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hybridequalist · 3 years

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Thinking Out Loud (Part 4)

Okay, so I ended up lying. This is a few months late to the cross-post from AO3. (Link here) But in any case, here it is if you prefer to read on tumblr.

Previous Chapter (tumblr link)

Taglist: @nesli26, @manga-crazy, @venomemes, @galleyleelol, @makingtimemine, @jackie-sugarskull, @nightshade7117, @skysthelimit291, @randomshizzles101, @inumorph, @snow-massacre, @phantom-fangirl-stuff, @pixellated-sparks, @vsalamandor2, @otaku-mai, @snarky-badger

You woke up slowly, feeling heavy from a deep, dreamless sleep. The apartment was eerily quiet aside from a faint scraping sound repeating over and over. Your psychic “hearing” took a minute to focus on the three minds in the other room, but once it did, you were overwhelmed by the internal conversation Eddie and Venom were having.

“I LIKE THIS FEMALE. WE SHOULD OFFER OUR PROTECTION TO HER. ”

“I don’t think that would go over well. Remember the last time we were tased? ”

“SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO KNOW. ”

“Consent is important buddy. Not to mention we don't wanna freak out the tenants either."

Lauren's thoughts were more structured--she was writing her words down and concentrating on that communication. However, that didn't stop her from sneaking glances at Eddie and sizing him up, trying to guess details about his life and personality. Currently she was sneaking glances at his biceps...for some reason you really didn’t want to dwell on too long.

"EDDIE, I HEAR HER," Venom whispered to his host. Like, actually whispered; his mental voice was somehow quieter than usual.

“She’s awake? That was faster than I thought. She seem ok? ”

“I THINK SHE’S LISTENING IN. MORSEL, IF YOU ARE, GO AHEAD AND KEEP RESTING. WE WILL OCCUPY THE COLORFUL FEMALE .”

The last two words were accompanied by a mental image of Lauren with an intense focus on her vibrant hair and current choice of large earrings. You also caught the tail end of a thought that was very distinctly non-human and carried traces of a predatory desire to grab the shiny, colorful things. Eddie’s thoughts quickly curbed it--a nonverbal suppression that Venom agreed with.

You slumped back into the mattress, turning your gaze inward as you stretched and assessed your body.

You were a little sore, especially in your chest. The hyperventilation from the panic attack really did a number on you it seemed. Your hands also felt a little stiff in the joints, but it didn’t hurt to move them.

Panic attacks didn’t always end up hurting after the fact, but it wasn’t wholly uncommon. Fatigue was usually the worst aftereffect, your body struggling to recover from your survival response to an imagined threat. It sometimes went away after a good sleep, but today was going to be one of those days where the heaviness settled into your bones and made even the smallest tasks far more tiring than they ought to be.

The once-over complete, you decided you were up for leaving the bed...but not the blanket, which dragged on the floor after you like a fluffy train. You gently pushed open the door and poked your head out, peering at the kitchen down the hall, catching sight of Eddie's leather jacket at the corner of the table.

A jolt of nerves coiled in your stomach and you pulled the blanket cloak around you a little tighter. With Eddie and Venom’s attention focused mostly on Lauren, their thoughts didn’t reflect what they thought of your panic attack. What if they thought you were pathetic? Or too fragile to be around? What if they had never seen a panic attack and thought you were somehow sick?

“EDDIE, SHE’S UP. SHE’S IN THE HALL. HER BREATHING WENT ALL FUNNY AGAIN. ”

Venom’s rumbling thoughts broke through the returning panic spiral. With effort, you stepped out from the hallway and into Lauren’s line of sight. Eddie caught your gaze, brow furrowed, but before you could properly react to him, your landlady took up your view.

Lauren looked you up and down, appraising your condition. While her face seemed only lightly concerned, her thoughts were at war: her motherly tendency to worry battled with her desire to give you space and the noverbal clash of feelings was giving you secondhand mental whiplash.

“Do you need something to eat? Or drink?” she signed. You replied with the sign for water and she bustled off to fill a glass.

“So, uh,” Eddie started, then paused, looking for the right words to finish his question. He finally went with: “How are you doin’ right now? Did your rest do you any good?”

You nodded and sat next to him at the table, reaching for the notepad he and Lauren had used before your arrival.

I’m achy, but otherwise fine now. Mostly.

“YOU WERE HIGHLY DISTRESSED. DID SOMETHING HAPPEN? CAN WE STOP IT FROM HAPPENING TO YOU AGAIN? ”

Venom’s concern felt...oddly directed. He didn’t fully understand what had happened and Eddie’s explanations hadn’t entirely cleared up his confusion. He was under the impression that someone had threatened you or you had some logical reason to freak out. He wanted to find the source of that stress and remove it, like pulling out a thorn.

Mindful that Lauren would probably read whatever you wrote down later, you set about composing your explanation.

It was a panic attack. Sometimes there’s a reason, but most of the time, I start thinking about something stressful and it gets so overwhelming my body reacts like I’m actually in danger.

Eddie and Venom conferred briefly about your explanation and suddenly the symbiote had a new question. You felt your gut twist as you felt the guilt his thoughts now carried.

“DID WE DO THAT TO YOU? DID WE FRIGHTEN YOU OR STRESS YOU? ”

Again, you were careful with your words.

It wasn’t anything you directly said or did. It was more about the prospect of being in a social situation at all. I don’t go out much, so I started overthinking the minor details. It spiraled really quickly from there.

Lauren put down a tall glass of ice water on the table in front of you. You signed your thanks, put down the pen and gulped the cool liquid, savoring the relief it brought your scratchy throat.

“How long was I asleep?” you asked Lauren.

“4 hours.”

“You’ve been talking to Eddie for 4 hours?!”

“He has to write really slow for me to read it. His normal handwriting is too messy. Plus, we took a lunch break.”

Lunch break?! You snatched the pen back up.

I’m so sorry I had to miss out on the lunch. You wanted to show me something and

Eddie’s hand intercepted yours, not grabbing it but rather gently holding you back from writing any more. It was only a moment of skin contact, but it made a jolt run through you and immediately snagged your attention.

“Don’t worry about it. Honestly, I’m just glad you’re ok and gonna be getting better. We can reschedule if you want. No problem.”

You instinctively glanced up, looking for his thoughts. You found nothing but sincerity from Eddie. Venom was....well, you weren’t actually sure what he was thinking. On a surface level, he agreed with his host, but underneath that there was some lingering frustration. The symbiote had apparently been really excited to show you something and this forced patience wasn’t entirely sitting well with him.

You carefully moved Eddie’s still-hovering hand and started on a new line.

What about the stuff you wanted to talk about? You wrote, uncertainty and guilt still gnawing at you.

“It can wait. Seriously. My buddy wasn’t even really ready to show off his new trick; he gets excited easy.”

“I SPENT ALL NIGHT PRACTICING! I AM TOTALLY READY! APOLOGIZE! ”

“You’re ready, Vee, but it’s my hands you need if you want to show her in public. And it’s a little soon to invite her to the apartment. ”

“SHE’S ALREADY BEEN TO THERE. I DON’T SEE WHAT THE HOLD UP IS .”

“Those...were extenuating circumstances. And besides, it was more you than me that brought her there. In any case, she’s still getting to know us and I want her to get used to us in public before we do any of your other ideas. ”

It was amazing how quickly they could turn the conversation internal and how much it resembled a verbal discussion rather than truly sharing thoughts. Was it because they knew you were listening? Or was it just their natural state when switching from direct talking to others to each other?

Eddie caught sight of you looking and gave an awkward smile.

“Sorry to keep secrets, but--”

He was interrupted by a ringtone blaring from his jacket. He sighed heavily and snatched his phone.

“It’s my boss. I got an interview in an hour. Sorry to say that I gotta run. I’ll text you later, so go ahead and take it easy for a bit. I’ll leave you to your landlady’s care.”

He waved to Lauren as he answered his phone, turning on his heel to leave. Venom mentally grumbled but gave a nonverbal farewell directed at you. You stared after them long after the door closed, uncertain what to think.

Lauren sat next to you and started signing.

“Well, now I know why you called him a hot mess. Emphasis on the hot.”

You hated how fast your cheeks flushed.

#venom #venom movie #fanfiction #fanfic #reader #venom x reader #selectively mute character #deaf character #hybridwrites

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miyusawafanfics-blog · 5 years

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Baby, Baby!

「 Baby, Baby! 」

❝Pretzel twist!❞

It was an ordinary day in the dorms of Seidou Baseball Club. Nothing could even get as ordinary as this for the morning alarm of everyone was still Kuramochi and Sawamura's wrestling larks.

❝Ah! My bones are breaking!❞ Sawamura whined, tapping the floor in panic. He was surrendering already for he knew that fighting the shortstop would only lead to more broken bones―which he could not afford to had, especially if he wanted to catch up with Furuya, and be the ace.

Pulling himself away from the first year, Kuramochi laughed in triumph, pumping his fist on the air, ❝Kyahaha! You are too weak, Sawamura!❞

The mentioned southpaw just pouted while rubbing his arm, glaring at his roommate menancingly. It was not like he was complaining or something, but Kuramochi would be the best upperclassman if he would only stop practicing his wrestling moves on Sawamura.

❝You, apparently, attacked me while I was sleeping!❞ Sawamura retorted, glaring at Kuramochi without any intention to give some respect.

Well, it was not like Sawamura was respectful from the first place, anyways. The pitcher was a walking trouble, but every soul in the team would agree that the said man's presence was already necessary for the team.

Kuramochi stood up from his current position on the floor before stretching his arms. He gently kicked Sawamura's shin as to give an indirect implication that the southpaw should alreadtly get moving, as well.

❝If I didn't do that, you won't wake up.❞ The shortstop reasoned out, pointing at Sawamura accusingly, ❝Have you forgotten what day is it today?❞

Uh, it wasn't like Sawamura intentionally forgotten the event that day, but he was fatigued from the late night practice yesterday thus resulting his mind to shut down any impending occurence.

But still he had forgotten so the first year used his puppy eyes to apologize on his roommate, ❝Sorry.❞ He muttered with a pout.

Kuramochi knew that it would come. He certainly knew that the idiotic pitcher would use his puppy eyes to get away with this. He already had prepared himself, but knowing his huge brotherly complex towards Sawamura, he had just lost the battle of endurance, yet again.

❝Fine, get ready. We will go out with the other folks, remember now?❞

It was a hasty recollection, but Sawamura patently remembered the agreement that he, Kuramochi, Miyuki and the third years talked about before going to sleep last night. They would go outside and would had some fun because they finally had a three-day break before training.

❝Ugh, I forgot! I will get ready now!❞ Sawamura frustratingly messed his hair up before climbing down of his bed.

Kuramochi could only watch him with a sigh. The southpaw would be in trouble if no one would watch over him. What was he, some kind of a toddler?

Seriously, Sawamura. Seriously.

―――

The crew was already in the mall, and they were having the time of their life. They messed around, bought whatever they wanted, and ate together in the food. It was going all to well according to the plan that Kuramochi got a feeling that something incredulous would happen.

❝Oi, Sawamura! Carry these bags!❞ Jun yelled, motioning for the mentioned first year to carry the shopping bags. Seriously, though, why were they shopping too much? They were not even girls, duh.

But, being the only first year in the bunch, Sawamura had no choice but to follow the command. He pouted, getting the bags from Jun, ❝Is this the only reason why you invited me to come?❞ It is obvious that the southpaw was already sulking at this point.

Laughing his head off due to Sawamura's escapades, Miyuki snaked his arm around the brunette's shoulders.

❝We are such great senpais, aren't we?❞ Miyuki snickered, eyeing the pitcher who just huffed his cheeks at the process. The catcher was tempted to pinch those cheeks if they were not only exposed on the public's eyes.

Still moping, Sawamura shoved away Miyuki, and decided to walk away from the group. He wanted to threw all of the bags, but he knew very well that he would be reprimanded upon having ill discipline.

❝Sawamura, let me help you.❞

The southpaw was stopped on his tracks when Chris suddenly held his shoulder. Ah, what a saviour, indeed.

Having all googly eyes for his favourite upperclassman, Sawamura immediately yelped a loud, ❝Master!❞ showing his gratitude towards the said third year.

Beside Chris was Tetsu, looking at Sawamura firmly. He was not saying anything, but the pitcher knew for himself that the captain would also help him. Even if he had some bastard senpai, there were still some who could Sawamura rely, afterall.

Tears were visible on the edge of Sawamura's lids. He was so thankful that these two upperclassmen were ready to help him at any cost. He was about to express his gratitude, but he was cut off.

❝Nii-san! You are a pitcher, aren't you?❞

Sawamura blinked repeatedly, feeling a soft tug on the hem of his shirt. Looking down, Sawamura saw a boy―a kid who was about four years old―grinning widely at him.

The southpaw was not someone to resist a kid. It was not unknown that Sawamura had a huge heart, so it really was not a surprise for him to acknowledge the sudden presence.

❝Do I look like one?❞ The brunette grinned, crouching down as to level with the boy. He was jut happy that his form or maybe something about him was recognizable as a pitcher. Whatever may the reason be, Sawamura was just too happy to be recognized. ❝But yeah, I am a pitcher.❞

❝What is this? You have caught the attention of a brat, Sawamura?❞ Kuramochi asked, he and the other guys were approaching the pitcher.

❝Heh, this idiot's charm only works for children.❞ Miyuki said teasingly, looking at Sawamura with a smug expression. But, his cool façade was immediately prompted away when Kuramochi snickered, ❝Miyuki is a kid then?❞

This lark between the two went on for a few minutes, but Sawamura decided to just ignore them and to focus on the child in front of him.

❝Hn! If you are a pitcher, then this is for you!❞ The boy grinned toothily, giving a baseball on the southpaw's opened palm.

Sawamura stared at the ball on his hand. He had hold a lot of balls in his life―including his Kazuya's balls, ehem―but this one felt rather strange. He could not pinpoint what because it just looked ordinary.

Maybe it was the weight? But, no. The weight was just right. There was something else which was bugging the brunette, restlessly. Well, maybe he was just thinking too much, right? There was no way a harmless kid could do something to him, anyways.

Before Sawamura could say thank you to the kid, he saw a flash of letters suddenly being written on the ball that he was holding.

❝What―❞

He could not believe his eyes. There, on the same ball that was given to him by a rather peculiar kid, were words which abruptly appeared out of nowhere.

『 Sawamura Eijun, have a good night sleep. 』

And without any further ado, his lids became heavier. There was no room left for resistance. Darkness consumed him right then and there.

❝Sawamura!❞

―――

Miyuki could not even comprehend what happened.

One second, Sawamura received a ball from an unknown kid. The next was the kid suddenly ran away, and even before their shortstop could follow him, he totally vanished out of sight. And then now...

Their pitcher just suddenly lost consciousness, going completely limp. Fortunately, Miyuki was able to react accordingly, catchinf Sawamura even before he hit the floor.

❝Oi, Sawamura!❞ The catcher shook his boyfriend's shoulders repeatedly. He knew that he could not let panic to overtook his senses, but it was difficult to remain calm when he did not know what happened. He could not even reason out to himself that everything would be fine because as he stared at Sawamura's unmoving form, he bacame more and more frantic.

Then there was a hand who touched his shoulder, halting his motions into naught.

❝Miyuki, calm down.❞ Chris voiced entered his cognition. He was sure that the third year was worried by the tone of his voice.

But how would he calm down if he didn't know what in hell was happening to his boyfriend? Heck, he was just teasing the latter awhile ago about having a kid fan, and now this? None of this made any sense.

Due to his current state, Miyuki felt hid glasses getting foggy. Oh, no. It was his eyes that were swimming on tears.

He opened his mouth, croaking on the process, ❝S-Sawamura... He... What happened?❞ The catcher could not even properly form his sentence. He could not think rationally, as well.

❝Miyuki Kazuya!❞

See? He could even hear a toddler's voice when there was clearly no baby with them.

❝Stop squeezing me, Miyuki Kazuya!❞

Wait, what?

Miyuki looked at the form that he was craddling on his arms, and if he could only cuss every known curses in the world, he already did so.

He tried to shout, but he failed his attempt. His voice was caught in his throat, and he could not force them out. He was too horrified beyond any comprehension.

The catcher was just lucky that his shock was voiced out by the other upperclassman.

❝What the fuck just happened to Sawamura? Why is he a baby right now?!❞

Yeah, in some unknown circumstances, Sawamura Eijun suddenly became a toddler―and a rather cute one.

―――

❝I want some ice cream!❞ The four-year old Sawamura mentioned, pointing at the ice cream vendor.

Miyuki could not help but to let out a sigh. The others made him to watch over the pitcher while they ran back to Seidou to tell the coach personally about what happened to their boisterous first year.

The little Sawamura clutched his finger, his whole fist is covering only one of Miyuki's fingers, tugging the catcher as to get his attention.

❝Yeah, I got it. We will buy ice cream.❞ Miyuki let out an exasperated sigh, brushing his hair backwards. It was not like he didn't appreciate this rare chance wherein his boyfriend became a toddler, and he could squeal all over his cuteness, but no. The catcher was even more worried if his Sawamura would even came back on being an adult.

The little southpaw's face suddenly brightened up. His chubby cheeks were stretched widely while he was stomping on the ground, happily.

Miyuki would not deny that he smiled at the sight. Damn, his boyfriend would never fail on amusing him no matter which form he was in.

Kneeling down to face Sawamura properly, Miyuki ruffled the toddler's hair out of affection. ❝Aren't you such a cutie?❞ Miyuki praised.

And since it was Sawamura, it was to be expected that the squirt loved the compliment all too much that he became too elevated, jumping into Miyuki's arms abruptly. The catcher didn't fail to catch his pitcher, of course. He was a catcher for a reason, afterall.

Sawamura leaned and kissed Miyuki's cheek, making the both of them to blush darkly.

❝I like Kazu-chan!❞

With the sudden announcement, Miyuki broke into fits of smile. He would even admit that his heart was thumping really loudly against his ribcage.

❝Ei-chan likes Kazu-chan more than he likes ice cream?❞ Miyuki probed, grinning widely when he saw how confuse Sawamura became. The kid looked back and forth from Miyuki to the ice cream vendor before he pouted, cheeks puffing.

❝I...❞ Sawamura mumbled, rubbing his tiny nose on Miyuki's. ❝I like Kazu-chan more.❞ Before giving a cute and small peck on Miyuki's lips.

Even before Miyuki could react to that illegal cuteness, Sawamura jumped out of the catcher's hold, and then he grinned widely, ❝Be my wife, Miyuki Kazuya!❞

Miyuki blinked repeatedly, could not believe what he was hearing.

His boyfriend―who became a toddler―just proposed to him, right? Like, proposed―getting married? Yeah, right.

❝When you grow up, I will surely marry you, idiot.❞ Miyuki said with a glint on his glasses. He is smilimg way too much, watching how the toddler squealed out of glee.

It was a sincere answer, though. Miyuki had always told himself that if it was Sawamura then he's willing to go all throughout and marry the mentioned southpaw.

❝Well? Let's buy an ice cream now.❞

❝Yeah!❞

Maybe, Sawamura as a toddler was not that bad at all.

Later that night, Miyuki slept with the little southpaw beside him. Sawamura didn't want to go anywhere without the catcher that everyone just agreed for them to sleep together.

And to Miyuki's surprise, he woke up with long limbs tangled with his. Sawamura―the teen one―was laying on top of him, face buried on his neck.

Ah, what an eventful day.

Miyuki silently thanked the little brat who gave Sawamura the mysterious and magical ball. Because afterall, he had experienced something which he thought would never happened.

❝Miyuki Kazuya, let's get married.❞ Sawamura said when he woke up, looking at Miyuki expectantly.

The catcher could only chuckle.

This Sawamura Eijun was still the best for him.

END.

#miyusawa #misawa #miyuki x sawamura #miyuki kazuya #eijun sawamura #diamond no ace #ace of diamond #baby sawamura #fluff #cute #eijun week

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