want you to be overwhelmed by him. To let only him exist in your mind. 

Gently, but this time because he wants to savor every delicious second, he takes your hand again and kisses your wrist, eyes closed. 

“Cariño,” he murmurs in his native language and it’s like someone dropped a bucket between your legs. Your cunt bottoms out at that single word. His other hand scoops down around your waist, encouraging you forward, and of course you go willingly, until you’ve got your thighs around his hips and your head tucked into the curve of his neck. He breathes deep . . . And he holds you. Just holds you. 

It’s so raw you’re trembling. 

He lifts the collar of your shirt and presses his lips to your skin. 

“Te han lastimado antes. No otra vez. No conmigo.” He puts his forehead against your temple. “You know exactly why I care. I thought it was obvious when I nearly lost my goddamn mind in the street tonight. I couldn’t find you in the smoke. I knew I was being too obvious, but I couldn’t care. It was written all over my face.” 

He’s plucking back your exposed wiring, to the meat of you. To the fleshy tender bits. The thing you always feared the most.

And yet, with him, it doesn’t hurt. It doesn’t feel like you’re losing, when he discovers your secrets. When he learns the truth of you. And more importantly, he doesn’t flinch away. 

That’s quite literally never happened before. 

Tears flood your eyes before you can stop them and you bury your face in his throat. You’ve gotten very good at silent crying but a single breath and he has his broad hands rubbing up and down your spine. 

“I think even Noonan knows. But what’s she gonna do?” He snorts, characteristically cavalier about his career in the face of what he finds most important. 

You feel very small against his chest, a position you never wanted to be in your most terrifying nightmares. 

  But looking back, there’s a lot you would tell your past self.

You lift your head, not trying to hide your tears as you gaze up at him. “Noonan knows what, Javi?” 

His smile is sad, still disbelieving, but warm. Gentle. Loving. It pricks at your heart. 

“Ask me again in the morning, baby. Okay? Pregúntame entonces.” 

You nod and he wipes back the streaks of tears with his thumbs. 

“Can I please make you come now?” 

You swallow, that heat sparking from his hands on your cheeks, down your spine, and into the very center of you. 

“Okay.” 

You reach forward and cup the back of his head, fingers twisting into his hair, and you realize this is the first time you've ever touched him like this. You sniffle. 

“Okay, Peña. Do your worst.”

He snorts. “It’s not supposed to feel like ripping off a bandaid.” 

Logically, you don’t disagree. But . . . 

“I know.” 

Do you?

His eyes search your face, his hand on your cheek almost firm as if inspecting you. “We’ll come at the same time, alright? No winners, no losers, just us.” 

You nod frantically, eyes tracing his lips, his nose, his chin. “Yeah. Just us. Just us, Javi.”

“Only us,” he murmurs breathily, gaze locked onto your mouth, and your hands tighten around the back of his neck. Shifting more into his knees, his fingers tug at his shorts, dragging them down over his hips and once you realize what he’s doing, your pulse instantly skyrockets. 

His waistband slips down and his cocks springs free, tapping against your thigh and it’s suddenly too real – his arm around you is crushing the wind out of you, but it’s not enough and too much. Is that what was in his jeans? Is that what he rubbed up against the steering wheel over and over again?

“I’m gonna do it right, I swear,” he promises your sternum as he knees out of his shorts. “I’m gonna eat your pussy for as long as you can take it, but I –,” 

His gaze flickers to your hand as you drop your shirt off the side of the bed and he stills for just a second. Then he looks back up at you, those dark brown pupils blown wide in lust and awe, and you feel the air sucked from your lungs. You are, in every sense of the word, naked in front of Javier Peña. 

“Fuck,” he murmurs, pulling you closer, pulling him on top of you, your nipples rubbing roughly against his shirt. He sucks two of his fingers into his mouth, to ready you, but you shake your head, the lack of oxygen in your brain making you slightly light-headed as if you’ve been tumbling down the side of a hill. 

“It’s fine, Javi, I just need – I want –,”

He nods because he understands you – he fucking sees you, he always, always had – and he lifts your thighs. His breath shortens in anticipation as he works your hips, your damp folds rubbing against his length. 

“I’m gonna – I’m gonna do it right, I s-swear –,”

Your nails dig into the back of his neck and he groans. 

“Javi, just do it now.” 

He settles you down and lets the weight of you take him in, inch by agonizing inch, up into your warm, dripping center. After almost two months of aching emptiness, the sudden burst of pleasure nearly knocks the wind out of you. 

“Oh, fuck,” the stretch is magnificent, ecstacy rippling through you, and you claw yourself closer to him. He grunts in your ear and his other hand latches onto the headboard.

“Ngh– fuck, I know.” 

He grip on your waist tightens, either fighting the urge to come or fuck up into you, as you sink down onto him. Your eyes flutter and you feel sweat spark out down your spine. Your hand lifts the back of his shirt and you press your palm into the small of his back.

“Take-take this off.” He complies, shifting you both and you open-mouth gasp at the change in pressure. He sags forward, his head on your shoulder, and his forearm binding you to him. His teeth nip at your skin.  

Nothing has ever felt this good. Nothing in your entire life.

God, he is going to ruin you.

“Javier, please move—,” 

He nods, and sits back. “Yeah – yeah, okay –,”

He rolls his hips once and fuck, you are never going to do this to yourself again. It’s not just that you haven’t had sex in almost two months but you had been teasing yourself around him, some primal part of your brain throwing a fit that you didn’t give into your baser instinct for him. It was him specifically that wound you tighter than a wet knot and now you are in danger of coming so hard and so fast from just a single thrust.

He shifts you more so your weight is more on top of him, pressing your low back closer, and finally he starts rolling his hips, dragging the length of him just enough out. You swear you can follow the line of your orgasm on the lines of his hips. 

“I just – I need to take the edge off–,” He confesses to your throat, in a low, wrecked voice. “Just a bit.” 

“I don’t care, Javi,” you squeeze your thighs and you can hear the headboard groan behind you. “Just move!” 

He bucks up into you, rougher, all in one go, giving himself over to your demands, to his own and starts hammering into your hips. It hurts, but fuck it feels good too. He sets a pace that has your mouth go slack, his hip bones rubbing right up against your clit over and over and over again, overheating every inch of your skin and making your mouth water. You think you feel him up in your cervix. 

“Fuck, why did we wait so long to do this?” he murmurs against your jaw. “Huh? Been living with you for a month – nghh – this’s what we could’ve been doing instead?”

You wrap your arms around his shoulders and pull your warm tits against his chest. He groans, and his fingers slip down to the bottom of your spine, one resting against the crack of your ass. 

“Month in a half–,” you correct him breathlessly. “‘ve had to watch you walk around topless in the morning . . . for a month and a half.” 

He releases something between a growl and a groan from his chest and he drops you a bit, angling his hips down, and you gasp at the angle. You lean back and scrape your nails down his chest. 

He drops his mouth open and sucks one of your nipples into his mouth, rolls it between his teeth, flicking it with his tongue. When you jolt, he seeks out the other one, nipping just hard enough it makes you gasp.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, Javi–,”

“You like that?” he smirks, his sideburns damp, “yeah, you do.”

You barely nod before he turns you both onto the bed, but he grabs your knees from his hips and splits them. Switching from that rough bounce, Javi grinds his cock deeper into you, brushing a place inside of you that flicks the heat like a lighter. You want to hold your legs open for him. 

“Can’t wait to see you come like this,” he grunts. His hand leaves your knee and starts to tease your clit again. You’re leaking into the mattress, your cunt fluttering as though electrified. “See you turn off that fucking gorgeous brain of yours. Maybe then you’ll be nice to me.” 

“Never.”

He smirks above you and you can’t help but grin back. 

“You’re such a tease, you know that?” His grinds are long, deep, allowing for the sound of your cunt sucking him in to punctuate the silence. 

“Only for you.” You want to take it back the second it's out of your mouth, but you can’t and he is . . . the expression on your face, it makes him bite down on his back molars. 

His eyes flutter and he rewards you with a swift rub on your clit. You shudder, feeling so full, you can barely form sentences, much less words.

“Yeah? Only me?” His damp hand leaves your clit and slides up your ribs, taking his time as he fucks you so deep, you’re going to feel it tomorrow in your guts. He cups the heavy flesh of your breast, and circles your nipple with his thumb. You arch into his touch and his mouth drops. “All this – just for me, baby?”

You squeeze him once, your fingers wrapped around his forearms, and his rhythm slips. “You fucking heard me the first time. Don’t stop.”

He slows, his irises jet black and wide, lust-blown. His sweaty chest heaving, droplets running down the back of his neck, he pins you to the mattress with just his gaze. His hips draw little figure eights and you fight to keep your eyes from rolling back, to force that oncoming orgasm at bay.

“Still with that mouth. That goddamn attitude.” 

You swallow, because oh god, you’ve really done it now. “Yeah. I remember something about fucking that attitude out of me.”

His head cocks to the side. His hands leave your knees, hovering as they tease the microscopic hairs on your skin, until he’s braced over you. You wrap your legs around his hips, bringing them down to you.

“Do you want that?” He husks, nose trailing over yours, then your mouth, your chin, as drops of sweat patter onto your neck, your chest. The Bogota heat is really unforgivable. You know you’re staining your sheets with multiple fluids. “You want me to fuck the attitude out of you?”

“A lady never repeats herself,” you mutter, your hands combing through his damp curls. “Javi, I’m so close, please. . .” One of those disbelieving eyebrows arch up. He doesn’t seem to hear you.

“A lady, huh? Well, I wouldn’t be a gentleman if I came first, so why don’t you just . . .” He unwinds one of your legs from his hips, balances it over his shoulder, and grinds down. Your snarky retort is lost to the recess of your brain and the tension flares within you, forcing a breathy moan out of your mouth. His gaze follows your nose as you arch back and come down. “There we go, just needed it right, huh?”

“Just–,” thrust, “a little–,” thrust, “attention–,”

“God, Javi–,” you cry out. 

His new pace is even more staggering than the last. At this angle, you feel like you’re being split up, carved out, taking him in until there’s more of him than you. His thrusts are just as deep as the last but harder, rougher, faster–

Oh, god, so fast, so, so, so fast–

He’s fucking you down into the mattress and you deliriously consider the sturdiness of this fucking twin bed. It squeaks and rocks.

“So fucking tight,” Javi mutters to himself more than you, his jaw locked. “So fucking good.” 

You’re right at the peak in a fraction of the time, your walls no longer fighting him. He groans deep as you start to flutter, start to come– when he stops – again.

“Javi,” the halting of your orgasm is officially painful, your stomach tight and your cunt clenching. And fuck, you’re crying. “Javi, please, please don’t stop. I’ll do anything. Anything you ask, but please, please let me come.”

  He half-chuckles, half-pants as he lifts your hips up and sets a pillow down under them. 

“When I said I was going to fuck you and make it good, I meant it. Besides,” he swings your other leg over his shoulder again, rocking over you and nearly splitting you in half. He fills you in a single, rough stroke and at the new angle, where he’s deeper than ever, and now the tears stream out the corner of your eyes as you gasp at the sensation. “I thought you said you didn’t want to come.” You whine, high-pitched and needy, as he drags all the way back out and plummets down again, making you feel every inch of him. You’re a sobbing mess when he does it again.

“Fuck, Javi, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, please keep doing that–,”

With little half-thrusts, he kisses your left temple, right over where the tears flowed into the sheets. 

“You did everything right tonight.” You split open your watery lashes to see him watching you. He looks about as wrecked as you feel, brow furrowed, cheeks pink. How does he fucking maintain control like this? “You’re doing everything right. You did so good. But let me do this. I want to – I’ve wanted, for s’long –,”

Your breathing stutters between the tears and his words. You can only nod, your bottom lip trembling, as Javi picks up his speed again, steady at first, then harder. He grunts with every stroke, like he’s trying to prove something. The slap of hips against yours is outrageous. Every thrust threatens to shatter the very center of you. Detonate something precious and vulnerable inside of you. 

“You’re close, aren’t you? God, I can feel it. I can fucking feel it.”

He thrusts down more, faster, like he’s chasing you, chasing your orgasm. He grits his teeth, neck muscles corded. He hitches your leg higher.

“C’mon, ba-by, that’s- it, that’s it– lemme fe-el it–,”

But you are seconds away and he’s still not there, still sprinting after you. So you do the only thing you can think of.

You lean up, your knee falling off his shoulder, and you kiss him. Hand clutching his neck, you kiss him with every last ounce of your awareness, of self-preservation, of fucking adoration because this man is the only creature on the planet with a willpower to match your own. And you fucking love it. 

He grunts and thrusts one more time and that’s it.

Your vision whites out, your thighs trembling, tension snapping, and sends you hurling over the edge. Both of you over the edge. You whine against his mouth, as he cock drives deep, deep within you one last time. You feel his warm ropey cum paint the inside of you, cock twitching, your walls rippling, sucking him dry, and his entire body sags down into you. You have to turn your head to breath, to gasp in air, oxygen flooding your brain, and he pants into your neck. His bicep trembles where he’s trying and failing to keep his weight off you. 

“Jesus, fuck–,” he mutters against your skin, the sweat on his forehead mixing with your own wet salt. He’s shaking above you, his pulse pounding so hard in his neck, you feel it on your skin. You wonder vaguely where he can feel your pulse. He takes a few more steadying breaths before lifting his head slightly.

“This isn’t how I usually do things after,” he pants between words, “but, uh, there is literally no room for me to roll off you.”

You laugh, the motion stealing precious air from you, you can feel your stomach expand against his, and he finally meets your gaze. You eye the embarrassing lack of space in this ridiculously tiny bed. 

“And here I thought you just wanted to cuddle.” This close, you feel the flush of his breath as he chuckles. “Here, lean up a second.” 

He groans, “mi jodida espalda. Creo que me desgarré un músculo,” but manages to get high enough for you to scoot to the edge of the bed and he dips his shoulder into the open space between you and the wall. Your bodies are so tightly pressed together, he manages to stay inside of you the whole time. 

With anyone else, you would have just gotten out of the bed. Moved away. You’ve never been one to linger after sex – either your partner was already asleep or you had better things to do – but Javi seemed intent on studying your face as his breathing slows and your heart rate eases. His softening cock slips out of you and you fight a groan at the sensation. He tucks his bicep under his head like a pillow. Sweat rolls over his tight muscle. 

“What? No post-cigarette sex?” You smirk to cover the rising blush on your cheeks, the longer he stares. “No slap on the ass, ‘wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am’?”

His face is expressionless when he asks, “is that what that was to you?”

You swallow, feeling a bit like you’re being scolded. “No, of course not, I just–,”

“Good. It wasn’t like that for me either.”

He cups the back of your head and brings you closer, closer than you possibly could be, and kisses your mouth, soft, easy, with a hint of tongue.

Something sickening like adoration claws through your chest because fuck, what if he doesn’t ever kiss you like that again? What are you going to do when he walks through the office doors coated in another woman’s perfume, his scent all over her and –

You break apart, hands on his chest. His brow furrows.

“What? What did you think about just now?”

Like he wants to know what’s going on inside your brain. 

“So we tied. What a great story that’ll be. I’m sure the office will laugh themselves silly on how we both won and lost at the same time–,” 

He says your name firmly, once, with his fingers wrapped tightly around your bicep. He cuts off your ramblings instantly.

“Stop,” he begs quietly. “Why are you talking like that, querida? What are you thinking about?”

His dark brown eyes are sad, hurt even. Why do you keep pulling away from me?

It’s been such a long night. It’s been such a long month. Year. You’ve been fighting for so, so long and all it takes is for him to knock at your door, and everything comes crashing down. You feel exposed, a live wire, a nerve rubbed raw – too much, Javi, too much – and tears rim your lashes before you can stop them. You shrug, the vice grip around your throat painful and choking. You shrug weakly, unable to meet his eyes.

“I’m just preparing myself for something funny to tell the bullpen when you walk in after you’ve fucked the secretary on the second floor. She’s been eying you for months and it wouldn’t be fair to deny her!” Your voice swings, high-pitched and pathetic on that last word, and you clamp your mouth shut, tears rushing down your cheeks. You expect him to sit up, snarling, grab his clothes and storm out the door. It would be fair. It is what you would do if he tried to pull the same bullshit you are right now. It’s too late to act like an adult right now, but at least you can try and salvage something. “You don’t owe me anything, Javi. Not after this. Not after this insane crap I put you through. I didn’t have any expectations then and I don’t now. You don’t owe me anything.” 

Your gaze focused on the crux of his elbow. 

“Can you please look at me?” Soft. Gentle. Patient. But firm. Brimming with shame, you lift your eyes up to him. 

Brown eyes. Sad. Hurt. He wipes your tears with his thumb, before cradling your neck. He runs one finger up and down the skin in a motion that is instantly soothing. He watches you, cautiously, and then he brings his face forward, his lips catching yours as his finger strokes your chin. He kisses you until you’re flat on your back and the tension eases from your shoulders, from your fingers, your mouth. When your lips freely receive him, he pulls back, hovering over you, hand gently settling on the cup of your jaw. 

“Since I’ve clearly not been able to convince you with anything else I’ve done, I’m just going to come out and say it.” His nose flares and he nips at his bottom lip before opening his mouth and saying, “I like you. I really like you. I really, really like you and more importantly, I want to date you. Only you. No one else. Do you understand that?”

Your mouth hangs open and a brush of his thumb makes you shiver and shut it.

“Nod so I know you understand.”

Slowly, you nod. 

“I’m not going to hurt you. Let me prove that.” He shifts closer and you nod frantically. “I’m going to take you out and we’re going to drink, you’re going to try and dance very badly . . . I’m not going to let anything bad ever happen to you.” 

And, fuck, you believe him. You do. You really do.

His lips press a promise into yours and you swallow the swelling emotion. He’s making you feel small but that’s suddenly not so bad. He pulls back and you can feel a grin spread across his lips. 

“So, now that I’ve seen you naked,” he whispers against your skin. “Does this mean I can finally be in the shower with you?” 

“Sure, but lemme take out that camera I put in there first.” He smirks as he pinches your nipple and you giggle as you slip off the edge of the bed. “What? I was very committed to winning the bet.”

“Oh, yeah? Had no idea.”

He lets you pull him to his feet and he stumbles into you. He kisses you again, crowding you to get moving.

If someone had told you that this is where all of it, everything, would end up . . .

You wouldn’t have believed them

The END

#javier peña #javier pena x reader #javier pena x you #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena smut #javier peña x y/n #javier pena x y/n #javier pena fic #javier pena one shot #javier pena x ofc #javier peña x reader #javier peña smut #javier peña x you #narcos #narcos netflix

[cherry-holmes]

Glimpse of a life with Javier Peña

Chapter 15

MAIN MASTERLIST

Summary: Six months ago you spoke with Javi for the last time. Now, you tried to continue with your life without him.

SERIES MASTERLIST

Previous chapter

Pairing: Javier Peña x Female Reader

Word count: 6.9k

Warnings: Angst. Talk of depression. Mention of daddy issues. Brief description of reader’s body. I decide not to give more warnings to avoid spoilers, so keep the reading under your own responsibility, but in general this contains +18 material.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I knew you

Leavin' like a father

Running like water, I

And when you are young, they assume you know nothing

But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss

I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs

The smell of smoke would hang around this long

'Cause I knew everything when I was young

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Finally, on December 2, 1993, Pablo Escobar died in Medellín, bringing an end to years of violence and fear to the country. Of course, the ghosts of evil would linger over for a long time. The narcoviolence was a vicious cycle that corroded everything it touched. But for now, the police of Colombia and the DEA had shown that there were still good people and hope. Even if ir wasn't completely true.

When you saw Steve's photo in the newspaper, you felt proud of him, of course, but you knew that Javier deserved to be there too. He had given many years of sacrificing his own safety and personal life to fulfill his duty. There was no other American who had done as much for his country than Javier Peña. He deserved recognition, he deserved to be decorated and rewarded for his years of service.

But instead, he was being judged for using unorthodox methods to do his job. It wasn't ideal, but it was effective in the end. Who hasn't looked for alternatives in their most desperate moments? They didn't deserve a man like him. And now he was paying the price.

You hadn't heard anything about him since that last call, six months ago. You didn't know if he had been judged or sentenced yet. And you weren't sure if you even wanted to know.

Days turned into weeks, and before you knew it, weeks had turned into months. While everything around you seemed to continue its normal course, you felt stuck in Bogotá. Memories of warm nights with him, hurried breakfasts in his truck, and cozy dinners at home lingered, haunting you like ghosts of a past life. You tried to distract yourself, to focus on the routine of daily life, but thoughts of Javier lingered like shadows in the corners of your mind. You wore the necklace he gave you on your birthday like a charm. It was your most precious treasure, the three pearls representing the love he had for you and you for him. Your fingertips sought it out every time you felt down, sometimes unconsciously.

You found it difficult to concentrate on something else, your thoughts constantly drifting back to him, to the uncertainty that clouded his future.

You started to think that maybe the problem lay within you, that you were somehow unworthy of having the man you loved beside you. Doubts ate away at your confidence, questioning your worthiness of love in any form. In the late hours of the night, you grappled with the echoes of your past, recalling the pain of your father's abandonment when you were just a child. That trauma left a deep hole of abandonment in your heart, a wound that never fully healed. And now, facing Javier's absence, it felt like history was repeating itself. The two men you had loved the most had left you, leaving behind a trail of broken promises and shattered dreams. Yes, you still had your beloved grandfather, José, but in those moments of anxiety and depression, you couldn't help but wonder what was wrong with you to not been worthy of love.

Your mother wasn't very helping either, as she wasn't very kind towards you. She never asked you how you were now that you came back or told you she missed you. And when everything with Javi happened, she made cruel comments, hinting that for him you were just another woman and that it was your fault for sleeping with him and not respecting yourself.

However, you had your sisters who supported you through the grief, and the love of your abuelo meant everything.

He was a lawyer, and he offered you a temporary job on his independent buffet while you find a job that suit your requirements.

Losing your dream job as a translator in a foreign country, enduring very difficult situations that put your life in danger, and losing the love of your life—all the trauma and heartbreak left a hole in your chest. It felt as though a part of you was missing, as though you were navigating the world with a piece of your soul torn away.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The Saturday sun bathed the cobblestone streets in a warm, golden glow as you emerged from the church, your heart still echoing the hymns of worship. Beside you, your beloved abuelo walked, his arm linked with yours, his weathered face radiant with the peace of faith.

"What do you want to eat, papá?" You asked him.

"Sarita told me about a new restaurant," he answered as your mother joined his side, "She said they have delicious barbacoa and consomé."

"I don't think you should eat that, papá," your mother intervened, her brow frowned. From the look on her face, you knew she was going to confront Sara for craving such food for grandpa. "The doctor said..."

"The doctor said many things, María," he replied firmly. "I'm going to die anyway, so I'm gonna eat my birria!"

You smiled to your abuelo's stubbornness, and although you knew that your mother could be right, you just couldn't help but want to fulfill his cravings.

"Okay, papá, we all going to have barbacoa," you promised.

Before your mother could say anything to you, your nephews and nieces ran by your side, pointing towards the churro seller.

"¡Tía, cómpranos churros!" they shouted, and you found yourself outnumbered by them.

"Okay, okay!" You smiled as you watched them bouncing in front of you. "Everyone line up by height and ask the señor de los churros nicely for yours."

Your nephews and nieces cheered at unison and ran towards the vending cart. Both your sisters insisted on pay for their own children churros, but you told them that you wanted to buy churros for everyone.

As your sisters and their husbands agreed with your grandfather and your mother to all go to eat to the restaurant Sara propose to your abuelo, you tried to help the churro's vendedor not going crazy with all four children. All of them were under ten years old, so you can imagine how noisy and playful – and troubling – they can be.

As the kids devoured their churros, you juggled between keeping an eye on them and ensuring they didn't wander off too far. Their laughter filled the air, echoing against the cobblestone streets as they ran around in playful abandon.

Guiding your nephews and nieces back to your family, you barely noticed the bustling activity around you until a familiar voice pierced through the chaos. "I've always known that you look even more beautiful around kids."

You froze in disbelief, your heart skipping a beat at the sound of his voice. You turned around and saw Javier standing there. For a moment, time seemed to stand still as you took in the sight of him. He looked different, yet somehow the same—the same rugged charm, the same warm gaze that had always captivated you. His mere presence was like a jolt of electricity, sending shivers down your spine and stirring emotions you thought long buried.

As the reality of his presence sank in, a whirlwind of emotions swept through you. Part of you wanted to run into his arms, to hold him close and never let go. Another part wanted to push him away, to confront him for leaving without a word, for breaking your heart with his silence.

But as you looked into his eyes, you saw the pain and regret reflected in his gaze—the same pain you had been carrying in your heart all these months. And in that moment, all your anger and hurt melted away, replaced by a flood of overwhelming love and longing.

"Javi?" your voice cracked, eyes inevitably flooded with tears. ''How...?''

"I'm sorry," he whispered, his voice barely above a breath. "I shouldn't have left you like that."

Without another word, you closed the distance between you, your heart pounding with anticipation. Javier's eyes softened as you reached out, your arms trembling as they closed around his torso. The touch was electrifying, sending a surge of warmth coursing through your veins.

You couldn't understand exactly how he was right there, what happened during all those months?, how the hell did he found you? But he was there, he was between your arms again... His warmth, his scent, his beating heart beneath your ear, were things you thought you would never feel again.

"¿Tía?" you heard the little voice of Ana, the youngest of your nieces, as she pulled the skirt of your dress. "Is this Javi? The boy you always cry for?"

You glanced down at her, innocent eyes wide with curiosity, and then back at Javier, uncertainty clouding your thoughts. How could you explain the complexities of love and loss to a child?

"Ana, come here," Silvia, her mother, approached to grab her. She looked at Javi and then back at your watering, reddened eyes. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah," you answered, a smile prompting on your lips, blush coloring your cheeks. It was the first time in a long, long time that you felt a genuine sense of emotion and happiness since you arrived in your birth-town. "Silvi, this is Javi. Javi, this is my sister."

Javier extended his hand towards Silvia, a warm smile gracing his lips. "Nice to meet you, Silvia," he greeted, his voice gentle and sincere.

Silvia's expression changed upon recognizing his name. Her eyes softened as she shook Javier's hand. "Likewise," she replied, her eyes flickering with curiosity. Of course, she had memorized his name and appearance through the photos you had shown her and Sara of your time in Colombia with Javi. Your sisters had wiped your tears and listened to your heartbreaking cries for him.

You saw your family approaching you, everyone seeming curious and expectant. Your hands were shaking, your heart felt like it could punch through your chest. So had so many questions, so many things to say to him. Suddenly, you felt overwhelmed.

"Buenas tardes," your abuelo approached to you. You recognized that look on his face, the same he had every time you or your sisters met a new boy. Your abuelo had always been the jealous kind, but in a sweet way.

Javier greeted your abuelo, extending his hand in a gesture of respect. "Mucho gusto, Don José. Javier Peña," he said, his voice resonating with genuine warmth, remembering your grandfather's name.

Your abuelo's eyes twinkled mischievously as he shook Javier's hand. "¡Ah! So you're the famous Javier," he replied, his tone tinged with playful teasing.

Javi looked at you with a playful arched brow, causing your face turned completely red, like a tomato. You were the most gorgeous tomato he had ever seen in his life.

"Everyone, I want you to meet Javier," you said, gesturing towards him with a smile. "Javier, this is my family."

Your sisters and their husbands exchanged glances, their eyes bright with curiosity as they greeted Javier warmly. "Nice to meet you, Javier," Sara said, extending her hand.

Javier shook her hand with a polite nod. "You too. You must be Sara."

Sara chimed in, her excitement palpable. "Yeah, it's great to finally meet you in person."

Your mother, who had been observing quietly, offered a reserved nod of acknowledgment, her expression unreadable.

As the greetings subsided, Silvia turned to Javier. "Hey, why don't you join us for lunch at the restaurant? We'd love to have you."

Before Javier could respond, you interjected gently, "Actually, if you don't mind, I'd like to have a private conversation with Javier first. We can catch up with everyone later this afternoon at home."

Javier's stomach churned at your words. "Have a private conversation" sounded like you were about to have a serious discussion. He wasn't expecting you to receive him as if nothing happened, as if he hadn't broken your heart. He was surprised and relieved when you hugged him upon seeing him, but he thought it might have been just a quick reaction, an impulsive action prompted by the heat of the moment.

Silvia's eyebrows raised in surprise, but she nodded understandingly. "Of course, hermanita. We'll see you both at home then."

With a collective agreement, your family bid you and Javier farewell, dispersing toward the church's parking lot with chatter and laughter trailing behind them. You turned to Javier, a mixture of anticipation and nerves swirling in your chest, ready to finally have the private conversation you'd been yearning for.

"So, shall we take a taxi?" you said finally.

"Actually, I brought my truck," he said, pointing at the park across the street, where you saw a red 90s Chevrolet Silverado.

"You drove all the way here?" The thought of him driving three hours, crossing the border, just to see you stirred a whirlwind of emotions within you. It was both overwhelming and heartwarming to know that he had gone to such lengths to be with you.

"Of course, from Laredo" he confessed.

As you walked across the street towards his truck, the atmosphere between you felt familiar, bringing back a flood of memories. Javier unlocked the truck and held the door open for you, as you settled into the passenger seat, the scent of his cologne enveloped you, filling you with a sense of comfort.

Once you were there, feeling overwhelmed by his return, after everything you had been throgh being away from him, thinking he was even in jail. It was too much, you barely could process it... You finally broke, as soon as Javi closed the drivers door, you started crying.

Javier's heart ached as he watched you cry, his own emotions swirling inside him like a tempest. He reached out tentatively, his hand hovering over yours, unsure if he should offer comfort or give you space.

He called your sweet name in a way only he could. You felt shivers just hearing it, reminding you of the power he had over you.

You turned to him, tears streaming down your cheeks, your eyes filled with a mixture of sadness, relief, and confusion. "Why, Javi?" you whispered, your voice trembling with emotion. "Why did you leave me?"

Javier's heart clenched at the pain in your voice, the anguish etched into your features. He took a deep breath, steeling himself to face the truth, to lay bare his soul before you.

"I thought I was doing the right thing for you," he began, his voice barely above a whisper. "I was trying to protect you."

You wanted to ask again "why?" but you knew it was unnecessary because you understood why. He was trying to shield you from becoming attached to a convict, a man who was not physically free. It had taken you a long time to grasp the magnitude of the situation and his sacrifice. Javier Peña wasn't a selfish man.

"It's important to me for you to understand that at that moment everything seemed to be against me," he continued, his eyes staring at you with longing and desperation, as he feared you wouldn't want to hear him or wouldn't believe him. "Don Berna betrayed me and forced Judy Moncada to leave Colombia and spill everything about the DEA agent who was foolish enough to trust them. I was told that I had committed a federal crime by getting involved with Los Pepes."

For a moment, the gravity of his words left you speechless, grappling with the enormity of what he had endured. You knew firsthand the dangers and complexities of his work, but hearing the details of his ordeal sent a chill down your spine.

"I had to make a choice," Javier continued, his voice tinged with regret. "I couldn't risk your safety, not when everything was falling apart around me. I thought I was doing what was best for you, even if it meant sacrificing my own happiness."

New tears welled up in your eyes as you reached out to him, your hand trembling as it touched his. In that moment, words seemed inadequate to express the depth of your emotions, the overwhelming rush of love and forgiveness that flooded your heart.

"I missed you," you confessed, your voice barely contained. "I was devastated. Not only for how things between us ended, but for thinking about what would happen to you..."

Javier's gaze softened as he listened to your heartfelt words. He reached out, gently brushing away your tears with his thumb, his touch sending a wave of warmth through you.

"I missed you too, every moment," he admitted, his voice filled with raw emotion. "Not a day went by when I didn't think about you. Te amo."

"Javi?" you spoke softly, wiping your tears and turning your body to fully face him.

"Yes, bonita?" he said, and your stomach fluttered with thousands of butterflies that had been sleeping, waiting to hear that word he used to call you. Bonita, you'll always be his bonita.

"Kiss me already," you whispered, the words escaping your lips before you could hold them back.

With a tender smile, Javier leaned closer, his gaze softening as he brushed a stray tear from your cheek. The air between you crackled with anticipation, the weight of months apart dissipating with each heartbeat.

As his lips met yours, a surge of warmth washed over you, igniting a fire that had been smoldering deep within. You let out a shaky moan when his tongue met yours, sending electricity to your core.

Javi growled at your reaction. He was so needed of your touch, your kisses; that skin-to-skin sensation he sink in when he made love with you. Cause even during the darkest moments when he feared he might spend the rest of his life behind bars, he couldn't bring himself to be with anyone else. He was yours, in body and spirit.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You and Javi were hungry and had so much to talk about. So you guided him through the city, searching for somewhere quiet to eat and converse. As he sat across from you at the table, perusing the menu, you still couldn't believe he was actually there—free and as handsome as ever. It felt like years had passed since Bogotá, the last time you saw him. Or maybe you suddenly died, your heart finally giving up missing him, and that was heaven.

Javi finally looked up from the menu, his gaze meeting yours. "Everything okay, sweetheart?" he asked, concern evident in his eyes as his broad hand reached across the table to touch yours.

"No... I mean, yes!" you said, your voice trailing off. "It's just... I'm so, so happy you're here, but I still can't process what happened."

Javi smiled, his eyes reflecting a mixture of tenderness and longing. "I promise, mi vida, I'll never leave you again," he vowed, his words a silent promise to cherish and protect you for as long as he lived.

The waiter approached, and you both placed your orders. After she left, you spoke again. "How did you find me?" you asked with genuine curiosity.

Monterrey was a sprawling metropolis, and in the '90s world, finding something or someone without an address or a phone number was no small feat.

Javier leaned forward, his expression radiating warmth. "It wasn't easy, but I remembered when you told me about going to church every Sunday with your family," he began, his voice low and intimate. "I recalled the name of the church and the municipality, so as soon as I arrived in the city, I searched for it. It took me all day yesterday, but I managed to get a lead, and it paid off. I found the right one."

You nodded, deeply impressed by his determination and resourcefulness. He was a proper DEA agent who spent years looking for and taking down sicarios. Of course, he was going to find his girlfriend on the first try. It was very sweet how he would do anything just to be with you, though, to have you back.

"I was fuckin' terrified that you were angry with me for leaving you like that," he continued, his voice tinged with regret. "Or worse, that you may have someone else already."

You looked at Javier, sensing the vulnerability in his eyes, and felt a pang of empathy. The thought of him fearing your anger or the possibility of you being with someone else touched you deeply.

"Javi, I could never be angry with you for trying to protect me," you said softly. "I was angry and devastated at first, I'm not gonna lie," you confessed, your chest aching with memories of those endless nights of overthinking and tears. "But it wasn't directed towards you, but towards life. I couldn't accept the decision you had to make, but with time, I came to understand that you only wished the best for me, and it was very sweet and unselfish."

You reached your delicate hand across the table to grasp his. "And as for someone else, there's never been anyone else for me. It's always been you."

His eyes softened, relief flooding his features as he squeezed your hand gently. "You're the only one for me, too, bonita. You're the best thing that could ever happen to this son of a bitch."

You leaned forward to kiss his lips. The familiarity of his touch was overwhelming and comforting at the same time.

When the meal was over and both of you were back in his truck, you asked him where he was staying.

Javier glanced at you, his expression thoughtful as he considered your question. He mentioned a hotel downtown, and you recognized it from what you had heard.

"You can stay a couple of days. I want to show you the city and introduce you properly to my family, if you don't mind," you proposed.

"Me encantaría pasar todo el tiempo del mundo contigo, mi vida preciosa," he said, and you flushed at the sweet nickname. "Actually, I was thinking about moving to a hotel closer to your house."

"That won't be necessary. You can stay with me," you offered without hesitation, feeling a rush of warmth at the idea of having him close again. "I'm living with my abuelo y mi mamá."

"I don't want to be a bother," he began, but you took his hand gently and looked into his puppy eyes.

"You're family now, and family never bothers," you assured him. "My abuelo has a spacious house, and you can stay in the guest bedroom. You know, we can sleep together..."

"That's okay, baby. I understand," he agreed, leaning over to place a kiss on your lips. "So, where do you want to go now? Wanna go home?" he asked, turning on the gear.

"Actually," you began, your cheeks burning and your heart pounding with anticipation, "I was thinking that we could go to your hotel."

With a mischievous grin, Javier glanced at you, his eyes alight with excitement. "Can we?" he asked, his voice filled with playful anticipation.

You smiled shyly, nodding as your cheeks turned cherry red. "Unless you want to spend the evening elsewhere."

Javier's eyes sparkled with amusement as he caught your playful tone. "Oh, I'm perfectly content to spend the evening wherever you desire," he replied, his voice laced with a hint of mischief.

You chuckled softly, feeling a rush of excitement tinged with nervousness.

"Be careful what you wish for, baby," he added, his voice filled with longing. "I've missed you so damn much."

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The hotel room was nice, elegant and spacious. But of course you didn't noticed that at first, as you were very busy devouring Javi's mouth. He guided you towards the bed, hands squeezing the soft flesh of your hips; yours cupping his head.

"I love you," he muttered against your mouth, pausing briefly as you unbuttoned his shirt. "You don't have any idea how much I needed you. I couldn't breathe..."

His voice wavered with emotion, and you couldn't help but notice the vulnerability in his tone. Your fingers brushed against his lips, a silent gesture of reassurance. You still had a lot of questions, things that you would like to know, but you were sure that you had a lot of time to do it. For example, when his next move was to get rid of his shirt and you saw the scar on his side, where you knew he had been shot. Your fingers traced the damaged skin, your throat constricting at the sight of him being hurt, where he could have lost his life...

In that moment, you didn't want to cry anymore, to regret things that, fortunately, were in the past now.

"I'm here," your voice was barely a whisper, but he was close enough to hear every word. "I'm not going anywhere."

Javi nodded in agreement, leaning in to meet your lips once again. His skilled fingers unzipped the back of your dress, sending shivers all over your body as his fingertips met your skin. The light fabric pooled around your feet, his gaze darkening as it roamed over your body with desire.

His hands captured your waist, caressing the skin of your ribs and hips. His touch felt desperate, yet gentle. His fingers traced the exposed, soft skin at the edge of your bra, then smoothly moved to unclasp it, freeing the lace that covered your breasts.

You were hypnotized by the waves of heat emanating from both your naked torsos. Restless to relive that skin-to-skin sensation you longed for so much.

"God, how I missed your body," he whispered, almost unconsciously, as he devoured you with his eyes.

Your cheeks flushed even more, a shy smile appearing on your lips. "And I missed your touch, Javi," you confessed back.

With a mischievous grin, Javier glanced at you, his eyes alight with excitement. "Did you?," his voice filled with playfulness. "Did you touch yourself when you missed me?" He wanted to know. You nodded, an innocent gesture that made his cock throb on his pants. "C'mere. Show me," he ordered, leading you to the bed, where he had you lie back in the center.

Javi knelt in front of you, between your legs, your core aching with anticipation. "C'mon, take your panties off," he ordered, and you gladly obeyed.

Pushing your hips up, you grasped the edges of your panties with your fingers and began to slide the garment down your legs.

He couldn't help but hiss when he saw the glistening between your folds, where your honey pooled for him. "Touch yourself, baby, just like how you did when you were thinking of me," he whispered.

You traced a path on your skin, from the place above your belly button, down your body until your delicate middle finger met your slick. Javier was mesmerized as he watched you move up and down along your pussy, taking extra care every time you reached your clit, causing little whimpers to escape from your lips.

Suddenly, Javi felt his pants getting tighter; it was almost painful not to free himself. His hands went to his belt, and he started working on it. "Keep going," he encouraged you, as your eyes followed the glorious path of pubic hair that preceded his cock. You bit your lip, intensifying the movements on your pussy, the sound of your wetness filling the room.

"Don't be shy," he said, his voice thick with lust. "That little pussy looks so good."

You took his word and inserted one finger into your warm body. His breath quivered at the sight; he couldn't contain himself anymore.

"How does it feel?" he asked, as he took his hardened cock out of his briefs. You whimpered at the sight, your walls clenching, as if they were screaming to be stretched by its length. Javi took himself in hand and started jerking off to satisfy his own itch.

"G-good," you mumbled. It was true, but you knew it was nothing compared to the feeling of his cock inside you. So you added a second finger to try to calm your urgency, the gushing sounds surrounding you as you moved your fingers in and out of your pussy. But it wasn't enough. You wanted him.

"Javi..." you murmured.

"Tell me, bonita," he responded, his voice filled with anticipation. "Tell me what you want."

"I want you," you said, without stopping your movements.

"You want me? You want this?" he teased, showing off his cock right in front of you. A pearl of precum glistened on its tip, veins pulsating along its length. Your mouth watered at the sight. "C'mon, take it. It's yours."

He didn't have to tell you twice. You stopped what you were doing and knelt on the mattress to press your body against his. Your hand went directly to his cock, eliciting a growl from his chest.

Javi's cock fit perfectly in your tiny hand as you moved it up and down while kissing him passionately.

You let your body fall over his, and he didn't hesitate to allow himself to be placed underneath you. Your lips then moved to his neck, traveling down to his chest, his stomach... When he realized you were actually going south, he took your chin and made you look at him.

"That's not necessary..." he clarify. He wasn't expecting that.

"I want to," you insisted.

Without another word, you positioned yourself right over his cock, taking it in your hand and placing a kiss on its tip. "Fuck..." he reacted.

You were unsure what to do, as it was the first time you'd done it. You only wanted to make him feel good.

So you tried licking its head, the salty taste on your tongue making your pussy clench around nothing. Then, you attempted to take the head into your warm mouth. You had to open your mouth wider than you expected, your hand gently placed on its base. It was too big, hard, and too long.

You bobbed your head at a constant rhythm, encouraged by the moans and hisses he began to let out. Javi's hand went to your hair, gathering it into a ponytail, both to let you work easily and to clear his view. "Good job, baby," he praised.

When you tried to go further, its head at the back of your throat made you gag, so you had to take a breath. "Take it easy," he said reassuringly as he tucked a stray strand of your hair behind your ear. "You're doin' amazing."

You went back to it, but this time a little lower. "Holy shhh..." he growled, feeling the wetness and warmth of your tongue licking his balls. They tasted salty, heavy on your lips. You closed your hand around his length, moving it up and down to please him. Slurping noises filled the room, amplifying the intensity. "You look so pretty taking my cock like that baby."

You alternated between using your mouth and your hand on his cock and his balls, growing more confident with each movement, trying to take him deeper as you could. Your mouth felt like heaven for him, but he needed to stop. He wanted to fuck to you properly instead of just cum on your tongue. There would be another chance for that.

After a moment, Javi sat on the bed and gestured for you to do the same. You could barely catch your breath before his mouth captured yours, his arm around your waist. You knelt in front of him, providing easy access to your breasts, and he didn't miss the opportunity, capturing one of your nipples into his mouth. You threw your head back, moaning at the sensation, your fingers tangled in his hair.

He worshipped your body, squeezing your hips and back, massaging your ass with his broad hands. Then his fingers found your soaked pussy, taking advantage of how wet you were as he introduced one of them inside you. You whimpered, moving your hips over his hand, desperate to quell the need for him. He added a second thick finger, stretching you so damn good. They slipped in and out without effort, and Javi could feel your slick running down the bare palm of his hand.

Javi licked the sensitive skin of your nipple before shifting to your other breast. He sucked and played with the tip of his tongue on the nipple, just like he did when he played with your clit, like a starved man.

"Javi..." you whimpered.

Once he was satisfied with how wet you were, he guided his cock to your entrance as you instinctively lowered your hips. Both of you moaned as he made his way inside you, stretching your walls. The sensation was painfully familiar for both of you, the feeling of being connected in an intimate, raw way. It was as if you were born for each other, like you belonged together beyond the physical realm.

He didn't waste any time, going straight to help you move over him. Once you understood the assignment, your hips started working almost on their own. "That's it, bonita, give it to me."

You could feel him very deep inside you, his tip brushing against the entrance of your cervix, his balls thrusting against you every time you went down. 

Your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer to kiss him, engaging in a battle of tongues and a tangle of legs.

"Your cock feels amazing, mi amor, la extrañé mucho," you whispered in his ear before you bite his earlobe.

"That's why you wanted to suck my cock?" he asked, his fingers gripping tighter on your hips, urging you to move faster. "My fuckin' dirty girl, so right for me..."

"Wanna see how dirty I can get?" placing your hands on his chest, you pushed him back so he could lie down again.

He was pleased with the view. The curves of your body, every roll, every pore, every freckle, every stretch mark. You were so sexy and gorgeous.

He tried to reach for your body, but you took his wrists and placed them over his head. You started moving your hips: up and down, front and back. At first, it was slow, savoring every inch of his cock slipping inside you. Then, you moved faster, riding him as whimpers escaped from your mouth, joining the skin-to-skin sound of your bodies thrusting together. Your hands went to his chest for more balance as you rode him.

"That's it, baby. Don't stop...fuck..." he grunted, his hands on your ass to help you keep going.

You slowed down when your legs began to ache, leaning down to capture his lips. His broad, warm hands caressed your hair, trailing down to your shoulders and back until they reached your waist. With a swift, smooth movement, Javi turned you around. Before you could process it, your body was beneath his, and he penetrated you again. This time, the soft moan you made when you felt him inside was silenced by his mouth.

"I love you, bonita," he promised, moving his pelvis against yours.

With your hands cupping his head, little whimpers escaping your lips, you echoed the sentiment. "I love you so much, Javi."

His thrusts grew harder and faster, his arms bearing his weight to avoid crushing you. His growls and whimpers were music to your ears. Your lips caressed the soft skin of his neck, your hands roamed everywhere along his broad back. He was lost in you, shivers crossing his entire being every time he reached that deep spot inside you, eliciting cries of his name from your lips.

"You like that, bonita? Hm?" he breathed out, his voice captivated by his own pleasure. "Fuck, I love your pussy."

Your orgasm was so close, he could tell by the way your walls clenched around his length, and the rivers of your nectar emanating from your cunt. You tried to warn him, but you could only mumble as your body shuddered beneath him. "I know, baby... Fuck, I'm gonna cum too."

You felt how he was doubtful about his next move. He wanted you to come, of course, but he was so dangerously close to his own release that he needed to be careful not to come inside you. But you were so horny and lost on the pleasure that you knew you want his load dripping out your pussy.

So you tangled your legs around his torso, forcing him inside you. "I'm gonna cum..." he warned.

"It's okay... I want you to fill me up..." you moan.

"Yeah? That's what you want, honey?" He cooed, his lips placing soft, wet kissed on your jawline.

You nodded, "Ye-yes! Fuck, Javiii!" that's the only thing you could say, as his movements were almost erratic, hungrily against you.

"I'm gonna fuck a baby into you... What about that?" he grunted, the mere thought of it made the both of you shiver with pleasure.

"Yes! Oh my... Yes! I-wa.... I'm wanna have your baby, Javi," you mumbled, so lost on the moment that you couldn't even think about the weight of the words you spoke.

"I'm gonna cum so deep on you that you're gonna smell like me for days, baby."

Those were the words that made you finally lost it. Your entire body seemed to implode for a moment before it exploded on a devastating orgasm. Throwing your head back against the mattress, your nails digging on the muscles of his arms and toes curling as your squirted on his cock. A silent scream of pleasure took the shape of Javi's name.

With one last final thrust, Javier followed you reaching his release between deep-voice whimpers and grunts of your name over and over again. You felt his warm load filling up, mixing with your slick, making you clenched even more, milking him so damn good.

As he felt himself softening, he pulled out and lay beside you as both of you tried to catch your breath again. Finally, Javi wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close to his chest, the warmth of his body comforting against your skin. You lay there together in silence, the only sounds filling the room were the rhythmic beating of your hearts and the soft exhales as you both recovered from the intensity of your lovemaking.

After a while, Javier felt your body shake a bit, and it wasn't long before he heard you sniffing. Were you crying? He tried to see your face, but you hid from him with your face against his chest. It was evident that you were crying. He felt a pang in his chest, concern washing over his face as he tried to make you look up at him.

"Are you okay?" he asked, his voice charged with worry and guilt. "Did I hurt you?"

"No, no," you rushed to say, wiping your tears with your fingers as his brushed your hair and placed it behind your ear. "You didn't do anything. I'm just so happy."

Javier's expression softened as he pulled you closer, wrapping his arms around you protectively. "I'm here, mi amor," he murmured, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. "I'm not leaving you ever again."

You melted into his embrace, feeling safe and loved in his arms, the bliss of your orgasms still lingering on your bodies. After a moment of silence, he spoke again, his fingers gently tracing circles on your back. "I really meant it."

Struggling not to fall asleep, since you still had to return to your grandfather's house, you asked, "What?" Your voice was soft, barely audible above the hushed rhythm of your breathing.

"I want to have babies with you." His words hung in the air, tinged with both sincerity and excitement.

You flushed, a warmth spreading across your cheeks as you processed his declaration. Your heart started to beat faster, and you didn’t even think he was completely serious yet.

"Well, we have to get married first, then," you replied, a hint of playfulness in your tone.

"I know,” he added, determination on his tone, “I'm going to ask your grandfather for your hand tomorrow." His eyes meeting yours with unwavering resolve.

"Are you serious?" Your voice was tinged with surprise, a mixture of disbelief and anticipation.

Javier nodded, his gaze softening as he tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear. "Absolutely serious," he affirmed, his tone earnest. "¿Quieres casarte conmigo?”

Your heart fluttered at his words, a rush of emotions welling up inside you. New tears of joy fell down your cheeks as you nodded repeatedly. "¡Sí! Sí quiero, Javi. Quiero casarme contigo," you admitted, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips.

"Then it's settled," he declared, pressing a tender kiss to your forehead, pulling you closer to him again. "Tomorrow, I'll talk to your grandfather, and soon after, we'll start planning our wedding."

You nestled closer to him, feeling a sense of contentment wash over you. You still couldn’t believe what was happening in that moment. Just that morning, your heart ached with his absence, and you couldn't imagine seeing him ever again. If someone had told you that same afternoon you would be in his arms again, making love with him, and practically engaged, you wouldn't have believed it. You would have thought it was a cruel joke. And yet, there he was with you, vowing to share a life together.

NEXT CHAPTER

#pedro pascal #fanfic #narcos #pedro pascal x reader #javier peña smut #javier peña fic #javier pena imagine #javier pena fic #javierpeña #javier pena smut #javier peña x reader #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena narcos #javier peña #javier peña scenes #javier pena x reader #javier pena x you #javi peña #javi pena #pedro pascal fluff #pedropascalfanfic #pedro pascal smut #javierpeña x reader #javier pena fluff #javier pena one shot

[nerdieforpedro]

Weekend Update 02/25/2024

Nerdie! You saw it right! He won! *hugs tightly*

Yes he did! 🥰 We're all so happy for him! Finally!

We're also buzzing about how he looks like he's on the cover of a romance novel. Maybe on a ranch, maybe in the 1800's. It's a pretty versatile look. He likes his deep V's....

As we all should. Also, I'm taking notes on that. *scribbles*

Anything new besides, well clearly pirate adventures?

Pirates have scurvy and Pedro is well nourished so none of that. Other ideas for his characters. Ezra and Pero might have scurvy though. I did manage to write some this week. It's been busy. 👀 Ugh...real life stuff. Nothing major. Just needs to be done.

Nerdie's fics:

Guiding Light (Ezra one shot - I was chatting with @lady-bess and had the idea for this. I always have Ezra in some crime. 😎)

Lunch is happening right? (Part two of my summer romance Javi G fic. Not sure how many parts.)

He told me his name (Din Djarin x plus size female reader) I wrote it after reading a new Din fic by @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin (will be listed below. I'd still call it moody because despite writing, I still have trouble with my vocabulary. 🤣 It is pretty though. I'm working on a follow-up since people asked 👀)

Can't win carino (Javi G one shot - for @i-own-loki because she gave me the idea and the moodboard so I ran with it.)

The Man Next Door (Jake Lockley one shot for @megamindsecretlair because she kinda asked, more like I asked her what she wanted in it. She asked for action and smut. I might try more action in fics later.)

Get a room you two and BONE (Part two of my Tim Rockford comedy series which now has romance? I binged too much B99, watched a bit of Castle and a few episodes of Kojak with my mom. The insanity will only increase with part three but maybe there might be some growth between Tim and Doc? Or a hippo.)

Nerdie I thought you said you were busy....that's six fics...

I was and some of them I had been working on for a while. I also had some insomnia (that lead to parts two and three of the Tim Rockford fic). Anyway, on to the main event! 😘

Nerdie's fic recommendations! or things I read this week. 😄

14 x kisses by @trulybetty (Jack Daniels x reader) Part of her 29 days of valentines for February.

Sorgan Girls Are Easy - Solo Din Djarin by @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin (the fic that inspired my Din - her Din has 100% more smut)

Half of you - chapter 3 by @foxilayde (Santiago Garcia x fem. reader) Slow burn series - love it and trying to read it slowly to savor it.

Falling for you by @toomanystoriessolittletime (Javi Pena x fem reader) A bittersweet read that had me wonder what was next but I was hopeful.

Sunday Naps by @javierpena-inatacvest (Frankie Morales x fem reader) More proof that cuddling with Frankie leads to wonderful things.

Poe Dameron falling in love with his shy best friend (GN reader) by @i-belong-to-the-stars What one hopes for if you're shy and you're in love with those curls...er Poe. 🫣

Mystery Strain by @rebel-held (Dieter Bravo x GN reader) All kinks are valid and who doesn't love Dieter with a belly? 😘

Bulletproof by @laurfilijames (Jax Teller x fem reader) She wrote poetic porn with feelings. I was overcome, titllated and confused.

A girl walks into a bookshop by @oonajaeadira (Ezra x fem reader) Soft Ezra with a bookshop, yes please! 😄

Beneath the mask by @saradika (Din Djarin x fem reader) A medieval knight Din...so where does one pick up the velvet dress?

Loneliness by @sirowsky (Pero Tovar x GN reader) Pondering Pero in your local Park? Highly recommended for Valentine's Day.

15 x cashmere by @trulybetty (Joel Miller x GN reader) What thread count was it that encouraged Joel to hop in bed in such a state? For my personal file. 👀

He sees you by @maggiemayhemnj (Joel Miller x reader) This writer will tell you she just loves words. I would argue that the words love her in a unique way that makes you see the things. 💜

16 x dance by @trulybetty (Tim Rockford x reader) I pictured him dancing with the reader in his trench coat. @secretelephanttattoo (El) is to the holsters as I am to the trench coat. 🤣 In my mind.

Quiet Moments Collection by @secretelephanttattoo (various Pedro characters x reader) It’s the small instances that you think don’t matter, that are the most meaningful.

Plus One by @always-andromeda (Frankie Morales x fem reader) Always a fan of two idiots in love, even with their spat.

A Strange Fate by @youandmeand5bucks (Silva x fem reader) Two people who came together because of life circumtances. Are they really satisfied?

A Beskar Valentine by @firstofficerwiggles (Din Djarin x female reader) Awesome username, it makes me giggle. Din will be ten steps ahead and still fifteen behind when it comes to matters of the heart. My guy is an overthinking champion.

Seven by @lokischocolatefountain (Javier Pena x reader) A simple discussion about children leads Javier to a drastic solution.

To be Explored Later by @legendary-pink-dot (Frankie Morales x fem reader x Santiago Garcia) aka Ms. Curls if ya nasty! 😘 Somehow I missed the gem of a sandwich. How the reader was able to think about anything is beyond me.

Red Light Glow by @missredherring (Lucian Flores x fem reader) This man has me and @rhoorl keeping track of his silk shirt and gold chain. We would accept his call. The guilt would go away too quickly if we felt it at all. 😌

Incarnadine by @iamskyereads (Pero Tovar x fem reader) This Pero has me swoon with his care toward the reader, his love of baths (I just want him to soak and relax - he's been earning coin!), and his word choice. This is another person that words appear to favor. 💜

Not like I fangirled over these writers this week or anything 👀

What on the docket for this week Nerdie?

Part three of the Javi G summer romance

Maybe...Roc & Doc part three I don't like sitting on finished parts but then I whine about having no motivation for the next part. 👀 I make no sense.

March is toward the end of the week so my March Spring Prompts will start! I scheduled the first six days I think. I got anxious about getting behind (which isn't the point of doing them but anxiety doesn't care) and did some in advance. I like how they're coming along and that they're short. Unlike this update. 🤣 They won't have summaries, but will have warnings, tags and notes.

And because I hear series and I think "I should start another one!" I decided to write an Ezra series. How did I happen upon our favorites prospector/scoundrel/reluctant father figure? I've been reading works by @morallyinept @maggiemayhemnj and @magpiepills

Ezra intimidated me because of his language, but actually, I think I'd get along with him because he puts on a persona with a great deal of performance. It's the audience's job to figure out if you're serious or not. Or at least that's how I approached him. 🤨 This could go badly. I stuck him on the bayou with an air boat and I want him to cook gumbo. *full delusional achievement unlocked*

Special shout-outs to @connectioneverywhere and @soft-girl-musings for sending me lovely asks this week.

Also to @inept-the-magnificent who called Tim Rockford her sidepiece and I am still very tickled. 🤣

This update was long 🤗 Hehe

Love Nerdie ❤️

#weekend update #Nerdie #Nerdie's update #pedro pascal characters #fanfiction #pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #din djarin #joel miller #frankie morales #dieter bravo #the mandalorian #nerdie fic rec #pero tovar lovers unite! #pero tovar #ezra prospect #Ezra #jax teller #javier peña #javier gutierrez #tim rockford #jack daniels #Lucian Flores

[pascalscoffin]

Muñequita pt. III

Full Pedro Masterlist

Series Masterlist

It’s a series now…

Prev Next (coming soon)

Warning: Minors Go Away I Will Kick You In The Forehead. Smut: vaginal fingering; brief dry humping; oral (m and f receiving); Javi has a filthy mouth; Cum sharing/eating; Javi calls your pussy "she" (Yes this is gonna happen a lot in prob a lot of fics- i just think its hot okay bye). No piv cause they’re responsible this time. It’s date night bitchessss. Alcohol consumption (some wine). Javi being his usual flirtatious self. Guess what they go dancing again. Javi actually knows how to dance (like tango and shit cause his mama. I however do not know how to dance I just like watching people dance okay goodbye). Javi being an absolute fucking gentleman.

Again, super long

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Date night with Javier came faster than you thought it would, the next two days practically flying by with Valeria in school for most of the day, allowing you to relax and actually clean the house, and then spent the rest of your time obsessing over your date with Javi.

At about three o’clock, four hours before your date, you were sitting in the salon chair getting your hair washed and done up. Your nerves had your leg shaking and you had to keep reminding yourself to stop it so your hair wouldn’t come out janky.

When your hair was done you paid and then rushed home, letting Valeria sit in the bathroom while you got ready, even putting a little lipgloss on her when she asked you to. “Where are you going?” She asked curiously.

“Papá is taking me out on a date.” Valeria gasped loudly. “You didn’t tell me?! Why didn’t you tell me?!” You laughed softly. “You have to tell me next time, mami!” “Okay, okay! I’ll tell you next time.” You shook your head fondly. “You would probably know if you weren’t so obsessed with Elmo.” She groaned. “But you said not to listen to grown up stuff!” You pursed your lips a little. She had you there. “You’re a very good listener, Valeria.” You kissed the top of her head. “Now, papá will be here in… half an hour. How many minutes is that?”

“Thirty!” Valeria threw her hands up as she shouted the number, making you smile. “Muy bien. Una muñequita tan lista.” Very good. Such a smart little doll You said happily, walking out of the bathroom with her, subconsciously straightening and fiddling with the hem of it.

You were so nervous you hadn’t been able to eat anything all day, your stomach twisting itself into knots and flipping upside down and inside out. You weren’t sure why you were nervous, Javi liked you, you knew that, and he loved Valeria.

But even still, the what ifs started to plague your brain. What if he says something funny and drink comes shooting out of your nose all over him? What if he just finds your laugh annoying? (Absolutely ridiculous because he’d explicitly told you the night you met that he absolutely adored it) what if the date goes astronomically well and then just as you’re about to seal the deal, clothes strewn, he decides he doesn’t like your body post-baby?

You have cellulite now, stretch marks across your stomach and the insides of your thighs, the tightly pulled skin more sensitive than all those years ago. What if he decides he prefers women with smoother skin, unbothered by blemishes?

“¿Mami? ¿Qué te pasa?” Mommy? What’s wrong? Valeria tugged on your hand and you looked down at her. “Nothing. I’m fine, sweetheart.” You kissed her cheek and went to sit down with her, or more to let her sit while you stayed standing, not wanting to crease your dress before Javi saw it in all its original glory. After a moment you heard Valeria’s little voice speak up.

“You look pretty, mommy.” You looked over at her and smiled softly, stopping your pacing to go over to her. “Thank you, Valeria.” You sighed and finally sat down. “I’m nervous.” You told her, laughing lightly.

“Why?” You opened your mouth and then closed it, humming. “… I’m just worried he won’t… like me like he did.” Valeria didn’t seem to understand, frowning deeply and shaking her head. “But… he asked you on a date.” You bit your lip. Leave it to a five year old to inadvertently tell you to get your head out of your ass.

“That’s… true.” You laughed. “I’m sorry, Muñequita. It’s adult stuff.” Valeria looked at you funny but dropped it and looked back at the tv, leaning into you now that you were sitting down.

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When a knock finally came Valeria perked up and bolted to the door, peering through one of the side windows to make sure it was Javi before yanking the door open excitedly, just barely able to reach the handle. “Daddy!” She squealed, throwing herself into his legs as Javier laughed, overjoyed that Valeria was still so excited to see him.

“Valeria!” He gushed, reaching down to pick her up with one arm, the other holding flowers. “You look handsome, daddy.” Valeria giggled and played with Javi’s tie, when she saw the flowers, though she gasped loudly before he could respond.

“Are those for mommy?” She whispered as you came around the corner. Javier grinned and nodded. “They are for mommy.” He looked over when he heard your footsteps and his smile slipped but was replaced instead with a shocked expression, his eyes running over your frame as he gently set Valeria down. “Hey.” He said softly.

You felt your cheeks warm up as you shifted. “Hey.” You smiled softly. “Mommy! Daddy got you flowers, look!” Valeria pointed to the flowers as she bounced. “They’re so pretty!” Your eyes fell to the flowers as Javier held them out to you.

“Oh- Javi you didn’t have to get-“ “what kinda dad would I be if I didn’t show Valeria how a man is supposed to treat her on a date?” Javi raised a brow and you couldn’t help but laugh as you took them. “Besides… hard workin’ mama like yourself needs some pretty flowers.” You felt your cheeks warm up as you smiled and brought the flowers up to sniff. “… thank you. I’m gonna put them in water and uh… then we have to run Valeria to Mrs. Sanders’ and then we can go.” You laughed softly.

Javi nodded and followed you inside while you put the flowers in water and made sure you had everything you needed, mumbling to yourself. Keys, purse, phone, Valeria and Javi-you pointed towards where they stood by the door-and my brain. “Okay let’s go.”

Javi looked down at Valeria with a does-she-always-do-this kinda face, to which Valeria responded with a simple nod. You stopped in front of them and put your hands on your hips, clearing your throat. When they looked at you, you saw two identical puppy eyed what faces, causing you to shake your head. “Come on, Mrs. Sanders is waiting.”

“Mommy she told you to call her Sandy.” Valeria put her tiny hands on her tiny hips and raised a brow at her. “Okay, Miss sassafras.” “Miss sassafras?” Javi looked at you curiously and you shrugged. “Something my grandma used to say when I got sassy.” You looked back at Valeria, missing the way he smiled and gazed at the two of you, like you were his whole world.

Javi held Valeria on your short walk across yards, even though you’d told both of them she was more than capable of doing it alone. They both had the same excuse it’s dark out! They just met and they were already two peas in a pod. Your actual womb was practically bursting at the sight of them connecting so quickly.

As you stepped onto the porch and knocked, Javi looked around and then at you. “I know why your neighborhood seems familiar now.” “Oh, really?” Before he could answer the door swung open and there was a loud squeal.

“¡Javier! ¡Qué alegría verte! Bienvenido a casa, ¡mira qué guapo te has puesto!” Javier! Oh it’s so good to see you! Welcome home, look how handsome you’ve gotten! Sandy pulled Javi and, by association, Valeria into a bone crushing hug. “¡Adelante, adelante! No te entretendré mucho, pero necesito verte a la luz, Dios mío.” Come in, come in! I won’t keep you long but I need to see you in the light, my goodness She ushered the three of you in. “My gosh. How have you been, Javi?”

You stepped into her living room, Javi sitting Valeria on the couch and smiling at Sandy. “I’m good, Sandy. How’ve you been?” “Oh I’ve been okay. Much better now that I have y/n and Valeria to keep me company.” Javi grinned and looked at you, absolutely charmed that you kept his tia-by-association company in her old age. “They’re good company to keep, no?” Javi’s cheeks turned just a flash pink before he was nodding in agreement. “They are.”

You felt your own face warm up and Sandy laughed softly. “Okay, you two go on now. You and I can catch up another time. You have reservations to get to. Off you go.” Sandy was practically shoving you out the door now. “Jeez, where’s the love?”

“It’s there. Feel it. Embrace it. Now share it. Goodnight I will see you tomorrow. Valeria say goodbye to mommy and daddy!” “¡Adiós mamá! ¡Adiós papá!” Goodbye, mommy! Goodbye, daddy! Valeria yelled, occupied with her cookies and tv.

“That’s all we’re getting.” You laughed, the two of you calling goodbye back to her before going to Javi’s truck. Javi, of course opened your door for you and even took your hand to help stabilize you while you got into his truck.

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About twenty-five minutes later after a fifteen minute drive and a ten minute wait, you were seated at your table, Javier looking over the wine list. “This place doesn’t have beer but I remember you saying you liked red, and they have good reds.” You felt your cheeks warm up, remembering momentarily mentioning, six years ago mind you, that you preferred red wine over most alcohol drinks, joking that it made you feel fancy but it also just didn’t upset your stomach quite as much as other kinds did.

“You remember that?” You asked curiously. He looked up over the top of the menu and pursed his lips a bit before he nodded. “Yeah.” He said softly, shrugging. “… I remember a lot of the stuff we talked about.” He smiled softly. You smiled shyly and looked down. “I do, too.” You said softly and he nodded, reaching across the table slowly. “I’m glad you agreed to this.” He gently took your hand and you laughed softly as you laced your fingers with his. “Me too.”

“I know I’ve said it four times since we got in my truck but you really look good tonight.” You laughed softly and looked down as your face warmed up. “Thank you, Javi. So do you. I like that tie.”

Javier looked down at his tie and grinned. “Yeah? Thanks, Christmas gift from my dad.” He muttered, his smile dropping a little as he remembered all the Christmases he’d missed and felt the guilt build in his stomach as you reached across the table, taking his hand in yours.

“Jav… it’s not your fault, okay?” You said softly, squeezing his hand. “It’s mine. I should’ve told you.” You chewed on your lip. “Her birthday is in a few months, though. You can make it up to her then. Besides… she understands why she never got presents from you, you were busy. Fighting the Chicos malos, remember?” Javier chuckled softly and shook his head.

“… she really thinks I’m some kinda hero.” It wasn’t a question, more of a statement, like he was testing the words, getting a feel for them. “Cause you are, Javi.” You rolled your eyes. “Maybe not by traditional standards, but you are a type of hero. Especially to her.” You said softly. “You can’t freak out every time she says it. Otherwise you’ll be in a constant state of freaked the fuck out.”

Javier actually laughed this time, boisterously, and the sight made you smile, laughing with him as he nodded. “Fine. Fine. I’ll stop.” He sighed and looked down at the wine menu again. “Alright… I think I know which one we’re gonna get. You can get whatever you want to eat, Querida. Don’t worry about the price.”

You wondered briefly why he said that- and then you looked at the menu and choked on your own spit. “Jesus- Javi this is-“ “if you say this is too much I’m gonna shove a breadstick in your mouth.” Javi picked up a breadstick and pointed it at you, his eyes locked onto his own food menu. “You birthed my child by yourself five years ago. The least I can do is buy you an expensive dinner.”

You closed your mouth and pouted a little before nodding. “Okay.” You sighed softly and looked through the menu, finding yourself subconsciously looking at the cheaper things on the menu before wandering over towards the higher priced items, deciding to go with the lowest priced thing from the more expensive items.

After the waiter came and took your orders, he poured you both a glass of the wine Javi before leaving the bottle there in a bucket of ice, and then walking away to take other orders. You and Javi talked about the wine, you knowing more about what to say since Javi was more of a liquor or beer man.

“… how long was it? Your labor?” He asked softly after a few minutes of surprisingly comfortable silence. “Oh god.” You laughed softly. “Um… 26 hours.” His eyes got wide. “26-?!” He looked around when a bunch of old people looked at him and you smiled awkwardly and waved shyly. “26 hours?” He whisper-shouted, leaning across the table.

You nodded slowly. “Yeah.” “That’s an entire day plus two hours.” “Last time I checked.” “Fuck..” you laughed softly. “How the hell did you look so good in that picture?” You blinked a couple times and raised a brow. “Good? Javi- I’m covered in sweat, afterbirth, tears. I look like I just lost a fight with a UFC fighter.”

Javier started shaking his head. “You look fucking gorgeous in that photo.” “You’re actually psychotic, I’m afraid. I look like a troll guarding a bridge.” “Don’t talk about the mother of my child that way.” Javi tore a piece of breadstick off and chucked it at you, his eyebrows lifting when it fell right into your dress.

You looked down at your chest and then up at him and the two of you started laughing. “Great. Now it’s gotta stay in there.” You shook your head. “Sorry.” “Are you?” “…. Not really. That was funny.” You were still laughing about it when the waiter came back with your food, offering you both a polite smile as he announced each meal as he sat the plates down, turning them as he did so like he was showing off the food, you returned the smile and thanked him, your stomach growling louder than you wanted it to at the sight of the food.

You looked up and saw the waiter and Javier looking at you with cheeky looks. You looked between them. “I eat Dino nuggets and tater tots three times a week- any other time is spaghetti or white people tacos, okay? I’m stuck on the diet of a toddler. This food looks like heaven on a plate.”

The two of them chuckled and the waiter bid his goodbye before scampering off to do his job, sparing one last look at the two of you- you were a cute couple, usually he hated his customers but you two were just too cute to have any hate towards.

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“Dessert?” You looked up from your now empty plate towards Javier with wide eyes. “Huh?” “Do you want dessert?” Javier chuckled. “Oh god… oh my god yes.” You reached across the table, your eyes glossy and begging. “I can have the whole thing to myself?”

“Of course you can.” Javier laughed and you groaned happily. “Oh my god this is the best night of my life.” You shook your head. “I have to share everything with Valeria. Believe me I love her and I love sharing with her but… sometimes I want to eat a whole sundae by myself- or actually get to eat the ice cream I ordered because she decided to be adventurous and then decided she didn’t want the one she had- halfway through eating it so we were too far to turn around.”

“Wow.” “Sorry- I’m not trying to scare you away.” Javier shook his head frantically. “You’re not. It’s obvious you love her. I love spending time with her, and honestly I’d give her whatever the fuck she wanted from me.” You laughed and nodded. “Those big brown eyes certainly have that effect. I’m glad she got your eyes.” “I’m just glad she didn’t get my nose.” You laughed harder and shook your head. “Stop, Javi. I like your nose.”

Javi scrunched his face and shook his head. “It’s just a nose, Querida. Nothing to like about it.” You felt your cheeks warm up a little, thinking of a few things to like about it. Javier seemed to notice because a slow smirk stretched across his face. “Bonito.” Cute. He teased as you shook your head. “Shut up and eat your dessert.”

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You were back in his truck now, looking around curiously as the scenery turned from familiar to unfamiliar. “Where are we going?” You looked over at Javier curiously, brows furrowed.

He chuckled softly. “It’s a surprise.” You raised a brow. “A surprise?” He nodded. “Yes. A surprise.” He looked over at you and grinned. “Don’t worry. I think you’ll like it.” He winked and you shook your head, cheeks warming as you looked out the window.

Soon enough he pulled up outside- “Javi, is this a dance studio?” You looked up at the building, which adorned a giant sign with ballerina feet. “You’ve cracked another case, Sherlock.” Javier chuckled and got out, jogging over to your side to open the door.

“Why are we at a dance studio?” You asked as he helped you out. “They hold classes once a week.” His cheeks flushed as you looked at him. “… so that’s why you chose today.” He shrugged. “You liked La Bachata… so I thought maybe you’d like to try tango or something.” Your cheeks got hot as you shifted shyly. “Javi… that’s sweet.” You couldn’t think of what else to say. Sweet was the only word your brain could muster.

Javi chuckled and nodded. “Come on.” He took your hand and guided you to the door, opening it to let you in first. Once you got inside you found what room the class was in and felt your nerves start to scratch at your skin the closer you got to the door.

“You won’t laugh if I suck, right?” Javi laughed softly and shook his head. “Of course I won’t laugh, Hermosa.” He kissed your cheek gently. “I’ll help you. Been dancin’ since I was a niño pequeño.” Little boy. That made you even more nervous. Great. Now you were going to make a fool in front of Javi, who’s been doing this shit since he was in fucking diapers.

"Oh, great. That makes me feel so much better." You shook your head with a soft laugh and chewed on your lip. "Okay, let's go." You smiled and he nodded happily. "You'll have a good time. I promise." "I better." You teased. You knew the chances of you not having a good time were slim to none, you enjoyed being around Javi, it didn't really matter what you were doing.

When you walked into the room you were relieved to see some of the people already there seemed just as nervous as you felt, so you could relax a bit, comforted by the notion of not being the only inexperienced one seconds away from having a massive coronary.

The instructors, thankfully, were extremely nice, even if their Latin beauty made you hate them because who shimmers in florescent fucking lighting? You'd bet your whole salary that she didn't have a single stretch mark or cellulite dent.

When they had all the couples spread out across the dance floor they circled around the room, straightening posture and getting everyone into the right positions and stances. When the woman got to you, her skin golden, arms slender as she set them on her waist and tsked her tongue at you and Javier, you felt judged but not derogatorily so, more so like she was expecting something... more from the two of you, like she could feel the tensions radiating off of you..

"No, no, no. Esto no va a hacer." No, no, no. This will not do. She put her hands on your backs. "Too much space, get closer." She nudged the two of you closer and nodded when your chests bumped together. "Perfect." She smirked, gave you a little wink, and then spun on her heel and made her way back to her husband, an equally attractive Latin man with lighter skin, but his hair just as dark and eyes just as sultry as his wife's.

You watched her go and looked up at Javier curiously, your face burning. “Javi- I don’t have the coordination for this.” “Nonsense.” Javier shook his head. “You’ll do great, besides, look at the rest of these goofballs. None of them have a sexy Latin to keep them on their feet.” You shook your head at him, laughing softly. “You’re insane.” “Maybe.” Javier shrugged a little. "For you." He added with a wink.

You and the other students watched the instructors, moving with them as they showed each move a couple times, before letting the couples practice while just focusing on themselves.

Javier was good, of course he was, he practically came out the womb doing this shit. Because you had a partner that knew all the steps already, it was easy for you to get a grasp on the dance and soon enough you and Javier were moving around the floor gracefully.

You weren’t quite as confident in your moves as Javier was, which means you didn’t quite put your all into it, but the longer you danced, the more you felt Javier’s hands on your waist or sliding over your arms. You felt yourself fall further into the dance, moving more freely and less stiff.

When Javi spun you out without much of a warning you yelped, his grip on your hand kept you from spinning away completely, though. When he brought you back to his chest it was just as abrupt but not out of beat or clumsy, you let out a gasp as his free arm wrapped around your waist and tugged you tight against his chest, and then dipped you down in one fluid motion, letting go of your hand in favor of grabbing onto your thigh.

His arm around your waist, his fingers digging into your thigh, they were driving you crazy, the skin practically on fire under his calloused fingers, the digits twitching near the hem of your dress, like he wanted to push his hand up higher.

Your face and neck burned as he grinned and kissed you, slowly bringing you up, you heard clapping around you. Nothing crazy, just soft respectful claps as you shook your head. “Javi-“ “you did fantastic.” Javi chuckled and held your chin between his fingers. “Just like I thought. Practically a natural.” You shook your head again with a soft laugh. "Javi..." you repeated.

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When the class was over, the instructors stood by the door to tell everyone goodnight and to invite them back the next week.

You and Javi were closer on the way back to his truck, his arm around your waist as he opened your door for you. You kissed his cheek before getting into the truck, you knew the date would be over soon, Javi would take you home and since Valeria was staying the night with Sandy, you’d be alone and left to do house work until you got tired.

"Sorry i kissed you like that around all those people." He chuckled once he got in the driver's side. "I've been wantin' to kiss you all night, you look fucking fantastic in that dress." He started the truck as he turned his head towards you. You smiled and shook your head, reaching out to hold one of his hands while he drove. "Believe me- it was more than okay." You laughed softly.

"I've really missed you, Javi. I'm comfortable around you, even then, even now." You squeezed his hand and saw a soft smile stretch across his face. "i wanted to call, or write but I... I was just so scared and I.. I didn't want to distract you over there... I knew it was dangerous there and I didn't want you to get hurt because you found out I kept her from you."

Javi got a soft forwn on his face as he started shaking his head. "I understand, Querida. Don't feel bad. I wasn't ready to be a dad- mentally or.. physically. I wasn't a good man over there. I'm not convinced I am one over here but... I want to try. For you and her."

You smiled softly and squeezed his hand tightly. "We would love that, Javi. We really would." You said softly, leaning over to press another kiss to his cheek. He smiled and leaned into it as he nodded. "Good. I don't know what I would do if you told me you didn't want me in your lives."

You shook your head. "I'd never say that- for one I'm pretty sure Valeria would probably smother me in my sleep- if the guilt didn't kill me first." Javi chuckled and chewed on his lip. "I'm glad she likes me so much." "Likes you? Javi she's been in love with you since she was old enough to know you existed." You laughed softly.

"She used to... beg me to tell stories about you. About us..." You looked down with a small frown. "I never had much to tell her. But I made sure she knew it was my fault you weren't around. She's never had any ill-will towards you, no malice, nothing. I told her how... easy it was to be around you, though, how comfortable I was.. and she knows we weren't.. together. She doesn't understand how that works but she knows no one left or gave up." You said softly. "She... gets a little sad seeing all the other little girls with their daddies, sometimes she would.. get mad at me for it, for not telling you." Javi furrowed his brows and you shook your head. "I preferred it that way- her being mad at me instead of you." You shrugged and smiled softly at him.

"We don't have to worry about that anymore, though. You're here now, you know, and you're not running in the other direction. She loves you, you're absolutely smitten with her. All we have to focus on now is the future." Javi nodded in agreement, looking at you occasionally as he drove. He could tell you felt bad, guilty, about not saying anything to him sooner, and he hated that you felt that way.

The rest of the drive was quiet, comfortable, but still quiet. When he pulled into your driveway you took a deep breath and looked at him. "Do you... maybe wanna come in? For some wine or.. or something?" You didn't have to do anything, you weren't planning to anyway. You didn't have condoms inside, you weren't on birth control. Those were things you hadn't needed for six years, and as much as you would love to take Javi into your bedroom and let him fill you with another baby- doing something like that now would be incredibly.. dumb and premature.

Javi smiled at your offer and turned his truck off. "I would love to." He said softly before getting out and jogging over to your side, pulling open your door and taking your hand to help you out the same way he'd helped you in earlier- a quick peek over his shoulder shows Sandy peering out her window with a smirk before she disappeared.

You shook your head a little and headed to the door with Javi, opening it and stepping inside.

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Truly, you had to be an idiot to think you could be alone, in a private setting with Javi, and not want him in or on top of you. Add wine and one of your CDs to the mix and you're truly, truly fucked.

It had started simple enough, Javi stayed in the living room while you went into the kitchen and grabbed two wine glasses and a bottle of red you've had opened since he left that first night. When you'd come back you'd found him standing near your stereo, loosening his tie a bit as he looked at your collection. Both of your shoes were sitting neatly by the door in the cubby you'd bought after Valeria started walking, wanting somewhere for her to put her shoes when she took them off. The sight had your chest warming.

"... you can put one in if you want." He looked good, the lighting of your house was brighter than the restuarant but softer than the dance studio, making his skin look tanner and more touchable, you had to look away to compose yourself. "Yeah?" Javi looked at you and then back at the CDs. "Any particular one you feel like hearing?" You hummed, slowly shaking your head as you filled the glasses about halfway before setting the bottle down. "Not really, whatever you wanna listen to."

It took him a minute, but soon you heard the disc tray slide out, a cd drop on it, and then the sound of it sliding back in before the music started.

A soft smile pulled at your lips as the sound of 'Big Love' by Fleetwood Mac started to fill your ears. Your favorite. You picked up the glasses and carried them over to Javi, extending one out to him. "How'd you know this was my favorite album?" Javi chuckled and picked up the worn out case. "Intuition." He teased.

You'd showed him around a little, your house was ground floor so there were no basements or attics or upstairs to venture towards, and since he'd already seen Valeria's bedroom, and your bathroom there wasn't much else to show him, besides your bedroom, but that felt like it held an implication, a duty, so you avoided it and led him back to the couch.

It was inevitable, really, that you would end up here, Javi's lips molding against yours as your tongues pressed and twisted together as the sound of 'Everywhere' filled the house. If your mouth wasn't so occupied you probably would've laughed at how accurately it described how you'd felt about Javi since having him back.

You were perched on his lap at this point, your hips rocking together languidly. His hands were gripping your dress, bunching it up at your waist tightly, ruining that pristine perfection you'd been so worried about earlier, likely bruising your hips- except now you couldn't care about the possible bruising or the crinkles in your dress. How could you? Javi was panting into your mouth, letting out deep, quiet moans with every synchronized grind of your hips, your sounds mixing together with Stevie Nicks' voice. You'd be a fool to care about crinkling a dress when this was happening.

"You gonna show me your bedroom?" He mumbled softly and the sentence had your stomach fluttering like a teenager. "I don't have condoms." You rushed out quickly, swallowing thickly as he raised a brow. "Me neither.. obviously the birth control thing doesn't work." He teased and you laughed softly, your cheeks warming up.

"But.. y'know I can still make you cum without fucking you- and I don't know if you remember but I love it almost as much as the first thing." Your eyes widened as he smirked, watching the realization flood your face. "Now... unless you're not into it- which I know you definitely were into it." He eased you off his lap and stood up. "You left one room out of your tour."

You shook your head and grabbed his hand before tugging him towards your bedroom, chewing on your lip. "I don't look the same... my body, it's different" You told him once you got to your room, clearing your throat a little as he moved closer to you. "Well.. obviously, Querida." He chuckled softly and grabbed your chin, lifting your head to look at him. "Tuviste un bebé. Mi bebé." You had a baby. My baby. He whispered softly, nudging his nose against yours lightly. "It's loved and grown and cared for a little baby." He added, his free hand sliding up your curves, over your stomach, and finally up to palm one of your breasts, making your breath hitch.

You swallowed thickly and chewed on your lip. "I'm bigger now, and I've got stretch marks and cellulite-" "Your body is proud of it's accomplishments, that's all that is, showing the world how strong you are." He purred softly, tilting your head up more before he leaned down and pressed his lips to your neck, sliding them over the soft skin with gentle kisses. "You should be just as proud."

He walked you towards your bed, his hands coming up to pull the zipper of your dress down your back, and then slipping it over your shoulders, groaning softly as he watched it fall to the floor, taking your hands to help you step out of it before turning you around, a wide grin on his face as he took a step back. "Mamacita.." He purred softly, sliding his eyes over you hungrily. "Mírate. Fucking beautiful." look at you.

"Javi... you're still wearing your clothes." He chuckled. "I know, Mamacita. Wait on the bed, get comfortable." You pouted and he chuckled. "You're not going to until I let you undress me, are you?" You shook your head defiantly and he rolled his eyes fondly before pulling you in. "Fine." He whispered before kissing you softly.

You smiled against his lips, your hands coming up to pull his tie loose and toss it somewhere, quickly followed by that jacket before you started unbuttoning his shirt, not as fast as you'd rid him of his tie and jacket, and when you finally had it untucked and off his shoulders you pulled away and pushed him back a little.

Your lips separated with a soft smack and you could've sworn you heard Javi whine. He frowned at first, thinking you wanted to stop, and then he saw the look in your eyes, how you were eating him up like he'd done you moments ago. Then, you reached out and grabbed his belt buckle, tugging him forward and kissing him again.

He groaned loudly and grabbed your hips tightly, moaning as your hands tugged his belt open and out of the loops. Once his slacks were pushed down he stepped out of them and pushed you back towards your bed, watching you fall down on it with a soft groan. "Been dreamin' about doin' this again for years, baby.” He climbed over you, pressing a kiss to your neck.

You shuddered and wrapped your arms around his neck loosely, tilting your head so he’d have more room. “Me too, Javi.” You said softly. “Haven’t been with anybody since you.” You bit your lip as he leaned back to look down at you. “What?”

You shook your head a little and shifted. “Haven’t wanted to. Haven’t needed to.” You said softly. “I felt bad, Y’know Valeria’s just a baby.. it would’ve felt wrong.” You chewed on your lip as you looked up at him, swallowing thickly. “And when I was pregnant… well I was pregnant, Y’know? Fat and sweaty and gross.” Javi shook his head. “You couldn’t be gross. Ever.” He gripped your chin tightly and leaned down to kiss you. "Talk down about my baby mama-" he muttered against your neck disapprovingly, making you laugh softly. "Should be ashamed." He added

“Bet you looked gorgeous pregnant.” Javi kissed your forehead, then your cheeks, and finally your chin before leaning back again. “Would’ve been all over you, Querida.” He purred, nudging his nose against your cheek. "Not gonna miss the second one."

"Second one?" You teased with a soft laugh. Javi hummed and nodded, kissing your neck. "Mhm. Gonna stay around, make you mine, make both of y'all mine. Have a big happy family." You felt your cheeks warm up, smiling up at him.

"you sure you want that? Wanna be stuck in little Laredo with me and a house full of babies?" Javi grinned widely and leaned down to kiss you. "As long as you're the mama." He purred softly before trailing his lips down your torso, peering up at you.

"For right now, though... we can settle for this. For our one little baby." He said softly, nipping lightly at your skin as you shuddered. "Can worry about filling you up later, after I put a ring on that finger." You didn't know how truthful he was being, if he actually wanted to marry you or if he was just overwhelmed with all these familiar emotions. But you hoped he meant it, prayed he meant it.

His lips ghosted over your core, still covered in the soft black lace you'd put on earlier- just because you weren't expecting him to see you like this, doesn't mean you can't wear something to give you some confidence. You let out a soft gasp and looked down at him, swallowing thickly. The only orgasming you'd done since Valeria was born was from masturbating, and it wasn't a recurring thing because Valeria often ended up sleeping in your bed before morning.

Lately you hadn't been able to make yourself cum at all, too busy caring for Valeria, working, or cleaning up the house. Of course, night time was usually when you took your chance, but Val was having trouble sleeping lately, which usually meant by ten she was knocking on your door and asking for milk or to sleep with you, and you could never say no to her.

"Querida?" Javi's voice drifted to your ears and you looked down at him from the ceiling, blinking a little. "You okay?" You nodded quickly. "Uh-huh. I'm okay." Javi chuckled softly. "Alright, looked like you were somewhere else for a second there- I hope I'm not boring you already." His tone was teasing but you could see a flash of something else, too, doubt maybe? Insecurity?

You widened your eyes and shook your head rapidly. "No- absolutely not." You laughed softly. "Sorry- just- been a few months since I've been able to get enough time to myself to.. y'know enjoy myself to completion." Javi's eyes widened. "I guess that's what I was thinking about."

"Not even in the shower?" you shrugged a little. "My showers hardly ever exceed 15 minutes and honestly I'm pretty sure Valeria would literally run away towards something more entertaining if I took too long." Javi laughed softly and nodded like he understood where you were coming from.

"Okay-I promise I'm not gonna be in my head anymore. I'm here. completely here." Javi smiled and leaned up to press a soft kiss to your lips before he was diving back down again.

He was taunting you a bit this time, pressing feather light kisses to your core as he slowly tugged the panties down your legs, humming as he scraped his teeth lightly against your skin, chuckling softly when your thighs twitched as he went over the stretchmarks, looking up at you with a smirk.

You couldn't make yourself look away if Jesus himself came down and told you it would save the world. Damn the world, Javier Peña was between your legs, sliding his tongue over the insides of your thighs before finally, finally putting it where you wanted it and sliding it firmly through your folds, flattening his tongue completely as you shuddered.

"Javi..." you moaned and dropped your head back, your eyelids finally fluttering shut. You whined though when as you'd pushed up towards javi's face, he was pushing you back down against the mattress and holding you there firmly, looking at you through his lashes.

He was holding your clit in his mouth, tongue massaging the sensitive bundle of nerves when you felt a finger nudge at your hole and then slip in ever so slowly. Your back arched and you moaned, your eyelids fluttering but not really opening.

Javi was moaning against you, pushing his hips down into the mattress as he groaned, sucking on your clit happily. The noises he was making were driving you up the wall, sending vibrations through you that had your legs shaking, whimpering happily and tangling your fingers tightly in his hair. "J-Javi.. fuck." You moaned, chewing on your lip as you looked down at him.

"Feels so good, Javi." Javi smirked a little against you, humming softly. He held eye contact with you, one hand still firmly gripping your hip as he slid a second finger into you and curling them up.

You let out a soft gasp, your hips jerking up a bit as he started thrusting and curling his fingers, his mouth still sucking on your clit while simultaneously massaging it with his tongue. His fingers were thrusting in and out of you, curling and twisting as he fucked you with them, his eyes glued to yours.

Eventually you started to tug on his hair, trying to bring him up with weak whines. Javi, who remembered how you'd begged him to kiss you that night, latching your lips to his whenever you had the chance, immediately caught on and let you pull him up into a breathy kiss. That night it took him no time to realized how much you liked to be kissed, how your breath would leave you and you would let out the cutest sound, he found it endearing, not to mention ironic because even though he didn't seem like the type- Javi was big on kissing.

There was something about the vanilla taste of most lipglosses, the soft stickiness it left behind, that made his heart purr and curl up like a warm kitten. Maybe it was the implication of a good time, or even just the soft intimacy of having someone kiss him, want him for something that didn't involve shoving a gun in someone's face or putting cold metal cuffs around their wrists.

Eating someone out was a close second to kissing them, a very very close second, and as much as he loved being buried in a tight, warm, wet pussy, those two things blew fucking out of the water. But, in his six year journey of thinking about you all the time, he came to realize that if he tried the scale on you, tried to think of which he preferred more, he couldn't even compare them.

It was corny as shit and if he thought about it too much it freaked him out, but evertyhing with you was his favorite thing. He wanted it all, all the time.

As he kissed you he eased in a third finger and pressed his thumb against your clit and slowly circling it, humming softly as you moaned against his mouth, wrapping your arms around his neck to hold him closer to you since he was still holding you down with that other hand.

With Javi this close to you, his cock laying heavily against you, his fingers fucking and massaging inside you, when he rediscovered your gspot you'd twitched around his fingers, he felt your nails dig into his shoulders, and your jaw went slack, breaking the kiss, but with no sound actually coming out.

"Ahí está. Apuesto a que me extrañó /tanto/." There she is. I bet she missed me /so much/. He purred, continuing to massage your g-spot, watching the way your eyelids fluttered and then finally closed, brows furrowing as you let out breathy moans, his name occasionally slipping out. "Doing so good for me, mamacita. Squeezing my fingers so well." Your stomach twitched when his warm precum started to dribble onto your stomach, ears burning at his words. "Javi." You shuddered. "You're being vulgar." You said softly.

"Oh, Querida... but she loves when i talk about her." He purred, starting to add more pressure to your clit and gspot, making you moan louder as your chest pressed up into his, your nails dragging down his back an inch before they stopped. "She just cries and throbs for me~" You shuddered and whimpered softly.

You wanted to have some kind of upperhand here, wanted to return the favor, so you gathered his precum from where it was pooling on your torso and gripped the base of his cock, watching as his eyes squeezed shut and his jaw clenched. "Fuck- you don't have to. Could probably cum just from this."

You shook your hand and drug your hand up slowly, watching the way his shoulders shuddered and his muscles trembled under the skin. The same way they had then when you touched him, the same way you'd felt them trembling that first night, and again at dinner, and again when you were dancing. Javi's muscles quaked every time you touched him, sometimes sending a full shiver through him, other times making his fingers twitch or his hand curl up and rub his palm like he was squeezing a stress ball.

"Wanna make you cum, Javi." You moaned and pushed down on his fingers, not matching the speed he was using. "Want you to cum in my mouth, though." You whined. "Only got to taste it once." He groaned and dropped his face into your neck, fucking into your hand a little, stopping his hand in favor of throughly massaging your gspot and clit with the same circular motions. When his hand slid from your hip and to the bottom of your abdomen, immediately pressing down, not enough to hurt you, but hard enough that everything felt a hundred times better.

"Javi- Javi I-I'm gonna..." your hand was moving sloppier now, a little slower as your orgasm started to demand its release from its six month prison. "Joder, sí, mamacita. Cum para mí. Empapa mis dedos- mierda- quiero ver esa cara bonita cuando te corras. Keep your eyes open." Fuck, yes. Cum for me. Soak my fingers- shit- I want to see that pretty face when you cum. He pressed his forehead against yours, groaning happily as he lazily fucked your hand, you wanted to taste him and he was happy to let that happen, but your hand felt so fucking good, so until you came down he was going to take a little advantage of that.

You came with a loud cry, arching your back as your legs trembled and you felt an unfamilar gushing feeling. You did your best to keep your eyes open, looking up into Javi's big brown ones made it a little easier. "There you go, baby. Fuck, look at you. Fucking gorgeous, especially when you cum." You shuddered and whined. "Did- did I-" "You did." Javi chuckled softly and kissed you softly as he circled your clit slowly, when your hips jerked away he stopped and kissed your neck. "Did so good for me, too." "You were trying to make me do that." "Well, duh. You said you haven't cum in months. Had to make the first one after a dry spell mind-blowing."

You blinked rapidly and shook your head slowly before kissing him deeply, sitting up and cupping his cheeks before you pulled away. "Sit back." He grinned and did as he was told, leaning back against your headboard and watching as you got between his legs, licking his lips slowly.

He set his hand on the back of your head, not pushing or tugging on your hair, just holding his hand there. You felt his other hand grasp at your fingertips and you coudn't help but smile against the skin of his stomach, sliding your hand up to lace your fingers together.

When you finally got to where he wanted your mouth, lips grazing over the length of his cock, he gasped and dropped his head back, muttering something in Spanish that was too quiet for you to hear good enough. You smiled and hummed softly before using your free hand to grasp the base of his cock before wrapping your lips around the tip and slowly sliding down, taking him all the way down your throat with just a little resistance, your throat not used to be stuffed so full.

"Fuck- look at you." Javi groaned, his brows furrowing as he looked down at you. "So pretty with my cock in your mouth." His hips jerked a bit, making you gag. "Joder. Lo siento, cariño. Lo siento." Fuck. I'm sorry, honey. I'm sorry. He said softly, forcing himself to settle his hips back down against the mattress.

Once you felt your throat relax a bit around him you breathed in through your nose and started bobbing your head up and down, looking up towards him through your lashes. The sight was heavenly, Javi's eyes squeezed shut, his chest heaving as he panted and moaned, his hand gripping your hair while the other squeezed your hand, muttering under his breath.

With each pull up you pressed your tongue to the vein on the underside of his cock. When you got to his tip you'd stop there, focus on sucking there while your hand focused on the rest of his shaft, your tongue circled and pressed under the edge. Javi groaned loudly and gripped your hair a little tighter. "Maldita sea. Echaba de menos esa boca. Me arrastraría por el infierno sobre mis manos y rodillas si pudiera sentir esa boca para siempre." God damn. I missed that mouth. I'd crawl through hell on my hands and knees if I could feel that mouth forever. He dropped his chin to look down at you, pupils blown and eyes glossy.

He looked so pretty, sweat beading on his forehead and temples. You wondered briefly if you should've turned the air up a little, but ignored the thought and went back to bobbing your head, sucking harder whenever you got to his tip, your hand following your mouth's path.

It wasn't long before Javi's breathing got harsher, his moans became weak grunts and whimpers, and he was spilling into your mouth, his hips jerking up as his hand tugged on your hair and the other squeezed your hand. You were quick to swallow as much of it as you could, some of it spilling from your mouth and out the corners.

Javi looked down at you, panting heavily and shaking his head before he pulled you off of his cock with a soft pop. "C'mere." He mumbled, humming softly before sticking his tongue out and licking his cum from the corners of your mouth before kissing you deeply.

You moaned and kissed him back eagerly, grabbing onto his shoulders lightly as he wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you close to him. "So beautiful, baby. So good at that, too. Fuck." He said softly, peppering you in little kisses as he laid the two of you back.

"You'll stay, right?" You looked up at him and he smiled softly. "Of course I will." He said softly. "We'll relax a little, calm down, and then we'll go take a shower, get some water, and then we can come back to bed, and get some rest."

You smiled and nodded happily, leaning in to kiss him again before laying your head in the crook of his neck. You laid there for about ten minutes before you showered, got some water, made sure to use the bathroom.

And then you were curled up with Javier again, curled up into his side as you nuzzled his neck, sighing happily. His hands were tracing your back like he'd done so long ago. Except, this time, Javi wasn't hesitant, didnt let minutes pass before he pulled you closer, his fingertips made full contact with your skin. His other arm was wrapped tightly around your waist, his lips pressing kisses to the top of your head.

You fell asleep pretty quickly, Javi's heart beat in his chest, his warm body pressed tightly against yours lulling you off faster than you would've liked.

You hoped Javi meant what he said earlier, about staying and being a better man for his family, you wanted him around, wanted to see him care for your daughter, kiss her booboos and soothe her after a nightmare. You wanted him to be there for every birthday, every christmas, every thanksgiving. You wanted Javi at every holiday and function you'd ever have to go to. You just hoped he wanted the same thing.

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Taglist:

@wonwoosthetic @stonerlaur4 @picketniffler

#pedro pascal #pedrohub #narcos #javier peña x reader smut #javier peña smut #javier peña narcos #javier peña x reader #javier peña #muñequita part three

[mackenzielovee]

protection (3) — ari levinson

summary: Ari and your father have been business partners for ages, and it seems that he doesn't care for you. This doesn't stop you from trying; scheming to make the older man fall for you the same way the rest of your father's men have, too.

pairing: dbf! ari x reader

warnings: mentions of blood, death, guns, violence, smut (kissing, grinding, sexual language/content)

wc: 3.2k

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     For hours, you feel too humiliated to even try to venture out of your room. You try not to think about how Ari made you feel — how he tested you, embarrassed you, but made it seem as if he was doing it all for your safety. 

Your mind reels as you try to figure it all out. Figure him out. Eventually, you resign to thinking you never will. That doesn’t mean you’re willing to stop trying to get to him. 

It’s dark out when you decide to venture down the stairs. You can hear your father and his men in his office, and your skin crawls at the thought of facing Ari again today. You’re sure you’ve pushed him far enough, and maybe, just maybe, it would be wise not to push any further.

You hurry across the house and into the kitchen; socks sliding against the glossy wood floors. You’d taken a bath, just as your father suggested, then put on black shorts and an oversized tee shirt you’d stolen from an ex-boyfriend. 

Your stomach growls, and you begin to dig through the fridge in hopes of finding something; leftovers, microwavable meals, or even just something to snack on.

“There’s pasta on the top shelf.”

You tense and spin around, finding Javier standing on the opposite side of the kitchen, watching you. Even in the darkness that surrounds you, you can make out a cut on his bottom lip and a bruise around his eye. 

“Javi,” you breathe, “What happened to your face?”

“Ari,” he replies, then looks to the floor, “You okay?”

“Me?”

“Yes, you,” he nods, “I’ve never gotten used to being shot at. Even in my line of work. I can’t imagine how much it must have rattled you.”

You swallow, but you suddenly realize that there’s no pang in your chest. There’s no hear sunken feeling; no dread, anxiety, fear, or anything. You just feel numb. Before now, you hadn’t even realized the lack of emotions you felt about the day — unrelated to Ari and his behavior. 

“I’m fine,” you squeak, and it’s obvious Javier doesn’t believe you. 

“Well, I’ll be here when you’re not,” he promises. 

You frown, “He hit you?”

Javier finally allows himself to look at you now, then nods once to answer your question. 

“Three times,” he explains, “It’s not a big deal.”

You shake your head defiantly and flip on the kitchen light, then walk over to where Javier stands. You notice him looking you up and down, but you don’t call attention to it. 

“He can’t just hit you and get away with it,” you mumble, “Especially after he had a gun to your head.”

Javier smirks, “I’m fine, bonita. Truly.”

“I should give him a piece of my mind,” you grunt, crossing your arms over your chest. 

“No, you shouldn’t,” Javier chuckles. 

You open your mouth to speak, but the sound that travels through the air makes your blood stop cold in your veins. 

“Give who a piece of your mind?”

Javier’s smile falls and he immediately steps back from you, tucking his hands into the pockets of his dress pants. You spin slowly, coming face to face with Ari for the first time in mere hours. His glare is harsh and his jaw is clenched as he looks between you and Javier. Like a wave, the fear washes over you. It registers immediately that you only seem to feel anything when Ari’s in the vicinity — even if those feelings aren’t good ones. 

His gaze is strong as he stares at you, seemingly begging for you to try him. Again. You inhale deeply, then shake your head. 

“Nobody,” you mumble. 

He nods, but his jaw ticks victoriously, “Javier, get the car ready. We’re leaving in ten minutes.”

“Yes sir,” Javier replies automatically, stealing one quick glance at you before adding, “Goodnight, Miss Y/N.”

“Goodnight, Javi,” you whisper. 

The room falls silent, but it seems that Ari finds comfort in that. He leans up against the doorframe and crosses his arms, following in Javier’s steps and not bothering to hide the way he looks you up and down. The idea of him looking at you that way makes you squirm, and you let it show. 

He smirks as you fidget with your hands, doing your best to avoid his eyes. 

“Are you still mad at me?” you ask, your voice sounding weak and powerless compared to his. 

“Yes,” he replies, “Are you still mad at me?”

You bite the inside of your cheek, finally daring to meet his eyes. Your heart feels like it’s burning up in your chest when he looks at you, and your mind races as you try to figure out why Ari has such an impact on you. 

“Yes,” you mumble. 

He nods, “I’m not going to apologize.”

“Neither am I.”

You watch as his lips tip up, but he lets the expression fall. Then, he takes a step forward, then another, watching as you move back. He continues his pursuit forward until your back meets the counter, trapping you in.

“I’m not asking you to,” he rasps. 

Your throat is suddenly dry, and all you can smell, all you can see, is him. He’s too close, and every alarm bell you’ve ever had is blaring inside of you. Instead of moving, you allow him to take the remaining steps to you, then set his hands on the counter on either side of your body. He’s caging you where you stand, maintaining eye contact and showing no fear. 

“Are you flirting with me, Mr. Levinson?”

You know it’s a risk, but it’s your plan. To lure him in. You count yourself victorious, given that it’s only been one day, and he’s already so close. You refuse to show fear, even though your heart is racing out of your chest. Calm, cool, collected. Make him sweat. 

“Like you’ve been flirting with me?” he counters, raising a brow. When you don’t answer, he dips his head down, requesting an answer and adding, “Huh?”

“Maybe,” you answer shyly. 

His smirk widens, and you swear he moves even closer to you before he stands up straight, nodding in approval when you follow him with your eyes. 

“What, you’re gonna play the game and then get all shy?” he teases, “I’m falling for it, sweetheart.”

You furrow your brow, “Falling for what?”

“For your little game,” he shrugs, his hand dragging along the counter and ghosting over your waist, “You’re clearly in desperate need of attention. You’re upset because your Daddy doesn’t give you enough—”

You shove him then, realizing Ari’s playing his own game that you don’t know anything about. He chuckles dryly and stumbles back, but catches himself and recovers quickly.

“Fuck you, Ari,” you say. 

He laughs dryly, “You ought to know better than to speak to me like that.”

“I’m speaking to you like this because you’re being an asshole,” you fire back, “I’m not desperate, and I don’t have Daddy issues.”

Ari snorts, “Okay, sure. And I’m not about to go shoot a guy in the head for looking at you the wrong way today.”

Your eyes widen at those words. Ari shakes his head and runs a hand through his beard, sighing with frustration as you stand in front of him. Motionless and fearful. 

“You’re going to kill him?” you ask quietly.

“He tried to kill you,” he replies instantly. 

You grow quiet at that; unwilling to beg for a man’s life when Ari’s standing in front of you like this. He radiates strength and power, and even though a small part of you is afraid of him, a bigger part is squirming because of how much he makes you feel. 

The idea of Ari killing the man from the street today brings a pit to your stomach, but not for the reason it should. 

“What if he tries to kill you first?” you question. 

His smirk returns, “Then, I guess you’ll be free to run off into the sunset with your precious Javi.”

You look up at him, but you don’t verbally respond. He licks his lips as he stares down at you, both of you feeling as if silence is a better communicator than words. 

He doesn’t step back, doesn’t attempt to move or give you more space. He merely remains still, remains focused, and leaves the next move up to you. You know you shouldn’t take it — not after what he said about you having Daddy issues and essentially calling you desperate. But, you can’t help yourself. He’s right there in front of you, and you justify your action by telling yourself that it’s all part of getting the big, bad Ari Levinson to fall to his knees. 

He freezes when you press the palm of your hand to his broad chest — clearly not expecting this in the slightest. He’s warm, you think, and strong. Your lips tip up as you feel the power come back to you.

“You’ll be careful, won’t you, Mr. Levinson?” 

He swallows, not daring to move a muscle. Your smirk widens as he works to form a response, although his eyes never leave yours. 

“No,” he answers, stepping closer and drawing your palm further up his chest, “Not with the motherfucker who tried to kill you today.”

Your insides burn as you imagine what Ari is capable of. Even so, you don’t bother dropping your hand. 

“I’ll wait for you to come home,” you whisper, watching his eyes drop to your lips, “You’ll need someone to clean you up, right?”

You watch every thought fall from his head except for one. Mindlessly, Ari nods. You smirk, knowing you have him right where you want him.

Until you don’t.

All at once, Ari snaps right back into it — and it takes you too long to realize that he never lost control at all. With his hand placed lightly around your throat, he pulls you away from the counter and over to the pantry door. He roughly sets you up against it and boxes you in again, then leans down so that his lips are only inches from yours. 

“That’s real cute,” he murmurs. 

You swallow roughly, gasping when he presses his body up against yours. The entire facade slips, and all you can think about is how close he is, how good he smells, and how much you want him. 

“What is?” you ask breathlessly. 

“You,” he replies, “Thinking you can play with me. You should know better, baby.”

Frantically, you shake your head, the feeling of being in trouble somehow clouding your judgment. You’ve forgotten the game, and all you can think about is him. 

“I do,” you whisper. 

He raises a brow, “You do, huh?”

“Mhm,” you hum, leaning closer. 

He grins, “Prove it.”

Ari pulls his head back when you rise on your tip-toes, desperate to prove it to him in any way possible. You can’t seem to think of anything besides kissing him, feeling him, being this close to him. 

“Ari,” you whine, trying to tug him in by the end of his shirt. 

You watch the look in Ari’s eyes change as you say his name, and for a moment, you think that’s the key. The answer. Just say his name, and he’ll look at you like he’s ready to drop to his knees. You’re sure he almost does, but stops when he hears your father’s office door open down the hall. His voice is faint, but the sound of his Italian loafers against the wood floor tells you he’s coming to the kitchen. 

“I’ll come back when he’s dead,” Ari whispers to you, “I can’t fucking think straight knowing he’s out there thinking about you like that.”

You bite your lip to hide a smile, then run your hand down his chest. He groans deeply, but doesn’t stop you. 

“Will you bring me back a souvenir?”

Ari’s jaw ticks, “If there’s anything left of him.”

You smile, and so does Ari. Your father rounds the corner just as Ari takes three large steps back, not breaking eye contact with you for a second. 

“Oh, hello, my love,” your father greets you, “What are you doing up so late?”

You give your father a convincing smile, “I just needed a snack.”

He steps over to you and kisses your forehead, clearly unsuspecting. Javier leans in the doorway of the kitchen, but you can’t find it in you to look at him. He’d left you alone with Ari several minutes ago, and you still haven’t come any closer to making something to eat. 

“Eat whatever you’re hungry for, darling. We have some business to take care of tonight, but Vick will be in the house if you need anything, and Derek and Mateo are at the front gate. Get some good rest, okay?”

You nod, “Okay, Dad.”

He beams, then kisses your forehead once more. When he turns back to Ari and Javier, you allow your eyes to float back up. Ari’s watching you; fists clenched tightly at his side.

“Let’s get moving, boys,” he says. 

Javier nods and walks off without a word, and your father follows. Ari lingers, stealing one last glance at you before swallowing and turning his back. 

“Be careful, Mr. Levinson,” you say quietly, only for him to hear. 

He turns and raises a teasing brow, then licks his lips. You ignore the feelings that stir in your stomach. 

“Get some rest,” Ari says, repeating your father’s words before adding, “You’re going to need it.”

     Your mind doesn’t stop buzzing after Ari leaves. You’d watched him from the window as he climbed into the bulletproof, black SUV, dripping power and dominance with every step. He doesn’t look back, not even once, and you swear you can feel anxiety swirling at the thought of him not returning to the house. 

After they leave, you’re far too anxious to eat, so you end up wandering around the house. Vick stays in your father’s office, and you don’t even attempt to bother him. After an hour of deafening silence, you head back upstairs to your room, where you do your best to distract yourself. 

Around one o’clock in the morning, you fall asleep. Keeping your eyes open proves to be too difficult, and your head falls to the right as you sit up in your bed. 

     It’s not until almost four o’clock that you hear the doors slamming and the boots against the wood. Your father barks out orders, and the second you register his voice, your eyes go wide. If he’s home, that means Ari is, too. 

You scramble off your bed and over to your door, pulling it open without a second thought. You can hear your father talking downstairs, but it all fades quickly. 

Ari appears at the top of the stairs, and the breath escapes from your lungs. His eyes take their time traveling up, then down, and finally, he looks right at you. 

You take in his appearance; bruised and bloody knuckles, blood spatter on his face, neck, and shirt, and dirt covering the rest of him. He’s dirty, but you don’t care one bit. 

“Here,” he says gruffly, walking over to where you remain frozen, “A souvenir.”

Obediently, you hold your hand out and take what he offers without even considering what it might be. When you feel the cool metal touch your palm, you look down. 

“What is this?” you ask quietly.

“His wedding band,” Ari answers, emotionless, “He’s dead. You know what that means?”

You snort to yourself as you go through the possibilities he could say next. Even though you should be repulsed at the idea of holding a dead man’s wedding band, you’re not. Strangely, it’s because Ari gifted it to you. 

“What?” you whisper, looking back up at him. 

He steps closer and lowers his voice, “That means, the only man fantasizing about you tonight will be me.”

You don’t even have to think before you’re reaching for him, tracing over the dried blood on his shirt with your perfectly manicured finger. 

“You don’t have to fantasize.”

That seems to be all the permission Ari needs, because you’re not at all prepared for the way he steps forward and grabs you, picking you up and pushing your back against the wall in one quick motion. You grasp and lock your legs around his waist, then your arms around his torso. His mouth meets your jawline, neck, and collarbones, leaving traces of harsh, wet kisses and bite marks in their wake. His breath is hot on your skin, but you love the feeling more than you could ever describe. 

“I fucking knew it,” he groans into your neck, “Skin’s so fucking soft. You like teasing the fuck out of me, baby?”

“Mhm,” you hum, unable to form words, “Ari—”

“Shh,” he hushes you, pressing another kiss, then another, then another to your jaw and cheeks, “I’m gonna stand here and savor every bit, and you’re gonna let me. Understood?”

You grind your hips against his abs, and he pushes his midsection closer into you, forcing a moan from your throat. You let him do whatever he wants; doing exactly as he ordered you to do and remaining quiet and still for him. Your fingers comb through his hair and tug, which bring short groans out of his throat. 

It isn’t until he bites down on the right side of your neck that you let out a loud sound, a moan of his name, that he covers your mouth with his large hand. 

“Oh, baby,” he chuckles against your neck, “You want your Dad to hear how desperate you are for me? How willingly you spread your legs for his business partner?”

“Ari,” you whine, “Want you.”

“I want Javier to hear you,” he continues, ignoring your words and the way you grind against him, desperate for friction, “I want him to hear your weak little gasps every fucking time I touch you. He’s never heard them before, right, baby?”

“No,” you say immediately, “Don’t want Javi. Want you.”

“Aw,” he grins, his smile and his tone patronizing, “You’re so needy. You just want attention, huh?”

“Yes,” you pant. 

He grins, and you feel hopeful. You imagine him carrying you to your bedroom, stripping off every article of clothing, and keeping you in your bed until the sun comes up. You move closer, wanting to kiss him, but he pulls back. Just as you start to frown, he reaches around and unlocks your legs from his waist, then practically drops you onto the floor. 

“Don’t you dare forget this,” he says deeply, “How I can reduce you to fucking nothing in under five minutes. You think you hold the power with your little shorts and that fucking smile? Not a chance, baby.”

Your eyes widen and your lips form into a pout — Ari leaving you feeling embarrassed and humiliated for the second time today pushing you too far. 

“Ari?” you question, watching his smirk deepen. 

“Enjoy your souvenir,” he replies coldly, then turns away, “It’s the last one you’ll get from me for a while.”

He descends down the stairs without another glance or word, leaving you standing there, desperate, sad, and needy. You watch him go, and let the embarrassment settle in your chest. You’re not used to this — the feeling of being rejected or denied. Although Ari challenges you, no part of you wants to face these feelings. You wanted it to all be easy, and Ari Levinson is proving to be very, very difficult. Especially when it registers as you walk back into your bedroom that he didn’t even once kiss you on the lips.

a/n: i hope you enjoyed! leave me some feedback if you can or want to! reblogs are appreciated :)

*i no longer have a taglist , follow @mackupdates for updates!

#ari levinson #ari levison x reader #ari levinson x reader #ari levinson x you #the red sea diving resort #the red sea diving resort fic #chris evans character fanfiction #chris evans characters #chris evans character x reader #ari

[thelightsandtheroses]

Secret Smile: A Tale of Two Reunions (Chapter Seven)

Secret Smile | Javier Peña x female reader

Summary: Before returning to Colombia to get things right this time, Javi’s childhood best friend asks him to keep an eye out for his sister while they’re both stationed in the embassy. Only you don’t need Javier to keep an eye you her. Your role as a new legal advisor is all about keeping an eye on him after all Sparks fly, lines will be drawn and broken and there’s everything to lose.

Word Count: 5.9 k Chapter Warnings: 18+ blog, language, mentions of alcohol, reader has a nickname (Blue) but no physical descriptors are used, depression, past sexual harassment and sexism, past toxic workplace with pretty terrible HR management, un beta’d. Author's Notes: Thanks, as always, for all your lovely comments and reblogs to this fic so far. It means the world to me. I've been very nervous about this chapter but I hope it works?

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Javi’s never spent much time in Florida before. Besides growing up in Texas, most of his working career has been spent in Colombia, or briefly Mexico at the start. He’s had a couple of meetings in DC, most notably the time he thought he would be fired and instead was offered this promotion. 

Perks of the job, he supposes. Join the DEA and you’ll get to explore new places while stopping the bad guys; that was how it had been sold to him back in the day.

It’s draining though. Today he’s been in three different countries, taken two flights, plus he chased Jurado across a town like he still thought he was in his twenties.  At least there’s only an hour time difference here. At least they get tonight to reset. You and Javi can’t fly back to Colombia until the morning so Javi and you have been booked into a nearby hotel.

You’re still with the lawyers from Justice. In fact, you were the one who had suggested he go back to the hotel, that why didn’t he check in with Steve while he was here, make the most of the unexpected delay? There isn’t anything else he can do right now.

So now he’s at the hotel bar, having just finished a decidedly average burger and fries that was the only meal that met the new expenses policy limits, making sure to pocket his receipt while he remembers, and you’re probably still working.

Since he came back to Colombia, since you came back into his life, he’s only really seen you working in the embassy. He’s watched you make calls, plans, smooth paths and write paperwork. He’s never seen you like he has today though; in full lawyer mode.

You’re impressive.

There were other lawyers there and waiting but it was you Javi was watching, you who took control of the situation and pushed for solutions. You who spoke to them to prepare the testimony from Jurado, who had written the deal out already.

Then when Javi walked back in the room some time later and saw Jurado’s lawyer, he knew. He saw your face, the frustration clear, but you still tried.

He watched you dodge and weave through Starkman’s arguments, to try and make the deal still happen. You were calm, methodical, collected. Every now and then you’d meet Javi’s gaze, looking desperately like you wanted to roll your eyes at him over some unwelcome road bump and then turning your attention back to the moment as thought you had never looked at him.

You’ve both changed so much since Laredo; he remembers you there as shy, nervous, passionate about the things you loved, yes, but never like this.

It’s not enough though.

All that effort, running around Curacao in the sweltering heat and damn near falling of a roof like an idiot, all of it is for nothing. Javi has a feeling it doesn’t matter how skilled you are as a lawyer; it’s all going nowhere without Christina. Jurado won’t talk until she’s safe. Javi doesn’t even blame him.

Javi wonders what that’s like, loving someone that much. Though he wonders how much love there is to expose your wife to that situation, to use her passport to further your work. She was clearly unhappy when Javi spoke to her, he could see the loneliness in her eyes. The Jurados are truly in a sorry mess now.

Javi’s time in Colombia is one step forward and five steps back. Franklin’s wife still hasn’t arrived at the embassy. Javi swears Christina was on board, she was ready when he spoke to her on the runway - she was meant to be on her way so he can’t see her going to  Jurado’s employers instead. No, there’s a rising sense of dread and worry coating his skin like sweat. Things are only going to get worse. Stoddard and the team are trying to find where she might be in the city, to see if they can get her and bring her to the US.

There’s nothing he can do from here right now though.  He’s a passenger right now, until tomorrow, until they land back in Bogotá.  He’s powerless and he hates it.

He notices Steve instantly as he walks over to Javi’s table in the smoking section. Javi moves his empty plate to one side before standing up to greet his old partner.

Steve looks well - being away from Colombia suits him. The last time they’d spoken, Steve had said that things were a lot better with him and Connie, that Olivia was in preschool and happy, that being home was working for him. He’s a DEA consultant now; he trains new agents, provides case studies or advice on how to approach a case. 

He’s not in the field though.

Steve fought his battle. He was there when they took down Escobar.

They order drinks and make the initial small talk before Steve proudly shows Javi the latest photo of Olivia in his wallet.  If anything is a stark reminder of the years that have passed, the sizeable amount of Javi’s life dedicated to this war, it’s seeing that Olivia isn’t a baby anymore. She’s a child with her hair in bunches and a wide toothy grin on her face. Javi wonders if she even remembers Colombia now, if she would remember him or any of her time there.

A few minutes later, Steve takes a gulp from his beer and looks at Javi carefully. His expression is one Javi recognises; this is the moment when Steve is getting to the crux of whatever he wanted to raise.

“I can’t believe they wanted you back,” he says lightly.

“Me either. Thought I was being fired when I went to DC after it all went down.”

“You’re a good agent, Javier. You know we couldn’t have - we couldn’t have done what we did without you. I just still can’t get over that you actually went back there,” Steve continues and Javi gets the sense that Steve means a lot more than just that the DEA had invited him back. “That you’ve spent months back there again and what - you’re in for a few more, another year of this?”

He’s not sure how to respond that, what he’s supposed to say about the albatross of obligation and redemption that’s bound so tightly around his neck that it’s become a noose.

“Job wasn’t done, Steve. The Cali godfathers, all of that - I want to get it right. Besides, I’m not sure now I’m back that they actually did want me back.”

“What do you mean?”

Javi stubs out his cigarette. “They wanted a poster boy.”

Steve laughs at that, shakes his head. “And they thought of you?”

“Hey, of the two of us, I am obviously the better looking one.”

“In my first week in Bogotá, you asked me to sneak papers down my trousers out of a secure lock up.”

“And I stand by that, Steve.”

“How the fuck would they ever have thought you’d just sit there and take that?”

Javi lights a cigarette and shrugs, offering the packet to Steve who shakes his head.

“I quit.”

“I did try the gum,” Javi admits before taking a long drag of his cigarette.

“That seems to be working out well for you,” Steve says dryly.

“Fucking brilliantly,” he says, raising his eyebrows.

“So, they wanted a figurehead, not - not you. How’s that going? You didn’t answer me. I know you, Javi, I know you wouldn’t do that.”

“They have tried to make it harder - fucking Stechner’s been - himself. Um, there’s a lawyer who works in tandem with Justice and the Ambassador and is my - unofficial liaison? I don’t know. Unofficially, they wanted her to keep an eye on me.” It feels like a terrible way to describe Blue, to introduce who she is to Steve.

Steve puts his glass down and meets Javi’s gaze straight on.

“What the fuck?”

“Yeah. It’s fine though. It turns out I knew her so -”

“Oh god, Javi. She’s not someone you slept with before, is she?”

“Wow, do you really think so little of me?”

Steve raises his eyebrows at Javi and yeah, maybe he knows where Steve is coming from. The thing is, despite his reputation, he doesn’t feel like he was as much as a rogue as people wanted to paint him.

“No, she’s from Laredo,” he says.  “Actually, I was good friends with her brother growing up so I’ve known her a long time. Still am friends with her brother. She’s a good person, Steve. She wants the same thing as me. Blue wants us to get the godfathers, shut it down. We need to get real justice for the people, so that’s what we’re going for.”

“Blue?”

“Oh, fuck, it’s just her nickname from when we were kids.”

“So, you’re just working with her, Javi? This woman from your hometown, you’ve known for years you’re telling me? Who you call by her childhood nickname?  Who is your friend’s sister? And you’re just … working together on this?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You forget I know you Javi and I’m hearing how you’re talking about her.”

“Fuck off.”

“Too close to home? Tread carefully, Javi, please.”

He doesn’t know the half of it, Javi thinks, immediately thinking of the moment he almost kissed you.  He takes a deep drag of his cigarette and doesn’t answer letting silence be his answer.

“How’s it down there now anyway?“ Steve asks after a moment. His voice manages to convey both a desire to be distanced from Bogotá and a sense of wistfulness at once. Javi gets it.

“It’s the same but different, Steve. The godfathers aren’t like Escobar. It’s a whole different type of battle down there right now.” Javi can’t tell Steve about the surrender deal he’s blown up, about the way everything is working out, or rather how it isn’t, about how fragile and terrifying the odds feel right now.

“So, what are you going to do when it’s done?”

“No fucking idea. You’re the one who said I was a lifer.”

Steve pauses and takes a sip of his own drink.  “Yeah, I did say that didn’t I?”

Javi shrugs, raises his beer to his friend in a mock salute.

He’s not sure how to truly answer Steve. He’s not sure what’s next for him; he can’t see himself in Laredo but the job is weighing on him, the job is changing. In all honesty, he has no clue what will come next. Home? His dad’s ranch? The life he originally wanted to escape? It’d be kind of poetic, he supposes. He’s not sure what else there is for him except DEA station after station for the rest of his life, watching his agents take part in missions while he sits in a suit and argues with other people about it.

“Anyway, tell me what’s new with you,” Javi asks instead.

The paperwork and handoff with your Justice colleagues takes hours. A part of you almost enjoyed the discussions with Starkman, the back and forth and chess moves to try and get what you needed.

You’re still not there though and that’s frustrating, draining even. You’re used to getting through a problem, but this one worries you.

Still, Jurado is in custody, the team have a solid case against him and that prosecution will proceed. Javi just needs him to talk and maybe he can get Christina back at the table too.

You’ve done as much as possible right now.

 All you can think about right now is how desperately you’re looking forward to getting to your hotel room and changing out of these sticky, creased clothes, having a shower and then sleeping until you need to get up for Tomorrow’s flight to Bogotá. You’re past the point of wanting food, of wanting anything other than this day to be over and for you to crawl into bed.

You’re finally on your way out of the building when you bump into him.

He looks just like he did all those months ago, back when you were last in DC. An expensive suit, intricately coiffured honeyed hair, wafting overpriced cologne that follows him with every step.

“What are you doing here?” you ask, a mix of surprise and horror in your voice when you watch his eyes take you in.  Your palms are becoming sweaty already and you’re desperate to get out of this building, to get as far away from here as quickly as possible.

This can’t be happening. He can’t be here.

“Oh, just a Justice case I’ve been working on. I can’t really -“ he says after a pause.

“Right, of course.” You’re wondering if you can get away with stamping your heel through his overpriced Italian shoes before you run out of the building.

“Why are you here? The last I heard you were working in Mexico?”

You feel a pang of annoyance; frustration that he knows enough about you to know you were working abroad, that he assumed it would be in Mexico. You’re outraged that his tone is as relaxed as it is, almost lazy. How dare he? How fucking dare he?

“Colombia,” you correct. “That’s why I’m here - it’s for the case we’re working on.”

“Damn, that’s intense.”

“It’s fine,” you say, your voice unfamiliar and sharp. It’s the same tone you used to employ in the courtroom against particularly difficult attorneys. It’s your ice queen voice, the one that other lawyers used to dread, that earned you your steely reputation for excellence.

The memories flood you; good, bad, somewhere in between. It’s like an avalanche, as though everything you’ve been avoiding has just hit you all at once and your chest is tight and you’re not entirely sure if you’re even breathing correctly right now.

You left DC to avoid having to go through this. You fucking moved country to avoid this.

How can he be here? What forces have you upset to bring such an awful, obscure coincidence into your day? And if he’s here, what if …

Their names freeze on your tongue. You swallow, even though your mouth feels bone dry. You can do this, you think. You can.

“You took the job I was going for, after everything,” you say, folding your arms around yourself. The hate, rage, and devastation tastes sour like bile in your mouth. “Even after what happened?”

You remember everything.

“It was a promotion. Did you honestly expect me to say no? You wanted that job too, remember? You can’t honestly tell me you have said no if our positions were reversed.”

“Of course I would have.”

“No, you wouldn’t. You’re kidding yourself if you think that. I know you; I remember what you were like in court. You’re ambitious.”

It’s not a point worth arguing. You know the truth and you know you’ll never know what could have been. You’re sure you wouldn’t have though, you’re sure your moral code would have prevailed.

 In another world though, maybe the positions are reversed and you’re standing in Simon’s shoes. If that had happened then you’d never have bumped into Javi again, you’d be in DC going about your old life with your old friends. It’s unimaginable.

You feel like that version of yourself is dead.

“So, what? Now you work with them?” you probe, because now the wound is open you can’t stop the outpouring, “What, do you all sit in the office together? Have a good laugh and joke about it - about me? Do you join in?”

He whispers your name, gaze fixated on the floor. All you can think is that this man used to be your friend and now he can hardly meet your eyes. You can barely even think of him without your blood pressure rising.

“Nothing actually happened,” Simon says after a moment, “he didn’t actually do anything to you, didn’t even touch you. That’s what you said to me, remember? Look, everything got out of hand, it didn’t need to go down like that.”

There’s an uncomfortable silence as you take in his admonishment. It’s on you then, you’re the one who rocked the boat, who blew the whistle. No, that’s not right.

“Fuck you. I never want to speak to you again, Simon.”

You spin on your heels, eager to get away, get out of here. Your heart is racing, your body feels numb and the voices of the ghosts that haunt you whisper in your ear the whole way to the hotel. 

“Hey Shelley, it’s Jamie …I don’t think she’s doing so well. I think you should try and get a flight out … I know … I know … Shelley? I don’t know if she’s coming back from this. I think we’re losing her.”

You sink your head deeper into the bath water as though the water has the answers. Maybe Jamie’s right.

You’re not sure who you are anymore, who you can trust.

Maybe they’re right. Maybe it’s all you. Maybe you’ve misinterpreted and twisted it all. You’ve been through it a thousand times and each time the details get hazier, less clear. You doubt yourself more by the day. Some days you’re not even sure what’s real anymore.

You have so much more empathy for any witness you’ve ever put on the stand now.

Maybe Jamie’s right too. You’re not sure how you come back from this? How do you ever go back to the office and just pretend it hasn’t happened?

You’ve prided yourself on being a strong lawyer, on being one of the best in your office. You never give up. Not usually.

This is different though.

You’re so tired. So drained. You feel like there’s nothing inside you anymore, like the process of the last few months has shucked the life out of you leaving only a shell behind.

Your promotion is over. You’ll have to continue to sit opposite them day in and day out and just - pretend? Every day, hour after hour, you’ll just sit there and know they’ll be talking about you the second you leave the room. You’ll be given all of the lousy cases, never progress further. You’ll be the cautionary tale to any other woman in the office who would dare speak up. You’ll be judged, you’re already being judged.

It’s only been two weeks and you can’t do it a day longer.

You’re done.

Your ex-boyfriend is sleeping on your sofa because he’s the only person you have left in this city. Because every other friend you have in this city you have either just realised is not your friend, or you have quietly just shut out until they stopped calling.

Except for Jamie, and that’s only because of Shelley and Carlos. Only because they called him out of worry, out of fear. Only because Shelley wouldn’t let you cut her off and leave you to your loneliness.

In her last call, she had gently suggested changing jobs, seeking a change of scenery - was that how she phrased it? It wasn’t running away, she said, it would be prioritising yourself.  She mentioned that Laredo needed a new ADA.  It felt too close though. You can’t go home broken like this, you’re not ready.

You heard from an old law school friend there was good legal work available in some of the embassies a while ago, that he’d got to travel to amazing countries for his job before he’d settled down in California last summer. Maybe something like that would be far enough away. He’d offered to recommend you for a post if you were looking for something new. You were going for the promotion then though so you put him off. But now?

You rise up from the bathtub, rest your arms either side of the bath and think for a moment.

Maybe Shelley’s right. It’s time for a change.

He sees you in the lobby just as he’s leaving the bar with Steve. Javi feels a little lighter; catching up with Steve has helped. For an hour or so, he’s been able to forget about Christina, to forget about Jurado, to remember when the job was more active, when he had a partner with him on this and he didn’t have to wear a suit and sit in stressful meetings.

Before Steve turned up in Colombia, Javi had felt like he was treading through molasses, every step infinitely harder than it should be. No one cared enough, he was fighting and it felt futile.

Javi scoffs at the memory. Yeah, why is that familiar again?

He waves you over with a casual smile as your paths are about to cross.

“Hey, Blue, this is -” Javi begins.

“I’m so sorry, I have to go,” you say, brushing past him.

Javi looks at your retreating form in surprise. “That was weird.” He’d thought you want to meet Steve, after all you’d encouraged him to meet Steve in the first place.

“She’s upset,” Steve says quietly.

“What? No, she isn’t, Steve.” You’re clearly not upset; Javi knows you, knows how tough you are. No, Steve has to be wrong.

“Well, she looked upset,” Steve persists.

“How do you - you don’t even know her, Steve.”

“I have a wife, Javi, and she looks like Connie when she’s upset. ”

He thinks back to your face as you walked back - everything in your body seemed tightly coiled like a spring and were those tears in your eyes? Your voice was so distant too. Maybe things had been more stressful with the Justice guys than he thought.

He’s not sure where you are in the hotel though; whether he should even try and talk to you right now.

Steve’s right though, something’s wrong and Javi needs to know why.

You make your way to the plane quietly, noticing Javi standing by the gangway, coffees balanced precariously in your hands. He’s wearing his DEA jacket and yellow aviators that he’s clearly had for a while.

He nods in acknowledgement when he sees you.

You wordlessly hand him a coffee before you both walk onto the plane.

The coffee served at breakfast was terrible; maybe the worst hotel coffee you’ve ever had. You’d taken full advantage of a five-minute window to get coffee at the airport; it was a need not a want. You’d bought one for Javi without a thought.

He smiles when he takes the coffee and your fingers brush very slightly in the handover.

“You saw the breakfast coffee then?” He asks lightly, giving you the out. In this moment you think he might be the best person you know.

“That wasn’t coffee. No idea what it was, but it wasn’t coffee.”

The two of you sit opposite each other, your coffees on the table in front of you.

“How was Steve?” you ask politely as the plane begins to move down the runway, “I’m sorry I had to uh, go straight to the room. Think I ate something off.” You hate that such an embarrassing lie is your excuse, that you prefer the idea of Javi thinking that than knowing you were upset, than running the risk of him asking why.

“Are you okay now?” Javi asks before sitting opposite you on the plane.

“I’m fine.”

“Steve thought - I thought … ”

“I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?”

No, you think, no I have hardly slept and I feel ridiculous that last night took me back like it did.

“I’m fine,” you repeat.

Javi nods at you but his furrowed brow tells you that he doesn’t believe you.

“Still no word from Christina?” you ask, automatically squeezing your knee as you feel the plane ascend higher in the air.

“No,” Javi says, pinching his brow. “Are we fucked without her?”

“We need to find her to secure Jurado’s testimony, yes. But if you have something else, another angle for this case then … maybe we’ll be okay.”

“What is really going on with you?”

Perhaps it’s because he’s persistent, perhaps it’s because he is meticulously trained in extracting truths from people, or perhaps it’s because he’s from home and he feels safe right now. You feel the words rise up though.

“I saw someone I used to work with.”

“And that upset you?”

“Yes.”

“Did they say something to you? Was that why were you upset?”

“No, he didn’t.”

“So did the bastard break your heart back in DC or something?” Javi jokes and then pauses when he sees your face.

You could let him have this misunderstanding. Pin it all on his assumption. You can see the cogs turning, the maths in his head, your near kiss makes sense to him now and your subsequent rejection.

You should let him believe this.

“Javi,” you say softly, “you have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“So tell me,” he says bluntly, looking at you with plaintive eyes. “Help me understand.”

“He was a friend and now he’s not. It’s simple. No big drama,” you say, looking out of the window at the cerulean sky all around you.

“Well, something clearly happened.” Javi shifts forward towards you, his elbows on the plastic table between you, hands closer to yours. “Blue, did something happen yesterday? Do we need to -” You can hear a hint of alarm in his voice and quickly realise what he’s assuming.

“No, no. He didn’t - please, it’s nothing. It’s honestly not - I’m just - it’s nothing, Javi.”

“It’s nothing? Doesn’t sound like nothing.”

“It’s a long story.”

“Well, we’ve got time.” He shifts, moves his hands across the desk that divides you; the distance between your bodies feeling more like a chasm with each breath.

“It’s stupid, don’t worry about it, Javi. Nothing happened,” you say, aware you’re just repeating Simon’s own words and excuses to you. 

“Blue?”

There are wars in your head. Arguments screaming and competing to be the loudest. You want to tell him. You can’t tell him.

You have this overwhelming desire to bare your soul right now though, you would like him to know and to understand.

It’s pathetic though, you think, so trifling to someone like him. He’s worked for the DEA for around a decade; Javi’s heard and probably seen far, far worse things happen to people. Simon’s words repeat over and over in your mind.

“Nothing actually happened … he didn’t do anything to you.”

If nothing happened though, why did it affect you so much? You’ve prosecuted far more evil men in your career: murderers, rapists. You know how the world works. That office, those men, even without touching you they broke you down. Sometimes you hate yourself for that, that you let that happen.

“It’s okay,” Javi says suddenly, breaking you out of your thoughts. “I’m sorry I asked. You don’t have to -”

“I was applying for a promotion, for the same job Simon has now. I would have been running the department I worked for and I was ready for it. I was so ready for it, Javi. I - there were always comments and I’m used to that. I’ve been the only woman in my office many times before. I know what to expect, how to ignore it and block it out. I know people say about me behind my back.”

“Blue -”

“There was this guy though, not the guy from yesterday, not Simon. It was someone else.”

You pause, unwilling to say his name and wring your hands. Just thinking about taking about this has made your throat feel dry, your palms sweaty and there’s a slow building sense of dread.

You steal a look at Javi who’s calm and solid and you realise that right now you do want to explain it to him. You do want to tell him.

You’d like him to understand.

 It’s just finding the right words. The ones that don’t make it sound worse than it was, because you always worry that if you do that somehow you’re taking something away from the people who’ve really been through it. But it’s about finding the words that don’t lessen it either. You’re balancing on a tightrope of trying to convey the right tone, the right intent. You want to be dispassionate when you tell him about something you can never be dispassionate about.

“He made me feel uncomfortable,” you say after a moment. 

Javi furrows his brow at this. You notice the way he fidgets with his hand on the table; a tic you’ve noticed throughout the past few months. He flutters his fingers before clenching them together, it’s a telling physical manifestation of his nerves you’ve picked up over the months.

“Don’t look like that, Javi, he didn’t do anything, not really.”

“So he did do something?” Javi asks, his eyes have become so intensely dark they’re almost obsidian and his gaze is completely focused on you. You notice how he scans you over, almost checking as though there’s some type of physical mark or scar he can find and appoint to this story.

“Hey, who’s the lawyer here?” you ask, desperate to break the moment, shaking your head. Javi raises his hands in mock defeat and you take a deep breath.

“He made comments, a lot of them and they were - nothing unusual at first, but then maybe they felt almost a little sinister and I - I started to feel really vulnerable in the office. I had to work with him on this important case, we were alone and - and I know it was only words but still. Anyway, I made a complaint.” You regard the dark varnish on your nails, notice the chip on your left index finger before you look at the floor. “That was a mistake. Big mistake.”

“Blue,” Javi says sadly.

“I know, it doesn’t sound all that relevant yet. It will. Anyway, it didn’t go well. They just - closed ranks. My promotion was cancelled. I uh - everyone in the department talked about what had happened openly in the office. Everything I’d spent years working towards for slipped away from me in a second.”

“And what happened to the guy?”

”He didn’t face any consequences and uh, that’s where Simon comes in, I guess. He got my promotion. And uh, to do that, he sided with the guy when he spoke to my old boss. They all did. Only Simon told me beforehand that he believed me. Didn’t stop him from going after a promotion though.”

“Fucking asshole.”

“That was the worst part of it all -  Simon was my friend, Javi. I thought he was my friend.”

Even now you can hear the heavy pain in your voice when you say that, the way his betrayal had just been too much and had cut you open deeper than any knife could have.

“Oh, Blue. It’s okay, you don’t have to -”

“So obviously, I couldn’t stay there after that. When this opportunity came up, I figured I should just do it. Seize the day, right?”

“Seize the day,” Javi repeats flatly.

“And I ended up here.”

You don’t feel relief at your confession; you feel embarrassed. Javi’s DEA - he’s probably heard of far, far worse things happening to other women. Here you are, a mess over seeing someone who let you down once. Here you are, the woman who clearly just couldn’t take a joke.

“Stop that,” he says gently, reaching for your hand and gently squeezing it.

“Stop what?”

“I can see those thoughts going through your head. Don’t.”

“I just -”

“What a fucking shitbag,” he mumbles, “I’m sorry that happened.”

“Wasn’t you,” you say quietly. “It was a while ago, I’m over it. It just bought some stuff up.”

“If you’d told me last night -”

“What, you would have found out where he was and confronted him?”

“Maybe,” he says with a crooked smile and shrug.

“Javi.”

“Blue,” he says, teasingly matching your tone.

“How was Steve?” you ask, desperate to divert attention from yourself. Javi looks at you for a long moment and then nods.

“He was okay,” he says, “It was good to catch up. Hadn’t seen him since I was last in Colombia.”

“Well, I’m glad you got to see him.”

A comfortable silence falls that is only broken when the pilot announces you’ll be landing shortly.

You strain to look out of the window, at the lush greenery and dramatic topography of Colombia.

“It’s a nicer plane than when I first came here.”

“Yeah?”

“I was stuck next to this guy who took up far more room than he should have, so I had to virtually hang over the aisle and then he had the audacity to spend the flight loudly snoring. He also had gas.”

Javi scowls in sympathy. ”Jeez.”

“I know.”

The plane lands smoothly and before you know it, you’re both standing up, ready to get back to the embassy and world.

This flight, this whole trip, has felt like a strange interlude from reality. One filled with ghosts and memories; welcome ones for Javi and unpleasant ones for you.

You’re ready to get back into that open plan office, to hearing meaningless gossip from Linda.

Javi takes your bag from the locker without a word, balancing it precariously with his own suitcase.

“Hey, Javi?” you ask as he hands your handbag when you finally descend the gangway.

“Yeah, Blue?”

“None of my family knows. I told my parents, told Rafa, it was a change I’d been planning for some time.”

“Understood. Thanks for - thanks for sharing that with me, cariño.” Javi nods at you, an unspoken message passing between you.

You’re nervous when you head into the office next day. While you spent most of your working day with Javi yesterday and nothing else was said about what you discussed on the plane, it’s plagued you.

What if he is different with you? What if this is another mistake and he judges you - or worse, what if he pities you? You don’t think you could stand to stay in this job if he looks at you with pity.

He’s standing in his office when you arrive. Arms folded onto his hips, staring at a pile of papers on his desk.

“Hey Javi.”

“Hi.” He looks at up and smiles. It’s a rare sight and you’re glad you’re a professional because his smile could floor you. You have a feeling Javi’s not really struggled for company over the years; that between his puppy eyes and soft smile, the low dulcet tones of his voice, he knows exactly what he is doing.

“So  uh, what’s the plan?” you ask, taking a long sip from the mug of coffee you dutifully took from your office kitchen to Javi’s. You’re very glad the embassy safety representative didn’t see you, no doubt they’d tell you off for wandering around with open topped hot beverages.

You needed the coffee though, needed the defensive barriers you knew it would provide.

You didn’t really sleep much last night.

Jurado is a mess, the deal’s off and no matter how hard you tried, he just won’t talk without his wife.

“We’re going after Miguel Rodríguez,” he says after a pause. “That’s the next step.”

“Have we got a plan?”

“Yeah, we do. Feistl’s got an informant, we can get him, Blue. It’s not over yet.”

“It’ll need some thought, Javi - you don’t want to tip him off. Right now, from what I hear from the local prosecutors, things are not looking great. Miguel’s a loose cannon. It’s a worry. ”

“So, let’s stop him,” Javi says simply. “We’re nearly there.”

“Okay,” you reply, “Okay, Javi. I’m with you.”

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[crazyk-imagine]

The Good, The Bad, and The Working on It

Pairing: (Stepdad) Jake “Hangman” Seresin x Mom!Reader

Characters: (Stepdad) Jake “Hangman” Seresin, Mom!Reader, Edwin and Maryanne (the kiddos), Penny Benjamin, Amelia Benjamin, Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw, Pete "Maverick" Mitchell, Natasha "Phoenix" Trace, Robert "Bob" Floyd, Reuben "Payback" Fitch, Mickey "Fanboy" Garcia, Javy "Coyote" Machado, Billy "Fritz" Avalone, Callie "Halo" Bassett, Neil "Omaha" Vikander, Bringham "Harvard" Lennox, Logan "Yale" Lee, Marty and Cody (the other bartenders)

Warnings: Fluff, minor angst, not enough communication (always communicate with your partner), minor cursing (very brief), drama, nicknames (gorgeous, darlin’, etc.), Fanboy is the man when it comes to photography, Bob is the best guy for the job of being a DJ,  Javy "Coyote" Machado is a good friend, Jake being a softie, Penny acts as a protective mother figure over reader, Bradley judges our favorite cocky pilot, everyone teases Jake, Cute quick Penny and Pete moment.

Word Count: 11,575

A/N: This can easily become a series, still thinking about it though (even though I have notes and drafts all revolving around this imagine and I made a header for it not even 10 min ago)

Answers to TGTBATWOI

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Three and a half years ago…

After the father of your kids decided that he had enough of being tied down and left with little to no goodbye, it was safe to say you didn’t think or care about dating after that shitty experience. 

So, you can fully admit (as well as Jake and his pilot buddies) that it was no surprise when you met said pilot at the Hard Deck. 

You work there a little more than part time, being a bartender there is your “out of the house” job (as you like to say) and you do a type of telemarketing at home when the company you’ve been emailing with asks you too. 

Luckily it doesn’t happen all the time but sometimes it can be pretty inconvenient on days when your babies have a part in a play and they’re the lead star or when they have their first soccer game (it was a bit of a hassle to accomplish but you did it). 

And then again, it was no surprise when Jake was a jackass when you two first met. 

You (and anyone else, yes, including Bradley and Pete) can admit that it was nice when he actually started to act like a human being with emotions and not some douche with a huge ego. 

Today however, will be the test to see how everything will be if you and Jake decide to take your relationship (or pining) a step further… even though he hasn’t officially asked you out.

-

“Are you sure you can’t watch them for another three-ish hours?” You ask your babysitter and get a lame excuse saying she can’t because she has to study when she actually has plans to go out with her friends and her boyfriend (the kids told you yesterday about all this). 

You sigh, hanging up your phone before shoving it into your pocket. You rest your hands on the edge of the bar top, closing your eyes with your head down to the floor. 

“You, okay?” Penny asks. 

You quickly straighten your posture, “yep, all good.” 

“Your babysitter cancel on you?” 

You avert your gaze, “maybe.” 

“You get off early tonight, why not bring them here? Pete and the others will be here. They could go swimming.” 

“I don’t have any of their swim things and no sunscreen. Plus, I need them to focus on their homework right now. I don’t want to have another meeting with their teachers over something as minor as homework.” 

She nods, “alright. We can have them sit over at one of the tables until the lunch rush shows. And, before you say anything, breath. We’ll be fine. I’ve got Marty and Cody coming in for their shifts in an hour which will give you more than enough time to go pick them up and come back here… even though we won’t need you.” 

“I’m gonna ignore that last part because we both know it’s not true. Thank you.” 

You check the clock on the wall, “crap. I gotta go. I’ll be back soon.”

-

“Looks like your girlfriends not here,” Javy comments. 

“She’s not- shut up, man.” Jake shoves his buddy away from him as he enters the bar, immediately aiming for the center station. He can’t take these conversations seriously without a drink. 

“Where’s the only sensible woman Bagman hasn’t managed to sink his claws into?” Natasha asks, standing behind him. 

“He’s in one of his moods,” Javy says before leaning down to “whisper”, “she’s not here. Her car wasn’t in the parking lot.” 

“Guess she came to her senses,” she pats him on the shoulder. 

Logan, Billy, and Callie wave her over, pointing to the pool table. 

She walks away from the two, wanting to place some bets (knowing she’ll make a quick buck or two). 

-

“She’s gonna be here soon, you know. Don’t pout, man.” Javy pats Jake’s shoulder, not wanting to have to console the dude for something so minor but willing to do so anyway. 

“Would you stop saying that? I don’t care, alright?” 

His friend makes an attempt to respond but doesn’t because he starts coughing, choking on his saliva. 

“You good?” 

His buddy shakes his head, covering his mouth with a clenched fist, using his free hand to point over at you. 

The blonde turns, his eyes widen ever so slightly. “She has kids?” He mutters to himself, wondering who else may have known and if this is why you continue to turn him down. 

He thinks back to the times when he’s asked you out and if you wear a wedding ring or have mentioned having a boyfriend, but the answer is no.

-

“Alright, today we can focus on your homework a little more because Pen has a couple extra hands. We ready?” 

“Do we have to?” Edwin, Ed (or Eddie) asks with a whining tone. 

“Don’t give me that pouty lip, Mister. If we can get this done before we go home, I know for a fact you would feel better.” 

“What if I don’t want to feel better?” 

“You should.” 

You turn to your daughter, Maryanne, who’s older by three years looks back down at her own work. “Thank you, sweetheart, but I don’t need you to chime in with your insightful thoughts.” 

“But he needs to focus. He’s already gotten a warning from his teacher.” 

“He’s what?” You turn to look at your son, “Edwin, is this true?” 

He looks down, not saying anything. 

“Why did you get a warning?” 

“She wouldn’t let me ask my friend for help.” 

“Were you talking to your friend during class time when you know you’re not supposed to?” 

He purses his lips, “that’s ervelant.” 

“Irrelevant, sweetheart. How long ago did you get your warning?” 

“He got it on his first day and we’re on our third day of school now.” 

You turn to your daughter, “do you know if it was a verbal warning or is there something I need to sign?” 

She shakes your head, “the first one. It’s okay though. His teacher tells me what I need to tell you when I’m waiting for him in his class after school.” 

Your son is upset that you two are talking about and “acting” like he’s not even there. “Don’t talk about me like I’m not here!” 

“Eddie, I need you to calm down-” 

“No!” 

You open your mouth to say his name again when he hops off the chair and runs off. Your eyes widen. “Sweetheart, you’re coming with me. Hold my hand.” 

“Mom,” she groans. 

“There is a small crowd already. I will not lose both of my children in it.” 

She lets out a dramatic, long sigh, “fine.” 

You grab her hand, “thank you.”

-

Javy opens the bathroom door, stopping when something bounces off his legs. He freezes when he sees a little boy sitting on his butt, looking up at him, ready to cry. “Oh no.” 

“Hey, what’re you doing? Get out of the doorway, man,” Jake says. 

“There’s a tearful kid in the way.” 

“What?” He looks over his buddy’s shoulder to find Edwin sitting there with a wobbly lip. 

“What do I do?” 

“Pick the kid- move out of my way.” Jake scoffs, “Coyote.” The blond bends down, holding his hand out for the little boy to take. 

Edwin hesitantly reaches up for the man’s hand. 

Jake helps him off the ground, giving him a gentle smile. “Atta boy, you’re looking better already. Is your mom or dad here?” 

He nods. 

“You want to point me in their direction-”

“Eddie! Edw-” Maryanne stops you, pointing to Jake. 

You rush over to the two, kneeling beside Jake. “Edwin, I’ve told you too many times, not to run off like that.” 

He sniffs, nodding his head. 

You sigh, wiping his cheeks before turning to find- “Jake.” 

“My favorite,” he glances between the two, “b-a-r-t-e-n-d-e-r.” 

“I can spell,” Maryanne says with slight attitude. 

“Maryanne.” 

“Sorry mama.” 

“These two are yours?” 

“Obviously.” 

“I’m really sorry,” Javy starts to apologize. “I didn’t see him and then he-” 

You smile, “Javy, it’s okay. I know you didn’t do anything on purpose. He just got upset and ran off.” 

“I’m still really sorry.” 

“We accept your apology.” You stand up, “why don’t you two go join the rest of your crew. We’ve got some work to do.” 

Your daughter pouts, leaning against you. 

He stands up. “You go,” Jake whispers to Javy. 

“Dude.” 

“Just go.” 

“Alright, alright.”

-

“So, what kind of homework do we have to do?” 

You shake your head, holding both of your kids’ hands, “no, Jake. You go join your friends. You don’t want to stay and help out with homework, that’s not what you came here to do.” 

“I came here to talk to some people, and I’d certainly enjoy talking to you three.” 

You scoff through your nose, shaking your head to hide the fact that your cheeks are on fire. 

“Let me carry little man and don’t tell me I don’t need to. I want to, gorgeous.” He lifts Edwin into his arms, holding the boy against his hip. 

Maryanne starts walking ahead, pulling you with her. 

You all settle into your seats, Jake across from you with the kids on each side of you. 

“I finished my writing assignment before we went looking for Ed.” 

You give her a small smile, “that’s good, what else do you have to do?” 

She pouts, “math.” 

You nod, “okay.” 

“I can help,” Jake offers. 

“You can?” You ask. 

“I’m gonna pretend I didn’t hear that attitude and say yes.” 

“Since when were you a math whiz?” 

“Since I actually put in the effort to pass.” 

“That’s always nice to hear...” You smirk, resting your head on your palm, “were you being threatened with detention?” 

“Worse.” 

“No car?” 

“Bingo.” 

“I bet it would have been hilarious to see teen, skinny armed, pasty Jake riding his bike through the neighborhood.” 

“Oh, yeah. So, funny.” He turns to Maryanne, glancing down at her work, “you need help with math?” 

“Yeah… can you help me?” 

“Sure, I can. What are we doing today?”

-

“Is he actually being nice to kids?” Bradley mutters. 

“He’s obviously doing it to impress her,” Reuben adds. 

“I don’t think so. He’s actually good with kids. You should see him with his nieces and nephews,” says Javy. 

“There’s more of him? There are little bagman’s running around out in the world?” Natasha asks, catching the last little bit of the conversation. 

Javy dry laughs, “ha ha. Yeah, kind of. He just doesn’t want you all to see him as a softie.” 

“I feel like I’m watching a rom com,” Mickey says. 

“But it’s actually decent and well worth watching,” adds Bob. 

“How long have you been there?” Reuben asks. 

“A few minutes. I’m waiting on my soda.” 

“Anyone want to play pool?” Javy asks. 

“Or darts? Maybe next to them?” Natasha offers. 

Javy smirks, “let’s go.” He wraps his arm around her shoulders, pulling her with him. 

Mickey and Bob trail behind them, shaking their heads, not liking what the two may be planning. 

Reuben runs over to the bar to grab their drinks.

-

“And how are we today?” Javy asks, wrapping his arm around is buddy’s shoulders. He turns to Edwin, “sorry about running into you little dude.” 

“It’s okay and we’re good. Jake’s helping Maryanne with her math,” you tell him. 

“You’ve got the best guy to help her.” 

“How come we never met your mini me’s?” Mickey asks, pulling Javy away so he and Natasha can start their game of darts. 

“My babysitter canceled.” 

“That sucks. Why? If you don’t mind me asking.” 

“She’s in high school, has a boyfriend. Need I say more.” 

“Ah,” he nods, “got it. Well, if you ever need a babysitter, I’d happily offer my services.” 

“Well, aren’t you sweet.” 

Jake furrows his brows; he knows the kid isn’t hitting on you, but he can’t help but feel a little jealous very jealous. “Alright, that’s enough. Your partner in crime is calling you over to play darts.” 

Mickey snickers as he walks away. 

-

“You good, Seresin?” You ask with a raised brow. 

“Always,” he smirks before helping Maryanne with her homework. 

You smile, letting yourself daydream about a future with him and how nice it would be to be able to share a life with him, having family outings, potentially expanding your family, and growing old together… You shake your head, ridding your mind of these thoughts. You don’t want to get your hopes up (anymore, then you already have). 

He glances over at you and smiles. 

You fight the urge to smile for a second before you give up and give in, smiling with just as much, if not a skosh more happiness. 

After about an hour or so, Maryanne was able to successfully finish her homework. 

“You know if she gets a good grade on her homework, I’m gonna ask you to help her again. I can barely help her when she asks me. If it was me, I would have still been on problem two.” 

Jake chuckles, “I’d be happy to help her out as long as I get to take you out.” 

A nervous chuckle escapes you, “you mean like a- like a date?” 

“If you wouldn’t be opposed to it.” 

You bite the inside of your cheek, “I’ll see if I can find the time.” 

He shakes his head. 

You check your phone, seeing that it’s dinner time and you’ve been off your shift since- wow three hours ago. “Looks like it’s time to go home. I’ve still got to make dinner and figure out when I need to go grocery shopping. Do I need gas?” You push your chair in, helping the kids get ready. 

Jake getting out of his seat makes you realize you, kind of, forgot about him for a second. “Oh, sorry, I got too into my head.” 

“It’s alright, my sister is the same way.” 

“Oh, how is everyone? I’ve been meaning to ask but every time I want to someone else needs a drink.” 

“It’s okay. Maybe on our date we can talk more about things you’ve been wanting to ask me and… I can do the same.” 

“Yeah?” 

He nods, giving you a genuine smile, enjoying how he gets to see you all excited and jittery (and hopefully because of him, in a good way, of course), “yeah.” 

“Can we go now?” Edwin asks, rubbing his eyes. 

“Come on, let’s go.” 

“I’ll walk you all out.” 

-

“I’ll call you.” 

“You don’t have my number,” you point out. 

“Did you forget, I’m good with numbers.” 

You’re not impressed right now. “Just give me your phone.” 

“So bossy,” he teases, pulling his phone out of his pocket. 

“You love it, don’t lie.” 

“Maybe I do but, I think that’s more of a later date thing.” 

You return his phone back to him, “you think we’ll be going on more than one date?” 

He nods. “I know we will.”

You shake your head, “goodnight, Jake.” 

He leans in, giving you time to push him away; you don’t. He pecks your cheek. 

You close your eyes, inhaling his cologne (something else you’ve grown to like about him). 

He pulls back, opening the car door for you. 

You shake your head, remembering what you have to do. 

“Text me when you get home,” he says, leaning against the car and door. 

“Only if you do them same.” 

“’Course I will. Goodnight, gorgeous.” 

“Night, Jake.”  

-

After that night, he officially asked you out for a proper date and the two of you hit it off. 

He didn’t take you to a fancy restaurant (since he asked the others and Penny for a few different ideas on where you’d like to go). Jake did NOT want to screw up (what felt like) his one chance to take you out. 

The two of you found yourselves in his truck, laying in the back watching the stars, talking about whatever came to mind while you ate fast food. 

“This has to be the best date I’ve been on in- well, ever honestly,” you admit, staring up at the night sky. 

He turns his head, studying your side profile, “really?” 

“Without a shadow of a doubt.” 

He gulps, unsure if he should ask this now or ever. “I know this is too soon to ask and I might be overstepping some boundaries but, what happened with Maryanne and Edwin’s dad? Is he going to come back into their lives at any point in the future?” 

You scoff, leaning up to rest on your elbow with your head angled down towards him. “I can assure you that he will never come back into their lives until they turn eighteen then they can make the decision, but I will take the role of a bad guy if it means I keep that asshole away from them and out of their lives.” 

You sigh, resting on your back once more, “he decided that when Edwin was three months old, and Maryanne was close two and a half that he wasn’t cut out for the life of being a dad or being tied down, so he left, and I haven’t looked back since. He hasn’t called or texted since then so why should I go looking for him. He made his choice.” 

“And you made yours.” 

“What’s that?” 

Jake shuffles closer to you, cupping your cheek with his thumb brushing across your cheekbone every so often as he stares into your eyes. “You are raising two amazing kids all by yourself and you look damn good doing it.” 

You let out a quiet playful laugh. 

“I’m not gonna lie, a part of me wishes that they were mine.” 

“Yeah? What about the other part of you?” 

“Which one? I’ve got two more.” 

You raise your hand, placing it against the base of his neck, brushing your thumb back and forth against the edge of his hair, “what’s the second part of you say?” 

“How much I want to ask you to marry me even though it might be too soon.” 

“And the other?” 

“If it’d be stupid of me to ask if you’d be my gorgeous girl and let me in, help you raise those two troublemakers.” 

You sink your teeth into your bottom lip, preventing yourself from getting too emotional. “Seems to me like you just want to get in my house to see my bedroom.” 

“That would certainly be a plus, wouldn’t it?” 

“For you maybe.” 

“Damn straight.” He leans down, whispering in your ear, “I’d get to see what you wear underneath your pretty little clothes without asking you to strip for me.” 

You scoff, slapping your hands against his chest. 

He chuckles, pulling back to see you relaxed and happy, something he doesn’t think he’s ever seen before. “There’s another part of me that wants to do something.” 

“Like what?” 

“Kiss you.” 

You don’t realize it until a second later, but your lips tugged upwards, and you know you’re smiling. “Do it,” you whisper. 

He hums, blinking owlishly at you clearly coming out of his thoughts. 

You lean up and lightly brush your lips against his before pulling back. You switch from staring one eye to the next, waiting to see panic or disgust, only to find the stars twinkling in his eyes. “Kiss me.” 

“Are you sure? Because I don’t think I’ll be able to stop once I start.” 

You both lean into one another sharing a passionate first kiss (with many more to come).

-

Two years later...

“Do you think she’s gonna say yes?” asks Jake, to his friend who has a bored look on his face. 

“I hope so. I’m tired of hearing you complain and whine about “if she says no” and how you’ll “die” with whatever answer she does give you,” Javy slaps his hands on the blond man’s shoulders, “shut up. She’s gonna say yes.” 

Jake says nothing as he purses his lips, “I hear you but what if-” 

“Shut up,” Javy hands him a handful of darts, “and play. Have a drink, just do something- anything to calm your nerves… please. And you hear that? I’m asking you nicely.” 

He stares at Javy with a deadpan expression. “I’m talking to you in confidence. You’re supposed to boost me up and help me feel better.” 

“I am.” 

“You’re not being honest with me,” Jake complains. 

“I am.” He sees the look his fellow pilot is giving him out of the corner of his eye while he throws the dart at the dartboard, it lands, and he turns around. “Look, you’re an asshole-” 

“Thank you, keep telling me things I need to hear,” the blond says with sass. 

“But you’re an asshole in love and you’re,” Javy pokes his chest, “just too scared to admit it.” 

“Yeah,” he nods, until he repeats what his friend said in his head and glares at Javy. “I hate you sometimes,” he throws a dart at the dart board, it lands way off base from the center. 

“Yeah, yeah.” 

Bob walks over to the two, glancing over Jake with a concerned expression. “Is he okay?” 

“Him? Oh, yeah. He’s fine.” 

“He’s nervous she’s gonna say no, huh?” 

Jake spins around, using a dart to point at Bob. “No, I’m not.” 

Javy leans closer to the WSO, “he’s in the denial stage.” 

“I can see that.” 

“You two are messing up my concentration. Go gossip about me somewhere else.” 

“You know,” Javy pats his shoulder, “it’s okay to be scared.” 

“I’m not scared,” he denies. 

“Lying is only gonna make this worse.” 

“Can it, Baby on Board.” 

Bob raises his hands, staring at the ground with a slight smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. 

“Your girl’s here,” Billy says, handing Javy a drink and Bob his beer nuts. 

Jake spins around just as the dart hits the center of the dart board. A boyish grin tugs at the corner of his mouth, “yes, she is.” He hands Bob the third dart, “have fun boys. Oh, and use protection, especially you,” he points to the WSO before talking off. 

“What?” 

“Ignore him. He’s in love, you know, it makes people do and say crazy things,” Javy assures Bob.

-

“Hey, gorgeous,” he greets you, placing a hand on your lower back. 

“Hey.” You turn around, leaning into him. You see the guys standing there, watching the two of you. “Are we gonna go say hi?” 

He shakes his head, “nope. Come on.” He leads you towards the walls, wanting to get away from the crowd, not lose you in it. 

“Where are we going?” 

“I want to go outside and see how much more beautiful you can look tonight.” 

You scoff, smacking his shoulder, “you can be such an adorable suck up.” 

“Only for you,” he pecks your lips, “did it work?” 

You roll your eyes, “shut up.” You grab his hand, pulling him along behind you. You happily wave over at the three, who return “cool” waves, except for Bob (he always waves back with just as much enthusiasm as you do to him). 

Jake shoves you out the door, letting it slam shut behind him. 

-

He pulls you back, spinning you around once, and wraps his arms around your waist. “Hi.” 

You can’t resist his charm and smile back at him, “hi.” 

“Let’s walk along the beach, yeah?” 

You nod, “if that’s what you want to do.” 

“Come on,” he tucks you into his side and starts walking. 

You begin to wonder what he has planned. Jake usually doesn’t like to walk along the beach at night (he can’t see your gorgeous face as he likes to say whenever you ask… which is always). 

You turn to look at him, he’s nervous but you can’t tell why. You know there’s nothing important coming up such as birthdays, holidays, or anniversaries. The kids haven’t been giving him too much of a hard time (it’s a tough process but they do seem to act like they like him when he comes over or when you all go out). 

You’re left even more confused than when you first exited the bar. 

He stops, staring out into the ocean. 

You watch him, curious as to what’s floating around in his head, “are you okay?” 

He turns his head looking at you, wondering how he got so lucky to have meet you and hoping you’ll say yes because he wants the married life with you and to be another parent figure that Maryanne and Edwin can look up too. He knows he wants to live out the rest of his life with you and the kids. Jake gulps, “you should ring me?” 

You jerk your head back, blinking owlishly at him, “what?” 

“We should rings.” He closes his eyes with a clenched jaw, shaking his head. 

You tilt your head, “are you feeling okay?” You place your hand on the back of his forehead. 

He nods, reaching into his pocket, pulling the box out of his pocket, practically shoving it in his face. 

You grab his wrist pulling it down, out of your face and look down, realizing what he’s planning to do. “Jake?” 

“I don’t know how to say it.” 

“What- uh- what do you want to do?” 

“I think it’s pretty obvious what I want to do.” 

“Okay, smart ass. Get down on one knee and ask me.” 

“That’s the thing. I can’t figure out how to ask you.” He bends down on one knee, “I’ve got too much running through my head. and I don’t know what to say. Then before I know words just start spewing out of my mouth.” 

You take a deep breath, placing your hands on his shoulders, “what’s the first thing that pops into your head when you think about wanting to marry me?” 

“I don’t want to marry you. I am gonna marry you. So,” he reaches for your left hand, placing a gentle kiss on top, “you can’t get rid of me easily.” 

An emotional chuckle escapes you, “what a sap you are.” 

“The first thing that pops into my head when I think about us being married is how there isn’t going to much of a difference because we’re already a family. But there is one thing I do know and that’s wanting to grow old with you. You know, I want us to be the older fun couple who still act like they did their first year of dating and I want to listen to your old lady problems.” 

You smack his shoulder. 

He chuckles, “while you listen to my old man issues.” 

“Something tells me there’s gonna be a lot.” 

“Let me finish then we can add the commentary later… I also want to be able to help with the kids more.” 

“You already do so much.” 

“I know but, I think it’s best if we don’t have a lunch issue 2.0.” 

You nod, wiping your cheeks, “that’s very true. You almost got kicked out. They called me to make sure you were who you said you were.” 

“I told them not to.” 

“Oh, yeah because that always goes well when a strange man they hadn’t actually seen before says “don’t call their mom”. Really, Jake? I mean honestly.”

- 

“Ask her already!” Javy, Bob, Natasha, Bradley, Pete, and Penny shout. 

You two turn to see some of the gang standing there, waiting for Jake to pop the question. 

“If you don’t do it tonight, you’re doing all my paperwork,” Pete shouts. 

“I already do.” 

“Yeah, well… then you’ll have more.” 

-

“Can you guys turn towards me a little?” Mickey asks, holding up his phone. “You’re gonna regret it, if you don’t.” 

You two do as he asked. 

“Perfect, thank you! And… propose.” 

-

“What are we in a movie or something? Geez,” you roll your eyes. 

“I’m gonna ask you now.” 

“Okay, shutting up now.” 

“Will you marry me?” 

“Can I think about it?” 

“What?” He asks with his eyes nearly popping out of his head. 

“I’m joking, you idiot. Of course, I will!” You throw your arms around his neck causing the two of you to fall back. 

The two of you start laughing. 

You push yourself off him, opting to lay on your side. 

“Oh shit.” 

“What?” 

“Where’s the ring?” 

“Right here,” answers Bradley, holding the ring box up for him. 

“Give it to me.” 

“No.” 

“Give it to me, chicken.” 

“See that, that right there is exactly why I won’t.” 

“I swear to-” 

“Shut up,” Natasha snatches the box from him and hands it to Jake. “Don’t be an idiot.” 

“I wasn’t,” Bradley pouts. 

“Sure, you weren’t.” 

Jake lifts your hand up and slides the ring on, kissing your knuckles. 

You give him an excited smile, wondering how you got so lucky and he’s doing the same. 

Your scooped up before you know it, squealing until you find yourself taller than everyone else. “Guys,” you giggle, “put me down.” 

“Nope,” a certain mustached man responds. 

“Nat? Help?” 

“Mickey’s getting a good shot of you up there,” she says, looking over said pilot’s shoulder.  

“We can do a better photoshoot tomorrow. Put me down.” 

“Can I have my fiancée back?” 

“After the old timer,” Penny pats Pete’s shoulder, “buys a round for everybody.” 

You all holler, shouting excitedly. 

-

“Not the whole bar, right?” Pete asks his girl. 

She smirks, “no, only a lucky few. I promise… as long as your phone doesn’t wind up on the bar top.” 

“You’re a cruel, cruel woman.” 

“I’ve gotta be stern when running a bar.” 

“I was hoping that wouldn’t apply to me.”  

-

“Alright, one round on the old man then we’re outta here,” Jake announces. 

Numerous “aw’s” and “boo’s” come his way. 

“We gotta go home and get the kids ready for school.” 

“Who knew Bagman could be such a softie?” Natasha adds. 

“You couldn’t have done this on a Saturday?” 

“Shut up, chicken.” 

“I’m just saying, you should have planned better.” 

“And we’re out of here.” 

-

You let out a soft chuckle, squeezing his hand as you two exit the bar. “Jake, I wanted to say by to everyone.” 

“I did too, but they pissed me off.” 

“You’re such an old man.” 

He lightly pushes you against the car door, “hey, I’m your old man, gorgeous.” 

You smirk, “that makes me your old lady?” 

“Or if you prefer, my gorgeous.” He kisses your cheek. 

“That’s a bit of an open ending, don’t you think?” 

“No because you can add anything you want to it.” 

“You’re such a sappy suck up,” you tell him before reaching up to peck his cheek. 

“Only for you.”

-

“I don’t know how they’re gonna react.” You glance over at the front door of your shared home. 

"We don’t have to get married right away.” 

You look over at him, “Jake…” 

“No,” he shakes his head. “It’s not just because of Maryanne and Edwin, alright. I want us to take our time and plan it. Invite the people we actually want to be there because I can tell you no one from my family would actually come. I mean, my sister might but… I want to make this a special day for us.” 

“I don’t want to argue about this, even though all I have to say is that I know whenever or wherever we have this wedding it will be special.” 

“Now who’s a sappy suck up,” he reaches over the middle console to cup your cheek. 

“What are we gonna do if the kids don’t accept this?” 

“We’ll figure it out. We always do.” 

“I don’t want you to be the one who’s hurt.” 

He shakes his head, “I won’t be. If I can be a part of their life in any other way, I’ll do it. And I get their hesitancy towards me. I do.” 

“I know you do and that’s so, so nice of you but you don’t deserve to be treated like this.” He rests his forehead against yours, “like I told you, I would do anything to be in their lives.” He pecks the corner of your mouth, “and yours.” 

Jake pulls back, staring into your eyes. His thumb brushes back and forth against your cheekbone. “Let’s go inside, yeah?” He knows he can only distract you from your worries for so long. 

You nod, not wanting to worry about this anymore. “Okay.” 

-

A month and a half ago…

The credits play across the screen. The sound is off because he muted the TV, wanting to talk to you. 

"It happened again," Jake sighs. 

You quietly groan to yourself, rubbing your face with both hands before slapping your thighs. You scoot yourself into an upright position, legs still resting in his lap, "I'm sorry, honey. I can talk to them again or-" 

"No, it's okay. I- uh-” He gulps, “I was thinking maybe I should go stay somewhere else for a few days." 

You shake your head, "no. No, absolutely not." 

He doesn’t say anything for a few minutes. "Our kids don’t care about me." 

You scoff through your nose, "they do. How could you ever think otherwise?" Your chest puffs out with every breath you take, your vision blurs as tears pool in your water line. 

He cups your cheeks, "they're not going to warm up to me because they think I'm trying to replace their deadbeat dumbass of a father, or they think I’m gonna be exactly like him and leave. They’re not ready to trust me." 

"They know you’re not trying to replace him," you weakly argue. 

"You could be right, but they won't listen to you because you’re mom." 

You sniff, "please, don’t leave." 

"I'm doing this to save yours and the kids relationship." 

"You staying here and being a part of the kids’ lives hasn't changed that." 

"But it will." 

This is it. It feels like it’s the end of your relationship, but you know it’s not. You refuse to believe that you two won’t find your way back to one another and have a better improved relationship with yourself and the kids. His bag falls to the ground. 

-

You take a step forward and rest your head on his shoulder, silently crying into his shirt, bunching it in your clenched fists, "Jake…" 

He shushes you, wrapping his arms around you, pulling you closer. His hand finds its way up to its rightful resting place, cupping your cheek, "hey, look at me. Look at me please.” 

You lift your head up, with wet cheeks. 

His thumb sweeps across your cheek, wiping away your tears, “you know I love you, right?" 

You don’t think you’ve ever heard him sound so emotional (except for when he told you about his past and his family, the day he asked to marry you, when he repeated what you said about moving in, and the first time he said I love you). "Course I do.” You lean in closer, whispering, “I love you so much." 

It feels like you’re sharing a secret (which you are about Jake’s departure… from the kids for the time being). 

"I'll text you when I make it to my place." 

You nod, "okay." 

Jake leans down, kissing you, reminding you of how much he loves you. He takes a step back, one hand on your back as he leans over to grab his bag. 

You two stare at one another with tears in your eyes (yes, even Jake’s on the verge of crying- or maybe he already is but your own tear-filled eyes blur your vision, preventing you from seeing so). 

His hand slides off your back after he opens the door. He steps outside, feeling like a stranger on the porch of his own home. Jake tries to walk away before things could get even more depressing. 

You reach out, hand squeezing his bicep, silently pleading for him to stay. “Be careful?” 

The corner of his lips tug upward into a farewell cocky smirk, “always am, gorgeous. Always am.” 

You watch as he gets in his car and wave him off (breaking your hearts into a million pieces). 

Jake disappears from you view and you stand there for a few seconds, unwilling to move because if you do, you’ll be home alone… you’ll be alone. 

You close the door, resting your forehead on the wooden frame. Your shoulders shake as you struggle to keep your cries quiet. You raise your hand, covering your mouth; whimpers escape you before you can even try and stop them. 

As much as you don’t want to, you make your way to your bedroom. You swear you hear your heart break when you walk in. It doesn’t look like much has changed but you know if you open your dresser drawers and check the closet, his clothes won’t be there. You won’t be able to admire his uniform or shake your head at the way he organizes his sock and underwear drawer. 

You try to not to think about the little things you’ll miss while taking of your shoes. You lay down on your side, bending your legs, curling into yourself. 

After about an hour of laying down, you text Penny. 

SoonToBeMrs.S 

Hey Pen Sent Read 1:58pm 

PickaPenny 

Are you alright? You only say my name when something’s happened Sent Read 2:00pm 

SoonToBeMrs.S

All good here. Can you pick up Maryanne and Edwin? Sent Read 2:00pm 

PickaPenny

You got it. Sent Read 2:01pm 

PickaPenny typing… 

-

“What are you doing here?” 

Jake turns around, his shoulders sag, “needed a drink.” 

“Why am I getting a text from your fiancé about picking up the kids?” asks Penny. 

He gulps, “I- uh- I’m gonna be out of the house for a while.” 

“Oh, I didn’t hear you were deployed.” 

“I’m not.” 

The bar owner looks back at him after giving another customer her drink. “What did you do?” 

“I didn’t do anything.” 

“Did you break it off with her?” 

“No, God no. Penny I-” 

“You what?” 

“I’m doing this to save the family relationship.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“The kids don’t like me.” 

“I don’t think that’s true.” 

“They don’t listen to a thing I say and when I pick them up from school, they don’t talk to me.” 

“Have you tried talking to them?” 

“Of course, I have.” 

“No, no. Not ask them questions, talk to them about the whole situation?” 

“I’ve tried but they won’t put in the effort to listen. And, yeah, I know they’re kids and that’s how they are, but I want them to know that I’m not trying to replace their bio dad and I want them to stop thinking I’ll leave ‘em just like he did. I just- I can’t get through to them. And I’m not going to be the reason they hate their mom for marrying someone they don’t like. I grew up that way. My mom married someone we weren’t all huge fans of, and he didn’t care. He never tried to talk to us, not even after mom died.” 

“Jake-” 

He takes out his wallet, setting a few bills down. “Don’t tell her you saw me.” 

“Fine,” she sighs. “Can you at least tell me where you’re staying?” 

“I’ll be crashing on Coyote’s couch for a few days.” 

“And then?” He shrugs, “see you around Penny.”  

-

You open your eyes, glancing over your shoulder to see Penny standing there, and jolt. “Jeez!” 

“Sorry, hon. I tried to be gentle, but you wouldn’t budge.” 

You push yourself up, “sorry. I take it since you’re here, you picked the kids up?” 

“No, I left them to run the bar.” 

“You’ve been hanging out with Pete for too long. His- whatever is rubbing off on you.” 

She scoffs, “oh, please. If anything, it’s me making him less of an old man.” She sits down beside your legs, rubbing your knee in a comforting manner. “I saw him earlier.” 

You don’t say anything, your eyes shift downwards. 

“He looked really upset.” 

“Did he?” 

“He already misses you and the kids.” 

“Yeah.” 

“Don’t give me that fake “I don’t care attitude”. I know you’re upset he’s gone but it’s not like you won’t see him. He just doesn’t want to come between you, Maryanne, or Edwin but he still cares about all of you and wants to help out.” 

You wrap your arms around your abdomen, “I know that.” 

“Why can’t you two talk it out?” 

“I’ve tried to have us talk but no one wants to listen.” 

“Okay, okay. Breathe.” 

“I am but- it’s all gotten so complicated.”

-

Penny leaves before dinner time. 

You finish preparing their plates, setting them on the dining table. “You two start eating, I’ve got to make sure my makeshift office space is ready after dinner.” 

“Where’s Jake? We always have dinner together,” says Edwin. 

You freeze, handing the two their utensils. “Oh- um- he’s got- he got caught up with work and won’t be here for a little while.” 

“Is he gonna be, okay?” Maryanne asks. 

You slowly stand up, giving them a sad smile, “yeah, yeah, he is.” You exit the kitchen. 

-

“Is mama not gonna eat with us since Jake’s gone?” Edwin asks his sister. 

“I don’t know, Eddie. I don’t like this.” 

“Same.” 

“After dinner we can watch a movie. Maybe mama won’t be so busy.” 

He nods, “okay.” 

“Go pick a movie.” Maryanne pushes her brother towards the living room and realizes what she said. “No Ice Age!” 

“Ice Age is a good movie!” 

-

A knock on your door gets you moving faster, you pat your face dry, hoping the bloodshot look will go away soon. “Come in, Maryanne.” 

“How did you know it was me?” 

“You and your brother have very different knocks.” 

“Obviously if you can tell who’s who when we knock. Do you want- were you crying?” 

“No, what makes you say that?” 

“Your eyes are puffy. Is it because of Jake? Did he make you cry?” 

You chuckle, “no, sweetheart.” 

“Well, then where is he?” 

“I told you; he has a few work things he needs to do.”

“If he’s leaving like dad just tell me, I can handle it.” 

You swoop her into a hug after seeing the way her bottom lip quivers. You take a step back, sitting on the edge of your bed. “No, no, no. He’s not leaving. He’s just- he doesn’t want to- he says he wants us to have a better relationship with one another.” 

“We already do.” 

“You think so?” 

She nods. 

You sweep the hair covering her eyes out of her way, “what do you think of him?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Do you like him?” 

“I… yeah.” 

“Do you not like, Jake?” 

“He’s nice and tries...” 

“Can I ask you why you two are hesitant on letting him into our life?” 

She doesn’t say anything. 

“Do you think he’s gonna be like your dad?” 

“I don’t want him to leave,” says Edwin from your bedroom door. 

You open your other arm, giving him room to squeeze in. “Did you like him?” 

“We both do.” 

“Eddie!” 

“I’m tired of you not telling mama what you mean. We both like him.” 

“You do?” 

He nods, “uh-huh. But we don’t want him to be like dad.” 

“Oh, he wouldn’t-” 

“Where is he now?” 

“...He’s giving us space because he thinks you don’t like him.” 

“We do!” He bounces around, “we do! Call him. Make him come home.” 

“We can’t make him come home, if he doesn’t want to,” Maryanne points out. “Can we call him tomorrow?” 

“We’ll see.” 

“Can we watch Ice Age now?” You chuckle, “I’m not leaving you alone with Jake again. He’s corrupted your movie likes and dislikes.” 

The kids run out of your room. 

You change into something a little comfier before exiting the room. 

Maybe there is light at the end of this tunnel. 

-

Edwin was the first to fall asleep, you went out next, leaving your little girl to be the sole survivor. 

She grabs her phone off the side table, going to her camera app. She angles herself closer and takes a selfie with the three of you. 

LittleDarlin 

*image* Miss you Sent Read 8:39pm. 

Jake puts his shirt on, checking his phone before winding down for bed. His heart starts to race a little when he sees it’s from his little girl. He opens the message and his heart melts. 

SouthernSavior 

Miss you too, darlin Sent Read 8:41pm. 

Shouldn’t you be asleep? Sent Read 8:42pm. 

LittleDarlin

Eddie put Ice Age on Sent Read 8:42pm. 

SouthernSavior

 Not a good excuse. Go to bed Sent Read 8:43pm. 

LittleDarlin typing… Can you come home? Deleted 

LittleDarlin

Night Jake Sent Read 8:45pm. 

SouthernSavior 

Night darlin Sent Read 8:45pm. 

Before Jake turns his phone off and puts it on the charger, he sets the photo as his lockscreen. 

-

Three days later…

A knock on the front door alerts you. 

You’re confused until you realize it’s a school day and pop out of bed, running out of your room. You check their rooms, finding neither of them there. “Not in the living room or kitchen,” you gasp. “The kitchen.” 

-

You run in, seeing your kids putting their dishes in the sink. “Was no one going to wake me up?” 

“You know Jake takes us to school,” Maryanne argues. 

“He does but with everything that’s going on, I didn’t know what we were gonna do.” 

“I’m still on school duty.” 

You scream, jumping just about ten feet in the air. You bring your hand up, placing it on your chest, “don’t. Do. That.” 

“I have to get your heart pumping somehow,” he answers you with that damn cocky smirk you’ve grown to love. 

“Yeah, and I can send you to work with a foot up your a-s-s.” 

“We can spell,” your daughters chimes in. 

“Pretend you can’t.” 

“Come on, d- Jake. Let’s go before we’re late.” 

The two try to walk past you, until you clear your throat. 

“What?” 

“Hug your mother, kids,” he says, standing beside you. 

Edwin rolls his eyes and sighs in a joking way before launching himself into your arms. 

Maryanne walks over to give you a quick hug before dragging her brother outside behind her. 

-

Jake hesitates to place his hand on your lower back. 

You turn, almost automatically curling into him. “Hey there, sailor.” 

“Still not a sailor but, hello to you too, gorgeous.” 

“Can we talk later?” 

“Is it a good talk or a bad talk?” 

“Depends, are you gonna listen to me or not?” 

“When don’t I listen to you?” 

You arch your brow. 

“Fine, I’ll listen.” He walks to the door when you remember something. 

“Oh, wait! Edwin has early day today.” 

“What time?” 

“Like Thursday.” 

He quietly groans to himself, “I won’t be able to pick him up.” 

“It’s okay. I planned on picking him up anyway. I just wanted you to know so you’re not sitting and waiting at the school for too long.” 

“Are you always this thoughtful?” 

There it is again. You give him a sarcastic smile, “are you always a pain in my ass?” 

“I’d like to think otherwise.” 

“In other words, yes.” 

“If that’s what you want to call me then fine.” 

A car honk alerts the two of you. 

“I gotta go. I’ll see you later, yeah?” 

“You can count on it. Bye, Jake.” You lean up and peck him on the lips. You aim to head back into the kitchen when you’re pulled back. 

He cups your cheek, pulling you closer, “is this, okay?” 

“I’d say it’s more than okay.” 

The corner of his mouth tugs upwards, “knew you could never resist me.” 

“Shut up and kiss me.” 

“Yes ma’am.” His other hand wraps around your waist, bringing you closer to him. 

You place your hands on his arms, one hand slides along his shoulders, stopping at the base of his neck. You scratch the back of his neck near the edge of his hairline. 

He slightly shivers pulling back; he pecks your pink, wet, and swollen lips. “I gotta go drop them off,” his voice comes out hoarse and quiet. 

You nod, “mmhmm.” 

“You can kiss later! We’ve gotta go or we’ll be late!” 

You cover your mouth, hiding your laughter. “You heard the girl.” 

“Hey, I didn’t start this whole thing.” 

“Neither did I.” 

“Let’s call it a truce and you go take the kids to school.” 

“I’ll see you later.” 

“Bye, hon.” 

“Bye, gorgeous.” 

-

You and Edwin do his homework before you put on a movie (yes, Ice Age) for him. You turn your head to see the mess in the backyard. 

You sigh, getting up off the couch to clean it up. You were doing good, making a lot of progress until you didn’t. 

You fall, landing on your shoulder. You know you’re screwed, the pain radiating in your arm is too much, but you can’t freak out because your baby boy will freak out which won’t solve anything. 

You push yourself off the ground (with great difficulty) and enter the house. 

“Eds,” you whisper, sitting beside him with your arm close to you. 

“Yeah?” he asks, slightly distracted by the movie. 

“Can you call Aunt Penny for me and hold the phone to my ear?” 

“Why?” 

“I fell.” 

“Are you okay?!” 

You shush him, “breathe, sweetheart. Breathe.” 

“Where’s your phone? Where’s your phone?” 

“Look at the table beside you.” 

“Okay, Penny… Penny… Aunt Penny? Mom wants to talk to you.” He holds the phone against your ear. 

“Pen? Hey… can you come over and drive me to the emergency room? I fell and broke something.”  

-

Jake rushes into the emergency center, frantically searching for you with Maryanne holding his left hand. He stops when he sees Penny waving, letting him know where you and Edwin are. 

He rushes over to the two of you while the poor little girl is being yanked over to your bed. He makes sure Maryanne can hold your hand and get close to you before he sets his hand on top of your head. “Are you okay?” 

“I will be if I can get out of here.” 

He checks over you, stopping when he sees your arm resting across your stomach, “what happened?” 

“I was in the backyard cleaning up-” 

“I told you I would do it.” 

“Yeah, and that was before you…” you trail off unsure of how to say it without making it sound mean, ‘before you left,’ yeah, not the nicest thing to say ever. 

“You could have called me. No, you should have called me.” 

You open your mouth to respond when Penny moves the kids away from the bed, having them sit in the seats (she grabbed earlier) giving you two more room to talk. 

He reaches down for your hand without looking, letting you squeeze his hand, knowing you aren’t taking any of the morphine or other pain medication (because you don’t like how you feel afterwards). He leans down, letting you turn your head into his chest, “why didn’t you call me?” 

“I didn’t know.” 

“Didn’t know what?” 

You look up at him through your wet lashes, blinking repeatedly so you can see him. “I didn’t know how we were. After this morning-” 

“Hey, hey.” He brushes the few loose strands that cover your face back, “we are never gonna change.” He pecks your forehead before turning around. 

-

He takes a step closer to Penny, whispering, “can you take them somewhere else? Ice cream? Hospital cafeteria? Wherever. I don’t want them to see their mom in anymore pain. I know, Eddie is gonna have a hard time when we get home but I’m not letting them see any more of this.” He pulls out his wallet. 

She places her hands on his stopping him, “you don’t need to do that. I’ve got it besides I’ve been wanting to show them a few shells I found the other day.” 

He lets out a breath of relief, “thank you.” 

“You can thank me by taking care of your wife.” She turns around, facing the two. “Come on, kids. We’re gonna go back to Aunt Penny’s place and look at the few seashells I found, and we can prank Pete. How’s that sound?” 

“We don’t want to leave our mom, Aunt Penny,” Maryanne whispers to the older woman. 

“I know but Jake thinks it would be smart if you two aren’t stuck in the emergency center for hours.” 

The young girl glances over at the two of you, watching how Jake is consoling you and trying to distract you from the pain. She looks back at Penny and nods, “okay. Can we text Jake and ask him when we can go home?” 

“Of course, we can,” she holds her hands out for the two to hold. 

Maryanne looks back to see nothing but love between the two of you. Maybe she was wrong, maybe Jake won’t be like her dad. 

He came just seconds after Penny called him and made sure that both of them could see and touch you. 

She feels bad for how she’s been treating him and knows what she needs to do.

-

“You should have called me,” he whispers into your hair. 

“I wanted to.” 

“Why didn’t you? You know I would have been there in a second. Well, maybe not a second but,” he smirks but you can see the worry on his face. 

You scoff, rolling your eyes, “don’t make me hit you.” 

He hums, “it seems to me like you can’t.” 

“I can do other things.” 

“Oh, yeah. Like what?” 

“Well, if I tell you then it won’t be a surprise.” 

He sticks his bottom lip out, “come on, you know you want to tell me.” 

“No, I really don’t.”

-

Jake hasn’t removed his arm from around your waist since you were released (after texting Penny). 

“You can let go now.” 

“I gotta make sure my girl is taken care of.” 

“You are by making sure I can get to my car.” 

“That was never the plan because that’s a, dangerous and b, penny took your car remember. Seems like you’re stuck with me, gorgeous.” 

“Jake,” you start, ready to complain. 

“No, no. Don’t give me that attitude. I’m making sure you get home back to the kids safely. End of story.” 

You say nothing as he opens the door for you, letting you take your time getting the car. 

Once your seated, he helps you with your seatbelt before running to the back, grabbing a pillow to place under your arm (that’s in a secure sling) but that doesn’t stop him. 

The drive back to the house was quiet, at least, between the two of you, there was music softly playing filling some of the silence.

-

He jogs around to the other side of car, opening the door. He reaches in to unbuckle the seatbelt. 

You scoot to the edge of the seat, swinging your legs out of the car. Jake holds his hand out for you to take. You slap your hand on his, “I’m gonna need a little help getting out. Take the pillow, first.” 

He carefully removes the pillow, tossing it to the driver’s seat. He lets you push yourself out before he wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you closer. 

You take a deep breath, staring at his collarbone (since your eye level with it), your eyes slowly trail up his neck, past his jawline and cheekbone. 

It feels like you’ve lost your breath as you stare into his eyes, reminding you of when you two first started dating. 

He moves your hand onto his shoulder before sliding his other arm to your waist, pulling you closer to hug you. He rests his head on your shoulder before tucking his head into the crook of your neck. 

You slide your hand across his shoulder, stopping at his neck, brushing your thumb vertically against the base of his hair, feeling the top of his spinal cord. 

The two of you wet the others shoulder with your salty, relief ridden tears. 

He pulls back, staring at you without wiping his cheeks. 

You reach up and wipe away his tears. 

He does the same for you. “Let’s get you inside, yeah?” He removes one arm to close the car door, locking it right after. 

-

He unlocks the front door, gently shoving you inside, following after you. 

You let out a quiet breath of relief, you were scared he was going to leave after hugging you. 

The kids run out of the living room, stopping in front of you. 

You bend down, letting them hug your good side with Jake telling them to be careful and not tug your neck. 

Maryanne steps away from you, telling Jake to bend down. She wraps her arms around his neck, giving him a hug. 

Edwin does the same. 

You wipe your cheeks, not wanting to cry even though this is what you’ve been waiting for.

-

Three months later...

Maryanne stands in front of you, “mama?” 

“Yeah, baby?” You turn to look at her, seeing how she looks down at the ground. You furrow your brows, “what’s wrong? Are you feeling, okay?” You place the back of your hand on her forehead. She pulls your hand away from her forehead and shakes her head. “Did you break something?” 

“No... I want to do something for Jake.” 

You nod, smiling (happy to know no one’s hurt or sick). “Okay, like what?” 

“I- we want to do something for him for… Father’s Day.” 

The smile slowly falls from your face, “oh,” you gulp. “Did you two have something in mind? And know that just because we’re getting married doesn’t mean that you have to do anything. I know we’ve had a hard time adjusting with one another,” you move the few strands of hair that fell off her face. “He would be happy with anything whether we do something or not.” 

She pouts, “I know but we want him to know that we like him and- and that we want him to be our dad.” 

“And how do you plan on doing that?” 

“Can he adopt us?” 

You lift your hand up, covering your mouth, shocked at her surprising request. 

“Mama?” 

You shake your head, blinking your eyes rapidly to prevent the tears from falling. You wrap your arms around her shoulders pulling her in for a tight hug. “Oh, my sweet girl.” You detach yourself from her, holding her by her shoulders, “that is more than okay, sweetheart. And you’re sure this is something you and Edwin want?” 

She nods as a smile tugs at the corners of her lips. 

“We should start now if we want it ready by then huh?”

-

The wedding was a small one with only Jake’s fellow pilots, WSO’s, and other navy members invited. You both invited his sister, but she was pregnant with baby number four and was unable to fly over.

She was kind enough to call and say that she and her husband would drive over, but it’d take too long for them to arrive. You assured her that it was okay, and she would be missed (you were so close to getting to hear embarrassing stories about pre-pilot Jake).

You didn’t let Jake see you before the wedding (much to his displeasure).

You walk down the aisle with Penny and Amelia walking you down the aisle. When you asked the girls, it easily became one of the most emotional moments when it came to planning the wedding, but you have no regrets (even if the few photos of you three walking down the aisle were of the Benjamin girls crying the entire time).

It was something else when you two were married by Pete.

And, of course, Maryanne was the most adorable flower girl ever making sure used all the petals in her basket and Edwin was a handsome ring bearer.

Thank God you didn’t assign anyone with this task because when Mickey and Logan were asking you a while ago, they showed you the website where you could rent a bear. Of course, this was a joke… you hoped anyway but they did redeem themselves by helping out with all the guy’s suits (after giving them the “mom” look).

Almost everyone- that’s a lie, everyone was crying, no matter how hard you tried not to, you did.

The water works got worse when Jake gave his vows. The man may be cocky as hell, but the man knows when to put his heart and soul into something.

-

Jake could barely keep his hands to himself when Pete said, “you may now kiss the bride.”

“More like devour the bride,” Bradley mutters. Jake pulls back, needing air, knowing you need the same.

“Can it chicken, you’re just jealous.”

The mustache man scoffs, prepared to say something else when Javy pulls him off to the side, handing him a drink. “To the happy couple!”

Javy and Bradley are the first to raise a glass. “To the happy couple!”

-

“To my stunning and gorgeous wife,” he whispers in your ear.

“And to my charmingly cocky husband.”

“I see how it is. I compliment you and you insult me.”

“It’s all part of my charm.”

“You weren’t this mean when we first started going out.”

“I didn’t want to show you my dark side.”

“Sure, you didn’t.”

“Okay, enough you two,” Penny takes your drinks from you two, “it’s time for the first dance.”

You let out a dramatic sigh, “if we must.”

“Prepare to have your heels knocked off your feet.”

You place your hand on his shoulder, “play on the usual phrase, I see you’ve been studying with Edwin.”

He smirks, “’course I have. I wanted to impress you.”

“Oh,” you chuckle, “impress me? I see.”

“No more talking, more dancing.”

-

The song ends and you feel light tugging and look down to find your babies standing there.

“Looks like it’s time for family’s first dance,” DJ Bob announces, adding airhorns.

“I’m never letting baby on board DJ for us again.”

“Oh, c’mon, he’s doing good. Leave him be,” you tell your husband.

“This is a special request coming from the shortest guy here this evening and no, I’m not talking about Fanboy.”

Reuben, Natasha, and Billy cover their mouths to prevent them from spitting out their drinks.

Pete, Penny, Amelia, and Callie shake their heads.

Logan and Bradley shake their heads.

Javy and Bringham hold Mickey back from going after a power-hungry DJ Bob and Neil grabs the camera before the photographer of the evening, can drop it.

An Ice Age remix comes through the speakers and you three look down at Edwin, who innocently shrugs, “what?”

You and Jake glance back at one another and shake your heads, dancing until your feet begin to hurt.

-

Javy and Bob help back the car with wedding presents while Jake puts the kids in the back, letting them get comfortable and fall asleep.

-

“Thank you, boys.” 

Javy gives you a rare, sweet smile, “anything for the newly Mrs. Seresin.”

Your lips quickly tug into an upward smile, “I haven’t heard that yet.”

“It feel weird?” “You know what? It doesn’t.”

“What doesn’t?” The man of the hour asks.

“Nothing.”

“And… we’re done. You two ready to go?” Bob interrupts.

“We are. Are one of you driving the car back to our place?”

“No, we’re gonna leave it here for the racoons to rip open and bring to you later tomorrow.”

“Just because you’re Jake’s friend, doesn’t mean that I won’t hesitate to kick your ass, Machado.”

Your husband wraps an arm around your waist pulling you back, “okay and that’s enough excitement for one day.”

“We’ll see you two there.”

Bob waves to you with his usual, adorable smile dancing across his lips.

-

You wave back before Jake holds you against the passenger door. “How do you feel?”

“Like I’m walking on air, husband of mine.”

“Glad to know I’m not the only one. Let’s go home.”  

-

The day after the wedding…

You and Jake sit beside one another on the couch, looking through your wedding album, taking a break from opening presets.

“Aw,” you point to the photo Maryanne sent him a while ago. “When did we take this?”

“Our little darlin’ sent me this when we were- uh-” Jake scratches the back of his head, “away from each other.”

“Oh… why didn’t you ever show me this? Send it to me.”

“Can I never have a cute family photo for myself?”

You sigh, “I suppose you can.”

He shakes his head, “don’t you be trying to guilt trip me now, gorgeous.”

“Me? Guilt trip you, never.” You flip to another page, “wow!”

“Guess the kid is as good with a camera on the ground like he is in the air.”

“Yeah, I’ll say. We are so using him for the kid’s birthdays.”

You can feel the vibrations of him chuckling behind you.

“Guess that means we save a few bucks.”

“Don’t tell me now that we’re married, you’re going cheap on me.”

He scoffs, “never… I just didn’t expect Fanboy to be so good.”

“Wow, no wonder he was hesitant to ask me.” You shake your head, setting the album on the table and see the last gift on the table is the big one. “This one is from the kids, but we have to wait until they wake up.”

“What?” Jake whines.

“Please,” you plead.

“Fine, fine. Stop giving me those “sex” eyes.”

You scoff, “I am not giving you “sex” eyes. If anyone is giving those eyes, it’s you.”

“Wow!”

“I know, it sucks when your words come back to bite you in the ass, right?”

“I know something else that can bite you in the ass.”

“God! We just got married and it’s like you’ve become ten times hornier within twenty-four hours.”

“You just have that effect on me, gorgeous.”

-

“Did he open it yet?” Maryanne asks, scaring the shit out of you two.

You and Jake scream, the latter lets out an oof. “What happened? Are you okay?”

He shakes his head, holding his stomach, “no.”

You cringe, realizing what you did. “Oh, honey. I’m sorry, are you okay?”

“My poor, beautiful abs.”

You scoff, smacking his arm, “you’re fine.” You turn to look at the kids, “and no he did not. I wanted you two to be here with us.”

They run over to the couch, sitting on each side of him.

You grab the rectangular, thin box, handing it to him.

“You not gonna help me with this one?”

You shake your head, trying to hide your smile, “no, this one’s all you, honey.”

He narrows his eyes at you before looking back at the gift, ripping the gift open. He tosses the box to the side, holding a large manilla envelope. He stares at it with furrowed brows, “what-”

“Just open it,” you tell him.

He carefully opens it, pulling out the document. He starts to read it, “what-” his voice cracks. Jake scoots forward, setting everything on the coffee table so he can cover his eyes.

“Aw, honey,” you start.

The kids stare at you with wide eyes, unsure if this is a good reaction or not. They scoot off the couch, standing in front of him, wrapping their arms around his shoulders.

He returns the gesture. “I know we had a hard time gettin to know each other in the beginning,” he lifts his head, staring back and forth between the two, “but did you two really have to make a grown man cry?”

“We made you cry?” Your daughter asks.

“You should have been worried if I didn’t cry.”

“Fair point.”

You rub the back of his shoulder.

He looks back at you, “how long have you known about this?”

“Too long. I’m just happy your late/ early Father’s Day gift finally made its way to you."

“This is a- okay, new rule, give the old man a little warning so I have time to prepare myself.”

“Nah,” you shake your head, “this is better. We get the raw emotions.”

“Shut up,” he shoves your thigh.

You smile, leaning back against the couch.

“Let’s a movie… not Ice Age,” he pulls Edwin closer, “whispering”, “we’ll watch it when the girls aren’t here.”

The young boy nods, giggling, “okay.”

Maryanne settles in on your side with Jake on your left, an arm wrapped around your shoulders and Edwin on his left.

“Oh, wait. We need popcorn,” says your daughter.

“Let’s go.” Edwin pulls her into the kitchen, preparing the movie snacks.

-

He pulls you closer. 

“I told you they like you.”

He doesn’t say anything for a few seconds, “okay, maybe you were right.”

“I was so right, darlin.”

“Look at you trying to copy my accent.”

“Honey, I pull that accent off better than you.”

“Oh, is that how we’re playing it?”

“You bet.”

“How about we cut this competition short?”

“Oh, yeah. How’s that-”

He cups your cheek, pulling you in for a kiss.

“We’re done- ew!”

You can’t help but smile as you two part from one another.

“Alright, kids. Settle in,” he tells them.

They return to their previous seats.

You rest your head against his shoulder.

This is exactly how you pictured it, the family life with Jake.  

-

Prev // Next

TGTBATWOI Master List

-

Taglist: @abaker74​ @ebonyhogan24 @shanimallina87 @starkleila​ @kurtkunkle17

#top gun maverick #Top Gun: Maverick #top gun #top gun x reader #top gun maverick imagines #top gun mavreick imagine #top gun maverick x reader #jake hangman seresin #jake hangman seresin x reader #top gun fanfiction #top gun maverick fanfic #top gun fanfic #top gun maverick fanfiction #jake seresin x reader #jake hangman seresin imagine #jake hangman seresin imagines #jake seresin fanfic #jake seresin fanfiction #jake hangman seresin fanfic #jake hangman seresin fanfiction #jake seresin #crazyk-imagine

[wheresarizona]

Gif by the incredible @pedropascalsx

Needy

summary: You’re running late for work, but skipping breakfast is worth Javier fucking you against the bathroom counter.

warning: E (18+!! No y/n, Soft Javier Peña (but he fucks hard), unprotected p in v (wrap it up!), mirror sex, creampie, dirty talk, praise kink, hair pulling (no descriptions of hair), spit mention, an ass slap, Javier feeling really bad about making you sore, bath, Javier taking care of you)

pairing: Javier Peña/f!reader

word count: 3.3k+

a/n: Can be read as a standalone, or a part of the Learning to Live ‘verse. @iamskyereads sent me something that made me go, “Oh yes, I gotta write that!” and it fit with a prompt from @chasing-the-dark for my follower celebration that was, “Stay here, and I’ll run you a bath.” Combine those with @theorganasolo wishing for some mirror sex, and here we are. This one’s for you three, and I hope you enjoy! Shoutout to @juletheghoul for checking the vibe.

Thank you for reading! Comments and reblogs are appreciated!

Series Masterlist - Main Masterlist

The alarm clock hadn’t gone off.

You’d set it before bed, but there was a thunderstorm in the middle of the night, and the power must have gone out because when you woke up, the red numbers were blinking a time that it definitely wasn’t simply based on the light spilling through the curtains.

When you’d checked your watch on the bedside table, it confirmed you’d overslept, and now you were in a hurry to get ready, standing in the bathroom brushing your teeth.

Movement could be heard from the bedroom of Javi getting out of bed, the springs in the mattress creaking as he got up.

“Cielito?” His voice was thick from sleep, deep and raspy, his footsteps getting closer.

You leaned over the sink spitting out the toothpaste and turning on the water to wash it down the drain, cleaning your toothbrush before putting it in the holder.

“Morning, babe,” you answered, Javi appearing in the doorway, seeing his face puffy from sleep, eyes big and round in the mirror. He was completely naked, unabashed by his nudeness, his hair an absolute mess atop his head.

“You weren’t in bed,” he pouted.

You turned your head to look at him, taking in his broad shoulders filling the doorframe. He had a dark hickey at the base of his throat, another fading over his pulse point, freckles dotting his tanned skin, his softened belly looking kissable, the tantalizing trail of dark hair leading down to his very hard dick jutting out from his hips.

“I’m sorry, baby,” you said. “The alarm didn’t go off, and I’m running late for work.”

He was still frowning as he walked up behind you and wrapped his arms around your middle, feeling his warm skin flush against your back, the hard line of his cock pressing into your lower back while he rested his chin on your shoulder to meet your eyes in the mirror.

“I had a dream,” he sighed, kissing your neck.

“You had a dream?” You asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Yeah,” he spoke into your skin. “We were in a field or park, somewhere with grass and the sun shining down on us—you wearing one of your pretty fucking dresses, and riding me, tits in my face, and I woke up, wanting….” He squeezed his eyes shut, letting out a frustrated groan.

You were suddenly feeling hot and a little upset that you had to get ready instead of getting dicked down. You lifted your hand behind you to rub at his hair, stroking your fingers along his scalp.

“Oh, my poor, sweet Javi baby waking up horny,” you cooed. “I’m sorry there wasn’t time for morning sex, but you could probably jerk off before you go to work.”

He lifted his head, meeting your gaze and giving you puppy dog eyes which was honestly playing dirty.

“What if I was quick?” He ground his hips into you, letting you feel how hard he was. “I can be,” he sounded hopeful. “I can be quick and get you there, baby. You know I can.” His throat worked as he swallowed. “Can I fuck you? Please, baby?”

You bit your lip at the thought, checking the time on the watch you were wearing.

If you skipped breakfast and making coffee, there was definitely time for a quickie, and the way he was practically begging and so needy had you throbbing between your legs.

“I can grab something to eat at work,” you said, looking at him again. “Fuck me, Javi. Make me feel good, but do it quick—I’ll get so much shit if I’m late to work because of sex.”

He smiled, his eyes glazing over with want, his chocolate brown pupils going black. His hand came up to turn your head, him leaning in to kiss you at the awkward angle, all misaligned, with a nip to your lower lip when he pulled away.

“You’re too fucking perfect,” he rasped, looking into your eyes adoringly before he was moving behind you.

He stepped back, pulling your hips with him.

“Hang onto the counter, Cielito,” he said.

You bent forward, gripping the edge, Javi spreading your legs, his hand moving to your center between your thighs, sliding his fingers through your wetness.

He hummed appreciatively in the back of his throat, “So fucking wet for me.”

“Always,” you moaned. Your head fell between your shoulders when he rubbed circles against your clit, making sparks jolt into your core.

“Can you take my dick like this, baby?” He asked. “Or do you want me to loosen you up?”

“No time,” you gasped. “Just fuck me,” wiggling your ass.

He chuckled, his hand leaving you. You lifted your head, watching in the mirror as Javi spit onto his fingers, using them to get his cock wet. The thick head of him, wet and warm, pressed against your entrance, his attention between your bodies, his free hand holding your hip steady—you moaned when he pushed in, your fingers digging into the countertop, Javi rocking his thickness into you and stretching you open, inch by inch, until finally, he was flush against your ass.

You felt so full, pussy fluttering around him.

“Fuck,” Javi groaned, his eyes closing and mouth falling open. “Shit, that’s good.”

“Feel so good,” you replied. “Move.”

His hands gripped your hips, Javi pulling almost all the way out and thrusting back into you hard. Your eyes rolled back in your head, soft sounds slipping from your throat as he started fucking into you, going faster and harder with every stroke until he was setting a punishing pace that had your brain feeling fuzzy. Your body was jolting from the onslaught, having to keep yourself from falling onto the counter, Javi feeling so fucking good inside you, the fire beginning to build in your belly.

“So fucking good to me,” his words were said through gritted teeth. “Perfect fucking pussy, taking me so fucking well. Fuck, you’re perfect.”

You could hear his thrusts getting wetter, the slap of his skin against yours as he pistoned into you, building you up, pushing you closer to your release. His hand glided along your spine, up the back of your neck, and into your hair, getting purchase at your roots and pulling your head up.

“Open your eyes, baby,” his voice was still husky from sleep, and you complied, meeting his heated gaze, seeing his mouth slack, eyebrows furrowed, chest flush, and skin glistening with sweat. His arm was out in front of him, while his cock continued to spear into you over and over again. “Look at how fucking beautiful you are,” he rasped. You could see how good you felt on your face, mouth open in a perfect ‘o,’ eyes half-lidded, and brow shiny. “So fucking beautiful—can’t get enough of you.”

The fire inside you became a full-on inferno, overtaking your body, consuming you; your body wound so fucking tight that at any second, you were going to combust. His other hand moved to your front, his thick fingers circling against your clit, keeping his eyes on yours.

“Come on,” he grunted, a bead of sweat rolling down his face. Your moans were stuttered from how hard he was fucking you, the sounds being pushed from your lungs. “Come on, Cielito. Give it to me, baby. Come for me. I know you’re almost there.”

The hand in your hair pulled you up a little further, making you arch your back, and it had his cock rubbing against a spot that pulled a long whining moan from you.

“There it fucking is,” he said.

He zeroed in on it, slamming into you repeatedly, Javi grunting from the force.

Everything came together—his cock, his fingers, his words—it had you falling over the edge with a cry of his name, pleasure overtaking your body, bright and hot in your veins, clenching so hard around him that Javi was forced to grind his hips into you.

“That’s it,” he groaned. You opened your eyes to see his head thrown back, the long line of his throat on display, watching his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed. “My good fucking girl.” He helped you ride out your high, your body tingling, and mind floaty, chest heaving while he ground his length into your wet heat.

His head came up, letting go of your hair to wrap his arm around your chest and pull you up against his front, his chin on your shoulder, hearing his hard breaths.

He started thrusting again, slowly moving in and out of you, his eyes locked on yours.

“Can I come inside you?” He husked, voice deep and sending a tingle down your spine.

Your thoughts felt like molasses, but his question had you answering quickly.

“Yes,” you nodded. “Want it.”

His body was sturdy behind you, feeling the warmth of his skin and dampness from his perspiration.

He kissed your neck, speeding up his movements, quickening his hips while he chased his high. You pushed your ass back against him, meeting his thrusts, feeling his warm breath as he grunted. His eyes were lust-blown, face screwed up like he was in pain, his mouth kissing the skin of your shoulder and neck.

The sound of him pounding into you was echoing around the small room, his hips slapping against the plump flesh of your ass, able to hear the wet suck of your pussy—he was going hard enough you knew you’d be sore later, but you didn’t care, not when it felt so fucking good.

His hand was holding your breast, his other arm wrapped around your waist to keep you against him, your brain a pleasurable haze as you moaned his name. The palm on your chest moved up, Javi turning your head so he could lean in to messily kiss you at the odd angle, his tongue pressing between your lips to slide along your own.

You knew he was close when his rhythm got jerky, his mouth finding its way to the crook of your neck, Javi panting before he pushed in hard, his teeth sinking into the meat of your shoulder and making you hiss as you felt the wet pulse of him coming inside you with a rumbling groan.

His hips ground into you, feeling him fucking his come in deep until it became too much, and he stilled, breathing hard against you, soothing the bite with kisses.

You lifted a hand up to push your fingers through his sweat-damp hair.

“Feel better, baby?” You asked.

He lifted his head, a blissed-out look on his face.

“Yeah,” he nodded, smiling. “Feel fucking fantastic.”

You smiled back.

“I do, too. Gotta take a quick shower,” you checked the time on your watch. “If I jump in and jump out, I can get dressed and leave—should arrive to work on time.”

He frowned, those eyes of his going rounder.

“I can’t join you?” He asked softly.

You couldn’t help but giggle.

“It will literally be a five-minute shower, and you are distracting.”

He was pouting.

“I can keep my hands to myself.”

You gave him a look.

“That’s a dirty lie, and we both know it.”

He sighed.

“Yeah, you’re right.” He pulled out of you, a gasp falling from your lips, Javi turning you to face him. “I’ll bring you breakfast and coffee before I head out to the ranch.”

“You’ll be late for work….” You pointed out.

His big hands came up to cup your cheeks as he leaned in.

“And it’ll be fucking worth it,” he said before kissing you hard. Your hands landed in his hair, opening your mouth when he licked along your lip, moaning at the way he kissed you with fervor, tasting every inch of your mouth until your lungs ached for oxygen.

He pecked you one last time when he broke the kiss, looking at you with soft eyes, the adoration clear in the dark depths.

“I love you, Cielito,” he said.

“I love you, too,” you replied.

One of his hands trailed down your body, moving to your back, and making you jolt when he smacked your ass.

“Javier,” you laughed, slapping his chest playfully. “You’re so ridiculous.”

“Ridiculous for you,” he grinned, grabbing your asscheek. “Now, get in the shower, baby. I gotta take one after you.” He kissed you quickly, leaning past you to grab his toothbrush.

You pinched his ass, earning a chuckle as you went around him to get to the shower, feeling the delicious ache between your legs.

Just as you thought, you arrived to work on time, and as you suspected, you were, in fact, very sore.

Javi had shown up twenty minutes after you’d arrived with breakfast and coffee, him noticing you wincing when you sat down in your chair after kissing him and accepting the food.

The smile on his face was replaced with concern, Javi glancing from side to side to make sure nobody was around before he spoke softly.

“Did I go too hard?” He asked.

“It’s fine,” you said, waving away his concern.

“You’re in pain,” he frowned.

“Javi, it’s not the first time you’ve destroyed my pussy with your dick, and it won’t be the last. As soon as I eat, I’ll take some Tylenol. It’s really no big deal. The pain is worth it,” you smiled reassuringly.

“I don’t like that you’re hurt,” he gulped, looking away.

“Javi, baby, look at me,” his eyes met yours. “You didn’t hurt me. I like when you fuck me hard. I’ll feel fine tomorrow, I’ll just be uncomfortable today, but honestly, it just reminds me of how good it was,” you wiggled your eyebrows. “Don’t fret. I promise I’m okay. Now, you better get going to work. Your dad is going to give you a hard time for being late.”

Your words seemed to have made him feel better, his shoulders relaxing.

“You know Pop loves you—when he hears you were late to work because the power went out and you didn’t have time for breakfast, he’ll commend me for bringing you something to eat.”

Your eyebrow rose.

“Yes, I didn’t have time to eat because my alarm didn’t go off, and not because I chose to get fucked within an inch of my life instead of eating food.”

“I love your priorities,” he smirked, winking at you.

“Yeah, I know you do,” you playfully rolled your eyes.

“Give me a kiss, and I can go.”

You stood up from your chair to lean over your desk, Javi meeting you to kiss you tenderly, his hand sliding along your cheek to hold your face.

“Love you, Cielito,” he whispered when you parted.

“Love you, too, Javi.”

“I’ll see you after work,” he said.

“You better,” you poked his chest. “We live together.”

“We sure the fuck, do,” he grinned.

He leaned in to kiss you one more time, and then he was saying goodbye, and turning to leave your eyes watching him as he walked away.

When you got home for the day, you stripped out of your work clothes, standing in your underwear while you put them in the hamper.

You were surprised when you heard the sounds of the front door being unlocked, checking the time on your watch to see that Javi was home earlier than usual.

Your eyebrows furrowed as you walked into the living room, finding Javi holding a paper grocery bag and emptying his pockets into the large bowl on the entryway table.

“You’re home early,” you said.

He was finished, turning to face you.

“Yeah,” he answered with a smile, walking towards you. He’d removed his shoes, his socked feet padding along the floor. “Wanted to stop by the pharmacy on my way home.” His free hand cupped your jaw when he was in front of you, Javi leaning in to kiss you.

“Hi, Cielito,” he said when he broke the kiss.

“Hi, Javi,” you smiled. “Why’d you stop by the pharmacy?”

“Are you still sore?”

“Yes?”

He nodded.

“Stay here, and I’ll run you a bath,” he kissed your forehead.

“You’ll run me a bath?”

“Yeah. Picked up some Epsom salts—they help when my back is acting up, so I thought they’d help with your aches,” he shrugged.

“Why are you so fucking sweet?”

His eyes softened.

“Just wanna make you feel better.”

You felt almost overwhelmed by the amount of affection you felt for him, feeling so soft you thought you might melt into a puddle.

“Okay,” you nodded. “I’ll take a bath.”

“Go have a glass of water, and I’ll get it ready,” he said, kissing you sweetly before heading towards the bathroom.

Minutes later, you found yourself stepping naked into the tub, the water hot and steaming just how you liked it, hearing Javi in the bedroom moving about.

You were sitting in the bathtub, the water up to your chest, back pressed against the porcelain, legs stretched out in front you. You sighed contentedly as the heat seeped into your skin, relaxing your muscles.

Your eyes were closed when Javi entered the bathroom. You peeked an eye open seeing him in grey sweatpants and a white t-shirt stretching over his chest. He had a book in his hand, and you watched as he lowered himself onto the ground with a groan beside the bath, sitting next to you on the tiled floor.

“You gonna hang out with me?” You asked.

“Yeah.”

“I’d like that,” you smiled.

“I’d like it, too.”

You placed your wet hand on the tub's rim with your palm up, and Javi laced his fingers with yours.

“Tell me about your day,” you said, closing your eyes again and just enjoying yourself.

“Well, I had a really fucking good dream—”

“A sexy dream,” you interrupted.

“Yeah, a really fucking sexy dream, and woke up harder than a fucking rock in an empty bed.”

“What did you do?”

“You know what I did.”

You heard him smirking, and it made you giggle.

“Yes, you seduced me, had me sacrificing sustenance and much-needed coffee for top-tier dick.”

“Didn’t you once say, ‘the best part of waking up—’”

“You have to sing it!” You laughed, reminded of the altered Folger’s Coffee jingle you once sang after excellent morning sex.

“Fine,” he sighed, his voice going a little higher as he mumble sang the following sentence: “The best part of waking up, is Javi in my cunt.”

Laughter burst from you, delighted he actually did it, Javi not able to hold back his own, the two of you laughing hard for a couple of minutes until you finally calmed down.

“I’m a fucking comedian,” you had to wipe tears from your eyes, looking over at him to see him with a big dimpled smile, looking at you fondly.

“You’re the funniest person I know, and I love you,” he turned his upper body, and leaned over the tub, you moving your head to meet his for a kiss.

“I love you, too,” you murmured against his lips.

He pulled back, smiling at you.

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he said.

And from the look on the face, you knew what he said was true, making your throat feel a little tight at how much he loved you.

“You’re easy on the eyes, too, my sexy man. Now, tell me about your day after you dropped off breakfast,” you said, getting comfortable in the tub again, leaning back with your head turned toward him.

He brought your hand up to kiss the back of it, and told you about his day working at the ranch, his voice lulling you, relaxing you deeply, to the point your eyes closed as you listened.

When he finished talking, he asked how work was for you, and you told him, going through the pretty uneventful things, but Javi didn’t care; he wanted to hear all the details like he did every day.

The water was still warm when Javi started reading—a murder mystery the two of you had been taking turns reading chapters aloud to one another.

This was your life, and you couldn’t be happier.

Series Masterlist - Main Masterlist

Thank you for reading! If you’d like to be tagged in my fics, please fill out the form in my bio, on my masterlist, or just let me know! 

Tagging: @nicolethered @lola766 @nessamc @vanemando15 @muffinengineer86 @fiscinthirst @melancholyy-hill @hnt-escape @sherala007 @jadesabre83 @rainbeaubrightchild @blub-senpai @pedrohoe04 @theherothesavior @captain-creampuff @javiersjeans @zetasaturno99 @amb11 @lovedbyth3sun @siidereeus @marvelousmermaid @mrszdjarin  @themarcusmoreno @woomen23 @ms-loverman-066 @star-wars-fan-2005 @kissing-stars @chloeinpink @notyourlovemonkey @unofficialavenger90 @fictionismyreality @sheetsof-lennon @damnyoupedro @absurdthirst @kirsteng42 @littlemisspascal @thevoiceinyourheadx @katareyoudrilling @allfoolsinluv @enjoyourlattebitch @kulicny @athalien @elegantduckturtle @harriedandharassed @girlofchaos

#pedro pascal #javier peña #javier peña x reader #Javier Peña/reader #javier peña smut #wheresarizona writes #wheresarizonas follower celebration #learning to live series

[integra1127grimmreaper]

Baker Wonderland (Javi Gutierrez)

Javi Gutierrez Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Warning: fluff, smut, social bulling, body shaming (by self & others), swearing

Summary: You try to enjoy yourself while accompanying your husband on work, but the celebrity life has other plans for you.

A/N: Y/N- your name. Y/H- your social media handle. Plus size reader Don't know shit about speaking or writing Spanish, therefore I've only used words of endearment that I Googled. Apologies in advance if used incorrectly.

If anyone had told you three years ago that by some divine miracle, you would be living an almost fairytale life; married to one of the most sought-after script writers/producers, the Javi Gutierrez, you would have called them insane.

Here you were though; married to that very man, living your dream in real life with your celebrity crush, while owning your own chain of bakeries.

The dream life you've always wanted. Downside of it was though; no one besides close friends and family knew you were married, (something that both of you had agreed to keep on the downlow for now.)

There had been rumors floating about of the nature of the relationship between you two for the past year and a half that emerged with each new picture of Javi and you out in public. Some amused you to be very close friends, others guessed you were most probably dating.

It wasn't the celebrity status of Javi's that made you hide the relationship for so long. Truth was you, yourself were a bit of a celebrity too, just in the confectionery business side though. Having successfully opened and not soon thereafter expanding your cinematic themed bakeries, even going as far as doing special events for the high elites. Therefore, being in the limelight wasn't something foreign for you, it was just that Javi and you wanted to keep your relationship private for as long as possible. Wanting to enjoy the first months as a married couple just for yourselves.

That peace will be over quite soon though.

"You ready, Cariño? Javi enquires entering the bedroom.

"Mmhmm" you nod smiling at the clear look of excitement on his face.

"Great!" Javi comments, grabbing his wallet and reaching out his hand for you to take.

"I'm only needed on set by 10, so we have roughly two hours to enjoy ourselves before heading there."

"Great" you smile, pressing a kiss to his lips, wrapping your arms around his neck. You had explored the town a bit last week while Javi was off on set but had honestly wanted to do with him.

"What fun adventures do you have in mind?"

"I was thinking, we could go into town for breakfast and do some sightseeing thereafter" Javi suggests.

"Sound like a great plan" you nod, giving him one last kiss before detangling your arms from his neck.

"This is quite nice, no?" Javi remarks, watching the small traffic of the town through the café window you were having breakfast at.

"It's a beautiful place..." you nod in agreement, smiling at the scene of a small family with a toddler girl walking by. You turn back toward Javi then, a bit teary eyed but still smiling.

"I'm glad I agreed to come with."

"As if I would have left you home alone!" Javi scoffs teasingly. Grabbing hold of your hand, gently pressing a kiss to it.

"I want you close to me at all times, mi amor. Especially now..."

"You act as if I'm fragile glass..." you chuckle in response.

"I just want to make sure that your both well taken care of and safe" Javi states in a serious manner.

"You've done a great job with doing so, My Love..." you grip his hand in reassurance.

"Besides, with the first trimester almost over, the morning sickness it almost non-existent."

"I've notice that your appetite has returned in tenfold, yes..." Javi chuckled, staring at your large breakfast spread on the table.

"Don't judge" you point a finger in warning at him.

"I'm growing your unborn offspring inside me."

"I'm not, I'm not..." Javi chuckles out, raising his hands in surrender.

"I'm just glad that you're able to enjoy food again."

You teasingly stick your tongue out Javi, causing him to chuckle and turn your attention back to your food.

"Javi, they're ready on set whenever you are..." his assistant greets as the two of you exited the car.

"Oh-my-gosh!" she gasps out in delight when seeing you.

"I'm so glad you're finally joining us!" Lisa pulls you in for a hug, stepping back a bit to look you over.

"You must have been so bored being cooped up in that villa all by yourself? Not that I'm complaining though, the treats you've sent with Javi each day has been a huge hit amongst the crew."

"Glad you guys enjoyed them..." you chuckle at her.

"Although, I didn't bring any with today. Javi and I decided to do a bit of sightseeing this morning. With the morning sickness having settled down, I could finally leave the house for longer than twenty minutes."

"It's fine..." Lisa shrugs with a hand wave, her face lighting up then.

"How's baby G doing?"

"Much better now that they aren't making their Mama sick anymore" Javi remarks, placing a loving over your stomach.

"That's good to hear!" Lisa squeals out in delight at you.

"Means, we'll see more of you around then."

"Definitely" you chuckle at her.

"And I'll make sure to bring some treats with tomorrow."

"You're the best!" Lisa squeals yet again, finally leaving to see to some work.

"Come, Querida..." Javi chuckles, placing an arm around your waist to lead the way to the set.

After a few hours of watching Javi work, you began to feel a bit sleepy.

"Feeling tired, Querida?" Javi turns his attention to you.

"A bit" you faintly smile at his concern.

Gently brushing some hair behind your ear, Javi presses a kiss to your forehead.

"We'll be taking a lunch break in the next ten minutes, then we can go to the trailer, and you can rest a bit. Ok?"

"Ok" you smirk at him.

Then ten minutes was finally over when Javi came to collect you.

"It's time to feed Mama and the little one..." Javi remarks, making it impossible for you not to smile at the way he lights up when referring to your pregnancy.

"Lead the way, Papi..." you giggle when he lets out a soft groan at your remarks.

"You know what calling me that does to me..." Javi pulls you flushed up against with a growl.

"Behave Papi..." you giggle out.

"We're in public."

"You're going to be the death of me, woman..." he groans in response, quickly leading you toward his trailer.

"I took the liberty of ordering lunch ahead so that you wouldn't have to wait for it to be delivered" Javi states as you enter the trailer.

"Javi..." you beam at him in wonder.

"You're too good to me. Not sure what I did to deserve a man as good as you."

Javi grins at you, wrapping his arms tightly around your waist.

"I'm you're reward for being such a magnificent baker... it's your confectionary goods that won me over in the first places."

"So, you only love me for my baking skills then?" you scoff at his remarks.

"Of course, not..." Javi chuckles, pressing a kiss to your forehead as he stared adoringly into your eyes.

"Though, it's your baking skills that's the reason for us having met in the first place."

You smile up at him at the memory of the first day you both met.

"The first day you walked into the bakery?"

"One of the best days in my life..." Javi smiles lovingly down at you.

"Not only did I get the best Nicholes Cage themed cookies, but I also met the most beautiful woman ever."

"Please..." you teasingly roll your eyes at him.

"Beautiful? I was a total mess from being in the kitchen, baking the entire morning..."

Javi chuckles, cupping your face and running his thumb back and forth across your cheek.

"You had a streak of flour on the right cheek, and it was the cutest thing ever..."

You were about to responds to his remark when suddenly, your stomach growled out loudly.

"I think our unborn offspring is hungry" you burst out laughing and Javi joins in.

Turning you around, Javi leads you toward the food.

"Come Mami... it's time to feed the little one."

"God, I love you..." you moan in appreciation at the baked treats Javi had ordered for dessert.

"I know how much you've been craving sweet treats of lately" Javi remarks smiling as you instantly began devouring them.

"If I wasn't already fat, then these would definitely cause me to be..." you comment in-between bites.

"You're not fat" Javi scowls at you demeaning yourself.

"You're voluptuous, curvaceous... and so fucking sexy."

"Sexy...?" you roll your eyes at him.

"It's true..." he responds, tipping down to press a kiss into the side of your neck.

"The sexiest woman I've ever seen, more so now that she's carrying my child..."

Smiling at his remark, you lift his face to look at you.

"Javi..."

"Yes, Querida...?" he stares in full admiration at you.

"I think I might be craving another type of dessert now..." you confess, biting into your lower lip.

Javi flashes you a devilish grin then.

"Then I best feed this new craving, shouldn't I...?"

"Yes, you should..." you teasingly nod in response, turning your entire body toward him for a kiss.

One of Javi's hands fists into your hair tightly as he captures your lips with his own.

"Lay down for me, Baby..."

With an eager smirk, you laid down to make yourself comfortable on the couch; your breath rapidly quickening when his hands slid up your dress to grip your panties seams.

"Let's get these out the way, Hermosa..."

You lift your hips to allow to him to slip them off, letting out a soft moan when his hands slide back up to squeeze at your fleshy thighs.

Javi carefully leans his body over yours; making sure not to rest his full weight onto you as he nuzzles his face into the crook of your neck.

"Fuck, you always smell so good..." Javi utters out, gently nipping at your neck whist pressing open-mouthed kiss against it.

"Javi..." you groan out in frustration at him continuously ghosting his fingertips across your folds to work you up.

"You know it's not wise to tease your pregnant wife."

"I would never be so cruel, mi amor..." Javi states, causing a gasp to spill from your lips as he sank a finger deep into you.

"Fuck-you're-soaked..." Javi groans out, adding a second finger inside you.

"Jesus, your fingers are huge" you whimper as he worked them in and out you.

"Feeling sensitive today?" Javi whispers against your neck and you hum in answer.

"Could we just skip the foreplay? I badly need in you inside me right now."

Silently nodding, Javi gently extracts his finger from you; pupils blown wide with lust as he licks your arousal from his wet fingers.

"How do you want it, Cariño?"

You couldn't contain the love filled smile that crossed your face as you cupped his face in the palm of your hands. (Even though you had remined him multiple times that your belly was mostly natural fat at the moment than an actual baby bump, Javi's concerns of accidentally hurting the baby with his weight on top of you never seems to cease.)

"I want to enjoy the feeling of you on top me while we still can."

With a silent nod, Javi makes quick work of opening his pants to free the erection that had been painfully restrained by the materiel.

"Look like someone's just as in need of some attention..." you remark, reaching out to tug on his cock.

"You're killing me, Querida..." Javi throws his head back with a heavy groan.

"Feeling sensitive...?" you mimic his words of earlier with a smirk, causing him to glare down at you in warning.

"Baby..."

"Fine, I'll stop teasing..." you giggle, pulling him down onto you for a kiss.

"Fuck..." you moan out against Javi's lips at feeling the tip of his cock sliding through your folds.

"Not so fun being teased now is it...?" Javi smirks, notching the tip at your entrance.

You flash him a glare but before you could voice a retort; a sharp gasp spills from your lips instead when he snaps his hips forward to burying himself inside you completely.

"Jesus... I forgot how huge you are..." you whimper out, causing Javi to bury his face into the crook of your neck with a groan.

"Fuck baby... you're so fuckin' tight... How the hell are you going to push a baby out...?"

"Well, it's your job to make sure I'm well prepared by then..." you giggle, causing your walls to clamp down on him by the motion.

"Shit-" Javi hiss out.

"Don't do that or this is going to be over far quicker than we want."

"Sorry..." you softly snort, another a tiny giggle slipping out again.

Lifting his head from your neck; Javi scowls down at you, bucking his hips hard into you in retaliation.

"That shut you up quick enough, didn't it...?" he smugly remarks at your sharp intake of breath.

"Shut up and fuck me, Gutierrez...!" you manage to growl out, grabbing him by his shirt collar down to kiss you.

"Yes Ma'am..." Javi utters out in amusement against your lips as he finally begins to move in earnest.

You woke up fully refreshed after a nap; (being pregnant seemed to tire you out more than usual these days, especially after a round of sex with your husband.)

It was late afternoon by now, which meant that Javi would soon be wrapping up for the day. Not wanting to disturb him while working, you decide to browse through social media after noticing multiple notifications tagged to your account.

"Javi Gutierrez spotted in Lindos, Greece!" was the caption of the first post you saw, along with a picture secretly taken of Javi and you at the café you were at earlier.

"Is that Y/H the baker?!" someone commented on it.

"Yeah, it's her... but they're friends so it's nothing unusual to see them together" another replied.

"True... but why is she with him...? I mean, he's out there working..." another comments, causing you to physically cringe. (The vultures were circling...)

You couldn't help the smile that crossed your face when reading the next comment.

"Maybe she's just there on vacation? Or... maybe they're dating, lol. They do make a cute couple."

Your mood instantly sours by the new ones that follows though.

"God, I hope not! He's way out of her league... have you seen how she looks? Probably eats most of the bakery's profits, lamo."

"Ikr...? He deserves either a model or hot actress."

Not able to stomach reading the rest, you disable the notifications and logout completely.

"You ready to leave, Cariño?" Javi announces his return.

With a strained smile, you just silently nod in response.

Noticing something was off, Javi reaches out to stroke your cheek.

"You ok?"

"I'm fine" you plaster on a brighter smile to convince him.

Javi squints at you suspiciously, gently running the pad of his thumb across your bottom lip.

"You sure...?"

"Mmhmm..." you nod, continuing to smile at him.

Still not convinced, yet not wanting to upset you; Javi presses a quick kiss to your forehead.

"Ok, let's go then."

You were curled up on the couch in the bedroom when a flustered Javi came storming in with his phone gripped tightly in hand.

"Why didn't you tell me about this?"

You squint at him in confusion.

"Huh?"

"Really? You're going to act like you haven't seen it?" Javi scowls at your attempt of ignorance.

"The picture..." you finally sigh in defeat.

"Yes, the picture" Javi remarks, placing his hands on his hips in displeasure.

Shutting your eyes to stifle a giggle, you eventually lose the battle when a loud chuckle bursts from your lips.

"Why are you laughing? This is serious" Javi scolds you.

"Sorry... sorry..." you giggle, waving your hand in the air.

"It's just... you've already perfected 'the displeased dad" stance..."

The scowl on Javi's face slowly turns into a little smirk the longer you're laughing. Moving forward to take a seat next you, he takes hold of your hand then.

"Jokes aside. Is this the reason why you were acting differently earlier?"

"Have you read the comments?" you enquire.

"Yes, some of them were quite supportive... some were totally assholes though" Javi replies, clearly upset at the negative ones.

"It's fine. I know I'm not the ideal life partner for you" you remark in attempt to calm him.

Javi lets out a loud sound of disgust.

"Seriously...? You are the perfect life partner for me! I couldn't have asked for anyone better, you're perfect... and I love you very much."

"Fine, you've convinced me enough..." you snort in amusement.

"Can we drop the subject?"

"Sure, Querida" Javi faintly smiles, placing a hand on your stomach then.

"Bullshit aside. How are you feeling?"

"I'm ok... we're both ok" you assure him.

"Sure...?" Javi stares at you with raised brows.

"Positive" you nod with a smile.

"Good" Javi smiles, presses a kiss to your forehead and pulling you into his lap then.

"What do you say, we forget about those assholes and continue enjoying our stay here?"

"Deal..." you broadly smile, nodding in agreement. 

Part 2

tag: @thegreenkid2

#Javi G #javi g x reader #javi g x you #plus size reader #the unbearable weight of massive talent #pedro pascal #javi gutierrez

[rhoorl]

Week in Review | Oct. 8 aka the Week of the Great Gray Sweatpant Revelation

Hi, hope you all are doing well! Another week in the books. When I woke up this morning it was in the high 60’s (F) here in Florida which is basically “grab your sweatshirt” weather for me. I’ve currently got some chili in the slow cooker and I’m channeling all of my fall vibes even though it will be in the 80’s by the afternoon.

Three years ago today we rescued our corgi (for those reading Delta Landscaping, yes I had to throw a corgi into the story because of that). She had a bit of a rough go before us and she still has her moments, but she’s taught me a lot about patience and grace and we have a really special bond. It’s also been so cute to see her bond with my daughter. She was really unsure at first but now they’re super cute together.

I also had quite the Pedro boy week. I started it off with meeting Mando and ended it with Silva and Strange Way of Life (more on that to come).

Fics I read this week:

I have soooo many fics I want to read, and my TBR list is getting out of control. But like, what a great problem to have. I'm continually awed by the passion, creativity, and talent in this fandom.

Frankie Morales

The Pilot and His Girl by @avastrasposts - I can’t believe we’re almost done with this story! I have the lastest chapter on the list to read asap. I’ve loved the ride so far and am so happy to see some of my mutuals on here starting to read it too!

Delta Palms Tropical Resort by @linzels-blog - Loved some Frankie in this latest chapter. Such a competent pilot … sigh ….

Joel Miller

Butter @fuckyeahdindjarin - Sweet, fluffy Joel + a baker. This was a really cute read.

Javier Peña

Every Inch by @javierpena-inatacvest It’s in the It's Never Too Late universe. Javi is as sweet as ever with Osita and is such a supportive partner. (Warning, there’s a reference to green shirt Javi and I about passed out). 😉

Playball by @morallyinept - Gifs are my love language and how I express myself best, so a little drabble inspired by gifs (and Javi gifs at that) had me sold!

Paranoid Heat by @goodwithcheese - I already know I’m going to be obsessed with this. It was a great opening chapter and I’m so hooked. Megan, please don't tell me there are any landscapers in this fic. I don't need another spin off 😂

Marcus Pike

Headshots - Chapter 2 by @secretelephanttattoo - I loved getting a continuation of the story between Marcus and an FBI photographer. Marcus is equal parts menace and sweet, fluffy, great boyfriend.

Dieter Bravo 

Destiny & Deliverance by @mysterious-moonstruck-musings Continues to deliver. This is just such a good fic and I love all of the behind-the-scenes and extras we get for more insight.

Unwind by @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin - This was so cute … you already know I love a fluffy Dieter.

Kinktober and Other Prompts

This is my first time experiencing Kinktober, so I’ve been glued to @absurdthirst feed for new stories.  

My girl @trulybetty also has some great little stories as part of her Autumnal Offerings series. I’ve really enjoyed getting some glimpses at other stories in her universe that I have on my TBR list!

@secretelephanttattoo has some really fun fics dropping like Sofa, so good (Frankie), Stargazing (Frankie), and Kiss Me Quick (Dieter).

Benny Miller / Garret Hedlund

It’s been a while since I had a Benny fic, but @musings-of-a-rose remedied that in spades with The One. It follows Benny and OFC Lily, who just so happens to be Frankie’s 21-year-old daughter. These age gap/dbf stories can be tricky sometimes, but I really thought this one was handled so well. And Benny was sensitive, sweet, funny, and hot. 

Posts from this week:

I hit a big (for me) milestone on here this week and invited some asks and I was not disappointed. I had so much fun with these so if you ever have something, please send me one! To anyone who sent me one this week, I’m thinking up some asks to send your way in return! 😉 I’m not sure if this link will work, but here’s all of the asks I received!

Feral corner:

Gray Sweatpants Update - I am still recovering from the revelation that Young Joel is wearing gray sweatpants in the first episode of TLOU. *deep breaths* Like honestly, the rest of the week aws a blur after that.

You know, I love having friends in all corners of the globe, but sometimes I miss things when I’m asleep. Case in point, this post about … hands. Woof, it was quite the way to start my Sunday.

Things I watched:

I finally saw SWOL and loved every minute of it (although it was over too soon!). I’m not sure if I’ll be able to get back out to the theater for a viewing, but I’m going to get a free trial of Mubi when it comes to streaming so I can see it again. I’m also on the hunt for the Q&A that some saw following their showing so I can get some more insight.

Garrett Hedlund headlined two things I watched this week. I finished Mosaic, which was good. I love mysteries and thrillers. Interesting tidbit about that show: when it first came out, it was released on an app where (as I understand it) you could watch things in any order…like a Mosaic 😉 When it was put on HBO Max it transitioned to a linear format. It was good, but part of me wishes I could have chosen the path for the narrative because I love a choose-your-own-adventure story!

I also watched Desperation Road. It's set in rural Mississippi and is a series of interconnected stories. Some of the subject matter is hard and a bit triggering, but Garrett delivers an absolutely beautiful performance. Seriously, between him and Pedro…they have such expressive eyes.

Things I'm excited for:

Later this week Mr. Rhoorl and I are celebrating our wedding anniversary.  We are doing a behind-the-scenes tour at Universal for three of the Halloween Horror Nights houses and TLOU is one of the houses we are going through! I am so excited and will take as many photos as I can. I’ve been really leaning into the Halloween vibes this year so I will be writing something special later on this month to celebrate the spooky season.

Fic updates:

I got chapters out this week for both fics. I may be a little delayed getting the next installments out, but we'll see!

Thanks as always for reading my ramblings, I hope you have an awesome week!

Working Title (Dieter, series, ongoing) | AO3 

Delta Landscaping (Triple Frontier, series, ongoing) | AO3

Turbulence (Frankie, one-shot) | AO3

#rhoorl week in review #pedro pascal fanfic #dieter bravo x reader #frankie morales fanfiction

[djarinbarnes]

me recordarás - three

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Pairings: Javier Peña x female reader

Rating: Mature - explicit themes

Word count: 3.1k

Summary: summer has come to an end. you find yourself thrown into a whirlwind of emotions, difficult choices and more adversity, like you’d never believed possible. someone is there to pull you out of it - but it’s not someone you’d ever imagined.

a/n: … I'm sorry for the wait on this chapter.  I had no idea what direction I was going to bring this in. I feel like I have a good idea of it now. I hope you don’t hate me for this.

SERIES MASTERLIST

Read it on ao3 here

previous chapter

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Javi doesn’t know how long he’s been waiting. The plane should’ve been taking off at three, and now it’s nearing five. His knee was bouncing, foot unsteady against the tattered carpet of the airport floor. He looked down at his brown leather boots, a stark contrast to the navy carpet littered with purple streaks.

It’s not a secret - not that anyone knows him here, but Javi’s never felt this way before. It’s an unsettling feeling, and it sends chills down his spine. He feels it as a tingle in his fingers, as a twitch in his lip. He’s nervous. Well, nervous was probably not the right word to use in this situation. He was scared.

Javi can’t even remember a time where he actually felt scared before. It was always something else when something was new to him or nagging at his mind. Even that one time where Steve had been kidnapped, he didn’t even feel scared. Not for himself, not for Connie, not even for Steve. He just wondered how in the world Steve could allow such a thing to happen.

Javi wasn’t scared on his own behalf, though. He was scared on your behalf. It was an odd feeling, but it just confirmed his suspicions - he loved you. Not just superficially - he felt it in his nerves, in the tingle of his fingers, in the twitch of his mustache.

He was feeling so many emotions at once, spanning from desperately wanting to protect you to wanting to

There was a time in his life where he didn’t even know if he was capable of loving someone. And yet here he was, getting on a plane to see a woman he loved in another country. Well, his home country, yet a place where he never felt like he belonged.

He did have his history there, of course, spanning from his early days at university and his escapades up until he met Lorraine, who’d actually been interested in him since the first day she met him at uni.

He was two years older than her, and that’s probably why she was so intrigued by him. She heard the stories, of course, yet she looked past everything once Javi finally got eyes for her as well. They dated for a few years before Javi finally fell on one knee, and he could still recollect the feeling he had inside when Lorraine had said yes.

Javi had always felt like he could never impress his parents, even though he managed to get through university with better grades than anticipated, and when he decided that he was going through with becoming a deputy sheriff, his mother had only nodded, while his father had given him a pat on the back.

They were always more excited for his older sister, three years older, and progressively more successful than him. She married a lawyer at 19, they had their first child shortly after. At that time, Javi didn’t even care about fucking with the same girl twice. His sister graduated with flying colors, and made a good career for herself, all while maintaining a healthy family.

Javi hated it. He hated the nagging feeling of jealousy.

He loathed the Thanksgivings, the Christmases and the vacations that turned fewer and fewer over the years. He only showed up at family gatherings because of his niece and nephew. They were a lot easier to impress - and they were genuinely interested in his line of work, to no ones surprise.

His mother fell ill shortly after Christmas 82’, and she died the following spring. Javi knew he had to feel sad - it was awful losing a parent - yet he couldn’t find it within himself to cry. He didn’t cry at her funeral, or when they lowered her casket into the ground.

All Javi did was watch. His sister has simply hugged him, as it was just what he needed. She never judged him like their parents did. Lorraine held his hand as they walked back to their car, the whole drive home and the following days. She let him mourn in his own way, and he loved her for it.

Yes - Javi loved Lorraine like he’d never loved anyone before. But like everything else in Javi’s life, it fell apart. All it took was one snow storm, and Javi had lost Lorraine as well. The timing couldn’t have been any worse, but Javi knew it was coming.

After more than eight years together, a crushed dream of creating a family together and falling out of love, it was over. And Javi knew he had to feel some kind of remorse, yet it didn’t happen. And he finally sought out a new possibility, since he left nothing meaningful behind in America.

That’s how he ended up in Colombia, at the DEA, in Bogota, and ultimately with you. He guesses he should’ve seen it coming - there were always beautiful women wandering around the streets of the warm country, and he’d seen many of them in the ten years he’d been living in the republic.

He recalled your laugh, the way your eyes would search his with no end, trying to find something in the depths of them. He recalled the feeling of your fingers between his as he held your hand, and he caught his gaze looking at the empty space between them now.

Goosebumps rise on his neck as he feels your fingers threading through the short hairs there, the way they would intertwine in the locks as he kissed your lips with ferocity. He remembers how your fingers tightened in the hairs on the crown of his head that first time he’d made love to you.

He sees you in front of him - your expression wonderfully blissed out like the many time he’s watched you as he thrusted into you, and he swears he can feel you clench around him - even though it’s just a mirage. It’s funny how he imagines it, feels it , even though he hadn’t felt it in months.

He swears he hears your moan as well. The sweet sounds of you has lodged themselves in the back of his mind, coming to nag at him at any given moment, if he was the tiniest amount of bored. His fist has never been this occupied, and he loathes it. Loathes that he can’t lay with you, fill you, be close to you.

This kind of romance was simply not what he’d expected when he’d first laid his eyes on you at the bar, on your first night. He hadn’t been with anyone else since you - he simply didn’t want to. He was too caught up in the thought of you, and too caught up in his work. It was weird - it’d been years since he felt this way. He hadn’t felt like this since Lorraine.

Yet, he felt awful, though. He could still hear how your mother had berated him on the phone when she told him of your situation. His heart still sunk deeper into his chest with regret every time he thought of it, thought of how you were feeling.

He felt saddened that he had to hear it from her instead of you - that was what you wanted to tell him face to face. He didn’t even know if you knew that your mother had called him, but he wanted to give you the opportunity to tell him yourself.

He didn’t understand why he hadn’t heard from you since, though. He’d tried calling you countless times, yet he was met with a tone that let him know your line was occupied. It killed him, and it felt like you were actively ignoring him. He wanted nothing more than to get to you. Yet you felt so far away.

He heard the number of his flight being called and with a deep sigh he finally rose from his seat, his ass feeling numb and cold from the firm stool he’d been on/off sitting on for the past three hours. His steps felt heavy, like his feet were casted from concrete, as he walked through the gate and onto the plane that would take him to you.  

He couldn’t wait to get there. To you. Finally.

The fluorescent lights were hurting Eddie’s eyes as he sat in the waiting room. His knees were bouncing, the cup of coffee in his hand turning cold. He hadn’t even drunk from the cup. He was too worried about you.

He had watched the sun rise on the horizon from where he was seated in the waiting room. He always enjoyed watching the sunrise - yet today it was different. He knew everything had changed. Nothing was ever going to be the same, no matter how hard anyone tried.

He knew you wouldn’t be yourself again in the near future. He was mentally preparing himself for the person you might be once you woke up, the underlying possibility that you would be a mere shell of the person you once were.

How does anyone heal from a loss like this? Eddie knew your family was religious, yet he also knew your take on said religion. Eddie knew of your opinion on abortion and healthcare, and that was one of the factors that calmed him of the whole situation.

Yes, this was definitely different. But you’d said it yourself - you didn’t even know if you wanted to keep the baby. Eddie knew you’d wanted to make the choice yourself - this time you just weren’t that lucky. He felt the presence of someone beside him, and he looked to find a white lab coat.

“Is this her first pregnancy?”

Eddie looked fully at the doctor, now sitting beside him, clipboard in hand. He gave the doctor a short nod. “Yes.” Eddie finally manages to get a word out. He barely recognizes his own voice. It’s weak, yet very coarse. His throat feels dry like sandpaper.

“Alright. Has she been bleeding before this incident?” The doctor scribbles down Eddie’s answer as she speaks. He tries to recall every event of their day together, yet he doesn’t remember any blood at all during the day. He certainly wouldn’t have noticed, though, since you’re private about… that stuff .

“No. Not that I know of. Not today.” He remembers your disheveled state when he first knocked on your door a mere 24 hours earlier. He’d expected everything to be as it used to - your cheery personality was the reason he stayed at uni.

Yet there you were - eyes blank and lacking happiness and spark. Skin pale and somehow gray - hair dull and greasy. You looked like you lost a lot of weight as well. He barely recognized you.

“How has she been feeling today?”

“She was all cold and clammy when I came to her apartment around noon. I’ve been unable to get in contact with her, so I went to her place.” Eddie feels a tear trickling out of his eye. “She… Hasn’t been eating. She’s been trying to hide her pain from me, but I noticed.” The doctor nods and scribbles short key points onto the paper on the clipboard.

“How old is she?” The doctor asks and Eddie tells her your age. He looks straight into the paper cup, watching his slightly distorted face in the dark brown liquid.

“Are you the father?”

Eddie feels his breath hitch and his heart drop slightly. If only he was. “No, I’m not.”

“Okay. We’ll make sure to keep you updated. Please, treat yourself to a warm cup of coffee.” The doctor leaves Eddie, and he sighs. He had no idea what to do. Who to call. How to pass the time. If he had his sketchbook, he’d certainly drawn you. You were one of the things that gave him endless inspiration.

If you only knew how many drawings and sketches he’d done of you - your hands, your poses, your profile. You knew of it to some extent - he’d made you pose a few times. He kind of saw you as his muse - even though his feelings for you would never be reciprocated.

Eddie closed his eyes and laid his head back. He could vividly imagine you with a rounded belly. He knew you would be the perfect mother one day - that was just the kind of person you were. Full of love for others, just downright appreciating of everyone and everything.

You would be the perfect picture for him to draw - rounded belly, voluminous brea- no. Shut the fuck up Eddie’s mind. He rubs his eyes before drawing his jacket around his arms, trying to get a few hours of sleep, if his head let him.

“It’s probably nothing. Just a precaution.” You breathe through your nose, trying to calm yourself. Eddie stands beside you, truly hoping for a positive result. It’s all he ever wanted with you.

Those five minutes feel like the longest of his life. The two of you didn’t exactly time those five minutes, you just decided to eyeball it. It was a stupid idea, you realized after… yeah. you had no recollection of how much time had passed. Eddie held your hand as you waited together.

His mind wandered. To the instantaneous cry of a newborn, the soft cooing, the sound of knees and hands scurrying across hardwood floors, to soft footsteps padding along the latter. Eddie feels tears gathering in his eyes.  

You decided to just go with it and turn the test over.

A blazing, red line, next to the control line. Two lines in total. Pregnant.  

He suddenly feels dizzy, and he thanked the iron grip on the counter for keeping him upright. He watches as you stand there, taking in the result on the plastic stick. He watches a thousand thoughts and emotions pass behind your eyes, and he has a hard time reading you.

He watches as you try to breathe. In, out. In, out. In, out. You slowly turn your eyes to his, and he offers you a soft smile. “We’re going to be parents,” he breathes, his heart beating heavily against his ribcage. He wanted nothing more than this, ever since he kissed you for the first time. He’d never been so sure of anything in his life.

He sees your lip wobbling as realization sinks in, and you slide to the floor, settling against the cold tiles. Suddenly, the scenery is different. You’re still on the floor, yet you’re covered in blood. Your hands are stained dark red, just like the tiles beneath you. Your stomach is slightly rounded, yet there’s no trace of a baby.

“I’m sorry.” You breathe before your eyes close and your body slumps together lifelessly.

“Edward?” Eddie is shaken out how his nightmarish slumber gently, the same doctor kneeling right in front of him. “Hi,” The doctor watches as Eddie rubs his eyes, trying to rid the sleep and tears from the corners of them.

“Just Eddie, please.” He says as he sits up and straightens his back. He’s never felt this uncomfortable in his life. Eddie thinks that was his first nightmare. At least the first he can remember.

“She’s in recovery right now. It’ll probably be a few more hours until she wakes up from the anesthesia. I suggest you go home and get some proper sleep.” Eddie nods and watches as the doctor takes her leave. He needs to go back to your place and clean up before you come home.

Coming back to a bloody bed might not be appetizing to sleep in on the first night home. The vision of you crumpled up against the sink on the floor of your bathroom sends shivers down his spine. Eddie decides to walk the four miles back to your apartment to try and clear his head.

He’d forgotten what state the two of you had left your apartment in. When he unlocked your door and pushed it open, he’d expected a bloodbath. That’s how he remembered it. Yet there was a small pool of blood on the bed and a few drops along the floorboards.

The sun was high in the sky, the shadows along your floor short and very visible. The small crystal sun catcher hung by your window casts many, small reflective prismatic rainbow splatters along your walls. Eddie finally sees what you see in it.

It’s beautiful and calming. Just what Eddie needs at that moment. His mind keeps wandering back to the nightmare he had at the hospital. He can’t seem to forget the way you looked, the way you died. It hurts him way more than he thought possible.

Eddie sighs and puts your phone back on the housing, since he’d left it on the table. He grabbed the sheets on your bed and removed them, hoping to rid them of the red stains. Eddie barely notices how much time passes, and he’s startled by your phone ringing.

He decides to pick it up, and he hears your mother’s voice on the other end. “Finally, I’ve been trying to call you for days, you ungrateful brat! If you’d picked up your phone before, you’d know by now that we’re not going to pay for your apartment anymore.”

Eddie is taken aback with the tone and your mothers words, mouth agape and his heart thudding in his chest. He doesn’t manage to get a word out. “You need to be out by September. We’re very disappointed with you. Don’t bother calling us or come home.”  

Eddie drops the phone back to the housing, and sits down on your bed. How the fuck was he going to tell you this? He’d rather not. First everything happening, both this guy in Colombia draining your energy, then the whole baby thing happening and now your parents being complete shitheads in a time of need? Jesus.

September was a mere three weeks away. How the fuck were you ever going to get over this whole situation? He knew that if he were in your shoes, he would be agitated as fuck. Agitated and angry. No, not angry, mad. Mad as hell.

Eddie was agitated on your behalf right now. He felt like he didn’t fit into his own body. Like he wanted to crawl out of it. He heard a few short, hard knocks on your front door, and with the sheets still crumbled up in his arms, he went over to open your door.

To say he was shocked by the man on the other side of the door was an understatement. It’d been years since he’d last seen the man now in front of him. Needless to say, Eddie was speechless. Or, he managed to muster his voice as he breathed;

“Uncle Javi?”

#me recordarás #javier peña #Javier Pena #javier pena imagine #javier peña x reader #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena fic #javier pena smut #javier pena x reader #javier pena x you #narcos fanfic #narcos fanfiction

[green-socks]

In the Most Unexpected Places

Pairing: Robert 'Bob' Floyd x Javy 'Coyote' Machado (aka floychado)

Summary: The unexpected place is Texas. After the mission, Coyote and Bob hadn't thought they'd be seeing each other until after the month long leave they'd been granted. However, finding themselves in the same place (again), they start spending more time together. Just as friends, right?

Words: 3.7k

Warnings: none really.

Notes: I read a couple of hangster fics with Bob/Coyote as a background pairing (most notably Barnes_Brain's Sliding into Home series on ao3) and promptly lost my mind. Needed to make it happen more. Thank you to @wyn-n-tonic for letting me bounce inital ideas and answering my questions that I kept badgering you with from the couch. And thank you to my dear cheerleader @a-reader-and-a-writer for betaing, offering support, and coming up with the title! Couldn't have done it without you bby<3

MASTERLIST

(I know it's Bob's story too but Coyote gets the gif this time, sorry Bobby bby)

"Bob? Is that you??"

Bob whipped around hearing his callsign, not having expected anyone to recognize him in a grocery store in Deer Park, Texas.

"Coyote? Hey, man, wh-what're you doing here?" Bob asked, smiling as the other man pulled him into a quick hug. The greeting was warmer than Bob would have expected, but he was very pleased with it nonetheless. It was good to see Coyote, and perhaps the other man felt the same. It had been less than a week since they had last seen each other on base, but somehow it felt longer, the change of scenery making Bob lose track of time a little bit.

"I should be asking you that! I live here. But I thought you were from somewhere.. not Texas?" Coyote said, scrunching up his face trying to recall if Bob had ever mentioned where he was from.

Bob had not, and now he realized that neither had Coyote, actually. They'd had more important things to focus on in the last three weeks, he supposed.

"Yeah, I'm, uhm, I grew up in Wyoming, but my mom is from here actually. We're here visiting my grandparents for my leave," he explained. "I'm just realizing I never even asked where you were from. I just assumed somewhere in Texas maybe, but at least I know now," Bob chuckled, giving an awkward half-grin that he hoped conveyed that he was sorry for not making more of an effort to get to know the pilot.

"I'm sorry I never asked you either. Guess we never really got there, huh?" Coyote shrugged.

"Robby? Where did you disappear?"

Bob heard his mom calling after him just before she appeared at the end of the aisle behind Coyote's back.

"Robby?" Coyote mouthed at him, and Bob felt himself flush a little.

"Believe it or not, I'm not actually Bob to these people," he smirked to Coyote, before turning to his mom.

"Sorry, Mom, I ran into a friend. This is Javy Machado. Coyote, this is my mom, Michelle," Bob made the introductions.

"Nice to meet you, ma'am. I had no idea Bob had family here, I was surprised to see him just now."

"Oh yes, I grew up here in Deer Park," she smiled warmly at the two. "Machado? I think there was a Machado on my brother's football team in high school," Michelle mused, mostly to herself.

"Could've been my dad, or one of my uncles. They all played." 

"What a fun coincidence that Robby knows someone from here too! Are you in the Navy as well?"

"Yes, ma'am, a pilot. We met just recently."

Bob tried to keep his mom from worrying too much, so he appreciated that Coyote didn't mention their most recent mission in more detail. Bob would talk about his work with his family as best he could, but he knew his mom worried a lot, and he felt better keeping the rougher details of his job from her. Mentioning the mission now would just dig it up again.

"Well, it was nice meeting you, dear," Michelle said to Coyote. "Maybe we'll run into each other again while we're here! Robby, we should run now, your Pop will be waiting."

"Yeah, of course. Uhm, I'll—" Bob turned to Coyote, not really knowing what to say.

"We'll see each other in like twenty minutes in the group chat anyway, right?" Coyote grinned. "Go, man, don't leave your Pop waitin'."

"Right. See ya around!"

"See ya, Robby," Coyote winked.

Bob shook his head, laughing, and turned to hurry after his mom.

-

Coyote was right. They did see each other (figuratively speaking) later that afternoon in the 🗡️SKWAD group chat Fanboy had set up to keep in touch during leave, and they told everyone how they happened to be vacationing in the same place. Most of them were kind of jealous that the two of them could hang out even during leave, what with the codependency already forming within the group, which made Bob realize that maybe he should do something to utilize that possibility.

He'd just never spent time alone together with Coyote, and while there was nothing wrong with the other man, Bob wasn't even sure Coyote (or Hangman, since they were often a package deal) liked him enough to hang out alone with him. Bob knew that the first impressions on all sides had long since faded, but he still didn't know if there was any basis for a deeper connection between him and the pilot, so he didn't make any moves on it.

However, after a couple of days passed, Bob found himself needing the company of someone who knew about the mission to be able to decompress from.. everything. He thought about calling Phoenix again, but then he remembered that he could also hit up Coyote and ask if he wanted to hang out for a bit. Sure, they hadn't really had a longer conversation together outside of the time they were at the hospital with Phoenix after the bird strike incident, but Bob remembered finding Coyote's presence comforting then. He had shut his eyes and just listened to the two pilots talking, and that had helped him ground himself.

Gathering his courage, Bob shot Coyote a message.

Bob: Hey. Would you want to hang out for a bit? Feeling like getting away from the family for a couple of hours.

Coyote: hey man, sure thing. i can come pick you up if you send me the address

And that's how Bob ended up in the passenger seat of the pilot's truck, not really knowing where they were going, but feeling calmer already.

-

Javy looked over at Bob who had his eyes closed. After settling into the car, Bob had asked him if he could turn the radio just a little quieter, and then shut his eyes. Not to sleep, Javy knew, but to recenter himself, it seemed.

"Did you have anything specific in mind?" Javy asked, turning left to drive through quieter roads.

"Nah. Just... If you don't mind, just driving around for a while sounds perfect. I can pay for the gas," Bob responded, eyes still closed, but head turned in Javy's direction.

"You're good, Bob, don't worry about that." Javy glanced at the quiet man next to him again. "Everything okay with your family?"

"Oh, yeah, it's not that. Everything's good with them." Bob opened his eyes finally, and continued speaking, "It's just that the mission is still so fresh, and it's not like I can really talk to them about it all. And you know I like to have my quiet time. With a house full of noisy relatives that's not so easy. I could take a walk or something – that's what I usually do when I need a moment – but…"

"But you needed to see someone who gets it?" Javy guessed. "Yeah, I feel that."

Bob just hummed in agreement.

"If you want to talk about it, you can. I know it was even more intense for you."

"Thanks, Coyote. I appreciate you doing this. Honestly, this is helping a lot already," Bob said, and Javy looked at his face for a sign that the other man was brushing off the issue just to be polite or something. But he only found the honest earnestness that he was used to from the WSO, so Javy let it drop.

Instead, Javy just kept a running commentary of all the places they were driving past, telling Bob random stories about his teenage years, driving the routes he'd been driving back then. His passenger seemed content to just sit there and listen, his face finally relaxing fully.

Javy found himself glancing at Bob often while he drove. The man was a mystery to him. At first glance, Javy thought he'd had the quiet, unassuming man all figured out, but now he knew that not to be true. In fact, it seemed like every day the WSO surprised him in some way. For example, Javy never would have guessed the way Bob dressed in civvies – snug, faded jeans, and equally well-loved band shirts or comfy hoodies seemed to be his go-to outfit. He even wore a hat. Javy hadn't thought of Bob as a hat person for some reason.

It was when Bob started yawning that Javy realized it was getting kind of late, so he made his way back to Bob's grandparents' house to drop him off. They didn't talk much on the way back, but that was okay. It didn't feel like they needed to fill the silence with anything. Coyote was used to more high-energy hangouts with his other friends but found that he didn't mind this either. It was probably good for him too.

When they rolled to a stop at the house, Bob turned to him once more as he was getting out of the truck. "Seriously, thank you for doing this. I know I wasn't much of a company, but this was good for me. Your voice calms me down." Bob added that last bit quietly, as if to himself, and Javy was stunned into silence, watching the WSO walk back inside.

Javy ignored the warm feeling building in his chest and headed back home.

-

The next morning, Bob was surprised to get a text from Coyote, asking him to hang out again. Not that Bob thought Coyote suddenly hated him after last night or anything, but he also didn't feel like he had been the most entertaining companion by a mile.

Coyote: hey again. there's this art museum i've been wanting to check out but my family isn't really into that sort of thing. would you wanna come with me? it's a bit of a drive but if you don't mind. you seem like a guy who would like museums???

Bob: I do like museums. Yeah, I'd be happy to go with you! When do you wanna go?

Coyote: can you be ready to go in an hour? i can pick you up again

Bob: Sounds good👍🏻

-

Once again, Bob hadn't quite known what to expect, but they ended up having a great time at the art museum. They both agreed that it could be difficult sometimes to find a person to go to museums with since some people will go through them too fast and others too slow, the vibes not matching, or just not sharing the same interests. But Bob and Coyote were perfectly matched in their museum behaviors, keeping just the right pace (according to them) and sharing interests in a way where they were often pulled to the same pieces but could also find some individual interests. And they had fun looking through the gift shops too.

"Like Hangman? Love the guy to death, but he does not have the patience for this, if you can believe that," Coyote joked when they were exiting the museum.

Bob laughed. "Yes, I somehow can believe that."

Coyote got quiet for a moment.

"Speaking of him, or us, I don't think I ever apologized to you about how our first meeting went. We were kind of dicks to you that first night," Coyote grimaced.

Bob stopped short and blinked, surprised. "I honestly didn't feel any need for an apology there, but I appreciate it anyway. Besides, I'm kind of used to people dismissing me at first glance, it's just how it is," he shrugged.

Coyote frowned like he wanted to argue something, but Bob continued before he had the chance. "And to be fair, I kind of pegged you and Hangman as like the pretty divas from high school, you know? So it's not like we don't all make some snap judgments sometimes," Bob offered with a small grin.

Coyote looked at him surprised for a moment before a wide smirk split his face. "You think we're pretty, do you?"

Bob rolled his eyes. "Oh come on, you two do not need me to tell you that," he chuckled.

"Eh, well, we like hearing it anyway," Coyote laughed.

(Javy didn't tell Bob that he thought the WSO was quite pretty too, actually.)

-

They found themselves hanging out nearly every day for the next three weeks.

The pair of them visited a few more museums since that was sort of their thing now, but mostly they hung out in the late evenings when their families were already retiring for the night. That way they didn't need to feel bad about ditching the people they got to see far too rarely. They would drive somewhere, grab a snack and eat it on the hood of the truck while parked at some parking lot, a park, or some other quieter place.

But they still found some activities to do as well. They found a fun outside putt-putt course, went to see a couple of late-night movie showings, and had a very fun night at an arcade where a table hockey game got intensely competitive, and Javy showed off his frankly unbelievable skills on a dance mat. Bob dragged Javy to bowling one night, where he got to show off his skills in turn, having done a lot of bowling with his cousin growing up.

Bob did surprise even himself by noticing a want to prioritize hanging out with Javy while also still getting family time. Where did all this social battery come from all of a sudden? Bob couldn't remember ever having this much energy to meet someone even after spending the whole day with family members. He chalked it up to Javy's comforting presence making everything feel easier. There was also the fact that – probably thanks to the circumstances of the dagger mission – there was absolutely zero need to pretend or put on a front between them. They could be candid with each other, which eased Bob's nerves a great deal too. Instead, it was all.. easy.

One evening toward the end of his stay in Texas, Bob heard his Meemaw chattering away excitedly about Robby's new friend to his Pop as they were getting ready for bed. Which promptly made Bob choke on his evening tea, because friend spoken like that was Grandma Speak for boyfriend. Javy had come in for coffee earlier that day, at the insistence of his Meemaw, who was now telling Pop "what a charming, handsome young man that Machado boy was" and how "they looked so sweet together". "No wonder Robby's been spendin' so much time with him. New sweethearts like that can't stand to stay apart," Meemaw sighed.

Bob took a lot after his Pop, both in looks and character, meaning that preferring to stay quiet and letting others talk was his Pop's trademark that Bob had somehow inherited. Which was why it was all the more surprising to hear Pop join in with a grunt, "I agree. He seemed like a smart kid. It's good for Robert."

On the one hand, Bob was glad to hear his grandparents clearly had no issue with him supposedly dating a man, but on the other hand he was still reeling from them even thinking he and Javy were together. That was absurd, right? They were just friends. They acted with each other like they did with all of their other friends, there was nothing special about their situation, right? Meemaw was just being a meemaw again.

Deep down, Bob knew the answer to that, just like he knew how pleased it made him to hear that his family apparently thought he and Javy were a couple. He just wasn't quite ready to admit it to himself yet.

-

"...we are now boarding passengers who require extra assistance as well as any active duty military," came the announcement over the PA, and Bob got up. There was only one other person heading to the gate just ahead of him, and—

"Javy?"

Javy whipped around in a perfect parallel of their first meeting here in Texas almost a month ago.

"I thought you weren't gonna fly back?" Bob asked, wondering if he had somehow summoned the man before him by thinking about him too much all morning (and the night before). It hadn't helped that his Meemaw had been asking him to bring "that lovely friend of yours" for another visit as he had hugged her goodbye.

Before the pilot could answer, the person working the counter interrupted them.

"Since you two gentlemen are our only active duty passengers on this flight, we have upgraded your seats to first class, free of charge, as a thank you for your service," the lady smiled at them, handing them their new boarding passes.

"Oh, uhm, thank you very much, ma'am," Bob stammered.

He never expected (or wanted) any special treatment just because he was Navy, but knew that it would cause only more extra hassle for the workers if he refused the upgrade, so he just thanked them and walked in after Javy. Besides, he couldn't lie that the extra leg room wasn't welcome, even if the flight was only three and a half hours.

He caught up with Javy.

"Yeah, so, I thought you were supposed to have that boys' trip with Hangman and drive back together. What happened?"

Javy snorted. "The fucker went back a few days ago already. Said he had things to do."

"Things like Rooster?" Bob guessed.

"Mmhmm."

Bob snorted too. "Guess that wasn't too surprising."

"Yeah, I don't know why I expected anything else," Javy grumbled, but his voice held a clear fondness for his best friend. "But now I get to travel with you, so it all worked out," he winked.

"Oh, our seats are together," Bob said, in a higher voice than he'd have liked. That was a lot of proximity with a man he only just realized he has feelings for. No big deal. This was fine.

"Not tired of me, are you, Bobby?"

"No! No, not at all! I didn–"

It was then he saw that Javy was smiling mischievously.

"Rude," he harrumphed, blushing, and poked Javy in the chest in retaliation as he moved past the slightly shorter man to sit on the window seat.

Javy snickered as he sat down, and then they fell silent as other passengers started trickling on board.

Bob was feeling slightly panicked. For some reason, now that he had realized he had a crush on the man sitting next to him, it was suddenly hard to know how to act around him. Bob groaned at himself internally. Why did he have to make it difficult now after weeks of easy conversation? A week ago he could just be with Javy, easy as anything, and now all of a sudden he was silently freaking out about the fact that their hands were nearly touching on the armrests. Get a grip, Floyd.

Ever since their late-night discussion about ex-partners two days ago, and Bob had found out that Javy dated men as well as women, it seemed like some sort of dam in his brain had broken. Suddenly he could think of the pilot as a real possibility, and let all sorts of thoughts run free that he had kept buried to the best of his ability thus far. Thoughts that one generally did not have about people one called friends.

Well, if he was being honest with himself, those thoughts had been there for weeks now. He distinctly remembered having a thought or two that day at beach football. (And they called him smart. Bob mentally shook his head at himself). Even so, he had never entertained the thoughts further, and instead kept them very carefully locked up in a box, only escaping when he wasn't concentrating – which he tried to keep to a minimum. But now he found it very nearly impossible to contain them at all.

"You okay there?" Javy asked, his soft voice sounding both a little confused and worried.

Perhaps Bob's internal freakout wasn't as internal as he'd thought.

"'M fine," he croaked, which obviously didn't sound reassuring at all.

"Are you nervous about flying commercial?" Javy tried.

"No, not at all. I'm a backseater, I'm used to not piloting myself," Bob shrugged.

"Oh. Cause I just thought, if you were, I'd have offered to hold your hand."

Sirens screamed in Bob's head as he stared at Javy's hand propped invitingly on the armrest. Too many different possibilities for why the pilot was doing this raced his mind all at once.

"Are- Are you nervous?" was what he settled on.

"Would you hold my hand if I was?"

Javy's expression was carefully blank, and Bob swallowed thickly.

"Of course, if you wanted that," Bob replied.

"Then yes, I'm nervous," Javy nodded. "Awfully nervous," he repeated, nudging Bob's hand with his own.

The sirens in his head screamed even louder. Was this flirting?? Was Javy really flirting with him? Was that what was happening? Why would he want to hold Bob's hand when he obviously wasn't actually nervous?

"O-okay," Bob stuttered, and took Javy's hand in his own. 

It was surprisingly soft despite the calluses from flying a jet. Holding Javy's hand like this felt simply electrifying, and Bob felt himself getting warm all over. He risked a glance at the pilot next to him, and saw that Javy was looking at their joined hands with a small, satisfied smile on his handsome face.

They didn't talk for a long while after that. The flight took off, leveled out, seatbelt signs went off, drinks were served, and all the while they kept holding hands. It seemed that by some unspoken agreement they weren't going to talk about whatever this was on a plane surrounded by people, but instead kept up reassuring squeezes of their joined hands or stroked their thumbs over the other's knuckles. Javy lifting their joined hands to his lips, pressing a kiss to Bob's knuckles at the very least washed away the last of his nerves, replacing them with a pleasant fluttering in his belly. He would demand a proper talk once they landed, but for now his brain calmed down, trusting that he needn't have freaked out over liking Javy after all.

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#bob x coyote #robert bob floyd #javy coyote machado #floychado #top gun fic #top gun: maverick #i still don't know what i'm doing #i accidentally wrote something #top gun brainrot