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shelbgrey · 1 year

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Time In A Bottle(young!Howard Stark X reader)

Paring: young!Howard X Carter!Reader

Summary: after a time machine going wrong a few faces from the past get knocked into our century.

A/N: this is an old story of mine that I posted on Wattpad a while back. It's not edited but I hope you all enjoy.

"can't believe how long it's been since you've been in the ice" I mumbled looking through a magazine that was just published. It was full of articles and pictures of Steve, my aunt peggie, and Howard Stark. I kept flipping through when I stopped on a picture of my aunt.

"you know you kinda look like her" Steve said standing behind the stool I was sitting on and looked over my shoulder looking at the picture of Peggy. I smiled and nodded. I was proud to be a Carter and I didn't hide it like my sister Sharon did. Before I could say anything else there was a loud crash coming for the lab. "what the hell was that?" I asked Tony who was sitting on the couch with pepper.

"you didn't leave anything on did you?" pepper asked. "it's probably just Bruce" Tony mumbled and got up.

"no because Bruce and natasha went on vacation... Remember?" tony stopped in his tracks and looked guilty. He knew exactly what he did he just wasn't ready to admit to what he did. "I'll be back" he said running towards the lab.

"miss. Carter, Mr stark has requested your assistance in the lab" I hear Friday call out from the speakers of the lab. I sighed and threw the magazine onto the coffee table and walked towards the lab. "Tony way do I always have to save your ass" I asked walking into the lab.

When I looked up I saw a treo of people serounding the time machine we've been working on for months. "who's your friends?" I asked crossing my arms. Tony tried to talk but I ignored him looking at three people. One that I recognized made my heart skip a beat.

"aunt Peggy?" I mumbled. She didn't hear me which I was thankful for. No need to add more to the confusion.

"how did you guys get here?" I asked my question was competly ignored and my aunt Peggy started to attack a man who looked like Tony. "Howard you buffoon I told you to not mess with that damed robot again"

"time machine!" Howard correct. "it's a time machine and it obviously worked so I'm a genius" he said with a smirk and crossed his arms over his chest with pride. Now we know where tony gets his ego. "what year is it miss?" the third one asked. He sounded like Jarvis just more human.

"2022" I said crossing my arms. As the three conversed with Tony and I couldn't help but feel a pair of eyes on me I looked over and noticed Howard staring at me. Howard was pretty handsome in his younger years. He looked at lot like Tony but maybe a bit taller. They both seemed to have the same attitude and the same eyes and hair.

I looked at him and raised an eyebrow questioning him. He simply winked and tried to get his two since in the conversation. After a few minutes of arguing we finally came to agreement.

"okay so they'll stay here In till we can figure out how to send them back home" I said walking to the time machine. It looked burnt to the crisp and refused to turn one. I sighed as I picked up a piece that fell off and sat on top of the waist of space.

"(y/n) why don't you show our guests around and show them where the extra rooms are" Tony said before I could escorts them to their destinations Peggy chimed in. "that won't be necessary" she said to me. "I think I can find my way around" she left the lab and literally walked the opposite direction of where she was supposed to go. I crossed my arms and rolled my eyes at the woman I shared blood with. "she's going the wrong way isn't she?" Howard asked clearly reading my expressions right.

"yup" I said turning to him. He flashed me a smirk and looked me up and down. "if the offer of a tour of our new living facilities are still open I would love if you'd show me around" I rolled my eyes at him. He was definitely cocky and very brave you could also tell him and Tony are related. I scoffed "fine" I then started to walk down the hallway as Howard tried to catch up with me.

-----------(1st pov)-----------

I tossed and turned in my bed. Once comfy bed felt like a brick and the room felt like a hundred degrees. Millions of things ran through my head. From the simplest things to more hectic things. My first thoughts were on my aunt and how hard it felt to tell her I was her blood or the fact me and Tony couldn't figure out how to send her back to the right time period.

It also felt wired that I couldn't get Howard out of my head. The man was indeed a charming man much like his son. He also held the same ego and sarcasm but he seemed to know when to hide it unlike Tony.

The man wouldn't leave me alone the rest of the day. He would follow me around the compound like a lost puppy or try to 'help' me in the lab. On the contrary I don't need help in my lab and I felt that he needed to know I don't need a man to help me get my job done. That's why I own my own lab because dispit Tony being my best friend it was always hard to do a job with out him breathing down my neck.

I sighed giving up on sleep and left my room. I quietly walked down the hallway trying not to wake anyone and headed into the kitchen for some tea and maybe a snack. I sighed rumgimg through the cabinets in the dim almost dark room.

"can't sleep either?" I voice said making me jump. I quickly turned around and saw Howard setting at the counter in the middle of the kitchen. He looked just as tired as I felt. His brown hair slightly wet from a shower but in some strainds of hair were fluffy and Stubele peppered his jaw. He was wearing a white t-shirt and blue jeans that Tony possibly gave him. Above all he was handsome I wasn't denying that but in the end I would have to stop myself from getting close to him. For his, mine, and especially Tony's sake.

"no I can't sleep too much on my mind" I sighed setting a crossed from him. He simply smirked and shook his head. "this hole thing is a mystery to me too. I think this is an amazing experience but then I want to get Peggy and Jarvis home where they belong"

"if ony Bruce was home, he's just as smart as you and Tony"

"your pretty intelligent yourself doll" he responded. His brown eyes looked at me and he smirked making me blush.

"me and Tony will try to get you home" I said. "I mean no rush... This time period can't be that bad could it?" he asked.

I titled my head to the side and my straight face broke to a smile. "are you kidding? I would love to live in the 40s"

"why?" he asked with a chuckle. "I Love the history, the music, the cars are my favorite" I smiled.

"you like cars?" he smirked like he was surprised. I slightly nodded and He looked amused.

"what was Steve like back then? I mean before the serum?" I asked breaking the silence.

"much like he is now I'm guessing. I didn't really know him much before he took the serum" he said drinking the last of his coffee. As we fell into comfortable silence I started to feel my eyes get heavy. I rested my elbow on the tabe and my head was supported by my fist. "you look tired.. You should go back to bed..we gotta lot of work to do tomorrow" Howard smiled at me. I only nodded and stood up from the counter. I smiled and padded his shoulder. "get some sleep too Stark" he only nodded.

"good night doll" he called out as I left the room.

------------

The next morning I woke up before anyone else. It was pretty quiet which in my opinion was good. That ment Tony was getting the right amount of sleep he deserves and hopefully the rest of the team was doing the same.

I really didn't feel like working on the time machine before Tony and Howard got up so I just went down to the grauge where all the cars we owned sat. All of them were different in size in color. To Scott's rust bucket of a van to clint and Steve's motorcycles. I like to think my baby out shined them all. My car is back 1967 chivy impala. I worked hard to keep in shape and always made sure I ran to perfection.

I smiled at the black automobile and turned on my CD player. The silver machine flashed one and played Elvis Presley on a low volume. Tony and Clint always called me old school. I didn't use Bluetooth speakers to listen to music and I never saw the reason to by modern cars. I hated New music and new anything. I'm a old soul as steve would say. I loved old movies like Alfred Hitchcock movies or Friday the 13th. I refused to listen to any new music which annoyed Wanda and Peter in some ways.

I digged out the tools I needed and started tinkering under the hood. Things were going through smoothly in till I felt one bolt that wouldn't loosen. I grunted getting aritated and started to pull harder while cussing under my breath.

I then herd the door open and close. I ignored it and continued to work. So after the noises disappeared I felt someone come up behind me. The figure the bigger than mine and I felt his arms reach and grabbed the rinch I had. When I felt his chest against my back I quickly elbowed him. "hay doll I'm only trying to help" it was howard. I rolled my eyes and moved away from the car. "thanks but I got it" I said crossing my arms.

As I turned back around and finished my work on the engine. As I had my back to him I heard him snort and let out a sigh. I quickly wiped around and crossed my arms and Clinched the wrinch I had. "what?"

"nothing" he smiled and moved closer. I stepped back and leaned on my car. "your different from anyone I've ever met"

"oh?" I said not really amused but wanting to know what he meant. "you don't fall at my feet and you stand your ground" he explained. "your kind to me with out trying to be a flert and I really admire how smart you are"

"well... Thanks I think" I slightly blushed and turned back around before he could see. When I leaned over into the car under the hood I saw him move over to the side of the car in the corner of my eye. I sighed as he watched me closely as I worked.

When I went back to the bolt I was struggling with I pushed down as hard as I could and got it lose. But when I did I smashed my had making me hiss and pull back. I grumbled and shook my hand to hit rid of the pain. I squeezed my eyes shut not seeing Howard come up and grabbed my jammed hand in his hand. I opened my eyes and saw him looking down at my hand and rubbing where it hurt. "what are you doing?" I asked stepping back slowly.

"it's bruised let me see" he said taking my hand back and examining my thumb and palm. "im fine really" his chocolate eyes looked up at me making my heart race. My cheeks faded into a pink color and this time he saw it.

"I'm making you nervous, aren't I doll?" he asked kissing my knuckles then Releasing my hand. "n-no you don't" I said trying to stand my ground. I quickly turned around to my car and shut the hood. As soon as the hood shut with a thud I felt him behind me.

"so now your being shy around me?" he asked and kissed my cheek then my jaw. "what happened to your little attitude?" I sighed and turned around facing him. One of his hands fell to my hip and his other went under my chin lifting it up so we made eye contact. "we should see if Tony's up" I whispered.

He leaned in closer brushing his nose to mine. "he's not up yet" his brown eyes stared into my soul as his free hand moved to the back of my neck and pulled me closer. "can I kiss you?"

His question surprised me. I wanted to say yes but when I stared into his brown eyes all I saw was tony. What would he think or react to his best friend kissing a young version of his father. He would always tell me how much he hated Howard and I was always Tony's shoulder to cry on and was always there to listen when he needed to rant about his father.

"I can't" I whispered as I placed my hands on his chest as a single tear left the corner of my eye. "we- I cant do this to tony" he looked at me with hurt and confusion glossing over his eyes. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to over step-" he started but I cut him off.

"I'm sorry... It's not you" I shook my head and left his arms. "I should get to work Tony's probably waiting" I said leaving him alone in the garage.

-----------

"sorry about intrupting your vacation Bruce" I said crossing my arms and looking at him through the screen. "we wouldn't have called you unless it wasn't important" I said.

"don't worry about, sorry I cant be there to help" he responds. "no, you and natasha deserve to get away"

"wait I've got a quick question" Scott said behind me. "what?" me and Bruce said at the same time.

"so if Howard doesn't get back to his normal time period doesn't that mess up Tony's chance of being born?"

"no not necessarily" I said hoping up on my desk and flipping through my notebook of notes we've taken the last month.

"most likely when Howard and Peggy went into the future they made a different time line" Tony chimed in.

"wait, what do you mean?" Peggy asked crossing her arms. I looked over to my aunt and Howard. Howard avoided looking at me which made me upset but that was the least of my problems.

"okay like 5 or so years ago a member of the X-men had to trave into the future to fix something. Now when he did he made two different time lines. The one he was originally from the a different one...kinda like an alternate reality" I explained. "now if Tony's right you being here won't affect the past."

"so ignore everything you learned from back to the future Scott" Bruce committed through my computer.

"what if we don't want to go back?" Howard spoke up. Peggy whipped her head around and glared at him. "and take the chance of messing up the future? Messing up the chance of your son being born?" he said kinda shouting at him.

"aunt Peggy" I started she turned around and looked at me without any of the aggretion she gave Howard. "if you trave to the past or the future, that becomes your future/past and the your future becomes the present. Which now can't be changed by your new future"

"so we could stay here if we wanted?" she asked looking at Steve. He was in the back of the lab trying to stay out of the way. "it's a risk to take, but most likely yes" Tony responded.

"we need to look more into it before you guys make any decisions" I said looking at Peggy then Howard. He immediately looked down and started to fiddle with button on the sleeve of his gray dress shirt.

------------

Another week passed and we got a little bit closer at cracking the codes. Last week we were lucky enough to get Shuri to trave from Wakanda and help us. Me and her worked into the night so Tony and Howard could get sleep and then we got sleep in the early mornings.

"almost done with the coding on this" shuri said taping on one of the hologram screens in the lab. "I'm putting in the last of the wiring now" I respond twisting the red and blue wire together then closing the lid to cover it. Before I could continue with anything else the alarm went off signaling there was a mission.

I sighed and ran off after apologizing to shuri for ditching her. "what do we got?" I asked running into the jet were everyone else was. "just a standard Hydra base, nothing we aren't already use to" steve said.

The mission was longer than we intesapated and a lot of us got engerd especially me but I didn't really care. When we got home I tried to go to bed but Tony and Steve dragged me to the lab were Howard was working with Shuri. "what happened?" he asked as steve picked me up and sat me on Tony's desk. "I'm fine" I mumbled.

"Howard check her enjeries will ya" Steve said walking out of the lab. "I'm fine really" I said as Howard rolled up my sleeve to check the cut on my arm.

"so what happened?" he asked cleaning the cut that was on my forehead. "it was just harder than we expected... More weapons and better sacurity than we thought" I replied and tried to leave but he pushed me back down. "come on Stark"

"you know it's not a bad thing to get help some times" he said kinda irritated. I sighed and let him help. "thanks" I mumbled.

"your welcome" he simply replied and wrapped up my forearm with a bandeges. "I'm only trying to help ya know" he said breaking the silence.

"I know" I mumbled looking down not wanting to face him. He didn't seem to like that so he gently lifted my chin with his fingers. I looked into his brown eyes and felt the familiar feeling. My heart pounded as he leaned in closer than pressed his lips to mine softly. I surprisingly didn't push him away I let it happen. I felt his hands move to both sides of my jaw and pulled me close as he depend the kiss. "Howie.." I said.

He only hummed. "I like that" he said against my lips smirking. He tilted his head to the side for another but placed my hands on his chest stopping him.

"okay I'm sorry" he whispered.

"I'm not, but I can't get attached" I said. "why?" he asked looking scared of rejection. "because we live in two different worlds and time periods.. We have to get you back home" I said tearing up. I moved away and left him but he quickly grabbed my hand before I could get to far.

"you can honestly tell me you feel nothing for me" he spoke.

"yes... I have feelings for you Howard" I said with a whimper.

"then-then what's wrong? Why can't we be together?" he said stepping up closer. "you really want to know why?" I spoke getting frustrated.

"yes! I want to know why" he said shouting. "because I don't trust myself with you" I whispered. I wanted to hug him, kiss him, but I couldn't. The idea of being with someone always seemed to be slim or negative for me. I did care about him but I was scared.

------------

"have you seen my father?" Tony asked coming into the kitchen where I was reading. "how should I know? I'm not his babysitter" I said not looking up from my book.

"well I just noticed how he started following you around like a lost puppy" he said setting down in front of me. I looked up from my book and locked eyes with genius. "what are you implying?"

He tilted his head to the side like he didn't know what I was talking about. He gave me the soft puppy eyes he always gave me when he knew something was wrong. "okay forget my father, are you okay?"

I shook my head and felt the clinch in my chest as I tried to hold back the tears. "me and Howard kiss" I sob and covered my face afraid of his reaction.

"did he kiss you?"

"yes" I responded

"did you kiss back?"

"I'm sorry Tony, I tried to not get close bu-"

"I'm not mad" he said cutting me off. I raised my droppie head and gave him and questioning look. "why aren't you mad? You always told me how much you hated your father, now I'm starting to fall for him"

"it's okay" he whispered then wrapped his arms around me. "he just better not hurt you"

"it doesn't matter" I spoke pulling away from his arms. "once we get the time machine to work he's going back home.. It would have never worked between us"

"I'm sorry (n/n)" he wrapped his arms around me again and rested my head on his shoulder. "we'll figure this out okay?"

"okay" I mumbled.

----------(Howard's pov)----------

"okay let's start it up" Tony shouts. The machine that's supposed to take us home fired up. I stood there not really wanting to leave and I could tell Peggy didn't want to leave either.

I watched the time machine glow and slightly shake signaling us it was time to leave. I sighed feeling bad that I didn't tell (y/n) goodbye. She was probably the first woman a genuinely loved and was more than a fling or lust. She was smart and sarcastic and didn't fall to my feet when first met her. She made me work for her affection and attention which I actually liked and I worked hard for it.

The times she pushed me away only told me she cared more about other people's happiness than her own. She had a heart of gold and I admired that. She pushed me away because she was afraid of hurting Tony.

"wait" Peggy's voice said grabbing my arm. I looked at her kinda sad and stood in my place. "do you love her?"

I tilted my head to the side trying to play dumb. "don't you look at me like that, you know what I'm thinking about" she said.

I dropped my head and sighed. "I do" i shook my head and started fiddling with the insides of the pockets of my jeans. "than go to her" she said crossing her arms. "stay here and be happy"

"what if effects something? What if I screw up the time line?" I asked pacing back and forth.

"you won't" Tony butted in. "I've talked to Bruce and Strange, and they both said you can't mess it up" I looked down not wanting to look at the man that would be my son in the future. "look she loves you so just stay with her" he said with a sigh. He had the look of someone being forced to say something they didn't.

"I don'-" I started. "go!" Jarvis and Peggy both said at the same time cutting me off.

I nodded and ran out of the room than down the hallway looking for her. I frantically looked around and found a lot of dead ends before I found her in one of the labs. "hay" I said casually.

She quickly looked at me with big dough eyes. "aren't you supposed to be back in the 40's now?"

"I've come to a conclusion" I said walking up to her. "and what is that?" she said crossing her arms. "I'm staying here"

She stared at me with shock painted all over her face. "why would you? What dose this time period have to offer really?"

"you" I said truthfully and stepped up closer maybe only leaving five inches between us. "I want to stay here with you"

I placed my hand on her cheek and slowly leaned in connecting my lips to hers. I felt her arms slowly wrap around my neck and deepen the kiss.

"I love you" I whispered against her lips.

She slowly pulled away and smirked. "I know" I playfully rolled my eyes knowing she was joking. I kissed her forehead and smiled. "your gonna have to teach me about modern time though"

"oh that should be tons of fun" she chuckled than wrapped her small arms around my waist.

"is Peggy staying too?" her small voice spoke making me sighed. She's going back for me, for us. She was on of my closest friends and she's giving up the opportunity to be with steve just so I could be with (y/n). She told me of one of us stays someone needs to be on the 40's keeping it safe. She also told me to keep her safe because (y/n) was her niece. Even though the the two just met you could tell how much Peggy loved her. "she's going back so I could stay with you"

"she also told me to take care of you and if I break your heart she'll come back and kick my ass" I said trying to make her smile. She sadly smiled and looked up at me with her (e/c) eyes.

Everything happens for a reason. I was supposed to screw up with the time machine so it would take us into the future. I like to think I was supposed to find (y/n) and maybe I was supposed to make myself a better father to tony. What ever it supposed to be its definitely a second chance and I'm grateful for that.

#Howard Stark #Howard Stark X reader #Howard Stark imagibes #agent carter #Dominac Cooper #Marvel imagines #Mcu #Mcu x reader #Peggie Carter x reader #Peggie Carter imagines #Steve Rogers x reader #Steve Rogers imagines #Tony stark x reader #Tony stark imagines #Bruce banner x reader #Bruce banner imagines #Jarvis

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bigskydreaming · 2 years

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@destefaniart Yup, “In Their Shadows Grow Trees of Good and Evil” is definitely Court of Owls related. Its literally just using that series’ AU setting and family dynamics with the premise:

What if the Batfam found out about the Court’s existence and plans for Dick before the Court ever tried to make a move on him, based purely on fifteen year olds Jason and Cass watching Court members be skeevy around their older brother at galas and being like...mmm, don’t love whatever’s going on over there. I sense Evil afoot.

(The following is just some off-the-cuff dialogue along those lines, but not actually likely to be the actual dialogue I go with because the character voices aren’t quite what I’m aiming for Jason and Cass to actually sound like in this. I’m mostly just being goofy for the LULZ at the moment. But like. You get the gist).

Jason: I do not care for their vibes, sister.

Cass: Samesies.

Jason *spluttering*: Samesies? SAMESIES? Did you not hear the intonations I put in that? The gravitas? You couldn’t just like....match my energy, nooooo, you had to go and fucking derail by being like ‘ha ha, samesies, tee-hee’ which by the way, is something I have literally NEVER heard out of your mouth before now and I somehow doubt I will ever hear you say again...ugh. God, would it KILL you to just follow my lead for once?

Cass, regarding her dramatic-ass brother with all the gravitas he wanted before: Yes. I could die. Would you like that? Do you want me to die?

Jason: ....what?

Cass: I see. I would literally die for you. For our brother. But me? I can die. You’d be fine. Ideal, even. Good to know.

Jason: What is happening right now.

Cass: Learning I love you more than you love me. Its fine. Why? What’s up with you?

Jason: Why are you like this?

Cass *shrugs and stares deeply into her flute glass of sparkling apple cider as though its a scrying pool that contains the answer to his question, which is now suddenly the most important question to ever be asked and/or contemplated*: My parents are bad people. That could be it.

Jason snorts, the mood broken: Oh please. My dad’s an ambulatory piece of shit with just enough of a credit history to trick society into thinking he came out of a womb instead of a public toilet. You ain’t special.

Cass *shrugs*: Knew it wasn’t going to land. Figured I’d commit anyway.

*both pause to soak in the sudden uncomfortableness*

Jason: Right! So! How do you want to play this? Should we just skip straight past the awkwardness to an abrupt subject change and pretend neither of us ever dropped the dreaded ‘p’ word? Or we could do the whole ‘mine are worse’ ‘no mine are worse’ thing until we make a scene that ends with Dick assuring us its not a competition and we can both have shitty parents while getting that weird pinched expression where its like he can’t decide whether he wants to apologize for having good parents or like, pat us on the head for having terrible ones? That’s always fun.

Cass, nodding thoughtfully: I do enjoy that. I shouldn’t. But I do.

Jason, bumping her shoulder with his: Eh, don’t feel too bad. He gets the same look when Bruce burns toast and Dick can’t decide if he wants to roast B for it or apologize for being a functioning adult who can safely use a toaster without having the fire department on standby just in case.

Cass: Also very funny.

Jason: Exactly. Sides, its not like its your fault. I mean, how do we know you finding that funny ISN’T because your parents are shitty people?

Cass, eyeing him with the dubious air of someone who WANTS to believe, but is well acquainted with her brother’s brand of bullshit: I laugh when our brother gets the awkward look where he doesn’t know whether something’s just sad or something he should feel bad for.....because my mother kills people for money.

Jason, spreading his arms as if points were actually just made: Can you prove there’s for sure NOT a connection there?

Cass: People are right. You do use that too much.

Jason, who has never backed down in his life and for damn sure isn’t about to start right now: And you know who’s fault that probably is?

Cass, with eyebrow raised: Your dad’s?

Jason, triumphant: EXACTLY. Its not my fault the math all checks out.

Cass: Right. Its math.

Jason: Yup. Can’t argue with math. The only empirical truth of the universe. I mean, could you imagine if you tried to say math led you astray? Bruce might actually cry.

Cass: Are you done?

Jason, pausing to consider. Yeah, I can be done.

Cass takes a deliberate chug of her drink, eyes watching her brother the whole time as if just waiting for him to reverse course and pick right back up.

Jason: Hey wait a second. People say I use that too much? What people?

Cass *shrugs*: People.

Jason: Well what people are talking about me? Are they talking about me TO you? What do they say? Are you defending me at least?

Cass, after a pause: Sorry. I lied. No people were talking. Definitely not about you.

Jason, narrowing his eyes: Why don’t I believe that?

Cass shrugs: Because I just told you I lied?

Jason: Ugh, no, not about that, I don’t believe you about lying.

Cass squints: I lied about lying?

Jason: Yes. That.

Cass: That’s weird. Why would I do that?

Jason: I DON’T KNOW.

Cass: Well if you don’t know how should I know?

Jason: You’re doing that thing again.

Cass: Now you’re lying. I never do things. I’m a thinker, not a doer. My therapist even said so.

Jason, rolling his eyes: That’s because you’re a demented little chaos monster who pathologically lies to your therapist just so you can giggle at Bruce’s face every time she comes back with increasingly niche diagnoses for stuff you read about on WebMD.

Cass: Bruce said I needed more hobbies!

Jason: Yes, and manipulating your therapist into basing an entirely absurd and completely off-base CASE STUDY on you is what he meant.

Cass, the unrepentant: He should have been more specific.

Jason: She’s going to publish only to be completely discredited and then laughed right out of her tenure isn’t she.

Cass, shrugging: I don’t know how tenure works.

Jason, eyeing her sternly: Don’t you think that a) there’s a chance this might have gotten a LITTLE out of hand, and b) you should be at least a LITTLE concerned that I of all people think this is a bad idea?

Cass: Why do you get to be the only one with bad ideas? My parents are bad people too! Math!

Jason: Eww, stop making me see the error of my own ways! I’m too young to repent!

Cass, rolling her eyes now: I’m only doing it because she’s a terrible person who shouldn’t be allowed to work with children who can’t tell when she’s being secretly judgy while saying things that would make them feel bad if they couldn’t tell she doesn’t really care about helping them like I can.

Jason: So you’re saying.....this is all just because she’s actually a danger to the people she’s supposed to be helping, and you’re only doing it for the greater good.

Cass: Mostly for the greater good.

Jason: Cass!

Cass: Its not my fault its still funny!

Jason groans. He’s so not cut out to be the responsible sibling. It feels gross. How does Dick do it all the time.

Cass, exasperated: Jason. She thinks I have an imaginary friend.

Jason: What? Why the fuck does she think that?

Cass blinks: I told her I did.

Jason groans again.

Cass: She didn’t have to believe me!

Jason: Why didn’t you just tell Bruce the real reason you don’t like her and let him deal with this?

Cass, hotly: I’m not a QUITTER.

Jason: You get how absurd you’re being right now right? This is ME. Judging YOU. For YOU being the absurd one here!

Cass: Your last therapist was convinced you were a pyromaniac!

Jason jabs a finger at her: Hey! That is NOT the same! ONE time, I said ‘fire pretty’ as a JOKE, and he just leaped to conclusions!

Cass: You started a fire. In your room. That same night.

Jason: That was an ACCIDENT!

Cass crosses her arms. Judgmentally.

Jason: He was being RIDICULOUS and it was totally ridiculous that Bruce just like, BELIEVED him because like ‘he’s a professional Jason, he knows how to do his job,’ as though the fact that I can literally LIE TO HIS FACE about secretly being fucking ROBIN in session after session wasn’t kinda a big red flag that maybe the dude’s not that GOOD at his job, y’know? But you show B enough diplomas on a wall and he’s like ah excellent, an expert, like people don’t BUY their way through school all the fucking time and I was just TRYING to make Bruce see how ridiculous it was to think this guy had ANY clue what he was talking about by being like hey, look at all the super flammable and incendiary stuff I have just readily available throughout my room, and yet surprise! No fire! Could a pyromaniac do that?!

Cass: And then a fire started.

Jason: Yes, obviously, but only on ACCIDENT.

Cass: From all the super-flammable and incendiary stuff you accidentally had in your room TO start fires.

Jason: Okay, see, I feel like you’re not getting it.

Cass: That is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.

Jason: Oh great, now I’m getting judged by Miss Watch Me Gaslight My Therapist Into Losing Her Job By Writing About How Not Normal I Am, With This Of Course Being a TOTALLY NORMAL THING TO DO

Cass glares at him. Jason glares at her.

Cass: This is why Bruce is so sure we need therapy, isn’t it.

Jason: Can we agree that he can never know that we’ve come to understand why he’s concerned, and that making us go might not actually be the worst thing he’s ever done to us?

Cass: Obviously.

Jason: Great. Now to distance ourselves from this uncomfortable self-awareness as quickly as we possibly can, let’s jump tracks: where did we land on those creepers talking to Dick and how we feel about their vibes?

Cass: The vibes are rancid.

Jason: Awesome, we’re still on the same page. And this leads us to conclude that the owners of the rancid vibes give Major Skeeve and we do not like and or trust them or their skeeviness right?

Cass: Duh.

Jason: So in conclusion, rancid vibes, skeevy dudes, probable evil afoot. At the very least, insidiousness. We should definitely investigate further.

Cass: Yes. There will probably need to be punching.

Jason: Any particular reason, or because you just want to punch them?

Cass: *hesitates* Sure.

Jason: I am so uncomfortable with this inverted dynamic wherein I am the voice of reason and also moderation. Are we done yet? Is opposite day over?

Cass, rolling her eyes: Fine. Minimal punching. And I won’t even enjoy it even if they are evil and my parents are still bad people and math said it was okay.

Jason: See? There we go. And Bruce thinks we need therapy. Hah!

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elvesandlanterns · 1 year

Text

DC-Verse Theater part 3

“Alrighty next clip is a sibling universe of this universe so again most things are the same as yours with some slight differences.”

Damian’s eyes narrowed as he tried to spy on her phone with Jon in between them, “What kind of differences.”

“Well in this universe Jason and Bruce manage to talk some things out. A more glaring difference is that this Jason is a scientist.”

“Woah, really Jason?”

The man in question smacked the archers shoulder playfully, “Hey what that’s supposed to mean! I’m smart!”

“Yup Jason in this universe practically lives in space!”

The video started to play, “Oh also in this universe Konner doesn’t exist.”

“Wait what!” Tim was horrified, Konner nodded it made sense they couldn’t all exist every time… especially when they weren’t even born in the first place.

The scene opened on Jason and Tim in Jasons apartment kitchen. It was kinda creepy how the apartment looked exactly the same, until they kept walking. Leading them both into a room that looked like Roy’s workshop, me mechanical garbage thrown everywhere.

“I am wiped out guess I’ll turn in.”

Cass raised an eyebrow, usually they had to fight for Tim to sleep.

“Cool.”

Jason looked at the screen, huh looks like him and replacement had a good relationship here. He felt bitter about it, not that he deserved a good relationship with the replacement.

“Jay, I feel like I’ve spent my whole life pretending Bruce is a great guy and trying to be like him and the ugly truth has always been-“

Tim didn’t like were this was going, but at least him and Jason were close. Close enough for Tim to tell him things like this, real brothers.

“That he’s not that great a guy and you are exactly like him?”

“Am I evil?”

Bruce felt like his nerves were on fire, he knew he wasn’t a good man but Tim?

Damian scoffed, “As if you have the capacity to ever be Batman.”

“Actually Tim is the most like me.”

The room grew silent, as Tim hunched his shoulders. He never wanted to be Batman in the first place.

“Worse you’re smart. When you know nothing matters the universe is yours and I have never met a universe that was into it.

It was Hals turn to raise an eyebrow, “That kinda sounds like he drops into different dimensions a lot.”

Chimera smiled, “Oo! Got it in one! And people saw your the dumb one.”

The universe is basically an animal that grazes on the ordinary creates infinite idiots just to eat them not unlike your husband Brecard -“

“Bernard”

“Yeah hardly matters now sweetie.”

“I MARRIED Bernard !!!”

Konner could admit to being a little itty bit jealous.

“Jay I’m out of excuses to not be who I am … so who am I ? What do I do?”

“You’re asking Jason for advice?- ow”

“I’m asking Jason for advice? I guess we’re close …” it felt nice to know there was one world out there where his Robin liked him.

“My advice? Take off, leave Gotham before it eats you.”

“Jason!”

“What Dick! It’s not like any of you would even notice if he left and it’s obvious that this Tim isn’t happy to be there.”

“I can’t do that! The titans, Dick, my job and as much as I hate to admit it ABCs the Bachelor- “

Dick couldn’t help but feel vindicated, of course Tim wouldn’t leave. “I Knew it I knew you liked the Bachelor! We should have a movie night Tim-“

“Oh maybe Dick, I’m pretty busy.”

“Oh okay no worries Timmy.”

“I can make a clone of you.

Konner couldn’t breath.

A perfect instance of you with all of your memories an exact copy in every way. It will love and provide for the family, do your job and consume broadcast network reality tv on the same alleged ironic level you do. You could be gone a day, a week of the rest of your life with zero consequences. The moment you decide to come back I flip a switch and the clones job is done. It feels no pain, it regrets nothing, it has zero chance of going BladeRunner.”

“Konner-“

“I’m fine.” And he was he didn’t need Superman’s pity, he didn’t want it. He didn’t get to do that, he had made his choice.

“If nothing matters, why would you do that for me?”

Jason rede used to ever admit it but he actually did like replac- Tim. He liked Tim, but after everything Jason didn’t have any room left to stand on with the kid. And he had done it to himself.

“I dunno maybe you matter so little that I like you. Or maybe it makes you matter. Maybe I love you. Maybe something about the Pits. Don’t jump a gift shark in the mouth.”

Bruce took note of Pits being mentioned, at the very least maybe these videos could help him figure something’s out. They might even give him information on how to help Jason.

“I don’t know if I can do it.”

Divk smiled of course not, this was Tim. His little brother wouldn’t just leave. Not like that, he couldn’t lose a brother like that. Even if Tim was cloned he’d notice! He’s know Tim since he was eight!

“Then stay and luxuriate in a life that you can finally know you’ve chosen.

Damian scoffed, ‘chosen’ of course Drake was the only one to get a choice. Everyone else had been dragged into the Batfamily, but Drake? Drake just waltzed in like it was nothing.

My secret bonus is no matter what you choose you’re finally gonna chill the fuck out.”

Jason laughed, “Yeah Timborine fucking chill out with your identity crisis and pick a lane.”

“Okay I know what I wanna do.”

“Tim…?” Stephanie would like to believe that Tim wouldn’t but… after everything Tim had changed.

Tim folded into Konner.

Note: this is from Rick and Morty

youtube

#batman #justice league #dc multiverse #DC-Verse Theater #Batman x Rick and Morty #Youtube

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out-of-context-batfam · 4 years

Text

The Batman’s Grave #11

#YUP THAT SOUNDS EXACTLY LIKE WHAT BRUCE WOULD DO #HES GONNA MAKE A BIG SHOW AND OVERCOMPENSATE HEAVILY PROVING HE COULDVE ENDED THIS SOONER BUT DIDNT #ALFRED PENNYWORTH KNEW THIS BUT HE JUST WANTED BRUCE TO ADMIT IT OUTLOUD #BRUCE COULDVE ENDED THE FIGHT THIS ISSUE BUT HE INSISTED ON USING HIS FISTS TO FIGHT THE BAD GUY AND LOST #dc comics #batfam #batfamily #out of context #the Batman’s grave #batman #bruce wayne #Alfred pennyworth #funny #dammit bruce #could have done that earlier #he likes to overcompensate #he admitted that very reluctantly

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hintofelation99 · 3 years

Text

Bruce, handing Jason a present: Happy birthday Jaylad, I’m so glad you decided to spend this one with the family.

Jason, opening his present: Thanks B, it’s nice to- what is this?

Bruce: It’s a new bag, now you can get rid of the old one.

Jason: My old duffel bag is in perfect condition, why would I get rid of it?

Bruce: Well, I wouldn’t say it’s in perfect condition. It has some pretty bad stains…

Jason: Alfred got most of those out for me. You know that.

Bruce: Well, it- I just- for the love of god Jason you kept drug dealers heads in that bag!

Jason: Exactly, that just proves it’s a sturdy bag!

Bruce: But the bloodstains!

Jason: Are mostly gone!

Bruce: Just throw out the bag Jason!

Jason: No! It’s sentimental!

Bruce: It’s senti- what the fuck Jason?!

Jason: I’ve had that bag since I was a kid, since before you took me off the streets…

Bruce: Oh, Jason I’m sorry I didn’t-

Jason: Nah I’m just kidding I got it at Walmart after I cut off the first drug lords head and realized I had no where to put it.

Bruce:

Jason: Still not throwing it out.

———

Dick: Happy birthday Little Wing! I’m so glad you’re back and celebrating with us, I really went all out on your present this year.

Dick passes Jason a large box.

Jason: Thanks Dickface, I’m happy to-

Dick absolutely giddy.

Jason: Dick, is this my headstone?

Dick: Yes.

Jason: Did you steal my headstone?

Dick: Yes.

Jason: Did you really steal my headstone, wrap it up, and give it to me for my birthday?

Dick: Yes.

Jason: And you thought this was a good idea?

Dick: Yes.

Jason: …

Dick: So, do you like it? Or do you love it?

Jason looks at the headstone, face blank.

Jason: Dick, I- this- this is the best fucking present you ever got me, let’s go hang it!

———

Jason: So, Timmy…

Tim, on the bat computer not paying attention to Jason: What.

Jason: Y’know it’s my birthday, right?

Tim: Of course I do, why else would I be wearing all black.

Jason: Okay, hardy har har, a super boy t-shirt and black sweatpants don’t count as a mourning outfit.

Tim: Keep telling yourself that.

Jason rolls his eyes leans on Tim’s chair. He proceeds to subtly try to annoy Tim.

Tim: What? Did you come here just to annoy me or did you want something?

Jason: Well, now that you ask… what’d you get me for my birthday?

Tim: Nothing.

Jason, looking unimpressed: Really? You got me nothing?

Tim: Yup. Nothing.

Dick walks into the cave looking at some papers, not paying attention.

Dick: Wow Tim, nice job with that new community center! I still can't believe you were able to buy Jason's old apartment complex before they demolished it.

Dick looks up: Oh, hi Jason! Have you visited the Catherine Todd Community Center yet?

Jason turns to Tim who's basically glowing red. Tim tries not to make eye contact.

Jason: Did you turn my old apartment into a community center?!

Tim: No.

Jason: You fucking liar! How did you do that without me noticing?

Tim, whispering clearly embarassed about how much effort he put into Jason's birthday: You were off planet... and I was, uh, bored?

Jason: You are such a little liar you shithead, god fucking dammit Tim!

Tim: I'm sorry okay!

Jason: Why the fuck are you apologizing?! This is the best present ever you asshole!

Tim: Then why do you sound mad?!?!

Jason: IT'S CALLED BEING AGGRESSIVELY HAPPY ASSHOLE! Fuck, you suck... and I love you... you're a good brother... asshole.

Tim: It wasn't just me, Cass helped.

Dick: Cass has been coordinating the after school events, she's surprisingly good at it. Honestly it could be a future career path.

Cass: Maybe.

Everyone jumps.

Jason: Holy shit, when did you get here?!

Cass: Been here.

Cass passes Jason a brochure for the Catherine Todd Community Center.

Cass: Happy birthday!

———

Damian: Todd. I am told that it is tradition to give family members birthday presents. Here is yours.

Damian immediately leaves.

Jason, looking at the box and reading the letter aloud: 'For the next time'?

Jason opens the box.

Jason: YOU GOT ME A SHOVEL YOU ASSHOLE?!?!

———

Duke, passes Jason an envelope: Hey Jay, happy birthday!

Jason, slowly opening the envelope: Thanks Duke.

Jason looks at the two slips of paper and smiles.

Jason: Wait, what? Are these?

Duke: Two tickets to hear Margaret Atwood speak, I thought it might be fun together. I mean- uh, unless you don't want to- you can take Roy or some one else. I know we're technically brothers, but like-

Jason: Shut up Dukie-

Duke: Did you just call me Dookie-

Jason: Shhh, shut up, there's no technically about it. We're brothers and we're gonna go to this talk together and bond and shit.

Duke smiles: Oh, okay, cool.

———

Steph throws a book at Jason's head: Happy birthday asshole.

Jason, looks at it slightly confused: Wait, did you get me a fucking coupon book?

Steph: Yup, I'm not adopted, I don't get that good good Wayne allowance.

Jason, looks at it for a second then shrugs: Fair, wanna go to Olive Garden? I have a buy one get one entree?

Steph: Hell yeah.

———

Babs tosses a bag at Jason, and tries not to smile: Happy birthday.

Jason, pulls a hoodie out of the bag: What the fuck?

Turns the hoodie around to reveal a sweatshirt that says "Red-arse 4ever" With a giant heart.

Babs, trying not to laugh: Do you like it?

Jason glaring at her: I hate you.

Babs: Try it on!

Jason: Fuck you I'm not-

Roy walks in and sees the hoodie.

Roy: Babe! I love it!!

Babs starts crying laughing.

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nightwingvixen23 · 2 years

Text

Bruce : happy birthday, son

Damian : *blows out his candles*

Alfred : *flicking the dining room lights back on*

Stephanie : I GET THE FIRST SLICE

Dick : excuse you but this is Damian's birthday; and he will be getting the first slice

Stephanie : how's that even fair when Jason already has his face stuffed ??

Jason : *shoving another forkful of cake into his mouth*

Dick : JASON ! you were supposed to WAIT ! Dami was supposed to have his piece first !!

Jason : *around his mouthful of cake* oh shit, you right

Jason : *turning to Damian*

Jason : here ya go kiddo. lucky for you, I didn't swallow

Damian : *disgusted*

Tim : didn't swallow ? damn. that's the first time I've ever heard that about you

Damian : *horrified*

Jason : and how in the hell would you even know

Tim : lets just say that Roy likes to brag

Stephanie : what I don't get is why he feels like he's even gotta tell us that he's been railing Jason. I mean, haven't we all overheard that poor bed up in his room fighting for it's life each time Roy stays over ??

Jason : you're all a bunch'a little pervs

Tim : not our fault that you have no volume control

Stephanie : you know exactly just how loud you're always being...in fact, I'm kinda startin to think you're that loud on purpose

Tim : yeah. you want us to know what's goin down up there--

Bruce : --alright that's enough

Dick : yeah you guys, just look at what you've done to the poor birthday boy

Damian : *staring blankly at the wall*

Dick : you've traumatized the poor thing !!

Tim : i doubt he's as traumatized as we are from having to carry around an internal audio file titled Jason's Amazing Slut Time Adventures--

Jason : *tossing his fork aside*

Bruce : *stepping between Jay and Timmers before they can throw hands*

Bruce : it's time we change the topic of conversation

Stephanie : okay, here's a new topic of conversation; what's a bad bitch gotta do to get some cake around here ???

Bruce : please watch your language

Jason : why should we ?? It's not like Damian needs censorship anymore. he's a certifiable adult now ! ain't that right Mister One Eight ??

Jason : *nudging Dami playfully*

Damian : *still spaced the hell out*

Dick : I just can't believe how fast you've grown up !! my little Baby Bat !!

Dick : *smothering Damian to his chest*

Dick : *sniffles emotionally* it seems like it was only yesterday night that you were standing over us with your sword raised while we slept just to slowly creep back out of the room once we'd wake up in shock 😭

Jason : yo. . . .that was yesterday night

Tim : and the night before yesterday night

Dick : *finally letting Dami breathe*

Stephanie : so now that you are 18, the audience wants to know, do you have any big plans from this day forward, short-stack ??

Jason : way to sound cliche as fuck

Stephanie : but I for real wanna know ! c'mon and enlighten us Damian. what are you doing with your life ?

Damian :

Damian : I'm genuinely just here for a laugh

Jason : yup *digging into his 3rd slice of cake* sounds about right

#birthday boy Dami #a big clusterfuck of nonsense #batfam #jayroy #jason todd #red hood #dick grayson #nightwing #tim drake #red robin #damian wayne #robin #spoiler #batman #stephanie brown #bruce wayne #alfred pennyworth

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forevermore-quoth-the-kitten · 2 years

Text

The Bats as Jeff Dunham Arguments

Bruce: look, kids, i have a surprise for you.

Jason: *gasps* you’re going in the closet?

Bruce: h- no, and the phrase is ‘coming out of the closet’.

Dick: *gasps* congratulations!”

Bruce: no I’m not coming out of the closet.

Steph: you’re going to continue to hide the truth?

Bruce, getting annoyed: I’m not hiding anything.

Dick: So everyone knows now? congratulations!

Bruce, gestureing to Selina, who waves: I have a girlfriend!

Tim: *gasps* does she knooww? Maybe she will like this one guy!

Bruce: there is no one guy!

Jason: then there are many guys?!

Damian: who are a whoorreee.

Bruce: no-

Damian: you should be stoonneeeddd.

Bruce: Damian-

Tim, offended on behalf of the laughing ghost of Martha Wayne: what would your mother say?!

Bruce, resisting the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose: I’m not a whore.

Steph: of course your mother would say she’s not a whore!

Bruce: I’m straight.

Jason: straight, crooked, we do not need to know such graphic details!

Bruce: i mean i have a girlfriend. *Selina’s still behind him trying not to laugh*

Dick: not for loonnngggg. not when she finds out about your many boyfriends.

Damian: whooorreee.

Bruce, no longer able to resist the urge: will you please listen to me.

Jason: i do not talk to whores. you are dead to me.

Bruce, suddenly smirking: you’re dead to all of us.

Jason, shocked and pissed: *jaw dropped*

everyone else in the room: *laughing*

Bruce: can we see him?

Jason, taking his chance and pretending he wasn’t talking about his boyfriend: you see him every day.

Bruce: what?

Dick, voice raised: He said, you see him every day!

Bruce: I heard him.

Steph: then why did you say what?

Bruce: what?

Duke, getting in on it: he said, why did you say what?

Bruce: why are you yelling?

Tim: because you keep saying what!

Damian: apparently he cannot hear us.

Jason: he’s getting old.

Bruce: what?

Jason: see!

Cass: he said ‘what’ again.

Dick: it’s downhill after 50.

Damian: he’s been farting more now too.

Steph, nodding: i know, old guys do that.

Bruce, raising his voice now: excuse me.

Cass, hiding a grin: i think he farted again.

Duke: at least he’s polite.

Bruce: guys!

Dick: yes Bruce?

Tim: It’s ok to get old Bruce!

Steph: it happens to everyone!

Jason: unless you die first.

Bruce: my hearing is fine!

Duke: then why are you yelling?

Bruce: i don’t know.

Jason, meeting all of the other kids gazes: he’s confused.

Bruce: no I’m not.

Dick: and in denial!

Bruce: what are you talking about?

Tim: and he’s senile.

Steph: yup.

Cass, patting a very annoyed Bruce’s shoulder: its ok.

Bruce: excuse me!

Dick: why? did you fart again?

Bruce: No

Duke: so it was just the once?

Bruce, about to lose it: what would happen if I snapped and killed you?

Damian: that would make you homicidal.

Bruce: exactly.

Jason: so you’re admitting you’re gay?

Steph, turning to Tim in the cave after patrol: hey! before i forget, you changed all the wifi passwords!

Tim, distracted while looking over a mission he’s working: i did.

Steph: why?

Tim: uuhhhh, security maintenance?

Steph: . . . did- did you just make that up?

Tim: i think so.

Steph: ok, so you changed all 3 to new passwords.

Tim, still not looking away from the batcomputer: yes i did.

Steph: ok, so the penthouse wifi, the cave wifi, and the wifi at home?

Tim: right. and this time i made the passwords unusual so that we would rememebr them, but they wouldn’y be guessed easily.

Steph: great. so what’s the password for the penthouse at WE?

Tim: I Can’t Tell You.

Steph: what?

Tim: I Can’t Tell You.

Steph: why not?

Tim: why not what?

Steph: why can’t you tell me?

Tim: tell you what?

Steph: the password.

Tim: i just did.

Steph: no you didn’t.

Tim: yes i did.

Steph: what is it?

Tim: I Can’t Tell You

Steph, getting annoyed: why not?

Tim, still not fully paying attention: why not what?

Steph: why can’t you tell me?

Tim: I just did.

Steph: are you insane?!

*everyone else is watching and trying desperately not to make a sound* *Babs is recording the footage for later*

Tim: no.

Steph: then what’s the password!

Tim: I Can’t Tell You.

Steph: JERK!

Tim, finally turning away from the computer, confused: what?

Steph: you’re a big jerk!

Tim: why?

Steph: i am asking for one simple password for our wifi in the penthouse!

Tim: and you should have it!

Steph: so what is it?

Tim: I Can’t Tell You.

Steph: i hate you!

Tim: are we good?

Steph: fine!

Tim: fine.

Steph: fine!

Tim: fine.

Steph: fine! can i have the one for the cave?

Tim: yes.

Steph: what’s that one?

Tim: I Don’t Remember.

Steph: why not?

Tim: . . why not what?

Steph: why can’t you remember?

Tim: no, I Don’t Remember.

Steph: ok, why don’t you remember?

Tim: i do.

Steph: ok.

Tim: ok.

Steph: so what is it?

Tim: I Don’t Remember.

Steph: hoooly crap. *hangs head and facepalms* did you write it down?

Tim: why should I?

Steph: In case you forgot it.

Tim, a little bit insulted: i won’t forget it.

Steph: clearly you just did!

Tim: no i didn’t.

Steph: then what’s the password?

Tim: I Don’t Remember.

Steph: what the- we have 3 wifi networks!

Tim: yes

Steph: and you made up all the passwords!

Tim: i did

Steph: and you should know them all!

Tim: by heart.

Steph: and I should have them too!

Tim: of course you should!

Steph: what is the password for the wifi in the penthouse?

Tim: I. Can’t. Tell You.

Steph: what’s the one for the cave?

Tim: I Don’t Remember.

Steph: you have the one for the house?!

Tim: yes.

Steph: and what is that one?

Tim: You Have to Guess It

Steph: III Cannn’t Guess Iiitttt!

Tim: well of course not!

Steph: so what is it?!

Tim: You Have To Guess It

Steph: I caaaaan’t!

Tim: you’re making no sense!

Steph: I’m making no sense?! You’re making no sense!

Tim: I don’t know what to say to you! *throws his arms up for a moment*

Steph: what’s the wifi for the Manor?

Tim: You Have to Guess It

Steph: SCREW YOU!

Tim: i don’t deserve that!

Steph: I asked you for the password for the penthouse.

Tim: yes.

Steph: you said I can’t tell you.

Tim: yes.

Steph: then i asked for the cave one and you said I don’t remember.

Tim: also correct.

Steph: and now the one for the house you say i have to guess it.

Tim: you got them all perfectly! *smiling*

Steph, close to tears: wHatT tHe HeLl ArE yOu TaLkInG aBoUt?

Tim, annoyed again: whoudl you like to see the passwords in black and white?

Steph: Yes i would!

Tim:they’re on my computer!

Steph: can i go look?

Tim: of course.

Steph: thanks!

*she starts to stalk away, its a miracle she already knows his computer password. The others finally lose it, half of them wheezing on the ground as the others are barley able to stand, much to the very exhausted Tim and Steph’s confusion*

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soulmate-game · 3 years

Text

Harley’s Plea for Help: Chapter 2

Chapter 1

“How long do you think it’s gonna take before she decides to sneak out?” Nightwing asked over his comms, lazily leaning against the balcony railing in front of him with his head resting on one hand.

“Dude, I started sneaking out almost twenty minutes ago,” a girl’s voice made Nightwing squeak and turn around, to reveal a teenage girl leaning against the door that led to the balcony he was on. “I didn’t want to draw attention to myself by doing unnecessarily showy gymnastics down from my hotel room’s balcony, no matter how much fun that would be, so I just snuck out one of the hotel’s back exits. Then I looked up to admire the moon and saw you here, staking out what is clearly my suite, and decided to come pay you a visit.”

“How long have you been there? And how did you even get behind me? I hope you didn’t break and enter, that’s an actual lived-in apartment behind us right now,” Nightwing asked, turning around to analyze the daughter of Harley Quinn for the first time in person.

She looked just like in her pictures, of course. Jet black hair like her father’s, except it seemed to have a bluish shine in the light. And her eyes were definitely Harley’s— thank goodness for that —vibrant blue and clearly analyzing him with the same amount of intensity as his did her. He had to bite back a chuckle. In a turn of complete irony, she really did look like a Wayne kid. Fit all of Bruce’s usual criteria to be adopted. But she was tiny, even smaller than Harley’s lithe form. He, Bruce, and Tim were of the hypothesis that the exposure both her parents had to Ace Chemical’s vats of acid likely had an effect on her DNA that stunted her growth. Perhaps there were other effects that they wouldn’t be able to figure out until they got to know her better, too, though it was clear that her skin was a likely one. It wasn’t unnaturally pale like her parent’s after their acid dips but it was paler than normal for sure, just a shade or two shy of being paper white.

And he could see, now, what Harley meant when she referred to Marinette as a powerhouse. It wasn’t very noticeable in pictures, but up close Dick could see the carefully honed muscle of an acrobat curling over her otherwise slim build. Combined with the knowledge that Marinette had been taught at least some serious self defense from a young age, he could see how such a tiny package could be a remarkable threat when necessary.

Marinette grimaced as the other Batfam, who were all nearby staking out her room from different angles, dropped onto the large balcony with them.

“Uh, well. I didn’t break and enter, I rather not get off to a criminal-ly start on my first night in Gotham, you know? But I realized that even though I was able to figure out the exact room you were staking me out from, I realized as soon as I got into the first floor of the building that I had no idea how to actually get to you. So I just climbed the stairs all the way to the roof and scaled my way down to this balcony, and pretended I’ve been here for a while when really I was barely able to hear you ask when I was gonna sneak out. I’m still out of breath, actually,” she put a hand on her chest and sure enough her breathing was still slightly fast. But not enough to be worrying or even all that noticeable. Yet another piece of evidence to show that she was a very active individual and had resistance built up to physical activity.

“Yup,” Robin groused grumpily, crossing his arms. “With all that rambling, you couldn’t be anyone else’s child but Quinzel’s.”

Marinette’s face immediately flushed pink all the way to her ears. “I’m sorry! I’ve been trying so hard to quit that habit, too!” She grumbled a bit to herself, putting her face in her hands. They all chuckled at the display. Red Hood ambled over, draping his arm over her shoulders (he nearly had to bend in half to do it, the height difference was that bad).

“As adorable as your freak out is, why’d you even come up here anyway? There’s no way you’d scale down a ten-story building just to say hello.”

She let out a heavy sigh at that, slowly peeling her face out of her hands. “Yeah, I recognized you guys right away. And honestly, as much as Momma Harley would be super proud of me for managing to give an entire group of vigilantes the slip, she’d also ground me for life if she found out that I saw you guys and still snuck away even though she probably swallowed her pride and asked you guys to babysit me, right? Self preservation. Contrary to popular belief, I do actually have some.”

“Wait,” Red Robin held up a hand, brows clearly furrowed under his cowl. “You expected her to ask for our help?”

“Well,” she made a so-so motion with her hand. “I didn’t think of it beforehand, but it all clicked once I saw Nightwing. I know how much my mom is worried about me, especially since you-know-who broke out a few days ago. She is more than worried enough to ask you guys for help. Even if she does complain about you guys, a lot actually, she also has made it clear that she trusts you guys with the stuff that actually matters.

“‘You know who’?” Batman repeated, arms crossed. If Marinette squinted, she thought there might have been a grin on his lips. “Is that how you always refer to him?”

“What else am I gonna call him?” she asked, face going deadpan. “Sperm donor? Source of a large amount of my self doubt and depreciation? The prime reason I haven’t been able to see my mom in person more often over the years? Oh, I know! How about I just always refer to him as ‘that bastard I wanna punch,’? That sounds good!” she rolled her eyes sarcastically. “Only one person in this world has the right to be considered my father in any capacity, and it sure as hell isn’t him. Genetics notwithstanding.”

Red Hood straight up guffawed at that, landing several rough pats on her back that made the girl stumble a bit. “Yep, I like this one! But as fun as it would be to see you give that jackass a mean left hook, it’s better if he never finds out who you are or knows that you’re here,” the vigilante’s voice got dark and serious very quickly. “He doesn’t forget people he finds interesting easily, and if he ever finds out about the connection you have to him, he’ll be a constant threat in your life.”

“I know,” Marinette agreed with a nod. “And if this conversation was happening two years ago, I’d say that my mom’s concerns aren’t unfounded. That I am too easily emotionally compromised and despite my deep seated issues and hatred for that man, I couldn’t guarantee he would be unable to get to me.”

Batman straightened up, as did all of his sons around him. None of them had missed the ‘if’ there. Batman’s voice went from charmingly deep to it’s usual gruff grumble. “What changed in two years?”

They all watched as Marinette gulped, taking a deep breath as she stalled for time, looking out at the view on the balcony before seeming to steel herself and return her gaze to Batman’s. When she did, it was suddenly full of iron will.

“I didn’t lie when I told Mom that I came to visit her— but that isn’t the whole truth, either. If I just wanted to visit her in Gotham, I would have waited until I was eighteen like we agreed. But I can’t wait, Paris can’t keep going on like this. I entered that contest because it was the fastest way to see you. I didn’t know if I would win, but… I had to take the chance. There was no way I’d be able to get to Gotham behind my mom’s back otherwise.”

“What are you talking about?” Robin hissed, stepping up to his father’s side. “Paris has been silent. If anything were happening, we would have heard about it by now.”

“No, you wouldn’t,” Marinette corrected, never losing that ironclad look in her eyes. “Because a combination of magic and politics is keeping it quiet. No news about Paris’ situation is able to leave the city limits. Magic makes any non-native who leaves Paris think that everything they experienced was just a crazy dream. Natives won’t forget, but politics has all of us under very strict NDAs if we leave city boundaries, and all of our local news and social media is blocked from being accessed by anyone outside the city. But, I figured a little breaking of the rules wouldn’t exactly put a stain on my family’s reputation or anything, so,” she dug in her pocket and pulled out a thumb drive, holding it up for all of them to see. She swallowed again, but never stopped her eye contact with Batman. She held out the thumb drive.

“I came to Gotham to ask for your help. This sped things up, I didn’t expect to see you on my first night here, but two years in Hawkmoth’s Paris has really taught me how to roll with the punches. This,” she shook the thumb drive. “Holds videos of every fight since HawkMoth first showed up. It has all the information I’ve gathered over two years, tracks his movements and lists all his targets and— everything. But I’m not a detective, I’m a designer. I make clothes, I spar on the weekends, I am not good at getting evidence to prove that someone is a magic-abusing villain holding an entire city hostage.”

“We’re gonna need some details, Little Q,” Red Hood finally removes his arm from around her shoulders, instead crossing his arms and looking down at her sternly. “If your city has a villain holding it hostage, is anyone fighting him? And if you do have someone fighting him, why don’t you need our help, or why didn’t they call the Justice League? The JLE should be in Paris, right?”

Marinette snorted, face scrunching up in obvious distaste. “I’ll have to answer those a little out of order. First; the JLE was kicked out of Paris. They moved their headquarters to Italy about five years ago, I’m just surprised they apparently kept that secret from you,” she gestured to all of them, who indeed seemed very caught off guard by that tidbit. But Marinette just sighed and continued. “Though that’s a good thing, actually. We do have heroes, it started out as just a pair but it’s grown into a small team out of necessity. They didn’t call the Justice League because the last thing we need is any powered heroes coming in and making it worse— your league doesn’t have the best reputation for letting newer heroes take the lead even on their home turf, you know,” she pointed out, which made Batman shift a bit guiltily. He knew the JL was often a bit… heavy handed in their methods.

“What makes the situation so bad that you don’t want to bring experienced heroes into it?” Red Robin cut in, sounding as if the whole situation was a puzzle he was determined to sort out. Which, really, was exactly what Marinette had been counting on. She shot him a finger gun, grinning.

“That’s exactly the point! Hawkmoth uses a magical artifact, like I said— but this artifact can brainwash anybody who experiences even the slightest negative emotion. Sadness, anger, fear— anything negative. And it gives them powers, but puts them largely under his influence,” her expression twisted again, this time into a wry little grimace. “I guess you can say that my momma’s psychiatry background has secretly come in handy a lot over these past two years. And Hawkmoth is exactly why I try to tell Momma Harley to stop visiting me— I have worked my butt off to keep her from finding out about his attacks or getting Akumatized. Every time she shows up it gives me a heart attack!”

“Akumatized?”

Marinette waved a hand dismissively. “It’s the term used for when someone is turned into a super powered villain because of HawkMoth. The brainwashing— really it’s more similar to a straight up corruption. The person usually lacks their usual moral compass, and just seeks to soothe whatever set off their negative emotion in the first place. Usually, that means they seek a bloody revenge. And if someone who already has extensive training or extremely strong powers gets Akumatized, guess what?” She made jazz hands even though her face was deadpan. “Extra powers, or amplified ones, for the metas or superheroes who are Akumatized. And imagine what someone with, say, Batman’s level of experience could do if he had powers and no moral compass,” the silence that followed her words was deafening. She just nodded, knowing she had gotten her point across. “I’ve been working my butt off to stay positive, because if I’m Akumatized…” her shoulders fell, and she had to swallow a lump in her throat. “... I have no idea what I’d turn into, but if you take into consideration both my training and my family history… it’s really best if we never find out what kind of magic-powered supervillain I’d make.”

“So, let me get this straight,” Nightwing said after another long moment of silence for that to all sink in. He gestured at her with an open palm. “You’ve been dealing with a terrorist for two years who targets emotional vulnerability, you apparently have never been corrupted by this magic at least to present day, but your mother still worries about you being very emotionally fragile. And your heroes are not detectives, which is clearly what you need or you wouldn’t have asked us for our help.”

Marinette nodded. “I used to be very impressionable. At the start of all this, I was a huge people-pleaser. I got attached to new people in a matter of minutes. My mom always said I reminded her too much of herself— but two years of fighting off a guy trying to get into my head—“

“Wait,” Batman nearly barked, taking a step forward. “He’s been targeting you? You specifically?”

Marinette nodded grimly, mouth a straight line. “Not from the beginning, but this past year it’s been painfully obvious. He might be able to sense the strength of people’s emotions, and unfortunately I don’t exactly experience my emotions very… gently. All of my emotions tend to the much more intense side of the spectrum. If that’s true, then he might know that any negative emotion I feel will make an extremely strong Akuma. Either that, or he’s going by process of elimination. All of my friends, except for one, have been Akumatized already. So has my Papan and my grandmother. But it’s obvious when he’s targeting someone, I’ve felt him try to override my will on several occasions. But I can’t just repress all of my negative emotions forever, so consider us working against the clock right now. That thumb drive has all the details you need about our heroes, how exactly Hawkmoth’s powers work, and so on.”

“Do your heroes know you’re asking for our help?” Red Robin asked, gaze burning a figurative hole through Marinette’s face. “Better yet, if this drive has as much information as you say it does, how did you get it?”

Marinette handed the drive over to Batman, who finally took it and tucked it in his belt as she answered.

“Momma Harley might have a lot to say about your detective skills, but you are all still strangers to me. So consider this a test of your abilities— I expect that you will all go to extreme lengths to verify all of the information I gave you anyway. After all, I’m still the daughter of your most hated enemy. Right?” She met each of their gazes, one by one, with a challenging one of her own. “You’ll just have to figure out my connection to the heroes on your own. And how I got the information, too. It shouldn’t be too hard for the so-called world’s greatest detectives. And maybe this can double as a trust exercise. I fully expect you guys to scour through every inch of my past, and dig up everything you can on me. I encourage you to try to find everything you can, so that hopefully you can decide to trust me on your own once you have all the details laid out in front of you. By the way, for your own sanity? I’d start with reading about all of our heroes’ powers and abilities before you watch any footage of past attacks.”

Red hood rocked back on his heels, trading glances with the other vigilantes before they all shared a nod. Apparently having decided their course of action, Red Hood leaned down and hoisted Marinette up into a princess carry. All traces of her previous iron will melted away in favor of the high pitched squeal of surprise she gave, and once more she became an overly flustered teenager.

“Alright, little cutie. Let’s get you to your mom’s place before she and her crazy plant lady fiancé come hunting us down.”

“I can walk! I can freerun on my own! Mon dieu please let me down! Eeeeek!” She squealed again as Robin slapped a domino mask over her eyes and Red Hood wasted no time jumping over the balcony railing with her still in his arms. The fact that they were lowered down by a wire wrapped around Hood’s waist didn’t seem to take away any of the fright that came with a sudden drop over an eighth-story balcony.

Part 1

@emotionalsupportginger @alysrose-starchild @emistar0 @kibastray @justanotherfanficlovinbitch @alyssadeliv @blackroserelina @blackstarlight-co @readingalldaysleepingallnight @maanae @aespades @jaybird-and-co @fleursroses @probably-a-hologram @misterpianoman (didn’t work sorry)

#dc x mlb #dc x miraculous #maribat #bio!dad au #Bio!mom Harley Quinn #Bio!Dad joker #mlb x dc #ml x dc #Harley’s Plea for Help #platonic brucinette #platonic jasonette #platonic Harley Quinn x Marinette

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abizarreyodelingincident · 3 years

Text

Braaaaaaains...

Jason Todd is legally – and biologically – dead. His family noted his lack of pulse at three in the morning, inside the cave, his body laid out on a table with medical instruments.

No, really, tell him something he doesn't know.

What else crawls out of a grave moaning and groaning?

Or, Jason thought his family full of the world's greatest detectives was smarter than this. Apparently not.

****************************************************************

It had been an ordinary night. Calm. The stage for very little costumed crime and barely more regular, non-insane crime as well. Half the menagerie that made up Dick's loving ragtag bunch of younger siblings had even taken the night off.

Nothing should have make him arrive to silence this thick, to this faint echo of sniffling.

He sprinted after the noise.

Damian's fine, left before me. Duke didn't go out, nor did Steph. Babs spent the evening with Cass in the cave, Tim swept the bowery and said he was going to stop by Jason's place to-

He collided with a shaking, tear stained Tim right outside the medbay.

There was a body on the closest table. Others around it, crying, pacing, muttering in denial.

Dick couldn't look.

No, no, please, please no. I can't do that again. I can't!

Scarred skin, too pale – to be Duke or Cass – by death. His breath hitched. No. He. Fuck.

He knew those scars. Those arms. That chest and that fucking Y from navel to shoulders.

“Dick! Jason... he was... I found him in his apartment. And I brought him to the cave... but... Jason doesn't have a pulse. He's... cold...”

Dick stumbled.

No.

No, no, no, that... that couldn't be real.

He caught himself on his little brother. Brought himself into a hug too tight, as painful as the arms gripping his ribs and back. A grip meant for a lifesaving light at sea. For a safeline over a ravine.

Twice. He'd lost the same brother twice. And this time, he didn't even have the excuse of inexperience and unstable situations. He... he patrolled the city whilst his brother was dead, completely oblivious to the fact. How could he? How dare he not know?!

“Shh, Tim, I'm here. I'm here.” But not for Jason, whispered a vicious part of him.

“What's all this?”

Dick's heart just about stopped.

Damian stood at the entrance to the lockers' room, uniform folded under one arm, hair slightly damp from a shower and Bat-themed pajamas worn without shame. His mild annoyance was proof he had no idea of the drama that had happened not twenty feet from him.

With reluctance, he let go of Tim, a gentle hand lingering on his shoulder, before he took a few steps toward his youngest, most vulnerable brother.

“D-Dami, I... ” Damn it, he had to be the one to tell Damian about this. Because otherwise, the person to break the news would be Bruce, and-

Shit.

Bruce.

Oh God. How could they possibly tell him- ? After all their fights, the goddamned shattering that had broken the man he had been, and their last conversations even being more admonishment about protocols that Jason had flippantly disregarded. Bruce would never recover. That was it. The end of Batman.

...But first, God he hated himself, wanted to just curl up in a corner and forget everything, first he had a young brother he needed to talk to. One... one little brother less than just this afternoon.

“Jason... ” He swallowed, his throat tight, his heart in denial, the words so damning, but needing to be said. “Jason did not make it. He... he's dead.”

Damian stayed thoughtfully silent.

Not... not the tearful reaction he had expected, but Damian had grown up surrounded by so much death and horror that he would obviously be guarded. And oh, Dick's heart went to his baby brother, and he truly wished he could

“I do not understand. Why such theatrics for the zombie?”

Dick gasped, knowledge warring with the flash of anger.

“Damian! He's our brother!”

“Did he lose his head?” Damian demanded, and Dick's mind buckled.

“Huh, no, but that doesn't have anything to d-”

“Then, why are you acting so weirdly emotional, Richard?”

Before Dick's temper could catch up to his mouth, the longest and most painful-sounding gasp erupted from the medbay, where, to the general shock of all, Jason's gray-ish body shot upward with both his arms raised.

Electroshocks didn't make you jolt like that.

Electroshocks, in fact, remained in their kit on the other side of the medbay, unused. Because Jason had seemingly been dead long before he had been brought to the cave.

That was roughly the moment when Dick's brain caught up with the first of many hints. Latched onto it with a fool's hope.

“... Damian... When you were calling Jason a 'zombie', what did you mean?”

Damian's brows scrunched up together, a look he meant to be intimidating, but had more in common with a disgruntled kitten. “Exactly that, Richard. Do we not have files on zombies in the computer? Dead bodies walking about animated by unholy powers?”

Jason's not- Dick forced the half formed thought to a halt. For once, he rather wanted to be very, very wrong in how he perceived his family.

“What's with all the noise? Can't someone try to sleep like the dead without screaming?” Jason groused. “Should have gotten myself buried ag-OOF!”

“JASON!” screamed the hysterical teenager that had launched himself at a very lively dead body.

“Huhh? Hi, Timmy?” Jason said blearily, ruffling Tim's hair, eyebags suspiciously prominent. “... Fear gas?”

The blinking slowed, the fog of sleep drifting away as he silently begged the rest of them for an answer.

Happily provided by a still crying Tim. “I thought you were gone!”

“What is dead may never die,” Jason quipped, his mouth twisting in that cocksure grin from his Robin days.

And Dick wanted nothing more than to stop right there, pass out from the relief and joy of his little brother being alive and kicking, but...

But...

That joke. One of many morbidly unfunny jokes and puns.

Bone-deep fatigue crushed his back. A bitter curse for whatever higher forces messing with them echoed strongly inside his skull, before he gave in to the inevitable and inhaled a few times for patience.

“Jason. We thought you were dead-dead.”

With prickly, hedgehog style affection, Jason pushed Tim back and stood up, stretching. “Come off it, Goldie. I wasn't even decapitated. I mean, if you were really worried, you could have just called a necromancer or something.” His expression hardened. “But if you ever call a necromancer on my ass, I'll shoot your perfect glutes.”

Yup, yup, yup, this is happening.

Tim finally wiped the rest of the tears away, helped by one of Stephanie's handkerchiefs, when he froze. “Wait. Your skin's still pale as a corpse.”

The flicker of amusement in Jason's eyes killed it for Dick.

God, how could they have all been this idiotic? If Wally ever learned about this – Shit, did Roy and Kory know before him?!

They were going to laugh their asses off at him.

Jason, unaware of the world recalibration happening in his poor big brother's mind, shrugged and rolled his shoulders – who creaked suspiciously loudly, more like rusty hinges than normal body parts. “Eh, I'm just a bit hungry. Nothing a meal or two won't fix and get some blood flowing back under my s-”

“You're a zombie.”

They turned toward him.

“Way to cross the finish line on time, Mister Rabbit,” Jason drawled.

Barbara, for once, looked completely unprepared. “A zombie,” she repeated, dazed.

Stephanie's nervous giggle died out when she noticed the lack of humor. “... No!”

Cassandra furiously looked down, muttering in her fist. Duke, by contrast, had the expression of a person stuck in a very awkward nightmare.

Even Jason's good-natured ribbing faded in when faced only with the distant screeched of bats. “... Hm, guys, bats, roostery, parasites and octopi? This is old news. What's with all the... ”

He vaguely gestured at their faces.

“Old news?” Tim rasped like he was being strangled.

“I came back from the dead years ago! Come on! Am I in a parallel universe? Hey, Demon Brat,” Jason called, baffled, “you knew, right? I didn't imagine that, right?!”

“Of course, Todd. Mother informed me of everything. Besides, Grandfather's interest in your state of being was of interest for a few weeks. How could I have been ignorant about your zombified state of being?”

In the corner of his eyes, Dick noticed Tim's, Barbara's and Cassandra's expressions all pinching in displeasure. In a way, Dick was reassured. He hadn't been the target of a family-wide hoax to discredit him as an attentive and loving eldest brother. No, he was just naturally blind, apparently.

“He knew?” Tim growled, like it was a personal failing of the fabric of time and space.

Damian's tone was the exact opposite. “And none of you realized...?”

Dick squirmed. “I... huh... you see...”

His baby brother eyed him, completely unimpressed, and for once after years of partnership, Dick felt he deserved every single ounce of it.

“I see... I shall reevaluate the value of this 'detective training' I've been given if this is the result then,” he said, the nearest thing to completely disavowing his older siblings without saying so.

In other circumstances, perhaps the others would have demanded that Damian stay and explain, but he suspected the quelling look it would have deserved prevented them. Not one of them spoke until Damian had disappeared upstairs and the elevator doors had closed.

“Jason, since when have you been a zombie?”

Jason blinked, jaw hanging. Juuuust enough for some of the scar tissue on his face to stretch past normal. Why did Dick only notice that now?

“Wait, you're all serious? How could you not know? I told you guys!”

And there was Dick's pride rearing its ugly head, because no, no he had not been told and maybe his deductive skills needed a very complete overhaul, but his memory was still excellent!

“You never said that. Heck, we weren't even talking until two years ago!”

“I literally told you all that I crawled out of my grave by myself, groaning the entire time. No experiment, no Lazarus Pit, just a body waking up in its own coffin and deciding to breathe fresh air. Does that not scream 'zombie' to you?”

They cringed.

“Not the only one that returned from beyond,” Babs mumbled. He could see her pull up the mental list right there.

“I greeted you all last meeting with a 'What's up, my bat folks? It's me, your favorite zombie!'. What did you think that meant?”

“That you're an asshole with a morbid sense of humor?” Stephanie quipped, and Jason momentarily paused his indignation to high five her. Fair's fair.

“Okay, but what about that time I got shot in the chest and I told you all not to worry about it?”

“I just figured you were going to get stitched up by Leslie or yourself, you know, regular bat neuroses,” Tim confessed.

Dick made a mental note to keep a much closer eye on Tim's patrols for the next few months.

“From a bullet chest wound?” Jason asked with an incredulousness that was not at all earned, because he was a freaking zombie!

“I thought your armor had blocked it! The hole wasn't bleeding!” Tim protested, cheeks red and tone defensive.

“Well, yeah,” Jason replied. “I don't bleed. It's like some fruit pulp or something. Ain't coming out if you don't press. My heart's not pumping.”

That's a 'nevermind' on the smoothie I saved for after patrol.

“Well, I know that now,” Tim said.

“I feel like I should write it down on the plaque or something,” Jason still sounded amazed, and might have pinched his arm just to be sure he hadn't been daydreaming, “Like, 'a good soldier AND A VERY DISCRETE ZOMBIE!' in big flaming letters. With a spotlight. And a dictionary opened on 'Zombie' or 'Undead'. You know, just in case the next batbrat to come along needs a few subtle hints about my true nature. What'd you think, Dick?”

He could not have been blushing harder than he currently was. “I think shut up.”

“Of course. What about when I shoved my deadly cold toes at Tim under a blanket?”

“Cold feet.”

“Never eating around you guys?”

“Daddy issues with Bruce,” Barbara deadpanned, and got a sock thrown at her for her honesty.

However, Duke, poor kid, turned green. “Wait, so when you offered me some jellied brain... was that not a death joke?”

Dick's stomach spontaneously shrivelled.

By the grimaces and sharp inhales all around, that was a common reaction.

Then the worst possible thing happened: Jason grinned.

He strutted, all confidence and brashness, and viper-quick, snatched an arm around Duke's shoulder. “Narrows, Nightlight, my tiny bitsy bro, everything I do is a death joke. My very existence laughs at death.”

Inside the batcave, the groaning was long-suffering and shameful.

“But that was actually brains,” Duke countered.

“Yeah. Calf brains. It's a delicacy.”

Tim massaged his forehead. What a mood.

Duke narrowed his eyes. “It was purely for the joke, wasn't it?”

Jason patted him on the back so hard Duke faltered. “One tragically wasted on your obtuse mind. I prefer me some Tête fromagée instead. Less like grainy jello.”

Stone-faced, Barbara wheeled herself toward the batcomputer. There, upon a series of quick clicks, she opened up the Bats's files. “Alright, you had your fun. Do you need to eat brains or are you just the world's least funny meathead?”

“I'm the world's most misunderstood vigilante!” Jason loudly protested, milking their pain for all it was worth. And then some. “But yeah, I do. No grey matter in there” -- he tapped his belly -- “no thinking up here.” -- his skull.

“Need some better quality brains then,” Tim stage-whispered to Stephanie.

Cass pointed the finger at Jason. “No killing for brains.”

Jason's good humor flickered with a flash of green. “Ain't ever done it, never will. It's a matter of morals, not hunger, Cass.”

Dick swooped in that minefield before it exploded.

“Great! Proud of you, Jay! You're the good kind of vegetarian zombie,” he said, putting an arm around his ginormous little brother's shoulders.

Wait a minute...

“Hey, you're older than when you died! Zombies don't age.”

“No, I was thrown into a Lazarus Pit, and the evil waters cured the malnutrition-induced delay on my growth. Haven't aged a day since.”

“I just thought you had a weird babyface thing going on,” Tim said.

Jason's grin turned sardonic. “Quite the opposite, Timber.”

Dick put his head in his hands in some vain attempt to prevent his brain from leaking through his ears. With his luck, his little brother would 'playfully' eat some of it. “There's no way you look this rugged at biologically sixteen! I refuse to believe that.”

“Can you imagine my power if I'd been allowed to reach my full potential?” Jason leered, eyebrows waggling like waves in a sea at storm. “So many heart attacks.”

Barbara and Cassandra exchanged a silent look, and, after a solemn nod, Cassandra reached up to slap Jason upside the head.

“Thank you, Cassandra,” Barbara told her. “Jason, never do such a thing again.”

The disgruntled groan that followed must have been on purpose, because Jay was indeed an asshole.

“Besides, it's not like the world will ever know,” Tim said, cutting, a smirk hiding by his hand.

Dick really thought his little brother was far too relaxed upon learning that Jason was one with the undead. Sure, they had all encountered various levels of zombies during their missions, from all sorts of oral traditions and cultures, alien viruses and hidden nanobots piloting meat puppets. It wasn't even classified as a nation-wide crisis to encounter free-roaming zombies. But since the chronically unalive individual in question was one of their own, Dick felt he was owed at least a whole evening of frazzled panic and incomprehension for once.

“Oh?” Stephanie instead asked, sensing blood.

Tim shrugged. “Well, you know, no pulse, no blood flow,” he said with an angled eyebrow nodding at Jason's crotch

Stunned silence followed, their expressions varying from disgust, horror, unholy glee and, from Jason himself, wide-eyed shock that his shrimp of a little brother had had the balls to assimilate the zombieness fast enough to mock him for him.

Dick prayed for patience. For fortitude. And for an alternate timeline where he was an only child.

Why, for all the love of cotton candy and professional uncriminal clowns, did Tim put THAT image of Jason inside their brains? What had he done, him, a loving model for all of society, to suffer like this?

Maybe if he asked nicely, Jason would eat the image out of his head. He owed Dick that much after this clusterfuck of a conversation.

“Ooooooooh,” Stephanie crooned, miming getting dunked on. With acrobatics.

Jason huffed. “Like I was ever interested in the first place. I ain't Dick.”

“Okay, no slut shaming or virgin shaming, in fact, no shaming at all, please. In this house, we accept all sexualities, but we don't give out raunchy details about any of it, I only have so much brain bleach.”

“Share?” Duke pleaded in a whisper.

Oh, I wish I could, you young innocent soul.

A few beeps turned their attention back to Barbara and the batcomputer. “Well, that's one long overdue update to Jason's files. Anyone else want to share their 'obvious' medical condition?”

“Excuse you, being dead is not a medical condition.”

“I will make you wish for the peace of the grave, Jason.”

Droplets dripped from nearby stalactites.

A few bats flew overhead.

Jason turned to them like nothing had been said.

“Right. That was fun. Best night of my month. Can't wait to tell the Outlaws.”

Dick resigned himself to a series of unflattering texts by the absolute dickheads that were his second family. He could already tell the messages would blow up his phone to the Moon. 'You didn't know your brother that came back from the dead is a zombie?!'

“Have mercy and wait tomorrow morning?”

That smile could have been great or terrible. “You're lucky I'm in a spectacularly good mood, Dick.”

He had lifted his leg over his bike's seat when Duke was struck by genuine worry.

“Wait. Does Bruce know?”

Jason barked out a laugh.

“Of course he does! God knows he's got some massive blind spots, but he's obsessive, paranoid and I find subcutaneous trackers on me every week. No way he didn't get the hint before now.”

But, as his gaze went over the rest of them, his good cheer dimmed, his grin slipping off his face as surely as a bit of decayed flesh.

“... Right?”

#fanfic #Jason Todd #Zombie Jason Todd #Dick Grayson #Batsiblings

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batman-katflap · 3 years

Note

Congrats on your milestone! If you want, BruClark where Batman has been magicked into a wolf or creature of your choice on a mission and only Superman can approach him and give him scritches. Everyone is jealous lol

Thank you for your prompt! I hope you like what I did with it XD

“Okay, can I be the first to ask," Hal said. "What the fuck is going on?”

When Hal had been called to the Watchtower, he had expected something routine to be the reason. Perhaps a meeting, or maybe there was some maintenance work that needed to be dealt with, Hell, he wouldn't have been surprised to find out that he was only called to try and free Barry after he'd gotten stuck in the air vents-- again. He did not however, expect whatever it was he had just walked in on. His team on the other hand, already present, appeared far more at ease with the current situation, which if anything, only made Hal all the more confused.

“Uh, so.” Zatanna began, her hands clasped together as though in prayer. “Turns out the spell I was working on had a few issues.”

“And what were those issues exactly?” Hal asked, stopping beside her and looking at the source of his confusion. There was a small dog sitting on Clark’s lap, and whilst a dog's presence in the Watchtower wasn’t exactly novel given Krypto’s occasional appearance, it was what the dog was wearing that really had Hal questioning life. “Seriously, Z, how bad do you gotta mess up a spell for it to give a dog spats?”

“That’s, uh,” Zatanna said, looking all the more put upon. “That’s not a dog. That’s Bruce.”

“What do you mean it’s--” But Hal didn’t finish his question as all at once his disbelief evaporated, only to be replaced with a grin so large it hurt. “No way."

“Yup.” She said, letting out a shallow breath. "And I sort of need all hands on deck to try and fix this."

"Why would we wanna fix it, though?" Hal asked, crouching down to Bruce's eye line. He was a small thing, covered in long black fur, a Pomeranian if Hal had to guess. Despite being a dog, he still managed to maintain the same air of general annoyance that Bruce was known for. Hal brought his hand out and went to reach for his ears. "I think he's so much better like--"

But Hal didn’t manage to pet him as Bruce snarled and nipped at his hand about as well as a dog of his size could be expected to do. It still hurt, though and Hal pulled his hand back with a yelp. He looked down at it and saw the red marks start to blossom with blood. "Jesus! That fucking hurt!"

No one however offered Hal any sympathy. "Bruce doesn't like to be touched in his human form, what made you think this would be any different?" Diana asked, raising a brow.

"I dunno! The fact that he's small and fluffy maybe?” Hal rubbed his hand, huffing. “Should be expected to be petted..."

"Yeah, no. He snaps at anyone who tries." Ollie said, holding up his own red hand.

"Clark’s holding him, though." Hal said gesturing at the man in question now scratching behind Bruce's ears like Hal had tried to do. Although his response this time was less ‘sharp teeth’ and more ‘swishing tail’. "Seriously. The fuck?"

"Maybe it's ‘cause I know Bruce better then all of you." Clark said, his smile warm as he continued to pet the dog on his lap. "For one, I knew he wanted to be dressed the minute I came up here. Y’all were just letting him run ‘round naked..."

"Not naked." Dinah said with a roll of the eyes. "He’s a dog, Clark. He’s covered in fur. Our focus was on trying to get him back to normal, rather than covering his…" she grimaced. "How did you put it?"

Clark looked at her indignantly. "His little starfish."

"...Right." Dinah continued, letting out a small sigh. "But now that he is suitably covered, we can focus on getting him back to being human. So Zatanna, what are your thoughts?"

But before she could respond, Hal held up his non bitten hand and stopped her. "Wait." Hal said. "You’re telling me he didn't turn into a dog wearing this?” He gestured to the outfit Bruce was currently sporting. “You put him in it yourself?"

"Yes." Clark said with a nod.

"Because…" Hal went on, making a face. "His asshole was out?"

"I told you. I know Bruce. And I know if he were to be turned into a dog his major worry would be 'certain parts' of his body being on show. So when I got up here and found him backed into a corner, snarling at all of y’all, I knew why. So I ran and got some baby clothes from the store and came back up here, dressed him. and now lookit him.” Clark said the last part whilst lifting Bruce up onto his hind legs and showing his outfit off fully. "He's adorable!"

Bruce looked less than impressed by being shown off in such a way, but he was the only one who did as the rest of the team shared Clark’s own verdict that he did indeed look adorable (though none of them said anything, fearing what Bruce would do to them when he turned back human if they did) Hal however, still had questions. "That explains the pants, sure…" He said, raising a brow. "Not the shirt or the spats. Why is he wearing those?"

"Oh, well, I also knew Bruce would feel like an idiot just wearing the pants, so I got him a shirt and shoes too so he'll have a little outfit." Clark shrugged a shoulder.

"God, Supes you sound like you’re married to him or something.”

Clark looked away at that, his cheeks red and it was then that Dinah looked to Hal, her brows raised in contempt. “Okay, Hal. Now that you know why Bruce looks like a mini maitre d', can we let Zatanna speak?”

“Oh, yeah sure.” He said, crossing his arms and standing to give said magician his full attention. “What do you need from all of us?”

“Well, that’s just it.” Zatanna said. With a wave of the hand and a few backwards words, a book appeared in her hands and she started to pour through it. “I need all of you to kiss Bruce.”

“What?” Clark, as well as a few others, sputtered. Sure enough, the dog in his lap started barking too.

“Look, I know.” Zatanna said, throwing the book into the air where it disappeared with a puff of smoke. “But that’s the thing, from what I can understand about the spell, a kiss from the person closest to the affected party is the only cure.”

“And you think that person is one of us?” Barry asked, his face contorted into a frown.

“Why wouldn’t it be? We’re all close to Bruce in some respect--” She eyed Hal and Ollie before making a face. “Some, more than others. And I just figured we’d try everyone. First League members, then we can move onto others potential options.” At everyones less than enthused expressions, Zatanna let out a strained breath. “Look I know its not ideal, but come on guys, it’s not like Bruce can tell us who--”

But Zatanna didn’t get to finish as Bruce sat up on Clark’s lap and turned around, stepping onto Clark's chest and nuzzling his head against Clark’s chin. With wide eyes, Clark took the hint and tilted his head forward and pressed his lips to the top of his head.

There was a bright flash of light, one that had Hal screwing his eyes shut to try and avoid the worst of. Then, when he cracked them back open, there Bruce was, all sullen faced and blushing as Clark wrapped his cape around him, as-- surprise surprise-- the baby clothes didn’t happen to expand with him.

“Well, now.” Hal said, fighting back a smile. “Got something to tell us, Spooky?”

“Don’t make me bite you again, Jordan.”

In the end, Bruce didn’t bite Hal again, but he did kiss Clark a few more times once they were alone, and then a bunch more times after that.

#superbat #clark kent #bruce wayne #ficlet

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fickle-tiction · 3 years

Text

Adorable

"You'd think by now I'd know exactly where to find you." Diana commented as she descended the steps to the batcave, the smile clearly evident in her voice.

Bruce was standing hunched over at one of his computers, his chair long forgotten infront of another screen a few feet away. He looked up when he heard Diana's voice, though he heard her coming down the steps a minute ago. He offered her a smile, half his mouth quirking up as he glanced at her before going back to typing furiously at his screen.

"Alfred says dinner will be ready in ten minutes." Diana said, coming up behind Bruce. Bruce very deliberately didn't stiffen as Diana snaked her arms around his waist, and he forced himself to relax as her chin settled on his left shoulder.

"Let me guess," The corner of Bruce's mouth was still quirked up into a smile even as his eyes were glued to the screen where he was saving all of his files. "Clark's trying to set the table." It didn't matter how many times Alfred shooed him away, Clark still tried to help everytime he was invited over for dinner. Bruce liked to point out Alfred's double standard, his butler and friend had no problem saddling him with placement settings or stirring pasta sauce. Alfred liked to point out that helping out in the kitchen would help build Bruce's character.

"You could learn a thing or two from him." Diana teased, easily turning with Bruce as be tried to get a look at her.

"Is that so?" He asked, craning his neck to catch a glimpse of Diana's teasing smile as her face rested against his ear.

The three of them had "officially" been together for a little over a month now, though they'd been friends for much longer, and Bruce was trying very hard to loosen up around them. He wasn't usually one for physical affection outside of the bedroom, and it was becoming clear that Diana was going to take every bit Bruce was willing to give, so he was deliberately not shrugging her off or stiffening up even as she hugged him a little tighter around the waist.

"Mmhhhmm." Diana hummed, lips vibrating against the shell of Bruce's ear. He huffed out air through his nose and tried very hard not to flinch away. "you should volunteer to do the dishes tonight. Really shock the two of them." Diana's smile turned bewildered as Bruce let out a choked out laugh and flinched away from her ever so slightly.

"Bruce?" She asked, her hair now trailing along the shell of his ear as she tried to get a look at his face.

"Mmm." Bruce grunted, torn between fighting down his smile and being open and relaxed like he promised himself he would be. "I'll...do th-ha-that." Diana had moved just so, causing her hair to tickle the shell of his ear. Bruce didn't know it at the time, but that split second was the beginning of the end for him.

"What's up with you?" Diana asked, amusement winning out over concern as Bruce allowed a smile to slip onto his face. It all clicked a second later when Bruce twitched away from her hair again, his shoulder coming up to try and rub at his ear out of reflex.

"Oh." Diana breathed, smile going from amused to lethal in a heartbeat. "oh really?"

Bruce didn't have much experience with this kind of playful teasing, but every fiber of his being was telling him to run for the hills at her tone of voice.

"Clark," Diana didn't raise her voice, but they both knew he could hear her just fine. "You need to come see this."

"Was that really necessary?" Bruce asked, hands coming down to settle over Diana's hands around his waist. He wasn't trying to break away yet, after all, how bad could a little tickling really be? Sure, he didn't like when people got close to his ears, it made him want to crawl out of his skin, but Diana was acting like this was some big revelation or something. Surely his body would adjust to it after a minute or two.

Poor naive little Bruce.

"Oh, you have no idea how necessary it is." Diana smirked just as Clark came flying down the stairs to see what was going on.

Clark flew into the batcave and was met with Bruce, looking like a deer in the headlights, Diana's arms wrapped around his waist and her lips pressed against his left ear.

"Has Bruce finally succumb to the need to cuddle?" Clark asked, a hint of teasing in his voice.

"Yup." Bruce answered, while at the same time Diana replies "Better."

"Di," Bruce probably meant for it to sound like a warning, but it sounded more like pleading to the two heroes.

"What could be better than that?" In all fairness to Clark, it was an innocent question. Unfortunately for Bruce, that was the moment his life changed. (He still won't admit if it's for the better or not, but we all know the answer.)

Diana didn't even let Bruce open his mouth before her right hand reached up and her fingers started gently dancing over the shell of Bruce's ear. Her left arm was still tight around his waist, so he couldn't go anywhere. She was expecting him to hold out for a few minutes, maybe insist that he wasn't ticklish and she was being childish, but to her surprise and delight he broke almost immediately.

"Oh, no way." Clark breathed, eyes lighting up as bubbly laughter started to pour out of Bruce as soon as Diana's fingers started wiggling. He'd never heard Bruce really laugh before, and it took him by surprise how light and carefree his laughter was.

Bruce was in hell, he was sure of it. Right up until he felt a gust of wind and then there was another set of fingers quickly scribbling over his left ear. Now he was in hell.

"No no no no" Bruce protested, even as he heaved with laughter. He tried shaking his head to dislodge their fingers, but that didn't even slow down Clark and Diana. It took Bruce a minute to realize he still had use of his hands, but as soon as he did he threw them up and clamped them over his ears, successfully knocking their hands away and greedily sucking in air as his residual laughter left him.

"It seems someone's been holding out on us." Diana chided, giving Bruce's waist another squeeze as he opened his eyes that he has reflexively shut.

"Where else are you ticklish?" Clark asked.

"Nowhere." Bruce answered promptly, even as four hands started squeezing and wiggling around his torso. He was sandwiched between two literal gods and had no hope of escape, but that didn't mean he wasn't going to try.

"Someone's a squirmer." Diana happily noted as her fingers squiggled over the sides of Bruce's stomach. Bruce would have collapsed if he could have, but Clark's chest got in the way of that so he just wound up face planting into a wall of muscle instead.

"Bingo." Clark grinned, taking advantage of the fact that Bruce's hands flew down to latch onto Diana's wrists as she tickled around to the front of his stomach. Clark happily went back to tormenting Bruce's ears, overwhelmingly amused by the way Bruce practically shrieked.

"Okay!" Bruce laughed, squirming between his lovers as he desperately tried to find an escape route. Unfortunately, it seemed that tickling turned his brain into mush, and he couldn't do more than lightly shove at their bodies as he cackled and tried in vein to bat their hands away. "okay, okay, okay!" He repeated as he clamped his hands once more over his ears.

"Okay...tickle here?" Diana asked, quickly scribbling her fingers over Bruce's ribs and making him jolt as nervous giggles started to pour out of his mouth.

"Or do you mean okay, tickle here?" Clark asked as he lightly pinched at the thin skin above Bruce's hips. Bruce snorted, honest to god snorted, at that, thus once again dooming himself.

"Oh my god," Diana said gleefully. "Do that again!"

"Do NOT do that aga-*snort*" Clark rudely cut him off with another well aimed pinch, followed by a series of light squeezes that had Bruce snorting before his laughter turned silent.

"I think he needs to breathe." Clark chuckled, getting in one last good tickle to the bend at Bruce's waist before easing off. Diana followed suit, once more holding Bruce around the waist. She wasn't tickling anymore, just merely holding him up as he sucked in air.

Bruce had his hands held out in front of himself out of instinct, even though it hadn't helped him a drop, as he leaned all of his weight onto Diana. His face neck and ears were bright red, and there were some tears gathered at the corners of his eyes. Diana and Clark would have been worried they'd pushed him too far too soon, if it weren't for the fact that bruce hadn't told them to stop. Hell, he barely tried to get away, save for the squirming that seemed more reflex than anything.

"Are you okay?" Clark asked, bringing a hand up to run it through Bruce's hair. Bruce flinched away, eyes flying open. When he realized Clark wasn't about to tickle him again he relaxed against Diana once more, a soft smile still playing around the corners of his mouth.

"Youre both terrible people."

"Aww, he's adorable when he's trying to act all tough." Diana cooed, kissing Bruce's neck. Her eyes lit up and she shared a meaningful look with Clark when Bruce huffed and flinched away from her. Oh, they'd be exploiting that later.

"I'm not adorable." Bruce grumbled, glaring at the amused smirk Clark was sending his way.

"The cutest." Clark agreed, pinching one of Bruce's cheeks. He raised his hands in front of himself with a soft smile when Bruce smacked his hand away and glared at him, taking that for the signal it was that he was pushing his limits.

"Children." Bruce muttered, trying to scowl as he finally stopped leaning on Diana and stood up straight. He couldn't quite wipe the lopsided smile off his face, since he wasn't trying very hard.

"Did I hear something about you helping with the dishes?" Clark asked, following Bruce as he headed for the stairs.

"After that torment? I deserve compensation, not manual labor."

Diana turned to Clark with a smirk, mouthing "adorable".

"I saw that."

#tickling #fanfiction #tickling fanfiction #ticklish!batman #ticklish!brucewayne #ticklish!bruce wayne #superwonderbat #sorry the spacing is a mess #idk what's wrong with this damn website

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dibs4ever · 3 years

Text

Child Care

Barbara sighed as she neared the manor. She knew she was lucky to of gotten 12 weeks of maternity leave. Most women only got 6

She was even luckier that Dick was able to spend this last month off so the 3 of them could spend time together bonding

And she didn’t want to be a stay at home mom. That wasn’t exactly her thing, she was excited to get back to the library.

But she was going to miss her baby like crazy and felt guilty for leaving him all day.

Even if he was going to be in the safest hands possible

She parked her car and walked around to the back, reaching in and grabbing his car seat

She looked down at her sweet boy. His bright blue eyes staring up at her

He had turned 4 months last Wednesday making him almost 13 weeks old.

“Mommy is going to miss you.” She said

Nathan blinked

“I know- I know- your dad said it a million times and I agree, Great Grandfather Alfred is the best person to care for you. I wouldn’t want you in a daycare where there are multiple other babies and you aren’t getting the attention you deserve. And we can’t hire our own nanny cause- Hello what if she stumbles on a suit or something during all those hours she’d be alone in our house everyday “

Nathan kicked his little legs “Baa” he let out

Barbara smiled, opening the door and letting herself into the manor

“Hello Alfred.” She called making her presence known

Alfred stepped into the foyer from the direction of the kitchen “Ah good morning Ms.Barbara. Right on time, as I assumed you would be. Here let me take young master Grayson from you. “ he extended a hand

Barbara passed him the Car seat.

Alfred set it down on a nearby table and Barbara stepped forward unbuckling him.

She picked him up and hugged him.

“He fed just before I left the house so he should be good for another 2 hours. I packed breast milk in his diaper bag. There’s 3 extra bags just Incase he eats more than usual”

Alfred nodded “I shall put it in the refrigerator as soon as you leave”

Barbara nodded “But if he refuses a bottle- like you know he does sometimes. I will be here on my lunch break to visit and can feed him then. And I don’t know if Dick told you but if there’s an issue he can Zeta tube from Bludhaven to here- he will almost always take a bottle from Dick.”

Alfred nodded “I assure you if there are any issues I will contact one or both of you.”

She nodded kissing the top of her sons head before passing him to Alfred

“He is rolling from both front to back and back to front now, Leslie said he’s 6 weeks ahead in milestones” she spoke smoothing out his dark locks. Little ringlet curls had started taking shape on the ends over the last 2 weeks “So just be careful where you lay him, oh and I try not to do Tummy time immediately after he eats cause then he spits up or gets a belly ache. If he isn’t wanting to sleep but you know he’s tired the song The man on the flying trapeze usually helps.” She said

Alfred nodded “Ms. Barbara I have it covered dear. “

She inhaled “Okay- I know Bruce basically has an exact copy of everything we have at home here, so I probably didn’t need to bring anything except for him and breast milk. But just Incase I packed extra toys, blankets, diapers and cloths as well. Also his stuffed Elephant-he likes to hold that sometimes and oh if he starts to-“

“Ms.Barbara.” Alfred cut her off

Barbara nodded

Alfred rested a comforting hand on her shoulder “If there are any issues I promise to call and ask. Now if you don’t hurry you’ll be late for your first day back at work.”

Barbara nodded slowly “You’re right. I know you’ll take good care of him.” She gave her son another kiss to his head and ran her fingers through his hair “Bye baby, see you tonight after daddy picks you up”

She gave his chubby cheek one last kiss.

“Bye Alfred Thank you so much for caring for him while we work.”

Alfred smiled “It’s an honor believe me.”

Dick was itching in the drivers seat as he rounded the corner to the manor.

After spending a month at home with Barbara and the baby his first day back at work felt like an eternity. He’d left in the wee hours of the morning therefore he hadn’t even gotten to see his son today, since he was asleep when he left for work

He parked his car and made his way up the walkway to the manor. When he opened the door Bruce was walking by

“He just woke from a nap, Alfred is changing him now in the nursery” He informed before continuing on to whatever destination he’d been on

Dick nodded and quickly raced up the stairs. Down the hall to the bedroom next to his old one that Bruce had made into the nursery for Nathan.

Walking in he found Alfred lifting the freshly changed infant from the changing table Alfred grinned “Here you are Master Grayson. Your precious one all well rested, fed and clean. Just for your arrival”

Dick smiled widely “Alfred you’re a miracle worker” he stepped forward taking the baby from Alfred, holding him facing him so he could see his face “Hey buddy, were you good for Great Grandfather? Huh “

Nathan smiled at his father and began kicking his feet excitedly againest Dick’s chest “Yeah? I missed you.”

He brought the baby to his chest and hugged him

Nathan let out a coo

Dick chuckled and walked with Alfred down the hall back down the stairs “So how was he Alfie?”

Alfred nodded “Your son was well. He listened to some music in the morning with me while he sat in his bouncer and I cleaned the kitchen. Then he had a bottle and morning nap, after he awoke and had a diaper change Ms.Barbara came for her lunch break and fed him. When she left we did some time on his stomach and exercised those crucial muscles. Ms.Barbara was correct. Master Nathan rolls quite a bit.” He chuckled lightly

Dick smiled “Yup that’s my boy” he lifted his son above his head “Isn’t that right? my boy is growing way too quickly huh? Now remember your agreement Alfred if you see him hit a milestone while we are at work don’t tell us! Just let us think we saw it first.”

Nathan laughed , and Alfred let out a chuckle

“I’ll be sure to remember that Master Dick, there were no issues today. Your son was a perfect baby. I don’t think he cried at all.”

Dick nodded “Good to hear. We’ve discovered as long

as we follow his feeding and sleep schedule to a tee he never really fusses.”

Alfred nodded “I discovered the same. I believe this little care arrangement will work out just fine.”

Dick smiled “I’m glad because there’s nobody else I’d rather take care for my son Alfie. Now come on Nate. We have to get home and start dinner so when mommy gets home from work all she has to do is cuddle you.”

Nathan made a gurgled sound

“Yeah? You want to cuddle mommy?” He hugged his son “Tell great grandfather you’ll see him tomorrow.” He took the babies hand and made him wave at Alfred.

Alfred smiled and put a hand on Nathan’s little head. Running his fingers through the baby’s fine hair “See you tomorrow little Grayson”

#dickbabs #dick grayson #barbara gordon #nightwing #batfamily #alfred pennyworth #batfam headcanons

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kyber-crystal · 4 years

Text

pop the question || s.r.

summary: steve goes to his old love to ask her for advice on making the most important decision of his life.

words: ~2.5k

warnings: really nothing, just fluff and cheesy steve as always :)

a/n: this was an old oneshot and it’s poorly written i’m so sorry. post civil war au where everyone is happy and peggy is still alive hehehehe let’s keep in mind this is unedited so there’s a lot of errors.

Upon hearing that your boyfriend was going to go visit Peggy, you immediately jumped at the opportunity and begged him to let you tag along. Hearing countless stories about the fearless woman who helped found the very organization that you had been a part of for so long made you want to see her in person. So after several days of convincing, he finally caved in and allowed you to come with him.

The room she was staying in was brightly lit and minimalistic, mostly uncluttered with the only thing on the wall being a framed black-and-white photo of her back in the 40's. A grey-haired woman lay peacefully in the middle of the bed and as you took a step forward, she stirred slightly and for a moment you were afraid you'd woken her up in the middle of her sleep.

Her eyes opened and a bright smile lit up her face, softening immediately upon seeing the two of you side by side. "Oh, do come in...And who is this beautiful lady you've brought along with you, Steve?"

"I'm Y/N. Former SHIELD agent, currently an Avenger," you explained as you made your way over to her. She reached out and gave your hand a quick squeeze, returning your warm smile. "It's so nice to finally meet you. I've heard so much about you."

"And I've heard plenty about you as well," she replied kindly, "You're even lovelier in person."

You laughed nervously and rubbed the back of your neck. "I don't think so."

"I've always wanted to get to know the woman he's fallen so hopelessly in love with."

"Peggy..." Steve felt his cheeks heat up at her statement. "stop, you're embarrassing me—"

"I can tell why he chose you," Peggy smiled, "He's a good man...I know he loves you more than anything."

"Actually, I beg to differ, he loves Bucky more than me," you raised an eyebrow in suspicion at the super-soldier. "He wouldn't pay attention to me after he got roped into an Uno deathmatch last night."

"Classic Rogers," she laughed, shaking her head in disbelief as he pulled up a chair to sit next to you, by her bedside, "a true child at heart. I see you haven't changed much over the years."

Steve took your hand in his, intertwining your fingers together and soothingly rubbing circles across your palm with his thumb. Peggy noticed the softened look in his eyes when he glanced over at you and you felt your face grow warm.

"So how long have you been together for?"

"Almost two years," Steve replied, with a light pink shade tinting his cheeks. "Our second anniversary will be on..."

"May 20th. Two weeks from now," you finished his sentence.

"That's wonderful," Peggy laughed again, "I wish you two the best in your relationship."

"You're too kind," you thanked her, "I've been a huge fan of yours for so long."

"And I, you. He always talks about you every time he visits. He never shuts up about you, so I was dying to meet you from the moment he first mentioned your name."

"What did he say?" you looked over at your boyfriend to see that he was now flushing a bright tomato red, much to both yours and her amusement. "It was all good things, I assume?"

"Of course. He tells me he's never been this happy in his life until he met you...I honestly couldn’t be more proud."

"Aww, Steve," you nudged him in the side as he grew an even deeper shade of red, "you're so sweet."

"He is a hopeless romantic," she added on. "Captain America is great with the ladies."

"Peggy!" Steve exclaimed.

"Aw, you're making him blush," you giggled.

"He is the easily flustered type, if I'm being completely honest with myself here, though one might not see that right away when they first meet him," she agreed, but then her face fell. "Y/N, would you be a dear and get me a glass of water and some yogurt from the cafeteria? You just have to head straight down the hall, then turn right. You'll know it when you see it."

"Yeah, of course," you nodded as you stood up. "Just a minute."

Once you were out of earshot, Peggy gestured for Steve to come closer so he could hear her speak better.

"I'm glad you found a woman like her to stick by your side," she said quietly, "All these years, I waited for you, and I was completely, utterly heartbroken at the idea of not being with you ever again. But after hearing you talk about her frequently and seeing your face light up every time her name was mentioned...I didn't want to take that away from you. You're still that good man with heart from Brooklyn I met so long ago, Steve, and I hope you'll continue to treat her well. She’s a real keeper. Promise me you'll keep her close."

"I will," he promised, reaching over to gently squeeze her hand. "I love her more than anything, and there's nothing I wouldn't do to make her happy."

"Good," she nodded with a smile, "you make the perfect pair with her."

After you returned with Peggy's yogurt and water, you stayed for about an hour and a half longer before a buzzing sound from your phone indicated a new text message.

Natasha: Hey, love. I'm in the parking lot right now, where do you want to go for lunch? I kicked Bucky out before he dragged us to shawarma for the third time this week, so it's your pick today. Thank me later.

You: I'll be out in a sec. Meet you outside.

Natasha: See you in a bit.

You looked back up at Peggy after sliding your phone in your purse, giving her an apologetic look. "I'm afraid I have to go now. I have a lunch date. Natasha doesn't like to be kept waiting, especially when there's food on the line."

"It's okay," she reassured you as you stood up and shook her hand again. "It was absolutely wonderful meeting you. I hope you can come and visit again soon."

"Of course."

After exchanging one last round of goodbyes with her and Steve, you slung your purse over your shoulder and pushed the doors open to head outside, where Natasha was awaiting you in Tony's Audi.

"Hey, girlfriend," Natasha sent you a flirty wink and wave. "Get in."

You slid into the passenger's seat, buckling on your seatbelt as she stepped on the gas pedal. "Hey."

"So, how'd it go?"

"It was pretty nice. She seemed to ship it pretty eagerly," you chuckled. "Oh, also, Thai food."

"Got it." She typed in the directions to the restaurant into the GPS. "That's cute, having another person who's an avid shipper of Y/N x Steve. You guys have any plans for your anniversary?"

You shook your head, "I have no idea. Usually, it's him who makes the move and goes all out for the night, but I'm not sure what either of us have in mind this year."

Oh, he definitely had something in mind.

There was a burning question sitting in the back of his head and had been doing so for as long as he could remember. Right as he was prepared to leave half an hour later, he decided to ask Peggy and get it off his chest.

"Could I ask you something important?"

"Of course."

"I, uh..." he fiddled with his thumbs nervously for a few seconds before reaching into his jacket pocket and pulling out a tiny, cubic box encasing a gorgeous diamond ring inside. "Because our anniversary is coming up soon...I wanted to pop the question. How should I do it?"

"Oh, that's wonderful!" Peggy clasped her hands together excitedly. "Well...I'd suggest you go over-the-top for this occasion, it's a big, life-changing moment so why not? Don't be afraid to go all out, be romantic."

"What should I do, then?"

"Hmm. What are some things she enjoys?"

"Laser tag, crushing her opponents and beating them to a pulp in fights, Tom Cruise, Italian food, and Taylor Swift. She’s a popular pop singer these days."

"Ah, I see," she laughed, "She's a woman who enjoys variety."

"Exactly."

"A nice candlelit dinner would help set the mood very well, but if you're not wanting to pop the question in front of a crowd, you could always set that dinner up at home. Are any of you good cooks?"

"Bruce makes good pasta, and Vision's the baker of the compound."

"Back when my husband and I were still dating, he'd always surprise me with nice little fancy dinners at home. I believe that is the way to a girl's heart; sometimes you do not need to be extravagant to win her over. And you said she likes Taylor Swift, yes?”

“Yeah...”

“Take her to a concert! I heard from my niece that she’s in town right around the time of your anniversary...so you’re in luck. Get tickets, and take her there.”

"Thank you so much, Peggy. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Anytime, Steve."

...

"So," Natasha spoke up as you were on your way back to the compound after lunch, "it's been two years since you finally got off your asses and admitted you were in love with each other, how do you feel?"

"I honestly don't know," you shrugged, "but I guess I have you to thank, right?"

"Damn right you do," she smirked, "I've been rooting for you two since we were called in to take down SHIELD, and I started suspecting things during the Battle of New York."

"That was three years ago! And New York was five!"

"I know!"

You let out a long sigh, a wistful look appearing on your face. "I wish Mom and Dad were here to see where I am right now. You know, they always pushed me to get back into the dating game once I got over my nasty breakup in college...before I got my level 8 SHIELD promotion."

"Didn't they always tell you that they wished you'd date Cap?"

"They did, actually," you chuckled, "and here I am now. Their dream has become my reality."

"I always loved your mom. Remember when we were having dinner at their house? She snuck me extra cookies under the table. Being your best friend for over six years has its perks, you know."

"And she'd fangirl over Thor."

"Ho, boy. Yup," she shook her head as she thought back to that chaotic family dinner.

Two weeks went by in a flash, and before you knew it, it was the day of yours and Steve's anniversary. Strangely enough you'd been prevented from seeing him all day, with the team making extra efforts to keep you separated.

After a fancy home-cooked dinner, you found yourselves curled up together on the couch as you absentmindedly watched Tangled - one of your favorite Disney movies of all time. Your head was resting on Steve’s broad shoulder as he traced patterns on your arm, feeling his breath gently fanning over your head.

But partway through the movie, you noticed he seemed to be fidgeting a bit as well, glancing between you and his pockets frequently.

"Hey," you placed a gentle hand on top of his, still staring ahead, "are you okay?"

"Huh? What? Yeah, I'm fine," he blinked a couple times before snapping out of his daze.

"Okay..."

Several more minutes passed in silence before he decided to speak up again. “...If I recall, you’re into Taylor Swift.”

“Oh yeah! Why do you ask?”

“An insider told me she’s going to be in Brooklyn this weekend for a throwback tour. I managed to snag last-minute tickets for the two of us...what do you say?”

“YES,” you practically squealed, jumping out of your seat and throwing your arms around him. “You’re the best! I love you.”

“I know, darling, I love you too,” he laughed, one hand rubbing your back as the other was absentmindedly fiddling with the box in his pocket. You blew it, Rogers...

...

You were nearly bombarded by paparazzi as soon as you stepped out of your Audi with Steve by your side, reporters flooding your path. The guards at the main entrance were quick to notice, however, and led you aside so you could enter through a different route.

“This feels so surreal,” your voice echoed across the walls as you made your way down the hall hand-in-hand. “I’ve been dreaming about this moment ever since I was a kid.”

“I’m glad I was able to make that dream come to life.”

“This is why you’re the best person ever.”

“Not because I always have your back during missions?” he raised a brow.

“That too, but also because of the fact that you got me tickets to the concert of one of my favorite artists ever.”

He chuckled. “I get that.”

You ended up standing right in front of the stage - so you had not only a close-up view, but could hear everything beyond fantastically. As Taylor came out on stage and began to sing, Steve couldn’t help the look of adoration that crossed over his features at the sight of your brightened eyes and glowing complexion. You truly looked like an angel - and he knew for sure in that very moment, you were the person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.

His train of thought was interrupted at one point by you grabbing his hand and squealing excitedly. “My favorite!”

Steve recognized the familiar, soothing tune as Love Story. He recalled you and Natasha drunkenly dancing around on karaoke night to this very tune - heads thrown back in laughter as you exaggerated your movements, making everyone laugh. You’d explained that the reason why you were so attached was because listening to it made you long for a happy ever after - a perfect future. A girl could dream.

Romeo, save me, I've been feeling so alone I keep waiting for you, but you never come Is this in my head? I don't know what to think He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring And said,

You were too busy jumping around and singing your heart out to notice the spotlight was now shining down on you, and it was only when the crowd started shrieking in excitement that you turned around to see-

Steve was down on one knee, holding up a tiny velvet box with a beautiful diamond ring nestled in the very center. Taylor was grinning down at you two as she continued to sing, the audience chanting for you to say something.

"Marry me, Juliet You'll never have to be alone I love you and that's all I really know I talked to your dad, go pick out a white dress It's a love story, baby, just say, "Yes"

“Yes! Yes,” you nodded, choking on a happy sob as you put a hand over your mouth, letting him slide the ring on your finger. “Yes, I’ll marry you.”

He stood back up and wound his arms around your waist, pulling you in for a passionate kiss to your lips.

Oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh 'Cause we were both young when I first saw you

...

if your name is striked out, that means i couldn’t tag you for some reason

general tags: @yoomum @captainchrisstan @sandystoriess @naomiiiiiiiiiii04 @patzammit @rynhaswritersblock @capcapcapsicle @wheresmyjae @thinkingofbuckybarnes @carryonmywaywardbucky @musicalkeys @buckybarnesthehotshot @zaddychris @optimistic-dinosaur-nacho @sylvie-writes @sis-it-dont-add-up @tonystankschild

permanent tags: @sandwitch-god @renaissancecherub

steve/chris tags: @marvelfanatic16 @angrybirdcr @speechlessxx @epiphanybucky @smokeandnailz

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olivia-anderson-fanfic · 3 years

Text

Satisfied, Part 40

First

~~~

Marinette didn’t know when exactly she ended up living at Wayne Manor full time, all that she knew was that it happened. Eventually, staying over to work with Tim, to spar with Damian, to talk to Jason and Dick, morphed into her never really going home. After all, it was always too late, or the bed was too soft to get up, or there was a dog asleep in her lap how dare you suggest she move.

But her routine didn’t change much at all. Their coffee was returned to them, so Tim and Marinette spent basically all day binge-drinking and working (with mandated breaks enforced by Jason and Dick). At night, well…

“Another boys night?” She said innocently, barely even looking up from what must have been the millionth flower she had embroidered.

Jason shrugged. “Sorry, Mari, you just wouldn’t want to come.”

Marinette rolled her eyes. Honestly, how had boys night been the best thing they could come up with? They’d been doing this for years. How did they even have secret identities at this point? Still, she nodded and smiled. “Sounds great. Have fun.”

“Try and get some sleep!” Called Dick over his shoulder.

“I won’t!” She yelled back, then went back to work. After a few minutes she stood up and brushed herself off. “Tikki, spots on.”

She grinned when she saw her outfit was finally back to normal. She’d kept the leather jacket, boots, and fighting gloves to hide the fact that she’d been weakened before, but now she’d added some tiny features to complete the look. Long, red ribbons tied her hair into her trademark ponytails, and she’d given herself a utility belt to match the rest of the family (also to hold snacks).

She hopped out the window and then made a large loop around the city to get to her and Damian’s meeting spot.

She rolled her eyes when she saw him. “Man, why’d you have to go for the utility belt first? I owe Bats one hour of sleep,” she whined.

He huffed softly. “Shut up! It’s small and easy to manage!”

She shook her head exasperatedly and pulled a bag of chips from one of her many pockets. “Mhmm.”

“You can’t judge me! You’re the one with streamers following behind you! That’s terrible for battle!”

“But great for aesthetic,” she said, grinning. “But you’re actually wrong. Pull on one.”

He gave her an incredulous look but did reach out to pull on one of the four trails of ribbon. It crumbled in his hand and, after a few moments, began to regenerate itself. “Uh….”

“Yep! It’s essentially streamers but even easier to break. I’m better at fashion than you, Kit.”

He sent her a glare. “Whatever. Let’s get on with patrols.”

‘Patrols’ was quickly derailed when they found a cute stray cat and started chasing it. Bruce would probably let Marinette have a pet if she asked, and it was so cute. She was about two seconds away from catching it when her receiver sprung to life.

She pouted and skid to a stop, bring a hand up to turn it on.

“Ladybug, you should come see this,” said Red Hood.

“Fine, location?”

He gave it to her and she turned off her comm.

“I have to go. Catch him for me?”

“Only if you agree to call him BatCat.”

She rolled her eyes. “I’ll agree to consider it.”

Damian grinned at her and disappeared in search of the cat.

After a bit she managed to find her way to where Red Hood sat on a rooftop. “Hey,” she said casually, dropping down next to him.

“Mari,” he greeted, reaching out to poke her cheek.

“So, is there actually something or did you just want to see me?” She teased, smiling.

He didn’t smile back, nodding to a billboard nearby.

Her eyes found their way to it and she cringed. It had been completely defaced, an uneven coating of black spray-paint making whatever it was originally advertising worthless, the words ‘Come home NightMare <3’ where displayed proudly across it in an acidic green.

She balled her fists. She didn’t want to go back yet, but the Wayne Gala was only a week and a half away at this point. They’d obviously need her there to go over the plan.

The therapy sessions were helping, but the idea of getting back in that suit again… even seeing Kaalki made her feel a little sick to her stomach.

She steeled herself. “Right, I’ll go tomorrow.”

“You don’t have to, y’know.”

She bit the inside of her cheek. Technically, he was right. She could technically just opt not to go and they could hope that the security the Waynes had put in place would be enough. But, on a far more real level, he couldn’t be more wrong. She knew that they were getting in no matter how many people they had to fight against them because, ultimately, Batman wouldn’t have them killed and the Rogues had no such reservations.

Marinette pressed a kiss to his cheek. “It’ll be okay.”

She sat on the billboard, swinging her legs back and forth as she rested her head back against the paint. This was fine, she told herself. She wasn’t going to be killing anyone anymore. All the Rogues knew she wouldn’t, if the fact that they’d allowed her to disappear for weeks was any indication.

She wasn’t supposed to kill anyone last time, a pessimistic voice said.

She was glad to see the familiar uniforms below and hopped down, waving at them. “Hey, boys, been a while!”

They didn’t return her smile. She felt a needle prick her neck and next thing she knew she was in a warehouse.

Harley leaned into view, her blue eyes scrutinizing her. “Hey, darlin’, how you feeling?”

“Could be better,” Marinette mumbled.

She felt Harley and Ivy pull her into a hug and numbly returned it, closing her eyes. It only lasted for a few seconds, though, before Harley was quiet literally pulled away. Poison Ivy quickly scampered off into the corner.

She looked up to see Joker and cringed internally. She’d been hoping to never see him again, but she supposed she never had been lucky.

“Hello,” she said carefully, giving a weak grin.

“Hi!” He said, giving a wave and of course he was the one to return her smile. “We have some work to do.”

Marinette bit the inside of her cheek. “We?”

“Yup! Us three are going to Wayne Manor!”

She frowned confusedly and glanced around at everyone else. She couldn’t gauge anything from their faces, but Harley didn’t seem upset so she hoped this meant that she wasn’t about to be killed. She nodded hesitantly.

“Right. I’ll have to get inside the building and find a room that won’t change.”

Joker nodded and offered her a hand up. “You know where Wayne Manor is?”

She stared at his hand and swallowed thickly before taking it. She winced when she realized how warm it was. She’d been expecting something cold and clammy, like a corpse, but this was somehow worse. Knowing he was alive and just like that made her stomach turn.

She opened a portal to outside Wayne Manor.

“I don’t know how we’re supposed to get past the cameras.”

“Like this,” he chirped, pointing his gun at the nearest one and shooting it out.

Marinette clenched her fists. “Yeah, that’s one way of doing it,” she mumbled. She opened a portal to get inside the fence and cringed as another gunshot rang out. He was shooting out every camera, which was a good thing from a ‘breaking in’ standpoint but bad from a ‘protecting the Waynes’ standpoint.

They slipped through the house, undisturbed. Of course it was undisturbed, there was no one here --.

Except there was. And she looked right into the face of Tim.

Her eyes widened and she looked at Joker and Harley, hoping against hope that they would somehow miss him. He was short, this could work –.

But she never was lucky. And Joker had his gun out.

She jumped in front of Tim, pushing him to hide behind her.

Wow, she really wished she could stop having guns pointed at her. It really hadn’t gone well for her since she’d come to Gotham. Last time Robin had been shot, the time before that she’d been.

She wasn’t anxious to see what would happen if she got shot this time, she had no clue how Joker bullets would work with her costume. Would she not be affected? She hoped so, but what would happen if she was? This was a chemical thing, not just the usual brute force. Would the suit be useless against it? Would it keep her alive, choking on her own blood until the chemicals were out of her system? Which would be worse?

And she knew he would shoot her.

Because, ultimately, she was expendable. All the Rogues were to Joker. Sure, it would be a pain to plan around it, but they could always mow down security guards and get inside that way.

She just needed to reason with him. Would he listen to reason? She hoped so.

She felt hands grip the back of her dress and looked back at Tim. He was definitely playing up whatever fear he had, because he looked terrified. Good, at least they would never expect him to be a vigilante.

Not that it would matter if Joker shot them.

“What’s wrong, NightMare? You look like you’ve just had a bad dream.”

She resisted the urge to gag. She’d heard of how bad his jokes were, but really? He was worse than Chat Noir and – WAIT DON’T LOAD THE BARREL LIKE THAT.

She swallowed thickly, a hand reaching back to make sure Tim didn’t try and do something stupid like push her out of the way.

“Joker, we can’t shoot him,” she tried.

“I told you she would be a liability, Harls,” Joker said. “She just doesn’t have the balls to kill people.”

Harley winced beside him, her eyes falling to the floor.

“But it’s not even that!” She said. Except it was. But she could work around it. Reason. She needed a reason. “Listen to me! If we kill him then the Gala probably wouldn’t happen. Bruce loves his kids, right? If he ended up dead, then he would probably cancel. We can’t kill him!”

Joker stared her down. He wasn’t smiling behind (the mask? his face?) anymore, his lips set in a grim line. This was almost worse. She almost missed the smiling, at least then she had an idea of what was going through his head.

And then he lowered his gun.

She let herself relax a little. They continued through the house with Tim at their side. She made sure to stand between him and the Rogues. Just in case.

After she had pretended to memorize every room in the house (because, really, she knew most of it by heart thanks to the prank war), she opened a portal for them.

Joker stepped through and Harley stopped her before she could follow. “Puddin’, we’re just going to have a little chat, okay?”

“Fine!”

Marinette tensed. The portal closed and they were cast into silence. She hadn’t made it too obvious she was a hero, right? After all, it could just be brushed off as her hating the idea of killing…

Right?

Harley waved Tim off and she glanced back at him. He was still holding onto the sleeve of her dress. She gave him a small smile. “Hey, it’s fine. Go back to work, alright?”

He gave her a slightly skeptical look, but then nodded. “Thank you.”

“Of course.”

She watched him leave and then turned to Harley. Was she suspicious? Did Marinette give anything away accidentally? Was this it?

“So, how do you know Tim?”

Marinette tensed. “I’m sorry?”

“You know him. How?”

She bit the inside of her cheek. What could she say? She couldn’t call him her friend, that would make it to obvious who she was. But she couldn’t act like she didn’t know him at all, that would make Harley suspicious…

“I guess I could call it…” She took a deep breath to steel herself. Her face reddened. God, he was going to hear this. “A celebrity crush?”

Harley squealed. “That’s so cute! Oh, and you saved his life? C’mon! He owes you a date!”

Damn it, Joker should have shot her. It would have been less excruciating than this. She buried her face in her hands. “I’d prefer… not doing that.”

The woman wasn’t listening, though. “Oh, you two would be so cute together! Your kids would be --!” Marinette decided that she was not going to pay attention to this, glaring at the ground as they walked through the mansion.

She was never going to live this down.

~~~

SORRY FOR THE LATE UPDATE THERE WAS A HURRICANE

Taglist

@comet-kun @thatonecroc @trippingovermyfeet @swiftie-miraculer13 @nickristus-dreamer @moongoddesskiana @i-am-ironic @indecisive-mess-named-me @thebooki3h @insane-fangirl-of-everything @deepestobservationwombat @theymakeupfairies @fatimaabbasrizvi @clumsy-owl-4178 @fanofalittletoomuch @iamablinkmarvelarmy @nathleigh @lilkymilky @silvergold-swirl @dino-lovingreen-angel @thestressmademedoit @kissa-chan @ladybug-182 @alysrose-starchild @t1dwarrior-of-earth @spyofthenightcourt @rowanrouge @nik-nak-3 @momothefemur @aestheticnpoetic @labschaos @our-preciousss @mochinek0 @eliza-bich @mythogaychic @severelyenchantedwonderland @sashakoi @smolplantmum @bluesimani @tropestropestropes @kitsunebell @keepingupwiththemalfoys @sassakitty @2confused-2doanything @too0bsessedformyowngood @all-mights-asscheeks @demonicbusiness @meg-an-ace @fantasiame @qualitypeacepainter @multplelifes @kokotaru

#timinette #timari #marinette dupain cheng #ladybug #red robin #tim drake #satisfied #maribat

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karimac · 3 years

Text

...in the details, Part 2

A/N: Warning for this series: 18+ audience (minors DNI), some cinematic level violence, some fluff and angst. Doubt that smut will be involved, but it may be implied. I’ll make sure that is noted clearly if it pops up.

All relationships, at this point anyway, are platonic.

Please do not repost or translate my work. Likes, comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated.

A bit about the OC Kari

Part 1

All mistakes are my own.

Word count: 2,249

Before you ventured into Westview, a flight of birds overhead reminded you of Redwing and Sam. Poor Sam. That sixth sense you had told you that fight at the compound was going to lead you all into very weird places. And the first one left you very squarely not in the room once again.

This time it was Steve and Bucky being thick as thieves, and you and Sam were…making a sandwich run? Couldn’t exactly get GrubHub to make a delivery to an attack site, could you? Bruce did not want some driver with a cellphone putting video up on Snapchat. “How would that look?” he bemoaned as he worked on the time travel platform. “We’d be getting tourists left and right. I don’t need that.” So off you and Sam went.

“You know, you could just, you know,” Sam started to say as he waved his hands like he thought a wizard would do, “and just poof up a plate of stuff. Right? With extra food for Banner, of course. He inhales tacos like nobody’s business. Just ask Tic Tac.”

“Sam, what have I told all of you before? Magic is the transfer of energy and matter. No suitable food stuff means no sandwiches. I can’t just think about the deli counter at Wegman’s and make a sandwich and a side of coleslaw appear in my hand. So, we’ll order on the app and pick it up. Just like everyone else. Before I hit the button, any changes to your order?”

“No, it’s fine. But don’t tell me you’ve never done shit like that when you’ve had your back against it,” Falcon huffed as you went to the rental car you’d gotten earlier in the day. That, thank Heaven, was easy to get at the local but extremely small airport.

“I’ve killed small rodents and eaten them, and I don’t mean just rabbits. Snakes, too. And, well, birds of prey, like falcons,” you groaned as you started to get into the car, but you stopped and headed back to the passenger side. “And I know you hate my driving, so here you go,” you said as you handed Sam the keys. “Sorry it isn’t a Ferrari. I was lucky to get this Kia. They didn’t exactly have anything race course worthy.”

As Sam climbed in, he saw bags of gear in the back seat. “You pulling a Wanda? Need some me time away from all us testosterone jockeys? Cyborg is going to be pissed.”

“Bucky has other stuff to deal with, trust me,” you said as you rolled your eyes. “He does not need to add Crazy Old Broad to his growing list of things to do and people to take care of this week. I heard him talking to Steve…”

“You? Eavesdropping? You are human!” Sam smirked, but then he saw the comment had hit a nerve. “You know I was kidding, right?”

“I know you are,” you said as you swallowed hard. In reality, you were not exactly buying that last comment. Sam was a sweetheart, but his comment sounded like things Tony and Steve had said about you in the weeks before the Time Heist. It depended on the situation, but one or the other of them seemed to question you, your motives, your powers and what they could do, and, at times, your grasp on reality. You did have a connection to a goddess they couldn’t see. Blaming them for having those questions just was not in your wheelhouse. “And yeah, maybe I just need to go figure a few things out. You guys know how to get me back here if you need me.”

“Somehow I don’t think Steve, Bucky and I would look so great standing and screaming your name in the middle of a fight,” Sam noted as he finally turned the key in the ignition.

“Now who is having issues with gender roles?” you said with a very pronounced side glance. “Sam, we are all human. We all need a save now and then. Maybe you’ll never have to utter my name again after today, unless you guys can’t find something you think I hid? Thor will be back once he’s done exploring the universe, and you can always get him here fast if you have Strange find him. And Wong is just dying for his shot as a full time Avenger. We all know that! And I can go back and do, well, goddess stuff, I guess. And raise horses. Just, please, make sure no one drops the ball on Parker. He lost his parents and his uncle. Losing Tony will hit him harder than anyone likely expects. He’s a good kid. He just needs support and guidance. Now, want to get this thing moving, or do you want me to drive?”

“And have you antagonize the local cops by going Mach 1? No thank you!”

You had to laugh at that one. You did tend to floor it. A lot.

++++++++++

A short time later, you and Sam rolled back to the site Bruce had chosen to set up the time travel platform. After you two handed out all the food, you realized it was really time for you to get going. No, you didn’t have a train, plane or bus to catch or someone to meet. You just knew it was going to get harder to make the break the longer you stayed there.

“She’s pulling a Wanda on us,” Sam said as he finished off the last of the sweet tea he had grabbed at the deli where you’d gotten food. “I think it’s too much he-man macho stuff, but she won’t fess up to that.”

“Wilson, how many brothers did I have?” you asked as you cleaned up the trash from the table Bruce had borrowed from a local park that had been wrecked during the battle. It had a huge hole in the end, but hey, it was good enough for the moment.

“Eight,” Bucky replied before Sam got the chance. “Just don’t quiz me on all their names. I remember your twin, Branan, and the one who was the vampire. Ewan? Right?”

��Yup, that’s right,” you grinned at Buck. “And no quiz. Promise,” you said as you raised your left hand and crossed your heart with your right.

“Why are you leaving?” Bruce asked as he adjusted the sling on his still injured arm, putting extra emphasis on the word “are” as he uttered it. “We need all the help we can get.”

Bruce, heaven help him, was suddenly one of the last active OG Avengers standing on Earth. Thor was off finding himself with the Guardians, and no one could really begrudge him that. He needed time to heal, and you knew all too well that was not easy nor time limited. Clint had more or less retired again after Natasha’s sacrifice on Vormir. Steve was getting ready to take the stones back, but upon his return, he’d likely join up with Sam and Bucky again to root out any remaining Hydra cells. That left Bruce in a very different place this time around.

“Bruce, you don’t really need me being a head case. Trust me. You do not need me giving any news outlets ammunition to blast headlines that make the team look less than spotless. I need to go home, at least for a little while,” you replied, knowing full well you were not telling him or the others everything. “And as I reminded Sam, you guys can just call me, and I’ll be here. Just whisper my name. Or yell it. Whatever works. Text me! If it’s an emergency, and if I’m not in the middle of some new damned war on my end, I’ll come running. But I have a feeling you guys are going to be just fine. Hell, I’ll give you a blessing before I head out.”

Yeah. A blessing. More like the final nail in the coffin. The words to start the spell to make them forget you.

“Big guy, you first,” you said as you put your hands on Bruce’s injured right arm. “And no, I am doing this, Bruce. It won’t be a full healing, but it should speed things up. You got this, big guy. Biggest brain. Biggest heart. May you realize just how much this team was built with your sweat and tears as it was anyone else’s.”

“I can’t change your mind?” Bruce asked as he pretended to wipe a tear from his eye and pout a bit. “And I am not asking because you are likely the only one of us who can cook…”

“I’m pretty sure all of you guys can cook something. Maybe not a good Colcannon or a fine Dublin coddle, but you’ll survive. As for the cupcakes, you guys may need to get a bakery on speed dial,” you added with a laugh because you knew they’d make that bakery rich. The Avengers loved their sugary snacks.

“Just don’t bug my sister, Bruce,” Sam noted as he waited for you to come over to him. “I still remember asking why the Cupcake Lady had a sword that night when those demon things attacked near the tower. I never asked. Why the cupcakes?”

“And not why the demons or the sword?” you said as you nearly choked on your words. “You realize that was before Steve saw me at Peggy’s funeral. That night was truly a fluke, Sam. No one was supposed to see that side of me then. As for the cupcakes, they were my entry to your world. Gifts from a fan girl. They’re easy to carry, a synch to personalize when needed, and everyone can have their own without fighting,” you said with a grin as Sam shook his head. “What?”

“You sound like Sarah.”

“Then I am in good company. Tell her the good stuff you’ve told me all these years. The words of wisdom. The little jokes. The pep talks. Tell her often. A single mom with two boys needs that. Be there for her, and drag these guys to see her, too. It would do the boys a world of good to have all their uncles stop by. Now, Samuel,” you said as you gave him a hug, “remember to keep these guys flying right. And if the world drops opportunity in your lap, whatever it might be, do not look at it and push it away without a lot of thought. The world needs Sam Wilson, the hero with a heart.”

And now the hardest part of this good bye had you wiping tears from your eyes. “I know. I’m a big mush. Girls from Brooklyn would laugh at me for this, right? Sorry, but girls from Naas and Athy do cry sometimes. I’m going to miss you two lugs. A lot.”

“Lugs. Last time you called us that was in ’43,” Bucky said as he looked down at his feet for a minute. “Somehow Hydra missed that memory.”

“You’ll see us again,” Steve said as he turned briefly to see where the case with the stones was on the platform. “But this time, it better not take 70 years.”

As you looked at the best friends, something about their auras seemed off. They had been planning something when you almost walked in on their chat a few days ago. You had no idea what it was, and you suddenly didn’t want to hang around to find out what the next act was going to bring.

“Just…watch your back, Steve. From what Clint said about Vormir, that one is going to be tough. And Buck, whatever comes next, I’m rooting for you. Even if you can’t see me doing it.”

“You really don’t have to leave,” Bruce kept insisting as you hefted your backpack on your shoulder.

“Dr. Banner, do you really want to fight my demons after all this? I have enemies. You just haven’t seen them yet. Frankly, the only reason that Hydra didn’t grab me before I hooked up with the Howling Commandos was because I was pulled into another dimension by one of those enemies. It was only by some weird twist of fate that Peggy found me when she did. If the veil between worlds had not been so thin near that camp, I might never have made it back, or Hydra might have found me first. It was pure dumb luck.”

{{And, Heaven help me, part of it was these two lugs over here}} you thought as you turned to head to your car. Then you stopped. This was a lot harder than it had been any time before, but it was the curse of an immortal to have to keep moving on. “I wish you luck, joy and happiness. I wish you peace. And, if you are truly lucky, memories long enough to have little space to spare for the likes of me because they are filled with so much more! See you in my dreams, for now anyway, fellas.”

++++++++++

You rolled out of there before Steve started his mission to return the stones, and you got a text from Bruce hours later telling you everything that had happened. Steve not coming back as planned. Then an older version of Steve shows up, sitting on a bench near the platform, and he gives Sam the shield. Right in front of Bucky.

It was now weeks later. No. It was months later, and here you were staring up at the sign for Westview. You’d gotten out of your rental car so you could get a feeling for the area around this little town.

“You made it back,” a voice said behind you. “How are you, after all that mess with Wanda and that Agatha woman? She was a real piece of work.”

The person speaking to you was Dr. Darcy Lewis. Friend of Thor and Dr. Jane Foster. Why was she even here?

You couldn’t fully figure out what the hell she was talking about. You didn’t remember being here before. Yet, you knew who she was, and you had never met her before. Or at least you couldn’t remember meeting her, here or anywhere else.

“Apparently not as great as I thought I was,” you muttered as you winced again. “Dr. Lewis, how long ago was the blip?”

“Give or take a week, about six months ago,” she replied as you started to pace. “Why?”

“Shit. Not this again,” you hissed as you looked up at the sign once more. “I think I’m going to need your help. How much do you know about Celtic myths and Irish history, Dr. Lewis?”

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