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#also the fact that they are directly responsible for each other's deaths
lucithegreat666 · 1 day
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I just wanna rant about the way a lot of this fandom interprets Lucifer.
People love to woobify Lucifer and I get it he’s small, he’s cute, you wanna fuck him soooo bad /hj but the way everyone sort of infantilizes him because of the way he’s perceived as an Innocent Socially Awkward Bean is so irritating, (especially when you consider that people constantly do this with autistic coded characters but that’s a whole other rant). And yeah he is socially awkward and, arguably, a Bean.
My problem is with the way people seem to forget this guy is the embodiment of the sin of Pride. Gonna put this below a cut cause it’s long lol. Forgive me that this isn’t the moooost well thought out, I’m busy with college and this is just a rant with thoughts I’ve had over the past TWO MONTHS.
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Lucifer is very clear with Charlie that he thinks sinners are inferior and not worth their time and efforts, based on his thousands of years of dealing with them plus his superiority complex as he still perceives himself as more of an angel than a demon. In episode 5 applies this logic to All sinners evenly, as if not one single one could be worth trying to help and he believes at this point that they’ve earned their damnation.
I will say I don’t think it’s fair to use the fact that he agreed to the exterminations as a reason to back this up, because we don’t know yet what the exact circumstances were that led to that agreement. I think it’s possible the exterminations may have made him more jaded, with viewing them as inferior as a way to cope with feeling responsible for their double-deaths. Or it could be the other way around and he didn’t think the exterminations were a big deal. We don’t know yet whether his feelings of superiority came before or after the exterminations and I’m not ready to make a guess.
When he’s talking to a sinner and is tense, it’s not (just) because he’s socially awkward or wasn’t paying attention. He is tense toward the sinners living in the hotel from the moment he notices them.
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(Picture relevant but also just so funny to look at lol. He’s clearly uncomfortable with Angel but he sort of just looks past him and carries on as if he isn’t there. Rude, Lucifer!)
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(This isn’t just a look of being startled, this is a look of startled disgust. Because he doesn’t want to socialize with Mimzy.)
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(This is also disgust. With a hefty side of condescension since he’s been insulted and so unfairly forced to interact with a sinner directly. I’m being facetious here; Lucifer was aloof and it was rude to ignore everyone but Charlie and his creations)
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(This moment would have been a great opportunity for Lucifer to take interest in what was going on, or at least make some small talk with Sir Pentious since he looks so interested in Lucifer! But he’s in his own world, withdrawn. And that’s fine, that’s just how he is, but he truly has NO interest whatsoever in anyone here except himself and Charlie.)
And if you have any doubt that he sees sinners as basically worthless, I suggest rewatching the scene in episode 5 starting from the balcony to Charlie calling him out in not supporting her. Or you can just read these quotes:
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“I love that you want to see the best in people, but these sinners, you know, they're just the worst.”
“Our ‘people,’ Charlie, are awful! They got gifted free will and look what they did with it! Everything's terrible!”
My favorite, when the hotel is under attack and he is standing around doing nothing while the main cast are defending each other and taking up arms: “You see? This is exactly what I'm talking about Charlie. You build something nice, you invite people in and offer them everything and they just bring violence and chaos to your doorstep. It doesn't matter how well intentioned you are, they're always going to disappoint you.”
And the irony of him saying this kills me. Alastor defends the hotel and stops the attack, but ohp! It’s still excessive violence, still typical Sinner Behavior, ew lol (then he has his own excessively violent rampage in episode 8. Lmao what will the angels say!): “Mhm, you see? What'd I tell you? Charlie, sinners are violent psychopaths, hell bent on causing as much pain and destruction as they can. There's really no point in trying.”
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To summarize: Lucifer ignores sinners and pretends they don’t exist in his vicinity whenever possible and struggles to hide his discomfort when he has to be nice to them for the sake of his relationship with Charlie. This discomfort stems from him devaluing their lives’ worth over moral purity and his view of himself and his family as the most Good beings in Hell.
(Now I’d just like to hint at what else I’ve been thinking about: He also doesn’t respect heaven completely despite them being in authority over him and morally superior by his standards. This is the source of his Pride, the cause of his Fall.)
I want to be clear, none of this is to say that Lucifer is a BAD person. The whole point of the show is it’s more complicated than that. I just think his thought process is a lot less “wholesome” than people give him credit for.
Don’t even get me started on what Alastor brings out of Lucifer (I’m already started, I will probably make a post on it at some point, I have so many thoughts).
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wooataes · 7 months
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Bangtan’s Receptionist
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Pairing: Mafia Boss!Min Yoongi x Fem!Reader, implied ot7 x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 1.8k
Warnings: Mafia AU, swearing, Death, blood, injuries, mentions of human trafficking but nothing too detailed, guns, character death.
Summary: Bangtan’s contracts are clear and concise. They are to be followed to the letter, including the most important rule, do not touch their men.
A/N: Just another generic Mafia Yoongi Drabble I couldn’t stop thinking about since Haegeum came out. 🫠 I could possibly turn this into a little oneshot series for each member, let me know if you want more!
- Tae 🥰💜✨
Request to join my taglist here!
Masterlist
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Min Yoongi, in simple terms, is a straight cut business man. With his 6 other colleagues, his brothers, he runs Bangtan Industries, which on the outside seems like a clean cut courier company. On the inside however, the cargo that is transported by Bangtan Industries is more than just letters and stationary for offices. Yoongi and his boys, as the rivals know them, are extremely loyal to their men who work alongside and under them, even so far as to including in contracts that they can be terminated if any harm comes to any member of Bangtan Industries, even as far as the janitor who cleans the office on weekends. Any attack on their men is an attack to them directly, and the whole world knows of this fact.
You were hired 3 years ago by the CEO of Bangtan, Kim Namjoon to be the front of the company, their receptionist and on occasion, assistant for all 7 leaders. They’re all particularly fond of your bubbly presence in the office building, always happily greeting the bosses with a smile and providing homemade lunches on occasion, which usually is more often than not. You always make sure the boys keep their health up, not even phased by their attitudes when they spent too many hours without sleep. You’ve been the most consistent employee, and the members are more than grateful to have you.
“Good morning, Master Min!” You chirp as Min Yoongi strolls through the office door, adjusting his tie. He can’t help but give you a soft smile.
“Y/N, you know that I’d rather you call me Yoongi when its just us. It doesn’t bother me.”
“Oh, I know, I’m just way too used to it!” You grin as you place a take-away coffee cup and a wrapped toasted sandwich on the desk in front of you. “Breakfast is served.”
“You also don’t have to do that every morning too.” He lets out a huff with a grateful smile. “I hope you got your usual too. If I find out you didn’t, I’m forcing you to take your break early to go get.” Yoongi chuckles as you wave the second paper cup on your hands. He nods with finality and takes your makeshift breakfast for him and makes his way to his office.
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After a quiet morning, you’re startled by a loud bang of the doors to the entrance opening and a large man in a 3 piece suit with his gaggle of men trailing in behind him, clearly armed, stalking up to your front desk.
“Good morning, sir. How can I be of help today?” You hum, the large men not phasing you.
“We’re here to see Min.” The man grumbles, hands squeezing the edge of the desk.
“Oh of course,” you smile, typing up on your computer. “Give me a few moments to see if he’s available to see anyone right now.”
You can feel the mans eyes on you as you’re typing, waiting for the response to pop up.
“Ah, I’m sorry sir, Master Min isn’t available right now. You are more than welcome to take a seat and wait until he’s ready-”
You yelp as the man reaches over, grabbing your wrist and pulling you up so you are face to face with him. You wince, his nails digging into your skin and small trickles of blood running down your arm.
“Listen here, you little bitch,” he seethes, “i have been trying to get on Min’s ass for 2 weeks about my fucking cargo I purchased from him and it still hasn’t arrived yet. If you don’t get him out here, I’m storming in there myself and getting my shit back.”
“What on earth is going on here?” Yoongi steps out from his office after hearing the commotion, adjusting the cuff on his white button up as he stalks up to the reception desk. “Ah, Mr Yang. I was waiting for you to show up.”
“Min.” Yang hissed, dropping your wrist and pushing you back into your seat, which Yoongi takes note of. “Where the fuck is my cargo? You said it would be here within the month and yet its the 27th and nothing.”
“Miss L/N.” Yoongi speaks, causing you to snap your head towards him. “Did he hurt you?” He eyes your wrist, which you’re trying to hide under the desk, clearly not very well as it is still in Yoongi’s line of vision.
“O-oh, no, Master Min. I’m fine, really.” You stutter out, giving him a smile.
“I will deal with you after I take care of business.” He murmurs, looking down at your hidden wrist, blood smearing into your blouse. “Mr Yang, if you could come inside. I do believe my receptionist shouldnt have to deal with the likes of this, wouldn’t you agree?” His tone is icy as Yang grunts, nodding his head before pushing past Yoongi and strutting through into his office with his men following behind. “Y/N, I would recommend playing sone music for the next 10 minutes, okay?” is the last thing Yoongi asks of you before closing the door behind him.
“I dont understand why you are so upset, Yang. I gave you exactly what you asked for.” Yoongi hums, sitting at his desk and watching Yang and his men stand over the desk menacingly.
“Thats bullshit and you know it, Min.” He barked, slamming his fist on the table.
“Oh, is it?” He raises his eyebrow, leaning forward and placing his chin on his hands. “Do explain why, because the way I see it, you asked for X amount of drugs and X amount of guns and ammo. Am I wrong?”
“You know what half of those drugs were code for, you ignorant shit.”
“Oh, no no no.” Yoongi chuckled, standing up, revolver in hand. “See, now, if you were implying what you think you are implying, and I truly hope you’re not, then you’ve worked with the wrong man.” He smirked, holding the gun up towards Yang.
“You see, if you read through the terms of our contract - Bangtan do not associate with anything involving trafficking women and children. I truly hope that isnt what you wanted.” Yoongi tilted his head, glaring at Yang. “Is it?”
Yang swallowed lightly, looking between his men, who all have their guns by their sides and their hands up. They know Min’s reputation. They know better than to fuck with them.
“Ah…” Yang sighed anxiously, wiping a bead of sweat from his forehead. “You are right. I believe I was mistaken. It appears that all our cargo was in order. Isn’t that right, boys?” He glanced between his men, who all nod shakily. “Now that we have that misunderstanding out of the way, I don’t think there’s anything else to talk about, so I will take my leave now, Min.” He turns to leave, only to freeze when the revolver now presses against his temple.
“Ah ah ah, not so fast.” Yoongi chuckles, kicking Yang’s knees out from underneath him, forcing him to kneel. “I would’ve been willing to let you go, no questions asked about what fucked up shit you’re into,” he leans down now, whispering into his ear. “but then you laid hands on my receptionist.”
Yang’s eyes widen, struggling against Yoongi’s boot digging into his legs. “What?” he breathed out.
“Did you even read the contract, Yang?” Yoongi hissed now, pressing the gun harder against his head. “Now, you are more than welcome to come in here, ranting and raving about me and the shit I do, I really couldnt give a flying fuck.. but as soon as you touch my people and my men, now theres fucking hell to pay. Rule number fucking 3 my friend. Do NOT touch my men. Do you have anything to say to defend your pathetic ass?”
“I’m sorry,” Yang blubbers out, hands shaking. “I really didn’t mean it, Min! I-I-”
“Save it for hell, Yang.” He squeezes the trigger, letting the body fall to the floor.
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“Come on,” you hissed, aggressively rubbing water over the sleeve of your blouse, earphones blaring music in your ears as Yoongi directed. You’ve been scrubbing for 5 minutes and sadly nothing is working for you. At this point, you haven’t even looked at your arm, now bruising and stained with small trails of your blood.
A figure steps into your line of sight, causing you to lift your head quickly and push the headphones off your head. “Oh, Master Min!” You gasp out, seeing his white shirt splattered with blood. “Did you need me to get your shirt booked in to the dry cleaner?” You start typing up the website to get the booking made when you feel his hand take your wrist.
“Does it hurt?” Yoongi asks quietly, looking down at you through his eyelashes, letting his fingertips run along the marks Yang left.
“O-oh.. um.. a little, but nothing I cant handle!” You smile sweetly at him as he shakes his head.
“You shouldn’t have to handle it at all.” He frowns, using a damp cloth to gently wipe away the trails of your blood before taking some paper towel and drying your arm off. “I do apologize, you didn’t sign up to deal with that shit. I should have been out here waiting for Yang’s arrival.”
“Master Min,” you smiled softly, letting him tend to your arm - you knew it made him feel better when he helped Bangtan with their wounds. “Please don’t stress, I knew what I signed up for for this job.”
You couldn’t help but laugh as he delicately starts placing bright pink Hello Kitty band-aids over your scratch marks.
“Dont laugh.” He grumbles, patting the band-aids down so they stick. “Jimin insisted that we got these to make Taehyung laugh whenever he was hurt.” He lied, Jimin had snuck to you that Yoongi kept his Hello Kitty band-aids with him just in case any of the girls in the office - another word for just you and you alone - were hurt - he just never got to use them until now. But you’d never tell him that you knew. Instead, you just smile and let Yoongi tend to your wounds.
It may not be the best job in the world, but at least you know your bosses have your back.
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sophie-frm-mars · 29 days
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I'm not sure how much people are talking about Aaron Bushnell having engaged with online leftist media, but the records show that they were a viewer of a bunch of different twitch streams, including mine, and subscribed to a bunch of patreons, including mine. I'm not going to inflate my importance here, the livestream link was sent directly to Talia Jane and Anark, so those are probably the voices Bushnell felt the most connected to and followed the most directly, like idk if they also subscribed to someone's patreon after watching a video abt Cars 2 or whatever, I'm not trying to examine whether social media drove the self immolation because I think that's disrespectful to the memory of someone who literally died screaming Free Palestine. I don't personally know of any leftist creators who directly advocate political suicide, and I know that we all share in the political understanding that underscored Bushnell's decision.
I've already made a point of telling my patreon server that my politics are about growing into each other and supporting one another and that if anyone asked me if I thought they should do what Bushnell did I would say no absolutely not.
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I'm ruminating a bit on the nature and meaning of the protest, because a lot of people are engaging with the image of a man in fatigues on fire, standing proud and declaring "FREE PALESTINE", while I've seen others talking about the fact Bushnell's username on several platforms was LillyAnarKitty, mourning the loss of a potential trans sister, talking in depressive terms about the act of suicide, to which I think the people who are engaging in the more macho interpretation of the protest are saying "no it was cool and masculine, it wasn't suicide in the conventional sense it was about principle!" I think there's room for plenty of both. For the record LillyAnarKitty used he and she pronouns in discord servers.
Andreas Malm's approach to self-sacrifice and self-endangerment is that we as subjects of the imperial core are in a sense, precious. Valuable. We are supposedly what it is all for. The imperialist project must be doing it for the citizens of the imperialist nations because if it isn't, then it has to nakedly admit that it is doing it all for the intense power and wealth consolidation of a tiny tiny number of soulless ghouls. Therefore when we put ourselves in harm's way in a way that says you would have to destroy me to get to the thing I care about, we leverage the implicit value of ourselves for our principles. A planned protest by Palestine Action against the London Stock Exchange was allegedly going to involve locking the actionists' necks onto the mechanism of the door into the LSE making it impossible to enter or leave without probably killing them, for example. I think that Bushnell's self immolation sits on a sort of dissonance, my life is precious and my life is worthless. My life is precious and so you should care about the obvious tragedy that I am enacting and my life is worthless if thousands upon thousands of Palestinians are killed as part of the project that enables the life that I lead.
There is also the way that people have debated the meaning of "complicit in genocide" - Bushnell worked in USAF Intelligence and the US has active troops in Palestine, it's possible that they were already culpable in an unknowable number of deaths without having set foot there.
In one sense it's a little pointless to debate the fine details of the meaning of Bushnell's protest in the same way that it's pointless to pick over any feelings of responsibility that I and I know other people that we know they watched are feeling. When I first saw the video I was struck by the language, by their concise and astute analysis and I knew, without knowing just how closely that they were plugged into the same intellectual and political milieu as us. In that same sense I think that they already described what they did the best that any of us are going to be able to:
“My name is Aaron Bushnell. I am an active-duty member of the United States Air Force, and I will no longer be complicit in genocide.”
“I’m about to engage in an extreme act of protest. But compared to what people have been experiencing in Palestine at the hands of their colonizers, it’s not extreme at all. This is what our ruling class has decided will be normal.”
"Free Palestine."
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wave2tyun · 1 month
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killshot | ☆
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pairing: taehyun x fem!reader
genre: spy!au, enemies to lovers, fake dating, slow burn, suggestive, a bit of fluff and angst
summary: your life seemed to have taken a turn for the worse the minute kang taehyun stepped foot into the spy agency you worked at. wanting to take on a challenge to prove yourself worthy of the top position, your plans were turned upside down with his addition to the mission. you didn’t think things could get any worse, until they stated one clear, mandatory condition: the two of you had to pretend you were a couple.
warnings: lots of swearing, alcohol consumption, the reader gets tipsy (twice), mentions of death, guns and bombs (there’s nothing explicit though), the presence of an annoying drunk man | let me know if i missed something!!
word count: 9.7k
a/n: this was just a silly little idea that i got during a car drive asdbfhj whenever i repost fics i always kind of get the urge to say "omg this was one of my favorite fics to write" - i think it's because i end up getting so attached to the little universes that i create and then look back on them fondly; with this one, i really really mean it when i say those words (maybe because it's also longer). when i first posted it i actually felt like i gave birth cause it got SO MUCH LONGER than i anticipated ASBHJDS
☆ = repost from my old blog!!
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"no."
"hear me out-"
"i'm not hearing anybody out. i'm doing this alone- just like we intended from the start" you hissed.
"y/n, we went over this already" irene pinched the bridge of her nose, sighing "the enemy has changed their plan of action, so we need to change it too. it's not safe for you to go alone anymore"
"that i can understand. but him-" you pointed an accusatory finger to the man in front of you “why does he need to be involved in this? there have to be other suitable agents for this mission”
“trust me, darling, if i could do this alone, i would” he replied bitterly, rolling his eyes.
“listen you two- these orders came directly from the head office. they want you to work on this, not anybody else- and there’s nothing that i can do to change this.” irene crossed her arms. she was completely tired of the way you were both behaving- just like two kids continuously throwing sand in each other’s eyes.
“fine.” you gave in, biting your tongue and swallowing your pride. there was no use being stubborn if the head office was involved, the best thing you could do in this situation was to choose being the bigger person.
irene raised an eyebrow at taehyun, waiting for his response as well.
“fine-“ he repeated after you, throwing daggers towards your direction. you were glad to know the feeling of disgust was mutual.
“finally” irene exclaimed, letting out a big sigh “took you long enough. here’s the modified plan papers. remember- there’s no way i’m allowing you to back out anymore”
you took the small stack of papers from her hands, skimming through the text. gather the gadgets and weapons, bla bla bla, disarm the bomb hidden at the event, bla bla bla, protect france’s president, bla bla bla, disguise yourself as a couple- wait.
“are you fucking kidding me- am i reading this right?” you spat out, eyes almost popping out at the sight. you went over the passage again and again, hoping that you had simply misread it- but there it was, black ink on white paper, the word written clear as day: “couple”
irene massaged her temples with her hands “in order for this mission to be carried out with ease, we need you to act as a cou-“
“no” you both said in unison, cutting her off.
you side-eyed taehyun, somehow feeling offended that he also declined the proposal right away. you knew you had your reasons to not accept that condition- but why was he saying “no”?
kang fucking taehyun- his name alone felt like poison on your tongue.
but it wasn’t like your hatred towards him was unjustified- in fact, you couldn't remember if there was even one second- let alone one day- where him just breathing didn’t make you feel like plotting murder. one day, he just strutted into the agency, acting like he owned the place. he was quick to gain respect from his superiors, his charms alone making it easier for him to receive more complicated missions- and better equipment. you being mad was an understatement. why? just because he was a man, he had it all easy. he has been in the agency for just one year, and he has already surpassed you in ranks, all of the hard work you’ve been putting in for years going down the drain.
you’ve been relentlessly trying to regain your honorable place in the agency. kang taehyun was quick to catch on to your little act, and he wasn’t one to back off easily either- resulting in the two of you being at each other’s necks every second. you viewed this mission as what could have possibly been ‘your redemption arc’. the universe somehow always found a way to get him involved in your business. but this time, you weren’t gonna let him steal your spotlight- not again. you needed to find a way to secure the number one place in rankings like you used to, and you were willing to do whatever it took to feel that glory one more time, even if that meant cooperating with the kang taehyun.
“if you die, i’ll kill you” you hissed.
“big words coming from someone who stands on a chair to reach the top shelves” he fought back, unfazed by your threat. your mouth opened at this accusation, when did he even catch you doing that?
“you piece of-“
“enough” irene sighed, moving to stand between the two of you “you’re gonna bring back my migraines if you keep on acting like that. can’t you treat each other as normal people do? just this once- please? you’re only making this harder for yourselves”
you sighed, rubbing the nape of your neck. irene was a sweetheart, she didn’t deserve to be the victim of your petty fight “when do we have to start?”
her eyes seemed to light up a bit, relieved by your change in attitude “as soon as possible” she skimmed through her notes again “the earliest flight is in 3 days- how about it?”
“that’s okay for me” you said. you silently glanced over at taehyun, who rolled his eyes, uncrossing his arms “guess i’m in too”.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
5 hours.
that was the amount of time you had to endure sitting next to taehyun on the flight. you could handle this, you tried to tell yourself. you’ve been in much worse situations during some of your missions. in the end, it didn’t necessarily mean that the two of you had to interact during that time. you could just sleep the whole flight away and not have to exchange a word with taehyun once.
wrong.
kang taehyun just seemed to love seeing you suffer, in any way, shape or form. it had you seriously contemplating whether he was some kind of sadist. you thought you could at least go through check in and security without any unpleasant incidents happening, but you were wrong- so painfully wrong.
you arrived two hours early to the airport, wanting to get done with the whole process as fast as possible then hide from taehyun at the food court until it was time for you to board the plane. however, two minutes after you took your place in the check-in line, your peace was disrupted.
“you’re early- were you that eager to see me, sweetheart?”
your eye was twitching at the sound of the nickname. you didn’t even have to turn your head to the right to know who was next to you.
“why did it have to be you here at this hour?” you grumbled.
“crazy- it’s almost as if we’re on the same flight” he rolled his eyes “don’t even think about going to the back of the line- we have the same last name on the tickets so we shouldn’t go separately anyway”
you loosened your grip on the suitcase and bit your cheek, it was like he knew your exact thoughts at the moment. the whole thing was all too corny for you- why did the company have to change your name and give you new documents? just because you were ‘a couple’ didn’t mean that you had to be married as well.
security didn’t exactly go smooth either- as if the whole process wasn’t already stressful enough. you should have been suspicious the moment taehyun let you sit in front of him at the line. at that moment, you just brushed it off and thought nothing of it, but when the metal detector went off as you were walking through- that’s when it all clicked.
that little fucker slipped one of his rings in your pocket.
a string of unholy words was running wildly in your mind as the security patted you down to search for any suspicious items. you wished you could jump on him and wipe that grin off his face. he somehow felt the need to embarrass you even further once the ring had been found. he put on a charming smile as he rubbed the nape of his neck, looking up at the security lady “so sorry for my wife- she tends to be quite clumsy, i told her before to check well before walking away from me”
the lady melted down in an instant, letting out a bunch of ‘it’s okay’ before handing you back the ring. he felt the need to make such a scene and for what? to feed his ego? you didn’t bother to wait until he was through with security as well. you gathered your things from the tray as fast as you could, storming past all the other people to get further away from him.
you browsed all the shops (sometimes even hiding in the dressing rooms) until you couldn’t avoid taehyun any longer. you didn’t talk to him once you met up again, even though you knew that it didn’t affect him anyway. nonetheless, taehyun ensured that your day would have a cherry on top- by stealing the one and only window seat.
and you?
you made sure to spill your water on him during turbulence.
that seemed to be enough to make him stop bothering you throughout the flight. he slept away as you played sudoku on your phone, too paranoid to fall asleep yourself in case he would wake up with new ideas in mind.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
after making sure that your bag smacked taehyun’s head when you took it from the upper storage, you both went to retrieve your luggage then headed out to find a taxi and go to your accommodation.
valets, chandeliers, grand paintings adoring the walls, the hotel seemed quite fancy. you weren’t really used to this kind of treatment from your agency, it was the least they could do for all the headaches you were going to endure throughout the mission.
the receptionist handed you the small paper sleeve containing the key cards. you furrowed your brows as you opened it, peering inside. there were 2 cards in there, but for the exact same hotel room. you instantly expressed your confusion “why is there just one r-“ taehyun kicked your foot, continuing to smile at the receptionist as you bit your tongue to hold back a scream. “is there anything else i can help you with?” she inquired.
“i’m pretty sure that’s it, thank you” taehyun answered before you could open your mouth to speak. he took hold of your arm, flashing the receptionist another fake smile before dragging you along with him towards the elevator.
“don’t touch me” you broke free from his grip “what the hell was that about?”
taehyun pressed the floor number on the keypad “are you that fucking dense? he sighed exasperatedly “we’re a couple- remember? we need to act like one, so stop having these unnecessary slip-ups”
‘stupid cover’ you cursed in your mind the person who had been in charge for outlining the plans for your mission. out of all the possible lies they could have made you hold on to- this is what they went for. it was almost like they did this on purpose to annoy you.
ding.
you took hold of your suitcase again, following behind taehyun as you searched for your room “besides- the hotel isn’t scruffy this time, their budget seems to be pretty high for once. so, they might have booked us a suite, not just a single room” he continued, trudging the door open.
your feet were frozen, not moving an inch from the doorway “taehyun- this is not a fucking suite” you snarled, slowly turning your head in his direction.
“why are you talking as if it’s my fault?” taehyun snapped back. he entered the room, bumping his shoulders against yours as you refused to go further in.
“well if you hadn’t been so quick to silence me at the reception- maybe this wouldn’t have been a problem” you pushed your suitcase in, putting your hands on your hips.
“and risk blowing our cover? yeah- what a great plan that would have been” he huffed.
“there’s no way i’m sharing a bed with you” you hissed
“don’t worry- it’s not a pleasure for me either sweetheart. it’s either sleeping on the floor- or with me. your choice”
taehyun didn’t seem like he would ever consider giving up his spot on the bed- but neither did you. you weren’t going to settle for back pain as he snored away on the soft mattress.
so, you laid down on the bed, as far away as you could from taehyun. you were sitting so close to the edge that you were on the verge of falling off, but you couldn't even stand the mere thought of being in such close proximity to him. the thought of his arm touching yours made your skin crawl. 
yet, despite breathing in the same room as taehyun, you somehow managed to get what was probably the best sleep of your life. keeping your eyes closed just for one moment more, you held the blanket closer to you, enjoying the warmth it provided, snuggling your face deeper into the pillow beneath you. but the pillow wasn't as soft as you remembered when you put your head down to sleep last night. instead, it was hard, and somehow hot to the touch. confused, you brought a hand up and pressed down on it, slightly squeezing it, then removed it as if you had just gotten burnt when you were met with the feeling of bare skin on skin.
"if you wanted to touch me that badly you could have just asked, love" a raspy voice came from beneath you.
"what the fuck-" you shouted as you got up and finally opened your eyes. you squinted as you adjusted to the bright light coming from the sun.
kang taehyun was sitting right next to you, bare chest exposed and a playful smirk plastered on his face.
"how did we- when did you even take your shirt off?"
"are you always this loud in the morning?" he asked, ignoring your questions. his hair was a ruffled mess, slightly puffy face indicating that he hadn't been awake for that long either.
you still looked at him expectingly, waiting for him to answer. he huffed, rolling his eyes "you snuggled with your burning limbs close to me as you slept. i got overwhelmingly hot so i took off my shirt. there- simple as that"
"why didn't you just push me off or something" you asked. it wasn’t typical for him to act like this.
what taehyun said was indeed the truth. he couldn’t stand you- yes, but he wasn’t an asshole. he couldn’t find it in him to wake you up or pry you off him, as he didn’t want to wake up in the morning to you being groggy. therefore, he was left with only one option: enduring it.
pushing your question aside once more, taehyun got up from the bed, stretching as he made his way to the bathroom, he stopped right before getting past the door to speak "did you know you talk in your sleep? you seemed to enjoy it, i didn't want to ruin the fun for you." he snickered, disappearing into the other room.
you stood there with your jaw hanging, unable to form any kind of comeback to argue. was there even a way to recover from that? when you heard the shower running, you took a pillow from the bed, burying your face into it and silently screaming. you wanted to dig a hole for yourself at least 20 meters underground.
after regaining your composure, you got ready so that you and taehyun could get started on today’s task: gathering the necessary weapons and equipment. irene informed you about some namjoon guy they had a contract with. he apparently sold any kind of gear you would ever need for a mission: from smoke bombs to lethal poison- he had it all. you went to the outskirts of the city searching for a shabby cabin (not suspicious at all), the storage hidden away in an underground system there.
“are you sure this is the right place?” you asked taehyun, eyeing the old rusty door. the whole place just screamed ‘murder’, how exactly did your agency even come to find out about the guy? maybe you didn’t want to know.
“the coordinates match up with what irene sent us- so yeah, probably. try not to hold my hand if you’re so scared” he chuckled.
you ignored his childish remark, going past him to open the heavy door. the inside didn’t match up with the exterior, it was surprisingly warm and cozy. a man with purple hair and a black dress shirt was sitting on an armchair, book in hand. you assumed it was namjoon.
“oh- hello?” you didn’t exactly know how to approach him, you felt bad for barging in without even knocking.
his eyes glanced up from the book “ah” he got up “finally, i was worried irene didn’t send you the right location” he flashed you a dimpled smile. for a man who owned over one thousand weapons, you didn’t expect him to be this...cute?
taehyun bit his cheek “so you’re namjoon?”
“yes, and i already know who you two are. come on- follow me”
namjoon lead you towards an elevator, hidden away from curious eyes in a crowded closet. the ride down seemed almost endless, but that’s how it needed to be. if one single gunshot could be heard from the surface, his entire business could risk being destroyed.
“i’ve got a couple of things for you to try, as well as some accessories irene asked me to give you” namjoon put down a box on a table. it wasn’t anything out of the ordinary- laser pen, tracking devices, coat button cameras, the usual. the guns weren’t exactly essential for your mission, they were more of a safety precaution. either way, you still had to practice using them.
getting into the designated practice area, you and taehyun each had a target to hit. you needed at least 5 good shots in a row to be deemed skilled enough for the weapon. taehyun’s first try was perfect, meanwhile yours barely hit the target.
“seems like someone’s rusty”
“beginner’s luck” you mumbled.
giving it another go, you ended up with the same result. the exact thing happened the 3rd try as well. you frowned, it wasn’t usually like this for you, and taehyun’s cocky smirk only made your blood boil further.
“nervous?” he chuckled
“i’m just warming up- i need to get used to it” you got back into your shooting stance, putting your finger on the trigger.
“take your time, darling, hell’s happy to wait for you”
you missed again.
“can you just shut up for one fucking minute?” you huffed. you didn’t want to let taehyun get to you, but even when he didn’t open his mouth to speak you could still hear his voice in your mind, mocking you.
“i can give you something else if you want to-“ namjoon tried to help, not knowing he only angered you further.
“i need him out of sight- not another weapon” you quickly dismissed him “can i get a private practice room?”
“practicing in private won’t fix your lack of talent” you heard taehyun whisper.
if looks could kill, taehyun would be on the floor the second those words left his mouth “if i point this gun towards your direction i’ll make sure that it won’t be a miss” you fumed.
namjoon was clearly taken aback by the tension in the room. desperate to diffuse the situation, he kindly asked taehyun to look around the other areas as you practiced a few more rounds with him.
you felt bad for the guy, he was a victim to yet another one of your fights with taehyun. you kept the rest of your interactions with him short, wanting to get back to the hotel as soon as possible.
“look- i’ll buy you ice cream, will that make it better?” taehyun asked exasperatedly.
“i’m not a fucking child” you snarled. the only thing up until now that taehyun had managed to do successfully was ridiculing you- and you were fed up with it. did he think that some ice cream was going to erase all those embarrassing moments he had been putting you through?
“well what do you want me to do then?” he sighed.
“i don’t know- maybe stop acting like an asshole? like you’re better than me?”
taehyun stopped the car on the side of the road, his hands gripping the steering wheel harder “i’m not acting like an asshole” he turned his head to look at you.
“yes, you are- you did that the whole day and you are doing that right now” you said in utter disbelief. his snarky attitude was tipping you over.
“get out” he spoke firmly, breaking eye contact with you.
“what?”
taehyun didn’t know how much longer he could be with you in the car without losing his temper even more “i said get out” he repeated once again, closing his eyes “go on and find the way to the hotel yourself”
“fine” you scoffed. you grabbed your purse and slammed the car door as hard as you could once you got out of the vehicle. taehyun wasted no time getting back on the road. finally, he could breathe again.
“jerk” you screamed. what a great time to wear heels this was. you made your way to the side walk, shielding your eyes from the sun with your hands as you looked around, trying to recall any familiar surroundings. with every step you took, it felt like your foot was pressed into a hot piece of lego. you had been wearing those damn heels all day, and now the agonising pain was finally starting to kick in.
taehyun couldn’t help but constantly steal glances at you from the rearview mirror, watching as you struggled to walk without your feet wobbling. sighing, he waited until he could take a turn to go back and pick you up. maybe you weren’t the only one that acted like a kid.
getting back to the same spot he just left you at barely 2 minutes ago, taehyun stopped the car. yet you weren’t anywhere to be found. he got out to search the area better- nothing.
“shit” he mumbled under his breath.
taehyun couldn’t stay still as he waited for you to return. of course, he got to the hotel faster because of the car, but what was taking you so long to arrive? the thought of him ruining the mission because of a petty fight was tormenting his mind. he didn’t want to lose his job at the agency because of you. he kept on walking back and forth from the couch to the door, looking through the peephole for any sign of you coming down the hallway. and just as he was about to check again, for probably the 30th time that night, he heard knocking on the door. it was you- it had to be you. after all, the only other room key had remained with him, and there was no way someone else would disturb him at this ungodly hour.
taehyun cleared his voice, erasing any sign of worry on his face before opening the door, apology already on the tip of his tongue.
"y/n, i'm sorry-" taehyun spoke as soon as he saw you in the doorway, reaching his hand out to take your purse.
"fuck off" you spat out, slapping his hand away from you. you went straight to the bathroom and locked the door, not in the mood to hear any of his excuses. you stood with your back against the door, burying your face in your hands. you felt so tired and sick of having to deal with taehyun’s attitude. but you weren't gonna let him be the one to steal the spotlight from your mission- not again.
taehyun sighed heavily in front of the door, putting his hand down from knocking, choosing to simply let you be for a while. you had all the right to be mad, and he knew that.
you took a shower to cool off, refusing to look taehyun in the eyes, or even in his direction at all, as you got ready to go to sleep.
taehyun put his finger on the lamp's button, letting out those words that had been bugging him all night "just so you know- i did go back for you today, but i couldn't find you anymore. maybe that's gonna convince you that i really meant it when i said sorry" taehyun flicked off the light, huffing, pitch black darkness taking over the room.
you stayed silent, with your back turned to him, still too stubborn to accept his apology. 'he just wants to go to bed with a clean conscience' you tried to convince yourself. ・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
you were grateful to have woken up with your own personal space, unlike your first night there. taehyun wasn’t even on his side of the bed, the sound of the water running indicating that he had already beat you to the bathroom. you turned over to the side, ready to enjoy those few minutes of peace.
“huh” you brought a hand to your face, feeling something on your forehead. it was a sticky note. you rubbed your eyes, trying to make sense of what was written on the small piece of paper.
‘there’s ice cream in the freezer’
“what...” you mumbled, how did ice cream have anything to do with- oh.
you fought back a chuckle. so, the great taehyun couldn’t find the strength to own up to his actions and say the words ‘sorry’ a second time. still, you accepted his silent apology, going over to the freezer to get your hands on the sweet treat. how could you ever say no to something free?
taehyun got out of the bathroom as you still nibbled on the ice cream sandwich, the steam and heat instantly invading the room. you looked up from the piece of food in your hand, almost dropping it once your eyes laid on him. taehyun sat in the middle of the room, chest and sculpted abs on full display with a few water droplets adoring his skin from his still dripping hair.
“what are you blushing for? it’s not the first time you’re seeing me like this” he smirked.
“idiot- it’s the heat. your shower transformed the room into a whole sauna” you meekly tried to defend yourself, not wanting to give him any satisfaction. you cursed your cheeks for reacting like this well before your mind could even comprehend the situation.
“oh- so you’re talking to me again. i take it you forgive me?” he leaned against the door.
“don’t get ahead of yourself kang taehyun” you scoffed “it’s gonna take more than just an ice cream for me to fully forgive you”
“i know, you did tell me yesterday that ‘you’re not a child’. just thought it might sweeten that sour attitude of yours” he huffed.
“whatever- let me get changed, then we’ll get in touch with irene” you said as you walked over to your suitcase to grab some clean clothes.
“i already talked to her. she said there’s nothing we have to do for the day. we just need to wait for the big event tomorrow.”
“huh- you talked to her? when?” you raised your eyebrows at him. you could swear you hadn’t heard a single sound all morning.
“yeah- while you were busy snoring” he chuckled.
you scoffed at his reply “as if you’re a saint while you’re sleeping” there he went again with his ridiculous accusations.
“well- unlike you, i haven’t received any complaints from others” he winked at you.
“really? then here’s your first one- you’re loud as hell” you slammed the bathroom door. that wink and his cocky grin were enough to bring back the annoyance he always seemed to provoke within you.
taehyun loudly knocked as you were busy brushing your teeth “how long are you gonna stay in there? i have something to ask”
you rolled your eyes, taking the toothbrush out of your mouth to reply “i’ll be out in 5 minutes” you shouted back. you didn’t know whether it was curiosity or fear taking over you from his words.
taehyun was still in front of the door when you opened it to get out.
“wanna take advantage of the activities here? it’s not like we’re paying for any of this- the agency is. plus- we have the day off anyway” taehyun shrugged his shoulders. his proposal didn’t sound bad at all. you could definitely use some sort of relaxation, your whole body was still aching from walking in heels yesterday.
you put your hands over your mouth, gasping exaggeratedly “finally, i can’t believe there’s good ideas coming out of your mouth” you were actually excited for once about one of taehyun’s suggestions. this was your chance to detach yourself from all the stress, the mission, and most importantly- him.
“when do i not have good ideas?” taehyun brought a hand to his chest. he sounded offended by your statement.
“i’m not going to answer that.” you replied shortly.
grabbing your bathrobes from the reception, you and taehyun headed towards the hotel’s spa facility. the area was filled with all sorts of natural plants and bamboo furniture, the meditation music being accompanied by the quiet sound from the mini artificial waterfall in the middle of it all. having such a packed schedule all the time, you never got any opportunities to spoil yourself in places like this. the anticipation and excitement were making your heart bubble up with joy, but your smile quickly dropped once you arrived in the massage room.
“taehyun, why didn’t you mention the hotel activities being couple activities” you hissed. standing in the doorway, you looked in terror at the swarm of lovey dovey pairs sitting on yoga mats in front of you.
“did you think i made the proposal knowing that?” he scoffed.
“well i can’t seem to understand how you overlooked such a major detail??”
“listen- the poster said couple massages. how the hell was i supposed to know that they’re making us do the work for each other? i just thought we’d both get a massage done at the same time”
“you must be the kangs, welcome” the host greeted you “come on, sit down. we were just getting started with a simple shoulder massage” she pointed to the last empty mat in the room, then motioned for you to begin.
taehyun’s eyelids fluttered shut as you awkwardly placed your hands on his shoulders, the material of the robe doing almost nothing to hide the feeling of the rock hard muscles underneath. you grimaced as you pressed your fingers down, trying to reminisce the movements you’d use while preparing pizza dough.
“you’re doing it wrong” he deadpanned, opening his eyes to make direct eye contact with you.
“shut the hell up”
you didn’t know what you were doing- yes. but were you going to admit that to taehyun? absolutely not. rolling your eyes, you continued to clumsily massage the tense muscles.
“i can’t feel a goddamn thing” he complained again.
“how about now?” you pinched his skin between your thumb and your index finger, using as much pressure as you could. taehyun’s face distorted in pain as he crumbled beneath you “for fuck’s sake-“ he grabbed your wrists, stopping you from provoking him even more suffering “how are you so bad at this?”
frustrated, you moved your hands away from his body “if you think you’re that great, why don’t you give it a shot?”
“i will give it a shot” he snarled.
the host approached the two of you just as taehyun placed his hands on you “what a lovely couple” she smiled. nudging taehyun, she whispered one more thing before walking away “remember, use your hands gently, like you’re touching the most delicate petal”
taehyun’s ears turned a bright shade of red at the sound of that. he bit his lip so hard trying not to laugh at her words, you were surprised he didn’t end up drawing blood.
“close your eyes, petal” he snickered.
you snorted at the nickname, doing as he said regardless. taehyun’s hands were surprisingly warm. he did his best mimicking the actions from the couples around you, his long slender fingers massaging your muscles with such care, you could feel all the built-up tension melting away.
“wait- this is kinda nice” you spoke quietly.
“told you so”
you hoped taehyun wouldn’t catch that, but of course, he did. you opened one eye, tempted to wipe that cocky smirk off his face. getting ahold of yourself, you chose not to, you never knew when taehyun would treat you this nicely again. you sighed, allowing yourself to enjoy the feeling. this was the least he could do to pay you back for all the headaches he had caused you so far throughout the mission.
you did make a few other attempts to give taehyun a massage, but even with the host’s instructions, he was never satisfied. in the end, he gave up, preferring to do all the work himself instead of letting you touch him again. he probably left the spa room feeling more tense than when he had arrived, the only thing bringing him some sort of consolation being the free bottle of wine at the end of the lesson- which he opened as soon as you came back to your hotel room.
after getting changed, you sat down next to taehyun on the bed, noticing only one wine filled glass on the table “aren’t you gonna share that?”
“after all the pain i’ve went through today? don’t think so” he replied before taking a sip of the crimson beverage.
“don’t be a jerk” you snapped back “i tried my best”
taehyun sighed heavily, grabbing the other clean glass in the room to pour you some of the wine. you muttered a quick ‘thanks’ before taking it from his hands, downing the liquid almost immediately.
“what the fuck are you doing” he grabbed your wrist “take it easy- our mission is tomorrow, i don’t think you want to wake up with a headache” there was a hint of worry hidden in his stern voice.
“a bit more won’t hurt- i just want to sleep well tonight” you replied. your hand was already reaching for the bottle to pour another one. taehyun simply rolled his eyes, hoping that you’d stop after the seccond glass. yet- you repeated your actions, downing the glass and going for the bottle right after. this time, taehyun snatched it away from your hands and hid it behind the bed.
“don’t ruin the fun-“ you furrowed your brows “just give me the bottle”
you stood up, towering over taehyun as you extended your arm. he wasn’t expecting you to put up such a fight, but his reflexes were sharp- he took hold of your arm quickly, making you lose your balance and stumble over him. his hand came down to your waist to hold you as you landed in his lap, not allowing you to slip away anymore. you looked at him with wide eyes, your loud heartbeat drumming against his chest. “don’t make me repeat myself” he muttered.
“or what?” you provoked him further. your eyes shifted their focus on his lips, sitting centimeters apart from yours. you had never paid attention before to how soft they looked- so soft and rosy, your mind couldn’t help but wander off and think about how they would feel on yours. taehyun seemed to become nervous underneath your gaze, his breathing became ragged, hand gripping your waist slightly tighter. he licked his lips before moving his face closer to yours, yet still not enough to fully close the gap. your eyelids fluttered shut, and he smirked at your action, his thumb coming to graze your lower lip slowly.
“or you might just make me lose myself completely” he breathed out. his gaze was still fixated on your lips, only tempting him further to give in, to let go of everything that had been holding him back until now from accepting that it wasn’t hatred he felt upon seeing you, or even hearing your name. he had been convinced that you hating him meant that he was supposed to feel the same, but he couldn’t- and he could barely even fake it anymore. especially now, when you somehow managed to completely break down his guard in mere seconds. thinking this through, taehyun chose to back away. he didn’t have the confirmation whether it was your actual feelings leading your actions, or just the alcohol in your system.
he cleared his throat, removing his hands from your body and putting that usual cold façade back on “like i’ve said, our mission is tomorrow. you should probably go to bed” his eyes didn’t meet yours when you opened them to look at him again.
your gaze shifted to the floor, you were unable to hide the underlying disappointment in your voice “yeah- you’re right”. you hesitated a bit before finally separating yourself from him, the warmth of his body gone just as the excitement that was beginning to take over your heart. you put your head down on the pillow, the sound of more wine getting poured in a glass being heard as you closed your eyes and drifted off to sleep.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・ "your tie is lopsided, let me fix that" you walked over to taehyun. there was just one hour left until the event started. the atmosphere in the room was suffocating, to say the least.
taehyun scoffed upon hearing that "i can definitely do a better job than you" yet, he didn't make any movement to stop you from touching him or his clothes “everything is just a competition for you… isn’t it?” you said bitterly, your eyes were fixated on his chest, his tie in your hand. 
“isn’t it for you, too?” taehyun asked. he immediately regretted his question, the words seemed to roll off his tongue as an automatic response. he peered into your eyes, although he was hesitant to hear your answer. you paused for a moment before continuing, refusing to look up and meet his gaze "maybe i don't want it to be anymore"
you went back to the mirror, trying to look busy as you "fixed" your makeup, although you had already ensured it was perfect with each step you did.
taehyun didn't say anything to that. it wasn't the time he could let himself be swayed by his emotions. you were both at the peak of your mission, where high attention was demanded and no mistakes were allowed to be made. he cleared his throat before speaking, trying to change the conversation from the sensitive topic "you look good" "thanks" you looked down, playing a bit more with the lipstick in your hand before stuffing it in your purse "we should go" "yeah- we should" he repeated after you, grabbing the spare card for your hotel room.
the entire venue was filled with well-known people from the political field, as well as celebrities. the event had been long planned to celebrate the president’s birthday. however, he started to have a rising suspicion that someone was after him, wanting to backstab him so that they could steal his position, which is how you got into the play. your team was able to pinpoint the enemy’s plan of action due to their sloppy preparation. they talked freely around Élysée Palace about their intention, completely unaware of the mics hidden all around the building. they were going to infiltrate the office and place a bomb there, wiping out the president without putting themselves at much risk.
being nervous was an understatement. it’s been long since you’ve been assigned such an important mission- way too long. the fact that you didn’t know whether you were going to make direct contact with the enemy didn’t help either.
taehyun seemed to be glued to your side, not letting you go once. he held you by the waist the whole time you were walking around, searching for your table. his eyes were trained on you, not allowing the disgusting rich men in the room to think that they can lay a finger on you, not even for one second.
“why do you keep on holding me so close?” you wondered aloud.
“we need to act like a couple- did you forget that again?”
“that doesn’t mean i’m not allowed to walk on my own” you said trying to break yourself free yourself from his grip. but taehyun stopped you before you could fully do so, he grabbed your wrist, bringing your back flushed against his chest. he dipped down to whisper in your ear “sweetheart, let’s not make a scene now- shall we?” he twirled you around, swaying your body to the rhythm of the music to disguise your actions as natural.
“now- let’s discuss. when do you want to put our plan into action?” he leaned down to whisper once again. his voice sent shivers down your spine.
“not yet- we haven’t been here for long and leaving so early would raise suspicion” you muttered.
“then- how about a drink?” taehyun brought you closer, not breaking eye contact with you.
you nodded “a drink sounds good” just like the ‘massage’, there was no way you could turn down something you didn’t have to pay for yourself.
taehyun spun you around once more before heading off to the bar. you continued the search for your table, settling down on one of the chairs as you waited for him.
“what is a princess like you doing all alone?” a sleazy man approached you, reeking of sweat and alcohol. your senses were instantly on high alert, you were praying that taehyun wouldn’t take much longer to return.
“i’m not alone- i’m just waiting for someone” you tried to dismiss him, hoping that he would walk away and leave you alone. but a man’s confidence seems to skyrocket when they drink, so of course, he didn’t back down so easily.
“say, why won’t you have a drink with me while you wait?” his hand was in motion, inching closer to touch your shoulder. it abruptly stopped upon hearing a voice from behind him.
“i’m afraid i’ve already taken care of that, sir” taehyun settled down the drinks on the table before occupying the empty chair next to you. he noticed from far away how uncomfortable you looked and he rushed to get back to you, almost spilling the drinks in the process.
he placed one of his hands on your knee, trying to give the man a subtle hint that he should give up and leave you alone.
“i’m sure one more drink wouldn’t hurt? right, miss?” he continued.
taehyun clicked his tongue, increasingly annoyed by his presence “i’m pretty sure it would, though”
the man’s smile was wiped off his face as soon as taehyun said that, his hand gripped his bottle of beer tighter “why won’t you let her answer, hm?”
you were unsure what to do- you wanted to get rid of him, but you didn’t want to anger him further either. you weren’t supposed to draw any kind of attention towards yourselves, if this were to turn into a big argument, it could damage your mission badly. taehyun’s hand on your knee felt reassuring. at the same time, it made your heart skip a beat whenever he gave it a light squeeze.
“what if i search for you once i finish this first, would that be good?” you did your best fake smile, so that he wouldn’t see directly through your lie. somehow, that answer was good enough for him. he nodded, smiled, then walked away.
taehyun slumped into the chair, taking a sip of the cognac he ordered.
“thank you” you spoke softly “you came just at the right moment”
taehyun’s ears turned red at that “now maybe you understand why i wasn’t letting you go before” he played with the glass in his hand. you bit your lip and nodded, taking a sip of the drink yourself. taehyun had good taste.
you both settled for analysing your surroundings as you drank, making small remarks here and there about the people around you. however, once your glasses were empty, taehyun could already notice the same man approaching your table again. he got up abruptly, taking your wrist and tugging you along with him.
“hey- what’s gotten into you?” you asked. you couldn’t figure out the expression he had on his face, nor his actions. taehyun loudly knocked on the bathroom door. upon hearing no answer, he dragged you in, locking the door after him “weren’t you the one saying that we shouldn’t make a scene?”
“and what was i supposed to do? sit there and watch as he tried to touch you again?” he huffed.
“why are you acting like this? maybe i wouldn’t have minded having a drink with another man” you provoked him further. that wasn’t actually the case- the quick lie slipped past your lips in the heat of the moment, as you were curious to see where he was going to end up with this.
"oh really?" taehyun pressed his tongue against his cheek, crossing his arms. he took a step closer towards you, to which, at first, you chose not to react.
"yes, really."
you tried to sound confident as you talked, but taehyun took note of your pursed lips “you know, lying doesn't suit you, sweetheart." he took another step towards you then another- until you had no choice but to take a few steps back yourself, not stopping until your back hit the wall.
“you know what? i don’t get you-“ you snapped “and i’m tired of trying to figure you out” you pressed a finger to his chest, letting out all those pent-up frustrations that had been tormenting you for the past few days “you keep on giving me these mixed signals- your actions never seem to match your words. how do you even think i felt today? or after last night? do you even care about that?”
you chuckled drily as taehyun remained silent. “why won’t you just give me a clear answer?” your gaze dropped to the floor "if you had the guts, kang taehyun, you would have kissed me"
taehyun's eyes looked sharp, he inched closer to you, bringing your chin up with his hand so that he could look directly into your eyes "you think something is stopping me from doing that right now?" he tilted his head and smirked, slight amusement hidden in his voice.
"then do it" you said firmly, pushing him over the edge.
taehyun slipped his other hand on the small of your back, holding you close so that he could press his mouth on yours, hot and heavy. he wasted no time to lick your lips with his tongue, silently asking for permission to deepen the kiss. you opened your mouth for him, the feeling of his lips and tongue even more intoxicating than the alcohol that you had consumed earlier that night. he lifted one of your legs up, letting his fingers dance along the bare skin that was revealed once your dress slid up with the movement. your body felt hot all over, you hadn't even known how badly you were craving for his touch until you got to experience it. you clasped your hands behind his neck, then dragged them along his back, slightly scratching it with your nails. taehyun groaned at the feeling, hoisting your other leg up as well so that you could wrap them both around his waist. he moved on to your neck, biting at the skin in a slightly hidden area. it was just enough to remind that man and all those other people lurking after you tonight that you were only his. he carried you over to the sink, putting you on the edge of the counter there so that he could have better access to your neck.
there was knocking on the door, followed by the rattling of the doorknob.
"tae-"
taehyun put his index finger over your lips, shushing you as he covered you whole in kisses: your neck, your collarbones, your chest, all the way down to the valley of your breasts, the area exposed by the cleavage of your dress.
"they'll leave" he spoke against your skin.
the image of a ticking clock crossing your mind every now and then filled you with worry and pressure "we should leave too-" taehyun pressed his finger over your lips once more.
"tae-" you breathed out again "-the mission"
"just a bit more” he whispered “there's still time" he looked up at you, those big eyes of his, filled to the brim with desire, pleaded you to let him continue. you grabbed the collar of his shirt, connecting your lips with his again. you sighed in contentment, letting him take control over the kiss. soft gasps and wet lips, his warm mouth on your skin- you got lost into it all, not caring for one second whether your hair or your dress were turning into a mess.
you could barely bring yourself to stop, and when you did, it felt like your cheeks had been set on fire. you hid your face in the crook of taehyun’s neck, breathing heavily against his skin as your brain finally processed what had just happened between the two of you.
you kissed kang taehyun
no-
you made out- with kang taehyun
and you enjoyed it.
in fact, you enjoyed it so much you seriously contemplated ditching the event just to feel his lips on yours for a few moments more.
the rational part of you was stronger “come on- we have a mission to complete” you pressed a quick peck on taehyun’s lips. he smiled, taking his time to fix your appearance before holding your hand and reaching for the door.
“let’s do it” he breathed out.
you sneaked past the security guards and reached the hallway towards the office. you wished you could have collaborated with them, but there was no way you could have known whether the person betraying the president was one of them or not, and you didn’t feel like risking your cover.
your hand reached towards the doorknob, wanting to check whether the door was locked or not. taehyun spoke right before you touched it.
“don’t- it’s dangerous, the bomb could be on the door”
you slowly retracted your hand. you didn’t think this through, and quickly jumped into action. taehyun was right, and you had to find a way to test his theory right before making another attempt at getting in.
you used some of the gadgets irene bought for you, making a small hole inside the wall and pushing through an extendable stick with a camera to look inside.
bingo.
the bomb was placed flushed against the door. had taehyun not stopped you before, you would have both been dead in an instant.
“seems like we’ll have to find another way in” you muttered.
taehyun eyed the outside window “how are your wall climbing skills?”
“not bad at all” you offered to go first, it was probably your best shot for now.
the distance between this window and the one in the office wasn’t that long either, you were just hoping that there weren’t any curious eyes looking up at the building from the garden.
melting away the lock on the window, you succeeded to get in. taehyun followed right after you, jumping inside. the bomb didn’t have a timer on it, the wire connected to the doorknob was what would made it go off. you had to give this one to them, it was pretty smart- this way, they ensured that they had less chances of missing their target.
“any updates?” irene’s voice was heard from your ear piece.
“yeah- we’re in. the enemy’s plan isn’t so bad after all, they just organised it poorly”
“that’s great- but you need to hurry up. you don’t have much time until the guy checking the security cameras alerts the other guards”
“got it” you replied
“so no pressure at all” taehyun laughed as he searched for the necessary tools. the bomb wasn’t unlike anything else you’ve seen before. the only thing you needed to do was follow the procedure carefully, so as not to miss any steps.
taehyun took it upon himself to do it, even though you were both in just as much danger anyway. you helped him out as much as you could, reassuring him that he followed all the steps in the right order and giving him new tools whenever he needed to switch.
“shit-“ you could hear heavy footsteps going up the stairs “they’re onto us, you need to hurry”
“hang on- i’m almost done” taehyun tried his best to remain calm, he couldn’t have his hands trembling at this very moment.
“you either show yourselves, or we’ll have no choice but to barge in” a male voice shouted from behind the door. they were definitely not alone.
“2 more wires” he whispered.
you were growing impatient, but you bit your tongue trying to remain silent, taehyun had to remain concentrated.
“we’ll take your silence as an answer” the man shouted again before starting a countdown.
3, 2, 1-
the door was busted down from its shackles.
the guards remained silent as they were met with...an empty room?
you and taehyun barely managed to make it out on time, and you were now holding your breath as you clung onto the outside wall again. you entered the building through another window from the floor beneath you before they had a chance to inspect the area and potentially see you.
after making sure you were in a safe zone, you reached out to irene again: “we’re done here- we’ll send you that fucker’s fingerprints”
“excellent”
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
taehyun called the reception as you were taking a cab back to the hotel. he requested 2 bottles of wine for you to drink as a form of celebration. you couldn’t wait to lie down and drink to your heart’s content.
so now- here you were, you sitting in taehyun’s lap as he tried his best not to laugh in your face at your drunken words and actions. it seemed like you couldn’t handle alcohol that well when you were exhausted.
“can you kiss me again?” you asked quietly, closing your eyes before you could even notice his reaction. taehyun was taken aback by your sudden proposal, but nevertheless, fondness took over his eyes in an instant. he cupped your cheeks, bringing your face closer to him until your noses were touching. then, he opted for pressing a soft kiss on the corner of your lips, to which you opened your eyes, cheeks burning at the small gesture. “god- you’re making me go crazy” he spoke softly against your lips. his hand took hold of your wrist, leaving a tender kiss on your pulse point “let’s get you to bed”
you shook your head, dipping your head down to bury your face in his chest as you hugged him tightly. silence filled up the room for a moment before you finally spoke again “maybe it was supposed to be like this from the beginning.” your voice was slightly muffled as you refused to move away from your spot. taehyun ran his hands through your hair “…like what?”
“i don’t know. maybe we were never supposed to hate each other" those words rolled off your tongue softly, your eyes getting heavier with each passing second.
taehyun tucked a few strands behind your ear. your words tugged at his heart, and it was like something clicked for the both of you as you voiced out your drunken thoughts. it was stupid-so stupid. all this time, you had both been too caught up in the high created by all the praises and achievements. you were taught to eliminate any kind of obstacle that came your way whenever you set a goal, you forgot to look at each other as just...humans. sure, the pride that bloomed in your chest whenever you successfully cleared yet another mission felt good, but has that ever felt as good as taehyun's touch? his lips on yours, rough hands enveloping yours as a silent sign of care and reassurance, arms circling your waist to keep you close, to keep you safe. you never paid much attention to human relationships, and perhaps that was the reason why, once you stepped foot into your empty apartment, once the cheers died down, you had never felt truly satisfied with your life.
hearing the sound of light snores coming from beneath him, taehyun looked down to find you already fast asleep in his lap. “cute” he chuckled, secretly taking out his phone for a pic, the corners of his mouth turning up at the thought of teasing you about it tomorrow. he slowly detangled your hand that was holding on to his shirt tightly, then lifted you up to carry you over to your side of the bed. he frowned upon noticing that you never had the chance to take off your dress. diverting his eyes as much as he could, taehyun took it off for you, blushing as he slid one of his shirts over your head. he didn't want to invade your privacy, he just wished you could rest comfortably after experiencing such a draining day.
“sleep well, y/n” taehyun pressed a kiss against your temple before getting underneath the covers himself. he sighed in contentment as he brought himself closer to you, your soft rhythmic breaths and warm body putting his own at ease.
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taglist: @huekalover3000
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you know i adore you (3)
TEEN!gojo x FEM!reader (soulmate AU)
TW⚠️: gojo's being a little manipulative, angst, mentions of death and blood, mostly fluff tho
1: what you see, i see
2: where you go, i go
A/N: gojo is so 1989 coded
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Her phone had buzzed for the tenth time during her student council meeting, and for the tenth time, she ignored it. She didn't have to look at the caller ID to know who it was.
Who knew Gojo Satoru would be so clingy? And here she thought she would be the one hanging on his coat tails. Not that they were dating because they weren't. They were friends with emphasis on friends - she had decided that after the high of finally seeing each other face to face.
The morning after was very clarifying for her. She tried to remember her dream the night, only to realize that Satoru had not slept the entire night - he had been watching her sleep the entire night. It was especially clarifying when her mom knocked on her door, and she processed that not only did she have a strange boy in her room, but that he was also soaked in blood. A hectic morning of her hiding her soulmate in the bathroom. It didn't help that he was complaining the entire time - it was a miracle her mother didn't hear him.
Fact of the matter is it would be irresponsible for her to start seeing him romantically without actually getting to know him first and she was a responsible person. So responsible that for the time being, she had to put student council duties first over her friendship with him, especially with the festival coming up.
She would call him after the meeting was over, "Now, do we have everything prepared for the festival tomorrow?"
Everyone nodded as they checked classrooms, and fixed decoration, and they put up the banner outside of the school that would be welcoming everyone in. After this task was done, she would leave.
From atop a ladder, she tied the elastic ribbons into a bow and smoothed the banner over with her hand, "Everything alright on that side?"
Her peer smiled at her from the other ladder directly on the other side of the banner, "Yeah!"
She climbed down the ladder and looked at their handiwork. It was perfect. All that was left was to go get her things.
One of her classmates giggled besides her, "Your boyfriend's here again."
"Who's boyfriend?" She asked.
The girl pointed at the entrance of the school, "Yours." She smiled cheerfully at him, "Hi, Gojo!"
And there he was, walking over to them - pouting.
This was her fault she should've known he would show up if didn't at least answer one of his calls or texts.
"We've been over this." She said, "He is not my boyfriend."
"Does he know that?" The girl said.
Another classmate chimed in, "Why not? he's super cute."
She hoped Satoru hadn't heard that. His ego was big enough as it was.
A pair of strong arms wrapped around her waist as he nuzzled his head in her neck, he said, "Yeah, I am super cute. Why not?"
Of course, he heard them. He looked at her expectantly over his glasses. He really was adorable when he wanted to be, enough that all of her classmates (boys and girls alike) practically swoon for him when he does anything.
She ignored him, "Meetings over. Everyone, go home."
Satoru huffed in annoyance but didn't let go of her, "Why don't you answer your phone?" He tilted his head so she could see more of his vibrant blue eyes despite his glasses, "A text would've been enough."
She fought the urge to run her hands through his hair, "I told you I had a student council meeting today." She twisted in his arms to face him, "and I told you that I wasn't going to be able to call or text until after."
He buried his face in her neck again and groaned, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, you did."
This was a little more than friendly, she knew that, but she also learned at the beginning of their friendship that he also didn't know what personal space was. Besides, she would stop him before he got too far, but she would admit, she liked it when he daringly pressed his lips on her neck to test just how far he can push the boundaries she had set for them. But today, she would enforce them.
She tugged his head back from her neck, "I have to go get my school bag, Satoru."
She stilled as he leaned in and kissed her in the corner of her mouth. Another thing he did to see how far he could go.
She pursed her lips, "That's more than friendly."
He raised an eyebrow, "You mind today?" And let out a dramatic sigh, "it's cause people are watching, isn't it?" He shifted all of his weight on her, "I'm a dirty little secret!"
She finally hugged him back. Not to actually hug him but keep them from toppling over.
She heard footsteps and giggles as her classmates walked past her and Satoru, "Yeah, he's totally not your boyfriend."
She saw a glimpse of Satoru's cheeky smile before he stuck his lower lip out and rubbed his cheek against hers.
And like clockwork, "Aw~"
She glared at her peers, "Do not encourage his behaviour."
They all snickered as they left.
She rolled her eyes at them and grabbed Satoru's cheeks with one hand forcing his lips to pucker as they looked at each other, "Stop." She pushed him off of her and finally, went to go get her belongings.
She sighed when Satoru slipped his hand in hers. If she pulled away he would whine for the rest of the day, so she let their fingers intertwine.
His eyes wandered away from her from time to time. She closed her eyes for a second. Little spectres were staring at them, peeking their heads from their hiding spots, and whenever, Satoru directed his gaze at them they'd duck back into their hiding spots in fear.
Oh.
She opened her eyes and quickened her steps. Her soulmate kept up with her new pace with ease. She opened the door and quickly picked up her school bag, but Satoru took it from her hand before she could sling it around her shoulder and swung it over his instead.
"Those curses shouldn't scare you. You know, they're too scared to come out and hurt anyone," he said, "They're too weak."
She grabbed her phone from the table, "You know I can't see them the way you can."
He pressed a kiss on her temple, "I can handle them, no problem."
She rested her head on his arm. He was right if any curse dared to rear out their ugly heads against them he would excorcise it easily. She was safe. They were safe.
She flipped her phone open as they walked out of the school.
47 MISSED CALLS from Gojo Satoru
He was not serious.
83 TEXT MESSAGES from Gojo Satoru
Oh God.
2 TEXT MESSAGES from Geto Suguru
Geto.S: He's being insufferable
Geto.S: Answer so he'll stop whining to me and Shoko
She shoved her phone in his face, "For real?!"
"You weren't answering!"
She shook her head as she went through the text messages.
Gojo.S: Wanna go check out the new boba place <3
Gojo.S: Whatcha ya doing? :3
Gojo.S: Oh right student council
Gojo.S: How long is it gonna to take?
Gojo.S: it's been 30 minutes :(
Gojo.S: Pls answer the phone </3
Gojo.S: meeting boring
Gojo.S: Ditch :D
She skimmed the rest of texts until she got near the end.
Gojo.S: The decorations look great!! :b
Gojo.S: r ya seriously going to check every classroom?
Gojo.S: For real?????
Gojo.S: ______ <3
Gojo.S: Suguru punched me :(
Gojo.S: kiss it better pls
Gojo.S: How much longer?????
Gojo.S: A ladder for what???
Gojo.S: :'(((((((((
Gojo.S: <////////////3
Gojo.S: I'm heading over there
She flipped her phone close, "You are such a stalker, Satoru."
He gasped offendedly, "I am not."
"Yes, you are."
"Am not!"
"Really?" She said, "What about the time you were literally watching me sleep for hours?"
"I wasn't myself that day." He quickly added, "and you were sad all day! What kind of soulmate would I be if I didn't let you know I was okay?"
"How'd you know where I live?" She retorted.
"It's a cute little bakery!" He smiled, "how is anyone supposed to miss that."
"Uh huh," she hummed, "suuureee~"
She was right, Satoru had somewhat stalked her that day and with how empowered he felt - he tracked down the very little cursed energy she did have with his six eyes.
"You stalk me too!" He pushed back.
"Hardly."
She was lying, but there was a difference between his stalking and her stalking. She only wanted to make sure he was safe. After what happened a few months ago, she couldn't help it and she only stalked him when he goes on missions not for everyday things like he does.
"Liar," Satoru said, "I can tell. I have really good eyes and senses."
She blushed, "It is not the same." Stupid six eyes, "You stalk me for no reason."
"It's not for 'no reason' - I miss you." He readjusted the straps of her school bag on his shoulder, "Besides, you don't have to worry about me like that anymore. No one can get the jump on me like that again."
She knew what he meant: I'm stronger now. Don't worry, I'm not dying anytime soon, and he was right. Nothing could touch him anymore unless he wanted it to, even her. Still, he didn't know what it felt like to have him gone from her soul. It wasn't a fading feeling of him slipping away - No, it was violent and soul wrenching - he was viscerally ripped from her. She was left cold and alone with her heart being the only one left beating. She was with him the whole time when he was desperately trying to learn and understand reverse curse technique to heal his bloody and dying body. All Satoru knew was that she cried.
Soft lips pressed against her cheek and then to the other. It was so sweet, so wonderful she hadn't realized she was crying.
"Is that why we aren't dating yet?" He continued to kiss her tears away, "you scared?"
She hadn't cared for him then and she fell apart. Imagine the damage it would do to her if she was in love with him? Her lip quivered at the thought. With a shaky breath, she buried herself in his chest in a hug, and nodded.
Satoru soothingly ran his long, slender fingers through her hair, "My girl's a bit of a little cry baby, ain't she?"
Her heart fluttered, my girl.
"I have every right to cry," she mumbled stubbornly in his chest.
He kissed the top of her head, "Yeah, you do." He tilted her chin up so she would look at him, "Boyfriends give more kisses you know."
She smiled as she wiped her tears, "No fair, I'm emotionally vulnerable right now."
Satoru's lips pressed ever so softly on hers. It was barely even a kiss, but she melted in his arms all the same. It would be so easy to fall into him and he would catch her every time. Yet, he pulled away and rested his forehead against hers.
She was right. He shouldn't take advantage.
He sighed... if time was what she needed then he could wait a little longer.
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Part 4: i'm crazier for you
Gojo: y'all be scared to double text? Not me! Ding ding ding it's me again bitch!
Part 5: baby, you're the life of the party
Part 6: something's made your eyes go cold
Let me know if you wanna be tagged!
@phoenix666stuff @96jnie @mr-underhills-things @whatamidoing89
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shutupineedtothink · 6 months
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I’m still s h o o k that people do not see exactly what’s going on with Moiraine throughout s2 and people are dragging her and dismissing her without an ounce of empathy for what she’s been through, so I’m bringing the full character analysis for y’all (and my own sanity). So this is a big ol in defense of Moiraine (and Lan) rant, so if that’s not your thing, scroll down now. Here we go.
I just… The AUDACITY some people have to look at Moiraine and be angry and pissed off at how she acts in S2. To not feel any sympathy and empathy for her and the monumental weight she’s under every goddamn day. There’s a reason we start with that bath scene in 2x01 – it shows you everything. How she’s just going through the motions. How she only lets herself cry when she’s alone in the water. How she literally curls into the fetal position and looks reproachfully devastated over her knees as she hugs them to her chest in a futile attempt at comfort. Not to mention the direct comparison/callback with the bath scene in 1x01, where she has both her power and Lan still, and now she’s lost her connection to both of them.
How is it not painfully obvious that every interaction she has after that bath scene is infused with a trauma response? Let’s tally up the devastation she’s been through. At the end of S1, she was 1. banished from the sisterhood of the white tower (they literally turned their backs on her), 2. was separated AGAIN from the love of her life fully expecting to never see her again, 3. was cut off from the other love of her life (that would be Lan, for the record) which is all the worse bc it’s her own fault for masking the bond, 4. was fully made to believe she’s been stilled from the one power aka an integral part of her being, AND 5. she’s “failed” her mission at the eye of the world – the one goal she’s had for the last 20 years, her life’s purpose – because instead of locking away the dark one she’s directly caused Rand to set Ishamael free.
You don’t think it's justified to be a little pissed off and standoffish after all of that? You don’t think the weight of that guilt, grief, pain, and loss is a reasonable cause to be distant, cold, harsh, having a little bit of a death wish? That’s TRAUMA, baby! She is absolutely wrecked, and it’s coming out in the worst way in her interactions with others (especially Lan because we’ve seen how they should be), but it’s absolutely not because she actively wants to hurt the people around her. In fact after almost every moment she lashes out at someone, we see an equally sad/grief-stricken/devastated moment from her and THAT’S the real emotion hiding underneath the anger. This woman needs therapy and understanding and patience, and does not deserve to be judged at the worst time of her life.
Ok fine, you say, but Lan IS patient and understanding with her! And she’s still an asshole to him! You’re right, Lan is absolutely trying his best and doing just about everything he can to be there for her in 2x01/2x02 (with a little help from Verin and Tomas). But 1. It’s STILL not about him, Moiraine is not obligated to respond in a certain way to her grief and pain that makes him feel better, and 2. This is Moiraine goddamn Damodred and even her trauma response is also a front to protect him, to push him away from her and what is now certainly a suicide mission to fight the dark without her powers.
This is SOOO important to really get Moiraine’s character — y’all gotta understand this: Moiraine truly loves only TWO people on the whole fucking planet: Siuan and Lan. They are also the only people who truly love her, unconditionally, with all of her flaws and imperfections. Please please ingrain that into your brain, especially for Lan, in this context. (Siuan is a whole other conversation I won’t get into at the moment.) Moiraine loves Lan, he loves her, deeply. That’s the foundation of everything they go through with each other in this season, despite what’s happening on the surface.
Once you accept that as fundamental truth, everything makes a whole lot more sense. She is a dick to him to push him away. Literally tells him he failed her to put the final nail in the coffin of driving him away, which is his worst nightmare. On the surface it seems egotistic at best, plain cruel at worst. But look underneath. Moiraine always has reasons 2, 3, 6 layers deep for everything she does.
With everyone else she’s mean to this season, namely her sister and her nephew, it’s born out of distrust (and the aforementioned trauma response). She can’t afford to trust anyone because anyone could be a dark friend. (And if they’re not a dark friend, then they become a liability and endangered.) Anything she lets slip could be used to hurt/control Rand and push them all one step closer to eternal darkness. Oh and when we see Barthanes’ true nature that turns out to be fucking justified, by the way. But I digress.
Right so why is she an asshole to Lan then? Because she doesn’t trust him? I don’t believe that for a second. These two have been on the same page, literally sharing the same headspace, for the last 20 years – she knows he’s the best person she’s ever met, the least likely to ever turn to the dark, ever. It’s an actual impossibility. So it’s not that she doesn’t trust him. She literally marvels at how courageous he must be to fight the dark with only a sword.
The true reason is: she does trust him, she does love him, and she KNOWS him. She knows that he will never leave her like this, in her darkest hour. He is both honor-bound to her (which he takes very seriously) and deeply cares for her. The problem is that now his life is in serious danger by staying with her. But there is no calmly explaining to him that he should return to the white tower for his own good and bond to another aes sedai who can actually channel, who can actually hold up her end of the partnership and protect him and heal him in return for his loyalty and sacrifice. Or better yet, find Nynaeve, who is not only ridiculously powerful and has probably the best chance of protecting him out of anyone, but who also loves him.
If Moiraine loves him and wants him safe, the ONLY option she has to protect him, the one good thing left in her life even if their bond is masked, is to drive him away. To make it so that he’ll stay far away from her of his own free will, and never come after her and her suicide mission to defeat the dark. Because she has already lost everything, she has no control over her fate anymore (if she ever had any to begin with), but the ONE thing she can still try to do is keep him safe. And hopefully, maybe he’ll be happy, one day. Her reasoning is directly confirmed for us in the last thing she says to him in 2x02 before she leaves: “Light protect you, al’Lan Mandragoran.” That was her goal all along, to protect him.
That’s the true reason she’s Like That to him. It’s all out of her love for him, and a desperate desire not to drag him down with her when she’s sure she’s destined to die on this mission. Is her strategy misguided? On the one hand yes, because she does need people to help her and she needs to trust someone, as he points out. On the other hand, she’s absolutely fucking right because look what happened with the Fade fight at the end of 2x01. Both her and Lan would have died without Verin and Tomas, and it would have been because she couldn’t channel. He is factually, logically, physically better off without her as long as she’s “stilled.”
This is why it makes sense how Lan eventually responds the way he does. He initially sees right through what she’s trying to do, he literally says he won’t let her push him away. He knows her too, better than anyone, including Siuan at this point. But he isn’t expecting her to go as far as she does, and it shakes him to his core. She tells him he failed her, has his worst fears confirmed, and then hears the words “we were never equals” and hears that she thinks she’s better than him, when she means the exact opposite. Tomas tells him to really listen but he can’t, in that moment.
But then he gets some distance, and some perspective thanks to Ihvon and Maksim, and he remembers: he loves her. He believes in her and he knows her and he knows what she’s doing to push him away (although maybe not why, when it comes to protecting him, because he doesn’t see himself as someone who needs protecting). Even better, he realizes that her situation is actually not what she thinks, that she’s shielded not stilled, and he can do something about that.
I LOVE Lan in 2x07 because he’s got Moiraine’s number now, and he will not be swayed by any further attempts (rather weak attempts at this point) to lash out at him. He just takes all the shit she throws at him, and calmly asks her what he needs to know and tells her what she needs to hear (“hopefully everything we’ve lost” and “that’s what I thought” and “you need to trust someone, Moiraine”), and is truthful with her even if she is still putting on this act with him in her fear and grief. He isn’t having any of it, he sees straight through it to the fear and pain underneath. And he literally DECIDES they are going to be okay, and then he fucking. Follows. Through.
He is not a doormat to her rage, he is not her servant, he’s not going back to her with his tail between his legs. He SHOWS UP for her in her darkest hour, when NO ONE, not even Siuan, can see what’s going on with her. That’s a true friend, a true hero, and absolute king behavior.
In conclusion, Moiraine’s behavior in s2, while not cute, is totally justified given the trauma, circumstances and everything she’s dealing with (jfc the lack of sleep alone) and makes sense in light of her ultimate goal to protect the world, which includes protecting Lan. And Lan’s response, once he figures out what to do, is the absolute correct way to handle the situation and is not weakness at all but strength in the highest order.
I’m so glad we got the payoff of all that with their conversation in 2x08 and reconnecting the bond. It was so beautiful, so earned, and reminded us of the level they’re on with each other — which is a soul connection way beyond what any of us can imagine.
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wen-kexing-apologist · 7 months
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Poor Boy
Alright so, apparently the rule for me is going to be that I have to watch every Only Friends episode multiple times. Because the first watch through is just vibes and pure, unadulterated emotional reactions to whatever is being laid in front of me; and the second watch through I have to keep pausing the show every thirty seconds to make another observation.
I don’t know what it is about Episode 4s but they are always where everything starts kicking in to high gear for me. Now, not sure how many more academic papers I am going to be able to write for the bit for this show, but there are so many things about body language, about hands, about relationship dynamics, about drug use, etc that are swarming in my head at this point. 
In constantly talking some other tumblr users ears off about this show, @lurkingshan tasked me with writing a post about Only Friend’s seventh main character.
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The POOR BOY shirt. 
Why? Because god are there already some juicy literal and metaphorical character dynamics at play with this shirt, (at least in my perception) and I have been commanded to discuss them, and if you have not realized it by now I love discussing my silly little gay shows. 
What is initially and primarily intriguing to me is the fact that the Poor Boy shirt ends up making rounds in the show. Sand gives the shirt to Ray → Ray keeps the shirt rather than returning it to Sand → Ray gives the shirt to Mew. 
To each of these characters, the shirt means something different, not only from a place of sentimentality, but from a literal, textual meaning. 
Sand
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Sadly, we have not yet seen Sand wear the Poor Boy t-shirt, but he is the original owner. From my view, Sand’s relationship to the t-shirt is fairly simple. It is a literal translation of Sand’s own economic status. Sand is poor, and the Poor Boy t-shirt speaks directly towards his everyday reality. 
Sand’s decision to put Ray in this shirt feels petty. Sand is very aware that Ray is rich. (I mean, his first words to Ray when they wake up the next morning are “you’re up, rich boy?”) Now, obviously we cannot peer in to Sand’s mind about the fashion choices he is making, but the entertainment value of seeing this rich boy in a poor boy shirt was there. In this capacity, the Poor Boy shirt serves as a physical manifestation of the wealth disparity between Sand and Ray. Sand owning that shirt is a literal statement, Ray wearing that shirt is hilariously ironic. 
Or is it? 
Ray
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We know (or at least can suspect) that Ray has some sort of alcohol dependence from the very first moment we meet him, based on his ascribed role as The Drunk. On the off chance the initial reaction was not “oh this kid is an alcoholic” the narrative continues to build that aspect of Ray’s character when his second trip to the bar also results in him getting plastered, and when he drinks from a flask in the middle of the day, and when he is constantly seen on screen with a whiskey glass in his hand. 
Now, I will not say that everyone who is an alcoholic drinks as a trauma response, but I will say that there are many people who use substances to cope with life stressors. So, when I see Ray with alcohol constantly, that is an indication to me that there is maybe something more beneath the surface of his party boy aura. 
We learn in Episode 2 that Ray’s mother died and he was present for her death (#trauma). [In case you didn’t notice, Ray’s mother died with an empty glass in her hand and empty liquor bottle at her side.]
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Sand jokingly calls Ray out on his motivation for paying Sand to hang out with him: “Now I know. You’re a lonely spoiled rich brat. Your friends left you because they have lovers. That’s why you need a new friend. Your life is dramatic. Poor you.” 
Sand says it teasingly, with a smile on his face. But Ray? Ray turns his back to Sand, takes a long pull from his glass, and heads over to the record player.
Perhaps you know where I am going with this already, but I want to just take a second to review the order of events by which I am going to make my final conclusions about this shirt in relation to Ray. 
Episode 1
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Ray is introduced piss drunk and hanging on to the edge of the toilet for dear life, he is quick to anger, he gets drunk at the bar again, he tries to drive home, Sand drives him back to his apartment, he wakes up in the Poor Boy shirt, he gets kicked out of Sand’s apartment for being a #rudeboy, Ray calls Mew, Mew wonders how he got to Sand’s place when Boston said he would take care of Ray. In short, Ray gets extremely drunk, is abandoned by all of his friends, taken home by Sand and as a result is adorned with the Poor Boy t-shirt. 
Episode 2 
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Our first Ray sighting in Episode 2 he is sitting outside drinking a nip, alone. No one inside the hostel even questions where he is. Mew is the one that goes outside to check on him, calls out his drinking habits, and tells Ray “I can’t be your emergency staff all the time”. Ray sees Sand selling something on campus and follows him around. He breaks Sand’s plum wine bottles and then offers him 10,000 bhat to just hang out, drink, and listen to music. Sand learns about Ray’s dead mother. Ray goes wakeboarding with the rest of the college pals, Ray tries to help Cheum, makes her ankle hurt worse, and literally the only person that talks to him besides to tell him to stop (Chuem) and to question his ability to help (Top) (aka the only person who engages in casual conversation with Ray) is Mew. Ray has his second hang out with Sand, Sand calls out the fact that Ray’s friends have abandoned him because they all have lovers, he says he will be friends with Ray, and Ray and Sand fuck. 
Episode 3
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Episode 3, Ray clings to Sand the morning after, offers to drive him to school, volunteers to handle the music for the pool party (much to the surprise of all of his friends). Ray then spends most of the rest of his screen time either flirting with Sand or simping over Mew. Top belittles Ray, Boston calls out Ray’s crush on Mew and calls Ray’s life dramatic, Ray is left alone at the party and runs in to Sand, offers to take Sand home, starts making out with Sand, and then interrupts the guaranteed dicking down that he just convinced Sand to make an exception for when he pulls himself fully and instantly out of that make out session to answer Mew’s call, pissing off Sand. 
Episode 4
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Episode 4 opens with (yet another) show stopping performance by Khaotung (seriously this dude is a powerhouse) where we learn that Ray was at one point actively suicidal and made an attempt. We learn in a very short period of time there that Ray does not have a lover, a sibling, or family that he feels like he can rely on. Mew is his emergency contact because he is the only person who is consistently taking care of Ray. On the phone with Mew, Ray says “If I’m gone, I won’t be anyone’s burden anymore, right?” When Ray breaks down sobbing as Mew holds him, Ray says “No one loves me. I’m all alone. Everyone hates me. My mom never loved me. Her life was ruined because of me. She died because of me. She never hugged me like this, you know? I’m bad luck, Mew. No one loves me!” and it is at this point that we can look back at all these other interactions Ray has had over the three prior episodes and see that two years after his suicide attempt, he is still being called a burden by friends and strangers, he is still alone.
[As an aside: I want to make it extremely clear that there is a lot of juicy complexity to Ray’s dynamic with his friend group. I am not saying that his friends are inherently bad people for the distance they place between themselves and Ray. First, they are college students, second Ray has a lot of mental health and addiction things going on that they are not equipped to handle, and having to constantly manage a friend with an addiction, especially one that can make them escalate situations really quickly (see Ray ready to fight Sand in the bathroom within like, thirty seconds of talking) is challenging. But I am also not going to absolve them entirely of the kind of statements they make about Ray, when they don’t return his ‘i love yous’ when he’s drunk and when they call him a burden, because these are things that were such a strong part of his belief system that they are part of the driving thoughts he verbalizes when he tries to kill himself.]
While it took us fully four episodes to get there, we find that the Poor Boy t-shirt that Ray wakes up wearing in Episode 1, while inaccurate for his literal financial reality, is incredibly, aggressively precise and accurate to Ray’s emotional reality. 
Mew
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Cutting back to present day in Episode 4, Mew has been picked up by Ray and brought over to his house to spend the night. Ray’s first action in the scene is to turn to the coat rack he has in his room, pull a white shirt from it, and hand it to Mew to change in to for pajamas. Ray asks Mew why Top didn’t pick him up and Mew states that he did in fact call, but Top was busy fucking Boston helping his dad at the hotel. Ray makes a comment about being a substitute and feeling forgotten when Mew is with Top, Mew tells Ray that he is his most beloved friend, and then he looks at the shirt, turns it around to show Ray and asks:
“Is this yours?”
Now, I assume Ray is aware of what shirt he gave Mew to wear, but there is something disconnected in what I am reading from Ray’s reaction to seeing Mew hold up the shirt. 
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To me it seems a bit like Ray is...not surprised, but perhaps uncertain? He knows that shirt is Sand’s but he has spent all this time at the party trying to convince Mew that he isn’t interested in Sand, that there is no attraction between them, because Ray is still hung up on Mew and some part of him is hoping there is a chance. Ray lets Mew tease him “Poor boy, seriously? How dare you wear this?”
Ray remains quiet, until Mew once again presses Ray about getting together with Sand.
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 “Why don’t you hit on Sand? I think he’s lovely” (preface- I do not know Thai, but I do know that ‘narak’ typically means cute. Mew definitely says ‘narak’ when he refers to Sand, but it is translated as lovely so the caption may not be completely accurate). “I want you to have a boyfriend. Dating a musician is freaking cool.”
Now, there are a couple things I see at play in this moment. First, I am pretty certain that Mew is still very much aware of Ray’s crush on him. I think the casual comments Mew makes about Top being the first person to make his heart tremble and how heavily he is pushing Ray to ask Sand out or even to just try to figure out if Ray does genuinely have interest in Sand are ways for Mew to kindly, gently remind Ray that he does not reciprocate any romantic feelings. 
Secondly, Mew is and will be commenting on traits that apply to either himself or adjacently to Ray. When Mew says dating a musician is freaking cool, we know he is referring to Sand who is actually a musician. But for Ray, who is desperately in love with Mew, is it too far of a stretch for Ray to believe that Mew’s sentiment may also apply to people with really strong tastes and interests in music?
Third, Boston has stirred up some resolve in Ray from the party, trying to convince him that he needs to tell Mew that he is interested, to even have a fighting chance at maybe getting Mew to date him. So he lies: 
“No. I don’t want to be in a relationship just yet. Besides, Sand isn’t my type.” 
Something I absolutely love about Only Friends so far is that no one is telling the truth 100% of the time, but also no one is lying 100% of the time and we don’t yet know enough about most of the characters here to be completely certain which parts they are being truthful about. Nick is lying to Boston, or at least keeping secrets from him (he did not tell Boston he bugged the car), but he will fully, easily, and readily admit to Sand that he bugged the car and recorded Boston and Top having sex. He will fully, easily, and readily admit that he is nasty and also that he isn’t trying to blackmail Top. Top will omit the information that he slept with Boston, but he will admit to drug use and pull a baggie of coke out of his pocket to show Mew. Some of my mutuals are still in debates around how much Top is lying, including whether or not he is telling the truth about the fire he was in as a child, etc. 
In this case for this scene with Mew, we know Ray is lying about not wanting to be in a relationship. He does want to be in a relationship…with Mew. But is he lying about Sand not being his type? It would certainly track, considering Ray was the one that initiated the sexual relationship between them and continued to pursue it. Yet at the same time, Ray is stopping in the middle of a make out session, disregarding Sand’s feelings entirely, and taking Mew’s call. And Sand’s lack of wealth is something Ray has exploited or tried to exploit on multiple occasions. (Which is in part why it is very important to recognize the second Sand realizes he may actually be enjoying Ray’s company, that he rejects all offers of money from Ray).
As Mew continues to talk, he continues to state advice that could apply to himself: “Don’t set your standards too high.” Ray is a drunken mess of a college boy, and if Mew is telling him not to set his standards too high, wouldn’t it also be possible that Mew could see Ray as a lower standard and still decide to date him? 
“Just date someone who loves you and takes care of you.” Mew is the only person that really seems to take care of Ray at this point. Boston abandoned him, Cheum doesn’t really interact with him all that much, Top hates him, etc. When Ray attempted suicide Mew said he loved him, when Ray attempted suicide Mew said he would always be there for him. Mew has supported Ray for so long, Mew has taken care of Ray for so long. And now Mew is casually naming the qualities of his good friendship to Ray as a recommendation of how to find someone to date. 
So to me, it makes total sense that Ray would try to kiss Mew and admit his feelings. 
But why is the Poor Boy shirt relevant to Mew? 
Because there is someone else we have seen take care of Ray multiple times already…
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Sand. 
The OPB (original poor boy). 
Sand says he can differentiate between love and lust, but the ease at which he relents to Ray’s puppy dog eyes, the speed by which is is made upset at being abandoned by Ray, the safeguards he has in place that he is constantly undermining, we know that if Sand is not already in love with Ray he will be getting there fast.
In my opinion, the Poor Boy shirt acts not as any form of physical or emotional commentary for Mew’s state specifically, but serves instead as Ray subconsciously projecting Sand on to Mew. Despite how quickly and strongly Ray has been drawn towards Sand in recent episodes, despite the good vibes, and good sex they’ve had going on, despite their mutual attraction to one another and some matching interests, Ray has given this reminder of the first care Sand provided (despite throwing him out after Ray gave him an attitude) to Mew. And it’s not like Ray hasn’t had the opportunity to give Sand back his t-shirt. Ray and Sand have hung out there at least twice and fucked each other in Ray’s bedroom. But Ray hung on to the shirt, why? 
Sand’s shirt on Mew’s body is misplaced, either as a subconscious acknowledgement of his growing interest in Sand or as a way for Ray to physically place reminders of the care and attention Sand has been giving him on to Mew, who Ray is still crushing on, even as Mew has slowly started to pry himself away from the responsibility of taking care of Ray.
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And as we approach the end of Episode 4, we see Ray start to realign his expectations, settling in to the reality that Mew has not, does not, and never will like him romantically. We are introduced for the first time, to a physical, tangible object that Ray owns that is connected to Mew and to Ray’s relationship with Mew as a result. Ray sits in the tub, the same tub he tried to die in two years ago, the same tub Mew held him in two years ago and told him he loved him and promised to always be there for him.
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Ray thinks about what this pendant symbolizes, the words Mew told him when he gifted it to Ray: “You are the brightness, you are a ray of sunshine. You should be hot and lively.” Ray says at the beginning that his friends hate him, that he is all alone. So I don’t think it is a far stretch of the imagination by any means to say that Mew may be one of the first if not the first person in years to make Ray feel like he was loved, valued, supported, and understood. 
And it is not surprising as a result of that that Ray would fall in love with Mew, especially if Ray’s addiction has been ongoing for years and he has been a difficult person to maintain friendship with. 
Ray has crossed boundaries and suffered immediate consequences as a result, but those consequences included finally hearing directly from Mew that his feelings have not changed over the last two years. Ray is drunk 99.9% of the time, that doesn’t mean he’s blacked out by any means, but it does mean that frequently his judgment is going to be inhibited. It is highly likely, in my eyes, that Ray needed the direct admission rather than Mew’s gentle rejections over the last two years. 
With Mew finally voicing his regard of Ray as only a friend, Ray is now able to re-evaluate the advice Mew gave to Ray at the beginning of the episode, and consider who else (besides Mew himself) Mew’s statements might apply to. The answer, of course, was staring him in the face the entire time. With the Poor Boy shirt removed from Mew’s back, Ray is forced to understand the shirt more as a physical tie to Sand, like the keychain is a physical tie to Mew. 
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(hehe this angle makes it look like it says Poo Boy or Poop Boy) 
Ray looks at the shirt and thinks back to the record shop not-a-date with Sand, the honesty Sand had with him, the ease at which Sand shared information about himself, his interests, the gentleness with which Sand treated Ray, even just placing the headphone on him. Ray thinks of the song they listened to together, titled เรา which translates to “we” and he makes his choice. 
Looking forward: I am curious if this shirt will continue to make its rounds, with Top having recently fucked Boston, there is also a total possibility that Mew is being branded as the Next Poor Boy whose life will fall apart as truths are revealed and consequences enacted. 
Thank you to @lurkingshan for edits and observations!
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thatone-highlighter · 6 months
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I wonder if fionna and cake in the upcoming episodes is going to follow up on the fact that Simon, Fionna and Cake are all directly responsible for at least one death in every universe they visited. Like not even as an unintended consequence but directly responsible for at least one per universe.
In the original Ooo both Fionna and Cake assault a lot of people and kill at least that hot dog knight
Farmworld Finn died to the Scarab trying to protect them
Fionna out right killed all those candy people as well as Winter King accidentally
They removed baby finn from the babyworld and left him with no one left alive to care for him in a world populated by vampires
Martin died joining fionna in her attempt to help people to fight her guilt
BMO dies as the last remaining life form besides the lich because they try to charge Prismo‘s remote for them
And after each and every time this happens, they just up and leave the universe and move on to the next as if nothing happened. All of them, even Simon, treat all these other universes like they’re fake and don’t matter as much as their original universes. They dont care what happens to any of these places because theyre not sticking around long enough to see the consequences of their actions. But there are consequences. in some cases they have irreparably altered the universes from what they were before Simon, Fionna and Cake came through them. That hot dog knight is dead now. Farmworld Finn‘s kids don‘t have a parent anymore. Wether you argue removing the Winter King is a net positive or not they also killed all those candy people and drastically altered that universes timeline for better or worse. Baby Finn has been at best permanently displaced from his original universe where he would have been safe, or at worst dead to the elements or vampires or starvation shortly after the episode cuts. And BMO, the lone survivor in post 2nd apocalypse Ooo, is gone forever, leaving the world inhabited by nothing but the Lich.
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singingcicadas · 18 days
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Rodimus and making Necessary Sacrifices
The most famous one: blowing up Nyon
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Btw Megatron could totally have saved the people in Nyon if he wanted to; he knew about Zeta's plan beforehand. All he needed to do was give Hot Rod and the citizens an evacuation alert. But he didn't because he wanted to give Optimus a good emotional impact with all the deaths and who cares about the common lowlife anyway, all they're good for is getting bodily thrown at Zeta until his weapon overloads from draining too many people.
Kimia station in Chaos Theory:
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Red text bubble is Optimus. He doesn't wait for Optimus to agree before directly giving Omega Supreme orders to shoot Kimia down.
Reaction after confirming that Doubledealer is a traitor:
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Using Rung as bait for the sparkeater:
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The last two panels also gives us something on how he views (his own) authority. Because while he's always held a position of authority in high command, the high command is still a council. On the ship his authority is absolute.
The next three scenarios form a pattern. It always starts with Rodimus telling someone to kill a comrade, the person tasked with the killing goes 'what I don't want to do that', and Rodimus tones down the order from death to wound.
Ordering Rewind and Swerve to shoot at Fort Max:
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Ordering Swerve to hurt Ore:
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Ordering Cyclonus to shoot Brainstorm:
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Each of these scenarios is in response to a critical situation. Rodimus' first orders of 'aim to kill' are, while extreme, not disproportionate to the level of threat presented. They're within reason and authority. And ceding from kill to wound when protested is proof that he doesn't not care. But it also shows that his first instinctual reaction towards threats is to kill first ask questions later, even if the threat used to be his friend, comrade, or compatriot, he's able to weigh the lives on a scale and make that hard decision. He's also the type of person who's very comfortable with taking the fates other people into his own hands and deciding whether they should live or die (which is why him choosing to spare Getaway after retaking the Lost Light is a sign of character growth).
His characterization is fairly consistent throughout the comics, except for this:
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Everything in Spotlight Hot Rod goes against his later presentations. In his spotlight he's said to repeatedly beat himself up over one failed mission and is averse to taking responsibility towards other people for fear that he'd get them killed but in later issues he has No Problems doing exactly that. He displays no preferences for 'going solo' aside from the mission to retrieve the matrix and that's because everyone else kicked him out. When he wanted to leave on the Lost Light he made speeches to convince other people to join him despite the fact the Autobots were already outnumbered on Cybertron and taking people away would make their situation worse. Whenever he went anywhere in mtmte he assembled a team to accompany him.
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This scene especially contradicts Spotlight Hot Rod in every single way. The only consistent aspect of his character is the recklessness. He forces Optimus to authorize a rescue mission, of which he declares himself the team leader, ignores Optimus' caution about keeping it clandestine and tells everyone to barge through the front door, shuts Ironhide's objections down by pulling rank, then falls into a trap and gets Ironhide killed. Mission failed too obviously, they only got Prowl out. Optimus takes responsibility for the failure and surrenders to the humans, of which Rodimus' response is: "he freaked out because he couldn't hack it" and promptly also proceeds to drop everything and leave because yay there's no one to keep me on this stupid planet anymore and whoever wants to can come with. Where. is the guilt.
That and the whole fiasco with Swindle and Menasor were probably Rodimus' worst moments lol. Overall he's the type of leader good with stressful trolley problems but bad at considering the larger or long-term implications of his actions. His flippancy towards life and death and tendency to solve problems with the bluntest approach bleeds heavily into his leadership decisions and... just how his character is in general. Thank goodness there's only one of Drift and he's gone for most of the Lost Light voyage, Rodimus really doesn't work well with too many yes-men hanging around.
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shuttershocky · 11 months
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Thinking about Riddell again.
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Aside from the fact that the best character in Mahoyo only showed up in its last chapter, Riddell's fascinating because Nasu's always written about how living as a mage sucks, but Riddell's maybe the first time he directly compared it to something and the comparison he chose was being a child celebrity.
Riddell's both. A powerful mage (who's even the Lord of Botany at the Clock Tower by Case Files) and a star musician going on world tours (possibly even a rock star given that Aoko's a fan of hers that tapes her shows) as a mere teenager, you would think her most outstanding trait would be her pride or haughtiness or her overbearing sense of superiority, but while she does have all those traits, the first thing you actually notice about her is that she's incredibly pathetic and sad.
In her very first scene, she breaks into the Kuonji Mansion on a helicopter and cancels her concert, furious that she wasn't invited to Alice's birthday party. Alice explains that (even if they've known each other since childhood) they are rival mages that should kill each other, and they have in fact tried to in the past. Riddell agrees but immediately brushes it off, forcibly adding herself to the guests. Alice later literally crushes her heart with magic. Riddell responds by heaving blood and stumbling back up, saying "It'll take more than a heart attack to kill me!" to keep participating in the party.
It becomes a running theme in the very short time Mahoyo shows her off. Riddell flaunts her wealth, power (both socially and magically) and fame, but is constantly upended by how pitiful she is. She'll talk up her legion of adoring fans but cancel her concert last minute to crash the birthday party of someone actively trying to murder her, because Alice is probably her only real friend. She talks up her daddy buying a helicopter for her with a snap of her fingers, but it turns out she's the one actually making money for the family with her music career. She doesn't even enjoy music, it just makes money to be a celebrity, money that she's got to earn herself.
There's even bonus scenes that you might miss. When Riddell talks to people over the phone, she's highly animated, bossy, and temperamental like a true diva, but if you choose to see an optional scene and spy on her when she's alone she's incredibly depressed and mutters to herself repeatedly about how she's ruined before putting her diva face back on to rejoin the party.
Even when Riddell's trying to lord it over other people, she can't stop slipping in how desperate she is for any human connection. When she says she'll simply take a helicopter home, she offers a ride to anyone, literally somebody, anybody, even the complete strangers in the mansion, because she's soooo rich and generous. Totally.
And it makes sense. A mage family putting all the responsibility and burden of learning the family secrets, transferring the crests, adding to the legacy, and finally securing an heir to keep it all going has a lot in common with a family pushing their celebrity child star into showbiz, keeping the money rolling in while monopolizing their time and keeping them from forming normal relationships with their peers.
It's especially notable that the magical rule Alice uses to try to kill Riddell changes its killing method depending on the person. Someone who just thinks of money can turn into bills, a baker that loves bread can be taken out via a flour explosion, etc.
Riddell's method of death is a heart attack. Some of the cast think it's because an extraordinary person like her most fears an ordinary peasant's death, but it can also be commentary on the stress and overwork her dual lives will lead her to, or reflective of the crushing emptiness she feels with the life she's got.
Anyway it's insane that a scene-stealer like her showed up only in the last chapter, serving no purpose other than to be hilariously cringe and to act as a hook for a Mahoyo sequel that never happened.
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vaguely-concerned · 6 months
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BEHOLD! The list of evidence for my bold claim that Pan and Freddie dislike each other ferociously on sight because they are, in some key ways and despite appearances, very similar people: 
- First instinct upon seeing Grace sad is to try to make her laugh to cheer her up. (See: Freddie’s very first lines in the game starting off as she means to go on, and about half the things Pan ever says or does lol. In the last scene with him before The Trial you can even tell him you’re there just because you wanted to talk to him and have something cheer you up.) General sources of levity and fun and play in Grace’s life if you seek them out. 
- They react with similar anxiety to the idea of Grace being really angry with them (Freddie’s surprised/dismayed “Why are you angry at me?!” in the red route of ‘I Can Teach You’, the millenia-old god of the wild hiding behind a tree for ten minutes because he thinks Grace might be about to yell at him lmao <3)
- Both of them seem to have similar interpersonal insecurities in general, judging by the enforced choice between them in ‘I Can Teach You’ (I love you both so much but oh my god. is this a constructive use of time or energy under the circumstances lol), softened and alleviated by the fact that at the end of the day the most important thing to either of them is that Grace is happy. It isn’t possessiveness, but there is an element of underlying ‘Hey. Hey I am your favorite right?? 🥺’ insecurity there that trips them both up to begin with. Once you play the game and go back to look at this scene again knowing everyone’s real motivations, they’re even coming from the same place deep down — genuine fear for Grace’s safety and wanting to help her. (Freddie uncomplicatedly out of love🥹, and Pan at that stage probably more out of a guilty sense of responsibility, though he does seem to take a shine to Grace herself pretty quickly as well. Also he demonstrably isn’t, uh. Completely wrong in saying Freddie’s involvement in this whole mess is likely to end in tears, even if he is being a real dick about it) 
- If you don’t choose either in ‘I Can Teach You’, they both show up within minutes of each other to watch Grace’s back in the Medusa quest anyway. One brain cell ping pong and no one notices because they keep trying to swat each other with the racquets whenever Grace glances away for a second
Sidenote but flirting with both of them one after the other in that quest is fucking hilarious, they’re just taking turns ‘Really? Right in front of my salad?’-ing directly at the camera (...listen I feel that there is a chance that as long as they kept Grace between them the whole time there could be a thing here. I think a possible universe out there where it happens at least once does exist if one cared to go seek it out. That’s all I’m saying.) 
- Seems a bit obvious but what else am I here for: both very drawn to Grace no matter what main trait you choose. Whether this is true vice versa is of course player-dependent, but it is one way you can play the game. 
- Incredibly similar defensive reactions to being picked on or sniped at (and no hesitation whatsoever in subjecting each other to exactly that immediately anyway haha) 
- A bit dark when you think about it, but they both express the sentiment that it would be better for them to step in and die if it means Grace lives. (Freddie very directly of course ;______; and then in ‘It’s time’, Pan in ‘The Trial’ and the little talk you have with him later in Athena’s office.)  
Matching ‘ride or die’ instincts once awoken, is what I’m getting at. Freddie gets extra points for sheer longevity and constancy, Pan gets extra points for getting there in a week. You’re both unhinged (affectionate) 
- They’re the only ones among the main cast wearing green, right? I think I’ve got that right? Well, Charon does too, I suppose, but he’s a bit more peripheral. (Persephone and Aphrodite wear blue-green, but that seems more associated with death and the underworld and the river of grief everyone keeps using as a metaphor throughout the game.) Somehow I find the idea/metaphor that once you get Pan out from under like three layers of bullshit he’s the same colour as Freddie (who is inarguably The symbol of devotion and steadfastness in this game no matter your choices) quite sweet. 
- Nerds. You know I am right. Slightly different kinds of nerd (Freddie is distinctly geek-flavoured and Pan collects rare books for sport sort of distinction), but still. Oh my god. Freddie should get the whole cast together to play D&D in the Reliquary post-game. It would be absolute carnage. It would be glorious hilarity. *GASP* no wait not the Reliquary, let’s go to the Underworld so Charon gets to play too. For the love of all that is good give this to me now please I need it 
- The only two people who think Freddie losing control of her powers and causing a dance number at a funeral is hilarious
In short this is a recognition of the self through the other (derogatory) situation for both of them and neither of them decides to take that with any dignity or grace (ahaha) in the slightest, I love them very much,  thank you and goodnight 
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austenpoppy · 4 months
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Comparison of Ron and Hermione's contributions in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
I will willingly admit this post was written out of pure spite, tired that I was of seeing people claim Ron had barely contributed to anything in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, or at least way less so than Hermione.
So you know me, what do I do in this sort of case ? I decided to analyse closely what exactly Ron and Hermione did in the book, on different levels and in different ways to completely understand what went on.
Edit: I changed some scores slightly by adding or removing points, and had to recalculate everything, though it didn't change anything to my conclusions; changes are highlighted in bold
List of Ron and Hermione's accomplishments/contributions in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
So of course, to begin my analysis, I needed to list all of their concrete contributions and accomplishments. To be absolutely fair to either of them, I did not take into account feats of bravery that did not ultimately directly help or save anyone (so I did not count Ron begging Bellatrix to torture him instead of Hermione), but I did count elements in which one or the other protected, helped, or saved someone else.
I also listed any Duelling Feat or any fight Ron and Hermione had with Snatchers/Death Eaters/others that had to do with fighting against dark forces or people (I therefore did not include the fact that Ron punched Draco Malfoy during the Battle of Hogwarts).
Anything that helped Harry in the Horcrux Hunt or in getting Voldemort down was taken into account, however small, even if it was just knowledge regarding the Trace (this bit of knowledge allowed the trio to dispel the theory that Death Eaters had found them because Harry still had the Trace) or the location of the Lovegoods, or conjuring up a flask to get Snape's tears. I however omitted intelligent remarks that didn't move the plot forward directly (so for example, I did not include Ron's shrewd comment after he read Mundungus Fletcher's mind).
As Ron and Hermione's feats had to be concrete, I also omitted moments during which Ron was the buffer between Harry and Hermione, or during which one or the other recomforted/or tried to recomfort Harry/the other. I however judged that Ron leading the Horcrux Hunt for months was worthy of being listed, because he took on a major responsibility that helped the trio as they tried to move forward with the Hunt.
To make you understand how I proceeded, each point listed is a thematic element; so several actions from the same event can be listed as separate elements. The chapter in which the element listed happened/was referred to is mentioned after each element.
Ron
1. pretended to be Harry with the help of Polyjuice when he was part of the “Seven Potters” operation (“The Seven Potters”)
2. stunned a Death Eater right in the head from a flying broom (“Fallen Warrior”)
3. saved Hermione in the Tottenham Court Road Café when she didn’t notice that Rowle and Dolohov were going to attack the trio by lunging across the table and pushing her sideways (“A place to hide”)
4. cleared up the café on Tottenham Court Road with Harry after the fight, at Harry’s command (“A place to hide”)
5. gave information to Harry and Hermione regarding the Trace (“A place to hide”)
6. rugby-tackled Mundungus Fletcher when he tried to dive for the stairs (“The bribe”)
7. spied on Ministry workers with the Invisibility Cloak and heard that only the most senior Ministry members could connect their homes to the Floo network (“Magic is Might”)
8. convinced Harry and Hermione that Stunning three Ministry officials was not a good idea because a pile of unconscious bodies would be suspicious, and therefore suggested to use Fred and George’s products (“Magic is Might”)
9. snatched Red Cattermole’s bag without the latter noticing it before Reg Cattermole went back home (“Magic is Might”)
10. pretended to be Reg Cattermole with the help of Polyjuice Potion and convinced Albert Runcorn to take Nosebleed Norgat to ultimately take hair from his head (“Magic is Might”)
11. warned Harry and Hermione that Ministry officials knew there were intruders in the Ministry and that the trio had five minutes at most to leave the place (“The Muggle-Born Registration Commission”)
12. made the most of an uproar cause by the colleagues of some balding wizard to size Mrs. Cattermole and get her out of the Ministry through the fireplace, saving her and getting her away from the real Reg Cattermole – trying to deter other Ministry officials from scrutinizing the situation (“The Muggle-Born Registration Commission”)
13. prevented Harry and Hermione from saying the Taboo (Voldemort’s name) many times, after noticing that it felt like a jinx (“The thief”, “The Goblin’s Revenge”)
14. escaped from a gang of five Snatchers after being captured by them by hitting the one holding him in the stomach and grabbing his wand before Disarming the one who has his wand and Disapparating (“The Silver Doe”)
15. managed to steal a wand from Snatchers and brought the spare wand with him when he came back, which ended up replacing the one broken by Hermione (“The Silver Doe”)
16. saved Harry’s life by jumping into icy water to retrieve Harry who was drowning and by cutting the Horcrux to stop it from strangling Harry; also retrieved the sword of Gryffindor from the icy pond (“The Silver Doe”)
17. faced mental torture at the hands of Voldemort but won against Voldemort’s taunts, resisted possession and destroyed the locket (“The Silver Doe”)
18. learned about the existence of the Taboo during his time away and alerted Harry and Hermione that there was one (“Xenophilius Lovegood”)
19. knew approximatively where the Lovegoods lived (“Xenophilius Lovegood”)
20. led the Horcrux hunt for months while Harry obsessed over the Hallows, not only to search for the Horcruxes but also to gather the team’s spirit (“The Deathly Hallows”)
21. subdued Wormtail with the help of Harry, and took his wand (“Malfoy Manor”)
22. imitated Wormtail to reassure Lucius Malfoy that nothing particular was happening (“Malfoy Manor”)
23. Disarmed Bellatrix Lestrange with Wormtail’s wand (“Malfoy Manor”)
24. saved Hermione by pulling her from under the wreckage caused by the collapse of the chandelier detached from the ceiling by Dobby, and Disapparating after catching a wand thrown at him by Harry (“Malfoy Manor”)
25. was the one who suggested the trio should double-cross Griphook by swapping the real sword of Gryffindor with the fake and give the fake to Griphook to buy enough time for the trio to escape (“Shell Cottage”)
26. pretended to be Dragomir Despard during the trio’s break-out at Gringotts (“Gringotts”)
27. stunned a wizard who was lunging for Hermione’s throat (believing her to be Bellatrix) (“Gringotts”)
28. Stunned Goblins with Harry and Hermione (“Gringotts”)
29. helped Harry cast gouging spells to blast the ceiling apart and facilitate the trio’s escape from Gringotts, after they observed Hermione do it (“Gringotts”)
30. was the one who suggested that the students who were in the Room of Requirement could help them find the other Horcruxes (“The lost diadem”)
31. designed a plan to destroy the cup of Hufflepuff, by remembering the Chamber of Secrets had Basilisk fangs; told Hermione that she should destroy the cup of Hufflepuff (“The Battle of Hogwarts”)
32. managed to imitate Harry saying the word “open” in Parseltongue to open the Chamber of Secrets (“The Battle of Hogwarts”)
33. saved Gregory Goyle’s life by hoisting him on Hermione and he’s broom when the Fiendfyre conjured up by Vincent Crabbe engulfed the Room of Requirement (“The Battle of Hogwarts”)
34. grabbed Hermione with Harry to put her to the floor so she wouldn’t be hit with spells (“The Elder Wand”)
35. threw spells that collided with Harry’s and were cast to repel an Acromentula trying to get inside Hogwarts (“The Elder Wand”)
36. told Harry and Hermione to get back so they wouldn’t be hit by the galloping desks of Minerva McGonagall (“The Elder Wand”)
37. prevented Hermione from casting a spell on Grawp; had she done so Grawp would have crushed “half the castle” (“The Elder Wand”)
38. cast “Wingardium Leviosa” on a twig and waved it into the air to stop the Whomping Willow from moving around; he was spurred on by Hermione’s remark (“The Elder Wand”)
39. broke Voldemort’s Silencing Charm by standing up to him and yelling “He beat you!” (“The Flaw in the Plan”)
40. took down Greyback with Neville (“The Flaw in the Plan”)
Hermione
1. pretended to be Harry with the help of Polyjuice when he was part of the “Seven Potters” operation (“The Seven Potters”) (note: I did not consider that Hermione fought off Death Eaters - or managed to - during that operation because in my opinion, Kingsley Shacklebolt was clearly referring to his own actions when he reported what happened)
2. stole books about Horcruxes from Dumbledore’s study and told Ron and Harry what she had learned about Horcruxes from reading them (“The Ghoul in Pyjamas”)
3. packed elements that could be useful for the Hunt, including a batch of Polyjuice Potion that she stole from Mad-Eye Moody, clothes, the Invisibility Cloak, Essence of Dittany, Puking Pastilles, Nosebleed Norgat, Decoy Detonators, Muggle money, and the tent (“The Ghoul in Pyjamas”)
4. Apparated the trio to Tottenham Court Road (“A place to hide”)
5. Stunned Dolohov while she was underneath a table and out of Dolohov’s sight (“A place to hide”)
6. Obliviated Rowle and Dolohov at Harry’s suggestion (“A place to hide”)
7. cast “Diffindo” to free Ron from the ropes holding him, though she left a deep cut (“A place to hide”)
8. dragged the waitress from the café on Tottenham Court Road’s body out of sight of the windows at Harry’s command (“A place to hide”)
9. cast an “Hominum Revelio” at 12, Grimmauld Place to check whether the trio was really alone or not (“A place to hide”)
10. remembered that the locket was in the cabinet in the drawing room of 12, Grimmauld Place when the Order was cleaning the house (“Kreacher’s Tale”)
11. Disarmed Mundungus Fletchers at 12, Grimmauld Place (“The Bribe”)
12. put Phineas Nigellus’ portrait inside her bag as she remembered he could travel from Grimmauld Place to Hogwarts (“Magic is Might”); later cast a black blindfold with the spell “Obscura” on him to prevent him from seeing inside the tent (“The Goblin’s Revenge”)
13. spied on Ministry workers with the Invisibility Cloak and heard information that indicated where Umbridge’s office might be (“Magic is Might”)
14. Stunned Mafalda Hopkirk using a non-verbal spell (“Magic is Might”)
15. pretended to be Mafalda Hopkirk with the help of Polyjuice Potion and convinced Reg Cattermole to take a Puking Pastille, before yanking hair from his head when he started throwing up (“Magic is Might”)
16. pretended to be Mafalda Hopkirk with the help of Polyjuice Potion and convinced Albert Runcorn to take Nosebleed Norgat to ultimately take hair from his head (“Magic is Might”)
17. duplicated the locket with a “Gemino” spell so that Umbridge wouldn’t notice the locket was gone (“The Muggle-Born Registration Commission”)
18. cast a Patronus, though with difficulty, to help Harry deter Dementors from coming near the group comprised of Harry, Hermione and Muggle-Borns (“The Muggle-Born Registration Commission”)
19. Apparated the trio in a forest after casting a Revulsion Jinx on Yaxley because Yaxley had got hold of her and Hermione had unwillingly get Yaxley in the Fidelius Charm cast on 12, Grimmauld Place (“The thief”)
20. saved Ron’s life with Essence of Dittany after having Splinched him (“The thief”)
21. was the first to cast protective enchantments around the tent (“The thief”)
22. noticed that the locket was having a negative influence on Harry (“The Goblin’s Revenge”)
23. figured out with Harry that the sword of Gryffindor could destroy Horcruxes because it was Goblin-made and Goblin-made swords imbibe only that which strengthens them, in this case Basilisk venom, and that Dumbledore had made a fake sword of Gryffindor because he knew the Ministry wouldn’t let Harry have the sword if he put it in his will (“The Goblin’s Revenge”)
24. saved Harry’s life after Hermione cast a spell on Nagini to force the snake to get away from Harry; dived aside to avoid it from striking her and one of her spells smashed the windows; cast a Blasting Curse charm that “flew around the room, exploding the wardrobe mirror and ricocheting back at them, bouncing from floor to ceiling”, though it also broke Harry’s wand (“Bathilda’s secret”, (“The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore”)
25. took care of Harry by getting the locket, stuck to Harry’s chest, away with a Severing Charm; she also cleaned the wound caused by Nagini and put some dittany on it (“The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore”)
26. understood that the symbol of the Deathly Hallows was important after seeing it around Xenophilius Lovegood’s neck at Bill and Fleur’s wedding, on Ignotus Peverell’s headstone at Godric’s Hollows and in The Tales of Beedle the Bard (“Xenophilius Lovegood”)
27. designed a plan so that the Death Eaters who were at Xenophilius Lovegood’s house could see he was not lying about Harry’s presence: she got Ron to put on the Invisibility Cloak so that his presence wouldn’t be known, waited for Xenophilius to appear at the top of the stairs before Obliviating him and destroying the floor so that the Death Eaters could see the trio right before Hermione Apparated them away (“The Tale of the Three Brothers”)
28. cursed Harry’s face to make it unrecognizable so that the Snatchers wouldn’t see it was Harry (“Malfoy Manor”)
29. lied under torture done at the hands of Bellatrix Lestrange that the sword of Gryffindor was fake (“Malfoy Manor”)
30. cast Glamour Charms on Ron to modify his appearance so he wouldn’t be recognized during their break-in Gringotts (“Gringotts”)
31. pretended to be Bellatrix with the help of Polyjuice Potion (“Gringotts”)
32. had to do most of the talking in trying to convince Travers and in trying to get the different Goblins to let the trio access Bellatrix’s vault (“Gringotts”)
33. cast a Cushioning Charm to soften the fall of the trio after they were thrown off the cart (“Gringotts”)
34. cast a Shield Charm to slower the people trying to catch the trio (“Gringotts”)
35. used “Levicorpus” to help Harry get the cup of Hufflepuff (“Gringotts”)
36. cast “Impervius” to protect Ron, Harry, the goblins and herself from being too badly burned after spells were cast on objects in Bellatrix’s vault (“Gringotts”)
37. Stunned Goblins with Harry and Ron (“Gringotts”)
38. was the first to cast gouging spells to blast the ceiling apart and facilitate the trio’s escape from Gringotts (“Gringotts”)
39. destroyed the cup of Hufflepuff (“The Battle of Hogwarts”)
40. Stunned Gregory Goyle in the Room of Requirement (“The Battle of Hogwarts”)
41. cast “Glisseo” so the trio would escape two masked Death Eaters (“The Elder Wand”)
42. cast “Duro” on a tapestry so the two masked Death Eaters pursuing the trio would face a wall (“The Elder Wand”)
43. cast a spell to blast Fenrir Greyback away from Lavender Brown (“The Elder Wand”)
44. conjured a flask and gave it to Harry so Harry could retrieve Snape’s tears (“The Elder Wand”)
Conclusions
From this you can see that in terms of sheer numbers, Ron and Hermione's contributions are roughly equal (40 for Ron, 44 for Hermione). Considering that depending on the way I managed the two lists I could have added some elements for Ron (e.g., telling Dobby to bring Dean, Luna and Mr. Ollivander at Shell Cottage in "Malfoy Manor") or removed items for Hermione (e.g., casting the "Diffindo" spell on Ron at the Tottenham Court Road café), I consider a 4-point difference to be negligible. For reference, I would consider a point difference above 8 (1/5 of Ron's contributions) significant.
Weighting-analysis of Ron and Hermione's contributions
Of course simply listing their feats and contributions was not enough, since all of them are not as impressive, were not as important, had unwanted consequences, or were the result of negligence, a mistake, or something else. So I also had to weigh on each of the items listed. To be fair to Hermione, I also added two "mistakes" for Ron that were not part of his contributions.
My point system is of course very subjective, but I think most will consider it fair. I calculated Ron and Hermione's points separately and only did the total in the end to try to be as unbiased as possible (though I did check that the number of points I would grant to one was equal to the number of points I would grant to the other for a contribution of similar nature).
Point system
+ 0.25 = small contribution
+ 0.5 = medium contribution; small duelling feat; small or medium element pertaining to the protection of others and/or reaction time in a dangerous situation and/or evaluation of a dangerous situation and/or defence or escape against unwanted forces
+ 1 or + 2 = important contribution; duelling feat; important element pertaining to the protection of others and/or reaction time in a dangerous situation and/or evaluation of a dangerous situation and/or defence or escape against unwanted forces
Bonus points
+ 0.5, + 1, + 2, or +3 for skill or particular display of intelligence or creativity (more bonus points can be added depending on the situation)
+ 1, +2 or +3 if the situation is risky and/or required particular bravery (more bonus points can be added depending on the situation)
+ 2 or + 3 if the element listed had to do with saving someone’s life, protecting someone from danger, or taking care of someone else
+ 5 for destroying a Horcrux
Malus points
- 0.25 or – 0.5 for a small mistake (especially one that hurt another person or could have endangered them)
- 1, - 2, or – 3 for a bigger mistake (especially one that really hurt another person or could have really endangered them)
Ron
1. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (the situation was very risky; Tonks and Ron were continuously and furiously followed by Bellatrix Lestrange)
2. + 2 (impressive duelling feat) + 3 (the situation was very risky; see above) + 3 (for skill)
3. + 1 (important contribution) + 2 (he saved Hermione and sacrificed his own safety to do so) + 2 (the situation was risky) + 0.5 (for his rather quick reaction time)
4. + 0.25 (small contribution)
5. + 0.25 (small contribution)
6. + 0.5 (medium contribution)
7. + 1 (important contribution) + 1 (the situation was risky)
8. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (for the creativity and intelligence shown in the design of the plan); however - 0.25 (the plan backfired slightly due to Reg Cattermole's dedication to being present for his wife, though it's very likely this would have happened even if the trio had stunned him, since Stunning Spells wear off)
9. + 0.5 (medium contribution) + 0.5 (for the skill it took to take steal somebody else's bag without them noticing)
10. + 0.5 (medium contribution)
11. + 1 (important contribution) + 2 (the situation was risky) + 2 (for his ability to get the information to Harry and Hermione rapidly)
12. + 1 (important contribution) + 2 (the situation was very risky) + 1 (he got Mrs. Cattermole away from the Ministry) + 2 (for his quick-thinking)
13. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (this is one of Ron's very underrated contributions to the Hunt; think that literally every time Ron prevented Harry or Hermione from saying the Taboo, he prevented the Trio from being captured: what's more, it happened at least three times on screen, but there were undoubtedly dozens of moments like this one) + 1 (Ron's intuition told him something was off with Voldemort's name because his brain had picked up on a pattern even though he couldn't pinpoint what was amiss exactly)
14. + 2 (he escaped from Snatchers on his own) + 2 (the situation was very risky) + 3 (for the mad skill it took to escape five assailants, retrieve your wand and steal one of theirs)
15. + 2 (I already counted Ron's skill in the item above, but this was for having thought about bringing the spare wand)
16. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (he saved Harry's life) + 3 (he did so at great risks to himself) + 2 (for thinking about taking the sword of Gryffindor at such a moment)
17. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (had to endure mental torture and had to show great bravery) + 3 (he had to resist possession) + 5 (for destroying a Horcrux)
18. + 2 (important contribution)
19. + 0.25 (small contribution)
20. + 2 (important contribution)
21. + 2 (important contribution) + 1 (the situation was risky) + 1 (for his synchronisation with Harry and for thinking about taking his wand)
22. + 2 (important contribution) + 1 (the situation was risky, considering Lucius Malfoy suspected something was wrong) + 2 (for his quick-thinking) + 2 (for the skill it took to credibly imitate someone he'd barely heard)
23. + 2 (impressive duelling feat) + 3 (the situation was very risky) + 3 (for the skill it took to Disarm Bellatrix Lestrange; another underrated moment for Ron because people dismiss this considering Bellatrix was surprised, even though she had time to turn toward Ron...what do people think duelling is, exactly ?)
24. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (he saved Hermione's life) + 3 (he did so at great risks to himself, considering that he didn't have any wand at that point and had to quickly take Hermione from under tons of broken glass)
25. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (because this was a great plan)
26. + 2 (important contribution) + 2 (the situation was risky)
27. + 2 (important contribution) + 2 (he protected Hermione from being attacked and hurt) + 2 (the situation was dangerous) + 2 (for his quick reaction)
28. + 1 (important contribution) + 2 (the situation was risky)
29. + 0.5 (medium contribution)
30. + 1 (important contribution) + 1 (because this was a good idea)
31. + 2 (important contribution) + 5 (for designing the plan that ended up with the destruction of the Horcrux) + 3 (the plan was brilliant)
32. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (for the skill it took to credibly imitate a word he had heard twice in a foreign language he didn't understand)
33. + 3 (the situation was very dangerous) + 2 (he saved Goyle's life and he alone made that choice since he was holding the broom, but other people influenced or could have influenced his decision) - 2 (he risked Hermione's life in doing so)
34. + 2 (important contribution) + 2 (the situation was risky, spells were flying everywhere) + 2 (he prevented Hermione from getting hurt) + 1 (for his quick reaction time)
35. + 2 (important contribution) + 2 (the situation was risky and he had just lost his brother) + 2 (for his quick reaction and skill)
36. + 1 (important contribution) + 2 (he prevented Harry and Hermione from getting hurt) + 2 (for his quick reaction)
37. + 1 (important contribution) + 1 (he probably protected people from terrible unwanted consequences) + 2 (for his quick reaction and his quick-thinking)
38. + 0.5 (medium contribution)
39. + 1 (important contribution) + 3 (the situation was very risky) + 3 (for the sheer nerve of standing up to Voldemort)
40. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (the situation was very risky) + 2 (Greyback was a tough opponent, but Ron was not alone when he took him down)
Supplementary malus points:
When he Disapparated after he left the Horcrux Hunt and ended up in a gang of Snatchers: - 1 (and reminder for everybody that the person writing this does NOT hold Ron responsible for what happened with the Horcrux and for leaving the tent); it could have had very negative consequences for Harry and Hermione but effectively it had none
When he nearly yelled Dobby's name at Malfoy Manor: - 0.5 : it could have had terrible consequences had the other Death Eaters head him but effectively it had none
Total: 183.5
Hermione
1. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (the situation was very risky; Kingsley and she even got followed by Voldemort for a short while)
2. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (the information was essential, getting her hands on the books required creativity on Hermione's part and required for her to plan ahead and think about what the trio would need)
3. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (all the elements that Hermione took in her bag ended up essential in the following months and demanded that Hermione plan ahead and think about what the trio would need; stealing Mad-Eye Moody's whole stock of Polyjuice Potion also required creativity on Hermione's part)
4. + 0.25 (small contribution)
5. + 1 (duelling feat, but she was out of sight) + 2 (the situation was risky); however - 1 because her slow reaction time forced Ron to push her aside, which means he didn't have time to defend himself) - note: if you want to know more about why I say that Hermione had a slow reaction time, I suggest you take a look at my analysis of Hermione's flaws in the last book
6. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (for the skill it took to succeed in doing a spell for the first time)
7. + 0.25 (small contribution); however - 0.5 because she cut Ron deeply
8. + 0.25 (small contribution)
9. + 0.25 (small contribution) + 1 (Hermione's caution was warranted and wise)
10. + 2 (important contribution)
11. + 0.5 (small duelling feat)
12. + 1 (important contribution) + 3 (for the intelligence shown in having thought about it)
13. + 1 (important contribution) + 1 (the situation was risky)
14. + 0.5 (medium contribution) + 2 (for skill, considering she used a non-verbal spell)
15. + 0.5 (medium contribution)
16. + 0.5 (medium contribution)
17. + 1 (important contribution) + 2 (the situation was very risky) + 3 (for the intelligence shown in having thought about it)
18. + 1 (important contribution) + 2 (the situation was risky) + 2 (this helped protect others)
19. + 0.5 (medium contribution) + 0.5 (small duelling feat) + 2 (the situation was risky) + 1 (for her quick-thinking); however -0.5 because the reason Yaxley got hold of Hermione is in my opinion because her reaction time was too slow to begin with; Harry was the one who had to take her hand to get away in the first place
20. + 2 for saving Ron's life (I'm only counting +2 because what really helped Ron was to have thought about packing Essence of Dittany, and I already took that into account) + 2 (for not completely losing her wits) ; however - 3 for having Splinched him in the first place
21. + 2 (important contribution) + 2 (though Harry and Ron might have thought about it, those Charms were really important in protecting the trio and she was the first to think about it)
22. + 2 (important contribution) + 2 (had she not realised it, who knows what could have happened ?)
23. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (deducting those elements were essential for the next part of the Horcrux Hunt, and showed great intelligence)
24. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (she was faced with Nagini) + 3 (she directly saved Harry's life) + 2 (though not a duelling feat, her knowledge of spells and quick-thinking ought to be rewarded); however - 3 for breaking Harry's wand
25. + 2 (took care of Harry when he was delirious)
26. + 2 (important contribution) + 2 (for having made the link between the different elements she had found)
27. + 1 (important contribution, but didn't have to do with the Hunt directly; the trio could have left without it impacting the Hunt) + 1 (the situation was risky, though the trio could have gotten away before it getting risky) + 2 (her plan probably protected Xenophilius Lovegood) + 3 (the plan was brilliant)
28. + 0.5 (medium contribution, it ultimately had very little impact since the trio was brought to Malfoy Manor and Bellatrix Lestrange recognized them anyway) + 2 (the situation was pressing) + 1 (this helped protect the trio if only a little) + 2 (for her quick-thinking)
29. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (the situation was awful, and she had to endure torture) + 3 (for her quick-thinking) + 3 (for the sheer nerve of lying to Bellatrix Lestrange)
30. + 1 (important contribution)
31. + 2 (important contribution) + 2 (the situation was risky)
32. + 2 (important contribution) + 2 (the situation was risky) + 3 (for having pulled off the Bellatrix impression)
33. + 1 (important contribution) + 3 (the situation was dangerous) + 2 (she prevented the Trio from getting hurt) + 2 (for her quick-thinking)
34. + 2 (important contribution) + 1 (the situation was pressing) + 2 (for her quick-thinking)
35. + 2 (important contribution) + 1 (the situation was pressing) + 2 (for creativity)
36. + 2 (important contribution) + 3 (the situation was dangerous) + 2 (she prevented the trio and goblins from getting hurt)
37. + 1 (important contribution) + 2 (the situation was risky)
38. + 2 (important contribution) + 2 (the situation was pressing) + 2 (for her quick-thinking)
39. + 2 (important contribution) + 5 (for destroying a Horcrux)
40. + 0.5 (small duelling feat) + 2 (the situation was risky)
41. + 2 (this helped the trio get away from Death Eaters) + 2 (the situation was risky) + 2 (for her quick-thinking)
42. + 2 (important contribution) + 2 (the situation was risky) + 2 (for her quick-thinking)
43. + 2 (important contribution) + 1 (the situation was risky, but she was under the Invisibility Cloak) + 3 (she probably saved Lavender Brown's life)
44. + 0.25 (small contribution)
Total: 170.75
Conclusion
While factoring other elements such as the importance of the contribution in helping taking down Voldemort or fighting against dark forces in general, the level of dangerousness in which the contribution happened and the levels of bravery and/or sacrifices required to accomplish the feat, the level of intelligence or creativity involved, quick-thinking, quick reaction time, the level of skill involved to accomplish the feat, mistakes... You can see that Ron and Hermione's contributions are still roughly equal (according to my point system, Ron has 182.5 points and Hermione has 171.75... This is probably due to the fact that Ron not only destroyed a Horcrux but was directly responsible for designing the plan that allowed Hermione to destroy another -granting him + 10 points directly-, and to the fact that Hermione made more mistakes with rather terrible consequences - so Hermione has more malus points), and the point difference between them may seem important, but as I said I consider a point difference to be significant when it hits the bar of 1/5 of the lowest score (here 1/5 of 171.75 = 34.35, yet the point difference between the two scores is 12.75).
Nature of the Contributions
Ron and Hermione are different, and contributed differently to the Horcrux Hunt. I decided upon 8 categories: Strategy/Tactical Thinking; Research, Planning, Knowledge; Deductions; Duelling Feats and Fights; Quick Thinking in dangerous scenarios (which does not correspond to situations requiring a quick reaction time, those are counted in different categories depending on what it ended up doing, but is more akin to "presence of mind"); Resistance against Evil; Protection of others; Leadership. I thought that to really understand Ron and Hermione's profiles, I would put each item listed above in one or more of the categories but also count the points I attributed to each item in my weighting-analysis. There are in the end certain items that did not fit any of the category and that I thought best not to include.
Ron
Strategy/Tactical Thinking: 8 (4.75 points), 25 (5 points), 30 - knowing how to use people to one's advantage - (2 points), 31 (10 points), 37 - spatial reasoning - (4 points) = 25,75 points
Research, Planning, Knowledge: 5 (0.25 points), 7, (2 points), 11 (3 points) 15 (2 points), 18 (2 points), 9 (0.25 points) = 9.5 points
Deductions: 13 (6 points) = 6 points [reminder: this is not a representation of Ron's capacity for deduction, since there are many intelligent remarks I did not include in my analysis; this category only shows deductions that moved the plot forward)
Duelling Feats and Fights: 2 (8 points), 6 (0.5 points), 14 (7 points), 21 (4 points), 23 (8 points), 27 (5 - 2 points - I deduced the points granted to him for protecting Hermione for that category = 2 points), 28 (1 point), 35 (6 points), 40 (7 points) = 43,5 points
Quick Thinking in dangerous scenarios: 3 (5.5 - 2 - I deduced the points granted to him for saving Hermione for that category = 3.5), 9 (1 point), 11 (5 points), 12 (6 points), 14 (7 points), 16 (10 - 3 points - I deduced the points granted to him for saving Harry's life for that category = 7 points), 21 (4 points), 22 (7 points), 31, (10 points), 32 (5 points), 34 (7 - 3 - I deduced the points granted to him for saving Hermione for that category = 4), 36 (5 - 2 - I deduced the points granted to him for saving Harry and Hermione = 3), 37 (4 points) = 66 points
Resistance against Evil: 17 (13 points), 39 (7 points) = 20 points
Protection of others: 1 (5 points), 3 (5.5 points), 12 (6 points), 16 (10 points), 24 (8 points), 27 (8 points), 33 (3 points), 34 (7 points), 36 (5 points) = 57,5 points
Leadership: 20 (2 points) = 2 points
Hermione
Strategy/Tactical Thinking: 27 (6 points), 34 (5 points) = 11 points
Research, Planning, Knowledge : 2 (5 points), 3 (5 points), 6 (5 points)- I'm referring to her knowledge of spells -, 13 (2 points) 14 (2.5 points) -idem-, 21 (4 points), 26 (4 points), 30 (1 point) -idem- = 28.5 points
Deductions: 10 (2 points), 12 (4 points), 22 (4 points), 23 (5 points), 26 (4 points) = 19 points
Duelling Feats and Fights: 5 (2 points), 11 (0.5 points), 19 (3.5 points), 24 (7 - 3 points - I deduced the points granted to her for saving Harry's life for that category = 4 points), 37 (3 points), 40 (2.5 points), 42 (6 points), 43 (6 - 3 points - I deduced the points granted to her for saving Lavender's life for that category) = 24.5 points
Quick Thinking in dangerous scenarios: 17 (6 points), 19 (3.5 points), 27 (7 points), 28 (5.5 points), 29 (11 points), 32 (7 points), 33 (8 - 2 points - I deduced the points I granted to her from preventing the trio from getting hurt for that category = 6 points), 34 (5 points), 35 (5 points), 37 (7 points), 38 (5 points), 41 (6 - 2 points - I deduced the points I granted to her for allowing the trio to escape for that category = 4 points), 42 (6 points) = 78 points
Resistance against Evil: 29 (11 points), 39 (7 points) = 18 points
Protection of others: 1 (5 points), 18 (5 points), 19 (3.5 points), 20 (1 point), 21 (4 points), 24 (7 points), 25 (2 points), 36 (7 points), 41 (6 points), 43 (6 points) = 44.5 points
Leadership: 0 point (I did not count what happened at the Lovegoods as "Leadership" because trusting one person at one given moment to carry out a plan does not show, to me, that they are "the leader"; otherwise I would also count other plans made by Ron as examples of him being a Leader).
Conclusion
This to me so clearly shows what Ron and Hermione's strengths are. In terms of "Resistance against evil", both have roughly the same amount of points, while the point difference in "Quick Thinking in dangerous scenarios" is not significant according to my arbitrary cut-point (above 1/5 of the lowest score), showing that both Ron and Hermione are strong-willed and are quick-thinking in dangerous situations.
Hermione is in the lead in the categories "Research, Planning, Knowledge" (with a 19 point difference, the 1/5 of the lowest score being 1.9) and "Deductions" (with a 13 point difference, the 1/5 of the lowest score being 1.2). For the first case, the reason is obvious: out of the three members of the trio, Hermione is the one who thinks about what kind of knowledge, what tools, what objects they will need. She's also generally better at casting spells/ doing magic. The second case offers a bit less insight, because Ron's observations that did not directly make the Horcrux Hunt progress/had no real impact were not included even though many of them were brilliant. However, I think it does show that between Ron and Hermione, Hermione is the one who makes deductions that help move the plot forward.
Ron is in the lead in the categories "Strategy/Tactical Thinking" (with a 14.75 point difference, the 1/5 of the lowest score being 2.2) and "Duelling Feats and Fights" (with a point difference of 19 points, the 1/5 of the lowest score being 4.9). Again, not surprising. Despite people's inexplicable tendency to think Ron only showed his Strategic skills in Book 1, Ron is a very good tactician and strategist (Hermione is a good strategist when it comes to politics, but not war). Ron, unlike Hermione, is a fighter/soldier, with quicker reaction time and more impressive duelling feats. It shows in the sequence at Malfoy Manor when Ron and Harry are fighting together; the two are completely synchronised.
Ron being ahead in "Leadership" is only a reflection of the fact that Ron is Harry's second-in-command.
The category that I was most interested in was "Protection of Others" since Ron ended up being slightly ahead, too (with a 13 point difference, the 1/5 of the lowest score being 8.9). I think it mostly reflects the fact that Hermione has knowledge that helps protect people and or save them while Ron goes above and beyond to protect people in the heat of the moment (which means Ron got more bonus points).
Overall conclusion (for now...)
The hypothesis presented that Hermione contributed much more to the Hunt than Ron is quite absurd indeed.
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garycxjk · 5 months
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Why everybody gets 100 Girlfriends wrong
I've been seeing quite a few comments that completely misinterpret The 100 Girlfriends Who Really, Really, Really, Really, Really Love You, so I'm gonna break down to you the series a bit, trying to not spoil it for anime onlies. This is mainly in response to someone wondering why they don't just "speedrun girlfriends".
100 Girlfriends, first and foremost, is not a romance manga. It's a comedy manga with focus on romance, yes, but first and foremost, it's a parody manga. It's parody in the same sense that Gintama is a parody. Yes, it's an affectionate parody, but a parody nonetheless.
It already starts with the premise that the main character has 100 girlfriends. The focus actually isn't the 100 girlfriends, it has always been the girlfriend archetypes. The pervert, the tsundere, the non-communicative one, the kuudere. They deconstruct, then reconstruct each and every single one. This is why it also does not speedrun the girlfriends, because it shouldn't.
In fact, the first seven chapters (up to episode 5) do show this already, it has a slight pacing problem. Not because it takes too much time to get to each girlfriend, but because it doesn't take its time to give us the deconstruction and reconstruction phases. It is only from the next two chapters (or episode 6) on that it basically uses each girl's traits and shows us creative ways they work with them.
But they had to speedrun at least the first four girlfriends to give us an idea of what the premise is. Rentarou is an impossible protagonist who actually manages to make a polyamorous relationship work. I'll get back to that later, but keep this in mind. It needs to establish the actual rules.
We know the visible rules, that if Rentarou rejects a girlfriend, she'll die. However, chapter 3, and by extension episode 3, establishes directly that Rentarou doesn't just make these girlfriends his because they'd otherwise die, he actually genuinely starts caring for them, and wants to love them, while at the same time he wants them to care for him.
This is one of the manga rules people miss, because, forget the rejection means death rule. That rule hasn't been important since episode 3 anymore, and hasn't even been brought up that much in episode 5, and that's the initial mistake many manga readers made when getting to chapter 7. However, from chapter 8 on (the next episode), something magical happened. We finally figured out that this manga has never actually been about playing the romance part straight. It was always a comedy first and foremost.
You see, the fourth wall breaks, the absurd situations, the literal physical abuse Rentarou gets (from Karane of all people). Heck, even the anime opening. Especially the first point, the fourth wall breaks, those should tell you that the manga never really takes itself too seriously. Yes, it does take the romance parts seriously, but that's because if you don't do that, it doesn't work as a parody.
Take Gintama. It's a parody of shounen manga (and by extension anime). However, it is also a shounen manga in and of itself, that part it still plays straight. If it was just riffing on shounen manga, do you think it would have been as successful as it has been right now?
Or take the many films by Mel Brooks, and one in particular, Spaceballs. Spaceballs is a parody of science fiction films, but Star Wars in particular. However, it still is a science fiction film in and of itself, it still takes that part serious enough to make the parody work.
Compare that to the later Scary Movie films or those other movie parodies. They didn't work because it became pop culture reference, the movie, instead of being a parody of the genre while still playing that genre straight enough to make it work. They fundamentally forgot how parodies work, which is why the parody film died.
So let's go back to my comment about Rentarou being the impossible boyfriend. Many manga readers joke about Rentarou being the chad, or Chadtarou. However, by now we've realized one thing about him. He's literally an unrealistic standard when it comes to boyfriends.
There's a reason the meme "Chapter 1: I want to become Rentarou, Chapter X: I want to be Rentarou's." We realize that we literally cannot be Rentarou, nor would we even want to be Rentarou, because, face it, his job sucks. He has to take care of, what, four girlfriends at this point, which already seems like an impossible task in real life, but Rentarou goes above and beyond to make sure each girlfriend is equally loved. Not proportionally, no, equally. And with each new girlfriend, he doesn't divide the love he has between his current girlfriends and his newest girlfriend, no, he adds on top of it. It's like, at the start, Rentarou's love capacity is 100%, but then he gets two soulmates. Does he just divide his love in two, 50% for Hakari, 50% for Karane? No, he gives 100% to Hakari and 100% to Karane.
At this point, we'd just rather be Rentarou's **girlfriend**, because at least we **know** we can and will be loved by him 100%. Rentarou deliberately sets an impossible standard for the harem protagonist, because it's a standard that should never be reached by any living being. Rentarou in and of himself is the ultimate parody of a harem protagonist, and the reason for that is so that the manga and anime can safely parody every single romance trope that exists.
So, to break down the five episodes for you, to explain why it's paced like this:
Ep. 1: It explains the premise of the story, and how it's going to subvert your expectations.
Ep. 2: It shows an explanation of such subversions.
Ep. 3: It shows you the more serious side of this anime.
Ep. 4: It subverts the harem narrative.
Ep. 5: Basically the same as episode 3, combined with trying to deconstruct and reconstruct the archetype of the week.
And you will notice that with each new girlfriend, it will do the deconstruction and reconstruction in one episode. It needs to explain an archetype, show how it would actually work in reality, and turn it around and make it actually work in the bigger picture. Then, in the following episode, it will... well, you will have to find out soon I guess. But there is a pattern.
To sum it up:
1. This anime isn't a harem romcom. It's a parody of romance manga.
2. Each girlfriend represents an archetype that gets deconstructed and reconstructed.
3. Likewise, without going too much into spoiler territory, any situation is a parody of an existing romance trope.
4. Rentarou isn't your typical harem protagonist, because he isn't meant to be one, he's meant to be a parody of one.
5. The reason it doesn't speedrun girlfriends is to give each girlfriend enough time to parody.
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Hear. Me. Out.
Lord of calamity pls. "You belong to me now" prompt with reader who's also part of the COA squad (the survivors) pls?
Hear what? Im in his dms. Im licking his tentacles. Im fucking the outer hp lovecraftian god, anon. Im built different lolol hastur is my wife and i love him to pieces
Rated T | Warning: Lovecraftian themed
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Perhaps it is too much to ask of humanity to not embrace the false bliss from the creature who is killing the world, but can you blame them? The pain, the loss, it chips at the soul until there are only shards at the feet of this… Thing. The whispers call it Lord Of Calamity, you find it strange it has a name. If Luchino was… If the professor was here, he would hypothesize this creature has been here before. That is the only reason it has such a grim name.
You fear the others are lost to you. Frederick may not be a pod like the others but he talks nonsense as he seems to offer the thing worship— Praise!
You only escaped the pod because… You are not sure actually. One moment you were in paradise, everything you could ever want but you… You saw through the lies. The deceit and it made you angry.
Humans, like animals, can react violently when there is no way to escape. A fight or flight response but you could only fight. In that paradise you killed someone, then another person, more and more until you woke up screaming and crawling at the pod.
Maskless, your clothing is slimy, and parts of it appear to have been started to be eaten at. You stand by Frederick up at the creature.
It is like looking into the abyss.
And soon the abyss looks back at you.
“Fascinating,” You turn around to see the creature now standing not far from you, it made a version of itself to speak directly with you. “Not many of your kind can escape serenity. This one is curious, was it not to your liking?” Polite.
“My liking?” You stand defensive with one foot in front of you and hands making fists, “That was not real!”
“It is as real as you wish it to be. A paradise of your own making. Were you not satisfied?”
“Paradise is not created from a lie.”
“This one has seen humanity prove otherwise.”
What are you supposed to say? Are you supposed to defend humanity with a battle of words? Which you try to do with everything you have but this creature counters every one of your statements. At one point you fear you might believe that humanity has become a blight upon this earth— No! You shake your head and then look around you, you refuse to let that numb feeling of hopelessness get to you.
“You wish this one harm.”
“I wish to leave.” Looking back at the creature. You move slightly to the side and a tendril from the ground wraps itself around your ankle locking you in place. A tug or two and you glare at the creature.
“This one tries to grant you a painless death. Suffering gives this one no pleasure. A mercy humanity is ill-deserving of.”
You look away then look up at it as it slips close to you suddenly, “Lord of Calamity, have you done this before?”
It is quiet, its hand reaching out to touch your face even though you try moving your head away, “At the pinnacle of your species, this one will consume all. A few will live, chosen by natural selection. The one called Frederick shall be my voice. The one called Luchino will be my enforcer.” The creature is laying out its plans. “The others have no use to me. They may enjoy bliss until they perish.”
“You bastard.” Grimacing at the way the fungal tendril maps out your face. A smooth slime trail and you struggle as more tendrils appear from under you grabbing you.
“This one has not seen your type in many of its lives. Few are granted omniscience, your kind is showing growth between each annihilation and rebirth.”
“What are you talking about?! Let me go!” Fighting your damndest to get out of its hold.
“A birth of a God. A fledgling one but a God nonetheless. You shall create a new world.” So matter of fact, “You belong to this one, fledgling. Once you have matured, you will provide companionship to this one.”
You feel yourself being pulled down like before back into a pod, you scream at it.
“Rest. Dream. Envision the world you will create.”
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thygoddessouijathicc · 5 months
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So I’ve kinda been thinking (COTL post btw I’ll get back on some DSAF stuff soon). Spoilers for post game.
Purgatory is kinda underutilized in fics.
The bishops have spent who knows how long reliving their deaths on repeat and each seems to kinda have different feelings about this judging from their purgatory pre battle dialogue.
Leshy repeats his initial dialogue from the original fight, but at the end seems to have something of a cry for help with “end this” implying he does indeed find the experience to be hellish. It feels like a plea for any kind of mercy, not as blatant as Kallamar sure but just as poignant. Leshy is suffering BADLY, bad enough that he’s begging for an end to it. The fact he repeats the original dialogue too is also interesting because of this. The whole thing feels very… defeated. It makes sense, he’s been here the longest in most playthroughs. He’s accepted he can’t fight his way out and has resigned to fighting, but still begs for freedom.
Heket is seemingly angry about this and seems to be venting her anger through what is currently her only outlet, killing the lamb repeatedly, which she may or may not be finding more success in than the others as she seems to be less damaged implying she’s been dying less than she’s been killing. Time in a hellish purgatory may have in fact strengthened her resolve to fight. Though I’d say it feels like a temporary resolve, something of a desperate grab to take power of this situation, eventually things will change and she’ll end up in a much similar place to the others.
Kallamar’s dialogue is what is to be expected from the so called “scardy squid”, he begs us to stay back and not hurt him. This is probably the most clear cut display of the effects of purgatory being that he’s seemingly just more scared of us and in a lot of pain. Kallamar I find to be interesting because I’m getting the impression that while other siblings MAY be coaxed to deviate from the norm (maybe not Shamura as they seem pretty ok with this), Kallamar seems the most likely. I can see Kallamar trying to escape the lamb rather than confront them, while others may do this for Kal it feels very likely he not only has done this, but has done it a lot, never succeeding and resolving to just beg for mercy. While Leshy isn’t directly talking to the player Kal says “red crown” meaning there’s no greater force or anything he’s begging to, he’s ONLY begging to us.
Shamura’s dialogue here is very interesting. It feels like they are very resolved to their fate of repeating this eternally and not only don’t care to escape it, but see this fate as a deserved punishment. For Narinder, crimes as a bishop, the lamb genocide, or all of the above we can’t quite say, I’d say probably a mix of all. Regardless, Shamura seems to be in a state of acceptance of this being the rest of their eternity. Their dialoge also implies a Sisyphus situation of “drawing semblance of life” from routine in a known situation where everything is the same. I’m not sure I’d say they are CONTENT like this, but they’re definitely accepting and the fact they seem to think they deserve eternal purgatory hell seems to definitely be part of this.
I feel like all 4 reactions are interesting thematically. Leshy’s feelings of defeat, Heket’s struggle for control, Kallamar’s utter terror and desperation, and Shamura’s passive acceptance.
However I don’t see a lot of people talking about this in fact a lot of fics seem to say the bishops don’t even remember purgatory which is interesting in itself but personally I’d definitely touch on the fact they each had their own individual somewhat breakdowns of their character, and the affect this would have on their minds going forward, especially on their views of themselves, the lamb who was somewhat the vessel for their torture and their behaviour in general. Would they gain new responses? Would certain things like specific weapons trigger memories of their time in purgatory? Would they dream about it?
Just so much cool fuckin shit to explore! I might sometime if any of my DSaF followers stuck it out for this you KNOW I love angst.
Anyway this is all speculation give me your own insight if you have any! <:
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aemiron-main · 7 months
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The Two Heads of HNL: Richard and Martin As The Demogorgon
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So, I think that Brenner is the Demogorgon. Specifically, I think that both Richard and Martin are each meant to represent one of the two heads of the Demogorgon in DND. Hell, Richard Brenner is even literally described as the head of the Narcotics Enforcement Division at HNL.
Keep in mind, the Demogorgon in ST is EXTREMELY different from the Demogorgon in DND. Like. Fundamentally different in almost every way.
Let’s go through some key DND Demogorgon lore that you need to know for this post, and I’ll explain why I think Richard and Martin are meant to represent the Demogorgon.
So, when we look at the Demogorgon from DND, there’s some key things to note:
There’s only one of them. The Demogorgon in DND is not a race of creatures, but instead, is A Guy. A demon, to be specific. And he’s not called “The Demogorgon” so much as he’s just called Demogorgon. Demogorgon is more of a name/title. It’d be like saying “The Steve”.
Demogorgon was the Prince of Demons and has a ton of other titles too, including the Deep Father (staring at Brenner being called “Papa” and literally being deep in the sense of working in the depths of HNL/the lower areas of HNL that we see during NINA), the King of the Deviants (staring at Brenner being a creep/a sexual “deviant”), Tanar’ri Prince and Lord of All that Swims in Darkness (staring at Brenner telling El about her getting lose in the darkness when she goes into the water in the NINA tank and El literally swimming in darkness)
Demogorgon is actually two guys- in one body. The Demogorgon has two heads, each with a distinct personality.
Demogorgon’s two heads are named Aeumal, and Hethradiah. Aeumal, the left head, is the more charismatic and calculating while Hethradiah, the right head, is more impulsive and feral. Each head views the other head as inferior and each believes the other incapable of outsmarting it.
Aameul, the more charismatic and calculating head/ personality, loved deception and wanted to break free from the other head. The more impulsive and feral head/personality, Hethradiah, loved destruction and did not want to be separated.
Demogorgon was a scientist who ran experiments with questionable ethics. The Demogorgon/grey skinned creature in ST gets more compared to a bloodthirsty violent alien creature, whereas Demogorgon in DND is an EXTREMELY intelligent scientist and spellcaster known for his experiments. This is JUST like Brenner- intelligent, cruel scientist who runs experiments with questionable ethics??? That’s Brenner.
Demogorgon conducted multiple experiments. He invented retrievers, ettins, khaastas, and he created the first ever Death Knight. He also invented a plague known as scalepox cloud, a series of clouds of disease mist.
And regarding the fact that the DND Demogorgon created the first ever Death Knight, I talked here about how Kas is namedropped in ST4, and El’s bloody has during NINA vs Kas The Bloody Handed and how Kas The Bloody Handed (the Kas who serves Vecna) was actually a false Kas- specifically, Kas the Bloody Handed was a Death Knight who believed himself to be the real Kas but was not.
And Demogorgon was responsible for the creation of Death Knights, and therefore responsible for the creation of Kas the Bloody Handed/the False Kas, which would track with a.) Brenner having “created” El/being responsible for her existence, and b.) possibly with Brenner having created Edward/being responsible for Edward’s existence, as both El and Henward seem to have Kas references surrounding them.
And regarding the DND Demogorgon inventing a mist/cloud plague, I’m staring DIRECTLY at the lab and the shadow particles and how cloudlike the particles are AND how frequently they’re compared to a virus/disease. Especially considering the parallels between the Russian prison and HNL, and the shadow particles trapped in the Russian prison that get released, I won’t be surprised if HNL/Brenner have released shadow particles before/are responsible for their creation, just like how Demogorgon created created the scalepox cloud.
Now that the DND Demogorgon lore and some of its connections to Richard and Martin is established, let’s dig further into the DND Demogorgon versus the ST Demogorgon.
So, if this grey creature-
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-is SO different from the DND Demogorgon in almost every single way, then why does it get called a Demogorgon?
Well, the only reason why the kids call the grey-skinned creature a “Demogorgon” is because El uses the Demogorgon DND piece to represent whatever took Will and then the party sees the grey-skinned creature in the school in the S1 final ep, and assumes that it’s what took Will, and start calling it The Demogorgon as a result.
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And Will confirms that the “Demogorgon” got him, but he doesn’t confirm that the grey-skinned creature is what he’s referring to/calling a Demogorgon. And it doesn’t make any sense for Will to call that creature a Demogorgon because he a.) wasn’t there when El used a Demogorgon figurine to represent whatever took Will and b.) the ST Demogorgon looks NOTHING like a DND Demogorgon.
Now, like I’ve talked about in another old post somewhere, Vecna does, physically, resemble the DND Demogorgon, with his tentacles vs Demogorgon’s tentacles, although Vecna is still lacking the two heads.
But if Vecna is what Will saw/what would make him think of a Demogorgon, then how can Richard and Martin each be a head of the Demogorgon?
Well, as James @henrysglock and Stav @heroesbyler and I have talked about, there’s evidence to indicate that one of the Brenners may have attempted to merge himself (much like the scientist in The Fly, which is on the S4 board multiple times), with one of the Henwards in one of the timelines (in pursuit of immortality via Henward’s regenerative healing), resulting in Vecna, and explaining all of the weird and constant Brenner-Vecna parallells, and explaining how both Vecna and the Brenners can represent the Demogorgon.
And also, even setting all of that aside, we need to keep in mind that Will himself seems to be referring to the party’s DND game, not to his vanishing, as the Demogorgon “got him”/killed his DND character due to his low roll.
Now, that is NOT me saying that this line doesn’t refer to Will’s vanishing at all- it totally does, the subtext is absolutely there. But what I AM saying is that Will likely isn’t actually saying that “the Demogorgon is what physically picked me up and took me,” and instead is referring to his character in DND.
So, if Will is just referring to his DND character and being taken by the Demogorgon in-game, then that still tracks completely with Will having been taken just by Richard and Martin without any Vecna involvement (with Richard and Martin being the Demogorgon), as Will isn’t actually directly telling us/the party anything about who actually kidnapped him, and instead, is talking about his DND game, and the subtext is there for the audience regarding Will’s actual kidnapping.
And, it’s not that the Duffers don’t understand DND lore- it’s that this is intentional.
The Demogorgon in ST looks nothing like a DND Demogorgon- it doesn’t even have two heads. It also doesn’t act like the DND Demogorgon- it’s not a spellcasting demon scientist with two separate heads and personalities. It’s not even close.
In fact, The ST Demogorgon is actually way way WAY more similar to a Doppelganger from DND, both in terms of appearance and behaviour.
Here’s a comparison of the ST Demogorgon vs the DND Doppelganger in terms of appearance:
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And here’s some information about DND Doppelgangers and how they connect to the ST Demogorgon:
DND Doppelgangers are part of classic DND just like DND Demogorgon- so, while I do actually still think that analyzing more recent additions to DND is 100% valid, Doppelgangers in DND were around during the time period of ST/quite awhile before 1983.
Doppelgangers are shapeshifters, able to shapeshift into whoever they can see at the moment. Which, the ST Demogorgon being more closely inspired by a DND Doppelganger makes sense considering how similar the ST Demogorgon is to “The Thing”/the parallels the ST Demogorgon has to The Thing, and the parallels between “It” and the St Demogorgon/how frequently the ST Demogorgon is referred to as “It,” and also how much general shapeshifter imagery is associated with the ST Demogorgon.
Plus, there’s also the whole Vecnagorgon thing and the fact that we see two different Demogorgons in ST- one of them is a CGI Demogorgon that jumps around rapidly and is thinner, the other is a Demogorgon/the Vecnagorgon who is a.) played by a guy in a costume/suit b.) walks upright slowly on both legs c.) seems to regenerate its foot after getting its foot cut off in the trap at the Byers house and d.) grows strange, brief tumors when shot at the Byers house, something that the other Demogorgon does not do. So, this would all tie into some sort of weird shapeshifter stuff being afoot.
Doppelgangers are quick, vicious and violent, and corner their prey and then use brute force to throw them around- the exact same thing that the ST Demogorgon does.
Doppelgangers can replicate somebody’s clothes and personal items/gear too, which has some VERY interesting implications regarding Will standing in front of the “The Thing” poster in Mike’s basement constantly on the night he vanishes, and what I’ve talked about with two different Wills (Warm Will vs Cool Will) and also with the lab somehow replicating Will’s clothes for his dead body- if they had an exact Doppelganger-esque shapeshifted replica of Will who duplicated his clothes, though, and then they put those clothes onto the fake body… and if that Doppelganger-esuqe shapeshifted replica of Will was either Warm Will or Cool Will…. And if this same Doppelganger creature that replicated Will was was also the Vecnagorgon and was actually just something else replicating the appearance of a ST Demogorgon/the CGI Demogorgon/was replicating the one that isn’t the Vecnagorgon….. and if like I talked about here, the Brenner that we saw in S1 was very, VERY likely Richard Brenner, which leaves Martin Brenner free, and if Martin had some sort of shapeshifting abilities somehow… I’m not sure how it all fits togethers, but there’s SOMETHING HERE!!!
And so, while the ST Demogorgon is not similar to a DND Demogorgon, Richard and Martin are EXTREMELY similar to the DND Demogorgon. Sure, they’re both humans and not a twoheaded monkey demonbeast, but they’re both scientists constantly doing experiments with questionable ethics, just like Demogorgon, and Brenner seems to have this Jekyll and Hyde attitude, where he goes back and forth being openly cruel and uncaring versus being more charming- exactly like the two heads of Demogorgon in DND.
Which, Brenner being the Demogorgon/representing the Demogorgon would point to Richard and Martin being the ones who took Will, at least in one timeline, which tracks with the newspaper about Will’s vanishing from the end of S1 which states that Joyce claimed that Will was a subject at Hawkins Lab:
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The former missing child Will Byers has been found after a week of searching. He is presently in stable condition in Hawkins General Hospital. Byers’ mother, Joyce Byers Alleges that Will was the subject of a secret government program run by the Hawkins National Laboratory. The allegation comes amidst a massive investigation into the hidden organization and its elaborate experimentation in perusal of mind control.
The abuse detailed in the first report includes prolonged psychological duress and psychological interrogation. This government sanctioned torture has sparked outrage amongst the American (NOT VISIBLE). In a statement issues yesterday, Ives mentioned her “disgust” (NOT VISIBLE) the organization, saying “our own American people are being treated like the (NOT VISIBLE) we should be directing our attention to the real targets, the Soviets, not our own daughters and sons.” Under legal advice, Brenner has issued no comment on- CUTS OFF
And this would all also align with what I talked about in this post forever ago, with how the hazmat suit figure (likely Brenner) is paralleled to the Demogorgon.
And again, Richard Brenner is described as literally being the head of the Narcotics Enforcement Division at HNL. This wording is not accidental, especially with the context of all of the similarities between Demogorgon and the Brenners- this wording is a reference to the heads of the Demogorgon, and Richard is literally one of the heads of HNL.
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“The lab and its involved in government lead drug experimentation was first brought to the attention of the Post after documents naming Dr Richard Brenner, head of the Narcotic Enforcement Division from 1954-1971 came to light. These documents, although thoroughly coded, point to a secret organization involved in-“
It’s even worded to specifically put him as the head of the Narcotics Enforcement Division- meaning he’s not just put as the sole head of HNL as he’s just head of one specific division. Which is relevant because it leaves room for a second head, aka Martin. Martin and Richard are the two heads of HNL- and the two heads of the Demogorgon.
Which, this also puts them as the demon, considering that Demogorgon was a demon/the prince of demons.
Which, when we look at Victor and the Creel murders and the talk of a demon lurking in his home, it fits eerily well if we were to think of Brenner as the demon.
Take a look at this line, for example:
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Who do we know that canonically takes children? BRENNER!!! And he’s specifically the guy who took Victor’s child/took Henry!!!! And he probably “took” Alice in the sense of being responsible for her death, especially since we never actually see Alice die, and people just assume that Henward killed her!
And this line:
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Who do we know that takes pleasure in tormenting people and children?
Oh right, BRENNER!!! Brenner, the guy staring down with gross pleasure as he tortures a child:
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And look at Henward during that SAME SCENE- he’s clearly disturbed and upset by 002’s torment:
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Brenner, the guy smirking as he tortures Terry and shocks her:
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Even Ray looks more upset/remorseful/as if he's questioning what he's doing, but Brenner just stands there smirking:
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Brenner, the guy who watched without remorse as El cried about Brenner forcing her to kill a cat:
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Brenner, the guy staring with a smile on his face while El stares back terrified:
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Brenner, the guy standing here just WATCHING Henward get tortured, he doesn’t even have to be there, he’s not even there because he has to do the shocking because the other orderlies are doing it, he’s literally just there to watch and take pleasure in it:
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Brenner canonically takes pleasure in tormenting people.
I’m working on some other big posts about this (and mentioned it in this post about the chessboard imagery in the Creel house, and in this post about Victor’s arrest) but I definitely think that HNL and Martin/Richard were surveying the Creels prior to the murders and messing with them and pushing them around like pieces on a chessboard.
This is also supported by the movie Cabin In The Woods, which is on the S4 board, and the cabin in question has DIRECT parallels to the Creel house, but is secretly being controlled and run by a government lab for the purpose of manipulating the people inside of it and making them act out/act violently/act out of character (like they were literally drugging them through the vents).
Long story short, to sum it all up, I think that:
1.) Richard and Martin are meant to represent the two heads of the DND Demogorgon.
2.) The Brenners, in one timeline at the very LEAST, were responsible for Will’s vanishing.
3.) The Brenners are the ones being paralleled to the demon in ST/that the demon imagery ties most closely to them and they were very, very likely messing with and surveying the Creel family prior to the murders.
4.) The ST “Demogorgon” is far more similar to a DND Doppelganger than it is to a DND Demogorgon.
5.) I'm not saying that Brenner is the grey-skinned monster creature. I'm saying that Richard and Martin Brenner, thematically and lore-wise, are FAR FAR FAR more similar to the DND Demogorgon than the ST Demogorgon/grey creature is, and that the creature in question is only called a Demogorgon in the show because El used the Demogorgon DND piece to represent whoever/whatever took Will- and then the boys see the grey creature and assume that it's what took Will.
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