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missnxthingg · 4 years

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𝕗𝕝𝕒𝕨𝕝𝕖𝕤𝕤 • 𝕗𝕠𝕦𝕣

SUMMARY: (Y/N) gets offered to make her childhood dream come true, even though her mother keeps making her annoyed. Tom starts feeling some new things which he never felt before, and can’t even name it.

Based on my one-shot, Flawless.

PAIRING: Rich!Tom Holland x Rich!Reader (Best Friends to Lovers AU)

WORDS: 6.3K

WARNINGS: Swearing, underage drinking and FLUFF

A/N: I just wanted to say that’s it’s a short one, but it’s SO CUTE. I love it! AND ITALICS ARE TOM’S THOUGHTS.

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𝕗𝕠𝕦𝕣 • 𝕧𝕠𝕘𝕦𝕖

Josephine’s office on Midtown Manhattan had a great view of New York’s skyline, and it was beautiful during the afternoon when the sky was orange, almost like a golden glow covered the whole city. (Y/N)’s small office could barely fit two people at the same time, but it had the most incredible view of Central Park, glowing with the afternoon sun. Sometimes she would just pop up in her mother’s office to close her door, prepare some coffee, put on some soft music and sit there watching the park. When she had work to do, it wasn’t so bad with one of those views.

Fashion work was hard. (Y/N) would watch people go crazy every time they had a big event coming and this time it was Vogue’s cover and big interview with her mother’s brand. People were freaking out to put up with some looks, trying to contact models and makeup artists. Josephine even had her daughter back in the office to help her with reaching people and even sewing last-minute outfits. And right now she was leaning back on her chair, legs resting over the table as she sipped her coffee and tried to contact models for work.

“Everything is a disaster.” Josephine said as she came into her office, slamming the door behind her. “I just need a second of quietness.”

“Do you want some coffee? Maybe tea?”

“Chamomile, please.” Her mother breathed out, and she laughed, getting up to her small coffee station on the back of her office to prepare some tea for her mother. “Your outfit looks cute.”

“Thanks.” (Y/N) glanced down to her body and chuckled. Today she went for yellow plaid high waisted pants, a simple black shirt and heels. Josie always taught her how to dress up fancy but straightforward during office times. She approached her mother, who was now sitting on her chair, and gave her some tea.

“Thank you, sweetie. I just can’t be out there any longer. They’re driving me insane.”

For the past week, Josie was too busy to pick on everything her daughter was doing. That’s why their relationship wasn’t conflictual for the past days. She even came home for dinner more than one time, and maybe she was too tired of work to go to a restaurant and talk even more about fashion with some coworker or fashion journalist.

“I got Taylor Hill and Bella Hadid to model for us.”

“I got Naomi Campbell for cover.” She said, and (Y/N)’s eyes widened.

“Oh my God, are you serious?”

“And then she cancelled.” (Y/N) rolled her eyes and leaned back at her desk, watching her mother dramatically drink her tea. “We have a week to find someone else to cover the spot.”

“Go with Bella Hadid.” She suggested, and Josie groaned.

“If I get Bella for cover, I have to find another model to cover her spot.” She finished her tea and glanced up to her daughter. It was like something clicked on her head. (Y/N) frowned as she watched her mother get up her seat and smirk.

“What are you thinking?”

“You could model for me.” Josie said as she pointed her index finger to her daughter, and (Y/N) chuckled.

“Are you serious?”

“Dead serious. You look gorgeous wearing the collection.” Josie unlocked her phone and showed her a picture where she was wearing one of Josie’s designs. “So, what do you think?”

“Are you kidding me? Of course I want to do this. Vogue fucking Magazine.”

“Good, so I’ll need you here Friday after class so we can take pictures. Come without makeup and something simple to take off.”

“I’ll be here.”

Even though she said she wouldn’t involve herself with the fashion world, (Y/N) has been reading Vogue ever since she was a little girl. She always imagined herself as one of the girls looking all pretty and displaying beautiful clothes for the public. Now she has the opportunity to do it, and she wouldn’t let it go to waste. When she told Tom, he got very happy for her.

“It’s good to see you happy for the first time since I met you.” Tom said, and she jumped excitedly, making him chuckle.

“Vogue, let your body move to the music.” She sang as she danced awkwardly in excitement. She has catwalked to that song with her mother’s clothes for years, and now she could listen to it while modelling for the magazine she loved for years.

“Do you want me to drive you there?” Tom asked, and she shook her head.

“Mum will send me someone to pick me up, as always.”

Tom was happy to see her excited and getting along with her mother. The week that followed Noel’s party, she looked really down and she wanted more than anything to be alone. Tom didn’t let it happen though. He knew that she was upset about her father and now one of her friends was slut-shaming her for sleeping with Noel. As she said before, she permitted Stacie to be with Noel at that party but ended up with him instead, which resulted on Stacie screaming at her in front of the whole school and Courtney being quiet about the whole thing, deciding not to pick sides. The thing was that (Y/N) wasn’t upset about Stacie, only about the way she acted and exposed her, but she was upset with Courtney, because she meant a lot to her.

He tried to do everything to cheer her up after what happened, but it appeared that her home life was much better than before. Her father met her for dinner one night, her mother backed down and left her alone, even had dinner at home to be with her daughter. So all he did was be there for her. The day he headed back to the city with her was one of her lowest points, and he stood by her side the whole day, even went to brunch with her. Now he was glad that she had a big smile on her face.

When (Y/N) got to her mother’s office, makeup artists attacked her and started to produce her face. She didn’t even have the time to drink some water or do anything at all. It didn’t matter, because once they finished, she could see how gorgeous she looked. Soon she was wearing a mint green suit in front of a white background, waiting for the photographer, who seemed to be late.

“Where the fuck is he?” She whispered to herself as she rechecked her Instagram, meeting with the same pictures.

“Excuse me, I’m sorry I’m late.” A man said from behind her, probably the photographer. She turned around to meet the man she was going to spend the whole afternoon with, and her smile died when she saw who it was.

“Garold?”

“You can call me Gary, sweetheart.” She groaned and rolled her eyes as he smiled at her.

“You’re a photographer?”

“Yeah, I’ve been working for Vogue over a decade now.” Her eyes widened, and she ran out of the room, directly into her mother’s office. She was too busy writing something on a bunch of paper.

“You’re fucking kidding me, right? Garold, as my photographer?”

“I thought you might feel more comfortable with someone from the family.”

“Mom, for the thousandth time. Garold is not my family. He’s the guy you’re fucking with.” Josie rolled her eyes and stood up to sit in front of her daughter. “He’s not my dad, and you know that.”

“Just give him a chance. He’s a nice guy.”

“He literally flirted with me when I found him half-naked in our kitchen.” She groaned, a little disgusted to remember that situation. “Fuck this. I’m out of here. Call me when you get a new photographer.”

(...)

“Wow, that was really good.” Tom congratulated his father after he got his ball inside the hole on the floor, and he had a big smirk coming his son’s way. “I’m impressed.”

“Thank you, son. Better watch your back, because I’m coming for you.” Dom winked, and Tom chuckled.

His family finally found a good golf club in New York and decided to have a day off to hang out together. Nikki and Paddy were being taught by Harry, messing up their moves every time, getting Harry angry and Sam laughing in the background. Tom, Harrison and Dom were playing by themselves until Harrison got tired and went back to sit with Sam and eat something. The only thing they were missing was the beer. Being an 18-year-old British guy in America was hard, but at least the chips were good.

“Mom, you’re doing great.” Tom shouted and received a death glare from Harry, and a big smile from Nikki.

“Thank you, love. Harry doesn’t think so.” Nikki looked back to her son, and he rolled his eyes.

“Let’s just take a break. I need to calm down.” Harry rubbed his face and made everyone laugh. He sat next to Sam and tapped the back of his head so he could stop laughing.

“Totally worth it.” Sam laughed, and now all the boys were gathered together to watch Dom helping Nikki and Paddy since Harry was too pissed to do so.

“Short temper.” Harrison mocked.

“Dickhead.” Harry replied, making Harrison shrug. “So, you never told us about your party on Long Island.”

“Well, we both got very drunk. Oh, and (Y/N) set us both with some girls.” Harrison started. “Yeah, I got luckier than Tom, I spent the whole day after with the girl back in her room. Only headed back to the city at the end of the afternoon.”

“What happened Tom?”

“Uhm, mine went away when we woke up, and I headed back to the city with (Y/N).” He took a sip of his coke and shrugged. “She was, uhm…” He cleared his throat. ”Not okay, so I spent the whole day with her at Central Park.”

“Yeah, you’re definitely going to date.” Sam said, and all the boys agreed.

“Shut up, can I continue?” Tom asked, and all the boys nodded. “I was upset too. She slept with that idiot just because she was feeling lonely. She could’ve come to me so we could talk, but she prefered to run into his arms.”

“Have you talked to her about it?” Sam asked, and Tom shook his head no. “You need to talk about it.”

“We have nothing to talk about. Plus, we’re good. And she seems happy.” The twin glanced at Harrison, and the boy shrugged.

“She seems cool.” He shoved some chips in his mouth. “(Y/N) is cool, you know? I think we’re getting closer and I really like her.”

And there it was - the smallest, single tingle of jealousy inside Tom’s chest. He never felt it before, so he frowned when these feelings surfaced and took a grip of his heart. He clenched his jaw and looked down to hide his face. Was he jealous that Harrison was getting closer to (Y/N)? It couldn’t be. Why would he be jealous anyway, it’s not like he’s in love with her. Maybe he’s just jealous because he finally found someone so dear and close to his heart, that the thought of sharing it with someone else was too much for him.

“Yeah, but she is Tom’s girl. Right?” Harrison finished, and the boys started teasing Tom again.

“For fuck’s sake…” Tom groaned and quickly shot up to get away from them. Also, he didn’t want them to see the small smile that formed on his lips.

He couldn’t help but wonder how things would be if she joined them for a golf day. Would she know how to play, or would he have to teach her? Would she get along with his mother? Would she be so close to Harrison that it made his heart strangely tingle again? There were so many possibilities of what could have happened, but over everything, he wishes she was here. But he knew that she was very happy wherever she was right now because it was something she dreamed for a very long time.

It was strange because he never thought about any of those things before. He doesn’t stick around girls long enough to even feel anything. So why he was holding on to her like that and why the hell he couldn’t wait to see her again? Was it love? Tom wouldn’t know. The only kind of love he ever felt was towards his family and friends. But the romantic kind of love, he never even slightly felt it. No, that couldn’t be it - he thought, still not trusting his own words.

And just like magic, his phone rang. It was like his mind called for her and she only made the dial. ‘Maybe we’re more connected than I thought’. He walked away from his family to answer the phone privately. Why the hell was she calling him when she was supposed to be busy with the photo shoot?

“Hello?” Tom asked when he answered, and she sighed in relief.

“Tom. Thank God!” Her voice echoed through the phone.

“Are you okay?” He asked. Her breathing changed again like she was infuriated.

“I fucking hate my mother.” She admitted.

“Don’t say that.”

“Anyway, I’m at my apartment, packing to leave for my dad’s. But I was wondering if we could meet later; I need a drink.”

“Sure, you wanna go to Vertigo’s?” He asked and she groaned.

“I don’t wanna leave the apartment. Just come over, my dad will be out. And bring Harrison.” Why did he need to bring Harrison? Did you actually want to see Haz, using him only as an excuse to bring his best friend over? Would he be the third wheel? “I need as many people as possible to distract me. But I’m pissed at Courtney, so he will do.”

“Oh, okay.” A small smile crept on his lips, and he made sure it was unnoticed by anyone else. “I’ll be there. Text me the address.”

“Okay, bye.”

“Bye.”

(...)

(Y/N) waited for her father in the lobby as she frenetically tapped her fingernails on her suitcase, ignoring the stares as people passed through her. After all, people on her building were very curious, especially about her family. She prayed that her dad would get there before her mother, so when she saw him coming through the front door, she sighed in relief.

“Sweetheart. You called me?”

“Dad. Oh, thank God.” (Y/N) rushed to his embrace, and he hugged her very tightly. “Mom’s crazy.”

“Oh, I know that.” He chuckled. She leaned back and he pressed a kiss on her forehead. “Let me take you home and you can tell me everything about it. Okay?”

“Yeah, let’s go.”

(Y/N) told everything to her dad on their way home. She told him how loud her mother was on the first night she brought her new boyfriend home, how she was constantly pushing that strange man into her life and the boundaries they didn’t respect, like Garold standing half-naked on their kitchen. She finished with what happened earlier that day by the time they arrived at his building.

“Your mother makes me laugh until this very day.” He chuckled, making his daughter roll her eyes. “She’s really crazy. I’ll talk to her about it, tell her to back off.”

“I don’t think she’ll listen.” She admitted defeat and threw herself on the couch. “I’m just…” She sighed. “Tired of her bullshit. I don’t think she even cares about how I feel.”

“(Y/N/N), you know that’s not true.” He sat next to her, pulling her into a side hug, rubbing his hand on her arm. Vincent’s hugs always made her calm and feeling like she’s home. “You don’t remember that because you were too little, but I worked a lot, even more than I do now. Your mother was the one who was always home, even dropped work for a while, to take care of our little girl.”

“I thought she never wanted me. At least that’s what she says to me.”

“At first, she really did it because I wanted kids. But Josie couldn’t let go of her little girl. She loved you more than anything else and you were so precious. The first time you got sick, we had to take you to the hospital, she cried the whole time we were there and I needed to comfort her to stop crying. That night, you slept in her arms and she stayed up, holding you.”

“It’s hard to believe.” She chuckled, leaning back in her seat. She rubbed her eyes and sighed. “I wonder what happened to Josephine (Y/L/N).”

“Well, she stopped being Josie Rhodes to become Josephine (Y/L/N). The spotlight, runaway and fashionista Josephine.” She nodded and cuddle into her dad.

“I just wish we could get along.”

“Me too, sweetie.” He pressed a kiss on her temple. “But your mother is trying. I know our divorce was tough for her because I went through the same thing. We loved each other very much when we were teenagers, we still do. But we grew apart with time and unfortunately, things end; things change. Doesn’t mean there’s no love involved. She loves you very much, I promise you.”

“I just wish she could act like a real mother sometimes. And I miss our family.”

“I know you do, sweetie. But you have to be strong.” She nodded. “Things will never get back to what they used to be. I found someone who makes me feel loved again, doesn’t your mother deserve that?”

“I just don’t see honesty in Garold. He looks like he’s taking advantage of her. I think that’s why I don’t like him. I just wanna protect what’s left of our family.”

“Just give him a chance. Maybe he turns to be a decent guy. And if you still don’t feel comfortable with him around, you can always come to me.”

“You’re never home, dad.” She glanced down to the rings on her fingers and sighed as she played with them. Vincent’s heart crumbled and he pressed her even tighter against him.

“I know, and I’m so sorry. I can try to stay here more often, but work is hard.” She nodded. “Hey, you know what might cheer you up? Hot cocoa and helping me find an outfit for my date.”

“Yeah, you know how to cheer me up. I love you, daddy.”

“I love you too, sweetie.”

(...)

Later that day, Tom headed to (Y/N)’s dad apartment in Tribeca, humming to a song on the radio with Harrison. They had a long day at the golfing club, went home to shower and were now driving to meet the girl who called earlier for them. Tom spent the whole day thinking about her because she seemed angry and upset. But them again, when wasn’t she like that? It was tiring him, but he cared too much about her, so here he was, rushing to her apartment.

Also, he was still wondering what was that tingle on his gut when Harrison started to talk about his friendship with her. And the fact that she also wanted to see Haz tonight, instead of him alone. But Tom would be a fucking great actor because no one even noticed him distance during the rest of the day. Although, there was a moment he was pretty sure his mom knew, considering she came to hug him out of nowhere. It eased him though; she always knew how to ease him.

(Y/N) said they didn’t need to dress up when she texted to tell them the address. Harrison decided to go with joggers and a t-shirt, pretty basic. And Tom got the first sweats he saw on his closet but remembered to apply perfume - just because she said he always smelled nice when he was wearing that perfume - and rushed to get out of that apartment.

When she opened the door, the boys have never seen her so… raw. No makeup, hair tied up, barefoot and wearing a pajama with little avocados on the bottom, and a shirt that said: “Let’s avo-cuddle”. Tom found it adorable and a genuine smile crept on his lips. She was holding her phone between her shoulders and ear, a glass of whiskey on her hands. She signed the boys to follow her inside while she wasn’t finished.

“Sorry, boys. I was ordering pizza. Just make yourself comfortable.” She signed the couch and went to the kitchen.

Vincent’s apartment was pretty impressive and well decorated, with big windows and a great view of Manhattan’s skyline. Maybe too big for a single man who only had his daughter over once in a while. It wasn’t bigger than his old apartment from back when he was married, but it was big enough for the number of people that lived there. The boys sat and (Y/N) sat between them, handing both glasses of whiskey.

“I’m driving darling. Sorry.” Tom said and she nodded, pouring the liquid into her glass. “Wow, don’t you think that’s too much?”

“Don’t care.” She gulped her drink down. “I had a horrible day…”

She filled them in with all the details, starting with Garold, and ending up with her father’s confession. For Tom, it was just the two of them there, like he was the only one supposed to know what was happened. Reality crashed whenever Harrison spoke up, but he would ease every time her drunk hands rested on his legs. He wanted her to just rest her head on his chest and - No, stop it! Keep it together, Tom.

“To be honest, I don’t know why you’re so mad. He’s a photographer, so what?” Harrison started once she finished. “I know you don’t like him, but don’t let this opportunity go because of him. Being in Vogue is everyone’s dream, even mine.”

“Really? I didn’t know that.” He smirked as he nodded.

“I always wanted to be a model, appear in a big magazine.” He shrugged. “Just don’t waste your turn, darling.”

“Do you wanna do it with me? I’ll tell my mom I’ll only do it with you.” And there it was again, the tingle on Tom’s gut, the clench on his jaw.

“Are you serious?” Harrison’s eyes lighted up, making him sit on the edge of the couch.

“Yeah, of course! We can do it together, it will be fun.” She sounded excited, which only made Tom want to groan.

“Okay. I’ll not complain about it.” He shrugged. They kept talking about it and Tom just remained silent, trying to calm down and understand what was happening to him. They only ended the talk when the pizza arrived. “I’ll go get it. My treat.”

“Sure you don’t need help?”

“I got it, darling.” He said before slamming the door closed.

(Y/N) turned to Tom and smirked. He spaced out and wasn’t paying attention to their conversation by now. She giggled and pulled him into a side hug, pressing a big kiss on his cheek, which only made him smile. He melted into her again, like he always did. She had him on the palm of her hand, and she knew how to make him cave.

“You’ve been strangely quiet today.” She said, and he shrugged. “What’s up with you?”

“I’m just tired, that’s all.” She smiled softly, leaning back to show him her shirt.

“Can you read it out loud for me?” She pointed out the shirt, and he giggled.

“Let’s avo-cuddle.” He said, making her hug his middle in seconds.

“I thought you’d never ask.” She rested her head on his chest, and there it was, what he wanted to happen all night. Just the two of them, together, silently. He learned to enjoy that ever since she slept on his embrace during their trip back to Manhattan. Sometimes he would think about her snoring on his chest to help him fall asleep. A different tingle appeared for him, like billions of little butterflies flying on his stomach, which only made him smile wider. As an instinct, he pressed a kiss on top of her head, making her shift and bury her head on the crook of his neck. “Feeling better?”

“Much better.” She looked up to him and smiled. She got what she wanted; to make him happy. And he looked so damn cute with a grin on his face. She could stare at it for the rest of her life and never get tired of it.

Only when Harrison came back, she let go of him so they could eat and watch a movie together. But Tom didn’t feel the strange tingle on his guts. (Y/N) sat far away from Harrison, closer to Tom, and eventually, she’d brush her feet on his. The only thing the could feel was the billions of butterflies. He didn’t know what they meant, but he was liking it.

By the end of the movie, Harrison was asleep on the couch. (Y/N) didn’t have the heart to wake him up and just covered him with a blanket and lowered the lights. Tom cleaned their mess and started to wash the dishes for her, trying not to care about how nicely she was treating Harrison right now. But when she came to him in the kitchen and tiredly smiled at him, he forgot everything.

“Thank you for helping out. It really meant a lot to me that you were here to distract me.”

“Whenever you want, darling.”

“Do you think I’m overreacting with this situation?” She asked as she started to dry the dishes and put them away.

“A little, but it’s okay.” He shrugged. “You should give Garold a chance. I know he doesn’t look good, but your mother is a grown woman and knows what she’s doing. You need to stop getting those small things in your way of happiness.”

“Tom, to be honest, you’re the only thing that brings me joy now.”

“Don’t say that…” He shook his head.

“But you are!”

“I shouldn’t be, (Y/N).” He stopped washing the dishes and sighed. “I’m really glad that I can bring you joy because you bring it to me too. But I can’t be your only source of happiness, and it makes me really upset when I see you upset.”

“I didn’t know you felt that way.”

“Well, I do. Now you know.” She pulled him into a tight hug, with her hands softly resting on his hair. It took him a couple of seconds to understand what was going on, but soon he melted into the hug, pulling her by the waist. “It’s getting late, (Y/N).”

“Stay.” She whispered in his ear.

“What?”

“Please, stay. I don’t want you gone yet.” He nodded and she pressed a kiss on his neck, making electricity curse through his whole body. “C’mere, I’ll show you my room.”

“What about Harrison?”

“He’s gonna be fine. My dad won’t be back home tonight and the couch is pretty comfortable. I don’t wanna wake him.”

He nodded and quickly texted his mom about staying over. She entwined their fingers and pulled him to the bedroom, which was surprisingly simple, but he imagined it would be since she doesn’t spend much time there. She prepared the bed and lied under the covers. Tom stood there, waiting for her to invite him.

“Why are you standing there? Come lie with me.”

“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“You won’t. Only if you are uncomfortable.”

“N-no, I’m okay.” He sat in bed next to her and removed his shoes. Once he lied down, she found her way between his arms. His stomach pressed on her back and nose so close to her ears. The only thing he could hear was her soothing breathing while she was falling asleep in his arms again. He wishes he could hear her heart, though. Was it beating just as fast as his did? He couldn’t believe they were about to sleep in the same bed, especially in the position they were found right now.

“Good night, Tommy.”

“Good night, (Y/N).”

(...)

“Let me recap this. You’ll only do it if it’s with him?” Josephine pointed Harrison, who was standing next to Tom, right behind her.

(Y/N) knew her mother was desperate for new models. Ever since she gave up on the photoshoot, Josie had to spend full time at the office looking for new replacements and it’s been really hard for her to find last minute models to fill the blank. So it was the perfect opportunity to make her mother give in to her propose. That’s why they marched to her office to confront her after lunch on Saturday.

Tom had to say, he was fucking terrified of meeting her mother for the first time. He wanted her to like him, because his daughter was important to him, so it was a big deal. The night before that was amazing, especially the part after Harrison went to sleep and she involved him with her arms so they could sleep together. He spent the minutes before he fell asleep thinking how much he appreciated that single moment - and the girl holding him.

“Yes, mother. Take it or leave it.”

Josie stood up and marched her way to Harrison, who gulped loudly and started to shake, too nervous to have such an important person to the fashion world judging him. Whatever she would say next would define if he had even the slightest chance in the fashion world. With her glasses on the tip of her nose, she took a closer look at Harrison.

“You’re cute. Your eyes are pretty and we can actually work out with that.” She fixed her glasses and looked behind him. “Marcus, get him to make up and tell the dressing department to put him in the stripped leather jacket.” Her assistant nodded and (Y/N) encouraged Haz to follow the guy with a nod.

Josie watched him go away and glanced at Tom, who was quiet and wanting to throw up, only standing there to support his best friends. When her eyes fixated on him, he could just explode right there. Yeah, she’s judging me.

“And who are you?”

“I’m T-Tom. Tom Holland.” He replied, too nervous not to stutter.

“He’s my best friend, mom.” (Y/N) said and Josie nodded.

“And what are you doing here? Go get dressed, (Y/N/N)!” Josie said and her daughter nodded, disappearing through the door in the blink of an eye. Now he was alone with her mother. Great. “So, you’re my daughter’s best friend. You’re new in St. Jude?”

“Yes, ma’am. I just moved here from London and got an exchange scholarship.”

“Oh really?” She nodded, sitting back at her desk. “And you’re planning on using this opportunity to get into an Ivy League school, right? Or are you thinking about Cambridge and Oxford?”

“Actually, I want to be an actor. So I was thinking NYU or UCLA.” He said and her mouth fell agape.

“So, you think you can be friends with my daughter if you’re not planning to make something out of your life?”

“Excuse me?” Tom frowned, and Josie shrugged.

“I didn’t like your face from the moment you walked through that door. But I’m getting along with my daughter again, so I won’t say anything about it. Just be sure that I don’t approve your friendship.”

“I’m sorry, but are you only saying that because I don’t want to go to an Ivy League school and become a lawyer or something?”

“I’m only saying that because I don’t like your face.” She smiled, cynically. Tom rolled his eyes and shrugged.

“I can’t do anything about that. But I assure you that I’m a good person and I’ll always do whatever I can to make your daughter happy. I hope you realise that someday.” That was the last thing he said before waving goodbye and walking away from the office. “Fucking bitch.” He hissed. No wonder (Y/N) was getting into messed up fights with her mother.

He wanted to tell her everything, but when she walked out of the dressing room with a turtle neck red blouse, a leather jacket and light washed jeans, he got lost in his own words. She looked beautiful, even with that weird star make up they did on her. He blushed when she noticed him mesmerized by her.

“So, how do I look?”

“Flawless.” He replied, making her smile.

“Where’s Harrison?”

“I’m right here, darling.” Harrison was wearing almost the same outfit. The stripes on his leather jacket were the same colour as her makeup, her jeans were dark washed and he was wearing a simple white t-shirt. They looked like a couple matching outfits. Fucking great.

“Well, someone looks hot.” She winked at Harrison, making him chuckle.

“You think so?” He opened his jacket and turned around so they could have a full look. “I do look hot.”

“Come on, let’s kick some ass.”

(Y/N) went a few steps ahead and Harrison stood behind to talk to Tom for a little. His best friends said all the horrible things Josie said to him, making Haz curse the woman more than once. Tom asked him not to tell (Y/N) though, he didn’t want to ruin this opportunity again, which Harrison agreed. When they followed her into the studio, they found (Y/N) having a conversation with Garold.

“I know I was childish and selfish when I ran out of the studio that day. I’m gonna give you one chance Garold, that doesn’t mean you can cross the boundaries. So no naked walking around the apartment and try keeping it low in bed. Okay?” He gave her a nod. “I’m doing this for my mother, not because of you.”

“I know. Thank you, though.” He said and she nodded, getting into position for the photo shoot.

“Come on, Harrison. I’m gonna start without you.” She said as she fixed her hair for the camera. Harrison chuckled and joined her in front of the camera.

Tom sat in the back and watched his best mate take pictures with the girl. They seemed to be having a lot of fun and they had quite a way to modelling. They knew good positions and how to interact with the camera, and with each other. Tom couldn’t help but feel the tingles again. He didn’t want to feel it, he fought not to feel it, but they were there. When Harrison pulled her closer by the waist and she rested her head on the crook of his neck, he almost snapped.

This is stupid, he’s your best friend for fuck sake - Tom thought, and he wanted to cry for feeling that way. He shouldn’t feel it, there was nothing wrong going on. He was the one acting off and he needed to calm himself down. Luckily, someone served him some champagne and he had a couple of glasses, which did not help him. The only thing that helped was having the two models done with their photoshoot, after many changes of clothes and compromising pictures.

“And… we’re done.” Garold finished and (Y/N) groaned.

“Thank God! The heels are killing me.” She sat next to Tom and ripped them off in seconds. She was wearing the prettiest pink outfit, Tom’s favourite so far, which made him not want to tear his eyes away from her even for a second. Her heels were so big that her feet were screaming for freedom. “Uhm… I’m starving.”

“We can go get something to eat.”

“I was thinking Vertigo. They have burgers and booze.”

“Perfect.” He smiled and helped her get up to go change. She got back into her regular clothes and was waiting for Harrison to come back so they could all leave together when her mother called her from the end of the hall.

“Yes?” (Y/N) replied.

“I’ll see you back in the apartment tonight?” Josie asked, hope filling her chest.

“Tomorrow, I promise.” (Y/N) softly smiled at her, making Josie nod.

“We could have dinner together.”

“Can Tom come along?” (Y/N) asked, making both Josie and Tom stiffen. She still didn’t know what her mother thought about him. They shared looks and Tom silently waited for her response, which she only took a deep breath and forcedly smiled.

“Of course.” Josie practically vomited the words against her will. Tom was surprised but nodded in agreement. Maybe she was just trying to get along with her daughter.

“Thank you.” (Y/N) replied before pulling Tom to join Harrison at the lift. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

(...)

Harrison and Tom laughed at (Y/N)’s expression as she tried a Long Island Iced Tea for the first time. It was such a strong drink they all agreed to order and see if they liked it. The mixture of alcohol could be good or horrible for the one drinking it. Harrison liked it, Tom declined after two sips, but (Y/N) was having a hard time recovering from the small sip she took, her throat burning like hell.

“Yeah, fuck it!” She cursed. “Oliver, please bring me white wine. I’m done with this strong shit.”

“Weak.” Harrison mocked.

“You can finish it.” She passed it on to him, which he accepted.

“I’m gonna talk to the pretty girl over the bar. Don’t wait up.” Harrison winked and they waved him goodbye.

Tom was strangely quiet after the photoshoot, still thinking about her mother and what she said to him. Also, her proximity with Harrison was getting the best of him. He still hasn’t figured out why he was feeling that way, and it was wrong. (Y/N) noticed he was slightly off and nudged his shoulder before hugging his side. She gave him a sweet kiss on the cheek, which made him sincerely smile at the gesture, turning to kiss hers too.

“You’re very quiet. Something wrong?”

“Uhm, no… I’m just moody, I guess.”

“I know what can cheer you up.” She said and pulled his phone from over the table. “Let’s find you a pretty girl.”

“(Y/N)...”

“Shut up, I’m working.” She giggled as she went through his Instagram DMs. “Oh my God, I can’t believe you’re talking to Valentina Gonzales. We used to have play dates when our parents were close. She’s really pretty.”

“She’s not that into me, I guess.” Tom shrugged, and she chuckled.

“Liar. She even sent you sexy pictures.” She showed him some lingerie photos she sent him, making him laugh.

“Okay. Do your magic.”

She started to go through his DMs, talking to Valentina with her unique way to get people set up. As Tom glanced at her, he could only think that nothing else mattered. What her mother said, her proximity with Harrison, the fact that she’s setting him up with some random girl. The only thing that mattered was her, and she looked perfect under that light - or any light at all- and Tom couldn’t help but smile.

That week he discovered two feelings he had never felt before, not even once in his life. The first was jealousy, and he definitely didn’t enjoy what it felt like, but he couldn’t help it. The second one, well… He was still trying to figure out what it meant, maybe it was adoration or something similar. But one thing was sure, he only felt it when she was with him; like right now, when she leaned over to play with his fingers. Or the previous night when her soft hands held him to sleep. And this morning when she had a whole breakfast prepared for him. He wasn’t sure what it is, but he definitely likes it.

Fuck, what is happening to me?

❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁

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alj4890 · 4 years

Text

Kiss/Love Prompts

(Maxwell Beaumont x Nadia Park) with the prompt: A gentle kiss that quickly descends into passion, with little regard for what’s going on around them as requested by Anonymous. (Thomas Hunt x oc*Amanda) with the prompt: Staring at each other’s lips for a moment before moving closer, as if drawn together by some unseen force also requested by Anonymous. And the prompt: "I shouldn't be here." As requested by @krsnlove

(Maxwell x Nadia) (Thomas x Amanda) in a The Royal Heir/Red Carpet Diaries/Perfect Match crossover Fan Fiction

@lxaah11 @alleksa16 @penguininapinktuxedo @blackcoffee85 @stopforamoment @hopelessromantic1352 @krsnlove @annekebbphotography @hopelessromantic1352 . @sunflowergirl05 @desireepow-1986 @greywitchyshots @lilyofchoices @moodyvalentinestories @emceesynonymroll @my-heart-beats-for-ya @aworldoffandoms @ab1901 @lolablackwrites @flyawayboo @i-bloody-love-drake-walker . @trappedinfandoms @kate-mckenzie

A/N This isn’t a part of any particular AU, but the idea came to me while listening to one of my playlists and somehow this storyline came about, LOL. It will be a short miniseries because somehow it blossomed in size the more I went into it. I changed Nadia’s problems with Eros for this and made her and Rachel Hunt old college roommates. Without further ado, let's see if Thomas Hunt's sister, Rachel, knows what she is doing when she sets him up on a blind date. Maxwell also plans his hand at matchmaking once more. He was awfully successful with Riley and Liam. And what are plans without a few troublemakers in the mix?

Song: In My Dreams

Masterlist

part 2

A Not So Perfect Match (Part 1)

Upper East Side, New York, Friday the 12th...

"Rachel!" Nadia squealed before squeezing her surprise visitor in a tight hug.

"I've missed you too." Rachel patted her back. Her eyes widened at the top of her old friend’s once striking, jet black hair. “You colored your hair?!”

“Yeah.” Nadia pushed her now caramel hair back over her shoulders. “I needed a change.” Her brow furrowed with this unexpected visit. "What are you doing in New York?"

"I came to check on you." She replied. “You didn’t sound right when we last talked.”

The petite artist teared up some at the sweet gesture. "You shouldn't have come all this way. I'm fine."

"Nadia." Rachel grasped her friend's shoulders. "I lived with you for four years in college. I think after you comforted me during my crying jag over that moron, Nelson, who stood me up our freshman year, we are way past having to fake being fine."

Nadia's overly bright smile dimmed. "Thank God. I didn't think I could continue acting happy." Her eyebrows drew together with worry. "Not that I'm not thrilled to see you again, it's just..." She took a deep breath. "It's just that I'm tired."

Rachel waited silently for her to elaborate.

Nadia groaned, thoroughly disgusted with herself. "I know when we last talked, I told you about the Eros debacle."

"Yes." Rachel moved her hand in an impatient motion to get her to continue.

"Well, ever since Damien found out the dating service was actually for people who wanted to cheat on their significant others and that it had someone perfectly matched for me, I have been too scared to try dating again.."

"Why?"

"Because!" Nadia practically exploded off the couch. "Each guy I think is the one turns out to be my worst nightmare. They either cheat, or stalk me, or take my left shoes, or--"

"Whoa. Back up. Who took your left shoes?!" Rachel glanced down at her own footwear, wondering why a man would do such a thing.

"Evan." Nadia reminded her. "Remember? Junior year, he broke into our room and took two left shoes from my closet."

Rachel's eyes narrowed as she thought back. "I completely forgot about that."

"I wish I could." Nadia tilted her head for her friend to follow. "I've recently made a study of my bad boyfriends."

She led her into the second bedroom of her apartment. There was a large rolling bulletin board covered in pictures of various men. Multicolored strands of yarn went from one ex to another.

"Wow." Rachel stepped forward and read the notes written in glitter gel pens and such her friend had posted with each one. "Nadia, perhaps--"

"Look, I know it's crazy and I'm crazy for going through with making this." Nadia's eyes filled with tears. "I have to know why I'm a jerk magnet."

"You're not a jerk magnet." Rachel rolled her eyes. "You have simply had a run of bad luck."

"It isn't a run! It's years of this." Nadia pointed out.

The evidence on the board was damning. It did seem that somehow the jerks of the world latched on to Nadia.

"You need a change." Rachel decided. "Pack your bags. You're coming with me to California."

"What?" Nadia exclaimed. "Rachel, I can't just--"

"Yes, you can." Rachel went to Nadia's room and began to go through her clothes. "We will go shopping once there. But for the time being, these will do." She pulled out several outfits and laid them on the bed. "I'm going to introduce you to someone that I believe is perfect for you."

"Who?" Nadia asked. An excited trepidation overcame her.

Could the perfect guy be waiting for her in Hollywood?

"My brother." Rachel declared. "Like you, Thomas hasn't had the best of luck with dating." A smile slowly formed as she imagined one of her best friends marrying her only brother. And it would all be because of her brilliant matchmaking.

"Rach, I don't know." Nadia hedged. "Didn't you say he is," she hesitated, "kind of grumpy?"

"He definitely is." Rachel searched for a suitcase. "And that's why I think you would be perfect for him. He needs someone sweet."

"I'm not so sure it will work out. You said he has a quick temper. I do too and--"

"You both have an artistic temperament." Rachel pointed out. "While yours is on canvas, his is film." She continued to pack Nadia's bags. "I can't wait for you two to finally meet."

When she noticed her friend trying to think of a way out of going, she decided to use their new current obsession. They had spent numerous hours on the phone talking about their favorite book.

"Maxwell Beaumont is bringing everyone in The Royal Romance to Hollywood in a few days."

"What?!" Nadia squealed. "Do you think we could meet them?!"

"Tommy Phelps invited my brother to a party for the nobles." Rachel laughed when Nadia dramatically flopped on her bed. "I talked Thomas into taking me. If you come, he can take us both."

And then you'll fall in love with each other, she thought.

"Why didn't you lead with that?!" Nadia broke into a wide smile. “I would love to go to California."

******************

A private jet, a few hours east of Hollywood...

"Excited?" Maxwell asked.

"Sorry?" Amanda removed her ear buds. "Did you say something?"

"Are you excited?" Maxwell repeated.

"About going to Hollywood? Of course." Amanda slipped her ear buds back in, assuming the conversation over.

He yanked out the right one.

"I'm sorry, were you not finished?" She set her kindle down.

"Amanda, you're about to meet everyone who's playing your favorite people in the world!" He took her by her shoulders and playfully shook her. "How can you sit there calmly?"

She laughed at his antics. "I am curious who the director picked to play you."

"I'll give you a hint." His dimples deepened. "Your favorite actor is playing yours truly."

"No!" Amanda's eyes widened. "Are you saying that Ryan Summers is playing you? Ryan I am too handsome to be true Summers?"

He nodded, finally content at having worked her into an excited frenzy.

"I love his movies." Amanda sighed. "Any chance you added a hidden romance for you in the script?" Her lips curved in a teasing smile. "I would be willing to work for free to share a love scene or two with him."

"Oh really?" Maxwell teased. "I guess it's a good thing I told him that if he wanted to learn more about me, then he should spend time with you."

"Shut up!" Amanda hit his arm. "You didn't!? Did you?"

"I did." He winked at her. "Perhaps you can also get to know him."

Amanda fanned herself with her tablet. "I can't imagine talking to him much less spending time with him."

"Breathe." Maxwell repeated. "In and out."

"This is going to be the best trip ever." She declared.

***************

Hollywood, Sunday the 14th...

"Come in." Thomas yelled out when he heard the persistent knock.

Rachel opened the door to his apartment. "Busy?"

He finished packing a stack of books in a crate. "Only with getting the last of my things on the moving truck."

"Good thing I came ready to help.” Rachel rolled up her sleeves.

"Thank you." He handed her a box and motioned toward the awards case. "Bubble wrap is over there."

"This is it for the bathroom." Ryan came around the corner. "And I managed to-- Rachel!"

She smiled at him over her shoulder. "Hello Ryan."

His slow, suggestive smile that made his horde of fans shiver formed. "I didn't know you were stopping by. I would have dressed up."

Thomas eyed the two silently.

"I like to surprise my brother. Keeps him tethered to the real world." She teased.

Thomas did not bother to respond to her quip as he hefted a box downstairs.

Ryan set his own box down and helped Rachel reach one of the awards on a top shelf.

"I heard you were in New York." He helped her wrap one of the SAG Awards.

"I was."

He paused waiting on her to say why she went there.

She glanced up at him. "I went to talk a friend of mine into coming here for a visit."

"A friend, huh?" His smile grew at the thought of her having a secret love. "Is this a close friend?"

"Very close." Rachel replied.

"Really?" Ryan turned away from her and picked up a box to take downstairs.

"I think she is perfect for Thomas." Rachel added when he stepped out the door.

Ryan slowly backed up. "Who's perfect for Thomas?"

"My friend in New York. Nadia." She explained. "I intend to put them together."

Ryan thought about the numerous ways this could end badly for all parties involved yet wisely kept it to himself. "When do I get to meet her?"

"You don't. Not until she meets Thomas." Rachel's nose crinkled. "You're too handsome."

His brow furrowed. "And this is bad?"

"Yes." Rachel faced him with her hands on her hips. "I can't tell you how many women have told me that you blind everyone with your looks and charm. I need Nadia to truly see Thomas. Once that is done, then you can meet her."

Ryan casually leaned against the doorframe. "Do I blind you?"

She rolled her eyes. "Not at all. I'm immune to the charms of actors and models. One of the perks to having Thomas as a brother." She cut her eyes to him. "Why do you ask?"

"Just curious." He winked at her and said over his shoulder. "I like to know who will let me get away with anything by just flashing a smile."

She shook her head in exasperation while packing the rest of Thomas' awards away.

Her brother returned, frowning slightly at the few items that were left.

"Thomas?"

"Hmm?"

"Moving into your home seems like a new beginning, doesn't it?" She asked, attempting to sound innocent.

Perhaps a little too innocently.

His eyes narrowed. "What are you getting at?"

"Nothing." She kept her back to him. "Just that life itself can change when one moves out of their comfort zone."

"I'm moving to a home I personally designed as my comfort zone." He grumbled.

She grit her teeth at how obtuse he could be sometimes. "I meant that you will have a place where new memories can be made without the stigma of the old."

He stopped packing and folded his arms. "What new memories are you talking about?"

"Well," she shrugged a shoulder. "You'll be making new movies. Throwing parties--"

"I'm not throwing parties."

"New romance." She continued, pretending he had not interrupted.

"I'm not interested." He informed her.

"You will be when you meet the right person." She set the last of his awards in the box. "Thomas, you built a home with eight bedrooms."

"And?"

"And what better way to fill them than with a family!" She exclaimed.

"Rachel, I built those for visitors. Plus, I am using some of those rooms for--"

"When do you invite people to stay with you?" She snapped. "And don't you dare say you are using them for your movie paraphernalia."

Thomas ran his hands over his face. "Rachel, I appreciate your concern, but I am perfectly content as a bachelor. I don't have to worry about whether or not I am focusing on a relationship like I should when a new film comes my way. The unnecessary drama of trying to figure out how serious we should be or--"

"That's why I have the perfect person for you!"

His eyes widened. "What?"

"You mean, who." She smiled at him. "I found someone who understands getting swept away with artistic endeavors."

"Rachel, you are not setting me up with someone." He stated firmly.

"Yes, I am." She argued. "Nadia is the one for you."

"Nadia?" Thomas' frown firmed as he tried to recall how he knew that name. "Your old roommate? The one you claimed was deeply in love with love?"

"That was nearly ten years ago." Rachel waved her hand dismissively. "She's mellowed some."

"No." He snapped. "Thank you for what I assume is a loving gesture on your part, but I am not interested."

"You're meeting her Thursday night for dinner at La Boucherie ." Rachel informed him. "Then escorting us next Friday to The Royal Romance party." She hefted her box and walked out the door, yelling, "Don't even think of getting out of it!"

Ryan dodged her on his way back inside. "What's wrong with Rachel?"

"She set me up on a blind date." Thomas replied bitterly. "One I neither asked for nor wanted."

*****************

The Royal Romance movie set, Tuesday the 16th...

"Here's the ballroom where we have the big BOOM" Tommy Phelps moved his hands like a bomb blowing up.

"But the night when Liam was crowned King was when the photos happened." Riley pointed out. "Not the night when the Sons of the Earth attacked."

"Love how you're thinking." Tommy said. "But we thought fireworks exploding during that big reveal of you and Tariq would really hammer home how little control you had."

"That moment was fraught with turmoil." Liam argued. "I had to immediately come up with a way to keep Riley safe while also trying to find a way to be with her." He looked about the ballroom. "I don't think fireworks do justice to that heartbreaking moment."

He shifted his daughter in his arms when she grunted.

Riley slipped her arm around him. She alone knew how he still suffered from that one night's decision. To this day, he apologized for being unable to choose her in that moment.

While the director continued to discuss options with the royal couple, Maxwell led the others to meet their actors.

"And this is Ryan Summers, aka me." Maxwell cocked his head to the side as he studied the man. "It's like looking in a mirror."

"I don't think you know what a mirror is." Drake commented.

"See." Seth pointed out. "This is what I am talking about. I need to know how you use your snark when talking to others."

"I still can't believe they chose Seth Levine for Drake." Amanda whispered to Olivia. "He is nothing like him."

Olivia nodded before turning her attention to the actress cast as her. "They made the right choice for me. Victoria Fontaine is known for not taking crap from anyone."

The normally blonde beauty had her hair the exact shade of Olivia's rich red locks. She was in the midst of training with a pair of daggers.

"She's got potential." Olivia muttered. When she noticed Amanda's lack of comment, she turned to see what held her attention.

"Really Amanda?" She teased. "You're drooling."

She quickly touched the corner of her dry parted lips before scowling. "Look at him!" She whispered. "He's more handsome than I expected."

"I guess Ryan is not too hard on the eyes." Olivia conceded.

"Amanda!" Maxwell motioned for her to come over. "I need you to tell Ryan how wonderful I am."

She steeled herself and hoped she didn't succumb to giggling like an idiot when he spoke to her.

Ryan held his hand out. "So this is the other friend who only knew of circumstances through phone calls?"

"That's me." Amanda could feel her skin flush from her neck to the tips of her ears. "I was away caring for my late uncle during Liam's search."

Maxwell grinned at her hand remaining in Ryan's. "She was the voice of reason whenever I called in a panic. If anyone can tell you what I went through during my times alone, it is the duchess I would call at three in the morning for encouragement."

"You won’t mind my pestering you?" Ryan's smile flashed causing her cheeks to turn darker.

"Not at all." She replied, smiling shyly back.

"Sounds like you two could use that dinner reservation I won't be able to make." Maxwell interjected. "Perfect opportunity to talk about me."

"What?" Amanda turned abruptly toward him. Her hand slipped from Ryan's grasp.

"Thursday night, seven o'clock. My agent unfortunately scheduled a last-minute book signing for that night. " Maxwell quirked an eyebrow at Ryan. "Any chance you could take her to dinner at La Boucherie?"

"Maxwell--" her voice almost squeaked with embarrassment. "I... I’m sure Ryan has...we can't..."

"Sure." Ryan responded. "I'll come by and pick you up." He smiled once more at Amanda as he left the two to speak to Tommy.

She pinched Maxwell underneath his arm.

"Ow!" He rubbed the spot. "What was that for."

"Did you just set me up with Ryan Summers?" Amanda hissed.

"Are you asking if I concocted a plan to have one of my best friends go to a romantic dinner for two with the one actor she gasped over when he removed his shirt during a love scene?" He countered.

She dropped her head in her hands. "Maxwell!"

"You're welcome." His sing song voice taunted her as he left her alone.

****************

"Here you go Chris." Addison helped him into another jacket. "Better?" She asked when he moved his arms.

"Much better." He replied. "Thanks Addison."

She smiled and went to check on Cassandra's ballgown, pausing when she overheard one of the nobles talking about someone she knew well.

"I still think Thomas Hunt should have directed this." The dark-haired duchess muttered behind her cup.

"You sure it isn't your crush on him making you say that?" Asked the guy that was clearly best friends with the king.

Addison ducked behind a column to continue to eavesdrop. She peeked around it to see how the duchess looked when responding.

"Just because I've always found him attractive doesn't mean he isn't a talented director. When I think of all he could have done with this story--" she smacked the man's arm.

"Amanda, what was that for?!" He asked.

"You know what you were doing, Drake Walker." She wagged a finger at him. “I don’t make that expression whenever I talk about him.”

"Would you have been able to concentrate on the tour if Hunt was directing?" Drake teased.

Amanda's cheeks turned red. "I highly doubt it." She lowered her eyes. "I was secretly hoping we could still meet him." She looked around the set. "Seems unlikely now."

"You've got a few weeks to casually bump into him." Drake countered, nudging her side. "Just because you haven't seen him after a day or so in Hollywood, doesn't mean you won't."

Addison studied the noble closely. She might work for Thomas, she thought. Then the next words she overheard caused her to decide then and there to set Thomas up with this lady.

"I guess we better rejoin the others. Tommy probably has this whole soundstage rigged to blowup like every other movie he has directed." Amanda grumbled. "Would it kill him to stick to the heartache and romance of Liam and Riley's story?"

Addison quickly pulled her phone out and sent a quick text.

Holly. I found her.

*****************

Later that afternoon, The Beverly Wiltshire...

Nadia closed her eyes and sank deeper into the pool, sighing at how wonderful it felt. She tilted her head back, enjoying the sensation of the cool water mixed with the warmth of the sun.

She might have to visit California more often.

She sat up with a start, spluttering at the wave of water that crashed over her.

"I'm so sorry! You okay? I tripped and almost landed on you. It was either splashing you or drowning you."

She rubbed her eyes and blinked at the man nearly tripping over his words with the speed he was speaking. A pair of startling blue eyes were narrowed in concern at her silence.

Her lips parted at the face that slowly came into focus. The very face that graced the cover of the book she kept on her nightstand sheepishly smiled at her.

"I hope I didn't hurt you." He said, dimples deepening.

"I'm fine." She managed to say, smiling at him. "Besides, if I didn't want to get wet, I shouldn't have come to the pool."

His smile grew. "I've never understood people who want to just lay out by water. Who can resist how great it is to swim?"

"Exactly!" She exclaimed. "I'm usually the one having to drag my best friend into the water. He thinks he is too old to play in the pool."

Maxwell shook his head in sympathy. "It takes special people to be friends with such a person. We have to work so much harder to make sure they have fun."

"That's what I always say!" Nadia covered her mouth at how loud her words were. She was so excited to be talking to the Maxwell Beaumont that she lost all volume control.

He smiled and held his hand out. "I'm Maxwell by the way."

"I know." She bounced a little in the water with meeting him on her first day out. "I am your biggest fan! Well, me and Rachel are. I can't tell you how much I LOVE your book!"

Maxwell couldn't stop smiling. "I love meeting a fan."

Her bouncing began to make waves. "Fan hardly describes it. Not that I'm like obsessed with you or anything." She quickly amended. "I've had a stalker fan before. Not. Fun. At. All. Huge fan of your work is a little more appropriate."

His smile dimmed. "You had a stalker?" His eyes swept over her. "I wish I had Amanda here. She could tell me what movie I must have seen you in."

Nadia laughed and shook her head. "I doubt it. I've never done any acting. I'm an artist." She explained moving her hand as if it held a brush. "Paints and canvas."

He playfully wiped his brow in relief. "Thank goodness. I was about to call a doctor to check me over for a head injury if I had forgotten someone like you."

Her cheeks flushed. "I--that's so--thank you." She clasped her hands together to keep from fidgeting. "If you are ever in New York, you'll have to come by my gallery."

"New York huh?" His eyes held hers. "I should have known. After meeting Riley there, I've learned that amazing women come from that city."

Nadia thought she might melt right then and there.

He moved a little closer to her. "Nadia, I don't suppose--"

"Maxwell!" Hana called out. "There you are!" She sent a brief smile toward Nadia. "Sorry to interrupt but Tommy's been trying to get a hold of you. He needs to discuss another scene he thinks needs to be amped up."

"Be right there." His smile disappeared at having to leave. "It was nice meeting you Nadia."

"Best day ever." She replied.

He fought his grin. "Any chance you'll be staying in Hollywood for a while."

"A couple of weeks." She replied.

"Here? At the hotel?" He pushed himself out of the pool.

She became speechless at the sight of him shirtless and dripping wet. "Um. Hmm? Yeah."

He quickly dried off. "Then I hope to splash you again." He winked at her and hurried off.

She watched him until he went back inside before ducking under the water. She let out a squeal once under then popped back to the surface.

Nadia scrambled out of the pool and reached for her phone. "Rach? I JUST MET MAXWELL BEAUMONT!"

*****************

Later that night at The Ivy...

At a table for four out on the back patio, Holly waved to get her friend’s attention.

"Hey guys." Addison pulled a chair out and collapsed. "I needed this."

Steve chuckled at her actions. "Hard day?"

"Hard barely covers it." She grumbled. "With all the fireworks and explosions, I'm going to have to find flame retardant material to make ballgowns out of."

"Could be worse." Holly countered. "You could be helping Thomas move into his new home."

Steve grimaced at the reminder of his current assignment. "Or trying to draw up the right plans for his guest house." He rubbed his temple. "I somehow convinced myself that it would go easier after drawing up blueprints for his dream home." He downed his cocktail. "I've never been more wrong."

"He is a demanding, highly detailed man." Holly muttered. "Turns out great on film but is such a pain to work with."

"At least with Thomas, there aren't any surprises." Addison countered. "I'd willingly trade spots right now for a break from Tommy."

"Don't worry. You'll soon be back where you belong." Holly lifted her menu and grinned. "Tortured with the rest of us as we deal with Mr. Hunt's next vision."

"This is the last time I volunteer to work under Tommy." Addison swore.

Steve leaned closer and lifted a blonde lock of her hair. "Addison? Did you get burned?"

She glanced down and let out a shrill shriek. "MY HAIR!"

Holly coughed to cover her laughter. "I'm so sorry." Tears fell with her suppressed laughter. "I'm not laughing about what happened, just your reaction."

Addison dropped her head on the table with a loud thunk. "I need drinks."

"On it." Steve got their waiter's attention and ordered her favorite.

She sighed and resumed sitting up straight. "Thanks."

"Cheer up." Holly nudged her. "We can get your hair cut in a cute style before Matt gets back in town."

"I know." She mumbled.

Steve and Holly shared a glance at their friend’s unusual low spirits. "So tell us about this woman you found for Thomas."

Steve quirked an eyebrow. "I'm curious how you plan on getting them together. He's already trying to get out of one blind date."

"Blind date?" Addison narrowed her eyes. "But I found the perfect one! Who set him up?"

"Rachel." Holly explained. "With an old roommate of hers."

"She's an artist from New York." Steve added.

"No. Nope. She will not be his perfect match. The lady from Cordonia will." Addison argued. "And I think I know how to get them to meet. Is Thomas still planning on doing that sci-fi movie?"

"You know he is." Holly answered, wondering where she was going with this. "He's been taking his time with it during this move. Plans on focusing on it in a few weeks."

Addison pulled her phone out. "Don't judge me for this, but I took some pictures of the one I want for him."

Her friends studied the first image.

"She's pretty." Steve zoomed in on her face.

"I agree." Holly studied the next picture Addison had snapped.

"Look at her eyes." Addison pointed out.

The two were silent as they did as she said.

"Okay." Steve said slowly. "She has beautiful eyes."

"Oh." Holly blinked. "Oh, you're good."

"Right?!" Addison exclaimed.

"Am I missing something?" Steve asked.

"When are you doing this?" Holly asked. "How will you get her to do this?"

"I overheard her say she hoped to go on a tour of the studio. I thought I could offer to take her to Thomas's soundstage and," she scrunched her shoulders with anticipation, "watch the two fall in love."

"Hello?" Steve waved at them. "Guy over here that isn't fluent in Chang-Sinclaire-ese."

"Addison is going to pretend she's found the perfect person to play the female lead in Thomas's next film." Holly explained. "He has stated more than once that he believes he needs an actress with large, expressive eyes."

"Oh." He looked down at Amanda's face again. "You are good."

"Good enough to have you buy dinner for me?" Addison teased.

"I did just build a multimillion-dollar home." He pretended to think about it. "And you were singed on the job."

Addison clasped her hands together. "Think of my poor hair and how desperately it needs nutrients."

"I guess I could be talked into it." He smiled at her. "I do owe you both for recommending me to Thomas."

"Wait, you're paying for mine too?" Holly rose halfway out of her chair to search for their waiter. "I need to add to my order."

Once they had their entrees, Addison studied the two closely as they talked about their day. Feeling confident in her choice for Thomas, she began to wonder which individuals she could match them with.

#Thomas Hunt #maxwell beaumont #playchoices #choices the royal romance #choices red carpet diaries #choices the royal heir #trr maxwell #choices perfect match #pm nadia park #rcd thomas hunt #thomas hunt x oc #thomas hunt x amanda #maxwell x nadia #kiss prompts

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katahnisharma · 5 years

Text

the press tour [9] | t.h.

Word Count: 5.4 K

Warnings: lmaoo I cannot write choreography

Summary: You’re a new, inexperienced actress plucked from the obscurity of everyday life to play the lead in the reboot of a famous British Jane Austen novel, and Tom Holland just so happens to be playing your love interest.

A/N: Here it is, the Lip Sync Chapter, sorry it took so long! I may be taking a break next week because school is starting, but we’ll see. Also Tumblr apparently won’t let me link things so if you’re looking for my masterlist, playlist, taglist (closed), or writing challenge it’s in my bio ♡

“Y/N! Come on, get up!” Someone threw a pillow and it landed on your head. You startled awake, groaning when the curtains were pulled back. Bailey was standing by your bed, ripping the covers from your body. You winced at the contact with the cool air, and nearly screamed when you realized there were multiple people standing in your bedroom.

“Oh my god! Why are there people in my room?” You squeaked, drawing the covers up to your chest self consciously. You were wearing clothes, but you suddenly felt very naked. Bailey sighed, sitting down next to you.

“Y/N, it’s Lip Sync Battle day. D-day remember?” She said, and then it dawned on you. Today was the day. Your eyes widened, as you remembered the million things you needed to do.

“Crap, I was supposed to get up early to get ready. What time is it, where are my clothes?” You sat up frantically, ignoring Bailey’s eyes rolling at you. The group of people were situated around the foot of your bed, assessing you and whispering to each other.

“That’s what they’re here for. They’re going to help you get ready, do your makeup and everything.” Bailey said, and one of the women came forward with your first outfit. It was a sparkly rainbow jumpsuit, with a pair of butterfly heels. You had been very careful to pick a pair of shoes that looked good but were also comfortable since you were going to be dancing for a while.

“Shall we start, ma’am?” The woman asked, signalling to her team to start unpacking their equipment. You nodded silently, not sure what else to say. The crew kicked into high gear, rushing around with cases of makeup and hair products. One woman brought out a short blonde wig and handed it to you. Bailey got up and patted your shoulder.

“I’ll wait outside. You’ve got three hours.”

Tom hadn’t slept a wink all night. He was preoccupied with thoughts of you. Everytime he tried to sleep, Tom began to dream of you. He’d wake up and then you were gone, as though it was a mirage. It was driving him mad.

“All good in here?” Harrison called, sticking his head into the room. Tom was putting on his flannel and his brown tassel jacket. Sure he looked ridiculous, but that was the point. Harrison wandered in and took a long look at Tom.

“Wow, that’s some outfit.” He snickered, feeling one of the tassels. Tom rolled his eyes, not in the mood to snap back. He was tired and upset from the events of yesterday. David almost couldn’t get him to stop crying, it was like once he started the waterworks wouldn’t stop. He felt so idiotic, sitting there pining for you when he was the one who had screwed it all up in the first place. And now there were pictures of Adrian in jewelry stores, and it made him nervous. Maybe he was buying a ring to propose, it wouldn’t be unheard of. Tom wanted to throw something at the wall, anything to relieve the pain.

All he wanted was you. But he couldn’t have you, and it was his own fault.

“Fuck off.” Tom growled, pushing past him. Harrison frowned, watching Tom disappear into the bathroom and come back with a cowboy hat. If it had been under different circumstances, Harrison would have laughed. But after seeing the way Tom was, he decided against it.

“Mate, what’s wrong?” He asked while Tom stared at himself in the mirror. Tom closed his eyes, trying to calm down. But then he saw you and he blinked them open. God, he just couldn’t escape you.

“Nothing. It’s fine,” Tom whispered, wiping away a stray tear. Harrison came to stand behind him, turning Tom around. His eyes were red and Harrison could see the bags under his eyes. He looked like hell, and Harrison knew why.

“When are you just going to ask her?” Harrison asked, and Tom stormed past him. He stuffed his phone in his pocket, ignoring Harrison completely.

“Can we just leave, we’re going to be late?” Tom said, grabbing his bag. Samual was waiting outside with the car, and he was a stickler for punctuality. But Harrison knew his best friend was going through something, and he was going to find out what.

“For God’s sake Tom, just tell her what you saw. Tell her how you feel, before Adrian decides to take the next step!” Harrison pleaded, and Tom whirled around. He was seeing red, not for his friend, but for himself. Harrison was right, it was all on him to fix this. But he didn’t know how.

“I can’t, Haz! What am I going to say? I was looking at your phone and I never told you? Or how about this whole thing with Zendaya is fake, a publicity stunt so that I can get over you? And look how that’s worked out, because I’m still in love with you and you’re dating someone else? It’s over! I had my chance and I blew it, she’ll never forgive me!” Tom shouted, chucking his bag at the wall. Harrison sighed, running a hand through his hair.

“Y/N deserves an explanation, whatever it is. You take her on a date, act cold, and then rebound with Zendaya? God knows what she must have thought, and I know she’s still upset because I’ve seen the tweets. You need to tell her something, I don’t care what it is. She’s my friend too.” Harrison finished, not really sure where all that had come from. He loved Tom, but he loved you too. It hurt him to see his best friends like this, when they should have all been together.

“Yeah, okay. I’ll talk to her today, after the show.” Tom said, and that was all he was going to say. Harrison followed him out of the house, trying to match his pace. But Tom was fast, wanting for the first time to get away from Harrison and his questions.

Because he was right. And that really bothered him.

“Well, I think you’re ready.” One of the makeup artists handed you a mirror, and you gasped.

Thank God Bailey had called them in, because there was no way you’d ever have been able to replicate anything close to this. Your skin was flawless, dusted with a light shade of pink glitter on your cheeks. Your eyelids were done in a blend of pink, scarlet, and orange, like a painted sunset. Thivya, the woman who did the majority of your makeup, had swatched your lips in a glinty soft pink, blended in with a bit of purple.

“Wow, it’s incredible! Thank you so much!” You squealed, tilting the mirror at different angles. With the sparkly jumpsuit and your butterfly heels, you definitely looked the part. For the first time in days, you began to feel much more confident. This was yours to win, you could feel it.

“All good in here?” Bailey asked, waltzing in with her clipboard. She stopped dead in her tracks, a whistle leaving her lips. You spun around, the sequins catching the light. The crew clapped a little, and Bailey took a video for your instagram.

“Ready to go?”

“Yeah, let’s go nail this thing!”

The stage was set, the lights were on, and you were sweating in your dressing room backstage. You had your crew with you, Bailey, Adrian, your mother whom you hadn’t seen in weeks, and it was the only thing keeping you sane. There were hundreds of people screaming your name not a hundred meters from you, and your nerves were kicking in.

“Hey, you’re going to do amazing.” Adrian said, taking your hand while you paced the room. You smiled at him, grateful for the support. You knew he had a project he was filming, and him coming to see you meant a lot. Your mother liked him too, which was obviously a plus. Bailey was talking to someone on the phone, waving her hands around like she was frazzled.

Which she was, but she’d never tell you that.

“Thanks, I’m just so nervous. I’ve never danced in front of so many people, not to mention the millions watching at home. And Tom was incredible last time, I don’t know how I’m going to compete with him.” You said, picking at your dress. Even now, you had no idea what songs he’d picked and it was making you frustrated. You had no idea what you were going up against.

“So? Tom may have won last time but there’s no guarantee he’ll do it again. You’ve been practicing for weeks, don’t sell yourself short.” Adrian replied, getting you to finally stop moving. Fidgeting was your defense mechanism, but you knew that if you wanted to do well you’d need to calm down. Your mother nodded, drinking her cup of coffee silently.

“He’s right, honey. You need to calm down, it’s going to be fine.” She said, putting the cup down. She crossed the room and came to stand in front of you. With a sigh, you melted into her arms, hugging her tightly. She still smelled like lavender, that perfume she’d worn since you were a kid.

“Y/N? Showtime, babe.” Bailey called, opening the door for you. Adrian gave you a hug, your mother joining in as you followed your assistant out the door and to the stage.

“Damn, that’s some outfit.” Zendaya laughed, dodging a water bottle Tom threw in her direction. Harrison chuckled too, stealing Tom’s cowboy hat and trying it on. As he had expected, the hat looked ridiculous on him too. Tom groaned, regretting asking his best friend and fake girlfriend to be his support group.

“Stop, you’re hurting my feelings.” He grumbled, taking the hat back and smoothing down his hair. Zendaya rolled her eyes, scrolling through her instagram as Harrison helped Tom with last minute adjustments. The actress looked up, a wicked smile on her face.

“Well, at least Lil Nas X will notice you this time. I mean, how could he not?” She giggled, taking a video for her story. Tom laughed, whirling around to flash a smile at the camera. Harrison was about to protest, saying that Lil Nas X was way too cool for Tom, when the door opened.

“Tom? You’re on in two minutes.” Samual said, poking his head in.

“Shit, how do I look?” Tom asked, feeling his old nerves return. He shouldn’t be this anxious, but he had no idea what you had planned. Sure, Tom had won the battle before, but everyone loves an underdog.

And you were a really pretty one.

“Stupid, but that was already a given.” Zendaya said, and Tom flipped her off. Harrison took a look and felt confident that Tom looked as good as he was going to.

“You’re fine, just go out there and do your best. And don’t forget to talk to Y/N after, I mean it. “ Harrison said, straightening the hat a little. Tom nodded, smoothing down his tan leather jacket. Zendaya looked up from her phone, suddenly interested in the conversation.

“What are you going to say?” she asked, looking confused.

“I’m going to apologize for everything, it wasn’t fair to her. I won’t tell her about this obviously, but she deserves an explanation.” Tom said, and Zendaya agreed. She liked you and knowing that the whole thing hurt you made her upset. You didn’t deserve that, nobody did.

“Good, I want us all to be friends. Y/N is sweet and good and I like her wayyyy more than you.” Zendaya said, returning back to her phone. Tom sighed, giving Harrison a pointed look.

“Everyone does apparently.”

You stood behind the curtain, your palms so sweaty you were glad you didn’t have to pole dance. Bailey stood next to you, talking to the coordinator to make sure everything was set up. You saw LL Cool J somewhere, but you were too nervous to say anything. Chrissy Teigen had already introduced herself, and after you had found your voice you introduced yourself too. She had apparently been following the press tour and thought you were adorable.

Which must count for something, since it’s Chrissy Teigen.

“You good?” Bailey asked, breaking you out of your reverie. You smiled and nodded, lying through your teeth. She smiled and waved over LL Cool J, who gave you an enthusiastic hug.

“How you doing, kid?” He asked, shaking your hand firmly. You told him you were excited to do this, which was only partially a lie. He wished you luck, and before you knew it he was gone and through the curtain. There was a partial silence, before you heard him tell the crowd to get ready for you and Tom.

“Hey.” You turned and realized Tom was standing next to you, wearing the most ridiculous outfit you’d ever seen. He looked at you and internally screamed. You looked so gorgeous, and all he wanted to do was fall on his knees and beg forgiveness. Momentarily you forgot to be mad at him and burst out laughing. He groaned as you fell on the floor, trying to cover your mouth.

“Oh. My. God. You look so stupid!” You giggled, wiping tears from your eyes. Tom smirked, trying not to laugh with you. You stood up, biting your lip to keep from making any more noise. Bailey was eyeing the two of you suspiciously, hoping you wouldn’t kill each other before the battle started.

“Shut up, it’s part of my dance. I’m supposed to be Lil Nas X.” He said, watching your jaw drop. If he was Lil Nas X, did that mean…….

“Wait, YOUR SONG IS OLD TOWN ROAD?!” You asked, and Tom went red. You almost had a heart attack, realizing that you had to go up against Tom dancing to Old Town Road. This whole thing could end up being a bloodbath.

“Yep, my trainer said it would be a good idea since it’s so popular. What are you supposed to be, a unicorn?” Tom asked, looking you up and down. You blushed, realizing that the jumpsuit was a little shorter than you thought.

“No, I’m Taylor Swift. I’m doing You Need To Calm Down.” You said, checking to make sure your heels hadn’t loosened. Tom silently cursed himself, Taylor Swift was always a crowd favorite. He was suddenly wondering if he might lose his title this time.

“What’s wrong, afraid to lose in front of your adoring fans?” You teased, watching Tom shake his head. You felt more confident now, and you were ready to be cocky. Tom snorted at your remark, forming a comeback.

“No, but I’d get as many people to comfort you when you do. Even the other guy, the one before Adrian.” Tom said, happy to get you squirming. You quirked an eyebrow, wondering what Tom meant.

“What do you mean other-?” The curtain opened before you could finish, and LL Cool J and Chrissy Teigen stood there motioning you forward. You plastered on a smile, walking out with Tom to center stage.

“Tom Holland and Y/N Y/L/N everyone!” The crowd cheered as Tom bowed and you curtsied. There were flashing lights everywhere, cameras taking photos of the two of you. It was almost too much, but then you remembered what you came here to do.

Bury this guy.

“So, who’d like to go first?” Chrissy asked, looking at the two of you. The crowd was silent, watching you and Tom. Tom smirked, gesturing to you.

“Ladies first.” He said, grinning as you rolled your eyes. LL Cool J handed you the microphone, and you cocked your head to the side. The crowd was hooting, but you weren’t going to let him get away so easily.

“Please, let’s see what you got. Unless you’re afraid I’ll upstage you?” You said, laughing when the crowd went wild. People were whistling and oohing, and Tom couldn’t help but chuckle. You looked so cute when you were being competitive.

“Fine, I’ll go first. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you.” He said, brushing past you and making goosebumps rise on your skin. You shivered and walked off to the side with LL Cool J and Chrissy, taking a stand while Tom got ready. Zendaya was behind you and you waved, which she returned. The place went dark and your breath hitched, not sure what Tom would do.

Then the backing track began to play, and the crowd went nuts.

There was Tom, dressed in his cowboy outfit and holding a lasso. You stifled a laugh, when the lights behind him burst on revealing his backup dancers dressed as horses. You could hear Harrison die behind you, and Adrian cheered next to you.

What a clown.

The crowd cheered as Tom tilted his hat, cracked the lasso, and sprung into his routine. It was insane, watching him dance. It was both amazing and the cringiest thing you’d ever seen. The audience was lapping it up, even you were enjoying it. The way he moved was hypnotic, and you caught yourself staring at his butt in chaps a few too many times.

What are you doing? Get a grip!

Your face flushed, realizing Adrian was standing next to you and holding your hand. Tom kept looking over at you two, his face falling slightly when he noticed how close you were. He was trying so hard to nail the routine, but he was getting distracted by you. One of the background dancers lifted him up and helped him crowd surf, throwing his hat into the crowd at a screaming fan. When he got back on the stage, Tom decided to do something on the spur of the moment.

He waltzed up to you, pulled you by the waist and brought you close to him. His eyes pierced through your own, and he looked down at your lips. For a moment, you both just stood there breathing softly, and then Tom smirked and was gone leaving you breathless. Adrian fumed behind you, but he put on a good show for the camera.

You on the other hand just stood there, like a deer in the headlights. The music was still playing, but it was like you couldn’t hear anything. You took a step back and locked eyes with Tom again, who grinned at you.

Did he plan this?

Tom strutted around the stage, eating up the audience’s reaction. But best of all, he got a rise out of you and he loved it. The look on your face, one of pure neediness made him feel cocky. Tom doubted Adrian could do that to you. And it made him feel something wicked.

With a swivel, Tom turned around and dropped to the floor, whipping his head back and forth to the music. He knew that he was doing well because the crowd was screaming, even more so than when he did “Umbrella”. With a final move Tom finished and took a bow. One look at you confirmed how nervous you were. Adrian noticed and put his arm around you protectively, glaring at Tom. He shouldn’t have been happy about it, but it was funny how much Adrian despised him. You blushed and looked away as Tom came over, stopping a foot in front of you. The cheers stopped and the room went silent, waiting for Tom to speak.

“Let’s see what you got.” Tom smirked, taking a bow and brushing past you slightly. The contact made goosebumps rise, and you tried to keep your focus. But it was so hard to do that when Tom was inches away from you, his gaze burning through your back. It suddenly became very hot, and you felt the heat rise to your cheeks again.

“Are you ready, Y/N?” LL Cool J asked and Adrian kissed your cheek. Before it would have made you smile, but it felt cold and strange. You nodded, waving to the crowd as you walked to the center of the stage, striking your beginning pose. The lights dimmed and the crowd’s noise lulled, and you began to sway back and forth.

3, 2, 1, Let’s go bitch!

The lights flashed on and you strutted to the front in sync with your backup dancers. The crowd went wild, screaming your name as you claimed your confidence again. It must have been the practices, because your routine was flawless and you’d never felt better. With a whip of your hair, you were off.

Swaying your hips, you ran a hand down your leg and whipped your head back up. Your backup dancers picked you up and spun you around, giving you a bit of air time as you landed on your feet perfectly. Your heels clicked across the floor and you pumped your hand in the air, drawing your hand across your waist and then moving it to snap as your legs spread. The ceiling opened and a flurry of bank notes fell from the sky. You caught one and tucked it into your top.

The audience screamed.

Tom nearly died at the sight, especially when you seemed to lock eyes with him for a moment. Biting your lip, you ran a hand through your hair as you grabbed onto a pair of hoops hanging from the ceiling. Steadying yourself, you spun around, and crossed your ankles. You dropped one hand and let it graze your leg. The music had you shaking your body almost unconsciously, it was like it was ingrained in you. A burst of colored powder covered the stage and you danced through it over to Tom, who was biting his lip pretty hard.

Who’s going to lose now?

You locked eyes with him and smirked, noticing him squirm. With a laugh you pushed him backward, turned around and flipped him off. Tom gasped as the crowd went nuts, and you looked over your shoulder, giving him a wink. Adrian howled his head off and Zendaya burst out laughing, watching Tom go red in the face. LL Cool J and Chrissy were eating it up, getting the camera to keep their focus on Tom. You walked back over to the dancers and jumped around, leaping onto the swing and flying over the audience. Your legs dangled and you spun through the air throwing dollar bills. It was just like that scene from The Greatest Showman, and it was as fun as it looked on screen too.

When you swung back onto the stage, the lights went out. With a smile, you brought out the lighter in your pocket and flicked it on, the light illuminating your face. You winked, blew it out, and the room burst into cheers as flurries of confetti rained down. Your team was going crazy, hugging each other and running out to hug you too.

Finally, it was over.

You could barely walk as you stumbled over to LL Cool J and Chrissy, who jokingly bowed to you. Tom was behind them, grinning at you which you chose to ignore. Adrian rushed out and kissed you, holding your face in his hands. You smiled into it, and the audience cheered your name. The kiss broke and you realized Tom was rolling his eyes at you. You stuck your tongue out at him and Chrissy came over with the belt in her hands, LL Cool J behind her.

“Quiet please!” The room went deadly silent, and you held your breath. Tom was a little nervous too, not expecting your dance to be that good. You didn’t even need Taylor Swift to make an appearance, it was just that good. He was mentally shaking his head, he shouldn’t have underestimated you.

But who knew you had that in you?

“This one was wild, I have to say. But we have a winner, and it’s not what we were expecting.” Chrissy said, looking at LL Cool J. You bounced up and down on your heels as the crowd leaned in, waiting for the winner.

“Y/N!” Chrissy yelled, and the room erupted. You clasped a hand over your mouth, completely speechless. Chrissy put the belt on you, which weighed a ton, and you smiled at the crowd. You couldn’t believe it, you’d beaten Tom Holland at his own game.Tom shook his head, but he couldn’t help smiling. You were good, and he’d admit he’d been beaten by someone superior.

“Sorry, Tom. But I guess you just lost your throne!” LL Cool J laughed, slapping him on the back. Tom chuckled, watching you shake hands with a young fan in the front. His heart swelled a little when you smiled and gave them one of your rings, but he tried to tamp his feelings down.

“Yeah, but I don’t mind. Y/N was better, she deserves it. But next time, I won’t let her win so easily.” He teased, elbowing you in the side. You gave the crowd a look and punched his arm, which made Tom pretend to be hurt as he rubbed his arm. Zendaya came out and hugged you, saying she loved your performance. You thanked her and looked around for Adrian, who was waving at you from the box.

“Anything you’d like to say, Y/N?” Chrissy asked and you took the microphone hesitantly. Everyone waited for you to speak, and you sucked in a breath. You looked over at Bailey, who was smiling at you proudly. Adrian was next to her, wearing the same smile and you suddenly knew what to say. And then there was your mom, beaming at you along with them.

“I just wanna thank my amazing team, they’re the reason I did so well, and my mom and boyfriend for making it out here. Bailey, I love you and I’d be lost without you. And also Shruti, my dance instructor who basically killed me at practices, but it paid off! Also, thanks to my fans who are always supporting me, I love you all!” You blew an air kiss and handed the microphone back to Chrissy.

“Well, thanks for voting everyone, and go see Emma in theaters soon! That’s all for Lip Sync!” Chrissy said, and everyone waved to the cameras. Finally the cameras cut off and the stage crew was ushering everyone backstage. You rejoined Bailey, Adrian, and your Mom, slipping off your heels and going barefoot. The crew congratulated you, some asking to take pictures which you happily obliged.

You were about to head back into your room to change when you felt a tap on your shoulder. You turned around and came face to face with Tom again, all alone in the hallway.

“Can we talk?” He asked, running a hand through his slightly sweaty hair. It shouldn’t have been that hot, but you started to wonder what his hair felt like on your skin. You shook your head, upset that you’d let yourself think of Tom that way when you had an amazing boyfriend waiting for you.

Whatever the two of you had was over, for good. He’d made that clear.

But God, why did he have to be so goddamn attractive all the time?

“Um, sure.” You said, telling everyone to wait for you. Tom let you walk next to him, sitting down in a chair by the door to your room. You sat down next to him, smoothing down your jumpsuit nervously. No one was around to hear whatever he was going to tell you, and that made it worse. You could feel your resolve crumbling, and part of you wondered if you should be out here with Tom alone.

“So….you wanted to talk?” You asked, playing with your rings. Tom looked over at you and you swore he was shaking, but maybe it was your eyes playing tricks. But he did look nervous, and that made you feel a little better. You weren’t the only one unsure about this.

“I just wanted to say…” Tom started, but he felt the words catch in his throat. He’d prepared what he was going to say for days now, practicing with Harrison so he wouldn’t trip up. But when it actually came to it, Tom found he just couldn’t do it. You were making him so nervous, he didn’t think he’d be able to finish what he wanted to say.

He wanted to tell you he was sorry, for everything. For the way it ended, and for how quickly he “moved on” with Zendaya. He wanted to apologize for teasing you and being so rude, and making everything between you so awkward. That’s what he wanted to say, that’s what Tom had thought about for weeks. That and you, Tom had never stopped thinking about you.

But as soon as you sat next to him, your hair falling over your shoulders and your eyes on him, Tom just couldn’t do it. There was something about you that was both alluring and intimidated, and for the first time in his life, Tom was scared.

So when he opened his mouth, he said something else entirely.

“Zendaya wants us to go on a double date. You and Adrian and the two of us. She says we should all hang out more, do you want to go out this Friday?” Tom blurted out, immediately panicking when the words left his mouth. You looked stunned and confused, searching his face for signs of a joke. When Tom just stared back at you, looking visibly uncomfortable, you opened your mouth to respond.

“We’d love to.” A voice said from behind you, and you turned to see Adrian standing behind you. His jaw was clenched, boring holes into Tom’s head. You laughed awkardly, watching Tom smile nervously. You had to do something quick, otherwise the situation would become a tinder box.

“Yeah, tell Zendaya that’d be nice.” You said, standing up and taking Adrian’s hand. Tom frowned slightly, hating the way Adrian caressed your hand with your thumb. But he’d pushed you away, and what did he expect? Of course someone would move in for the kill. Adrian glowed triumphantly, slinging an arm over your shoulder. Tom nodded, focusing his gaze on you instead.

“Great, I’ll, uh, tell her.” Tom mumbled, watching you and Adrian go back into your room. For a moment, he just stood there, his head in his hands as he realized what he’d just done. He grabbed a pillow and threw it at the wall, silently cursing himself for being so stupid.

He’d practiced the damn speech with Harrison ten times, and now he’d just asked you to go on a double date? How did he even do that? Tom had the urge to scream, but the walls were so thin you’d hear and he didn’t want to give that smug bastard the satisfaction. Tom skulked back to his room, trying to figure out what to tell everyone.

“Tom! There you are! What was up with that thing you did during the dance, I don’t remember seeing that at rehearsals.” Harrison joked, but he stopped when he saw Tom’s face fall. Zendaya looked up, concerned because Tom was now pacing the room. She touched his back and Tom flinched.

“Hey, what’s wrong? If it’s about that move you pulled, it’s okay nobody’s saying anything.” Zendaya said, showing Tom her Twitter. “They think it was funny, that’s all.”

“It’s not that, I just did something really stupid.” Tom said, collapsing onto the couch. Harrison stood next to Zendaya, the two of them exchanging glances. Harrison was the first to speak, thinking it must be about the talk.

“Is it about Y/N? What did she say when you told her?” He asked, probing for information. Tom groaned, getting up again and standing by the counter. God, he just wanted to melt into the floor right now.

“I didn’t get to because I choked. But that’s not the worst part.” He muttered, and Zendaya took over. She sat down on the counter next to Tom, quirking an eyebrow when he turned away from her.

“Tom, what did you do?” She whispered, and Tom took a deep breath. Harrison sat down, preparing for what Tom was about to say. “Tom, what happened?”

“I just asked Y/N on a double date.” Zendaya inhaled sharply and Harrison cursed, Tom slowly turning back around to face them. “The two of them, together on Friday.”

“And she said yes.”

TAGLIST (let me know if you want to be taken off!): @tommyparkerr @grandmascottlang @toms-order @darling-parker @spiderboythomas @cutiehollands @peeterparkr @jupiterparker @inlovewithmob-tom @veronicas-littleworld @da5haexowin @sergeantbxrnxs @hazsterfield @itsholyholland @underoosstark @stormyholland @let-me-luve-you @smexylemony @roses-and-sweaters @musicgirl234 @its-livelovelife @steve-thotgers @tiny-friggin-human @lovelyh0lland @blueberry-butterscotch @keylla-dunspeh @lucille-lovely @yeahbutmarvel @lokiislowkeyhot @spideymood @yoharryyouawizard @tomhollanders2013 @celestialparker @letthembehappymcu @jnej @spiderman-n @positiveparker @winterssoldierrs @heycreehere @galaxy-parker @sdrecsfics @doimakeitthroughthenight @wronglanemendes @brokensimpson @naikia @spnsoap @ninetypoundsofasthma @quitetommy @voltronshepard @marvelismylifffe @iluvmesomemarvelndc @annathesillyfriend @tiredfeels @scarlet-spiderr @hedwigthelegend @renesniajazza @bibliophile-grasshopp @tomhollandswhoremain @yeeterbenjaminparker @juliabuenooo @paradoxparker @pokeloisfk @machomango13 @parkerstylesperalta @mcuspidey @nobledoritoman @cosmicdaya @hey-its-grey @toms-gf @cutesparker @whypeterparkerwhy @sunshinehollandd @sunshineandparker @starksparker @hollandroos @blissfulparker @xxtomxo @pastelpeter @nobledoritoman @nnatasha @parkerpuffwrites @hollandsosterfield @hillsnholland @peterplanet @hopespym @peterstrainingwheels @parrkerspeters @stuckonspidey @jacobsbatalon @prkerspeter @aw-hawkeye @spideypeach @spxderbarnes @stealth-spiderr @uglypastels @darlingtholland @spideyflicker @thollandss @blissfulparker @maryjparkers @curlytoms @marvelous-maddi @trustfundparker @clockblobber @asmilinghopelessromantic @i-don’t-wanna-go-mr-stark @marvel-language @zaynjawy @sholla4-314 @beautyandflannel @lemondropirwin @angelbabymed @captnsmarvels @in-the-corner-coffee-please @peterbparkcr @william-stanley @greenarrowhead @squishyhyunjin @bibliophile-grasshopp @juliabuenooo @pokeloisfk @machomango13 @starz-23 @spoopy-spooderman @whatevsholland @aestheticstom @tomzfrog @ppunderoos @spiderkat1248 @embrace-themagic @v-valz-n @dancingoncrackedhearts @imspiderparker96 @mlt2000 @cordiebirdy @headsup-itsmostlypeter @sspideytom @yellow-inlove @kisses-holland @hardestbattles-strongestsoldiers @infamousmany @omgbstudies @theefactorygirl @aelinashryvver @sarah-moss2015 @keepmeholland @fandomdarlings @yourwonderbelle @rexorangecouny @deni-gonzalez @mylifeasafangirlforever @random-writer06 @stretchkingblog97 @sweetlyth @notethereal @pachuh @fandoms-stuff @petesrparker @yavinmoon @sweet-baby-cakes @noswagswag @l-melancholy-breeze-l @peteunderoos @jubaydahk @jackiehollanderr @yadekms @starkslovebot @practicallylivesonline @i-tried21 @stasye @unorganizedasf @1-800-back-off @tomshufflepuff @beequeen8020 @mejustbeingme @fanboy-tom @mimaligrl @theimpossiblehologramtree @diamonddia-mond @qrangr @parkeroffline @peterpumpkinparker @peters-vlogs @rosieredcheeks @tiny-friggin-human @delicately-important-trash @zabdisamor @peterbrokenparker @the-lost-fairy-tale @everestluke @gigilame @youllbemineandillbeyours @cherryblossomcharlotte @paintingbellarke @teawithbucky @miraclesoflove @let-me-luve-you @tomhaz @multi-worlds @clara-licht @ppkrtingle @laurxn-robinson @a-court-of-dreams-and-hopes @theirmidgardian @screamstillscreaming @ddaeing @ineedalittlehappiness @briiiiseyda @sincerelymlg @officiallygeek @maybemona @learning-howto-be-myselfx3 @lowkey-holland @particularsof @saturn-aka-six

The Press Tour Taglist: @notes-from-my-journal @mcuspidey @cosmicdaya @musicandbokkslovingweirdo @softspiderling @kaylzjordan @puffedgill @loki-in-hogwarts @mutuallynotmutual @psycho-mocha @evolutionofkatep @ciannemar83 @eridanuswave @sltwins @grandfunnyemopainter @kidensdouble88 @bonitajuanita @kthemarsian @ollieologys @avngrsinitiative @hannah-olivia @dans2k19 @saysomethingspiderman @strang-ersclub @ad-iuficium @fairytaleparker @neverlandparker @shawnssongs @xoluvx @violet-lilyy @itsjstz @sincerelygmg @dickgraysonnsworld @a-phan-of-youtube @webshoot3r @ihopeyousteponarosepetal @martinafigoli !

#tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland fluff #tom holland x you #tom holland x y/n #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland fic #tom holland series #peter parker #peter parker x reader #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker fic #the press tour

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jawnjendes · 4 years

Text

can’t see in the stormy weather | shawn mendes

university au, shawn x goth gf

NOTE: this is NOT the new series. this is a one shot that takes place during the early stages of their relationship... you’ll find it in the Season 1 section of the masterlist :)

goth gf playlist | masterlist

When Shawn asked me to make a playlist describing who I am, I almost threw myself back to California. I don't know what it is about people wanting to know things about me, but it's annoying. I detest it.

It's not like he made me a playlist full of sappy love songs. He just wanted to hear songs I identify with. That was borderline terrifying because Shawn is a musician. He lives and breathes music and analyzing lyrics and melodies. What's he going to think if he finds Halsey's "Without Me" or 5SOS's "Invisible?"

Oh yeah. I deeply project whatever bits of me I discover onto songs. Then I stick to those songs and keep them on repeat and I make sure no one knows about them because then people would know things about me. It's irrational and unrealistic but that's how my stupid brain works. Anyone who's ever known me needs to disappear! They can't have the luxury of knowing me and all my secrets! What the fuck would I do if Shawn and I broke up? I'd have to kill him, that's what.

"What, are you gonna kill me too if we stop being friends?" Stella asked. "Seriously, it's just a playlist. It doesn't have to be that deep."

"I told you what the prompt was, right?" I replied.

"Yeah. And that is because Shawn knows you don't verbally express yourself about… anything. So he gave you a different outlet."

Fuck, I thought I was the psychology major here.

Yes, it was easier to let Shawn in through ways where I didn't have to say things out loud and explicitly. I had to admit that. But he was still going to find out things I had yet to tell him. Important things apart from the anxiety and semi-regular therapy sessions.

"Why don't you just pick generic songs you like, and not the ones that reveal too much?" Stella suggested.

I scoffed. "I'm closed off, I'm not a liar."

"It's not lying. Everyone's favorite song means something. I was listening to Big Time Rush when I touched down on Toronto for the first time. Everytime I hear Boyfriend I think about how I successfully made it out of my parents' house."

As nice as that sentiment was, I couldn't bring myself to find ways around the prompt. I had to do what Shawn said: compile a bunch of songs that I feel represent who I am. Besides, making playlists is… really fucking fun.

It took an hour of adding, removing, and very specific placements, but I was happy about my playlist to the point where I was nervous. I sent the link to Shawn the next morning when I knew he was on the way to the gym. Figured he’d listen to it during his morning workout and get it overwith. But no.

No.

Basically, I’m a fool who forgets she’s dating a musician.

So here I was, thinking that Shawn would make of what he will about the songs I chose and we would never talk about it. Wow, was I fucking wrong. How did I not expect Shawn to want to know the why?

He was a little sneaky about it too. Shawn invited me over to his place after my classes, and why the fuck would I say no to that? Of course I went over, internally cursing myself for not shaving my legs the night before. He usually had the TV on and a steaming mug of chamomile ready for me whenever I came over no matter the circumstance. Today there was only tea, and a stupidly excited Shawn.

“We have music to listen to you today!” he said when he had me on his couch.

He knew I wouldn’t play dumb either. And because of the fact that I was looking at his stupid beautiful face, I couldn’t move away from this topic.

“Cool…” I said stiffly.

Jet Black Heart - Live

He pulled up the playlist, which I had titled with the black heart emoji, and hit shuffle. Completely going against the very intricate order I put each song in. He was surprised to hear an audience screaming at the first song, but he recognized the tune that came shortly after.

“Why’d you pick this one?” he asked, his arm going around the back of the couch, watching me with his stupid pretty eyes.

I chuckled. “It’s a goth joke! Everything about me is dark, even my heart!”

“And there’s a hurricane underneath it?” Shawn guessed. He really was going to pick apart the lyrics and apply them to me, huh? “Any reason why it’s the live version?”

The answer wasn’t anything too telling or cheesy. It was still hard to maintain eye contact as I explained. “Stella introduced me to this band. She dragged me to a 5SOS concert and now it’s our tradition to see them whenever they tour.”

“Is this your favorite song?”

“Live, yeah. It just reminds me of feeling so alive. Concerts are the only times I feel that way.”

Shawn grinned at the sentiment. He seemed happy with that answer and sang along to the rest of the song.

“And there’s your deep shit of the day,” I said when it ended.

“I want more.”

What I’m Made Of…

I felt a tiny pit in my stomach. I knew this song, and I knew that Shawn did not know this song. He was looking down at the album cover on his phone, thinking to himself. Then, he turned to me expectantly.

“So…?”

“Just enjoy the lyrics and the sick guitar solo.”

He was quiet for a minute. “Well, I do get your vibes from it. But you’re also reluctant to show me what you’re made of.”

I hesitated. “It’s uh, a battle song. I’ll fight someone for trying to forcibly take anything from me.”

“Like if somebody jumped you?”

“Physically, mentally, emotionally. Yeah.”

Again, silence. “You gonna fight me?”

I knew he was joking, and I cracked a grin. “Jury’s out.”

“Any reasoning behind this soundtrack?” He showed me the cover, and I internally tried not to panic.

I had plucked the song off the wrong album, and now Shawn knew I was a fan of a certain speedy blue creature.

So much for being cool and mysterious. I’m just a fucking nerd now.

“Nah, not at all,” I casually replied.

Honestly, I enjoyed this song. I love this song. Why else would it be on this playlist? But just this once, I wanted to skip to the next one.

And when the next one came, I wanted to skip again.

I Am… All of Me

“Do, do you kin a certain hedgehog?” Shawn asked, once again amused by the album cover.

“No…” I resisted rolling my eyes.

“This song definitely sounds like you. Tell me, am I dating a hedgehog?”

Suddenly, this felt less nerve wracking and more annoying. I sighed heavily.

“I thought you wanted to know more about me.”

He chuckled. “Hey, I’m trying. I’m interpreting all these songs in whatever way I can because you won’t explain them to me. Plus, this song is from a video game.”

“Did it occur to you that maybe I like the game this song came from? Maybe I casually like this whole franchise because-” I stopped myself upon seeing Shawn’s face light up, like he wanted me to go on.

But no, he made fun of me. This song is now void, and he will not get an answer.

“Because?” he coaxed.

“Because nothing.” I grabbed his phone out of his hand and skipped to the next song.

Without Me

“Oh, who hurt you?”

“You already know that story. Next!”

Wilson (Expensive Mistakes)

I’ll stop wearing black when they make a darker color.

Shawn looked at me for a moment, still trying to analyze the fuck out of my song choice. “I gotta say, I was expecting more goth music. You listen to a lot of mainstream artists.”

“There’s no rule saying I can’t. Mainstream artists are popular for a reason.”

“Touche. So why this song?”

“It’s what people think I am. Grumpy, bitter, always in black.”

"But that's not all you are." Shawn held his hand out to me, and I took it. He looked down at my chipped polish, running his fingers over my nails. "I mean, you are grumpy. Bitter? No, I'd say realistic. Always in black? Yeah, and you look beautiful all the time because you feel good in it."

That last part struck me. At least I didn't look odd to him. He didn't fall for the tough exterior I've built for myself. That little fact was both touching and terrifying.

"I know there's more to you than the way you dress yourself. It's why I like you so much." He grinned.

Cry With a Smile

"There's the goth metal you were looking for!" I exclaimed.

"Mm, your sense of belonging, as you put it. I know all about this already."

And he skipped to the next song.

A Little Too Much

Shawn perked up a little bit, a smile growing on his face. Then he looked at me, the corners of his eyes crinkling. "Is that me?"

Now my cheeks burned. "Yeah. This song feels like a callout."

"Babe…" He was still smiling as he leaned in to cup my face and kiss my forehead.

"Yeah, can you believe? I get tired of being a hardass sometimes." I was only half joking.

Not a lot of people knew my deal with anxiety and depression, much less why they intensified over the last couple of years. The urge to tell Shawn everything was beginning to form in my throat but I kept pushing it down. He looked too happy, and I didn't want to bring that down.

"You don't have to be a hardass around me," he said sweetly. "Actually, please don't be a hardass around me, okay? Everyone has their limits."

Then, he skipped to the next song, because he was sick of his own voice.

Fist Bump

Shawn looked at me once again, a grin on his face. Here we go again.

“I’m noticing a trend here.”

“I like this franchise, okay?”

“Okay, kinnie.”

I rolled my eyes and sat back, scrolling on my phone to diffuse the frustration. What was the point if he was just going to make fun of me?

“Hey.” Shawn gently placed his hand over my phone, getting me to put it down. “I’m only kidding. You can laugh.”

My eyes narrowed.

“I’m serious! Look, maybe if you just tell me what these songs mean to you, I’ll understand better. Just give me a chance.”

His eyes didn’t show any bit of deceit… But that’s how they all are. And everytime, I’m always a fool. So I sighed and tried not to cringe at my own words.

“It’s lame… and stupid… and really stupid. But all those silly little video game songs? They…” I exhaled, and chipped at my nails. “You know I deal with… anxiety and everlasting sadness…”

“You mean depression?” Shawn corrected.

“Yeah, whatever,” I went on. “The world is full of some real shit, and, and the songs and the games…” I made a face and looked down. “They’re comforting.”

It was silent for a minute before a hand went and cupped my chin. I was met with Shawn’s eyes and glowing smile. But then he opened his mouth and the most baby baby voice came out.

“Does Sonic make yew feew bettew?”

I smacked his hand away. “I swear to-”

But I didn’t finish that statement because he tackled me in a hug.

“Kidding, kidding! I’m sorry, baby, that was the last one, I promise!” He kissed the side of my head before leaning back to look at me. “I think it’s really cute you like this series.”

“It’s not cute, it’s self care,” I mumbled.

Head Above Water

“Finally, a song I know!” Shawn exclaimed, and he dove into singing along.

I forgot I put that one on the playlist. I meant to take it off. It only made me more nervous that Shawn already knew this song. He was one step closer to unlocking the big one.

He sounded beautiful as he sang, lost in the melancholy melody. I watched him, trying not to give anything away through my face alone. It was getting harder to keep it together, just from the little things I had already told Shawn.

And so came the inevitable expectant look. “So? Depression? Religion?”

Part of me wanted to let him think that. Depression is common, it’s easier to explain than the real reason. Besides, it’s not a lie. I do have my dark days, and even darker periods. But depression isn’t the reason for this song.

“Nope,” I replied.

“You know, Avril Lavigne wrote this when she was really sick.”

Dammit, he does know what this song is about.

I sighed heavily. “How do I put this in a way that doesn’t sound scary or pathetic?”

“You’re sick,” Shawn guessed with a chuckle. But the look on my face changed the mood, and he went serious. “How bad are we talking?”

“I get sick… every so often,” I explained. “It’s nothing scary, it’s just… chronic IBS. I can manage it, I just have to be careful with what I eat.”

He nodded as he listened. “So it’s not that bad, but it’s enough for you to have a whole song about being sick?”

I hesitated. “There’s another song, actually.”

“Two?” Shawn shifted in his seat. “So that must mean it’s a bigger deal to you than you’re making it out to be.”

And he thinks he doesn’t know me well enough.

I didn’t like talking about my health problems, unless it was with my doctor. I didn’t talk about how annoying all this shit was outside my therapist’s office. Anytime I felt frustrated about food, I talked myself down because it could literally be worse. Why would I whine about something so mundane?

“You know you don’t have to tone it down for me,” Shawn added when I stayed quiet for too long. “And, if it helps… now I understand why you read restaurant menus so carefully.”

“Like I said, I have to be careful.” My voice went thick for a moment, so I coughed. “I eat the wrong thing, and I end up sleeping in the bathroom til the wrong thing is out.”

“So it’s frustrating to deal with this all the time?”

“Yeah… and I spent two and a half years not knowing what was wrong with me, two and a half years going to the doctor more times than a young adult should for their age… two and a half years thinking I might die…”

Shawn’s eyes widened. “Years?”

“We went to a doctor in Mexico, and he finally diagnosed me with IBS,” I explained. “But that was after the words ‘lymphoma’ and ‘tumor’ were thrown into the mix. It’s not really something you forget. Oh, and I hate vomiting. I hate it so much that I can’t be in the same room as someone who might be queasy. So that’s annoying.”

“Wow…”

I suddenly felt a little self conscious. “I know it’s stu-”

“If you say stupid one more time,” Shawn cut me off. “This is the least stupid thing you could be talking about right now.”

“My anxiety links back to food, too. Think that’s important to mention.”

“Is that why you always want to go back to your dorm after a dinner date?”

Oof, so he noticed. I stayed quiet, so Shawn continued.

“I can take care-”

“No,” I said immediately. The last thing I needed was my boyfriend seeing me have a meltdown because I ate something spicy. The last thing I needed was for anyone to see me have an anxiety attack after vomiting. “It’s not your job.”

Shawn reached over to cup my cheek. Only then did I realize I had been tearing up, and he was wiping it away.

I turned my head away, dabbing at my eyes with my sweater sleeves. I didn’t want to look pathetic and I failed.

“I have to ask,” he said after a moment, “have you gotten sick at all since we started dating?”

“It is a chronic illness that I have.”

“And you just… you just took care of yourself? While you were sleeping in the bathroom?”

“Like I’ve always done since I left home.”

“Impressive. I always call my mom when I feel sick, and she comes over every time.”

I was honestly surprised. I was expecting him to be upset because I never called him in my time of need. And that alone, made more tears well up in my eyes.

“Hey,” he said, scooting closer to me. “It’s okay. You probably went through a lot before you got diagnosed. It’s frustrating, I can see it weighing on your shoulders. Just tell me if there’s anything I can do for you.”

I could feel him looming over me, waiting for me to fall back in his arms. The song had long since ended, and it wasn’t about the playlist anymore. Shawn was just waiting for me to do something. I couldn’t bear to look at him, because his kindness and understanding would make me break even more. He really was too kind, far more than I expected.

Even when I said nothing, and he took out his phone. I thought he got bored, but his next prompt made me look up at him.

“Okay, so that barbeque restaurant we went to the other night, we had spicy buffalo wings for an appetizer, so we won’t have those again. Any other food that might make you sick?”

I stared for a moment before I caught another tear with my sleeve. “Um… can we skip that whole restaurant? Barbeque and my stomach don’t mix.”

Shawn typed, and the only sound in the room was his clicking keyboard. “Got it. No more barbeque. Any other place or food to avoid?”

“It’s a long list…”

“That’s why I’m writing it down.”

_______

goth gf taglist: @normalcyisoverrated-beyou @ilsolee @mendesromano @kitykatnumber @strangerliaa @iloveshawnieboi @someoneunimportantxx @goldenmndes @ruinhoney @calyumthomas @shawnsunflower @shawnvvmendes @parkeraul @havethetimeeofyourlifee @chillingbythesea @wronglanemendes @softmendesss

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes smut #shawn x oc #shawn x goth gf #damn look at dis shit #xmas came a little late lmao #im a lil soft for shawn rn so yea

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ggsstudies · 4 years

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i promised an ask, and i will deliver! we haven't interacted before, but you seem super sweet. anyways, what are some of your favorite things to do to destress? bonus question: i'm always looking for new songs and artists, so any recommendations? have a great day!

yes an ask! you’re too sweet! we def need to chat :)

so during quarantine, i had a whole bunch more time on my hands and i was also in the midst of preparing for my senior piano recital where i was playing about 8 pieces. i needed to practice anyway (i’ve never been very good at consistently practicing piano bc i’ve always been so busy) and since i had a lot more time, i found myself going down to our basement and playing. this became suchhhh a pivotal part of my life during quarantine because before, i hadn’t realized how much music helps me. yes i knew psychologically that music helps with destressing but i had never experienced it first hand. until quarantine.

i found myself racing down the stairs to go play piano when i was feeling every emotion whether that was utter frustration and sadness or just joy and excitement. playing piano and adding all of my emotions and expressing into my music really helped. sometimes, if i was especially emotional and i played this one piece (beethoven’s sonata no 14, moonlight), i would actually cry while playing it. but i almost always felt better after doing it (im a very emotional person if you can’t tell already). so definitely piano.

however, since i’m in college now, they’ve actually closed the pianos in my dorm room and have restricted the pianos in the music department only to music majors, minors, and those in ensembles. so, i’ve kinda been falling apart since i haven’t been able to destress in the best way i’ve found so far. so life has been rough but i’m hoping to contact the head of my dorm either today or tomorrow basically pleading with them to let me play piano because if i don’t, i think i will genuinely go insane. it’s been a full month since i’ve played piano and during quarantine, the most i would go was maybe a week. so yeah it’s been hard.

wow sorry that was a super long explanation but i thought it was necessary

as for music and artist recs! bro i’m really digging harry styles rn. if you wanna check out some of the music i’m listening to, take a look at my spotify @ thegeeg113. “gigi” should pop up when you do. i make playlists for each month with new music i find from my discover weekly so check there :) my “genre” according to spotify is kinda indie pop

eeeeep that was so long but this provided a good break bc i’ve been doing schoolwork all morning :)

xoxoxoxoxo- gg

#asks #ask me #ggsstudies

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galaxae · 3 years

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3, 7 and 18 for as many as you can answer; btw do you still have an ocs page? like with introductions and all that

wow this took forever oops!

tysm for the ask!! i’ve been meaning to make a carrd or something with oc intros, but i have so goddamn many ocs and so little time now that i’m in college and all that. and i have the code saved from my old pages before i remade, but those are kind of outdated and incomplete

that being said i’m probably gonna end up making that carrd regardless of how busy i am cause special interest indulgence and all that, so i’ll post about it when i do

anyway! i’m putting the actual oc answers under a readmore because i’m gonna try to do all the ocs i listed and it’ll be kinda long lol

3. What does your oc’s voice sound like? (Or, if you have one, what’s their voiceclaim?) Can they sing, whistle, or roll their rs? Do they have any speech impediments or notable dialects/accents?

how does one even describe voices... ok here goes

avani: she’s my character for a ttrpg campaign, so her voice sounds basically like mine (which might not help much cause you don’t know how i talk lol), but when i’m talking as her i pitch my voice up a bit and make it a bit more nasally. she’s not much of a singer, nor can she whistle, but she can roll her r’s pretty well. also, since she’s autistic and hard of hearing, her tone of voice often comes off the "wrong” way

farhan: he’s another ttrpg character i play lol, or at least he will be next semester, so his voice is again kind of like mine. but when i talk as him i pitch my voice down and it’s a bit hoarse. ig his voice would also be more “masculine” than mine but whatever. he can sing and whistle but has a pretty small vocal range (since he’s, like, 13 right now and will be 16 when i rp him next semester)

carter: i imagine his voice as low and on the quiet and raspy end, with a tiny bit of a lisp. he’s way too insecure to try to sing or even whistle or anything like that, though if he practiced at it he’d probably get pretty good

calira: she’s mute so n/a i guess. but she talks pretty formally in her dialect of elvish sign language, which is definitely unusual

sam: they have kind of a low voice that’s also raspy, but with quite a bit of pep and variation in their tone. they can even sing pretty well and they like to whistle constantly while working. that creates some kind of whiplash cause sam comes off as a typical edgy teen a lot of the time

jizoriel: high-pitched with lots of voice cracks, peak pretentious preteen/early teen jerkass. he can’t really sing or do anything similar, nor does he want to very much

victoria: so quiet and raspy that you can barely make out that it’s low and has a soothing and pleasant tone to it. she can sing well, or at least she could once upon a time

rowan: just! the happiest and most cheerful voice you can imagine! so much love behind how she talks! her voice fills up her whole head and the whole room!! and she whistles sometimes while she walks

ace: defies any masculine or feminine labels, smooth and cool in theory but they stutter quite a bit

charity: gruff but with a hint of cheer and clarity behind it that comes out when she’s startled. she loves to sing but can’t whistle and can’t roll her r’s either

jamal: i actually have a voiceclaim for him! it’s this (the voice that sings from 1:51 to 1:58)

kimberly: her voice is a bit high and a bit... idk how to say it exactly... i guess shrill would be the word?

fabián: his voice seems higher-pitched than it actually is cause he talks higher when he’s anxious, and he’s always anxious. it’s a bit hard to describe his voice otherwise tbh. i can hear it in my head but i can’t quite put it to paper oops. oh yeah also he has a great singing voice but never uses it sooo

7. What song reminds you of this oc? Does this match up with the type of music your oc likes to listen to?

this question opens up a wormhole cause i have playlists for many of these guys but instead i’ll just provide one (1) song for each and vaguely describe their music taste, how does that sound

avani: honestly “mr. capgras encounters a secondhand vanity” by will wood is a “her” song to me. her music taste leans a lot more toward older music though (like some classics from the 70s and 80s and such)

farhan: he’s still very new so i haven’t really found a song for him yet. but i know he absolutely loves peppy and energetic pop music and also sappy gay love songs

carter: (slaps my hand away when i try to type another will wood song) “fantasy island” by the shins always launches me into daydreams about him. which kinda roughly aligns with his music taste, he listens to a lot of those “mainstream indie” artists. he’d also listen to will wood because he’s gay and mentally ill <3

calira: one of my favorite songs on her playlist is “maximillian von spee” by dirt poor robins. but the music she listens to is basically all invigorating church-loving stuff with medieval-era instruments lmao

sam: “sometimes” by nick lutsko is an absolute bop and very much a sam song. sam actually doesn’t go out of their way to listen to music though, but when they do they listen to either the most soothing and relaxing stuff or to the angriest metal emo music. no in between

jizoriel: i’ll go the less emo angle here and say a song that reminds me of him is “upside down” by jack johnson. jizoriel’s music taste is like. old choir music and shit plus incomprehensible magical music that doesn’t even sound like music. if he was from earth he’d like my chemical romance

victoria and rowan: i’m grouping these two together here because a song that reminds me very strongly of both of them/their relationship is “human” by dodie. which actually fits very well into both of their music tastes!

ace: again, going the less edgy angle here, “auntie earth” by walter mitty and his makeshift orchestra. but ace mostly listens to uh, classical flute music and flute covers

charity: absolutely “dance and cry” by mother mother, that’s pretty much her theme song. it’s among her favorite songs in canon too

jamal: “tire swing” by los elk, since his arc is about letting go of childhood and all that jazz. he’s more inclined to listen to fun. and other pop artists and rappers and such. he likes janelle monae

kimberly: “best tears” by the happy fits for sure. in terms of her music taste though, her taste is pretty similar to jamal’s. they bond over being janelle monae fans

fabián: by god does “heal” by so much light fit him. his taste is that he rotates through three (3) specific obscure indie artists lmao, so theoretically i guess that specific song is included in there

18. How does your oc see themself? How does this compare to the way other ocs see them?

i am gonna do my best to keep these short cause this is a loaded question for all of them hoo boy

avani: how she sees herself: honestly the worst person alive. unless she spends every moment of her time trying to make up for what she’s done, she’s worthless, and she doesn’t deserve to love herself in any capacity how others see her: her brother (farhan) really looks up to her! most of the time. the superhero team she’s on (other people’s ocs) all think she’s generally smart and capable enough, and her boyfriend in particular thinks she’s incredible

farhan: how he sees himself: as of right now? a misunderstood emo middle schooler who’s still kind of cool i guess how others see him: his sister (avani) thinks he’s quite an impressive and charismatic young man

carter: how he sees himself: 1/10 awkward and annoying how others see him: carter reminds calira too much of her old self, so she love-hates him. sam thinks he’s weak and cowardly but admires his kindness. and jizoriel clings to him as a caring father figure and loves carter’s passion for natural studies

calira: how she sees herself: it goes back and forth between “i’m the greatest chosen one ever im such a strong warrior” and “wow i’m literal trash why did the gods pick me for this” how others see her: carter is a bit intimidated by her but appreciates her attempts to vibe with him, sam thinks she’s an annoying pretentious self-important bitch (but their opinion softens over time), and jizoriel sees right through her facade and feels comfortable around her because of it

sam: how they see themself: evil and in need of redemption, kind of similar to avani ig but with 10x more confidence in their skills and also much more violent how others see them: carter knows theyre doing their best even if theyre kind of an asshole, calira is a fan of their strength and determination, and jizoriel Hates Their Guts (at first) because they baby him too much

jizoriel: how he sees himself: a fucking fraud of a prince. all he has going for him is his abilities as a mage, but even then those are shaky how others see him: carter knows he’s very insecure and wants to comfort him, calira admires his magical prowess and noble air, and sam thinks he’s a snarky little pretentious douchebag but also he reminds them of their late brother and they want to protect him at all costs

victoria: how she sees herself: basically dead. only good for interacting with ghosts. not worthy of the human world or of friendship how others see her: she reminds rowan of her old self. rowan sees a glimmer of love and hope in her and wants to bring it out

rowan: how she sees herself: a fucking mess but she’s trying her best and that’s what counts! how others see her: victoria very much appreciates her cheerful air even if she doesn’t act like it

ace: how they see themself: way too weird to be human, way too weak not to be. their self-image changes constantly. theyre very confused about everything please help how others see them: charity is literally dating them lol she thinks theyre the cutest person alive, jamal appreciates how hard they try as a friend, kimberly thinks theyre an alien invader whom she can study and use to get further in life, and fabián knows more about ace than anyone else and loves them for it

charity: how she sees herself: a Teenager who’s struggling. she desperately wants to be young without the burden of her trauma but whether she thinks of herself as emo and sad and angry or not depends a lot on her mood how others see her: ace adores everything about her, jamal loves how cool and fun and sociable she can be, kimberly is annoyed with her rebelliousness, and fabián worries very much for her well-being and can’t shake the image of her as helpless (oops that’s gonna cause some drama)

jamal: how he sees himself: just a chill guy trying to get by. unremarkable. how others see him: ace is grateful for how forgiving he can be but is still terrified of him being angry over [spoilers], charity loves how sociable and fun he is and how protective he can be of his friends, kimberly secretly envies his carefree nature, and fabián sees him as a solid acquaintance to whom he did not give a good first impression

kimberly: how she sees herself: not good! if she can’t grow up fast and do science well then she’s useless how others see her: ace wants to be friends with her but doesn’t know how to do that, charity is annoyed by her rule-bound-ness, jamal thinks she’s cool but should unwind a little, and fabián resents her at first but would still like to play chess with her sometime

fabián: how he sees himself: he has a moral responsibility to help people Or Else. way too anxious and stuck up but he doesn’t know how to change that how others see him: ace fuckin Loves this guy, charity loves him too but she gets pissed when he tries to help her with anything, jamal genuinely thinks he’s a great guy and wants to get to know him better, and kimberly is actually impressed by him and envies his apparent confidence and charisma

ok ok that’s it i promise. sorry this is so long and tysm for reading if you made it this far!! feel free to ask more oc questions literally whenever, that goes for anyone reading this <3

#pey talks #ocs tag #this was so fun to write thank you for asking ;-;#ace #avani #calira #carter #charity #fabián #farhan #jamal #jizoriel #kimberly #sam

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jae-canikeepyou · 5 years

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| connecting | j.jh

pairing: jaehyun x fem!reader genre: fluff a/n: i was really excited to write this since it was inspired by my fave disney movie “tangled” ! hope you enjoy reading ^^ still thinking if there should be a part two(?) for this. let me know!! :D

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the sun rose just in time at the moment you opened your eyes. a new morning, a new day, and a new hope. shockingly though, the alarm clock did not do its job. that meant you had to place new ones if it was the batteries. the smell of bacon made you up on your toes, leading you downstairs to the garden.

on most days and most often, you stayed at the tree house your uncle had built. it kind of became your permanent room rather than the one you had at the actual house. you lived at the countryside. not exactly though. when you moved houses, it partially felt like it was a forest, fresh air and greenery.

oh the sound of the raw meat sizzling was making you drool as you saw your mother— stepmother, to be precise, smiling as she told you to sit with her. “only bacon would make you step out of that tree house.”

“ah well, it’s my little paradise after all.” you eyed her with a grin on your face. your stepmother raised you as her own since your birth parents, didn’t really know how to care for an infant. your father was blind and needed assistance; and your mother cared for you a little while but eventually left for another man. so your stepmother came into the picture at the time before you even turned one. “i get to do things i want without being disturbed.”

“that’s alright. an artist like you need space and quiet. how many canvases have you painted on?” she asked as she plated your meal, getting the meat from the grill.

you took a bite almost immediately from the serving tong. a joking but soft scoff escaped from your mother’s lips. “mom, there’s too many that i lost count. but remember the huge boxes you got for me on christmas? yeah one of those are close to be full of em’.”

“oh wow, you have to show me your masterpieces.” she clapped her hands together. she checked her watch, only to jump slightly at the time. “i’ll be late for the flight.”

“you’re leaving, mom?” you asked, a tiny complain from you made her giggle.

“it’s a business trip again, sweetie. i’ll be back in four days.” she cooed you with a tight hug.

“but you’ll miss my birthday.” you sighed, placing the plate down onto the wooden table.

“i’ll make it up to you when i get back, alright?” she pecked your forehead before leaving you. “see you in three days. love you my princess.”

hardworking as she always was, your stepmother would often go overseas for meetings since she worked with a company that required a translator. and apparently she was ranked at the top category, so the demand for her was quite high.

“love you too mom!” you yelled back.

you finished your meal and headed back to the tree house to continue with painting the canvases. the paintings you started, were something you hoped your father could be able to admire. he never got to see the world, the people, the beauty, and you.

the childhood you had was something you remembered; still so fresh, as if it was yesterday. the house that was passed on from your father’s side ultimately became a shelter of nightmare. the word cancer was foreign to the teen you, definitely out of your vocabulary. you needed explanation as to why your father had gotten it, and why he had to leave the earth early. it had been three years after all.

not long since you began to paint almost half way onto the third canvas, the radio you were listening to blasted the playlist with your favorite boy group; that alone kept you hyped up, nearly knocking down several acrylic paint bottles over. the music moved your toes, then your legs, eventually your whole body. even your hair swayed in motion, as if the wind had blown it.

“i just wish i could get to see them live.” you sighed, colors you puto onto the canvas blended with your emotions. “ugh, i’m so senti.” (sentimental). the clock showed quarter to four, it already had been hours since mother left.

the once upbeat vibe came to a halt when you heard a couple of boys yelling with bicycle bells ringing. it also seemed like one was being chased too. you scoffed as you went to take a peek off of the window. they ruined your moment of jamming. the yells were increasing when the half of your body was out of the window. you saw a couple of figures at the far distance of your front yard.

a ruffle from the bush that was near your tree house gave a sound of light crash. a bell rang from it too. was it a bicycle? as you further your body look at the bush on the just on the left side of the tree house, your sight suddenly came to a dim.

your body met with a boy with pink hair. as your eyes kept closed, bracing yourself for the impact, you knew his body slammed into yours and for sure you heard his honey-like voice. “nghh agh!” he gasped as his body was on top of yours, but your head rested on something you assumed it was his hands.

the light from the sun made you open your eyes. the pink haired boy smiled sheepishly and the first you noticed was his ears.

“can you get off me?” you asked sternly.

“oh my g- i’m so sorry!” he stood up as he dusted his clothes. the yells from the boys grew louder, making the pink haired boy flinch at their presence. you took a peek at the front yard, around four boys on their bikes, looking for someone. “ugh man, they chased me until here?” he took a peek as well and hissed at what he saw, before sitting back down by the bottom of the window.

“you know i could report you for trespassing.” you stood up, pointing your paintbrush at him.

he had his hands up in the air as if he was caught by the police. “hold up now i don’t want my shirt to be dirtied.” he said. “i’ll explain later but is it okay if i hide here for a while, maybe for tonight too?” he asked as his eyes trailed off.

you wanted to refuse but girl, his dimples showed and to be honest, you thought guys with dimples were the most sweetest. how could you resist him? especially as of right now, he was smiling at you, clearly embarrassed. but after all, he was a stranger and interrupted your jam session. “i don’t normally allow strangers here, let alone you.” you furrowed your brows.

“ah c’mon! with a face like this?” he suddenly pouted— no, was that a smoulder? gross. “look, i’m having a rough day today and i really need a breather-”

“then i think a breather for you would be outside?” you pushed him to the window, his footsteps hit the wooden floor with such impact at the force he received.

“hey hey hey! watch it!” he yelled with his palms touching the edge of the window. “do you want me to die?!”

“i don’t see why not?” your attempt to push him stopped as the radio continued to play the playlist you were listening earlier. “ooh yay!” you hopped back to your paintings.

the pink haired boy eyed you with confusion. “girls have such weird mood swings.” he walked up to you, mouthing the lyrics to the song.

“you know them??” you turned around to the boy. “man i love them!” you felt yourself heating up realising the boy still climbed your tree house. “i- i like them..” you cleared your throat.

“i can tell.” he laughed at you.

“anyway, you have to leave.” you pushed the boy to the door. not the window this time.

“please, can i stay here for tonight? i can’t have my buds chasing me like i’m a prey.” he sighed. his tone made you wonder how a pretty boy like him could utter such cute tantrums.

he sat down at the table by the door, taking a sip from your cup. you crossed your arms at how he felt so homey immediately after invading someone’s property. “why were you being chased?” you questioned with curiosity. the boy seemed desperate to hide and you had to hear him reason out.

“i skipped rehearsal yesterday.. and today. told them i wanted a break because we’ve been practicing non-stop.” he walked to your hanging cradle chair and sat on it. an long exhale escaped from him. you eyed him from head to toe. his whole body worn out with slight shakes.

“i’ll let you stay..” you said, the boy’s eyes beamed with life.

“yes! haha! thank you so much!” he placed his hands at the back of his head.

“..with one condition.” you continued.

“anything for you, miss..?” he now stood up and walked up to the window where he had entered earlier.

“y/n. my name’s y/n.” you said, blending the colors for the last time before actually stopping for the day.

“y/n.. i’m yoonoh.” his voice trailed off but with a tone of amusement. “what’s your condition then?

the amphitheatre at the distance’s horizon caught your eye as you looked at the view. you remembered your mother’s words: “only bacon would make you step out of that tree house.” funny fact though, food was the only way to make you go out of your residence’s area. as you made up your mind, your sigh caught his attention. “see that park with that shade thing flying above it?” you asked.

the boy turned to the direction you had told him. he squinted for a clearer and distinct view, where it shortly came into his sight. “yeah, the amphitheatre. what about it?”

“i want you to bring me there.” you smiled, making yoonoh do the same. his response was a tilt of a head. you exhaled before continuing. “tomorrow evening, that ampitheatre will light up in colors. it does that every year. i want to see it in person, like how it’s special.”

“it does, yeah. you haven’t been to the city?” yoonoh asked, his arms crossed.

“never. i’ve haven’t seen the city since i moved here and when i was a wee baby. more of i didn’t want to because i tend to limit myself from seeing the world.” you opened up to him as you tidied your art supplies.

“why is that? there’s more to see out there! i can tour you if you like.” his dimples showed again.

your body hesitated for a while, lips tried to find words to answer him. “my father was blind. he never got to see the world’s beauty, so i thought i’d do the same, y’know, experience things he did and understand him. now that he’s passed, maybe there’s benefit from a different point of view. my hearing got sensitive, in a good way.”

yoonoh stayed silent, respecting your words. he didn’t want you to stay caged in here any longer. “coming from someone who hasn’t seen outside beauty, you’ve got great imaginations.” he pointed to the wall of canvases. “i’ll bring you to the amphitheatre, first thing in the morning.”

to think that you would step foot to the lands of the city made your stomach churn. the whole experience would be something new. yoonoh sat back at the hanged cradle chair, taking several selfies at different angles, and there was no signs of stopping any sooner. you let him be, he looked tired anyway. his sweats slid down from the temples, and as he wiped them, he caught you looking at him. “i know i’m handsome.” he said. cheeky fella’, but he ain’t lying.

luckily though, the tree house had an extra room besides the one you both were in now. your uncle had included it in the design if you had friends over. yoonoh could stay there even if it was a little cramped. he wouldn’t complain, would he? the day seemed to end quickly; with three completed paintings and endless conversations with your ‘new-found friend’? wait you weren’t there yet. he was someone you had met accidentally.

maybe sometimes accidents can lead to something new.

#jung jaehyun #nct 127 #jung yoonoh #nct #nct jaehyun #jaehyun #jaehyun nct #jaehyun au #jaehyun writings #jaehyun scenarios #nct writings #nct scenarios #jaehyun oneshot

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johannesviii · 4 years

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Top 12 Personal Favorite Hit Songs from 2000

This was the hardest list to make so far, so yeah, it’s a top twelve because I felt disgusting cutting the last two songs. Oh well. Screw the rules.

I turned 12 that year! I had my own cd player, which was also a radio! I could make tapes and burn cds. I could even BUY cds too if I saved all my money for a couple of months! School wasn’t great, because of some bullies, but I still had some friends. I loved Pokemon and drawing in the park. Life felt good.

Music had never sounded better.

Disclaimers:

Keep in mind I’m using both the year-end top 100 lists from the US and from France while making these top 10 things. There’s songs in English that charted in my country way higher than they did in their home countries, or even earlier or later, so that might get surprising at times.

Of course there will be stuff in French. We suck. I know. It’s my list. Deal with it.

My musical tastes have always been terrible and I’m not a critic, just a listener and an idiot.

I have sound to color synesthesia which justifies nothing but might explain why I have trouble describing some songs in other terms than visual ones.

Not gonna lie, this list changed A LOT over the course of this post and I had to rearrange it several times. And then I gave up and changed it into a top 12. Also, this list of honorable mentions could almost make it a top 20 since several of these (half of them, actually) were on the top at some point.

All the small things (Blink 182) - I’m really glad these guys are still around today, to be honest. They always make me smile when I hear their new songs on the radio.

The Riddle (Gigi d’Agostino) - Love it, but it loses some of its appeal without the music video.

Lady (Modjo) - I claim overplay for this cut.

L’Alizé (Alizée) - More on that later.

Move your body (Eiffel 65) - Would have made the list in a more mediocre year, I swear.

Optimistique-moi (Mylène Farmer) - I literally said “self-care” before making this cut. Also the music video is great, it’s an artist trying to escape from some sort of nightmare circus, and a magician helps her. Very underrated music video.

Music (Madonna) - The most painful cut of all. I absolutely loved this song and how weird and disjointed and broken it sounded, and had it on several tapes. And yet there’s no room for it even with a top 12.

And now, the actual list. Warning: it starts with a curveball.

12 - J’pète les plombs (Disiz La Peste)

US: Not on the list / FR: #29

A French rap song about a guy losing his job and being stuck in traffic and subsequently going postal.

Here’s the kicker, though. This guy was rapping for my city, and this music video was filmed mostly in the estate I was living in at the time! That McDonalds at the beginning? It was across the street! That bus stop was in front of high school! Heck, I painted the rocks in that park at the end several times already!

And it became a huge hit!! You have no idea how excited we were in middle school. Everyone knew the lyrics (translation here)! Even if some parts were very rude! We still loved it! We were quoting the entirety of the McDonalds part where the guy wants an egg in his sandwich and is ready to fire a harpoon to get it. “Désolé, il est midi et après midi eh ben l’mac morning c’est fini” was a goddamn meme here.

It would probably have been less funny if the singer didn’t look like a cute nerd, it turns the music video into a hilarious parody. Especially because instead of a gun, he’s menacing people with a harpoon, a giant wooden hammer and a water pistol.

Legends only.

11 - One More Time (Daft Punk)

US: Not on the list / FR: #30

Around the World was a repetitive song, and while I kinda liked it, I didn’t quite get the hype around it at the time. But One More Time is a huge party, and everybody is invited, and all the drama stays at the door, and everyone just has a great time. And it has one of the most fitting music videos ever.

It’s a monster of a song, and even if it’s still a bit too repetitive to be listened to on a loop, it was a delight everytime it was on the radio. And it still is! Godspeed, Daft Punk.

10 - Innamoramento (Mylène Farmer)

US: Not on the list / FR: #91

I really, really tried to keep her off the list. And I failed. Innamoramento, the album, is one of my favorite albums of one of my favorite French artists ever and I’m weak, and out of the five (five) singles out of that album, I only managed to leave two out of my top 10 lists.

This sounds absolutely fantastic. There’s no way I could kick it off the list, even to make room for a guy who was rapping for my estate. And not even for goddamn Daft Punk.

Kill me now.

9 - Absolutely (Nine Days)

US: #35 / FR: Not on the list

I discovered this song in 2008 through a Silent Hill 3 AMV about Heather. Yeppppp. It’s here, and it’s still great 11 years later, and I love it, and this song was so good I put it on my playlist immediately and it stayed on it for several years.

The lyrics never really deliver their promise of telling a “story”, but it’s still a fantastic, bouncy, uplifting song, and it made my world better, and I have to thank that ephemeral band for that.

And I especially loved the very brief pause before the last “girl” in the song. Very relatable.

8 - J’en rêve encore (De Palmas)

US: Not on the list / FR: #27

Listen. I have no idea what’s up with these specific chords, but they are the sound of a weird mix of nostalgia, anger and above all, discomfort. No other song has the exact colors this one has and no other broadcasts this very specific mixed feeling.

Too bad the lyrics are yet another breakup song, or more specifically a post-breakup song (even if the lyrics are very, very good ; I just checked who wrote them and it’s Jean-Jacques Goldman. I had no idea but now, I can definitely hear it), because the music is really something else. At least to me. Is anyone else hearing this?

7 - The Real Slim Shady (Eminem)

US: #51 / FR: #28

Wow. Would you look at that. The ex angsty angry teenager loved Eminem. What a surprise, uh.

To be honest, I already genuinely liked this song as a kid even if I could only understand a few isolated parts and words, and the fact that this guy was pissed off and clearly being offensive, possibly towards everyone, was enough.

Now that I can understand the lyrics entirely, I obviously don’t endorse all of them (like the very backhanded argument for gay marriage. Jesus), but I can’t help it, this song still kicks ass. It would be dishonest to leave it out of the list. I loved it so much at the time. And I still enjoy it a lot.

6 - Natural Blues (Moby)

US: Not on the list. Not on any US year-end list actually. I thought it was big everywhere but no. What happened. / FR: #49

There’s overplay, and then there’s “I keep hearing this song everywhere and yet I can never get enough of it, and I will sing it at school, and I will put it on tapes, and I will listen to it even when it’s not on the radio.”

If you asked me what the year 2000 sounded like, it sounded like Natural Blues. I genuinely can’t believe it’s not on the US year-end chart.

5 - Around the World (ATC)

US: Not on the list / FR: #48

This has no right being this catchy without ever, ever becoming annoying. What kind of evil pact did you make to get this result. How.

4 - Jeune et Con (Saez)

US: Not on the list / FR: #70

The title is “Young and Stupid”. It’s an extremely angry song against the establishment. Didn’t pay a lot of attention to it when it came out because well, I was 12, but I would drink up this kind of angry, angsty song only three/four years later. It has aged like fine wine too and feels like the ultimate ‘Ok Boomer’ song ; here’s a translation. It is brutal. You’re welcome.

If I had better taste this would be above the next two songs.

3 - Daddy DJ (Daddy DJ)

US: Not on the list / FR: #5

As I said in the intro, I started to BUY music that year. I could pick what I wanted to own, as long as my parents thought the cds were appropriate.

So I went to the nearest record store. It was called “Madison” and had a chrome aesthetic, with neons and fluorescent 90s shit everywhere, and banners with band names on it, and somewhat menacing posters (the Iron Maiden ones looked scary). It was very intimidating.

And so, 12 years old Johannes, under dad’s supervision, picked the cd they wanted above all the other cds in the shop knowing THAT one wouldn’t make anyone angry at home, went towards the desk, slapped a lot of coins on it, and bought this, trying to look as fierce and determined a 12 y.o can, which isn’t much.

It still slaps nearly twenty years later and I don’t regret a single thing. That’s all I have to say about Daddy DJ by Daddy DJ.

So I was making this list, feeling pretty good about putting Mylène Farmer so low on it, and I was like oh wow, I genuinely love all these other songs more than the two she released that year! This feels great. This is healing. This is progress. It also means the most controversial things on the list are a nerd threatening people with a water pistol and Eminem spouting his usual bullshit empty provocations. No big deal. It’s okay! Moving on.

What was the French #1 for that year, by the way? I can’t rememb-

OH SHIT OH F█CK

OH NO

2 - Moi Lolita (Alizée)

US: Not on the list / FR: #1

Meet the new boss. Same as the old boss.

Mylène Farmer wrote this for Alizée. Screw the entire universe. I want her off my lists but I can’t because I need to make them honestly.

“I’m not a sucker, I never bought the album AND I never bought these singles in a SHOP, I got them in a garage sale the next year for less that a quarter of the price”, says the person who is, in fact, clearly and definitely a sucker.

How can a song be so horribly catchy and horribly controversial at the same time. HOW. It’s unfair. For some context about how controversial this is if you’re an English speaker, this is what would happen if Bad Guy by Billie Eilish was the catchiest shit in the world. This was almost #1 on my list before I noticed my actual #1 song made it pretty high on the French year-end list despite being mysteriously absent from the US one.

Also I’m glad the music video provides a mostly harmless context: this girl is supposed to babysit her little sister, but she went dancing in a club. And the little sister is looking after her instead. I’m saying “mostly” harmless because there’s that creepy guy who keeps watching her, as if the story was saying “you should not do this and you are putting yourself in danger and this will end horribly”. Which is a sentiment I can definitely get behind, and at the time, I was already highly skeptical about the message this song was sending even if I loved it. I’m just judging that through the comments I was writing next to it on my “favorite songs” lists (”leave your little sister out of this, Alizée”):

Bonus: most relatable comment on the video by a mile.

Same, my dude.

This is why the first album I bought was Daddy DJ and not that one or, uh, the next one.

1 - Stan (Eminem)

US: Not on the list either?? What happened. Why / FR: #18

This song actually created a new English verb. Think about that for a second.

Also, until the end of my life, I will wonder why people suddenly decided, a couple of years ago, than “to stan” now meant “admiring a lot and being a huge fan of” instead of “being a creepy obsessed stalker and possibly dangerous”.

Anyhow.

I couldn’t understand one tenth of the lyrics at the time this was a hit, but I still sneakily put it on my tapes. I knew my parents disapproved. Oh, I liked it. I loved it. I adored it.

I was also terrified of it.

One of the only lines I clearly understood with my limited English was the “I’m your biggest fan” line, and how increasingly dangerous the guy sounded, and that Eminem was trying to answer him at the end but it was too late and he had already done some horrible shit.

This is a horror story in song form, it stays with you long after it’s over every time you listen to it, and it’s a rare and precious thing.

I’m still genuinely terrified after all these years, though.

Next up: another mix of embarrassing shit and valid stuff

#Johannes’ bad not good pretty terrible music lists #music #long post #eye contact tw

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wackpainterkid · 5 years

Note

Hmm for a prompt perhaps something with Liv, Noah, Esra and Ralph all together? I’d love to see that friendship explored 💕

Omg yes me too, I love them all so much. Thank you for the prompt, I hope you like it!

chosen family

Ralph: Livvie Love, you feel like having a family dinner with Esra and me tonight?

Liv: Love to!

Ralph: Just come to the apartment, we’ll cook for you

Liv: Okay :)

-/-

Liv slides her key into the lock and opens the door to the apartment. It has been two days again since she’d been home. It isn’t her fault though, it’s Noah’s. Because every time she wants to leave, he looks at her with those blue eyes and before she knows it, she’s roped into staying another night. And being away from home for another night. So, when Ralph had asked to eat dinner together, she couldn’t say no. He deserves some attention and she also just genuinely misses him—and Esra too.

“Hey!” she yells to announce her presence and closes the front door again.

“Hey!” Esra and Ralph reply in unison.

“It smells good in here!” Liv hangs up her coat before entering the kitchen where her two friends are. Esra is standing at the stove, stirring in a casserole; Ralph is seated as he’s putting olives into a bowl.

The two of them share a confused look.

“Umm Liv…” Ralph’s eyebrows change into a frown. “Where’s Noah?”

Liv copies his expression. For a second, she wonders whether she completely forgot he was supposed to come as well but the longer she thinks about it, the more she’s sure Noah wasn’t mentioned anywhere.

“What do you mean? He’s back at his house.” She motions behind her. He’s at the place she left to come here. To have dinner, with them.

“You didn’t bring him?” Esra asks with surprise in her voice as she turns off the stove and turns towards them.

“I– “Liv doesn’t know what to answer. “I didn’t think you’d want him here.”

“Liv!” Ralph almost seems offended. “We love Noah.”

“You do?”

What on earth is happening?

“Yeah we do.” Esra nods vigorously.

This is new information.

“Well in that case… I can call him if you want?”

“Yes!” Again, they spoke simultaneously.

Liv laughs. “Okay. I’ll do that.” She’s still very much confused about everything that has just unfolded but she is sure calling Noah can do no harm.

-/-

Noah arrives twenty minutes later. Liv opens the door to welcome him and he silently asks her what is going on with mirth in his eyes. She just shrugs and mouths “They wanted you here.”

And they sure do, because once he walks in, both Esra and Ralph jump up from their chairs to hug and greet him.

Liv watches the scene and she is almost offended by how joyous they are to see him while she only got a hey. Almost, but not really because it means that her friends apparently adore her boyfriend and she can have nothing against that.

Dinner is great; they laugh, they talk. Noah compliments the food and Esra beams when she says thank you.

She can see them liking Noah more and more by the minute.

Somewhere between the main course and dessert, Noah’s hand finds hers and with a subtle smile, she intertwines their fingers beneath the table, hidden from the rest. She suspects Ralph knows, however, because he keeps on staring at them with a smug, slightly too satisfied grin.

Their stomachs sated, they clear the table and move to the living room. Esra proposes a game of Pictionary and the idea is heartily received by the rest of them. Liv teams up with Esra, Ralph with Noah. It doesn’t take long before the game gets heated because Ralph fails to guess Noah’s drawing—who knew a computer mouse could resemble both a guitar and a sponge.

“You know, for being an artist, you’re not that good at drawing,” Ralph comments.

The loving atmosphere disappears for a moment and Liv’s eyes widen at the remark as she places her hand before her mouth. She’s definitely not getting involved in this one.

“I disagree,” Esra intervenes. “Because that’s clearly a computer mouse. Don’t be a sore loser, Ralph.”

Ralph sulks.

“Thank you, Esra.” Noah bows his head in gratitude.

“You’re welcome,” she says with a wink before throwing Ralph a determined look.

He gets the hint because he soon apologizes to Noah and the boys hug it out.

Because that’s apparently a thing they do.

For the next hour or so, they just sit in the couches of their living room. Liv and Noah share the smaller couch while Ralph and Esra settle in the other one. One of Liv’s playlists is playing in the background as they chat some more.

And the moment is so peaceful and nice, that Liv just smiles as she snuggles closer to Noah and listens to the story Ralph and Esra are telling about the time they accidentally ended up in Paris.

She’s really lucky to have these people in her life, almost like a little family.

“Oh wow, it’s late!” Esra suddenly says while looking at her watch. “I have to get up early for work tomorrow, so I need to go home.” She gets up and puts her Doc Martins back on. “I had a lovely time tonight, guys. We should do this again sometime.”

All of them hum in agreement. Esra hugs all of them and when she approaches them, Noah speaks: “Thanks for the invite,” he says, “And for the delicious food.”

“My pleasure,” Esra replies. “Next time, make sure she brings you along from the start.”

He softly chuckles while slightly tightening his arm around Liv’s waist. “I will.”

Esra waves one last time and disappears. “Night, darlings!” and Liv can hear the front door shut, leaving just the three of them.

She is getting tired as well and seeing that they spent most of last night either making out or talking, she knows Noah did not get enough sleep either. She bumps his hip with hers to catch his attention.

“Wanna stay over?”

“Sure.”

“Let’s go to bed then.”

“Good night, love birds,” Ralph says with a sing-song voice and with that same damn smirk.

She shakes her head while sighing, he really is infallible.

“Night, Ralph.”

Liv shuts her bedroom door behind them, granting them some privacy again. They go through all of the steps to get ready for bed; Noah takes his clothes off; Liv takes her earrings out and changes into her pajamas and they both crawl into bed.

“You know,” Noah says, his words slightly muffled by pillow his head is buried in. “I really like Ralph and Esra.”

His hand is busy mindlessly drawing on Liv’s skin.

A chuckle escapes her mouth. “I mean, that’s good seeing that they’ve practically adopted you.”

“Does that mean that I’m part of the family?”

It’s meant to be a joke, but she knows him.

She knows what that means to him, to be part of something, to be welcomed into a group of people, to be wanted. And while it still kind of scares her—the vulnerability and risk—she can’t say anything but the truth.

“Yeah, definitely. I don’t know how you managed to do it so quickly but you’re part of it.”

His hand halts for a moment.

And starts again.

“It’s ‘cause I’m just so lovable,” he jests, wanting a reaction from her, an eye roll maybe or perhaps her saying that he’s a weirdo.

She doesn’t however, she just replies: “You are.”

And snuggles closer.

#skam nl #skamnl #written words

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thisismetryin · 4 years

Note

im so sorry im gonna send u like 3 lol: valley, oh wonder, A R I Z O N A

HI ASHLEY don’t worry about it omg! i know oh wonder so i’m gonna do oh wonder first

OH WONDER:

Do I know them already?: yes | no

Favourite Song: i really love livewire but lately i’ve been feeling their new songs as well? better now is so good

Least Favourite Song: i don’t know! i need to listen to them more to have a least favorite

Favourite Album: i think i’d have to say their OG album because i’m less familiar with their second album?

Least Favourite Album: by logic i guess the second album ;-;

Song that got me into them: my then boyfriend really liked their music, i think the first songs i listened to were livewire and without you

Seen Live?: i WISH if they come to hong kong i’m definitely buying tickets

Rate: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 (8.5)

VALLEY:

Do I know them already?: yes | no

First song youtube took me to: sports car

First Impression: oooh i like how it starts! oh the singer’s voice surprised me a bit. oh i really like this both sonically and lyrically (like it has interesting lyrics) OHT HERE’S A GIRL VOICE i like these duos. this is not what i expected from a song with the lyrics “sports car” but yeah! and OH the ending wow

Do I like it?: YES i really do this is a song that belongs in my songs i like playlist! you have excellent taste omg

Would I listen to more from them?: definitely

Rate (from what I heard): 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 (7.5 or 8)

A R I Z O N A:

Do I know them already?: yes | no

First song youtube took me to: problems

First Impression: i think i’m going to like this. song about people not liking me? YES me. oh god i think i’m gonna really like this OH the chorus wow. i’d definitely listen to this again this is really good wow it’s the kind of pop/indie-pop that i really like but haven't gone into for a while?

Do I like it?: YEP i do for sure this is relatable oml

Would I listen to more from them?: yeah, definitely!

Rate (from what I heard): 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 (also 7.5)

i think we have similar tastes ashley so tysm for recommending!!! idk if you know them but i’d also recommend the band dresses (they’ve disbanded now but they make similar indie-ish music)

send me a band/artist!

#autumnsair #cat replies

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ilovemygaydad · 5 years

Text

Friends in Dark Places [ch 7]

pairing: eventual moxiety, eventual logince, background eventual remile, background eventual remy/emile/deceit

WARNINGS: blood, self harm, panic attacks, crying, poor coping mechanisms, mentions of sensory overload, intrusive thoughts, self doubt, self hatred, possibly something else

tag list: @hufflepuffgirl01 @cocobearthe4th @cas-is-a-hunter@band-be-boss-blog @theunoriginaldaisy

a/n: so i have to repost all of these in a different format! yay fucking me!!!! please consider reblogging these if you’re a fan of this series because it’s all fucked up now

first - previous - next - companions

consider buying me a coffee (please)

Before he piled into the back of the car, Virgil took his headphones out of his bag and slid them over his ears. He didn’t need a sensory overload at 7:30 in the morning just because the Disney Prince didn’t have any volume control. Like, at all.

“Wow, Roman! I like the new look! The bomber jacket really makes the whole thing work,” Patton squealed. Roman turned in his seat to look back at Pat, and Virgil could see what he meant. Instead of his usual bare face, he’d put on gold shimmery eyeshadow and red lipstick. Virgil hated to admit it, but he looked really good.

A few minutes into the ride, Virgil felt a light tap on his shoulder. He turned to Patton, who was obviously the giver of the “pat,” with raised eyebrows.

Are you okay? Patton mouthed, tapping his ears to simulate headphones.

Yeah. No need to be overstimulated so early. Virgil mouthed back with a gesture to Roman, who was still singing along to various Disney songs. Patton just nodded and went back to conversing--er, trying to converse with Logan.

The car arrived at Westview High at exactly 7:45, giving each of the students plenty of time to do what they needed before class started at eight. Patton and Virgil went to the office together to drop off their absence notes, then parted ways to go to their lockers.

Virgil walked the whole twenty feet trek to his locker to drop off his backpack and grab his Graphic Arts portfolio and pencil case. He shoved his phone into his hoodie pocket and turned up the volume on his playlist, blasting Green Day as he walked to the opposite end of the school for his first block class.

The dark-clad teenager had hoped he would fly under the radar, but the instant he walked into the graphic arts room, his teacher ambushed him.

“Virgil! I got your email, but what landed you in the hospital for three days?” Mrs. Miller asked. Virgil nearly dropped his binder due to the pure shock of being spoken to so suddenly. He ripped off his headphones and put a hand to his chest.

“First of all, don’t jump out like that,” he said as he made sure all of his bandages were hidden under his sleeves. “Second… I, uh… had a, uh, really bad… allergy… attack. Like, hives all over my body and face. I had to get allergy testing and stuff, and I was on constant antihistamines for, like, three days.” The story was definitely not very believable, and Virgil could see in Mrs. Miller’s eyes that she didn’t believe him at all.

“Sure. Anyway, we’re going to be working on banners or helping clean the lab. You can choose either since I know you’re probably almost done with your banner. Or you are done, which wouldn’t be surprising.” Virgil nodded and headed to the back, tying one of the ink-covered aprons around his waist and began to spray solvent onto one of the many barely-used rags from the discard. He muttered under his breath about how the other students needed to learn that rags were meant to be absolutely filthy when they were discarded, but he ultimately let it go.

Virgil slipped his headphones on and cleaned three screens and a few pallet knives in a blissful bubble of music. His cathartic cleaning session, however, came to a quick end when he had cleaned everything in the shop in just under an hour. With a whole twenty-five minutes left. It wouldn’t be as much of a problem if he wasn’t mostly finished with his project.

Without any surprise, it took him only five minutes to put finishing touches on his banner. He sighed and sent it to the color printer. Might as well turn it in if he’s done, right? Virgil trudged to the printer and took out the streaky mess. The printer, just to his luck, had been having problems with colored bars randomly showing up on people’s prints, and his was not the exception. As well, it all happened right in the part with the smaller, thin lettering that named the bands.

“Hey, Mrs. Miller. Can I just send you a PDF of the banner? The printer chewed up my design and spat it back out.” Virgil asked as he walked to his teacher’s office door and leaned on the door frame. She took a look at the paper he was holding up and sighed.

“Yeah, that’s fine. I just called IT yesterday and had them fix the printer. That thing is a disaster.” Mrs. Miller shook her head and waved Virgil over. “Let me see your design.”

Virgil hesitated but stepped forward, dropping the paper on her desk. He tugged his hands into his sleeves as his teacher scrutinized the paper. With a heavy sigh, Mrs. Miller set it back on her desk.

“It’s pretty plain, Virgil. Like, it certainly meets all of the criteria for the project, and is definitely good enough to be a perfect grade, but... Virgil, what happened to your amazing designs? This is… bland. Pretty--don’t get me wrong--but bland.” The teen felt the blood rush from his body in one fell swoop. He hadn’t wanted to let her down! He had just thought that it fit the aesthetic of the festival better. But at the same time, he thought back to his past few designs, and the results were disappointing at best. She was right. They were bad.

“I… I’m sorry. You’re right; it sucks.. I’ll go redesign it. Just--yeah.” Virgil swung around and made a motion to leave when Mrs. Miller called after him. He stopped in his tracks but didn’t turn around.

“Virgil. It’s fine. I don’t want you to get upset about it. I’m just saying that you haven’t been acting like yourself recently, and it shows in your work. Art is full of emotion, so when the artist feels down, the art reflects that.” Virgil could feel her eyes burning into the back of his head, feeding him with self-doubt and fear. He had wanted to hide his feelings better--it was his responsibility to hide everything away inside of himself. Feelings hurt others, and if he had to suffer to keep others safe, then that’s what he had to do. An icy chill shot through his veins at the same time as hot fire. He needed out.

He curtly nodded and walked out of the office. As he sat down in his chair, he took out his phone to text Patton, but realized he hadn’t asked for his number. That just added to his anxiety--how would he be able to meet up with Pat and the others after school to get a ride home? The panic began to rise up his chest until he couldn’t bear it anymore. With all of the false calm he could muster, Virgil asked Mrs. Miller if he could to go to the bathroom, to which she obviously said yes.

His footsteps pounded down the hallway as he ran, even though the nearest bathroom was just a few yards away. Virgil slammed the stall door shut, sliding to the floor with a sob. This wasn’t supposed to be difficult. He had a friend now, and he was so sweet and kind and caring. Not to mention he was living with said friend and his equally-as-nice family, who gave him a really wonderful room and fed him and took care of him. They even fucking committed insurance fraud for him even though they knew nothing about him.

Virgil rolled up his sleeve and began to harshly scratch his forearm where there were no bandages. He needed to relieve the icy hot pain he felt. He needed it out of his body. His mind was racing, going to conclusions that didn’t even make sense, until he lost track of time. The bell for the next period might have rang, but he had no idea. Looking down at his arm, Virgil realized that his long nails had dragged shallow, bloody cuts into his skin.

It made him feel like a failure. He’d made it, what, all of five days without self harm just to break it over a stupid banner design that he was going to get a good grade on anyway!

His shaky hands dug the phone out of his pocket and turned it on. Patton… What the hell is his name?! Patton… Patton Shea! That was his name. Virgil shakily typed out Pat’s name into the google search bar and scrolled through the results, trying to find any of Patton’s social media. He clicked on the fifth link and practically cried with relief at the discovery of Patton’s Instagram. It’d been updated… Yesterday. Good. He used it often, then. And, by the look of it, he replied almost immediately to comments, so he probably had notifications on. Virgil opened the account in the Instagram app, typing out a sloppy DM through his tears.

vintage-misery to patton-cake24 [Read at 9:15 am]

pat i ‘m in t he ba t hroom by teh grph cs romo i’m havnig a panic attackk hlep vriigl

patton-cake24 to vintage-misery [Delivered at 9:15 am]

It’s okay, Virge. I’ll be there in a few minutes, just hang tight, and I’m gonna help you. It’s going to be okay. You’re going to be okay.

Virgil let his phone slip out of his hand, attempting to marginally calm himself down before Patton arrived. It didn’t really work, and before long, a set of footsteps echoed off of the tile walls of the bathroom.

“Virge? You in here? It’s just me, kiddo. Everything’s okay.” Patton’s voice was hesitant, clearly unsure if he was in the right place. Virgil reached up and unlocked the stall door to let Pat in. “Oh thank goodness.”

Tears immediately began to roll down Virgil’s face again. “I-I’m sorry. IreallyfuckedupandIcouldn’tevenmakeitaweekwithouthurtingmyselfI’msuchafuckingfailurePattonwhatdoIdo?” Patton closed the stall door and kneeled in front of his panicking friend.

“Hey, it’s okay. Any recovery comes with relapse, okay? You’re not a failure; you’re just healing.” Pat’s voice was soft and soothing. “Is it okay if I touch you?”

Virgil nodded, and Patton took his hands from his face, gently holding them in his own. “What is your name?”

“I--what?” the crying teenager asked.

“What’s your name?” Patton repeated.

“V-Virgil.”

“Good. Now, what color is your sweatshirt?”

“Grey.”

“Awesome. You’re doing great. Do I wear glasses?”

“Y-yeah. You do.”

“Good. Really good. Now follow my counting. Four beats in, seven beats holding your breath, eight beats out. One, two…”

It only took a few minutes to get Virgil back to a stable state through breathing exercises and rhythmic hand squeezes. Patton had a big smile on his face.

“That was so good, kiddo! I’m really proud of you,” Patton encouraged. The sound of the bell dully rang through the bathroom, and Virgil rushed to stand up. Pat forced him back down.

“I know I just said that was good, but you definitely aren’t in any sort of condition to be rushing around in crowded hallways yet. We’re going to stay right here and make sure you’re a-okay before we leave. I’m going to get you a pass to your next class, okay? I’ll be right back--don’t move.” Patton released his grip on Virgil’s hands and stood up, swiftly striding out of the bathroom. He returned only a minute later with two yellow slips, Virgil’s graphics supplies, and a few tissues. Pat gently wiped the tears away from his friend’s face, making sure not to smear any of the makeup under his eyes.

“Patton…” Virgil didn’t have the words to say what he was feeling. He was sorry for dragging Pat into this mess, but even more sorry for failing to not harm himself for even an entire week.

“Hey, it’s okay. Now, let me see where you’re hurt so it doesn’t get any worse,” Patton ordered, though it was more caring than harsh. Virgil held his left arm out and rolled up the sleeve of his hoodie. The skin just below his elbow had flakes of dry blood on it, following the scrapes that he’d formed. Patton took a roll of gauze he’d taken from the Child Guidance room and wrapped it around the wounds. The gauze wouldn’t exactly help heal anything, but it would prevent unnecessary pain from the sweatshirt rubbing over it.

Once he was done, Patton sat down beside Virgil. “Do you think you could tell me what made you feel so anxious? It’s okay if you can’t, but it’ll help if we know what to avoid in the future.”

“Okay, well,” Virgil groaned, dropping his head in his hands. “God, this is so stupid. I shouldn’t have even panicked about it, but my graphics teacher is really nice and stuff, and she likes my work. So, naturally, she starts to notice that my designs are becoming less me and are more boring. Like, still good enough, but just without the usual feeling in them. And this has been going on for a while, pretty much ever since March when I started to get extremely depressed and anxious. And today I gave her my latest design for a project we were doing, and she told me that it was uninspired and boring, which it was but that’s not the point, and she wasn’t impressed with my work anymore, and it just started to get into my skin that she knew that I was super depressed, and that now it was a big deal. I felt like a giant failure for my designs being lame and I just--It’s stupid. Never mind.” The teen leaned forward to rest his head on his knees. He felt so tired.

Patton spoke up after a moment. “No feelings are stupid, kiddo. I’m sure it was really hard on you to hear what your teacher said, but she obviously just cares about you. Just like I care, hon. Next project, you’re just going to have to channel your emotions into whatever you’re making, and I’m sure it’ll turn out amazing. You’re not a failure in anyone’s eyes. Especially not mine.” Virgil felt his friend’s arms slither around his waist for an awkward hug. A little smile crept on his face from the very Patton gesture.

They sat in the bathroom stall for another couple of minutes before they decided they were good enough to get back to class.

“Give me your phone so you won’t have to find my Instagram again,” Pat said and held his hand out for the phone. Patton quickly typed his number in, sending a text to himself.

Virgil

Delivered at 8:35 am

hey

Patton

Read at 8:35 am

Hey Virge!

Virgil

Delivered at 8:35 am

patton was that really necessary to reply to your own text to yourself

Patton

Read at 8:36 am

It sure was!!!! Let’s get back to class!! :P

Virgil rolled his eyes and slipped his phone back into his pocket. The pair walked out of the bathroom and went their separate ways.

#sanders sides fic #moxiety #logince #m writes things #virgil sanders #patton sanders #logan sanders #roman sanders

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