Chapter 1 - Wishful Thinking
“AND THAT IS A CHAMPIONSHIP WIN FOR Y/N L/N! THIS MAKES IT THREE BACK TO BACK RACE WINS FOR THE DAMS’ RACER”
The roar of the crowd is almost deafening. Well, it would be if you could actually hear it.
“Good job, well done on another season. We couldn't be more proud,” your strategist Stella tells you over the radio. You can only sigh as you raise your hand to wave at the crowds. You don’t even know if they can see, but you try your best.
You finally reply, “Good work team.” The switch to the radio is flipped back off, you don’t really want to hear anything else. You and your car finally arrive to Parc Ferme and stop right in front of the number 1 sign. It’s a familiar sight to behold. A second home if you will, since most of the season had been dominated by you.
The steering wheel is turned off and undone and you gently place it down below. Reaching for the hallo, you pull yourself up with a grunt. Standing on the nose, you quickly turn around and raise your fists, earning you multiple cheers and screams.
Instead of a usual jump, you quickly clamor down and walk to your team. You reach their open arms and are met with the multitudes of pats and hits to your helmet. Your eyes never settle on two specific people that you try to look for. Oh well, they didn’t have to come anyway. It wasn't like you were making history. However, Stella is right in the middle and you give her a giant hug.
A second sigh is released, but a good one this time. It was more of a relief to be in the arms of one of your closest friends.
A pat on the shoulder brings you out of your reverie. Turning around, you are met with the helmet of your teammate.
“Arthur!” you yell and open your arms. It was a P1 – P2 finish for your team for the fourth time this year, the first where Arthur was on the top pedestal. This race not only decided your first championship, but his third second place since becoming your teammate.
He quickly returned the hug and led you over to the weigh-in stations. After the number had been jotted down by an unknown official, you are finally allowed to take your helmet and balaclava off. Your baby hairs stick to your forehead, but you know your hair is going to get messed up by the champagne in just a few minutes.
“Think I will have a turn next year, non?” Arthur asks with a cheeky smirk, his accent emerging on the last few words.
"Well, you will have all the chances,” you respond, setting your helmet down on podium. You both make your way to the cool down room and sit in your respective 1 and 2 chairs.
“And welcome back to the y/n podcast,” Arthur jokes and you take a giant swig of your bottled water.
“Ah Bearman is late today,” you say, “I guess he got tired of being number 2 guest.” You grin as Ollie walks in a few minutes later.
“Already started without me?” he asks, watching your impressive overtake in turn 2, which in the end, helped you reach the finish line in a comfortable P1 finish.
You just shrugged, “You were late.”
Your eyes were glued to the screen. An impact between Ollie’s teammate Frederik Vesti and Theo Pourchaire had red flagged the race about halfway through. You possibly could have won by 30 seconds, if you had been able to continue and not have a second standing start.
But oh well, you won anyway.
A steward came to get you three a couple of moments later.
She shook her head with a smile, “Why is it always you three?”
The three of you looked at each other, shrugging.
It just so happened that the only female, the one who was dominated the F2 world, her teammate, and his best friend almost always found themselves on the three podiums. Most of the time it was her, and others, her teammate, and then the rare sighting of the bear.
But you wouldn’t have it any other way.
Well, that was a lie.
But for now, you wouldn’t want it any other way. Just the three of you.
Ollie went first, followed by Arthur.
Then it was your turn to take the middle and highest podium. Taking the trophy from the man, you raised it above your head, fist clenched above. It was truly a sight to behold. Your head was held high as your national anthem blared through the sound speaker, and then the French anthem played for the team.
Right when the anthem finished, the familiar tune of “Les Toreadors Carmen” began. You quickly picked up your bottle of champagne. Slightly shaking the bottle, you quickly pointed it towards the two boys, who had already started spraying theirs at you.
Trying to get away, you accidently kicked your trophy off the top step. With wide eyes, you watched at the top popped off, leaving the base and the actual trophy apart. You quickly looked up and saw both the boys pointing and laughing. You stood in amazement and looked around as if to see if anyone had seen it. Who were you kidding though, of course people had seen it and cameras as well. Oops. At least it was your trophy.
Your hair soon became sticky with the sparkling liquid, your race suit becoming a darker color as it was saturated. You wiped your eyes and you brought the over-sized bottle to your lips. Looking straight into the go-pro, you took a swig and crossed your eyes.
The F2 page would definitely use that footage later.
After the celebrations were over, you quickly made your way towards the journalists that were waiting outside of your garage.
They all shouted your name, wanting to get a quote for whatever paper or website they were writing for. You quickly walked up and grabbed one of the microphones.
A familiar blond woman spoke up first, “Wow, what an amazing accomplishment you’ve done today. How are you feeling?”
There was the overused question.
You took a deep breath before replying, “Ah it was a good run. Not everyone gets an opportunity to do this so I am very happy.” Your smile, however, never really reaches your eyes.
A man with glasses speaks up next, “I know you must be ready for the break after this history breaking win. Do you have any plans for the upcoming winter vacation?”
“Well, you know. Just be at home and enjoy it,” you paused before smirking, “And get some more hours in on the sim. Just doing what I normally do when I’m home.” You shrug after you finish.
They reporters jot down things on their pads of paper. You think that you can finally go back to the comfort of your driver’s room when one more man speaks up. This time with a weird colored tie.
“Regarding the recent hiring of Bianca Bustamante at McLaren for their Driver Development Program, how are you feeling knowing that a woman, not even in F2, now has a chance to drive an F1 car before you do?”
Now that question gets you and you pause.
What?
You stutter out, “I’m sorry?”
The man takes a deep breath. “Well I know that you recently projected that you’d be interested in an Formula 1 team as big as McLaren and hoped that you’d be able to get one foot in the door. I mean, you’ve been in F2 for three years now, and you aren’t even a reserve driver?” The man pressed his recorder closer to you.
Suddenly, the outside felt like it was closing in. Taking a deep breath, you try to answer to the best of your ability.
“Well, number one, I wasn’t aware that Bianca had been signed, but good for her. There always needs to be more openings for women in motor sports and I’m glad that she got in. Am I disappointed? Sure, but that’s life. My turn will come soon.”
The man nodded and looked away.
Seeing as no one spoke up after your statement, you said a quick thank you before handing the microphone to someone else.
Finally you could retreat back to your room and finally change.
The minute the door close, you leaned back against it and slid to the floor. Reaching for your phone, you quickly open the Instagram app. Orange upon orange is the first thing you see.
Headlines of “BUSTAMANTE SIGNS WITH MCLAREN FOR DRIVER DEVELOPMENT” were all you could see.
Tears pricked your eyes, but you refused to let them fall. Of course they would go with her. Much more pretty, definitely meets the CEO’s look of younger drivers, would look gorgeous in papaya.
All the things you believed yourself not to be.
You knew it was a long stretch sending an email wanting to discuss future plans with the papaya team. They already had all the reserve drivers they needed, and apparently the development drivers too.
It seemed like every door for every team was closed at the moment.
Hauling yourself off the floor, you peeled your racing suit off, leaving the champagne soaked material to hang at your hips.
Walking over to the small desk in the corner, you grabbed your headphones. Connecting them to your phone, the familiar voice of Noah Kahan filled the void.
You were there for a little more than an hour before someone came looking for you. Not surprised, you let Arthur into your own little paradise. Someplace where the reporters and cameras could not get to you.
He sat down on your bed while you sat down on the floor.
He inhaled sharply before speaking.
“I saw the interview.”
Your head bowed in defeat. “Yeah.”
“You know, it’s not true what they’re saying. You deserve a seat and you know this.”
You nodded. “Well, they don’t seem to think so. What is it going to take Thur? I've already exhausted my options. There's nothing here for me. I don’t think I’ll ever be promoted. I’m not…” you trailed off, not knowing what to say.
Arthur quickly shakes his head before sliding down to join you on the floor. He places both hands on either side of you head and maneuvers you to look at him.
“Listen to me,” he tells you, accent a little heavier, “you are one of the best drivers of our age. You cannot go bashing yourself when a reporter thinks it good to get a rouse out of you.”
“Well, I’m no Max Verstappen…or your brother.”
“And you don’t have to be. All you need to do is be Y/n L/n.”
He smiled. You only nodded again, soaking in his words.
After a small bit of silence, you spoke up in a wishful voice, “If you were to sign with any F1 team, which one would it be?”
He thought for a moment, “I think the answer for me better be Ferrari, to be with my brother. But with their shit season so far, I don’t think I’d want to drive that tractor.”
You wheezed and held him tight as the giggles shook your body. Arthur could help but join in. After you both calmed down, your breaths were only heard.
“What about you?” he turns his head, wishful asking.
“With my luck, I’d also have to drive a tractor,” you cracked a smile.
“Then we’d be driving tractors together. But I’m serious, which one?”
You hummed, before silencing. Thoughts scrambling to come up with an answer. Sure, you had dreams. Dreams of papaya, green, teal and black, white and navy, burgundy. But never red as Arthur wishes.
You finally answer, “I’d take the Bull. Drive a little illegal rocket ship.”
Arthur huffed. “Are we destined to be rivals Miss L/n? I don’t think the racing world could handle another Leclerc-Verstappen rivalry.”
“Oh be quiet. I’m not on his level. And besides, if something were to happen, it would be nothing but an inchident…on the race.”
Now it was Arthur’s turn to sputter and laugh. You decided to disconnect your headphones and let the music fill the small room.
Placing your head on Arthur’s shoulder, you both let out sighs.
Wishful thinking, that’s all it was.
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testing, testing * fem!driver
nobody is more glad to be back in bahrain in her new race car more than the girl racing for andretti
pairings: fernando alonso x fem!driver, logan sargeant x fem!driver, oscar piastri x fem!driver, sebastian vettel x fem!driver, liam lawson x fem!driver
notes: hi surprise before the first race of 2024 and also because I've been writing this piece for like a week now
(series masterlist) | (📂 the sophomore year)
she sighs, tilting her head as she looks down at the car. her hand hovers above the side pod as she grins, “ah, my baby. so pretty.”
liam, standing next to her, has a scowl on his face as he lifts his eyebrow at her. “what?”
“look at the purple on this car,” she whispers in bewilderment as she claps her hand, bouncing on her tiptoes. “she’s so pretty! i have a good feeling about this year, liam!” she grabs his shoulder and shakes him as she throws her head back. “this is our year and i’m going to win a race for andretti.”
“if you don’t stop shaking me, i’ll throw myself in front of your car and you’ll have to find a new teammate.”
she hums. “i have fred — toto will hand him over if i bat my eyelashes and say really nice things and offer free babysitting.”
“hater,” liam mutters, shaking his head. he turns his head back to the car. it is pretty: the purple and the specks of black give it a nice touch. “but it is a pretty nice car. it felt nice right?”
“it did.”
she sighs and leans on the car with her arms wide open. she pushes her cheek against the halo of the car. “i love you, my baby car. we’re gonna win a race together.”
“what’s going on?”
liam turns his head and shrugs. “not sure. might be the lack of ice cream in her bloodstream that’s making her like this.”
which is possible. sebastian and noah (her physical trainer) had banned her from ice cream for testing, afraid that she would simply camp out in the bathroom in the short couple of hours she has in the car today.
“i drank pepsi, it’s okay,” she giggles, scrunching her nose. she perks up with a giddy smile and looks around with her lips pursed. “where is oscar? he owes me timtams.”
“no chocolate either,” sebastian says sternly, furrowing his eyebrows at the young girl.
“what? why not?”
“because you’ll kill yourself when you’re in the car for too long,” noah sighs with the shake of his head. “eat fruits like normal people.”
“normal…” liam furrows his eyebrows as he turns to the slightly older man. “who eats fruits for fun?”
“they’re good for you.”
“they’re not all good. they could give you diabetes.”
“fruits can give you diabetes?” she yelps, shoving liam back a couple of steps with wide eyes. “i knew there’s a reason i resented fruits! they’re so unhealthy!”
“actually it’s because you didn’t have an ounce of internet safety growing up. you were traumatised by annoying orange,” liam mutters. only then he notices that it’s something he was sworn to secrecy by logan. he glances at the girl, breathing heavily as her eye twitches. “or so i assume.”
noah turns to her. “you’re scared of annoying orange?”
prepared for the girl to unleash some sort of violence on him, liam sucks in a deep breath as he closes his eyes to brace for impact. much to his surprise, she just nods and walks past him to walk to where her helmet is.
“yeah. and it’s all blythe watched growing up. so it was kinda,” she shrugs, “detrimental to my brain development.”
liam raises his eyebrow. “that’s the only thing that held back your development?”
“that and meeting you in my early teen years for sure altered my brain chemistry.”
“wow.”
“i know. kinda sucks, doesn’t it?”
pre-season testing has always been one of the days of the year that she’s most excited for. going out there and showing everybody she can do — it’s always fun to shut a lot of people up. and it’s the one time that she can drive a race car without so much pressure on her shoulders.
it’s lots of fun, really. and after not seeing a couple people over the break, it’s fun to be back in the paddocks to mess around with them.
she rests the helmet above her head and turns to liam with a grin. “if i beat you in testing, you owe me 5 pints of rocky road.”
“rocky–”
liam punches her shoulder gently. “you’re on. and if i beat you, you do my laundry for a week.”
“yeah– wait, how is that fair? boy laundry is gross!”
“you live with a boy!”
“i don’t do his laundry! logan’s a grown ass man!”
“enough bickering,” sebastian sighs, putting a hand behind her back. his other hand lands on the top of her helmet and slowly pushes hit down to help her put it on. he understands her excitement: she’s missed racing so much that she had resorted to bringing her brother karting over the winter break. “get in the car and show everyone what you can do.”
she squeals. “and beat liam and get my ice cream.”
“yeah, that too.”
she drives into the pitlane, chewing on the inside of her cheek as she looks for the set of andretti garages. she sighs as she comes to a stop, feeling the car be lifted as they put her back into the garage for a little more testing.
“aw, hey! you’re back,” liam grins, knocking on the top of her helmet. she swats his hands away from her head as she grips on the halo to pull herself out of the car. “how was it?”
“i was not feeling great. but i reckon it’s just me,” she shrugs, voice muffled by the layers over her mouth. “i’m telling you — i need my ice cream. i can handle it without having to run to the bathroom before a race!”
liam scrunches his nose. “you’re not fooling anyone with that.”
“i swear, mate,” she throws her head back in frustration, “it was just the rookie vibes last year. i’m better this year.”
he hums, turning around to readjust the headphones on his head. “i don’t reckon sebastian and noah would believe you. but alright.”
“believe me!”
“believe what?”
“what are you doing here?” she giggles, covering her mouth as she hunches over. “you got my ice cream?”
mick sighs heavily, shoulders slumping when their eyes meet. he presses his lips together and shakes his head and her smile drops. “noah checked me for illegal items on the way in.”
“that asshole!” she shrieks, turning to the large doors where her trainer stands. “you don’t understand — i need my ice cream! i’m dying.”
“i know,” mick turns to the pit wall where sebastian sits, swinging his legs as he eats the ice cream reserved specifically for the girl. “i got caught. i’m sorry.”
she clenches her jaw and turns away from sebastian grinning smugly as her from across the pitlane. she hums. “i will find a way to get myself ice cream. just you wait.”
“i don’t reckon that’s a good idea mate,” liam mutters. “you’ve still got the afternoon session for to drive. maybe you should sit this one out.”
she wiggles her finger in the air as she walks towards the backdoor of her garage. “no can do. i’m sure oscar’s got some extra ice cream from me.”
“no, you cannot race one another during testing.”
“why not? not even a little bit?” max shrugs, frowning as he throws his hands into the air. “just one lap.”
the girl, standing next to him, nods with a wide smile. “please? we won’t crash into one another, i promise.”
“you’re not supposed to crash into one another even in a normal race!” sebastian points out, scratching his head in frustration.
it is one thing to compare lap times when you’re pushing everything out of your car, but to go out on the track and race side by side is another thing. there is simply too much at stake, especially for a time like pre-season testing where everything is in shambles.
“okay, fine!” she huffs, throwing her head back before turning to max. she drops her head. “might i suggest a scooter race around the paddocks before the afternoon session today? after lunch?”
sebastian clears his throat, prompting both of them to turn their heads to look at him before max could muster an answer. “i thought i told you that you can’t use your stupid scooter without adult supervision?”
she looks at him in confusion. “i was talking about the scooter fernando got me.”
“aw, he got you a scooter?” max whines, frowning. “i wanted one — kelly wouldn’t let me get one.”
“seriously?” she giggles. “logan, oscar and i got one along. mine’s the cutest, i’d reckon. you might be able to use oscar’s!”
sebastian just sighs. he waves them off and turns on his heel and starts to walk the other day. “get yourselves injured, i don’t even care.”
“you’re… asking me to join you?”
“what does it sound like?”
a sheepish giggle passes the man’s lips as he covers his mouth and takes a step back. “i feel so honoured. i’m being included in your activities?”
liam furrows his eyebrows. “what’s that supposed to mean? it’s just a scooter ride around the track before the new session. it’s not a big deal.”
“it’s literally a scooter race out on the race track,” she whispers, turning away from liam to look at fernando in confusion. “literally kilometres on a fucking scooter meant for kids.”
“and we somehow convinced the marketing team to film us doing it for content,” logan beams, puffing his chest with his hands on his hips.
they went on a limb when the girl texted their groupchat: something about helping her convince the f1 marketing team to let them book the track for 40 minutes so they could race on it without getting into trouble.
she walked in with logan, oscar and liam trailing behind her with a half thought out speech, a sweet smile and a dream. she barely even made it halfway through the speech she spent so long thinking over while she had her lunch when they agreed without another thought.
and being that it was fernando’s idea to get them all matching scooters (actually a gift to liam for his rookie year, but the girl had convinced him to get her one too), they invited him along as well.
and max, because sebastian had admitted that fernando got him one as well. he had been too ashamed to admit it, muttering about how borderline embarrassing it is.
“how did you do that? they never agree to my ideas.”
“how can you resist a face like this?” liam asks.
liam puts a hand under her face, logan squeezes her cheeks together and oscar pushes her nose up. she poses with her hand in a peace sign.
“i’d feel threatened if i were the f1 marketing team.”
“hey, take that back!” she cries. she swats the hands from her face and grins. “are you joining us or not?”
fernando shrugs. “sure, why not.”
there’s a screech that breaks the barrier by the pitlane followed by the clanging of something. everyone pipes down, heads turning and looking around in curiousity to find the source of the scream.
“there’s no way this happened to me again!”
along the track’s grid is the girl sitting on the ground, hands up in the air with her scooter not too far from her. she’s surrounded by her friends first before the marketing crew finally takes steps forward to check on her.
“if i were you, i’d take this as a sign to just stick with a car,” oscar laughs, clutching his stomach.
“yeah, mate,” logan wipes tears from his eyes, “there’s no way you’re two for two falling down and hurting yourself on a scooter.”
her teammate, however, towers over her with hands over his hips. “i swear you might be stupid. how did you fall down again on a scooter that’s meant for kids?”
she looks up, genuine tears in her eyes as the red liquid seeps out of her palms. “you guys are so mean!”
fernando looks down at her. “are you okay?”
“no!” she holds her hands up to fernando to show him where she is bleeding. “it hurts!”
“okay, mija,” fernando grins, nodding empathetically. he puts a hand on her elbow and the other around her back to help her up. “let’s get you some first aid.”
max appears, actually being the only one that finished the race, still riding on a scooter. he balances on it and tilts his head, “really? again?”
her head snaps back around to max, taking a threatening step forward with an arm wound back to hit him. “max emilian verstappen!”
“not the government name,” he scoffs, furrowing his eyebrows. “this is why you fell down.”
“bitch,” she mutters as fernando whisks her away. “there’s no trophy so it doesn’t even count.”
“you’re just mad that max beat you,” liam snorts, rolling his eyes, “and fernando… and logan… and oscar…”
“you didn’t beat me though, so i’m fine with that.”
“oh, my god?”
“what happened?”
the two germans walk into the garage to her sitting on a bench with her head dropped, being bandaged by noah.
“she fell down,” noah answers immediately, shaking his head as he spares her one more disappointed stare. “can you believe it?”
“have you considered just… not racing?” mick asks, tilting his head. “on a scooter, i mean.”
she shakes her head. “i have to be the best at everything.”
“wow,” sebastian blinks, “well, are you okay?” he looks over liam’s shoulder and rolls his eyes as well. “seriously? the same spot as before?”
“hey, i didn’t take your stupid smart glasses — just mind your own business!” she slouches and lets out a heavy sigh. “it wasn’t even my fault this time.”
liam perks up. “i didn’t do shit to you, mate! you’re just stupid!”
“you were screaming at me approaching me from behind!”
“i was not! i was simply singing the mission impossible theme song!”
“same thing! it was intimidation — you should have been disqualified for that.”
“sore loser!”
“you know what this means?” she hums, batting her eyelashes at sebastian with a small grin. this is her only chance into coaxing herself to completion. “ice–“
before she can finish her plea, her race engineer is already walking away from her with a hand held up in her direction. “not a chance.”
“okay.”
“good results, mate!” liam screams, his claps filling the garage as she climbs out of her car. “you’re in the top 10!”
she turns her head towards him, the way her shoulders and back straighten an easy telltale of how she feels. she pushes her visor up, “really?” she sees the smug grin on his face, ripping her gloves off and throwing it at him. “there’s only 10 of us testing today!”
“you believed me, though.”
“i literally just drove several laps out!” she hits him. “you’re so annoying — i wish mick was my teammate.”
liam shakes his head as she takes her helmet off. “you don’t mean that.”
“i actually do. very much,” she sighs. she puts her helmet into the seat of her car and turns to liam, only then noticing that liam is now holding something out to her. “oh!”
“yeah, i got you ice cream!” liam beams proudly. “they didn’t have rocky road, but… i figured it’s still chocolate ice cream and you wouldn’t–“
he’s cut off by the girl throwing herself at him, wrapping her arms around him beforw pulling away to take the small cup into her hands. “aw, liam! thank you!”
“we’re going to have so much fun this year.”
“bold of you to assume i won’t run you off track like i did in f2.”
“i’m prepared to hit you back — you’re an adult now.”
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"I'd do anything" (M)
Summary:
Desperate to expunge your squeaky clean record you go to Jeonghan and tell him you’ll do anything if he’ll get you drugs
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Tags: dubcon, bad reputation!Jeonghan, good student!yn, afab yn, anal, bribing, begging, creampie, rough sex, mean!jeonghan, impact!play, safewords made but never used, yn is a virgin, but really just so jeonghan can tease them for it, teasing, virginity is taken very not seriously, multiple orgasms?, fingering, a dash of exhibitionism cause yeah, condescending!jeonghan, this is not realistic okay, *squint* talks of aftercare, drugs are mentioned
But Brie, this isn’t an accurate representation of someone losing their virginity, but brie why is Jeonghan so rough and mean, but brie why can’t you think of any other way to describe someone “getting hot” or “turning red” BECAUSE…. BECAUSE…. SHUT UP OKAY?!
-
You couldn’t help the way that you paced back and forth in front of Jeonghan’s dorm room door, trying to figure out if this was really the move. After all, wasn’t all of this a bit much?
Yes, in elementary school you had preened under the attention of being the good kid. Even in middle school you had enjoyed being what everyone considered to be the teacher’s pet, but when you hit high school… It got old. You were so tired of the way that people would talk to you. The way that they looked down on you because, you actually studied during your free period, and because your teachers trusted you to run errands for them during class.
You weren’t just some good kid who was constantly doing the right thing. You weren’t just interested in studying all the time. You wanted to be invited to parties. You wanted to have friends who you went drinking with.
But your reputation in high school was set. Unwavering. So, you thought you would just wait until college and finally you would be free.
And then college was the same.
You had to do something drastic. You were desperate to get your reputation expunged.
And so that’s why you were here.
“Look at who it is…”
You jumped, your teeth biting into the back of your hand as you screwed your eyes shut, trying to shake the pure fear out of your body at having been caught… Here. By just the person that you were trying to see.
“Ah… Jeonghan!” You said, raising your hand to the back of your neck.
Jeonghan raised an eyebrow at you, a few strands of his long dark hair falling in his face. You swallowed hard under his watchful gaze, turning your eyes away from him. That… Was quite the mistake. Suddenly you found yourself pressed up against Jeonghan’s door, his hand pressed by your hand on the door, his other hand on his doorknob. You swallowed hard at having suddenly been pressed up against the wall. Like you were in a fucking anime.
You didn’t really… Know Jeonghan all that well. You knew about as much as everyone did. Rumored to have mafia connections. Quiet… Mostly kept to himself, staying only around a select few.
You hadn’t ever heard of him actually doing anything that really labeled him as a bad boy, but he had the label none-the-less.
Maybe it came from this: His cocky behavior.
“To what do I owe the pleasure?” Jeonghan asked, a smile flickering across his lips. “Wasn’t expecting our school’s star student coming knocking on the black sheep’s door.”
You swallowed, and you were pretty sure the sound was audible.
“Do you live here?” You asked with a laugh. “I had no clue.”
Jeonghan stared at you. You sucked in another breath.
“I need drugs.”
Jeonghan’s eyebrows shot up in surprise and he pulled back a little. He stared at you for a few seconds, clearly unsure of what to say. Then he pulled all the way back and nudged your shoulder with his.
“Ha.”
You stumbled to the side as Jeonghan opened his dorm room door, and you watched for a few seconds in confusion before realizing that Jeonghan was just going to leave you out in his hallway. You pushed between him and his opening bedroom door.
“I’m serious,” you blurted insistently. “I need drugs.”
“What are you going to do with drugs?” Jeonghan asked you back. “You wouldn’t even know how to use them.”
Frustration strummed through you.
“Yes, I would, you just… Smoke weed or whatever,” you insisted. “And like, you shoot heroin with a needle.”
“You’re asking for heroin?” Jeonghan asked back.
“I’m asking for marijuana!” You blurted back. Even as you spoke Jeonghan was placing the palm of his hand to your mouth. You protested adamantly as he pushed you back into his dorm room. You stumbled upon no longer being pressed against the door and Jeonghan shut his dorm room behind you.
“Marijuana,” Jeonghan said, in a mocking tone. “Is not exactly legal here. It’s not easy to come by. And why do you think that I would be able to get it for you.”
He locked his door with a click.
“Or even want to get it for you.”
“Well…” You trailed off. “I mean…” You had no real reason to think that Jeonghan could get this for you. And you had no bargaining tricks to actually get him to get you the drugs either. Your mind raced as you tried to figure out what you could say. What a good thing to convince him would be.
“I’ll let you fuck me.”
Silence filled the room. Jeonghan’s eyes trailed down your body as you began to burn a deep red. You swallowed hard, wondering what was making you so impulsive. I’ll let you fuck me? What the fuck kind of proposition was that?
His eyes made their way back up your body and he put his hands on his hips, bunching his baggy white shirt up with it. He opened his mouth, surely to reject you.
“Anywhere,” you blurted back instead. “You can fuck me anywhere you want. Men like that right?”
Jeonghan seemed even more thrown off by your words.
“What are you even talking about?”
“Anal.”
Oh my god, you wished you would just shut up.
“You would let me fuck you in the ass?” Jeonghan asked. You couldn’t tell if he was amused or not. You firmly pressed your lips together so that you wouldn’t say anything else stupid. You gave him one curt nod.
Silence fell between you and Jeonghan as he stared you down, but you refused to back down from whatever he was trying to get you to back down from.
Finally, he sighed, looking away from you.
“Why didn’t you just go to Hansol?” He asked you. As he spoke, he guided you over to his bed, pushing you down on it. You watched him with the innocence of… Well, the good kid that everyone always painted you as. You moved your hands to your lap, watching as he walked to the complete opposite end of his dorm. He took a seat on his roommate’s bed, propping his elbows up on his knees. He was… The very definition of man spreading.
You suddenly remembered that he had asked you a question.
“I…” You weren’t really certain of how to answer. Why hadn’t you just gone to Hansol? Everyone on campus knew that Hansol was a stoner and if Hansol was a stoner then he would certainly know where to buy you something.
And Hansol was a really sweet guy. If you were to ask him there would be no question on whether or not he would help you achieve your goal.
“I don’t know Hansol that well,” you finally said. Jeonghan let his head rest on his knuckles.
“And you know me better?” He pressed. Your fingers dug into your pants, your teeth catching the inside of your mouth nervously. “Why do you even want drugs?”
Now that was a question you could answer.
“I’m tired of my reputation.” You blurted. “Tired of everyone talking to me like I’m some innocent kid just because I get good grades and I’m nice to teachers. I’m not perfect, I don’t need to be babied.”
Jeonghan hummed.
“Well, despite your adamancy you are innocent,” he stated. You glared at him, fingers pinching your thighs through your pants.
“I’m not innocent,” you pressed.
“Yes, you are,” Jeonghan argued back, his lips quirking up at the sight of your frustration. “And that’s why you came here. Isn’t it?”
“I came here to ask you to get me drugs,” you said back.
“Well, I won’t get you any,” Jeonghan replied just as evenly. Your eyes widened at the flat-out denial of your request.
“But-!” You stood up without really thinking. “Jeonghan I’ll do anything.”
Jeonghan’s eyebrows quirked.
“Seriously! Anything you want Jeonghan. You can do anything you want to me, I’m serious. I’d-”
“Is that not prostitution?” Jeonghan asked. Your mouth dropped open, and once again he had left you stuped.
“What?”
“It just seems like you’re trying to sell your body to me,” Jeonghan pointed out. He pulled himself up a little bit, raising his eyes to make your gaze more even now that you were standing. He leaned back on his hands and his head fell to the side a bit. “In that case you would be bribing me to commit a crime by trying to get me to commit a different crime.”
Your jaw stayed open.
“I just thought-” God, what kind of guy even was Jeonghan? “If you’re not going to do it then just tell me you aren’t going to do it.”
“I already told you I wasn’t going to do it,” Jeonghan replied calmly.
At this point, your heart was racing and your face was burning red. Every part of you wanted to just storm out angrily, and Jeonghan seemed to read that in your eyes.
“What’s wrong angel, did I make you mad?” He asked. “You’re used to getting everything that you want, aren’t you?”
If it was possible your face burned even hotter.
“That’s not true.”
“Then why are you still here?” Jeonghan pressed. He got up to his feet, reminding you of your unfortunate height difference. He walked back over to you and his fingers buried into your hair. He tugged your hair at its roots so that you were forced to look up at him.
You felt your mouth go dry.
“You said you aren’t innocent, but you are and that’s why you really came here today,” Jeonghan said. He once again looked you up and down, a small humming leaving his throat as he stared at you.
“You wanted me to come expunge your record. You wanted to prove to everyone that you truly are in fact no longer innocent. You knew that if you asked Hansol he would let you smoke with him. And you also knew that to get what you want you don’t even have to smoke weed.”
Jeonghan shifted his weight, but he didn’t loosen his grip.
“You could do something as innocent as start smoking cigarettes and people would start to look at you differently. All you have to do to get those is go to the closest gas station.
Jeonghan leaned forward a bit, his face growing closer to yours. He smiled as your eyes flickered down to his lips.
“You want me to take your virginity.”
Your eyes widened.
“I’m not a virgin.”
He laughed.
“No?” He clearly didn’t believe you. “And I suppose I was wrong about everything before too.”
Jeonghan’s head tilted down a little bit and you let your head tilt up a bit too, your brain lost in a haze, thinking that he was going to kiss you. Jeonghan’s lips were so close to yours.
“Got you.”
Your face burned.
“This doesn’t mean I’m a virgin,” you murmured. Jeonghan’s fingers released your hair, and he took a step back from you. You cleared your throat, brushing your fingers through your strands in order to tidy yourself back up again.
“I’m not going to take your virginity,” Jeonghan said pointedly. “Why did you think that I was going to do it anyways?”
“What do you want me to do then?” You asked, finally relinquishing to the idea that you were in fact a virgin. “You want me to go to someone else? Let some other person take my virginity and then come back to you and beg you to buy me drugs.”
Jeonghan’s eyes widened a bit.
“Don’t just ask people to take your virginity,” he blurted. “And just ask Hansol. I’ll call you for him.”
Jeonghan took a few steps away from you in order to get his phone out. He started to mess with it, but you just huffed.
“Well, is there something wrong with me then?” You demanded. “Is that what it is? I’m too innocent to fuck.”
Jeonghan laughed dryly, not looking up at you as he presumably pulled up Hansol’s contact.
“You being too innocent isn’t why I won’t fuck you.”
You snatched his phone out of his hands, forcing him to look at you .
“Then why?” You prodded. Jeonghan shifted his weight, propping one of his hands on his hip.
“Because I’m not going to go easy on you just because it’s your first time. If you taunt me with being able to fuck any hole on you, I’m going to do it. No hesitation.”
“But you are hesitating,” you grumbled. Jeonghan rolled his eyes.
“You don’t want me to?”
You let silence fill the room at his question, which made him smile.
“You’re hesitating,” he pointed out.
“Just fuck me,” you insisted. “Please.”
Jeonghan put a single finger to your forehead and leaned forward.
“Rules.”
Your eyes zeroed in on his finger.
“One: You can’t tell anyone,” he said. “I don’t want people on my ass for being the ‘bad boy’-” He used air quotations. “- who took your virginity.”
Your eyebrows furrowed slightly.
“Okay.”
“Two: You’ll tell me if you’re uncomfortable with anything that is happening,” he replied firmly. “I may be… Rough but I’m not heartless. It’s your first time if you need me to go… Slower…”
He seemed to be a bit bothered as he said that. You could tell that he was rethinking whether or not he wanted to actually take your virginity.
“Just say something,” he finally said. “Seriously, no shame.”
“It’s not going to bother me,” you protested. “Just cause it’s my first time doesn’t mean that I won’t… Like it.”
Jeonghan’s finger pressed harder into your forehead.
“You don’t know what I’m into,” you said.
Jeonghan hummed and then spoke a word. Your eyebrows furrowed and you repeated it in confusion. Jeonghan rolled his eyes.
“It’s your safe word,” he stated plainly. “I’ll stop if you just say stop, but if that’s uncomfortable to you for some reason-”
“I know what a safe word is,” you interrupted him. Feeling a bit annoyed. “I told you. You don’t know what I’m into.”
Jeonghan didn’t look entirely convinced.
“Three… You have to beg for it and prove you really want it.”
Your face burned under his gaze, not entirely sure what he wanted you to say. Sure, you had read tons of stories about this, and watched a handful of videos where someone had to beg but… To actually have to do it.
“I’m not patient,” Jeonghan mumbled. You swallowed hard and forced yourself to keep your eyes on him.
“Please fuck me,” you mumbled softly. “I want you so badly Jeonghan.”
You thought you sounded a bit robotic, but Jeonghan seemed to like it. His lips quirked up a bit in amusement. Once again, his fingers buried in your hair, and he held you tight, forcing you to look him in the eyes.
“Really?” He pressed, wanting more.
“Really,” you agreed. “I’ve… Been thinking about you ever since I first saw you.”
You wished you could say it wasn’t true but Jeonghan was right in his accusations that you had been strategic in the way that you had gone about this whole situation. You had been desperate to get his attention, and you had genuinely thought that you would be able to trick Jeonghan into thinking that you didn’t want it so badly by coming under the guise of I’ll do anything for drugs.
But it seemed that wasn’t the case. He had seen right through you.
“Life isn’t one of your shitty porn videos,” Jeonghan chided you softly. “If you wanted to fuck me… Well angel, you should have just asked.”
Jeonghan tipped his head down a bit more, his nose brushing yours as his lips ghosted yours.
“Last chance to stay pure.”
The tone of his voice told you that he didn’t actually believe that fucking someone made them impure, and still the words sent a shiver through your body. You tilted your chin up, letting your lips brush his. Jeonghan laughed at your weak attempt to initiate the kiss.
“Is it your first kiss too?” He teased you lightly. At this rate he was so close to you that you were confident that he could just feel the redness of your cheeks by your twos close proximity.
You raised both of your hands to Jeonghan’s head.
“Shut up.”
You pulled him close to you, squashing your lips together, but the fact that you actually hadn’t kissed anyone before was pretty evident.
Jeonghan laughed against your lips and pulled away slightly, his fingers burying into your hair again.
“It really is your first kiss,” he said in awe.
“It’s…” You trailed off, face burning. “Don’t laugh at me.”
“I’m not laughing at you,” Jeonghan assured lightly. His hands dropped to your side, and he tugged at the bottom of your shirt. “It’s just amusing… Do you really not care about the importance of your first time?”
He gave you a small kiss, and then pulled your shirt over your head. He gave you another kiss, putting one hand to the small of your back and the other hand to the clasp of your bra.
“Firsts don’t really mean anything,” you mumbled. Jeonghan feigned offense.
“If firsts don’t mean anything does that mean I’m not special?”
You snorted at his faux tone but that didn’t matter at all to him. You hadn’t even realized what he was doing until suddenly your bra had loosened around your chest. Your face burned red, and you suddenly raised your hands to your chest, holding up your bra weakly. Jeonghan snorted at you.
“You know if I’m going to fuck you anywhere than I am going to be seeing you naked right?”
Your face was still bright red.
“That doesn’t mean I’m not going to be a little embarrassed about it,” you mumbled softly. Jeonghan took your wrist with one of his hands, forcing your arm away from your body, letting your bra to lopsidedly fall off your other arm. As he moved your arm he also moved your body, guiding you over to the wall. He didn’t push you against it but he may as well have with how close he was to you. He made sure to toss aside your bra once he had released your arm, and then he took you by your hips, now pressing you into the wall.
“Let’s see what we are working with,” Jeonghan mumbled, and the way that he looked at you made you realize what it was like to be seen as an object. And not in the way that you had seen people describe it on tiktok. No, you knew now what it felt like when one of the characters of your adult fantasy novels said that the male lead looked at them like an object.
Heat rushed through your body so quickly that you were surprised when Jeonghan raised his hand to pinch at one of your nipples and it was rock hard. You resisted the urge to push him away, because you had never been touched by someone like this before, and you were finding the burn of your body intoxicating.
Jeonghan raised his other hand to your breasts, completely cupping the other one, and you raised your hand to your mouth, biting down on your knuckle to keep from making any embarrassing sounds. You tried to watch Jeonghan as he began to fondle with your breasts, but the heat in his eyes that you had only ever seen written before was a bit overwhelming. You found yourself having to turn your head, pressing your hand into your mouth harder as he squeezed and kneaded your breasts.
“No one’s ever touched you like this before either huh?” Jeonghan observed, and when he spoke you realized that he was very close to your neck. As soon as the words were completely out of his mouth, his lips had latched on your neck. You cried out against your hand and shook your head to say no even though he couldn’t see you.
Jeonghan’s head dipped a bit lower after having bit down a few times on your neck. He kissed over your collarbone and then his mouth was gently sucking one of your nipples into his mouth.
You gasped out in surprise and your hands darted to his head, your fingers grabbing at his hair.
“A-Ah, Jeong-”
You felt his lips curve up into a smile and his teeth nipped lightly at your nipple.
“You’re so reactive,” he murmured. “I forgot how loud virgins are.”
“Stop calling me a virgin,” you whined. In response Jeonghan lowered one of his hands, sliding it down your hips. He unbuttoned your pants with a single flick, and slowly pushed his hand into your underwear. Your face burned and your hands tugged at his hair urgently.
“What are yo-” You were interrupted by your own surprised moan as Jeonghan slipped a finger into you. You slammed your hand over your mouth at the sound of your moan.
“Even a virgin would be better than you at handling a finger in their cunt,” he murmured. His head dipped back down, refocusing on your tits. You tugged at his hair with the one hand that wasn’t (poorly) stifling your moans.
“It’s like you’ve never even fingered yourself before,” Jeonghan said, his voice heightened in amusement. His fingers slipped from you, and he pulled away from you. He slipped his finger into his mouth.
“Drop your pants.”
You stared at him; your hands having had to catch yourself on the wall in surprise at the loss of his support. He raised an eyebrow at you as you panted there dumbly.
“Don’t look at me like an idiot, take off your pants.”
You nodded and struggled to get the pants off. Once they were tossed aside awkwardly on the floor Jeonghan sat down in front of you, looking up at you from where he was now cross-legged on the floor.
“Spread your legs,” he mumbled softly. You did so the best that you could while standing against the wall. “Good… Now, I want you to run your hands down your body…”
Your eyebrows furrowed and again- You did the best that you could to slid your hands down, a bit confused on where you were going. Jeonghan rolled his eyes.
“Down to your pussy angel,” he murmured. “But… Don’t touch your clit. Want to watch you finger yourself.”
Your eyebrows rose in surprise.
“I’m not going to-”
“Didn’t you say you would do anything for those drugs?” He asked you. Your lips pressed in frustration. “Or were you just saying that because you wanted me to fuck you? You didn’t think I was going to hold you to that promise? Anything?”
Your body was warm. Did that mean that he was going to do everything you offered…? Did that mean-
“You know a virgin shouldn’t be so excited to do anal,” Jeonghan commented. Before you could argue that he was gesturing at you to move faster.
“Come on, if you can’t even finger yourself why should I fuck you? I can’t teach you everything,” he commented, and there was a disgruntled tone in his voice that made you lightly bang the back of your head against the wall as you finally slid one of your fingers into yourself.
“I know how to finger myself,” you murmured, your voice was a bit airy as you spoke. Your finger was a bit shorter and thinner than Jeonghan’s had been. Just a bit. So, you were a bit frustrated even though he had only been fingering you for a little bit. You slipped a second finger into you, trying to pish your fingers as deep into as you could manage.
“You’re doing such a good job,” Jeonghan praised lightly. “I don’t even know why you came. You don’t need me to get off do you?”
You looked down at Jeonghan, face surely bright red at being watched. Jeonghan tilted his up a bit.
“Why don’t you play with your tits too huh? Give me a bit of a show.”
You opened your mouth to protest cause this wasn’t what you meant when you said anything but even as you were doing that you were raising your free hand to knead and pinch at your breasts. A whine left your mouth at the feeling instead of a sentence of protest towards Jeonghan.
You let your head hit the back of the wall again, and your eyes fluttered shut as you tried to pretend that Jeonghan wasn’t there watching you in his room, fucking yourself against the wall. But… It was all you could remember, that Jeonghan was watching. His little hums of approval vibrating through the room every once in a while.
You pressed a third finger into you, curling your fingers deep inside of you, forcing out a gasp.
“A bit presumptuous with all those fingers, I didn’t even have to tell you.”
A sound of frustration was your only reply.
“Y/n,” he voice came sharp. “Look at me.”
You reluctantly pried your eyes open and looked down at Jeonghan. Your hand fucking your pussy was soaked. You wanted to pretend that it wasn’t because of Jeonghan because experiencing your fantasies wasn’t always supposed to be as good as reading about them, but despite that thought in your head you knew that you had never dripped down your thighs like this at home for fantasies.
“You ever fucked yourself in the ass before?” He asked you, rather bluntly, you thought. You shook your head, biting down on the inside of your cheeks. Jeonghan hummed.
“And yet you offered it up? You probably could even fit a pencil in there, much less your fingers, or my dick,” he commented, and again that way he spoke down to you was such a ridiculous turn on you wanted to scream into your hands. People never spoke down to you. Not your teachers, or other classmates, not even your parents had ever spoken down to you. It was thrilling to be spoken to like this.
“You don’t have to fuck me…” You didn’t want to say it so casually like he was. “There.”
“I don’t,” Jeonghan agreed. “But you want me to, don’t you?”
You shook your head, closing your eyes in embarrassment.
“Did you get ready for me?” He asked you, his voice again heightened in amusement.
You shook your head, but your thoughts turned to the what to do before anal google search you had done before coming here.
You would be joking if you said you hadn’t really been hoping this night would take this turn. You would be just straight lying if you said you hadn’t done most of what the google results had told you.
But to finger yourself there? That was humiliating.
As your thoughts raced, you felt Jeonghan close the distance between you two. He tapped your cheek, and you felt your eyes flutter open. You were staring up at Jeonghan whose face was framed in his hair falling forward from looking down at you.
“You like it when I talk down to you,” he murmured softly. “I bet you’d really like it if I was a bit more physical.”
Again, you wanted to scream but you kept your face as straight as you could keep it.
“You want me to hurt you?” He continued; his voice so airy that you nearly missed the question. You pressed your lips together, and you nodded once. His eyes narrowed. “I need it vocal.”
“Yes.”
You were immediately slapped, hard across your face. You stumbled, grabbing Jeonghan’s arm to keep yourself steady just at the surprise of being hit.
“Say it louder.”
You looked up at Jeonghan, your pupils blown. You had always wondered what it would feel like to be hit by someone. Always fantasized about it, weakly slapping yourself while listening to strangers on reddit’s gonewildaudio’s subreddit degrade you. But that didn’t hold a candle to the way that hit made you feel. Your pussy clamped around nothing, and your fingers dug into Jeonghan’s arm.
“Oh my god yes, please,” you blurted before you could feel shame for your excitement. “Please hurt me, It feels s-so good.”
You wanted to cry, because you needed Jeonghan to touch you more. You needed his fingers inside you. You wanted his cock inside of you.
The excitement was thrumming through your body. You hadn’t even seen Jeonghan’s cock yet.
Jeonghan forced your chin up.
“You would give a shitty blowjob,” Jeonghan commented as if he could read your mind. “I don’t feel like teaching you how to take cock down your throat properly.”
Jeonghan took you by your shoulder, and walked you over to his desk, bending you forcibly over it. You moaned as your cheek pressed into the cold wood.
“You want me to stop,” he mumbled. “Just use your safeword. I know you’re good at listening.”
“Okay,” you breathed.
Jeonghan’s hand came down on your ass hard, jolting your entire body.
“Let’s see…” He mumbled, ignoring your yelp. He knelt down in front of you, his thumbs coming to your folds and spreading them for him. “Your pussy still looks like it needs a cock in it.”
He sighed as if he was disappointed in you. You let your forehead hit the desk. He pushed two of his fingers into you, and as he did so he was clicking his tongue.
“And you’re dripping like a bitch in heat all over me…” He continued. He pulled his fingers out of you after only a few pumps and ran them through your folds as if to try and gather all of the wetness.
“Let’s see if you’re even wet enough for this…” Jeonghan slid his now soaked fingers up to your asshole, pushing lightly to see if your rim would give. He didn’t try very hard and instead took his head.
“Yeah… You definitely aren’t ready for this,” he mumbled. But as he did, you felt a different one of his fingers dragging through your wetness and then pushing at your asshole. He forced the finger into you, forcing a moan out of you.
“Well, my pinky can fit, so I guess you’re not a completely lost cause,” he murmured. You kicked one of your feet into the ground, fighting the urge to push back on Jeonghan because the burn of just his pinky finger inside of you was absolutely intoxicating. You felt like you were going to explode, you wanted him to do more, you wanted him to put more in you.
“Je-Jeonghan,” you said, but your voice was small and shaky as he eased his pinky in and out of you. “I-I can take more.”
Jeonghan hummed, ignoring you.
“Jeonghan,” you moaned again, shimmying your ass. “I want you to fuck me with more.”
Jeonghan slapped your ass and you lost his finger completely.
“You’re rushing it,” Jeonghan chided. “You really want me to just pull out my dick and start fucking you when you’ve never even fingered your ass before.”
Your face burned so hot you were glad that he couldn’t see. You wondered what it would be like if he did just fuck your ass right there. You wondered how big he was, and how big he would feel with just his tip forcing it’s way past-
Your thoughts were interrupted by Jeonghan beginning to push a bigger finger into you, and you pushed back against it. You were so tight that it was a bit of an effort to try and even get his finger further into you. His other hand gripped at your waist.
“You’re so impatient it’s making me a bit angry,” he warned, and you hoped that he left bruises on your hips from how hard he was holding you. Jeonghan began again, to work his finger in and out of you, but he was taking his time and you were getting impatient. More impatient than before.
Jeonghan began to ease a second finger into you, making you hit your palm against his desk. God, you needed more. You had never come without a vibrator, but right now you felt like you were going to come just on Jeonghan’s fingers alone.
“You were right,” you bit out, hoping he was listening. “I should have asked Hansol to get me drugs. Cause he would already be fucking me by now.”
Your words had the desired affect even though, at first you thought you had really fucked up. Jeonghan left you completely, slapping your ass hard.
“You want it like that?” He asked you. You swallowed hard and just as you were about to apologize you heard a zipper. Moments later you felt something fat and heavy hit your back.
“You want to play that game?” Jeonghan asked. He grabbed you by your hair and pulled you up from the desk. You cried out in surprise as you were flipped around and hiked up onto his desk. Jeonghan let his heavy cock land on your bare pussy and he grabbed you roughly by both sides of your face, dragging you into a rough, possessive kiss. He broke it just when you thought you were going to suffocate.
“What were you going to do if you went to Hansol then?” H asked. “Cause I promise you, Hansol won’t fuck you the way that I’m going to.”
He pulled back wrapping both of his hands to hit your clit with his heavy cock. You jumped at each hit, feeling like you’d get yelled at for grabbing him so instead you grabbed at the edges of Jeonghan’s desk.
“I bet you Hansol would have been so gentle, probably would have talked you through all this shit, praised you for how frankly stupid you are at this,” Jeonghan mumbled. He shook his head and rubbed his bare tip between your slick folds. “But I’m not even going to fuck you with a condom.”
He grabbed the back of your neck, pushing so that your eyes were forced to look down at where his cock was teasing your entrance.
“Because even cheap whores can’t argue with a paying customer. Because they’ll take whatever they get.”
He forced his cock into you all at once, and you screamed at the sudden thrust. You had fucked yourself countless times on dildos that honestly did compare to Jeonghan’s width and length, but you still felt like you had never been fucked by anything before. The base of his cock stretched you so hard that you felt tears begin to trail down your cheeks, but it felt so good that you didn’t want Jeonghan to stop.
Jeonghan moved one of his hands to your shoulder, and the other to your hip so that he could begin to force his fat cock into your pussy that had only just been spread open enough for this to feel pleasant. You were starting to think that you shouldn’t have been so hasty with the anal because at this rate you didn’t think he would fuck your ass at all.
Not that you cared too much. His fingers dug into your shoulders as his groans filled the air, cock twitching everytime it pushed too far in because it drug a yelp out of you everytime and made you clench hard around Jeonghan’s cock. He let his forehead drop forward, against yours, and he shook his head against yours.
“God you’re so stupid you don’t even know how you’re supposed to act during your first time,” Jeonghan mumbled. “You aren’t supposed to want it this rough. You aren’t supposed to talk about other men.”
Jeonghan accentuated his points with his thrusts, and he nudged your nose with his, smashing your lips together again. You tried to keep up with him, but to be completely honest you were pretty much solely moaning against his lips. You couldn’t even respond to anything he was saying you were just nodded when you could, screaming into his mouth with each deep thrust.
Of course, once again, you had that pleasure ripped away from you.
A frustrated sob left your lips, but it was interrupted by a soft kiss from Jeonghan.
“Oh don’t worry angel, we’re just getting started,” he whispered against your lips. You were a bit confused by his words but then he was dragging you off the desk again, bending you back over it, the tip of his cock pressing against your tight asshole.
“You want me to fuck your ass? Then it would be my pleasure.”
He had to hold your hips tightly (both to get himself into you and to stop your wiggles of anticipation). It took a moment (you suspected he was going easy on you), before finally his tip was into you. You both let out matching moans and he weakly bent over your body, burying his face in the back of your neck.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck, you are so tight,” he blabbered nonsensically. He pushed further into you, and the burn and stretch of his cock in your ass felt so good that you had to push your fist into your mouth, biting down hard on it to keep from screaming too loud.
“You’re such a slut y/n,” Jeonghan babbled as he pushed into you. “Good kids like you shouldn’t act like this. Good kids like you shouldn’t let bad guys like me fuck you. We don’t treat you right.”
You whined into your fist, shaking your head to shake off his words. This felt too good. Your pussy was clamping on air, dripping all over his desk and on your thighs. Jeonghan held you still until he had finally pushed all the way into you, his head raising so that he could thread his fingers back into your hair.
“Such a bad little slut,” he mumbled, and then he began to pull out. At first his thrusts were slow, because you were so tight there was nothing else that he could do. But as he continued, he grabbed at your other wrist, and trapped it behind your back so that he could hear you.
You were a mess of tears, and pleasure, the burn of his cock as he began to fuck you hard and fast and your moans could probably be heard by the entire floor.
“God, you feel so fucking good,” he mumbled against your skin, his teeth bit down on the back of your neck. “I like this so much… Did you think of the consequences to your actions before doing this? Coming here? Asking me to fuck you?”
You shook your head silently, and it wasn’t enough for him, his other hand circled around your body and his fingers pressed to your down to your pussy.
You sobbed out in complete and utter pleasure.
“Do you know what I’m going to do to you?” He asked you as suddenly his fingers pressed into your pussy, three fingers filling you up so full that for a second you forgot how to breathe.
“I’m going to cum in your fucking ass and watch it drip out of your ass and into your pretty little pussy how do you like that?”
You nodded, and finally were able to find the words.
“Yes Jeonghan please, I need that so badly, want you to cum in my ass, please please-“
As you begged you started to feel something warm spurt deep in your ass. Your forehead hit the desk, as you sobbed in pleasure, feeling an orgasm rip through so powerful that your vision briefly blurred, your entire body shaking.
It wasn’t until he finally, stopped thrusting, his cock still buried deep in your ass that you even realized what a mess you were making of his desk. You were crying, you knew that for sure, and suddenly Jeonghan pulled you up by the strands of your hair.
“How does that feel angel? Do you feel good?” He asked you, his tone again condescending.
“G-good,” you admitted shamelessly. “Th-Than-nk you.”
Jeonghan hummed and pushed you back into the desk. He slipped his cock out of your now used ass, and then plugged it with three of his fingers. His hand left your hair, and you felt his cock head tease at the entrance of your pussy.
“Clearly, I haven’t taught you a good enough lesson. You aren’t supposed to like this. You are pure, the perfect kid on campus.”
He pushed his cock into your pussy in one full push.
“Oh god-”
“Don’t you want to protect your image?” He asked you. “You really want everyone to know that Yoon Jeonghan fucked both of your sloppy holes and left cum in them?”
Excitement thrummed your body.
“Y-Yes.”
You wished you could say that you were thinking about using the safe word he had provided you earlier but you didn’t care about that at all. You were sobbing just from the pleasure of it all. So excited at the prospect of having your pussy full of cum. You had always wondered what that was like. You already loved the feeling of Jeonghan’s cum in your ass. The feeling of his fingers keeping it plugged up.
He didn’t have to fuck you long before you were coming on his cock.
And that dragged him over the edge as well.
The warm spurts of cum in your pussy were completely different from the toys you had played with to try and simulate this feeling before.
As soon as Jeonghan finished filling your pussy with his cum he took a step back, his warmth leaving your body.
Both of your whole felt empty, your clit desperate for attention despite having come just from Jeonghan’s cock already.
You moaned as you felt his cum beginning to drip out of your ass and down to your pussy, which was also dripping cum, presumably onto Jeonghan’s floor.
“You look so pathetic,” Jeonghan said, that condescending tone still there. “A virgin fucked to tears and yet somehow you seem so grateful.”
He sighed and then his hands were soothing over the small of your back. You preened into his touch, steady breaths leaving your lips as he guided you up. Your body was still shaking a bit so when he turned you around all he did was wrap his arms around your body, pressing your back to the desk as he hugged you tightly.
He stood there completely silent for a few minutes, making sure not to say anything. After a while, your head drooped tiredly onto his shoulder and he sighed, pressing a small kiss to the side of your neck.
“How’re you feeling?” He asked you softly. You felt a bit embarrassed that he was reassuring you.
“I feel fine,” you mumbled. “Like I’ll be a bit sore tomorrow…”
His cum dripped down your thighs.
“But isn’t that what everyone’s first is like?”
Jeonghan eased you back by your shoulders so that you could see him.
“I thought firsts didn’t matter?” He asked. Your face began to burn red again.
“They don’t…” You murmured, a smile crossing your face. “But it was a pretty good first.”
You were tired, but excitement still strummed through your body.
“Yeah, my first time I was slapped, fucked over a desk, and he came in both my ass and my pussy,” you said as if you were telling the story to someone. “Oh and it was an infamous bad boy who did it.”
Jeonghan laughed at your words.
“We have a communal bathroom,” he said. “But I’ll sneak you into the boys one so you can get clean in peace. I’ll help you shower.”
“Oh aftercare,” you teased lightly. Jeonghan gave you a somewhat amused look.
“How come you were so embarrassed to ask me to fuck you that you came under the guise of needing drugs, but now you are smiling and laughing while your cunt and your ass drip my cum.”
He made a good point.
“Dream come true…” You murmured, your voice barely above a whisper. Then after a few moments: “Wait does that mean you’re not going to get me drugs?”
“No,” Jeonghan said with a laugh. “I told you to go to Hansol if you wanted to smoke some weed.”
You gaped at him, but he just pushed you back by your forehead a bit while he rummaged through his things to get some clothes.
“Hey Hansol, I need some weed,” you mumbled. “Don’t worry you can fuck me any-“
Jeonghan was back on you in an instant, his fingers digging into your shoulder, just by your collarbone.
“Don’t offer random people to fuck your ass.”
His gaze on you was a bit scary… Unwavering. You pressed your lips together and nodded once.
“You shouldn’t let people fuck you without a condom either,” he continued, sounding a bit unamused. “Or cum in your ass. If you’re going to be a slut, you could get something… You should just fuck one person.”
A beat passed as you realized what he was saying. Your pressed look turned into a smile.
“You mean-”
“Don’t overthink it,” he grumbled. “I’m going to get so much shit if it gets out that I took your virginity so just… Keep everything on the down low, okay?”
You nodded excitedly.
“Yeah. DL, I got it.”
Jeonghan looked at you like he didn’t quite believe you.
“Promise!”
Finally, he relented and handed you a t-shirt.
“But no drugs,” he mumbled. “You don’t need to start doing that shit. I’m not going to fuck you if you smell like weed all the time.”
“Got it!” You agreed. “No drugs.”
Jeonghan sighed and shook his head at your eagerness.
“And you’re staying the night. Can’t have you walking home after this or anything.”
Again, the idea was a bit exciting.
“Virginity taken and a sleep ov-”
Jeonghan shoved the shirt you hadn’t yet taken in your face with a sigh as he realized that fucking you, wasn’t going to be like fucking most people.
“Come on, you’re dripping cum all over the floor.”
You pulled the shirt out of your face enough to smile at him.
“Thank you Jeonghan.”
He sighed.
“You did good y/n, you did really good.”
And then he helped you get his shirt on and get you to the bathroom.
Taglist: @vintageot5, @woo8hao, @toruro, @wonudazed, @kkakkameori
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wildest fantasies.
pairing. itoshi rin, shidou ryusei, karasu tabito, otoya eita, yukimiya kenyu, nagi seishiro x f!reader
content warnings. MINORS & AGELESS BLOGS DNI, nsfw, how the top 6 imagine fucking you, dom!character x sub!reader, vary in each installment, some are prevalent than others (oops), written in lowercase
itoshi rin. breeding kink, creampie, degradation, edging, fingering, jealousy, marking, possessive behavior, wall sex
mine is written on your skin with invisible ink. he fumes at a player from his team talking to you, who seems to be having fun when he sees you laugh. he doesn’t experience rage quite often, but that guy is the initial point and gets worse when the poster boy of blue lock strikes up a conversation with you.
“what’s with the silent treatment, rin?” you become frustrated over the lack of dialogue. the entire ride on the way home was tense and he treated you like a ghost. he also feels the same, but for different reasons. as the two of you enter your house, he pins you to the door with both arms above your head and cunt on his knee. you attempt to focus on lust in his eyes as his tongue battles against yours and teeth nips at your throat to leave bruises in its wake.
“craving attention from him out of all people, hm? fucking slut.” you gasp at the sharp friction of his knee against your cunt. he isn’t this rough and riled up, not that you’re complaining. he slips his fingers inside, pumping them in and out very slowly as punishment. “think he can fuck you like this? lukewarm, want him and everyone else to know that you’re mine.”
to prolong this type of behavior, you instill delicious images in his head. “how are you gonna show me off? the hickeys, sure. but what about a ring on my finger? your cum dripped out of me? or perhaps a baby in me?”
he pulls his fingers out when you’re nearing an orgasm, leaving you a whining mess. the impulse to buy a fancy ring with his salary and propose to you live, to fuck you in the locker rooms to see copious amounts of cum staining your underwear, and to fuck you enough to make you pregnant so that damn golden boy can mind his own business — which he’ll gladly make it happen. he rams his cock in you without warning and spends the entire day in the bedroom to make sure it takes.
“ah, there you are. i had to ask one of your teammates, but we lost track.” he’s back in the stadium, dazed from his daydreaming. you didn’t notice him blanking out as you’re busy geeking out about his plays. “watching a match in-person was so exciting! i get to see you steal a ball by kicking it between another player’s legs and score a goal with a direct shot— is that it? whatever, you’re so cool, rin!”
he shuts you up by kissing you, and everyone in the stadium reacts in a domino effect. the cameras pan to the two of you so it’s on live television, his fans freak out that he’s actually in a relationship, and his teammates — specifically that guy — are in pure disbelief. you wonder why he had done that, but he looks proud so you didn’t pry any further. “there. now the whole world knows.”
shidou ryusei. anal sex, blowjob, cuckolding, exhibitionism, face fucking, impact play (spanking), shower sex
demon is what everyone refers to him as. known to be vicious in the field, people hate to admit that he’s a damn good player. aside from being skilled at soccer, he’s also skilled at pulling risque acts in the context of yourself — willing to let the whole world know how tight you are. right now he’s fucking you from behind in the shower with hands on the wall and back slightly bent to stabilize yourself from his powerful thrusts.
“shit, you’re even tighter than yesterday!” he howls as his thick and wide cock drags along your walls and slaps your ass multiple times, leaving a red handprint there. this is a position favored by the both of you, and it never gets old. although, you do want to try out other things that you and he can find exciting. what he says afterwards is an adventure you can’t wait to embark on.
“i wonder if eyelashes will agree with me. how about we invite him someday?” you’d like that very much, honored to be acknowledged as a favorite pastime by the best player in japan. for now you want to practice sucking your boyfriend off, so you detach from him and kneel in front of his dick, lapping the bulbous tip with your tongue.
“holy shit, you’re tight here too! fucking hell… i dunno which one i like more but let’s find out, hm?” he shoves his cock deep into your throat and grips your head as he bucks his hips, eyes rolling to the back of his skull at how stimulating it is.
“feeling so fucking good. looking so fucking good, too. i bet you’ll do even better at the shower stalls in the locker rooms. or at a bar. or at an alley. or—” it’s incredible how he manages to talk about his shameless ideas when he’s at the verge of cumming whereas on the other hand you phased out. streams of opaque white gush out past your lips and trickle down your chin. his dick is still hard, meaning he’s ready for another round. his stamina is inhuman, like a demon. but knowing him, he won’t be satisfied until he has tried out every single thing on his growing list.
“can’t believe you took a nap during our bath. was expecting you to be more awake from the bath bomb i bought, but i guess not.” he’s greeted with a sweet peck, eyes fluttering halfway but can see you beaming at him brightly like the lights in the room. “got your towel here. now i have to drain the water, so shoo.”
he wraps his towel around his waist and then observes you unplug the drain. he happens to sneak a peek at the curve of your ass when you bend over to reach it, smug at how he happens to catch wind of how glorious the view is. he startles you by pinching the fat of your cheeks, and you turn to him, completely flustered. “what? want me to do it again?”
karasu tabito. aftercare, hand holding/kissing, insecurities, loss of virginity, missionary, petnames (baby), praise
sorry is your automatic reply when he hints that he wants to have sex. you’re a virgin; the thought of being unable to satisfy someone, especially one experienced such as himself, is deeply rooted in your head. on the contrary, it’s a huge turn on. since it’s your first time, he wants to make it extra special. it makes him more excited than he should be so he tries to tone it down to not scare you.
he reaches for your face, staring at him like a lost puppy. he smirks at how entranced you are when his fingers slide to your chin then glide over your lips. he kisses you hard, taking your breath away as he gently pushes you down on the bed. he gives you time to breathe while he takes off his shirt. you looking intently on him makes his heart flutter, that his body is for your eyes only.
“i’m okay. you can keep going,” you tell him when he checks up on you. with the slight encouragement of his hand drawing circles on your skin, you take off your shirt as well so he can explore more of your body. the two of you eventually strip yourselves to bareness in the midst of devouring each other with tongue and spit.
“squeeze if you want me to stop.” your hand is intertwined with his, ready to signal for the sake of your safety. he slowly penetrates you, his cock buried to the hilt inside your pussy. he blabbers about how you’re taking him so well, swearing he’ll cum faster than expected. he hooks a leg on his shoulder which allows him to thrust into you harder and deeper. the pitch of your voice rises higher and higher, you pull him toward your mouth to crash your lips against his. you hate how you sound it seems, but rest assured, it tells him that he has done his job right.
“shit, baby. you’re so perfect for me. how is this possible— agh,” he hisses out as he spills inside you. you’ve gone exhausted afterwards, skin sensitive from the caresses on your curves and kisses on your hands. this is what he’d like to happen, but the next time he blinks, you’re lying beside him fully clothed, meaning that the scenario is anything but real.
“tabito? you’re not saying anything.” you avert your gaze from his. you’re ashamed of literally pushing him away, believing that he’ll take offense judging from his silence. “i didn’t mean to do that. it happened so fast that i freaked out. can we start over and… start a little bit slower?”
“sure. let’s take things slow, then.” he kisses your forehead as a way to reassure you that you haven’t done anything wrong. somehow it makes you bolder, being the one to initiate the kiss while sneaking your hands under his shirt unconsciously. you immediately retract from the sudden move and are about to apologize for acting out of the blue. he cuts off a smile, gesturing you to keep on going. he’s so weak for you, and he’ll do anything to make you happy.
otoya eita. begging, cunnilingus, mutual masturbation, nipple play, phone sex, toxic relationships (with reader’s ex)
relief washes over him hearing that you broke up with your former significant other through the phone. he never liked them to begin with and doesn’t understand what you see in them. being the good friend he is, he wants what's best for you. yet he decides to remain civil, albeit painfully. though, it’s not as painful as suppressing his sinful thoughts about you crumbling under touch.
“eita? can you do me a favor?” he loves your voice, but you saying his name is his greatest weakness. instead of heading it wirelessly, he’d prefer you moaning it in his ears when he’s railing you into a begging mess. he should feel guilty for harboring these feelings as he promised to play the ‘good friend’ role. but promises are meant to be broken anyway. “can you make me forget about them?”
the lines of friendship blur into indescribable tension. you express your frustration over the shitty quality of your sex life your former partner provided, rambling about how badly you want to be fucked on someone’s mouth. the cries of your nipples and clit aching to be touched causes his cock to strain in his pants. sex isn’t a topic you confide in with your friends, especially your male friends, but now it doesn’t matter. you called him to forget after all.
“to tell you the truth, you’ve been driving me crazy,” he sighs with his head leaned back as he pumps his length. labored breaths and whimpers are heard on your end; it seems you have the same idea. “so you want me to make you forget? what if i tell you i’m jerking off right now, wishing that i was inside that pretty pussy of yours? what about you, wishing that my mouth is there too and on your pretty tits to claim what has been mine in the first place?”
“i’m yours, always yours. please, faster!” your whines become more frequent that he cums on his hand and some on his thighs. he leans against the headboard, catching his breath alongside you. if you’re here, he’d leave more proof that you’re forever his with no room for your ex in your world as it should. yet it’s all white noise. the entire time he has been blanking out, so you were waiting for an eternity for him to say something.
“hello? earth to eita?” he snaps back to reality. the only real thing is the stickiness of his hand that’s covered in cum, so he really has been mindlessly jacking off to your voice. “i asked if you can do me a favor but i think i rather stop by your place to cool off. is it okay if i come over?”
“yeah, sure.” you thank him before hanging up. he tosses his phone to the edge of the bed, contemplating what he has done. never, ever again will he do this and vows to not speak on it. all he can do is to stick being the ‘good friend’ to comfort you through your breakup. he’ll do whatever it takes to prove he’s the better choice. they’ll be the day where you’re all his for the taking.
yukimiya kenyu. body worship, mirror sex, lap dancing, lingerie, riding, sex toys, strip tease, voyeurism
risk is his middle name. not only taking it to become the top striker in japan, but in the context of having strong urges to impale you on him. it’s confined in his pants, just like how his hands are confined to his sides. he’s restricted to ogle at your body clad in lace lingerie, attempting to tempt him to give into his desires with your alluring expressions.
the lingerie surprise tips him over the edge. he follows your fingers running down your breasts to your clit, agonized by the drag of one of them along the lips back and forth. he grips his seat to the point where he can almost break the bones of his hands. oh how badly he wants you, but being the menace you are, you keep insisting to stay patient until the end of your performance.
“mmm, not yet. keep your eyes on me,” you giggle, lifting his chin to face you with your mouth ghosting over his. you’re enjoying the sight way too much, but how can he also feel the same when you’re torturing him with the sway of your hips on his lap, the flex of your muscles when he glances at the many mirrors around him, and the teasing of your bra straps down past your shoulders? and when you also grind on his bulge along with a vibrator plugging in you which is your source of pleasure instead?
as if his body has a mind of its own, he finds himself dancing with you with an arm wrapped around your waist and the other cradling your head, kissing you with his life. then clothes start to fly off left and right. he yanks out your vibrator decorated with your slick and plunges you onto his throbbing cock, having you seated for his part of the performance. oh how the tables have turned; now you’re the one being tortured, pounded with quick upward thrusts from him.
“now for the grand finale.” despite your protests to slow down, he wants to relish your face and body contorting in pleasure through the mirror beside him. a multitude of thrusts later, he reaches his climax and feels your walls clench to make sure you didn’t miss a single drop. it’s a shame that time goes by so fast, because he sure wants to see your body arch for him over and over again.
“you know, it’s rude to stare without saying anything.” loud noises flood his ears. he’s in the mall on a shopping spree with you to help you pick out new clothes to spice up your wardrobe. although when you mean by ‘spice up’, he doesn’t expect to see you in lace lingerie at the fitting rooms. “so, uh… what do you think?”
he has speculations on whether you may have a hidden agenda to seduce him or just trying it out for fun. but all he do is marvel at how the lingerie fits nicely on your body, making you nervous. an idea pops into his head and whispers into the shell of your ear. “not sure. why don’t you buy and put it on tonight for me so i can see it better, hm?”
nagi seishiro. bulge kink, cockwarming, size difference (reader is implied to be smaller), somnophilia, spooning
warm is his favorite sensation when he’s curled up with you in bed. his chest is on your back and his left arm hugs your corresponding side while the other engulfs your right hand. his cock throbs inside you which can be seen poking your stomach, making him curse and groan as he places his hand there. the feeling is delicious, addicting even, and he’s hungry for more.
he pants against your neck as he lazily thrusts against your ass, the outline of the bulge moving up and down from what he can feel on his hand. so good, he chokes out in your ear, followed by a string of fucks and moans. that manages to wake you up, having you grab on the sheets from being overwhelmed by the pleasure from behind.
“sei…” his impatience causes your breath to hitch. at that moment you’re losing your damn mind upon his balls coming into contact with your skin. “fill me up…”
as he shushes you to go back to sleep, he kisses the junction of your neck and shoulder and hooks a leg over your waist for better access to pick up the pace to fulfill your wish. “mm, yeah. gonna make you so warm and full of me.”
“hm, sei?” the morning light seeps through the blinds, spotlighting on you who’s sitting up on his bed stretching. for some reason, you press your butt against his groin which is painfully— oh. “um, did you get hard from sleeping with me last night?”
it’s a dream after all. he throws the blanket over his head and turns away from you, refusing to answer as it’ll be bothersome to explain in detail. you dismiss his silence with ‘okay’ and by telling him you have to go to work. when you reach the edge of the bed, he pins you down with his arm around your waist and drags you closer to him.
“stay with me. just a bit longer.” you cave into his whims, deciding to indulge him during then by pulling your pants down to take his huge length. it somehow knocks you out, and he hopes that you’ll forgive him for making you late. but you’re so warm and so good, just like in his dreams.
vera. ayo, finally i posted something. it’s my first time writing smut and i died inside. as expected: it’s 10% smut, 90% cringe. the top 6 has me in a chokehold and i’m not okay.
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𝐅𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐂𝐀𝐋𝐋
summary: a siren attack is already unfortunate, but it's worse if it also reveals some truths about your insufferable crew mate
pairing: pirate! hawks x gn! pirate! reader
warnings: just a silly drabble to get back into writing and exorcise some of my hawks brainrot; a little suggestive at the end
general masterlist
Getting stuck on the same ship as Takami Keigo was one of life’s most torturous challenges. At least for you. He was obnoxiously arrogant and, much to your chagrin, people flocked to him like seagulls to a forgotten loaf of bread.
Sure, your fellow pirate was quite easy on the eyes and rather charming when he wanted to be; a truth you would only ever admit in the comfort of your own head, lest you inflate his ego even further. Instead, you rather grumbled to yourself, cursing his name for getting to sit pretty in the crow’s nest while you sat on deck and mended a torn net.
“Having fun down there?” If the devil ever spoke to you, you were sure he would mimic the grating lilt of Keigo’s melodic voice. “You know, I’m pretty sure a whale could swim through the holes you’re leaving.”
He was your crew mate, he was an essential part of the expedition, you couldn’t just shoot him down.
“At least one of us is doing their job,” you deadpanned, not even giving him the satisfaction to look up. “You know, I think an island could sneak up on us with how distracted you are.”
“Oh you think you’re distracting me?” Even with your eyes trained on the cords in your hands, you could picture the cocky tilt of his head, a dashing grin playing around his lips. “Is that the kind of effect you want to have on me?”
“You’re the one who’s always coming up to bother me, so if anything you’re the one who’s obsessed with me.” If this conversation went on for any longer, your medic would have to patch up a popped vein on your part.
“Ah there is that wishful thinking again,” he laughed and this time you glared up at his silhouette standing out against the blinding sun. As always, he wore loose beige pants and the top buttons of his black shirt were undone, showing more of his toned chest than you needed to see. His black boots were propped up against the nest’s railing and the crimson head scarf fluttering in the breeze matched the earring dangling from his left lobe.
Just as you were about to retort, another shadow against the sun caught your attention. Drawing your pistol, you undid the safety, alerting the rest of the crew that there was something coming.
But before you could see what exactly was approaching, you suddenly lost your balance as the ship developed a heavy list. Grabbing onto the mast of the crow’s nest, you managed to steady yourself, yet the impact knocked the revolver from your grip. As you looked up, the first thing you saw was the massive cliffs your ship was heading towards, sharp rocks littering the waters, waiting to demolish its wooden bottom.
Then your eyes locked on to the crew’s navigator, whose head lulled from one side to the other as he firmly steered you towards your demise. Next to him, holding his attention, was a beautiful woman sweetly tracing a finger along his jaw as she sang to him. As a feather drifted past your eyes, it suddenly hit you what -or who- exactly you were dealing with.
“Cover your ears!” You shouted to no one in particular as you scrambled for the wax you had stuffed into your pocket. With your hearing muffled, your own heartbeat raced in your ears as you dove for your pistol and breathlessly aimed for the siren attached to your navigator, who by now was half way towards the ship’s railing, his feet dragging underneath him as the woman lured him further towards the water.
You weren’t sure if your bullet was enough to actually kill the siren but upon impact it dissolved into a burst of feathers and released its hold on your crew mate, who dazedly blinked as he tried to regain his senses.
The next few minutes were a blur of talons, feathers and pulling your crew back from the ship’s edge, even tying some of them to the masts to make sure they wouldn’t try to kill themselves again.
Soon enough, however, you were out of bullets and you reluctantly drew the dagger previously secured to your thigh, scanning the area for more sirens when someone tapped your shoulder. Whirling around you slashed your dagger in an arc around you, only to find Keigo standing in front of you, holding up his hands innocently. There was an easy going smile on his face as he said something you couldn’t understand, so you removed one of the wax beads restricting your hearing.
And that was your mistake.
Only a few heartbeats after his velvety voice reached your ears, your dagger clattered onto the deck as Keigo reached out to unplug your other ear as well, his fingers grazing your cheek with nails much sharper than you expected. You wondered if his lips would be as plush as you imagined them to be or if his hair would be as soft as it looked when you buried your fingers in it.
His amber eyes were trained entirely on you as he gave you a coy gaze, inviting you to take another step towards him, to find out for yourself, to sate your curiosity. Likewise, you couldn’t tear your eyes away from him either as your feet followed his graceful movements, the light reflecting of his golden hair like a halo, the crimson wings on his back completing his angelic appearance—
Then, Keigo dissolved into a burst of those same scarlet feathers as two sharp swords sliced through his torso. For a moment, you thought you had imagined it when the same face came back into view again.
With full force, the noise of the ship reached you again and you staggered backwards at the sudden onslaught of stimuli. Around you, the crew was running around, untying people and frantically steering the ship back onto the right course as you raced to regain your bearings, disoriented by the orders being bellowed around you.
“That should be the last of them,” Keigo ripped you from your daze, his voice clearer as the sea as he sheathed his swords again. “Nasty creatures, those sirens. Though I guess this one was a handsome fellow, considering you were dazedly mumbling my name on your way overboard.”
Your lips pressed into a thin line when your brain caught up to your current situation. Perhaps the siren had been taken care off, yet you were still tempted to throw yourself head first over the railing. Justifiably so, you thought when your eyes darted to the man’s face long enough to confirm the self-satisfied expression he was wearing.
“I am quite flattered really,” he mused, one hand reaching out to tilt your face up so you’d meet his eyes as he stepped closer to you. For a split-second, the thought that it was still a siren in front of you crossed your mind. “To think that a siren would choose to wear my face in an effort to seduce you… now isn’t that quite the compliment?”
“Just… shut up and let me die in peace, would you?” You rolled your eyes, ready to retreat into your little cabin and try to grapple with your near-death experience, this confrontation included. If only the rocky spikes had ripped open the bottom of the ship, you could sink to the sea floor in quiet solitude.
“No no no, why would you do that when you can stay right here with me? C’mon just see it as my reward for saving your precious life, treasure.” He sent you a cheeky wink, drawing your attention to the sharp slant of his eyes and your heart, the treacherous thing, skipped a beat.
“Is your idea of a reward torturing me further? Or what could you possibly get out of this?” Your shoulders sacked with your sigh, resigning to your defeat.
“What I’m getting out of this? It’s quite obvious isn’t it?” Slinging an arm around your hanging shoulders, Keigo pulled you flush to his side. Warmth and the scent of salt mixed with something woodsy radiated off of him and you could admit this wasn’t the worst position to be in. “Believe it or not, I do enjoy your company.”
“That is hard to believe, you’re right.” You cocked your head in suspicion. “Normally you do everything to get under my skin, so what changed?”
“Hmm, I wonder why that is,” Keigo’s melodic timbre lilted before transitioning into his typical pearly laughter. Then, as if sharing a secret, he leant down so his lips were dangerously close to your ear, his voice dropping low. “You know, you weren’t the only one visited by a siren. As tempting as that version of you looked, I must say I prefer the real deal.
“Do you think I could get you to sing for me as well?”
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Ah, morning. Hot coffee in my favourite mug, a sun-dappled veranda on the balcony of my rural French palace, and a quick peek at the newspaper to see how my favourite NASCAR driver, Rusty "Piss" Trickle, placed last night. Now, just to take a big sip of scalding hot Blue Mountain before I read the results...
No, of course you know what I know. Rusty didn't podium. Hell, he didn't even place. He got, once again, ejected from the venue for trying to crush a full can of beer with his helmet-mounted GoPro at 180 miles an hour on the roval. Before the race had even started.
His utter collapse in the face of competition doesn't impact my life materially, although tens of thousands of motorsports fans across the world peg their emotional states to the success or failure of their favourite racists. And you can see why. In early childhood, we all want to have heroes. Originally, they're characters of fiction, or idealized representations of actual jobs. Firefighter. Paramedic. Home Depot guy who unlocks the saw when your mom needs to rip some planks.
This is innate to the human experience. We see folks doing exemplary things, helping their communities, getting glory, and we want to do that too. Maybe we start adopting some of their mannerisms. For a few weeks as a nine-year-old, I kept harassing my parents with the catchphrase of my favourite television star, the 1989 Lincoln Mark VII LSC. I can quote it now, to this day: "vroom."
As we age, those heroes often become specific people. We become invested in them, in an unhealthy parasocial way. For instance, I once sent Rusty ten dollars in Streamer Superchat® because he posted a livestream of himself driving across a cornfield in a stolen MG Midget. Ten dollars. I don't even give my actual human friends gas money for transporting my ungrateful ass across the country when I drop a cylinder liner. So you can see how folks go absolutely apeshit when their favourite football team scores an insufficient amount of touchdowns, or a hockey squad fails to behead the referee in time to prevent a power play.
Is there a cure for this sort of unhealthy fixation? Probably not. Becoming disillusioned with your heroes, or ruining your entire day because a bunch of millionaires failed to win a competition, is natural. Maybe it's best that we target folks far away from our communities, because the guy at Home Depot who works the saw gets real nervous when I carry a giant foam finger into the place and cheer on his rough cuts. And that creates a really dangerous situation, even if it makes it much more exciting.
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You ohhhandedly mentioned tessai livong through ww2 and… wow thats true there were a lot of characters that got a first row seat to both conflicts, even if only the second was really impactful on japans history. Does urahara, yoruichi, tessai, the vizored or any of the shinigami have any specific feelings on ww2/the nuclear bombs? I know its a wild fucking question but it literally just occurred to me and i cant stop thinking about it.
Yeah WW2 is an entire 5-chapter arc in the fic because apparently Kubo is from Hiroshima, and Karakura town is based on his memories growing up there. Stuff that happens during that arc:
The Soul Society's sole warning that something catastrophic might be coming is the arrival of an irradiated and enraged Coyote spirit from the Trinidad test site.
It's up to Newly-appointed captain Komamura to calm it down and explain what happened, and Mayuri is able to work out that atomic weapons are real from it's descriptions. He gives Soul Society about a month before the humans drop one on a city.
Unfortunately, he's correct.
***
Urahara and the Visoreds use the fact that they're already dead to mitigate some of the damage from the bombing by walking into the epicenter and shoving carbon rods into the most radioactive points, stemming much of the radiation damage, but there's nothing they can do for the initial wave of destruction.
It involves going through a new gigai every trip and learning what if feels like to have the flesh actually melt off your bones, but Hirako Shinji and the other Visored are no cowards, least of all about Hard and Dirty Work.
Tessai makes Ururu and Jinta out of spare parts from Urahara's Gigai experiments to house a heavily damage Kitsune and Tanuki spirit pair from a shrine that was destroyed. Ururu is the Tankuki, and the older one- Jinta seems a bit more 'organic' because Tessai learned a lot making his sister, and because as a Kitsune, he's a better actor.
***
Soul Society is in major trouble though.
with the sudden influx of souls- first from the bombing, but then from the radiation sickness and the famine that followed, the living and spirit worlds are in danger of becoming unbalanced.
It's a Major Crisis!
Fortunately for them, people with sociopathy tend to operate really well during Crises, and I realized the reason Mayuri hasn't been fired or killed by the time Ichigo shows up is that when shit hits the fan, Mayuri's lack of emotional response to the suffering of others means he can buckle down and fucking DELIVER.
Expansions to the pocket dimension that the queue of incoming souls is housed in? He didn't sleep for two weeks to get it done on time, but there was more than enough room when the bomb dropped and for the few months after as casualties continued.
Emergency rations for all these incoming factory workers that know nothing about farming? Behold, Nutritionally complete meals that you can eat right out of the box! And smaller, friendlier ones for the kiddies!
Hell, the 12th division even makes instructional propaganda videos about how safe and tasty these new foods are, featuring The Grand Clown Himself, and distribution centers featuring his likeness, so Mayuri enjoys a peculiar popularity in the Rukongai, not unlike an off-brand and sometimes educational Krusty The Clown.
Just ah. Stop asking questions about the ingredients list.
***
"I'm not fucking killing civillians." Says Kenpachi when Yamamoto begins to bring up the historical method that the Shinigami have used to balance out sudden influxes of souls from the living world.
"Oh?" Yamamoto glares at him. "You have a better idea?"
"What's them big fuckers that come outta tears sometimes? Hundred feet tall, black, bird faces?" He asks, waving as he tries to remember the names.
"...Menos Grande?" asks Ukitake, who has gotten remarkably good at interpreting for the man next to him at meetings.
"Yeah!" Zaraki grins, patting his six-foot-tall colleague on the head like a small child. "You said they're like... combination creatures of a thousand souls each right?"
"Zaraki is correct." Pipes up Tousen, who is also extremely eager to not murder civilians and even more eager to absolutely fuck up the army of Menos Aizen has been gathering in Hueco Mundo. "-It wouldn't be *easy* but dispatching approximately Five hundred Menos in the next week seems much more doable and much, much more morally sound than killing five hundred thousand civillians. Sir."
Kaname can feel the curse nails on his back starting to bleed from Aizen's glare but he presses on.
"-There appears to be a significant population of them gathered on the far eastern edge of Hueco Mundo. It would probably take most of the 11th Division's forces but-"
"IKKAKU!" Zaraki is already bellowing out the door to his lieutenant. "TELL EVERYONE TO PACK AN EXTRA PAIR OF PANTIES, WE'RE GOING ON A HOLLOW HUNT!"
There is a distant but enthusiastic whoop form Ikkaku in reply.
"An excursion into Hueco Mundo is exceptionally dangerous." Unohana notes, voice placid as he returns to the table.
"-and? I don't do this job because it's safe 'n' easy." Zaraki shrugs.
Her neutral expression softens just a bit into a small, affectionate and perhaps ever-so-slightly lascivious smile. "May I suggest that a detachment of the 4th Division accompany the 11th? It won't make the work easier, but it will mitigate some of the risk."
Yamamoto groans, aware that the decision has been made for him.
"Fine." He grunts. "Take a detachment of the Ninth too, you can use that newfangled radiodar whatsit to keep me updated."
"Pardon?" Mumbles Kaname, slightly woozy from blood loss.
His circulatory situation is not helped when an illusion-blind-to-the-blood Zaraki grabs him about the middle and starts carrying him off under his arm in exactly the direction the 9th and 11th are not like a particularly bewildered purse Chihuahua.
***
Aizen... almost strays from his path.
The Hogyoku is slow and tiresome, his first plan to barrage Karakura with Menos to create the Oken is being trashed and actually being forced to work his job of Rukongai Management is- Well, it's reminding him just why he started this quest to Dethrone God.
What loving creator would make an afterlife of squalor, where the 'lucky' are cursed to outlive everyone they know and love? Not one worth worshiping, surely.
But actually being out here, setting up emergency food distribution, implementing the latest in civil engineering from the newly arrived and seeing it immediately improve the quality of life, uniting families and... actually helping people? it's making him question his path.
Perhaps-
Perhaps God is not some uncaring regent on a distant throne.
Perhaps God is something that lives in all souls, a kindness and goodwill towards one's fellow man, and to spread the will of a loving creator, one must Act to Enact God's Will...
Gin Panics.
He has not spent the last 300-odd years dangling the Hogyoku in front of Aizen, stuffing him full of spiritual energy to feed to the machine that generates reality like he was fattening up a goose for Pate, only to have him give up his quest for divinity NOW.
He's gonna have to do something drastic.
He's gonna have to convince Aizen he was right all along, and that he needs to keep using the Hogyoku.
He's going to need to use Aizen's own Illusions against him, and convince Aizen that the souls of the citizens of the rukongai aren't worth playing a Benevolent God for. That the whole thing needs to come out and be replaced.
Sure, it's a dick move
but those are his specialty.
***
It's the night before the 11th and the two detachments are supposed to leave for Hueco Mundo, and Yamamoto's been doing some thinking.
He is also in Zaraki's quarters at midnight sharp.
"Captain-General." Nods Unohana, pausing mid-activity to acknowledge him.
"Bruh." Zaraki grunts to indicate they were busy.
"I need to borrow Zaraki for an hour or so, and then you may continue." he says, and then steps back outside so the man can get untied and dressed.
"This better be good old man, I know you haven't been married for a few centuries but REALLY-" Zaraki grumbles, emerging and putting his sandals on.
"Don’t worry, it’ll take twenty minutes tops, all you have to do is stand behind me and don’t hide your rage." Yamamoto explains. "-We'’re going to go see the central 46."
Zaraki pauses mid-sandal, slowly looking up at him with an intrigued arch to his brow.
"Yes, it’s forbidden." Yamamoto says, not tearing his gaze away from the moon above them. "-But I've received reports that the Central 46 has acquired blueprints of the... Device. Used in the living world earlier this month and I'm nipping this at the damn bud."
Zaraki grins, and finishes putting his sandals on.
The Central 46 are alerted to the Presence of Yamamoto and Zaraki by the main gate to their district being kicked through the wall of the council chambers.
"Hello, Sages and Wise Councilors of the Soul Society!" The Old Man greets them as he steps through the hole he just made, and The Barbarian squeezing through after, sword casually over his shoulder. "Well isn't this a surprise, everyone here in a full meeting at One in the Morning on a Teusday!"
"Wh-What is the meaning of this?" one of the head councilmen sputters, mustache bristling. "Shinigami are forbidden form this place, I'll have you both execu-!"
"Shut up." Yamamoto glares, and sparks fly from the corner of his eye. The hem of his Haori is starting to smolder and singe as well as he approaches the table the councilors are crowded around the blueprints from the living world.
"Now, we are all good and honorable people here." Yamamoto says, casually waving a hand in what would normally be a placating gesture but now only made his sleeve flicker as Ryujin Jakka grew hungrier. "-But I've been around long enough to know how Power corrupts."
"And we've all been exposed to a new, horrific level of Power."
"Oh, of course, you would never! It's unthinkable to sink to such a level!"
"...but it's been a few weeks. The initial shock has faded, and you're starting to understand the full toll of the destruction." he explains, strolling up, the diamond insignia on his back spreading across his shoulders as the Haori singes. Behind him, Zaraki is following with an unpleasantly carnivorous stroll, yellow eye lazily moving from face to face, taking stock of all those present. "...and you are perhaps developing a new standard of devastation and suffering to wish upon your enemies."
There is some muttering, some protesting, and worse, some agreeing.
They are silenced by a sudden electric crackle of Energy from Zaraki.
"I’m just here to tell you all-" Yamamoto continues, unperturbed. Or perhaps so perturbed he's warped all the way around to a deep, ruthless peace.
"If I hear any ONE of you has taken steps to develop a weapon like this-" he points a finger at the blueprints, which singe and then burn, a low, slow flame that reduces them completely to ash.
"-I’m going to kill all of you."
"Actually," he explains, as the blueprints finish burning and the table catches as well, fire blooming and crackling, lighting him from beneath. "I’m going to kill all of you and your families. By which I mean, I’m figuring out who all your ancestors were going back Five generations, Kill them, and kill all their descendants."
The table burns, and the floor is threatening to catch, but nobody can move to ring the fire alarm or grab a bucket of water.
"-Because that’s the kind of indiscriminate destruction these things cause." he explains. "It's a damn shame to say this, but this is the first time we've been able to settle whole families in the same town- because five, six, even seven generations of families, from great-great grandmother to the newest infants were burnt together in an instant."
"So if you want to wield that kind of destruction, you best be prepared to deal with those kinds of consequences." he growls, and suddenly sweeps his hand over the fire, which snuffs out immediately.
Slowly he turns to go, and regards Zaraki behind him.
"Oh, and just in case any of you had thoughts of hastening my retirement in regards to this matter-" he speaks up, and points to Zaraki "-Near as I can tell, this asshole is immortal and indestructible, so if I happen to be dead, he'll do it for me, won't you?"
"Yes, sir." Zaraki Nods, eye fixed on the head councilor, committing his face to memory, blade and crackling eagerly.
"-and he's nowhere near as speedy and clean a killer as I am, so I suggest you don't test either of us." Yamamoto grins, and Ryujin Jakka can't help but flicker off his brow for emphasis.
"Goodnight, and go fuck yourselves." Yamamoto bows, and exits through the same hole he entered.
The walk back to the 11th is largely silent, but Yamamot can feel the pleased-yet-curious thrum of reiatsu from Zaraki.
"Question, boss-" he suddenly speaks as they approach the 11th.
"You're not supposed to question orders, Zaraki." He sighs.
He'll make a proper shinigami out of him.
Eventually.
"...Request for clarification, Boss-" Zaraki tries again, and Yamamoto nods. "-Why me?"
Yamamoto arches an overgrown brow at him.
"Not complainin'-" Zaraki explains, pointedly looking up at the moon and scratching his neck in deferment. "-But Byakuya's got more sway with them and Gin's definitely better at terrifying first impressions."
"Hm." Yamamoto nods. "It's in the follow-up, not the impression, you see."
"I do not." Zaraki says.
For all his faults and frustrations, Zaraki sure keeps Yamamoto on his toes about not being lazy and actually explaining himself.
"-I am very serious about you killing them and their descendants if they ever think about making one of those devices." he sighs and Zaraki nods, waving a hand for him to continue. "-So I picked the Shinigami most invested in a peaceful future to make sure my orders would be carried out."
Zaraki still looks confused.
"You're my only captain with children, Zaraki." Yamamoto explains. "I know you only give half a rat's ass about the court guard, but I've seen what you'll do for Yachiru."
Zaraki nods understanding now, and a few more paces of silence pass between them.
"...Thank you, Sir." Zaraki mutters, bowing his head and using the honorific with genuine intent for the first time since Yamamoto had known him. "-For understanding."
"Thank you, Captain Zaraki." Yamamoto nodded slightly, stopping before the gate to the 11th. "-For understanding as well."
"-Now get back to Captain Unohana before she schedules some sort of blood test of a thousand needles for me!" Yamamoto grunted, prodding at Zaraki with his cane, and the man didn't need to be told twice.
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𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟯 𝗶𝗻 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝗿𝘁
new year is approaching and what's better than a 2023 pac reading? - remember that this reading is timeless and is meant for you when you find it . choose pile 1 to 3 which from left to right above - choose the picture by grounding yourself and thinking of the topic - you can choose more than one piles of you'd like - this is a general reading and may or may not resonate - the forms of divination used in this reading are black seed tarot deck cards, intuition, shufflemancy and my personal charms. please ignore the typo errors made if any, while channeling.
your likes and reblogs will be appreciated<3 for more pacs, astrology posts and paid readings; you can visit my masterlist.
have a good day and choose your pile carefully 🤍
© planetsxmore rights reserved 2022
𝓹𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝓸𝓷𝓮
𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟯'𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂:
cards: the high priestess,3 of Pentacles
2023 will be all about self growth,self clarification and self confidence. this year will help you grow out of your insecurites and self doubts. you'll realize that pleasing the world completely is impossible for anyone to do so - hence you'll grow out of the societal expectations. i saw an image of a butterfly as i channeled this message - you'll understand the reason of your life path or be close to understanding it in 2023. spiritual or religious impact may be present this year. you'll also be able to differentiate between your true well wishers and your fake relationships. you'll embark on a beautiful journey in 2023. pursuing hobbies and interests that make you happy,make you contented. a year of a personal glow up, especially spiritually/emotionally. physical glow up may be there for a few of you as well.
𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟯:
card: 2 of swords
ah,well you'll be confused - if you're confused right now about someone or something than be prepared that this may continue next year. if not,then you may develop crushes or meet people that may make you confused about your choices. a sense of confusion - it's like more than one choices would be approaching you or you may like more than 1 person this year - whom you'll choose will depend upon differently for all since this is a general reading. i also feel as though some of y'all may be puzzled as to what love actually means for you,as i said earlier - it's a a year of self clarification - this year is extremely important as by the end of it, you'll know what "exactly" you need or want. as for love, i see a similar vibe here. for some of y'all,you could meet 2 soulmates or a twin flame and a soulmate - that will confuse you as to which one you feel for truly - if you're ever in a situation like this,go for the soulmate (just a personal thought, twin flames are toxic slightly) but ofc at the end it's up to you - so in short,i do see love in the picture of 2023 but it's more so in the form of priorities and confusions - as in more than one choices/crushes.
𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸/𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗱𝗶𝗲𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟯:
card: ace of pentacles
this portion is for the ones that work or study or intend to. a good card to represent the theme -if some of y'all are trying to seek admission or job offers,then this is a huge indication that 2023 will be the year for y'all. you'll be getting more than just one offers (kind of matching the love life vibe somewhat 👀) but unlike the love life,there's no confusion here. you'll be clear about which one you'll want to pursue and you'll go for it. it'll be a huge change for y'all but you'll be happy with it for sure! for those who are already working,i sense a promotion is coming up next year or just something significantly positive - this will boost your professional life. those who are studying, you're either obviously getting promoted into the next class next year - and this class will probably prove to be better than the last. you'll perform better, maybe even get better opportunities for co curricular or have better mentors or advices that you will definitely seek.
𝗮𝗱𝗱𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗶𝗻𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻:
card: the world + intuition+ charms
travel could be in the picture. could be long term travel or short term travel, intuitively -for a specific group if y'all, i feel it could be both coming up for you in 2023. most of you it's for recreation while the rest is for work. through the charms,i see that you could have to encounter some people that you hated lately - idk exes or maybe even people that you disliked (not sure if your opinions about them would change or not,since this is a general reading and the situations will be different for all). there will be an ending of a toxic cycle in 2023 for you. i see new beginnings as well. you'll spend more quality time with your family and yourself as well more than your friends or co workers etc. a change in the way you approach the world and perspectives is in the picture as well.
𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗹𝗲𝗱 𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗽𝗵𝗿𝗮𝘀𝗲𝘀:
divination form: shufflemancy and intuition
lights,gazes, butterflies,3737, spirituality,pollen(?),444,aptitude 🦋
𝓹𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝓽𝔀𝓸
𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟯'𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂:
cards: 7 of cups,the sun
this year seems to be a very fast one for you, especially the second half of it for most of you. it seems to be full of opportunities that you may or may not avail - i hope most of y'all do, because this can be life changing. 2023 will help you achieve what you've desired the most,be it physically, emotionally or materialistic-ly. i see that most of y'all by the end of 2023 will be like "this was one of my luckiest year" - of course,as i said - if you "do" avail these opportunities. i see alot of offers coming your way this year. this year may also help you engage in recreation - you can become more social than you are today. exploration will be the main theme of 2023 for you. positive changes coming your way - this seems to be such a beautiful vibe because the sun is card is literally one of the most positive cards in the deck in my opinion. be ready for a rollercoaster year full of happiness. your subconscious manifestations are coming your way - please don't hesitate taking risks this year else you'll miss out on alot.
𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟯:
card: 6 of cups
y'all - i haven't done pile 3 or completed your pile but i literally love this pile already -- i just hope it resonates with y'all because it's beautiful! for the people that are already dating,you may be with the same partner in 2023 (unless future energies change) and i see you developing an even stronger bond with this person. you both will fall in love even more. - for some of you, marriage proposals are coming up as well in 2023. i see many people approaching you, crushing on you secretly - but be carefully, just got a specific energy here that you may attract a stalker or someone toxic so just be careful with that. don't trust anyone quickly. for singles,a beautiful relationship is in the picture of 2023. as i said earlier,a year of opportunities - so make sure you avail the good ones. if you'll deny them all,then don't expect a miracle to show up - ofc, you'll need to accept something for a blossoming. such a happening year for y'all - i see that you may be approached by people that you already had a crush on. 6 of cups is indicating "love is in the air" for your 2023 theme. if you're the kind of person who doesn't date or isn't interested in love,then ofc your personal choices are beyond tarot, but you will be approached romantically in 2023 many times,unless you change your energy drastically attracting a different future.
𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸/𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗱𝗶𝗲𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟯:
card: 3 of cups reversed,4 of swords reversed (extra card)
you'll be on your own this year in terms of work/studies. for those who're trying to seek a job or admission, you'll do it on your own. you'll research and work on it on your own - i pulled a card for this specific question as to will you get what you'll try to achieve and you got the 4 of swords reversed. you will definitely get it but with the work needed - a little tiring and you can face slight delays but you'll get what you'll have your eyes on at the end - and that's what matters at the end right? for those who are already in a job,you may take a leap of faith and change your work place - adjusting can be a little difficult but you'll get used to it at the end. you may not receive the help you wished your friends, colleagues or workers may have given you - but perhaps they are inexperienced in the matter itself - for those that are still studying,things will be okay. you may work for a change in your academics and they may work out at the end. your mentors or classmates may not be very helpful -- you'll achieve everything on your own in 2023 (which is a good thing in my opinion)
𝗮𝗱𝗱𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗶𝗻𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻:
card: 9 of cups + intuition+ charms
abundance will be approaching you this year. also through the charms,i just got a soda shaped charm and i feel with the 9 of cups - you'll be having alot of food in 2023 or changing something about your preferences with food (this could be for a specific group as well,it doesn't have to be for all) - some of y'all can gain weight easily in 2023, just be careful with that. i see mental relaxation in some way maybe a vacation of some kind or perhaps pursuing something you love - getting one of your wishes fulfilled in 2023 - meeting people who'll end up admiring you or your ways. you may also meet people who may "inspire" you in a way. i also just heard the word "counselling" for someone,it could be applicable in any way.
𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗹𝗲𝗱 𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗽𝗵𝗿𝗮𝘀𝗲𝘀:
divination form: shufflemancy and intuition
"i am enough",222,trust,crowds,burgers(?), run-around,puzzles, polaroid, pursue(?) 🎫
𝓹𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝓽𝓱𝓻𝓮𝓮
𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟯'𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂:
cards: 7 of pentacles, knight of swords
a busy 2023 is in your cards. this year will exhauste you but in a good way. it'll be faster than the rest - y'know the time when we're like "how'd this year end so quick?" - that's exactly what you'll be going through. something will keep you busy,but you'll be happy with it. i see that you'll be getting appreciation for your efforts - it's like you'll like working on a particular thing because you may be getting the acknowledgement to fuel you. this work could be anything for different people, maybe even a hobby or studies or your career - but it'll keep you on your toes this year. if you're waiting for something for a long time,this year would help you achieve it quicker than you expected it to be. i also see that you'll become more action oriented in 2023. on a negative note,you could be drained at tom- but tbh,this seems to be a good thing that you'll learn how to handle stress this year. you could mature this year alot. by the end of it, you'll be a more matured person by emotions or work.
𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟯:
card: 5 of pentacles,the temperance (extra card)
not bad not super good. love will be there but not the one to woo you off. general crushes and general approaches are there - if you are in a relationship,then it'll be okay - it doesn't seem to break for most of y'all but for some of you,be careful with the differences of opinions with each other. now don't get me wrong,it's not going to be a love-less year,it's just that i'm describing the entire theme with one card. 5 of pentacles is also not the best card to get - you will have your romantic moments, but as i said, you'll be very busy this year too so it's not going to be all about romance. i pulled another card for a little more clarification and it was the temperance that came out - a balance. even if you start dating someone new (which can be possible in 2023) - they will not be the center of your attention in 2023. sure you'll have your romantic moments and dates, but nothing's going to be extremely, extremely special. good thing is that i don't see anything too negative either. ofc - you can change the future that you're attracting at the moment with your energy changes so it isn't set in stone but for me,it's not necessarily a bad thing that romance won't be your "main" focus in 2023. it's a general overlook and so i'm not going in specific details otherwise i'm sure you'll have your specific romantic moments in 2023 too,it's just not very significant in 2023's theme.
𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸/𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗱𝗶𝗲𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟯:
card: queen of swords
Being "in charge" - no matter what circumstances it is,if you're wanting to know how things will go professionally - they'll go very well for most of the year, especially the end. 2023 will be a year where you'll become the "queen of swords" in your own way, regardless of what gender applies to you. You'll be the one who won't take sh*t from anyone especially in terms of your work. If you're trying to seek admission academically or a job somewhere,be assured that if your subconscious energy remains the same - you'll be attracting a very strong future in 2023. You'll be getting a job/admission somewhere,where you set your eyes on in 2023. An ideal place for you - and this place will likely be where you'll be more popular than you are today. Popular in your department,or class or group etc. (Let's hope it's for the good reasons lol 👀) - for those who are already in a job or institution,you'll become more confident and comfortable in that way in 2023. i see that you'll be achieving success in 2023 - progressing better than you were last year. I just heard the word "controlling" - idk how it could apply in any of your situations because it's general y'know. it could mean a new project or phase that you may be in charge of. as little as being a monitor to as big as being the head of the department - for some of you all, promotion is in the picture as well. likely a position where you can take decisions and it makes an impact on all. overall,a good enough year for your professional growth/class if you make your intentions clear from the start.
𝗮𝗱𝗱𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗶𝗻𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻:
card: 5 of cups reversed + intuition+ charms
there'll likely be a realization that things that you may have thought would be fruitful for you would not matter to you in 2023 or you'll learn to let go of it - overcoming some kind of addiction in some way or unhealthy attachment - with the help of the charms,i see that you'll likely encounter elderly people in 2023 - you'll have less time for yourself and i also see travelling for academics/work for group of you here. i hear the word "praises" too so some of y'all may be getting praised alot in 2023 in a way. (somewhat matches with the acknowledgement theme) - be careful because i feel that you may encounter someone with an envious energy,who may be jealous of you in some way,so just be careful and try to stay away from people that you know aren't your well wishes - your personal intuition will likely grow in 2023 as well so trust your gut feelings as well. you'll be mentally really active this year (not sure what this could really mean - but it just came through in the reading and i had to type it out)
𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗹𝗲𝗱 𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗽𝗵𝗿𝗮𝘀𝗲𝘀:
divination form: shufflemancy and intuition
challenges, success,black eyes(?),rock music,long drives, documents,111,night 🧿
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Protector of Teyvat (a troll hell-bent on reviving everyone just for fun) P—1
Isekai’d reader who is hell-bent on reviving everyone using your cheat code as the protector of Teyvat. With great power comes great benefits! Teyvat population stonks
Note: asmoday is the unknown god, reader also grants gnosis and visions, isekai, slight sagau, op reader
Summary: You are just a regular human being living your best life on Earth, collecting husbandos and waifus in Genshin Impact when all of a sudden you were isekai'd to Teyvat, but not as a traveler, a creator, or an NPC. You were a very close friend of both Celestia and the Unknown God, who is known as the Sustainer of Heavenly Principles. You too, hold a very important position of the highest order because unbeknownst to the general populace, you are the Protector of Teyvat from the outside forces. And so imagine the Archon's faces when their dead friend suddenly came back to life just so they can accompany you together with Aether and Paimon on a journey to spit on the Celestia's face
Timeline in Teyvat when you got transmigrated: Before any wars happened. Zhongli is probably sucking on a dragon pacifier or something if that even exists.
Warning: curse words, slight ooc, lore flying over the ocean and going for a swim, author removed the lore from the irminsul so act like you know nothing of it, i'm putting the lore in the cheese grater
Teyvat is at last protected from the hostile forces of the outside world; however, you cannot be certain that Teyvat is safe from the inside due to the fact that those petty Gods have a tendency for wreaking even more havoc. Who the hell told them to compete with each other by trying to kill one another just so they could get a position?
Ah, yes. There's no way out of this one except to blame Celestia! The people you consider to be your closest friends are actually the embodiment of headaches.
However, despite the fact that it is your job to prevent travelers from entering Teyvat so as not to upset the balance of fate, one of your other best friends has in fact literally trapped the twin travelers inside Teyvat!
Just what the hell is Asmoday thinking!
And now, one of the twins is dead set on eradicating your other best friend, who is a professional for wreaking havoc within the world that the three of you have taken an oath to defend.
You would have annihilated the world a long time ago if it weren't for the fact that you made a pledge to safeguard it so that you could continue to observe your characters.
It's unfortunate that you only get to see Venti once in his adorable little form before the two headaches call you to join them in observing the people like the creepy stalkers they are. It would have been better if you can see more of Venti in that little elemental spirit form of his.
But hey, at least you made it possible for Venti to grab a position as a form of repayment for the times you would drop an apple right above his head.
If only the gods knew that developing a close relationship with you would also result in them gaining a gnosis, it would make everything so much easier for them.
No war, no killing, but they would probably need to act cute right in front of you to get one.
Though, you’ll be going against the Celestia if you did that. But what are they going to do? Hit you with an Anemo vision?
“...you can't just go ahead and do that.” The Celestia grunted and slapped themselves in the face.
“But I just did.” A lazy smile crept across your face while your chin relaxed on the palms of your hands as you watched the newly formed seven rule over their respective nations.
If you hadn't been smiling in such a devious way, the two individuals would have complimented your beauty on the spot.
“Oh my god—” Celestia bemoaned.
“You’re a god…”
“So, to put it simply, the battle hasn't even begun yet, but somebody has already won a seat. You called him a little floatie, didn't you? What sparked your interest in them in the first place?” Asmoday or the Unknown God, spoke to you as she continued to look at you with a curious expression on her face and a raised brow.
“Haha— you should've seen how Vent— little floatie bit into an apple that was way bigger than him. Quite adorable if you’d ask me.”
“…you granted him a seat just because you found them cute?”
“Oh my god—” Celestia lamented once again, “So it wasn’t a fair fight for the seat?”
“Never was.”
“Oh my g—” You couldn't help but chuckle darkly as you stuffed an apple in her mouth in an effort to silence her.
You jotted down a long list of things that need to be done, and you intend to get to them after you've finished taking care of everything else.
Resurrecting the pitiful gods that perished as a result of the archon war; perhaps rebuilding Khaenri'ah as a means of spitting in Celestia's face; perhaps as an act of retaliation for giving you more work all the time; or perhaps guiding the traveler yourself.
The sooner they reach their final destination, the sooner they will leave this world.
Once they leave the world, you are going to take a break and drink one of Asmoday's best wines until you drop dead.
But there's no doubt that those two will irritate you to death faster than you can get drunk.
You devoted your entire life to protecting the world from those pesky travelers who never stopped making a nuisance of themselves within Teyvat.
Because there are so many of them, you can actually see Asmoday rolling her eyes and simply wrapping people in her cube-thingy before sending them off to some unknown location in the vast universe.
And standing before you right now is the traveler that Asmoday entrapped in this world.
You only blinked in amazement when Aether pulled a flying fairy out of the waters in a literal way.
“Ugh…” The winged fairy in flight coughed several times before rising back into the air and floating once more with a slight swaying motion, as if she were feeling dizzy. “Paimon was terrified that she was going to pass away...”
"Well, if you're feeling like you're going to die, why don't you come over here? I'll make you feel better."
While you were laying on your side on top of the flat stone, you spoke with a joyful tone in your voice.
Aether turned around and looked up at you as he saw a hint of a smile on your face while you were looking down at him. Even though you were only dressed in plain white clothing and had flowers the color of the sky adorning your hair, he couldn't help but be taken aback by your otherworldly beauty. He found himself blinking multiple times.
Paimon, who was still not acting like her normal self, floated towards you without consciously trying to do so.
"Quite an obedient one, I see." You laughed as you poked the flying fairy in the forehead, and something glowing within her. Paimon's eyes widened in an expression that suggested she was startled, and she began looking around in a frantic manner.
“Oh— oh, you saved Paimon!”
You gave a slow shake of your head while pointing at Aether, who was still standing there, and said, "It was he who saved you."
“Oh! Thank you very much, you are my savior!" Paimon flew towards Aether and smiled at him with a broad grin, to which Aether responded with a friendly one of his own.
Aether scratched the back of his neck and said, "It's nothing," giving the impression that he was embarrassed to have been caught by the mysterious woman who has the presence of a Goddess. "The only reason I was able to save you was because of sheer good fortune."
"Well then, why don't we all go around and say a few words about ourselves?" You spoke as you sat up from the stone and descended down to their level.
The two people looked at you with their mouths hanging open as they watched you walked in the air.
“Hey! You are also capable of floating!” Paimon exclaimed, her eyes glistening with happiness at the sheer joy she felt.
When Aether opened his mouth to speak, you quickly silenced him by placing your finger over his mouth and pressing down lightly.
"How about we start by introducing ourselves to one another, shall we?"
After both of them nodded, it was clear that they were ready to start introducing themselves.
“And just like that, the god took away my sister. Some kind of seal was cast upon me, and I lost my power. So, while we used to travel from world to world, we are now trapped here.”
In response, you hummed to express yourself. Naturally, you were already aware of this information; however, this is not only due to the fact that you are now the Protector of Teyvat and are familiar with the God who trapped the twins in this world; rather, this is also due to the fact that you were once a player in the game.
“So… you are not familiar with this world?”
Aether heaved a sigh and gave the disappointing response, “Unfortunately, no.”
"As a gesture of gratitude, Paimon promises to do everything in her power to be an excellent guide!"
“How about you, Y/N? Are you like Aether too?” Paimon cocked her head to the side and scanned your entire body from head to toe while keeping a close eye on you.
You let out a chuckle as she looked at you with an inquisitive expression while speaking in a very assured manner. “I know Teyvat very well that I can practically see it with my eyes closed.”
“Oh! Then you can rely on us to steer you in the right direction, Aether! We will definitely help find your sister!”
Aether's grin was sincere, and it seemed to him that a weight had been lifted off of his chest. "Thank you."
You replied, "It's not a problem at all," while twirling a strand of your hair and acting as if you were unaware of Aether's gaze on you.
"Then, why don't we begin by trying to get in touch with the seven?" You offered an idea.
Paimon started explaining about the archons and the nations that they would have to travel through before Aether even had a chance to ask what the seven is.
As Paimon went into extensive detail describing the location where the three of you will begin your journey, you softly hummed a lullaby, your voice gently caressing the ears of your two traveling companions like wind chimes.
"Mondstadt, hm? Stunning decision, if I do say so myself. Do you know that the archon is just around the next corner?" You made them both laugh by making a joke. Ha, if only they know you weren't kidding around.
"Where?" Paimon sputtered in shock. “Are you familiar with the archons? Do you know the archons?"
"Haha, well, of course it goes without saying that I do. After all, I did grant him that position." You smiled at them in a careless manner, and in return, they flashed a blank expression in your direction.
You never had any intention of concealing your true identity, and now it is up to them to decide whether or not they will believe you. A person who is able to grant a Gnosis is considered to be on par with the Celestia, or possibly even on a higher level than them. This fact alone makes it seem impossible that you are saying the truth.
Therefore, they may believe that it is impossible for someone like you to be wandering the lands of Teyvat instead of keeping an eye on them from a higher vantage point.
“Uhh… Paimon is unsure of whether Y/N is teasing us or whether they are actually being serious…”
Aether gave it some thought before finally agreeing with the statement.
"Enough with the small talk, let's make our way over to the statue."
The two remained silent as you led the way, and your lullabies are the only sound that they are able to hear presently. It was a very relaxing stroll to get to the statue, and the two of them couldn't have been more happier to be in your calming presence the whole way there.
You have finally arrived at your destination after what seemed like an endless amount of time spent walking there.
You made the decision to step back, but not too far away from them as you watched the blond hair traveler put his hand on the statue, and the power of anemo swirled around before touching him.
“Ooh! Did you just feel the elements of the world?”
“Seems like all you had to do was just touch the statue and you got the power of Anemo!”
“Quite handy, don’t you think? At least you won’t have to rely on visions.” You said as you sat down on the grass.
“Y/N is correct! As much as they may want it, people in this world can never get a hold of powers as easily as you...” Paimon explained as she crosses her arms.
Aether frowned slightly. “I think I know why, it's because...”
“Ah-ha, it's because you're not from this world to begin with.” Paimon replied nodding in agreement.
“Well, if you’re done, it’s time to go to the city.” You said before yawning boredly as you heard Paimon explaining things to Aether again. Spoken like a true floating compass indeed!
Aether paid close attention, making sure he understood all of the new information that he had just been given.
During the length of time that Paimon spent slowly explaining the details, you did not speak, and you did not interrupt her. You were only going along for the ride because you thought it would be fun, Paimon can be the guide for all you care.
The three of you had just made the decision to leave once more in order to travel to the city of Mondstadt when all of a sudden, a large dragon appeared in the skies above and began flying in the direction of the center of the forest.
“There’s something huge in the sky!" Paimon let out an exclamation as Aether, who was protecting his eyes from the brisk wind by covering them with his arm, hummed in response.
"I'll take a look at it. Please, bring Aether to Mondstadt first, Paimon," You only gave them a quick look, but just seeing the concentration on your face was enough for them to agree and nod their heads.
You kept an eye on their rear ends as they moved further and further away from you, and it wasn't until you were no longer able to see them that you started to make your way towards the center of the forest, stopping to pick an apple from a tree along the way.
You approached the archon and the dragon stealthily, being careful not to make any noise with your steps and moving as quietly as possible. You used your flying abilities to get to the branch of the tree where Aether had been hiding during the cutscene, and then you sat there and watched the anemo archon take his sweet time trying to communicate with Dvalin.
"He's poisoned, it's pointless," You spoke but there were no sounds that came out of your mouth. The only thing that carried your message to the ears of the anemo archon was a light breeze.
Venti jerked his head in response to the recognizable voice that he heard in his head, which resulted in Dvalin being startled. The dragon let out a deafening roar, and the wind whipped around erratically in the areas surrounding it.
“Who’s there!?” While Dvalin was behaving erratically, Venti looked around. He would not continue to stay if he hadn't just heard a voice that sounded familiar just now; otherwise, he would have vanished at that very moment.
Dvalin let out one final roar before spreading his wings and making the decision to flee the area, leaving you and Venti behind in complete silence.
You heaved a sigh as you took another bite out of the apple that you had earlier plucked from the tree. Venti turned his head in the direction of the sound of the crunch to look in your position, and all you did in response to his keen observation was raise an eyebrow.
"Well, how are you doing today, Barbatos?" You said while giving him a friendly smile as you threw the apple with the bite taken out of it, which he caught with the right hand.
A puzzled expression appeared on Venti's face as he pondered how you are familiar with his name. You do not give the impression of being an enemy in any way, but you were not also an archon. Therefore, how are you able to know his name?
“Hum…” You hummed while resting your cheeks in your palm and tapping the side of your face lightly with your fingers, "When I first saw you, you were just a little elemental spirit. Quite adorable, if I may say so."
You found it very funny when Venti's face started to flush and he turned his head to the side to hide it; cute, you say?
“Do we know each other, my lady?”
“We haven’t really met formally but…” You stood up on the branch, smiling down at him with your bright expression. “Perhaps the wind will tell you of my identity, or is that even a thing? Haha!”
"I'll bring more apples next time, and maybe your bard friend and the other archons to accompany us!"
Venti gaped openly, "Bard friend? But he's..."
Your lively laughter was the last thing he had heard before you had vanished from your place, and now all that is left in his hand is an apple that has been munched on.
Venti stared at it for a moment before bringing the fruit up to his lips and biting it in the same spot on the apple that you had previously bit.
As Venti held the apple gently in his hands and licked his lips, he was aware that butterflies were fluttering around in the pit of his stomach.
He recalled how, back in those days, apples would all of a sudden appear in the sky and fall on top of his head. Due to the fact that he is only a small elemental spirit, he would fall to the ground along with the apple.
The fact that somebody is spending their time playing with him is another source of happiness for him, despite the fact that there were times when he would tumble right into the water.
He can't help but show a grin that tugs at his lips. It's possible that the two of you have been connected for an even longer period of time than the first friend he's made. Perhaps there was someone else there with him after all.
‘Sweet’ was the only word that came out of his mouth as he chewed slowly.
If you had stayed and watched the act, you would have been so horrified by it that you would have wanted to cringe. Hygiene is important!
Meanwhile on the other side, Amber screamed in surprise when you suddenly appeared in the sky and revived all of the hilichurls that they had just bombed. The most shocking of all is that the hilichurls suddenly turned into humans.
Somehow, you can feel that Lumine will chase you down soon.
honestly, because hoyo has a knack for killing npcs, I just want to go mad-rage and revive them like a madman. i kinda want to slap a fried egg on signora's ashes hehe. i also want makoto to come back to life and adopt my precious scara umu
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Writing Fight Scenes: The VIOLENT Method
okay, so because people have a hard time writing effective fight scenes, I'm going to walk everyone through the method that I use for everything from massive sci fi battles, to quick three-v-eight sword brawls to bar fights.
The VIOLENT Method. (Because fun mnemonics)
Visceral: Make sure your audience feels it by keeping it grounded in injuries and pain. People get fuckin' hurt in fights, and no fight where people do not is going to feel real. Tying into this, people don't fight fair, and people don't fight pretty. Even people who are trained fighters will make mistakes in their technique in a real fight because adrenaline makes you worse, not better, even as it makes you faster/stronger. Also, in real fights people stomp on downed opponents, take shots at turned backs, people bleed, scream, etc., Also, really critically, people are exhausted after fights. Your characters should be wrung by the time it's over, even if it only lasted for a few minutes.
Immediate: Keep sentences short and punchy. No one is analyzing every step of the fight tactically while it's happening. If characters are thinking "Ah yes I will make him overextend and then pull his wrist in and throw him before stomping his head…" I know that the author of the scene has never been in an actual fight. Keep sentences short and punchy. "Draw in, grab, and throw."
Obnoxious: Tying into the above, fights can be disorienting. Don't overdo this, you need your reader to have an idea of what's going on, but don't underdo it either - things should be a bit chaotic. If it feels like the characters know everything that's going on around them, you're doing it wrong. Read what the following sections say about rhythm, but bear this in mind: once you get a rhythm going and keep it flowing for several paragraphs: break it with a short, hard paragraph and shift it in a way deliberately disorienting to the reader on purpose to drive in that things are unpredictable. In a fight, there's a lot of noise, there's a lot of confusion, and that should reflect enough in the narration to bring a sense of it to the reader - but again, don't overdo it to the point where the reader can't tell what's going on.
Liquid: Fights flow. There's a definitive rhythm and momentum to a fight. While the characters won't necessarily have a great idea of everything happening, they WILL have a sense of the momentum around them and the way the fight is making them move. Momentum and movement are going to be the key to writing an impactful fight scene and give the reader a sense of excitement, or, if you want to give a sense of a dragging, exhausting affair of attrition, do the opposite: grind the momentum to almost nil while two massive groups start sniping and grinding at each other with almost no movement.
Environment: Where's the fight happening? How is everyone moving? Describe the surrounding environment. This is the space a fight is happening in, whether a big open field, a forest grove, a small tight room where you can use the walls for leverage, a park where you can use benches for jumping points or to smash people's heads against, etc., matters in a fight, as does how everyone is using it. Heat, cold, visibility, all of these factor into a fight as well.
Narrator: Who is your narrator in the fight? A trained soldier? A trained fighter? Just some untrained schlub who has no idea what they're doing? These people have a different idea of how fighting works, and that matters. What a soldier notices, what a correspondent notices, what a martial artist notices, etc, are all differences. Keep an eye on how you present this.
Tactics: What does everyone want out of the fight? Is one side fighting to kill the other? Just to knock out? To capture? To take a location? Just to drive each other off? What are the rules of engagement? How trained are the combatants? What kind of discipline is everyone under, if any? Weapons? These all matter when you're asking questions, and you should research what effects all of these will have, but short version: fighting to kill is easier than fighting to capture, and its very rare, despite what the movies say, that any force will fight to the last man rather than retreat.
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An Exhaustive Explanation For Why Qin Su Took Her Life Of Her Own Volition
(Or: For God's Sake, Please Just Let Her Have This One Thing)
Okay, so let's leave aside the fact that Wei Wuxian is an unreliable narrator. At the point in the novel at which he insists that Jin Guangyao must have forced Qin Su to kill herself somehow, Wei Wuxian has also insisted that Lan Wangji would totally hate it if he knew they'd made out while drunk. Let's also leave aside that Wei Wuxian himself will reassess his opinion of Qin Su's death later on, and IIRC says nothing about it either way in the drama, because the people who insist that JGY Definitely Killed Made Her Do That sure do. A narrator being unreliable doesn't mean we can't trust anything they tell us, after all; it just means we need to compare their views to outside evidence, the way you would with a primary source document.
AND WHEN YOU DO THAT
IT STILL MAKES ZERO SENSE
Picture all this from Jin Guangyao's standpoint. Let's assume for funsies that you don't care about your wife who is also your half-sister, and have no compunctions about killing her to keep the incest secret. Wouldn't you just... do that? Wouldn't you kill her the second that little paperman flies away and you hear the alarm?
"He obviously couldn't do that! The paperman saw her alive so it'd be weird if she suddenly was gone!" Yeah, and everyone at the cultivation conference saw her alive when they came into the treasure-and-torture room, and it would be even weirder if she suddenly stabbed herself to death in front of them.
"Ah, but he needed to know who sent her the letter! He can't afford to kill her!" Wow, hey, that's right! You, Evil Jin Guangyao, have just spent the preceding scene wheedling and then threatening Qin Su so she'll tell you who send the letter, and she stood firm the whole time! So forcing her to kill herself in front of everyone when she still hasn't told you that important piece of information would be PRETTY DUMB, wouldn't it? (Almost as dumb as giving her the opportunity to interact with all the people you're trying to keep the secret from, but hey, maybe it took you longer to hide da-ge's head than anticipated.)
"Maybe he'd given up on getting her to tell him anything so her killing herself was to divert suspicion away from him!" Okay, first of all, how is "your wife (whom nobody but you has seen recently) kills herself with no warning" going to make things look LESS suspicious? Second of all, things were going JUST FINE. You hid da-ge's head. People were buying your "this cursed cabinet is where I keep my former boss's soul-stealing knife" story. You haven't even subtly brought up Suibian to change the subject. The narrative misogyny means that nobody has directly talked to Qin Su and "of course my wife also hangs out in our house, lol" is flying just fine as an explanation. You had almost put out this fire! Why would you throw gasoline on it by making Qin Su kill herself?
Honestly, the smartest thing for you to do in this situation would be to knock your wife unconscious and move her to her sleeping chambers or a couch or something in the main part of the palace. That gets her out of sight and renders her unable to talk in a way that won't raise suspicions, and gives you the option of going "omg guyyys my wife is sleeping :( this totally unwarranted search of our home is gonna wake her up :(" to make people leave!
But, okay. Let's shift our perspectives here. Jin Guangyao has a history of making deranged choices when he's in Panic Mode. Maybe his brain short-circuited and, somehow, he decided that MAKE QIN SU KILL HERSELF IN PUBLIC was the best course of action. Wei Wuxian himself tells us that she wasn't under the influence of talismans or anything, so somehow Jin Guangyao convinced her to do this with his words. Never mind that we just saw Jin Guangyao deploy an ungodly combination of feigned ignorance, gaslighting, actual sincerity, veiled threats, and manipulation with zero impact. Somehow, he used his words successfully.
What could he possibly say?
Picture all this, now, from Qin Su's standpoint. Your entire world has been shattered. Your husband who is also your half-brother has been lying to you for your entire marriage, has done nothing to reassure you that he didn't murder your son, and has sealed your meridians to prevent you from fleeing. He then brought you into a secret room in your home that you didn't know existed and which, you discover, houses his sworn brother's severed head. All you know is that you cannot tell Jin Guangyao who gave you the letter because you're certain that he will have her killed. Shit's real fucked and you have nobody to help you.
Now every sect leader in the jianghu--including your husband's remaining sworn brother, your young nephew, and your nephew's maternal uncle--has shown up to search your husband's home. His top priority in this moment is quashing their suspicions so they leave him alone enough to regroup.
One of three things must be true for you.
1.) Your top priority is survival. You don't want to die. If you care about your reputation, you know that you're as screwed as he is if word of this gets out, and unfortunately the only way to survive is to play along with your husband's weird shit, at least for now. In that case, the best way to assure him that you're on his team is to help him assure the other sect leaders that Everything Is Normal And Fine. If you don't want to die, then you're not going to be susceptible to any insistence that you kill yourself.
2.) You're so furious that you don't care what happens to you or your reputation as long as you take Jin Guangyao down with you. In that case, you'd tell him whatever he wanted to hear and then IMMEDIATELY scream to the other sect leaders where Nie Mingjue's head is currently located, or you'd drop the incest bomb yourself hoping that the paperman is somewhere in that room and can back you up, or you'd grab that dagger and stab your husband, or some combination of all three! You're not going to quietly kill yourself at his request, because you've suffered enough for his bullshit!
"Well, maybe he didn't threaten her. She's going to be worried about Bicao and her father. Maybe he threatened one of them!" Yeah, maybe, but that's a threat to get someone to cooperate. You can't make sure they're still alive if you're dead! And if you're convinced that this guy has lied to you constantly for the past 10+ years, you're not going to believe him when he says"kill yourself and I'll be niceys to them." There is nothing at all that he could say to make her harm herself if she hadn’t been so inclined.
And that leaves
3.) You're in such despair that you actively want to die. You can never trust your husband again. You can never trust anyone again, honestly, because he wasn't the only person you loved who kept this secret from you. You don't trust that the other sect leaders will do anything to help you, just as your mother didn't trust that anyone would do anything to help her all those years ago. (When they barge into the palace and walk straight past you as though you were a piece of furniture, your distrust is confirmed.) Maybe, despite everything, you still love your husband too much to kill him. Maybe you fear that, without evidence, he will be seen as an innocent victim and you will be seen as his mad, murderous wife. Maybe you don't care what happens to anyone else, but you know that you don't want to deal with this anymore, and you are the only one you trust to help yourself escape it.
The tragedy of Qin Su is that she is never permitted to make a fully informed decision about her life. At least let her final action be something she knowingly chooses.
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“Scar!” Cub rushes into the room. Scar gasps loudly and falls backwards off of the balcony, dying on impact. “Oh. My bad, dude.”
“It’s fine, it’s fine,” Scar says, getting up from a nearby bed. “It’s not the first time that’s happened today.”
“Yeah. Anyways, did you vote for me?” Cub asks.
“Vote for you- oh! For the tumblr sexy-ma-doodle thing!” Scar says, gathering up his stuff. “Not yet! I’ll get on that right now.”
“It’s really close right now,” Cub says. “I think I can pull ahead, but it won’t be easy.”
“I don’t know what the masses are thinking!” Scar complains. “I mean, I know I’m sexy, but can’t they see your appeal? Don’t they know the power of the Convex?”
“You should make a calendar with both of us on it,” Cub suggests.
“Shirtless?” Scar checks.
“Shirtless,” Cub confirms.
“Yeah, okay,” Scar grins. “Hot Guy… Cute Guy… you can be Sexy Guy, I guess.”
“Sexy Man,” Cub corrects. “Tumblr Sexyman.”
“That doesn’t roll off the tongue at all!” Scar complained.
“It’s what I’m going for,” Cub smirks. “How quickly do you think you can get that calendar printed.”
Scar pulls off his shirt and out a camera. “You had me at ‘you should make a calendar with both of us on it.’”
- - -
“ETHO!” Bdubs shouts, landing face-first into the luscious, green, beautiful jungle grass. “WE’RE IN A TUMBLRMAN SEXY- AH- A TUMBLR SEXYMAN COMPETETION!!!”
“Oh snappers,” Etho murmurs, closing his shulker box and turning to look at Bdubs. “Wait, what-?”
“I voted for you, of course,” Bdubs says, holding up his phone to show Etho the bracket. “You’re winning by a landslide.”
“A tumblr sexyman competition?” Etho repeats, eyes darting between Bdubs and the bracket. “Like- a tumblr competition?”
“Yeah,” Bdubs grinned. “They love us.”
“That’s the place- is that where the- you made a tumblr account?” Etho asks, sitting on the shulker.
“Well, of course!” Bdubs brags. “I had to vote for us! Cleo, too, she’s doing good. She’s the one who told me about this in the first place, actually.”
“Oh,” Etho says. “Oh.”
“You’re winning,” Bdubs says again. “I voted for you.”
“I’m not making a tumblr account,” Etho folds his arms.
“Aw- come on, man! I voted for you, it’s only fair that you vote for me!” Bdubs whines.
“Nope,” Etho repeats. “Not on your life, Bdouble0.”
“Fine,” Bdubs says, pulling his phone out again. “I’m gonna rally the troops, though. I’m gonna make sure you win.”
“Wait, no, don’t-” Etho begged, but it was too late. Bdubs was flying off to who-knows-where to convince the masses to vote for Etho.
- - -
“Tango,” Zedaph says, frowning at his phone. “Are you-”
“Yeah,” Tango smirks. “I’m sweeping.”
“Oh, come on!” Zedaph whined. “Impulse-”
“I’m beating Fwip,” Impulse says.
“Jeez!” Zedaph throws his hands in the air. “Is it not enough to wear a catmaid outfit? Is it not enough to put catmaid pillows in my merch shop? It’s not my fault none of my fans made me a How Bad Can I Be animatic.”
“What’re you even upset about?” Tango teases. “Aren’t you crushing Schlatt?”
“I was,” Zedaph pouts. “The people rallied against me. Did you know Schlatt wears a suit? I should have worn a suit. I should have…”
“Oh, look at this!” Impulse pulls up the poll on his own phone. “You’re not loosing that badly.”
“I’m not sweeping,” Zedaph complains. “I’m not even winning! This is disgraceful.”
“To be fair, Schlatt is a pretty typical sexyman,” Tango says. “I’m surprised he didn’t get more nominations.”
“Fwip’s sexy!” Zedaph points at Impulse accusingly. “He’s a vampire, and Impulse is still obliterating him!”
Impulse shrugs. “No one’s campaigning for him.”
“Why’d they have to campaign against me,” Zedaph wails. “I’m sexy! I’m hot! I deserve this!”
“...there, there,” Tango reaches over to pat him on the back. “This is more of a popularity contest than anything.”
“That's not better!” Zedaph groaned. “The hermit fans practically rule the polls, and I’m loosing to SCHLATT?”
- - -
“I can’t believe this!” Iskal complained. “I’m loosing to this- this upstart! This young ‘un! Why’s he favorite to win?”
“You’re not even a man,” Stress giggles. “I don’t think-”
“I’m a man sometimes! And besides, I was their first example for a good sexyman!” Iskall whines. “I can’t believe this! I can’t believe it!”
“Oh, quiet your trap,” Stress laughs. “You’re perfectly sexy.”
“I know!” Iskall says. “I just need the masses to realize it…”
“You could try campaigning?” Stress suggests. “Everyone who’s talked about it or posted about it has been pretty successful.”
“Naw,” Iskall sighs. “I wanna win fair and square. Campaigning’s cheating in my book.”
“Everyone’s doing it, love,” Stress points out.
“It’s the principle of the matter,” Iskall shakes her head. “I can’t believe this.”
- - -
“Joe,” Cleo says, looking down at her phone. “Do you think we’re going to meet each other in the bracket?”
“Well,” Joe peeks over their shoulder to look at the bracket. “I’d say there’s a good possibility of it.”
“I won’t be voting for you,” Cleo says immediately. “I mean, sorry, but. Well. You know how it is.”
“I do,” Joe agrees.
“I’m doing a violence already,” Cleo giggles. “I’m destroying Zloy.”
“Oh, really?” Joe asks. “By how much?”
“Ninety percent,” Cleo brags.
“Oh, darn, me too,” Joe sighs. “I was going to rub it in your face if mine was higher, and conveniently forget to mention mine if it was lower.”
“I wouldn’t have let you do that,” Cleo says fondly.
“Yeah, but I would have tried,” Joe smiles back.
“I’m gonna beat you into the ground,” Cleo smirks.
“I don’t know about that,” Joe hums. “I’ve got a good campaign going. There’s a lot of users saying that you’re ‘too traditionally sexy.’”
Cleo scoffs. “This is a glorified popularity contest. It has nothing to do with actual sexyman merit.”
“Well, maybe I’m more popular than you,” Joe sticks his tongue out at her. “I’ve been campaigning.”
“We’ll see,” Cleo says. “We’ll see.”
- - -
“Come on…” Grian mutteres, watching the percent of votes between Mumbo and Grumbot wiggle back and forth.
“Father,” Grumbot beeps. “Please let me make an account. I need to vote for Better Dad.”
“No,” Grian snaps. “You’re not 13 yet.”
“No one will know!” Grumbot protests. “We can lie!”
“It’s about the principle of the matter!” Grian scowls. “We can’t commit voter fraud. It won’t be a real victory then.”
“I would commit voter fraud for Mumbo,” Grumbot mutters.
“I know, Grumbot.”
“I would kill to let Mumbo win,” Grumbot says.
“I know, Grumbot.”
“I could kill Scar,” Grumbot muses. “Everyone says he’s favorite to win.”
“He’ll still win if he’s dead.” Grian points out. “There’s a few- not everyone on here is alive. Or even real. Schlatt died years ago and he’s putting up a good fight. Mumbo’s doing fine. He’s beating you.”
“Good,” Grumbot beeps. “I’ll kill anyone who votes for me.”
Grian pauses. “Now there’s an idea. We’d have to kill them before they voted, of course, but that one’s got some real merit to it…”
- - -
“Jimmy,” Scott sings. “They love me.”
Jimmy looks up at him, eyeliner smudged. “They pity me.”
“I’m gonna wiiin,” Scott brags.
“They called me a wet paper bag!” Jimmy cries. “I’m winning, but not because they think I’m sexy! They just- they just-”
“...” Scott raised an eyebrow.
“Okay, they think I’m a little sexy,” Jimmy admits. “But only because I’m pathetic. That doesn’t count!”
“Take what you can get, Jimmy,” Scott says. “It won’t last long.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Jimmy sighs and pulls out his phone. “I just- Scott, what’s this job you’ve done on the tags? It’s kind of cringe.”
“That’s one of my tactics,” Scott grins. “They love pathetic men on tumblr. I’m totally going to sweep you.”
- - -
“Oooh, Lizzie, I can’t wait to get curbstomped by you next round,” Joel says, lounging on a cat bed.
“I can’t wait to curbstomp you next round!” Lizzie crows. “Oooh, I’m a fish-cat-lady, and I’m so sexy!”
“No, that’s kind of my thing,” Joel sniffs. “...people are saying I’m trying too hard.”
“Well, you are,” Lizzie points out. “No one’s going to take you seriously if you go around announcing how sexy and tall and lore you are.”
“Oh, but it works,” Joel says. “I’m super tall now and everyone loves me.”
“I’m still going to sweep,” Lizzie smiles.
“Oh, yeah, absolutely,” Joel agrees.
- - -
“You know,” Connor says, sipping a bottle of vanilla. “The syndicate’s doing pretty good in the tumblr sexyman competition.”
“What are you talking about,” Techno replies, biting into a potato.
“Me and Niki might drop out this round,” Connor continues. “But you and Ranboo and Phil… you’ll keep going, I think.”
“What?” Niki wrinkles her nose. “What do you mean?”
“No, no, I get it,” Techno nods slowly. “I wouldn’t have known, I’m not on tumblr.”
“What’s tumblr?” Ranboo whispers to Phil.
“Mate, you have an account, you of all people should be in on this,” Phil whispers back. “You need to start campaigning, you’re barely beating Xornorth.”
“What,” Ranboo says.
- - -
“Aw sick I’m starting to beat Iskal in the tumblr sexyman bracket,” Quackity says, and doesn’t say anything else because he is annihilated by a nuclear bomb.
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Bit worried about Ashlyn Harris actually
Aside from all the drama that's been going on lately, I've got to confess that for the past few months (or years?) I've been wondering what the hell is up with this woman.
I was such a huge fan back when she was just this Satellite Beach goalkeeper with a humble head and the love for skate-boarding and surfing and you know, family & friends first and her work with To Write Love on Her Arms. And I get people change and that none of us ever really knew her, but I've seen I'm not the only one who can't believe what she's turned into. Like, can we recognise her any more? Or was the completely playing out to be an entirely different person ten years ago?
I think it started when she came out with Ali and suddenly she was like, this attention-seeking, uncomfortably loud (as in literally screaming) person with the weird, rather cringey fashion, only talking about gay things and nothing else, behaving like the complete soccer start that to be entirely fair she wasn't... Even on her wedding video I couldn't believe that Ashlyn was the same Ashlyn of 2011, 2012, 2013... It's not even that many years to change so much, let alone in your thirties. It's like there were no remnants of the surfer, the skate-boarder, the humble butch from a small town who valued the little things... Like she was adamant on transforming into this massively public, loud, "fashionable (?)" celebrity. Even when giving interviews she was expressing herself like she had no intellect any more, you know like male footballers speak, like it's all looks and no brain, no sign of the person who got a uni degree and who gave an amazing mental health talk with TWLOHA years back.
And then when they were celebrating the WC, I was thinking, since when is she this loud and arrogant? Since when is she so attention-seeking? When did she turn into this whole other person who makes such a huge effort to ignore her lack of National Team performances and pretend like she deserved her world cup as much as Ali or Pinoe? I get subs deserve the medal and all too, I mean, they made it so far and if they weren't there training with the rest, the rest wouldn't be as good. You're only as good as the worst of you, after all. But none of the others was bragging so loudly and calling themselves x2 champions so much without having played a minute of those games, were they? Even Alyssa Naeher doesn't have world cup champion in her profiles, nor does AD Franch, nor PINOE, but you know who does? Hope Solo. And you don't want to have THAT personality. I feel like when you're confident on your victories, you don't need to brag, everyone knows who you are, your work speaks for itself.
What worries me about AH (sit down here comes my Psychology Grad analysis) is that in the past few years she's been more and more behaving like someone with no self-esteem, who's desperately afraid of being forgotten and needing to shout left and right look at me! i'm a champion! I'm a soccer star! And then she stopped getting called up for the USWNT, got stuck in the Pride (and I love them but bunch of losers tbh), and all she had left was Ali. And then Ali's doing better than she is. And then Ashlyn gets these horrible injuries and that's story of her life (injuries effed her up from day 1 and seriously impacted her career) and she's forced into an abrupt retirement with no glory.
And then emerges this Ashlyn who only cares about rubbing elbows with celebs, who believes herself to be some fashion mogul (that's all she's got left) and who is deeply satisfied with how her life turned out to be and how she's ended up being nothing but a footnote in the history of American women's soccer, specially compared to her wife. We know they've had issues for a while, that has been hinted at before, and I can only imagine there must've been a growing resentment/bitterness towards Ali because she gets everything Ashlyn won't in terms of soccer. In fact it seems to me (and maybe it's just me), that she seems to be ferociously resentful to soccer in general, like, suddenly she wants nothing to do with it and wants to pretend like soccer is not a big deal. How many times as she stated quite firmly that she's now happiest she's ever been and acted almost as if soccer was actually holding her back? as if her soccer career is nothing compared with what she has now, when we know it isn't true, because she still feels the need to remind us she's a twice world cup champion all the time?
So from a psychology point of view I think she's very bitter, very hurt, very pissed off, very resentful, that she hasn't processed her forced retirement and her not so good soccer career in a healthy way, and so she has to pretend like she's super happy and better than she was before so as not to look like the failure she feels she is. She has to use social media all the time and brag about the celebrities she's meeting, the trips she's going in... She's got nothing else but to pretend she's still as successful as all her friends she has to constantly see in social media showing off with the accomplishments she wishes she had. It's the classic game of getting depressed comparing yourself to others so you take to social media to constantly pretend you're as good as them or better, we all do it. And she's gone, in my humble opinion, off the rails, she's unrecognaisable, and if she has really had an affair and hurt Ali this big, as rumours have it, then that only strengthens my opinion. Like, I wouldn't be surprised if she's abusing substances again, if she's in some spiral downhill as it looks like. And what's Ali going to do? She can't focus on looking after her, she's got work, she's got two small kids, at this age Ashlyn needs to see she needs help and seek it on her own, not expect Ali to mother her.
That's part of why I really don't like people going on and insulting her left and right, because we really don't know what's going on, but to me it seems like when someone's not well, when someone's spiralling, they start to really go off and the first people to get hurt are those closest to her. And we must remember she is a human being, even if she makes mistakes, even if she does bad things (IF she has), and she doesn't deserve billions of people judging her and making her life miserable. And none of us would like it in our consciences if she actually is struggling with her mental health and gets worse because of generalised mass bullying. She's still Sloane and Ocean's mother, and they probably love her very much, and Ali's probably struggling a lot, so we need to remember supporting one person does not have to mean stooping so low as to have to become horrible bullies. Let's stay human, y'all.
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for anyone who criticizes jyl for bringing soup to yiling instead of like, money—
we should first ask: could jyl actually have given wwx money? she must have something, you say. the jins are rich! she could even give him some of her betrothal gifts.
but realistically jyl probably didn't have much money at all! let's think this through. not only did she not marry jzx yet at the time of her yiling visit, but (based on many, many imperial palace tv shows lol) all her worth would be in betrothal gifts of jewelry, fine clothing, or other misc items, which is 1) heavy and difficult to transport without notice, but that doesn't actually matter bc it's ultimately 2) disrespectful to sell and worse to have the gifter find out when they come by for tea and you begin chatting about the event in two days and they say oh where's that one-of-a-kind jade bracelet I gave you wouldn't it match the also one-of-a-kind silk garment that lady jin gave you sooo well oh you will look so lovely in it won't you wear it.
or worse, have it recognized in some random pawn shop on the street by someone who has never really liked you and WILL get you in deep shit for it.
does jyl have any money from the jiang side? well, jc has been busy at work rebuilding lotus pier and the clan since before wwx's defection, and even if he's not borrowing a shitton of money from the jins (which he almost certainly is), he definitely has the opposite of surplus funds. he's also busy organizing and buying gifts for the wedding too, making him go more in the red because you know the jins aren't going to want cheap-ass things even if you don't have money.
let's say jyl did get a significant bride price (aka given money money)—not only does that go to her family (jc), but it is given during the ceremony (which, again, hasn't happened yet). and, realistically, jc probably will have to use it to offset the costs of the above.
beyond that, let's just take this scene from a storytelling perspective. sometimes it is simply about the emotional resonance. the vibes. let's say jyl did have some funds to give wwx. but imagine if jyl was like here a-xian take all this money 😐 ok sure useful for some period. but is that the gift that wwx would want during the first time he's gotten to see her in months, and likely the last time he will see her in a long, long time (possibly years)? would that be impactful for the story?
meanwhile, the soup she brings represents her love. we hear in the extra, from wwx's own words, the care she put into selecting the ingredients, making sure the lotus root is fresh and perfectly ripe. it also takes hours for her to even make iirc. wwx derives so much comfort from it—that's why it comes up again and again. it is one of his first memories of feeling safe in lotus pier, of home. it provides wwx some semblance of normalcy. he hasn't had any this entire time, and is likely something he aches for whenever he's homesick or sad or questioning his choices. it is simply, given the circumstances, incredibly thoughtful. (and how meaningful was it to see wn treat it with such respect? seeing that is literally the moment in the chapter when wwx realizes—ah. the wens are people I cherish as well.)
and regarding jyl coming in her wedding dress—it is not for herself. it is for wwx. we saw how devastated wwx was just to even hear that jyl was getting married because he had to hear it from someone who wasn't jc or jyl. and to immediately then realize he cannot go? even more heartbreaking. and jyl, who clearly knows wwx extremely well, would know, without having to ask, how upset wwx would be to miss such a huge occasion in their lives that was previously a given. this is what she can do to offset that, even just a little. because jyl came in her dress, wwx gets to experience a piece of her wedding even though he cannot physically be there. not to be a 2000s mastercard ad, but there really are some things that money can't buy.
idk there's also some fist-shaking at the class discrepancy in the scene. and I get it. it sucks! her dress is certainly lavish, and the wens are farming on a corpse mountain and have only just started making a bit of money. yes, it's fine to think that if you were in the character's shoes, maybe you would've found it to be in poor taste—but the story isn't about you. it is about these characters, and what this scene means to them. and I'm of the camp that if there is no indication that wwx is upset by any of this, and in fact moved by it, there really isn't reason for the reader to be righteously indignant about these things on a character's behalf. that's just not the focus or the point of the scene.
plus, jyl is sharp. she is likely more aware of the discrepancy than most people think. she has also been shown in the text to not just be another sheltered, spoiled noble (re jzx soup incident). but if what you want is guilt from jyl—I personally think that guilt is performative, and accomplishes nothing. her guilt would've only made wwx unhappy. instead, here is an action that is meaningful and brings joy to wwx. to share her joy with him is not selfishness, nor is it some lack of awareness of their situation. if in this moment, she shows off her dress, if she revels in her joy, her happiness, it is for wwx, and wwx is incredibly moved by it.
and let's face it—wwx, of all people, would want to see jyl in a wedding dress that cost more than rebuilding lotus pier from the ground up. he wouldn't want anything less.
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"Hours, Eddie that's torture! Let the poor girl have her release.."
Part one
MDNI!! 18+ only under the cut
Feedback is always appreciated and welcomed! I haven't proofread this so it's potentially trash idk🙃 I'm nervous people will hate this but ah well I liked writing it anyway🥰
Warnings: smut, c*ckwarming, fem!reader, bullying, mean Eddie, simpy Steve, multiple o's, c*mswap kiss, spitting- let me know if I missed any! GIFs not mine, credit to the talented creators!
"Hours, Eddie that's torture! Let the poor girl have her release.."
Eddie laughed at her squirming, and landed a quick but sharp spank to her ass. She whimpered into his neck and stilled her hips as best she could.
"You really think Steve Harrington of all people is gonna swoop in and save you here, princess?" Eddie ignored Steve's comments about how gross he thought fucking the girl he regularly bullied was. "Or are you being a little whore and trying to fuck him too, huh? You know you're mine, baby, no one else is ever gonna touch you like I do"
Steve turned to face them again, truely shocked by Eddie's brutal words and behaviour towards the shy little thing curled in his lap, trying so hard not to cum before he said to. Maybe he was the knight in shining armour she needed... It had been a while since he last got laid... And tonight was the third date he struck out on this week alone..
"Eds, you know... If you're too busy to give her what she needs, I can take her off your hands?? Or cock even.." The further Steve got into his proposition, the more he regretted even walking into he trailer in the first place. Eddie's eyes were black, but his face was expressionless. He was staring at Steve with such a silent rage, it felt like the whole god damn trailer park had frozen in time.
A long sigh left his nose, and his grip on her hips tightened. She winced when he stood, her legs finding home around his waist as his hand supported her ass. His dick somehow managed to stay snug and painfully hard inside her. The way he carried her slowly over to Steve was effortless and intimating all at once.
"You want to fuck my girl, Harrington?" He stood over Steve despite only being an inch or so taller than him. Steve visibly gulped at Ed's.
"cause Harrington, you know or actually I think we both know.. she would much rather be pounded in the back of my van, high as shit on the crap I wouldn't even sell the Jocks than brush against your jeans once to make you shoot your load in your jeans"
Eddie's eyes dropped to his lips, then slowly down to the tent hed made in his Levi's. An idea popped into his head as evidenced by the cocky grin on smug ass face.
"Well big boy, why not give her the best of both, ay?" Steve's eyebrows furrowed but he was still hooked on every word Eddie said. Without warning, Eds had shoved his sweet girl towards Steve until his back hit the counter in the kitchen. A choked moan left Steve's throat as her ass met his boner, tho a high pitched whimper left hers as the tip of Eddie hit in just the right spot on impact.
Steve wanted to protest to this- it was so wrong in so many ways but Eddie was giving his permission so maybe it was okay... Just this once... To touch what he claimed was his. The whole group knew Eddie was very possessive, especially when it came to her. They all knew he relentlessly bullied the poor girl but they all knew that if he stopped giving her attention, she would start provoking him. The prolonged c*ckwarming was probably even a punishment for teasing him a few days prior but Steve also figured it could just be standard practice for Eddie to tease to this extreme.
"Hold her steady," Eddie's hands dropped from her, causing Steve to fumble and grab her hips before she fell. "I'm gonna fuck her until you've busted a load, Kay Harrington?"
She was experiencing pure pleasure; fully given in to subspace when Eddie started fucking her. She couldn't fully comprehend what was happening but she knew she loved it.
Steve was putty in Eddie's hands. He finally understood why she would always run back to Eddie even though he treated her like shit. There was something about him that was special. Addicting almost. A string of "oh shit.. oh fuck" left Steve's mouth as the fat of her ass dry humped his boner. The fact it was coming from Eddie fucking her, and not just her grinding on him like they were at a party or something made it so much hotter to him.
Eddies eyes were focused on his girl. He'd only fucked her this rough a handful of times before, but he always kept his full focus on her. Though this time his attention was divided between them both. Her hands gripped the hair at the base of his head, and her moans were muffled into his neck as she tried to pull him as close to her as she possibly could. He was already inside her though, couldn't get much closer than that.
"She's getting clingy, Harrington.." Eddie's eyes met Steve's. "She's gonna cum, are you gonna let her?"
"Oh fuck, yeah, honey cum for me, ple-" Eddie's hand gripped Steve's face, forcing his lips into a pout.
"She's not for you, she's mine." His voice was low and dangerous. His hips never faltered throughout this, pulling Steve towards him and forcing a passionate kiss to his lips. Her eyes moved to look at Eddie but the sight of them making out was enough to push her over the edge. She was shaking, practically screaming through her intense but lovely orgasm. The stuttering of her hips against Steve's painful erection was enough for him to shoot his load. Eddie smirked into the kiss, knowing what just happened proved him right. He pulled away but kept his arm on Steve's shoulder, his other arm wrapping around his girl. Steve looked beyond embarrassed, and ashamed of how much he enjoyed what just happened.
"I'm gonna move you to the couch, keep your mouth open for me okay?" Eddie pecked his girls temple, and gently pulled out from her for the first time in potentially two hours now. She whimpered at the empty, almost painful feeling he left behind but she was okay. Her chest was heaving with her trying to catch her breath and Steve wished she was shirtless so he could see it all. He watched her flatten out her tongue and wait patiently for Eddie to finish with her. The first time he caught sight of Eddie's dick was a shocking experience for Steve. He didn't know they could be so thick.. He watched the ropes of his spend shoot and fall into her mouth and bit his lip. He wasn't sure who he was most jealous of, which is a new and confusing feeling for poor little Stevie.
She closed her mouth, but she didn't swallow. Instead she looked up to Eddie with her glassy big doe eyes, and he nodded at her, stroking her cheek with his thumb. Her mouth opened again, strings dangling between her tongue and the roof of her mouth. A blob of Eddie's spit landed in the centre of her mouth, and Steve expected her to recoil in disgust but she only hmm'd in content, laying back on the sofa.
"Good girl." Eddie booped her nose, then put his dick back in his jeans. "I'm gonna run you a bath, give Steve a taste while I'm gone? I think he deserves a little taste huh?"
Eddie turned and walked towards the bathroom, patting Steve's shoulder as he went. Steve was hesitant to move at first, but when he saw her waiting patiently for him he rushed to her side and put his arm around her.
"Are you okay? Does he treat you like that often?" He whispered, checking she was alright with Eddie's harsh behaviour towards her. She only hmm'd again but in a cheerier tone and without warning kissed Steve. He froze at first but soon leaned into it when her tongue forced it's way into his mouth. It was so salty and sticky and gross but he couldn't get enough. When she finally had enough- the poor girl was exhausted- she gripped his cheeks like Eddie did but with less intensity and spat the remaining spend into his mouth. She wiped her mouth with her sleeve and fell back into the cushion, waiting for Eddie.
"He likes it when you swallow.." she said before slipping into a deep sleep. Steve did as he was told but he didn't like the sour aftertaste left behind. He couldn't decide if it was shame or just the spunk of his friend burning his throat.
Eddie walked back into the room seemingly perfectly fine, much to the shock of Steve. He princess lifted his girl, and pecked her forehead as he carried her to the bathroom. A minutes passed when Eddie emerged again, his sleeves were rolled up to his elbow but the ends were still damp from putting his girl in the bath.
"She's having a soak now. She'll be fine in a few hours, I got her." Eddie told Steve, knowing he would be worrying about her. Ever the gentleman, of course. "We've been a lot rougher than that before, she just needs some coddling and a break from reality."
The reality being his bullying. He never said it out loud but he was fully self aware of his actions towards her. He sat back in the seat at his desk and continued writing stuff down for his campaign.
"Never ask to take her 'off my hands' again. She's my girl, and she likes it how it is okay?" Eddie's eyes never met Steve's. He couldn't tell if Eds was trying to intimidate him or if he was embarrassed of the toxic relationship he'd built with the girl Steve knew Ed's secretly loved. Eddie cleared his throat and finally looked at Steve again.
"So the girl you were on a date with? Continue?"
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𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐀𝐅𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒
summary: meeting the handsome guy from the shop next door doesn't go quite as you expect it to
pairing: tattoo artist! kazuha x florist gn! reader
warnings: none except for kazuha himself, just pure fluff
modern au series || genshin impact masterlist
The breeze gently swayed the wind chimes decorating your humble flower shop as you rearranged some of the bigger plants. Despite the warm spring weather and bright sun, it was a tranquil day at the shop. With no holiday around the corner, people weren’t exactly barging down your door at this time of day.
As you were about to repot some of the flowers which had grown too big for their respective pots, your doorbell signalled a customer entering. Quickly, you made your way over into your sales area. In the middle of your shop stood a white-haired man, his mask pulled down and hair tied into a ponytail. When he turned to you, a red streak among the white caught your attention, as well as a few piercings. You couldn’t recall seeing him here before but he seemed somewhat familiar anyway.
“Hi there, how may I help you?” you greeted cheerfully.
“Hello,” he replied warmly, crimson eyes forming crescents as he smiled. In the back of your mind, you noted how beautiful he was. “I was looking for a bouquet or maybe a small potted plant, I’m not quite sure yet. It’s supposed to be a gift. Do you have anything you’d recommend?”
“Sure, please take a look over here.” You walked him over to a small area of potted plants sitting in aesthetically decorated pots. “Personally, I prefer gifting plants like these over cut flowers. Not only do they last a lot longer, they’re also easy to care for. In the end, the choice is yours though, and I’d be happy to show you the already arranged bouquets or bind a unique one for you.”
“Thank you very much, these are perfect though. My mother has a thing for house plants,” he chuckled. Ah, so it was a present for his mother. “Oh, is that a maple leaf over there?”
Stepping aside to let him take a closer look, you nodded. “It is, nicely spotted. I think they make for great decorative elements, given their striking colour.”
“It happens that I’m quite fond of them, too.” The man rolled up the left sleeve of his white jacket to reveal an intricate tattoo sleeve of what appeared to be maple leafs swirling in the wind. “They remind me of home.”
“Wow,” you said, in awe at the artwork, “that is amazing. Whoever drew this must be seriously talented.”
“Yeah, Xiao put his all into this. I drew the actual piece though, so I’m giving myself some credit here,” he sheepishly confessed and scratched his neck. “Ah, Xiao is my colleague. We actually work at the studio next door.”
“So that’s why I thought I had seen you before. It’s nice to meet you, neighbour,” you laughed before giving him your name.
“What a beautiful name, it suits you well.” The melodic lilt of his smooth voice made heat creep up your neck. “My name is Kazuha.”
For a moment, neither of you said anything and it seemed as though the world had stopped as you watched the sunlight break in his crimson eyes. Then with a snap, you remembered where you were and why you were there. You quickly cleared your throat and held up the small plant to him.
“Is this going to be your choice then or would you rather look around a little longer?”
“As much as I’d love to have an excuse to stay, I do think she’d like this one very much,” he said. As you walked over to the register and checked out the plant, you tried not to think about his words too much, otherwise you might not have been able to do much else. When all was said and done, Kazuha pulled his mask up again, yet you could still see his smile beam from his eyes. “Well then, it was nice getting to know you. I hope we’ll see each other more in the future.”
“I hope so too. Have a nice day and feel free to stop by whenever you’d like.”
The doorbell chimed again as Kazuha left with a small wave, which you returned shakily before you buried your face in your hands. Did this really just happen? Did this beautiful man say he wanted to see you again? Was he actually flirting or just being polite? You thought it best not to interpret too much into it, lest you get your hopes up, but your heart was beating out of your chest anyway.
You calmed down over the next few days, although the first couple of times a customer came in, your heart -the traitor- skipped a beat and you mentally kicked yourself for acting like a lovesick fool over a guy you had met once. Slowly but surely though, it was business as usual again and your encounter with him didn’t occupy the forefront of your mind anymore.
Until one afternoon, on which you were faced with striking crimson eyes, that was. You blinked a few times before your brain rebooted and you scrambled for something to say.
“K-Kazuha! Nice to see you again,” you greeted, not very professionally, might you add. “Here for another potted plant?”
Fortunately he chuckled about your clumsy attempt at a joke before gently shaking his head. “No, not today. My mother was quite delighted though, so thank you very much for the recommendation.”
“Not at all, you’re the one who picked after all.” Hiding your fidgeting hands behind your back, you tried your best to hold eye contact. “What brings you here then?”
“Ah you see, I'm here to ask a small favour.” At the curious tilt of your head, he continued. “I was wondering if I could stay here for a while to sketch. Last time I was here, I couldn’t help but feel inspired by all the beautiful flowers. I understand if you say no though.”
“No,” you said immediately before catching yourself. “I mean, no, I don’t mind. I’m very flattered actually. Just make yourself comfortable.”
With a warm ‘thank you’, Kazuha settled in a sunny corner of your shop and pulled pencil and paper from his bag. At first you were a little nervous with him there, hyper-aware of your every movement, but it wasn’t long before you found comfort in his presence.
This became a regular occurrence afterwards. Kazuha would come over to draw whenever he didn’t have any clients booked as you went about your business, every now and then insisting to help you move a heavy pot to make himself useful. Somewhen down the line, he started bringing you coffee or take-out after learning your preferences and vehemently resisted having you pay him back. At one point, you started to wonder whether his coworkers missed him at all.
“They’ll live without me,” he laughed. “And even if, it’s not like I’m far away.”
Another major plus of having Kazuha around was getting a glimpse of his newest pieces, either through a peek over his shoulder or just straight-up asking him. There was something so vivid about his sketches, as if he transferred the vitality of the flowers directly onto the page and you were blown away every time.
One evening, you were sitting in your shop well after closing time. The two of you hadn’t planned to spend the night in, but as fate would have it, it started to heavily pour down as Kazuha was about to leave. So you, without any selfish ulterior motives, offered him to stay until the rain let up.
That was how you found yourself eating some of the pastries he had brought you earlier while Kazuha was drawing vines and flowers onto your arm after you asked him what kind of tattoo he thought would suit you. As he worked, it gave you a great opportunity to study him.
His light brows were slightly furrowed as he concentrated, his eyes firmly fixed on your skin and his teeth biting down on his plush bottom lip every other minute. The touch of his left hand, holding and angling your arm as he needed it, sent chills up your spine and the pressure from the pen felt more intimate than it should have. Your body was set ablaze with nerves almost as if you got a real tattoo.
All too soon, Kazuha withdrew the pen from your skin, kept his other hand, however, on your arm, sliding it down a little further so it rested almost over yours. His thumb traced some of the lines almost absentmindedly. If he kept this up, you were afraid you’d melt into a puddle right on the spot, not that that would be such a bad way to go out. Then, he slowly lifted his gaze to meet yours through his long lashes and your breath hitched. You were actually sitting across from some kind of ethereal being, you were sure of it.
“So,” he started, voice low in the dimly lit shop, “what do you think?”
“I think it’s beautiful,” you replied without hesitation.
“I’m flattered, but perhaps,” he gave you a sly smile, “you should take a look at the tattoo first?”
Heat bloomed on your cheeks as you averted your eyes. “All your art is gorgeous though, it’s not like I’d have to look to know it’s true,” you mumbled.
Kazuha wore his faint blush a lot more gracefully than you did as he too looked down to take in the lines on your skin in their entirety. The motive he’d chosen was a branch of flowers wrapping around your underarm, detailed and fine, despite the less than ideal equipment to work with. Between the petals, there was one or the other maple leaf peeking through, causing you to smile. You couldn’t help but wonder what it would look like if it was actually inked onto your skin.
“It makes me happy to hear you have so much trust in me,” he genuinely said.
“Looks like I seriously have to think about getting a tattoo now,” you laughed, although there was actual seriousness bleeding into it. “Perhaps I should make an appointment with… what was his name? Xiao?”
“Come on, gorgeous, you can’t tease me like this,” he gasped in faux offence. “You wouldn’t rob me of the honour of being the one to tattoo you, right?”
“I could never,” you breathed, goosebumps rising all over your arm from where he continued to touch you. And Kazuha seemed to notice it too.
“Are you cold? Here, have my jacket.” Before you could refuse, he’d already stepped around the table and draped the garment over your shoulders. You could feel his body heat still emanating from it, the pleasant scent of his cologne surrounding you. “We wouldn’t want you catching a cold, would we?”
You hummed as a response, brain not procuring anything more profound at the newfound proximity. Just like the first time you met, you lost yourself in his swirling pools of maple but this time nothing was there to yank you back to stop you from drowning in them.
“Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are?” Kazuha quietly asked, almost as if talking more to himself. “I truly can’t recall anything which could compare.”
“I can,” you countered. When he raised a brow, you continued. “He’s standing right in front of me, actually.”
“I find that hard to believe,” he said fondly. One of the hands previously resting on your shoulders trailed over your skin, light as a feather, before cupping your cheek as if you were a delicate flower. “Hopefully this is not too forward, but… May I kiss you?”
“I’d love nothing more.”
Guided by his hand, you rose from your seat to meet Kazuha halfway before closing your eyes. When your lips met, your first thought was how his lips were as pillowy soft as you imagined. Yours moved seamlessly against them, as if you had done this a hundred times already, yet it was still excitingly new at the same time. Threading your hand into the base of his snowy hair, you carefully tested the waters but were immediately rewarded with a blissful sigh and an arm wrapping around your waist, Kazuha’s fingers splaying over the small of your back and pressing you impossible closer to his chest.
Only pulling back far enough to speak against your lips, half-lidded eyes gazed into yours as his thumb brushed your cheekbone like the wind caressed the leaves on a tree. “I almost don’t want to stop.”
“Then don’t”, you whispered.
“You have no idea what you do to me, love,” Kazuha groaned before diving back in, this time deepening the kiss almost immediately. Neither of you noticed, nor cared, that the rain had stopped a while ago, too lost in one another to think about much else.
But, quite unfortunately, both of you needed air to live, so you had to reluctantly part eventually. While you breathed heavily, trying to force oxygen back into your lungs, Kazuha peppered a myriad of playful kisses along your jaw and the side of your neck, your giggles reverberating around the shop at the tickling sensation. When he resurfaced, there was a bright spark in his eyes as he mirrored your smile.
“Even if this might not be the proper order in which to do this, I’d love to take you out on a date one of these days,” he said, seeking out your hand with his and intertwining them. “And hopefully a second one after that.”
“A date, huh?” Running the hand still slung over his shoulder through his hair, you mused lightheartedly. “Sounds like an awful lot of effort to get a new client to tattoo, don’t you think?”
“What can I say,” he played along, “I’m very devoted to the things I hold dear.”
“I don’t doubt that,” you said sincerely, catching on to the double meaning behind his words. “Seems as if I have fallen for your scheme then.
“A date sounds lovely.”
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