Aziraphale is the most character ever. He ran out of ideas so he declared war on hell. He canonically says fuck. His favourite colour is yellow. He’s literally an angel and can speak every language on earth but still isn’t fluent in french. He told his boyfriend to shoot him for his magic act and made him go through with it when their miracles weren’t working. He gave away his flaming sword and then lied about it for the next 6000 years. He has a bookshop that never sells books. No one’s doing it like him.
"Instead of negotiating with us, Netflix decided to open an overpriced restaurant. Here's what we did in front of it. Starring the incomparable Adam Lustick, with concept and props by WGA writer Shawn Wines."
im doing a very quick (aka skimming-a-lot) GO reread and i'd forgotten how much i love discorporated aziraphale. he is 3000% done. he has no fucks left to give. this part of the book is just him and crowley, independently of each other, having hit rock bottom and come through despair and out on the other side into "fuck it we ball" and it's wonderful. they're so in sync and so unhinged.
favourite discorporated az moments:
telling mr shadwell he's the southern pansy
gets so annoyed with the televangelist he tells him that heaven only has a 50% chance of winning and the rest is propaganda, after denying it for the whole book
"you lot [humanity] are all going to be civilian casualties either way"
telling mrs ormerod that he knows he's in england because nobody else could have asked such a fucking stupid question
world's least sincere "wasn't that touching."
'the exorcist' reference *
extremely eager to murder adam young
i cannot emphasise enough how down with child murder he is **
tells madame tracy they need to be doing 70mph and then makes her fucking vespa warp through space at 200mph
"i'm the nice one. you can't expect me to—oh, blast it. you try to do the decent thing, and where does it get you?" aziraphale snapped his fingers.
* im willing to bet money that was crowley's idea and ended with him feeling vaguely queasy while aziraphale sat next to him going "what absolute nonsense, this isn't how it works at all"
“the worst they could do is kill you” actually the worst they could do is crawl closer to you instead of leaving even though they’re currently bleeding out after cutting their own foot off with a hacksaw in order to escape and the door is open for the first time since you both woke up in this room, just to pull you away from beating the now lifeless body of the man who was about to kill them and proceed to cup your face with the sort of tenderness that wasn’t meant for someone like you, wasn’t meant for either of you not here not now, before saying things that you both so desperately want to believe but know deep down are near impossible all while you feel the searing ache of the bullet wound they put there not moments earlier and then, even as they start to make their way towards the door, even as their shirt slips out of your grasp and your scrabbling fingers can no longer reach their wrist and the chain around your ankle starts to feel like your fate, they still turn back to assure you that they wouldn’t lie to you. if you’re adam saw 2004
Thinking about boys who get sluttier when they're intoxicated. When you refuse their advances at first they whine "Awww, you're no funnnn 🥺🥺🥺" and spread their legs apart while leaning back on the couch, shifting his hips just enough that it draws attention to the bulge in his pants.
thought of the day: the way that everyone forgets noah and yet will be forever influenced by his presence in their lives is kinda appropriate for TRC as a coming of age story. do any of us truly, consciously know each person, event, or place that shaped us into the people we are today? though our consciousness forgets, their memory is inseparable from the way we go about life.