#also DRE AM HOUSE IS SO GOOD

[becauseimswagman1]

Toxic Love

A/N:.... it's been forever since I've posted...I'M BACK WITH THE SMUT GUYS. Don't be afraid to comment either!!!

A/N#2: he got some pretty teeth y'all

This for you @itsbackwoodsbby 🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾

(She wrote something for me. Gotta get her backkkk)

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To say that you and your man are a toxic couple is downplaying just how toxic y’all actually are. He cheats and cheats, yet you stay. “Why?” is the million-dollar question. You could say you love him, but you could also say you love the money he makes. See your man is a drug dealer, but not just any ole drug dealer, he’s feared. He’s not to be messed with in any way, so what made you finally get his lying and cheating ass back? The most recent bitch he cheated on you with.

Her name is whor- Hazel. Hazel been tryna get at your man forever. You’re surprised he even fucked that fuck-anything-that-walks, homewrecking ass girl, but niggas will be niggas you guess. You’ve come to realize that they’ll fuck anyone and anything.

Anyways, you got him back by fucking his fine ass, big dick-having-ass cousin. Guess it really does run the family, but the dick was trash and the head was bomb, but if your man asks then all of it was better than him.

You could only imagine how crazy he acted once he found out, but he was almost done with his drops for the day so you’d find out in a minute or two.

---------------------------------

You hear a car door slam and shortly after the front door slam too, “Ayo what the fuck am I hearing bout you fucking my cousin Dre?!”

You almost laughed, his anger was comical to you. You admit you did act like this when you found out he cheated the first time, but as smart as he is… you figured he would’ve figured everything out by now.

You shrugged at him, “Oh they talking about that already? Damn word get around fast. And don’t be slamming the doors in this house!”

“It’s true? You sit up here living this lavish ass lifestyle and you decide to act like one of yo lil friends and fuck anybody with a pulse.”

Okay, he was doing too much now. It’s not like you slept with half the motherfuckers in his gang unlike someone (Hazel).

You stood up off the couch, “Nah, Trevante fuck you! I don’t know why you tryna make me out to be some type of hoe but that shit not gone fly. Yo black ass acting like I fucked yo brother or something. It was just your cousin so back up off me.”

He walked over to you and got in your face, “Tell me that shit not true. Tell me it’s not so I can go pop the nigga that told me.”

Damn, did he have the grill in today? Top AND bottom too? Mhmmmm.

You stared up into his eyes as innocently as you could while he looked down at you, “Sorry baby, but… it’s true. And it was sooo good, too. He fucked me way better than you.”

God, he’s wearing the cologne that makes you soak your panties in record time.

“Oooooh now he’s better than me? I’ll murk that nigga right now, blood or not. Keep on testing me, ma.”

He’s gonna fuck you up. He’s no longer mad at the get back, but the thoughts of another man fucking you better and that you could possibly leave him because of that haunt him now.

“I’ll be here to wash your clothes when you get back. Just don’t come in here dripping blood and shit. It’ll be a bitch to get out our new carpets.”

Trevante could see how unphased you were about this whole thing and it only pissed him off more. You gave away your pussy and that belonged to him.

He grabbed your neck and got real close to your face, “Say he’s better than me again, and watch what happens to you.”

You smirked, this is exactly what you wanted, “He’s better than you. Maybe this will teach you not to fuck with dirty ass hoes.”

He chuckled, tightening his hold on your neck a little, “So you mad I fucked one of yo lil friends?”

“She’s not-” He cut you off, “Right. She’s not. But you really went out and did what you did as a get back? You put on your big girl panties and took a shot at me? That’s a mistake, baby.”

He pecked your lips then threw you over his shoulder, “You gone regret that shit.”

“Baby-”

“Nah, don’t “baby” me now. You was just talking all that shit, it’s time to put your money where your mouth is.”

Trevante took you to your shared room and sat you down on your feet then grabbed your neck again, making you look at him, “You gonna be good for Daddy?”

“Mhm.” you avoided his heated stare. You knew what he had in store for you was gone have you acting right...for now.

He tightened his grip on your neck, “Words ma, or you not gone get what you deserve.”

“I’ll be daddy’s good gir-” he adjusted your head to look at him in his eyes, “Good what?”

“I’ll be daddy’s good little slut.”

He pecked your lips and let your neck go, “Take your panties off. Ass up, face down.”

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Taglist: lmk if you wanna be added or taken off

@prettyisasprettydoes1306 @thatone-girly

@blackerthings @roguekiki @enigmadivine

@novaniskye @ziayamikaelson @twocentuar

#becauseimswagman1 #x black reader #smut #trevante rhodes #trevante rhodes x reader #trevante rhodes smut #black fanfiction #black fanfic writer

[l8rs-gat0rs]

Okay I literally just found your account with your post talking about Billie in SWARM I WEN ABSOLUTELY FERAL YOU DONT UNDERSTAND SHE IS ETHREAL

…okay anyways I have a request

So what if you end at the group’s house and you get the counseling cause like you have bad anxiety and social anxiety and you just push everyone away and run from your problems so that’s essentially how you end up at the house. And then you end up wanting to leave like Dre did but it’s because you don’t think that they can help you. BUT Eva convinces you to stay and like you slowly fall in love…or something..maybe add some smut. Literally add anything you want I am just so excited to read it♥️

Save Me From Myself

Pairing: Eva x Female reader

Wow thank you so so much for this request! I actually have social anxiety so I am excited to write about it. Also trust me, I went feral too. She is definitely ethereal. The sexual tension she had with Dre was crazyyyy and she's such a good actress, the micro expressions and everything really got me. I didn't put smut into it only because it feels more like a soft fluff story that doesn't really need any smut, so I hope you're okay with that :)

Warning(s): angst, social anxiety, general anxiety, slow burn, y/n use

summary: You have social anxiety and Eva has been helping you with it. After messing up a game of Twister, you feel like you can't be helped so you decide to leave. Eva stops you from leaving, which leads to a confession...

Word count: 2k

Disclaimer: I have never talked to a therapist abt my anxiety or social anxiety at all, so If some things aren't accurate I apologize, but I'm just writing down what I have experienced and how I interpret it.

Special thanks to @hereforthepoet for helping me with this fic :)

~~~~Happy Reading!~~~~

You lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling, replaying the story of how you ended up here over and over again in your head.

Eva had found you when you were a blushing, stuttering mess trying to speak to the waitress in a restaurant.

Were you blushing out of embarrassment? Yeah.

Anxiety? Yeah.

Because she was hot? Absolutely.

Eva smiled at you when you looked up from your head in your hands and made eye contact with her while she was sitting at a table facing you.

You groaned and shoved your face back into your hands because yet another hot woman had seen you embarrass yourself.

When you looked back up you jumped a little, seeing as Eva was now right in front of you.

The two of you had food together, Eva noticing your stuttering, rambling and fidgeting with your rings. The tell-tale signs of your anxiety.

You told her about how you managed to push everyone in your family away after your parents died, you were an only child so there weren't many people to push away, but still.

You lived by yourself in a tiny apartment, you were thinking about getting a cat, but then, Eva invited you back here with promises to help with your anxiety.

But here you were, in the bed, Eva had lent to you.

You felt like a lost cause, all the other girls in the group had shown major signs of progress over the course of a few weeks, but you were still here, holed up in your room because you could barely even talk to the girls, despite the fact it had been almost a month already and you have had numerous sessions with Eva.

You heard a knock on the door and you mustered a small "Come in."

You looked up and saw Eva walking through the door, causing your heart to race.

Come on y/n, don't embarrass yourself in front of her for the 10,000th time, please.

"Hey y/n, why aren't you out there with the rest of the girls, we're playing twister right now."

Don't stutter.

"Oh- uh, I don't know, I'm don't-

wait. I mean I don't-

I- I'm NOT feeling that great, I guess."

Jesus Christ.

She looked at you for a moment before walking closer to your bed and sitting down on the corner of it, by your thighs.

"Remember what I told you during our last session y/n?" Eva started, as she leaned over you, bracing herself up with one hand on the other side of your thighs, and using the other to check your temperature.

Your brain short-circuited as soon as you felt her skin against yours.

"I told you, the reason you stutter is that you either rehearse what you are going to say over and over in your head before saying it, or you think so fast that the words mess up when you try to say them out loud. Either way, you need to focus on what you want to say rather than thinking of all the ways you could say what you want to say."

"Yeah, I know..." Uou muttered.

"Well how can you be working on it when you don't even hang out with the rest of the girls?" Eva smiled patiently.

"I'm working on it, I just..." You trailed off, looking anywhere but Eva's eyes.

"Hey, eyes," Eva said, causing your eyes to immediately shoot to hers.

"Good girl. Now, why don't you come out of your room and join us." Eva got up from the bed and held her hand out for you to take it.

Your stomach turned at the Praise but you ignored it.

You took Eva's hand and picked yourself out of bed.

Eva didn't let go of your hand as she led you out to the living room. You willed your hand not to get sweaty.

"Hey guys, look who's here!" Eva announced to the group.

"Woooo y/n!" Cricket cheered while holding the spinner.

"Come, join us!" Isis urged, smiling at you from under Salem's arm.

You looked at Eva uncertainty, but she just gave you a patient smile and nodded, urging you to join them.

"Uhh, yeah, sure." You nodded, looking back at the pile of girls twisted around the mat.

Your heart started to beat rapidly.

Come on y/n, you cant be the one to fuck up the whole game.

Don't lose, don't lose, don't lose....

"Okay y/n, let's spin for you."

"Right leg green!"

You moved your right leg to the open green dot.

"Eva, want to join?" Cricket asked as she spun the spinner.

"Nah, I'm good. I like to watch" Eva said with a smirk.

You shivered at her words even though it was a normal comment.

Jesus Christ y/n get a grip. She's your mentor.

But she had also been the one holding your hand through the entire process of trying to get over your anxieties.

Did you have feelings for her?

"Left foot red" Cricket called out to Grace.

"Don't fuck it up!" Audrey laughed, balancing on one hand.

"Shut up!" Grace responded playfully, before carefully placing her foot down.

"Bam!" She cheered, causing the other girls to giggle.

You smiled a little but the tension would not leave your chest as the game continued.

The girls keep playing as normal, each taking their sweet time moving to their respective places while the others urge them to hurry up. You're trying to focus, to stay present, to participate...but all you can think of is the loud beating of your heart. How the girls' laughter fades and your consciousness seems to trade places with your subconscious; "They're only letting you play out of pity." "You need to leave before you embarrass yourself." "You look ridiculous standing like this and they know it, they're all thinking it." You vaguely hear directions for someone's turn being called but there's a water-like roaring in your ears and your palms are sweaty and-and-and-

"Y/n!? Right hand yellow?"

"What?"

You can't think slow enough, you can't move fast enough, your body is shaking and- 

Everyone's falling. A twisted mess of loud laughing bodies and you can't breathe.

"Y/n? Are you okay? Breathe!" You hear Eva say.

You shoot up from the pile of girls and suddenly the laughter has died and they're all looking at you with concerned expressions.

Staring.

They think you're pathetic.

You're so embarrassing.

"I can't do this anymore!" You suddenly shout through your heavy breathing.

"Woah, it's okay y/n-" Cricket starts, putting the twister spinner down.

"No, it's not! Look at all of you! You're getting better every day. But me? I'm hopeless. I can't even play a game of twister without fucking it up! I can't stay here any longer. I've overstayed my welcome and I can't be helped. I'm too broken." You said before turning away from them.

You heard the girls start to protest and get up but out of the corner of your eye you saw Eva shush them and make them sit back down. Tears started spilling from your eyes and you ran to your room.

When you got to your room, you took your suitcase out of your closet and opened it on your bed.

You started to pack when you heard Eva's hurried footsteps approach your door.

"Y/n, what are you doing?" She said sadly.

"I'm leaving. I can't stay here anymore" you were unable to look at her so you continued quickly packing.

"Hey. Stop." Eva said as she gently stopped you from going over to your suitcase with the clothes in your hand.

You stopped and looked down at the floor, still unable to look at her.

"Look at me. I wanna see those gorgeous eyes." She gently grabbed your chin and turned your face to look at her.

"Here, give me those," she took the clothes from your hands and put them on the other bed that was next to yours.

"Sit." She guided you to sit down next to where she left your clothes.

You sat down and took a shuddering breath in as tears continued to fall and your lip quivered as you silently cried.

"You're even gorgeous when you cry." Eva smiled, causing you to let out a choked laugh as you tried to halt your tears.

"You're just saying that" You felt your face heating up.

"No, I'm not. don't degrade yourself like that. You are truly beautiful, and I'll keep saying it till it gets through your pretty little head." She got on her knees in front of you and put her hands on your thighs.

You looked down at her hands on your thighs, hyper-aware of her touch.

"Y/n please don't leave." Eva spoke up somberly.

You looked back to her eyes before responding.

"I- I can't Eva. My thoughts are so confused a-and I can't be helped. I don't deserve to stay here." You sniffed as your tears subsided.

"That's not true! Everyone is able to be helped, some people just have a longer process than others. Also, even with all the facts considered, you're here because I want you to be, not because you're a patient or something." Eva explained.

"Yeah, I guess...but I'm still...c-confused." You internally cursed yourself for stuttering and you looked down back to her hands that were still on your thighs.

"About what?" She smiled softly.

You sighed heavily trying not to stutter.

But of course, you did.

"Y-" You sighed in annoyance as Eva looked at you expectantly.

"Y- You!" You managed to get out, causing Eva to let out a laugh.

"You're confused about me?" She asked with a smirk.

"Yes! Why is that funny!?" You huffed.

She laughed a little again before responding.

"It's not, it's not, Why are you confused about me?" She asked you curiously.

"Well, I- I don't know. Just...my feelings towards you..." You said more quietly.

Eva's hands rode a little higher on your thighs causing your eyes to widen for a second before you steeled your expression.

"And what are you currently feeling towards me?" Eva asked, staring down at your lips.

"Attraction" You breathed out, getting lost in the way she looked at your lips.

"And, that's a bad thing?" She smirked, her eyes looking back up to yours.

"I- I mean no! But like, you're my mentor or whatever. I shouldn't be feeling attracted to you. Right?" You backtracked.

"Who said that?" She laughed.

Wait, that's true...

"Uhhh, no one I guess. It just- I don't know I thought it might be wrong or something. You never dated anyone else here." You gestured to the door.

"Who says I didn't?" Eva smirked once again.

"O-Oh! I'm sorry I didn't mean to assume!" Your eyes widened.

"It's okay, don't worry about it." Eva smiled.

"S-so, who was it?" You said quietly after nodding.

"Isis, it wasn't very long though. We both decided we were better as friends" Eva shrugged.

"Oh, I see." You said, mulling over all the interaction you've seen Eva had with Isis.

"But back to your feelings?" Eva urged you to continue with her brows raised and a questioning tone.

"I guess, over my time here I've been slowly falling for you and...I've tried to suppress it, but I guess, the feelings have always been there, bubbling up,"

You sighed once again before continuing.

"I mean, I don't know... You're just so...." You started, before looking at Eva and feeling your face heat up.

"Go onnnn." Eva urged.

"Hot." You ended quietly.

"What was that? I couldn't hear you!" Eva said loudly.

"Oh shut u-"

Before you could finish your reflexive response, or even have time to be anxious about it, Eva pushed up off her knees and kissed you.

You were shocked at first but you quickly closed your eyes and melted into her lips.

You couldn't lie and say you hadn't thought of kissing her multiple times.

Once Eva pulled away she sat back onto her knees.

"I can't lie, I've thought about kissing you so many times." She let out a breathy laugh.

"Woah did you just read my mind?" You pulled back shocked.

"What?" She looked confused.

"Nevermind,"

You shook your head before continuing,

"Okay, back to kissing."

"I think..." You added shyly.

#fanfiction #fanfic #fanfiction writer #eva x reader #eva swarm #swarm (show) #billie eilish x you #fluff #gxg #gxg fan fiction #billie eilish x reader #billie eilish fanfic #billie eilish x y/n

[saneijeijei]

[Marriage of convenience​]

[This is a fanfiction collaboration with @ship-ovnik​]

[ 1 / 2 ]

Due to an open conflict with Marquis Ellen and his daughter, the queen of the empire, Duke Eckart is forced, under pressure from three factions, to sit at the same table with the Marquis and come to a peaceful resolution of the conflict (I have not come up with a reason, but I will be glad to listen to your options in the comments). Almost all proposals are extremely unprofitable and unacceptable for the duke - the loss of territories, mines or spheres of influence. Seeing the reaction of the head of Eckart, the Marquis suggests the most "harmless" thing - to marry one of his sons to the daughter of the viscount, who has served the Ellen family from generation to generation, or to marry his daughter to the prince.

For a duke to give up a child for his own benefit is worse than death, a person who grew up in love and married for love will never be able to give his child to a loveless marriage with a light heart, and because of exceptional benefits, unlike a marquis. He was already ready to yell at Ellen, as he waved him off and suggested that he think about it until tomorrow. After all, there are no options, the conflict must be resolved in the shortest possible time, because the emperor himself is closely watching all this.

Enraged, the Duke leaves. All the way, he can't find a place for himself, his heart is squeezed with pain and awareness of the precarious situation his family is in now. When he returns to the house, Derrick is waiting for him, who hoped for good news, but when he saw his father's dejected face, he understood everything.

"Whatever you choose, everything will lead us to certain death," he said, disappointed. "But if one of us gets married, there will be a chance.." "Don't talk nonsense, Derrick! I will not give up any of my children for money or any benefits!" "Father, but.." "I need to be alone, go to your room, we'll talk later.."

Derrick could not argue with his father's decree in any way, and left his office. On the way to his room, he crossed paths with Reynold, who, it seems, again did had a fight with Penelope. After telling him the latest news, he did not attach much importance to his brother's strange grin, which barely flashed after surprise and anger.

Penelope learned about the latest news from the mouth of the returning Reynold. She was surprised by his appearance, because just a few minutes ago, they were arguing, almost tearing their voices out of rage and anger towards each other.

"Maybe you'll be of some use if you get married? You're not creating anything but problems for us"

Hurtful words broke her heart and unable to stand it, Penelope herself came to her father and asked for an engagement.

"If this is the only thing that can save the Duchy of Eckart – I agree, father" "Penelope, what kind of father do you think I am, if you think that I will marry you to one of them?" "You are first of all a duke, and then a father, You always told me so when I made a scandal for which you had to answer" "Penelope…" "I have done too much wrong to you, Father. I know my place and I'm not asking for more than what you gave me. If you allow something else to be taken away, it will affect the reputation of the family and financial opportunities. If Derrick or Reynold marries the daughter of the houses that are subordinate to the Marquis family, they will also get the Eckart family under power… is that what you have worked so hard for?"

The man was silent for a long time, pale with grief. He rubbed his face tiredly and frowned at his daughter. But after a long silence, he spoke again.

"The Marquis did not talk about who my daughter should marry from the two princes. Therefore, we will use his offer against him – you will not marry the younger prince, but the older one. I will immediately send a messenger to him, and I will offer a good deal, which we will seal with your marriage."

Penelope clenched her hands on her dress, but did not contradict, even though she knew about the terrible reputation of the Crown Prince and could not even think what fate awaits her as a wife.

"Penelope, I will do everything possible so that you don't get hurt in any way and feel like a guest in the palace. As soon as I can prove that our family is innocent and the Marquis is behind everything, we will dissolve the marriage and you will return home. I promise."

Squeezing his daughter's hand, the duke tried to smile encouragingly, although it turned out to be extremely sad. Of all his children, only Penelope decided on such a serious act and helped him find a way out, and how tragic it is for her father to understand that he will have to give her to the imperial family as a future wife to one of the princes.

That evening, a letter arrived from the imperial palace – the Crown Prince agreed to the deal and is waiting for Penelope to arrive at the palace with the duke.

#vadd #ditoeftv #death is the only ending for a villainess #death is the only ending for the villainess #villains are destined to die #penelope eckart #penelope x callisto #penelope eckart x callisto regulus #penelope eckhart #callisto regulus #duke eckart #text #fanfic #fanfiction #vadd fanfic #ditoeftv fanfic

[queeringdiedreiausrufezeichen]

Just some thoughts about the Trailer and Teaser content for the show

(I’m so excited for this show. It’s not even funny.)

(In no particular order)

That’s going to be the cyber bully case for sure!

She looks so smug and I love it! That’s a “Oh I know more than you” look. Or a “I know you will cave in and give me the information I want eventually”

Witch case! Witch case! Witch case! AHHH!

This shot just looks so cool. I don’t have a lot to say about it, expect for the fact that I want to know more, about what ever episode that’s from. I’m suspecting the Haunted House case, because of the hints in the trailer. They seemed to have gone a different route regarding the adaptation of the case than the “original”. But I’m very much interested in this take.

Kim/Michi content my beloved 🥺 Kim looks so stern. And Michi is just like: what did I do???

Look at them! They are adorable 🤲

This quote is living in my mind rent free:

Michi: Seh ich etwa kriminell aus?

Kim: Ne, total süß.

I’m loving it. It’s cute. Kim just can’t handle it when the suspects are cute 😂😭😌 This quote made me realise how much I love the concept of the characters flirting with the suspect on accident, cause they don’t know how to handle their complicated emotions. Also in my personal opinion this is a very good ship prompt. It just has a lot of potential in my opinion.

—

There isn’t a lot of new scenes in this one that aren’t in the trailer. One thing that is new and that I just love is:

The fact that Kim canonly tunes into the police radio! I love it soo much! Because she would! She freaking would! This is so in character.

—

Haunted house episode confirmed 😌 Gosh it’s going to be so much fun!

#Youtube #I wanted to add ALT Text so bad #but I am just really lacking the brain cells for it right now #going to try add it in the future #now that I actually wrote this post it didn’t take as long as I thought it would XD #maybe I had way way more thoughts originally that I just sadly forgot #die drei ausrufezeichen serie #die drei ausrufezeichen #d3a #die drei !!! #the three detectives #My stuff D3A edition

[lala1267]

Chocolate and Vanilla (Part 3)

Summary: Claudia's revenge (black reader)

Warnings: racism, slurs, fighting, Claudia basically going insane, reader is belittled, mentions of murder/death, some sexual things (only goes as far as jerking off, its not a smut)

Not proof read btw.

I woke up in a lavish bed, it felt like I was in the clouds, it was cosy and warm. I stopped to realise that this was not my bed, it wasn't even my room, where was I? I observed the luxurious room, red carpet, princess style bed, royal vanity, and even a couch and television. I could never afford this even with my life savings, I had spent my childhood in the poor area of Jamaica and the shacks of memphis. I was working two part time jobs and was going to school just to feed me and my drunk mother who I assumed was now behind steel bars. This wasn't my room. This wasn't my house. I attempted to get up and out of the bed but I could barely move, my body was aching all over from the beating I had suffered last night from my mother. I decided to stay in the bed until I has gained strength to get out. The 'strength' that I was expecting never came. I started to worry,I had no idea where I was or who else was in this house. Heavy footsteps sounded in the hallway towards the bedroom door. They grew louder each step until the golden door know twisted as a tall, dark-haired, handsome man walked in. It was Elvis. When you saw him you were confused as to why he brought you here but a sense of comfort raised as you looked into his baby blue eyes. He sat on the edge of the royal, he lifted his hand to move some hair out of my face. I had to know where I was and why I was here, "Elvis where am I, where is my mamma?"

Elvis looked at my with a apologetic look, "oh dear, let's not talk about your mother, let's just say that she is getting what she deserves"

"Of this is about her hurting me she didn't mean it I promise, please can I see her"

"No, she is a dangerous woman. Anyway how was your sleep?"

"Good, until I woke up and found out that I was in a random castle" Elvis giggled before responding.

"Honey, it's not a castle, it's my house"

I was in shock when he said that, the boy that grew up in the poorest area of Memphis, yeah no way I was believing that.

"Don't lie Elvis, this ain't your house, not the boy that grew up in the shacks house."

Elvis looked confused

"What do you mean, it is my house"

"Oh no it ain't, you probably work at the diner like me."

Elvis slowly realise that I didn't know who he was on the TV.

"Honey, I'm a famous singer, everyone knows me, that why I can buy this house and many more if I wanted to"

"But I ain't never heard of ya"

"Oh really, well look at this then"

He got up and walked over the TV, he fiddled with the buttons before a clip of him singing and dancing like a mad man on a stage in front of thousands of people appeared. My jaw dropped, I was in shock buy I was also proud of how far he came and made a name for himself.

"Elvis I never knew you could sing and dance, I'm so proud of you" Elvis let out an awkward giggle before he replied.

"How have you never heard of me, even people from other countries know who I am"

"Well I could never afford a TV and I still can't, I'm not really into newspapers either."

His face dimmed.

" I will get a hundred TV's just for you my dear" I giggled before looking down at my body, I was wearing a silk night gown that must have costed a fortune.

"Elvis, I can't pay you back for this night gown, I can't even afford a dress that made from table clothes ,never mind a SILK night gown!"

"Honey, you don't have to pay for anything, I just wanna look after you"

I nervously smiled before he picked me up bridal style and took me to a luxurious bathroom, it had the biggest bathtub I had ever seen. He sat me on the edge of the bathtub.

"Elvis what are you doing" I said as I tilted my head and gave him puppy eyes.

"Imma give ya a nice warm bath, now lift ya arms up honey."

I hesitated but complied. He took my silk dress of and tosse it on the marble floor. I was now naked in front of a man that was 7 years older than me. I felt uncomfortable but I knew he was just trying to help me after what happened last night with my mother. He quickly looked at my bare breasts thinking that I wouldn't notice. I quickly crossed my arms other them, Elvis now knew that I had caught him peeking, he went a light shade of red.

"Get in the bath honey" the bath was already filled with bubbles and smelt like cotton candy. I didn't hesitate to step in. My body and into the world of bubbles and soap. I dipped my long curls in the water to then fully submerge my head under the water. I lifted my top half of my body out of the water, breath wet and bubbly right in front of Elvis. My head was soaked since I had dunked myself under the water, I giggled at my sillyness. Elvis giggled with me. "What did ya do that for honey"

"I've just never been in a bathtub this big in my life"

Elvis admired my bare body, he looked my up and down.

I didn't notice, but even if I did I wouldn't really care since I didn't have a dirty mind.

" you get yourself washed up and I will be in the room" he said before he got up and handed me a loofah and a soap bar. I nodded as I watched him leave the room, the door was halfway open. Elvis wasn't a perv but he was a smart man, he knew what he was doing. A large mirror faced the halfway opened door that had a perfect view of me. The bed was opposite the mirror but pushed aside to make way for the door. Elvis sat in the bed and stared me down through the mirror. I had no idea of this. I stood up, my naked body all wet and bubbly, I took the loofah and started to scrub my body gently, when I reached my breasts I heard muffled moans coming from the room that Elvis was in. I ignored it at first when I heard the same moans again as I reached my lower body,I washed and scrubed around my vagina making sure it was clean. I got worried, mabye Elvis hurt himself, that was probably why he was making these sounds. I rushed to get out of the bath, I wrapped a towel around my still soaking body, it barely covered my ass. I followed the sound of the moans, only to be met with Elvis in the bed, hand moving up and down under the sheets. I was so confused. "Elvis are you hurt, why are you making those sounds , and what are you doing" I said. Elvis quickly whipped his head to turn to me, his face turned a dark shade of red before another voice followed mine.

"Yeah Elvis, what the fuck are you doing!" Claudia yelled with her fists turning white from how tight she was clenching it. Elvis turned to Claudia, he instantly got up and out of the bed, pants unbuttoned. "Sweety I can explain!"

"There is no need to explain, I know exactly what you were doing and who you were looking at in the process!"

Elvis turned to me who was still confused as fuck. Elvis let out a relieved sigh as he realised that I didn't have a clue what he was doing under those sheets. He whipped his head straight back to Claudia as she screamed, "I expect a new designer dress by today if you want me to forgive you!"

You could tell she was just using him for his money. Claudia gave you a cold death stare before storming off downstairs. I was just in the middle of all of this and I didn't know what was going on. I tapped Elvis on the shoulder before speaking, "Elvis why is she so mad, did I do something?" I said with my poor puppy eyes the were tearing up from being overwhelmed. Evis took me into a deep hug before letting go and saying, "It's not your fault, I've just that me and Claudia have arguments sometimes" I nodded in agreement before Elvis escorted me to the closet. He opened the grand closet to reveal the most perfect dresses I could have ever dreamed of. My jaw was on the floor. Elvis giggled at my reaction. He stepped forward, he was now right behind me, I could feel his unbuttoned pants on my ass. He leaned over my back and pointed to the dresses before saying "pick anything my dear" I turned around to gaze intensely into his eyes, my breasts were touching his chest. "Elvis, why ate you doing all of this for me" he looked confused before answering, "Well I care about you and I always have, even though we never really talked, I still care about you, I know what you've been through, I heard everything those nights where your mother would hurt you, I knew." I had to take a moment to process his words. I just nodded and turned back around to pick I dress. I bent over to reach a dress, my ass pushed against his cock that was now getting hard. I didn't know this of course. I stood straight again and lifted a pretty dress in the air to show Elvis. It was pastel yellow with little pink flowered on, I had also picked up a pair of white thigh high dolly socks. I stepped way from elvis before walking past him to the bathroom to try the cloths on. I walked out of the bathroom and watched Elvis practically drule over me. The yellow dress hugged my premature hourglass figure, the socks squeezed my slightly chubby thighs, my hips where wide and my ass was perfect, my breasts were small but not to small. Due to my age my body still looked a bit child-like and I still haven't lost some of the baby chub on my tights. I wasn't chubby but I wasn't entirely skinny like all of the other white girls my age. I stood un the bathroom doorway running towards Elvis and jumping in his arms. I squealed, and giggled happily before thanking him, "oh thankyou Elvis, I've never worn a dress before, I love it!" Elvis looked into my eyes before responding, "Anything for you honey" he smiled before placing a kiss on my forhead, it took me by surprise but I can't say that I didn't like it. I jumped out of his arms, giving him doe eyes before asking, "Elvis I'm hungry, do you have any food in this house?" Elvis replied, "Yeah of course I do honey, I will get Claudia to make you some nuttella waffles" I thanked him before happily skipping downstairs whilst my long, messy, curly hair bounced on my back. Elvis looked at me with a shimmer in his eyes.

I wasn't to fond of Claudia due to her actions to me recently. But u just sucked it up before I was about to walk into the large kitchen when I saw two women. Of course the blonde, two faced one was Claudia but another block haired woman sat next to her on the dining table. She had dark eyes that looked like a void, pale skin, and she looked intimidating, but she was also drop dead gorgeous, her long back has perfectly moulded around her face, her dress a pale pink and her face like a model. I secretly listened to their conversation, tears fell down my red cheeks as I heard the words that were coming out of there mouths.

"Yeah and he had the audacity to bring home a negro! He said it was because he wanted to 'help her' but then I walked I on him jacking off to the black bitch!

"Oh my goodness really! If I were you I would do something about her, get rid of the bitch, for good"

"I know but how would I get rid of her?"

"Drive her out and do the job for her, nock her out and dump her in the middle of no where"

"Good idea, I might drive her out tomorrow and then she will be gone for good, my man will never see the bitch again."

"Haha, her hair is so raggedy aswell, she needs to straighten it."

They both laughed and where unaware that I has heard their whole conversation. My breath quickened and tears ran down my face, I ran into the back garden, I went to the horses hoping to distract myself. The horses brought back memories from when I was a kid, I used to sneak out of my house with Lana to go to the fields and ride the horses, we had been chased by the crazy farmer everytime he saw us on his field, but that didn't stop us. When I stroked Elvis's horses, I couldn't help but step into the field that they were in. I carefully mounted the tallest one with ease since I had done it many times before. I had already gotten my socks muddy since i didn't have any shoes on, i just simply didn't care. I wasn't anywhere near 'ladylike' I was the complete opposite, I was always playing with dirty animals, swimming in random lakes, clothes always dirty from playing to much, I didn't wear any make up, my big curly hair always looked like an elegant lion's mane , I ran around bare foot, I ate a lot, I was athletic, I was tall, and I lived life freely. After I mounted the horse, I tapped it with the side of my foot. The horse ran around the large field at full speed, and I had completely forgotten about what Claudia and her friend were talking about. I was having a blast, the wind pushed my long curls back, the dress was now dirty and had horse hairs all over, and my socks were muddy. As I slowed the horse down, I saw Elvis standing behind the field gate with a smile across his face. I rode the horse towards him before dismounting the horse. I was quick to plead to him, "Elvis I'm so sorry that I ruined my clothes and I should have asked to go on the horse, I'm sorry!" Elvis giggled, "Honey it's alright, I'm really impressed with you"

"What do you mean"

"I ain't never seen a girl as courageous as you, and I definitely ain't seen a girl that knows how to ride a horse like you do, I dont even think I can go that fast"

"Oh thankyou, I wasn't brought up to be a lady haha" I said while itching the back of my head awkwardly. Elvis had an idea, "hey let's go on my motorbike I wanna drive you around" I looked confused before replying, "I know how to ride a motorbike Elvis, I'm not that dumb"

"Oh, well I guess I will give you your own to ride" I jumped up and clapped excitedly.

I sat on the leaver seat of the motor bike, without thinking I sped of without a helmet, I turned around to see Elvis following me with a worried look on his face, he sped up his motorbike to be right next to mine before saying, "Hey ya can't ride without a helmet, you might hurt yourself!"

"Don't be silly Elvis, I don't give a damn about no health and safety!" I said while giggling.

"Ok then honey!"

I wanted to show of to Elvis, I shouted over to him, "Hey Elvis watch this!" Elvis looked confused. I slowly stood up on the motorbike whilst it was going full speed on the private road, when I was fully standing with my bare feet on the leather seat, I began doing cute dance moves to show of even more. I turned to look at Elvis who was in shock, he shouted over to me, "Be careful honey, shit!" I laughed at how worried he was before sitting myself back down. When we got back to Graceland it was the evening and the horses were in their stables. Me and Elvis arrived, I parked the motorbike and turned it off as elvis did the same. Elvis said to me, "Don't ever scare me like that when you stood up on the damn thing" he said whilst giggling. I responded, "Death is scared of me, not the other way round, and I live how I wanna live, I don't care about health and safety" I said whilstI giggled with Elvis. We headed inside Graceland. I went to the bedroom that I now claimed as mine, I quickly stripped of my dirty clothes leaving them on the red carpet. I jumped in the bed and quickly fell asleep.

The next morning I had woken up and Elvis was nowhere to be seen, I had just assumed that he was probably out buying Claudia all of her needs as usual. I was still in nightgown when Claudia suddenly stood in front of me with a wide grin on her face.

"Heyyyy Aria, I want you to come with me on a road trip, just me, you, and Carmella, my best friend." I didn't even have time to respond before she nudged me back into my room, urging me to get dressed. I had picked out some short shorts and a crop top. I put it on and I lastly put on my old cheap shoes. But then fear rushed through my body when I remembered what Claudia and her friend Carmella were talking about yesterday. My only thought was to call Lana. I ran to the telephone whilst I forcefully dialled Lana's number, she didn't pick up, it was sent straight to voice mail. I left a voice mail, "Lana please help me, its a long story but Elvis's girlfriend is gonna kill me, she is planing to take me out on a 'road trip' her freind is coming too, they will kill me I'm telling ya, whenever you get this call Elvis presley, his number is **************, please just hurry I don't have time!" I put the telephone down after I sent the voice mail. I had to compose myself, I wiped my tears and headed downstairs where I was met with Clauidia and Carmella. They both giggled when they saw me in my poor clothes. I couldn't say no to them because they would have just killed me in the house instead of on the 'road trip'.

We where almost there, my heart was pumping like the speed of light, a teardrop fell down my cheek wich Carmella seemed to notice, they both giggled at my powerless self. Suddenly the car came to a stop. The girls both got out before opening the door and dragging me out, pushing me onto the sandy ground, I observed my surroundings. It looked like I was in a dessert but I could still see the large buildings in the distance. I was crying and screaming, the girls just pulled me up off the ground and began to beat me black and blue. I had just accepted that this was the moment that I was going to die, they will either leave me here to die or the will beat me to death. My vision was going blurry, the world around me was spinning, and I could just hear the girls that were towering over my almost lifeless body, they were yelling a bunch of slurs at me, pulling my hair, kicking me, cat fighting. I didn't even realise the blue lights that flashed behind the two girls. The girls suddenly stopped attacking me when a lot of tall men in a blue uniform cuffed them and shoved them in the back of the cars. I could barely make out what was happening, I felt people lift me and put me into a hospital van, the last two faces I saw that day were Lana's and Elvis's infuriated faces.

I woke up in an all white room and I could hear beeping noses all around, I was in so much pain and agony. I got the strength to open my eyes and look at my body, I was in a hospital dress that the patients usually wore, I had a cast on my leg and arm, there was a rather large machine next to me that was taking some blood out of the vein in my arm. I looked up and around the room to see Lana and Elvis looking down at me with tears in their eyes. I instantly began to cry, I quietly said Lana's name, she heard it and leaned over to me to hug me tight, she pulled away and placed a kiss on my swollen cheek whilst pushing my curls away from my face. She began to frantically apologise, "Oh Aria, I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you, I hadn't been with you recently since I had gotten a new job, I'm so sorry, this should have never have happened, just wait till I get my hands on those bitches!" She sobbed as her teardrops fell onto my collar bone. I nodded at her when I realised Elvis was there to, he hugged me tight and did his own little speech as well.

It would be a long time for me to fully heal, but what would happen after is unknown.

To be continued...

#elvis presley #elvis the pelvis #young elvis #fanfic #lana del rey #1960s #decade: 1950s #black reader #mixed girls

[lucius-the-sinful]

🍄Decriscribe your wip/one of your wips in the format of “___ + ___ =___”  

⚠️Which wip your most likely to finish or update next?

🖍Post Any sentence from your wip

❤️Not a question, just a second kudos to send.

🍄: I guess now is a good time as any to reveal I am working on an original novel! It has been years in the making with a lot of me just brainstorming ideas for the world but if I had to narrow it down: grim fantasy + cosmic horror = actually, a story about how love triumphs over everything.

⚠️: Oh man. I always have so many ideas floating around my little brian so I'm always just chipping away at individual projects. The novel mentioned above won't be anywhere near finished anytime soon, not even sure how I would want to go about sharing it either but those are all problems for later (older) me. That thang don't even have a title yet. Ideally I would like to finish the next part to Witcher, Poet, King, my series that follows my witcher OC. Realistically, however, I think the next thing will be "Call in the Wind" a short story about my dunmer OC, Lazarus and his adventure in Skyrim, or the ever-changing fic about my dunmer dragonborn, Helon, which I have titled "Ashblind".

🖍 I also won't let a single sentence limit me. Here is a passage from "Call in the Wind" featuring Lazarus and Kaidan, from the Kaidan follower mod:

After ordering food and reserving a space to sleep, Lazarus continued, in a low voice. "House Hlaalu were seen as traitors after the Oblivion Crisis, Houses Redoran, Telvanni, and Dres blaming them for sending our forces out of Morrowind to support the Empire. They were replaced by House Sadras, my house. Or, at least, it was the one I was born into. The fact these dunmer still recognize House Hlaalu, and regard the empire kindly, is odd to me. Like they are stuck in their own reality."

"Ulfric hasn't shown them much kindness since his rule," Kaidan said. "So I don't blame some of them for becoming hopeful the Empire will throw him out." Drinks were brought to their little table, Kaidan murmuring his thanks to their server. Lazarus sipped on his ale, it was cheap and watered down, but it still warmed him. “What’s in Riften, anyways?” Kaidan asked. “Why there?”

Lazarus hesitated to answer. “I have a living relative there, I’m hoping she can help me find my father,” He looked down into his mug. 

Kaidan waved. “If its too personal, you don’t have to spell it out for me.” 

Lazarus shook his head. “If you’re going to be accompanying me, I might as well. Besides his name, there are only two things I know about him. One, he was of House Hlaalu. Two, by all official records, he died long before I was ever conceived. Since my mother passed away, I made it my mission to find him. Get answers for why he left, who he really is. I don’t even know if the name I have for him is an alias or not.”

#oc: lazarus #my writing #i almost forgot about call in the wind tbh i should really finish it lol #:3c < me plotting again for this

[sexynetra]

*James Joint by Rihanna*

I'm very very anxious by nature, I'm a very anxious person. I'm trying to fix that, I'm trying to alleviate that- I started smoking weed, recently, any- any weedheads in the house? Sort of a, it was a bit of a doomed excursion, since I thought that uh, cool people who smoked weed called themselves weedheads. So uh... off to a pretty rocky start, uh... yeah, yeah! I'm a weed girl, yeah, awesome, okay! So if you're not familiar to taking an edible, it's pretty simple, uh, you ingest the edible, and then you wait anywhere from like an hour and a half to um... THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, for your most toxic memories to just like DROP KICK you in the back of your throat, and send you on like a sweet little roller coaster ride of like your most present anxieties and all the worst things you've ever done to the people who've loved you the most, y'know. I'm like, yeah, yeah! I'm a weed girl, yeah, awesome, okay! So we head to this diner, and I'm like okay yeah, chill, chill, I can do this, I'm a weed girl, and you know what? He's right, he's right! We start to eat, we're joking, it's great, I'm forgetting all about the edible, and then BOOM. It hits me. I am weed girl.

*Smoke Weed Everyday by Snoop Dogg ft. Dr. Dre*

I am so high, as high as maybe the highest I have ever been in my entire life, I am so high, so high, so high, soooooo high.

HOLD UP.

*bong noises* *coughing*

*Smoke Weed Everyday by Snoop Dogg ft. Dr. Dre part 2 electric boogaloo* *musical interlude*

And it's incredible. I love every single thing that I am currently experiencing. I'm eating a plate of french fries right now, they, they taste like rock and roll. They taste like music. And all I want to do is experience more. We get another round of food. We get a third round of food. We're at the jukebox, picking tunes. We get a FOURTH round of food and I have like two milkshakes, one in each hand. We're making jokes with the waitress, she HATES us, y'know it's perfect, it's absolutely perfect. And then, all of a sudden, it hits me, I am in the most excruciating physical pain in my life. And not just like, ohh you smoked a little weed and you got a little sick- NO, like, so deeply ill, and I realize in this moment that I am experiencing cardiac arrest. And- and I asked, is cannabis cardiac arrest?

*Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

I am so high...

*More Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

I- I'm also so sad, because I don't wanna die! You know, and I don't wanna die of weed! I don't- you know- I don't want that for my family, that can't be my legacy!

*Even more Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

I am so high...

*And yet more Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

Suddenly I'm on the ground. I'm just splayed out on the ground, just lying down on the ground, and he's pacing because the optics aren't very good for him, right? Like if the first girl ever to die from weed is just like a black girl at the hands of like, an unemployed white podcaster- it's pretty brutal. That's a really brutal headline.

*What's this? More Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

*BURP SOUND EFFECT*

I let out the biggest burp, I ever burped in my life... um. I had gas. Um... I had gas because I ate like a high person, and uh... he burped me like a baby in the street.

*Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga mixed with burp sound effects*

It hits me. I AM WEED GIRL!

~ @lemyankajuiced (GO WRITE <3)

Weed girl monologue my beloved!!!!!

Anyways here is a sentence for you :)

“Marcia. Uh. Yeah, I’m just meeting my friend here. Is this the right place?” She asked, feeling idiotic the second it came out of her mouth. The girl — Jackie, Marcia reminded herself — just smiled, taking the tray from her.

#asks #lemyankajuiced #weed girl monologue #jax :) #my writing #rawnsyf #running away will never set you free #ask game

[razaks-wheel]

[Velsa thinks Milia was hired by the Arendis family.]

---

Mivynea, Come to my garden as soon as you can. I need to talk to you.

The note was pinned to a post in the Thieves' Den and, to Milia's surprise and worry, was signed with a Daedric vehk.

Why is Vivec using my Thieves Guild alias? she wondered. And why is ze pulling me out of this assignment so suddenly? ...And when did ze get a garden?

But the confusion left just as quickly as it came, as she remembered that her Dunmeri colleague's name also started with a vehk.

So Velsa wanted to see her. Odd. She didn't seem like the type to spend more time with her colleagues than necessary. This must be important.

Milia carefully made her way to the garden, as she was told, hopping down from a neighboring roof. Velsa was nowhere to be seen at first glance, but there was a presence behind her. Her initial brush with death a few years ago had encouraged her to learn how not to get bonked on the head by unseen assailants, and so she sidestepped the blow, grabbing the...Dwemer rod, apparently...and tugging it free of Velsa's hands.

"Strange way to show hospitality to an invited guest," she said. "Aren't you an alchemist? Couldn't you have just offered me poisoned tea?"

"Please, that would have been obvious."

"Unlike your current methods, I suppose?"

Velsa glowered.

"Okay, clearly you see me as some sort of threat," Milia said. "I'm here on your turf, on your terms. Is that not enough? I'll even disarm myself." She tossed her weapons and the Dwemer rod on the ground in front of her. Velsa was more bark than bite. She was fairly confident she could handle herself against her if it came to it.

"You have magic," Velsa said.

"And you have my word that I won't use it against you unless you make me. Now, can you tell me why I'm here?"

Velsa sighed and motioned her to a table.

"Who do you work for, Mivynea?"

"I work for Zeira," she said nonchalantly, taking the seat across from her host.

No suspicion on the concealed identity front, then—or at least the name. That was good.

"Spare me," Velsa snapped. "A mysterious Dunmer with a glass staff and a Morrowind accent shows up, hardly showing her face, whose skills in stealth frankly leave a lot to be desired, and days later someone slips this letter in my pocket, and you expect me to believe you're not sent from House Dres? What do you want? To spy on me? To kill me?"

Milia ignored the barb. Of course her skills in stealth were lacking—that was why Vivec had sent her to train.

"May I see that letter?" she asked.

Velsa handed over the letter slowly, her eyes tracing Milia's every move. Milia tried to ignore the piercing gaze as she scanned the letter. It was a brief well-wish written in Cyrodilic. There was some strange residue on it, but she could ask about that later. She wondered what about it was so frightening to Velsa.

"First of all, Velsa, you're reaching," she said, softening her voice now. "Dres is a mainland house. I have a Western Vvardenfell accent. In fact, I am an upstanding member of House Redoran. I dislike House Dres as much as you seem to think they dislike you."

Velsa kept scanning her face as if searching for the lie, though none was to be found.

"In that case," she said after a long moment, "what brings House Redoran's most average thief all the way to the Guild?"

Milia smiled under her mask. She was starting to see why so many of her colleagues—thieves and Armigers alike—liked when they had a chance to engage in subterfuge. The reveal was exciting.

"Well, I suppose there's no harm in telling you," she said dramatically. "Assuming you can keep a secret, that is."

Velsa rolled her eyes. "I'm not in the habit of gossipping with guildmates."

She leaned in close and whispered, "My patron sent me to train my thieving skills with some of Tamriel's best."

Velsa raised an eyebrow, poorly feigning disinterest. "Your patron?"

Milia inclined her head pointedly toward her glass staff on the ground. "The Thief hirself."

Velsa's eyes widened. "You're a Buoyant Armiger?"

"I am," Milia said. "And in addition to training my skills, I suspect I'm also here to help you deal with this Dres issue. What else can you tell me about it?"

When Velsa had given Milia all the information she needed to pursue the half-naked Nord, Milia picked up her weapons and made to leave. She hopped up on the wall overlooking the garden, then paused and turned partway back to face Velsa.

"Oh, one last thing." She cupped a hand to her masked mouth and loudly whispered, "My name's not really Mivynea."

#milia #eso #thieves guild #velsa

[imtooobsessedrn]

You have asked and I shall deliver- GET WEED GIRLED

*James Joint by Rihanna*

I'm very very anxious by nature, I'm a very anxious person. I'm trying to fix that, I'm trying to alleviate that- I started smoking weed, recently, any- any weedheads in the house? Sort of a, it was a bit of a doomed excursion, since I thought that uh, cool people who smoked weed called themselves weedheads. So uh... off to a pretty rocky start, uh... yeah, yeah! I'm a weed girl, yeah, awesome, okay! So if you're not familiar to taking an edible, it's pretty simple, uh, you ingest the edible, and then you wait anywhere from like an hour and a half to um... THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, for your most toxic memories to just like DROP KICK you in the back of your throat, and send you on like a sweet little roller coaster ride of like your most present anxieties and all the worst things you've ever done to the people who've loved you the most, y'know. I'm like, yeah, yeah! I'm a weed girl, yeah, awesome, okay! So we head to this diner, and I'm like okay yeah, chill, chill, I can do this, I'm a weed girl, and you know what? He's right, he's right! We start to eat, we're joking, it's great, I'm forgetting all about the edible, and then BOOM. It hits me. I am weed girl.

*Smoke Weed Everyday by Snoop Dogg ft. Dr. Dre*

I am so high, as high as maybe the highest I have ever been in my entire life, I am so high, so high, so high, soooooo high.

HOLD UP.

*bong noises* *coughing*

*Smoke Weed Everyday by Snoop Dogg ft. Dr. Dre part 2 electric boogaloo* *musical interlude*

And it's incredible. I love every single thing that I am currently experiencing. I'm eating a plate of french fries right now, they, they taste like rock and roll. They taste like music. And all I want to do is experience more. We get another round of food. We get a third round of food. We're at the jukebox, picking tunes. We get a FOURTH round of food and I have like two milkshakes, one in each hand. We're making jokes with the waitress, she HATES us, y'know it's perfect, it's absolutely perfect. And then, all of a sudden, it hits me, I am in the most excruciating physical pain in my life. And not just like, ohh you smoked a little weed and you got a little sick- NO, like, so deeply ill, and I realize in this moment that I am experiencing cardiac arrest. And- and I asked, is cannabis cardiac arrest?

*Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

I am so high...

*More Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

I- I'm also so sad, because I don't wanna die! You know, and I don't wanna die of weed! I don't- you know- I don't want that for my family, that can't be my legacy!

*Even more Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

I am so high...

*And yet more Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

Suddenly I'm on the ground. I'm just splayed out on the ground, just lying down on the ground, and he's pacing because the optics aren't very good for him, right? Like if the first girl ever to die from weed is just like a black girl at the hands of like, an unemployed white podcaster- it's pretty brutal. That's a really brutal headline.

*What's this? More Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

*BURP SOUND EFFECT*

I let out the biggest burp, I ever burped in my life... um. I had gas. Um... I had gas because I ate like a high person, and uh... he burped me like a baby in the street.

*Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga mixed with burp sound effects*

It hits me. I AM WEED GIRL!

GASPP I’M A VICTIM-

[jinkx-monswoon]

GET WEED GIRLED❗❗❗❗MY FIRST VICTIM IS YOU

*James Joint by Rihanna*

I'm very very anxious by nature, I'm a very anxious person. I'm trying to fix that, I'm trying to alleviate that- I started smoking weed, recently, any- any weedheads in the house? Sort of a, it was a bit of a doomed excursion, since I thought that uh, cool people who smoked weed called themselves weedheads. So uh... off to a pretty rocky start, uh... yeah, yeah! I'm a weed girl, yeah, awesome, okay! So if you're not familiar to taking an edible, it's pretty simple, uh, you ingest the edible, and then you wait anywhere from like an hour and a half to um... THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, for your most toxic memories to just like DROP KICK you in the back of your throat, and send you on like a sweet little roller coaster ride of like your most present anxieties and all the worst things you've ever done to the people who've loved you the most, y'know. I'm like, yeah, yeah! I'm a weed girl, yeah, awesome, okay! So we head to this diner, and I'm like okay yeah, chill, chill, I can do this, I'm a weed girl, and you know what? He's right, he's right! We start to eat, we're joking, it's great, I'm forgetting all about the edible, and then BOOM. It hits me. I am weed girl.

*Smoke Weed Everyday by Snoop Dogg ft. Dr. Dre*

I am so high, as high as maybe the highest I have ever been in my entire life, I am so high, so high, so high, soooooo high.

HOLD UP.

*bong noises* *coughing*

*Smoke Weed Everyday by Snoop Dogg ft. Dr. Dre part 2 electric boogaloo* *musical interlude*

And it's incredible. I love every single thing that I am currently experiencing. I'm eating a plate of french fries right now, they, they taste like rock and roll. They taste like music. And all I want to do is experience more. We get another round of food. We get a third round of food. We're at the jukebox, picking tunes. We get a FOURTH round of food and I have like two milkshakes, one in each hand. We're making jokes with the waitress, she HATES us, y'know it's perfect, it's absolutely perfect. And then, all of a sudden, it hits me, I am in the most excruciating physical pain in my life. And not just like, ohh you smoked a little weed and you got a little sick- NO, like, so deeply ill, and I realize in this moment that I am experiencing cardiac arrest. And- and I asked, is cannabis cardiac arrest?

*Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

I am so high...

*More Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

I- I'm also so sad, because I don't wanna die! You know, and I don't wanna die of weed! I don't- you know- I don't want that for my family, that can't be my legacy!

*Even more Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

I am so high...

*And yet more Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

Suddenly I'm on the ground. I'm just splayed out on the ground, just lying down on the ground, and he's pacing because the optics aren't very good for him, right? Like if the first girl ever to die from weed is just like a black girl at the hands of like, an unemployed white podcaster- it's pretty brutal. That's a really brutal headline.

*What's this? More Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

*BURP SOUND EFFECT*

I let out the biggest burp, I ever burped in my life... um. I had gas. Um... I had gas because I ate like a high person, and uh... he burped me like a baby in the street.

*Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga mixed with burp sound effects*

It hits me. I AM WEED GIRL!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[rgs-savant-praytell-airor]

New high pword.50s

Bring the oil stop the rain.2012 endure.riz.abaddon. 🗡

2 witnesses my sons aka oil/rain

Tupac/biggie, voice of God scrip true anger, the sunlight strength tumors in my mouth speak themselves, even even the phillipino sun strength of my thoughts. The strength of the scitz hospitals all.

Mike burns dream *0cure* ganggrene.cvax.tisheaven.gmg.tispete.gmg.ariel.ariel.ariel...2018

All the blue in heaven/

mikefuture Gmg war. Jesus beer weed gmg. Gmg God video game. Jfk freedom of the press. T.i.s boriqua Moreno blanco reperations. Picture also it all being a dream of a power also form of a beautiful sword by the miracle ontop of miracle b.m.b reparations from blue on high, youth 21 33 aka weed rgs riz 3rd leg all a dream creating a power in the form of a sword.

You know the story I can't die Same problem as john but in the womb, my 1st miracle my head scar, as if I was wounded unto death, o death where art thou sting, ariel ariel ariel, doubled the 3rd time.

Jesus cursing.2021

Tyhomas.youth.333.144gturkbib 1 bill333,1millamerica.noahark.cromagnons.flood.battery

Also bahais 7 guardians think Digimon and the main branch of Islam the eye* allah fbi letter then connect...

Imagine lightning devil scrip plural and the Noah Chem, with Jesus the sun*. No longer bracing for impact but the bootyshot lol.

In the name of jesus.invegabud

Wife.kids.💯 God all smokeobey/bow .3wiwoe.arkc.temple.prayer.worship.spread activation of miracle.

Scitz power law mom

oilrain.ariel.blue. all things are possible with God I am jesus even the locust will obey. Remember mike burns dream formula is weed, also rememb the crime fallen etc etc jesus cursing flood weed=Virginity to the holy jesus power.

Ariel tunatiszealgmg.rev191722 chrisy5cttrump,fbtwtutube

M.o.b war. Trump loves God not money, f u p me f $, I am fb God all tunas obey same. Heaven 25c increase booster 1.50 dollar, it is the moment the holyspirit takes over like an nde or talking in tongues.

Remember the name ariel tunatiszeal.gmg was written on my cell door master of my house riz bring the oil stop the rain abaddon.

America 💥 2012 in the name of jesus be healed mom gw vision.

Command the miracleeeee aLllejuiaaaa

Power words each circling into one another connected by a key of thought when meditating, also good shivs to use in preaching military, just enter the thought and rotate the clot.

And remember all my teachings, etc etc etcs it helps

..

..........

Bring da Oil/stop da rain

Ariel12 ariel21, all this pain is unto me like ariel20/20* tuna

All those who distress ariel

tis zeal

Shall be as a dream 50s power word. Gmg

And the feeble among them shall be as David and David shall be as God as the angel of the lord before them.

2012.

.. .......

With gmg think

1 cash hevcash

2fb cern barbelo

3work beer weed jesus

4videogamedream michael

Then all America's 💥

And strengthen reflect 50s

Trump Don 5cnt

Trump g boat op

Trump richie luck of the irish

Trump dre *thou shalt not kill: law of the cloud, faithful and true hell portal

Jfk Trump 5ct every chrisy gets one based on how they served.

Ariel tunatiszeal.gmg

In righteousness he makes war. That's the name of the desired will for the moment. An open door no man can shut. The cloud.

Oil rain basement

Mike burns dream eating sleeping

Jesus cursing 69

In the name of jesus stepping out the house etc etc

Ariel tuna by the door.

It's so dangerous I rarely come out of my house, de la ghetto. America 💥. Like a mime meheheh.

..... . .....

Here's a tip parfuma

9/11 blue

2012 martial law

Jfk Cia

George washington fbi

Christain rosincrutzs presidents

Black plague 1776

John 13 colonies

Jesus great Britain

Nativity Paul Ireland scitz

King Solomon locking away the knowledge keep the baddies out.

King David our DNA lineage throne.

Egypt joseph phanuel tascia sarah pyramids sentinels.

1g usa space armada

4g God and man mate kicking out the wandering stars

6g cataclysmic jesus take over the solar system and imprison fallen angels for good.

7g o.g. solar system america rebirth

10g 2 witnesses take over 50g solar systems

10-50g 400g solar system take over.

You memo that when enchanting america.

Also before america is 50s power words know to defend your house well.

Example

Gmg bibles cash bug out

Gmg 10 man click ready to go in the crib

Gmg Brooklyn finest type door lock mechanism

Gmg ready for anything by the door cloud.

The rest of the 50s is obvious

Like basement self house destruction and get away bring the oil stop the rain, also know wine the 2 witnesses live riz always birth to passing.

Mike burns dream ready the citizenry rapture mansion

Jesus cursing strapped AK and trap door.

In Jesus name all the women and children praying.

Ariel by the door, airor open robert close.

Perfect immune system defence for meditating your body in a labyrinth of light. Perfect against the scitz. Remember your house is your riz body the metaphor of life. As the scripture states the immortal man while in the flesh always yearns for the heaven life yet stays quiet in himself. Yes we believe in the constitution and at the same time wishing to denounce our worldly ways and pursue religious liberty via a spiritual life. Once again meditate the parfuma and heal your soul.

.... ..

You liked how I stopped the rain in king of NY today mwehehehhe.

New tip, my rotations pretty good and ciggaweed great, but you must visualize

The power of lightning and the flood knowledge in Jesus cursing weather regardless, and the sun as Jesus connected to the lightning, that is Jesus cursing. Etc etc

Then combine that with oil rain amaterasu hell fire, Tumors, adamentium teeth bones, gg.c.v.stomach,3rdlegriz,rgs, I am are the freedom tuna* their of.

Also combine with in the name of jesus and the power of the scitz, and weed mom as law, power of the scitz mom and children, a prayer weed force etc etc

And ariel the gmg war rev 19 glory the name.

Also remember mike burns dream, bacteria dinos the power of blue above the dream of authority, the archangels, enoch he who is like God m.

........

don't forget great Britain jesus my 12 to his 21 and my 21 to his 33 and my 21 to 32* to his 21 to 33. It was the best of times it was the worse of times, where he struggled I excelled vice versa in happiness, we truly bond,also great Britain antichrist john Jesus 600 formula and then king Solomon 666 silver robert and Joseph america pyramid judas riz 2012 bring the oil stop da rain rotation meditation.

[holywaterzzz]

GET WEED GIRLED, WILLARD 💥💥💥💥💥

*James Joint by Rihanna*

I'm very very anxious by nature, I'm a very anxious person. I'm trying to fix that, I'm trying to alleviate that- I started smoking weed, recently, any- any weedheads in the house? Sort of a, it was a bit of a doomed excursion, since I thought that uh, cool people who smoked weed called themselves weedheads. So uh... off to a pretty rocky start, uh... yeah, yeah! I'm a weed girl, yeah, awesome, okay! So if you're not familiar to taking an edible, it's pretty simple, uh, you ingest the edible, and then you wait anywhere from like an hour and a half to um... THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, for your most toxic memories to just like DROP KICK you in the back of your throat, and send you on like a sweet little roller coaster ride of like your most present anxieties and all the worst things you've ever done to the people who've loved you the most, y'know. I'm like, yeah, yeah! I'm a weed girl, yeah, awesome, okay! So we head to this diner, and I'm like okay yeah, chill, chill, I can do this, I'm a weed girl, and you know what? He's right, he's right! We start to eat, we're joking, it's great, I'm forgetting all about the edible, and then BOOM. It hits me. I am weed girl.

*Smoke Weed Everyday by Snoop Dogg ft. Dr. Dre*

I am so high, as high as maybe the highest I have ever been in my entire life, I am so high, so high, so high, soooooo high.

HOLD UP.

*bong noises* *coughing*

*Smoke Weed Everyday by Snoop Dogg ft. Dr. Dre part 2 electric boogaloo* *musical interlude*

And it's incredible. I love every single thing that I am currently experiencing. I'm eating a plate of french fries right now, they, they taste like rock and roll. They taste like music. And all I want to do is experience more. We get another round of food. We get a third round of food. We're at the jukebox, picking tunes. We get a FOURTH round of food and I have like two milkshakes, one in each hand. We're making jokes with the waitress, she HATES us, y'know it's perfect, it's absolutely perfect. And then, all of a sudden, it hits me, I am in the most excruciating physical pain in my life. And not just like, ohh you smoked a little weed and you got a little sick- NO, like, so deeply ill, and I realize in this moment that I am experiencing cardiac arrest. And- and I asked, is cannabis cardiac arrest?

*Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

I am so high...

*More Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

I- I'm also so sad, because I don't wanna die! You know, and I don't wanna die of weed! I don't- you know- I don't want that for my family, that can't be my legacy!

*Even more Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

I am so high...

*And yet more Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

Suddenly I'm on the ground. I'm just splayed out on the ground, just lying down on the ground, and he's pacing because the optics aren't very good for him, right? Like if the first girl ever to die from weed is just like a black girl at the hands of like, an unemployed white podcaster- it's pretty brutal. That's a really brutal headline.

*What's this? More Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga*

*BURP SOUND EFFECT*

I let out the biggest burp, I ever burped in my life... um. I had gas. Um... I had gas because I ate like a high person, and uh... he burped me like a baby in the street.

*Mary Jane Holland by Lady Gaga mixed with burp sound effects*

It hits me. I AM WEED GIRL!

WAH I'VE BEEN WEED GIRL'D

#clown.txt

[babybluebex]

modern!andrea marowski headcanons

a/n ↠ listen i need a soft boyfriend rn so have these (also, i wrote these in the aftermath of getting t-boned by a ford truck so,,, am not lucid)

first things first: he would make you HELLA spotify playlists

some are songs that make him think of you, some are obscure violin pieces bc he is a Prodigy™, and then the lone ABBA song every so often bc duh

(andrea loves ABBA and he is unashamed)

if he took you out to eat, he'd share his milkshake with you

get two straws and share it uwu

he'd also keep an extra jumper in his car bc if you ever get cold anywhere, he wants to be able to give you the warm one off his back and he'll get the spare whenever

yall would steal each other's clothes all the time

you steal his hoodies and jumpers and he'll take your tshirts

he puts the tshirt on his pillow and cuddles it when he's away performing and misses you

whenever you wear one of his hoodies, he'll pull the hood over your head and kiss your nose

he also likes to do that thing where you're laying down and wearing his sweatshirt and he just buries his head under the sweatshirt against your chest

he can and will (and has) fallen asleep like that

his dates always land at either end of a spectrum of Cute: either very thoughtful and carefully planned dinners where he does his hair and buys you flowers, or spur-of-the-moment "get in my car, we're driving out to the country to look at stars"

in the summer, when he brings you flowers, he'll pick them himself

on those car trips, he'd play really nice music like some soft hozier and girl in red, just good music and he'd sing to you and if any song from les mis comes on he'll scream it

les mis is his favorite musical fight me

but he'd bring a big heavy quilt to lay out on the ground and one od those grocery store cakes and yall would lay there and eat cake and point out constellations

sometimes, he'll text you like "put on a nice dress, i'm coming to get you"

and he'll roll up to your house with roses, wearing his tux, and take you to burger king bc that is like the sweetest thing ever to me djfnvow

but yeah we gotta talk about when he goes away

bc i see that he gets really successful from his violin bc in the modern world, there can't be someone as young and talented as him without the media going wild for him

so he'd get offers from different orchestras to perform with them and he literally can't say no

the night before a flight leaves, he'll come to your place and help you make dinner and just spend time with you

hold you and dance with you in the kitchen and kiss your neck

andrea is an awful cook. he puts his heart and soul into it and follows the directions but they're just not quite right

but if you complimented him on it he'd go all pink and just mutter a quiet "thank you"

the only cooking he's REALLY good at is traditional polish food, but he doesnt cook it often bc it makes him miss home a lot

he would call you and text you all the time when he was away and send you selfies

andrea has instagram and stuff but isnt very active, but he uses snapchat all the time bc he likes the little filters

you'd wake up to a bunch of snaps from him like "look at this dog!! :D" or "my friend in the violin section says hi!!"

facetimes when you're getting ready for bed

and you can tell he's sleepy too and his hair is all messy and his eyes are fluttery and you'll be telling a story and look over and see him drifting off and "dre?" and he sorta jolts awake "yeah, i'm here, i'm listening"

he likes being called andy but LOVES being called dre or drea

he'll melt if you call him drea during a tender moment like he has you caged under him on the couch and is tickling your neck with his eyelashes like "drea! i'm gonna cry, stop!" and he just melts into a puddle of love

he gets flustered so easily

hold his hand in public? flustered. praise his sick violin skillz? flustered. ask him to cuddle? flustered.

also, he LOVES orange tic tacs, and his kisses always taste like them

imagine him taking you to the fair

he would put on his little pursed lip concentrated face as he tries to win you a teddy bear and when he finally does it he's damn near about to cry cuz he like "i thought these games were rigged!!"

piggy back rides as hell

you'd introduce him to funnel cakes and its instantly his favorite thing ever

he'd take you on the ferris wheel and put his arm tight around you and let you bury into his neck if you were scared of heights

forehead kisses and soft kisses as hell

waking next to him in DIVINE

he sleeps in boxers and an old t-shirt and he'd pull you close when he wakes up and juts nuzzles his head between your shoulders

he likes to be big spoon and CERTAINLY will not say no to being little spoon

but his hair is all messy and he's bleary eyes and just a huge cuddle bug and will whine and whimper just awful when you try to get out of bed

"five more minutes, kochanie?"

"you said that five minutes ago, dre! i have to get ready for work"

and he pouts but kisses the back of your neck and lets you go

as you shower he makes you coffee (or tea) so that's hot and ready when you're done with your shower

and he'll kiss you as a secondary greeting and he's just

i just think that modern!andrea marowski 💕💕💕💕💕

#andrea marowski #andrea marowski x reader #andrea marowski fanfiction #andrea marowski fluff #andrea marowski x reader fluff #daniel bruhl #daniel bruhl x reader #daniel bruhl fluff #daniel bruhl x reader fluff #daniel brühl #daniel brühl fanfiction #daniel brühl x reader #daniel brühl fluff #daniel brühl x reader fluff #ladies in lavender

[kiloxy]

Analysis: WHY DREAM IS ACTUALLY BLONDE GEORGE!

NOW DON’T SCROLL AWAY JUST YET!

Listen Guys I have come up with the greatest theory/analysis of my life. Twitter could NEVER. This is about to solidify me as one of the lead big brain theorists on tumblr, cross my heart..... *cough* shit-poster *cough* I mean what? anyway... This analysis includes lots of receipts! Now let’s begin me launching my 1000000000 IQ career faster than Dream can MLG water out of this damning post. 

Tw: Close up of eyes since I zoomed in images of their eyes as proof. It will be under the cut.

So let me start with the question everyone has asked: WHO IS DREAM?!?

He’s the mysterious lime green, tea kettle sounding, god level skill, 10000 IQ, pissbaby enigma that took the internet BY STORM. He has grown so fast and so quick it’s insane, big brain plays must be through the roof. We could wonder how he did this... Why he did this.... But really. All we should care about is WHO THE FUCK IS HE?!!?!

Excuse my language... But anyway.. I have been working DAY AND NIGHT. To figure this out for you guys. It’s been 78 hours of no sleep. After escaping Dream’s basement (smart ass found out I was going to expose him) I have finally made it to a computer to post this...   

Dream is Blonde George

Okay wait wait wait! Before you go leave, screaming and appalled, slamming the button to unfollow my broke ass, hear me out. 

First point... What the fuck is blonde George?

THIS MAN. REMEMBER HE BLEW UP?!?! WHY DID HE? WHY??? I mean we hate him! Well the only reasonable explanation is that he was a PLANT!

Yes that’s right, blonde George was a plant. This is actually Dream. Now Dream loves chaos, he’s even mentioned before he may make a stan account/pose as a cosplayer and I think this was his way...He leaked this photo of him on twitter to fuck with us. To test the waters before the Mr.Beast video where he might reveal himself as blonde George. 

Only Dream and his 1000000 IQ could blow up a post like this guys, think about it! 

OKAY TIME FOR THE REAL PROOF:

We know Dream’s hair color okay, look at this twitter post where he does a hair color reveal:

POST HERE

Now let’s take a closer look. Here’s Dream’s hair:

Rest of the analysis under the cut includes more analyzed images, links, and video as proof:

Now I took to an eyedropper and examined Blonde George’s hair and got:

LOOK HOW CLOSE THE NUMBERS ARE!  AND WE KNOW NUMBERS DON’T LIE! The more samples I took of blonde George’s hair and compared to Dream’s the clearer it became... Their hair... Is the same! 

Now that we have the hair matching what else can we figure out? I mean Dream said he had green eyes, we even have a pic here of them. 

But I ask you.... Dream’s smart. You really think he’s telling the truth? I mean think of the the vlog incident. Man is a liar. 

I introduce to you a concept: CONTACTS

You see Dream knew that blonde George would get a lot of traction (he wanted it to). But he didn’t want to be outed too fast. I mean blonde white dude? blowing up on twitter? Obviously traceable back to Dream. So change one of his most distinct features, his eyes! He is wearing brown contacts. I have proof, let’s look at blonde Gog again. uSING MY EXPENSIVE HIGH TECH EQUIPMENT I-

ENHANCE ENHANCE ENHANCE!

I mean first just looking at this you can see the odd white glare on his eye... Now that is not your usual eye glare, no... That’s an eye glare that shows what it looks like when light reflects off a contact lens. He is wearing contacts! 

But if that isn’t enough for you I cleaned up the photo of blonde George’s eye using mad skillz I learned from crime shows and got:

YEAH THAT’S RIGHT! CLEARLY A CONTACT LENS AND A CHEAP ONE TOO! LOOK HOW ARTIFICIAL IT IS IN THIS CLEAR ZOOMED IN PICTURE OF BLONDE GEORGE’S EYE THAT IS OBVIOUSLY NOT A PHOTO OF A RANDOM WOMAN I FOUND WITH A CONTACT. 

Dream put in brown contacts! Why else would this “blonde George” be wearing contacts huh??? We know real George has 100% real gorgeous brown eyes. 

Now you may be saying, well that’s just an edited photo of legit George. We have the real photo of George.  But no, it’s not! THAT’S WHAT DREAM WANTS YOU TO THINK SHEEPLE, WAKE UP!

Dream put on a red hoodie, styled his hair to look like George, and he posed just right so it looks like it’s an edited version of that photo of Gog. But it’s not! We can tell by the contacts! Also George would never exude the off vibes blonde George does. It doesn’t pass the vibe check. 

Now while there are so many other bits of proof... This is getting long and I want to wrap it up. So here’s one last big bit of proof. 

THIS VIDEO OF THE SCUFFED PODCAST AT 15:37

They talk about blonde George and, George claims it is photoshopped but he smiles nervously. And as he pulls up blonde George Dream does his nervous laugh. Why is he nervous? Why would he be nervous?? about this “meme”. Maybe because he’s scared to be found out,

Now the most important part:

“I don’t rlly like it tbh.”- Gog.

“Uhhh I don’t like it.”-Dream.

Now you may have brushed past this upon viewing, but.... Nobody asked for Dream’s opinion. This was supposed to be about GEORGE why would Dream input his opinion and speak like it’s about him... BECAUSE IT IS HIM

Now the most damning of all... 16:50 same video.

“Dream have you like ever done a face reveal or no?”-??

Dream HESITATES 

“No- I haven’t yet. I do plan on doing one but I haven’t yet.”

As he speaks his words get more rushed and quiet, he’s lying. He’s nervous.

Then George saving him, redirects the topic completely off blonde George and Dream immediately jumps on the new topic eager to switch focus. It’s so weird how fast they move the topic, the clearly don’t want to talk about it. George is a good friend, he knew that Dream was scared and needed an out of the conversation before he outed himself as blonde George. 

But... they couldn’t keep the ruse up.... BECAUSE I AM HERE! 

I see you Dream and your 10000000 IQ. HE THOUGHT HE COULD CONTAIN ME, CONTAIN THE TRUTH. BUT I- BREAKING GENESIS CAN NOT BE STOPPED. I ESCAPED HIS BASEMENT JUST FOR THIS FUCKING POST! IT WAS MANHUNT, I SPEEDRAN THIS SHIT. I BET HE’S LOOKING FOR ME NOW.

*cough* Anyway, now my very very last point. 

Why haven’t we ever seen Dream and Blonde George in a room together huh? It’s weird right?? They can’t coexist separately because THEY ARE THE SAME PERSON. IT’S SO OBVIOUS! 

If this grade A++++, wagyu quality, meaty with receipts analysis wasn’t enough to convince you then.... I am going to hack into Mr.Beast’s content. I am on my way to his house as I type this... Next post I am LEAKING images from the shoot when Dream drops the sign that will SHOW that he is in fact Blonde George. 

If you have more proof.... Anything to add... react... or respond to this analysis. My inbox is open.

Wish me luck, I honed my hacker skillz just for this. You may not be able to trust Dream, but you can trust me! Hopefully I can do this before Dre catches me again. 

o7 bois 

#shitpost #i mean #analysis #dreamwastaken #georgenotfound #blonde george #this is the real shit #I legit spent so long on this kill me #please don't unfollow #this analysis slaps #This is my best work #Dream

[ellavaday]

Pupi Poisson interview

📸 by mista

To the list of translated stuff from the DRES girls we have the guest segment in the sewing show, hugaceo's interview, supremme's and now pupi's (same book supremme's comes from it's an interview by valeria vega in the book Travesti by mista studio)

What are the fundamental qualities that a good drag queen must have?

The most important quality of a drag queen is to never stay still [/ never not know what to do]. You can go on a show and try to do a song and maybe the song won't play hard enough [for you to hear/do your number] or it might be the wrong track, maybe you don't know the song at all but you can't do nothing. And when the song is over you have to know how to take advantage of what's around you. Always bring something to the table, as an indulgence. If you don't know how to improvise, no matter how skinny and well dressed you are, you won't get the audience to remember you.

You're comedy queen status caracterizes you. Who have been your referents in that respect?

I started in the theatre, alongside many actors and actresses from Madrid. On the comedy side I loved Martes y 13, so I may have many things in common with them. I also like Lina Morgan a lot, both her shows and her movies. You go around picking a little bit of everything and I am very into absurdist humor. I also loved Ángel Garó, when he played Juan de la Cosa in Un, Dos, Tres. I also come from Los Morancos and the humor of the 80s and 90s I grew on. That's all I have sucked in... Besides all the other kind of sucking I've done! [/j]

What has changed from the Pupi of the beginning of her career till now?

Her perspective and position. In the beginning you're crazier, without knowing what you're doing or where are you going so you can do whatever you want however you want. I did not know how to do my makeup, although maybe there's people that would say I still don't know how to do that, but well girl, I don't tell you how to do things in your own house. Now I'm aware that I have a trayectory, built little by little in venues all over Spain. I know I've been part of the night of many people and being part of the tv show suddenly makes you more important, but I don't believe I did anything different on the show nor more wonderful. I did what I've always done, what they've let me do and what they've wanted to share but it's true that being on the show establishes you [lit. It'd be anoint you but that makes little sense in English] but what got me to where I am is the work I've been doing for years.

You have more nights under your belt than a trash truck, I hope you'll be able to tell me what is the hardest audience to win over

The one that is waiting to say "what a load of crap" from the beginning, bitter people of which there's many and you can find it as well during the day, on the bank or the supermarket. People that think everything is inconvenient, a problem or a burden. That's a very complicated audience to face because they only see the negative.

This profession is tremendously linked to vocation, when did the passion for drag come to you?

As I said, I came from the theatre. And since I was a kid I liked to watch a lot of series and I'd play pretend with my toys, I also made puppets. Everything focused on acting, but I started on hen/stag parties, in which I'd play a character, for example a mean or gay waiter and while they had dinner I'd play impromptu prank on them. Drag performers started to come to those parties and I realized it was the same, a performance in which the magic of a pop star (or whatever vibe you want to give it, maybe Mariah Carey, Whitney Houston or Kylie Minogue) is added. I thought it was the best because I could perform and on top of that I could be a stunning woman, that's where my interest started, so I could imitate my favorite singers and being able to put myself on their shoes. Plus I could combine it with music which is something I love and I'm now releasing my own songs.

Is Pupi then a drag performer whose dreams came true?

I think so. I think Pupi has made many of her dreams come true or more accurately, thanks to Pupi, Alberto has made many of his dreams come true, like releasing songs and making music for example which is something I've always wanted to do and thanks to having a persona I've been able to break away from certain shyness and reach that facet of myself. I'd like to do cinema, but maybe not as Pupi, but as a dramatic actor. I wouldn't like to be always a comedic character or to be always Pupi. But not because I'd like to retire her, I'd like to alternate between her and other roles but we live in a country whose situation makes it difficult and you get typecast. Look at Paco Leon, who is forever Luisma and people always want to see him like that and it's what they ask for, that comedic character, and they don't risk seeing him show a different register. I'd like to be able to make the change and that Alberto got to be more than just Pupi.

What advice do you remember being given and what advice would you give to new sisters?

I don't remember being given one in particular but I do want to mention auntie Andonequi, which was one of the few left of the old school, she would play Isabel Pantoja or Rocío Jurado, and who was one of the people that helped memost and died a couple of years ago. What I always noticed from her is that she'd never judge you, while now many coworkers like to judge the others, for everything, because they are pretty, ugly, fat, because they aren't wearing the best clothes or don't know how to give a live show and it's created this environment I'm which some of the pretty ones want to make the others feel ugly because deep down they lack confidence and are afraid that the other ones will take their jobs from them. Andonegui was the complete opposite, she'd always listen and support you. She could see in you the potential to be an entertainer. You don't need to be the prettiest, the best dressed or the tallest, all you need is to keep the audience entertained so to the new ones I say don't listen to the other ones, that only thing they'll tell you is that you can't do it.

Tell us of an unforgettable night...

I've been acting for fourteen, almost fifteen years so talking about only one night is very hard, girl you're making this difficult! [/lh] but look there was this one time in Valencia some guys organized a pride event with a company and made a giant party that reunited a bunch of artists, there was Roser from the Pop Stars, Natalia from OT, Satin Greco, Chumina Power, Melody, Lara Sojén, [local] girls from Valencia and I'm sure I'm forgetting many more. Oh! Sofia Cristo was also there. Well, as I was saying, sharing that night with all of those people was wonderful, I had lots of fun. I was the hostess of the event and it was a night surrounded by people I admire but all of us were equals. That was unforgettable.

And a night you'd like to forget?

There's been times I've gotten myself in trouble or I've gotten myself in events that made me say "Good lord, why did I come here". There's this one in Torrevieja, in a venue owned by a guy that was in Big Brother in which everything was so seedy, there were very few people and then they took me to a hostel where a dude sleeping in a mattress got up to open the door for me and yeah there's been more than a few nights in which I've end up in sordid places and with bad company. There was another night in Seville in which i forgot to pack a wig so I had to paint my entire head black and draw on some curls with glitter ala Liza Minnelli. People were giving me resting murder face because they couldn't understand why wasn't I wearing a wig and there was a truly weird atmosphere but in the end those nights become anecdotes and you can always integrate them on a show so I'd rather not forget any.

After your tv appearance, what is the audience that surprised you the most?

It's hard to surprise me but I see many children and many older ladies. There's women in their 50s that go to the shows and they tell you that you've opened their eyes to a whole new world, to other possibilities. Maybe they liked Raphael and female popular folk singers but have now discovered other things that they think are fun and beautiful. Even if there's people now that say that drag is a way to denigrate women, I don't know where they get that, because it all comes from gay men admiring women and wanting to imitate singers or actresses. Definitely children and older ladies is the one that has surprised me most. Even if there's a small percentage of those heterosexual husbands of the girls that come along and suddenly they are enjoying more than their women and they know how to give you a compliment without that morbid ghoulishness of years before that has disappeared, there's a respect and admiration from them.

note: there was a rape joke in one of the answers i took the administrative decision to not translate bc it's tasteless no matter the language but it did feel unfair to not say it was there to begin with to people reading this.

#sandra's translator era #this is a tag now #i get the feeling she's been treated v poorly before idk it's a vibe i get and it breaks my heart a bit #not by the fandom specifically but by life #it's the older gay sadness idk how to explain it #pupi poisson #rpdr spain #drag race espana #drag race españa

[keanan1501]

Notable swaps: Dream & Tubbo, Fundy & Ranboo, DreamXD & Micheal

TRIGGER WARNINGS: mentioned child death, attempted child murder, intrusive thoughts

Short synopsis: Tubbo escapes prison and heads to Logsteadshire to deal with Dream once and for all, instead he finds something intresting in Logsteadshire... or should i say someone? Tubbo swings his sword in a lazy arch, a pleased grin on his face as the sword's enchantments hum under his hand "This is perfect" he breathes, turning to face his three companions with a bright smile "You three did wonderfully! Sam, consider your debt repayed" The creeper hybrid huffs, eyeing Tubbo as if the younger male was nothing but dirt beneath his shoes "Whatever, just don't expect me to come running when that cranky hog starts chasing" Tubbo giggles, grabbing Sam's arm and pulling him down, allowing Tubbo to pet Sam like one would pet a dog, the ram hybrid is blissfully ignorant of the creeper hissing in protest "Awe, Sam~ It almost sounds like you care for me~" he coos, and his bright smile transforms into something more sinister "Let Techno come, i escaped his 'unescapeable' prison after all. There's nothing that stupid pig can do that i can't counter"

Sam nods, a short and tight one, before he turns around and takes a few steps away from the group "Also, Tubbo. Keep away from Fundy, or else" Tubbo blinks, tilting his head slightly as Sam walks off, he'd known Fundy had moved in with Sam and Ponk shortly after L'manburg exploded, but for someone like Sam, who had rumors surrounding him about his heartlessness, warming up to the cheeky fox hybrid? That was something he didn't expect, he could feel excitement bubbling inside of him, Fundy was his little spy, and Sam and Ponk were both very powerful people, if his motto wasn't "the higher the risk the better the reward" he would have felt fear, unfortunately for Sam and Ponk, he only sees this as a challenge.

"Tubbo, everything alright?" right, he isn't alone. "I'm fine, just scheming" Tubbo shrugs Purpled's concern off, and smiles at Tommy, who is looking at him like he hung the moon and stars just for the blond, maybe he had, the white streak in Tommy's hair certainly proved he had. A small chuckle escapes his lips as he thought back to his now dead ally, Quackity, the duck hybrid had given him the revive book, allowing him to bring his two favorite toys back to life after their deaths, both now sporting a white streak amongst their usual brown and blond hair, proudly showing off the fact that they belong to him, that they're his toys, and noone else could ever hope to claim them.

Sure, Wilbur would have protested with every inch of his being if he could hear Tubbo now, but Tommy had accepted it, embraced it even, all he has to do is give Wilbur a nudge in the right direction, and his favorite toy will fall back into place, just like he'd done during exile. And Tubbo knows exactly how to give said first nudge, who better to target than Wilbur's best friend, his emotional support, his other half, his Dream?

Tubbo digs inside of his pocket, taking out a slightly dented but otherwise beautiful and functioning compass, the words "your Wilbur" carved into it with so much care, Tubbo could insult Phantommy in a lot of different ways, but he can't help but compliment the late ghost's designing skills and steady hands. Phantommy had given the compass to Dream, giving a similar one to Wilbur, except Wilbur's was labled with "your Dream" during exile, Tubbo wanted to tear Phantommy a new one right then and there, but he knew better. Phantommy wasn't Tommy, of course the silly ghost would think Wilbur belonged to Dream, he simply made a mistake, Wilbur belonged to Tubbo, not to Dream! So when Dream, Schlatt and Ranboo were attacked by a horde of creepers Tubbo swooped in and stole the compass, giving it to its rightful owner.

"I'm going to give a short visit to everyone's least favorite president" Tubbo announces, clicking the compass shut and stuffing it back into his pocket "Tommy, i trust you can distract Wilbur and Fundy long enough for me to have a pleasant chat with Dream?" the blond nods quickly, and Tubbo affectionately rolls his eyes, Tommy knows his place as Tubbo's toy, but even Tubbo is sometimes suprised by how much Tommy wants to please his "hero". The poor boy hadn't learned a thing in Pogtopia, had he? As soon as someone more powerful comes along Tubbo would drop Tommy like a stone, but until then Tubbo could enjoy soaking in the pure wonder and awe Tommy has for him.

The blond scurries off, and Tubbo turns to Purpled, smirks and winks, which causes the purple-hoodied male to grumble in either disgust or adoration, Tubbo liked to believe it is the latter "Don't forget i left Ranboo at the alter for you!" Tubbo shouts teasingly as he runs off, laughing as he could hear Purpled make fake gagging noises, definitely disgust.

The trek from the prison to Dream's new village... what was it called again? Logsteadshire or something? wasn't long, and Tubbo cringed as the buildings came into view. Sure, the odd mish-mash of dirt, stone, wood and diamond were passable as houses, but Dream never did have the best eye for design. Tubbo was glad Dream let Schlatt, Ranboo, Fundy, Ponk and Techno do most of the rebuilding for L'manburg, Blood God knows what Tubbo would have done if that stupid country was filled with Dream's odd shacks.

He wasn't here to bash on Dream, he was here to get his armor and weapons back, most notablely his sword "Wasp's Stinger" otherwise known as one of, if not the, most powerful weapon in his land. The dry sand crunches under his feet as he walks confidently across the sand, he could see Eret's kid, Junior, peeking out of one of the holes in the second biggest dirt shack, which must mean that Dream lives in the biggest shack.

Tubbo throws the door open with reckless abandon, walking in to the space like one would walk into their own house, he knows Dream isn't home yet, a good predator waits for their prey after all. He plops down on the couch, his ram ears perking up as the couch lets out a creaking noise, he can't help but wonder if the couch is older than him.

Then he freezes as hurried footsteps thunder down the stairs. Had he been wrong? Is Dream home? Is someone else here to housesit?

"Daddy! Daddy! Look!" Tubbo relaxes as a young ocelot hybrid comes around the corner, the kid couldn't be older then three, which means there is no threat. The kid is beaming, eyes screwed shut and a large droopy smile on their face as the kid proudly holds up a drawing containing four stick figures.

"I'm not your dad, kid" Tubbo chuckles "Sorry to disappoint you" the kid gasps and their round big cat ears pin back, their green eyes wide with both curiosity and fear. Tubbo blinks, and suddenly the ocelot hybrid is gone, and in their place is a ziglin, looking at him like Tubbo was the savior of the world, back then it had felt nice to have someone depend on him, now? It fills his chest with a burning emotion he can't quite place, a mix between grief, anger, confusion and betrayal. Michael can't look at him anymore, so why is he still looking at Micheal?

"Come sit kid, i won't hurt you" Tubbo pats the seat next to him, kids tended to overshare, he was going to use the kid to get some info on Dream, that was all, he wasn't being nice because the kid reminds him of Micheal, he's just being tactical. The kid slowly shuffles over, clutching the drawing like a lifeline, once the kid decides they're close enough he stops, and Tubbo leans forewards to inspect the drawing.

For a three year old he had to give the kid props, the lines looked good and he could make out who was who. Dream and Fundy are standing close together, the kid inbetween them, Wilbur is off to the side, but just like the three in the foreground the kid had drawn him with the biggest smile.

"Who did you draw?" Tubbo asks, looking at the kid with a genuinely curious expression, the kid glows at the question, and points to each stick figure in turn "That's my papa Dre! That's my daddy Funwy! And un'le Wilby! And me!" Tubbo nods, a small smile on his face, so what if the kid reminds him of Michael, noone would get hurt if he entertains the kid for a bit, right?

"Owl?" the kid asks, poking Tubbo in the leg and Tubbo chuckles "I'm not a owl, i'm a ram" he helpfully informs the kid, who pouts in response "Owl?" the kid asks again "You want to go see Wilbur?" Tubbo asks back, knowing Wilbur's wings were often compared to those of a owl, but the kid shakes their head, grabs a book, and flips through the pages. The kid holds up the book and presses it against Tubbo's face "Owl?" Tubbo backs away a bit so he can read the words on the page, it's a classic toddlers book, going over different animal sounds, and a lightbulb turns on in Tubbo's head "Are you asking me who i am?"

The kid nods, gleeful that Tubbo finally understands "I'm Tubbo, can you try saying my name?" Tubbo crouches next to the kid, gently grabbing the kid's hand and writes each letter of his name on the kid's palm, as the kid reads them out loud "T-u-b-b-o" a second of silence "T'bbi!" the kid cries victoriously, and Tubbo just puts his arms up in celebration with the kid, not having the heart to correct them.

"T'bbi, out?" the kid asks, looking at him with the biggest puppy eyes Tubbo's ever seen, how does this kid know his one weakness? Tubbo signs but smiles, opening the door, the kid rushes out and throws themself into the sand, letting out a screech of excitement "Daddy and papa do not let me out!" the kid babbles, making sand hills with such vigor that Tubbo can't help but admire the kid.

Would Micheal be like that if he'd hadn't...? His hand twitches. It was Dream's fault. The handle of his sword felt cold against his hand. He could get revenge. He takes a step forewards, his sword hanging limply by his side, when did he take it out of the scabbard? He could make Dream feel the same pain, the same dark spiral that he went through. His eyes flicker across the kid's body, quickly finding every weak point that would ensure a quick and painless death. He wasn't heartless, he wouldn't let the kid suffer. He puts his hand on the kid's cheek, the kid leans in to the touch, leaving their neck vulnerable. He wasn't a monster like Dream, he wouldn't leave the kid to bleed out, scared and alone.

He snaps from his thoughts as he feels  something rumble beneath his hand, his ears face towards the kid, flicking whenever he could pick up on the faint sound of purring. Tubbo quickly sheaths his sword, noone deserves to go through the loss of a child, not even his greatest enemy. He lets out a sigh and pats the kid on the head, the kid purring even louder.

His ears flick backwards, and he realizes someone is approaching, probably either Fundy or Dream, and as much as he wanted to stick around and taunt the two, the ocelot kid was too young to get wrapped up in their silly game of chess. "Hey kid? I have to go" the kid whines as Tubbo pulls his hand back, short stubby arms reach out to his hand, trying to grab hold of it, but Tubbo is faster, he jumps up and silently runs to the other side of house that the approaching person is coming from. He could hear the kid yell "Daddy!" loudly, the kid's feet kick up sand as they run towards Fundy, the fox hybrid's orange hair standing out against the pale sand "XD?!" Fundy asks, worry coating his tone like Tubbo coats things he likes with honey "How did you get outside?! Is Dream here?!"

"T'bbi!" the kid answers simply, and Tubbo could almost see the fear rolling off of Fundy in waves "Y-you aren't try-ing to say Tubbo, are you?" the kid doesn't answer verbally, but from Fundy's sharp intake of breath he could tell the kid confirmed Fundy's words.

"Tubbo?! I know you're here! I'm calling Techno!" Fundy barks, and Tubbo peeks around the corner to see Fundy typing something on his communicator. With a ease that clearly shows he's done this many times before Tubbo pulls out a bow & arrow and shoots, the arrow goes straight through Fundy's communicator, breaking it, leaving Fundy with no way to call for help, and judging by Fundy's startled yip, the fox knows it. Tubbo steps out in the open, and the kid reaches towards him with a delighted cry "T'bbi!" Fundy grabs the kid's arm and pulls them close, baring his teeth at Tubbo. The ram hybrid just smiles and walks towards them, hand already on his most dangerous weapon of all, eyes unmoving from Fundy's stone-still form. Tubbo whips out his most dangerous weapon and fires, Fundy letting out a screech as he's assaulted by twin streams of thick honey. Tubbo knew repurposing those water guns into honey guns was  a genius idea, he can't believe Sam doubted him.

"What?! Why?!" Fundy groans, trying to brush the sticky liquid out of his coat, but only succeeding in smearing it out more "Because, you and me, we're friends Fundy, best friends even!" Tubbo replies, walking past Fundy like he didn't just doom the poor fox to being a bee attraction for the next week "We're not friends!" Fundy snaps back, and Tubbo turns to face him, blue-green eyes almost seeming to glow in the light of dusk

"If we weren't friends, why would you help me so much? Blowing up the community house, spying on important events, guarding Wilbur's music disc, setting off the TNT trapping Wilbur in prison. All of those things are things that you did, things i asked you to do"

#dream smp au #dream smp #dsmp au #tubbo #fundy #dreamxd #swap au