#a asexual potato

[blackplaaague]

Why would anyone be aphobic? Ace and aro people have done literally nothing wrong in the act of existing.

It's probably because we're so much sexier than everyone but you'll never get us in a relationship with you, aphobes. Y'all haters don't stand a CHANCE against a bag of potato chips.

#ace aro #asexual #aromantic #ace pride #aro pride #pride #aphobia #allonormativity #amatanormativity #potato chippies

[themthistles]

in honor of ace awareness week

#koisenu futari #we are there #be aware #you take a potato and i crawl out from the pile like a cryptid worm #asexual #aromantic #watch this show if you haven't it's so good

[seraphsfire]

...

#date went rly well but it was SO rainy and cold lol. he's really #really sweet and we might hang out again and i think he just kind of asked me out on impulse LOL #no red flags etc we have a lot in common; he's lived in washington and in california for a long time so we got to talk about that #hes a dnd nerd and even with a beard he's even better looking in person which was... very intimidating #i was trying REALLY hard not to stare at his hair but it's like 3 feet long and bright red and smooth and beautiful and #also he has huge brown/hazel eyes and a rly nice smile so i really felt like a potato with bad skin rip #i think he was relieved i wanted to have a sort of low-key and chill hangout instead lol and i think we'll hang out again #but unfortunately bc it was more just like chatting and gettign to know each other i didn't get the chance to be like sooooo im asexual #so im still nervous abt that #and he's so sweet that i feel rly bad if that was a huge disappointment for him :( #anyway #that's how my date went who woulda thought stupid old goblin me would go on a first date with a very beautiful ginger wizard boy at age 32 #tbd

[only-one-brain-cell]

Spencer: why can’t I get a date explain it to me like I’m 5.

Elle: do you ever ask anyone out?

Spencer: no

Elle: that’s why

Spencer: ohhhhhhhhhhhhh

#criminal minds #criminal minds 1x4 #spencer reid #elle greenaway #potato rewatches criminal minds #I love how she said anyone not “ever ask a women out” #biromantic asexual Spencer rights #a very rare Elle compliment from me

[potato-mole]

happy pride month (inspo)

bonus:

#they're proud of their kids #bruce wayne #clark kent #oliver queen #batman #superman #green arrow #connor hawke #tim drake #robin #dc fanart #jon kent #lgbtq+ #asexual #pride month #bisexual #dc pride #dc pride 2022 #batfam #potato draws stuff

[crankalakin]

I have never fell in love with a potato before but oh man today is the day I do holy shit

#they put garlic oil and some herbs n shit on it and omg it's amazing #id fuck this potato #if it wanted to of course #coming form an asexual to #shitpost

[cosmichorrorsarestillnicerthanme]

I choose violence

Being hungry is just being horny for food.

Cannibalism is legal, the only thing that is illegal is how you got it.

Whenever you say goodnight to someone someone else is saying good morning.

you aren't scared of the dark, your scared of not being alone in the dark.

all potatoes (and by extension all foods) are mashed to your stomach.

The person who proofread Hitler's speeches was an actual grammar Nazi.

Asexuals and Succubi would be in the same relationship as that one guy at school who was oblivious to the other person that wanted to fuck them.

#asexuality #shower thoughts #potatoes #i choose violence #succubi #time #perspective

[desidov]

just discovered the skyrim sexyman poll

incorrect

faendal sweep

#skyrim #faendal #skyrim sexyman poll #/lh i love to see everyone have opinions about which potato polygons are the hottest potato polygons #faendal marcurio and miraak are my boyfriends personally but i'm too asexual to understand attractiveness lol

[stackthedeck]

people often say that Peter Parker is the Dick Grayson of Marvel and they could not be more wrong (if Peter is any bat child, he's the Tim Drake) but if editorial isn't going to allow Johnny Storm to be a flaming homosexual, he should be the Dick Grayson of Marvel, where's Johnny's Star Fire?!

#medusa doesn't count because she was mean to him #i don't think he and jen ever officially dated #crystal and kaila and victoria also don't count because they're physically smaller than him #i need an alien woman to throw johnny over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes #if marvel editorial doesn't let johnny suck dick he might as well still get pegged #(i say like i'm not a asexual johnny truther)

[justalitlecreacher]

Updated character sheet for my tiefling bard character

Fun fact: They got the tattoos after drinking a mysterious potion and now every spell they cast has a 35% of wild magic

#tiefling #bard #dnd #character sheet #last session they turned themself into a potato while trying to cast a healing spell #ALSO! #they're aroace like me b/c when i was trying to think of what class i wanted them to be #i thought that it would be really funny to be an asexual bard

[edthefatmagicturtle]

Please hire me as an assassin, I promise I won’t fall in love with my mark, the last thing that I called sexy was cheesy mashed potatoes.  

#assassins #asexual #mashed potatoes #cheese #cheesy mashed potatoes

[malevolententity]

i am a few days late, but it is time to listen to til desth do us blart 22. but i Have taken a melatonin and will pass out soon, will report in 8 hours on if my dreams got fucky

#can not be any worse than my dream last night which was the most asexual sex dream ive ever had of just #'yeah m not really into this and ur tongue feels like a potato can we like be done' and then i woke up #gonns use that dream to remind myself in the future anytime i have doubts that in the dreamscape where anything good could happen i dreamed #instead about the worst sex possible barring actual horrific experiences

[bettyist]

being traumatized is crazy because what do you mean i can't look at default hatsune miku without my stomach turning

#can barely consume vocaloid media that i used to LOVE #want to throw up when i see a specific PLANT OUTSIDE. #its so over for me. #kind of joking not really #&then theres stuff directly related to what she did to me #which is what made me sick this morning #it just feels like whenever im okay and moved on something hits me again and i remember then i spiral #its really hard okay just likeidk #ive been getting passed around like hot potato from sex ofdender to sex offender sijce i was like 8 #and it really fucks with you and your sense of self ajd purpose and wortg #im like “asexual” not born that way but i will probably never feel safe doing that #all i seek in this mortal plane is to love and be loved why did all yhis shit have to happen #vent #<- gonna start tagging these becauseidk i feel bad not tagging sorr.y

[nymphenberger]

help

#I'm too old #Or too asexual or too depressed #It's all the same potato potatoe #like ahhhh

[indecisive--introvert]

What does it mean when I (cis female) see a buff man and all I think about is that I wish I were that buff?

#hm #but also I'm a couch potato #asexual #lol #body goals