Edward, Alice, and Jasper at their 23rd Rosalie and Emmett wedding
Edward is happy that those two are happy, but as an emo virgin with no one to love, he thinks it’s sappy and gross (not ironic at all 🤪)
Alice is PUMPED for every single one, and I know for a FACT that she’s got a photo album of JUST Rosalie’s weddings
Jasper likes seeing Alice happy, and he likes to show off his dance moves. That’s it tho. He loves Rosalie and all, but by the 9th wedding he was beyond bored
Emmett doesn’t really mind, but he knows that this is what makes Rosie happy, so he’ll go to the ends of the earth for the 300000 special days that woman deserves - and he still doesn’t think that’s enough for his absolute angel of a wife. His proposal is different every single time, and Emmett gives it 110% every 👏 single 👏 time 👏
Rosalie pretends all she wants is a big fancy party, but she really really is a hopeless romantic, and likes to share as many romantic moments with Emmett as possible. And she likes to see her family dressed up and edwards suffering
I really would’ve liked if Bella had a special interest in history and fashion and antiques cause like imagine the Cullens don’t get discovered by solely because of Edward but because Bella notices shit about their clothes and how they talk and is like “huh.” And also I think the Cullens forgetting how time works since they’re immortal and don’t sleep is just a funny concept
- she’s like “hey Edward does your family go antiquing” and he’s like “uh no why do you ask” “oh it’s just your sister Rosalie’s broach is from the 1957 spring collection of-”
- “why is your edition of Macbeth from 1911?”
- “does it bother you that your brother Jasper calls it the war of northern aggression like wtf is that”
- “yknow Emmett asked me if Charlie was a soldier in World War II”
- “Alice just asked me if I watch I Love Lucy on the tube? Is she being ironic?”
- “Ever notice how your dad says thou sometimes?” And “When I was at the hospital I saw him cross ‘hysteria’ out of my patient notes”
- “your mom must really like Gibson girl updos, she’s always sporting one at the store”
- “I’m like sixty percent the sweater you’re wearing was dyed using arsenic”
Carlisle after receiving a call from the school saying that Emmett drop kicked Edward across the football field while Jasper did 58 consecutive backflips in the cafeteria and Alice and Rosalie had a dance off that leveled the Gym: