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#ace talks

Girl I work with: Why’d you cut all your hair off?

Me, a closeted Gay who doesn’t want to tell her it’s because I saw fanart of Princess Peach with short hair and fell so in love that I immediately had to copy her: I,,, ruined it with bleach??

Girl I work with, nodding sympathetically: I’ve been there, girl

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You know those blogs that are like super cool and chill who answer asks with this authority that’s actually really awesome and their vibe is like that one character in every movie with The Brain Cell that probably smokes pot and then there’s fucking me,,,, who hasn’t known chill for a decade

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My mom: *buys me a snack I mentioned I was craving one time, orders me a cute notebook, takes me to lunch, gives me money for clothes*

Me: Why are you spending so much money on my lately?

Mom: Well I realized I haven’t been paying as much attention to you as your siblings, and I wanted to make up for it

Me, who was too busy fucking off with my own stuff to notice: Ah

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You all know the running joke “gay people can’t drive”?
Well like all the things in the LGBTQ+ community is a generalization.
You like men? u can’t drive or park
Yuo like women? you can drive and park
You like both or none? you either can drive or park, not both
I can drive but the corners of my cad can teel u i can’t park, don’ even me start on going in retro!

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I need to write an outline but I literally have no clue how and my brain only works in detailed templates and I can’t find anyyyy

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The most bizarre and random AU’s are my favorite. Like “au where all the characters work at a zoo together”, what made you think of that? I love it, incredible, amazing. Or like “au where they all work at the same hotel” that’s the shit. Pure, so good

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image

i seriously can’t believe you all like this blog so much- it literally is killing me that you all 300 of you enjoy my stupid content. i am going to do an event soon but i do want to work on my other blogs. which two are really close to hitting 100 followers so i want to do something special for those

thank you all 

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Disclaimer: I’m not native English speaker and dyslexic so I relay on the word autocorrect a lot and im not an expert of anything, i just know things or think i do it.

I’m in a poly platonic asexual relationship with a Ravenclaw and a Hufflepuff. I’m a Slytherin, can I make it any more obvious?
Regardless our prefer gender pronouns we all have a uterus and our periods are mostly one after another.
It was Ravenclaw wife time when this happened.

So biology 101 with me and my sworn enemies: the hormones
Brain: are u having a baby this month?
Uterus: nope :(
Brain: okay I’ll send the cleaning squad
The cleaning squad are obviously hormones that make the uterus contract so it shed the old blood. Your muscles are contracting so that’s why it hurts.
For non-uterus user, or if u have one but u don’t know, its the same hormones that start the contraction when someone is in labour.
Luckily we can produce happy hormones that can relax muscles. Can u guess when the brain start making them?
When you are horny. Masturbating is very good for sore muscle.


If only we experience sexual attraction *ironic sigh*


Asexuality apart, our hormones are still there. My libido is still there somewhere, don’t really care about it.
So when I’m on my period I found it help like reading NSFW fanfiction or scrolling the dark side of fan art.  Literally just that, no other naughty business. I don’t know why that tricks my brain to produce horny hormones but it does and works well with pain management so ill not investigate more.
Knowing this and that Ravenclaw wife is more sex-positive i asked them if they wanted naughty fanfiction or something on the common chat, they replied that the would like ff with pictures, maybe a yaoi manga ore some omegaverse.
And here the Accident.
Hufflepuff wife, the sex-neutral to sex-repulsed wife, asked us what is an omegaverse.
If u don’t know what an omegaverse is we will not tell you like we didn’t tell her. The question was just too sweet and pure that we wouldn’t ruin it and she’s not curious enough to google it as i did a long time ago.
If u really don’t know about it it’s not really that bad, but it’s my least favourite kind of au. it just goes against what I want in an alternative universe.

And for today AceTalk is all
Reed u soon

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You can tell i’m bored coz im doing this.
For a long time i tought about dooing this, sharing my day to day life as an asexual human begin coz i sometime think that the others don’t get how many different aces are out there.
Follow me trying understend the world as an emotional costipate, touch adverse, sex neutral ace an my battle against my sworn enemies: the hormons. 

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Being an essential worker is forcing a laugh and nodding along when a grown man tells you your facemask makes you look less friendly.

Being an essential worker is holding back the panic attack when a customer thinks it’s funny to fake cough in your face.

Being an essential worker is keeping hand sanitizer in your pocket and putting it on after every encounter, even when the smell makes you nauseous.

Being an essential worker is being terrified to go home to your family after a day of interacting with possible carriers.

Being an essential worker is terrifying, and exhausting, and frustrating.

Being an essential worker doesn’t make me a hero, it makes me a victim to a capitalist society that won’t allow me to stay home and safe without starving.

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Just a tiny update

Currently as it stands with the virus and what not

It’s a very bad time to be laid off/fired/unemployed. Here’s why, recently I was laid off due to the loss of contracts for ISSA/MSSA/IATS I loved my job and loved working with my boss. The experience was truly unbelievable and my old boss was a very nice man.

Unfortunately things happen, things change and life continues to go on, the earth is still rotating, the earth is still going around the sun.

There will be better opportunities, if one door closes another will open.

It hurts to loose a job, trust me I know, but things will get better. Things will improve. In the words of Morpheus “all you need to do is believe”

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There was a girl in my English class who, when something hilarious would happen, would smile and chuckle a little while all of us were rolling on the floor laughing. But show her a Sparknotes meme and she would have tears streaming down her face from laughter.

I miss her

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Anyone got any lgbtq+ movies/tv shows (preferably not sad and where the entire plot doesn’t center around them being queer)? Feeling sad, frustrated, and unrepresented rn :(

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