#after so much fluff i'm more than overdue for some angst | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ichorai · 3 years

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pearls and pastries ; j.jk

pairing ; pirate!jungkook x baker!reader (gender-neutral)

summary ; a crew of pirates have been pilfering your village for several weeks now and one particularly keen buccaneer has stopped by your bakery practically every visit; whether it be for the delectable pastries or for the sweet baker he's taken an interest to, jungkook couldn’t say. but there’s a catch - the baker doesn’t know that he’s a pirate.

themes ; fantasy, angst, fluff, pining, slight action, pirate au, baker au, medieval au

words ; 3.6k

warnings / includes ; descriptions of weaponry, stealing (from the rich), jungkook being a sad lovesick sap, pirate!bts, poetic sadness but when do i not do angst lmfao everything i touch turns into written sorrow </3

a/n ; written for the @ficscafe fic exchange event for @sunshinerainbowsbts !! i hope you like it <3 i'm definitely considering writing a part two to this :D

Jungkook wasn’t quite fond of parrots. Well, his mislike wasn’t necessarily directed towards the multi-hued rotund bird itself, but the fact that the wretched thing was squawking out a poor rendition of what Jungkook had announced earlier whilst clambering down the crow’s nest.

“I’m going to the bakery! I’m going to the bakery! I’m going to the bakery!” the winged devil screeched from atop Jimin’s shoulder, ruffling its bright feathers as if taunting him.

Shooting it the nastiest of scowls, Jungkook reached behind his head to untie the vermilion bandana holding his overgrown locks away from his narrowed eyes. “You better shut that bird up before I toss it to the sharks, Jimin.”

“If I let you do that, I’d also have to throw you overboard. The both of you are equally annoying,” the other pirate snorted in contempt, glancing up at his younger friend striding across the ship before moving his gaze back to the knapsack he was emptying for the pilfer. Out fell several empty bottles of rum, a few gold pieces glinting in the harsh midday sun, two jewel-encrusted daggers, and a worn eyepatch that suspiciously looked to be the same as the one Yoongi always wore over his left eye. “You seem to forget that we’re here to steal from the rich, not buy fancy breads! You’re lucky that Namjoon has half the decency not to kick you off the boat. Jin, however fond he is of you, still calls you a moocher.”

Rouge faintly dusted across Jungkook’s cheekbones as he coughed into his fist, lifting his shoulder in a half-shrug. “I steal stuff sometimes,” he muttered under his breath. It was useless to defend himself against someone who saw straight through him.

“Sometimes, my foot!” Jimin scoffed, hiking the bag over his shoulders. “Bringing back a goblet you found rolling down the street doesn’t count, you know that, right?”

Jungkook rolled his eyes to the cloudless sky, far too stubborn to admit that Jimin was right. With not another word, the young pirate clambered off of the large vessel and onto the rickety docks, grunting upon landing. It didn’t bother him much that Jimin was irked at his lack of contribution. They were rich enough as it is; what was the rush?

The air was tangy with sea salt and damp wood as he inhaled a deep breath, setting off for your bakery. Walking there took exactly three hundred and seventy two steps. Jungkook had memorized the shortest route to your little shop, mumbling the numbers under his breath with a growing grin blossoming across his lips. He subconsciously rolled the sleeves of his white tunic down, the fabric concealing the pirate tattoos inked all over his arms.

When the youthful sea wolf stepped foot into your store, a familiar chiming of the bell hooked atop the door echoed across the cream-walled room. At the reverberating sound, your head peeked out from the kitchen situated in the back. An illuminating beam danced on your features, eyes lighting up with mirth at the sight of Jungkook.

It made the muscle within his chest slam against his ribcage, desperate to be freed from its confines because it belonged to you, and only you. He wasn’t quite sure when the sudden fixation for the village baker his crew was stealing from started, but he had acclimated to his own change of heart by visiting you as often as he could.

“Fancy seeing you here today. Are you coming in or are you now my human door stopper?” Your heavenly voice floated towards Jungkook, snapping him out of his thoughts. Sheepish, he shuffled inside, engulfed by the warm scents of chocolate cakes, powdered pastries, caramelized fruits, and toasted almonds. His stomach gave an impatient snarl at the sight of tempting desserts. You had also walked to the front of the counter, dusting your flour covered hands on an apron. Some of the white powder had managed to smudge on your cheek, and Jungkook had to resist the urge to reach over and thumb it away.

“Hi,” he said with the brightest of grins. “I’ve missed you.”

At his bold statement, you suppressed a chortle. “I think you missed those chocolate cream puffs you like so much, not me. What’ve you been up to while you were gone?”

Jungkook hesitated at that. For the short amount of time he’d been visiting you, not once had he mustered the courage to tell you of his true origins. A savage pirate like him shouldn’t even be around the likes of you. You had no idea that he was part of the crew that was robbing your village, and the very thought of you finding out had him terrified. You were a taste of all the goodness in the world, and Jungkook was afraid you’d crumble into ash if he dared touch you. The sinner had no rights touching an angel, after all.

“Visiting family,” he hummed, quick to move on. If you noticed his strange demeanor, you didn’t say anything. For that, Jungkook was grateful. “I brought something for you.”

There was something about your smile that seemed to expel any and all feelings of gloom in a room. Jungkook was no exception to this feat, his knees almost buckling against the soft pink counters. He righted himself by leaning his elbows on top and propping his chin up with a palm. Gods, he didn’t know he was in this deep.

“Oh?” you set your hands on your hips, tilting your head to the side. “To what do I owe such pleasures?”

The corners of his eyes crinkled. “For those cream cheese tarts you made me last time I visited. Thought I’d repay you.” Whilst saying this, he used his free hand to reach into his back pocket, fishing out a string of authentic pearls, adorned with a glimmering clasp of gold the same hue as the sun.

Your smile melted into a confused pucker, brows knitting together in a muted painting of hesitance, yet you ogled the expensive necklace dangling by one of his spindly fingers nonetheless. Where on earth had he gotten such a valuable treasure? “But you already paid me with money. I really can’t take that, Jungkook.”

Disappointment was easily detected as he slanted his lips to the side. “Alright, then.” He tucked the pearls back into his pocket. It surprised you how easily he had complied.

The worrisome atmosphere was quick to dissolve when the bell jangled once more. A small child meandered in with a toothy beam, holding a small pouch of clattering coins in their palm. They were no taller than Jungkook’s midriff, and he liked it a little more than he should have watching a certain softness adorn your features at the sight of the kid.

“I recommend the cinnamon apple pie. Or maybe the brown sugar crepes if you’re looking for something sweeter,” Jungkook said, gesturing to the treat behind the display glass. The child angled their head to stare at the taller man with wonder. “Anything Y/N makes is to die for, though.”

The child excitedly babbled something in return, but you didn’t quite pick up what they had said. You were far too focused on Jungkook’s animated features when he kneeled down to point at some more desserts. Sure, he was a handsome man, you’ve known that since day one. You’ve never really looked at him in this light. It was as if he were carved from pure luminosity, whittled by the hand of the most skilled sculptor. Everything about him was practically perfect; the gentle slope of his nose, the angles of his raised eyebrows, the dappled rouge of his lips, the beauty marks mottling his dewy skin, the dangerous cuts of his jaw, the twinkle of gaiety you found in his irises. With the sunlight filtering through the windows, it basked Jungkook within a golden radiance, the shadows casted along his face only highlighting his best features, doing nothing to aid your fluttering pulse. Has he always been this beautiful?

“I’ll have a slice of apple pie!”

The sudden clinking of coins being dumped onto the counter snapped you out of your trance, and you kindly wrapped up what the child ordered and handed them the paper bag. Both you and Jungkook watched as they smiled in thanks and trotted out of the bakery. Curse his handsome physique.

A little flustered by your earlier thoughts, you busied your hands by sorting the coins the kid had coughed up. Jungkook, ever the kind soul, merely stood with you as you worked, engaging you in entertaining conversations to keep you occupied while your store was empty. Where did the sun go once it disappeared down the horizon? Why did everybody else seem to enjoy the bitter taste of coffee except him? Why did his heart beat so quickly when around you? The last question he couldn’t muster the courage to ask, and much to his perturbation, he already knew the answer. You enjoyed Jungkook’s company very much; to the point where you couldn’t quite remember what it was like before he had sauntered into your life.

Before the both of you knew it, the sun was already setting. Jungkook noticed the way you deflated just slightly when red kissed the sky. It was a telltale sign that Jungkook was long overdue to go back to his ship. Yoongi would have his ass if he was late again. The whole situation was ridiculous, really. He felt like a fairy tale princess running away from the ball before his clothes grew into tatters. Well, in his case, he supposed it’d be pirate-wear.

Your smile betrayed only the gentlest hint of disappointment as you thrusted a bag of warm cookies into his arms. “Take this for the road,” you had said.

And so Jungkook did, smiling like an idiot the whole way back. A part of him absentmindedly wondered what your face would look like when you noticed that he had left the pearls on the countertop for you.

The ship rocked as the young pirate scampered across the deck at a startling speed, flinging the doors to the cabins open. Six older pirates stared at his panting form, a few looking on with unsurprised indifference, most glaring at him in disappointment. Jimin merely stuck his tongue out, his childish way of saying I told you so. There was expectancy in the captain’s eyes, but it waned away at an instant upon seeing that Jungkook carried nothing of value. Namjoon pinched the space between his brows in mild frustration.

Stiffly, Jungkook jerked his arm to thrust the bag in his hand forward. “Cookie?” he asked. Nobody said anything. Jungkook slowly brought his appendage back down, guilt roiling in his abdomen. “I take it you guys don’t want the cookies?”

With a huff, Namjoon stalked forward. “Of course we want the cookies, give me that.” He snatched the bag out of Jungkook’s hands and tossed it to Taehyung, who caught it with eagerness vividly splayed across his ruffled features. “I do have to admit, we’re getting tired of you bringing back nothing but sweets every time we go on raids, Jungkook. C’mon, kid, this is a team effort here. Look, just today Yoongi managed to steal a dozen coffers from a nobleman. The least you can do is try.” True to the captain’s word, there was a mountain of chests and boxes full to the brim with gold coins and shimmering jewels piled to the side of the cabin.

Swallowing down the lump in his throat, Jungkook nodded in understanding, though not without a miniscule frown twinging his lips. What was a pirate without his treasure, right?

Taking note of his glum demeanor, Namjoon clapped a hand to the younger man’s shoulder. “We’re not mad at you—”

Yoongi snorted at that.

“We just… want to help you help us,” Namjoon finished, ignoring the salty pirate’s quip from behind him.

The youngest man on deck raised his hand to his forehead in an awkward salute. “Yes cap’n!” Shame prowled within his chest; just thinking about the dishonor he brought to the pirate reputation by loitering in a bakery all day, ogling at sugary treats (and the sweet baker, but Jungkook digresses).

A part of him felt even worse knowing that he’d see you less and less, what with the other pirates breathing down his neck. He could only hope that you��d still look forward to his visits, though few and far in between.

Authentic bottles of expensive wines were shoved into his knapsack by Taehyung, lacing chains of aureate crammed into his hands by Hoseok, bars of cold silver wedged into the pits of his arms by Jimin, and more treasures thrown at the youngest pirate to hold as they lithely ran across the village. Being one of the stronger and more agile ones of the group had its downfalls, after all. He was being treated like a pack mule, hauling all the treasure for them. Not that he was going to complain; Jungkook knew that he deserved the rough-housing.

“Hold onto these for me, will you?” Yoongi gruffly uttered as he slid the thick hilts of gem-encrusted daggers into his belt. Jungkook complied hesitantly, but not without a suppressed groan of annoyance. “They’ll sell for more than a pretty penny, so don’t lose them.” The older pirate seemed to be in a grumpier than usual mood, considering he lost his eyepatch and the mottled scar crossing over his eye was on display for anybody to gawk at. It would’ve been worrying to Jungkook if he wasn’t aware of the fact that Jimin was merely prolonging his juvenile game of ‘keep away’, attempting to dance away from Yoongi’s inevitable wrath.

Perhaps being a pirate wasn’t his true calling, because Jungkook found that his mind kept wandering off to the matters at hand—running away from the guards. Though it was a relatively easy task (the guards were quite thick-headed in this village), he thought about the pretty plants dangling from the balconies of a building they jogged by, or the scents of exotic spices carried by the souq market not far from where they were. Most of all, much to his expectancy, his thoughts were centered around you. Had you gotten many customers for lunch rush? Were you lonely without him? How many times have you smiled today? Jungkook was all too fond of your smile.

Blinded by his unsaid affectionate ramblings, he only barely caught on to Namjoon’s quiet, “We shook the guards off for now. Be careful next time, Seokjin. The sun’s about to set soon; we should head back to the ship before it gets dark.”

Jungkook hissed out a small sigh of relief, bending over to catch his breath. Jogging across the village would have been no problem, but running with treasures twice his weight draped all over him was a different story.

When he righted himself back to standing, the sudden pit of shocked trepidation unfurled within his abdomen. There you were, beautiful as ever, but a terrifying sight to see. Normally you’d be the only person he would want to see, but as of this moment, you were the absolute last person he fancied bumping into.

Why now? He had the most rotten of luck.

Today you weren’t wearing your regular apron, but a pair of fitted grey trousers and a soft beige blouse far too large for you, hanging off of one of your shoulders as you cradled a basket of breads and cheeses and other groceries in your arms. It was a simple outfit, but one that made his heart clench nonetheless. The glinting of iridescent pearls draped over your décolletage had his breath stolen away from him as raw sentiment overtook his form. You were wearing the pearls he left for you and you never looked more beautiful. Jungkook, on the other hand, was clad in clothes that practically screamed pirate; a golden-clasped corset tightened about the small of his waist, a tattered white button-up tucked into his dark trousers, worn sea boots covering his feet. A large gun was also slung over the belt cinched around his hips, along with multiple daggers of the like, and not to mention all the riches and jewelry the other boys had thrown at him.

You couldn’t see him. No, it would absolutely ruin Jungkook.

Perhaps dropping everything he was holding in a panicked effort to dash away as quickly as he could was the worst possible thing he could have done to not warrant any attention.

The concerned and confused questions erupting from the other pirates as they whipped their heads towards their youngest comrade went completely ignored. He scampered away from them, lunging towards a shadowed alley and hiding behind a teetering pile of musty boxes. A stray cat nuzzled against his leg, but Jungkook merely shooed it away with a frustrated glare and not-so-subtle shushing gestures.

What a fool I am, the young buccaneer berated himself, pressing a knuckle against his temple in frustration. He waited for another minute, before slinking out from the shadows, peering around the corner to see if you were still there.

No sign of you. Relief seized his chest, but not without the gentlest flower of disappointment staining whatever solace he felt, a weed amongst the roses. Jungkook’s mind was still reeling from the fact that you were wearing his pearls.

Treading carefully, he strode out of the alley, turning the other direction before halting in his tracks completely. A queer, garbled noise tumbled past his lips.

It was you, a confused smile gracing your features, and all Jungkook could think about was how the sunlight was made for you, how you glowed in front of him, how he wanted to cradle you into his chest and murmur confessions of his pure, unadulterated love into your ear. But Jungkook didn’t do any of that. Instead, he merely stood there, as if he was imitating a statue in all of his pirate glory. Terrified, regretful, and ever so angry at himself.

Fate was a cruel game.

The pearls shone prettily on your skin. A reminder of the best mistake he’s ever made.

Your eyes had yet to wander down to fully take in his appearance, for your expression still held fondness for the man that’s visited your bakery so often, still having no idea that he was a filthy pirate, locked into his molten gaze. “I think you dropped something…?” The golden chains dangled loose between your fingers as you held them out to him. Jungkook didn’t take them, frozen on the spot.

It was as if he could pinpoint the exact moment you found out his true origins. Your brows furrowed upon seeing the weaponry strapped onto him, one of his pirate tattoos on display (Jungkook cursed himself for not thinking of rolling his sleeve back down), and the six other men watching in silent despondency behind them. You had always been a sharp one, far too smart for your own good.

Or, perhaps, it's always been obvious. Jungkook was only wishing for the impossible.

“You’re a pirate.”

The statement wedged a stake into his chest, splintering his heart into pieces. When you stepped away from him, confused horror marring your beautiful features, Jungkook knew that it was over.

He lost you.

A flurry of emotions, overwhelming and tumultuous, evidently took over you at his lack of denial. You looked to be just as heartbroken as he was.

“You’re a pirate,” you repeated, dazed. You wanted him to say something, anything. Much to his surprise, you didn’t sound angry. You took several steps back this time. The weight of pearls around your neck suddenly felt choking.

The sudden calling of his name had his head whipping around to look at his captain, watching the brutal exchange with gentle sternness. “We have to go.” The guards’ll be coming soon, no doubt.

Jungkook looked back to you, any and all words lodged in his throat. Despite the fear in your irises, a soft expression of acceptance folded over your visage, for under all his pirate exterior, he was still the same man that you thought so fondly of from your bakery. The look was short-lived however, quick to fade away when Jungkook reached out for you hesitantly. A part of him pondered how a simple baker managed to steal from the stealer. You had robbed him of his heart, and Jungkook didn’t even try to stop you.

Upon seeing you inch away in mortification at your new revelation, Jungkook retracted his arm and pursed his lips. The agony clawing at his stomach was begging to be set free. He wanted nothing more than to get onto his knees and plead for your forgiveness.

I’m sorry I lied. I’m sorry I’m not the man you thought I was. I’m sorry I fell in love with you.

His name came out again, this time from Yoongi. That meant it was serious.

“I’ll come back,” Jungkook said, tears rimming the bottom of his warm doe eyes. You watched him start to trek backwards. “I promise.” The words felt heavy on his tongue, like he was swallowing down a knot of thorned ivy.

Before you had the chance to say anything back, he was gone, bounding back to his ship with his comrades. Not long after, the distant barks of guards pursuing them rang throughout the village. You took that as your cue to leave. Swallowing down the urge to cry, you forced your eyes away.

You hoped he wouldn’t uphold his promise, for the both of your sakes.

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animatedrapture · 3 years

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"DEVOTION"

"Put a price on emotion, I'm looking for something to buy. You've got my devotion, but man, I can hate you sometimes."

"Why's it gotta feel like I'm walkin' a tightrope? Why you wanna see how far I fall?"

Characters: Suna Rintarou x F!Reader

Content Warning: Angst. NSFW. (Unprotected sex. Oral f. receiving) Exes to Lovers. Getting Back Together. Slight slowburn. Little bit of College AU. Post break up. Insecurity. Fluff. Hints at one night stands. Mentions of alcohol and smoking. Time skips. Some shifts in POV. Heavy mutual pining.

Word Count: Almost 5k, I wrote in drafts again so idk.

Violet's Note: Thank you so much for 5k, you whores !!! That's 5K Suna fuckers and counting :') I'm so proud of y'all. As a huge thank you, here's part two to Iron Grip that has been way overdue. And a short series (has two to three parts) "State of Grace" is also lined up!!

You let him. You watch from afar his beauty and every single thing you loved about him; you let yourself cry over the ache in your chest because you keep thinking about how much different it could be if you tried harder—if you hadn't let him let you go.

But you did. And God punish you if you come running back right after. You wanted this. It didn't matter how much you regret it when you see him and want nothing but wrap your arms around him.

Nothing is more persistent than a yearning heart, you learn this later on.

Taking a break from dating and focusing on college was counterproductive. It helped you keep your mind off of Suna Rintarō and receive above satisfactory marks—so much that you finally found your name coming before his in your last class together.

That is, if you hadn't doubted that he fluctuated with his academics for a good while.

He had; but it was hard to admit. Because admitting that was the same as admitting that you had affected him so much and that was a far too dangerous thought to entertain.

You don't see him for a long time; but it was a big campus and he has always been particularly busy.

Once in a while, however, you find yourself searching for him in the crowded hallways and the loud cafeteria—even the café nearby the both of you used to frequent.

Your breath catches on your throat every time you do see his familiar silhouette—yet just as quick as you find him, he's gone out of your sight.

One year. That's how long you don't talk to each other or just as much as acknowledge each other.

A year until you're standing directly across the room from him, in the same stupid house of that party that had you wrapped around his fingers.

He must've moved on now. He must've. There was no way you weren't but a painful memory, you convince yourself. Because then, he would've come around sooner, right?

Until a girl comes walking to his side, then she's whispering something to his ear—whatever it was, it's hard to ponder on any longer because his gaze lands on you.

Just like that night, he catches you staring again.

The alarms in your head are blaring and begging you to move, but your feet stay planted to the ground, and he's staring right back at you like he's hoping you're not just a mirage.

You can feel the sting behind your eyes but you can't find it in yourself to move. Maybe because the girl beside him is gorgeous and tall, and she looks like she's meant to be right beside him. You think you might vomit right now. There's a bitter feeling at the pit of your stomach and at the tip of your tongue and you hate it.

The longer you stare, the more you realize that: Fuck, they look so good together.

That's how it comes rushing back to you—the painful parts, the part that drove him away, pulling the two of you apart. Vile jealousy and insecurity, having convinced yourself he's too good for you.

And he let you go thinking he'd do nothing but hurt you if he stayed.

When you do feel your legs again, you're moving forward instead of backwards. Instead of running away like you always do.

By some miracle, Rintarō stops leaning against the wall. He's walking forward with his gaze holding yours, it makes you think he's coming to you but that couldn't be right…

There's a rush of memories that flashes behind Rintarō's eyes when he sees you.

He can't hear anything—everything is a tunnel vision towards you. He sees you standing there with the same look in your eyes years ago and the kind of longing that grips at his heart every single fucking day he lived without you.

One day. That's how long it took for Rintarō to figure out that nothing hurt more than being without you—but his mind plays back the look in your face every time you wondered if he truly loved you, every time you wondered if you were enough.

And he figures he would rather hurt without you than let you hurt with him.

On that night, Rintarō stuck by your side like nothing had changed. He knows he can't have you—god, maybe you don't even want him back to begin with—but he lets himself be selfish for one night.

One night, where his hands, his eyes, his lips are on you and in that moment you forget Rintarō has ever wanted anyone else but you.

Maybe if you knew it would always be you, then Rintarō would've never let you go.

You leave the country a week after—Rintarō's distraught, but he knew he could never keep you.

Osamu tells him—insists—he needed to find someone else, at least try. Rintarō doesn't listen, heart sinking.

-----

Another year passes, but nothing prepares Rintarō when he sees you overseas for a match. He's on his morning run, but the world around him slows down as he sees you from across the street, waiting for a bus to arrive.

His feet moves without thinking, then there's a loud beep, a strong gust of wind—he feels his soul leaving his body while the driver stops and to see if he's okay. But Rintarō's eyes are trained on the bus already leaving with you, like a chance he couldn't take.

On the day of his match, he could've sworn he saw you in the crowd.

But Rintarō has done so much wishful thinking. Maybe too much.

-----

You liked to think that you were single because you were enjoying yourself far too much. Life for you after university was fast paced and you've convinced yourself there's no room for relationships.

That's what you tell yourself. It wasn't because Rintarō had you still, that you loved him under the rain and against the sun.

You had barely made an effort to try dating someone else. It wasn't because of Rintarō, you're sure—even if you dream of being in his arms some days, starting a family with him other days, and nagged by nightmares of him with someone else in between soft, fluffy what if's.

You're sure it wasn't because of him.

That's why after EJP Raijin wins against the home country's team, after seeing him bright and beautiful like he's always been, always will be—you're booking a plane ticket back home.

-----

You make it home before you've landed back in Japan.

You gapped at Rintarō, who sat beside your assigned seat on the plane. An ache resounding from your chest and spreading over your body.

He hasn't noticed you, he's on his phone, typing away—so you swallow the lump in your throat and pull yourself together.

Rintarō, still observant, scoots slightly without looking up as you settle beside him. But the bracelet on your wrist catches in his line of sight, and he's quick to look up.

When your eyes meet his, you think you might choke and suffocate, for a minute, you stop breathing.

"Y/N," he calls you by your name. It sounds foreign only because it's been years yet the last thing he ever called you was the ever affectionate bunny.

Still, "Rin...tarō," you breathe, his name reluctantly rolling off your tongue.

"Hey," he smiles at you, with so much familiarity that tugs on your heart. "What've you been up to?"

His head tilts, his attention fully on you. Somehow, everything he does brings a drop of hope in your lungs and fills you with it.

You shake your head, "Not much, just more studying and work. What about you?"

He hums, "Just the same stuff. You're finally comin' back home?"

The conversation settles you in, comfortable and easy. As if he wasn't an ex, as if your heart never cracked and shattered along the way, as if you didn't have feelings lingering.

Hours on the plane felt like a blink, because it's been hours and you're still talking to Rintarō like he's an old friend.

And in some ways, he is. It's comfortable and it feels like home.

Rintarō felt like home.

The next thing you know, you're telling him everything you've been up to the past year, and he's telling you about the match he just had and that EJP won against the home team.

"Yeah, you were great, Rin," you laughed, but it dies down, because all of a sudden, he stops, and he stares at you.

"...How do you—Were you there?"

Your mouth opens, blinking back at him. Surely, there's no reason for you to lie now, you're obviously caught, especially when you look back at him and he's staring back at you like you've unraveled him.

You look away from him when you answer. "Y-yeah, I was."

"So it was you," he mutters.

"You saw me?"

He hums in confirmation, a pause follows after.

Trying to lighten up the topic, you pipe up, "Did you try the chuppets they had here?"

"Y'still remember that?"

You frown at him, confused, "Still remember what?"

He shakes his head instead of answering. Still confused, you continue, "Don't you always get your favorite purple chuppets after a match?"

"Mhm, yeah. But how do you still remember that? It's been years," he replies with a breath of laugh.

You shrug, "I just remember random stuff… or people who broke my heart," you joke. Lighthearted, because the ache in your chest has been replaced with ease, just like he always makes you feel.

He laughs a little with you, then he sighs, head tilting back and eyes shut.

"Yeah, I… really hurt you, huh?" His voice is low when he speaks, raspy and rough. "Loved you a fuckton, though… But then all I could think of was that I was hurtin' you and…" He pauses, clears his throat, then looks at you again. "Kept thinkin' about how it'd be like if I asked you to take me back, y'know. I jus' couldn't hurt you anymore."

You almost blank out everything he said. Only because you could feel your heart breaking and falling apart as he spoke, because every word was raw and forced your feelings to the surface all over again.

"To be fair… I never wanted you to let go of me," you speak, barely above a whisper, too vulnerable.

"I couldn't let myself hurt you like that. Not ever again—and that was that."

You nod, the smile on your face is bittersweet, faced with the reality.

"Mhm…" you trail off, and it's noncommittal.

"But we're good now, yeah?"

He tilts his heart towards you like he's genuinely curious, hoping you agree. So you laugh a little, shaking your head

"Yeah." Because you're both good now. You are.

"You've been travelling a lot, I've been doin' the same stuff… and I've been dating someone, think it's the best relationship I've been in," he grins while your heart breaks further.

You push it down, down, down into your gut—maybe save it for later if you have to, but for now you smile at him.

"Really?"

He hums, there's a content smile lingering on his lips that looks so familiar yet it pricks at your chest with a burn. "Never been this happy with someone before, y'know," he tells you, and you just want to shut everything out.

You feel nauseous but you tell yourself it's the turbulence—nevermind that the plane was flying smoothly.

"Well, congrats, Rintarō," you grit out his name because you can't stop calling him Rin in your head, "I'm happy for you," you continue, "I'm glad it all worked out."

And you are.

Even if for a second you debate on telling him you have a boyfriend too, even if you don't, and that you've never been more happy, and that everything is good.

But how could you lie to him?

Instead, you swallow the lies building up on your tongue and you shove it down in your throat, along your feelings and shattered heart, you keep it all down.

Then you save it for later.

When you land home, Rintarō offers you a ride. You tell him you already have someone waiting for you, even when you don't.

He leaves you with a smile and a heartache.

Just like you did with him a year ago, when you took the first flight away from home and left Rintarō with a hollow in his chest.

-----

Shutting the door of your apartment, you let your things fall to the floor with you, and you claw at your chest trying to ease the pain.

-----

Avoiding Rintarō was hard. It reminds you why you even left the country in the first place—because you were in the same friend group and your friends insist on making it to every match, every after party.

It's Atsumu that you have to thank when you do come, because he lets you know when Rintarō is going to make it and what time he comes.

Aside from Osamu, Atsumu was the other one who knew of your extensive relationship with Rintarō, the one you went to when you came home with a broken heart you never knew you'd have to nurse.

For long enough as the ache in your chest slowly subsided, you successfully avoid Rintarō.

For a little bit too, you try going on dates, feeling around the possibilities. Unfortunately, your heart wasn't quite in it, and you cease your feeble attempts.

You fall back into a routine, choosing work first and making the most out of being single. The time you spent with your friends were fun, and you meet new people you find yourself liking.

Just not enough to date again.

-----

Rintarō leaned against the bar, his ring-clad finger tapping against the table because if he succumbed to another stick of cigarette, he knew he'd be done for.

That was exaggeration, sure, but he knew he'd smoked far too much than he could ever be allowed to.

He squeezes his eyes shut. His heart sinks the same way when he found out you left the country—except this time, it was because his heart was broken after nearly a year of bliss.

The relationship was going so, so well—he should've known it was only a matter of time until it'll come tumbling down on him.

She broke up with him.

She wanted to settle down already, get married, start a family. Rintarō was happy, sure. He was happier than he's ever been in years, but he wasn't ready for that level of commitment. It scared him, rattled at his bones like he was a mere skeleton.

The painful part was that they tried to make it work, to compromise, to settle into a middle ground.

But she wanted something he couldn't give. Not even after he reasoned with himself that he loved her, that he could do it for her.

"Give me the sweetest drink you have," Rintarō hears a small laugh, light and easy.

When he looks up, all he could see is you.

You don't notice him, because there's a guy with his hands around your waist and then you're tugging the guy into one of the seats with your friends.

He thinks he could fall apart right there—but like you, he swallows it down with a final shot of his drink, then he's staggering out of the bar with the image of you burning in his head.

When he comes home, he thinks fuck it. His heart needed more repairing than his lungs ever could.

-----

Rintarō had broken up with his girlfriend, you hear from Atsumu.

Atsumu tells you, Rintarō's heartbroken, he's been drinking more than he should, and Osamu—despite being the closest to Rintarō—is this close to smacking him back to reality.

You consider showing up at his doorstep. Atsumu tells you not to, with every plead he could think of.

Against your better judgement, you attend one of Rintarō's games instead, and when they win despite the condition he's in—you get someone to deliver him his favorite chuppets.

-----

No matter how many times you tell yourself you've healed, it takes one more interference by the fates for you to realize it.

The ache in your chest that came along with Suna Rintarō wasn't the problem—it was the feelings that remained tucked in the very core of you.

Thinking you can face him again, you finally make it to the party after the match between EJP and MSBY.

Atsumu's elated, only because he scored the winning point, and insisted to rub it in Rintarō's face—who looked back at him completely unbothered, yet jabbed snide remarks with a smirk, insulting enough to make Atsumu yell in defense.

From across Rintarō, you laugh, your chin resting on the balls of your palm as you listened in on the conversations.

Beside Atsumu, sat Rintarō, who minded his own business and sipped on his drink. He looks a lot better now. It makes you feel relieved.

You swirl the drink in your glass; it was sweet and reminded you of the night Atsumu called you while you were out with your friends, frantically asking for your help with Rintarō, who had shown up in his doorstep drunk beyond comprehension.

You huff out a laugh, shaking your head at the memory.

"Somethin' funny, Y/N?"

Looking up, he's already looking at you, an eyebrow raised and green eyes brighter than you remembered.

"Mhm," you answer him with a grin.

"Share it, then. Damn, y'can't just be laughing on your own, people are gonna think you're crazy."

Your grin widens, "You wouldn't find it funny, Rin."

"Yeah? Try me."

He really wouldn't. Not when it was about him being flat out drunk. Nervously, you bring the glass to your lips and drink.

"I'd rather not. Why won't you tell me a story instead?"

"Nah, don't wanna," he dismisses you, standing from his seat.

"Where are you going?" You sounded like a lost puppy, but the words are out of your mouth before you can stop them.

His smirk is smug when he turns to you, "If you're so curious, you can come with."

You barely try to think it over, because you're standing from your seat too and following him out.

Rintarō stops at the bar, and he orders something that sounded too familiar.

"You been okay?" He asks as the bartender mixes up the drink, and he watches it be made even after his question.

"Mhm. Have you?"

"Yeah, lot better now."

The bartender brings the glass in front of you, pours the drink, and swirls whipped cream on top of it.

You stared at it. The same drink you always have. The one you just had.

"Huh?"

Finally, Rintarō turns to you, "You ran out already, didn't you?"

Just like that, he's tugging on your heartstrings all over again. You fall back into place the same way you both did in the airplane.

And you wonder why it's always so easy with him, because the drink in your glass was all gone, and Rintarō keeps looking at you like he's yearning.

Unbeknownst to you, you've done nothing but tug on his own. Rintarō, who was told that you helped Atsumu in all the times he was too drunk to remember anything, who was told the girl with this really pretty bracelet and really pretty eyes told the kid to give him this pack of chuppets to cheer him up.

Rintarō, who found out a week ago (thanks to Atsumu's unfiltered loudmouth) that you've been avoiding him for over a year because you still loved him all the same.

Rintarō, who always knew he'd always love you too.

You sigh, looking around. The party was lively as ever, almost like you're back in college again. Then you turn to him again, "'m gonna step out for a bit, Rin."

"'s it okay if I join you?"

"Well, I wouldn't stop you."

Rintarō follows you out into the back door, and the chatter fades in the background.

It was drizzling. Usually, you loved the rain, but you were in nothing but a dress that clung to your body almost like second skin.

The second you shiver, Rintarō's shrugging his jacket off and putting it over your body.

"Arm," he says, and it takes you a minute to realize what he means. You stretch your arm out, and he helps you into his jacket. It's big on you and reminds you of all the times you borrowed his clothes.

"Feel warmer?" He asks, eyeing you closely, standing close to you.

You nod, your fingers twitching because it's taking everything in you not to reach out to him and wrap your arms around him.

"You still smell the same," you blurt out instead, making him look at you funny before chuckling.

As if he finally heard your true feelings, Rintarō pulls you in and wraps his arms around you.

"Is this okay?"

You hug him tighter in response, "Yeah."

He exhales, deep and relieved.

"Rin?" He hums, and your heart hammers in your chest.

"Can you bring me home?"

He gives your waist a tentative squeeze before pulling away. "I'll get your stuff inside, yeah?"

Your lips twitch in a smile—because he's always going to be your Rintarō, caring and sweet.

You nod, "Okay."

-----

You follow Rintarō to his car, your bag still in his hand and his arm around your waist.

He opens the door for you, then lets your bag fall to your lap. He jogs around the car and slides in the driver's seat, starting up the car.

"The same place?" He asks.

"The same place," you nod.

There's no hesitation when you invite Rintarō in, and there's no hesitation when he enters your apartment.

The sound of the door shutting is muffled in your head, only because he finally pulls you in with a tug on your wrist, and for the first time in a long time, you finally feel his lips on you.

It's slow and longing, needy and almost desperate; like lovers who had lost each other and traveled from the dead the same way Orpheus did.

His hands are all over you, mapping you out all over again and yet he remembers you exactly the same. Until you pull away, breathless and eyes glossed over, his hands never leave your body.

You tug at his wrist, guiding him to your room.

The same way Rintaro had helped you in his jacket, he’s shrugging them off of you, and right as you’re about to hit the bed, his fingers tug on the zipper of your dress, sliding it down.

Literally, you fall into the bed with him. He’s on top of you, lips pressing against your neck and sucking lightly as you tugged on his shirt and unbuttoned his pants. When he does pull away, his movements are hurried, pulling his shirt over his head.

Your fingers dance over his torso as he gripped on your hips, with your legs parted for him, his erection pressing against your bare thigh and you can feel yourself soaking the thin fabric of your panties.

You suck in a breath when he leans down, fingers gathering your slick between your folds before pushing a digit inside you.

"Please..." You beg, wide eyed and needy, hips moving to fuck yourself on his fingers.

Fuck, you sounded cute. You looked pretty, you sounded alluring, just like he remembers you in the safest place in his chest, right where he kept you.

He latches on your clit, earning a loud moan from you, his tongue circling over the sensitive nub.

"Ooh!" You squeal, his finger curling inside you just as he sucked harshly. He withdraws the finger, pushing it back in with another, never taking his eyes off of you as your head tilted back.

He was drunk on the sweet taste of you, in the ways he knew exactly how to make you come undone, in the way you moaned out his name in whines.

His fingers scissor inside you, stretching out your warm, velvet walls as he lapped you up.

"Hnng—Rin, I-I, 'm gonna, oh god," you trembled, knuckles turning white as you gripped on the sheets tightly and clenched around his fingers incessantly pumping in and out of you.

Rintarō doesn't stop until you've come down from your high, tasting you on his tongue.

Even with your body weak underneath him, your hands reach out to cup his cheeks and bring his lips to yours. Then your lips move to the outline of his jaw, peppering him with kisses.

He tugs your dress completely off of you while you did so, his hands moving to your tits, thumb circling over your hardened nipples.

"Please..." You whisper, "Rin, want you in me... Please... Miss you so much."

Your breath on him feels hot, goosebumps appearing on his skin—everything feels so, so sensitive with you, like he's being thrown back to where he always should've been.

He moves to take off his pants, his thick cock slapping to his abdomen, then he's on top of you again.

His cock presses against your drooling cunt, making your hips jerk upwards, wanting more of him. You hold your breath as he lines the tip to your entrance, your mind buzzing with only Rintarō and his fingers digging in the flesh of your hips like he's holding back, his mouth closed around your nipple and teeth biting softly, eliciting a gasp from you.

Slowly, he inches himself in, your tight cunt hugging and clenching around the tip instantaneously—he hisses.

"S'tight, fuck—" he groans, moving slowly to let you adjust to his size as he pushes inside you inch by inch.

You're digging your nails on his biceps, mouth parted and back arching as he slowly bottomed out.

He rocks his hips steadily, slowly pushing in and out of your cunt sucking in back in greedily every time he pulls back. He bathes in your soft moans, your whines of his name, the familiar way you squealed and your eyes rolled back into your skull whenever he hit that spot inside of you.

But when you tell him to go faster, he does. He thrusts harshly, his cockhead pushing against your cervix over and over, throbbing as your walls spasmed around his length.

"Rin-Rin! Fuck, oh god, please—feels s' g-good," you moaned, hips moving to meet his thrusts.

"Yeah?" He breathes, one hand leaving your hips and reaching between your thighs, thumb rubbing circles around your swollen clit.

You whine, creaming around him, "Shit-" he groans, feeling you tightening around him and your thighs trembling around his waist, "Gonna cum for me, bunny? Yeah?"

"Mhm, mhm!" You nod, tears filling your eyes from the intense pleasure, "gon' cum for you, Rin."

Your voice higher in pitch and moans spilling out of you, joining the squelching sound of your pussy and every thrust that was slowly turning sloppier.

"C'mon bunny, cum for me, yeah? You'll be good for me, hm?"

Maybe it's the nickname, or the way his cock pushes deeper inside of you, or the praise he gives you—but it's what has you coming undone, body trembling against his hold and his string of curses following after.

Your walls convulse around him, so tight that it triggers his own orgasm, stilling from his thrusts.

He fills you full with his cum, and for a second he wonders if you're on the pill—but then he thinks it wouldn't matter, because if he wanted anyone to have his baby, it'd be you.

He falls on top of you, panting heavily. Then with the last of his energy, he rolls you on top of him, cock still snug inside you.

The room smelled and felt like sex, even as the panting ceased. You held on to him as if you weren't on top of him—he wasn't going anywhere and you knew that. But it scares you, still.

You reach your hand out, with his eyes closed and his heavy breathing, you place your hand against his cheek gently. Your tears fall before you notice you're crying at all.

You look up at him from your head lying against his bare chest. He feels warm, his hold on you feels like home, and he's making your heart fucking beat out of your chest as if you're falling in love again.

His eyelids flutter open, eyebrows pinching together to look back at you, mouth turning to a frown.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"I missed you," Your voice cracks. Lips quiver and corners trembling, trying to hold back a frown.

His arm around your waist tightens and pulls you impossibly closer. The breath he lets out is shaky, golden green eyes staring back at you with a certain vulnerability you've never thought you'd see on him.

"I missed you," He breathes out. His hand moving to cup your cheek, you lean into him instinctively.

His thumb rubs over the apples of your cheeks, the tears wiping away with the pads of his thumb.

"You're still the one, Rin. Always, always the only one," sobs interrupt with your words, tears blur your vision that it scares you he'd disappear in front of you.

Rintarō's frown deepens, watching your tears gather and well up in your eyes, falling over your cheeks.

"Yeah? Always?" He echoes your words, then he's leaning in and pressing his lips on your forehead with the kind of affection that makes you dizzy in the head.

"Always."

You can feel his smile against your skin, your hand against his chest trembling at the feeling of his heart thumping against your palms.

"Then we'll be alright, bunny. We'll be okay."

And you take his word for it. No words weigh heavier to you than his—especially when his heart feels like it's directly on your palms, letting you hold on to it.

#suna x reader #haikyuu angst #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu smut #suna rintarou #suna smut #suna angst #suna fluff #haikyuu fluff

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hogwartsmarvelmommy · 3 years

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Second chances and unspoken promises (TH) 🔥

Word count: 7.2k

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Summary: three years since the fall of your secret relationship, and a journey back to the place it all started. You could be leaving even more heartbroken, or maybe the stars will align and it'll be your time.

Warnings: some angst, fluff, smut. Secret relationship. Talk of a long secret relationship during early years. Break up, slight insecurities, overall I think that's it (let me know if you see anything I didn't mention)

Additional warnings: oral (f receiving) fingering, showering together, unprotected sex (don't be silly)

A/n this took me so long to finish 🙄 but here it finally is 😁

~~~

Your tires skidded to a stop on the blanket of white snow that led up the driveway of the large secluded cabin. The weather had progressively gotten worse from when you had first begun your drive until now, visibility dwindling quickly due to the large snowflakes fluttering down. You were sure with how heavily the snow was falling, by morning all the cars that lined the large drive would be covered.

It had been a few years since all of you had made the journey up, everyone's life becoming jam packed, and busy. This trip itself was a last minute plan. Sam had called just a few days prior, insisting you join. Something about a dire need for nostalgia or something to the effect.

The December's up here we're rough. Quite often having blizzards that would bury the cabin owners in for days, but even that didn't stop the Hollands. This year only the three eldest boys, and close friends Harrison Osterfeild and Tuwaine Barrett, had made the trek up, knowing the weather forecast was warning of a hefty snow storm.

You had been coming up to the Hollands family cabin since you were a tot, when your parents would accompany you, you were on every trip, so much so you had your own room, separated from the boys as you were always the only girl. This cabin was the place you had your first kiss, the place you lost your virginity, and it was also the place your heart had been broken into a million pieces.

You weren't sure exactly what had made you say yes, knowing the last time you stood inside the four walls, your world had crumbled down around you. Maybe it was curiosity, maybe it was just because you were reluctant to believe that that had really been the end.. three long years, and you were still just as in love with him as you were the first time you kissed him at only eleven, under the stairs in the potter closet.

You took a deep breath before shutting off your engine, not actually prepared to deal with the chill that was going to take over as soon as you opened the door to walk to the boot and collect your bag. You pushed the door open, swinging your feet out to the plush snow that was still coming down, you could get your bag and run, but that ran the risk of falling on your ass and making yourself freeze, or you could just endure the two minutes max it would take you.

You relentlessly walked to the back of the car, grabbing your heavy bag and lighter one as well before walking up the not so recently shoveled path.

You could hear the words echoing in your head as you neared the front door. "Your not enough y/n, your not worth it," the words had shattered you, making you feel less than a dirty tissue. You stood in the door that day, as you watched the love of your life leave, destined to do spectacular things, leaving you behind and broken. The worst part? No one had ever known what had gone on between the two of you. Years, of secret meet ups, stolen kisses, and dumb excuses.

The closest anyone had ever come to finding the truth was the winter of 2018, when Sam had seen Tom leaving your room in the middle of the night, hair a mess and sweaty as he sneaked back to his room. Somehow you had managed to convince him he had imagined the whole thing.. you still weren't sure how that had worked in your favor.

You took the final steps to the large oak door, glancing at the slab of concrete that held each of your hand prints embedded next to your names, ordered from oldest to youngest. Toms, yours, Sam's, Harry's and then Paddy's little baby hand, him barely being a year when you had made the sweet memory.

"Alright," you whispered as you turned the handle stepping into the toasty cabin. The smell of pasta hit you instantly, something you were sure Sam was whipping up. You heard loud conversations coming from in the main family room, with light music playing in the background. You dropped your bags down next to the staircase, slipping your boots off and onto the mat, and then stripping your heavy coat off, leaving you in just leggings, a light hoodie, and your maroon beanie. Nerves picking up at this point, unaware of who was here yet, and how you would be greeted, having not seen everyone in so long. There was a pattering coming towards you as you looked over to see the grown staffy running at you. "Hi Tess," you sang as you got to her level, letting her greet you with slobbery kisses. "Missed you too darling," you told her as you scratched her head.

"Tessa?" Tom called, rounding the corner and stopping at the sight of you with the pup, a sight he had seen before, when she was smaller, and you were his. "Hi," he whispered.

You glanced up, smiling before getting to your feet, Tess not leaving your side. "Hi Tommy," you said, barely above a whisper. Neither of you moved, standing there just looking at each other as if you were in a standoff, waiting to see who would do or say something first.

"Hey Tom do you- oh my god Y/n's here," Harry yelled pushing past his stunned older brother to wrap you in a long overdue hug. "Missed you kid," he told you, squeezing you too tight.

"Harry," you giggled, swatting at his curly red hair.

"Sorry, sorry. It's just been so long," he pointed out.

"Y/n?" Sam's voice was eager as he rounded the corner, nearly in a Sprint as he made his way to you. "God I'm so glad you came!" He screeched as he lifted you into his arms.

"Me too," you hummed, returning the hug.

"C'mon, let's go introduce you to everyone," Harry urged, grabbing your hand.

"Everyone?" You asked in confusion.

"Harrison, Tuwaine, and Sam's girlfriends," Harry told you. You nodded, not being aware there would be other girls on the trip. The news actually excited you, maybe the estrogen would calm the boys down from being so rowdy and rambunctious.

"Grace, Molly, Clark-" Harry announced, making the three girls turn towards you. "This is Y/n y/l/n, our oldest friend,"

The three girls got up making their way to you, as the four of you exchanged pleasantries.

"We have heard so much about you!" Gracie exclaimed.

"I'm really glad to finally not be the only girl up here," you admitted as you were ushered over to sit with the three of them.

Meanwhile, Tom was still standing in the front hall, not sure what to do with himself. He had thought that seeing you would be easy. You were just y/n, after all. But when his eyes met yours, the pink hue of your cheeks and nose, sent his mind rushing back to years prior, when he would pull you into the potter closet, freshly in from the snow, kissing the tip of your nose and cradling your hands as he attempted to warm you up. You would never know how much he had loved you, how much he had appreciated and cherished every stolen moment the two of you had shared together, up until the last one. The words still burned his throat, remembering the look on your face as he said them, desperate to not hurt you, but he somehow had managed to screw that up. He had just wanted to let you live your life, not following him around as his life had gotten too overwhelming, he hadn't wanted to put that stress on you, knowing you would have endured it for him, even if it killed you.

But to see you, just a few steps from him, letting Tess slobber on you with her kisses, nose red, cheeks rosy, in your signature cold outfit, wearing his old hoodie. He wanted to take it all back, he wanted to have crossed the distance pulling you into his arms, burying his face in your neck as he whispered how badly he missed you, and then to pull away, to meet your lips with his, in a warm kiss, a kiss that would bring it all back, every broken promise, every missed opportunity, every longing feeling..

"You alright mate?" Haz asked, bringing Tom out of his head.

"M'allright," Tom lied, knowing Harrison could see right through him, he was the only one who knew, knew how desperately Tom had loved you, how crushed he had been when he called things off, how hard it had been as he walked away from who he was sure was the one. You had been his first, first kiss, first shag, first love, first heartbreak… and he desperately wanted you to be his last. Last love, last kiss, last goodnight, last person he held in his arms on his deathbed. He was sure there was no way, not with the look you had given him three years prior, tears threatening to spill over the brim of your eyes, bottom lip quivering, as you just watched him leave, watched him walk out of your life with no promise to ever return..

This was sure to be a long trip..

You nestled your way between Harry and Tess laying your head on Harry's shoulder with your hot chocolate in your hands listening to the conversation they were all having. The fire in the wood burning stove was blazing, radiating a heat that was warming you all to the core. Dinner had come and gone with some slight small talk, leading to everyone shifting to the family room. Sam was in the middle of telling Tuwaine something, to which you weren't paying attention when Molly asked you a question.

"So y/n, do you have a boyfriend?" She asked, politely. Your cheeks flushed red as you lifted your head from where it was resting on Harry's shoulder before.

"No, no boyfriend," you told her with a chuckle.

"Really?" Grace interjected, now solely intrigued with the gossip. "How long since you had one?" She wondered.

"Three years, actually, pretty close to the day," you took a deep breath all to aware of Tom's, eyes directly on you from across the couch.

"Three years? Must have been some heartbreak," Clark said, a pitying look on her face. Truth be told, Tom was never your boyfriend, never having put a label on whatever it was the two of you had been doing, but she was right, it was definitely 'some heartbreak'.

"Yeah, I just wasn't enough," you said quietly, an ache in your chest knowing the man who had said those words sitting just a short distance from you.

"No way," Clark shook her head. "He wasn't good enough for you," she shot you a sweet smile.

"That's true," Tom muttered from where he had been sitting quietly on the couch, making all the girls turn towards him.

"Did you know him?" Grace asked. Tom's eyes widened, realizing he had spoken too loud.

"I- yeah," he sighed, knowing they were going to quiz him on the subject now.

"Was he awful?" Molly wondered.

"No, he was great,"

"He was an ass,"

You and Tom had spoken at the same time, you looked up, eyes meeting him in a lingering stare. "He was great," you repeated, not looking away from him.

"How could you still think that after what i- he said to you?" Tom asked. With your attention fully on him, you could almost forget the others in the room with you.

"He was young, I was younger. Life caught up with us and made the fantasy we were living too real too fast, doesn't mean I have to hate him. I still love him, never stopped…" you reached next to you scratching in between Tessa's ears. "Sometimes you have to push past the hurt to try and understand other people," you whispered, not daring to look up.

"Is he your soulmate?" Harry asked. You looked besides you, not even aware that he had tuned into the conversation.

"I don't know," you chuckled.

You looked across from you to see Tom's sight glued to his hands in his lap, completely unreadable.

"Have you been with anyone since?" Grace asked, everyone turning to you.

"Like?"

"Sexually?"

"Oh," you felt your cheeks heat up at the question. "No actually, he's the only man I have ever been with," you admitted, making Tom's head shoot up to look at you, shock plastered on his face.

"Three years?" Harry gasped, Dramatically sliding down as though he was wounded. "That's too damn long to not be laid," he told you.

"I agree," Grace giggled.

You shook your head and let out a chuckle. You had never been able to bring yourself to move on, fear that it would be betraying your heart, which clearly belonged to someone else, after so many years, it still belonged to him..

It was nearly two am when the welcoming conversation died down, Clark and Sam excusing themselves first, followed closely by Harry, and Then you.

You grabbed your bags, heading up the stairs to the room that had been yours for so many years. The door creaked open, as you pushed through, dropping your bags at the end of the old bed before switching on the lamp. A picture of you and Tom neatly placed in a frame next to it.

You could still remember the day it was taken, Niki had been following behind all of you as you hiked up the big hill to sled down. You had lost your balance, falling over and pulling Tom down with you, into a soft pile of snow. The smiles on your faces as you had been giggling were so pure, filled with love and adoration. Even Niki could see that, snapping a picture of the moment to be frozen in time forever.

You walked over to the bed, sitting down lightly as you watched the snow fall from out the window. The view was mesmerizing. The white blanket covering the ground making it impossible for it to be dark.

You had forgotten how at home it felt here, being where you had grown into a woman, almost every important defining moment happening within these four walls. There was a soft knock on the door.

"Yeah?" You called out. The door creaked open, and Harrison's head peaked in.

"Can we talk for a sec?" He asked you.

"Sure," you nodded to him, before he finished opening the door and walking over to sit beside you.

"I know it really isn't my place to tell you this, but he loves you. He's crazy about you, and that never stopped," he looked over to gauge your reaction.

"Haz,"

"Y/n, I know that what he did was awful, but you have to know his intentions were pure," you took a deep breath and nodded before sitting back to hear what he had to say. "You knew how busy he got during the civil war, and then with homecoming and infinity war it was even worse, he didn't want to put you through it anymore. With Endgame, and Far from home he had almost no time to do anything else. And he knew it was going to be that way, he knew he wasn't going to be able to be there for you," he explained.

"He told me-"

"I know. I know what he said, and I'm not saying you have to forgive him, but just know, he didn't mean it, okay?" He looked at you with his soft blue eyes, trying to fix his best friend's mess. Honestly, what Tom had done hurt you, but you knew he hadn't meant it, there was no way he had meant it.

"Okay," you nodded.

"Okay, got to get back to Gracie now," he told you as he jumped up and rushed out. You turned your attention back to the window, hopeful that this trip would get you answers, or at least some closure.

You opened your eyes to the splattering noise at your window. You could see the remnants of an exploded snowball splattered about. You rolled out of bed, pulling the fuzzy blanket that had been on top of you around your body as you made your way to the window. Sam was bundled up, running as Harry charged at him, a freshly made snowball in hand as Tom stood holding Tessa's leash as he watched his younger brothers goofing off.

He glanced up to the window seeing you looking down at him and lifted his hand in an awkward wave. You giggled and waved back, walking away from the window, and making your way downstairs. The quietness of the house led you to believe everyone else was still asleep. You walked over to the still lit wood stove and tossed in a few more logs to ensure the heat would continue.

You had never been a great cook, you were actually certifiably bad, but you still decided to go to the kitchen and begin to pull out the ingredients for breakfast.

You were on your tiptoes about to reach the flour when you heard the front door open and felt the gust of wind.

"What are you doing?" Sam asked casually as he walked up to the fire sticking his red hands out to get warm.

"Breakfast," you proudly stated.

"God, no, please y/n, anything but that," Harry groaned as he made his way in.

"Hey!" You pouted. You couldn't actually be offended, you would have probably ended up giving everyone food poisoning had you gone through with the cooking.

"Don't bully her, she's not that bad of a cook," Tom said as he rounded the corner pulling the beanie from his head to expose his crazy hair. "She makes some mean cookies," Tom reminded them.

"Oh no," Harry groaned, falling back onto the couch.

"Baking and cooking are two completely separate things Tom," Sam started.

"You had to open that can of worms?" Harry asked, looking at Tom.

"See the science behind-"

"God! No Sam!" Harry groaned again, making a giggle erupt from your chest.

"I want to hear Sammy, tell me," you instructed leaning against the counter. Sam shot a cocky look over to Harry before turning and lecturing you for the next thirty minutes on the differences in cooking and baking, and why chefs were not considered bakers and vice versa. By the end you were sitting at the kitchen island as Sam finished the pancakes and bacon.

"Interesting," you mumbled as he slid a plate of food your way.

"It truly is," he agreed. You grabbed your fork beginning to eat the food on your plate when you felt a hand on the low of your back. You glanced up with your mouth full to see Tom standing beside you, not even aware of where his hand was placed, or if he was, he wasn't showing it. "Here," Sam said as he slid the plate to him.

"Thanks Lad," he said as he sat down onto the stool next to you, hand leaving your back as he moved it to grab his fork. He noticed the look on your face of shock. "You alright?" He wondered.

"Uh- yeah, I'm okay," you nodded, turning your attention back to the food In front of you.

One single touch and you were completely undone, couldn't even muster the ability to speak. What were you supposed to do for the next week and a half? You weren't sure you could manage…

"Morning y/n," Clarke said as she walked up behind you. "Morning handsome," she said to Sam.

"Morning beautiful," he said before rounding the counter to giver a quick peck and set a plate In Front of her. "Eat," he instructed. She sat down next to you and started to eat the food. Soon enough everyone had woken up and eaten breakfast.

"We should go up to the hot springs," Harry said from in front of the fireplace.

"Awful idea," Harrison laughed.

"Why?" Gracie asked suddenly.

"The water is nice and warm, but then when you get out you're still wet and have to hike back down to the cabin, it's miserable," he explained quickly.

She nodded, "yeah we will pass,"

"Okay," Harry shook his head, "Sam? Clarke?"

"Yeah we will go," Sam answered.

"Cool, y/n? Tom?"

You glanced up from where your nose had been buried In a book having heard your name called with Tom's. "What?" You asked.

"Hot springs?"

"Ohh, yeah, I'll go," you sent Harry a smile and glanced over to Tom who had raised brows.

"Count me in too," he said, not looking away from you.

"OK, I'll go see about the other two," he announced, jumping to his feet.

"Don't barge in Baz, you'll see something you don't want to see," Harrison laughed, causing everyone else to give a disgusted groan. "What? You all believe they have been "resting" all morning?" He asked.

"No but you didn't need to say it," Clarke laughed burying her head back into Sam's shoulder.

Everyone walked ahead of you through the soft snow. The hike up the hill itself wasn't extremely hard, but with the added difficulty of the freshly fallen snow, it seemed to be a much more daunting task. The hot springs were just a little past the sledding hill, and should have only been about a ten minute walk, but you were sure it was easily minute twenty by now.

Tom could see you struggling, just like old times, he fell back from the rest of the group until you caught up with him. "Here," he said, offering out his arm.

You grabbed it eagerly, as you attempted to keep your dwindling balance. "thanks," you mumbled as the two of you began to walk.

"How have you been?" Tom asked quietly. Looking over at your rosy tinted face.

"Alright, working a lot.. you?" You asked.

"Working," he agreed with a chuckle.

"The Netflix film was good," you told him.

"You watched that?" He wondered. You could sense the surprise in his voice.

"Of course Tommy, I've watched everything you have been in," you chuckled.

You could see from your peripheral vision that his cheeks seemed to get a darker shade of red. "Your favorite?" He asked.

"Most definitely civil war," you said. "Recognize that butt anywhere," you giggled.

"Oh shit up," he groaned, rolling his eyes. You couldn't help the nostalgic feel that washed over you

You and Tom trailing behind, lost in your own conversation, while everyone else was way ahead, not minding the two of you. You're not sure how no one ever caught on to the two of you, you were sure, had you been an outsider looking in, it would have been painfully obvious as to what was going on.

"You remember winter of 17'?" You asked.

"Hard to forget, we came out here almost every day," Tom chuckled.

"That year was a good one," you sighed.

"Winter of 18' was pretty good though," Tom said, glancing over to you.

"The beginning," you nodded.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"It's ok Tommy, I know you didn't," you told him, a sudden sadness in your eyes as you cut him off.

"I wish I could take it back," he whispered.

"Do things differently?" You asked.

"Yeah, I wouldn't have hid what we had, you deserved to be shown off to the world, not pulled into the closet Every Time I wanted to kiss you," he explained.

"Hey," you said, "I have some of my best memories in that potter closet," you teased.

"Yeah," Tom sighed. "I do to,"

You both walked in a comfortable silence before finally catching up with the others at the natural hot springs, the water letting off a beautiful steam, surrounded by white fluffy snow.

"It's gorgeous out here!" Clarke exclaimed as she shimmied out of her clothes to rush into the water.

"Not as gorgeous as you, sweetheart," Sam teased.

"Blegh," Harry faked a gag. "Stop being so gross," he told his twin.

"Oh, piss off Baz," Sam quipped back.

She was right though, it was a gorgeous sight, and it brought back many fond memories to be back.

"Ok, y/n, craziest sexual experience?" Clark asked as you all settled in the hot water.

"What?" You asked shocked.

"She does this, you'll get used to it," Harry told you.

"Oh, well.. what classifies as crazy?" You asked.

"Public, secret, kinky.. whatever you can think." She explained.

"Ok, well I guess there was this one time, up at a ski lodge. We were stopped on a trail because someone had eaten it pretty badly, and so we just went behind the trees and-"

"Y/n!" Tom interrupted.

You glanced over to him to see his face red in shock, and noticed the other three also had a shocked look on their faces.

"What?" You asked quickly.

"How do you and Tom have almost an identical story?" Sam asked.

You felt your stomach tighten up. Of course this hadn't been a new question. You should have just lied and kept the story to yourself. "I.. I don't know," you said pathetically.

"Y/n.." Harry deadpanned. "Who was it with you at the ski lodge?"

You felt your face flush even redder, as you didn't know what to say or how to get yourself out of this mess.

"Oh My God!" Sam exclaimed. "I knew I wasn't fucking crazy," he announced turning to Harry. "I caught Tom sneaking out of Y/n's room one night!"

"Wait a minute-" Tom interrupted.

"No. No, you two were shagging," Sam accused with a bony finger pointing at Tom.

"Sam it's not-"

"You're not denying it?!" Harry gasped looking back and forth between the two of you.

You sighed loudly as you looked at Tom, who looked just about as embarrassed as you felt.

"How long?!" Sam asked. "When did it start?"

Tom sighed before shooting you an apologetic look. "First time was in 2013," Tom said.

"2013!? Thomas! You lost your virginity to Y/n?!" Harry exclaimed, completely shocked.

"That was after two years of a lot of kissing and hand stuff," Tom admitted.

"Tommy!" You exclaimed, throwing him a look.

"Let me get this straight," Harry chuckled dryly. "The two of you started to mess around at 14 and 15?"

"More or less," you told him.

"And you just kept it hidden?" Sam asked.

"I mean… yeah," Tom admitted.

"So how long did it last?" Clarke asked.

"Until the winter after Infinity war," Tom said.

"Thomas, that's like seven years," Sam pointed out.

"Well if you count from the first time we kissed then-"

"Tom stop," you instructed. "Yeah me and Tom, did things, and we hid it because we knew it would cause problems," you explained.

"For who?" Sam asked, confused.

"For us," You told him, "Tom was twenty two and I was twenty one and I told him that I would come with him, but that meant Making things real between us, and leaving the little bubble we had created, so he called it off," you explained.

"Is that what you think?" Tom asked.

"No, that's what happened," you told him.

"No, you had just been accepted into uni, and I had to leave for filming, and I told you I didn't want to be without you, so you offered to give up on uni. I couldn't let you do that, I needed you to live out your dream, that's why I called it off," Tom admitted.

"What?" You asked shocked.

"You thought this whole time I was scared to commit to you?" Tom wondered.

"Umm, yeah," you admitted.

"I feel like this is a very private conversation," Clarke whispered to Sam.

"Shh, it's about to get better," he told her quietly.

"Y/n, I only did what I did because I was so in love with you," Tom whispered, as he moved closer to you.

"Tom, you told me and I quote 'you are not enough y/n. You're not worth it'" you reminded him.

"Only because I couldn't see any other way to get you to let me go, it was wrong, and I shouldn't have said that, because I didn't mean it…" he explained. His eyes were warm and genuine as he brought his hand up to your cheek. "The only thing I ever wanted with you was the real deal. I wanted to bring you home to my parents, even though you grew up knowing them. I wanted to have you on my arm at the premieres and at random galas I have to attend, but I knew that uni was your dream, and you worked so hard for it, I couldn't be the reason you missed out on that," he explained.

"I graduated early," you blurted without thinking.

"What?" Tom asked, eyebrows furrowing together.

"I graduated last month. A year early, I got my bachelor's degree in business," you told him.

"Y/n, that is amazing," he exclaimed, pulling you into his arms.

"Yeah, I achieved my dream," you mumbled against his chest.

"That's so great, I'm so proud of you," he told you before Pulling back and crashing his lips into yours, for a moment you nearly forgot about the company that was with you, being completely captivated by his lips on yours.

"I want to say I didn't see that coming," Sam chuckled.

"I didn't," Harry admitted.

"Awweee," Clark exclaimed.

Tom pulled away, whispering a quick sorry before moving back to sit down, but not letting his hand leave where it rested around your waist.

You spent the next two hours at the hot springs explaining how you snuck around for so many years without anyone finding out.

You walked up the steps to the back door of the cabin completely frozen from your wet undergarments underneath your clothes. "I call shower first!" You exclaimed running through the door and straight through the kitchen and the living room towards the stairs.

"Have fun?" You heard Harrison call out.

"Frozen solid, I'll answer when I've thawed," you called back.

You slipped your clothes off before you started the water, letting it warm up. You slipped your chilled body into the warm stream, feeling the pins and needles from the sudden temperature change.

There was a soft knock on the door before it opened.

"I'll be fast," you called out not knowing who had come in.

"You're going to use all the hot water," Tom's voice teased.

You peaked your head out the curtain seeing him leaning against the counter with a smirk on his face. "I don't take that long," you told him.

"You know, we could just shower together, save water." He told you.

"What an environmentalist, you are," you teased.

"Is that a no?" He Wondered.

"Did I say no?" You asked, feeling your stomach fill with butterflies.

You heard him chuckle before the sound of a zipper. "Y/n?" He asked.

"Yeah, Tommy?" You bit down on your bottom lip waiting anxiously.

"You can tell me to leave, I'd understand it if you didn't want me around," he nearly whispered, fear lacing his tone.

"Tommy,"

"Yeah y/n?"

"Better get in here before I use all the hot water," you quipped. You didn't have to tell him again, with one swift motion, the curtain opened just enough for him to slip into the rather small shower. His hands found your waist almost instantly, pushing your body against the cold tile, crashing his lips into yours. It was nothing new, you had done this so many times before, but there was just something different about it. Maybe it was that you hadn't been with him in three years, or maybe it was because now you weren't hiding, or maybe, just maybe, it was because life had finally aligned just right, and it was your time.

You reached your fingers up to the nape of his neck, fingers twiddling with the curls. His fingers dug into your hips as he pushed his bare body against yours.

Your skin burned under his touch, a fire blazing inside of you. Tom's lips moved from your mouth down to your jaw and then to your neck.

"Y/n?" Harrison's voice called out, you hadn't even heard the door open. Tom lifted his head from your neck and you clasped your hand over his mouth.

"Yeah Haz?" You asked.

"You and Tom talked?" He wondered.

"Little bit," you admitted as Tom chuckled, shaking his head.

"Good, good. Was worried he was going to be a puss and never admit his truths to you," he said, making Tom furrow his brows together. "He can be a real div, ya know. Never knows the right thing to say," at this point you rolled your eyes knowing very well that Harrison was more than aware that Tom was in the shower with you, and was just trying to push his buttons. Which seemed to be working. Tom gripped your wrist pulling your hand from his mouth.

"Hey mate, while I do love hearing about my flaws," tom said, "I'd really like to make up for losing the last three years here, so unless you're trying to hear that-"

"I'm going," Harrison chuckled, exiting the bathroom in a rather quick fashion.

"We will never live this down," you pointed out.

"Honestly y/n, who cares," he whispered, returning his lips to your neck, sucking slightly on your sweet spot.

Your fingers laced into his curly hair tugging lightly. "Tommy," you whimpered.

The thing that had always been so easy between the two of you was that Tom had helped you discover yourself. Everything you had ever wanted, Tom had given you, he was one one of the most understanding and patient men you had ever met. So as you withered away under his lips on your neck whimpering his name, he knew just what you wanted.

He slipped his hand from where it was placed on your hip, down to your aching core.

"Right here, darling?" He asked as he pushed his knee between your legs, giving him enough room to slip his hand between your thighs.

"Please," you begged. His fingers slid seamlessly through your already soaking folds.

"Always so good for me," he whispered into your ear, making your knees feel weak.

He trailed his fingers through your folds and right up to your clit, rubbing slight circles on the little bundle of nerves. You dropped your head to his shoulder, letting out a moan.

"Tommy- s..So good," you told him before he gently pushed a finger in.

"Still so tight I see," he whispered, slipping another finger in.

You lifted your head Back up, crashing your lips into his. His tongue swiped across your bottom lip, and you eagerly gave him access. It was a heated mess of teeth clashing as neither of you seemed to be able to get enough of the other. Tom curled his fingers inside you, making you gasp as he found the right spot. You threw your head back, hitting the tile wall a little harder than you intended.

"Right there?" He asked.

"Mhmm," you panted as you felt the band in your belly getting ready to snap.

"Want you to let go, pretty girl, can you do that for me?" He asked.

His words pushed you over the edge, hips moving on their own accord as a pornographic moan left your mouth.

"That's it my pretty girl," Tom cooed as he worked you through the high, eyes never leaving you.

As soon as your legs quit shaking and the quiet whimpers stopped leaving your lips, Tom pulled his hand from where it had been between your legs, bringing the two fingers he had buried inside you up to his mouth and sucking them clean.

"Christ Tom," you groaned.

"Was that good princess?" He asked.

"So good," you nodded, pushing your lips back against his.

KNOCK* KNOCK*

"Y/n! You're going to use all the hot water!" Sam called through the door.

"Probably should get out," Tom chuckled.

"Yeah," you agreed.

You turned the water off, quickly hopping out and wrapping a towel around your wet body, Tom doing the same thing.

You picked up your clothes before opening the bathroom door to Sam standing there, waiting. Your cheeks went rosy as you walked out of the bathroom first.

"Sorry," you mumbled, making your way down the hall to your room. Tom stepped out with his clothes, turning down the opposite side of the hall to his room.

"In the shower?!" Sam groaned.

"Sorry mate," Tom chuckled.

You got to your bedroom, dropping your soiled clothes into the hamper before rummaging around for some comfy warm clothes. You settled on an old hoodie that you had stashed in the wardrobe (you were pretty sure it was once toms) and a nice pair of fuzzy pajama pants.

You collapsed onto your bed, hair still wet and mind going a million miles an hour. Your door creaked open, and you didn't even have to look up to know who it was.

"You alright?" Tom asked.

"More than alright," you answered, not even looking over to him.

"So you graduated?" He asked.

You propped yourself up on your elbows. "I did," you nodded.

He nodded, a smile spreading over his face. "What are you doing now?" He wondered.

"Haven't really decided yet," you admitted. It was the truth, you had barely moved your stuff out of your dorm and back to your parents house, you weren't sure exactly what you were planning to do.

"Can I throw you an idea?" Tom asked.

"Please," you giggled.

He walked over, plopping down on your bed, pulling you into his lap so you were straddling him.

"Come with me," he whispered.

"Where?" You giggled, wrapping your fingers in his hair.

"Anywhere, everywhere, just stay with me?" He begged.

You leaned forward resting your forehead to his and sighing."Tommy, I never wanted to leave you in the first place," you admitted.

"I love you," he told you, looking into your eyes, with his honey golden brown ones.

"I love you," you whispered. Tom leaned more into you, lips searching for yours. His hands grasped your ass as he pressed your lips together eagerly. It was like he said, you had to make up for the lost three years.

You let yourself get lost in Tom's lips, feeling like a lovesick teenager all over again. You rocked your hips against his as you kissed, feeling him growing beneath you.

You continued your movements, pressing your core harder against his growing bulge, making him groan into the kiss. You knew what you were doing, bringing Tom to the point of no return.

“Y/n” Tom groaned into your lips.

“What is it, pretty boy?” you asked as you let your lips travel down to his neck, nibbling and sucking on all the exposed skin.

“I want you,” he whispered, hands running up and down your covered back.

“You have me,” you chuckled against his skin, “You have always had every bit of me,” Tom clutched your ass as he flipped you on your back, returning his lips to yours in a demanding, intention filled kiss. His hands traveled to the hem of the hoodie, before he pulled it up lightly. You sat up pulling it over your head and tossing it to the end of the bed. Tom doing the same with the shirt he had on, before finding his way back to your body.

“God i have fucking missed you,” Tom groaned as he trailed his lips from yours to the valley of your breasts, pausing at each one to pay your nipples attention. You groaned as his lips enveloped the hardening bud, while he took the other in his fingers. He knew what you liked and how you liked it, and he knew how to get you right to the point he wanted… you begging for him. He moved his lips farther down your abdomen, sucking gently before making it to the bend of your pajama pants. He hooked his fingers into the waistband, shooting you a look, waiting for confirmation. You quickly nodded. He pulled the pants down your legs painfully slowly as he drank in the sight of your body.

“So perfect,” he complimented as he took the pants from around your ankles, dropping them to the floor. He had your leg in his grasp and took the opportunity to place a kiss on your ankle, trailing them gently and slowly up your legs, making the ace you felt in your core intensify dramatically. “Oh Tommy,” you groaned as he placed a kiss on your bundle of nerves.

“What is it, love?” He asked innocently from between your legs.

“Tommy please,” you let out, fingers intertwined in his messy curls. “Please fuck me,” you begged.

You saw the smirk flash across his face as he pushed himself up from in between your legs crashing his lips into yours. You reached down as you eagerly attempted to rid him of his sweats, failing miserably in the heat of the moment. “I've got it,” he chuckled as he peeled the fabric from his body, freeing his aching cock, from the hold of the fabric. Just the sight of him there, naked, between your legs, hand wrapped around his hard member was mouthwatering.

“Ready,'' he asked as he ran his tip through your soaking folds. You nodded eagerly as he slowly sank into you, stretching you beautifully.

Three years, but it was still like muscle memory. Your hands grasped at Tom's neck as your legs snaked around his waist. “Want me to be gentle?” He asked as he bottomed out.

“We have the rest of our lives to be gentle,” you told him. “But right now,” you lifted your lips to his ear as you nibbled on his lobe gently. “I want you to wreck me,” You whispered, making a guttural groan leave his lips before he began thrusting into you.

Your head fell back onto the bed as tom pounded into you, back arching from the mattress as each stroke of his cock brushed eagerly on your g spot. You could feel yourself already clenching around him. Barely any time and you were already about to give in.

Tom's movements slowed suddenly as he brought his lips to yours and kissed you. “I'm sorry, y/n, you'll never know how sorry I am,” he whispered.

You couldn't stop the tears from rushing to your eyes at the sentiment behind his words, knowing how sincere he actually was.

“I forgive you Tommy,” you whispered, kissing him deeper. His movements quickened once again, as he pushed you closer and closer to the edge. “Tommy,” you whimpered as you felt your walls begin to clench around him.

“Me too baby,” he groaned as you felt him twitch inside of you. You brought your lips back to him as you both fell over the edge, a beautiful symphony of pure ecstasy taking over both of your bodies.

Tom fell beside you, arm draped over you as you both laid there, chests heaving and legs shaking. “Can't believe I lasted three years without you,” Tom mumbled.

“I don't know how you did it,” you teased.

“Y/N,” He said seriously. You looked at him with furrowed brows. “I was serious, come with me, be with me?” you felt the breath hitch in your throat as you watched the nervousness take over him, awaiting your answer.

“Yes,” you whispered as your head nodded. Tom's face lit up as he pulled your body against his, lips clashing again, but in a different way, a way that felt like it would be forever. An unspoken promise being sealed between two people desperately in love after all this time.

taglist:

@violetlilysunshine

@petesrparker

@harryhollandsgirlfriend

@mcushvft

@elishi03

@nelebynele

@sunwardsss

#tom holland angst #tom holland fluff #tom holland smut #tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland x y/n #tommy

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maximotts · 3 years

Text

♡ 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘢𝘵 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘱𝘵. 𝘪𝘪𝘪 ♡ {𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢𝘯𝘢𝘵}

pt. i || pt. ii

a/n: Final part, yeehaw!! Shout out to the two people who've figured out what the titles are from, I love y'all. That song inspired this fic so it was fitting. I thoroughly enjoyed writing this and I can't wait to write more wandanat stuff in the future! Enjoy watching these little gays heal their hurt, I promised it ended happily and I'm here to deliver

warnings: This is an 18+ chapter; angst, smut (fingering, oral, (w receiving), nat being a tease) and fluff hours; reliving the initial argument day, more of Wanda reading Natasha's thoughts in the first part

summary: Wanda finally sees that awful day and they both start to heal

words: 4.1k

masterlist. || navi. || request info/rules. :open

𝘮𝘰𝘺𝘢 𝘴𝘭𝘢𝘥𝘬𝘢𝘺𝘢 𝘥𝘦𝘵𝘬𝘢 = 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘵 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭 𝘥𝘦𝘵𝘬𝘢 = 𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘺 𝘥𝘰𝘳𝘰𝘨𝘰𝘺 = 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵

✣ ✣ ✣

Natasha was so tired. Strategies and what ifs rolling through her head like a conveyor belt, each one theorizing how she could’ve saved those people. She could’ve done it. The only reason she’d failed was because she was weak; an unforgivable lapse in judgement. Grief rose within her as she showered; the warm water unfortunately only cleansing her physical mess. Her plan had been to sit until her consciousness pulled her into sleep. There were bound to be nightmares, there always were after her harder missions, but she could let it ride out and then shove it away in the morning.

But then Wanda arrived. She settled in behind her and it took great restraint not to growl at her to leave her alone. But then Wanda was holding her and breathing against her neck and deep within she felt shielded. Perhaps if she told Wanda what had happened… she’d find out eventually in some briefing or another anyways. No, put it away. She needs you more than you need her.

Sleep came eventually, but the night terrors did not. Her bad mood remained, instantly overwhelmed with guilt. She wanted to shake it off like she did the sleep from her eyes, but no luck. Natasha saw Wanda’s blanket strewn over her, but no Wanda. A clearer part of her vaguely wondered where she’d gone, but she didn’t give it too much attention. That girl had a way of popping up sooner or later whenever Natasha so much as coughed.

True to form, Wanda was curled up next to Natasha a few hours later in the lounge, rambling about something Nat couldn’t bring herself to care about. Just tell her to give you a day to yourself, she’ll live. She’s probably used to entertaining herself. But before she could find the words, Tony’s insufferable need to meddle broke through. It was a blur when she’d thrown the knife, rad haze clouding her vision while she watched Tony back through the door. She would’ve gone after him in that moment, friendly camaraderie be damned- today was not the day. But Wanda’s touch subconsciously grounded her and she settled, even when the air felt tight in such close proximity to another. Natasha resented just how much Wanda fretted over her. It wasn’t going to change her demeanor, wouldn’t fix anything, bring any lost lives back. So what was the point? Surely she knew when to let someone sulk in peace.

After training’s impromptu end, Natasha was exhausted, physically and mentally, and now she was soaked in rainwater. The only thing she needed to do was have a quick follow up with Steve and then she’d lock herself in her room for a long overdue isolation night. The promise of absolutely no interruptions for at least twelve hours was the only thing keeping her still on her feet.

Until she tripped over nothing.

It never happened. She was well-known to be the most agile person on the team and the misstep only spoke to just how tired she was. The loss of balance irritated her enough, but then Wanda was bumping into her and she just… lost it.

Natasha was inhumanly still while Wanda played the events back between them. It would’ve worried her if it were anyone else, but she knew she was only waiting. Body taut and immobile as if one move would break her all over again. Insults were hurled without care in her memories and both of them fought the urge to fall to pieces. It hurt, ached- Wanda feeling like she’d scraped a healing scar and Natasha choking with the renewed reminder of her cruelty. Thin fingers scratched lovingly at the base of her scalp, comforting her even as she drowned in her shame and the thought crossed Natasha’s mind of just how deep Wanda’s care ran to try to settle the woman who’d broken her heart and spirit. “Shh, Natty, I’m almost done…” There was just a little more she wanted to see; Wanda needed to know how sincere Natasha had been. Reassurance that she wasn’t being lied to just to spare what Natasha saw as her fragile feelings.

The weeks of trying and failing to seek out the younger woman was where Wanda finally began to feel her shirt soak with tears. Natasha had lingered around Wanda’s known favorite areas for days, grew concerned when she wasn’t showing up to meal times only to sink deeper into despair once she discovered she was purposefully avoiding eating when Natasha did. Distress increased each day as she asked around and no one had talked to Wanda past inconsequential small talk. Scared her mistake forced Wanda to retreat away from not just her, but everyone from either embarrassment with what they’d unfortunately overheard or fear of burdening others the way she now thought she did Natasha.

Above everything as she ventured, Wanda felt missed and loved by Natasha. She caught passing considerations, little things, of wondering how she was doing, if she remembered to take her makeup off before bed because Natasha was usually the one to remind her, even checking the guest logs to see if Wanda was ordering her usual Saturday night pizza slices she’d so excitedly dragged Natasha into.

Natasha’s genuine adoration for Wanda, finding herself smiling most times she caught Wanda doing so or simply when she watched her. Her awkwardness in whatever new thing they’d created, some kind of relationship neither of them had named yet. Her desperation to remain a rock for Wanda; take care of her so she always had someone to lean on, even when Natasha needed someone to take care of her. Fear that she’d wrecked one of the only pure things she had in her life, not to mention the ray of sunshine who carried those warm feelings wherever she went. The depression that came after. The knowledge Wanda may never speak to her again accompanied by the sobering reality that she didn’t deserve such gentle intimacy if she was going to treat it like nothing more than a thorn in her side.

The emotions felt like a freight train; even Pietro’s thoughts and worries about her were rarely this loud, this insistent. It caught her off guard. She hadn’t expected Natasha to feel such a range of emotions for her, much less constantly and with so much intensity. Their exchange of words through a door arrived and while Wanda huddled against the wall of her room, torn between trusting again and permanently pulling away, an earnest confession of ‘I love you’ died on Natasha’s lips outside.

If Wanda didn’t feel the same way, she would’ve wiped that memory from her on sight.

“Oh, Tasha…”

Something fell between the two women then, some final wall they’d both kept hidden away for some time. Wanda accepted Natasha back into her heart when truthfully, she’d never fully left. Natasha meanwhile let herself crumble: loudly, devastatingly, and so very uncharacteristically. As much as it scared her to feel this exposed, there was no one she’d rather be this way with. Her secrets were out, on display for the object of her affections to sneer at and ridicule. She was afraid, at the mercy of Wanda’s judgement, but as she thought about the woman supporting her shaking form, wide green eyes with a comforting smile, Natasha trusted Wanda to have her heart.

Wanda pulled away from her thoughts carefully, red eyes fading as she brought her other hand down to Natasha’s shoulder. At a loss for words, she could only let Natasha get it all out, rubbing her back and rocking her just like Natasha had done for her so many times. “I forgive you.” She lost track of how long they sat like that, curled in on each other atop that large bed. Internally Wanda was screaming to ask Natasha questions, wanting answers for things she needed to hear come from her mouth, not just her mind. Those could wait though; her iron grip on Wanda’s shirt gave her the feeling Natasha wasn’t going anywhere. When the cries stilled, Wanda’s back started to ache and she gently pushed Natasha back to lay down. She settled on top of her with a sigh, supporting part of her weight on her elbows so she could at least try to get a good look at Natasha. She was so quiet, her strong features relaxed and maskless. Wanda loved her like this. “What are you thinking about?”

“You,” her teeth sunk into her bottom lip and she shut her eyes tight, “How awful I was to you when I should’ve just been honest with you. What an emotionally stunted imbecile you must think I am now.” A few late tears ran down the side of her face as Natasha screwed her eyes shut, but gentle fingers wiped them away before they could hit the sheets.

“I agree, you were awful that day.” Natasha let out a rough chuckle before giving Wanda an apologetic pat on her back. “But I saw more than that,” Wanda only heard a noncommittal grunt in response and frowned. She didn’t want to fully get into it now, there were so many conversations to be had, but she needed Natasha to know how she truly saw her. “Emotions are not your strong suit, no. But you, Natasha Romanoff, are a treasure and we’ll work on it. Together.”

The corners of Natasha’s lips curved just the tiniest bit; the subtlest smile Wanda's ever seen, but she caught it. “Together sounds good.” If Wanda still wanted her, she’d accept. While she stared holes into the plush pillow beside her, a soft pair of lips met her jaw, kissing along the trail with a hum. If she was tense before, now she was a wooden plank.. Why was she being kissed now of all times? “Wanda?”

“Yes, Natasha?” She continued on without care; kisses weren’t technically new to them. They’d exchanged them before, but never like this. Until now they were more on the platonic, nurturing side- Natasha knew romantic intent when she saw it. She just didn’t know what she’d done to deserve it currently.

“I don’t- what are you doing?” Natasha finally turned to look at the woman above her, eyeing her quizzically. This was unlike her- given how deep she’d just seen Natasha’s feelings on Wanda went even after yelling and screaming at her for showing those same emotions, Natasha thought sure her night was ending with admonishment for being such a hypocritical mess. Being held and kissed was a notion Natasha had all but given up on.

Wanda cocked her head to the side, the bright smile Natasha missed so much over the past month spreading across her face. “I needed you to look at me. After my stroll through your thoughts, I got a hunch it would work.” A blush grew on Natasha’s cheeks; she had on more than one occasion wondered what Wanda’s mouth felt like in places besides her forehead. “Looks like it did.”

Her attention captured, Wanda seized the opportunity. Curious fingers dragged over the planes of the former assassin’s face, tracing the dips and curves of her nose, her eyebrows, her cheekbones- she was beautiful. She trusted her with her innermost thoughts, her reasonings, her habits, even when she was still scared to do so. Natasha was strong, persistent, protective; if she could be, Wanda could be too. “I have a secret to tell you.”

“A secret? Is it about how Steve started dying his hair because I tricked him into thinking he’s graying?”

“Nat, what- no.” Natasha was laughing and Wanda, nervous as she was, couldn’t help but laugh along too. “Stop bothering Steve, he’s nice!”

Natasha rolled her eyes, “Yeah sure, whatever. What’s the secret then?” The joke was meant to veil her anxiety. She could search Wanda’s eyes all she wanted, but she couldn’t fathom what was about to fall from above. Natasha was only barely recovering from the emotional strain of her thoughts being searched. Wanda had barely commented on what she’d seen and while she wished this was related, especially after her unveiled confession hung in the air, she’d rather swallow the loss now if Wanda wanted nothing more to do with her after tonight.

“Well it’s just that- I think…” Wanda stopped, steeling her nerves by busying her shaky hands in Natasha’s bouncy curls. She wanted to do this properly, assuredly. They were only inches apart and Wanda’s hair fully curtained them in, but Wanda whispered it anyway. “I love you, Natasha Romanoff.”

“Wanda... “ Natasha didn’t know what to say. No, that was wrong. She knew exactly what to say, what she felt so deeply, but hadn’t brought herself to express. Here Wanda was, yet again opening herself to hurt and rejection at the hands of someone who’d brought her both great joy and great pain. This time though, Natasha wouldn’t leave it one-sided. “I love you too, Wanda Maximoff.” Her hands settled on Wanda’s waist, bringing her in for a proper kiss. She wanted to savor the feel of her forever; her soft moan when they first connected, the sweet taste of her lips- Wanda was intoxicating.

When they parted, Wanda’s mouth went to Natasha’s neck, covering the pale column of her throat in small kisses that left the redhead wanting more. She pushed herself forward on her knees as she returned to the full lips she wanted to have on hers for so long and as a probing tongue snaked over her teeth, Wanda’s mind was made up. “Moya lyubov, Natasha… fuck me.”

Hesitant, Natasha pushed back, watching Wanda’s hooded eyes stare her down. “Are you sure? We’ve had such a long night already.” The last thing she wanted was Wanda waking up with regrets. She made a promise with herself to treat her properly; it would be wrong to start out by taking advantage of Wanda’s vulnerability. But Wanda shook her head with vigor, the most sure tonight she’d been in such a long time.

“I’m sure, Tasha, please.” Her hips ground against Natasha’s stomach, urging her to action. She didn’t want much, only to be held and felt and loved. Only Natasha could do that for her; the only person she wanted to do this was Natasha. She lowered her lips to her ear, biting her earlobe. “Show me how much you care about me.”

Natasha had them flipped in a second, effectively caging Wanda in. Their lips were back together instantly, but this time with a fervor. Wanda melted under Natasha’s insistence, groaning when that skilled tongue stayed to assert its dominance over the woman who was oh so eager to be taken care of. She pulled away only when she started to feel lightheaded, switching instead to suck a mark into the delicate skin of Wanda’s collarbone. Natasha’s hand slid under Wanda’s loose t-shirt, pleased to find she’d already discarded her bra for the night. Her back arched with just the most featherlight touches over her breast and Natasha smirked, “You’re being so good for me already, sweet girl.”

Wanda whined, cold air hitting her hardening nipples as Natasha forced her shirt over her head. A wet mouth caught one suddenly and Wanda nearly wept when Natasha started to suck. She was ashamed to admit she’d been more touch-starved than anticipated, having missed Natasha’s arms around her even with innocent intentions and the need to go limp with pleasure in their secure hold grew deep in her core by the minute. Natasha switched sides to give apt attention to the other breast, teasing this one with circling patterns around the sensitive nub with the tip of her tongue before descending on it like she did the first. She made use of her hands by taking the now neglected nipple in one, pinching and twisting in time with her mouth, the other hand playing with the fabric of Wanda’s lace panties.

She kept up until she had Wanda ready to practically beg for more and fuck, she loved it. Her mind raced with thoughts of her love pleading beneath her, trapped between her strong thighs and offering up anything to give her more. But that wasn’t for tonight. Right now Natasha needed to reassure her, give her everything she asked for and more so Wanda knew just how loved and wanted she was. Still, she could play a bit. “Have you thought about this before?” Natasha went in again, kissing down, down, until she reached her lower belly, content to nibble and lick wherever she found she could make Wanda’s hips buck. Her eyes locked onto the damp spot making itself known on Wanda’s panties and she groaned, pressing her nose into it just to hear Wanda yelp. “Answer me, baby.”

“I-” She couldn’t lie, she’d thought about it for months. Nights where she slept in her own room were often filled with thoughts of Natasha right where she was currently, but now it was real and they were here and she needed her mouth on her more than she’d needed anything else in her life. “Yes, I have.” Wanda chanced a glance down just in time to catch Natasha taking a slow lick over her clothed pussy, looking directly up at her to see how she reacted. She had to let her head fall back, embarrassed with the rush of wetness she felt having seen the obscene act. “Natasha, don’t tease me.”

God, she was so sweet. Natasha wanted to devour her. “Patience, Wands. I’ll give you exactly what you need.” She wiggled the last piece of clothing from Wanda’s hips, pushing them hastily down her legs to finally get a look at the cunt she was so going to enjoy claiming. One finger came to slide down her slit, gliding easily with how wet she was. “So eager.. Is this all for me, my little witch?” There was a whimpered yes and Natasha smirked in satisfaction, placing a kiss on her mound. Wanda didn’t know what made her squirm more: Natasha’s hot breath on her, betraying just how close she was, or the steady fingers exploring, touching everywhere except where she needed her. If her fingers dared near her entrance, they only dipped in for a moment. Just long enough for Wanda to think maybe she’d at least get the relief of being filled, only for it to be denied and have the cycle start all over again. Bruising kisses peppered her inner thighs, Natasha working her way up one, brushing across where Wanda needed her most and back down the other leg. “I hate to break it to you, but you look so pretty whining for me. If you think this is torture, just wait until I really have my way with you.”

Wanda was suffering. Natasha’s words shot straight for her core; she couldn’t handle any more. Her hands went to her chest, desperate for any tiny bit of relief she could control. “Natty, I need you, right now...please, please I’ll be so good,�� She felt like she was on fire, flames consuming her very being.

When Natasha finally slipped her tongue past her folds, both women let loose a groan. Wanda was soaked from her persistent teasing and her hips bucked as the pressure between her thighs grew with each passing second. Every lick was a new reaction, a new whine, mewl, whimper- Natasha should’ve known Wanda would be so responsive. Despite how cute it was, Natasha needed to keep Wanda still so she wound an arm around her thigh and pulled her down the bed, ignoring her surprised yelp and pressing her into the mattress. Tight in her grasp, Natasha pressed a long awaited kiss to Wanda’s clit, watching her head fall dramatically to the pillow. “Is it here you need me?”

“Yes! Right there! Keep going, please..!” Thankfully her request was granted, Natasha contenting herself with kitten licking the swollen bud until she took it between her lips, sucking hard specifically to see Wanda keen against her. Quickly, Natasha wondered if it was sadistic how much she loved feeling a fresh gush of wetness hit her palm knowing she alone caused it, but it was quickly replaced with the desire to see more from her. Without warning, Natasha entered her with a single finger, burying it deep. “Fuck, Natasha…”

She was having way too much fun, surely. Never before had Natasha reveled in pulling every ounce of pleasure she could from her partner. Natasha worked Wanda open carefully; she liked to play, but she wouldn’t harm her. Pleas for another finger reached her ears and Natasha willingly obliged, pressing another finger alongside the first. Silken walls tightened around her digits while her tongue laved over Wanda’s needy clit. This was heaven, it had to be. Natasha swore she’d never get tired of the taste of her lover, feeling well and truly drunk on Wanda Maximoff.

“Nat- Natty, please- don’t stop..” She was close, she could tell. Wanda’s thighs trapped her like a vice, her free hand tangling in bright red hair for fear of Natasha leaving her on such a painful edge.

Natasha broke free just long enough to take in the sight, committing this devastatingly beautiful vision of her to memory. Just in case they needed it later. “Go ahead, come for me, my love.” A few more perfectly angled thrusts, curling and twisting in just the right places, and Wanda broke. Worshipping whispers of Natasha’s name on her tongue. Natasha worked her through her high as tenderly as possible, staying pressed firmly to her sensitive cunt until Wanda weakly pushed her away. Her fingers left as she sat up, hitching Wanda’s legs around her hips. She wanted just one more thing.

“Wanda, sweetheart. Look at me.”

Wanda sleepily agreed, lids heavy as she turned to face the woman above. A gentle hand held her head and she was just about to smile at the sweet gesture when Natasha pressed her wet fingers to her barely parted lips. She opened them of course, catching on to Natasha’s request quickly. Wanda dutifully sucked at the digits pushed into her mouth, moaning submissively as the fingers moved in and out. “That’s a good girl, my good girl.” Her groan was muffled around the intrusion, but Natasha felt it vibrate on the pads of her fingers. One day soon she’d have to introduce Wanda to her strap. She removed her fingers and replaced them with her mouth; the only downside to spending so long between her legs was being apart from her sweet lips. “I really do love you, Wanda.”

“I love you too, Tasha.” Wanda rolled them onto their sides so she could wrap herself around Natasha, cuddling her tight to her body. She was so tired. Her sleep had been more than lacking for the past month, both missing Natasha and the emotional stress draining her to the point of constant exhaustion. “Can we maybe.. talk more tomorrow?” Wanda asked hesitantly, nervous for Natasha to have closed herself off by the time she woke up. She loved her endlessly and wanted to keep the time spent between them safe enough to see this version of her again.

Natasha nuzzled her nose deep into Wanda’s hair, nodding. “I’ll bring the coffee.” Being open was difficult; it would probably never come easy to her. Even now a tiny voice was clawing at her to take it all back, retreat before she gave Wanda a chance to think on it more and decide Natasha truly was monstrous to be around. A single comforting squeeze from the woman sleepily clinging to her like a koala freed her from that instinctive flight. Natasha shook her head, wiggling her fingers along Wanda’s hip where she knew she was ticklish and the muffled giggle against her chest steadied her. The emotional struggle was worth the effort. If they were going to be okay, she could handle anything. “Go to sleep, detka, you’re safe.. no nightmares.”

If Wanda wasn’t on her way to sleep, she would’ve teared up. She missed the security so terribly; her love and her safe place wrapped into one bundle of intimidating assassin who by some odd twist of fate loved hard, as much as she did her. Natasha was a keeper. “None for you either, or else I’ll sneak and take them away again.”

“Again?” The first night after her mission… there’d been no haunting playbacks of her failures, no post-task tremors she’d become accustomed to. “Wands, did you-”

“Oh no.. I’m asleep.. I can’t hear you..” she was fake snoring, snuggling impossibly deeper into Natasha’s front. Natasha scoffed, pinching Wanda’s side before throwing her favorite blanket over them both. They’d talk about it tomorrow.

“Naughty little witch.”

#wandanat #scarletwidow #wanda maximoff x natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x wanda maximoff #natasha romanoff #wanda maximoff #wandanat fic #wandanat smut #wandanat angst #natasha romanoff fic #wanda maximoff fic #natasha romanov #my writing

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lovelytaes-blog · 3 years

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House Rivals - kth (m) (teaser)

pairings: grffindor!kth x slytherin!reader

synopsis: You were the Slytherin Heir; he was Gryffindor's Pride. For centuries, your two houses never got along, despising each other, pulling crude moves on the Quidditch pitch... So can you imagine what people would think if they found out you two were hooking up?

genre: smut, fluff, little bit of angst; e2l, fwb (tae's sort of a fuckboy)

warning(s): sexual content, heavy make-out sessions, some dry humping (maybe lol), dirty talk (honestly, Tae could've been considered a Slytherin here lol, he's filthy), squirting, oral sex (f. receiving), teasing, biting, doggy, rough sex, unprotected sex (safe sex is sexy ppl!!!), cream pie, hair pulling, ass spanking, big!dicktae, swearing, fingering, begging. I think that's all, but please let me know if I missed anything!!!

word count: ~8.1k

posting: Wednesday, July 7 at 1pm CST.

notes: hiiii babes!!! I'm so excited to share my first ever hogwarts drabble with you guys. I got a litttttttle carried away with this one, because I just thought this was so much fun to write! Hopefully you enjoy this little drabble, thank you so much for all the love <3.

Your back was pushed roughly against the wall, while his lips hungrily attacked yours. Hands hastily roaming each other’s bodies as he bit your lip lightly, earning a whimper from you. You never in your life would’ve thought you’d be in this compromising position with Kim Taehyung.

It had been a year since your first encounter like this. The idiot boy was leaning up against the Whomping Willow teasing you while you were meant to be finishing up your transfiguration project. He had been meaning to take a stroll around the castle, but when he saw your pretty self on your stomach furiously writing, he knew that he just had to anger you. It has been your game for years. He liked irritating you, it was fun for him. For you, not so much, but you wouldn’t have it any other way. It was entertaining to bicker with Taehyung, call it fucked up, but your rivalry was one of the few things that you looked forward to each school year. Sometimes, it can be too much and you and Taehyung throw out words towards one another to purposely hurt the other. And that’s reminder enough on why you two cannot become anything more than rivals.

Having enough of Taehyung bothering you, you wrapped up your project, and brushed passed him only to have him grip your arm and crashed his lips upon yours. Too shocked to have done anything, you stood unmoving for a moment. He pressed you up against the willow harder, earning a shocked gasp to escape your lips. After what seemed like forever, you quickly kissed him back, him moaning into your lips. The kiss felt as if it was long overdue, he kissed with so much emotion, as if he’s been wanting to do this for a while.

And you’d be lying if you said you didn’t want it. His hands left your arms and pressed against the willow tree, pulling away from you. His eyes were full of lust and desire, and you didn’t doubt for a moment your eyes held the same gaze. Too stunned to say anything, you quickly ducked under his arm and ran inside the castle.

You would never admit it to anyone, but part of you had been wanting to become more with Taehyung, maybe even try dating. But you quickly shook that idea out of your head once the rumors started up again with his playboy image. You hated the way you were drawn to him, but you couldn’t deny the fact that there was something about him that made you want him more than just a quick hookup. You wanted to hold his hand, brush his hair away from his face to be able to look into those dark brown eyes, you wanted to hold him and be close to him whenever he felt sad.

#bts angst #bts fluff #bts smut #bts taehyung #bts hogwarts au #bts jungguk #bts jimin #bts namjoon #bts hosoek #bts jin #bts yoongi

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angellesword · 3 years

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MAGIC SHOP | JJK (13)

Description: You and Jungkook were best friends who were in love with each other. What would happen when Soojin, your half sister who you’re trying to impress, told you she’s in love with Jungkook too?

Alternatively:

“Would you believe me if I said that I was scared of everything too?”

Pairing: Architect!Jungkook x Architect!Reader

Genre: childhood best friends to lovers, family drama, angst, fluff, idiots to lovers, pining, slice of life au.

Warnings: mention of infidelity, leading to insecurity (poor Sin-ae.) manipulation, cursing, unrealistic BOD meeting lmao

Chapter’s OST: Fight Song by Rachel Platten

Word Count: 5.1k

Series: CHAPTER 12 | CHAPTER 14

It goes without saying that one should either stay away or fight those things that destroyed them.

It was long overdue and you knew it. You shouldn't have let the Kims treated you like garbage. You should've fought them the first time they violated your peace.

But no. You did none of these because for the longest time, you felt like you owed them. You felt like you had ruined their perfect family so now you were required to pay for it.

It was like you were your father's souvenir from a long trip of fucking around. A memento that reminded Sin-ae and your siblings that Taemin betrayed them.

All souvenirs had limits too though. Over time, they started to deteriorate. You felt like this was happening to you. You were no longer that pretty little thing that did whatever the Kims wanted.

You had enough; however, it didn't mean it hurt any less.

"Hey, are you okay?" You heard your name being called. You felt his hand on the small of your back before you saw his face. He was keeping you steady in place.

"Huh? Um—" You tilted your head, meeting the gaze of the person who saved you from collapsing. "Architect Jung?"

You blinked at your former co-worker, making sure that you got his name right. You hadn't seen him in years. What if you remembered his face wrong? What if he's not Jung Hoseok, the only architect in this firm who Jungkook adored?

You remembered from years ago when Jungkook pouted all day because Architect Jung announced that he would be quitting his job soon. If you remembered it correctly, your best friend even shed a tear. He really liked this mentioned architect.

Luckily, Hoseok didn't push through the resignation. Until now, he was still working at Castle. All you knew was that he didn't like working on site. He preferred guiding junior architects and working in the office.

This was why it didn't come as a surprise to you to run into him today. You were simply curious if he was really the Hoseok you knew from years ago.

He looked different. His hair was longer and his gaze was dark. The Hoseok you knew always smiled bright. What changed?

"You don't look okay. Maybe we should sit first?" Hoseok guided you towards his office room.

You took a seat on the couch, watching as Hoseok strode towards his mini fridge to get a bottle of water.

"Here..." He handed it to you after opening its cap. "Can I get you anything else?"

Hoseok sounded like a concerned big brother. There's a warm feeling in your chest because of the way he looked at you. It's as if he truly cared about your well-being.

"No. This is fine. Thank you, Architect Jung." You smiled politely at him. Sometimes you forgot that some people could show you kindness without having an ulterior motive. "You already helped me a lot. I'll probably collapsed on the floor if you didn't catch me."

You chuckled lightly. You were confused, guilty, and hurting. These mixed emotions were probably the reason why you felt like you were going to faint. You walked out of Taemin's office right after telling the Kims that you should see one another in court if they had concerns about your father's last will and testament.

You left instantly because you didn't trust yourself. What if you said the wrong things and made the situation so much worse? A part of you knew you deserved to inherit a portion of Taemin's assets despite being an illegitimate child. On the other hand, you felt like you were being unfair to your siblings for thinking this way. You took so much from them already. Wasn't it enough that you succeeded in breaking their family apart?

"Are you eating well?" Hoseok asked with concerned eyes. He was currently sitting on the couch right across you.

Architect Jung's office was spacious. It was bigger and comfier than Jungkook's space here at Castle. You wondered if it was because of his position or if it had something to do with his relationship with your father.

Your father always brought Architect Jung and Jeon with him whenever he had meetings outside Korea. The three of them were pretty close. Years ago, you actually heard Seokjin and Taemin fighting.

Your eldest brother was demanding to know why Taemin preferred the company of Hoseok and Jungkook more than his own sons. Your father was quick to defend himself, saying that Hoseok and Jungkook were architects and one of them could be his successor—the one who could help continue his legacy—unlike him and Namjoon who chose a different path.

Seokjin was wrong to drop the argument after that. He should've dug deeper. He should've questioned his father and exposed his secret.

You were not the only illegitimate child of Taemin. Hoseok was too. You found out about it on a very underwhelming day: today.

"Or are you still sulking because you didn't get to attend our father's funeral?"

You realized that some people could say mean things easily. Hoseok didn't know that his words hurt you, making you feel like you didn't have the right to feel sad about not seeing your father for the last time.

But that's not your concern at the moment. You squinted, like you're trying to see if Hoseok grew two heads.

What did he just say? Our father? Did you hear him right or were you just too emotionally drained to be conversing with other people right now?

"You get overwhelmed easily, my dear sister." Architect Jung observed with a thoughtful gaze.

You were still too stunned to speak.

"Now I'm not so sure if I should tell you all my secrets. You don't look like the person who can help me take down the Kims."

"I—I." You flinched at his words. Take down the Kims? What the fuck was he saying? "I don't understand this. Why would I want to ruin...my family?"

You cringed the second the question left your mouth. Even in your own ears, you sounded pathetic. After all this time, you still thought you're part of that family?

Maybe Hoseok wasn't the confusing one here. It's you and your stupidity.

"They're not your family." Architect Jung corrected you through gritted teeth. "Family helps each other. The Kims destroyed you and our father—"

There it was again.

You cut him off because the more he spoke, the more confused you got. Your temples were aching and suddenly, you weren't so sure if the culprit for your headache was still the Kims.

You thought Hoseok was making you feel perplexed. He seemed to understand the confusion he's bringing because he looked at you with sympathy as he picked up the folder on top of the center table, the same table separating the two of you.

"Maybe this will help you understand better." He handed you the folder.

It was as if your hand had its own life. You were already reaching for the folder before you could process what he said.

Hoseok urged you to open it and read the first page of the file.

You obliged. Lips trembling as you silently read the content. Your temples throbbed more. You had seen this same paper years ago. This was a paternity test result. You knew because Sin-ae demanded a copy of this when Taemin claimed you were his child.

"Y-You're..." Your heart was in your throat. Your face felt hot and it was difficult for you to speak.

Still, you pushed hard and asked; "you're my brother too?"

It's strange. To feel warmth in your chest.

Hoseok was your brother.

He was family.

"I am." Hoseok's jaw ticked. He swallowed before saying "I'm the eldest son of our father..."

Your hands balled into fists upon hearing that, not in annoyance but because of happiness. Finally, you felt like someone would understand what you feel. You asked Hoseok to share his life story to you, but only if he felt comfortable.

The last thing you wanted was to drive him away. Fortunately, your brother didn't mind sharing. It's not like he had a choice. Really.

This was the only way he could think of to convince you to help him make the Kims pay.

Hoseok started by telling you that his parents had a romantic relationship even when Taemin was already married to Sin-ae. Apparently, your father's legal wife had difficulty conceiving.

Taemin even thought that he and his wife would never have children. This was when he decided to be with Jung Jiwoo, Hoseok's mother. Just like your mother, Jiwoo fell into Taemin's trap.

Taemin debated if he should break up with Sin-ae after finding out that Jiwoo was pregnant. He almost did, but fate was cruel because just as when Taemin’s about to divorce his wife, he found out she was pregnant too.

Jiwoo accepted her fate. Unlike your mother, she wasn't demanding. She was content with the fact that Taemin treated Hoseok well. His eldest son was his favorite.

Things only changed when Taemin decided to form a professional corporation with his best friend Jong-in. He rarely visited Hoseok. He started prioritizing the company and his new mistress.

Jiwoo didn't mind. In fact, she even invested in the firm as well. Just like your mother, Jiwoo also saw potential in the business. She knew it would grow and become one of the best architectural firms.

Jiwoo invested for the sake of her son. She wanted him to have a good future, especially because it appeared like Hoseok was into architecture as well.

Hoseok was actually one of the first architects to work at Castle. He helped the company grow. Taemin saw the fruit of Hoseok's labor and even made a promise to make his eldest son his successor.

It was all lies though. Taemin felt guilty when Sin-ae broke down and found out about you. He realized he couldn't break her heart more so he decided not to tell his wife and children about Hoseok.

Taemin died without revealing the truth about his eldest son.

"Is that why you want to take down the Kims?" You winced after he told you the truth. "Because you hate our father? Because he didn't include you in his will?"

Your heart dropped to your stomach. How cruel. You honestly thought Hoseok was like you. You thought he just wanted to belong. To be loved...But it appeared like he was blinded by revenge.

"I don't hate our father." Hoseok scoffed, offended that you thought he was the kind of person who would bring down the people who were important to the person he hated. "He's an ass, but he loved me. I can't say for sure about you though."

Ouch.

You avoided his gaze because what he said hurt. Hoseok seemed to realize the impact of his words because his face turned pale.

"I-I don't mean it like that." He did. "I mean...I don't know." Hoseok conceded since he didn't really know what he was talking about.

He couldn't talk on behalf of his father. He could only talk about his observation.

"I think...father loved you." His voice was barely a whisper, like he was ashamed to say this to you. "Just not in the way you should be loved."

Hoseok pursed his lips. His eyes glistened with dejection.

"Because you deserve so much more, my lovely sister..."

You felt his stare through your soul. It hurt.

It hurt to think that you found someone who was going through the same thing as you. It just hurt that even when you're basically on the same page, you're still so different.

Taemin loved him more than he loved you.

But why? Weren't you deserving of his love?

"If I deserve so much more, then why do people treat me like this?" You choked back a sob.

You didn't mean to break down like this. You were so tired of appearing vulnerable in front of people. Why did it feel like they always have the upper hand?

It's not fair.

"Because you let them." Your heart broke into a thousand pieces after hearing Hoseok's response.

"So it's my fault?" You couldn't help it. Tears trickled down your face. It's like you had been slapped.

"There's no other way to put it." Hoseok was remorseful but not really. "Don't get me wrong. There's nothing wrong with you. You're full of love, I get it, but not everyone is like you. You can't expect them to be nice to you just because you're nice to them."

He paused for a second just to stare into your eyes. He looked desperate—desperate to make you understand.

"Some people...They're very entitled, you know? They feel like they can do whatever they want with you since they're conditioned to think you wouldn't mind."

You understood that, but Hoseok wasn't truthful. He was wrong to say there's nothing wrong with you.

There was.

People took advantage of you because you let them. That's your mistake.

He intended to help you correct it.

"But you have to mind it. Their horns will only grow if you don't deter them from hurting you. Before you know it, it's not just you who's getting hurt—"

Hoseok let out a deep breath.

"—it's everyone." He bit his lower lip. "Everyone is suffering because of the Kims and I want to put an end to it."

You watched as his expression hardened.

"You're the only one who can help me."

Despite Hoseok's revelation of the truth, you still didn't understand why he wanted the Kims to suffer.

He figured it's best if he showed you the evidence instead of just talking about it. Hoseok wasn't dumb. He knew you loved the Kims, especially Soojin. You might be tired of their bullshit; however, it didn't mean you would be happy to see them in pain.

Unless he gave you valid reasons.

"You think you can spare me some time? I'd like to tell you more things." Your eldest brother enquired.

You were still inside his office here at Castle. An hour had passed since he shared that he was also Taemin's son.

"Uh...yeah. I think so." Jungkook was supposed to pick you up. He told you to send him a message when you're done meeting the Kims and Taemin's executors.

You appreciated Jungkook's attempt to comfort you. He's always there to help you, but it looked like you wouldn't be able to meet with him today or any time soon. Definitely not when you had to fix so many things.

Hoseok ended up bringing you to his apartment. He showed you things you didn't even know were real.

"Here's the original copy of the documents related to the construction of the building in Myeong-dong."

You weren't sure why Architect Jung was showing you these documents when he should be handing it to the authorities. All of this information was related to the building that collapsed weeks ago. The investigation was still continuous and the management of Castle was going through a rough time.

"I know this is a lot to take in, but I'm not sure how else to convince you that I'm not the bad person here." Hoseok saw the way you looked at him when he claimed he wanted to destroy the Kims.

You didn't believe in revenge. You knew at the end of the day it's not going to be as fulfilling as what you thought it would be. What would you gain if you hurt people who hurt you?

Satisfaction? Yeah, and so? Would it change the fact that you got hurt?

"Take a look in that document. There's the original blueprint of the building. Kim Soojin designed it. She's actually the one leading the construction of the building, not our father."

The words escaping Hoseok's mouth weren't registering in your mind. Your whole attention was focused on the documents in your quivering hand.

Just like what Hoseok wanted you to do, you took a look at the document. Your brows snapped together, lips parting because of shock.

It hadn't struck you yet that the sole reason why the tragic accident happened was because of Soojin.

Accident.

By definition, an accident meant an event that happened unintentionally. Just by looking at your sister's design, you could already tell that an accident would definitely happen. Soojin was a professional. She was a licensed architect. How could she not know this wouldn't lead to death, injuries, and damages?

The building was poorly designed. It's like aesthetics were prioritized rather than safety. It's frustrating to see this. Hoseok also told you Soojin wanted the building to be constructed immediately so she designed it using inferior materials. It was easier to obtain these materials since it could be delivered the same day you ordered it.

This was unlike Soojin. She usually preferred ordering high-quality materials to the point where the budget set for her projects resulted in a deficit. She incurred a lot of cost whenever she accepted a workload.

"She's planning to join this international competition that's why she rushed the construction of the building." Hoseok explained, causing you to shake your head.

This was ridiculous. Soojin wasn't that dumb to compromise the safety of people just to win, right? She's better than that.

"I don't believe this." You practically shoved the documents back to your brother. This was a difficult pill to swallow.

You felt like everything you knew about your sister were all lies. She had a temper, yes. She was a brat, yes. But she was smart. She was a good architect. Or were you just convincing yourself?

"S-Soojin isn't like this." You wheezed, making Hoseok heave a deep sigh.

"Isn't she?"

You thought people only experienced life flashing before their eyes when they're on the brink of death, but as Hoseok asked this question to you, every memory you had with Soojin flashed in your mind, like it was telling you to not just look but see.

"But she's so kind to me." You deflated.

Hoseok looked at you with sympathy. Or was it pity? He pitied you because you were blinded by the idea of wanting to belong.

"She really did a good job manipulating you, huh?" Hoseok grimaced, wondering if he was at fault too.

He knew about you. Taemin talked about you. It's actually one of the reasons why Hoseok chose to stay at Castle. It's not simply because he had interest in becoming the next chairperson. He wanted to look after you too.

Was he too late? Why didn't he reach out to you?

"S-She did not manipulate me." Even in your own ears, you sounded pathetic. Why did you keep denying the truth? Deep down, you were sure Hoseok was right.

"She did." Your brother continued to insist. "A lot of times. You just misunderstood the meaning of manipulation because she did it so kindly."

There were two kinds of manipulation.

One was when a person used intimidation or violence to manipulate another being into doing something.

Most of the time, the people who had been coerced ended up hating the one who manipulated them.

This was the case with your mother. It took you long to admit that you hated her. For the longest time, you told yourself you loved her because at the end of the day, she was still your mother.

But she hurt you and abused you, so you started to hate her.

The other type of manipulation was when a person used kindness to get what they wanted. This was what Soojin did. She made you feel like you belonged, like she loved you—this was why you didn't hate her.

You loved her.

Acting like you’re kind was the easiest way to make people believe you're a good person. However being kind and being good were two different things. You just failed to see that.

"If you still don't believe me, then stay with me for a while. I'll show you everything you need to know."

There's something about the way Hoseok said these words that made you agree. You stayed at his place for days, refusing to go back to Jungkook's apartment no matter how many times he tried to reach you.

You couldn't afford to be distracted right now. Jungkook was a distraction. Every time you saw him, all you wanted to do was drop everything and just be happy with him.

Love shouldn't be your priority at the moment. You had to unveil the truth first.

Fortunately, you did.

Hoseok didn't stop providing evidence. You didn't know how he managed to talk to some employees who apparently knew about the real reason why the building collapsed.

Your heart was divided into two. A big part of you believed that Soojin failed and blamed her mistakes to Taemin, the other part of you still chose to trust her. This seemed to frustrate Hoseok because days after providing you legit evidence, he said he couldn't do it anymore.

"You clearly trust your sister. What if you heard the truth from her?" Hoseok furrowed his brows, irritated.

You gulped, heart beating fast.

"Okay," but you agreed because as stated, you knew deep down that evidence didn't lie.

You got what you wanted and Hoseok felt like he could finally breathe.

"You believe me now?" Your brother folded his hands over his chest. A sigh of relief escaped his lips upon seeing you nod your head at once.

The evidence you were looking for was hearing the truth coming from Soojin. You heard her admit the truth when she and Sin-ae were at the columbarium.

"There's nothing holding you back this time?" He pressed.

You nodded again, this time, you were more determined as you clenched your fist and gritted your teeth.

"Nothing..."

This was the story that unfolded days ago. Right now, you were standing behind Hoseok here at the conference room in Castle.

Everyone anticipated your move. They watched you deliver that shocking news. It was oddly satisfying—to watch the surprise staining their face.

Sin-ae clearly wanted to lash out on everyone, unfortunately she couldn't use the 'this is impossible' card because before she could even breathe, the evidence was provided to every person in the meeting.

Mr. Han and the other shareholders had a smug look on their faces. They weren't bothered that Hoseok wasn't carrying Taemin's last name. What's important to them was that now they had a better option.

Anyone was obviously better than having Soojin as the next chairperson.

"H-How do we know you didn't fabricate the result?" Sin-ae desperately groaned as she glared at Hoseok. This was bad. So fucking bad. "My husband is dead!"

Your father's wife was arguing that Taemin was cremated. She firmly believed that the result had been tampered.

This belief of hers had been shattered when Namjoon interjected the conversation. He stood up, gaze focused on his wailing mother. Sin-ae was hurt. Of course she was. She just found out that her late husband cheated on her more than once.

She couldn't help but wonder if there's something wrong with her. Just like you, she was insecure. Wasn't she enough?

"The result is not fabricated, mother." Namjoon started. Eyes so soft that it broke Sin-ae more. "Architect Jung Hoseok is my father's son too. I helped prove it."

Your eyes widened upon hearing that. Shit. You thought you're the only one who had revelation to make today. Who would have thought that one of your siblings would do something like this?

"Hoseok-hyung and I requested a sibling DNA test. The file in front of you will show you the result."

"If Mr. Jung Hoseok is also entitled to legitime, shouldn't you be discussing this in court?" One of the shareholders raised his concern.

You turned to that shareholder.

"You don't have to worry about that, Mr. Kang. My brother's share in our father's estate has been settled. I transferred my shares in this company to him."

"You did not!" Soojin seethed after a long moment of silence on her part. She was glaring at you like you betrayed her.

It used to crush your soul, but seeing her today didn't make you feel anything. You stared back at your sister impassively.

Her face was crimson, eyes growing big and hands balling into fists. She looked like she could kill you.

"She did." Hoseok interjected, shooting your sister a taunting smile. Hoseok was seated right across Soojin. He could see her nostrils flaring. "I am this firm's major shareholder. Right, Architect Jeon?"

It was made known to everyone in this room that Jungkook sold his share to Hoseok. This only drove Soojin and her mother more vexed.

They were seeing red.

Soojin started throwing things. She angrily pushed all things she saw on the long table, shouting and blaming you for ruining her chance to become the next chairperson.

"Bold of you to assume you still have a chance to run this firm when you're nothing but trash." You surprised yourself when you said this.

Soojin too. Sin-ae, Seokjin, and basically everyone gaped at you. Your blank face was all they saw though. You were getting bolder now. It wasn't easy, but you found courage every time you thought about the bereaved families of the victims of Soojin's incompetence.

"What did you just say to me?" Her face flushed, heartbeat increasing because of hatred and disbelief. She wanted to scratch your face and drag you to hell.

You were a fucking bitch.

"Don't play dumb with me, Kim Soojin. You know what I'm talking about." Your shoulders squared as you lifted your chin. "Or would you rather I show everyone in this room the evidence you thought you already got rid of?"

For a second Soojin looked like she had a smart retort, but her face turned white when she heard your question.

It's the same expression she had when she saw you at the columbarium many days ago. Fear was never a good look on Soojin. Because unlike you, she wasn't used to feeling this way.

She always won, always got what she wanted. But not this time.

Definitely not this time.

"What is this all about?" Mr. Kang puckered his lips, unamused as he stated his opinion. He said he didn't have time for family drama.

"This isn't drama, Mr. Kang. This issue concerned all of you." You didn't waste any more time. "Castle is going through a rough time now because of the accident that occurred in Myeong-dong. I know the investigation is still on-going and we're all tensed as to how this will affect us, especially because you all believe the culprit is my father. But—"

"No!" Soojin and her mother tried to stop you, but the shareholders were done with them. They said they'd kick out Soojin and Sin-ae if they didn't act professionally.

This was a corporate meeting. It didn't take a genius that one should be in their best behavior.

You continued.

"The building collapsed not because of Kim Taemin but because of Architect Kim Soojin. She led the construction of it. I have here all the written evidence." You nodded your head at your father's former secretary, silently asking to flash the evidence on the projector. Some employees proceeded to hand out the same copy of documents Hoseok showed you before, the one that would prove that your claims were real.

"And before you accused us of fabricating the results, well then, it won't be warranted. We have corroborated with the employees who worked with Architect Kim Soojin regarding this construction. They were bribed with money, but through persuasion, we have convinced them to take the moral high ground."

You elucidated that these coerced employees were willing to take the stand during Soojin's trial—yes, after all she had done, you were certain that Castle and the law would hold her accountable.

It's evident by the way the shareholders and the board reacted with the news. They still gave Soojin an option though: either go to the station on her own or the management would be forced to call the authorities right now.

"She'll turn herself in." It wasn't Soojin who decided this. It was Seokjin. Your brother was looking at you as he said this.

His face was void of any emotion. It caused your heart to skip a beat, wondering if Seokjin hated you even more now.

He didn't speak during the meeting. He remained frozen on his spot, just sternly watching the scene unfold in front of him. Another thought popped inside your head: did he know about Hoseok too? Namjoon did.

"What are you saying, oppa!? I'm not—” Soojin protested but Seokjin shook his head, wrapping his arms around your sister's shoulder and pulling her into his chest.

Seokjin whispered something to Soojin. No one heard it except your sister and probably Sin-ae who was standing close to her children.

Whatever Seokjin said to your sister worked because she stopped trembling and protesting. She stayed close to him though, face still buried on Seokjin's chest.

The vice chairperson was talking to Seokjin, probably about the criminal case. You watched as Hoseok and Namjoon joined the conversation. There were other shareholders trying to pry more information out of the Kims.

You were on the far corner of the room, observing them.

The conversation went on for about five minutes before you saw Seokjin walking away, gently holding his sister's hand and taking her with him.

Namjoon and Sin-ae followed them. Your brother spared you a glance.

You shuddered at his stare even though it's not cold. It's the usual way Namjoon looked at you, no emotion but like...he knew something you didn't. It always made you uncomfortable.

Even until now.

Luckily, Jungkook was here to make it all better. You felt his hand wrapping around your shoulder tightly. Just like what Seokjin did to Soojin, your best friend pulled you closer to him.

Your knee jerk reaction was to lean your head against his shoulder.

Jungkook smiled sincerely even though you couldn't see his face. You watched Namjoon walk away as Jungkook whispered "it's going to be okay, Tiger," in your ears.

His voice was so soft and gentle that you were compelled to believe that yes, everything will be okay soon.

this chapter is inspired by the quote I saw somewhere: if you demonized the demons, you’re the demon.

Ah. Two chapters left! How do we feel? I was shocked to see your reactions from the last chapter! The twist there is written on a whim 😭 I hope I didn’t disappoint you with this update! 🥺

I haven’t edited this. Please don’t mind the errors.

#jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #jungkook x reader #jungkook x y/n #jungkook x you #armywriterssupport #jungkook romance #jungkook series #jungkook fic #jjk #bts jeon jungkook #jungkook best friend #best friend jungkook #jungkook best friends to lovers #jungkook friends to lovers

128 notes · View notes

sevenmikento · 3 years

Note

Eeee good! I've had this brain rot in my head since I realized I had a crush on Kageyama v.v

But like, a sweet/angst kinda thing where Kageyama might have had a crush on you in high school but he just couldn't process it. So graduation happens, everyone's personal growth into adulthood happens and you stay close as friends. But there's a moment when Kageyama asks if you'd be willing to catch up. Of course you say yes he's your friend. And it's then Kageyama just blurts out that he's always liked you. He feels stupid it took him this long but your the one thing that always felt off when he was traveling an becoming a part of the Schweiden team. Anyways I'm sorry this is wordy and stupid you don't have to do it or anything I just have Kageyama brain rot >.<

Love your stuff,

Jujutsu Curses ❤❤❤❤❤

A/N: *rises from the grave* HELLO!! i finally have the time and energy to write and i shall begin with this banger of a request uwu Kageyama was legit my first haiku love and i wanna kith his forehead thank u

@tobios-housewife

genres: fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, happy ending!!; 2.1k words

a long time [Kageyama Tobio X Reader]

He can’t help but fiddle with the half-empty mug sitting in front of him, his eyes darting over to the front door of the cafe every few seconds as he taps his foot on the ground. The rapid pace of his tapping is rivalled only by the wild thumping of his heart.

Kageyama Tobio glances at the entrance of the establishment once more, catching a stranger staring at him from the corner of his eye. They glare and his foot stops automatically—the awareness that was required of him is something he did not possess in his growing years and even now, as an accomplished adult, the instinct to abide by society’s unwritten social rules still catches him off guard sometimes.

He lifts the mug to his lips and takes a short sip of the piping hot beverage. You’d texted him that you were going to be slightly late and yet he couldn’t help but purchase his usual order first, the anxiety of what he’d set out to do today too much to handle without something—anything—to fiddle with. Of course, he has his volleyball in his gym bag but he knows he’ll only receive odd stares if he resorts to randomly touching it while waiting for you.

The athlete wonders—the racing of his mind akin to that of when he’s in a heated match—if he would be aware of such social nuances had it not been for your presence in his life.

You were—and honestly still are—a force to be reckoned with; someone he never imagined befriending in high school and yet you’d walked right into his life (and his heart), took a seat and never left.

“You’re good at that,” you said, watching from the entrance of Karasuno’s volleyball gym. It was nothing he hadn’t heard before.

As the ball bounced away from the toppled-over plastic bottle on the other side of the net, all he could do was stare at the ground near your feet, speechless. He wasn’t expecting anyone to come in on a Sunday, let alone talk to him out of nowhere.

“You’re supposed to say ‘thanks’, you know?” you told him in a tone that he knew was supposed to be lighthearted.

“Why?” he replied anyways, not sure how he should have responded to your joke.

You laughed and while Kageyama felt that he should have been insulted to some degree, instead, he found himself smiling.

Thinking back, he only now realises it was a smile of relief; you weren’t frustrated or annoyed by his dry and awkward reply, although it would’ve been understandable if you were (especially as the two of you were still teens) but you weren’t and he appreciated it.

He still appreciates it.

“No, dude, it’s 65 because of the ‘x’ here, see? It would be 127 if it had been there instead, though,” you pointed at the parts of the painfully long equation as you spoke, “so it’s not like you don’t know how to calculate it, you were just careless.”

It was 1:30am and his eyelids felt heavy but you were still helping him with his work as if you’d just arrived at his house not a few minutes ago when, in reality, you’d been here for nearly 7 hours. Kageyama’s brain felt fuzzy from exhaustion and yet he found himself hanging onto your every word, absorbing as much information as he could—it was the least he could do.

“Honestly,” you said out of the blue as he reworked the equation, “I think you’ll be getting mostly Bs and some As by graduation.” You smiled like it was solely his own effort; as if it wasn’t you who agreed to tutor him for free, coming by his house and sleeping over when it got too late to go home. You looked at him with your tired eyes and messy hair with such pride that Kageyama himself was nearly deluded into thinking he put in nearly as much effort as you did explaining concepts and breaking down questions in ways he could easily understand.

That night, in that exact moment, his chest swelled with an overwhelming sense of adoration and gratitude and yet all he could do was glance down at the scattered papers on his bedroom floor and mutter a soft, “thank you”.

[11:32AM] (Y/N): i’m a few minutes away! sorry for being late D:

[11:32AM] Tobio: okay :) no worries, i haven’t been here long anyways

It’s easy to lie a little sometimes, though he struggles with it when it comes to you. Kageyama feels—knows—that he owes at least that much to you; to always tell you the truth. So, instead, he twists his own truth so that the words he says or the messages he sends you are never dishonest.

He’s been in this cafe for nearly half an hour. Some might say that’s a long wait, hell, he would say it’s a long wait had it been for anyone else. However, for you, he’d actually arrived twenty minutes early in order to get that one spot you used to love so much when you were still in Karasuno together.

Kageyama has been waiting for thirty minutes but twenty were his own and ten were for you. So, no, he didn’t lie. He hasn’t been waiting long at all.

Ten minutes is nothing compared to the one year he’d spent away from you, after all.

“Are you sure you won’t miss me?” you joked, voice lighthearted as always whenever you weren’t to be taken seriously—he knew that—and yet, when your question prodded at his heart in ways he did not expect, his reaction came out far more aggressive than he’d intended it to be.

“No, why will I? I’m finally achieving my dreams. I don’t need you to be there to hold my hand.”

The moment the words slipped out of his mouth, Kageyama wanted nothing more than to take them back, to swallow them whole and leave them away from you, festering inside his soul. The guilt and shame ran down his spine from the back of his neck, burning hot as the sensation spread across his skin, leaving goosebumps in its wake.

Staring at his half-packed luggage, he didn’t need to look at you to know how hurt you were by his reply. He didn’t have to steal a glance of your face to have known exactly what expression you had on—it was the worst kind. The teary eyes and shaky frown; it was the exact same kind of face that, in the past, had led him to throwing a couple of punches at the people who’d caused you to make it.

If he could have punched himself to make it up to you, he would’ve.

Instead, Kageyama allowed a silence to fall over the room and you, as always, since the very beginning of your friendship, broke it for him.

“I was kidding, y’know?” you laughed and he played along, heart still pounding from the terrifying aspect of losing you. He thought that if he just followed your lead and pretended that things were okay, they would become okay. But even then, he knew that wasn’t going to be the case.

The day after, when he was to leave Miyagi for Tokyo for a year to train with the Schweiden Adlers, you didn’t show up to bid him farewell like you said you would. Instead, you dropped him a text apologising for your absence and wishing him all the best.

Since then, you’ve had regular video calls with him once he’d settled down in the big city with his new team. Kageyama had apologised for his words during your first call—having found it much, much easier to do so when you weren’t physically together, and you happily forgave him. He knows you aren’t, and have never been, the petty kind but part him wishes you hadn’t so easily accepted his apology when it was so long overdue.

“Hi, Tobio!” you greeted, slightly out of breath, as you took the seat opposite him, your sudden presence sending his brain into haywire. He’d spent countless nights imagining how this reunion would feel after a year of not seeing you in the flesh but now as he’s living this moment, he realises none of the numerous scenarios he played in his head can do this feeling justice.

He feels his face start to heat up as his heart pounds loudly within the confines of his chest, the thumping pulse sounding so clear in his head that he genuinely worries you might be able to hear it, too, despite being an arm’s length away. Kageyama feels himself begin to sweat in spite of the cold weather. His eyes dart down to the half-filled mug in his hands as he presses his palms against its curved, cooling surface.

“Oh, wow, are you sure you didn’t wait long?” you laughed lightly, looking at the contents of his cup. He practically feels his blush deepening at the thought of being caught redhanded for his white lie. “So, how’ve you been?”

Kageyama responds accordingly, sharing his experiences with the Schweiden Adlers and adjusting to life in Tokyo. You, in return, talk about a new apartment you’re renting with your cousin and the classes you’re teaching as a part-time substitute in Karasuno while you ponder over what to pursue as a proper career.

Conversation with one another comes surprisingly easy to the both of you. Though neither of you admit it out loud, it feels as though you haven’t been separated for twelve straight months. You chat for hours, sometimes getting a little too loud and worked up, much to the chagrin of the other customers. Slowly but naturally, the topics eventually begin to run out and you opt to sit in silence for a bit, eating your respective lunches as you people-watch.

Kageyama checks his phone and realises he needs to leave soon if he were to make it to the stadium in time to meet his teammates. The Adlers are playing a casual match against a local university team in the evening due to the two coaches being alumni or something along those lines. It’s the only reason why he’s returned to Miyagi for a short bit—

He looks at you as you gaze out the window, a content smile on your face.

—it’s the only reason…

… Right?

“No, why will I? I’m finally achieving my dreams. I don’t need you to be there to hold my hand.”

The words from his past echo in his head, piercing his heart with the same intense guilt and shame from all those months ago when he first uttered those words out of impulse born from his insistence on denying the truth of your relationship.

It’s then you look at him curiously, as if sensing the distress he’s suddenly placed himself in. You part your lips, undoubtedly to ask if he’s okay, but before you can speak, his large, warm hands reach out to engulf your own. Taped fingers and calloused palms grip at your hands firmly, holding onto you as if letting go meant never seeing you again.

“(Y/N), I love you.” he declares, staring straight into your widening eyes. The desire to look away is almost too strong to resist but he pushes himself to maintain the contact, not allowing himself to repeat his past mistakes. “While I was away, I’ve come to realise how much you truly mean to me. You have always been an important person in my life but I’ve never had the courage to tell you. I even hurt you before I left and I still haven’t forgiven myself for that even though you have.

“To be honest, while I’ll always be grateful for it, I do not need you to hold my hand as you’ve done when we were growing up,” he continues, not giving you any chance to get a word in (not that you want to yet, anyway), “but I do want you in my life. I know it’s selfish of me to ask you to be with me as I achieve my dreams but maybe, if we’re together, I can support you in discovering what you would like to pursue as well.”

He takes a deep breath, face tinted red as he tightens his grip on your hands.

“What I’m saying is… will you… do you…” Kageyama’s eyes begin to flicker towards the table and away from your face. But when you pull your hands out of his just to grab them once more and give them a reassuring squeeze, his head freezes in place, eyes staring intently into your own teary ones.

You reply, saying exactly what’s on his mind, word-for-word, “I love you and I’d love to live with you in Tokyo.”

#haikyuu #haikyuu!!#hq #haikyuu x reader #kageyama tobio #kageyama tobio x reader #kageyama x reader #imagines #scenarios #fluff #angst #happy ending #hurt/comfort

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mysticpetals · 3 years

Text

Farewell, sunshine

𝙋𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜: Jake × f!mc (Syianne)

𝙂𝙚𝙣𝙧𝙚: angst, a sprinkle of fluff

𝙒𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩: 4.9k (oof)

𝙎𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮: All Jake ever wanted was to find his sister and protect the person who had helped him more than anyone. Only, he slowly began to realise that bringing Syianne into this had caused more harm than good.

𝙒𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨: mentions of blood, physical attack, violence, hospitals, medical coma, panic attack.

𝙋𝙧��𝙢𝙥𝙩𝙨: Anonymous asked: 5. “Wake up! Please wake up.” MC and Jake finally get to meet for the first time, but everything is heavily dipped in angst. 😂 Also I adore your writing and keep up the good work!

Anonymous asked: Can you give us the most angsty jealous filled over protective short with Jake x MC i want all the ANGST to be seeping out of my screen

@mnrangera asked: Here's a nice angsty scenario for you: MC is in Duskwood continuing their investigation but is caught out in town after dark. They are on the phone with Jake when they are attacked by the Man Without a Face like Jessie was.

𝙉𝙤𝙩𝙚𝙨: I know this has been LOOOOONG overdue and I apologise for the wait. Thank you to all my followers for being patient, especially those who sent the requests in. I hope the long wait is worth it and you enjoy it. Also, please read the warnings before proceeding, I don't want any of you to be triggered by something I wrote. There may be inaccuracies in how I progressed medical conditions and general working of the hospitals so I apologise for that. Please do not repost or translate this fic anywhere else!! I'm literally begging you, please don't ruin my hard work like this. I would love if I could get some sort of feedback, whether it be reblogs or comments or just anon asks. I've tried to improve my writing and I hope it shows a little in this. This is my Christmas and New Year present all wrapped in one! I hope you all have a great 2021 <3

It was a cold, winter evening with the sky painted in a plethora of warm colors and Jake felt like finally things were going his way.

He, along with Syianne, had been working tirelessly for the past few weeks to find out what happened to Hannah. They had faced a lot of challenges along the way, with cryptic diary entries and threats directed towards them and their loved ones, but still, they'd prevailed and spent every ounce of free time, getting more information about Hannah's perpetrator.

They finally had the facts about what happened the day she was kidnapped and only the identity of the criminal was hidden. Syianne had suggested that she should go to Duskwood to try and find the last puzzle piece, to which Jake had been a little apprehensive. She argued that the rest of the group had already been through enough, with getting stalked and receiving threats and insisted that she should be the one to carry out her search in secret.

She never once asked for him to come along because she knew how dangerous it would be for him and she didn't want him to get caught. Jake was instantly warmed by the thought that someone cared so much about him, to think of his well being first.

So that night, as she called him to update him on her findings and plan after she went to Duskwood, he found himself speaking his thoughts impulsively.

"What if I came too?"

There was silence on the other end and Jake thought he might have overstepped or made it weird but she answered before he could stammer an apology.

"I'd like that. But only if you're comfortable and safe."

She told him to ruminate on it for a while and bid him goodnight. Jake thought about whether it was a logical thing to do. If Syianne planned to go undercover, he couldn't very well let her go into the lion's den alone. So he made up his mind and texted Syianne to let her know.

Jake [10:46 pm]

I'll come to Duskwood too.

Is it okay if we don't meet straight away?

I...I don't think I'm ready yet.

Syianne [10:47 pm]

I was lowkey hoping you'd say that ahaha

And of course! Take as much time as you need :)

That night, he slept with a smile on his face, excitement churning in his stomach.

⊱⋅ ──────────── ⋅⊰

Syianne was looking forward to her trip to Duskwood.

She knew it was a potentially dangerous situation and she was only going there to investigate but knowing that Jake might be there too, sent a spark of thrill through her body. They had been speaking non-stop for the past few weeks and she really liked talking to him. His answers to questions about him or his life were adorably confusing and Syianne realized that she really wanted to get to know him, be his friend or possibly something more, if their flirty banter was anything to go by.

Her bag contained all the essentials she could need, along with a sketchbook and pencils to use in case of boredom. She couldn't leave Matrix with any of her friends as they were either busy or allergic to cats so her only option was to take her along.

She had never booked a flight so fast. Knowing she would have to take a car from the airport to the rest of the way to Duskwood did nothing to damper her excitement. She couldn't wait to meet everyone once they found Hannah, some more so than the others.

The trip was nothing eventful, just a lot of travelling and it made Syianne a little tired but the idea of meeting her friends and finally putting a stop to all this madness, made her keep going. She wouldn't admit it if you asked her but she was looking forward to possibly seeing Jake as well. She knew he might not be comfortable enough to meet her yet and she completely respected that, but the thought still lingered.

She checked in to the only hotel Duskwood had, not meeting the receptionist's - Lilly's - eyes and was eternally grateful that she had only leaked her number and not her photo in that video. It would have been much more difficult to move about Duskwood, if that were the case.

The room they had was pretty basic, but not too bad for a few nights. Matrix prowled around the room, getting herself comfortable in the new environment while Syianne slowly unpacked the few clothes and necessities she brought.

In the corner of her mind, there was the thought that Jake might be staying at this hotel too and that sent a shiver of excitement down her spine. But she was a woman of her word and would wait until Jake was ready and would not try to look for him.

She had a mission here and she wanted to be damn sure that that's what she would be focusing on and save Hannah.

⊱⋅ ──────────── ⋅⊰

Jake was supposed to be in Duskwood about two nights ago.

He had encountered some issues with removing his tracks from the internet, as well as trying to find a safe way to drive to Duskwood without exposing himself. Working as a hacker did have some benefits and finally he managed to find a guy who made him three fake number plates that he would interchange every once in a while, so his whereabouts couldn't be traced.

He had let Syianne know of the unexpected delay but to his surprise, she was enjoying herself in Duskwood. She had told him that Jessy gave her a virtual tour of the town once and she was excited to explore all those places in person. She talked to him at night, describing the beauty of the small town and Jake felt himself growing wistful, wondering what they could do together if he had been there. But then again, hadn't he said that he wouldn't show himself right now? He was cautious - just as he had been all his life - but something about Syianne just made him want to let his guard down, to just be selfish for once.

He had no time to think further on it because finally, all the preparations and precautionary measures were done and he could drive to Duskwood. He couldn't leave Glitch at home because he had attachment issues and couldn't go without Jake for a long period of time. So he ushered him into his carrier and told him he could claw all the wood he wanted when they reached their destination and Glitch meowed in agreement. He had always been a smart cat, after all.

Changing the number plates every hour was exhausting, especially when he didn't do much manual work but he endured it, if it meant he was one step closer to finding his sister.

When he finally reached Duskwood, he was in awe of how normal it looked, how silent; how someone who didn't know that a girl had been kidnapped would think of this place as the perfect getaway. But he knew better, didn't he? This town held dark secrets, secrets that people weren't willing to acknowledge and he was going to expose them for what they were, no matter what it took.

Signing into the Duskwood hotel was as awkward as he imagined it to be, his half sister having no idea who he was and looking at his dark, baggy clothes suspiciously. He wasn't blaming her, he would have probably done the same if a strange man came out of nowhere to stay in Duskwood of all places. Lilly gave him a tight smile as he picked up his bag and key and made way to his room.

Syianne had texted him earlier that day that she would be checking out the lake in the evening, where Jessy was attacked. Jake was against it from the start but he should have known how stubborn she could be and eventually, he had to agree but only on the condition that she stays on video call with him the whole time. Syianne was evidently bewildered by his request, judging by the way she kept writing and erasing her reply but after a while, she managed to ask if he would be comfortable with that. Jake's heart warmed at her considerate words, never really having anyone who would care about his emotions, he was always surprised when Syianne said something like that. He replied that he would just turn off his camera or point it at the lamp or something but he had to be sure about her safety.

And that's why, he was sitting with his phone in front of him in the evening, camera turned off as he watched her fondly, pointing out the strange birds she saw.

"Ah, I wish you were here! The lake is so pretty this time and the light from sunset is reflecting off the water and it makes an amazing view," she said, voice breathy with the exertion of walking for a while and a tone of awe towards the scene in front of her.

"That's sufficient sightseeing, don't you think?" Her voice suddenly took a serious note and Jake straightened up in his chair. He was afraid but couldn't say anything. He had already agreed to let her go with a condition and he feared if he asked her to not investigate, she would probably end the call and keep looking for clues by herself. At least on the phone, he could look at her surroundings and made sure no one sneaked up on her.

"If you say so," he said half-heartedly, glancing at the surroundings behind her as she narrowed her eyes at his dismissive tone.

The next twenty minutes were spent with Syianne looking around the lake and Jake looking over her shoulder virtually. She had scouted the edge and went a little deeper into the forest, looking for a car, a boat, a mask - anything, really - but the search had proved to be futile so far. Everything was as peaceful as ever, no signs of any disturbance and it made Jake a little antsy. Nothing was ever this perfect.

"Well, since we can't find anything here, I think you should come back. It's getting late," Jake said, looking at the already darkened sky. It was an ominous red color and Jake was getting more and more worried as people left the lakeside.

Syianne frowned but didn't argue and that made him sigh in relief.

"Yeah, you're right. No use trying to find something that isn't there," she said and started walking again.

"Wait, you walked here? Didn't you bring your car?" Jake asked and she shook her head.

"Nope, I wanted to enjoy Duskwood and being in a car wouldn't have helped," she smiled at the camera and Jake let out an almost inaudible sigh. Why couldn't she care about her safety a little more? She was going to give him grey hair before he reached his thirties, that was for sure.

As he began to reply to her, he caught movement from the left side of the screen and instantly grabbed his phone, expanding the background.

There was a silhouette of a hand.

"Syianne, run!" He shouted, as the figure's arm came into view and she looked back in surprise before starting to sprint, the camera shaking from her movements.

Jake scrambled to get his car keys, not bothering with what he was wearing and ran towards the hotel parking, getting into his car and connecting the GPS to his phone, all the while listening to Syianne's panting breaths as she ran away from the man without a face.

Getting her location was no problem for him and he just hoped he would arrive there on time.

"Jake, I'm scared. I'm hiding behind a big building and I think he went on ahead," she whispered, voice shaky and trembling and Jake's hands gripped the steering wheel tightly as he glanced over at his phone to watch her looking around herself in a panic.

Five more minutes and he would reach her location. Jake had never been more thankful that Duskwood was a small town and the hotel wasn't so far away from the lake.

"I'm coming, Syianne. Just a little while more and we'll go back together."

"Okay, I think I'm safe for now," she said. There was a sound of slow careful footsteps as Syianne came out from behind the building.

The abrupt sound of a gasp almost made him lose control of the steering wheel and he increased his speed as he heard what sounded like a scuffle. Syianne had probably dropped her phone because it only showed the dark sky and sounds of her struggling against her attacker.

"No! Let–"

Jake let out a harsh breath, jaw tightening as he heard Syianne's scream. He drove straight for a bit and turned the next corner and saw the man trying once again to restrain her. His eyes saw red and he honked and honked like it was nobody's business, speeding towards them.

The man without a face seemed to have realised that someone was coming to help as he pushed Syianne roughly into the wall and ran away towards the forest. As much as Jake wanted to go after him, Syianne was his first priority and he quickly got out of the car, dashing towards her crumpled form, lying on the ground.

He fumbled with his phone, calling the local police and asking for an ambulance, his body shaking all the while, as he knelt down next to Syianne.

He felt tears welling in her eyes as he looked at her battered form and realised that she was bleeding.

"Syianne?" He spoke in a scared voice.

"Syianne!" He said more forcefully, repeatedly patting her face in hope she'll look at him but her eyes were still glassy and unfocused as if she couldn't comprehend anything.

"I'm...so sorry. I…" her voice trailed off as she struggled to breathe and Jake cried, seeing her in so much pain, when he couldn't do anything except wait for the ambulance to arrive.

After a moment, Syianne's eyes fluttered closed and Jake's panic rose to new heights.

"No, no, no! Wake up! Please wake up!" He shouted and begged but she didn't respond to his calls.

His hand was soaked in her blood from where he was applying pressure on the wound at her side. The blood hadn't stopped flowing and Jake was worried that she was losing too much, too soon.

"What do I do? What do I do?" He muttered to himself, adrenaline coursing through his veins, with only one thought in his head – to save her.

He heard sirens in the distance and was relieved to know that help was coming. He pushed up the fallen hood of his jacket up on his head and looked at Syianne for any signs of consciousness. Her breaths were shallow and eyes still closed.

Soon enough, paramedics rushed to the scene and immediately started tending to Syianne's wounds. Jake felt as if he was just a spectator, not being able to do anything but watch. Someone came up to him and started asking him questions, about how he found her, who he was to her and if he knew anything about the attack. He answered all the questions as carefully as he could, giving a fake name, because he still wasn't sure if the police department was in league with the kidnapper or not.

As soon as he was done with the questioning, a paramedic approached him, letting him know that they were taking Syianne to the hospital and he would have to come there for a bit of paperwork. Jake hesitated and said he'd drive there in his own car and the paramedic nodded in response and left.

He got in his car and put his head in his hands, shaking at the unfortunate turn of events. This wasn't how it was supposed to go. Syianne was just going to check out the lake and then surprise her friends the next day by telling them she'd be here for a few days and enjoy Duskwood together.

Jake was even thinking of meeting her in person and telling her that she had changed his life for the better. But his cowardice, his meticulous nature to not let anyone know who he was or where he was might have cost Syianne her life tonight. Even thinking about it had tears pooling in his eyes and he took a deep breath to bite back the sobs that were threatening to break once again.

He felt guilty, so so guilty and couldn't bring himself to start the car. He was pretty sure that if – no when – Syianne woke up, she would want nothing to do with the man who put her life in danger. With that thought rooted in his mind, he opened his phone and with trembling hands, sent Jessy a text about Syianne's accident. He received a reply almost immediately.

Jessy [8:46 pm]

What?

How did she come here?

You know what? If she's not okay, I'm going to hunt you down and make you pay.

Jake had no trouble believing she was telling the truth. All he wanted to do was help and now everything was falling apart. Taking a deep but shaky breath, he started the car but instead of going to the hospital, he turned towards the hotel.

⊱⋅ ──────────── ⋅⊰

Jessy had no trouble believing that the hacker was telling the truth. His texts were frantic and he practically begged her to go to the hospital to see Syianne. She had no idea how she got here, but hearing that she got attacked, just like she was, was enough to make her worry and drive to the hospital, after letting Cleo know. She figured that the rest of them deserved to know too.

She rushed to the front desk, breathless and worried, and one of the nurses told Jessy that the doctors were with Syianne and she'd have to wait until they were done to know how she was.

After some time of relentless pacing, Cleo arrived and Jessy filled her in on everything that the hacker told her, which wasn't much, but it gave them a good idea of what had happened. Cleo said that she hadn't told anyone else yet and that they should do so as soon as the doctors had an update on Syianne's condition.

About an hour later, a nurse came upto Jessy and Cleo, asking if they knew Syianne and upon their confirmation, led them to the room she was kept in. They weren't allowed to enter yet as the doctors were still in the room, but Jessy gasped when she saw Syianne's scratched up face, with bandages covering her head.

"Oh my gosh." Cleo breathed and Jessy felt a rush of sorrow as she averted her eyes.

The doctors after completing their examination, told them that Syianne was stabbed in the side but luckily it didn't puncture anything important and they closed up the wound to allow it to heal. What was more concerning, was the fact that she was hit on the back of her head.

"She most likely suffered from a concussion, in which case, it is of the utmost importance that the patient doesn't fall asleep," the doctor said and Jessy and Cleo looked at each other uneasily.

"But Syianne fell asleep…" Jessy began and the doctor gave her an apologetic smile.

"That's right. She was unconscious when she was brought here. The superficial wounds are taken care of, we just don't know when she'll wake up."

Both of them were too stunned to say anything and a call for the doctor from one of the nurses broke them out of their stupor.

"So, she's in a coma?" Cleo asked.

The doctor hesitated before answering.

"Essentially, yes. But we can't know for sure without further observation. If the injury isn't severe she'll wake up soon, we just have to monitor her constantly and look for any changes." He then walked off when his pager went off, most likely to see another patient.

"Don't worry, Jessy. She'll wake up soon," Cleo said, placing a hand on her shoulder, as they looked into Syianne's room, seeing her sleeping peacefully, as if nothing was wrong and she was just taking a nap.

⊱⋅ ──────────── ⋅⊰

As soon as she got home from the hospital, Jessy sent out a row of furious texts to the hacker, clouded by her anger and hopelessness. In her head, it was all his fault that Syianne was twittering between life and death. He was the one who asked her to come to Duskwood without letting any of them know, which caused her to be in such a terrible condition.

Everything was crumbling.

They were a tight knit group, always there for each other but when did it turn into a nightmare, Jessy didn't know. Emotion overtook her and she suddenly collapsed against the wall, keeping a hand on her mouth to muffle her sobs, and cried.

She cried for Hannah, who she had no idea whether she was alive or not. She cried for Syianne, who had become such a great friend to her. Most importantly, she cried for her relationship with everyone, that was slowly but surely, withering away.

⊱⋅ ──────────── ⋅⊰

Jake had been pacing in his hotel room ever since getting back, waiting on a word from Jessy. Glitch watched him with big eyes, as he stubbed his on the bedside and cursed. Sighing in defeat, Jake realised that it won't do any good to worry himself to death, but that didn't mean that his mind didn't drift off to the earlier scene.

Syianne lying on the ground. Blood pooled around her.

He shook his head in frustration, trying to get that image out of his head but to no success. Glitch, sensing that something was wrong, strolled towards him, rubbing and purring against his legs. Jake softened at seeing his efforts to calm him and he picked Glitch up, moving to lay down on the bed. He petted him, smiling at the way the cat burrowed himself further against Jake, curling his tail around his wrist.

After a few peaceful moments of cuddling, Jake's phone lit up with a text, which had him scrambling to grab it from the bedside. Glitch meowed in protest but Jake was too wound up to notice.

Jessy [10:25 pm]

She's in a coma

They don't know when she'll wake up

Jake felt all breath leave him as he read Jessy's text. He didn't know what to think, what to do, what he could do. Jessy didn't give him a chance to respond.

Jessy [10:26 pm]

Don't contact any of us ever again

I don't want to find Hannah this way…which leads to everyone else getting hurt

Please leave Syianne out of this

Saying her mind, Jessy went offline again. Jake took a shaky breath, trying to ground himself. Syianne might never make up.

No, he told himself.

He couldn't think like that. He knew she'd wake up, it might take a little time but she will. Because if she didn't, Jake wouldn't be able to live with himself.

He got another text from Lilly, saying she was sorry that it happened but he couldn't bring himself to write back. His mind was empty, body numb to everything around him and he was cursing himself for being so careless.

If he hadn't been so selfish, if only he didn't put all of this on her, if he had just reached on time, if, if, if.

That's all he thought of, as tears continuously trailed down his cheeks, an arm covering his eyes, the only thing on his mind being Syianne, just as it had been ever since he started talking to her.

⊱⋅ ──────────── ⋅⊰

The next day, Jake found himself holding a large flower bouquet and walking to Duskwood hospital's reception. He was trembling, scared out of his mind but he just had to see Syianne. So, he had braved his anxiety and was now standing in front of the receptionist, who looked at the abnormally large bouquet in his hands and raised an eyebrow. He cleared his throat.

"I'm here to see Syianne King, she was admitted here yesterday."

The receptionist's gaze sharpened as she looked him over and he partially hid behind the flowers.

"Only family members are allowed to visit," she spoke slowly and Jake bit his lip in frustration.

"I'm her fiance," he said and before the surprised receptionist could say anything, he continued, "I drove here as soon as I got the call but they wouldn't tell me what happened. Only that Syianne had been in an accident and I needed to get here as soon as I could and I—" he cut himself off, shuffling nervously and wiping away the tears that had managed to escape from his eyes.

The receptionist softened, seeing his genuine sorrow and care for his fiance and warmed her voice.

"Of course, I'm sorry for what happened. She's in room 309, third floor. The elevator is down the hall," she pointed and Jake thanked her profusely before walking ahead.

Him being Syianne's fiance might have been fake but everything he had felt was the truth and he felt overwhelmed now that he was here. Should he see her? Did he even deserve to see her after he put her in danger? Thoughts like this plagued his mind all the way to Syianne's room and they only stopped when he saw '309' written in bold letters on a grey coloured door.

His breath stuttered in his chest. He was second guessing his presence in the hospital, thinking whether he shouldn't have come. He stood in front of the door for about ten minutes, contemplating but when the nurses started giving him suspicious looks, he swallowed thickly and with shaky hands, opened the door.

Nothing could have prepared him for the utter despair and helplessness he felt, as he saw Syianne's motionless form on the bed, breathing as if she was just sleeping and would wake up any minute. But he knew that wasn't the truth.

She was here and it was his fault.

For the longest time, he just sat on a chair beside her bed and just looked at her. His eyes traced every injury, every bruise that was visible and he felt sick, blaming himself for letting it happen. She was still sleeping and suddenly, it just got too much.

There was too much light, too much beeping, the walls were too white, the flowers in his hands digging into his skin and he got up hastily, dropping the bouquet and backed into the furthest corner of the room.

His breath was coming in short bursts, it hurt to breath, to think, to stay upright—!

His legs gave from under him and he slid down, back against the wall, shaking hands coming up to wipe the wetness on his face.

He didn't even realise he had been crying.

His vision was a blur of dark shapes and in a distinct corner of his head that was still sane, he thought of what Syianne would have done had she been awake. He was sure she would kneel down in front of him and take his hands, running her thumbs against the back of his hands to calm him.

'Breathe slowly, Jake. Deep breaths with me, come on,' he heard her in his head and tried to slow down, breathing harshly at first but after a few minutes, his vision cleared and his breathing stabled to an acceptable rate.

His whole body shook with the sheer suddenness of the panic attack and he slowly tried to get up, holding onto the wall as a support as his gaze, once again, landed on the bed and it's occupant.

All at once, his head cleared and he knew what to do.

Snatching a sheet of paper from the notepad lying near her chart, Jake penned his thoughts, all his anguish, and his apologies on it. Not once did his hand shake as he wrote the note and not once did his mind waver from the decision he had made. At last, when he had said everything he wanted to, he put the pen down and glanced at Syianne's peaceful face.

His throat closed up but he swallowed once to make sure he didn't cry. No, Jake had no time for tears. It was his fault that this happened in the first place, so it was his responsibility that he would make it right.

He didn't know when she would wake but whenever it might be, Jake had everything he wanted to say, already written for her.

He bent down towards her and placed the softest of kisses against her forehead, knowing that it would be the only time he would ever get to do it.

She did not open her eyes and Jake stepped back with a miniscule tilt of his lips.

Yes, he would make everything right.

#duskwood #duskwood jake #everbyte duskwood #duskwood game #everbyte #jake × mc #duskwood jake × mc #jake × player #duskwood fanfic #duskwood fanfiction #duskwood jake × mc fanfic #viotence tw #physical attack tw #coma tw #blood tw #panic attack tw #please read the warnings carefully!!#and i hope you enjoy it ❤️

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