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introvertedbookwormsstuff · 4 years

Text

Part Of the Family

Characters: Dean x half Sister, Sam x half Sister

Warnings: Angst, Fluff , strong language

Ages

Dean- 20

Sam- 16

Y/N- 12

My entry into this world wasn’t considered to be a phenomena which was adored by all. On the contrary, I believe it was frowned upon extensively by all the family members. I was the youngest Winchester in the family. Daughter of John Winchester and Sarah Daniels, not Mary Winchester. Hence this why I believe both Sam and Dean didn’t care for me like they did for each other. Don’t get me wrong, they never went out of their way to hurt me or bully me but for them I was just a non existent entity which sat in the backseat of the car.

As a child I was jealous of the bond the two of them shared, though they had enough troubles which would last them a lifetime at least they had each other. As a spectator I considered it a privilege to watch their bond grow into this wonderful relationship. A relationship of brothers, best friends and confidants. The troubles they faced they shared with each other, they were willing to lend each other their shoulder to cry on and carry the weight of the world. As a spectator I could write a book about their relationship but as a sister or half sister I was filled with a peculiar kind of jealousy, I didn’t want them to break their bond I just wanted them to add me in their group. I just wanted to be a part of the family.

Sam and I entered the motel room after a long day of school. We dropped our backpacks on the ground and relished in the coolness. Dean walked in that very moment and smirked at our dehydrated condition.

“You guys need to bathe. You are stinking up the place!”

Sam looked up at Dean with his perpetual bitch face. “Well you could have been a decent brother and come pick up us in your fancy car.”

Dean shook his head and said. “No can do brother. You need to learn that life is hard and I won’t always come to your rescue. Also I need my beauty sleep man or how else am I gonna woe the ladies?” Sam rolled his eyes at his big brother and laid his head back against the sofa. I just sat there watching my brothers bicker back and forth. It was quite amusing.

Dean suddenly turned towards me and and in a monotonous tone spoke to me.”Y/N, Dad has told me to tell you that you need to do research for the next hunt. We have no idea what it is and Sam can’t do it because he has a test.”

I looked at him and sighed heavily. “Dean I actually kind of have a test too, Can Sam and I both do it? It will be faster and better.”

Sam just looked at me in an irritated fashion from the corner of his eye and suddenly got up to go to the bathroom. He shut the door with a loud bang.

Dean just got up from his chair and stood over me.

“Y/n, for the love of god. Can you please start pulling your weight around here. We don’t ask much of you. This test is really important for Sam and he hasn’t been sleeping well since the last hunt. You can at least do this much.”

Saying this Dean walked away from me. I sat alone in the room while the tears pricked my eyes and fell on my cheeks. I myself had gotten hurt on my shoulder from the last hunt and since we were low on money I had not been taking anything. It wasn’t fair. I just rubbed the tear stains from my eyes and picked up my backpack to go to the library to do research.

Dean’s POV

I sat in the motel room cleaning the guns. I glanced at the clock and realized that it was almost 9 and Y/N still had not returned. I looked at Sam who had fallen asleep while reading his book. I was still contemplating whether I should go to the library and check up on Y/n when I heard a knock at the door. I opened it to find my sister carrying a bunch of books in her hand.

“It’s a werewolf.” She announced as she entered the room. She dropped all her stuff on the table and went straight to the bathroom. The sound woke up Sam who was now rubbing his eyes.

“What’s with all the ruckus man?” He asked

I looked at him and replied. “Y/n just came back, she said its a werewolf.”

“Well can’t she keep it down, Dad is also sleeping here. Seriously man she has never cared for anybody.” He grumbled.

“I hear ya brother, We will go tonight to hunt this son of a bitch. I want it dead as as soon as possible.”

At that very moment Y/n came out of the washroom with a towel in her hand. Her movements looked tired and her eyes were bloodshot.

“Y/n pack the bags, we will be going tonight for the hunt.” I told her nonchalantly.

She frowned and sadly looked at me. I kept her notes on the table and put my hands on my waist. “What you don’t want to go tonight for the hunt ? Causing you severe inconvenience is it ?”

She closed her eyes and said”I never said that, I just...Can you please pack the bags I am really tired and I really need to sleep.”

Sam scoffed from the sofa.”Y/n, you literally just went to the library and came back. Why are you even tired?”

“Because I was working my ass of unlike you. You were in fucking dreamland snoring away to glory.”

Sam got up and suddenly grabbed her hand. “You will not talk to me like that! Do you understand me?!?!”

I put a hand on Sam’s shoulder.” Sam calm down and let her go. She is just a little girl.”

“I am also your sister.” Y/n said in a timid and and broken voice and I swear my heart split right into two but before I could say anything Sam’s voice boomed loudly. “No sweetheart, get this misunderstanding out of your head. You are not our sister. You are our charity case. You are not our mother’s daughter.”

I grabbed Sam by the shoulder and pulled him away from Y/n. “What the Hell Sam?!?” I yelled at him.

“Oh come on Dean, you yourself said that she never was and never will be our sister. I am tired of her. She doesn’t belong here. You said so yourself.” I took a deep breath and told Sam to go inside. I looked back at Y/n and saw that tears were making their way down her cheek.

“Listen, Y/n I am sorry you had to hear that. I don’t know what is wrong with him? I think he is just stressed.

“Dean did you really say all that about me?”

I sighed and looked at her. “Listen, I don’t want to lie to you. I might have said that, but it was a long time ago.”

“Do you really not consider me your sister?”

“It’s not like that Y/n. It is different with you. I am really sorry that I hurt you. Saying this I walked back into the bedroom.

Y/n’s POV

I stood their in the room and clutched my locket tightly in my hand. Why on earth did were they so mean to me? Why did they not love me? Was blood really that important to them? I tried to wipe my tears but to no avail they just kept descending down my cheeks. I fell down on the floor and cried as much as I could. I grieved for the love I was never given in this household. I grieved for the family I was never a part of.

End of Part 1

To be continued.

Tags-

@mersuperwholocked-lowlife @dreamin-of-somewhere-else @winchesters-favorite-girl @bellero @spnsisimagines @supernatural-jackles @luci-in-trenchcoats181 notes @u-snavi @spnsisimagines @bellero @simply-wins-little-sis @simsguruforever2580 @lizwinchester16 @all-of-the-fandom-trash @wtfcas @legitgirl15 @interwebslandfill @lovesamwinchester @mariahoedt @exo-chenyeol-61 @i-mysteryspot @ap-001 @snanlawala1 @captonite @falloutofmymemez @bria133 @mashed-fandom-imagines @negan–is–god @lovexxxkittyxxxblog @lupine-princess

#dean x sister reader #winchester sister #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural #sam x sister!reader #sister winchester #spn #spn fanfiction #fanfic

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supernaturallyobsessedchic · 4 years

Text

When He’s Sick

Pairing: Dean x reader

Warnings: sick!dean (it’s a thing, trust me), man flu (most women in relationships, also maybe some gay men would know the constant struggles when their man is sick the ‘man flu’ (usually it’s a cold)), mentions of depression, mentions of panic attacks, fluffiness

Word Count: 2,466

a/n: was reading @supernatural-jackles preference list, the title is same as her preference when the boys are sick. Here’s my imagination running wild when I should be preparing to post 7 Days to Die. But, Dammit Jen’s so good, plus, Jen, I hope this is okay...I never talked ahead of time with you about it, this happened spontaneously....I guess read and let me know if it’s all good. If not I’ll remove it.

They had been in the town for a number of days. Hunt finished, long finished. But it turns out, someone, somewhere, somehow, the boys got sick with a nasty virus.

Sam was the first down and out. Not throwing up, but heating up with a fever. But his gut feeling like he isn’t going to last. Even if he ate something light on his stomach.

Y/N offered a small variety of foods to the giant. Saltines, applesauce, banana, toast, mashed potatoes, soup, anything light. But he turned it down.

She heard retching in the bathroom. That leaves with the older Winchester. Now when he’s sick, he’s sick. Really sick. Hearing him lose the contents of last night’s supper told her he wasn’t going to be able to keep anything solid down. At least not heavy. But they need to eat something.

He came out after washing up, pale as a ghost. If not dead already. It worried her, seeing how pale he was.

“Any leads on Dick?” He asks, words slurred. A garbled burp escaped. Only to turn into another throw up session. When he felt something coming up, he turned at his heel to make it to the toilet.

It had been weeks since Bobby’s death, Dean was running himself ragged finding Dick. Both him and Sam both wanted revenge. But at least, Sam knows when to stop to sleep and eat. But Dean, has one speed. Go.

She could only shake her head. He needs to take a break.

“You are in no condition to keep this up Dean.” She says from the door.

“Rain or shine, I’m hunting Dick.” He says. He hears her snort. “Oh grow up.” he groans as another wave hit him. Only making him groan louder, unable to throw up.

She took the time to head out to grab some supplies for them before they leave to head to the hunters cabin where they hid out, but also primarily lived.

Grabbing canned soups, broth, and even grabbed a thing of potatoes to mash up. She had weird, not so traditional ways of getting nourishment when sick but also something to be easy on the stomach.

Driving back she heads to their room. Sam still in bed, sound asleep. She hears a moan from the kitchen. To find Dean on the floor.

“Dean!” she says, concerned. Dropping the groceries on the table before rushing over to help him up.

“I’m fine.” He slurs.

“You’re not fine, you’re on the kitchen floor for no reason.” She says, helping him up.

She could feel the muscles in his arms trembling, they were fatigued.

“The floor moved on me.” He mumbles.

As she struggles to get him up right, she had his back at her chest, so his head fell back on her shoulder. He was out of it. But she wraps an arm around to touch his forehead.

“Dean, you’re burning up. We need to cool you off.” She says. Pushing him up to his feet.

“Seriously, I’m fine.” He continues.

He’s up, but knees weak nearly gave out. She has his arm around her shoulder as she practically dragged him to his bed. When his but landed on the side of the bed he didn’t stop the rest of his body to fall onto the bed with a significant bounce.

“No you’re not. You got something, you and Sam both. You threw up, and are running a fever. You need to stop and rest. It’s not gonna kill you.” She says.

He didn’t have the energy to fight her. He doesn’t even fight her when she takes his boots off. Undressing him down to his t-shirt and boxers, tucking him in bed under a thin layer of sheets.

I’m gonna have to play nurse. She thought.

Pulling the thermometer out on the boys. Sam rang a temperature in the hundreds, but it was easily manageable.

“102, just rest up Sam, ‘kay?” she says.

Sam nods. “No problem, this sucks.” He groans.

“I’m making some soup and mashed potatoes. It’s cream of chicken and veggie soup. What’s best is you could also put some of the soup on the potatoes.” She suggests.

“Sounds good, my stomach has calmed down some, so I’ll try some.” He says.

“That’s good.” She says.

“How’s Dean?” he asked.

“His fever is nearing 104, he ate a few saltines before taking the fever reducer. He’ll try to throw up, but it just turns into dry heaves, I can tell they hurt. Whatever he got, it’s worse than what you have.” She says.

“If he gets worse?” he asks.

“He might need to go to the hospital then. For all I know it’s just the flu.” She says.

“The flu can get bad though.” Sam goes.

“In kids and the immunocompromised. And the elderly…And the uninsured…” she listed.

Sam chuckled. “It’s so sad how it’s preventable, but the government makes it a fucking hassle to just take care of your own health.” He says.

“And they die as the end result, because the meds they need or the care they need are too much for them, and they can’t get them. It’s wrong on so many levels. It’s like they’re bullies stealing our lunch money, they’re holding it out of reach and we’re too short to grab it.” she says.

“That’s what I was thinking of saying. But I’m not thinking straight.” He says.

“It’s the fever. Rest up Sammy. I’ll tell the caretaker we’re staying until you two are a little better. At least better enough for the road trip back to the cabin.” She suggests.

“I know I could, him I’m worried about.” Sam says. She nods, agreeing.

She was only able to get them the room for a couple of more hours before they had to move out. Sam was able to eat her soup and potatoes, Dean not so much. The smell of the food made him gag.

“I’m sorry sweetheart, I just made it look like your food smells awful, and it don’t. it smells amazing, my stomach is just in knots.” Dean whines, rolling on his side in his bed.

“It’s okay Dean, I know. I could tell you wanted to try but your stomach is making it rough. I’ll just pack it up in some topper wear and I’ll pack us up and drive us back.” She says.

“Um, no, you’re not driving my car.” Dean says, trying to get up. Only to dry heave while getting up, lurching forward, nothing coming up.

“Dean, you’re in no condition. Neither is Sam. I couldn’t get us to stay longer. You’re just going to have to deal with it.” she says. “I’ll help you out to the car when we’re ready.” She says.

The drive was smoother than it could have been. Dean passed out in the back seat; Sam curled up in his usual sleeping position when it came to sitting in the passenger seat.

She didn’t like driving older vehicles. They drove like boats, and this was worse, it was a truck. The year wasn’t that far off, but it was old enough. The four door truck had comfy, inviting seats that took Sam and Dean into dreamland in the instant they got comfortable.

She managed to get the cabin just fine, unpacking without jostling them awake. She got their beds ready with cleaner sheets, Sam was easy to wake up. He was eager to get into a bed. Dean was reluctant, already cozy and relaxed he was content with sleeping in the truck.

“Dean, you can’t stay in here. You’ll make your fever worse.” She says, nudging him awake more.

“Fine.” He mumbles, sitting up sluggishly. Shoulders slumped.

“Come on Dean, I’ll help you.” She says.

“I can walk myself.” He snaps. He’s grumpy.

She snapped her hand away from him, letting him walk himself. But kept to herself after that. But it didn’t really stop her from checking in on him.

Cleaning the cabin she put on her phone her music she’d sing to while doing such chores. Grew up on country music she listened to some old Keith Urban Music, from his albums Defy Gravity, Love, Pain and the Whole Crazy thing, and Be Here, she dusted singing along to Standin’ Right in Front of You.

“Y/N, please stop singing! I’m trying to sleep!” she heard Dean shout from his room.

Feeling guilty, she just hummed the song as she cleaned. She felt bad for a minute, the feeling sticking with her throughout her cleaning.

She cooked up more soup for the boys, cleaned, and once done she just jammed out on the couch with the TV on Spanish Soap Operas. Trying to shake the guilt feeling she had early, as it crept back up on her.

That night, after the boys ate and got situated for bed, one Winchester had something on his mind.

She was watching cable television, surfing here and there trying to get away from Spanish Soaps, but always finding her way back when finding nothing else on. She heard the floor creak behind her.

Her headphones were off, music off, just relaxing watching TV, she turned to see the older Winchester standing adjacent of the couch. Looking exhausted.

“You’re not coming to bed?” he asked. Voice still rough from being sick.

“I’m not tired. Besides, you need the bed. You’re still sick.” She says softly.

“You’ve been cleaning all day, taking care of me and Sam, you’ve got to be exhausted.” He says, something off about his tone.

“Dean, it’s fine. Just go back to bed, rest.” She says kindly.

He doesn’t say anything to that, but sits on the couch with her.

“Do you even like Spanish Soap Operas?” he asks, hiding a chuckle.

“I don’t like Soap Operas period.” She says. “But we got only cable TV, and it’s 2 in the morning. There’s nothing on.” She says.

“I’m sensing there’s more going on.” Dean goes.

“Dean, why are you up in the first place?” She asks. “You’re sick, you need to rest to get better.” She adds.

“Well see, there’s this girl. She’s more than a friend to me. I’ve been kind of a dick to her lately.” He says.

“Dean, it’s not your fault. I shouldn’t have babied you; I should have kept it down when I was cleaning. It’s fine.” She says.

“And I know how sensitive you are, and can be. You love to take care of those you love. I’m the same way.” He says. “I guess I was more mad at myself for getting sick, I was so fixated on finding Dick I even didn’t care how sick I got.” He adds.

“You got a drive in you it’s scary, but it’s fine Dean. You’re only human. You have limitations, we all do. But you got to recognize your physical limitations and give yourself a break, and then get back at it again when you’re better.” She says.

“Back at you sweetheart.” He goes.

“Huh?” she asks.

“You got to know your mental limitations too. I’ve noticed how quiet you’ve been getting since we got sick. Plus, in the past, I’ve seen it happen. Sam mentioned it to me, Bobby knew it. Depression. It’s no joke Y/N. You got to take care of yourself mentally too.” Dean says.

She locks up, her walls going on. And he sees her tense. “And it’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it. but you can’t bottle it up. You got to deal with it. But you don’t have to do it alone.” He adds.

She nods, fiddling with her fingers.

“What has that demon told you in your head lately?” he asks.

“I’m not doing good enough to care for you or Sam.” She says quietly. Voice beginning to crack. “Stop trying.” She adds.

“You know that’s bull shit right?” he asks. He can see her shake her head.

“You snapped at me, yelled at me to keep it down.” she says. “That’s when it started getting bad.” She adds.

“And now?” he asks.

“It’s saying he’s going to throw you out; he doesn’t want you or your issues. You’re too much for him.” She says. Her throat holding back a sob.

“I’d never do that to you. You’re more than my friend, you’re my girl. I know I haven’t been the best friend lately. But I’m here now. Yes I’m sick, but I want to be there for my girl.” He says. “I’ll kick this demons ass for you, just tell me what you need.” He adds.

“I’m about to have a panic attack, I can feel it come on, can you hold me through it?” she asks, her voice disappearing.

Not saying a word, he invites her in his arms, and the two cuddle on the couch as she cries her eyes out, shakes and trembles, and works to get her breathing under control.

After a while she fallen asleep in the Older Winchester’s arms, when a wooden creak can be heard in the living room.

“How is she holding up?” Sam asks, walking in.

“She’s asleep now, that was a bad attack from the looks of it.” Dean says.

“How are you feeling by the way?” Sam asks.

“Better, but still a little under the weather. You?” He says.

“A bit better. Just a sore throat now.” Sam answers.

“I say we take care of her tomorrow, even if she’s not sick, but she needs us.” Dean says.

“I agree with that.” Sam says. “You up to carrying her or?” He asks.

“Dude, I’m exhausted. And I really don’t want to move her. Just grab us a blanket and some pillows, we’ll crash here.” Dean says with a groan.

“Sure thing.” Sam says with a tired smile. Heading into Dean’s room, grabbing a few blankets, a couple of pillows and heads back to the couch covering them up, and handing Dean the pillows.

“Night Jerk.” Sam goes.

“Night Bitch.” Dean says.

Sun rose high that morning. Dean woke up with, feeling a warm spot on his chest. Seeing her still asleep, not moving from her spot.

Brushing a strand of hair back, his fingers grace over her forehead. His brows furrow when he feels how warm she feels.

She moans, waking up, causing a dry cough.

“Sounds like someone got sick.” Dean says.

“I feel sick too.” She says, her voice rough and scratchy.

“I finally get to return the favor, and take care of you for a change.” He says with a big grin, hugging her close making her giggle.

“I’m loving it so far.” She says hugging him back.

Copying and reposting someone else’s content is plagiarism and illegal. This work is property of supernaturallyobsessedchic. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. These works contain material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited. No part of these works may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without express written permission from the author / publisher. An electronic reference link to the original posted work may be provided for purposes of promotion or assistance of publication by the readers discretion, if proper credits are given to the author in the re-post. 10/2/2020

Dean Taglist:

@pandazombie69, @luci-in-trenchcoats, @supernatural-jackles, @becs-bunker, @mlovesstories, @winchesters-favorite-girl

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until-theend-oftheline · 6 years

Text

Smoke and Sparks

Pairing: Steve x Reader

Warnings: Smokey kitchen.

Word Count: 1100ish

Square Filled: Firefighter AU for @marvelfluffbingo

A/N: This is written for @after-avenging-hours and my prompt was Firefighter!Steve. Sorry about it being so late!

It’s is also done for @feelmyroarrrr who requested: Firefighter Steve rogers. Rescues the elderly neighbour of our gal who, as she sees her as a substitute grandma, makes a batch of brownies and cookies to go thank him. When they see each other they realise they knew each other in high school and it's lovely and he asks her out, as had been too scared when younger. She accepts as had always liked him (cliche I know but i love it)

I’m really sorry this is not longer. The ending is more open than the request suggested. I don’t know why but I struggled with this one for some reason and kinda like where it ended. I don’t know why the struggle but maybe because it’s the first time I’ve written anything for the Avengers in AU.

Betaed by: None. All mistakes are mine.

***My fics are not to be saved nor posted on any other sites without my express written permission.***

Nanna had come running out into the hallway the second you made it into the building. She was a retired elderly woman and you had been neighbors for the past five years. You didn’t have a lot of family in town so she had become like a surrogate grandmother to you. For better and for worse, but you loved her.

Hearing her talk about how her apartment had almost burned down had scared the shit out of you at first. Right up until you realized it wasn’t as bad as she made it out to be. Her old stove, you had told her to get changed out for years now, had finally thrown in the towel and gone out in a blaze of glory according to her. Yeah, she was a little dramatic but truthfully that was one of the things you loved most about her.

The apartment was fine and nothing other than her stove and a few cabins had suffered their demise before the firefighters had gotten there. Three very handsome firefighters and a lovely young woman, according to Nanna. You sat at her kitchen table, looking around the room, silently thanking whoever was listening that it hadn’t been worse than it was. You listened to her story of how she had made the firefighters coffee as a thank you and given them all sandwiches for the road, “because God knows when they would have time to eat again.”

By the way, she was talking, you could tell they had treated her extremely well and been more than patient with your quirky loveable old neighbor. Which was the reason you decided to bring a batch of cookies down to the fire station the following day.

Next day was your day off, so you spend the morning in the kitchen baking 3 kinds of different cookies now knowing which they would prefer. Either way, you were sure they wouldn’t go to waste. You were confident in your abilities and you had spent a fair amount of time at the fire station as a kid. One of your best friends and study buddies in high school pretty much lived at one. His mom was a single parent and she worked as the secretary and dispatcher there.

It had been a while since you thought of Steve and the memory brought a smile to your face. You had really liked she shy artistic boy and you hoped he was doing well in life. Sometimes you couldn’t help but wonder what could have been between the two of you, had one of you only worked up the courage to ask the other out. Then again. You were kids and kids drift apart when college and work take you down different paths.

It didn’t stop your happy little memories of him from filling your mind as you made your way down to the local fire station. You walked around back, calling out into the garage.

“Hello?”

“Hey there,” a dark-skinned man with a warm smile appeared from behind one of the trucks. He wasn’t in full gear but had clearly been working on the truck. “Can I help you with something?”

“Yeah. I’m looking for the crew that was called out stove fire at Wesson Street yesterday?” you returned his smile as it grew on his face.

“That would be us. I’m Sam. That guy stuck under the truck there is Bucky,” Sam introduced and only now did you notice a pair of legs sticking out from the undercarriage of the vehicle.

“I’m not stuck,” a voice grumbled and Sam instantly but a food on the wheeled plate that Bucky was lying on, preventing him from scooting out.

“You sure about that?” Sam grinned, sending you a wink and you couldn’t help but giggle as Bucky swung his leg, placing a solid kick against Sam’s knee. He jumped and rubbed it, glaring at Bucky who rolled out with a grin plastered on his face.

Your eyes widened as you saw the man. Bucky or James as you knew him had gone to your high school the year above you. His hair was much longer and he had grown into a handsome man, but it was the same charming smile and kind eyes from back then. He had been an athlete, but never the douchey kind. Actually, you remembered him sticking up for Steve more than once when kids tried to bully him over his smaller stature.

“James?” you asked and Bucky instantly turned his attention towards you. He squinted before a smile of realization spread across his face. He was on his feet, with you wrapped in a warm embrace before you had time to comprehend what was going on.

“Y/N! It’s so good to see you. What are you doing here?” Bucky enquired, before peaking under the towel you had placed over the trays you were carrying. “Tell me these are for us?”

“They are,” you giggled instantly comfortable in Bucky’s presence. He had that effect on people. “How about I carry them inside before you start eating.”

“You’re no fun,” Bucky grinned, wrapping his arm around your shoulder. “I’ll show her the main room. Can you gather the other’s Sam?”

The fire station felt like home and as soon as you were in the main room you started spreading out the cookies on plates with the help of Bucky. You were only just done when the other firefighters started streaming through the doors.

“This is our fire chief Tony. That’s Clint, Sam you met and this is my girlfriend Nat. She’s hot right?” Bucky introduced, wrapping his arm around the redhead’s waist pulling her against his side, causing her to lovingly roll her eyes at him and smack his chest. You laughed at the playful affection between the two as you began shaking her, Tony and Clint’s hands introducing yourself only to freeze up with the voice sounding behind you.

“What’s all this?”

A playful smirk spread across Bucky’s face as you turned around staring into the kind blue eyes of the boy you been in love with all through high school. Only he was no longer a skinny little kid. He was all grown up and now even a little taller than Bucky, whose teasing voice sounded behind you as a blush crept into you and Steve’s cheeks both with the recognition.

“Oh right and you know Stevie.”

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Chris Evans/Steve Rogers Tag Team

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akittenwrites · 6 years

Text

Anxiety

Title: Anxiety

Author: @deanwinchesterxreader

Beta-reader: @emoryhemsworth

Summary: The reader suffers from an anxiety disorder and Dean is there to support her.

Type: one-shot

Pairing: Dean x reader

Word count: 1468

Warnings: swearing, anxiety.

Tagging: @deanssexyassbutt@sherlock44@anokhi07@supernatural-jackles @sm0l----bean @megapleasantturtle

Your name: submit What is this? // <![CDATA[ document.getElementById("submit").addEventListener('click', myHandler); function myHandler() { var v = document.body.innerHTML; var input = document.getElementById("inputTxt").value; v = v.replace(/\by\/n\b|\(y\/n\)/ig, input); document.body.innerHTML = v; } // ]]>

She couldn’t sleep that night, no matter how much she tried to control her breathing, to focus on Dean’s warmth, or to count to a thousand. Her mind would go back to that one time in middle school when the wind blew her skirt up and everyone saw her Spongebob panties. Or earlier today when the cashier at the store told her to enjoy her ice cream and she responded with “you too.” Fuck. So much cringe.

She’d also had a fight with Sam because he hadn’t emptied the coffee machine. She knew she shouldn’t have yelled at him, Sam was usually very clean, but for some reason he had left old coffee in there, and when she wanted to make herself some, she couldn’t. Why was he so inconsiderate? Cleaning up after oneself was a matter of respect… so she told him. Maybe she was a little harsh, and he got mad.

She shouldn’t have said anything. She should’ve just cleaned the fucking coffee machine herself and she wouldn’t be feeling this way right now. She should just avoid any type of confrontation ever. Or live by herself. She felt a lot less anxious when it was just her and her car on the road. It wasn’t fair. Sam had probably already forgotten about the fight, as they had both apologized right after. She was sure he was sleeping soundly right now, or maybe researching for the next hunt.

She couldn’t, though.

Maybe she should text him to make sure everything was alright between them. But what if it woke him up? No, she shouldn’t. She’d have to wait until the morning and talk to him about it again. Perhaps that wasn’t the best idea, either. If he had already forgotten about it, bringing it back up would only make things worse. She should just let it go.

But it was impossible. Her mind kept racing, and she wished she would just fucking disappear from the face of the earth so she wouldn’t have to confront Sam ever again. Or Dean. Because Dean probably thought she shouldn’t have been so harsh on his brother, that she was hysteric, exaggerated, or maybe even crazy. Maybe he thought he had made a mistake living with her, since she was such a nutcase, acting like a piece of shit over a cup of coffee.

She turned around in bed for the umpteenth time, the pressure inside her chest not letting up, and Dean moved beside her.

“Y/N?” he mumbled.

“Dean,” she whispered, her heartbeat speeding up. “Sorry I woke you up. Go back to sleep.”

“Is everything alright?”

“Yeah, just not feeling very sleepy. Probably shouldn’t have woken up late today,” she lied, clenching her jaw. How long until he broke it up with her?

He didn’t answer and she thought he had gone back to sleep until she heard the click of his bedside lamp and a soft yellow light filled the room. She turned to look at him, who eyed her with bleary eyes.

“Are you feeling anxious?” he asked, as if he were talking about the weather. How could he act so… normal, when it was tearing her up from the inside?

“Just a little,” she said, scooting close to him. He wrapped his arm around her. “I’ll be alright. Really. Don’t worry about it.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I don’t think talking about it will help,” she replied, biting her lip until it hurt. “Saying it aloud is embarrassing. It’s ridiculous. Really.”

“Then tell me how you feel,” he insisted. When she didn’t answer, he sat up in bed and patted the spot beside him. “I’m not goin’ back to sleep sweetheart. Talk to me.”

“I just…” she sighed, swallowing for the fifth time in the past twenty seconds. She took her sweet time sitting next to him, her teeth permanently clenched, but she couldn’t come up with the words to express her feelings. God, it was so hard. “Sometimes it feels like everything I do is wrong. Like I’m always fucking up. It’s like no matter which choice I make, it will always be the wrong one.”

“But it’s not,” he said, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. “Y/N, it’s not. Trust me.”

“I do!” she answered, tugging at her tank top. “I try. Rationally, I know I’m not such a fuck up. I mean, I save lives. You guys let me live in the bunker because you like me, right? But I still feel like I’m a horrible person sometimes. And that you only let me live here because you made a mistake and don’t know how to get rid of me. And I know it’s not true! Or maybe I don’t. I don’t know. It’s not up to me. I can’t control it, alright?”

“I know sweetheart, I know. I’m just trying to help you,” he took a deep breath, his hand massaging her shoulder. “Sammy and I love you. No matter what that little head of yours is trying to make you believe, we love you. And we want you to be here with us, okay?”

“Okay,” she whispered, nodding. Her eyes started filling with unshed tears and she cursed herself for being so sensitive. “Okay. It’s just that I had a fight with Sam today and... I’m sorry I’m bothering you like thi—”

“You’re not,” he interrupted, his fingers tracing circles on her arm. “Just listen to me. Everything will be alright. I know you’re worried right now. I can feel your heartbeat going crazy. Just breathe, okay? Let me do the talking. I like being here with you. I like taking care of you. Sam likes you as well. It was just a little fight, meaningless, and not as bad as you think it is. You have a right to get a little angry from time to time, nobody blames you for it, okay sweetheart? It’s okay now. I had already forgotten it had happened, that’s how small it was.”

“You sure you don’t think I’m cranky and bossy?” she asked. “‘Cause I am. Bossy. And I’m always complaining about stuff and…”

“Alright, let me stop you right there. First, you’re not always complaining. You just think you are cause you always think the worst about yourself. The rest of us don’t notice your flaws as much as you do. I’m way more problematic than you are, and here we are. If you can stand me with all my baggage, why couldn’t we stand you? Besides, we see the good stuff about you too. You don’t. You only see the bad things and think about them over and over until you’ve made them out to be horrible. Don’t bully yourself. Second, I fight with him all the time, it’s normal when you’re stuck 24 hours with one person. And we forget about it and move on, and I know he’s over it already. It’s not a big deal, you had a fight and you made up, don’t let it get to your head. And third, you’re not bothering me. I love you, Y/N. I’ll repeat it as many times as I have to to make sure you understand. I love you, and everything will be alright. You’ll feel better by the morning. I know sometimes it feels like it’s the end of the world, but it’s not.”

“Thank you,” she said, sniffling. What had she done to deserve him? “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Don’t thank me,” he kissed the top of her head. “I’m here for you. I love you and Sammy loves you. And we think you’re amazing and smart and we are lucky to have you.”

“You have no idea how much I needed to hear that. Really.”

“It’s the truth, sweetheart,” he whispered. “I’ll just keep sayin’ it till you believe it.”

“Do you mind…” she hesitated, worried about sounding too pathetic. “Cuddling for a while?”

“‘Course not,” Dean answered, sliding down on the bed, holding her in his arms. “I’m here for you. I’m never leaving you. Whenever you feel like the entire world has turned against you, or that nobody loves you anymore, remember that I’m still here. I don’t want you to ever doubt that you’re loved. I will never leave your side, Y/N. You can come to me and I will show you that there will always be one person in this world that loves you, even if you don’t love yourself. Because I will always be here for you, sweetheart. Whenever you need me. You will always have me. Always, always, always.”

He kept telling her he loved her and everything would be alright as she drifted off to sleep. Wrapped in his arms, she was safe from the outside world. And she was safe from herself.

#dean x reader #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester imagine #dean imagine #spn x reader

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