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#also its 1am so goodnight
hayakawapartner · 3 months
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aki with a s/o with chronic pain . . .
!!! this post is sfw, but minors dni with this post/blog !!!
notes: gn!disabled!reader, this is self indulgent i tried to make this fitting for more general chronic pain! reader might come across as ehlers danlos-coded (is that a thing?? weird thing for me to type)
aki is already so sweet and caring with you, of course he would be helpful when your chronic pain flares up.
he notices that you’re moving a bit slower, taking shorter steps, taking a longer time to get up from your seat… and he’s immediately there to help
VERY quick to ask what you need, but he also tries to offer your usual solutions
“where does it hurt? do you need a heating pad? painkillers? tiger balm? do you want me to run a warm bath?”
if you have fluctuating mobility/occasionally use a mobility aid, he does his best to keep everything in a convenient spot for you. crutches near the bed so you can slide your arms in and get up with a bit more ease, rollator in a place where you don’t trip but it’s easy to access…
he was initially Overly Careful with you so he didn’t aggravate your pain further, but as he grows used to your needs, he’s still careful but he’s not scared of breaking you like he used to be
kisses the back of your neck while gently massaging your sore joints/muscles, murmuring soft “i love you”s and “you’re gonna be okay”s while he’s rubbing tiger balm onto your sorest spots
if he hears your joints pop he gets really nervous until you specify if it was a good/bad pop
if a spot is too sore, he won’t touch it in case he hurts you even more.
and if you just Can’t get out of bed for the day? he calls off from work to take care of you. brings you comfort food, helps you to the bathroom when you need it, makes sure you’re hydrated and taking your meds…
SPEAKING OF MEDS. this man is so good at reminding you
“did you forget to take your meds? maybe you should take them now, love. it’ll help you feel less sore.”
he’s very careful to make sure he doesn’t shame you for forgetting meds, for needing help, for being in pain. he just does whatever he can to make sure you’re okay and empathises with your complaints about your aches.
while he hates seeing you in pain during a flare-up, he becomes extra doting just to make sure your needs are met. cooks your fav comfort meal, makes sure all your pillows are soft and arranged to keep you comfy, refills your water bottle whenever it’s almost empty, etc.
he’s just so loving… aaauuuu
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lottiemilfews · 7 months
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simone kessell as sasha clarke in wonderland (2013-2015) - 3x09
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tei-to-tei · 1 year
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"Guess I can't give you a hand with your projects anymore, Donnie."
"...Sometimes, I wish you came with an 'off' switch."
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mangostar · 2 years
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redraw from a year ago!! wow!! 
old pic under !! 
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i like to think ive improved :) 
and heres them w/o shading ^^
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toastsnaffler · 11 months
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istg one of these days.......
#ya know that post thats like texting lesbians: its throw bowling balls down the stairs day u better be game#one of my fave posts ever in the world#anyway my lesbian flatmate texts like the straight female friend part of that post and i love her but its killing me#its endearing but its so hard not to read it as flirty stoppitttt im already dedicating so much work to repressing this little crush 😭#ALSO THAT POST THATS LIKE FLIRTING W GIRLS WILL HAVE U ADDING :3 TO UR TEXTS literally so true but I dont think she means it like that 😭😭#like she talks to everyone that way I remember when I first met her me + my ex spent ages trying to work out if she was gay#bc we were so sure she had a gay vibe but every text felt like it was pointing the other way..... the vindication when I found out she WAS#anyway my resolve weakens with every 😘 emoji like im already thinking abt it dont give me any more ideas !!!!#its not even embarrassing anymore like how am i supposed to exist near someone like her WITHOUT ever having a gay thought#so im not sorry if she sees this. i take rejection like a champ dont be shy#but genuinely tho i dont think shes interested shes just cute like that. and idw make things weird cuz we're still living together next yr#itd be suchh a pain if i made things awkward right when we need to find a place. and anyway my best case is our 3rd flatmates WORST#i wouldnt do that to him god forbid#buuuut...... nope ok enough of that im going back to bed its almost 1am#this is what HAPPENS when u have insomnia tuning into the crazy radio every night#need to get onto dating apps and find smth new to distract me before this gets out of hand....... buttttt i dont want to >:|#its ok my patience is infinite i like playing the long game. i was into my ex for 2 and a half years before i made any moves#i can wait this one out too either itll happen eventually or itll pass. we're good#ok thats GOODNIGHT from me if u read this far wow ur nosy arent u...... jk ily sleep well everyone#muah all round#.diaries
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shadow0-1 · 1 year
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A persistent problem I have is the absolute refusal to post something without a caption
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dear-ao3 · 7 months
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greetings my friends, romans and fellow countrymen. the time has come once again for me to spin you a yarn of a ridiculous, but absolutely true, tale.
is it candles again, saph? nay.
delaware, then? regrettably, no.
it is a ghost.
as you may know, katya (the other mod on this account) and i have recently moved into an apartment together, which is something that should have never been allowed but alas someone gave us adult money the power to make silly decisions and we went buck wild.
said apartment is weird and old. it may have been a hotel at one point. the building is entirely crooked, and we have 70s parquet floors, popcorn ceilings and a heat lamp in our bathroom.
katya was at the apartment (hereafter referred to as "the popcorn palace") before i was and one night about a week ago called me at 9pm to say "holy shit bestie i think i just saw a mouse"
mice in apartment buildings are not uncommon. and i said as much.
katya searched the whole apartment for the mouse or evidence of mice and came up empty. it was only then that katya told me that he had been sitting in the dining room at the time of the mouse sighting and thought that he had seen it out of the corner of his eye. and, that he was prone to seeing things that weren't there. and he was also tired.
nevertheless !!! katya went down to the front desk and said hello we have a mouse and the front desk said ok bet an exterminator will be there on tuesday.
a few days goes by. there are no more mouse sightings.
and then i moved in.
the day of the move in i woke up at 6am, drove 3.5 hours with my dad blasting a playlist of billy joel, pitbull and children's music, scrubbed crusty vomit out of my sisters new dorm room's carpets for 11 hours and finally arrived at the popcorn palace at 1am. to put it simply, i was exhausted.
katya was not at the popcorn palace that night. this is a crucial detail.
i went to shower around 2am and afterwards was standing at the sink brushing my teeth. out of the corner of my eye. i see something small run across the carpet in the hall.
my first thought was holy shit its the mouse
my second thought was wait a minute did i really see it
i went into the hall, half naked, and searched for the mouse. i found nothing. and then i went to bed.
the following day when katya spawned in i said, oh by the way i may have seen the mouse, but it was 2am and i had been up for 20 hours and it was out of the corner of my eye.
and katya looked me in the eyes and said.
"hey bestie. what if its a ghost. what if we have a ghost mouse."
it is important to note that neither of us believe in ghosts.
we named the ghost mouse desperaux.
you may think this is the end of the tale, but no.
nay! weary reader!
last night katya, fennec (katyas partner) and i were all in the apartment. we were up late dealing with a situation. at about 12:50am we all said goodnight and went to bed.
i turned off the bathroom light, the hall light, and then closed my door and hopped on tumblr for a few minutes. katya and fennec were still awake and at about 1am i saw the hall light turn on. i was like hm. they must still be awake. and so i went to bed.
i woke up at 7am to get ready for work and noticed that the hall light was still on. i figured that they must have forgotten to turn it off.
i turn off the hall light on my way to the bathroom and go about business as usual. katya comes out of his room to go make coffee and i say casually.
"oh bestie, why was the hall light on all night?"
and katya says "i thought you turned it on"
and i said "i was already in my room when it turned on"
katya looked concerned.
and i said "i turned the light off before i went to bed and i heard you guys still awake and then the light went on so i figured you went into the hall and forgot to turn it off"
and then katya said, very slowly, with fear in his eyes, "we were still in my room when the light went on because fennec got up to go check that the door was locked and said "oh the hall light is on, saph must have turned it on"
we both stared at each other in mild shock horror. do we have a ghost? it seems likely. did the ghost mouse turn on the hall light? potentially.
the exterminator is coming today. hopefully he specializes in ghosts.
we will keep you updated.
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cannibalismpdf · 2 years
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not to get dramatic but it does feel like nothing I'm doing now matters cause anyway there's gonna be a massive social collapse in like 5-10 years (probably way less let's be honest) so it's like. why should I work on a future if there's no future at all. idk. it's 1am.
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catcleric · 2 years
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mentally ill boy binge watches show that he doesn’t even like that much with intolerable characters and 1 hour episodes.
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tzuyuscloud · 10 months
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Iced Americano please Kim Minji x fem reader
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Everyday on your way to the bookstore you walk pass the neighborhood skatepark where she is often found. She has long brown hair that stays tied up, big brown eyes and is always flooding in her clothes. You like to take extra time when passing the park just to admire her beauty from afar because god forbid you ever speaking to her in fear of embarrassing yourself.
The bookstore was always quiet and was nicely decorated by the owner who happened to be your boss. The same old customers came by checking out mangas and renting other books, nothing exciting ever happened. Until the bell rang indicating that someone walked in,
“Hello.” you softly spoke and a soft voice responded with a, “hi” causing you to look up and see skater girl. You physically felt your heart skip a few beats as your jaw hit the floor. Clearing your throat and rubbing your eyes you focused your view on the girl who was in the romance mangas section looking through a few books.
With a book in her hands, she made her way to the counter where you stood. “is this all for today?” you asked nervously.
“could I also get your number?” The girl asked with a smile that lit up the room. You felt like you were gonna pass out if she looked at you any more.
“I-Um y-yeah sure” you stuttered as you rung up the book. “that’s a great series by the way” you nervously laughed.
The girl smiled, “really? I heard it was good so I had to see for myself” she said. “Ill call you” she winked before exiting the store with her skateboard rested under her pit.
At the end she left with your number and heart.
You couldn’t believe the last twenty minutes, pinching you arm constantly in hopes that the universe was just playing mind games but no, pretty girl was in fact in the store and asked for your number. When you realized she never gave you her name…
After your shift you closed up store just to see the same pretty girl leaning up against the building with her skateboard leaning next to her. “Gosh I was scared that you slept there too, you get off so late” she said with her brows furrowed slightly showing concern for you walking home late.
The fact that she asked for your number and then waited for you had you doing summersaults in your head. “Oh yeah I work closing shift on the weekends.” You nervously laughed.
“where do you live?” The girl asked as she walked beside you.
You pointed down the long street, “i live at the end of the block over there.”
“Oh really!? I live on the same street! That’s why I like to come skate a lot because its just down the street. Oh by the way my name is Minji. I forgot to introduce myself, Kim Minji”
Kim Minji. The name suits her so well. You felt yourself staring at the girl for a while until she finally got you out of your trance. “what’s your name, pretty girl?” she smirked causing heat to rush to your face.
“Ahem..y/n” you tried to hide your blush but Minji saw it and couldn’t help but tease you.
“Your blush is as cute as your name” Curse this woman being so smooth with her compliments, your face was never gonna feel the cool evening breeze again with how heated its getting.
The both of you emerged in deep conversation, topic after topic outside of y/n’s house until 1am hit. “its getting late and you need your sleep. How about we get some coffee tomorrow?” Minji smiled as she helped you stand up.
“Ill be waiting” you responded before saying your goodbyes. Not long after did you receive a message from what seemed to be Minji.
Unknown: ill pick you up at noon
Unknown: Save my number as ‘Minji 💜’
Minji 💜: goodnight cutie ^3^
Next day
As promised, Minji was at your door step exactly at Noon in baggy streetwear and skateboard tucked under her arm. This time she wore her hair in two buns with strands of hair falling into her face making her look cuter than before, if that was even possible.
“I know a great coffee shop nearby” Minji said, “they have great Iced Americanos”
On the way there she tried to get you to ride her skateboard which just ended up being you standing on the board while she held you up. Her laughter was the best thing you’ve heard in a long while.
“What do you want?” Minji asked you at the counter. “um I don’t know, I don’t drink a lot of coffee” you answered leaving her faced distorted in judgement.
“How do you survive with no coffee? Oh you poor soul” She joked. “Here you should try-“
“I’ll try your drink” You decided catching her off guard. “Oh well, two iced americanos please!” she smiled to the cashier who looked done with their shit.
Minji happily drank the coffee while watching you chug the drink in front of you. “Bro this is good” you gasped.
“you’re already using my slang thats cute” Minji teased you. The rest of your date went smooth ending with her dropping you back off at your porch, but this time she leaned in leaving a kiss on your cheek.
“Goodnight pretty girl” she winked before dropping her skateboard on the ground and skating down the street.
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littlerainyghoul · 4 months
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Aether trying to put a fussy little dew to bed...sounds like fun lol
Do you think you can write a fic about this?
yeah sure! of course!
I love writing regressed dew, and I think him being fussy fits his personality so well! Thank you for the request!
Without futher ado:
1am shenanigans
Summary: It’s 1am, and a tired Aether is trying to put the very energetic regressed fireghoul to bed.
words: 900
Pairings: Regressed Dewdrop, Caregiver Aether, also brief appearance of Cirrus
The fire ghoul spurled around the room, his body wriggling and gleaming with energy as he chased around the laser pointer Cirrus was playing with around the ghoul common room. He had the been chasing the laser for hours before, and the energy of the ghoul came to no end as he bounced around the room.
“Deww! Its time for some shut eye! It’s 1 am dear” Aether's voice rang out in the ghoul common room, laced with nothing but concern for the fire ghoul. He stepped in front of the energetic rascal, his body exuding a presence of gentle calmness.
"But....Aefey! I don't want to go to bed! I'm not tired" Dewdrop whine, disappointment lingering in his eyes, his nose scrunched in disgust at the idea of being put to bed.
“I know, little firefly, but don't you want to wake up and have the energy to play tomorrow?" Aether spoke, as he gestured to Cirrus to put away the laser pointer.
”Aether is right, you know, I think it's time for us to go to bed“ Cirrus spoke, her voice croaky from all the laughter she passed in the past couple of hours.
”Not tired! Cirrus! Please can we play some more?" Dewdrop shot his words, as he pounced in the air and crossed his arms.
“None can do, kid” Cirrus spoke as she yawned “I'm off to have my evening shower, see ya in the morning Aeth! Goodnight little one!“ she cooed the last part to Dewdrop.
”We need to calm you down, firefly" Aether whispered.
“Aeth, five more minutes? I really want to run around! It's so fun!"
"Nope, all the other ghouls went to bed. Now would you be a good boy for me? I'll tuck you in if you behave" Aether spoke, slight irritation lingering in his voice.
Dewdrop's lower lip jutted out ever so slightly, showcasing the classic sign of a pout. The smooth curve of his lips now held a hint of resistance, a silent protest against the unwelcome suggestion of sleep. Even his fiery aura seemed to flicker with a subdued intensity, mirroring the conflicted emotions etched across his expressive face.
“Please Dew?” Aether begged, his usual friendly and warm eyes tinted with exhaustion, and a hint of concern. "Why do you even want to stay up, anyway?"
"Not tired, Aethy" Dewdrop confessed.
Aether looked at Dewdrop, his eyes reflecting a mix of weariness and amusement. "Come on, firefly, bedtime is calling, and even the laser pointer needs its beauty sleep."
Dewdrop's eyes widened at the mention of the laser pointer, torn between the allure of play and the idea that Aether used his emotions like that.
Aether chuckled, "You know, if the laser pointer could talk, it would probably be saying, 'Enough, Dew, I need a break!'" He mimicked a high-pitched, imaginary voice, eliciting a giggle from Cirrus.
Dewdrop, caught off guard by the unexpected humour, let out a small laugh but still looked reluctant. Aether seized the opportunity to continue the banter. "Besides, if you stay up all night, you'll turn into a nocturnal ghoul, and I'm not sure the others are ready for that."
Cirrus, who turned back from entering her room, joined in, "Yeah, Dew, imagine waking up to find yourself surrounded by sleepy ghouls trying to get ready for the day while you're bouncing off the walls."
The thought seemed to amuse Dewdrop, and his resistance waned as he envisioned the comical scenario. "Okay, okay, I guess I don't want to be the only ghoul wide awake when everyone else is snoring," he conceded with a grin.
Aether seized the moment, "That's right, firebug" Now, let's make bedtime a grand adventure. I'll even tell you a story about a mischievous fire ghoul who learned the importance of a good night's sleep."
With a playful twinkle in his eye, Aether led Dewdrop towards his bedroom. It glowed with the warmth of red and gold hues, evoking the essence of dancing flames. Adorned with tapestries and artwork depicting swirling fire motifs, the room's focal point was a bed with crackling ember-patterned sheets and flame-carved headboard. In a cozy corner, a lava lamp added a mesmerizing touch, its molten wax mimicking the fluid movement of lava, casting a dynamic play of light.
Dewdrop climbed into the bed, as Aether threw some blankets on his body, as he tucked in the ghoul.
"Cosy, my love?" Aether cooed softly, as he tuned on the lavalamp.
“Bed time story, please?” Dewdrop asked
"Absolutely, my little Dewcifer" Aether replied with a tender smile, the warm glow of the lava lamp casting a soft radiance across the room.
As Dewdrop nestled into the crackling ember-patterned sheets, Aether began to weave a bedtime story, his voice a soothing melody that harmonized with the gentle flicker of the fiery-themed bedroom. The tale unfolded like the dance of flames, carrying Dewdrop into a world where fire ghouls embarked on enchanting adventures beneath the starlit canopy. The lavalamp's liquid glow echoed the story's rhythm, creating a tranquil ambiance that embraced them both in the comforting warmth of the fire-themed haven.
He softly carressed Dew's cheek, as Dew softly purred while the quintessential ghoul recounted his story. As Aether continued his tale, the bond between them deepened, and the room became a haven where the warmth of the story and the glow of the lava lamp melded into a soothing lullaby, cradling Dewdrop in the arms of sweet dreams.
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t4tmetalsonic · 11 months
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that sonic blue star idea is SOOOO COOL !!! ik u said u were gnna make a comic abt it but are there any other things abt it that u can/wanna share rn ? its so interesting!!!!!
OOH I ALMOST MISSED THIS SORRY!!!
by comic i just mean like one page which hopefullyyy i'll do soon and it's not one of the many ideas i forget about gkjhdkfg
and!!! well. i've seen a lot of ppl compare sonic to the sun/stars already, like sonic and knuckles having a sun/moon dynamic (which is v cool) and then in undefeatable "i'm what you get when stars collide", which is specifically about super sonic. also super sonic being compared to the sun as yknow he's golden and glowing lol. so i'm basically taking all those ideas but then also applying my love of stars to it!!!
so by blue stars i mean both o-type and b-type main sequence stars (which is like. a normal not dying star. our sun is also main sequence) which are the biggest and hottest main sequence stars, AND live the shortest bc of it. like literally the brightest stars burn the shortest, that's not only a cool phrase but a scientific fact. and doesn't that sound like a certain blue hedgehog? going around being a bright beacon of hope and saving the world but putting himself in so much danger he'll probably die young? :')
another fun thing about these blue stars is they can go supernova!! our sun is too small so will never do this, when it gets old it'll simply expand a bit (well, enough to swallow up all the planets) and then the outer layers will blow away. but bigger stars? they go through the same process of expanding but then collapse under their own weight and depending on the exact mass and contents of the star, this collapse causes either a neutron star, a black hole or- BOOM. supernova!! (funnily enough, another way of forming a supernova is from certain types of stars colliding!) these can be bright enough to be visible in the day and be brighter than an entire galaxy. so yknow *gestures to super sonic* he's like a supernova!! albeit a lot more controlled
the detail of this comparison i like the most is that a supernova is the death of a star. a very bright and beautiful death, and the elements created in the process go on to form new stars and planets (and us) but a death nonetheless. sonic's super form uses up his life force and if he stays like that for too long, he dies! it's a controlled explosion! he is extremely powerful while actively dying, so it's an obvious connection for me to make!! also ofc because they're blue stars and he's also blue lol
unrelated to sonic now lol but supernova also leave behind rlly pretty remnants, for example the crab nebula!!
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(from the wikipedia page)
isn't she beautiful??? this one's especially cool to me as the supernova that caused this was observed in 1054! we were here before this was created!
if you want examples of actual blue stars too, the constellation orion has rigel! (the bottom right star iirc) this is actually a system of like. 4 stars? 3 of them are b-type stars and the biggest is actually a blue supergiant (essentially in the process of dying, it will eventually go supernova). another orion star, betelgeuse (top left) is currently a red supergiant but used to be an o-type (so it's also in the process of dying, when it goes boom it'll be as bright as the moon!)
so ummm yeah. i think this was more me rambling about stars than sonic LOL but yeah i think if we're going to compare sonic to a star, then a blue star is a much better fit than our sun 😤
thank u for coming to my ted talk it's now 1am goodnight
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wondero28 · 1 year
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Slowburn Shenanigans - Jesse
Me: hurr durr im gonna write Fuckboy stuff
Also me: slowburn romance tid bits with Jesse 😌
Repost Edit: slowburn tidbits for holiday lovin~
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- Slowburn romance with Jesse is,,, so SO unbelievably taunting. He’s so sickeningly fun to be around. You really cant help but want to hug and kiss him sometimes
- But boy oh boy, is his slowburn SLOW. There’s so SO much for him to consider when it comes to romance. He has to consider how his work will strain relationships, how his kids react & how they add their own difficulties, hell- even just how it’ll affect his time with the band at certain points. A relationship is a big deal for Jesse. He’s not just going to hop into one with you for shits & giggles, no matter how good you make him feel
- But that being said- you do make him feel good. You always have. Your presence, no matter if you’re relaxed or bouncing off the walls, helps ease him. You being there simply chips away at the tension in his shoulders & face. You being near & interacting with him always lightens his mood
- So of course he likes interacting with you.
- Whether it be one of his famous late night drives, where you and he just cruise out in the quiet of the night. Where no other soul can even try to bother the comfort of the darkness and the stars. Where you both take turns jamming out to tunes together- or talk and ramble about everything and nothing. Occasionally going out to gas stations and getting snacks and drinks at 1AM, eating away in the car & enjoying the company. And especially the nights when both of your arms relax and you brush your hands against each other while resting your arm on the console. On accident of course.. just a little accident that sends jolts of joy through his system every time
- Ooh! Or when you make your trips out to see him. Whether it be stopping by his place, saying hi to the kiddos while they watch TV, then eagerly visiting his art room. You closely examining all his work while he eagerly awaits your response- because he couldn’t give a single shit about a valued critic in media when the only critique he values is yours. Or when you join him in the kitchen at his home and help him whip up the kids dinner. You both laughing as he makes his mess like he does every night. You’ve come to notice artists like him can hardly do anything without making a mess it seems. And of course you eventually saying goodbye to him and sharing a look thats far too friendly & far too long for most duo’s… but not for you two of course
- Jesse texting you good morning every morning when he wakes up. Reminding you to hydrate & treat yourself nicely (and him texting you to take meds at the right time if you need to). But this slowly turning into goodnight texts & random daily check ins where he makes sure you’ve eaten… and gently encourages you if you haven’t yet
- Him also always walking you to your car, to your door, to any destination you need. 1. Because Jesse is a gentleman & 2. Because he always goes the extra mile to make sure you’re safe… you’re one of his best friends!! Of course he has to do this
- And just as dorkily, him sharing his schedule with you and walking you through it because he values you. Because he doesn’t want you to ever have to worry about him and always wants you to know where to find him or how to contact him
- Jesse becoming so tightly wrapped around your finger that while he goes on about his day he starts to see little parts of you in the world. Because you bring so much into his heart and mind that he can’t help but have his world view change a little. He buys you small things he finds, explaining to you why they reminded him of you. Sometimes its a small dinky plush toy he’s convinced captured the essence of your warmth- other times its a bracelet he swears up & down reminded him of your laugh. And you cant help but notice how gentle and careful his hands are… as he places the plush is your grasp or as he hooks the bracelet around your wrist- you feel the warm affection in his actions. The fondness he has for you feels so clear
- But yknow, you two are just good friends. He doesn’t reasonably have time for a relationship
- So it doesn’t mean anything when he pulls you into a hug and you notice that his perfume has actually changed a bit from when you initially met.. something more suited to your personal preference
- And it definitely doesn’t mean anything when his tone changes from irritated or authoritative or sassy with the boys- to just loving and gentle with you. It means nothing.
- And it means nothing that he makes sure you’re invited to every show, or that you’re allowed to rest in his dressing room, or that he likes for YOU to take his makeup off after shows. Because “you do it better” when in reality you both know it just feels lovely to have your hand gently holding his face… or how relieving it feels to,, to see Jesse finally open his tired eyes after you’ve cleaned them of eyeshadow.. and despite the clear exhaustion they’re filled with an unnamed fondness for you and only you… yeah! Thats nothing haha
- Or- at least it feels like nothing while his kids are out at a sleep over & he has a night to himself.. but he chooses to call you over anyway. And gets you to help him take care of his nails that he’s bitten away at with stress. It doesn’t even matter if you’re good at it, he’s going to be relaxed and limp in your grasp because he’s totally given in to you. It happens every night you two manage to be at his home alone. With him being locked away in the safety of his home, tucked inside on the warm couch with the best-… ‘whatever you are’ of his life. Jesse can’t help but go limb and relax, like some lazy cat
- you just have that affect on him. But it doesn’t matter
- None of it matters!
- Not the amount of time, not the fact that the band notices & invites you along for Jesse’s sake, not the fact that Jesse can’t go a day without a little bit if you now, not the fact that his kids ask for you to visit, not the fact that he thinks about you all the time… nope! None of it!
- Because he can’t put you through the burden of loving him
- He doesn’t want to drag you down every single night his brain or heart decides its time to fall apart again. He doesn’t want to lean on you and break you because he knows depending on people wholeheartedly hurts them.. he always ends up hurting them. He cant undo it, so he’s decided its better not to even try. He cant bare the thought of hurting you, or of scaring you with the severity of his problem. He doesn’t want to keep you up until early morning because he’s stuck in a mental loop for hours. He doesn’t want you to even think of feeling the need to help him with this- because its been years and years now,, and he just feels like no one can help it at this point
- Just like no one seems to help how his mind wanders in painful cycles of inappropriate thoughts and shame. How his body wants so much attention & none at all at the same time. How he cant interact with a lot of people and just feel normal about the little things that occur… that he cant always feel normal about you because his mind is just.. haunted in its own right.
- Except,, you do seem to help
- You don’t erase these problems. Not at all! You dont try because he doesn’t open up enough for you to truly know- but you dont need to. You know how to tell the difference between a tired expression & a broken down one… at least when it comes to Jesse. And you notice when his voice changes in the slightest way or what it means when his focus wanders too far from whats going on. And most importantly you know what to do
- You know how to start the process of Jesse grounding himself in the present moment. And its a serious of various small questions, subtle and easy ones. Small suggestions to do fun things together later on. You keeping him here, with you or with his kids or the band if they’re nearby. And from him? small touches on your hands or arms to help him ground himself as he plucks himself out of whatever funk he was in. You help. You dont solve his problems for him,, you just help him. Whether it be directly or through helping him help himself.
- Thats why it does matter when he sees you and he feels his heart flutter… or why it does matter when you both call & he pauses after you say hello- because every time he hears your voice he has to take a small moment to admire the way you sound (or if your mute/non-verbal, the way you look over video calls)
- Thats why it DOES matter that a day without you is a day he considers weird or out of place. And why it DOES matter that Jesse remembers the orders you like from different places. Its why it DOES matter that not only his kids, but he himself just… just loves you.
- Even if he wont say it out loud
Part 2 Coming Eventually ✨
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quodekash · 9 months
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this kid getting lost is such a mood
except for me its not "getting lost on the way to the top of a mountain that's really dangerous and far away to get to", it's more like "getting lost on the way to a friend's place who lives 15 minutes away, while they were trying to tell you where to go, and also whose house you have been to more times than you can count, but then you had to sit at a playground and wait for them to come pick you up because youre just that hopeless at navigation"
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WAIT THIS IS SO FUNNY
THEY'RE IN THE SAME PLACE AGAIN
THIS IS ABSOLUTELY SOMETHING I WOULD DO OML
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stop i might cry
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this kid is amazing
i would trust him to guide me into the afterlife
he could take over charon's job fr
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PLS I LOVE HIM SO MUCH
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im shivering so much rn, leeches give me the heebiejeebies more than like. anything
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i smell merch??
(side note: why are earth/phu's arms so veiny in that shot)
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i just love him so much
i hate children but i would adopt this one and take care of him better than hes ever been taken care of before
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HSDHSDHHDS
HIS ONE CHARACTER TRAIT IS LOVING HOW PRAN SMELLS AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH
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he's just so silly
their father/son dynamic will be the end of me
especially when i think about pat and his relationship with his actual dad :(
PLS EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS IS SO OVERDRAMATIC
PHU POINTING A GUN AT A BUSH WHEN ITS DEFINITELY JUST GONNA BE ONE OF THE LOST GUYS
PAT TRIPPING OVER A ROOT
PRAN AND TIAN GRIPPING FOR DEAR LIFE SO THAT THEY CAN MAKE IT UP A SLIGHT HILL
IF THEY LOSE THEIR GRIP, NOTHING WILL HAPPEN
ITS SO FUNNY TO ME
BUT ALSO ITS SO UNNECESSARILY DRAMATIC
AND THIS IS COMING FROM A DRAMA KID
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SEE????
i love him so much
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GUYS CALM DOWN OMG
I CANT STOP LAUGHING
ITS LITERALLY GOING TO BE FINE
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SEE????
also once again: his arm is so veiny???
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THEM <33333333
I LOVE THEM SO MUCH
GERHSGBDRHV
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these dramatic-ass gays
(i was gonna say something about the importance of grammar there and the hyphen needing to be where it is for it to be right / make sense, but "dramatic ass-gays" would also work)
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LOOK AT THEMMMMM
PHUTIAN WALKING WITH THEIR SON BETWEEN THEM LIKE THE DADS THEY ARE, AND THEIR ADOPTED SONS PATPRAN WALKING WITH THEIR ARMS AROUND EACH OTHER
THEY ALL MEAN SO MUCH TO ME
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wait how long were they gone for
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HIS SMILE <3
HIS DIMPLES <3
PAT'S FACE ON THE SIDE THERE <3
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T H E Y A R E D A D S
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are you sure about that
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theyre so important to me
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<3
i really want noodles now
its 1am and i want noodles
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theyre listening carefully to all the tea, tuning in to the drama
its just, some are more discreet about it than others
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look at this little guy
just enjoying his noodles while the adults do their adult things
i love him so very very much
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something about this image is just so funny to me
i think its the kid
i genuinely forgot his name
but i love him so much
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as a 158cm tall (5'2) person, i dont like how tall they all are
knowing that ohm is 186cm tall and nanon and earth are 183cm hurts me on a deep emotional level
theyre so small. theyre such tiny little silly guys. and yet theyre all more than 20cm taller than me.
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honestly i agree
he's wonderful
he's multi-talented
just like sound
by the way, soundwin = patpran and if you dont believe me, click here! (that was a seamless transition into a very casual self promo)
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holy hell i love this child so much
i would protect Kampung with my freaking life
i would die for him without a second thought
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i should also probably do that
my eyes keep going shut so then i need to pause the episode for like twelve seconds so i can get a little bit of sleep
its getting more and more difficult, though
i think ill finish in the morning, it's saturday tomorrow
goodnight!! bye-bye!!
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toastsnaffler · 1 month
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getting home from work and playing 5 straight hours of elden ring.... crops watered etc
#i love running around and hitting things with my big sword <3#ive just been fucking around exploring im a bit op for the areas im in at the mo so can usually do the minibosses in 1 attempt#logging off cuz its 1am but im gonna do crucible knight next tmr i think. and then check i havent missed anything else before godrick#wait also i should do the weeping evergaol cuz i unlocked that but didnt go in....#GOD there was this one horrid boss in one of the caves (i defeated first time but its moveset. scary shit in there)#and it did SO much blood damage by the time i defeated i was DRENCHED in red... ill share the screenshot tmr it was so funny#thal having a normal one.#ALSO i accidentally unlocked a lost grace near the very top of the map (stumbled into a transporter trap) and jesus CHRIST the map is BIG#originally it only showed a kind of square so i was thinking huh. ive actually covered a lot of it. but NOPE I HAVENT theres way way more#which is awesome :-) i was worried abt getting bored of it but nvm lol#i need to find a lvl 3 somber smithing stone as well theres gotta be one in these earlier areas SOMEWHERE.....#if not i have so many normal smithing stones i might just whack up the dismounter or whatever its called#the other curved greatsword i have. and just use that until i can upgrade bloodfang again#i wanna draw most of the main boss fights w my oc..... maybe. the designs are just all so gorg i keep getting distracted from the fights#ahhhh......#its so nice having an active interest to hyperfixate on ive missed this sm#but damn i need to go to bed its half 1 ive been up since 6:30 im craaazy..#goodnight every1#.diaries
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mrpenguinpants · 8 months
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I RETURN WITH LIFE UPDATE; I got Kaveh WITH ONE DAY LEFT ON THE BANNER! I also got Baizhu- BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY I GOT KAVEH
Also I failed the same course again (pain in stats) but I got an adhd diagnosis! Kinda! Diagnosis here is a little wack but I got a paper that says I got it but I function above the threshold of an official diagnosis (whatever that means) (I know what it means im a psych major but-) (I had to re-read my damn eval to find it)
I HOPE YOU'RE DOING WELL!!! I hope your crunch didn't crunch you, idk how time-passing works but I think you mentioned moving?? recently??? So I hope that went okay! If it didn't, I'll square up on the astral plane with whatever the issue is
ANYWAYS ITS 1AM IM GOING TO BED NOW GOODNIGHT
HOPE YOUR SLEEP SCHEDULE IS BETTER THAN MINE
HUG EMOJI
-Lucky
Wuh oh I’m answering these backwards but congrats again on Kazuha:D the good boy saw you struggling and decided to come at the very end after you sunk your life saving primos on him. Also that was my reaction to the Baizhu banner. Snake man is cool and all but have you seen that architect. The prettiest man in teyvat. ugh stats. No thanks bye. But nice lucky! I have no idea what any of that means, wtf is an above threshold have to do with this, but hey, we take those wins. But the move went pretty alright :D it only took a day so thank god, I was not ready to dedicate a week on top of everything but wow, moving sucks. my sleep schedule has actually gotten better by one day and it’s all about to come crashing down tonight :)
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