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jokeroutsubs · 5 months

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We want to wish everyone a happy 1 month anniversary since the Stožice concert! 🥰💗

This is a translation of an online article published today, 6.11.2023, by Suzy magazine, a subsidiary of the Slovenian newspaper Slovenske novice. The author of the article is Polona Bohorič.

Audio version by IG Gboleyn123 can be also listened on Spotify, iTunes, and other podcast platforms.

ODE TO JOKER OUT

What do these guys have that is lacking in the world?

Respect. To everyone. To their roots. To the world. Compassion. The desire to be human. Playfulness. That inexhaustible companion of creativity.

[Photo caption: They give off the feeling of an old, well-rehearsed rock band. PHOTO: Mediaspeed]

Fever

I actually don't even remember when and how I got the Joker Out fever. What attracted me? The lyrics for sure, words have always been a sacred tie for me, a fundamental element. Rhythms and melodies were not far behind. Likeable. Enough to awaken my attention, followed by curiosity and then the excitement of discovery.

Charisma, honesty, open-mindedness. The incredibly complementary collection of members, both in personality and in their image, works as if they had been put together by some giant professional American or English production company. But they have built themselves. Step by step, as it seems, since childhood... With resolution. With learning. With a freshness of their own which is brimming in them, and which they are showering over people far and wide... Material that is good enough to set one small country on fire. And this fever knows no bounds and it is spreading.

In a world where we are all the media, it's not that hard to create one hit. But keeping and stacking the material to maintain and even increase the temperature is a task that many have already undertaken. Only few succeed.

The first time I heard the song "Novi Val", which is becoming the anthem of a whole generation, I was as struck as if I had opened a textbook with instructions on how to exist and at the same time embrace life. Youth is always finding it's own way, circumstances are constantly changing. The rebellion of yesterday is not the same as the rebellion of today. However, the inner strength that drives the world forward is the same.

[Photo caption: What do these boys have that is lacking in the world? Surely something profound, something that every young heart naturally longs for. PHOTO: Mediaspeed]

Authenticity

There are five of them. Five points of a star.

Their roles in the five-pointed community are so natural. It doesn't matter who occupies which place, when or why, but more importantly that they blend in with the others- just as the points in a star blend together. What matters is that everyone enjoys it. Playing, complementing. And growing. I perceive them as coexisting in total acceptance of one another.

If they have made their way to the stage by by walking the road laid before them by their role models, this influence has brought them to a point where they seem to have found not just each other, but their own star.

One role stands out despite their unity. This role is not called frontman for nothing. He is simply in the foreground. Born for the stage, regardless where or with whom, but at the same time a sensitive soul and a perfectionist. I was struck by how subtly he slowly turned the stage spotlights onto his friends in the band, so that they all came out of their shells or got rid of their reservations. The wisdom of a leader, hats off.

Mastery

The boys are precise and skilled in their work, although (or maybe because of it) their performances in smaller clubs seem casual, as if they had just dropped in on their way. Their mileage of being onstage is noticeable. They give off the feeling of an old, well-rehearsed rock band. But the magic happens when the audience feels that the pleasure is theirs. The wave that lights up on the stage ripples in both directions.

[Photo caption: Bojan Cvjetićanin, born for the stage, regardless where or with whom, but at the same time a sensitive soul and a perfectionist. FOTO: Mediaspeed]

A crowd of a few hundred or a few thousand - there is no great difference in the response - is spellbound from the first to the last chord. This desire to move with everyone on and below the stage is more than the individual bras, bracelets and glasses, which are already becoming a collection. It is a powerful force of invisibly woven feelings, emotions, memories and visions. It is the enthusiasm of youth, regardless of age.

Who is part of the generation of love and hope? The Stožice stadium gave me the answers.

A six-year-old girl, sitting calmly cross-legged on a slightly raised technical prop in the arena, silently moves her lips with each word in the song, and as the boys leave the stage, she wisely observes, "It's not over yet. Carpe diem is still missing."

Her father, who looks at her with wide-eyed pride.

Thirteen-year-old best friends, accompanied by one of their mothers, experiencing the ecstasy of each song individually? Their own experience follows the band and the stage, and with the obligatory recording on the phone, they sing to each other, confessing and commanding each verse, with the full conviction that it is theirs.

The mother is stoically tolerating what is happening, obviously aware of the importance of this moment for her daughter.

In the stands, the seats are not filled because all the ticket holders are on their feet, dancing, singing. And they undulate. Fans and admirers in a crowded fan pit, who have been preparing for this moment of unity for six, eight, ten months.

Friends and colleagues of the five guys, scattered all over the arena, keeping a watchful eye on every move.

Two ladies in their fifties, standing next to a fence, dancing and reliving their youth.

[Photo: Mediaspeed]

Slovenia, Europe, the world. Twenty-seven countries are present in one space and united in one chorus. An ode to youth, rebellion, trust and determination. It lasts for two hours in this place, but lives in the heart in each moment, pulsating in a single beat.

No, it is not hypnosis, it is a wave of hope and trust. A belief that youth can do anything. This youth is not really defined by numbers.

Values

What do these guys have that is lacking in the world? Surely something deep, something that every young heart naturally longs for. When it merges into the same river with them, that deepness can be drunk in long draughts.

Respect. To everyone. To their roots. To the world.

Compassion. The desire to be human.

Playfulness. That inexhaustible companion of creativity.

Cooperation and cohesion. Powerful weapons to prevent the ego from growing like a wild weed.

The ability to maintain distance without arrogance. The ability to accept without becoming greedy.

Gratitude and modesty. These two keep your feet firmly on the ground.

[Photo: Mediaspeed]

Courage and hope. Two invincible forces that help to spur and tame even the wildest horses and lift them up to the unknown, the incredible, the dreamlike.

I perceive their strong mindsets through their gestures, words, concerts, interviews. Although it is quite clear how responsibly and professionally they have embarked on their journey, I hope that the weight of what they have already experienced does not press them into too much deliberation about the way forward. I sincerely wish them to remain in tune with their authenticity: childishly mischievous, youthfully seductive and juicily mature.

This world is already all theirs ...

-~-~-~

Translation by @kurooscoffee. DO NOT REPOST!

#joker out #jokeroutsubs #JOSpodcasts #bojan cvjeticanin #kris gustin #jan peteh #jure macek #nace jordan #bojan cvjetićanin #jure maček #kris guštin

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notafraidofredyellowandblue · 8 months

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so I've heard in the past that some members of the band have hinted at not being 100% straight and richard has given hints at wanting to know what it's like to be a woman, could you please give me some sources to those since I've looked everywhere and can't really find them? thank you, if not, it's totally understandable

Another really really old ask, not because i didn't want to, but because i wanted to findas much info as possible 🌺 sorry anon for taking so long..

Well, the most recent 'hint' was Flake's podcast with topic 'gay/lesbian' where he mentioned that the topic came up one evening when the band were chatting and it turned out they all had their experiences 🥰

Rammstein is imo a band who has always been very 'inclusive' in any sexual preferences, and especially in Till's lyrics you can tell he is very interested in anything out there (not that that makes him 'not straight' (to be honest, i think he is, by some other quotes in interviews 😊) but i wouldn't be surprised if he tried some stuff somewhere in life).

Richard did an 2010 interview in Canada (don't have a link to the original, just this transcript) where he was quoted (about 'Mann gegen Mann')

"Actually, Till showed the lyrics to our Gay community, to our friends, just to make sure, because if you talk about something that you not really are, it's always kind of hard. Sometimes you cross the line, you don't think about it, but it could be offensive. If you do something because it's your experience, it's fine, but if you write something and you're not actually a part of it, I think you should make sure that everything you want to say is right. So he gave the lyrics to some friends, and they were very approving."

Which sort of confirms that they don't see themselves as gay so much. Also in interviews where they were asked 'are you gay', they usually end up with 'no'... interestingly, i don't think i've seen an interview where an interviewer explicitely asked 'are you bisexual' 🌺 (by the way, i would be really surprised if Richard hadn't some experience with a guy when he was younger, i vaguely remember he alluded to such in a really old interview, but i don't have a link).

Richard indeed has expressed ideas about his feminine side several times, in the interbiew above he says for instance

"If you talk to me right now, I'm a big believer in getting myself in balance between the female and the male side. I have a female side too, obviously."

And very striking was in several interviews ca 2021 after he did the cover 'Always on my mind' with Till for the Emigrate album 'The Persistence of Memory' and then made it a duet, stating:

"I mean, obviously, Till has also this very characteristic voice. And then it was pretty fast. He recorded one day. And then I was listening to it, and I felt a little bit that his performance was a little bit too male-oriented. So I felt I need a little female touch to it. So that’s why my personality came in. And I think it’s a good combination"

So he felt a female touch was needed, and added his own voice to Till's track 🥰

And ofcourse in 2023 he shared on his ig

"I've always wondered what it's like to be a woman"

Now ofcourse this could just be a Kruspe-caption 😊 but with the 'DT' video in mind and his role in it, it makes one wonder doesn't it... where is that making of when we need it 🌺😊

---

From the others i don't have quotes at hand...sorry...but maybe someone else has and is willing to share 🌺

#rammstein lgbtq matters #rammstein and the feminine side #quotes #till lindemann #richard kruspe #rammstein #flake lorenz

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coconutbabydoll · 9 months

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ೀ-one last time

pairing: abby anderson x fem!reader

warnings: reader is a cheater, open ending, bad grammar, lack of vocabulary lol that’s it i think. don’t keep scrolling i’ll get better over time!!

summary: so one last time i need to be the one who takes you home ;) (lyrics from the song bbg)

a/n: okay so it took me like 5 days to write this , please please interact likes,reblogs, and comments are appreciated but not mandatory!! if there any grammar, punctuation, mispelling lmk!! i would listen to the song after reading this but it is a popular song you probably already heard of it. also is this giving wattpad core ?? that’s like my biggest fear, okay shutting up posting this and now i’m throwing my phone across the room!!

it’s becoming more and more physically impossible to pull yourself away from your bed. only thing inducing you to get up was your nine to five job. you sighed and wearily pushed your hands on the bed and looked at your pillow. there was a big wet spot on your pillow. why were you crying? you were the one who messed up, you were the one who lied, it’s been five months why couldn’t you just get over it. you jumped off your bed and walked over to vanity desk and grabbed your phone. immediately you clicked on the instagram icon, for the past five months this became apart of your daily routine, abby. you tried to resist stalking her page but she was really unforgettable. you scrolled through all of her gym photos, photos with friends , and photos and videos she still had up of the two of you. you didn’t really know what that meant, at first you thought it meant she missed you, so you tired to contact her but she always left you on seen. you clicked on her profile picture icon to see what she posted on her story.

oh, you didn’t see that coming. it was photo of her and some girl, the girl was kissing her on the cheek and her arms wrapped around abby neck while abby made duck face, one hand holding the phone towards a bathroom mirror and the other on the girls waist.

the picture was caption: happy two months baby!! i love you more than words can explained :)

two months? so it only took her three months to get over you while your suffering everyday, always wishing you go back five months in time so you could take back that one moment that’s been repeating in your head every single day , that moment wasn’t even the worst part it was abby little puppy dog eyes when she found out, god you felt so awful then, all you wanted to do was stick a knife down your throat, you still do now.

you swipe off of instagram and deleted the app, you got enough of that. you open your message app and texted your boss telling her that you had fever and you weren’t able to make it, you needed a little break. you’ve been working nonstop for five months , you needed something to distract your mind.

it was a friday after all, just because abby moved on doesn’t mean you have to spend it depressed and cooped up in your bed. maybe you could hang out with your friends, you still had a decent amount of those. actually no, all your friends were shared with abby and if they still talk to abby, which they most certainly do, they would know abby’s girlfriend. if you asked to hangout with them, they would invite abby and she would invite her girlfriend, absolutely not. maybe a frat party, there was a decent amount of those too, a perfect way to meet new people and to get over somebody, you used to go to a lot. thats actually how you meant abby , that’s how you lost her too.

the thing was you have been so out of the mix lately, you haven’t heard the word frat party since five months ago. there always a party on friday, right? dina, dina, dina, dina, she would know she goes to almost everyone. plus you guys still keep in contact. you open your message app and clicked her contact name.

y/n: hey dee, is there a frat party going on tonight? cs i kinda wanna go to one, pls lmk

dee: oh wowww looks who finally wants to come out their shell, haha yes there is one at 11 can i come over a 10 with some stuff so we can get ready??

y/n: yea sound great

now what to do till ten, you could get up and get some coffee, walk to the park, make some breakfast, read a book. nope, you decided to download instagram again , log back into your account and stalk abby. you sighed, was it really that easy for her to forget about you, get over you? maybe she wasn’t over you, she still had your pictures up! messaging her again wouldn’t hurt, you thought.

you click on the message button and look at all your previous messages, all of them including an “i’m sorry, please just listen to me.” your only contact with her was instagram because she blocked you everywhere else. you were always puzzled as to why she blocked you everywhere else but not instagram. you hesitated before typing and deleted a couple of sentences and finally you were satisfied.

“hey abby, i’m sorry to bother you on your anniversary and stuff but i just want to tell you somethings i felt like i really didn’t have time to explain, first of all i’m truly and deeply sorry from like the bottom of my heart. it was never my intentions to hurt you , it just happen i was drunk out of my mind and the whole time i thought about you, i hated myself for doing that to you and i wanted to tell you before she did but i chocked imma fucking coward i know , i’m sorry abby. i don’t deserve you at all but i miss you.”

it’s not like she actually was going to reply but you still wanted to express yourself, what you really wanted was her to forgive you but that’s never going to happen. you still had several hours left before dina came over , you decided to take a nap.

⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂

you were woken up to the static of your intercom, you whined and look for your phone with your hands scavenging around your bed. your eyes were dazzled by the brightness of your phone screen, it was 10:13 and you had loads of text from dina, you got up and pressed the door button to your intercom and open your apartment door and stood at the threshold.

“how long are your staying?” you sarcastically questioned dina as she walked up the stairs with a travel suitcase.

“i brung options, i know how picky you are.”

when dina walked in she gazed around your apartment, like she’s never been in there before.

“i feel like i haven’t been in here forever, it still looks the same.” you let out a little chuckle.

“i brought everything, shirts, shorts, skirts, dresses, jeans. here pick out what you want,” she shoved the suitcase towards you. “imma gonna to do my hair in the bathroom.”

you tugged on the zipper moving it around the suitcase and opened the top, you eyes were met with a variety collection of clothes. you didn’t really think about what to wear. a nice top and shorts would be fine. before you had the chance to grab an outfit you heard your phone buzz, you reached over and grabbed it- no fucking way! abby had message you back, we’re you dreaming ? you took the back of your hand and firmly rubbed your eyes, gazed back at your screen and nope this is real, quickly you clicked on the message and your phone automatically unlocks.

“can you stop, no like actually i had enough. all those other messages i ignored, but cmon on my fucking anniversary. my girlfriend and i are happy and i don’t need you back in my life. i don’t need any source of reminder of you. doesn’t matter how many times you say sorry it doesn’t take back what you did! and i asked you and you lied! stop it i don’t care anymore, leave me alone before i block you, this shit is super annoying.”

geez that was awful, we’re you really that annoying? you were just trying to express yourself, she never gave you chance to actually explain she just went off of what the girl told her, but you did lie and what did you expect? for everything to be all happy and sunshine, for her to read your message and want to get back together? but there no actually way that sh-

“what are you doing?” dina giggled as she walked in the living area, her hair was straightened down with a middle part. you didn’t realize how long and deep you had been into your thoughts, fuck that was embarrassing.

“nothing, i was just thinking about um some stuff.”

“well can you think about what your going to wear, cmon let’s go!”

⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂

this party’s stinks, no like actually it stinks, it smells like sweat, must, and ass. and you weren’t really having fun, a couple of people try to flirt with you and got some girls number, made out with like two of them but none of them gave you that same tingly feeling you had when you met abby.

“dee, i’m gonna head to the bathroom,” you informed dina, she waved you off and continued talking with some guy, the three of y’all were sitting on some torn up leather couch along with some others. you were scrolling on your phone the whole time, and peeling the leather off of the couch. you made your way upstairs where you assumed the bathroom would be and it was, there wasn’t a line but someone was in there, so you patiently waited on the side of the door.

and as if it was by fate or the universe just really wanted to be entertained right now, guessed who walked out of the bathroom. abby fucking anderson.

her eyes kinda widened and her lips slightly parted, she look like she just seen a ghost, she took a deep breath and you saw her chest moved and back down, like she was in awestruck or something. the staring between to both of you felt like it would last an eternity, in reality it probably only lasted five seconds until she scoffed and walked away making sure to bump your shoulder.

“abby abby! please wait,” you yelled chasing after her, she was walking fast so you started speed walking to catch up, when you did you grab her wrist in attempt for her to stop.

“get the fuck off of me!” she fumed and spun around and stopped walking. “what the fuck do you not understand? i don’t wanna see you, leave me alone!”

“abby please, one more time! just this once and i’ll leave you alone forever please,” you sniffled. you didn’t want to cry but shit. the anger in her face kinda soften. and you two stood there for what felt like an eternity again.

“cmon,” she finally said while she grabbed your hand and led you into a empty bedroom. she let go of your hand and closed the door behind her, and sat on a unmade bed.

“this better be worth my fucking time, go!”

“it is! i swear, i- i just don’t exactly what to say, i mean i’ve been waiting to speak to you for months and i missed you so much abby, there’s not a day that went by that i didn’t think of you and-,” you rambled out but was eventually cut off by abby.

“okay so what exactly do you want to talk about, i know what happen , i know you lied, and i know you regret it and all that bullshit but we’re not getting back together, my girlfriend is downstairs waiting for me and i’m going to keep her because she doesn’t cheat and lie.”

“i know but , i just wanna put this past us and i know we can’t be together but i don’t wanna be friends either, i can’t stand to see you with someone else, i feel like- i don’t know like we were meant to be, it’s corny i know. and i know she’s probably a good person, probably the best you ever had, but i’ve been miserable, i don’t want to be without you,” you expressed, you walked closer to the unmade bed where abby was sitting and gently caressed her shoulder, she looked nervous but at the same time it was how she always used to look at you when you two were a couple.

“what are you doing,” she said uncertain, low, and shy. she was looking down at her leg which was bobbing up and down.

“i don’t wanna think about it,” you breathed, and pulled abby into a kiss. it didn’t last long but it was loving and for three seconds you swore she kissed you back until she pulled away.

“i can’t- this is wrong i have-.”

“don’t think about it ,i know you want it too, just one last time.”

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swtnrcmnt · 1 year

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୨୧ — s.r x singer!r; headcanons (2)

some more to feed into your daydreams ! thank u to honeybeespam for making the funniest reblog 😭🤍 enjoy !

- i left the other one off with hearing a sad song, but if you release something like “pov” by ariana grande (which lyrically is so beautiful it makes me wanna cry bc why can’t i have that) like because it gets so popular it’s playing everywhere and the team is having a field day teasing spence :((

- it’s basically canon that he mainly listens to classical music, imagine reader puts strings in her music and he’s just like I LOVE THIS

- mathematically breaks down the chords, beats, and tempo of the song lol

- singer!reader is rich as hell which = big house. he comes over and just sees this massive space that could be transformed into a library and is like “i’m moving in.”

- showing him red carpet outfits asking for his opinion but you still can’t choose because he thinks every single one is stunning >:(

- kittens everywhere because he finally has enough space to adopt some and somebody to watch them while he’s on a case (he’s a cat person, idc what anyone says)

- also as i said in the previous hc’s, she most likely moves in with him in dc, simply because it’s possible for her to work in somewhere that’s not la and would prefer to be home when spencer’s home

- elaborating on the freaky sound bites 🤭: picture those tiktok edits with reid’s breathing and whimpering in the background but she uses it in the instrumental of a song and only he knows about it ehehehehe

- if singer!reader does some acting on the side, best believe he watches every single movie she’s in the second it hits theatres ! supportive bf things

- lmfao her showing him edits or tiktoks her fans made of him and again, he’s flattered but extremely confused and concerned by their comments and captions. bless his heart :’)

- she probably has a lot of celebrity friends and penelope screams at spencer like “:o why didn’t you tell me that you were meeting a whole group of a-listers???”

- hates hearing people talk crap about you. he knows you’re numb to it because it’s the part that literally comes with fame: hate. but he can’t help it because he knows you personally and it hurts his feeling to hear people dislike you :(

- mr technophobe who buys all your album vinyls and gets them for free from you

- sending the team pr packages of merch and new stuff you launch !! and spencer wearing the hoodies you send him 24/7 and taking sm pride in it !

- filming tiktoks with him. even if he’s not exactly in the frame it could just be him adding a little cute comment to whatever you’re wearing :)

- is super super careful about telling people personal stuff about you especially because you’re globally known and have paparazzi on u left and right

- anytime there’s a particularly sadder song on an album he’s like “is this about me :(“ because he’s so so scared of fucking up and losing you

- the fear is also like 10x worse because he knows that if you two break up, it’ll be publicly displayed and he will literally see your face everywhere and hear your name all the time if you get with somebody new

- no no no cause, prison reid… and he has to take you off the visiting list because the guys around him keep making weird comments about you :’(

- a lot of really good angsty songs came out of those three months though hehe 🤭

here’s part one ! part three

that’s all i can think about right now ! hope u like :)

again, this reblog is everything to me 🫂🫧

#swtnrcmnt ۵ #criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer reid x singer!reader #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid headcanon #i love him so much

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koiir · 1 year

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I’ve got something to confess…

— Them as compass lyrics

Characters - albedo, venti , Kaeya, kazuha, xiao, Scaramouche /kunikuzushi

Genre - fluff, angst with comfort

— Albedo

“I think I need you with me for all-time, when I need new directions for my mind.”

With Albedo, having you by his side is already something he can use as inspiration. Yet what he loves most about you is the way you think, what different ways you can come up with when he ask for your advice or help. The way you think, the way you always help him no matter what, even when you aren’t feeling the best tells him you’re everything he needs.

But with him not being human, you have also helped him with that. Comforting him when he revealed that to you, and telling him you would love him no matter what. The way you help him understand his emotions, makes him feel secure. Secure in himself, because he never thought that he would be able to feel these types of emotions, yet you were the one who showed him. Showed him these emotions that consume his heart. Because of you.

— Venti

“You’ll tell me if I’m acting like a fool, I know that you’re not something to lose.”

Having someone who can deal with venti… is rare to say the least. But that’s because it’s you! You’ve always been so willing to help him out even when he can be a pain in the ass while drunk. The way you comfort him, the way you put him in bed and giving him a drink of water to calm him down is the bare minimum… yet to venti, it’s everything he could ask for. He knows you’re just doing what’s right, trying to get him over his hangover, yet he knows without you he wouldn’t be able to control himself.

Without you, he would have a harder time taking care of himself. Knowing what’s the best for him, how to take care of himself. Yes, he could learn, but it’s not the same. Not the same way you take care of him. That’s why he can’t lose you, anyone knew that you were a special person. So losing you would be hell for venti. He sometimes wonders why you chose him, someone who is drunk mess most of the time. But even with that, you would comfort him for being a fool. Being a fool in not realizing how much you loved him that you wouldn’t be with anyone else other than him.

— Kaeya

“You’re always with me when I’m down, I’m lucky you’ve been keeping me around.”

You knew what getting into a relationship with the Calvary caption would mean, some secrets not being told. But Kaeya was somebody you loved, and you knew that eventually he would tell you those secrets from his past. Kaeya himself knew it, he knew he could trust you. But he wasn’t ready to reveal those secrets. He felt like a dick, he said he trusted you yet wouldn’t even tell you his past?

Yet you would still comfort him, because you knew what these secrets held. You knew what they meant to Kaeya. They meant that he could fear what you thought about him, and you couldn’t lie to yourself. You did wonder, what are exactly are those secrets? But loving him also meant staying by his side, which was what he needed. Someone to love him… someone who would understand him. Kaeya would sometimes even think that you would leave him for these untold secrets, but he shouldn’t have every underestimated you and your love. He’s lucky, so lucky. That no matter what, you will always stick by his side.

— Kazuha

“You’re the star I look for every night.”

Missing you is the worst feeling Kazuha has to feel, and he hates the fact that it’s often due to his travels. But one thing that makes it all better is the nights before he falls asleep, looking up at the starry night, thinking of you. He remembers you laying down, cuddled next to him looking up at the stars while he talks about his day. Remembering the way you stare at awe at the night sky, you always said how the stars in the night always caught your eye. Which is why he made it a routine every night.

It’s the reason why he feels more at ease without you, the starry night reminding him of you. He wonders if you are doing the same, thinking of him while gazing at the night. And he knows the answer, you are.

“No matter what, you will always be in my mind Kazu. Take the stars for example, so far apart yet each one of them is still contacted. Just like us.” So far apart, yet two hearts are connected no matter what.

— Xiao

“When It’s dark, you’ll stick right by my side.”

He doesn’t deserve you. He thinks. Yet he’s so grateful that you have stuck by his side, even during the beginning… when he made it extremely clear that you shouldn’t be around someone like him. Clearly due to his karmic debts he would say, but no matter what, you wouldn’t budge. Just like now.

“You shouldn’t be out this late. Shouldn’t you be getting some sleep?” You stood next to him, staring straight ahead into the night sky. “I’m not that tired that I can’t spend time with you xiao.”

The way you two stayed there together until dawn, with xiao holding you close to him. He knew that you should have gotten some rest instead of coming out with him, because you still ended up falling into a deep slumber. But with him. He smiled softly when realizing what he felt, your body leaning on his. He didn’t want to move you… but he knew when you awoke your neck would be feeling some aches from the uncomfortable position it was in. So he moved your head onto his chest, which you always said was more comfortable than your own bed. He didn’t believe that… but what he did believe was that you will stick by his side. No matter what.

— Scaramouche

“Like a magnet, can’t help that I’m attracted to you, I am. Could you keep on guiding me? Please.”

He has always been attracted to you, even before he became the wanderer. But with you back In his life, he couldn’t let you go no matter what. He had already lost so much, you couldn’t leave him too. But with you by his side every day and night, he knew you wouldn’t. You were the only person who could understand him in and out. You knew what to do, how to comfort him. Because he was still scared, scared of losing you.

He knows there’s someone better, someone better for you. He believes that he isn’t enough for you. But… when you comfort him, holding him tight in your embrace, he has to believe you. You remind him over and over that he’s the one for you. This comfort from you, is what keeps him going. He can understand a bit, how it feels to be a mortal. Yet, with these emotions, he can’t handle it on his own. It feels as if it’s too much for him to handle. But with you, it’s easier. You guide him into the right direction, which is why he can’t lose you. He never thought he could feel like this, love someone so much. So, for you he will do his best. His best in so he can be the partner you deserve, but he also needs your guiding in order to move forward.

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uramilf · 10 months

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hi! I love your writing sm. can I req this it's based on a tiktok I saw and thought it'd be cute. so basically y/n singing taylor's new song you're losing me esp the bridge! and matty is concerned like "we're okay right? you've been singing that song with much passion" or something like that! I just really thought it would be cute thank u so much

Ok I decided to turn this one into a proper imagine where the reader is a popular solo artist who misses her rockstar boyfriend and literally sat up until 3am working on it because i loved the idea so fucking much, thank you anon <3

Warnings: Angst and sadness but happy ending I promise

You're Losing Me

Y/n Y/l/n was sitting alone in her dressing room cross legged on a battered sofa. She had just received a message from her friend George to inform her that The 1975 had performed their last show of their tour and were flying back to London the very next morning. He also dropped in that Matty was excited to see her again and couldn't wait to get home. She hadn't bothered to respond. Why couldn't Matty have told her that himself? Her heart sank on remembering that although Matty was finishing his tour, she was just beginning hers. She would spend one night with him in their shared house before flying to the USA and wouldn't return for several weeks. Y/n felt empty, as she had since Matty left. She looked up to realise that she wasn't alone at all; in fact the dressing room was full of people refilling her water bottles, fixing the order of her costumes for quick changes, ensuring the setlist was right. But still, the crushing loneliness got to her. She doubted that it would be remedied in twenty minutes when the crowd of 15,000 people were screaming her name. She was right.

--------------------

Exactly 24 hours later, Y/n lay in her boyfriend's arms, thrilled to have him home but heart not feeling any lighter. She could feel them pulling apart from each other, the demanding schedules their careers presented them with tearing apart the best relationship either of them had ever been in. Even as Matty stroked her hair and pressed soft kisses to her forehead, she was fighting to keep a smile on her face. She wanted to burst into tears and tell him she needed him. She needed to be with him all the time, not just sometimes. She needed to fall into his arms the second she came offstage. She needed to feel as though their relationship wasn't a liability. When Y/n left Matty in bed to use the bathroom, he started to scroll Twitter and look for videos of his girl's first show of her tour. He came across one that already had thousands upon thousands of views. It was captioned "Y/n Y/l/n cover Taylor Swift's "You're Losing Me" at her London show last night". He clicked and started watching. His girlfriend sounded angelic as usual, but he didn't feel like he was watching a video of her usual happy, performance-loving self. The girl on his screen was breaking from the inside out. The passion she was singing with was gave her the image of someone who undeniably related to what she was singing. She wasn't just covering a popular song. He could tell she meant it. He listened closely to the lyrics; "And I wouldn't marry me either, a pathological people pleaser", "Do something babe, say something." Matty's heart was in his throat as he realised that there was a reason she had chosen the song. Did she think he didn't love her anymore? Had she been hoping for the next step in their relationship? Was he really losing her?

Y/n re-entered the room to see Matty, phone in hand, with a tear slipping down his cheek. "What's wrong, baby? Aren't you happy to be home?" "Are we ok, Y/n?" Matty whispered. "What? Of course we are. What's brought this on, love?" "The song. Last night. I know you didn't write it but you just sang it with so much passion, I couldn't help but feel like there's something you're not telling me." Y/n looked at his phone and was overcome with guilt. He understood that she had been singing to him. She took Matty's face in her hands and swiped away a tear gently with her thumb. "I'm sorry, Matty. But I just felt like I related to the song so much. I couldn't help but feel like we drifted apart while you were on tour. We were barely speaking by the last few weeks of it. I just needed you here, and honestly I did feel like you were losing me." Matty's sobs didn't stop. "Are you saying you want to break up with me because I'm away too much?" "No! Of course not baby, I couldn't imagine breaking up with you for the world. You are all I want in life. I promise. But I just don't know how to do this long distance thing anymore. I need us to be together." "Y/n, darling, I know. I'm dreading tomorrow. In all honestly, I understand why you sang the song. I was drifting away from you. I just couldn't bear to talk to you over the phone. I couldn't even answer a text from you without crying about how much I missed you."

Y/n was crying now too, feeling terrible that she hadn't seen how miserable Matty had been on tour. She stroked his hair as he buried his head in her chest. "It's ok baby, we're gonna be ok." Matty lifted his head to kiss away her tears. "Listen, darling. I'm going to speak to the boys and let them know that I'm not gonna be in the studio for a while. Give me a few days to recover from tour and then I'm gonna fly out and meet you. We'll only be away from each other for another week tops." Y/n tackled him into a hug. "You're really coming on tour with me?" "Yes, darling, really. I'm sorry I even considered going back to the studio instead of coming with you. I've just felt so pressured into releasing new music recently. But everyone else can just wait for me and my girl."

Y/n and Matty lay in each other's embrace once more, and as she was drifting off to sleep, she heard him whisper, "I promise I'll never let you feel like you're losing me again."

-----------------

A/N: Soz guys that got way deeper than I wanted it to. Got carried away ig but oh well

#the 1975 #matty healy #matty #matty healy x reader #matty healy imagine #matty healy angst #adam hann #george daniel #ross macdonald

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shady-lemur · 11 months

Text

Stargirl ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Thank you guys for the support on the last part!! Hopefully I can figure out a schedule of posting soon lmao, happy pride month!!

Ellie x reader

Part 1, Part 2!!, part 3

Also tell me why it took literally over 10 minutes for me to figure out the link thing omfg why am I old

After the encounter with your ex, Ellie, you try your best to avoid anything to do with her. But with your luck...

You hum along to the song playing through your speaker as you scroll instagram. You've basically put yourself in house arrest other than going to work ever since seeing Ellie. You couldn't trust yourself not to get into a situation where you needed saving again.

Your breath hitches when you see Dina's post. It's her and Ellie sitting on Ellie's couch with cards against humanity spread out on her coffee table. JJ, Dina's son, is sleeping in Ellie's arm. You study the way Ellie's eyes squint as she smiles at the camera. The caption says, "mommy material"

"Fucking mommy material? She isn't even girlfriend material." (I love salty y/n) you grumble and like the picture before turning your phone off. Maybe it's time to finally go out again.. You didn't have work tomorrow..

About a half an hour later, your looking at your ass in the mirror. Making sure that your black dress covers enough but not too much, maybe you'll even meet someone tonight. You've decided on going to a new bar tonight, their website says they have musicians that come in on Fridays so it'll be a chill place to relax.

You pick up your bag and lace your new converse before leaving your apartment.

Your sitting on one of the leather couches that face the stage drinking a (drink of choice) when you hear a familiar voice saying hi to the bartender. You turn you head around and see the one and only Dina!! She must of felt your eyes on her because she turn her head and her eyes immediately lit up. "Y/n!!! Baby!"

You smile as she runs over and sits next to you, giving you a side hug. "I haven't seen you in fucking forever! How are you?"

After you and Ellie broke up, you stopped hanging out with a lot of your friends too. It was too awkward for you. But they never stopped caring about you, it was hard for you to come to terms with that.

"I'm okay! I've just been working a lot recently.. I haven't had a chance to check this place out yet." Dina nods and rests her head on your shoulder. "It's really nice here. I come here every Friday to see-" she stops mid sentence and slowly turns her head up to look at you with wide eyes. You hear someone else on the stage setting up but you keep your eyes on Dina's thinking face.

You tilt your head as she puts her hand over her mouth, "wait.. do you know that-"

She's cut off by another familiar sound. The song Ellie wrote for you on your one year anniversary, you guys stayed up all night writing lyrics for it. You whip your head back to the stage and your face drops, "oh my fucking god."

Dina starts to laugh uncomfortably st the situation, "um- we can leave and I can take you to another really good place, they have burgers! Ellie will understand if I leave-"

You can barely hear what Dina's saying. It's just you and Ellie now. The song you've heard so many times and Ellie's soft voice coming through the speakers, you might even be singing the song quietly too. She opens her eyes and immediately meets yours. You hear her voice falter but she keeps eye contact as she sings.

Ellie goes back stage after a few more songs and you are finally snapped back into reality. In reality, you're sobbing. Dina's rubbing your back comfortingly and is holding your head as you lean it against her shoulder.

You look up at her and take a deep breath, "I should get out of here- I'm sorry Dina. It was nice seeing you." She let's you go but holds your wrist so you turn back to her. She sighs, "let's not be strangers anymore, mkay? I want you to meet JJ." You smile sadly at her and nod, "yeah, um.. text me?"

She smiles and let's you go as you try to RACE OUTTA THERE!! YOU GOTTA GO BEFORE ELLIE COMES OUT!!

You're out the door and halfway to your car before you hear your name being called. Fuck. "Y/n! Can we talk please, I hate the way I reacted-"

You turn around, giving Ellie a view of your tear stained face. "What the fuck are you doing singing that fucking song?" Ellie furrows her brows, "what the fuck do you mean?"

"That's our song Ellie. Why are you still playing it?" You see Ellie scoff a little before taking a deep breath. "Can we talk? I can explain things better than we aren't standing in the middle of the fucking sidewalk." She kicks a rock.

You have to think very hard about this. It'll be embarrassing if you start to fight in a restaurant or park, going to each other's apartments is too intimate, but you'd be lying if you said you didn't miss talking to Ellie (even if she doesn't know that ha..ha.ha..).

"Okay."

"Okay?!"

You sigh, "We'll meet at the river. tomorrow at 6?"

She smiles and almost chuckles a little bit, "yeah that's great.."

What the hell did you get yourself into?

You and Ellie had a special spot near the river since your first date. It was a rundown, abandoned shed type thing that you made your own. Ellie added a loveseat and a coffee table, you added battery powered fairy lights and some tapestries.

Ellie's already sitting on the loveseat when you get there. Her hair is pull up into that half up half down style that she always does, you can see her white tank top under her brown flannel, her sleeves are rolled up to show off her tattoo, and she's MAN SPREADING. She definitely knew what she was doing.

"Hi." You say, awkwardly sitting as far away from her as you can and putting down the cut up fruit your brought as a peace offering. She smiles and wipes her hands of her pants, "hey.."

You notice the two drinks on the coffee table, she grabs one and hands it to you, "this still your favorite?" You nod and smile slightly at her.

After a few seconds of silence she speaks, "I started therapy about a month ago. I'm going once a week." You look at her and smile, "that's great Ellie. I'm happy for you."

She nods and looks down at her hands, "um, I'm sorry about what I said. It isn't true, I just let my frustration speak for me. And I'm sorry for literally making your life a living hell for the last year we were together. I had a lot of shit I needed to deal with and you didn't deserve that."

The truth is, you'd forgiven her a long time ago. All you wanted for her was happiness and seeing her apologizing is proof that she is getting better.

You take a sip of your drink and meet her eyes, "thank you for apologizing. That means a lot. I'm sorry too, I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions when you literally picked me up off the side of the road and let me sleep in your bed."

"Truce?"

".. Truce."

She smiles at you and leans back on the couch. "Soo, what've you been up too?"

You shrug, "nothing really.. I got hired full-time by the high school. I've been teaching a bunch of 10th graders literature and getting piss drunk."

Ellie's eyes light up, "seriously?? Y/n that's fucking amazing!! Not the getting piss drunk part but you've been waiting so long for an opening." You laugh and nod, "it's fun, the kids really like me."

In all seriousness the excitement on Ellie's face makes you want to grab her and kiss her. Buuut, you know you shouldn't...

"What about you?"

"I got promoted at work, I got a really good raise. Joel wants me to start learning how to run the place so he can retire soon." You grin at her, "ooh, little Ellie's gonna run a whole auto shop by herself" you wiggle your eyebrows and she playfully hits your arm.

"Shut up!!" Her cheeks are tinted red as you laugh. "And what if I don't?"

Ellie pauses and looks at you, you watch as her eyes travel down your lips but quickly make their way back up. "I'll give you discounts on repairs." You're lips are ZIPPED because that shit is expensive.

Ellie snorts and gets a grape from your container. You both just sit in silence for a little bit as you watch her. You're both studying each other's faces, thinking of all the times your lips have connected and your hands have touched her cheeks.

You take another sip of your drink and spill it all over your white long sleeve shirt. "Fuck!"

Ellie grabs the drink and sets it back down, looking around for some way to dry your shirt. "Um, fuck we don't have any napkins here"

You shake your head, "it's fine, it'll just air dry, this shirt was like 5 dollars anyway." Ellie furrows her eyebrows and starts to take off her flannel, "it's too cold, you can change into this." She hands it to you and turns around to give you privacy.

"Are you sure? You're gonna be cold just in a tank top."

Ellie shakes her head, "don't worry about me, I want you to be warm."

About an hour and a half later you're sleeping. Your head in Ellie's lap so comfortably as she traces circles on your arm. She huffs and looks at the time,

8:37 pm

Ellie didn't want to wake you but she also was freezing her ass off as it get colder. She carefully gets up, picks you up bridal style, and carries you to her car. You'd taken an uber here so you didn't have to worry about your car being left here.

She sets you down in the passenger seat and you slowly open your eyes, "what're you doing?"

Ellie smiles and buckles your seat belt, "I'm gonna take you home, I don't want you taking an Uber when your this tired. Can I have your apartment building?"

You blink a few times before smiling and nodding, "thank you els. My building is the one by Nico's bar." She nods and closes your door before getting in her side and starting the car.

Even though she kept herself calm, Ellie was over the moon. You called her els. A nickname she hadn't been called ever since you broke up.

Ellie didn't care if she was your girlfriend or not. All she cared about was getting you back into her life, I think she succeeded?

You turn in your seat and look at her, "can we be friends?"

She glaces at you and smiles, "fuck yeah."

Not for long HaHaHaHa... 😈

Waaaa I hope this is good... I feel like the ending was a little bit rushed!! There will be a part 3, hopefully they kiss! I wnat to see them kiss!!

I'm getting surgery tomorrow so hopefully it doesn't mess up the writing of part 3 too much!

I love you all so much, please ask if you want to be on the taglist for the next part and feel free to give me suggestions and shit. (^з^)-☆Chu!!

Taglist <3

@gold-dustwomxn @catostrophiclesbian @ellieswifee @unstablefemme

ily girlies

#ellie tlou #ellie williams #tlou part 2 #tlou fic #ellie x fem reader #kiss kiss kiss kiss #stargirl series

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use-your-telescope · 5 months

Text

When Everything's Made to be Broken - Chapter 8: You're Just Business

Summary: Loki confronts Theo about her avoidance of the other Avengers.

Author's Notes: Fun story/trivia about this song: In an interview with the Grammy Museum, it was revealed that some of the phrases in this first verse resulted from producer Tony Berg’s mishearing of Jon Foreman’s original lyrics: “You come ‘round like a prison ship” was misheard as “pirate ship”, and “You got a fist for a lower lip” was misheard as “fish.” Ultimately, the band decided to record the song with the mondegreens as the song’s final lyrics. I like to think that Theo was aware of this little tidbit and it led to part of why she chose this particular song.

Side note, would anyone be interested if I shared more of these goofy little trivia bits/non-spoiler reasons that certain songs appear at certain times (and maybe even captions that Theo might have posted with the covers)? I’d share them on tumblr as a little “behind the scenes” sort of thing.

I’m posting this a day early because tomorrow is the last day of helping my parents move, which also means saying farewell to the house I grew up in; I’m sure I’ll be all up in my feelings and distracted, so rather than risk missing my (self-imposed) deadline, I’m doing something wild and posting early.

If you enjoy, please reblog!! I'm a lil' blog and reblogs really help me out <3

Content Warnings: None?

Word Count: 5,314

Read on AO3 | When Everything's Made to be Broken Masterlist

Song: I need you (to be wrong) - Switchfoot

You come 'round like a pirate ship You're just business You got a fish for a lower lip You're just business You're the parentless, nightmare kid You're just business You don't answer for any of this You're just business

The end of onboarding meant the return of lazy days off.

Other than the sound of a sleety-drizzle outside, it was probably quiet enough in the tower to hear a pin drop. Any reprieve from commotion could best be described as blissful, and not needing to peer around every corner so Theo didn’t run into the Avengers brought a different kind of relief.

In a normal day, Natasha and Steve were always the first to emerge, since they liked early morning training sessions. With how they timed their workouts, Theo typically had to wake up at the ass-crack of dawn just to have 30 minutes to get into the kitchen, make herself a cup of coffee, and then slink back to her corner of the tower or get the hell out, which meant going down to the hospital to get ready for work.

Then again, when Theo got back to her suite at night and heard the commotion and the raucous laughter echoing from down the hall, something painful twisted in Theo’s chest, making her miss her life before the Avengers. It didn’t help that ever since she visited Mémère, Theo caught herself weighing whether it was worth trying to make friends with anyone while she was here.

She hadn’t planned on staying with the group after her favor was done, so on the one hand she didn’t want to grow attached, then ditch them. On the other hand, now that she couldn’t see her other friends, life had become little more than work, which was a lonely way to live. And though she loathed to admit it, Loki’s visits and Julie’s perspective on the Avengers made Theo wonder if her trepidation was truly warranted.

Then again, the Avengers didn’t know the full extent of her history or her powers. Given the reactions from people who knew her sob story, she didn’t anticipate they’d like her very much if they learned the truth. That meant every social interaction felt like it required Theo to put on a show; every word, every action was a calculated risk. She’d been doing it for so long that it felt like second nature, but it didn’t mean she liked it.

However, none of her concerns around socializing mattered, at least for the time being. According to the side discussions before the most recent debrief, all of the Avengers had plans for the weekend which took them away from New York, so she had the entire tower to herself. Wanda and Vision snuck out on a weekend getaway to Maine, Tony and Bruce were presenting at some science conference in Switzerland (and Peter tagged along), the super soldiers agreed to help with an event for the US military down in DC, Natasha and Yelena decided to visit Clint and his family out at their farm, Shuri happened to be in Oakland, and Thor had gone to New Asgard for something. Theo assumed that Loki had gone with him, since he was also an Asgardian prince and all.

Regardless, Theo’s agenda for the day consisted of one thing: reading. A mountain of SHIELD reports loomed on Theo’s desk ever since she started, consisting of both recent and past missions that would hopefully provide the context she needed to offer her expertise on the shadow creatures. Even if she would have rather been marathoning Queer Eye or visiting Mémère, a rainy Saturday morning without anyone around seemed like just as good of a time as any to check the reports of her never-ending list of things to do.

But even before she dug into the stack of reports, she needed coffee.

Theo padded through the halls of the tower, relishing the echo of her footsteps and the lack of chatter filling the air. Upon entering the kitchen, Theo decided that rather than work her way through the reports in her suite, she’d indulge in a change of scenery and set up shop at the kitchen island.

After starting the coffee, Theo brought out her laptop and the pile of reports, scattering them across the breakfast bar for easy review. She placed her headphones over her ears, cranked up her music, and became so absorbed in reading about the fallout of Ultron and the Sokovia Accords that she forgot about the coffee brewing…

… She also failed to observe that she wasn’t the only one home.

A coffee mug appeared next to her out of seemingly thin air, to which Theo yelped and practically flew out of her seat.

“What the – “ she tore her headphones off and whirled around to find Loki standing there, holding his own cup of coffee. “Jesus, Loki, creep around much?”

“I was in no way creeping. Your decision to wear headphones impeded your ability to hear me.” Loki’s tone remained cool and unaffected as he took a sip of his own coffee, leaning back against the counter. “Perhaps you might demonstrate some gratitude toward me; after all, I prepared your coffee for you.”

“In my defense, I also didn’t realize I wasn’t the only one home – I thought you went back to New Asgard with Thor.” Theo protested, trying to ignore the searing heat that rose on her cheeks. She palmed the mug of coffee in one hand, glancing briefly at the swirls of steam rising from the ceramic cup.

“I’ve no reason to be in New Asgard at present.” He shrugged, before narrowing his eyes at Theo. “If you believed you were alone, why not use Stark’s audio system to listen to your music? It is not as if you would cause a disruption.”

“It’s a habit,” Theo shrugged casually, allowing her focus to travel to her new teammate. Unlike Theo, whose heart still pounded in her chest from the surprise, Loki's casual posture and amused expression left him looking cool as a cucumber, because of course he would. “Besides, high quality headphones have better sound quality than any stereo system Tony Stark could build – it’s easier to hear the nuance and little details in the recordings.”

Loki cocked a skeptical brow at her before sauntering over to the refrigerator. As he bent down to rummage through the contents, Theo took advantage of the opportunity to drink in the full sight of Loki in the mornings.

Loki’s Saturday morning attire was more relaxed than she had ever seen from him. Black joggers slung low on his hips and followed the line of his slim form, while a gray t-shirt clung to his torso and hinted at the toned muscle beneath. He pulled his black curls back into a loose bun, but left one strand hanging down to frame his face, highlighting a jawline that cut like glass.

For all the jokes Julie made, she wasn’t kidding about Loki’s attractiveness. But that was like saying the sky was blue - no one would question that a god was objectively attractive.

In comparison, he probably thought Theo looked a bit sloppy in her oversized sweatshirt and yoga pants, her own hair tossed up in what looked less like a bun and more like a rat’s nest…

Channeling her inner gremlin, as Max would say.

Loki turned around and caught Theo studying him.

“Are you enjoying the view?” He smirked.

“I’ve never seen you in anything remotely casual before,” Theo said, mirroring his expression. “Looks good on you.”

Loki hummed, something devilish twitching on his lips to match the glint in his eye. “I should hope so.”

Theo rolled her eyes. Of the many traits Loki held, humility did not seem to be high on the list. Then again, Theo knew that if she was that attractive, she wouldn’t be humble about it, so it wasn’t like she could hold that against him.

Instead of feeding Loki’s ego, Theo returned her attention to the Sokovia report. She knew herself well enough to know if she didn’t make substantial progress on the reports that day, she would never catch up.

However, Loki either did not get the hint that Theo wanted to be left to work or he chose to ignore it, positioning himself across the island from Theo. With each passing moment, Theo felt his burning stare intensify.

“Keep looking at me like that and I’ll hit you over the head with a chair.” Theo threatened, not even glancing up from her work.

“Darling, such a temper from you this morning.” Loki practically purred. “I would have expected gratitude - after all, I prepared your morning coffee for you.”

Theo rolled her eyes, but couldn’t help the hint of a smile that quirked up. Of course the prince would make a big deal out of a small gesture. “Well, thank you for the coffee, your highness, now will you leave me alone to work?”

“How are you settling in?”

Ugh.

He couldn’t have been that dense, right? He must have known Theo did not want to talk to him at that moment. No one became a renowned diplomat if they couldn’t understand basic social cues.

“Fine,” Theo drawled, “Better if you leave me to read in peace.”

“You never choose to spend time in the common areas like this. Why today?”

A loaded question, delivered with a deceptively light tone, had Theo’s hair standing on the back of her neck.

No, he wasn’t clueless or dense - Loki wanted something; information, probably.

Something unsettling lurched in Theo’s stomach.

“Because I thought I was going to be alone?” Irritation colored Theo’s response; she gritted her teeth, debating if she should try to divert the conversation or just piss him off so he’d leave her alone.

Her morals leaned towards the former, but her temper leaned towards the latter.

For the moment, she held her tongue.

“Perhaps this will surprise you, but you are allowed to venture into the common areas while others are around to spend your leisure time and… Do whatever it is that you are doing,” Loki casually gestured to the stack of papers scattered between them. “As you previously stated, you are not a princess to be locked away in a tower.”

“Currently, I’m reading reports,” Theo muttered, “And you’re proving to me exactly why I don’t do this in common areas – because you’re distracting me.”

It took a significant amount of willpower not to slam her computer closed and retreat to her suite; after all, the heavily redacted report about Budapest that was next on her list looked like an enticing read.

“See, that brings me to my next question: why, when you have a beautiful Saturday morning to relax, are you spending your time reading reports and paperwork?” A playful, lighthearted tone graced Loki’s question, but Theo’s patience wore dangerously thin. “If you wish for quality reading material, you only need to ask. I’ve plenty of recommendations.”

“Okay, since apparently you refuse to get the hint, I’m just going to be blunt: I am trying to work. I don’t want to talk right now. Quite frankly, your impromptu interrogation is pissing me off. So for the love of all that is holy, can you leave me alone?” Theo huffed, outright glowering at Loki.

“You may not be interested in speaking, but I’m certainly interested in answers to my question.” Loki arched a brow at Theo, sipping his coffee as if he could wait all day for a response.

“Because the world isn’t going to save itself and I have a lot of background knowledge to catch up on if I don’t want to fuck up one of these missions and get a bunch of people killed.” Theo’s frustration made its open debut, but amidst her ire she failed to hide the undercurrent of anxiety in her answer.

Before Theo even finished, Loki’s demeanor shifted from taunting to serious - he must have recognized that he struck a nerve.

Shit.

She let her guard down and he latched onto it instantly… Careless mistakes like that could get her killed.

“Are you aware that it is not a requirement to memorize every piece of SHIELD’s history?” Loki leaned in so he could look at Theo over her laptop, face shifting to something unreadable before he continued. “Generally speaking, we have only enough knowledge to complete the individual mission. You need not push yourself to learn everything so that you might recall it at a moment’s notice.”

It wasn’t about knowing everything - it was about assessing the risks. Theo needed to know the history in order to understand the potential risks. If she was in an emergency department, she knew the environment. She knew the variables. She had control over her situation.

But in the field? Knowing anything was a laughable thought.

“It’s not about memorizing, it’s about learning what I got myself into,” Theo flatly replied, hoping to make up for her slip. “I know Fury is fond of leaving out important details in favor of creating a narrative, so I want to make sure I know what he hasn’t told me before I’m sent out into the line of fire.”

“And you believe reports are the way to learn such information?” Skepticism dripped from Loki’s question.

“I didn’t say I liked it, but this,” Theo gestured to the mess of documents around her, refusing to let her nerves show once more, “is better than letting Fury trot me around like a prize horse or his little puppet.”

It was a half-truth; he didn’t need to know all the details, but perhaps she could spin it to take some of the pressure off.

“I do not believe you’re giving yourself enough credit.” Loki stepped around the island so he stood next to Theo, then shut her laptop so she would look him in the eye. He certainly accomplished the goal, but earned a frustrated groan from Theo in the process. “You’re an immensely sharp and powerful sorcerer – I can feel the magic pouring off you. You easily handle extreme physical duress during training, you effortlessly adapt to any social situation, and it has not escaped my attention that you’re extremely well-studied in a variety of areas.”

Sure, Loki saw Theo spar with Steve, and obviously they’d hung out a few times; they spoke at the party from the first night, and showed up to the soccer game and the bar show… But a handful of interactions wouldn’t have been enough to draw those conclusions, right?

Maybe it was a bluff, or an attempt at wooing her with his famed silver tongue so she would give him the information he wanted.

It wouldn’t be the first time someone lied to her in hopes of gaining her trust.

“First of all, I’m not sure whether I should be flattered or creeped out that you’ve been watching me so closely,” Theo retorted with a scowl. “Second of all, what’s your point?”

“If you are concerned about your ability to defend yourself on a mission, you need not fret.” Loki sounded cocky, almost arrogant – how would he know what they were up against? “You realize you are not the only one responsible for your safety in the field?”

“You really think that the others, who look at me like I’m a terror, give a shit about my safety?” “They do not believe you are a terror.”

“Cool, tell that to my grandma when she has to deal with my dead body,” Theo muttered. She attempted to snatch her laptop from Loki, but he held firm.

Loki may have been nicknamed a silvertongue, but the only thing his tongue had done was piss Theo off.

Enough was enough.

“ I don’t have time for this shit.” With a flick of her wrist, a swirl of shimmering runes encompassed the reports and her laptop, teleporting them back to her quarters. Theo snatched her coffee mug, then offered a final wave and a bratty sneer before transporting herself to her suite.

In the solitude of her suite, Theo let out a sigh.

So much for a peaceful Saturday morning.

I got a body, but I lost my mind I'm just business Placeholder with a bottom line I'm just business Please don't take this personally It's just business

Standing in the kitchen, Loki gaped at the empty seat before him and replayed the events which led to his current predicament.

In some ways, he could have foreseen such an outcome. Initial interactions with Theo had been far more successful than Loki anticipated, to the degree that he almost believed Theo might actually wish to befriend him. Thus, it was inevitable that he would ruin his progress in a truly spectacular manner.

In his defense, walking into the kitchen and finding Theo there had not been something he anticipated. The circumstances practically begged for Loki to engage; when else would he see Theo anywhere besides her workplace or mandatory Avengers engagements?

Yet, after a handful of occasions spent casually making each other’s acquaintance, Loki expected something with a bit more banter, or at least something more lighthearted. Instead, she met his questions with barbed remarks and vicious glares, culminating in another disappearing act.

The Theo that Loki encountered in the kitchen was vastly different from the Theo he first met, or the one that he spent time with in the research library; that Theo seemed confident and self-assured, sharp-witted and formidable regardless of the circumstances. But when caught off-guard, she became aggressive and downright irascible, to the extent that Loki questioned whether or not it was the same woman who he’d spoken to before.

However, deep within Loki’s chest, something uncomfortable twisted. He recognized the behavior, mostly because he had once acted in such a manner; if he was entirely honest with himself, he knew exactly what motivated such behavior:

Protecting oneself at all costs.

Seeing Theo in such a state brought to mind his mother’s gardens in Asgard. When flowers were cut and taken from the gardens, they eventually wilted and withered, unable to adapt to their new surroundings. Roses, one of his mother’s favorite flowers, eventually developed thorns all along the stem, which made cutting the blooms a much more challenging task; a defense mechanism that evolved over the course of millennia.

Like the thorns that protected the roses, Theo’s hostility served as a defense mechanism, an instinct developed to protect herself from something which previously scarred her, something which might have caused her to wither and wilt until nothing more than a shadow of her former self.

In Theo’s behavior, Loki saw himself. There was once a time where he had been so guarded that the other Avengers called him a cactus because of his prickly, sullen demeanor. Though the moniker had become a relic, the instinct remained firmly ingrained upon Loki’s psyche.

Theo was by no means a cactus, but she certainly had some thorns.

Loki sighed, smoothing calloused fingers over his hair. Ideally, he could remedy the situation with minimal lingering damage to the delicate kinship he struck with Theo; yet the manner in which he could achieve such a feat eluded him.

If he approached too soon, she would only recoil, particularly if she felt cornered. If he waited too long to speak to her, she might suspect his intentions stemmed from less than savory desires - exploitation or a means to an end.

After much dithering, Loki settled upon a plan: if he did not see Theo around lunch, he would knock on her door. If she failed to respond, he would try again at dinner time.

If he still had not heard anything, he would send her a message through his mobile, leaving the onus upon Theo - if she wished to interact she could, however he would not push further.

Any and all confidence Loki held in the plan dwindled when noon came and went with no sign of the silver shadow. Despite the aura of magic radiating from within, Loki’s knocks were met with silence, only dampening his spirits further.

To be on the receiving end of rejection brought a certain discomfort which Loki had not outright encountered in quite some time, and it remained at least as unpleasant as he remembered (if not moreso). Midgardians never outright rejected him - first, they feared him, but over time some came to lust after him. As for the Asgardians, they knew better than to disrespect a crown prince, even if his lineage brought disgrace upon the throne. The more he dwelled on the matter, the clearer it became that he could not remember the last time someone outright turned away from him in such a blatant manner.

Without any sign of Theo in the afternoon, or around the time when the others typically took their evening meal, Loki braced himself for the worst and made the trek down the corridor.

As he approached, the faint sound of music could be heard from inside Theo’s quarters, which combined with her aura confirmed she was present. After pausing for a moment to gather himself, Loki rapped his knuckles upon the door.

Much to his surprise, the music stopped. Footsteps grew louder as Theo approached the door. The noise ceased for a beat, then the lock clicked, and the door swung wide.

Theo stood before him, arms crossed and brows drawn tight as she scrutinized Loki.

“I don’t know if I should be impressed or annoyed by your stubbornness.” Theo skipped any formal greeting, leaning against the doorframe as she gave him a once-over. “Then again, I’m the one that answered the door, so maybe your strategy is effective, or I’m a glutton for punishment. Either way, are you here to continue badgering me about work, or is there something else you want?”

Loki drew in a deep breath.

“It seems I struck a nerve,” he observed. “For that, I apologize.”

“Is that all?” Theo eyed Loki warily, as if she knew other matters remained on his conscience.

Loki sighed; it seemed as good of a time as any to address what Midgardians often referred to as ‘the elephant in the room.’

“I noticed you’ve not yet made the acquaintance of the others.”

“I socialize with the other hospital staff,” Theo countered.

Loki scoffed. “I am referring to the other Avengers.”

“I know.” Theo answered as if she had no intention of continuing the conversation. Loki raised his eyebrows at her in a silent question; she rolled her eyes and sighed. “Look, I’m sure they’re fine, but I’m not really interested.”

“Dare I inquire as to why?”

“For one thing, the only reason they’re pretending to be interested in me is because Fury gave them the mission of convincing me to stay on as an Avenger.” Theo cocked an eyebrow at Loki as she slouched further into the doorframe. “So it’s not like they’re really trying to be my friend. And besides, most of them were more than quick to jump to conclusions about who, or what kind of person, I was.”

“If that is so, then why have you not shunned my company?” Loki challenged. “How do you know I am not making your acquaintance to win over the director?”

“I don’t,” she admitted, “but you don’t seem like the type of person to crave Nick Fury’s adoration, or like you’d let him make you his bitch. I suppose I could be wrong, though.”

“Such rousing praise,” Loki drawled. “Truly, the utmost of faith you place upon me—“

“Okay, fine - you really want to know why I’m willing to talk to you?” Theo interrupted, silencing Loki in the process, “Because in that first meeting, you didn’t automatically assume I was the villain.”

Something painful twisted in Loki’s stomach. Nowhere in the list of potential responses that Loki developed prior to asking the question was Theo’s answer, yet what she described was an experience he knew all too well. The memory of Barton’s initial reaction to Loki’s presence remained painfully vivid to the Asgardian, which only diminished Loki’s confidence in his argument.

Still, Theo’s perceptions of the situation were not entirely true. “I was not the only Avenger who made no assumptions about your morality—”

“Not out loud,” Theo agreed, “But you were the only one who didn’t look at me like I was some kind of terror. You actually looked at me as a person.”

If anyone could empathize with Theo’s experience, it would be Loki. Joining the Avengers, a group who he didn’t truly know or trust, and who didn’t know or trust him… For quite some time, Loki believed wholeheartedly that he made a terrible mistake.

Months passed from when he first relented to Thor’s pleas to become an Avenger to when Loki partook in a movie night, and that only happened because Thor physically dragged Loki from his quarters. He lost count of the number of times he turned Maximoff down before finally relenting to her constant requests to spend time together.

In the end, it took over a year for Loki to feel remotely comfortable simply existing in the common areas during the day, going on missions without his brother, or speaking to anyone that was not Thor. Even after so long, he still questioned whether the others valued his contributions to the team, or if they simply tolerated his presence.

“I will admit, the others are not always the most… open-minded, shall we say. Not in the beginning, at least.” Loki chose his words carefully, recognizing the delicate nature of the situation at hand. “However, I truly believe they have moved past the false assumptions, and I would highly recommend you use the opportunity to demonstrate that you are not the terror they assumed you to be.”

“And how do you know that they even want to get to know me?” Theo pressed, piercing blue eyes scrutinizing Loki’s every move.

“Because I was once in a similar position.” The answer slipped out before Loki could stop it. He carefully schooled the surprise from his features; meanwhile, Theo made no effort to hide her skepticism.

“I understand that you may not fully trust me yet – I’m the trickster god, I have a history of manipulating people. Quite frankly, it would be in your best interest not to trust me. But!” Loki admitted, then continued before Theo could get a word in edgewise: “You remind me quite a bit of myself, when I first became an Avenger. I believed the others assumed the worst in me. I held no trust in the others, and in turn they placed no trust in me. It remained as such for quite some time – too long, in hindsight.

“The change in my relationship with my colleagues came when I finally relented to my brother and Maximoff’s incessant attempts to force me to socialize with the others. If it were not them, I would still remain hidden away in my quarters at all hours.

“Honestly, at the time I desired nothing more than to kill them in a spectacular manner for their belligerent pestering and sickening optimism. But between you and I, it helped me far beyond simply becoming a part of the Avengers – it helped me move on from the past that used to define me.”

To be so genuinely forthcoming was a bold decision. Had it been anyone else, he would not have dared to reveal such information, particularly someone so new. However, Theo had a knack for drawing the unexpected from Loki, even if it often caught him by surprise. Additionally, the mystery surrounding Theo piqued his curiosity, which only grew with the reluctance to socialize with the others.

Without taking a risk, there would be no reward.

Theo narrowed her eyes at the God of Mischief, chewing the inside of her cheek as she mulled over his words.

“I remind you of… you?” Distrust clung to every word, only amplified by the doubt written across her expression in big, bold letters.

“Well, yes,” Loki replied coyly. “but you are far more charming and engaging. When I first arrived, I was simply full of spite.” He chuckled, earning a hesitant smile at Theo as a faint hint of pink rose on her cheeks from his compliment. “Had there been no consequence, Stark would have gleefully made a spectacle of launching me off the top of the tower.”

Theo’s shoulders bounced as she chuckled at Loki’s remarks. A sense of relief washed over Loki - perhaps he hadn’t made a mess of things after all.

“The winter soldier, the scarlet witch, myself - at one point or another, we were enemies of various factions of the Avengers. Romanoff is a former black widow, as is Belova. If we can be accepted into the Avengers, I’ve no doubt that you can as well.” Loki assured her, his confidence building with every passing moment. “However, you must be willing to engage.”

Before Theo could roll her eyes and offer a snarky dismissal, Loki held up a finger to silence her.

“At least humor Maximoff once,” he bargained. “I’ve listened to her prattle on endlessly about her excitement at your addition to the Avengers ever since she learned the news, and if I have to endure any more of her moping because you’ve rejected her invitations to socialize, I very well might lose my mind.”

After far too long of a pause, Theo finally answered.

“Okay, fine. I will stop turning down the invites to hang out and I’ll try to ‘play nice’ with the others,” she relented, sounding none too pleased as she straightened up. “For the record, I never agreed to any of this. I am here reluctantly, at best.”

“Yes yes, the reluctant Avenger - you’re not the first one. I wrote the book on it.” Loki ribbed, earning a real laugh from Theo. “Now come, it is far too beautiful of a day to spend it reading such dreary reports. Why not spend your time on something you might enjoy?”

“You know it’s raining outside, right?” Theo pointed to a window behind her, where an onslaught of water undoubtedly pounded against the glass.

“Of course I do;” Loki lightly scoffed. “That’s why it is such a beautiful day - it is perfect for settling in with some literature and forgetting about the tomfoolery the rest of this dreadful realm subjects us to.”

Theo didn’t argue with him, but she continued to peer at him rather suspiciously.

“You have worked non-stop ever since you started here. What is the phrase that you mortals love? All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy? I fear you might become dreadfully dull if you keep this up.”

“Good thing my name isn’t Jack.” Theo winked, her quick-wit making its blessed return.

“All work and no play makes for a rather wretched existence.” Loki amended his statement, smirking at Theo. “What you ought to do is put those reports away, find a novel that you actually enjoy, and join me in the sitting room to indulge in some reading. We might even listen to some of your music over the speakers, since you seem to be averse to silence yet easily startled when you wear your headphones.”

“I don’t know, this Budapest report looks like a great mystery to crack.” Theo shrugged, though her tone no longer held any trace of the tension or animosity that had previously dominated her replies.

Loki rolled his eyes, though he couldn’t bite back a smile.

“Okay,” Theo finally agreed, “let me put this stuff away, and then I’ll come join you.”

As she joined him in the corridor, Loki concluded that one thing was certain: he much preferred Theo’s banter to her thorns.

I need you to be wrong (All along wе both were wrong) I need you to be wrong (All along wе both were wrong)

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