#also known as fucking BAATSHIT CRAZY

[simple-heroics]

Mind if I request a scenario where like miruko is meeting her girlfriend!readers older sister (who is a lot like Olivier Armstrong from Fullmetal alchemist)

..........*starts sweating in gays* FUCK y’all are trying to kill me with these Bad Bitch requests today. As if Mirko weren’t enough, you had to bring up the OG Olivier Armstrong.

Yeah. Okay. You might as well just introduce them and then walk straight outta the room to let them.... I dunno. Stare each other down for hours? Arm wrestle? Actually fight? Whatever they gotta do to establish dominance and figure out who the alpha is. 

Like, your girlfriend is Japan’s #5 hero and your big sister is a general? A colonel? Whatever her occupation, she’s used to being The Head Bitch In Charge™. And your girlfriend? Rumi knows she’s hot shit and sure as hell acts like it.

You sure they gotta meet? Jesus Christ, you might as well just throw some kerosene over gunpowder and flick a match on top.

For real. The first meeting is terrifying. They just  l o o k at each other for a couple minutes, completely stoic, saying nothing. Sizing each other up.

Then...this slow, wide, terrifying grin spreads across Rumi’s face. Crazy bitch probably licks her lips, too, because at last.

A Challenge.

Good news: You’ve found literally the one person who can’t be scared off by your big sister. Maybe Rum really is the One.

Bad news: Rumi met your sister. Your sister doesn’t take shit, and Rumi - love her, but gotta be real with y’all - is full of shit.

They’re fightin’.

And as if their Bad Bitch pissing contests weren’t bad enough, their personalities c l a s h. Rumi’s the crazy, goes-off-on-her-own-against-fucking-Nomu, tourniquets-her-fucking-arm-with-her-own-hair adrenaline junkie. Your uptight, serious, intimidating af older sister is a Woman in Charge of an entire company and will have order.

Again, in case you missed it: They’re fightin’. 

Your poor parents, man. They just want a nice family dinner with everyone but every time Rumi and their older daughter are in the same room, it’s chaos. Utter chaos. smdh just take ‘em out for a nice dinner while your batshit crazy girlfriend and near homicidal sister duke it out at the house.

The worst part? You wanna know the absolute WORST part? Rumi fucking loves it. She’s having a goddamn blast. She thrives off this kinda shit. SHE’S the one who ask, “Hey, when’s the next family get together? I wanna rematch with your sister.” 

Your sister isn’t too fond of her lbr the only time Rumi gets mad - actually mad - is when your older sister tries to even insinuate you two breaking up. Carrots ain’t gonna take that sitting down.

Oddly enough, though, it’s that fight in particular - the one over you - that finally earns your sister’s grudging respect. Anyone who puts up that fight for her sibling...is tolerable enough.

They’re still fightin’.

#bnha #bnha imagines #bnha headcanons #boku no hero academia #boku no hero imagines #bnha x reader #self insert fanfiction #self insert #mirko #miruko #rumi usagiyama #usagiyama rumi #rumi usagiyama x reader #usagiyama rumi x reader #rabbit hero: mirko #also known as fucking BAATSHIT CRAZY #mirko fuckers unite #thanks anon this was a lot of fun to write #i'm still chuckling over this dynamic #smdh #the sheer c h a o s #mirko thrives in it