#a great book to be reading right now

[july-19th-club]

i know for a fact i have made this post before but for me it's very important that bbc merlin is a pointless tragedy. it wouldn't be good (it's frequently not good anyway but it would be a lot further away from good) if it wasn't a pointless tragedy! it's simply not arthuriana if it doesn't go past the high point of the heroic/legendary/high medieval romance stuff and end with detailed rundowns of exactly how everybody got betrayed and died like that is what makes it real arthuriana to me and not just a silly show about a wizard

#'why did he die at the end! why did they make us miserable? why can't we have nice things!' #BECAUSE IT'S ARTHURIANA OKAY .that's what HAPPENS #if you're doing arthuriana you're not doing it right unless when you finally get to the end of this endless string of knight adventures #the main guy is like. dead and you're like well . what am i supposed to do now #like when i first read the great illustrated classic abridged king arthur in third grade and got to the end ofi t #and guinevere had been sent to a nunnery and half the nights had died in this battle or that one and merlin had been stuck in a cave #and then arthur dies and bedivere chucks his sword in a lake and then the book just ENDS #and i sat there consumed with emotions id never felt before. well i would've been disappointed if the end of bbc merlin had #NOT made me feel those emotions again #but it did. to me that is in fact its greatest success #merlin #q #like. dont get me wrong i like a fixfic as much as the next guy and in fact i plot them out all the time #but you cant DO that if the original material is. like. already happy #or meant to be

[etoilesombre]

Hey, do you guys want to hear a story? Let me tell you about the romance between Lancelot and Guinevere, as recounted in Sir Thomas Malory's Le Morte d'Arthur.

So, I thought I knew the basics. I grew up reading modern versions of Arthurian legend that focused on other aspects, but had a general knowledge of the Arthur-Guinever-Lancelot love triangle. It didn't show up too much, but I assumed it was subtext in some other versions. What I picked up was that it was sort of pure, almost an ot3, and not the cause of a lot of problems. 

My friends. In this version it is NOT SUBTEXT, it DEFINITELY CAUSED PROBLEMS, and it is WILD. It is a true will-they-won't-they drama fest soap opera romance, and I need to share. So please, come on this journey with me.

[I’m looking at you, Black Sails fandom people. I need you to know that Flint canonically would have read this. He would almost certainly have also grown up hearing these stories. I’m not saying he’s Lancelot coded, but I am saying it's interesting that he would have been aware that was something it was possible to be.]

A couple notes, before we dive in. I am very much just summarizing what happened in the book. The thing is, the book is a million pages long and also in Middle English, and this is just one of many plots, which I think is why it's not more widely known. I will show some excerpts so you can get a feel for the text, but you don’t need to read them to understand the story. I'm referring to a version that is as close to the manuscript as I can find, though with spelling regularized. For real fun, see what the original looked like. Malory purports to be translating part of the French Vulgate cycle, which likely is where the character of Lancelot originates, but in fact he is doing much more than translating, and compiles other stories as well. Point being, when he says “so the French book sayeth” etc, that is the “book” to which he is referring. Because of my lack of knowledge about the language and cultural context, this lecture series from Mythgard Academy was absolutely invaluable to my understanding. I cannot recommend it highly enough. Inevitably, some of the opinions of the prof are reflected here. I do not have it in me to compare the scholarship of various medievalists right now, I just want to tell you about this DRAMA. 

Let’s start with a prophecy. When Arthur decides he wishes to marry Guinevere, Merlin advises him to take someone else, because if he takes her, she will betray him with Lancelot and it will destroy his kingdom. All of this is foretold, not only to us, but to Arthur himself. Of course he takes her anyway, and all is doomed from the start.

As we begin the main arc of this story (several books after the prophecy), Lancelot is widely acknowledged to be the best and most renowned knight of Arthur’s court. He is plainly and hopelessly in love with Guinevere, and she loves him in return. Arthur doesn’t have a problem with this - who wouldn’t love Guinevere? This sort of love is socially acceptable, so long as they do not sleep together, which would be treason. Arthur in fact seems to support their love, because it means that Lancelot will be Guinevere’s champion should she need one. This is a role Arthur himself legally cannot fill because he is the king, and so would have to be the judge. Lancelot is indeed a good champion for her, and fights for her when she is wrongly accused of murder. 

Lancelot is deeply chivalrous, in a way that seems sincere. This is a great place for a first excerpt, a conversation with a Random Damsel Lancelot has been helping:

‘Now, damosel,’ said Sir Lancelot, ‘will ye any more service of me?’ ‘Nay, sir,’ she said, ‘at this time, but almighty Jesu preserve you wheresoever ye ride or go, for the most courteous knight thou art and meekest unto all ladies and gentlewomen that now liveth. But one thing, sir knight, me thinks ye lack, ye that are a knight wifeless, that ye will not love some maiden or gentlewoman. For I could never hear say that ever ye loved any of no manner of degree, and that is great pity. But it is noised that ye love Queen Guenivere, and that she hath ordained by enchantment that ye shall never love no other but her, nor no other damosel nor lady shall rejoice you; wherefore there be many in this land of high estate and low that make great sorrow.’ ‘Fair damosel,’ said Sir Lancelot, ‘I may not warn* people to speak of me what it pleaseth them; but for to be a wedded man, I think it not; for then I must couch with her, and leave arms and tournaments, battles and adventures. And as for to say to take my pleasance with paramours, that will I refuse, in principal for dread of God. For knights that be adventurous should not be adulterers nor lecherous, for then they be not happy nor fortunate unto the wars; for either they shall be overcome with a simpler knight than they be themselves, or else they shall slay by unhap and their cursedness better men than they be themselves. And so who that useth paramours shall be unhappy, and all thing unhappy that is about them.’ 

So after doing his Knightly Deeds for this damsel, Lancelot asks if she needs anything else. She says no, but you are lacking one thing, which is the love of a woman. It is rumored that is because Guinevere has through sorcery made you love only her, and that causes all of the women great sorrow. In reply Lancelot makes this speech about how he cannot have a wife or paramour and be a good knight, but everyone thinks it is at least in part because his love is reserved for Guinevere.

Now, throughout the book his chastity DOES notably cause all of the women great sorrow. Everyone wants to sleep with Lancelot. Literally he is kidnapped by the four most beautiful queens other than Guinevere, and they say he has to choose one of them as a lover (not even a wife, a lover) or else die. He says he would rather die, though in the end he escapes. This is just an example, truly it is a recurring problem for him. He is, at one point, tricked into sleeping with a woman with whom he conceives his son Galahad (as was prophesied, it's a long story and the romance is only part of it. It is worth mentioning that something similar happens to Arthur, which is how Mordred is sired.) When Guinevere learns that Lancelot has been with someone else, she is angry and banishes him from the court. They still love each other and eventually reconcile. 

So, Lancelot goes on the quest for the holy grail. But he fails, specifically because while he is outwardly dedicated to God, in his private heart he is still dedicated to Guinevere. And so he makes a vow to renounce his love for her, acknowledging that it is beyond measure (beyond what is right, even if they have not technically done anything wrong.) However when he returns to Camelot, he cannot keep this vow, as we see. 

Then, as the book saith, Sir Lancelot began to resort unto Queen Guenivere again, and forgot the promise and the perfection that he made in the quest. For, as the book saith, had not Sir Lancelot been in his privy thoughts and in his mind so set inwardly to the Queen as he was in seeming outward to God, there had no knight passed him in the quest of the Sangrail, but ever his thoughts were privily on the Queen. And so they loved together more hotter than they did beforehand, and had many such privy draughts together that many in the court spoke of it, and in especial Sir Agravain, Sir Gawain’s brother, for he was ever open-mouthed. So it befell that Sir Lancelot had many resorts of ladies and damosels that daily resorted unto him to be their champion: in all such matters of right Sir Lancelot applied him daily to do for the pleasure of Our Lord Jesu Christ. And ever as much as he might he withdrew him from the company of Queen Guenivere for to eschew the slander and noise, wherefore the Queen waxed wroth with Sir Lancelot.

He and Guinevere start spending a lot of time alone together, and so there are rumors circulating about them in court. In order to put a stop to the rumors, Lancelot starts paying other women attention and doing more good knightly deeds for them. Guinevere is terribly jealous, but he tells her it's for their own good, and also tells her about the vow he made, and his concern that their love is beyond what is appropriate. She is devastated, and weeping banishes him from the court (again). 

Lancelot then rides in a tournament, disguised. (Why? Because this is simply a thing knights do.) To make it an effective disguise he takes the token of a woman, the sleeve of the fair maid of Astolat to wear on his helm. When she discovers that he was only using it for the disguise, and he does not indeed love her, she is so heartbroken that she says if he will not marry her or be her lover, she will die. He refuses, on the grounds that love must not be constrained and should arise from the heart, and offers her a thousand pounds a year instead if she marries anyone else. Properly insulted by this, she does indeed die. She has her body sent in a boat to Camelot, with a letter in her hand, saying that she died of her love for him, that he would not return. 

Seeing this, Guinevere reconciles with Lancelot, presumably reassured by the fact that he would let this very beautiful much younger woman die of her love rather than being with her. She insists that from now on he will not fight in disguise, and will openly bear her token. 

Then Queen Guenivere sent for Sir Lancelot, and said thus: ‘I warn you that ye ride no more in no jousts nor tournaments but that your kinsmen may know you; and at these jousts that shall be ye shall have of me a sleeve of gold. And I pray you for my sake to force* yourself there, that men may speak you worship. But I charge you as ye will have my love, that ye warn your kinsmen that ye will bear that day the sleeve of gold upon your helmet.’ ‘Madam,’ said Sir Lancelot, ‘it shall be done.’ And either made great joy of other.

It is important to keep in mind that, to this point, there is no textual evidence that they were sleeping together, and a great deal of evidence that it was important to Lancelot that they not cross that line. There is much less evidence that this is important to Guinevere.

So then one fateful day in May, Guinevere goes picnicing with an entourage of knights. They are captured by someone else who is in love with Guinevere, and taken back to his castle, but she manages to send a message to Lancelot. At the castle, she insists that her knights sleep in her bedchamber on the grounds that they were wounded in the battle when she was captured and need tending, but truly she wants them there to keep her captor from raping her. 

Lancelot arrives to rescue her, and the person who kidnapped her agrees to give her back in the morning. She tells Lancelot to visit her room in the night. He climbs up to her window, which is barred. They have a heartfelt reunion and she says she wishes he could come in to her. He acquiesces and breaks the bars to get into her room, cutting his hand to the bone to do so. Despite the profusely bleeding wound and the ten other men sleeping in the room, they at last do sleep together, in this passionate blood covered consummation. He sneaks back out and replaces the bars.

In the morning, the man who kidnapped Guinevere comes in and sees blood all over the bed. He accuses her of being unfaithful to the king, saying she lay with one of the knights who had been sleeping in her room. She denies it, but it is very clear that she did sleep with someone who was bleeding. 

Lancelot says he will fight to defend her from this accusation, which is right and proper because he is her champion. In this story people take trial by combat and oaths before God very seriously, especially Lancelot. He really does try. So he swears an oath that he will prove with his life that Guinevere did not sleep with one of the wounded knights who lay in her room. This of course is TRUE, but only on a technicality. Lancelot, having slept with her himself the night before, is also the one who defends her honor after. I love this story so much. 

Instead of fighting him, the kidnapper takes Lancelot captive. In captivity he encounters ANOTHER damsel who insists that sleep with her in order for her to help him. He refuses, still faithful in his heart to Guinevere. Eventually she settles for him holding and kissing her, which is not across the line of appropriateness apparently, giving us some idea of where that line is drawn. Anyway, Lancelot gets out, fights for Guinevere and wins. There are indications that he feels like he barely dodged a devine bullet. 

Guinevere and Lancelot return to Camelot. Finally the rumors about them are true, the deed has been done, but of course nothing appears particularly different as there were already rumors about them. Two knights, Mordred and Agravaine, who have been intriguing against Arthur already, go and tell Arthur that Guinevere is being untrue to him. Here is his response: 

‘If it be so,’ said the King, ‘wit you well, he is none other; but I would be loath to begin such a thing but I might have proofs of it. For Sir Lancelot is a hardy knight, and all ye know that he is the best knight among us all; and but if he be taken with the deed he will fight with him that bringeth up the noise, and I know no knight that is able to match him. Therefore, and it be sooth as ye say, I would that he were taken with the deed.’ For as the French book saith, the King was full loath that such a noise should be upon Sir Lancelot and his queen. For the King had a deeming of it; but he would not hear thereof, for Sir Lancelot had done so much for him and for the Queen so many times that, wit you well, the King loved him passingly well.

Arthur says he will not hear of this without proof, because if Lancelot is accused and allowed to fight he would beat anyone. And, it is said that Arthur had some idea of the affair, but would not credit it because Lancelot had done so much for him and Guinevere, and he loved Lancelot greatly. 

So, one night when the king is away hunting, the two accusers contrive to catch them in the act, with a group of twelve armed knights. They do find Lancelot in Guinevere’s chamber, but the text is notably, pointedly vague about whether they are actually in bed. In any case, Lancelot asks for a trial. The knights say no, they have caught him and so may kill him. He is Lancelot, so he kills all of them instead, save one (Mordred) whom he leaves wounded. Lancelot flees, intending to return to rescue Guinevere and take her to his own castle to protect her from Arthur’s wrath. He maintains her innocence, and still intends that they will all reconcile.

Guinevere is to be burned at the stake (normal in this situation). Lancelot rescues her from the burning at the last moment, killing a number of knights of the round table. Arthur seems to blame the accusers more than Guinevere and Lancelot (for good reason; keep in mind that the romance is a subplot, there is a great deal of political intrigue going on.) Now a war will begin, whether anyone wants it or not, because of the people Lancelot killed. Lancelot takes Guinevere to his own castle. Battle lines are drawn, and Lancelot and Arthur confront each other in the fighting:

And ever was King Arthur about Sir Lancelot to have slain him, and ever Sir Lancelot suffered him and would not strike again. So Sir Bors encountered with King Arthur; and Sir Bors smote him, and so he alit and drew his sword and said to Sir Lancelot, ‘Sir, shall I make an end of this war?’—for he meant to have slain him. ‘Not so hardy,’ said Sir Lancelot, ‘upon pain of thy head, that thou touch him no more! For I will never see that most noble king that made me knight neither slain nor shamed.’ And therewith Sir Lancelot alit off his horse and took up the King and horsed him again, and said thus: ‘My lord the king, for God’s love, stint this strife, for ye get here no worship and I would do my utterance. But always I forbear you, and ye nor none of yours forbear not me. And therefore, my lord, I pray you remember what I have done in many places, and now am I evil rewarded.’ So when King Arthur was on horseback he looked on Sir Lancelot; then the tears burst out of his eyes, thinking of the great courtesy that was in Sir Lancelot more than in any other man. And therewith the King rode his way and might no longer behold him, saying to himself, ‘Alas, alas, that yet this war began!’

So Arthur tries to slay Lancelot, but Lancelot, the better fighter, refuses to slay him and indeed when Arthur is unhorsed Lancelot forbids that he be slain, and gives him his own horse. Arthur weeps for the honor that is in Lancelot, and laments that the war began. 

The pope intervenes and tries to negotiate an end. Lancelot confirms that he is willing to return Guinevere to Arthur, and says he has always been willing to do this and will still defend her honor, but that he does not feel he can do so because Arthur has listened to liars and been misled, and he had more reason to take her away than the accusation of adultery - he does not trust she can be safe in that court, with things as they are. 

Eventually they do make a deal, with some assurances, and he surrenders Guinevere to the king. He kisses her openly, says that he will leave, but should she be in danger or ever again accused of being untrue, he will fight for her as he always has. He departs the court forever, to much great sorrow, and returns to his own lands. 

The war continues - eventually Mordred seizes the throne, Arthur kills him in battle but is mortally wounded himself and passes to Avalon. Following the king’s death, although her love would no longer be adulterous, Guinevere retires to a convent rather than reuniting with Lancelot. He seeks her out, and this is her reaction: 

Sir Lancelot was brought before her; then the Queen said to all those ladies, ‘Through this same man and me hath all this war been wrought, and the death of the most noblest knights of the world; for through our love that we have loved together is my most noble lord slain. Therefore, Sir Lancelot, wit thou well I am set in such a plight to get my soul health; and yet I trust through God’s grace and through His Passion of His wounds wide, that after my death I may have a sight of the blessed face of Christ Jesu, and at Doomsday to sit on His right side;* for as sinful as ever I was, now are saints in heaven. And therefore, Sir Lancelot, I require thee and beseech thee heartily, for all the love that ever was betwixt us, that thou never see me no more in the visage. And I command thee, on God’s behalf, that thou forsake my company; and to thy kingdom look thou turn again, and keep well thy realm from war and wrack. For as well as I have loved thee heretofore, my heart will not serve now to see thee, for through thee and me is the flower of kings and knights destroyed. And therefore go thou to thy realm, and there take ye a wife and live with her with joy and bliss. And I pray thee heartily to pray for me to the everlasting Lord that I may amend my misliving.’ ‘Now, my sweet madam,’ said Sir Lancelot, ‘would ye that I should turn again unto my country, and there to wed a lady? Nay, madam, wit you well, that shall I never do, for I shall never be so false unto you of that I have promised. But the self* destiny that ye have taken you to, I will take me to, for the pleasure of Jesu; and ever for you I cast me specially to pray.

Rather than rejoicing in Lancelot’s presence, Guinevere laments that their love brought about the downfall of the Arthurian court, and the deaths of the knights of the round table and King Arthur. She calls upon Lancelot, by all the love that was ever between them to leave her presence, telling him to marry someone else if he wishes and see her no more. Lancelot replies that he wants no one else, and that he will respect her wishes, but will also renounce the world and join a religious order. He asks Guinevere for a final parting kiss, which she denies him. 

When Guinevere lies dying of illness, Lancelot sets out to go to her, having had a vision. She knows of his coming, and prays to die before she sees him, because she cannot bear it. She dies a half hour before he arrives, leaving instruction that he is to tend to her body, and then lay it to rest beside that of her lord King Arthur. Lancelot does this with great sorrow, and after ceases to eat or drink, and within weeks is dead himself. 

And there you have it, the love affair that doomed Camelot.

HUGE DISCLAIMER: Any and all mistakes or misinterpretations are my own. This is what I gathered, but I am not a medievalist. I am barely an interested layperson. I’m just a random fic writer who got obsessed with research for a story, and had to share this tragic mess. 

#i have a million thoughts about this #and there is a great deal of context that would be helpful #but i this doesnt need to be more than 4k words long so #i may do a followup post if there is interest #but black sails folks #i'm writing a lot of flintmadi convos right now #and vaguely planned to have them talk about this book #as a way to discuss their own situation and values #but i had not actually read it #and it is WAY MORE than i expected #anyway they are going to refer back to it #so i figured i should write it down so i can point at it if readers want to know wtf they are talking about #is there an #arthurian legend #tag? #i purposefully haven't looked i don't go here if there is a here to go #but fuck it that was a lot of work might as well see #anyway there are so many things to dig into here #arthur's role or lack thereof #(the rest of the book has a lot more to do with him) #the treatment of fate and prophesy #the courtly love tradition #how this fits into the arthurian tradition as a whole #and the clear french influence #vs the old celtic stories #also so many fun things about language in general #did you know that paramour is derived basically the same way as paramilitary? #'para' as 'beyond that which is regular' #also in middle english negatives are additive rather than canceling each out out! #fun facts

[wishuponroses]

I adore how Tatsuya Endo writes his characters, especially the women. They can be warm, soft, cute, cool, tough, scary... all, if not most, of his ladies in Spy x Family are equally wonderful in their own way, both in character design and personality.

#I haven't felt this passionate about an ongoing series in a while #I still need to finish the anime and see the movie and I'm reading the manga... but yeah #I'm glad I have found something to be passionate about again... especially Franky? #Like... okay so... I feel like I always fall for sometimes princes or leader type characters or a character with a remarkable power #But Franky is... just a simple man in his mid-thirties #I love his design and kind personality towards Anya and his playful side when teasing Loid #And I get so upset over his past and I really hope that he can achieve happiness #Like #I've come to a point in my life that I don't need anything grand to happen #That living life simply is okay to do #And Spy x Family is kinda... helping me with that? Like it's motivating #Back in college I wanted to become a great children's author; I still can. I would love to write a book about my dragon characters #But right now... I am okay with being a DSP and becoming a future cat lady #Spy x Family

[gxlden-angels]

I think it's so funny when Christian flat out reject the concept of being intersex like oh so me and about 2% of the population aren't real but you expect me to believe homeboy's gonna come back after (holy) ghosting us for over 2000 years?

#I plan on coming out to my dad as trans this weekend #And thought about the time I explained what intersex is to my uncle #and how he flat out refused to except it as a real thing #which is fuckin wild #male and female should be used as adjectives not nouns #cause there's so many factors that contribute to biological sex that it'd be easier to say every person is their own sex #but yea i'm medically considered intersex cause of my flavor of PCOS #and other issues #it's just so wild cause you'd think that would be a great 'miracle' for them to brag about #'Look at science say there's female and male but Jesus says in Galatians there is no male and female because we are all one in Christ.' #Like the opportunity was literally right there #oh well #florida gov ronald desantis if ur reading this you know what would be so fuckin funny for you to say right now? #also I'll be back on the book soon I've been Working. got 38.5 hours the past 2 weeks tho let's gooo (limit is 40 as a pt student) #[pt working and full time student not pt student] #bro fundie christians' obsession with sex/genitalia in general is fuckin wild #ex christian #religious trauma

[thebraxiatelcollection]

Is anybody else's relationship with Doctor Who currently all over the place like a rollercoaster at the moment, or is it just me?

I do love this show and what it has done to me and the friends and opportunities I've had through it and I will always be thankful for it making the person I am today, but I just feel like the last few years it has not been as it should be in terms of writing and quality control? I don't know how else to describe it.

I have been doing my best to completely ignore the bits of Doctor Who that I don't like and focus on the areas that I do like, and I really want to get back into the expanded universe / classic series again, I think.

I've taken a step back from the fandom recently and been trying to dive into other stuff, but maybe I should try and just pick up a random doctor who books or audios to get me into the spirit of things again.

#dw negativity #doctor who #my benny books specifically have been saying i need to pick up the rest of the series of vnas and continue reading them #and they are right! #i started reading the almost people in december and its now march and ive still not finished it #but i have been in such a slump with books and audios lately #like i want to be so excited for ncuiti gatwa i know hes going to be incredible #hes a fantastic actor and his passion for acting and the show is great #but ehhhh #with everything going on and it going with the timeless child plotline / streaming thing #not sure how i feel

[toffeelemon]

I don’t feel like our love is brand new. There must have been lovers, soulmates, before us, experiencing what we get to have. And it’s giving me comfort to imagine there will be many more like us to come. Our kind of love is the kind of love that makes this rotten world worth living in.

prince simon in madrid

a pilgrimage along the world that @prince-simon created 🥹

Simon’s neighbourhood, Chueca

“It’s actually the Queer Neighbourhood of Madrid, and coincidentally also where I live.” He lowered his voice as if to tell a secret, “It’s actually not a coincidence at all.” (chapter 2)

Casa de Campo (view from the Royal Palace lol oop)

Wilhelm didn’t even recognise himself. He didn’t think he’d ever looked that happy. And Simon… his eyes were closed and his curls were a mess and Wilhelm had never seen anyone more beautiful. (chapter 3)

El Retiro

Simon looked at Wilhelm much too adoringly for a statement this goofy. “The ducks are gay!” He yelled at Santiago and Paula, “Just so you know!” (chapter 9)

Palacio de Cristal

“Here’s a funny thought - bear with me, okay? But just imagine. Flowers. Everywhere, like on the ceiling, up the walls. Fairy lights scattered all through it. It would be so gorgeous as a- uh, like. For a wedding…” Realising where his train of thought had gotten him, Wilhelm fell quiet, looking at Simon with wide eyes. (chapter 9)

El Palacio Real de Madrid (more specifically the Throne Room lmfao)

Simon traced his fingers over the bruises on Wilhelm’s neck and in the opening of his dress shirt, humming contentedly. Wilhelm followed the movement in the mirror, and marvelled at how good they looked together, how well they fit together and how much Simon belonged right here – on the throne, with Wilhelm. He deserved the world and so much more. (chapter 12)

Museo Nacional del Prado

Around them, the other visitors kept moving, admiring the art on the walls, and for the moment Wilhelm felt infinite, imagining himself a painting, looked at and analysed hundreds of years from now. El Abrazo de los Príncipes.

Lo Spasimo, Raphael, 1515-1517

“Are we allowed to kiss in front of Jesus on his way to crucifixion or is that tasteless? Because I really want to kiss you right now, Simon.”

Las Meninas, Diego Velázquez, 1656

“He made me look at Velázquez in the painting and how he was looking back at the viewer, at me. I still remember the exact tone of his voice, how he was so certain when he told me that I had every right to be where I am. That I am the subject of this painting, the king being painted. All those tyrants, King Felipe and Emmanuel and all those that came in between, they are trapped in that mirror forever while I am here, alive, we’re here. Velázquez is looking at two queer princes, ready to paint us.” (chapter 13)

Casa Alberto

“So, tell me more about this special part of Madrileñan history.” He was slightly teasing but mostly actually curious. 

Simon seemed all too eager to answer that question, and it hit Wilhelm how genuine Simon’s care for his city — his country — and its people was. It made him a little sad to know that a lot of people didn’t get to see that because they only focused on Simon being too gay or too Latino, or even just too carefree and enjoying life because he was young, to be their future king.

bonus content:

Iglesia de San Antonio de los Alemanes (where Simon goes to church)

“I think I need to go somewhere.”

“Oh?” Wilhelm said softly, “Right now?”

Simon hesitated before he nodded. “I need to- get some clarity? Or - I hope that I’ll get it there?” He whispered, voice shaky.

“Do you want to tell me where you’re going?”

“To- uh, to pray? I mean- to church? I don’t know if I’ll pray…” Simon’s voice was shaky, uncertainty shining in his eyes when he dared to look up at Wilhelm. (chapter 11)

#god i don’t think i have immerse myself into a fictional world so deeply before #this story lives and breathes #and i love what it has given me god to imagine when i read the first chapter i have not moved countries or gotten a cursed degree yet #he feels like a friend i held by the hand and walked through adventures together🥹 #i really went to a particular restaurant and ordered particular dishes because i read about it in a book #and it was as magical as i imagined heheh #(including the snails sksksk) #prince simon i love you forever #prince simon au #prescribing everyone a reread Right Now! #give me attention and i’ll come back with extra pics of the food sksk #simon’s depression church is not mentioned in Text but this is canon source hehe #i’m not the first person to visit pscu locations and i love everyone who’s done it what a great idea it was so fun! #yes i know you’re not supposed to take photos in the prado but then i remembered this was built by a colonial powerhouse then felt less bad

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

Lord of the Empty Isles

sci-fi/fantasy

set on a supposedly utopian planet recovering from a climate crisis, where bonds between people are able to be seen and manipulated (by some people)

follows a young man whose brother was cursed and killed by an infamous outlaw 5 years ago, and he’s finally able to curse him back - but it rebounds, as he’s somehow fatebound to the outlaw

to find a cure and save them both they have to team up, and he quickly finds out that the resources the outlaw is stealing go to the thousands of people neglected on prison planets, and he has to go against what he thought was right to help them

no romance, aroace MC, focus on platonic relationships

arc from netgalley, out june 6

#Lord of the Empty Isles #aroaessidhe 2024 reads #I enjoyed this quite a bit! But I think it could have gone a bit further in places. #It has some interesting concepts and a great cast of characters and yay no romance #I do have a lot of thoughts and little critiques... #it's p obvious where the plot is going and what's going to happen #There’s clearly a lot gone into developing this bond system but to be honest I still don’t entirely get it? #It seems to emphasise that the bonds just reflect connections between people rather than predetermine anything; but also the plot kind of #hinges on Remy and Idrian having a predetermined bond? There are a lot of explanations of intricacies but a lot of it didn’t sink in idk #It’s promoted as QP but to me it reads as a general platonic relationship. I generally expect a depiction of a QPR to have like.. #some form of acknowledgement/depiction of the form of their relationship being a particular (undefinable?) kind #with some specific level of commitment? I’m being picky maybe they mean queerplatonic themes/vibes rather than saying it’s a qpr #specifically. the centred platonic relationship is good! it doesn't seem like a qpr to me; at most what could one day be that #also things are solved quite quickly and easily in the end - both the curse and the downfall of the bad guy. #I feared it would go down the route of blaming things on the person in charge rather than emphasising systemic issues which it kinda does…. #It’s impossible to ignore right now just how deeply people are willing to believe dehumanising propaganda - and how 'telling the truth' #and exposing the person in power as bad doesn’t actually do anything so that happening here made me go…… oh okay. well. #there is room for a sequel that maybe will explore this tho. idk #complaints aside - I do recommend this! It was fun and pretty unique. #aroace books #no romance

[thisismeracing]

Since when did we start charging money on patreon for fanfics 😭😭😭😭 is this for real😭

hi, love. I haven't seen that many people doing the Patreon thing when it comes to fanfic, but it's pretty common for people who draw for example to set up a Patreon. I believe that everyone who does, just like myself, needs the money. I wouldn't be doing it if i didn't need to. I figured the Patreon setup was the best idea since it's not really that common for people to tip writers, we've been struggling with getting reblogs and comments, so you can imagine.

Right now, I'm applying and doing tests to get an internship, which still won't be enough because I'm also trying to apply for a master's. So, yeah, I'm really thankful for everyone who tipped me on ko-fi and subscribed to my Patreon, last month my savings were over, and the Patreon money was what helped me pay for some medical stuff I needed (Idk if you saw the whole mick schumacher's sick club, but yeah — huge thank you for everyone who subscribed/donated btw).

We often see fic writers as little robots who don't eat, drink, or sleep. We request stuff, and expect an instant reply, and when we get the content we don't even go back to the page to tell the writer our thoughts. We don't reblog, nor leave comments, but still, we expect them to keep writing and keep sharing everything as if it didn't take hours, sometimes days to come up with a 1k piece polished to what we think readers will like best. I hope I don't sound rude, I'm just trying to make a point because I'm tired of seeing writers deactivating, tired of seeing my friends getting writer's block and then people still demanding things.

On top of that, I'm still posting a lot here, from smau to blubs and long fic requests (and I won't even talk about how some pieces aren't even getting a hundred notes, which always makes me wonder if I'm doing something wrong, if my writing is bad, or if there's anything that I could do to make the reader's experience more enjoyable), and it takes a lot of time, it's even harder to balance the two profiles now, but still, I keep sharing some of my work for free. so please, please, don't make me feel bad about needing money. thanks ❤️.

#I'm still searching like crazy for the best internship that gives me enough time to study for my application and enough money to pay for + #the stuff that I really need #medical bills are expensive #school books and stuff are expensive #we do what we can #and I say we including other writers that relly on donations too #anyways #Im sorry for letting my heart run wild here but I really needed to share this because I'm tired #and I do feel a bit guilty some days for sharing paid stuff because I wanted everyone to read what I post #wanted everyone to enjoy it and gush with me about college!mick and ghost!lewis and so on #but right now that's the best way I found to deal with my current situation #so please please try seeing your writers side #and on top of that make sure youre supporting the people that are here everyday putting their hearts on each piece #and I mean support as in reblog and let them know you liked it and so on #if you can support someone with money thats great #but most of the times a comment and a reblog will make the writers days #it makes mine #I wish you guys could see the smile on my face whenever someone comes back like “hey Im the one who requested x and I loved it” #anyways Im sorry for ranting #I hope I did not come across as rude again #and Im not saying you don't reblog or support your writers this is more of a widely rant #<3 #millies inbox #anon #patreon #f1 fandom

[jelly-o630]

Spoilers for Terry Pratchett’s Small Gods

I’m about 3/4s of of the way through Small Gods en and I’m at the part where library is burning down and everyone’s trying to escape to Ankh-Morpork and in my head I was thinking ‘okey so they managed to save hundreds of scrolls using Brutha’s perfect memory and every character we care about is escaping to live in a safe city where Om can maybe become a big god again- okey I can see how this book is going to end, kinda bittersweet with the burning of Ephebe but the characters we like are free and there’ll probably be more wisdom about the nature of religion in this last quarter of the book which may very well be a slow ending about the characters we like having a happy ending’ BUT THEN they start taking about putting Vorbis on god damn TRIAL for what’s he’s done and Brutha being 100% precent for it and I’m just here like HoLy sHiT he’s actually gonna do it HOLY SHIT TERRY PRATCHETT IS GONNA HAVE HIS RELIGIOUS LEADER CHARACTER LOOK HIS ACTIONS IN THE GODDAMN EYE AND MAYBE NOT REALIZE WHAT HE’S DONE BUT HAVE MOST EVERYONE ELSE IN OMNIA REALIZE AND THEY WILL FINALLY BE FREE OF THE FAKE SURENESS AND FEAR OF THEIR LIVES VORBIS WILL FACE ACTUAL REAL CONSEQUENCES FOR HIS ACTIONS OH MY GOD OH MY GOD TERYY I UNDERSTAND WHY THEY KNIGHTED YOU

#small gods #when there was a quarter left of the book I was like uhhh wait a minute why does it feel like it’s ending #then Simony starts talking about a trial and I was LIKE HOLY SHIT #Everyone needs to read this book #good omens fans pick up a Terry Pratchett book RIGHT NOW #I already got someone from work interest in reading it when I’m done #I want to give this away tbh #it feels wrong to keep such perfection in just my own possession #Terry Pratchett #great god om #discworld #the turtle moves #haven’t read a book with this much excellent religious commentary since the screwtape letters

[fictionadventurer]

All the tour groups in Springfield should be very proud of me for how well I refrained from sharing all my fascinating Lincoln facts.

#there were so many school groups! #a giant one came in RIGHT AFTER i entered lincoln's cabinet room #part of me was screaming 'children i NEED to tell you about all these idiots and their insane drama!' #a smarter part of me understood that would be super weird #so instead i regaled different individuals of my own traveling party after we had the room to ourselves #then at lincoln's tomb we lucked out in getting there during the ten minutes of the day when school groups weren't there #which meant we got a personal tour from a guide who seemed thrilled to have grown-ups to talk to #he and my dad chatted about fishing for a long while in the entry #it didn't feel disrespectful because it totally felt like the kind of conversation lincoln would have understood and joined in on #and then we went on our way but the guide then chased us down to share all the fascinating lincoln stories as we went along #(shout-out to lefty you were great) #and then a school group found us so we made a graceful exit #but outside a teacher was explaining to a different group about how robert was significant in his own right so he's buried at arlington #and the RESTRAINT i showed in not immediately informing them that he was present at three presidential assassinations! it was rather heroic #and then when we toured lincoln's house the guide (who accidentally made it clear he was a revolutionary war buff) #(which made it a bit hilarious he was stuck with lincoln) #asked for questions before we started and someone asked about lincoln's 1860 election campaign! #aka one of my SPECIAL NICHE AREAS OF OBSESSION! #you cannot imagine how desperately i wanted to tell him ALL ABOUT seward and thurlow weed #anyway it was fun to go back now that i actually know stuff about lincoln #but it was also a bit frustrating because now i know how much they leave out #(though there was cool new info and artifacts) #(the blood-stained piece of laura keene's dress was very morbid and very cool) #also it reminded me that i still have that book on the 1860 election i've yet to read and the hype is so real #presidential talk

[justalittlebluetiefling]

Since I first read these books, I've actually become pretty obsessed with characters who are super blinded by their view of morality to the point where it hurts people they care about but eventually learn that perhaps things don't have to be so cut and dry, which I think means that I'll be a lot more obsessed with Galad this time around.

#'galad is so good he'd make you tear your hair out #he'd hurt a person because he had to serve a greater good #he wouldn't even notice who was hurt because he'd be so intent on the other but if he did he would expect them to understand and think it #was all well and right' #like seriously that is my WEAKNESS right there #erin rereads wot #wheel of time #the great hunt #wot book spoilers #should i be working right now? perhaps #am i going to stop reading to work? also perhaps

[rapha-reads]

I just finished The City We Became by NK Jemisin and I already want to dive into book 2, The World We Make, so, so bad, because, shit, living cities, intertextuality, myths passed down in history, Lovecraftian monsters, queer and poc main characters, vibrant language, modern, rhythmic style? Totally my jam, yeah, that's what I live and breathe for, and I need the next story now. But also it's close to 6am and sure, it's Sunday, and sure, I'm super jobless and only thing on my agenda is finding a goddamn job, but just because my life has less direction than a car without a wheel, doesn't mean that I should encourage my self-destructive tendencies by jumping into another 400 pages book right now... Right? Right? Just a chapter. Just a chapter and I'll go to bed... One chapter. (every bookworm around the world, laughing at me: yeah, sure, sister. One chapter. We believe you. Have fun not sleeping.)

#the city we became #the world we make #nk jemisin #the great cities trilogy #books #science fiction #fantasy #scifi fantasy #literature #rapha reads #rapha talks #bookworm problems #if someone finds me a job in the next five business days i swear i will put my life in order and starts sleeping at night #right now i'm full on nocturnal and it's starting to be a problem but at the very least i have time to read and discover gems like this one #definitely another excellent find this year is starting under excellent literary auspices

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

Tell me more about this book blanket? I'm Fascinated

Omg yay!! Okay so I'm knitting two rows per book that I finish in 2024, and each book rows will be a different color based on the genre it is

So here are the books I've read so far. Everything that's in bold is what I've knitted, and the last book on the list is what I'm currently reading but haven't finished yet. So I've knitted everything before Fifty Feet Down, and read everything up to Annie on My Mind, but I'm currently like thirty percent through it.

I'm choosing colors as I finish genres, and I'm trying to do it only with yarn I have (cuz yarn is expensive and I have a lot of yarn. The reason I have a lot of yarn suitable for a blanket is because I took all of this yarn from a blanket I started knitting four years ago and never finished. Like I finished frogging that blanket yesterday and made it into cakes on my new yarn winder!!) I didn't really try to make the colors fit the genres. I just own a lot of navy yarn and knew I'd read a lot of LGBTQ books, and I own a lot of black and know I'll read a lot of horror books. Then for dystopian I just chose a yarn color that I had available, same with mystery.

Here's how it's going so far! You can see the four navy rows for the two LGBTQ books i read, the two purple for the one dystopian book (which is also very good, I highly recommend Debate Kids at the End of the World and that author in general, Alex Nonymous) and then a chunk of black because I read four I. S. Belle books in a row (you can also see all of the ends I didn't weave in, which I'm going to hate myself for when I finish the blanket)

"But Austyn, what if the book is more than one genre?" I'm so glad you asked! Most of these books could be considered more than one genre. Fifty Feet Down is a mystery, but also a romance. So I just consider what genre I believe is more integral to the story, if that makes sense. Fifty Feet Down could be relatively the same if the main characters were just friends, but the story would be vastly different if it wasn't a mystery. Therefore, it gets the mystery color instead of romance. Same with all of the I. S. Belle books. There's romance in them, but if you took out the romance it would still be pretty similar, but if you took out the horror it would be an incredibly different story.

So that's my 2024 book blanket!

#im so excited about this #its so fun #i read on the subway. at work. before bed. in the morning after waking up #i get so excited to knit new rows #and buy new books #buying new books is like a little gift for me #i put my entire tbr on an online spinny wheel so if i dont know what i want to read next i can spin the wheel and itll tell me #but sometimes im craving a specific book and ill just read that next #right now i have classics such as: stone butch blues. the perks of being a wallflower. playground. manhunt. #the second ari and dante book that ive been meaning to read for months #because i pre ordered that book and ive owned it since the day it came out. and this summer i reread the first one #so that i would know whats going on in the second one. but i haven't read the second one yet #i have a long ass tbr and i swear every day i add more #but i have a whole lifetime. and a whole year. to read them. #im gonna go knit the rows for fifty feet down now (an incredible book) and then probs read some more annie on my mind #have a great night everyone!!

[woahjo]

calllll, can i get some recommendations for your fav women authors? i’m okay w anything <33

YESSSS OF COURSE!!!!

so my number one favorite author right now is mieko kawakami. she primarily writes contemporary feminist fiction about women in their 30s and 40s. i know i've spoken about her a lot, but she writes beautifully about the experience of being a "non-conventional" woman within a patriarchal society. and she writes about loneliness so perfectly. god she's wonderful.

book recs by her: - heaven, this novel is actually outside of what i think she's most recognized for since the characters are younger, but it's a book about two bullied teenagers and the way they make sense of why it happens to them. a lot of it is an exploration of philosophy through fiction and it has one of the most frustrating (in a good way) scenes that i've read. just so so good - breasts and eggs, a book about a woman who wants to have a child without a husband, without marrying, and without a man involved. explores motherhood, families, sexuality, womanhood, and the ethics of having children with a surrogate father who is not involved in the child's life. asks a lot of questions of what it means to be a woman. also worth noting that in japan it is illegal for a single woman to do IVF (and a same-sex couple) and the book explores that. it's DELIGHTFULLY human. i love this book.

another one of my fav authors is octavia butler. she's a science fiction novelist and she often includes allegories about social and racial injustice, capitalism, and colonialism. i even feel like allegory isn't the right word because a lot of it is very in your face. she's a brilliant writer and her work is SO relevant to today's social climate (especially her earthseed duology). her work really draws you into the world that she builds, almost to the point that the taboos she includes no longer feel like taboos by the time you put the book down.

book recs by her (they're series): - lilith's brood / xenogenesis, this is a trilogy and im not joking when i say that it's probably the best series of books i've read. it's about humanity and the aliens that come to "rescue" them on the verge of extinction, humans having practically wiped themselves out with nuclear war. it's really difficult to describe the book any further without feeling like i'm spoiling it, but the novel is an allegory for colonialism and the idea of cultural identity. it's incredible. i was asked to read the first seven chapters for a class and then i finished the whole series in three days. i could not put it down. it's fantastic and by the end of it, you're so drawn into this world she's created that the things that once felt incredibly taboo become so normal. it's fantastic i cannot say enough good things about this series. (the first book is called dawn) - parable of the sower, this one is from a duology, but i'm gonna talk about the first one because i haven't finished the second. it's about a post-capitalism america. it's set in california in 2024, when the american government, currency, and systems have all but collapsed in everything but name. it's absolutely HARROWING the parallels this book has to the current state of america, despite being written in 1993. honestly, she told the future a little bit and it's really frightening. it's told through the eyes of a teenage girl as she starts the religion "earthseed" in an attempt to make sense of the world. the book is absolutely phenomenal. so so so so good.

#cal care package #these are my two favorite authors right now #i love them #mieko kawakami actually recently published a new book called sisters in yellow that will be translated into english in 2025 #i read the translations of mieko kawakami's work by david boyd and i thought they were great #anyway please let me know if you read any of these #i love them so much

[rohirric-hunter]

THERE'S A LOTR DAILY AKIN TO DRACULA DAILY?!? LINK???

There is! It's being organized by @sindar-princeling and you can subscribe here! There aren't public archives online due to LotR still being under copyright, but I believe that after you subscribe you'll get an email with all the daily readings so far. Or you can catch up yourself: today's entry was the Nazgûl assault on the Prancing Pony and the following day, up to the first night the hobbits and Aragorn spend in the woods outside of Bree.

#lotr #lotr daily #its a great deal of fun! #right now its just broken up readings of the story in general but i am very excited for ttt and rotk #because the frodo&sam bits and the everyone else bits are not told in chronological order per se in the book as published #so that will be extra interesting

[cam-ulu29]

now I’ve only read one book okay but teeny tiny question is it really gonna take FIFTEEN BOOKS to say “Rand al’Thor turned bad but he redeemed himself in the end”?????? And if he’s the dragon reborn already what the fuck is Logian for, window dressing??

#don’t tell me I’m going to take the time to read all these books for a really simple story like that #but also how could it be any other way #I hate Robert Jordan right now #wheel of time #the eye of the world #the great hunt #NO SPOILERS #I’ll murder you electronically #but also wtf #robert jordan