Tumgik
#a beard i'd like to scratch
chaneajoyyy · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
🥲🥲
315 notes · View notes
Text
Look at this 'lil cutie smiling in the background🥰🥰🥰
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
14 notes · View notes
heartbeetz · 9 months
Text
99% sure I made this post before but I'm thinking about it again. I like that so many people (myself included) decided Anton is the romantic type. Based on nothing. We're right though. ♡
4 notes · View notes
Text
Who wears the pants. || husband!John Price
[MASTERLIST]
Rating: M Words: 3.4K without the extra!! (this one got away from me, I'm sorry.) Pairing: husband!John x wife!reader CW: quick smut!, yelling mentioned, slightly dubcon (if you squint), john got angry and jealous Tags: you/your pronouns, afab!reader, smut, fingering-ish, slight exhibitionism, love bites and marks, established relationship, jealous!john price, anger mentioned, ghost's stirring the pot. Summary: John is embarrassed of the fact you 'wear the pants' in your relationship... But only after the lads come to stay over and a snarky comment from Simon, does he decide to show you what's what. a/n: my first attempt at writing smut that I wanted to post... Also Ghost/Simon is a dick in this one...
Tumblr media Tumblr media
John simultaneously is and is not ashamed to say how much he loves you. 
Of course, he loves you to bits, finds you the most stunning woman he’s ever seen, and would kill and die for you in a heartbeat. His love was the epitome of “If I ever were to lose you, I'd surely lose myself.”
However, he would never risk introducing you to his teammates. Not if he can avoid it. And not just because he cares about you and wants to keep you away from prying eyes, safe and sound in your family home…
More like… they don’t need to know how John purrs when you scratch his beard right beneath his chin and whisper sweet nothings into his ear. They don’t need to see how his pupils almost morph into hearts equally if he sees you in one of his shirts, or in your work clothes, or in joggers and a sweaty t-shirt, or a sexy little number, or nude…
And they especially don’t need to know that their tough-as-nails Captain figuratively rolls over and bares his neck in submission when in the presence of his wife… Or that your voice is like a goddamn foghorn making him genuinely quake in a way he hasn’t since he was a boy at Sandhurst, getting yelled at by drill sergeants… 
He hasn’t left the toilet seat up in 12 years. Hasn’t tracked mud into your shared home (whose floors you had just mopped!) in 10. Hasn’t eaten the last of your snacks or used the last of the tea bags without replacing it in 6. 
There is no weaponized incompetence in your home because you know John is not incompetent and you will not allow him to feign being it to make you his maid. You take care of him and your home, and you refuse to let him disrespect you in any way… And he knows better than to try.
His teammates have no idea how hopelessly in love he is with you. With the way you seize control from him in a way he allows no one else to. Not his soldiers, not the rest of his family. He’s been the ‘man’ of the house in all aspects for as long as he can remember… But that stops the moment he crosses the threshold of the front door, hangs his coat and his gear in the hall closet, and pads through the home in search of you. 
He always finds you busying yourself with something or other and you beckon him close like a puppy, with a pat on the chair next to yours as you work at the dining table, or a come hither motion of the fingers as you water the plants, or reach your arms out for a hug as you stand atop a ladder halfway through repainting the accent wall in the living room. He always hugs and burrows himself in you, inhaling your scent, basking in your warmth, leaving kisses and touches in every inch of exposed skin.
He’s not embarrassed of you, he’ll gladly shout out to the world about his love for you. But he’s embarrassed by how he acts around you. Soap and Gaz would tell him he’s “whipped” if they ever knew what you do to him. So he doesn’t want them to meet you.
But he doesn’t have a choice. December 23rd, at 11 P.M., he and the lads have just touched down from a mission. The weather forecast speaks of a rainstorm and severe weather warnings extending right over Christmas… And John knows what he must do.
So disgruntled, your husband walks off to his office and calls you. In a low tone of voice, almost hushed, because he woke you up, he grumbles about the storm, about how Soap won’t be able to drive up to Scotland for Christmas, that Gaz can probably risk driving to Birmingham, but it’s still pretty unsafe, and that Ghost, as usual, was going to lock himself in his quarters on base and drink himself until he passes out…
You don’t need to be told again. You spring into action immediately. You simply reply that you’re getting up and getting the guest rooms ready, asking if one of the lads would mind getting the pull-out sofa in John’s study, and telling John to drive safe, that the roads are dangerous with the rain… 
It’s midnight when you hear the front door opening, and the hall light turns on, flooding the space with a bright warm-toned yellow-ish light. “Shoes off, you lot. The missus doesn’t want water or mud inside.” He demands in a gruff tone.
As they go about unzipping coats and undoing their muddy boots, you can hear John still chastising them. “I’ll stress again: I want you on your best behaviour. No work talk, no cursing, no disrespect. The missus is doin’ you a favour.” He adds as if the poor lads are children who cannot be trusted to be polite.
Unbeknownst to you, he had already spent the whole drive over from base warning them about picking up after themselves, about being respectful to you, about putting the toilet seat down, about making their beds… reaming them out as if they were wild animals who had never once been inside a house and would break and dirty up everything they touch.
You move to stand at the step that separates the lowered entryway from the sitting room, silently observing them, arms crossed as you lean your shoulder against the wall, wearing a robe and your house slippers as you look at them.
They’re all taller than you, moving surprisingly efficiently and quietly, trying not to disturb the peaceful home too much. They’re dripping wet, probably from rushing from the car in the driveway up to the front stoop. A set of four backpacks or duffle bags are on the floor by the door, their clothes for the days they’ll spend here inside.
“Give them a break, Jonathan, you can keep bossing them around in the morning, love.” You quip and you immediately feel all their backs stiffen, four pairs of eyes glued to you.
“Hi, lovie…” John says, already crossing the small entryway to wrap his arms around your waist, dropping a deep open-mouthed kiss to your awaiting lips. Your hand touches his face, caressing his cheek over his mutton chops.
“Steamin’ Jesus, the Captain’s got taste…” You hear a voice murmur, followed by a sharp ‘ow, what was that fo’?’ which causes both you and John to look at the other soldiers. The offending man, the shortest, with a mohawk, rubs at his arm, which seems to indicate the tallest one on his left side smacked him into shutting his mouth.
You don’t need to be told who’s who to realize that it was ‘Ghost’ who smacked ‘Soap’, while ‘Gaz’ stands on Soap’s other side and shoots John an apologetic look. He told you everything about them, without ever revealing names or pictures, for you to know more about them than you should. John himself as his lips pressed together, his mouth nearly disappearing behind his mustache, as he glares at the lads (aka Soap) for making comments about you.
You quickly approach the three men. “You must be the lads my husband talks so much about!” You say with a chuckle. “It’s a pleasure to finally meet the men responsible for bringing my John home in one piece every time…” You tell them gratefully while shaking each of their hands with two of your own, your eyes shining a bit.
“Please, come in!” You gesture behind you into the home as you flick the sitting room lights on. “John, will you show them their rooms while I put the kettle on?” You ask your husband as you slink into the kitchen. 
A few muffled footsteps, created by socked feet, are heard as they walk inside, with John directing the boys to the different bedrooms (and study), and you hear a gruff voice murmur something about taking the pull-out sofa. You assume it’s Ghost.
Your husband then comes to hug you around the waist as you wait for the water to boil, dropping kisses to your temple and cheek, doting on you while his big, calloused hands squeeze at every part of you, your thighs, especially, but your tummy as well, along with gentle words. “I missed you so much, lovie…” “Thank you for doing this…” “You know, I can never sleep right without you in my arms…” “Just missed you so much…”
Five minutes later, you hear their steps coming back as you’re finishing pouring the water into a few separate mugs. Your husband dislodges his arms from around you. He doesn’t need the others to see he’s so crazy about you. 
“Your home is beautiful, Mrs. Price.” Gaz says as you set the tea mugs, the sugar, and the milk within their reach on the island counter. He takes one of the mugs and tops it off with some milk. The way the young boy calls you ‘Mrs. Price’ has nothing if not respect dripping from it. 
It makes you tingle on the inside, even after so many years, the realization that you’re John’s wife, John’s choice, John’s priority. Your husband preens himself a bit when he catches the look in your eye. He loves that you’re his, of course, but loves it even more that you like being his.
“Thank you, Gaz. I’m glad you like it.” You remark with a smile as you sip your own tea. Herbal, different from theirs, so you can resume your sleep which John interrupted with his phone call. 
“Aye, real cosy!” Soap quips from beside him as he slides up to a stool on the island. He doesn’t drink tea, so you didn’t prepare any, per John’s request.
“I hope the beds are to your liking… I kinda made them in a hurry.” You quip, which causes the boys, and your husband, to laugh, as they seat themselves across from you, in the bar stools. You barely even noticed Ghost taking the last cuppa and sliding up next to Johnny, his mask rolled up just enough to allow him to drink.
“We’re soldiers, ma’am, we’ll sleep anywhere,” Gaz told you, ever polite, with a sweet smile on his lips. John has told you all about Gaz, his protegé, of sorts, a respectful lad, the youngest, but one that has proved himself to be useful.
Your eyes flitter over to John for a moment, watching as he drinks his tea, two fingers laced through the handle of his navy blue mug, rather than around him, his behind leaning back on the counter beside you. While doing that, however, you miss the glances the lads exchange with each other, and then to you.
“As true as that might be…” You trail off after sipping your tea and look back at the soldiers again. “I still hope you have some good rest. And, I’m sorry about the pull-out sofa… it’s a bit old, came from John’s old apartment… Has gotta be a decade old now.” You quip as you look toward Ghost.
“It’s alright. I’ll sleep fine.” Ghost says. “Like Gaz said, we can sleep wherever.” He adds.
Soap nods along. “Anything’s better than sleeping on the ground with your rifle between your legs and your jacket folded up to serve as an eyemask.” He adds and laughs.
“Johnny.” Your husband calls out, chastising him. “No work talk.”
“Aw, c’mon, Captain, that hardly counts as work talk.” He retorts with a little boyish grin.
“Them’s the rules. No bloody talk about service.” John insists.
“John.” You scold him, and your husband stiffens next to you, his eyes flittering over to you, eyebrows scrunched and his eyes softened as he meets your eye… nothing short of a puppy.
It was stronger than John at this point, to respond to your tone of voice with nothing but a baring of his neck, not a baring of his teeth like he would with anyone else. The boys all noticed it, the way his shoulders sagged and his eyes looked at you with utter devotion.
“Let the boys talk about work. As long as it’s nothin’ too gory or confidential…” You trail off. “I’m sure I’ll enjoy ‘earing all the stories they have to tell about you at work... Right, lads?” You ask as you look at them again.
“Oh, we’ve got stories alright.” Soap says with a giggle and a wagging of his brows, which causes Gaz and Ghost to snicker under his breath.
“Well, then, regale me with them during Christmas dinner, ye?” You ask them, to which they nod along with smiles. You could swear even Ghost had one in the corner of his scarred lips.
After a bit more small talk, you kissed John goodnight, while he told you he’d stay downstairs and talk with the lads a little longer, so you waved at them while trekking your way upstairs, the boys once more thanking you for the hospitality.
The moment John’s trained ears honed into the fact the bedroom door has closed, he finishes his tea and glares at the lads.
“Don’t be bloody flirtin’ with my wife.” He tells Soap directly, though his comment extends to Gaz and Ghost as well, which is why he glances to both sides at the other two.
“Sir?” Gaz asks while blinking.
“You ‘eard me, Garrick.” He adds and points a finger at the young Sergeant. 
“We’re not flirtin’, sir.” Soap tries to defend himself.
“Aw, that’s rich that there, MacTavish, yeah.” Your husband says bluntly.
“Weren’t flirting.” Ghost retorts as he looks at John. “I was more so interested in the way she has your balls in her little purse.” He adds.
Both Soap and Gaz turn to look at Ghost with eyes so wide you’d think he just tried to kill the Captain directly… and he might as well have, the way John choked on nothing and started coughing up a lung.
The other two are trying to muffle their chuckles and hide their smirks as Simon continues. “Don’t give me that look, boss. We all saw it. Pretty thing might as well be walking you around on a lead.”
“Nonsense.” John says defensively as he snatches the cups of tea from the island and turns to deposit them all in the kitchen sink. He starts washing them quickly, shoulders stiffened.
“Bunk down.” John demands. “We’ve got plenty to do tomorrow.” He adds. The light screeching of bar stools being pulled back and pushed back into place is heard, as the boys vacate the kitchen with curt ‘Goodnight, sir’ murmured before they headed upstairs as well.
“Balls in her bloody purse, my arse.” John grumbles under his voice as he finishes doing the dishes, drying his hands, and then setting them on the island across from him, head hung in shame.
He knows Simon’s right. Hell, he revels in the fact you’ve got metaphorical balls of steel to confront him, to steal control right from under him, to wear the pants in the relationship. Lord knows it took him years to meet a woman who could not only keep up with him but put him in his place…
So why does it embarrass him so to hear them snicker at that fact? Why does it annoy him to look weak for you in front of his men? Why does it anger him that he loves to be weak for you?
Those are the thoughts in his head as he turns off the sitting room and kitchen lights and marches upstairs... And as he approaches your bedside in the dark, pulling the covers out from atop of you, exposing your body to him.
Under that robe you came to welcome them in, you were only wearing one of his t-shirts and no pants whatsoever, which he had peeped by the way your bare legs had shown through the slit between the two sides of the fabric whenever you walked.
“John?” You ask him in surprise, his breath is a bit ragged, more so huffing like a bull through his nose, as he grabs you and pulls you up into his arms, only to drop you on the bed further in the middle of the bed.
The giggle that escaped you when he did so annoyed him even more. He’s angry, pissed that he had been humiliated in front of his men, that you had humiliated him by merely existing and going about your relationship with him the way you always did…
So why are you giggling? Is he really that weak for you that you’ve grown to not fear his anger?
He grabs the hem of his shirt and yanks it up and over your head, tossing it to the side before he attacks your neck with nothing but kisses and bites, his hands touching your naked body, rough skin dragging over every inch of the softness he has left on display.
“John!” You giggle some more as he keeps touching and kissing you, his body weighing down on yours, your legs parted to accommodate him. “We can’t… We have guests!” You try to negotiate as his fingers dig into the pudge of your thighs and slide around to grip a greedy handful of your ass.
You still haven’t spotted the anger in him… And, as such, your playful attempts at negotiating postponing sex only annoy him more. You’re still trying to call the shots…
His left hand wraps around your face, quieting you with a strong palm holding your lips, his fingers digging into your jaw on either side. “You’re mine.” That’s all he says as his fingers continue exploring your body.
“You think you can embarrass me like that in front of the blokes?” He asks you in a whisper as his teeth catch your earlobe and suck and bite at it. “Hm?” He beckons, his tone aggressive. “Make me look like a big girl’s blouse in front of my subordinates?” He continues.
A shiver runs down your spine as his free hand wraps around the waistband of your underwear and yanks it off, down your legs, tossing them to a random spot, barely giving you time to react before his fingers drag up your thigh.
“You think you’re oh-so-box-clever, innit?” He asks you as his fingers slowly drag across your slit, finding your clit effortlessly, years of practice aiding in his torturing of you. You find yourself moaning and sighing against his hand, hips stuttering a bit, your feet looking for a perch at the edge of the bed so you can rub yourself into his hand.
“Walking around in just my shirt and those knickers and stupid bloody robe, making my boys see how lucky I am to have you, make them jealous… Only to embarrass me, make me look weak…” He trails off and tuts loudly, his tongue clicking disdainfully.
The things he’s saying make no sense to you. You didn’t try to seduce his friends, and you sure as hell didn’t try to embarrass him! It’s just the way you always act around him, around the house. He’s never complained, in fact, he’s praised you plenty of times for being ‘perfect’ for him… So where did this change of his come from?
Frankly, you don’t know, but you don’t care… It has been weeks since you were last together, sure, but you know that’s not the main reason why you’re loving this. The unbridled rage in his voice, combined with the way his experienced fingers touch your body, is making you feel things John’s never made you feel before. Your mind is clear of nothing if not a pang of hunger for him, your hands gently pawing at his shoulders atop his charcoal grey t-shirt, soft whimpers muffled by the hard palm pressing you into silence, into submission.
“I’m afraid I’ve let you gone unchecked for too long, lovie...” He grunts in your ear as his fingers draw circles against your clit, the rough pads catching at the throbbing bud, making you whine and whimper, your whole body shuddering against him. “I’m going to fix that attitude of yours...” He clicks his tongue again, sounding all the more annoyed.
“Now you’re going to be good f’r me…” He says as he uncovers your mouth, his hand, wet with saliva, slipping from atop your mouth to grab your wrists and pin them above your head, flush to the mattress. “And make the lads know exactly who’s in charge in here. Clear their doubts...”
[MASTERLIST]
Tumblr media
extra: 500 words-ish
The next morning, you wake up before John, as usually tends to happen when he comes back from a mission. The silence and lack of stress, the warmth of you in his arms, the cosy atmosphere of the house… It’s all the perfect sedative to keep him as good as dead for many, many hours. You slip out of his embrace and check the clock… it was just past 9 A.M. You pad quietly to the hall bathroom after fishing out a change of clothes from the wardrobe, and rinse off the sweat from the night before, as well as the dried slick and cum between your thighs. You’re still unstable on your feet, your thighs and the space between them deliciously sore, your body covered in marks of the night you spent in your husband’s arms… You feel like you’re floating as you drift downstairs and into the kitchen…  “Fuckin’ hell!” You jump, startled. In your kitchen, pouring himself a cup of tea is Ghost… You think. The height seems about right, though you didn’t expect a broad-shoulder, bare-chested blond in your kitchen. “Good morning.” You say softly as you shuffle inside, hearing him return that same greeting in a way-too-deep of a voice, standard of man who’s just woken up. “Go put a shirt on, this isn’t the beach.” You scold him, as you open the fridge, looking for the eggs. Your voice is as fierce as it usually tends to be with John. When he doesn’t reply, you look over at him, noticing his mask is missing. You assume John scolded him about it, how you’d likely be startled by seeing a masked man in the night. The look in Ghost’s eyes is unreadable, stern, unwavering, and eerily calm, as if he’s seeing through you. They flit over you, up and down, with a certain glint you can’t quite decipher. You straighten your back in the face of his look, portraying nothing if not confidence. Ghost leans against the counter, one hand holding his tea cup and sipping from it, the other resting on the counter to support his weight, before one of his eyebrows shoots up. “Nice night, huh?” He asks you and, immediately, you feel your entire confidence bleed out of you, your eyes widening like saucers. Of course he heard it… You’re sure all the lads heard you, especially considering John and you started right as they had gotten to their respective rooms to sleep, all of which were located in the same hallway as the master bedroom… It’d surprise you if they hadn’t… Hell, it’d surprise you if the neighbors across the way didn’t! The way John had you last night, crying out his name at the top of his lungs and making you apologise repeatedly for something you didn’t even do (on purpose) definitely leaked through the walls… Just like the shame you currently feel leaks through your pores. You turn away to fix your eyes on the fridge, too embarrassed to face him again after realizing he knows. Your brain rushes to find something to distract you, to hide what you feel… “Are you hungry?” You end up asking softly.
924 notes · View notes
lovings4turn · 1 month
Text
★ hedgehog . . . (oscar piastri)
— when he reunites with his girlfriend, oscar quickly learns that his attempt at a new look has one huge downfall
+ aka. becca saw the pics of oscar's new stubble and struggled to be normal about it !! very short n sweet n silly, but i hope you enjoy regardless lovelies <3 banner from cafekitsune !!
Tumblr media
"hey bab- oh."
oscar pulls away from your hug with a confused expression, brows furrowed and bottom lip pulled into the slightest pout. he looks down at you and scans your face, before turning his scrutiny onto his own form, trying to find an answer for your unusual reaction.
you haven't seen oscar in about a week now, and normally, you're all over him, not an inch of his face nor neck left untouched with your kisses. yet you're currently standing in front of him with an almost dazed expression on your face, arms still linked around his neck from your hug.
before he can open his mouth and allow a nervous question to trickle from his lips, you speak up for him, your knuckles coming to graze against his jaw.
"this is new," you hum, tilting your hand to grant your pinky finger the chance to trace the growing stubble that dusts oscar's upper lip.
his nose scrunches, and his amused exhale hits your fingertips as he lets out a laugh at the tickle.
"how have you hidden this from me?" you continue, your voice taking on a teasing tone. "been on facetime to you almost every day and i didn't even notice."
oscar lifts his own hand to scratch at his jaw, the feeling of coarse hair against his fingertips becoming more familiar with each passing day. it's by no means a full beard, god no. it's glorified stubble, scruff you might have called it. but it's the most facial hair you've seen oscar with since... well, ever.
"yeah, i'm uh, trying something out, i guess," he says with a slight laugh, looking down at you to gauge your reaction. "couldn't be bothered to shave one night and just thought i'd see what it was like."
though his tone is casual, his heart pounds a little faster as he tries to detect any form of opinion radiating from your body language. oscar wishes he was a mind reader right now, able to tell exactly how you feel about the slight stubble without having to ask you outright.
the answer seems to satisfy you, and your lips curve up into a smile as you lean in to finally pepper soft kisses to his face.
oscar stoops down a little to grant you access to his forehead and temple, and you press another kiss to his nose before moving to attach your lips to his.
the kiss is tender, full of love, and bordering on passionate as oscar's tongue swipes at your bottom lip in a silent question. he hardly realises you're pulling away until he's forced to chase after your lips unsuccessfully.
his breathing is a little shallow as he speaks.
"why'd you stop?"
the question almost comes out as a whine, and it takes a lot for you not to tease him about it.
"y'scratching me a bit," you admit with an amused tone, nibbling at your bottom lip. "y'know, with the hair. 's a bit like i'm kissing a hedgehog" you clarify, rubbing at the skin of your own top lip as if to add emphasis.
oscar's mouth opens in a silent oh, and you can practically see the cogs turning in his mind as he puts two and two together. coarse hair plus friction against your own skin is definitely not an award winning combination for you, and oscar sees no more need for experimentation.
"gimme a minute to shave this off, sweetheart," oscar promises with a crooked grin, already making his way to the bathroom. "then you can give me a proper kiss, hm?"
882 notes · View notes
nomercyanywhere · 4 months
Text
gojo wears a santa outfit :3
ー ー ー ー ー
the first time you saw it, you thought it was stupid. your husband dressed in that bright red jacket with the front open, exposing his abs. it was weird! usually it was an old man who wore that outfit. but seeing toru in it was different.
*sigh* "what are you.. wearing?" you walked into the living room, wanting to decorate the tree. but gojo had other plans, the sleeves hugged tightly around his arms, looking like if he flexed even a little they'd burst. "what? it looks great on me right? i even got you one~!" he happily showed you the same outfit, just in a smaller size, "i mean, kinda but why-" you scratched the back of your head, "to feel the christmas spirit!"... "but your missing the beard." you pointed at his face. "it came with one actually but i figured i'd just look weird with it, so i didn't wear it ^^"..."isn't that too small for you?" you tried to pull both sides to get it zipped. "i guess? but don't you like it~?" what a tease, his pecs and abs were exposed. not to mention his v-line, as well as the feint white hairs peeking from his waistband of his pants. "... you look stupid.."
he carries you to the bedroom and sets you on the bed. he pulls out a tiny box, wrapped in some reflective paper.
"here baby" he hands it to you, all giddy and excited. you chuckle at his excitement, and to your surprise, it was.. a onesie? a.. babies onesie. "w-what's this for?" your face was brighter than his shirt "for our baby! i got you that and one other gift~"... you pulled out baby bottles, toys, tiny socks and what not. my was he prepared. "but.. im not preg-", "THAT'S my other gift"... he flashes you a '^w^' before taking the baby stuff away.
your ankles crammed into the headboard. grabbing and pulling on the sheets and blankets while he railed you till you go dumb.
"oh fuck.. sorry sweet boy, but y've been naughty this year~" one of his hand held both your legs and pressed them against the headboard while the other played with your cute nipples. "look at this sloppy cunt.. takin' me soooo well" he pinched your clit with his middle and index fingers, then spat on it, spreading his spit all over your already messy pussy. "ah.. you ready for your last gift? huh? take it 'kay? been savin' up aaaall this cum just for today yaknow? so take it all in honey~".
ー ー ー ー ー
a/n: :3 another pwegnancy fic... HHIHHHI.. im sorry 😔
649 notes · View notes
neverinadream · 5 months
Text
The Voice Of An Angel
Tumblr media
Summary: A brief moment to talk as they catch their breaths.
Pairing: Mason Mount x Fem!Reader
Requested: Nope
Song Inspo: Work Song - Hozier
Warnings: use of she/her pronouns, 18+, minors dni, smut/suggestive language, pre-established relationship, soft dom!mason, sub!reader, husband!mason, talks of previous oral sex, breeding kink but if you blink you'll miss it, unprotected sex, not edited and only a short blurb
Notes: original gif by @bracedes surprise!! posting three days in a row? yeah, i'm surprised too, but here's a little thing that's more happier than yesterday's heartbreak. its short but would people like an extended version of it?? anyways, feedback is always appreciated
“I want to go back,” Y/N confesses, stroking her fingers over Mason's cheek as they both sort out a moment to catch their breath. His beard had been trimmed for their wedding but still scratched her. Turning his head, he brushes a gentle kiss to the inside of her wrist, liking the way she smiles as his lips come into contact with her soft skin. “Go back to this morning,” she continues, humming as he continued to kiss along her arm, stopping when he reached her shoulder, “me in my dress, you with that look on your face as I walked down the aisle, the happiness, your terrible dancing-”
“My dancing was not terrible,” he interrupts her, his laugh muffled by the curve of her neck. He staggers open-mouthed kisses against the column of her neck, breathing in the sweet scent that clung to her skin. She whimpers, feeling his tongue drag against her pulse point, teeth nipping to leave another mark. The soft sound shoots straight to his cock, new life stirring as his body grinds into hers. “But, I agree,” he mumbles, giving her neck one last kiss, “I would love to go back and do it all again with you.” A cheeky grin creeps across his face, not going unmissed as he dips his head to kiss her collarbone. “I'd like to go back to an hour ago, when you screamed my name as I shoved my tongue in and out of your pussy."
“You're so predictable.” A sharp gasp sounds as he sucks on her collarbone, moaning at the taste of her skin.
“Every part of you tastes so good,” he groans, prying himself away from her body, “did you know that?”
“I think you've said that once or twice.”
He goes quiet, chest rising and falling as he takes a deep breath. His whole world was underneath him, just there for his taking. His hand slides down her naked frame, his hand moulding to the curve of her hip. Their bodies were a tangled mess underneath the honeymoon suite sheets, coated with a thin layer of sweat and the smell of sex sticking to them.
“You were so beautiful today,” his voice lowers to a whisper, “you always are, but today…today, when you walked down that aisle, I stopped breathing.” He drops his forehead against hers, bringing his hand up to her face, framing her cheek. “You looked like an angel,” he adds, nuzzling his nose against hers. He shifted his weight, her eyes snapping open to meet his darkened gaze as his cock presses against the inside of her thigh. “Sounded like one too as you came on my cock and begged me to pump you full of my cum.”
Travelling south, his hand presses softly against her neck, his mouth dancing against hers. “Mason,” she whimpers at the pressure, sliding her hand down between their bodies. She wraps her hand around his shaft, pumping him from root to tip, catching the way he subtly bucks into her hand and moans into her mouth.
“Will you sound like an angel for me again?” He asks, guiding his cock inside, her hand gripping his bicep as her sensitive walls stretch around him. He bottoms out, giving her a second to catch her breath. “Ready?” He dips to kiss the corner of her mouth. “Good,” he mumbles as she nods, “because I'm not stopping until you, my angelic wife, are begging me to stop."
———————
Football Taglist: @shanoontje @maseandkepa @theblxefox @blueathens  @ofxinnocence @mrschilly @geek-and-proud @in-my-body-bag @laurasstufff1 @mountchilly @spicysainz @thoseboysinblue @kickinganddriving @lizzypotter14 @bracedes @chilwellspulisic @notsoattractivearenti @swimmingismywholelife @lovelynikol16 @masonsrem @landoslover @kathb59 @emcv1427 @gagaslonina @afterpills @pulisicsgirl
503 notes · View notes
immajustvibehere · 4 months
Text
Amidst a Crashing World (3/5)
Pairing: Arthur Morgan x fem!Reader
Summary: Arthur returns to your cabin after you presumed him dead. The time between your last meetings have lead Arthur to a realisation.
tags for this series: fluff, little bit of angst, no-tb-Arthur, literally your love redemption, maybe smut (but probably not), slow burn (but I mean how slow can a story really burn in five chapters?)
masterlist
Chapter 1, Chapter 2
6000 words
Tumblr media
Sooner than expected, you heard of Arthur. Unfortunately, not because he sent you a note or stopped by again. As you rode into Annesburg three days after wishing him luck for the big score he had planned, the paper boys yelled through the town: "Saint Denis robbers still on the run! What happened to the gang of Dutch van der Linde? Find out in today's edition!"
Normally, you weren't too big on reading the newspaper, but this time…you hadn't never snatched it so quickly out of the boy's hand, leaving him to boast with the change you gave him. Hosea, dead. Lenny, dead. No account of any other names. You weren't sure who "a further gang member was arrested and awaits trial" meant. It only took a couple of days until everybody seemed to talk about it. Your main source of income being doing women's hair, you got a fair bit of gossip about the news.
Everything you heard from the ladies, took with a grain of salt. Either way, nobody ever mentioned Arthur by name. Your anxiety reached its peak when a rather well-off woman, not typically your demographic, had visited family in Saint Denis and brought an unsettling theory with her. Apparently, the most important members of the gang, including the leader, could have fled on a boat and drowned in the storm that was raging over the ocean the same night.
The "they have fled the country"-rumours were the most popular. Drowned in the ocean or not, the version varied based on who told you their theory. With every day you didn't hear the contrary and had no word from Arthur, you believed that you'd never see him again.
That was until one morning. You were working in your garden, busy with fixing the fence that had long stood neglected, when you saw a rider approach. Whether it was the hat or the horse you recognized first, you weren’t sure. But unmistakenly, the man on the horse that lazily trotted towards your cabin was Arthur.
You put your tools down and approached him, forcing yourself to walk calmly. The closer you got, the more unfamiliar he appeared. His beard had grown out, looking unkempt and way too long for what you were used to see him wear. Long strands of hair spilled out from under his hat. Arthur’s skin was darker than usual, even the unforgiving desert in the west hadn't left his skin as sunburned as it now appeared. Most of the red had settled into a golden-brown tan, particularly strong around the area where he cuffed his sleeves. For not seeing him for almost a month, this was quite a change.
A faint smile appeared on his lips when you reached him and walked next to his horse, leading it to your cabin.
"I thought I'd never see you again", you blurted out straight up.
Maybe a “Hello” or “Thanks for stopping by” would have been more appropriate, but the thought that had driven you insane the last three to four weeks just slipped out.
"I know. I'm sorry", Arthur jumped off his horse when you had reached your newly fixed gate. He looked at you, trying to take it all in. He had missed you; he had thought of you so much the last days and weeks, having you in front of him was a little overwhelming. But you looked like he remembered you. You weren’t wearing your fine clothes that you had worn when you caught him in your pond, but the worn jeans and shirt that had seen many fences painted and potted many plants looked good on you. It looked homely.
Arthur cleared his throat before he asked, "D'ya still cut hair?"
It was awkward...the ways he pronounced his question, the uncomfortable manner in which he scratched his way too long beard, seemingly unhappy with its new length.
Before you could answer, he added sarcastically: "Tried finding a barber on the Caribbean island but didn't came across someone I wanted to trust with scissors."
"Caribbean island?", you repeated questioningly, leading him into the cabin.
The tension between you felt peculiar. If tension were a tangible thing, you could have thrown a lasso and seemingly strangled it out of the air. But it wasn’t, so you and Arthur only struggled with finding your rhythm again.
"I came as soon as I could after returning...", Arthur explained apologizing, as if he had to rectify not visiting you sooner.
"Arthur. I thought you were dead", in front of your table, you stopped and looked directly at the man.
"'m afraid I have to disappoint", he chuckled, "Instead I'm here, asking ya for a cheap haircut because we lost...ten thousands in the sea."
"Ugh", you groaned, readying a chair for Arthur to sit on right at the table, "You sound so desperate, I might just give ya that haircut for free."
Arthur placed his jacket on a hinge next to the door and his hat on a free spot on the table. Again, it felt like he knew exactly where to place them, just as if he was coming home after a workday.
"Where d'ya want me, miss?", Arthur asked politely as if he had just entered a barber shop and there wasn't only one chair that looked prepared enough to serve as seat for his cut. You pointed at the chair a little absentmindedly, gathering your equipment and laying it out in the table in front of you.
"How short were you thinking?", you asked, walking around the seated man, ruffling his hair a little.
"Whatever you prefer", Arthur answered.
"What's that supposed to mean?", you asked, letting your finger scrape through his hair. His hair was wet at the roots, so you added surprisedly, "Did you just take a bath?"
"Might 've...", Arthur shrugged as if it was no big deal.
"You didn’t have to”, you reassured him, secretly amused by how endearing you found it.
"You wouldn't say that if you’d seen me before the bath. After three days in the Caribbean, killing half of the Pinkerton's agency and moving camp, you would have shot me on sight", Arthur joked, a bitter smile playing on his lips. Your answer was a soft chuckle.
After combing his hair, you repeated you question: "You're sure you don't want me to tell you how you want your hair done?"
"I trust ya", Arthur said.
"Mh, big mistake", you grinned. You caught Arthur's eye for a moment, and you could have sworn it was admiration in his expression. And trust, which honestly, was seldom for this man.
"I'll just cut it a little shorter than you had it when you first came to collect me", you said, waiting for his confirmation.
"...collect you and failed miserably at that", Arthur added.
"I thank the lord every day for that", you said jokingly. It was no laughing matter, though. You knew that as well as Arthur. The list of people the gang had lost in the last two months was long and you not rejoining was probably the only thing that had kept your name off that list.
You started doing Arthur's hair and one minute in, you decided to carefully pose the question of "What the hell happened the last couple weeks?". Arthur couldn't stop talking. He explained the plan of the bank robbery, explained when it went south. When Hosea was mentioned, he digressed a little. You too ended up sharing some anecdotes of the old man. You had loved him and felt a pang of guilt that you hadn't sent word to him that you were indeed fine. Hosea had been so kind to you when you expressed your wish to be on your own for a while, he had wished you the best and you had never even thought about sending a letter.
Then Arthur mentioned escape from Saint Denis. Your mouth went dry when Arthur recounted the storm, how he went overboard, nearly drowning and not knowing how lucky he was that he washed ashore on a beach. It was uncanny how some of the rumours you had heard mirrored the actual story.
Then came Guarma and everything that happened there. The return, the Pinkertons apparently following someone to Lagras and finally the move to Beaver's Hollow. They had been up there for a couple a couple of days now, and so much had already happened.
You listened, occasionally asked a question, but most of the time you were concentrating on not messing up the haircut. You had never heard Arthur talk that much before. Sober, that is. He can be quite a chatty drunk, but it seemed like he just wanted to get everything off his chest.
"How does that look?", you asked when you were done with his hair, holding a little mirror for Arthur to see.
His only response was a nob and a slight smile.
"Okay then", you spoke gently, "your beard's next."
The whole retelling of the last couple of weeks was what Arthur needed, but it killed his mood the same time. At least, that's what you though he was silent for. You cleared a spot on the table for you to sit on. It was way more comfortable sitting in front of Arthur while trimming his beard, but if you sat on a chair, you wouldn't have the height you needed.
You took a seat on the table in front of Arthur and noticed how his eyes immediately fixed on the ground.
"D'ya mind spreading your legs a little?", you asked. Despite the request confusing him a little, Arthur did as he was told and you put your on foot on his chair, so you wouldn't topple forward. Arthur tried his best to stifle the cough that worked its way up as he choked on his own saliva at this move.
"We're not going for a clean shave, are we?", you asked casually, trying to catch Arthur's eyes. He shrugged: "Whatever's easier for you."
You shook your head and began to trim his beard back to what you remembered he had the last time he visited you. Soon after you started, you noticed Arthur's cheeks getting warm and red. You were well aware that your cleavage was on his eye-level, probably the reason why he decided he was better off inspecting the floor. Meanwhile, you enjoyed gently tilting his head the way you needed it, finding no resistance from the man himself.
You talked only little, answering insignificant questions Arthur posed when the blade wasn't near his face, and he could actually move his mouth. You were almost done, only lining up his beard to give it an overall cleaner look, when Arthur said something out of the blue.
"Y'know, I been thinkin' about you. A lot," Arthur croaked, his throat dry all of a sudden.
"Mhm", you answered, not sure which direction that was supposed to go. You stopped shaving off the stubble on his neck when his Adam’s apple bobbed.
"Uh, I mean...", Arthur clears his throat, forcing you to stop the shave and look at him. Finally, his eyes found yours, "We're...uhm...friends, I hope." He forced a little chuckle that didn't sound genuine, especially under your curious gaze. You gave a quiet hum as sign of agreement.
"'s just that I...look, I understand if ya've found someone else. Hell, I took my sweet time and it wasn't fair how I treated you when you...", Arthur cleared his throat again, the words coming difficult to him, "when ya told me about yer feelings."
This was the point when your heartrate picked up and you felt your hands become sweatier. You had to put the blade down for a moment to wipe your hand on your shirt. Your mind was still caught on the line 'I understand if ya've found someone else'...like that had even been an option for you. For months you had tried to get over this man, then he came back waltzing into your life and you put your own ugly bounty poster on the wall as a reminder. And the you fixed the bedframe that he had fixed rather unsatisfyingly. You hadn't told him it broke the very same night he had “repaired” it. Nothing had changes the last year, you were pining as much for this man as ever...and yet, you didn't quite know how to react.
"I really like ya", he finally said, " I know well I don’t deserve it, but if ya wanted to give me another chance…"
"Morgan", you exhaled, "I got my boot between your balls and a blade at your throat...if you want to pull my leg I suggest you-"
"I mean it", and Arthur's gaze was so intense, this time it was you who struggled to watch him in the eye. You knew he wasn't lying. Hell, you hadn't really expected that he was just pulling your leg, you just said it to say something…to lighten up the mood that appeared so heavy again.
"Okay", you mumbled, barely able to disguise the tremor in your voice. Then you took the blade again, carefully turning Arthur's head upwards so you could better reach the hair you still needed to shave. There was this long and uncomfortable silence that neither of you wanted to break. You heard the birds outside, the blade scratching the skin and a heartbeat...if it was yours or Arthur's, you weren't quite sure.
Arthur thought that Guarma had been hell, but he found that your silence and okay was even more tortuous.
Finally, you were done. With a hairdressing brush you got rid of all the loose hair that decorated Arthur’s face. He gave you a slightly annoyed look as you tickled him behind his ears. Then you took the little towel that had prevented hair from falling into his shirt out in the garden to shake it out.  
The moment you stepped into the cabin again, Arthur's eyes caught yours and they were demanding an answer.
"I've never stopped loving you", the words burned as they left your mouth. The towel was thrown over an empty chair. Saying the words out loud…it changed something. Because as long as you had only thought them, there was this slim chance that they weren’t true. But there was no backing-out now, no denying.  
You continued: "But I can't...I won't rejoin the gang. I want to live here."
You said that because you knew that Arthur wouldn’t leave the gang for you, but you wouldn’t rejoin in either.
"Y/n...this thing is pretty much over", Arthur sighed. He was referring to the gang. He had alluded to it when he had recounted the happenings of the past weeks, especially breaking John out of jail and earning Dutch's disapproval. This was the first time he directly admitted it, "I want the Marstons safe...and the women...then it's done."
"Oh, so 'one more big score and then you can leave everything behind", you mimicked Dutch's voice. A tinge of animosity accompanied your words and this certainly wasn’t lost on Arthur. You couldn’t help but feel a bit unfairly placed in this situation.
"C'mere for a second", Arthur beckoned you, his eyes following every one of your movements until you stood in front of him, your hips brushing against the table. Arthur remained seated in his chair. Glancing at the man quickly, you congratulated yourself on having done a good job; his haircut looked sharp.
Then, suddenly, Arthur took your hand. It was such an unusual gesture, it alarmed you immediately. His hands were warm and rough, but not in an unpleasant way. Arthur held your hand lightly, as if he was afraid of hurting you.
"I promise this is the last time. In a week, we're going to hit a train with army pay. Wednesday evening. After that, I'm done", Arthur spoke earnestly.
"I can't-" believe you, you wanted to say, because you knew it had been the same story with Mary. You knew that once an outlaw means always and outlaw. Not even Arthur's word was enough to ensure that those bonds wouldn't bind him to his old life and to the gang.
"Don’t say nothing yet", Arthur interrupted calmly. He stood up and let your hand slide off his, as he walked to his satchel. He pulled out his journal and carefully put it next to you. With no hesitation, he opened and skimmed through it. You couldn't see most of the pages because he flipped through them so quickly.
"It ain't even half-way done", Arthur assessed, showing you the empty pages, "I'll leave that here 'n collect it in a week."
"What?", you questioned, frowning, "What if I decide to read it as a bedtime story?"
"'s nothing in there that yer not allowed to know", Arthur mumbled, "Contrary. Sometimes I think I'm much better expressing my feelings on paper. I've never been a good talker."
Silently, Arthur opened a page in his journal that had a little dog-ear. The left side was empty and only had smudges of pencil on it, on the right side there was this impressively detailed bounty poster. It had the layout of the bounty posters they have hanging all over town, obviously it wasn't printed, but hand drawn. You recognized your name, your 15-dollars-worth and then yourself, staring back at you. You hadn't imagined Arthur to be one to draw people, let alone portrait style. In the brush of his pencil you recognized that he might be more professed in sketching trees and animals, but it was a perfectly decent drawing of you. Hell, it was even flattering, compared to the atrocity they had on your real poster.
Arthur put the journal away, leaving it on top of a pile of books on your nightstand.
"I jus' need t'know if this is a place I'm allowed to return to", Arthur finally asked.
"Always", you replied without hesitation, your gaze still fixed on his journal. Is he trying in tempting you to read it? Because if that's the case, it was definitely working.
"So I won't be greeted with a gun in my face?", Arthur chuckled.
You sighed, taking a brush that stood abandoned in the corner of the room and started to swipe Arthur's hair out of the house. "If you're going to bring that up one more time, I swear I'll give you a reason to fear me", you quipped.
"Oh, I already fear you a great deal", Arthur said sarcastically.
You shot him an intense gaze.
"You staying for dinner?", you asked in between the sound of bristles scratching on wood.
Arthur shrugged, mumbling: "They won't miss me for another day..."
"Good. Then go hunt something", you asserted, gently shoving him outside by brushing against his boots until he took the hint.
"Yes ma'am...", Arthur mumbled, a hint of amusement in his voice. When you had successfully shoved him outside, you closed the door behind him, not without a bit of force. It left him slightly perplexed and wondering.
You had tried your best to hold your feelings together, but it had become a little much. Since Arthur's confession, your hands hadn't stopped shaking and you hastily put the brush aside, sitting down with your back against the door. There were so many feelings inside you that all needed to be addressed, but you struggled to even detangle them.
First and foremost: You had spent months pining for Arthur, only to be rejected in a cruel way and then again wasting months in trying to get over him. Just when you thought you were getting somewhere, he comes back into your life with a request that suggests anything but care for you. So, he leaves, and appears again. Then leaves again, presumed dead or out of country and now he's here again, asking for another chance as if you even had the power to reject him. You didn't know if Arthur would be able to make you happy. In a way, you feared it might be the opposite because there was still one score...one more score. He might die, or he might stay for another score, and another, and so on.
You stifled a sob. Scenarios played out in your mind, and they all converged into two possible outcomes, ending with Arthur dead or disappeared, disappointing you yet and yet again because one can't just stop being an outlaw. The 5000 on his head won't just disappear, presumed or actually dead - it didn't matter much.
"Son of a bitch", you hissed, mad at the situation.
You just wanted to be happy and find some closure for this surge of emotions that had held you hostage for months, if not years.  
"Y/n?", Arthur's voice was so soft when he called out your name, you almost jumped in shock because you thought he had long gone hunting. But his voice came from right in front of the door.
"You okay?", he asked quietly.
"Yeah", you croaked, and it sounded anything but convincing.
"Ya sure?", he wanted you to confirm.
"I just need some time to think...", you whispered, trying hard not to sob.
"I'll stay close", you heard him state, then there were his steps leading away from the house.
For a while, you just sat on the floor. How to proceed?
By the time Arthur returned, the door to your cabin was wide open again, the sun shining inside. You had made your decision.
"I got us a rabbit", Arthur announced, "already skinned it. Figured it ain’t your kinda work."
You responded with an appreciative nod.
"It’s a real beauty”, Arthur grinned, a wisp of humour in his eyes, “or was, anyhow.  I shot it with a small arrow so I reckon the meat-“ before Arthur could put the rabbit down on the table, you had sneaked in for a hug.
"Oh", Arthur stuttered, carefully placing the rabbit down. He lifted his bloody and dirty hands in the air to make sure not to get any dirt on you. Even though you wore clothes that had seen better days and apparently had been demoted to housework, he still didn’t want to get you dirty. Despite his desire to reciprocate the hug.
"Y/n…", he chuckled apologetically, "I need to get washed up."
At that moment, you suddenly looked up to him, your faces mere inches apart. He noticed your gaze drifting between his eyes and lips, then you leaned in, placing a gentle peck on his cheek.
The blush was immediate. Your hands instinctively found their way to his face and tenderly cupped his cheeks. They were just as warm as they had been when you cut his beard.
"I'm really glad you're here", you said, a smile playing on your lips.
"Yeah, I'm-" Arthur began, but you interrupted him with a proper kiss. It was a brief one, testing the waters if Arthur would be fine with that. As you pulled back slightly to assess his reaction, he didn’t hesitate a second, closing the distance between you once more. "I really …don't wanna get ya…dirty", Arthur mumbled between kisses. He could feel the corner of your lips curving into a smile each time you interrupted him. The man struggled to keep his dirty hands in the air.
The kisses quickly became more passionate, and when your hands left his cheeks, one to rest in the hollow between his shoulder and neck, while the other one boldly explored his chest region. It occasionally shifted to grab his arm and squeezing lightly.
Arthur mumbled your name warningly, twice. Then he couldn't help but put his hand in the small of your back, pushing you closer. His bloody hands would surely leave a mark on your clothes, but neither of you cared about that, as his hands became just as active as yours, sometimes cupping your cheek, at other times allowing himself to explore your body a little.
Arthur had just enough control to not place you on the rabbit, when he lifted you up on the table. When both of you became short of breath, Arthur rested his forehead against yours. Your legs had snaked around his, caging him in.
"Haven't done that in a long time", Arthur's voice was raspy as he tried to apologize for the somewhat sloppy make-out session.
"Me neither", you giggled and placed a final kiss on his cheek, "brushed your hair for nothing", you noted, looking up to Arthur's tousled hair. Your fault.
Arthur backed away a little, as much as your legs allowed him: "Christ." He had left signific signs of blood and dirt all over you.
"Mhh…", you hummed amusedly, "Ain't my fault you can't keep your hands to yourself."
"T'way I see it, darling…", Arthur smiled and tried to brush some dirt off your cheek with his thumb, "it's precisely your fault."
Arthur had headed to a keg outside to get cleaned. You decided to get cleaned up only after butchering the rabbit, as this would get your hands dirty again anyways. As the meat sizzled in the in the pan, you decided it was time to wash up as well. While you put the finishing touches on the dish, Arthur sat at the table, leisurely smoking a cigarette and observing you. He had asked if he could help you with anything, but you had declined, insisting that he had already done his part by hunting the rabbit. It was your turn prepare it.
When you plated the meal, it was really nothing too complicated, and yet, Arthur thought, for a free meal, it was perfect. You initiated a conversation; it was more light-hearted than the one you had when you cut his hair. The weightier themes seemed to have lifted from Arthur’s heart, and both of you sought distractions.
You told Arthur more about how you passed your days, gardening, drawing, riding into town. Really most of the money you earned the honest way, cutting hair and doing the odd delivery job for the grocery store.
It was frightening how easy it was to talk to Arthur. Two or three years ago, you would have never imagined, talking so freely to him. Though he'd always been kind, there was an air of unapproachability that had since crumbled completely after the heartfelt conversation you both shared.
The conversation where Arthur poured out his frustrations and regrets concerning Hosea's and Lenny's death, had brought a sense of liberation. It dawned on him how long it had been since he spoke so openly with anyone. Arthur leaned back into his chair. In front of him was his empty plate, opposite of the table, you sat within arm’s reach, chatting about an interesting traveller that came past your cabin a few months back. Arthur listened attentively, his eyes following the movements of your fingers skilfully rolling a cigarette.
Neither of you ran out of stories to tell the other. Arthur talked about people he had met on his travels, a clumsy photographer, a man obsessed with fast horses and racing.
You only realised how long you had been talking when the light in the cabin became sparse, the sun sinking closer to the horizon.
As the visibility waned, limited to the faint glow emitted by the burning tip of the cigarette, you finally rose to your feet to illuminate the cabin with the warm light of lanterns.
"I'll get my bedroll", Arthur announced, standing up with a grunt. He hadn't allowed himself to be this idle in a long time. All he had done today was sitting still for a haircut, killing one rabbit and then indulging in a lavish meal while engaging in easy conversation. His body had finally caught up with the stress of the last few weeks and he didn't know how to feel about how much his body ached. Despite the sun barely disappearing, Arthur would have been ready for bed. Funny, he thought, admitting one’s feeling for a girl could drain his strength that much.
At his announcement, Arthur noticed that you halted and were about to open your mouth as if to suggest something. But you didn't and let him venture outside.
When he took longer than anticipated, you followed him outside, only to find him leaning against the fence, his eyes in the sky. The sky was in this beautiful transition phase, going from hues of purple to a serene shade of blue with the first stars emerging in the east. You observed Arthur’s profile for a while, he didn't protest or showed any signs of being disturbed by your presence.
He was handsome. Something about his stature made you want to lean into him. But you didn't. Instead, you stood there, finding it hard to peel your eyes off him. Your lips quivered under the urge to say what you had thought earlier. After a big breath, you tried to say as casually as you managed: "I know my bed is too small for two people...but I was thinking if I put the mattress on the floor we could-"
"Y/N", Arthur interrupted you gently. He turned to look at you. Caringly, his hand found your shoulder, "It ain't right just yet."
Lying next to each other, cuddling, hugging, maybe stealing another kiss, you craved it badly. You finally had what you had desired for so long, you wanted it all at once. But Arthur knew that it would be unwise. He thought a lot about you, hell he did. And in his mind, he'd be too embarrassed to admit it of course, you had done way more than just kissed. But he knew it'd be wrong. He didn't want to fully commit just yet, and he didn't want to get your hopes up. It was genuine, when he said that the train robbery was the last score he wanted to do with the gang, but one train robbery is enough to get killed and he wouldn't dream about giving you this kind of pain. If he held it vague, if there was no sleeping close to each other, there was also no missing this proximity...if. Always if.
"Fine", you sucked in a little air, "but you take the bed then."
The two of you headed inside, Arthur with his bedroll clamped under his arm.
He shook his head: "It's your house, I can't jus'-"
"Exactly. It's my house, I can sleep in the bed every damn day. Besides, I don't figure you had a proper bed on Guarma, did you?", you teased.
"No, but-"
"Neither do you have one in camp so please- accept it", you looked up at Arthur rather desperately.
"Fine. You don't come complainin' to me if yer back hurts tomorrow", Arthur quipped.
"Oh, I'll definitely complain", you grinned. Arthur gave you his bedroll to spread in the corner where he had slept the last time. Arthur had sat down on the bed and watched you quietly as you readied your sleeping corner. When you glanced back at him, it was evident how weary he was, his eyes barely open, sitting up only out of politeness.
"You don't have to stay awake for me", you smiled, leaning against the table and studying the exhausted man. You noticed how tired he had become during your conversation. He had at least supressed three yawns.
"I jus'...haven't seen ya for so long, I don't want to waste that time with sleeping", Arthur explained. You found it cute he thought that way.
"You're not wasting anything", 'because we'll see each other again in a week, right?' you added in your mind. "I have this book I want to finish anyways, you just rest", you assured him.
You waited until he had settled in, exchanging a couple laughs about how unstable your bedframe was, and then you did the dishes. It didn't take you long, but Arthur was asleep when you had finished. He was turned towards the wall. On the nightstand was his journal. He had put it on top of the book you were currently reading. You took the book and settled on the bedroll.
You woke up to the sound of the bed creaking and blinked at Arthur, the first rays of the sun casting a warm glow on his frame. At some point during the night, he must have woken up and shed his clothes, as he now rested in the room clad only in his unionsuit.
"'m sorry, darlin'. I didn't want to wake ya", he apologized his raspy morning voice.
"It's okay", you yawned, forcing yourself to throw off your blanket to stand up, "I'll make some coffee."
In a couple big steps, Arthur was at your side: "You sleep some more, it's my turn for breakfast." Arthur squatted next to you and tugged you in before you could protest. You forced your tired eyes to stay on his face and not venture further down, pondering what the thin material might reveal.
When Arthur shot you a content smile, seeing you were up for no protest, a wave of panic washed over you.
"You won't just leave, right?", all of a sudden, you were wide awake.
"I won't", Arthur assured you.
"'cause if you do-", you started, a yawn interrupting your threat. Arthur chuckled at how cute and innocent you looked, happy that your yawn cut off before you could destroy that innocence with another gory threat.
"I'm way too scared of what you'd do", and then, to your surprise, he kissed your forehead. You only relaxed when Arthur had stood up again and indeed started to set up coffee. You were soon off to sleep again, only woken when the sizzling of fat in the pan woke you.
Arthur had made eggs. You ate in silence. A couple of times, Arthur tried to start a conversation, but you weren’t in the mood. He’d be gone in a couple of hours and you’d be left wondering if he’d ever return. Arthur knew that this was what was plaguing you, but he didn’t find the right angle to approach you.
You both did the dishes together, you helped Arthur by saddling his horse and then he had mounted it, looking down at you.
“Ya ain’t so happy about the prospect of me returning in a week, ‘s that it?”, Arthur joked.
“No”, you answered dryly, “I ain’t so happy about you leaving for a week.”
Arthur sighed and steered his horse closer to the fence: “Climb up here, I gotta tell ya something.”
Rather unwillingly, you climbed on one of the horizontal planks that kept your fence together. Arthur offered his hand for support and as an excuse to pull you a little closer. He kissed you, gently, on your lips.
“I promised I’ll be back, didn’t I?”, Arthur mumbled. He wasn’t convinced, and neither were you when you whispered a dire “Yeah..”
You didn’t like the good-bye kiss. In fact, you wished he hadn’t done that. It hurt even more, seeing him disappear between the trees in the distance. For a while, you stood there helplessly, wondering what to do next. Minutes passed before you ventured into your cabin, distracting yourself with some cleaning before your eyes fell on Arthur’s journal. You noticed a piece of paper sticking out. Without thinking, you opened the journal and the loose paper floated to the ground. You didn’t even bother picking it up, your eyes caught the first word written on top of the page. It was your name, written in Arthur’s familiar handwriting.
“Hell no”, you kicked the paper under the bed before you could read any further. You weren’t up for some heartfelt “Good-bye, in case I die I want you to know this”-letter. Frustration and anger bubbled within you as you scrambled into your good jeans and crammed your revolver into its back pocket. With a swift motion, you picked up your hunting rifle, mounted your horse and started to follow Arthur’s track.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x--x-x-x-x-x-x-x
next chapter: here
Shoutout to @little-honeypie who basically wrote the confession scene. I wouldn't have ever finished this if it weren't for them <3
taglist: @photo1030
taglist for this series: @pinkiemme @loveheartarthur @twola @shiokitsune @missredemption @kakashiislut @thewalkingdead1463 @yyiikes @renwai @walk-in-sunshine @rdrlady @ivybeeloved @trinswhimsys @reddedmiller @chiefqueefsosa @sauvignon-velvet @mrsarthurmorgan @readingcoco @pookiesnatcher @gloomdoomraccoon
344 notes · View notes
creedslove · 5 months
Text
WHO KNEW? 💍💔 - PART TWO
Tumblr media
No outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader
"You took my hand, you showed me how
You promised me you'd be around (...)
I took your words and I believed in everything you said to me (...)
If someone said three years from now, you'd be long gone, I'd stand up and punch them out, 'cause they're all wrong
I know better, 'cause you said forever, and ever, who knew?"
Summary: even against your wishes, your bond with the Millers straightens and a series of events causes you and Joel to get closer, enough to spike the fear of falling again for him
• This is the second part of Who Knew? 💍💔 Which was also inspired by this amazing HEADCANON request
Warnings: angst, broken hearts, mentions of divorce, mentions of infidelity, fluff, age gap (Joel is four to five years older than reader and the time skip is 12 to 14 years (Sarah's age) but feel free to imagine whatever you want), house breaking, protective Joel, sexual tension
A/N: so besties, I've been obsessed with this idea, and I hope you enjoy it as well! I mean, I've been writing a little more than 1k words a day, there were some parts I thought were good and some were not so good, as a final result, I don't know, I really hope you all enjoy it my lovelies! It's so hard to resist Joel, isn't it?
10.4k words
Tumblr media
If someone told you one day, after a decade of being divorced from Joel due to the huge heartbreak he put you through, your bond with the Millers would straighten once more, you would stand up and punch them out. It was so ridiculously absurd to think you would become closer to the man who chewed you up and spat you out and even if he had indeed changed and was a better person, wasn't enough to make you forget what happened. Yes, you had forgiven him, but not forgotten what went on between the two of you, and even if a part of you desperately begged you to stay away and never talk to Joel again, destiny was pretty ironic at its doings and made you and his daughter, Sarah, become friends. You didn't mean to, and you were sure that if it were up to him, he wouldn't have said yes either, but you never knew she was his daughter and he never knew his daughter's friend was… well, you.
After he did some working at your home, he had asked you out, which you actually considered, but then dismissed the idea completely, there was no way you would put yourself through that again, even if he was even more handsome than when he was young, even if he did make your heart race and pound like you were some inexperienced teenager and even if late at night before falling asleep you closed your eyes and replayed in your mind the last kiss you cherished. Even if you focused hard enough and could still feel his warmth, the heavy grip of his hand on your waist, the way his beard that now was sprinkled with grays here and there scratched your skin and how Joel Miller still had the best kiss you'd ever tried. For a moment it had felt so right, even if it was wrong, and a hidden part of you, the part that just maybe didn't despise Joel that much often allowed you to wonder what would actually happen if you had given him a chance to take you out, would it have been really that bad? You would've gone somewhere to drink or grab something to eat, hang out, perhaps even dance and of course you would end up in Joel's bed, hardly any woman would pass up this opportunity. For a moment you wish it could've been that way, but unfortunately, you and Joel were done. After you turned him down you still shared a last kiss and then you both went back to your own lives, the only thing that connected the two of you in the past was the failed marriage you had just as the only thing that connected the two of you in the present was Sarah.
She was the loveliest girl you'd ever met in your life, so smart and sweet, always kind to everyone, responsible and even if you had had problems with her dad, you couldn't help but feel sorry for her and the fact her own mother didn't want to be around; it sounded crazy to you that woman could give up her chance of being the mother of a wonderful little girl like Sarah, even if Joel had killed any kind of desire of getting involved with someone to the point of building up a family. Not to mention Joel himself, he was a handsome, hard-working man, and he had been a good husband before Angela ruined your life. You knew she wasn't the only one to blame, Joel was a real dick, but now you certainly had two reasons to hate her: the fact she ruined your marriage and that she abandoned her daughter.
After Joel took over the renovations in your home, Sarah continued coming over and even if you felt sort of guilty from keeping the truth from her, you also knew it wasn't your place to tell her, if anything, you and Joel needed to do it together. You couldn't ruin the perfect image she had of her dad, because he was a great father to her and no one could deny that. Overall, you really enjoyed her presence; it wasn't uncommon for her to tag along during lunch time or spend the afternoon reading on your couch. Sometimes you wondered if she didn't have enough friends to hang out with, after all, Joel was busy throughout the day and any teen would take the opportunity of freedom to do whatever shit they wanted with them without having to give their parents the time of the day, but that didn't make any sense, not with Sarah being a sociable girl like she was, so when the realization that she sort of envisioned you as a motherly figure at some level, you felt quite shocked. If life hadn't pulled some unfunny tricks along your way, she could've easily been yours and Joel's daughter. You tried to shake it off and pretend she didn't see you that way, but looking back at your interactions it was undeniable; Sarah opened up to you about things she certainly didn't with Joel, from the pain of periods, to problems with girl friends and boys. It was amusing until Sarah began questioning you about it, asking you about your love life, past relationships and why you were single. You felt bad about not telling her the whole truth, but it was a complicated situation. Especially when she came up with the idea she really considered it to be genius
"Why don't you date my dad?!"
She asked you one lazy afternoon, making you choke softly at the water you were drinking, looking at her shocked and speechless for a while, her sweet smile was impossible to make you get mad at her, and above all it was a genuine question, she wasn't just messing with you.
"What?! My dad looks good, he works hard and he would make you very happy!" She cheered innocently, which caused your heart to sink.
"No… I wouldn't date your dad, he's incompatible… I mean, we are incompatible, I'm sure we wouldn't get along"
"Why?! Is it because you have more money than us? Dad does say you are way out of his league"
And you were shocked and speechless once more. Joel had talked about you to Sarah? And he had told her you were out of his league? This information should have made you scoff and roll your eyes, and not make your cheeks heat up while you blushed.
"No Sarah, Jesus no! It's got nothing to do with money or anything… I mean, your dad works hard and he should earn more than he does, because he is very dedicated and well, an honest working man like Joel can be worth a lot more than a rich guy, trust me" you sighed as she stared at you intently "but the thing is… I've been married once, I was too young, it was disastrous, it didn't work obviously, I got hurt and well… your dad sort of reminds me of him, my ex-husband I mean… It's hard to explain, but no, I wouldn't date your father"
You hated that you lied to her, well, half lies at least, but you wished you could be honest, Sarah was an important part of your life and it would be a lot easier if you three would come clean about everything that happened; on the other hand, you couldn't even imagine the mess you would make in her poor little head, as it was pretty messy and fucked up for you as well whenever you stopped to think you were friends with your ex-husband's daughter, the one he had with the woman he cheated on you with and that simply walked out and abandoned him. It even sounded made up, so you offered her just the piece of information you could. Sarah reached out to you, taking your hand in hers and caressing your knuckles, she gave you a sympathetic look and nodded
"I'm so sorry… I can't even imagine how you must feel, he didn't deserve you anyway, you can be sure you are way better than him, and well, I am just glad dad isn't like that, he's a nice guy, he would never do such a thing to anyone. I just feel like he deserved more too, you know? That woman… my mom, even if she shouldn't be called that, just broke his heart and disappeared. Uncle Tommy told me she never really wanted to have me in the first place and if it weren't for dad, you know…" She looked down trying to hide the thick sadness that fogged her face and it was your turn to reach to her, taking her hand, but seeing it wasn't enough as you got up and walked to Sarah, giving her a hug.
"I don't know, I just wish dad would find a nice girl like yourself and then he could be happy, I mean, we all could…"
•••
Joel groaned at how annoying his brother really was, he didn't get why Tommy would always pry into his fucking business instead of handling his own life, Joel was a grown man and he didn't need anyone trying to set him up with women or just inviting him out out of pity. He could take care of himself; he didn't need to meet women or be in a relationship, he was fine the way he was, his life was already way too hectic the way it was, whenever he felt lonely he could just pick up some woman at a bar and get laid and then go back to his everyday routine. And yet both Tommy and Sarah kept on getting on his nerves, always suggesting him to one girl or another or trying to drag him on double dates. When Sarah had casually told him to ask you out, completely oblivious to the fact he had already done it and you shut him out, Joel was at a loss of words, he tried playing cool but he couldn't deny the mess his feelings had become. He wasn't sure how to suppress them, not after that one kiss. That must've meant something, you wouldn't just give him a speech of how uninterested you were and how you two would never work out again and then kiss him like that, you probably still had feelings for him, if not feelings, at least desire, and as much as he would love to act on it, he didn't want to force things up, to he pushy and make you uncomfortable. He'd hurt you too many times to learn that if you'd asked him to stay away, he should stay away. Not only that, Tommy was completely onboard with everything you had said, to him, the fact Joel was crushing on his ex-wife more than a decade after breaking her heart was a clear sign of madness. He figured Joel still had feelings for you, even if Tommy wasn't one to settle down, he couldn't understand how his brother went from madly in love with his pretty young wife to a terrible husband and finally the asshole who dumped her for another woman. He knew that the passion Joel felt for Angela was strong, but even more than just a burning passion, lay that undying love he'd felt for you, and he was sure it wouldn't simply go away, which didn't necessarily mean that Joel surrendering to that love was a smart move. Quite the opposite, it was probably the dumbest thing Tommy had ever heard in his entire life. How could Joel even keep any hopes of getting with you again?! It hadn't worked, too many people got hurt and all he wanted was that his brother could actually see that, so he simply discouraged Joel from getting anywhere near you, as if it wasn't bad enough Sarah had been dragged accidentally into this story, he didn't want his brother suffering around. So he set his brother up on a date, something that Joel hated with passion but since he was feeling particularly hopeless that night he ended up accepting it.
He was usually very against being set up on blind dates, but Joel had created a depressing ritual of always going out and grabbing a drink whenever he came across the date that would've marked his wedding anniversary with you. Joel often heard men were forgetful and didn't remember important dates, but he had never been like that, always keeping the important dates fresh in his mind was something common, ever since he was a child, especially when they brought him strong emotions, such as the ones he shared with you. He thought it was a little stupid at first, but he found out that it helped him cope with the guilt and the doubts that always clouded up his mind. He would sit at a bar and wonder where you could be, how your life would have been like and if you ever thought of him. It sort of became his thing, but this year, for the first time, he knew the exact answers to his questions, and it was so odd, he decided to take Tommy's suggestions to go out with a friend of his brother's girlfriend, he didn't really care nor paid attention, he just exchanged numbers with her, showered and got dressed after work and headed for the restaurant.
And just as he had predicted, it had been another disastrous date. Not that the girl wasn't pretty, she was, but she was just exhausting; her conversation was tiring, her subjects were boring and overall, she just wasn't you. Joel didn't understand why he was having it so bad for you, he knew he shouldn't, he should forget about it all and focus on something else, but as much as he tried not to think of you, more he thought of you. It was maddening. He couldn't help himself but compare the two of you: you were prettier, smarter, funnier, you dressed and smelled better than that random stranger he saw himself being forced to have dinner with. And he wished with all his heart you could be on that date with him; if only you gave him just one chance to show you he was a better man, he would never hurt you like he did before, give you a chance to redeem himself and make you happy exactly the way you deserved it, he would be the happiest man in the world. Life wasn't gonna make things easier for him, and deep down, he knew he didn't even deserve it in the first place, so he tried once more paying attention to his date, which didn't last very long and the moment he saw the opportunity to leave, he grabbed it like a life preserver in the middle of the ocean and headed to a bar - alone, and only after paying for the check, after all, Joel Miller was still a gentleman.
Your wedding anniversary had always been a tricky date for you; there were years you went completely unaffected by it and years you felt like dying. For the first time, however, you were closer to Joel than you'd always been in the years before, and because of that, you decided you deserved better than just stay home and have some bland dinner by yourself, you would go out and perhaps meet other people… And your plan went really smoothly for a while; you got to a nice bar, dressed nicely, dragging some male attention towards you and even got paid a drink by a handsome stranger who waved from afar. It felt like a promising night, until Joel Miller walked in and looked for a table, and he looked devilish handsome as he did so. You bit your lips feeling the alcohol rushing towards one direction at the same time you censored yourself: no matter how lonely and needy you were feeling nor how handsome he was, you couldn't simply feel the hots for him. As if he'd just read your mind, Joel turned around, his eyes falling right on you, his gaze softened up and you saw him running his tongue through his lips, deciding whether or not to walk towards you.
Of course he did it.
The moment he approached, Joel noticed the sadness in your eyes and he was sure you were the for the exact same reason he was, and it was just another motive to get closer to you; taking the chair next to you, he asked the bartender for a drink and as soon as he had it in hands, he stared at you.
"Happy wedding anniversary, darling" he tilted his glass against yours, as you just nodded and took a long sip.
"Happy wedding anniversary, handsome" you replied in a mockery tone using the old nickname you used for him. Handsome was a word that really described him, your Joel. He had always been a handsome man, but how well time treated him was impressive to say the least. He looked so good, he was bigger, broad and stronger. His dark hair had become a little grayer, just like a few patches all over his beard, and that suited him like a damn velvet glove. The way his shirt hung tight around his shoulders and down his arms, eyes lingering on him for way too long, as a warmth spread through your cheek and Joel chuckled
"Funny how you still blush when I'm around… Exactly like old times" he grinned and took another sip of his drink, which was enough to break you free from the spell you were under.
"What are you doing here? I thought I'd made myself pretty clear, Joel" you sighed and stared down into your glass.
"I'm doing the same as you are, darling… I'm thinking about all the bad decisions I made in life. You have been pretty clear, I ain't going to bother you, but I just missed you… it's so weird to see Sarah getting home everyday so excited over you, talking about how nice and awesome you are and I have to pretend not to know about it"
"Yeah? And you think it's easy for me to spend the whole afternoon listening to her talking about what an amazing dad you are? How you are awesome but very unlucky to have had your heartbroken by her mom?" You raised your eyebrow and chuckled
"She really say that?" Joel's expression showed a slight shock "she said I was an amazing dad?!"
You tilted your head at his surprise and bit your lips, perhaps it was just the drinks you had that softened you up a little, but when you saw it, you placed your hand on his arm and shook your head
"Yeah? Why are you so surprised? You are an amazing dad, Joel… that girl loves you more than anything in the world, she idolizes you, of course, she thinks you work too much and that you could both spend some more time together, but other than that, it's clear you are a great father. I was very surprised when we met again, to see your change, I never really thought you would become a better person, not after what happened, but it's nice to see Sarah changed that" you smiled softly at him, and that just melted Joel's rough heart, he immediately took your hand before you could move it away and caressed your knuckles softly, his gaze still making you pathetically shy, as he pursed his lips and you remembered how good they've always felt on your own and also all over your body.
"You know she also sees you as a mother figure, right?!"
"Yeah, I was reluctant to admit it at first, but she does… I guess she needed that, you know? A woman she could talk to about girl stuff, things she cannot talk to her dad or her uncle Tommy" you smiled "I really like Sarah and I'm very glad you allow us to be friends, I understand it is a really odd situation for you, as it is for me, but I like her a lot… you know, if things had been different, she could've been my daughter… our daughter" you sighed "things could've been different Joel… you know what made so hard for me to forgive you? It's not exactly you falling for Angela, of course, rejection hurts a lot, but sometimes it happens, sometimes you fall for someone you shouldn't have, but what still breaks my heart is that you lied to me, you played with me instead of coming clean. You just kept me around even if you didn't want me anymore, so just you would have a comfortable option in case it didn't work with her, and that was what made me feel worse… it made me feel unworthy, because you could still have been considerate of me and just break things up before it all happened" you shrugged
"Darling, I-" he squeezed your hand tighter but you pulled it away
"I'm not trying to make you upset or anything, all I am saying is that things could have been different between us, they should have been at least, if not staying married, having a child and building a family together, then at least having your honesty…"
"What can I do so you forgive me?" Joel asked, his voice breaking a little as he tried to hide the emotion growing at any minute.
"I've already forgiven you Joel, I already told you that… but I can't forget what happened, it will always haunt me" you sighed "too many things happened and as much as I had loved you, I think I would never be able to trust you"
"Please, I have changed, it kills me to know I've hurt you so much, I wish I could go back in time and undo everything that I did.. please, darling" Joel begged you with those brown soft eyes, his hand cupping your cheek in a warm caress and even if you closed your eyes and leaned into his touch for a while, you knew you couldn't let yourself fall into his touch, because if you did, there would be no turning back.
"If Angela returned today, Joel… imagine if she came back and tried claiming you and Sarah, would you still care about me? Because I don't see this happening, Joel. Honestly, what I think is that you want me because you feel bad about what happened and because you couldn't have who you really wanted…"
His expression was indecipherable and for a second you thought he would say something, but all he did was pull you closer, gluing your lips together in an urgent kiss, you could've fought it, but you didn't; instead, you kissed him back, taking your hands into his curls and tugging at them more and more each time Joel pulled you even closer.
Only when the two of you broke the kiss, he looked into your eyes, his thumb stroking your bottom lip gently
"There isn't anyone I want but you, I never stopped loving you, darling… even when Angela was around, she couldn't compare to you" his words shattered your heart, as much as you wanted to believe that, you still couldn't. You grabbed his hand and sighed
"Don't do this again, Joel, please. You've ruined too many things for me already…" you got up and said goodbye "we can't, you know it"
"What have I ruined for you, darling? Tell me and I'll fix it, please"
You chuckled sad and shrugged
"Joel, you even ruined Queen for me'
You walked away from him, leaving him there with his drink and his thoughts, a puzzled look out of confusion in his face trying to figure out exactly what the hell you meant by that. Just as he saw you disappear out of the door, he realized what meant as he paid attention to the lyrics of the song playing in background:
"Love of my life, you hurt me
You've broken my heart
And now you leave me
Love of my life, can't you see (...)"
And even if Joel wanted to be rational and convince himself he'd lost you for good, his heart still insisted on wanting what he couldn't have.
•••
Your car parked in Joel's driveway was the last thing he expected to see that night, after working excruciatingly and failing his promise of getting home earlier to have dinner with his daughter. He knew Sarah was probably waiting, disappointed but also used to it, full of having some sandwich or any other snack she could find. He cursed himself for getting so caught up at work, he didn't mean to, but he had done it again, after all, he had to attend an important meeting with a possible new client and then he would need to wait for the arrival of a bunch of materials that had been delayed for weeks, and even if he knew his daughter was safe with you, he still felt upset to have not given her the attention she needed. However, you had never been to his house before, that was something that you established from the very beginning and when he kissed you at the bar a couple of weeks ago, Joel was certain that was the end of seeing you, occasionally or not. He was sure you'd never shut Sarah out, you liked her for real, and she reciprocated the feelings; besides, you were a decent enough human being who knew you didn't have to mix things up. So, the fact you were indeed at his home, was concerning to him, who parked and immediately left, getting inside wanting to see what was going on. The moment the door opened in one hard swing, you got off the couch and walked to your ex-husband
“Hey Joel” you said, a little shy, suddenly, the fact you were standing in the middle of his home uninvited made you extremely embarrassed, as it felt you were somehow intruding on his intimacy. Since the divorce Joel had moved into a new house, bigger and cozier, a nice backyard with a decent swimming pool was something that drew your attention; you smiled at yourself, knowing how much Joel loved swimming, so it made your heart warm to see he had accomplished something that seemed quite small, but it meant a lot to you.
At first, when you saw the house, you couldn't help but be invaded by a furious jealousy of the possibility Joel had built that house for her, Angela, instead of you. Luckily, Sarah clarified he only started to build it when she was a toddler and that Tommy helped him, and that's why he often crashed there. You chuckled to yourself, that was typical of Tommy, but overall you felt proud of Joel and everything he achieved, you knew he had potential and it was great that he actually worked on it.
“Where's Sarah?!” He asked with worry and called her name once more, louder this time, frowning as you shushed him.
“I'm sorry I'm here, but she had a fever felt sick, I wanted to call you but she asked me not to an-” you were cut off by Joel simply climbing up the stairs and heading straight to Sarah's room, he felt a mix of guilt and worry weighing in his heart at the fact his baby daughter was sick and he couldn't be there for her. He barged into her room, normally, that would be enough to startle her, but instead, he found her peacefully asleep, clung tight to her pillow, dressed in her regular PJs. He touched her forehead wanting to check her temperature, but luckily her skin wasn't warm anymore. He looked at the door and found you there, arms folded and looking like you wanted to say something else, and then he just realized how rude he'd actually been to you by simply walking away and letting you talk to a brick wall. He placed a gentle kiss on his daughter's forehead and closed the door behind him.
“I'm sorry darling, I was worried and you should've called me…”
“It's okay, Joel… as I was saying, I wanted to call you, but Sarah asked me not to, she said you were having an important meeting and you would be home soon, anyway” you licked your lips as you realized he was extremely late and probably feeling so guilty about it all.
“You know, she was at my place and she was feeling a little down, at first I thought she was just upset because she wasn't invited to Melissa's party an-”
“That girl is a bitch” Joel said angrily and in such a defensive way that it was both cute he was so protective of his daughter at the same time it sounded hilarious to see him cursing another teenage girl. However, you had to agree with him, Melissa was indeed a bitch.
“Yeah, I know right?! Anyway, I noticed Sarah was burning up with fever and since she didn't want me to call you, I decided to bring her home and stay with her. So I asked her to take a cool shower, gave her some tylenol and made her some chicken soup with the things I found in your kitchen…” you both went downstairs and stopped in his living room. You tried not paying attention to how good your ex-husband looked after his long hour shift; his sweaty shirt so tight against his broad chest, his messy hair and that stressed attitude that would always melt away with a very intense orgasm.
“You made soup?!” Joel frowned a little shocked and interrupted your drifting thoughts.
“Y-yeah, why? Did I do bad?”
“No” Joel smiled softly and shook his head “not at all, it's just that… I haven't had your food in so long and you've always been a good cook, that's all” the nostalgia he felt was so big and it also warmed your heart, nodding at him “well, I made some more in case you wanted to have dinner too, it's in the kitchen, you can help yourself if you'd like…” you offered him and grabbed your purse “can you call me tomorrow and let me know if Sarah is better?”
Joel grabbed your arm gently and shook his head
“Don't go, not yet… just have dinner with me, talk to me for a while, I promise I won't try to kiss you or anything. Just keep me company, it's rare to have people over, it's usually Sarah and I and usually Tommy, but when they are out, it's just me” he looked at you with a sad expression, and you understood perfectly: loneliness.
Coming back home to an empty bed at night. Not having anyone to rely on, to hold, to give you support and affection, to make love. So you nodded and smiled at him, sitting down with him at the table and grabbed yourself a plate, giggling at how hungry he really was, eating as if he hadn't seen food in months. He raised his eyes at you and stopped chewing, blushing as you wouldn't stop staring.
“You know, you and Sarah have the same sad puppy eyes when you are sick?!” Joel raised his eyebrow at you and you laughed softly “same red teary eyes, sniffing as someone takes care of you, it's actually adorable”
“You think I'm adorable?!”
“Adorable isn't exactly what you are Joel…” you said letting your eyes wandering all over him and having your ex-husband to smirk at you
“Yeah? You think I'm attractive?”
“You know you are attractive, Joel, now shut up and eat” you frowned softly and had dinner with him; it was a pleasant moment, spending some time together, without any talks about the divorce or the past, just two old acquaintances who perhaps had some kind of feelings for each other and shared a meal together. There weren't accusations, apologies or tears, just mundane, regular conversations and laughter. It was nice to have that moment with Joel, as you both progressed in a conversation about your lives and how things had changed over the years, truly catching up instead of arguing. When the subjected revolved around Sarah again, your ex-husband couldn't contain his curiosity anymore:
“You never wanted kids, darling?”
You looked down at your empty plate, a glimmer of sadness crossing your eyes as you shook your head and stared at him
“Not after you, Joel… I used to want a kid, before, when we were together, but not anymore. I feel it's too late for me now, even if I'm still young, it just feels impossible, you know?”
Joel's hand rested on top of yours, he caressed it very gently and looked at you. He sighed knowing exactly what you meant, knowing you actually meant having a baby together and of course he blew it once more. He couldn't even describe the remorse he felt, even if you had spent the past half an hour having a rare moment of bliss tougher, he knew he would never be able to erase what had happened between the two of you. He wished he had a chance to do so, but deep inside, even if he did, he knew the damage had been done.
“It's alright, Joel…” you said shyly and got up as you picked the plates and piled them in the sink, he immediately walked to you,
“Let me handle the dishes, it's the least I can do, you know… after you took care of my daughter and cooked for us. I'm sure Sarah loved it, we aren't used to having homemade food” he chuckled as you nodded
“Yeah, I figured, that's why I decided to make something else…” you said as you walked to the oven and opened it, showing Joel the freshly baked batch of chocolate chips cookies. He widened his eyes like a child and smiled big.
“This is your favorite, I figured it was Sarah's as well” you said sweetly and got the tray out of the oven, although you mumbled something a couple of times, Joel hadn't replied to you, as he kept washing the plates without interruption. You didn't get why he ignored your question, it made no sense; just a few minutes ago you were both having a nice, sweet time together and suddenly he wasn't going to say anything? That was odd. You placed the cookies on the balcony and called him again, to which you got no reply so you just shook his arm a little calling him again.
He turned around and watched you
“What is it?” He asked with a sweet smile, making you even more confused
“I called you a couple of times and you didn't say anything… is everything alright with you?” And at that question his face fell and it was impossible for Joel to hide his sadness. He licked his lips and nodded
“Yeah… it's just that… I'm kinda deaf in my right ear” he blushed and looked down in shame “I had a work accident some years ago and something blew up when I stood too close to it and well…” he shrugged and you felt your heart sink. Your poor Joel, always such a hardworking man, despite everything between you both, you never wanted him to be that injured. It saddened you to see how ashamed he seemed of it, even if he had no reason to be ashamed of it at all, and suddenly it made all sense to you why he was always subtly tilting his head to the left or standing towards that direction when he talked to you.
“I can hear it just fine, got used to it by now, but if you mumble something on my right it's kinda hard to me” the simple and even innocent way he said that made you so sympathetic of him, but it was way more than just that. It made you want to hold him, to assure him it was fine and he was still nothing but perfect no matter what had happened.
“Oh Joel…” you whispered and held his head in both of your hands, gently, your fingers brushing against his thick beard as you got closer and rested your forehead against his “I'm so sorry honey” you whispered again and closed your eyes. He was determined to respect you and not get handsy with you, but the moment he saw you pulling him closer, he couldn't help doing the same; gripping your waist with large hands, just like he used to, exactly where they fit so well, he brought your bodies close together.
“Don't go, please… stay” he whispered back, his lips were almost on yours, everything felt so right at that moment even if it was wrong. You hated how it felt like playing with fire: it seemed beautiful and appealing but you would get burned no matter what.
“I'm sorry, you know I can't” you said, moving your lips just an inch further and connecting with his, earning a hungry kiss.
For someone who desperately wanted to keep away from their ex-husband, you were certainly doing a shitty job. He needed you as much as you needed him, you both wanted each other, but you broke the kiss. It couldn't happen, your relationship was as complicated as it was and you didn't want to deal with that responsibility later. His heavy breathing lingered on your skin, at the same time he placed a soft peck on your neck, knowing all your sweet spots, that devilish man Joel Miller was.
“You know you can call me, right? Anything you need, anything at all, just call me and I'll come running to you, darling, don't forget that” he whispered into your ear and more than a seducing invitation, it was a plea, from a hopelessly man in love who didn't know what to do to prove his worth.
•••
Joel's offer to call him whenever you needed was so tempting, because you didn't actually need to call him, but you wanted to. It made no sense, you were the one who wanted to keep your distance from him, but due to the latest events you found yourself wanting to see Joel each time more, just the thought of his presence brought you an excitement you tried not reading too much into it; you didn't want to admit you were crushing on your ex-husband, but then, how could you call the fact your heart raced when you saw him? How you blushed and felt sparkles whenever you touched him briefly - accidentally or not? It was tricky, it was a mess but it seemed Joel made you lose that filter that always kept you emotionally distant from everyone. After learning Sarah was alright, you felt relieved for her, and when she stopped by your home and thanked you for taking care of her, you felt that familiar warmth in your heart. It seemed the more your rational part fought for you to stay away, that you had been severely hurt by Joel and you couldn't afford giving him a chance to do the same for the second time, but your irrational side? The one driven by your feelings and desires?! That one only made you dive deeper into the Millers household. Your feelings for Sarah just grew, you were attached to her and she was attached to you, she found in you the female influence it lacked for years and she represented something you never had but wished you could. And her dad was something else… ever since that evening you spent together, having dinner, chatting and enjoying each other's company, Joel had told you you could call him anytime for any reason. It didn't matter if you wanted to talk, hang out or have him fix something at your place, he was at your will.
And then you weren't certain if your faucet was really leaking, or if your door was actually warped or if all of that had to do with the fact you were looking for an excuse to call Joel and see him. You didn't want to hire him and you didn't want to discuss feelings, talk about the past or hear all sorts of apologies, you wanted to have a nice, pleasant moment with him, just like you had the last time. It felt so familiar and yet so new; it was about the two of you being acquaintances but at the same time meeting each other, your older, more mature versions finally getting together and hitting off. That was the kind of interaction you wanted from Joel.
You just didn't know exactly how to initiate it, not without giving him any kind of hope or leading him into it.
So you decided to focus on work, like you'd been doing for over a decade. You liked your job, it was stressful as any other job in the world and the money was great. However, you had got so comfortable and used to working from home, the days you were forced to actually go to the office felt excruciating, but it was part of the deal and you had to do it. So you got up, got ready - not without texting Sarah to let her know you wouldn't be home that day - and went to do your business. It was also when you noticed something was wrong. You didn't know the car that was parked across the street, it was a little odd, as you got used to all your neighbors and it was such a calm neighborhood you simply noticed when there was someone from outside. Still, you shrugged and got into your own car, driving to work.
On your way back, all you wanted was a cool shower and some relaxing hours scattered on the couch, but you tensed up a bit when you spotted the same car you did in the morning still there. It had nothing indicating trouble, and yet, you had a gut feeling telling you it simply wasn't right, however, there was nothing you could really do about it. You thought of calling Joel, but you didn't want to risk sounding paranoid and overall crazy. What could you tell him?! That there was a car parked across the street?!
You groaned when you checked your email and saw you would have to attend a meeting at work in person the next day. You were so sure you'd solved everything up, so why would you have to go? It was probably one of those meetings that could be just a work email and it annoyed you to no end, but still, you had no other option other than attending so the next morning you were there, getting ready when you spotted the same car. You had no idea if it had spent the whole night there or if it had gotten there before you woke up, nonetheless, you were taken by the same feeling you did the day before, no matter if they were irrational or not, it was just overwhelming. After another day at work, you returned home and sighed relieved to see the car wasn't there. Maybe it had been just a paranoid episode, perhaps you were just reading too much into things and all the stress from work combined with your situation with Joel made you lose your grip on reality a little bit.
The fact was that after doing your regular house things, you decided to take a relaxing bath and sink yourself into your tub. Selecting the perfect bath bomb and adjusting the temperature, you got inside, groaning at how the warm water made your tense muscles relax and you could feel the knots undoing themselves; as you closed your eyes and relaxed, there was nothing clouding up your mind but Joel.
His handsome face, his smile, his curly graying hair. He was your Joel, but older, mode handsome, if that was even a thing, because Joel was definitely the most handsome man you'd ever met. You couldn't help yourself but picture him wrapping his strong arms around your body, perhaps a relaxing bath with Joel would feel so good, you wouldn't be able to to turn it down. Just to imagine his naked body holding yours was enough to spike so many things all over you. You didn't know if you'd ended up dozing off in the tub, but it was hard to say if any time had passed or not the moment you heard some noises around your house. You couldn't remember if you'd forgotten your TV on or something like that, you were sure you hadn't turned on the radio, but it was enough to feel goosebumps all over your skin. You left the tub, drying yourself as quick as possible and wrapping a bathrobe around your body, exiting the room as silently as you could, hearing whispering and steps all over the lower floor. You went to your room and looked outside the window, your heart racing the moment you spotted the same car you'd seen before. You didn't know what to do, you could feel the suffocating wave of anxiety taking over completely. You could hear their voices, because apparently there was more than one guy. They were robbing your home, but what would happen if they reached you? You immediately locked your bedroom door, so relieved to see your phone was thrown onto the bed. Grabbing it, you dialed the number you'd never forgotten.
•••
“Come on, darling, open up” Joel's voice was the first thing you registered after you made the call, hugged yourself against a corner of your room and closed your eyes. You had heard footsteps climbing the stairs and how the thieves banged on your door, but you remained as quiet as you could. Just praying someone would show up to save you. You'd called Joel and he called the cops on his way over, he had dropped everything he was doing when he heard the raw fear in your voice. It was horrible you had your home broken into, but it made it even worse to think of what two criminals could do with such a beautiful woman like yourself. So he grabbed Tommy and they both rushed towards your place. Arriving there almost at the same time as the cops did, finding your front door busted open and a lot of valuable things such as your TV and your laptop gone. He had a baseball bat in hands, ready to attack whoever threatened your physical integrity and when he got questioning looks from the cop, he cleared his throat and explained he was your ex-husband - and friend.
“Is that really you, Joel?” You asked in a little more than a whisper, so glad to know he was there. You walked to the door and unlocked it, seeing Joel's worried eyes scanning you to make sure you were unharmed. Only then, you realized you hadn't gotten dressed, still wrapped in your bathrobe, but it didn't matter, all you could think of was looking for shelter into his strong, safe arms, sinking your face into his chest at the same time Joel caressed your back up and down, his lips planted a kiss on top of your head and another one on your forehead, wanting to soothe you and show you how safe you were from now on. He was there for you, it wouldn't absolve him from what he'd done in the past, but that didn't even matter to you or Joel, the important thing was that he was there, he came as fast as he could only for you and he would do it a thousand times more if necessary; you both knew that.
“I got you, baby girl, I got you” Joel cooed at you, tightening the hug around your body and keeping you closer. And you had missed that embrace, you just belonged in it, and you never wanted to let go.
Joel held you through the whole process of talking to the cops, informing them about the strange car that was seen around your home and also listing every item they stole: your TV, an iPad, your laptop and your car. Even if you were safe among them, you couldn't help but feel that nervous, anxious feeling at the very possibility of being alone at home once more. Nothing happened in the end, but it could have happened, and though it sucked to have been robbed of so much valuable stuff, you weren't harmed, and that was what mattered the most to you and above all, Joel.
As the cops talked to Joel and assured they'd get in touch if any of it was found, he walked them to the door and turned back to you, finding you all shy and scared, hugging yourself and looking at him with sad eyes. You didn't want to be alone and you didn't want to have to ask him for company, you didn't want to sound whiny or pathetic, especially not after it was just a break-in without any physical damage.
“Come on, pack your bags and I'll take you home with me” Joel's voice broke the silence and made you stare at him surprised “it can be for a few days, but if you aren't comfortable with that, then let me take you at least for the night, I ain't leaving you alone. Sarah's out at her friends in a slumber party or something, you can take her bed, or mine and I'll sleep on the couch, it doesn't matter, just come…” he extended his hand to you, which you gladly took it, and made his way upstairs, waiting patiently as you grabbed a backpack and shoved a few clothes and accessories you would need. You couldn't even describe how you felt at Joel's kindness. You were so comforted, so glad to see you weren't alone and that he was willing to take care and protect you. It didn't take very long to get your backpack ready, wrapping your arms around his neck in another tight hug, thanking him for being so gentle and earning only reassuring and affectionate words.
Once you got to the truck, you were welcomed by a whiff of his familiar scent, it smelled like Joel, your Joel and your heart warmed. He glanced at you while he drove, still seeing the tension all over you and his hand rested on your knee “you must be hungry…”
“I am” you said, a little anxious and watched as he turned the wheel and changed streets. Even before getting to the address, you already knew where Joel was taking you: your favorite Taco place. You chuckled as you remembered that was your favorite date spot when you were painfully young; when life seemed so promising and Joel Miller was the man who made you stutter and sweat through your hands. Whenever he glanced towards you, your cheeks would heat up and you would feel like bursting into flames. And after you both got married, when things were still good, that was the place where he would stop by eventually, pick up some takeout and take home, as a way of spoiling and thanking you for taking care of him. As he parked, he smiled and cleared his throat.
“You know, this is our spot, I never brought any girl here, with the exception of Sarah, of course, but much to my disappointment, she isn't really into tacos, which makes it exclusively our thing” he winked at you and you nodded, a small, petty side of you felt thankful for the confirmation of Angela never been there with Joel. It was just a taco shop and yet, it was still one thing that it was so yours and Joel's and she hadn't ruined it with her touch. You felt even hungrier at that moment, relaxing to know you could have a peaceful dinner with your good memories and the man who somehow still managed to make you blush, stammer a little and sweat through your hands.
As you both munched on the food sitting down in the back of his truck, just like you did every Friday night more than a decade ago, you chuckled at how things change but somehow remain the same. He tilted his head to the side, wiping a little bit of sauce you had over your cheek, exactly like when you both were younger.
“I know this probably tastes like shit, compared to the food you've had over the years when you traveled all over the world, you know Sarah told me all about it because she really admires you an-”
You took his hand and squeezed it, then placed your hand on his chin making him look into your eyes.
“Joel… this is the best taco I've ever had, the most delicious takeout I've ever tried because you are here with me..” she whispered and smiled, seeing how his face lit up. Neither of you said it, but you were finally having that date he asked you out several months ago, when destiny decided to put the two of you together. As he saw you shivering in the cold wind, he did the honorable thing and took off his jacket, placing it over your shoulder and rubbing both of your arms. You thanked him and looked all over his truck
“We spent quite a while in here…” you shrugged “and to think I lost my virginity here… you've always been a real gentleman” you scoffed and rolled your eyes. Joel laughed and sighed
“Yeah, well, I've come along nicely, give me a chance and I'll show you” he winked, flirting a little as you shook your head in disbelief.
“Are you serious?! Fuck off, Joel Miller! No guy will ever fuck me in the back of a truck, and especially not you!” You slapped his arm playfully, hugging it and resting your chin on his shoulder, feeling the wind against your face and looking up at him.
“Joel? Can you do us both a favor?” He nodded at you wanting to hear whatever question you had to ask him “please don't let Sarah marry the first asshole she falls in love with”
“I'm on it” he replied, laughing softly and pulling you closer. Closer than you'd ever been to him, he just wished that night wouldn't end too soon.
•••
Lying in Sarah's bed was odd, to say the least; especially when Joel's room was just there, a hallway distant from you. After the moment - better saying, the moments you both had shared in the past few days and even more so that night, you felt things would escalate to another level, a level in which it didn't matter to you if it was right or wrong, It was just bound to happen. But once you got to his home, he showed you his daughter's room, the bathroom, and asked if you needed anything else and simply let you be. Which was what you wanted, it was what you had asked him to do the last time you'd shared a kiss, but at the same time you felt disappointed because you wanted more of him, more of your Joel. The sweet moments you'd spent together were weighing so heavily in your heart, and even if you hadn't forgotten about what happened, the new proximity brought a new light in your relationship with Joel; it felt nice and different, a good different and as much as you closed your eyes and tried falling asleep, you were simply taken back to the moment he held you, soothed you, caressed your skin and assured you everything was alright. Tossing and turning in bed while you wished you were somewhere else instead, anywhere really, as long as he was just next to you. At first, when the gentle strumming from the guitar got to your ears, you imagined you had dozed off for a few minutes, perhaps you had even started to dream, but when your eyes were wide open and the beautiful, familiar sound wouldn't cease, you knew that only meant one thing: Joel was playing the guitar.
It couldn't come from his bedroom, the sound was too far to be coming from there, so you knew you would have to get up and explore. Suddenly, you felt a wave of excitement. Not only did you love watching Joel play the guitar, but now you had a pretty decent and reasonable excuse to go after him. You didn't want to make things weird and be that kind of person to leave the other confused, with your dubious signs, but you were just following your heart at that moment.
You tiptoed through his house, doing your best to move in the dark, as you didn't want to startle Joel or make him think you wanted the music to stop. And then your heart skipped a beat when you looked through the window and saw him playing the guitar on his porch. The cold wind that bothered you when you both were out eating tacos seemed to have stopped, and just then you realized it was indeed warm inside the house. He was so relaxed, strumming his guitar and humming a song softly, you've always loved his singing voice, even if he was a little shy about it, you could sit down and watch him play and sing for hours. You opened the door quietly and rested against the doorframe, admiring it quietly the way he looked focused at his guitar. He played calmly and it was the most beautiful sight you could ever think of. You wouldn't be able to tell exactly how long you stood there, but when Joel looked up at you, you were already walking towards him.
“That was beautiful, Joel…”
“Just like you are, darlin'”
You both knew exactly what you wanted at that moment, how you took another step closer, one after the other and you suddenly were hovering over him. Joel placed his guitar down, he wasn't going to be able to hold himself back, not at that moment. In one single motion, he pulled you to him by the hips, a tight grasp around your body and kissing you deeply. You straddled Joel, your hands making their familiar way towards his curls, loving how they always felt under your touch. Unlike the other times you'd kissed, you knew you would both go all the way down, you wanted it, craved it and even if you knew what to do and where to touch, it also felt new, you were both were the same young couple who'd been so in love, newly married and full of hopes and dreams, but you were also a couple who'd lived separately for more than a decade, you had both experienced heartbreaks, passions, you'd tried and touched other people, but eventually, just like home, it you were drawn to each other. There was no way out. When you were shamelessly humping and groaning on top of him, Joel knew it was time to take things inside, to hell with his neighbors, he didn't care if any of them witnessed it, if anything, he wanted people to see what a lucky bastard he was to have you in his arms, that he was going to take you and make you his at least once more. So he got up, lifting you up easily, so easily, and took you inside, climbing stairs with you in his arms, he longed for you, he was hungry for your body, your taste, your touch. He needed you and Joel Miller was about to take it all. He placed you over his mattress and got rid of his shirt - his dark blue one, that looked so good on him - and let your hands wander his body. He didn't take long to undress you, nibbling your thighs in the process, he knew your body like the palm of his hand, with the exception the last time he'd visited it, his palm wasn't as calloused as it was now, just as you weren't so painfully hot as you were at that moment. You'd always been gorgeous, but at that moment, naked in his bed, it was the most beautiful and erotic thing he'd ever seen and yet he wanted it to make it forever. As he got inside of you, he didn't know how long it would last, how long you both would last, you were being way nicer and more compassionate than he would ever deserve it, but at the same time, something within said you shared the same feelings for each other.
Once you both reached your bliss, love bites, kissings, caresses and so much affection between you both, you relaxed into his arms, your head resting comfortably in his chest, and you felt at home. You still didn't know what the next day would bring you both. Perhaps you would stay together, or you would part ways for good, there was still so much to be done, to spoken, you would have to handle the fact and the consequences of not using protection with Joel, maybe that was a good reason to worry about , or not, you didn't want to think of it, just as you didn't want to think of how you both could ever explain to Sarah what happened, or how Joel would explain Tommy and you would explain your family how you got together, maybe even one day Angela could return, you'd learned the hard way life wasn't a bed of roses and you feared that if you agreed to be happy with Joel once more you would get hurt, one way or another, but all that wasn't important, not at that moment. All it mattered was you and your Joel in bed, snuggled up and worrying about nothing but each other. He nuzzled your neck, making you giggle and in return you pecked his lips once more. He wanted to say those three little words, but decided not to, not yet, instead, he wanted to show you it, now he'd had a taste of you, and he vowed himself to make you happy for the rest of his life.
He knew he had broken your heart, it was the worst thing Joel Miller had ever done, but he was going to win you back, because he wasn't going to give up happiness with you, not again.
____
A/N: besties, how did I do? Did you like it? I hope you did! I honestly had planned on writing a sad ending, I was going to make reader move on from Joel once for all, but then, is it even possible to get over him? It's impossible not to fall for him and give him a second chance. A third part is possible but I have no idea when, and feedback is always welcome my lovelies ❤️💕
Tumblr media
439 notes · View notes
sergeantbarnessdoll · 2 months
Note
Can u give me a short drabble of CE smut? Anything I'd like but damn I am in need of him right now it's killing me 😩
10 Minutes » Chris Evans
Pairings: Boyfriend!Chris Evans x Girlfriend!Reader
Summary: Y/N visits Chris on set which results in a quickie.
Warnings: Smut (18+), language, dirty talk, kissing, hickeys, unprotected sex, praise kink, use of pet names
A/N: Thank you for requesting @cevansbaby-dove 🩵
Written on my phone. I’m sorry for any mistakes and typos.
Header made by @buckys-wintersoldier
GIF IS NOT MINE! Credit goes to the creators.
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!🔞
Tumblr media Tumblr media
You and Chris were all over each other the second the door to his trailer closed. Clothes were taken off and thrown in different directions. Chris picked you up and gently laid you on the couch. He hovered over you, leaning down to kiss along your collarbones and chest, his teeth nipping at your skin to leave some hickeys behind.
“Chris…” You breathed. “We only have 10 minutes.” You say, closing your eyes and enjoying the feeling of his beard scratching across your skin.
“We have enough time, baby. Remember the times I made you to cum in 5 minutes? I’m gonna do it again.” Chris says, smirking against your chest.
Chris’s hand found it’s way to your pussy that was practically dripping. You gasped when his fingers rubbed in between your folds. You involuntarily spread your legs wider.
“Chris, please!” You whined. “Fuck me!” You begged.
Chris chuckles at your neediness. He lined his hard cock at your tight entrance, sliding it inside of you, making the both of you moan. His thrusts started off slow, but quickened. Your legs instinctively wrapped around his waist, locking your ankles behind his back. Usually Chris would take his time with you, but you two only had 10 minutes before he had to go back to work so he did what he had to do. Fucking you fast which you love.
“Chris…” You moaned, digging your nails in his back.
Your moans was like music to his ears and encouraged him to move faster. One of his hands found it’s way to your clit, rubbing it in fast circles causing your cunt to clench around his cock.
“Fuck…” Chris moans.
His other hand tightened it’s grip on your hip. A loud moan of his name left your lips when his cock hit your sweet spot. You two could care less if anyone outside of the trailer heard you guys.
“That’s it, baby. Moan my name. Let everyone know who’s making you feel this good.” He says huskily.
Your orgasm began to build up the more his cock hit your sweet spot and his fingers rubbed your clit. You arched your back in pleasure, your chest touching his.
“Chris, I- oh fuck!” You moaned, your eyes nearly rolling to the back of your head.
“I know you’re close, sweetheart. Give it to me.” He says panting.
Your eyes rolled to the back of your head and a loud moan left your lips as you came. Chris wasn’t too far behind you. After a few thrusts, he came inside of you. His thrusts came to a slow stop. He laid on top of you, being careful not to crush you. He kissed you hungrily before grabbing his phone to check the time.
“Not that I keep track, but we beat a record. We have 5 minutes to spare.” Chris says smirking.
You couldn’t help but laugh. You two kissed one more time before he pulled out of you and got dressed.
“Are you coming to my hotel room tonight?” You asked, putting your shirt on.
“You already know the answer to that, sweetheart.” Chris says, kissing you.
💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙
-Bucky’s Doll
202 notes · View notes
pink3princess · 11 months
Text
john wick x reader hc/ramble
Tumblr media
cw/tw: um..a little silly, a little goofy, a little fluff, age gap ( reader is 20+, John is in his 40’s), mentions of tattoos, gn!reader
an: I’m in my keanu reeves era; also this gif makes me dizzy🥴😵; anyways enjoy whores
masterlist
first of all heS GENTLE I DONT CARE WHAT ANYONE ELSE SAYS HES MY POOKIE BEAR CUDDLE MUFFIN
oh my god his hugs :(
i just need to lay down on his chest and for him to rub his hand up and down my back reassuringly after a long day >:(
he loves when you scratch his beard like a dog(is this weird lol) he finds it so domestic and intimate
ok so...he’s old, so let’s imagine he stayed out of the crime world… he has such old guy hobbies its so cute (he's beekeeping age yk)
he’s into gardening, he's in a band (bassist duh), he fixes up cars and motorcycles
the first time you noticed his back tattoo was when you two went swimming for the first time together
you didn't want to be a creep, but you had to stop yourself from drooling over it the rest of the day
you actually had to stop yourself from licking him head to toe like a popsicle but
speaking of tattoos, he LOOOOVES when you trace his back tattoo; if he can't sleep and you start to trace the pattern, he just melts
and if you have tattoos, he loves to do the same to you
he'll kind of lull you to sleep like that, taking his time with light kisses in between
on another note...i bet he does the 'dad on a vacation snoring so loud he has shaken then entire room awake' snore
and when you get woken up by said snore you're a little annoyed, but whenever this happens you just move to the guest room
after moving to the guest room and getting settled down, you get woken up ....again, only to see this BIG SCARY 6 FOOT ASSASSIN curled up next to you under the covers, hugging your waist as if you were a stuffed animal he couldn't sleep without :(
and you're like "...i actually came in here to remove myself from you-"
he's creeps around the house very quietly, almost like a ghost (unintentionally)
you could be doing laundry, folding the clothes and when you turn around to put them away, he's just there in the doorway like 🧍‍♂️ scaring the life out of you
once you two move in together, he'll gift you a dog :( like you're own little family :(
assuming that reader is in their 20's and john is in is 40's, how could you possibly pass up any opportunity to make old man jokes about him <3
" you know, in a couple of years i get to put you in the old folks home..."
"yeah right🙄, i'd like to see you try honey"
he takes care of you in every way; he makes sure you take your meds, and that you eat at least three meals a day; small everyday things like that :(
if you fail a big test or have a bad day at work he's waiting for you at home with a tub of icecream and ready to spoil you with affection
even tho he's a man of very little words, he'll know exactly what to say to make you feel better with words of praise and affection :(
1K notes · View notes
jamneuromain · 1 month
Note
🧚🏻‍♀️✨Bippity boppity bow chicka wow oww! You’ve been visited by the Shameless Hoe Fairy, and now you must share a hoe drabble about:
Ari + chest hair + purring like a cat
Thank you dear Hoe Fairy<3
Damn! Ari with his chest hair... a hell of a combination that I can't resist
I present to you:
Lazy Morning
Tumblr media
Warning: Dub-con (since they are married); Actor!Ari Levinson, somno, oral (mentioned just a little), fingering, p in v, fluff and smut.
W/C: ~1.5K
A/N: ...shit I totally forgot about the chest hair part
Tumblr media
A Work in Progress Masterlist
"And the Oscar goes to -" The host paused dramatically, before opening the envelop in his hand and pulling out the sheet of paper that contained the name of the winner for tonight.
"-Ari Levinson, from The Feud!"
The first action, out of sheer surprise, was to look into your soft eyes. Ari saw you gasp and cover your mouth in shock, when your eyes dampened in happiness.
He headed to the stage after kissing and hugging you, shaking hands along the way.
"... I want to thank the director Frank Adler, and our team for making The Feud to happen." He choked on his words, on your name, tears rolled heavy beneath his eyelids, "And to my beautiful wife. You mean the world to me. I love you."
...
Your wet mouth engulfed him inch by inch. Words were a slur of moaning coming out of his lips.
"F-Fuck, honey-"
His cock reached the back of your throat. So soft. So warm.
"Feels good, baby?" You whispered in your sultry voice, "Come down my throat. I want to taste you..."
His hand grabbed the back of your neck, pushing you down on his cock. Pushing you down until he was fully seated in your mouth. Until he was on the verge of exploding-.
The sun peeked through the window and the slim creek of the curtains, landing on his skin.
Among the soft incessant buzz of his phone, the faintest of stirring of you in his arms, and the sun, he woke up from slumber.
It took him a moment to recall his memories from last night. Last night was a combination of alcohol, chatting up, and tiring ceremonies.
Right. Ceremony. The Oscar.
Ari scratched his bearded chin. He might have a little problem distinguishing reality from his dream.
The ceremony and the speech, that he remembered. But the fact that you were fully clothed in pyjamas reminded him that the blurry vision he just had - the one where you took him in your mouth - was a dream.
He sighed softly into the back of your neck. The afterparty lasted until three in the morning, and both of you had been too tired to do anything besides getting ready for bed in the early hours. Which led to the fact that he was hard as fuck, and there was nothing he could do about it while you were still sleeping.
You were practically glowing in your sleep, which could be the sun kissing your skin, but still, glowing, peaceful, and he could not believe his luck, marrying you and spending the rest of his life with you.
... on second thought, maybe there was something he could do about it while you were sleeping.
Ari shamelessly slipped his hand beneath your sleeping shorts, prying it down in slow motion, until it was pulled to your knees. His fingers danced around your entrance, carefully rubbing your pussy lips and capturing your clit between his fingers.
You let out a small whine in your sleep, your back pressed to his front a little tighter.
Slick began to gather at his fingertips as he continued his motion of rubbing circles at your most sensitive parts. Ari couldn't help himself but murmur by your ears. He knew you couldn't hear in your dreams, but that didn't stop him from whispering, "So wet for me, honey. I bet you want this as much as I do, yeah?"
As if you could hear him, your walls convulsed and your thighs tightened, before your knee moved higher up on the bed, as if you were granting him access in your sleep.
"Honey..." He murmured, his gaze unwavering, landing on your slick-coated pussy, "if I didn't know any better, I'd say you're awake and wanting. Such a pretty invitation for me, won't you say?"
He pumped his shaft with the slick on his fingers. The tip slowly sunk itself into your velvety walls, as he grunted due to the tightness.
"Fuck, honey, fuck." Ari panted into your neck. His lips pressed into your soft and smooth skin, trailing his kiss to the point where your neck met your shoulder.
You mewled, clawing his arm that circled your waist, moaning in your sleep: "Ari..."
"Yes, honey, I'm right - umph - here." Ari pushed himself all the way in, his legs wedged between your knees, forcing them to open wide as he bottomed out.
"Ari...?" Your eyelashes batted before blinking your eyes open. Half of your consciousness still drowning in the peaceful sleep you had, and the other half bathing in the wet dream - the wet reality where you woke up with the twisted coil of desire burning in your guts.
The thought of your husband taking you in your sleep only added fuel to the fire. You can feel your pussy clenched down hard on his thick cock when his slow but hard thrust hurt your cervix in the most delicious way possible.
A throaty moan was pushed out of your lips when another thrust rearranged your insides. Your hand clung to the iron clad he had to your waist, preventing yourself from slamming into the headboard.
"Love you so much, honey," He groaned loudly as your body responded to him by moving along the rhythm he set. The filthy squelch as your dripping pussy took all of him in hungrily, pounding the life out of you.
You chanted his name like a prayer when he had you come on his cock, when his cum pumped into you, coating your walls with his spend.
Catching your breath and your mind gradually, your fingers intertwined with his, before turning your head and looking his way: "For a second, I thought it was my birthday."
Ari huffed out a laugh. His beard scratched your jaw as he kissed every inch of your skin he could reach. With the morning sex as a wake-up call, he sure could turn this into a habit for your mutual celebrations. A small smile crept up his lips as he spoke, "I think we have some left-over pie in the fridge, 'course we could make it your birthday."
His phone buzzed again, making him curse under his breath.
"Take it." You teased him softly, tapping your knuckle on his chest, "Otherwise the headline tomorrow would be The Disappearance of Oscar-winner Ari Levinson."
Ari reached his long arm to grab his phone. Scamming through the messages and phone calls, he picked a few to answer briefly before tossing his phone aside, burying his face into your neck, and inhaling deeply.
In a few hours, he would have an interview with Variety, and later iMDb. After that, he would be shipped off to Norway via airplane for his new movie which still needed a few weeks in a god-forsaken forest. While you too had your work later tonight, he couldn't help but ask, "Can you stay with me before I go?"
"Sure." You combed through his hair with your fingers. He grew his hair and beard for his new caveman movie in Norway, and now he was fuzzy all over. Sometimes you wonder whether you have a man for your husband, or that he is merely a werebear that loves to pin you under with his weight, "how much time do we have before you go?"
"My flight takes off at 4:45pm." He grumbled into your neck, "Four, five hours...? When are you needed for work?"
You turned to look at him, "Five-ish."
"Good." His hand splayed possessively over your stomach, "That means we can spend some more time on..." He squeezed your tummy suggestively, "celebration."
You could practically imagine him wiggling his eyebrows as he said so. Chuckling, you placed his hands where they needed to be - your spine, "Celebration should wait," you laid comfortably on your stomach, "someone isn't getting any celebration until they fix my waist - bending me around and all that."
Ari sighed in defeat and started working on the stiff muscles on your back - the fact that he did bend your legs in your sleeping form left him speechless and somewhat embarrassed for springing out on you.
With his magical hands doing their best, it was not long until you started humming in content, and his dick twitched in excitement.
His hands began to descend lower and lower, closer to your ass every time he massaged your back.
"You know, I think the massage would perform one hundred percent if you take your sleeping shirt off." His hand glided dangerously close to your core, before shifting his position and muttering by your ear.
"God, you're awful." A breathy groan left your lips as the knots on your back untwined.
"Too bad, you're not going anywhere," Ari lowered himself to kiss your bare back - this smooth bastard had just flipped your sleeping shirt upwards to grant himself better access, "Mrs. Levinson."
137 notes · View notes
toxicanonymity · 1 year
Note
CNC!Joel x chubby!fem reader? I'd be so happy 🥲
Hello! I'm not currently doing requests for reader body types / appearance, but I hope this works for what you're looking for. master list
Joel Miller CNC (consensual noncon)
Joel x Fem!reader, NSFW 18+ CNC PIV (pre-established consent prior to story), dub-con, unsafe, post-outbreak
Tumblr media
You never know when he's going to tenderly make love to you, brutally ravage you, or somewhere in between. You can’t get enough of him regardless, and Joel knows it. When he gets home, you’re sitting on a stool, simmering some broth over the wood stove to go with the jerky tonight. “Hey handsome,” you say without turning away from the wood stove. He doesn’t respond, just takes off his jacket. When you look up at him, he has that dark look in his eyes.
His boots thud as he walks toward you, rolling up his sleeves. The veins on his hands and arms are swollen and he wears even more of a scowl than usual. It must have been a bad day. You swallow and stand up. He looks you up and down and takes a deep breath as you wait, heart racing, fidgeting with a button on your shirt. Then, he walks right into you, and you almost trip on the stool. He pushes you up against the living room wall. His hand wraps around your jaw, and he kisses you forcefully, his tongue invading your mouth while his other hand plunges into your pants.
He grunts in approval when he feels how moist you are, then he takes his fingers from your cunt and puts them in your mouth and you suck while he pins you to the wall with his arousal throbbing into you. He swells harder as you suck his fingers, then he rips your shirt open, sending buttons flying, but you’re used to sewing them back on.
He yanks down your bra and his face dives between your breasts. He uses his big, rough hands to feed himself your tits, devouring them with open-mouth kisses. He grinds his arousal into you, humming "Mmm" into your breasts, with his eyes closed and a pained look on his face.
Then his thick arms wrap around you. It almost feels like an embrace until his strong biceps wrangle you onto the floor. You’re face up on top of an old, thin rug. You say, “The bed would be more-” as you begin to sit up, but he forces you back down on the rug.
He tears your pants and underwear off, then holds you down with one hand on your hip, making it clear you’re not to move. He pulls his pants and boxers down to mid thigh. The sight of his thick, hard cock never fails to send a pang of need right through you, especially with his masculine hand wrapped around it while he readies himself. He forces your legs apart, then aligns himself and plunges all the way into you, no time to adjust. You groan at his girth. He backs out all but the tip then rams into you again. Your eyes prickle, overwhelmed by his length, and your vision gets cloudy as you try to focus on the bounce of his salt and pepper hair.
Meanwhile, he focuses on the bounce of your tits each time he buries himself deep inside you. He leans over you, his denim buttons pressing into your flesh, his dark eyes sending a chill down your spine. Then, he bites and sucks your neck as he pounds you with his cock and his beard scratches your jaw. Soon you feel yourself closing in on your climax.
He fucks you unforgivingly, a primal grunt with each powerful thrust, his pace increasing. The vein in his neck bulges. He growls your name into your neck and it sends you over the edge. You clench around him and moan. You try to kiss him and he won’t let you. He pounds you through your orgasm, then pulls out. He pumps himself twice then his hot creamy seed spills onto your stomach.
His chest rises and falls as he catches his breath. He taps your thigh affectionately and lets you sit up. Then he kisses you tenderly, cupping your cheek in his hand.
-
all joel: @ethanhoewke @silkiers @eiviea
642 notes · View notes
vanwritesfan-fiction · 7 months
Note
If you're taking requests I have one 😋
"We were made for each other"
Either Travis or Jack!
Travis spent most of his time taking care of others. When he wasn't supporting his teammates on the field, he was an excellent husband and father, and while he'd never complain about it, you knew that sometimes it was all a bit too much.
On one particular Sunday he came home from his road game, and he seemed a bit off. He was unusually quiet, locking himself away in his office as soon as he got home. You were immediately concerned, but you didn't want to worry the kids, so you just made up a quick excuse and decided to talk to Travis once they were in bed.
You knocked softly on Travis' office door, letting yourself after a few seconds. "Hey, baby." Travis didn't hear you, too focused on the TV, looking over some game tape.
He startled when you put your hands on his shoulders, feeling all of the tight muscle knots along his back. "Hey, I didn't hear you come in." He whispered, giving you a weak smile.
You pulled up a chair to him, placing your hands on his thighs.
"What's going on? Did something happen this weekend?" You knew they were coming off a loss this weekend, but the team had played well all things considered, and Travis usually shook it off before he got home.
"How did Alex's game go yesterday." He scratched at his beard, avoiding eye contact with you. "It was good, don't change the subject, Kelce." Travis chuckled, leaning forward and resting his forearms on his legs, so your faces were only inches apart.
"I don't know, I think I'm just in my head." You rubbed his forearm as he spoke. "I was off of my game, and all of these people online are saying I'm past my prime and that I should just retire before I embarrass myself."
"Do you agree with them?" You stroked his knuckles with your thumb. It was incredibly difficult to get Travis to open up and be vulnerable, so you were trying to tread lightly.
"If you would've asked me last year, I would have said no, but I don't know, maybe people are right. Maybe its time I retire." He sat back in his chair, placing his hands on his head.
"Mhm. Okay." You stood up and grabbed an empty cardboard box before you walked over to the shelves where Travis had his accolades displayed. You took his Espy awards and placed them gently in the box before making your way to the glass boxes where his Super Bowl rings were displayed.
"Hey, what are you doing?" Travis asked frantically, rushing over to you.
"Oh, I just thought we should probably ship these off to those people online. If you think they control your career and get to decide when you retire, maybe they deserve all the praise for everything you've accomplished, too."
"Alright, alright, I get it." Travis took the box from you, placing it on the ground.
"Travis, only you get to decide when you retire, not me, not the Chiefs organization, and especially not some online assholes who hide behind a screen."
Travis wrapped you up in his arms, placing a gentle kiss on your lips. You rested your head on his chest as he held you. "You're the only one who knows how to get me out of my head like this. I don't know what I'd do without you, peaches."
You giggled at the pet name looking up at your husband.
"I don't know what I'd do without you either, Boo Bear. We were made for each other."
379 notes · View notes
octuscle · 5 months
Note
Hi! I got a crush on my coach, Alex. I really wanna have a surprise for him. Can Cronivac make us grow together at locker rooms after a good workout?
Today is a good opportunity. The other lads have all disappeared already…. You're alone in the locker room when Coach Alex walks in the door. "So, Michael? Are you happy with today's training?" "Coach, there's always room for improvement. But I'll do my best!" "Good boy." Damn, can't you do better than a bit of small talk? Then I'll have to intervene.
Alex stands in front of the mirror and does a double bicep pose. "What do you say, Muchael? Not bad for an old man, is it?" You grin and say that he's hardly older than you. He laughs. "Brother, I could be your father!" "Well, you don't have much more beard growth than me, Aled." You follow Aled's example and post in front of the mirror. You can literally see your biceps growing. Aled reaches under your arms and corrects your pose. "Brother, more body tension. People can't see your hot body like that." He presses on your stomach. "And tighten your six-pack more, Muchaed!" "Coach, shall we go back to the training area? I could do with a few tips." Almed scratches his beard. "Don't call me coach, bro! And now let's get those muscles burning!"
Fuck, when did Coach get inked like that? Your family would kill you if you came up with that idea… But it looks cool on him… You look in the mirror. You two could be related. At least you look like you have the same hairdresser. The dark hair radically short. And a bushy, godly full beard. Ahmed asks you to show your thighs. You pull up your trouser legs.
Tumblr media
"Damn Muchamed! You're an beast!" Is Ahmed getting a hard-on? That wouldn't be bad, your cut cock is already half hard. A wet spot forms in his pants. He gets down on his knees and massages your huge thighs. Your hard-on is almost painful. But Ahmad has mercy. "Fuck, Muhammed, is everything so huge with you?" You laugh. "Then start sucking the balls, brother. They're a bit smaller than what you'll have to swallow."
I'd say you've grown together, brother!
Great pic found @malesbros
144 notes · View notes