#also because i know i am better

[barghest-land]

ata tu corazón, mi amor, y arrástralo por la tierra

#this art hurts so bad #in a way i'd never be able to explain #also it just upsets me a lot because i don't like how i did it:( #idk how to make it better so i'm just gonna leave it as it is #and go to sleep good night #it was supposed to be cool and simple just like that #but in my eyes it's just missing everything and i don't know how to fix it #genuinely thought it was gonna be a good art but here i am oh well. that happens i guess #im sorry javier :(( i'll make more good art i promise #barghestland #art #artists on tumblr #rdr2 #rdr2 fanart #javier escuella

[lilybug-02]

Wow. That could not have turned out worse.

Part 23 || First || Previous || Next

--Full Series--

This comic will be on Holiday Hiatus this December and January! While on a cliffhanger? What a scam! >:/

#Chara finally realizes something is wrong....very wrong #And you get to see little Chara for all of 2 drawings. wow. You guys are so spoiled uwu #Asriel and Chara bbfs #finally out of that darn tootin' Darkworld! WE'VE BEEN THERE FOR 2 YEARS!!! #LORE TIME LORE TIME. I know Chara is very vague about it but player-human relationships are very personal. #it can be hard to talk about them if you've been possessed yourself. especially with some stigmas around it #chara just wanted a glass of water. why you gotta do this to em #I am so so so happy to get here #the full excitement has faded since I first thought up this scene but It's still one hell of an accomplishment #YOU GUYS HAVE NO IDEA how many times I reworked this and how many rough drafts I've thrown out the window because of it. #tbh. I may post the 10+ rough pages that will never see the light of day #Im glad I didnt go through with that scrapped plot bc It was too many unneeded pages. I've learned to start condensing in a better way #I am also planning on showing off my Patreon soon :) so I'll be posting complete scrapped story lines over there #deltarune chara timeline #deltarune #utdr #deltarune chara timeline comic #art #my art #bread #chara #asriel #saloon darkworld #darkworld #deltarune au #college chara #college asriel

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Average Drama Enjoyer observes some peak drama.

#dungeon meshi #toshiro nakamoto #laios touden #kabru #izutsumi #Before anyone mistakes this as mischaracterization: The joke here is that it's ambiguous what the hell he means. #Kabru does love getting into fights a bit more than average but he's mostly here for the drama. #I screenshot the scene of him going 'The dark arts!' with a little smile everytime I re-read dungeon meshi. He's so catty. I love him. #And shout out to Izutsumi for adding fire to the drama. Girl said 'I am the listener. I heard that shit.' and refused to apologize. #Joke two: the deep cut - Welcome to more propaganda for whatever the hell is going on between Laios & Shuro & Kabru. #Laios trusting Shuro with some *heavy* information because he admires him so much! And wants to be his friend so badly! #Kabru also has another great character moment when he immediatly clocks Laios as not being as malicious as expected. #We love a character who can put the clues together! It is such a good subversion of what role we think Kabru is to play in this story! #Now he's eager to befriend Laios - who is barely interested and currently trying to befriend Shuro - who is barely interested and...well. #The painful triangle of people trying to get to know the other person better and being rejected...Friendship triangle. #We have all had a friendship triangle situation before. Right? You guys have also struggled to read people. Right? #Laios is universally relatable. Right?

[theminecraftbee]

okay, so in a rare moment for me, there's a discourse thing i want to bring up, and that thing is. okay. so on iskall's stream there's this thing that can happen where someone brings up a criticism of his content or vault hunters. frequently it's self-evidently wrong, but sometimes it's not. and then iskall spends the next thirty minutes shadowboxing this guy, explaining himself, and completely derailed. and this is an iskall trait we all know and sigh bemusedly about, because he cares about the community and wants people to understand his intentions! he wants the community to understand his decisions!

however, it's not the community as a whole he's fighting; he is in fact, arguing with One Guy, who often doesn't represent the wider community, and who normally won't have their mind changed. hell, sometimes it's believable that they're satisfied having just managed to upset iskall, and they'll leave, no change to their mind, perfectly pleased that iskall's responding at all (that's what i firmly believe the people who poke at the 'you don't upload enough and that means you're falling off and a bad person' wound are trying to do, at least).

in the vault hunters community, we refer to this as iskall getting One Guyed, and it's typically viewed as bad, because it ends up focusing an entire moment on a single guy's negative opinion as opposed to on the larger picture. and it's an understandable thing to have happen! but it's frustrating to watch from the outside.

and so now i am looking at that cat poll. and the way everyone is still shadowboxing someone who has since apologized. and the way i would have never ever known about any of the negative comments about jellie if it weren't for fellow mcyt fans constantly putting them on my dash to dunk on them. and it's like. if you look through the notes most of them are just... normal? it's only a tiny few of people (and the pollrunner, who has since apologized) who were being dicks. it's a very, very ignorable demographic.

but. well. there was One Guy. and we had to correct them.

and folks, i don't know how to say that i almost never see "lol mcyt is cringe" type comments unless one of you puts it on my dash. both because i don't go looking through the notes of things that are likely to have them or go looking for reasons to be upset and because it's just... not that common! very frequently these days it is, in fact, One Guy!

i have almost never seen that poll on my dash without at least one instance of the One Guy. instead of being for fun, it's mostly become about explaining ourselves to someone who will not listen and will not change their minds, and treating this as a the whole of the Other Side of that poll, when most people are being... fine. they're fine! the majority of the people voting for the other side are doing it for perfectly normal reasons that don't require fighting about.

and man. let me tell you. after spending as long as i have watching vault hunters development? it can be just as frustrating to watch a fandom get One Guyed as it is to watch iskall.

#discourse #i am immediately turning notes off for this post as a heads up because i HATE discoursing but #man. i feel like i need to point this out. #sometimes you'll be happier if you go 'that was One Guy huh. better just block them and move on. i won't change their mind.' #one day this fandom will learn. #cat of the year poll #<- for those also trying to block it #also i know in many ways this is just me contributing i'm aware of my flaws #but sometimes i think this fandom needs to step back and realize it doesn't really need to fight the world. #sometimes someone says a mean thing. that sucks! you do not need to fight them for two days about it though. #and we do this with polls but also other people's innocuous comments SO MUCH. #so here i am.

[4me2knowandyou2wonder]

A thought popped into my head and now you all have to suffer with me <3

What if, Ghost is a bad kisser. I doubt he’s had much opportunity to practice. From a home where all his energy was focused on staying safe, straight into the military where he wasn’t interested in pursuing anyone. By the time he has his real first kiss it’s late in life, and a big bulky guy like that? You just know the kiss was stiff and stilted. I bet his first kiss out right tells him it was awful.

So Ghost doesn’t know how to kiss.

When he and Johnny finally get together the confession happens though a mask. Soap, being respectful, kisses him through the mask. And for about a week that’s how they share all their kisses.

Soap thinks it’s just a boundary for Ghost. Ghost really wants to kiss Soap normally and not through the mask but knows he’s a terrible kisser and doesn’t want to scare Johnny off.

When the truth does finally come out Soap all but cackles. ‘You mean I get to teach you how to kiss?’ ‘I only see this as a golden opportunity, L.T.’

Later

‘Oh, yeah, we’re going to have to practice (pregnant pause) a lot.’ (Waggles eyebrows)

Not sure if Ghost ever gets better at kissing, being a terrible kisser might just be set into his bones by now. but Soap doesn’t seem to mind at least.

#I strategically avoided mentions of Roba in this post. But I have a feeling factoring that part in would only make the story better #I seriously doubt the situation would make him a better kisser (it would make him worse) #fear that he will also hate kissing himself would be in there too #but I omitted it from the post because I don’t actually know ghost backstory all that well and am avoiding inaccuracies #ghost x soap #soap mw2 #soap cod #john soap mactavish #soap mctavish #cod headcanons #cod #ghost cod #simon ghost riley #ghostsoap #ghost mw2 #soapghost #soap call of duty #ghost mwii #mw2 #call of duty #cod modern warfare #modern warfare two #soap x ghost

[amelia-yap]

AUEGH

#ruby rose #rwby #obligatory tiny distressed ruby #my art #HELLO I HAVE OFFICALLY FINISHED YET AGAIN ANOTHER ONE OF MY SEMESTERS #and holy shit it was the most awful by far #i felt like absolute shit the entire sem and was behind in literally all of my classes #it was so shit that i actually skipped a class because of the stress of being behind on work. which i had never done before. #i am a criminal now lmao i feel so bad #also a little mad at myself because i know i could've done better. i've been doing the bare minimum and cutting corners #which was very noticeable lol #im gonna actually split my upcoming semester this time my ass and health cannot do this anymore #BUT ANYWAY I FINISHED MY SEMESTER RAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH #COUGHS OUT BLOOD AND SINKS BACK INTO EARTH'S CORE AND EVAPORATES #IM DONE!!! #also my eyes are really red now for some reason #probably from the lack of sleep or the long hours staring at my bloody laptop idk #probably both #yeah i should go sleep now lol bye #ranting in the tags because i don't know how to talk like a normal person lmao #sorry if you read all this nonsense jkdhkfsdhfkhd #but i should be more active around here again!

[godofsmallthings]

i wish i could take the time to parse through my taylor swift is/isn't a gay icon thoughts on here but i fear people on this website don't know how to behave

#like she isn't a gay icon. but she is a lesbian icon? but like in different ways than gay icons have historically been gay icons #basically what i'm trying to say is that her status as a lesbian icon has literally nothing to do with her interactions with the lesbian #community. like i don't feel particularly revered or nurtured by her in the way someone like gaga has taken the time to #actually sit with and deliberately cater to gay culture for example #like it's different. #and almost entirely fandom-led #whether taylor is actually queer is also irrelevant to this #am i making any sense? #like okay i think you could argue she did a little bit of it in 2019 but we all know how that felt/came across #she's better at being a gay icon when she's explicitly not including the queer community in her work or acknowledging them in any way #because it's literally not of her own volition #and i'm honestly not convinced it's an aspect of her art or fanbase she considers #sometimes it feels like it actively makes her uncomfortable #and yet she really has become entrenched in modern day lesbian pop culture iconography in these last few years #anyway this isn't me Saying Anything. i'm just thinking about it #vi is typing...

[genericpuff]

vent post

#and before anyone who hates my shit says “yeah because you ARE a loser way to have self awareness for once” #i promise you this would be me with or without the LO fandom LMAO #anxiety is a hell of a thing #and as much as i internally guilt myself into thinking it would be better if i just shut up and hid away forever #i also know that's the trauma speaking because the adults around me always told me to shut up #and even as an adult i still encounter people who talk over me and make me feel like i'm not allowed to be outspoken #but the pen is mightier than the sword and all those years i've spent being spoken over i've been honing my penmanship #i have fun talking about the things i talk about and i don't have any less right than anyone else to do it #i am cringe and i am free #self post #vent post #altho on another note i do wanna make time this week to go find new series to read #too many of my favorites have turned to shit and it's taken its toll #i KNOW there are better comics out there that are genuinely well made #i already have a few that i'm reading that i love but i need to balance out the good with the bad more lol #i just need to take the time to go find good stuff instead of pouring so much of my attention into the bullshit that doesn't deserve my tim #i think both things can be true #i can have a lot of fun dissecting and writing about series i don't like #while also nourishing myself with good works that restore my faith in this medium #“perfectly balanced as all things should be”

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

This election day, I'm thinking of my Nana.

I'm thinking of how as a young woman, she fled political violence in her native Colombia to build a new home in a more stable country. I'm thinking about how she lived a long life, but not long enough to see her home country elect its first ever progressive president (just a few months ago!).

Coincidentally, I was living in Colombia at that time (in the very city she grew up in), and I was able to witness what felt like a miracle. A very conservative country, suffering from the violent inheritance of colonization and catholic invasion and the war on drugs, against a backdrop of the dangerous global rise of the far right--this unlikely country managed to elect one of the most progressive heads of state in the world, in 2022. That's a pretty big deal.

And I'm thinking about this, this election day, because that election was won by a very thin margin. I'm thinking about how it almost didn't happen. I'm thinking about how it was only possible thanks to the highest voter turnout in 20 year. And I am thinking about the countless number of voters who chose to vote for the first time. I am thinking of the poorest and most disenfranchised citizens who showed up at the polls. I am thinking of the indigenous women who rode 12 hours on public buses to vote at the 'nearest' polling stations. I am thinking of all the money and corruption that went into preventing minority citizens from voting, and I'm thinking about how they showed up in the millions and voted anyway.

I am thinking that I would like to see a miracle like that in my own home country.

So if you're on the fence about waiting in line today to cast your vote, I hope that you will think--about the country you want to live in, the future you hope will unfold, and about all of the people it takes to make a miracle.

Because history may deem us nameless and faceless, but when we show up en masse, we are the ones who make history happen.

And yes, maybe also spare a thought for my Nana. Who was in fact a very angry and judgemental woman who supported the republican party for 50+ years, and who would be turning in her grave right now (if the family hadn't had her cremated). Think about the mean angry ghost of my Colombian grandmother, who very much wants you to not show up at the polls to support abortion and other sinful progressive values. Think about her. Do it for her. Do it for Nana.

#Do it! for her #not a shitpost #serious post #politics #ask to tag #I love you Nana but i disagree SO vehemently with almost all of your personal political and religious values #also you should have treated my mom SO MUCH BETTER when she was a kid. all of your kids really #i see you very much as a victim of religious trauma & childhood poverty #followed by the cultural isolation of being a first generation immigrant with no local hispanic community to provide support #plus the failure of late 20th century mental health care almost certainly compounded by medical sexism #recognize sympathize and am indignant on your behalf for all of those reasons and more #but that truth can also coexist alongside the truth that #hot DAMN Nana you and Papa very much failed to provide your children with an emotionally safe and stable environment in which to grow #and me and my sibs are still dealing with the generational trauma #and who knows how many of my cousins. I HAVE TWENTY-ONE COUSINS AND I DON'T TALK TO ANY OF THEM #that is too many cousins to not be in contact with any of them #(and fyi that's on *one* side of the family. on the other side are a dozen half-aunts-and-cousins I've never met #because Other Grandpa was a Certified Piece of Shit) #Anyway. ANYWAY... #apparently i really needed to overshare today. know what? no judgement. judgement free zone #i have no judgement thoughts or opinions i am finally FREE #........gosh that sounds so relaxing #ANYway #yeah. break the cycle of abuse or your descendants will grow up and critique your parenting choices on third-tier social media platforms #when people say 'they will always be remembered' at a funeral--that is a THREAT #what they actually mean is 'OH HONEYBUN YOU DONE FUCKED UP' #.........i want that in my eulogy actually

[bittersweetresilience]

so do you think he succeeded?

#i woke up out of nowhere at seven in the morning with his speech playing in my head over and over again #a better world. a free world. turn me into shredded paper #and i was thinking about how i would be really annoyed if the wish never had any consequences because if that was the case félix deserved #to make his own. in this new world there's still obfuscation. people are still pulling the strings. there's still fucking nepotism LMAO #i also almost put the ring scene as who gets powers and who doesn't because i think a lot about whether ladybug would have granted all #sentimonsters autonomy or only the ones she perceives to be human #i didn't because i couldn't find anything else that fit what's right or wrong but know i have many thoughts on this subject #miraculous ladybug #🌃 #ml gifs #ml emotion #ml recreation #ough... félix #sunny from the future here i kept this in my drafts for a bit but it shall now be dispensed to you because i am a magnanimous ruler

[humanmorph]

therapy, huh

#phrygian #palisade #friends at the table #fatt #rosa art #palisade 20 #the worksheet. is also phrygian to be clear like i have to believe that a twilight mirage trained therapist would give out better material #than something i made in 10 minutes. #the branched....... the branched. branched concept of mental health care? who even knows. but it also has to be better. #and they definitly dont have worksheets. phrygian can make a bad one & then not really fill it out. it makes sense to me #i relistened to the therapy session to get the. timeframes saffron mentioned right and its like.wow this got even more depressing #in retrospect. #i tried really hard to make the worksheet look worse by scanning & printing & scanning it again but we JUST got a new printer at work #alas. it works too well. #btw can you tell im having fun with screentones? because i am. #its a nice solution for 'i dont want this in monotone but i ALSO dont want to color' #id in alt text #i hope its fine. #palisade spoilers #but from like 4 episodes ago.im just careful. #i havent listened to the new ep yet idk if ill get to it tomorrow? #MAN............... phrygian : (

[carlyraejepsans]

ppl already terribly misinterpret sans do you want him to have the morally grey female character treatment too

i don't give a crap can you imagine the glados level cat 5 lesbian event the "dead where you stand" scene alone would cause? the trope subversion of the worn-down, nihilistic bar sleaze male character archetype that he represents? soriel yuri? does anyone fucking care about soriel yuri???

#if there is one constant in fandom it's that female characters are treated like crap and passed over the male ones #because we live in a sexist misogynistic society and as any other social space fandom is going to present those social biases as well #now are you going to be a PUSSY and let that stop you from making female characters that FUCK HARD??? #or are you picking up your gotdang gun and fighting the yuri war with us #i am half kidding i know this ask was sent in jest #but also i am 100% serious it would all be worth it it would be world changing it would be a better timeline than ours #answered asks #sans #undertale

[cowardlykrow]

After Cyn's done tryna kill him, she'll eventually relent and they can get to work... whatever that is. I didn't do the outfit any justice, but the second i saw the Cowboy!Curt mega @ricky-mortis made i was literally like, "yes, that is IT."

This is, in my heart, a cannon fit for this au

#And if you disagree... well i cant hear you #K but i really am bad at clothes lol! and this weird pose kinda threw me off pretty hard so i will also blame that... #but i will do better next time #I am again letting people know his horse is 100% named after Cynthia because of the occasional attempts on his life 👍 #I think i'll dub this a Try hard Doodle because thats what it is actually #and now for me talking way to much in that tags because i'm a terror: #I was going to pair this with another drawing that actually features curtwen btw #but my wrist said “No” #so maybe tomorrow? #(also... i have never actually drawn a person ON a horse before so this was really weird to do #this was actually a full body image... and then i halved it but then i couldn't do his foot? so i halved it again!) #Saf #spies are forever #cowboys are forever #<- WOULD watch the shit outta that [laughing at the idea of all the songs made really really country] #Cowboys your spies #Also some fun but also pretty dumb Au stuff: my vers of this au has always taken place in the wildwest in my head #so around 1865 to 1895 #Art #and finally... OTL when the horse is better then the human #is the fact i drew animals for a majority of my life really obvious yet

[kagoutiss]

*complaining for no reason again because i am bored* i need more ppl to know that these. are all the same person these are literally canonically all the exact same individual person im begging u

literally almost all the ganondorfs are the exact same individual and almost all the ganons are the exact same individual, almost all the ganondorfs & ganons are the same exact person just in different forms and circumstances. except for FSA and maybe whatever the fuck is going on with TotK ganondorf but i still think it’s weird that he still has golden eyes & rounded ears when even the gerudo in TotK’s ancient past dont, but anyway ashfjsbfjsn

#not like you always have to subscribe to canon because it’s often impossible to know the truth of certain things #or some things that are canonical just suck and should be changed anyway but like #of all the things that are like relatively basic facts for ppl engaging in the Lore or whatever #ppl are like always. Always talking about ganondorf as if every iteration of him is a different person just like link & zelda #but so much of his character development stems from the fact that WW ganon and TP ganon are both different timeline offshoots of OoT ganon #i’m ​not even citing the ‘Official Timeline’ on this because it is silly & confusing but i just literally mean #in terms of basic canon continuity #that WW and TP were conceptualized even in the early 2000s to be the events that occur distantly after the two timeline splits OoT created #because OoT is a game about time travel and the entire concept of the split timelines in this series #originated from the two different scenarios that are created by link & zelda’s use of the master sword and the ocarina #WW ganondorf and TP ganondorf are both literal older versions of OoT ganondorf in 2 different futures #not to mention all of the ganons in the early games. OoT was made as a prequel that both literally and figuratively #attempted to humanize the main antagonist of the series #OoT ganondorf at the time WAS the ‘ganondorf with character development and an actual motivation’ #WW ganondorf (who is the same person.) just actually got to vocalize what specifically his motivation was #which is great!! and also retroactively gives OoT ganondorf more context & depth #can u tell i am off my meds at the moment and have nothing better to do with my time ahsjfhskfhdj

[leverage-ot3]

okay I’ve seen a lot of posts about sterling just being crowley and. guys. the implications just hear me out 😭😭😭

bending lore slightly here BUT let’s say crowley’s body was once inhabited by a human and crowley is possessing the body (maybe he kills the initial inhabitant bc he doesn’t care)

but he still has the guy’s memories. he doesn’t bother keeping up appearances with his ‘ex wife’ because he is too busy building up his hell empire. BUT for some reason he can’t quite identify, he still feels something towards his ‘daughter’. he lets the divorce happen and doesn’t feel the need (or desire) to fight for custody, but he can never quite forget her, to cast her out of his mind for good

some hijinks ensue with the leverage team. it’s mostly because even a grind culture demon wants some off time every once in a while, and for him the insurance investigator stuff is more of a hobby. interacting with the leverage crew is very low stakes for him, and honestly, quite amusing. they aren’t on his level power-wise, but that ford character gives him the mental exercise he hasn’t experienced in, well, he can’t even remember

he can feel their frustration and anger when they learn he has become employed by interpol and feeds off it. it’s great, and relaxing in a way he is never able to achieve while conducting hell-related business

one year he gets wind that olivia is in a really bad situation associated with his ‘ex wife’s’ new husband. he’s selling vital hardware to terrorists, and while that might actually be the kind of chaos he would normally support or be entertained by as the king of hell, something feels wrong about letting olivia stay anywhere near that man

he calls upon the body’s adversaries. he wouldn’t admit it, even under duress, BUT he feels slightly fond of them. nate for the three dimensional chess they play, sophie for her ability to charm and disguise, parker for her chaos and slightly unsettling nature (it’s the autism swag and being bad with human interaction but he doesn’t know that lol), hardison for his unapologetic intelligence and eliot for his hardened violent past and take-no-shit persona (he’s fun to tease)

they perform exactly as he expected, right into his carefully crafted plan. and then olivia is under his care and things get more complicated. he keeps her FAR, FAR away from anything related to the supernatural (heh). no one can find out about her, ESPECIALLY not those imbecile hunter brothers (if for nothing else than the embarrassment in revealing he has a weak spot)

not sure how to work it into this post but I also want to add that somewhere along the way he develops feelings for nate and sophie. the frame up job is near and dear to my heart and you can’t convince me that isn’t fighting as flirting behavior. his interpol persona is more of a side hustle so to speak, but he finds it fun (relaxing, even) to fill that role. there aren’t any obligations of other demons, bothersome hunters, or anything like that. nate and sophie are low stakes, except, they aren’t, really. they make him feel things he can’t ever really remember feeling. his heart beats fast when sophie sat in his lap and cradled his face, his hands sweat when nate gives him that certain smug look. he’s exasperated by the way they can run circles around him like no one else has ever before. they annoy him and get under his skin in a way no one else can and it’s infuriating. but also not, at the same time. maybe he likes it

and then the long goodbye job happens

hear me out and suspend your belief here for a second, because I can’t remember if crowley supernaturally knows when ppl die/are dead or not.

so nate is in interpol custody and the interviewer is obviously out of her depth. (most people are, when it comes to nathan ford.) he walks in and pours the man a drink, but he’s fuming. somewhere along the way he came to care about the team. hell and suffering is literally in his (official) job description, but he can admit (only to himself) that he admires what they do. it’s not for him, not anything close to where his passions and interests lie, but he respects their drive and purpose. he is also aware enough to acknowledge that they are a family, a group of misfits that never belonged quite anywhere except to each other.

and nate fucking blew it up, ruined it, because his vice is being so obsessed with the end game that he is apparently willing to let his team, his family, the people that anchor him to reality, die because the ends supposedly justify the means.

not this time. not to sterling crowley

he is enraged. he can admit within the confines of his mind that he cares for nate, for sophie, even for the other three (though nate and sophie have somehow made it a hierarchy where they are more important to him. which he will dissect later in private. maybe.)

nate let them die, he let sophie die, and for what? the black book? hell below, crowley would have made things easier somehow, if he knew that this was where nate’s sights had lied. he would have prevented this somehow. he wants to have prevented this. he doesn’t want any of them dead and is too afraid to check and verify because that would make it real. the idea of sophie (or any of them) somehow making it to hell instead of heaven would probably break something in him he might not be able to repare fully.

he yells at nate- he’s angry. hellfire burning in his heart because everything is ruined. the deaths aside (however hard it is to set them aside in his mind), nate will not recover from this, not ever. this will be the start of the end, he is sure. a miserable, guilt-ridden existence where he drinks himself to death and nothing will save him. it plays out in crowley’s mind in a thousand different ways that are beyond painful to conceptualize, even in theory.

the story starts to unravel and there is a game afoot. a solemn, miserable, infuriating game because the con is still in session because parker is alive and in the building- which sets another fire alight in his chest. ‘parker even know you got hardison killed?’ he rages for her grief when she finds out. he knows it will double when she finds out eliot has perished, too, because he isn’t fucking blind.

but nate is a brilliant man, lest he forget too quickly. they are all alive, and somehow still the entire crew slips through his fingers. he’s not even angry (he never would have been- he doesn’t actually try too hard to catch them. it’s about the game, not the consequences). he lets them keep the black book because he’s fucking exhausted and honestly, they more than earned it.

‘now we’re even. tell sophie to drive carefully’. they will never be even, not really. crowley would never admit or agree that being human is the superior state of being, but that have made him feel human in a way he doesn’t actually mind. they keep him on his toes and match him in a way unique to them, they remind him that there are other things than the realm of hell. not necessarily bigger than hell, but maybe just as important in a different sense.

watching the van drive away, something inside him settles. when he walked into the interrogation room that day he thought this was the beginning of the end. it’s not the end at all, not an end to anything. it’s a continuation of their story. maybe, he thinks, a beginning to a new era in it

#before anyone says anything YES I KNOW HOW SPN LORE WORKS I WATCHED IT FOR MANY YEARS #I am just making this silly post for my own (and possibly your) amusement #I’m not digging too heavily into spn plot because I haven’t watched in forever and don’t trust my memory to make accurate commentary lol #also I know it’s probably layed but lied looked better somehow don’t worry about it #sorry this is so long I wasn’t sure where to break it to a read more bc all of it was too important to me 😭💀 #tell me in the comments if you’d prefer a read more and where you think it should go #I haven’t been into spn for years HOW DOES THIS AU HAVE SUCH A CHOKEHOLD OVER ME #eliot spencer #parker #alec hardison #leverage ot3 #parker x hardison x eliot #(background) #nate ford #sophie devereaux #jim sterling #nate x sophie #nate x sophie x sterling #crossovers #leverage x spn #leverage x supernatural #supernatural #crowley spn #crowley supernatural #crowley #leverage #mine #not even queueing this I need it posted immediately. instant gratification #pls like rb comment etc I need the validation #I ended up putting a read more for the long goodbye job

[wis-art]

Women, so pretty, so shaped, i am so lesbian,,,

#im also incredibly dysphoric tonight #but i was told by my coworker im incredibly feminine by her earlier #and i mean yeah #..... #i am a tall weird internet woman who likes to draw #so funny how i thought i was bi #I'm just really into women... #my ex is a trans guy and he told me he thinks im lesbian and i had a “holy fuck this explains so much moment” #we broke up but we still have a weird queer relationship outside of social heteronormative norms that is hard to explain and only we #can really understand #im not into men because you know #im a lesbian #had a weird period in my life when i was dating a guy and said im a lesbian and i felt sooooo scared #turns out when youre on meds and your brain is working right you just stop caring about such things #i went on a parade wearing big lesbian flag and girls loved it :) #i dont really know if i ever want to date anyone again #but i think if you look at my art you can really tell my sexuality quite easily lolol #funny how love can be so complicated sometimes #i mean it was kind of inevitable we break up cause we're kind of incompatible but tbh #it was better for us #hehe