#also i guessed rodan's age

[ericmhe]

Godzilla Series Rewatch

#5: Ghidorah: The Three-Headed Monster

You know, given the title, one might argue this one wasn't meant to be a Godzilla movie, and it was a sort of crossover at a time when Rodan and Mothra had both starred in their own movies rather recently. Still, it's generally counted as such since Ghidorah has gone on to be something nearly like Godzilla's arch nemesis. It's also generally considered the start of Godzilla's somewhat accidental character development from villain to hero for the initial run of Godzilla movies.

This one was a favorite as a kid, probably helped by the definite turn towards the sillier and more character filled monsters in it. I had a vhs tape with an airing recorded on it with some show host... like guy in a safari hat and someone in a Godzilla mask and dinosaur suit...? I think the joke was something like Godzilla's estranged less successful relative or something... I barely remember that and no one in my family made much of a point of hanging on to those tapes. What stuck with me most of all was the scene where Mothra's trying to get Godzilla and Rodan to fight Ghidorah and parts of the fight itself so I definitely forgot about silly show host antics.

Watching these movies all in order and rather close together actually does kind of highlight Ghidorah as something of an escalation – both the widespread wind destruction of Rodan or an adult Mothra and those energy beams blowing up rows of buildings as Ghidorah flies overhead, a lot faster and more efficient than Godzilla's early slow rampages and closer to complete than Mothra or Rodan. It's just kind of funny that the movie doesn't show this until after it's told the audience this by having the fairies simply state that Mothra can't beat Ghidorah alone. Maybe it's just a matter of being used to more modern ideas of storytelling or a cultural thing.

I do feel like the movie drags somewhat until the monsters start showing up, but most of the monster stuff is entertaining. I do like how many fans like to bring up the conversation scene between Mothra, Roda, and Godzilla. The dub has some extra humor here, like the fairies expressing disdain at Godzilla's choice of “language” implying he cussed badly, which seems to be the internet's favorite part of the scene. Personally I've always been a bit more fond of “ahhh, these monsters are as stupid as human beings” but to each their own.

Funnily enough I called the three-headed monster “Gheedrah” for ages and really struggled to swap to “Ghidorah” and for some reason I've generally found the compromise pronunciation “Gheederah” to be kind of annoying. Guess which one the Japanese actors use in this movie? Funny thing is that I know it's inconsistent in future movies so being annoyed by anyone using any of the three pronunciations is deeply silly.

[ruubesz-draws]

Task failed successfully! Mothra you tried...

*DO NOT REPOST MY ART*

Honestly, they all need a break. They all had a rough childhood...

#Godzilla #godzilla vs kong #mothra #kong #anguirus #incorrect quotes #oof #big OOF #mothra is so done #but she kinda understands them sooo #let them have their pure childhood back #they deserve the pure happiness #poor kaiju #let them happy! #stop treating them like sh*ts humans!! #also i guessed rodan's age #idk #but i assume most are over millions of years old #(except kong ofc) #do not repost #my art

[butterflyinthewell]

I’m going to tell you the story of why I love Godzilla.

When I say not to make fun of an autistic person’s special interests, I say it from a place of deep understanding and pain. For me, an autistic SpIn is like being in love, or (for the aro folks out there), it’s like being with your best friend ever and it just feels so comfortable and good.

Sooooo in January my dad mentions wanting to watch KOTM with me. Any excuse to watch KOTM is good, so of course I jumped on it. We watched Godzilla KOTM. It’s the movie I spent all of 2019 talking about from January to May. I got it for Christmas 2019 because mom knew I was going to want it as soon as the first roar hit the screen in the theater. (I took her to see it as a Mother’s Day gift, she liked it too.)

Lemme tell y’all something: when I was a young kid, my dad got me into Godzilla. Starting when I was around 5, he told me the stories of the movies he’d seen (the whole Showa era and Godzilla 1985). So I knew about Godzilla, Rodan, Mothra, King Ghidorah, Minya, MechaGodzilla, Gigan, Hedorah, Megalon, etc long before I ever saw them.

My dad said “these are important characters.”

Then he started renting the movies when he felt I was old enough to not be scared by them (age 7 in 1987) and pointed out who was who.

And my first ‘real meeting’ with Godzilla was the same as the people in 1954, when he popped his head over that hill and roared that haunting sound I never forgot, and I was hooked forever.

I loved it. I loved all of it. Dad warned me about the ending of the ‘54 movie, so I wasn’t surprised by it, but I still cried! He got me over it by showing the the rest of them, as if to go “see, he’s okay!” Then dad warned me that Godzilla was ‘the bad guy’ again in Godzilla 1985, but didn’t tell me how it ended. I was reaaaaally upset when he fell into that volcano. I probably cried about it for three days. That scream still hits something in my soul.

My favorite childhood Godzilla movie is Godzilla’s Revenge. It’s the first Godzilla movie I ever owned. I loved Ichiro’s dreams of making friends with Minya, outsmarting his kidnappers and standing up to his bullies. I even tried to pick up Monster Island using a little portable am/fm radio I had as a kid. It didn’t work, all I got was static, but I sure tried! 😋

I wanted to be an island lady like Saeko from Son of Godzilla who could call monsters for help. I wanted to be a cyborg like Katsura, except I would use MechaGodzilla to make friends with Godzilla instead of trying to hurt him.

Anyway...

Dad’s interest in Godzilla stuff kinda dropped away as the 90s hit and my autistic traits began to make me deviate more and more noticeably from my peers. I had seen all the Showa era movies, so he stopped telling stories because there weren’t any more to tell.

My love for Godzilla carried on into the Heisei era and beyond. Dad acted like I should “leave that crap behind” when I kept buying movies and talking about them to him. He didn’t want to watch them with me or look at pictures in the Godzilla Compendium I picked up.

I didn’t stop my enthusiasm for Godzilla, I just stopped sharing it with dad. I kept at it through high school. I sobbed over Godzilla vs Destroyah because I thought that was the end of the franchise, and I can’t even mention what happened to Godzilla in that movie. If you’ve seen it, you know.

In the year 1998 the rumblings for the ‘98 movie started around New Years, so of course I made noise about going to see it. Because GODZILLA, y’all!

Well, dad surprised me and took me to see Godzilla ‘98 when it came out. I had been bugging about going to see it and he kept giving me a hard no, then had me convinced we were going to a baseball game that night instead. I did nothing to disguise my boredom or hurt in the car, and it broke when we pulled up to the theater. Okay, he pulled a fast one on me and he said I did an emotional 180 spin, but it was worth it. (I still like that movie, but I don’t call that creature Godzilla. I call him Zilla or GINO instead.)

Literally right after that my dad would get mad if I talked about Godzilla. He griped that I was “so obsessed with that stupid monster” and that I needed to grow up. I was almost 18, and I had, just not the way HE wanted, I guess...

Godzilla 2000 came out. Dad grudgingly took mom and me to see it, and I finally got to live my dream of seeing a legit Toho Godzilla movie in theaters. I was yelling and clapping (as were other people) and just had a huge blast. In the car, he told me to knock it off when I talked excitedly about what I liked in the movie. He slapped down all talk of Godzilla.

I still continued to be a fan. When more Millennium era movies came out, I grabbed them when I saw them on the shelves. I got everything from Godzilla vs Megaguirus to Godzilla: Final Wars in a little Japanese shop my dad found near where he worked at the time. I was in my early 20s then. I also got some figurines from that store: a Heisei era Mothra, a Heisei era King Ghidorah and a Millenium era (Final Wars) Godzilla. Dad rolled his eyes when I walked out with them in my arms.

And so began his weird pattern of indulging my interest, but getting upset at me if I talked about it. I was discovering the online fandom at this point, so I had another outlet, but still, it used to be our thing, and his behavior really stung.

I only discovered there were more movies in the Millenium era becuse I happened across GMK on HBO and realized I didn’t recognize that Godzilla suit or the setting.

Then I missed the ending because of a very badly timed phone call. But I was like “omg more Godzilla movies...hey dad, can we go to that shop?” (And then I was like a dragon with treasure when I came home....)

I grabbed the two Kiryu movies first because a certain fanfic author in the fandom had written some Mechagodzilla fanfics where Kiryu (Kiryuu in her stories) was sentient and sexy af. The idea of the original Godzilla being brought back as a robot was amazing and that author basically took the idea and ran it to another level. She’s the reason I headcanon the 54 Gojira as Heisei Godzilla’s dad.

ANYWAY, I got all caught up on the Godzilla movies and blew up to a boiling fan girl froth when the 2014 movie got advertised.

I took mom to see that becuse dad’s Parkinson’s had advanced so far that he couldn’t go out much anymore. Mom likes Godzilla movies and sci-fi in general. While she’s not as into it as me, she enjoys them for the entertainment. We both liked G2014, so I got it for Christmas.

We watched it with dad as a family, he said it was okay.

Through 2016 and 2017 I was rattling on about Shin Godzilla. Got that as a late 37th birthday gift because it came out on dvd a few days after my actual birthday. I watched it for the first time with dad, and he complained the whole time and kind of ruined the experience for me, which pissed me off. HE was the one who wanted to watch it with me, now I wish I watched it alone instead.

2019 came, KOTM happened. So that brings me to sitting down to watch it with dad. I was excited see his reaction to the monsters he introduced me to in childhood realized with modern cgi effects and all. I love seeing things that remind me of happy times in my childhood, and I thought those memories were fond for him, too. So I watched, waiting for him to recognize Mothra, Rodan and King Ghidorah.

He said nothing when they came onscreen. I got engrossed in the movie and sort of forgot about it, but when it was over I bounced up and asked, “Wasn’t it cool to see the guys you told me stories about when I was 5?”

I thought back while I waited for him to answer. I thought back on the stories, the fun and the movies.

I thought back on how my love for this character has grown, and how in KOTM it was physically realized in that painful moment when Ishiro Serizawa looks up at Godzilla with such reverence and lays his hand on his snout. I feel like that was Dougherty telling all the fans he sees their love for Godzilla and gives them that one singular, intimate audience with the big guy through Serizawa. Because who wouldn’t want to give him a pat on the nose and thank him?

The director of KOTM understands what Godzilla means to the fans. He understands how they feel and what they want. In my mind he gave it in spades.

But my dad...

My dad, the man who taught me enough to get me into Godzilla forever, looked at me in the eyes and said, “I don’t remember any of it. They’re not that important anyway.”

“These are important characters.” Much younger dad said to much younger me.

“They’re not that important anyway.” Older modern day dad said to older modern day me.

I thought my heart had stopped and my soul fled through the floor. This franchise, these characters he brought to me with such enthusiasm, something that grew into a lifelong love, meant nothing to him. It was as if he gave me a diamond and later told me it was worthless glass to him. Godzilla was and still is a huge part of my life and who I am, and dad acted like this “us” thing I thought we bonded over during my childhood didn’t matter to him.

It’s almost like he expected me to take passing interest and then move on, but because I’m autistic and because I relate to Godzilla so much, my interest turned into love and respect for the character, what he represents and the messages he has sent throughout the years.

Part of who I am is shaped, literally, by Godzilla, something that started because my dad told me he existed. And in a sentence my dad took that root from my childhood and ripped it out because he decided it was a worthless weed.

It’s not my love for Godzilla that was ripped out. It’s the love I thought my dad felt for me when he was telling me all those stories and showing me the movies. I’m sharing this because I love Godzilla, because I love what he represents and means to me, and I thought my dad shared it with me for the same reason. This is a very autistic thing...I’m sure autistic readers can feel my love for Godzilla just by reading this.

I thought my dad did, too, once.

But no. There was no love at all like I thought there was, so I was not pouring my love into an ocean that still existed, I was throwing it into a black hole.

Dad didn’t care to remember Rodan, or Mothra, or King Ghidorah. He didn’t care to remember what all that meant to me during my childhood because he doesn’t and never has cared about my feelings.

He doesn’t care about my feelings.

He wants me to shut up about Godzilla.

I will not.

I love Godzilla. I don’t need dad’s approval anymore. I will turn 40 this year (2020) and there is no stopping what began 35 years ago. The plant that grew around the root dad planted is shaped like me now, and like Biollante I will keep blooming because Godzilla was my first love fandom-wise and that admiration and love for him stands on its own.

Dad no longer has a say.

But, my God, my dad has this remarkable ability to tell me something is important when I’m young and then claim it isn’t so many years later. He’s done it for a lot of things, but hearing him say Godzilla isn’t important after instilling his importance into me at a young age just...gutted me...and it gutted me as much as the time he asked me what I did to make kids bully me when I was being bullied as a teen.

I got bullied because I’m autistic. I existed. He said it was my fault for being that way. I was a newly diagnosed teenager when he said that. It was 1995, ironically, the same year Godzilla vs Destroyah came out.

And I was an adult when he ripped at that root of Godzilla he planted in me.

Godzilla was the last part of my childhood that he hadn’t sunk his abuse into, but he finally did in January of 2020. Now there is no part of my life untouched by his emotionally abusive crap.

It shouldn’t hurt like this. I feel ridiculous to be hurt so deeply, but I can’t keep pretending that I’m not hurt by it anymore.

I will get over it. My absolute love and respect for Godzilla is something my dad can never destroy no matter how much he tries to shit talk about it. I’ve let him ruin so many things, but not Godzilla.

Godzilla will never be a trigger for me. He is an anti trigger. On this day of April 19, 2020, I’m realizing he is the protector my dad failed to be.

To all parents of autistic kids, be careful that you don’t belittle the things you said were important when they were young. Don’t introduce something that becomes a special interest, say it’s important and then belittle it when they grow up.

Even if you don’t think it’s important anymore now, even if you think it’s silly now, even if you didn’t know they were autistic at the time and would dive in like that, it may still be important to them.

It may become their safe place. It may become treasure.

Don’t try to destroy that safety. Don’t treat it like trash.

#actuallyautistic #special interest #godzilla #emotional abuse #gaslighting #dad issues #swearing #ableism #gifs #long post #tw emotional abuse #tw gaslighting

[hopeatermeetsgodzilla]

Chapter 19

“Sir?” Jonah raised his head from his computer, frowning as he saw Emily. The young woman seemed worried about something. “May I come in?”

He softened his face a bit. “Of course.” Emily nodded, coming into the room and sitting down in front of her boss’ desk. Jonah took his hands away from the keyboard, folding them over his desk. “What’s wrong? Are you afraid Monarch knows of our headquarters’ position?”

“No! No, it’s not about that.” Following Florès’ exposing of their takeover of Outpost 32 to the military, the Titan Liberation Front had had to leave in an emergency, coming back to their base in Boston. It had quickly been followed by Emily doing a quadruple check of the security system.

The only trace from Florès she had found was an encoded message on a Word document that hadn’t been there before.

Remember, Jonah doesn’t trust you...

“Well then, what is it about?”

“... are you sure waking all the Titans is the way to go?” Emily asked, frowning. When Jonah narrowed his eyes, she quickly tried to correct herself. “I-I mean I know they’re the only ones who can save the planet at this point and that not waking them would just delay the inevitable, b- but what if when we free all of them, we end up regressing back to the Stone Age-”

“Emmy.” Jonah suddenly cut her off. She flinched away. Emmy was a nickname her parents had given her before they had died. Jonah was pretty much the only person close to her who was still allowed to use it. “Why are you so worried? Humanity going back to a time were they held no impact on the planet is an ideal scenario.”

“I- it’s not just about that... it’s Ghidorah.” She started. “It’s- they’re not from Earth, they’re not going to restore the planet- they’re destroying it- it’s not going to be the co-existence you told me about, they’re a walking extinction event-”

“Kane.” Jonah started, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “Are you telling me you’re having second doubts now? You were fine with millions of people dying, but you’re going to draw the line at billions of people dying?”

“That’s not what I said-”

“If we’re a sickness,” Jonah started, circling his desk, “and the Earth Titans are a fever, then Ghidorah is both the cure and the vaccine. It doesn’t matter what our intentions are: what’s important is that humans won’t be able to rise up again once they’re done, and the planet will only benefit from it. Do you understand?”

“... yes, sir.”

 “And if we do live to see this mass extinction event through...” He placed his hand on Emily’s shoulder, making her flinch. “I trust you and your talents will help us out, yes?” Jonah smiled down reassuringly at her, patting her shoulder.

... And you shouldn’t trust him.

Emily hesitantly nodded, remembering the message Florès had left her. “O- of course, sir.”

-

“You want me to teach you how to absorb energy?” Rodan nodded, San turning away from the coast to look at him instead, still not getting up. The sun was starting to set, and Ghidorah had made it very clear they were fascinated with the sky and the objects in it. There was also the fact they drew most of their energy from it. “Any reason why this sprang up?”

“I’m having difficulties finding food, and your brother mentioned you could teach me how to do it.” Rodan explained, sitting down and craning his neck up to look at San. “Something about being more spiritual.”

San nodded. “That is true. Ichi’s too clinical, and Ni convinced himself that if he allows himself to be vulnerable, he’ll die.” There was a pause. “Either way, neither can meditate if I’m not here. Can you absorb energy on your own, like, consciously?”

“Not consciously, I just start doing it automatically the moment I submerge myself in lava.”

“Partially, or fully?”

“Both. The more I’m submerged, the easier it is.”

San nodded. “Alright, that means you’re the unconscious type. We’re gonna try to meditate, okay? Okay. I want you to close your eyes, and breath in a pattern: 4 seconds in, 4 seconds hold, 8 seconds out. You think you can do it?”

“Yeah, I’m not an idiot.” Rodan hissed out, San giggling to himself before closing his eyes. Rodan watched the taller one do it a few times, before attempting himself. He started taking a deep breath. 1, 2- Heat, too much heat, feathers burned off, scalp burning, sides of mouth splitting, veins bursting, eyes burning, heart burning, too much light, no noise, nothing, lost everything-

“Hey, hey.” Rodan opened his eyes, craning his neck up to look at San. The blond had a worried look on his face. “You weren’t able to get it in. What went wrong?”

“I felt like I was burning from the inside out.” Rodan wheezed out in a shaky tone, before stopping and taking a moment to gather himself. When he spoke again, his voice was steadier. “Am I supposed to feel like I’m losing control of my powers?”

“You’re not. Probably. I don’t feel like I’m getting struck by lightning when I meditate, but I do feel like I’m floating... You said you felt like you were burning, right...?” San seemed to think for a moment, before holding his hands out. “Take my hands.”

“... alright?” Rodan hesitantly put his hands in San’s. He shuddered. Apparently, the cold from the ice had seeped into their very being. It felt as if frost spread were his hands touched San’s. Long fingers curled around his hands, and he shivered as he felt a shock run through his body.

“If you start feeling too hot again, focus on my hands, alright?” Rodan nodded, closing his eyes again as he took a deep breath. 1, 2- liquid fire in his lungs, in his heart, can’t breath, can’t talk, all alone- he squeezed San’s hands, all cold and long fingers and letting off small shocks each time they moved- shaky 3, steady 4. He opened one eye as they held their breath in, but quickly closed it again when he saw San’s were still closed. He let it out, and San giggled. “See? You did it!”

“Y- yeah.” Rodan couldn’t help but blush. “I guess I did. What now?”

“We continue. Try to find your own rhythm. I’ll follow you.” Rodan nodded, resuming the exercise as they slowly adapted to his own breathing- which was more along the lines of 5,3,8. He could practically hear his own heart beating, how the magma flowed in his veins. Slowly everything seemed to fade away, the only thing left being the hands he held. “Rodan?”

“Mmm?”

“Open your eyes.” Rodan carefully opened one eye, before looking around in confusion.

They weren’t on Mara anymore. The sky had become whirls of color he couldn’t put a name on, and the ground a flat expense of white sand covered by a thing layer of water. Thousands upon thousands of stars filled the sky. Rodan blinked in confusion. “What the...?”

“What, first trip to the Soul Realm?” Rodan turned toward San, and screamed in surprise, letting go of his hands. Instead of San, there was now a vaguely San-shaped golden floaty thing in front of him, three pairs of round white eyes staring at him.

“Wh- San!?” He exclaimed in surprise, the spirit nodding. “What happened? Where are we? Where did Mara go? Why do you look like that-”

“One question at a time, okay? First, we’re meditating. This is what happens when you successfully separate your soul from your body. This is the Soul Realm, or the place between life and death. Mara didn’t go anywhere, in fact our bodies are still on it, alive and soaking in energy. And I look like that because that’s what my soul is like.”

Rodan groaned. “Great. And I thought the moth’s whole deal was weird...”

San giggled. “Don’t be like that, fire bird. I mean, look at you! You’re practically wrapped in fire!”

“What are you talking about- woah!” Rodan looked at his hands. His sleeves had been replaced by feathers of fire, dragging after him like a train as he got up. He slowly moved his arms, watching the flames move in synch.

He slowly started laughing, running around in circles and watching the fire around him grow larger, brighter, encompassing him. He distantly registered San laughing along or telling him to spin as he danced around, but he complied anyway, flames growing with each gleeful pirouette he did.

“You’re even brighter than the precious Fire guardian!” Rodan came to a halt at that, the flow of flames around him dying. San tilted his head at that, Round eyes becoming ovals in an imitation of confusion. “What’s wrong?”

“... Quetz had similar flames?”

“Oh yeah!” San cheerfully said, seemingly obvious to Rodan’s distress. “She was really something to behold. A bloodlust that nearly rivals Ni’s, a flawless defense in her attack, and a passion-”

“-That shined brighter than the sun could ever hope to.” Rodan finished, his voice breaking a bit on that.

San tilted his head in curiosity. “... are you sure you’re alright? Each time the former Guardian of fire comes up, you get really sad.” Rodan said nothing, simply maintaining his lack of eye contact. “With how you and your people’s hierarchy work, I thought you’d be happy about a runt like you getting close to the top of the food chain-”

Rodan’s flames flared up again, this time in anger as he screeched. “WHY WOULD I BE HAPPY ABOUT MY MATE DYING-” The flame went back to a smolder as he realized in horror what he had just blurted out. There was no way they wouldn’t try to use that against him-

San looked impassive, but what he said sounded... horrified? “You... your mate died and you ended up taking her place!?”

“I- I don’t know why it happened either-” Rodan started, the pent-up frustration and anxiety and despair that had accumulated and festered over the years starting to come out as yellow flames started surrounding them. “It’s just- we were trying to start a family and one of the attempts finally took- and before I knew it the volcano we nested in erupted and we lost the eggs and I lost a wing and she choked on the smoke and I tried to join them but Terra wouldn’t let me die-”

Rodan came to a halt as he felt two hands come up to his face. San was looking down at him, all three pair of eyes narrowed. “How cruel.” He blankly stated. “Instead of letting you join her, your god- Terra, is it?- has decided to throw her death right in your face by making you her successor... are you not angry at her?”

Rodan grabbed San by the wrists, taking his hands away from his face. “Why do you care? It’s not like you ever lost anyone dear to you.”

“I have, actually.” Rodan’s eyes widened in surprise. He would’ve called bullshit, but something about San when he said it made him seem more... vulnerable. “Back when we lived in space. He often helped us, we had similar point of views, and he was very fun to be around. A bit similar to you, really. Losing him so suddenly is what drove us to come here.”

“Oh.” Rodan took a hold of San’s hand, squeezing reassuringly. “I’m so sorry for your loss... was his death brutal, or... ?”

“Oh, he didn’t die, firebird.” San started ominously, standing to his full height. “He betrayed us.”

“W- what?” Rodan’s eyes widened in horror. As far as he was concerned, once mated, you essentially pledged your very being to that person. And while a relationship between mates could die if given enough time, betraying them before breaking off was never an option. “Why would he do that!?”

“Weaker beings are afraid of what they don’t understand, and we are very hard to understand.” San stated, his voice back to it’s dissonant cheerfulness. “I mean, I’m very sure you’ve seen quite a few humans who didn’t like Titans and wanted them dead-”

Rodan didn’t process what came out of San’s mouth next. He was too focused by his arms breaking off, separated from his shoulders by tiny black, pointy sticks. He opened his mouth to scream, only for more sticks to lodge themselves in his lips and throat, chocking off any sounds that would come out of it. As those sticks started tearing into his chest, is vision went blurry, the entire world around him melding in a sick spiral of colors, gold at it’s center.

“Rodan!? RODAN! OPEN YOUR EYES!!!” Rodan opened his eyes, eyes turned to the ground and whole body shaking as he hyperventilated. He was back in the real world. ‘Hey, hey, it’s fine, you’re fine, there’s no danger- Look at me.” He slowly looked up. The light of the mostly set sun was casting strange, moving shadows on San, his glowing red eyes amplifying the strangeness of his sharp features. “What’s wrong?”

“C- Can’t breath-”

San frowned. “Breath, then.” He sang, his voice echoing onto itself.

Rodan didn’t know why he wasn’t ignoring the Ghidorah’s songs. Hell, they were the whole reason he had built up his immunity to all Calls, thanks in no small part to hanging out with Godzilla so much. But that didn’t mean he didn’t feel the pull of it. And he was too shaken to not listen right now. He took in a large gulp of air, breathing in short, quick bursts as San held onto his hands.

“Do you want to talk about what that was about?” San asked, tilting his head. Rodan shook his head. Revealing his relationship with Quetzalcoatl could’ve gone wrong very fast, and he attributed San having someone similar to a pure stroke of luck on his part. There was no way Ghidorah could’ve ever been hurt by beings so much smaller and weaker than them. He hoped the other wouldn’t push it.

But San just nodded, letting go of Rodan’s hands and gently bending forward as his breathing calmed down. It’s then he realized. “It worked.”

San blinked in confusion. “Uh?”

“The meditation, it worked!” Rodan cheerfully exclaimed, pushing his earlier thoughts in a corner of his mind. “I feel stronger then befo-”

“Rodan.”

“GAH!” Rodan turned his head, only to see Ni staring down at him and San. “I told you not to sneak up on me like that!”

Ni simply shrugged in indifference. “You’ll get used to it.”

“Oh, hi Ni!” Ni nodded at San, before kneeling down, facing Rodan.

“I found something you might like.” Ni told him, handing him a handful of something. Rodan’s eyes widening in surprise when he realized it was a handful of small roots, nuts and grains. “You told me you couldn’t eat the fish around the island anymore, so I tried to find something you could eat in the human settlement. It’s not a lot, but it should be better than rotten fish.”

Rodan smiled, bringing the handful of food to his mouth and swallowing. He then turned toward Ni, his face glowing a bit. “And it is. Thank you, Ni.”

Ni frowned, bringing a hand to Rodan’s face. “Are you sure you’re fine? Blood keeps rushing to your face.”

That snapped Rodan out of his relaxed state of mind. He jumped up, the flush growing bigger as he did so. “Of course I’m fine, whywouldntIbefine-”

“Rodan, it’s fine, sit down-”

“AnywayitsgettinglateandIneedtosleepgoodnight!” Rodan exclaimed, followed by a strong wind that carried him off to the top of his volcano. Ni and San could see his silhouette collapse at the top of it, followed by a strange, quiet shriek.

San turned toward his brother, smiling. “Good idea to find him food!”

Ni blinked. “I didn’t think my efforts to make him like me were working.” When San gave him a confused frown, he shrugged. “Each time I try to be nice to him, he keeps getting... flustered. Embarrassed. That’s not a good thing.”

“... He’s touched.” San blankly stated. “You keep giving him gifts, Ni. Of course he’s gonna keep blushing.”

“How did you figure out he needed food?” The two turned toward Ichi, who they knew had been watching them for a time.

San waved as their older brother sat down. “Hi brother Ichi!”

“He... told me?” Ni tried hesitantly. “It’s why I told him to talk to San. So he could learn to absorb energy without soaking himself in lava. Help him stay not weak.”

Ichi nodded. “Either way, good job. The both of you.” Ni sighed in relief and San beamed at the praise. His good mood only improved as Ichi pat him on the head. “If we continue like that, we’ll be out of this place sooner than later.”

#writing #My writing #Godzilla #godzilla gijinka #gijinka #emmy kano #alan jonah #Rodan #ghidorah #King Ghidorah #san ghidorah #ni ghidorah #ichi ghidorah #kevin ghidorah #rodorah

[monochrome-monarch]

Atlantis Days AU/Ghidorah Pulls An Anakin AU

Is it even considered an AU?

Anyway, I watched some GMK clips and two Wikizilla videos on GMK Mothra, Ghidorah and Baragon then I thought, "Hey, they should do these 'KG as the good guy scenarios' more often." which then turned into "What if Ghidorah was a good guy (read: morally ambiguous but not evil) back in the day but pulled an Anakin Skywalker?"

Then these designs happened:

Some notes on this AU(?) Warning: canon divergence probably

- Everyone is younger here. Like I guess college age by Titan standards?? If we're talking who's the eldest and who's the youngest, well, Eldest is tied between the Ghidorah Triplets and Mothra but no one knows how old Ghidorah is (they're still considered young by their planet's standards, though) and Mothra and Rodan take turns being the youngest, mostly thanks to Mothra dying and coming back.

- Dagon is the Alpha of this time period and Gojira is his heir. They are not related but they do have a familial mentor-student relationship. Dagon /probably/ would've adopted Goji had he lived longer

- Mothra is sorta Dagon's daughter?? They're close friends and he plays parent whenever Mothra is reborn as a larva. Okay, maybe she /is/ his daughter.

- Rodan is Dagon's foster son, taking him in after his entire flock got slaughtered by something. Rodan's parents also took in Dagon's son (yep, Dagon is the biological father of BabyG) since I sorta headcanon that Alphas trust someone to be the surrogate/foster parent of their young and well, Rodan's parents were kinda suited for the job since they're loyal to Dagon, are great fighters and no one is dumb enough to invade a nest situated in a volcano. As thanks for their service and also out of pity, he took in Rodan (Did I explain that well??) Btw, the egg doesn't hatch until the Beginnings of the Mass Hibernation. Also, Rodan and Dagon have a good father-son relationship, even if Rodan sometimes likes to annoy Dagon.

- The Ghidorah Triplets are an anomaly, having fallen from the sky but, thanks to a really rough landing which resulted to bad head injuries, they have no memory of their life prior to their fall. They were initially taken in by Leviathan before being dumped on Orochi when they were a little older. Years later, Orochi then sent them to go train under Dagon and maybe figure out who they were. P.S. They eventually fo find out about their past. . . Their not so good and fun past. . . Which resulted in them going back to their conquering ways

- The six of them were actually close friends back in the day

•Gojira and the Triplets had a friendly rivalry going on, especially in terms of combat. However, the Ghidorahs are also pretty jealous on Goji being Dagon's heir but they don't know why (when they remember their past, they find out why)

• Goji and Rodan see each other as brothers but they also like messing with each other. Goji is usually the one that bails Rodan out and makes sure he doesnt get into too much trouble or even hurt while Rodan cheers Goji up and is usually there to back him up. They also have a habit of throwing tiny pebbles at each other.

• Mothra is everyone's mom friend but she surprisingly Moms the Ghidorahs the most, mostly because of their mysterious origins and their own individual flaws that will warrant them an asskicking (Ichi being an arrogant douche, Ni being irritable and quick-tempered but then again, he doesnt mind fighting everyone and San being too curious and not too bright). Ichi usually gets annoyed, Ni is indifferent at first but does get annoyed too while San doesn't mind. They secretly appreciate it, though

• Mothra still Moms Goji 'Too Tired for your BS but I will still kick your ass' and Rodan 'Will start a fist fight for kicks'. However, at least Goji helps her out by acting as Tired Dad friend though, Rodan does help. . . By fighting people. Also, to be fair, Goji ends up fighting people too but only if someone insults his friends, especially Mothra.

• Rodan and the Triplets are disaster friends who get into trouble a lot, usually them getting into brawls with others or with each other (to be fair, it's all in good fun in the latter case). Though, when they're not causing trouble, they're probably chilling at a temple or a tavern. Rodan has a different dynamic with each triplet but he's still close with all three of them.

- If Rodan or Dagon is busy, everyone takes turns watching over the Egg. Mothra is the most trusted for obvious reasons.

- Yes, Goji and Mosu have a crush on each other but are lowkey trying to egg the other into asking the other out. And no, neither of them have cracked yet. Yes, Rodan and Ghidorah have a crush on each other but they're hella confused. On Rodan's side, it's "Do I have a crush on one of them or all three of them??" While on the triplets' side, it's "WTF is this feeling???"

Design Notes:

- I headcanon Atlantis as a Melting Pot aka a lot of cultures and races integrate here and have a huge influence on the place hence the outfit influences. Also, you can totally see the D&D influences in some of the outfits.

- Mothra's outfit is based on one of the Shobijin's outfits, just a bit more suited for flying and being in a kingdom in the middle of the sea. I tried to make it as extra as possible, I swear. Surprisingly,the fluff coat doesnt get in the way of her wings

- Am I the only one who actually likes the idea of Rodan having feathers? Idk, it sounds cool. He doesn't have feathers when he's fighting, though. Also, thanks to his tail and the fact that his wing membrane is also connected to the said tail, Rodan wears low rise bottoms. Also also, he wears shorts under his kilt.

- Goji tends to prefer simpler clothes since he doesn't want any fancy stuff getting in the way of him swimming or mediating but he doesn't mind wearing fancy clothes, though. Yes, he also likes wearing his hakama like that. Mothra can be caught staring at it

- The Triplets were originally supposed to be dressed in Celtic Clothing before I decided for celtic-inspired fantasy clothes instead. It's just emphasize on how out of place they are on Earth. Also, their styles have some differences because people got fed up with trying to guess which brother is which. However, they were matching armor when training/fighting. San arguabling dresses more simpler, especially when he's out hunting. Wouldn't want to ruin your fancy clothes when out hunting.

- Their heights are as follows: Mothra is 5'5, Rodan is 6'0, Godzilla is 7'3 and Ghidorah is 7'5. Yes, the boys hit their heads on doorways, especially Ghids.

Will edit this if I change my mind or have more ideas. Also, feel free to ask me questions about this AU

Edit: Wording and spelling Errors

#godzilla #mothra #King Ghidorah #Rodan #this is what happens when I'm bored. dumb and trying to use what little free time I have #'San dresses simpler' I say as I draw San in fancy clothes #Rodan and Mothra are my favorites #also I love how I make Ni look like an Axe Murderer lol #Proud on how I did with Goji and Ichi too #especially Ichi's wings #also is Ghidorah planning on murdering the cameraman? Maybe #Also Mothra is looking at the camera I swear #Also I definitely encourage the Darth Vader Ghidorah jokes #Atlantis Days AU

[ckret2]

Which if any of the heisei movies has been your favorite so far? :D

I have now seen ALL the Heisei Godzilla movies.

And I’m like. I kinda wanna say “A non-exist movie made up of nothing but clips of Baby.” And by “Baby” I mean “at every age, up to and including through the moment he becomes the new Godzilla,” because his name will always be Baby to me I don’t care.

My little Ghidorah-loving heart wishes I could say Godzilla vs. King Ghidorah because, duh, King Ghidorah, and I basically ripped the dorats and Emmy Kano straight outta GvKG to stuff into my headcanon for MonsterVerse’s background. But like... the rest of it is such a hot mess. The weird-ass WW2 scene that was honestly kind of hysterical—imagining being some white dude in Japan and getting asked “hey do you wanna play an American solder in a WW2 battle scene and also get killed by Godzilla”—and the terrible, terrible time travel where they were like “yes we have prevented Godzilla from ever having existed” and yet everyone still remembers that Godzilla existed and there’s no evidence that anything about Japan changed due to the fact that it wasn’t getting periodically attacked by a giant radioactive dinosaur; and then suddenly King Ghidorah attacks and it’s like, look, if they dropped the dorats in the past to get mutated in place of Godzilla, then shouldn’t he have been attacking Japan since ‘54 when he got mutated, shouldn’t he at least have been spotted, like, at some point in the last thirty-odd years...

So I can’t say GvKG. To my regrets.

Like the second half of the movie is spectacular and just thinking about everything Ghid goes through rips my heart out but I can’t get over how fast and loose they play with their time travel paradoxes.

I think I’m gonna go with Vs Mechagodzilla II, because:

- Baby!! The babiest Baby- Godzillasaurus as nest parasites is inspired and I love it.- Rodan’s ready to give his life for his baby brother, even though his baby brother is another species, and also had been taken away before he even hatched. Like Rodan didn’t even know his brother but he was like “oh shit he’s a Godzilla? Guess I’m ready to die for him so that his own species can take care of him” like what kind of over-the-top selfless loyalty- Azusa Gojo exists and I’m so pissed they didn’t bring her back to fuss over Baby in future movies, like why did Miki become the one who cares about what happens to Baby, Azusa is his mom- that said tho I love Miki too. Miki and her, fucking, classroom of psychic children.- that one dude that was just so fucking stoked over pteranodons he’d do anything to get closer to them.- Godzilla has a second brain in his butt- the movie’s Happy Ending Scenario is “Godzilla defeats the humans” which tickles me- Also it tickles me that the first time G and MechaG fight, MechaG is just this fucker that comes outta nowhere and stands in Godzilla’s path like what must G be thinking about this big metal weirdo that looks like him. I mean he’s gonna fight it anyway but what’s going through his head.

There are parts of Biollante I really liked, and no single fight gripped me as hard as the final battle with Destoroyah—the brutality he put Baby through!—but for overall film it’s GvMG2.

#godzilla #soundwavereporting #ask

[dweemeister]

Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster (1964, Japan)

Godzilla’s introduction in 1954 enthralled and horrified Japanese moviegoers. That classic kaiju film, so filled with action and fantastical interest, introduced the Japanese to a monster also bearing the burdens of being a victim to something possible only in the nuclear age. Godzilla’s body is filled with keloid scars, meant to evoke the images of those who survived (if only for a time) the atomic blasts at Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Created in humanity’s pursuit of a civilization-destroying weapon, Godzilla is often interpreted as nature seeking payback against humanity. Despite Godzilla’s seeming desire for natural vengeance, Japanese audiences could empathize with Godzilla, recognizing the allegory that they had been living since 1945.

In the first four films in the Godzilla franchise and the Shôwa era of Godzilla (named after the concurrent Japanese Imperial era of Hirohito’s reign), Godzilla is an antagonist – wreaking havoc upon humanity, even when fighting other kaiju foes such as Anguirus (1955′s Godzilla Raids Again), King Kong (1962′s King Kong vs. Godzilla), and Mothra (1964′s Mothra vs. Godzilla). For Ishirô Honda’s Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster, Godzilla begins a rehabilitation of his image that will take three subsequent films to complete. When faced with an extraterrestrial threat to the planet, Godzilla will set aside his affray with Rodan (after both are persuaded by Mothra) to defeat King Ghidorah – who makes his cinematic debut with this film.

Princess Selina Salno (Akiko Wakabayashi) of Selgina is en route for an official visit to Japan in the midst of a winter heatwave. Just as her plane is destroyed by an assassin’s bomb, an enormous meteor impacts into the Japanese countryside near Kurobe Dam in Toyama Prefecture – considering that this same dam was destroyed by Mothra in 1961′s Mothra, all credit to the construction workers for their work in fixing the dam that quickly. Soon after, Princess Selina announces herself in the middle of a Tokyo crowd, news of her death greatly exaggerated. Claiming to be from Venus, she warns the public that Rodan – presumed dead at the end of his film debut in 1956 – will rise from Mt. Aso and that Godzilla, who has just battled Mothra in the previous movie, will destroy a ship. Away from the ears of the public, the gaze of assassins, and known only by bodyguard Detective Shindo (Yosuke Natsuki) and psychiatrist Dr. Tsukamoto (Takashi Shimura in his final Godzilla film appearance), she reveals a third prophecy. The final prophecy is prefaced by the fact that Selina’s Venusian civilization was destroyed by a three-headed dragon named King Ghidorah. She prophesies that he will attempt to destroy the Earth. Ghidorah, hailing from beyond our solar system, is the creature that emerges from the impacted meteor.

The evolving Godzilla franchise from Toho Company would soon face budget constraints and the artistic decision to make Toho’s most prized kaiju more family-friendly. Japan’s demographics in the late 1950s and early ‘60s skewed far younger than today – a time where the nation is now shrinking because of its rapidly aging population and low fertility rates. These considerations impact Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster narratively and aesthetically. Beginning with this film, Godzilla’s rampaging presence is a side effect to his ultimate defense of Japan, not an attempt to annihilate the Japanese. Nuclear allegories though mentionable to children, are likely to be beyond a child’s appreciation (in the neutral sense of the term). Thus, discussions of Godzilla’s origins and the morality of conflict against kaiju all but disappear in Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster. 

In earlier Godzilla films, the combat between monsters or between Godzilla and the Japanese Self-Defense Forces (JSDF; which does not bother getting in the way of Godzilla, Rodan, Mothra, and Ghidorah in this monstrous rumble) was portrayed as a battle between or against a titan. One can feel the weight of these enormous, lumbering (“lumbering” does not usually apply to flying beings, so Mothra should be excluded) kaiju trudging against the urban battlefields scorched by electric and nuclear fire. With Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster, Honda and kaiju actors Haruo Nakajima (Godzilla), Masanori Shinohara (Rodan), and Shoichi Hirose (King Ghidorah) approach violence as if it was professional wrestling – not the Greco-Roman or freestyle wrestling associated with the Olympics. There is even a ludicrous moment where Godzilla and Rodan are batting an enormous boulder between each other with the former’s fists and tail and the latter’s wings. All that is missing in this scene are a net and a chair umpire announcing the score. A new Godzilla suit was commissioned for this film, giving Nakajima the ability to more fully personalize his character through gestures and an off-camera technician to control the direction of Godzilla’s eyes in the sockets.

These results are jarring, contributing to the perceptions of the franchise’s campiness in later Shôwa era-Godzilla films. In the West until only recently, these Godzilla films were only available in dubbed versions – readers who are anime fans know how poor some of those English dubs of Japanese media can be. These films, at least in North America, were also extensively re-edited to emphasize the increasingly cartoonish battles between and against the kaiju. With thanks to Janus Films and the Criterion Collection, the original, unedited, subtitled versions of Shôwa era-Toho Company kaiju films are easily accessible for the first time. This review is based on the original unedited and subtitled version of Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster. Beware the dubbed version of this film, which runs eighty minutes (as opposed to the original’s ninety-two minutes). But even with the restoration of all of the scenes with those supposedly boring grown-ups talking about tiresome things, the tonal dissonance between the human- and kaiju-centric scenes combined with the combat choreography is bewildering.

Debuting in Japan as San daikaijû: Chikyû saidai no kessen (translated literally as: “Three giant monsters: Earth’s greatest battle”), this is a film underselling – at least, in its title – the genius of the antagonist. Special effects wizard Eiji Tsuburaya (a co-creator of Godzilla) visualizes a serpentine dragon with, you guessed it, three heads. But to complicate things, Ghidorah also has two tails and wings – seven appendages in total. To keep all seven in motion as Ghidorah flies across screen, Honda and Tsuburaya utilized several wires (somehow, almost none of them are ever on-screen) and a handful of puppeteers to keep Ghidorah in realistic animation, even when he – screeching at Godzilla and Rodan – has his feet planted on the ground. Unlike Haruo Nakajima as Godzilla and Masanori Shinohara as Rodan, Shoichi Hirose cannot use his arms as Ghidorah. So where his fellow kaiju actor counterparts could keep their balance by maneuvering their arms, Hirose is left with no option other than to position his feet correctly and hope for the best. Future iterations of Ghidorah would look even more impressive than this first attempt. With this striking introduction into the Godzilla series (with a lower-string-heavy motif by longtime Godzilla composer Akira Ifukube... starting at 0:49 in the provided link), Ghidorah’s emergence begins the greatest rivalry in kaiju cinema.

Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster, for unknown reasons, was never released theatrically in many European countries. That makes it, outside of Japan and North America, one of the lesser-known films in the Toho Studios’ kaiju canon. The film is also, in addition to Mothra vs. Godzilla, the inauguration of – dare we say it – one of the earliest cinematic universes (and certainly one of the most sprawling). How the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) is acclaimed for being so narratively innovative escapes me, especially given the financial and logistical realities of studio filmmaking in 1950s/1960s Japan and the 2010s in the United States. Even when fighting against the ill-informed wishes of producers and executives, the directorial vision is almost always apparent in these Godzilla films, including Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster. The same cannot be written for numerous other cinematic universes and their respective films.

In the halls of Toho throughout the 1960s and into the ‘70s, one of Godzilla’s creators was becoming unsettled by the requests of the company’s executives. As the director who brought Godzilla to being, Ishirô Honda insisted that Godzilla be seen as a figure warning against the folly of nuclear war. The increasing demands to make Godzilla a character engage in human-like behaviors and have identifiable human emotions fit perfectly with what some social critics saw as the infantilization of Japanese audiences because of the arrival of popular Japanese television. Honda – who essentially created the kaiju film, the monster film, and the disaster film – is an underappreciated figure in cinema whose legacy is undergoing a rapid reevaluation because of the fact that the Shôwa era kaiju films (in their original unedited and subtitled forms) are being made widely available outside Japan for the first time.

Nevertheless, after Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster, the pendulum would swing exactly the way Honda never wanted to witness. Honda would not live to see it, but I think he would have appreciated the fact that the pendulum has swung back.

My rating: 6.5/10

^ Based on my personal imdb rating. Half-points are always rounded down. My interpretation of that ratings system can be found here.

#Ghidorah the Three Headed Monster #Ishiro Honda #Godzilla #Mothra #Rodan #King Ghidorah #Yosuke Natsuki #Hiroshi Koizumi #Yuriko Hoshi #Takashi Shimura #Haruo Nakajima #Masanori Shinohara #Shoichi Hirose #Shinichi Sekizawa #Akira Ifukube #Eiji Tsuburaya #kaiju cinema #TCM #My Movie Odyssey

[abitterlifethroughcinema]

WOKE! Film Reviews in BCN

The Summer 2019 Movie Season Kick-Off!

by Lucas Avram Cavazos

Cue DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince! When I was coming of age in the 90s and early millennium, there were moment of sheer relief, joy even, as June broke through with certain heat in tow, that the summer would be bringing with it a break from the reality of non-stop scholastic rigamarole, as well as, a load of blockbuster films and some hot dance jams of the summertime. It was also usually ushered in by the Entertainment Weekly annual summer movie preview, but who gets magazine subscriptions nowadays? What we do get is down to business, so let’s roll!

Men In Black International ##-1/2

The first MIB film was released just as I made that high school to uni transition, and over two decades later, we start the 2019 summer movie season with this fourth instalment of what may have easily been put out to pasture long ago, but why stop when there is profit to be had, right? The charming sense of wonder that was first introduced to us back in ’97 was even served up back then with a now no longer Fresh Prince, but instead a mediocre hip-pop Will Smith single…oh the 90s. The thing is, that first film came across as right on time. Remember, this was at the height of paranormal entertainment, as the X-Files ruled the telly waves, alien movies started being produced in spades and pretty much everything commenced a somewhat pre-millennium tension, so setting a comedy/action thriller based on the tracking and maintaining of aliens in modern NYC society was a perfect, cinematic fit. In 2019, we now get the “int’l” version of MIB, where Agents H and B come poised like action figures in the skins of Thor:Ragnarok alums Chris Hemsworth and Tessa Thompson. They have been given the specific job of playing escorts to one of H’s old alien buddies who is a bigwig now and visiting Earth in search of a grand old time…cute. And then it becomes clear that old homeboy is also in possession of a diamond-sized weapon that could be a seismic shift to life as we know it and other evil forces want this for their possession too and la di da di da….It’s all been so overdone before, and I abhor seeing Miley Cyrus’ bro-in-law making such trite shite when, despite the obvious camaraderie between him and Lady Agent B, of which there is suspiciously mucho, when the script by three different writers is so obviously lacklustre, where is one to go from there? I digress but while it’s fun to see director F. Gary Gray do his attempt at dealing with alien life forms and shape-shifting cretins with a glossy sheen of comedy, if there is such real substance, how can you make a tired series shoot back to life? Answer: NOT LIKE THIS!

Aladdin ###-1/2

Disney’s consistent, modern renderings of animated classics into live-action, blockbuster behemoths continues with Guy Ritchie’s take on this undoubted classic from 1992 remade for #metoo 2019. While it may seem odd to not give the task to an Indian or Arab director, Ritchie takes on the task with aplomb that even gives this version a, dare I even say it, a woke feel to a story that truly should not be lily-white. Original Broadway star of Aladdin and TV’s Jack Ryan star Mena Massed nails it just as annoyingly as Robbie Benson did back in the day as the titular character, and although Indan-English actress Naomi Scott is a tad meh in her role, she also employs a fresh sense of independent woman ‘tude that vibrates through the celluloid and scenery despite the paint-by-numbers songs. But, let’s be frank, it’s beyond time that a production so perfectly timed and so immense in this modern time should and would have POC actors painting a picture of those times, so it comes to no surprise that Ritchie would want a big name star like Will Smith to embody the role left so perfectly-tinged with greatness like the cartoon original voiced by the late, great Robin Williams. Guess what? He does the role very fine justice…thankfully. And he does it in a classic, Fresh Prince vibe…smoothly and with easy aplomb. I also found the choices of lady-in-waiting Nasim Pedrad as Dahlia and Marwan Kenzari as the cruel Jafar as impeccably cast worthy…timely comic and story relief. Gone, however, is the annoyingly necessary voice of evil parrot sidekick Iago by Gilbert Gottfried and instead is a guy with a bird-like tone. Only time will tell if this particular film piece stands the test of time as I believe The Jungle Book and latter Beauty and the Beast will, but after the ho-hum taste of MIB Int’l, I’ll take this eye-spectacle anyway!

Godzilla: King of the Monsters ##-1/2

In this new addition to the decades-old franchise, our infamous title character gets to slug it against a foe out on the field at Fenway Park…fun! For years now, dino and/or Godzilla movies have consistently littered the summer movie theatres for more than a couple of decades now. Godzilla: King of the Monsters is a sequel to the last 2014 eyesore, which was released just before I began critiquing cinema, so right off the bat, the film  commences with a throwback to the drama where the other film left us and we get paleo-biologist and mum Emma Russell (Vera Famiga of The Conjuring and Bates Motel fame) tethered to her adorable one Madison (Stranger Things star Mille Bobby Brown) as they gaze in awe at the apparent nascence of a larva named Mothra. This kaiju movie (entertainment that employs the use of oversized combative creatures) happens to present us with the fact that Godzilla is a supposed ringleader of the Titans, which are huge, dormant creatures ensconced beneath the earth…you know the ones, Rodan, the aforementioned Mothra, Monarch, something called Monster Zero…oh and don’t forget that Monster Zero is also called Ghidora, and if you’re not confused yet, let me give you another interesting summer movie fact…this film also stars Sally Hawkins of The Shape of Water and Blue Jasmine success and king of character actors and John Sayles movies David Strathairn as some admiral. My qualm comes down to this…if this is the shlocky summer stuff Hollywood is going to be throwing at us for the next three months, we’ve got a long way to go, and I’m going to have to apply some indie skills real fast because watching so many good actors put to mediocre use is not the way to start off the summer! Here’s to hoping.

#abitterlifethroughcinema #men in black international #chris hemsworth #TessaThompson #IWantToBelieve #Aladdin #guy ritchie #menamoussad #NaomiScott #Disney #Godzilla #sally hawkins #vera farmiga #millie bobby brown #woke! #theclubwithlucas #EnglishRadioBCN #local #Barcelona #global #cinema #VOSEng #GetOverYourself #loveTRUTH

[quinnmorgendorffer]

1, 10, 20, 30, 40, 50, 60, 70, 80, 90, 100

1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? 

I really don’t use any of them haha. But I guess Spotify the most but I miss Pandora, man. I liked hearing new songs based on things I like...maybe I’ll try them again? Haha

10. how would you describe your style?

Whatever fits lol. I like all kinds of things, but I really want to get more boho sort of things lol

20. how tall are you?

5′11″ or so, maybe only 5′10″

30. whats your favorite candle scent? 

I love my Christmas pine needle candles :D

40. how many times have you been to the hospital?

For myself? Well I’ve had three surgeries at hospitals - elbow surgery after I broke it, gallbladder removal, and sinus/deviated septum surgery - and then I went to the ER 3 times for the gallbladder before it was diagnosed, one time I had a panic attack sort of thing and thought it was a stroke lmao and then twice this past year because I couldn’t find urgent cares that took my insurance. So.........9 times?

50. what was the last text you sent?

A heart emoji to my bae Sam :)

60. how many pictures do you have on your phone? 

Lmao I don’t delete things so if everything is in my camera roll (idk if that’s how it works?), 8,854 D:

70. what was the last concert you saw? 

I saw some Stravinsky at the Symphony!!!!!!! Petrushka, his Violin Concerto, and THE RITE OF SPRING!!!!!!!!

80. what is your biggest pet peeve?

I hate the sound of cracking knuckles/joints oh my GOD. And I hate when I say that, people automatically do it!

90. do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?

Both. But I use Rodan and Fields Sooth most days and since my skin is dry, it’s really just a cream cleanser that I blot off, I don’t wash it. But I use their anti-aging stuff once every other day or so, and that’s a facial mask that you have to wash off

100. who was the last person you cried in front of? 

My roommate. It’s been a tough few weeks :/. But I was also tearing up this morning over the final Bohemian Rhapsody trailer this morning and she was there so that counts too haha

thanks for asking babe you’re the best

#long post #brastrangled #bite me in the ask

[beatgees]

Veterinarians On Socialization Classes for Kittens

A kitty ’s head is a terrible thing to waste.  “It all started when my clients in puppy classes desired equivalent attention to their cats,” says Dr. Kersti Seksel, a veterinary behaviorist at Seaforth, New South Wales, Australia.  “Kittens deserve an education too. ” So, about a decade ago, she started offering what she called Kitty Kindy.  The 1 hour to 90 minute class meets twice and is exclusively for kitties seven to 14 weeks. “I’ve had cats my whole life, and haven't heard of anything so ridiculous,” says a manager of a pet shop in Madison, Wis. “It's ’s a concept for yuppies who have nothing else to do. ” To be sure, he’s not the only person who thinks this way.

A few years back, Dr. Illona Rodan heard about Seksel’s tutoring for tabbies; she immediately imported the program from Down Under to her feline clinic in Madison.  “that I ’m sure people thought I was a bit crazy,” she states.  “But I understood these courses would save lives.  The number one cause of death in indoor cat’s isn’t heart or kidney disease or cancer, it’s people who give up on their cats’ bad behaviour. ”

Surprisingly, Rodan had no issue registering feline students.

“I learned how to instruct Jasper to fetch,” proudly borrows James Schuelke, a 27-year old mill worker in Madison who took the class in the fall of 2003.

Even though he says Jasper’s since forgotten how to fetch, Schuelke says that he ’s happy he went to kitty class.  “I learned about why you shouldn’t play with your cats using your fingers. ”

“It may be cute if they’re little kittens, but it’s not so cute when an adult cat is biting hard on your palms,” instructs Angela Martin Licari, a certified veterinary technician who shares the teaching responsibilities with Rodan.

Veterinary behaviorist Dr. Karen Overall, a researcher in the psychiatry department at the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine, Philadelphia, Pa.says, “Allow me to share a tragic fact that understand one talks about; countless cats don’t receive the kind of physical exam they should.  In fact, cats don’t, on average, don’t see the vet as often as puppies. ”

Signs of cardiovascular disease in cats are a murmur and rapid heart beat.  When a cat is traumatized, there’s no way to determine what the true heart rate is to hear a murmur.  Vets have to guess if high blood pressure is a consequence of stress or whether it’s a symptom of underlying disease.  In the same way, the wall off blood glucose levels may be a indication of diabetes, but might also be due to the ordeal of visiting the vet.

Typically, those Kitty Kindy’s take place in a vet office.  Seksel says, “At this young age, all you need to do is shed some treats at the carrier.  Kittens are happy to jump indoors.  Now, a visit to the vet office is similar to a party; there are treats and toys, and other cats to play with. ”

Rodan, who's also a past president of the American Association of Feline Practitioners, states Freddy was a kitty who began scratching in all the wrong places.  The owners were angry at Freddy.

Rodan says, “At least with dogs, if you neglect ’t find assistance from your veterinarian for behavior issues, there’s your dog coach.  For cats, folks never had an alternative ” now, there is one.  And even better, that person is a vet or someone working in conjunction with your vet.  As part of the course we answer specific questions, but we surely describe that all cats will need to scratch.  We talk about scratching posts.  Freddy had an article, which explains why the owners couldn’t understand what was happening.  However, the post was carpeting, and Freddy didn’t like using it.  When the owners replaced it with a post wound together with sisal and re-located the kitty scratching post away in the litter box, then Freddy was quite pleased to make use of it. ”

Rodan says that if she wasn’t accessible as a resource, the situation may have worsened, and the bond between the family and Freddy might have disintegrated, with Freddie landing in a refuge.

Rodan is so sold to the concept of courses for kitties; they’ve been included in the American Association of “Feline Practitioners Behavior Guidelines,” that she co-authored with Overall (free to obtain: https://www.aafponline.org/resources/guidelines/Feline_Behavior_Guidelines.pdf).  With vets around America reading these guidelines, kitty courses are bound to catch on.

Maybe.  1 vet sure doesn’t think so.  “Cats don’t want to go to school,” state Dr. Marilyn Mikiciuk, an internal medicine specialist in Alsip, IL, and former president of the Chicago Veterinary Medical Association.  She states that she ’s also concerned about infectious diseases being passed from kitten to kitten.  “You’re starting a Pandora’s Box,” she warns.

Rodan response is that cats have to be vet checked prior to enrolling.  What’s , all kitties are hand-inspected for ringworm and fleas till they’re permitted to interact with all the other students.  In case a litter box is used during a class, it’s immediately trashed.

Seksel, that has been supplying the classes the longest claims, “that I ’ve never had a health problem.  In reality, it’s potential that these kittens really construct their immune systems stronger with vulnerability to other people. ”

Mikiciuk isn’t convinced.  “Imagine if one (kitten) test is negative for feline leukemia, the cat enters the class, and then a second test a couple weeks later demonstrates favorable?  It can happen you know. ”

“Rubbish,” states Dr. Ian Dunbar, of Berkeley, Calif. “Sure, that may happen.  Anything could happen.  The truth is that more cats die since they scrape in the wrong places or miss the (clutter ) box compared to of feline leukemia. ”

Dunbar, a veterinary behaviorist and certified applied behaviorist is credited with pioneering the idea of puppy kindergarten classes in the late 1970s to the1980s.  He states in a few ways socialization classes might even be beneficial for cats.  “They’re inside their entire lives, and that’s nice so they don’t get killed by automobiles.  However they want things to do.  Being socialized to venture out to the world on a harness or in a carrier is wonderful. ”

“Of course, pretty much anything you can train a puppy to do you can train a cat to do ” except that the cat will probably do it better,” Rodan says and laughs.

“The great majority of indoor cats endure terminal coughing,” adds Overall.  “Some cats choose their anxieties out on the curtains or onto themselves (behavior issues like compulsively licking ), but just vegetate, transforming into overweight couch potatoes.  They eat, and if you’re lucky, they use the litter box. ”

It’s not only a matter of teaching cats tricks.  In her course with Rodan, Vicky Freyber of Madison taught her kitty, Cali, to stay from her houseplants.

Sherri Ruppel at Chicago adds, “I know if I had the chance to socialize Bates if he was young, he'd be less anxious and a lot more sociable now.  It'd be worth a whole lot, I suggest Bates is fine ” however he’s sure not happy if something out of the ordinary happens, or perhaps when I have traffic. ”

Don’t worry about applying for a scholarship, the kitty classes are usually inexpensive.  Rodan doesn’t bill her own clients a fee, others pay $10.

Seksel agrees and says graduates of her Kitty Kindy tend to be sociable and better understood by their owners.  Who knows, maybe some day Americans will import Vegemite, too.

[tyffani]

What’s your skincare routine look like❓

I don’t know about you, but I have used so many skincare products I have enough to open my own beauty shop‼️ 🤫 I have EXTREMELY sensitive skin & so I do have an very hard time finding products that not only work for my sensitive skin, but that are effective & don’t dry my already dry skin out even more, or make it too oily. I find it not only hard, but confusing to get on an website or go to the store to buy products & have an questionnaire to fill out, or just read the products & pray🙏🏼 that I get it right. Usually 9/10 times I don’t get it right & neither does the questionnaire🥺 so then I am left with this product that I have used that doesn’t work. I have bought expensive skincare products like Meaningful Beauty skincare line by Cindy Crawford, I mean, who wouldn’t love skin as gorgeous as hers⁉️ She literally looks as if she hasn’t aged in decades💯 I wanted her secrets and truly thought her product was the answer for me. I did buy the product, the entire skincare line, & spent a pretty penny for it too 🤫 I didn’t see any changes to my skins texture, dryness, wrinkles, complexion, nothing. I noticed that some of her products I couldn’t use as soon as I got out of the shower, it caused irritation to my skin. My guess would be because my pores were opened right after an hot shower. I have very uneven skin tone, it’s red, almost rosacea like & extremely sensitive & dry. The product didn’t help with my dry skin at all. I did like one of the products that helps blur fine lines and smooth the skin, I used it as an primer & it did make my skin so very smooth feeling, but other then that, nothing. I have used Clinique, It Cosmetics for Red Skin, Rodan +Fields, Neutrogena, Aveeno & Clarins (many other products too) while none of these worked & gave me the results I was looking for, some even made my skin worse. I did come across an AMAZING company that has the BEST skincare products I have ever tried & they offer an money back guarantee, which to me was the icing on the cake‼️ I got my products in the mail & fell in love immediately, I am not exaggerating either‼️ I then wanted to try their other products, as they have an Haircare system, wellness products & even an firming lotion that I couldn’t wait to try. I was truly impressed with all of their products that now I get to help spread the word and share how amazing these products are, they truly can change your life; they did mine‼️😀 My routine is as follows •wake up •wash face with Neora Face wash •apply Daytime age fighting IQ cream •get dressed & go about my day •wash face with Neora Face wash •apply Neora Age defying IQ Night cream (do not rub all the way in) •wake up & wash off nite cream. Every other day in winter months I apply the Illumaboost & in spring/summer I apply it every day. Illumaboost is an amazing product that helps with sun spots, age spots, & uneven skin tone. It also helps brighten your face, it’s loaded with vitamin c. I also use the Neora Acne wipes occasionally to help with skin tone & such. My son uses them every day, he now has the clearest skin; he has always had issues with bad acne until Neora. I use Neora eye cream every other night, unless i feel I need it more often. I play it by ear. If my eyes are really bad I apply an eye gel patch to them, this gives INSTANT results. I then take Youth Factor supplement every day & drink the powder mix, these two work together to help fight aging from the inside out. It helps with hair, nails, skin, bone & even fatigue. This is literally amazing products that help reverse the signs of aging. It’s products that every man & woman should be taking that your body needs! I then take the Prolistic Powder daily, this helps with so many symptoms (anxiety, thyroid issues, migraines, acid reflux, digestive issue, weight gain, fatigue, memory loss) too many issue to list them all, but this will help with them all & even more..it protects your immune system as it’s got Pre & ProBiotics in it‼️ The firming Cream is Lipo in bottle. Click on the link below, check out the photos below.

#acne skin care #skincare routine #flawlessskin #no makeup #nomakeupneeded #firmingcream #anti aging #agingskin #wrinkles #beauty #haircare #natural hair #grey hair #skincare #aging #hairthickening #beautiful #eye crinkles #eyecream #eyegel

[astoundingbeyondbelief]

A Facebook page called Celebrity ICONS is reporting that Haruo Nakajima passed away today, at the age of 88. I don’t really know what that organization is -- seems to be involved in bringing tokusatsu actors to U.S. conventions -- but as major players in the fandom are treating the news with the utmost solemnity, it is clear that the post is authentic.

For twelve movies made over eighteen years, Haruo Nakajima was Godzilla, but he was even more than that. Whenever Eiji Tsuburaya needed a fearless stuntman to hop inside a rubber suit during the golden age of Japanese sci-fi, he answered the call. Rodan, Meganulon, Moguera, Varan, Mothra, Maguma, Matango, Baragon, King Kong, Black Moth, Gezora, Ganimes, seven different Ultra Series villains... enough monsters to fill Ogasawara Island twice over.  He made it all look so effortless, even as he was thrown into pools and ditches, set on fire, shot with fireworks, and sweat away countless pounds under the relentless studio lights.

And -- though never credited as such -- he was a fight choreographer too. Kaiju scripts in those days didn’t describe kaiju battles in detail, only when they took place. When Shinichi Sekizawa wrote King Kong vs. Godzilla, for instance, the details of the vs. were up to Nakajima.

While anyone could guess that Godzilla was really a man in a suit from the day he first stalked across Japanese scenes, Toho didn’t credit Nakajima in the role until the fifth entry in the series, Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster. But as Akira Takarada, who received first billing on Godzilla, found out on his first day of work, Nakajima was always the star. Imbuing a dinosaur costume with personality isn’t easy. Most people would be lucky to get through the experience without passing out from exhaustion. Nakajima not only persevered, he helped sell Godzilla’s unlikely transformation from scourge to savior. In the character’s first outing, he was dissolved in Tokyo Bay by the only weapon on the planet more powerful than he was, a grim but necessary task. Godzilla vs. Gigan, Nakajima’s last time in the suit, also ends with Godzilla in the sea, but this time he’s got a friend at his side who just helped him save the world from a three-headed dragon, a cyborg chicken, and a race of intelligent cockroaches. And the song, you know the song:

Forty-five years later, Godzilla is flying higher than ever -- a Japanese critical darling and Hollywood star set to appear in five more movies by 2020. Nakajima was keeping quite active himself, with a string of appearances at American sci-fi conventions, until age started to catch up with him in recent months. Monsters, of course, live forever. The people who bring them to life are never so lucky.

Fight on, Godzilla. Rest in peace, Mr. Nakajima.

#haruo nakajima #writing

[somethingheresomethingthere]

Skincare Journey

March 20, 2020

I’ve decided to start documenting the things I try because actually what the hell is going on with my face. 

I didn’t have this much acne when I was at my peak of puberty, and there’s nothing in my life to explain it. No change in diet, water consumption, birth control, stress or routine. For a few years, I was using Rodan + Fields Unblemish. My skin was generally clear, but I often had dry skin, a breakout here and there, and was unsatisfied with how many harsh chemicals are in the product.

Cleanser

March 20, 2020

Figuring I had generally good skin, should switch to a product that didn’t directly target acne, and wouldn’t be as harsh, I switched to Rodan + Fields Reverse. I used Reverse for about three months before the breakouts came. The product felt way to harsh, and I was swinging between oily and dry skin. Always looking irritated after wash. I realize now, this was dumb cause it is extra harsh, aimed at combatting aging skin. I just went with it, because that’s what my mom uses. Should have tried Redefine if I was going to stay in the Rodan + Fields family.  

I am going for a natural, more hands-off wash. Amber recommends only washing your face at night, but I still want some kind of refresher in the morning. I maintain that moisture must be important-right? Per Ashlin’s recommendation, I ordered Philosophy’s Purity Made Simple One-Step Facial Cleanser; I will only cleanse at night or after a workout. 

April 1, 2020

Started Philosophy’s Purity Made Simple One-Step Facial Cleanser about a week ago and things are starting to clear up. Focusing on washing more intentionally. 

April 6, 2020

Okay, so I know it’s only been two weeks, but things are looking bad. Went online to find some dermatologist solutions. 

Sulfur is good in cleansers because its anti-inflamatory and targets acne, but is sensitive. Unblemish and Purity both have sulfur as a main ingredient, so this is good. 

April 13, 2020

Actually read up on Purity and learned it contains parabans, sulfates, and other irritating ingredients. Parabens are preservatives associated with cancer that are banned in the EU. Sulfates are cleaning agents that are too strong for the human body because they strip away natural oils.

Ordered Derma E Vitamin C Brightening Gentle Daily Cleansing Paste and it should be here next week. Should help with a more thorough evening cleanse.

May 8, 2020

Started Derma E Vitamin C Cleansing Paste.

Recommendations

Pure One-Step Camellia Cleansing Oil from Tatcha. Cleansing Oil helps to remove makeup and other oils. Should use gel cleanser after oil cleanser.

Toner

March 20, 2020

I’ve used witch hazel before as a quick cleanse or refresher in temporary place of a cleanse, but I found it dries my skin and could do without the fragrance for the clean score. 

Per recommendation and curiosity, I ordered Garnier Micellar Water for morning and post-cleansing use to get all makeup/dirt really out.

April 6, 2020

Dermatologist research confirms micellar water is a good. Gentle exfoliant, also takes off remaining makeup. Don’t need to moisturize after micellar if freshening up after workout.

April 13, 2020

Bought fragrance free witch hazel today. It has additional soothing properties over micellar. 

Recomendations

Derma E Micellar Cleansing Water with Vitmain C 

Moisturizer

March 20, 2020

I am using Kiehl's Ultra Facial Cream right now, and I feel like it almost over-moisturizes. I’ve used Kiehl’s Ultra Facial Oil-Free Gel-Cream before and liked it better, but no better than the cheaper Neutrogena version. 

I’m also going back to Neutrogena’s Hydro Boost Moisturizer, to be used morning and night. 

April 1, 2020

Been using Neutrogena’s Hydro Boost Moisturizer for about a week and feels much cleaner. Rebuy would switch to extra SPF with Neutrogena Hydro Boost with SPF. Might need more hydration at night tho.

April 6, 2020

Dermatologist research confirms light, water and gel based moisturizer good, but needs to be a sunscreen.

May 13, 2020

Started using CeraVe Moisturizing Cream. It’s a decent price, non-comedogenic, and fragrance free. It is light and water based. More moisturizing then Neutrogena.

Sunscreen

March 20, 2020

The R+F sunscreen was way too thick and oily to be daily. 

April 13, 2020

Neutrogena water gel with SPF 50 came today. I thought it was same thing I’ve been using but with SPF, but it’s more of a cream then a gel. Light enough and I’m liking it so far.

Recommendations:

Tatcha’s sunscreen as a moisturizer. 

Acne Treatment

March 20, 2020

Proactiv’s Refining Mask as a spot treatment is really helping - and yes, it does smell like middle school. 

April 6, 2020

Dermatologist research says to use Benzoyl peroxide to treat white-heads and hormonal acne. This is in the step three of Unblemish, so that’s probably what my skin is missing. Hoping my Curology I ordered today will have some in it. Known to stain clothing. Use over entire affected area not just the pimple. Salicylic acid is an alternative that is less harsh. 

The proactive refining mask is a sulfur treatment, like the cleansers. maybe I need a stronger spot treatment?

April 13, 2020

Started Curology today. My formula is 1% Clindamycin 4% Azelaic Acid and .25% Zinc Pyrithione. 

I’m supposed to stop using these ingredients while my skin adjusts to Curology: Benzoyl Peroxide, Salicylic Acid, AHA (e.g., glycolic acid, lactic acid), Topical Vitamin C, and Retinol - so basically everything that’s supposed to help? I’m guessing the recommendation is to not overload during transition. 

May 3, 2020

Curology is working okay. The hormonal breakouts aren’t nearly as angry. I’m not wowed by the results tho. I plan to keep using and work on my other products before I give up.

June 3, 2020

Switched my birth control back. Started Skinfood Peach Sake Pore Serum.

Recommendations

Serums for acne should include Retinol, Vitamin C, Zinc, and/or Salicylic Acid.

Always moisturize after serums.

Texture may be a result of lack of exfoliation.

The Ordinary Niacinamid 10% + Zinc 1% Serum for Acne

Pixi Overnight Glow Serum for overnight exfoliation

Naturally G4U Beauty Has No Age - Retinol Anti-Wrinkle Serum

111Skin 3 Phase Anti Blemish Booster

Caudalie Vinopure Skin Perfecting Serum

Bioderma Sebium Pore Refiner

TOTAL

$13.95 Derma E Vitamin C Brightening Gentle Daily Cleansing Paste

$4.69 Dickinson's Original Witch Hazel Pore Perfecting Toner

$16 Skinfood Peach Sake Pore Serum

$19.95 Curology

$13.49 CeraVe Moisturizing Cream

$24 Clear Proof® Deep-Cleansing Charcoal Mask

$65 Tatcha Rice Polish: Deep Foaming Enzyme Powder

[chasingyourglow]

🗣Something you might not know about R+F... Doctors, Dermatologists, Nurses, Teachers, CEO’s, business owners, executives... are just a few of the titles of the smart people that have seen the potential in this business. This is NOT YOUR TYPICAL direct sales company. . . Dr. Keren Horn, Dermatologist and owner of Dermatology & Aesthetics of Wicker Park in Chicago, is not the only Physician who holds the title of both Doctor and Rodan + Fields Consultant. There are MANY! Why do you think that is??? . . After doing her research, reviewing the product ingredient lists & business model, she told her husband, who is also a dermatologist, that she wanted to join our doctors in business. . . She goes on to say.... "Rodan + Fields allows me to reach thousands more people than I could possibly see in my own practice.... it takes the guess work out of the aging process." . . Call me, you know you want to! 📲 Open to all questions. . . . #ChasingYourGlow #EmpowerEachother #JoyScouts #BreakFree #GlowTribeVibes #GlowScout #GlowUp #doctors #esthetician #surgeons #mua #dermatologist (at Chasing Your Glow) https://www.instagram.com/p/BsnY_FgH0Xn/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=xmpv65ggdlm8

#chasingyourglow #empowereachother #joyscouts #breakfree #glowtribevibes #glowscout #glowup #doctors #esthetician #surgeons #mua #dermatologist

[vestedbeauty]

Crepe Erase Review On Day 21

New Post has been published on https://vestedbeauty.com/crepe-erase/

Crepe Erase Review On Day 21

When I saw an ad for Crepe Erase on my Facebook newsfeed, I was intrigued.

I mean, Crepe Erase has Dorothy Hamill as a spokesperson, for Pete’s sake! Hey, I wore her hairstyle from about fifth-grade until eighth, and I know Dorothy wouldn’t lie, right?

Plus, the other spokesperson is Jane Seymour, the eternally ethereal beauty from Somewhere In Time. No way would she travel through time and leave young Christopher Reeves behind just to BS me about skin care.

See how scientific I am?

Girl, you don’t know the half of how easy a sell I am. This is nothing. When I do copywriting for clients, half the time I have to practically lock my wallet in the safe to keep myself from whipping out a credit card. It’s ridiculous. But while I usually cruise right past ads on Facebook, this one grabbed my attention long enough for me to watch their whole video.

I won’t lie… I’ve been extraordinarily blessed in the genes department. My mother turns 72 this month and she is GORGEOUS. People are shocked when they find out how old she is. The same thing happens when people find out that I turned 50 last year. In fact, I’ve had complete strangers guess my age at a decade or more younger than I am, which usually prompts a mini happy dance on my part. Now that I’m letting my gray hair stay gray, I don’t get carded much anymore, but when I was coloring it, it happened almost all the time. It probably helps that I was an avid reader as a kid, and after getting a horrible sunburn on a family beach vacation (the kind of sunburn that leaves you nauseous, shivering, and crying because your bedsheets hurt)… I typically don’t go out much during prime sunburn times.

That Crepey Skin on My Neck, Though…

When I DO go out in the sun, whoever’s with me usually starts our outing by rubbing my sunscreen in better. Globs here or there, you know the look. I can honestly say I’ve taken the “wear sunscreen” advice given in commencement addresses to heart. Except maybe… possibly… I just might have forgotten my neck and decolletage now and then. Okay, maybe more frequently than that.

I’ve got to tell you, it was a bit of a shock when I moved into my current home and the master bath’s vanity mirror was tipped just so at an angle that nearly made me jump out of my crepey skin like there was someone else in the mirror! I started moisturizing like a fiend but it didn’t really do any good. As I’m not a fan of crewneck or scoop neck collars (who likes getting choked by their own shirt?!), my v-neck-filled wardrobe was a pretty good reason to look for a solution.

Enter Dorothy and Jane.

Gotta Say, Crepe Erase Looks Scammy

Hey, even marketers have standards. Thank goodness I’m a bit of a minimalist and I don’t watch television, or else the highly suggestible part of my brain would bankrupt me. Usually, if I watch an ad, I’m dissecting it to pull out the copywriting bits. Headline and hook, benefits and bullet points, objections, call to action, all that. They sell on a subscription model, which can be scammy. If you ever belonged to the Columbia Record Club and tried to cancel your membership, you’ve probably been likewise schooled on the dangers of getting roped into an inescapable subscription plan. I made sure to jot down the cancellation phone number… just in case.

Watching that ad, though, my skeptical self was spellbound. Those before and after shots got me good. Having pared my makeup bag down to just seven products, using a Rodan + Fields system on my face, and indulging in some Posh bath and body products that I buy from a fellow writer, there was a little bit of wiggle room in my skin care budget. So, I took the plunge, knowing I could return it if it was worthless. I bought the Crepe Erase Essentials System. It includes:

1 full-size Exfoliating Body Polish

1 full-size Intensive Body Repair Treatment

And a free gift (the redundancy of that term bugs the stew out of me!)

My gift with purchase was a small jar of eye creme-filled ampules. They feel nice, but I don’t know that I’d order them because there’s no apparent improvement.

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Unboxing Day Was a Good Start

  Everything was packed carefully. Nothing exploded in transit. The usage instructions were clear.

Each morning, you dampen your neck and chest and then apply the Exfoliating Body Polish and rub it in. I do my face scrub (I buy Rodan + Fields from my friend Megan) at the same time, and then hop into the shower to rinse it and do normal shower stuff. When you get out, you rub a pea-sized amount of the Intensive Body Repair Treatment onto your neck and chest for about a minute. That’s it.

Some details that might matter to you:

Not tested on animals

No parabens or phthalates

Not fragrance-free – it’s got a very light citrus scent

Okay, Okay, I’ll Show You How Crepe Erase Works!

You’ve been so patient. But I know that what you really want to know is… Does It Work?????? 

On the left is my “before” picture. On the right is a photo taken 21 days later. I tried to get the same lighting, angle, all that – more just so I could see for myself whether Crepe Erase was making a difference, but also so I could give you a picture that was worth looking at.

Honestly, I was pretty shocked that there was such a difference!

I’ve barely put a dent in the products so far. I can tell that I’ll run out of Body Polish long before I run out of the Body Repair Treatment.

The BEST Way to Buy Crepe Erase… Is Not from CrepeErase.com

If you buy from the site, you CAN get a nice rebate with Ebates, which is great. In fact, if you buy stuff online on a regular basis, you should definitely register with Ebates to get cash back on purchase you’d make anyway. Expect to pay about $39.95 for your first shipment, plus tax, if you get the package I got. They have others. The second shipment in your subscription will be more like $59.95 plus shipping, and no gift with purchase.

But… if you have Amazon Prime (you do, don’t you? Try Amazon Prime 30-Day Free Trial), you can get the same package for $50 and free shipping. PLUS, no subscription, so you can just order when you want to rather than getting a surprise bill and shipment when you’ve still got half a jar of the creme. My plan is to cancel with CrepeErase.com and just buy what I need with Amazon going forward.

OK, I’ve got to tell you, all this talk about Crepe-anything now has me kind of craving a Nutella-filled crepe! Not the same at all, but there’s that power of suggestion thing working again!

Anyhow, if you click on the links in this post and buy anything, someone somewhere will send me a few bucks, which I will likely blow on bacon or a nice single-malt scotch, depending. Hope this was helpful!

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#Crepe Erase