#also the first two 1975 albums were my entire life

[maylorscardigan]

Has matty said anything about his new "t" tattoo?

What's your thoughts on it?

Okay. My thoughts.

I think this is one of those dual meaning tattoos. Hear me out.

First and foremost - it’s a cross with the lines and it is found on the back of the LP version of GY!BE’s debut “F#A#♾️”

Two versions of this record were made. One was an independent project coming from Canada and the other was after they signed to a record company. The LP is the indie version.

Side A is in F# and is regret. Side B is in A# and is desire.

It’s described as: “human beings are in a constant loop of regretting and desiring, preventing us from moving forward” and “we’re trapped in the belly of this horrible machine and the machine is bleeding to death”

The song “dead flag blues” is described as a post apocalyptic wasteland that is slowly being illuminated by the sun rising

The LP as a whole is like a post-rock orchestral piece. It’s also shorter by the CD release by half. The cross on his arm is on the back of the LP. Only 500 or so were ever printed.

When you consider Matty… constant loop of regretting and desiring… feeling like you can’t move forward….

Anyone who has ever had an addiction or knows someone who has had an addiction- you know how that is an endless cycle they feel like they’re in. The analogy of the being trapped in the belly of the machine and the machine is bleeding to death is a good way of describing not only his addictions but his personal experiences with the media and fandom. When combining both meanings… think of it as a symbol of Matty wanting to break that endless cycle and move towards a better future for himself (throwing out the Truman Black jacket, or how his stage persona has changed etc) and finding his way out of the belly of the machine and away from the public perception of who he is.

Then include the meaning behind the first song.

A post apocalyptic wasteland that is slowly being illuminated by by the rising Sun.

The cross is a symbol of that and he is working his way out of his personal apocalypse.

Now - look at the symbol itself. What is it? It’s a cross that is illuminated. The cross itself doesn’t need to be described when it comes to the apocalypse but the illumination is a sign of hope. Of better things. (As Sam said in Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers… “when the sun shines, it’ll shine out the clearer”.) Another way to consider the power of the meaning… for those of us who were alive then… 2001. 9/11. I was in 9th grade and I remember getting the newspaper every day after the attacks to keep informed on it all and one day, on the cover, there was a picture of a cross that was made from the steel beams. The sun was shining down on it. That image has stayed with me my entire life. I’m not religious in any way but it was still a symbolic thing. It now sits at the memory, acting as a symbol. Those at ground zero described it as a symbol of hope and that it gave them a sense of peace.

That whole idea fits into the themes of the LP.

Now all of that - that’s my primary explanation of the tattoo. But I did say that this could be a dual meaning tattoo.

And this is where you enter the garden gates with me.

Like a song… the meaning of it may not always be what it seems at the surface level. As fans of Taylor and the 1975… we know this is the case.

The cross is on his left arm. When you have a heart attack… your left arm often hurts. Why?

The nerves that branch from the heart and those coming from the arm send signals to the same brain cells. Your brain cannot tell the difference between the two so it’s a deferred pain. I got my sons name on my left arm for the reason that it was the arm directly connected to my heart.

But Matty isn’t religious. Why would he have a cross that is connected to his heart. An illuminated one at that? Well - the symbolism is enough of an explanation. He’s got a connection to the album and it has meaning to his life. But this is the garden so we don’t always look at the most obvious.

The fandom went crazy when it was first seen because, like you, we all thought it was a lower case t. I agree that it does - especially since the T is visible facing him. I have another tattoo on my left arm which reads towards me because it’s significant to me. On my other arm I have text written with it going out towards the reader because that’s how it’s meant to be read.

The cross looking like a t facing him is a symbol of the thing in his life that illuminates his life and helps lead him from the personal apocalypse.

Think about how he said “I can’t kiss you in front of Taylor Swift!” And how his behaviour started to shift after things formed more and more between them… how he said things happen in eras and his asshole era was over? How he filmed the announcement for the USA tour not far from where he was staying with Taylor (and rumoured to have moved in) and it was there he threw out the jacket with “Truman Black” on it? Think about how the whole “Still… at their very best” was described.

ATVB was Matty in his single man era. It was meant to tell a story of who he was then but it’s no longer who he is now… and again that video…. The bejeweled Easter eggs… etc etc etc.

Just think about it. It makes sense and is actually one of the sweetest things I can think about.

#that cross tattoo man #rabbit hole #matty healy #the 1975 #maylor #tatty #anon #deeper meanings #tattoos are powerful

[bananaofswifts]

“Speak Now” wasn’t the album that made Taylor Swift a superstar. But it was the first one she made as a superstar.

Two years after she released “Fearless,” which sold more than 10 million copies and won the Grammy Award for album of the year, Swift returned in 2010 with her third studio LP, a dense and sprawling collection of songs about a life — a creative life, a professional life and a romantic life — lived squarely in the spotlight.

Now, amid the blockbuster Eras Tour she’ll bring to Inglewood’s SoFi Stadium next month for half a dozen nights, Swift, 33, has remade “Speak Now” as the latest installment in her plan to rerecord her first six albums.

Here are five takeaways from “Speak Now (Taylor’s Version)”:

1. SHE WROTE ’EM ALL Swift has long been proud of the fact that she wrote all 14 songs on “Speak Now” by herself, and that hasn’t changed in 2023. In an essay that accompanies the LP’s new edition, she writes that, having had her authorship questioned in the past, she “made a decision that would completely define this album: I decided I would write it entirely on my own. I figured, they couldn’t give all the credit to my cowriters if there weren’t any. But that posed a new challenge: It really had to be good. If it wasn’t, I would be proving my critics right.”

Some no doubt remained suspicious that a woman in her late teens had truly composed “Speak Now’s” songs. Yet revisiting the album makes clear she accomplished what she set out to do: Her best songs here represent a high point in her immense catalog, with an emotional and intellectual incisiveness she’s never surpassed.

“You made a rebel of a careless man’s careful daughter,” she sings in the strummy opener, “Mine” — an entire short story in a single lyric. “You held your head like a hero on a history-book page,” she sings in the stately closer, “Long Live” — an image about as vivid as words can convey.

2. SHE RETCONNED A SNIDE LYRIC Though she’s made a virtue of precisely replicating her old albums — the “Taylor’s Version” campaign began, don’t forget, as a way to devalue master recordings she doesn’t own — Swift makes a crucial change in her fresh take on “Better Than Revenge.”

The pop-punk song is a snide takedown of a girl who “steals” the narrator’s boyfriend — a framing that reflects Swift’s mindset at age 19 but that also reveals the institutionalized misogyny in which that mindset was shaped. “She’s not a saint and she’s not what you think / She’s an actress,” Swift sneers in the original. “She’s better known for the things that she does on the mattress.”

On the new “Speak Now,” she swaps out the second of those lines for a less problematic lyric: “He was a moth to the flame / She was holding the matches.” It’s easy to understand why, of course, particularly given the heat Swift faced this year for her evidently short-lived romance with the 1975’s Matty Healy, whose history of demeaning comments regarding women of color led many a Swiftie to question the singer’s professed commitment to a variety of progressive ideals.

But it’s also easy to find some trouble in this attempt by one of the world’s richest and most powerful artists to memory-hole an unflattering moment from her past. What might she retcon next?

3. ‘DEAR JOHN’ REMAINS FANTASTICALLY SAVAGE

A better strategy for recontextualizing old work might be the one Swift deployed during a concert last month in Minneapolis, where she introduced a performance of “Speak Now’s” “Dear John” by assuring her ultra-devoted fans that they don’t “need to defend me on the internet against someone you think I might have written a song about 14 billion years ago.”

Her comments were widely understood to refer to John Mayer, about whom Swift is thought to have written “Dear John,” in which she excoriates an ex for gaslighting a woman “too young to be messed with.” Onstage she insisted she no longer cares about what happened to her when she was 19, which is almost certainly untrue. (The whole point of the “Taylor’s Version” project — the whole point of Taylor Swift — is that the past is always alive.)

Yet by explicitly positioning “Dear John” as a totem of her youth, Swift gave herself a kind of moral leeway to present the song as is on the new “Speak Now.” And thank goodness for that: Thirteen years after the song’s original release, its exacting savagery — “I’m shining like fireworks over your sad, empty town” — is still a thrill to behold.

4. BANJOS! Swift wouldn’t score her first No. 1 single on Billboard’s Hot 100 until “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together,” from 2012’s “Red” — an album for which she consciously adopted the sleek programmed textures of the hitmaking pop producers Max Martin and Shellback.

Given where she’s gone since then, both aesthetically and commercially, it’s fascinating to remember how rooted in hand-played sounds the former country phenom still was on “Speak Now,” which piled on the strings and banjos and acoustic guitars in a year when the Hot 100 was dominated by the likes of Kesha’s “Tik Tok,” Usher’s “OMG,” Katy Perry’s “California Gurls” and Far East Movement’s “Like a G6.”

5. ‘TIMELESS’ LEADS THE OUTTAKES Like Swift’s remakes of “Fearless” and “Red” before it, “Speak Now (Taylor’s Version)” comes with a handful of newly recorded outtakes from her so-called vault. None quite rise to the level of what’s on the album itself, though each provides an intriguing look at where her head was as she was writing.

“Electric Touch” has chugging emo guitars provided in part by Fall Out Boy; “I Can See You” sounds like the Police, of all things. “Castles Crumbling” features Hayley Williams of Paramore (one of Swift’s opening acts on the Eras Tour) and, as produced by Swift and Jack Antonoff, suggests she was into cloistered indie folk years before “Folklore” and “Evermore.”

The best of the vault tracks is “Timeless,” a characteristically detailed fantasy in which the narrator, having come across a box of photos in an antique shop, imagines herself in a series of historical romances. (Fans have decided the tune was inspired by Swift’s grandmother Marjorie, whose name provided the title of a track on “Evermore.”) “Time breaks down your mind and body / Don’t you let it touch your soul,” she sings in the bridge — advice she’s clearly taken to heart.

#taylor swift #speak now tv #review

[freddiemercurylegendabovelegends]

November 21st, 1975 - Queen Story!

'A Night At The Opera' released in the UK

🔸“Bohemian Rhapsody was totally insane, we never stopped laughing. It was basically a joke, but a successful joke.”

- Roy Thomas Baker, Producer

Queen's fourth and probably best known album, was recorded in England between August and November 1975. Such was the complexity of the compositions that no less than six different studios were employed, with the band members often recording various parts simultaneously in order to work most efficiently and get through it all. The sessions were long and gruelling and spanned four long months. Once again the band produced the album with trusted collaborators, Roy Thomas Baker and Mike Stone, and what emerged was a genuine triumph on all levels, meticulously pieced together to make the best possible album. A Night At The Opera would propel Queen on to the world stage on a mammoth scale and establish them as a major international force. Though it was never in any doubt within the band, it proved that Seven Seas Of Rhye and Killer Queen were not fleeting hits from another glam-type British wannabe band; Queen were here to stay and Bohemian Rhapsody and A Night At The Opera would confirm it for those in any doubt.

It is a matter of public record that a very great deal hinged upon the success or failure of this album. Had it failed, it is entirely feasible the band would not have survived and Queen may well have ended there and then. Despite having two top ten albums under their belt, and significant international hits with Seven Seas and Killer Queen, and sell-out shows all around Britain, the band was in serious financial difficulty by the start of 1975. Recording and relentless touring for three solid years had still not yielded anything like what the band were due, and, to add insult to injury, Roger, John, Brian and Freddie were still struggling to get by on the minimal wage from Trident, to whom they were signed. Enter the story at this point, Jim Beach, the lawyer who would eventually negotiate Queen's release from Trident's grasp and from the deal that had so far afforded such little reward for the band. It would be some years before the band formerly parted company with Trident. Eventually Queen were extricated from their deal and left to make A Night At The Opera without distraction or financial pressure. So, with a clean slate and blank canvas on which to create, the much relieved Queen, along with stalwarts Roy Thomas Baker and Mike Stone, committed the next quarter of a year to the meticulous and all-consuming craft of honing the album that Brian would later refer to as ‘Queen's Sgt Peppers’.

The album cover was given a simple but lavish treatment, with Freddie's original crest design updated and coloured and placed centre of the album cover. The LP gatefold complimented the style, with the lyrics printed over two sides of the inside cover, and for the first time the inner sleeve was in colour and featured live photos from Queen’s most recent tour.

A Night At The Opera is a wonderfully rich and diverse gathering of carefully constructed and, some might say, unlikely compositions from all four band members. Every track is strong and every moment from beginning to end is beautifully recorded. The late lamented Mike Stone (engineer), who sadly passed away in 2002, once again played an integral part in achieving the sound of this album. Opera spans all kinds of musical styles and genres and veers off at tangents as unlikely the album title itself.

Aside from the well known material, also on this album is to be found Freddie's exquisite Love Of My Life, rumoured to have been inspired by his long time girlfriend of the time Mary Austin.

A Night At The Opera was finally finished in early November of 1975 and released to worldwide critical acclaim later that month on the 21st. It very quickly became Queen's first No 1 album, and also their first to achieve Platinum sales status. It went top 5 in the USA and achieved Gold status there, helped in no small part by extensive tours of North America and Canada earlier in the year.

Singles from this album: Bohemian Rhapsody / You’re My Best Friend / Death On Two Legs (on Queen’s First EP)

(source: queenonline.com)

Pic: 'A Night At The Opera' – EMI - HOLLAND (2005) ~ 30th Anniversary Edition

#freddie mercury #queen band #london #zanzibar #legend #queen #brian may #john deacon #freddiebulsara #roger taylor #1975 #a night at tbe opera album #a night at the opera tour #queen invite you to a night at the opera #thomas baker

[technetiumai]

Discography Tag

Rules: pick an artist or a band and share your favorite song from each of their albums, then tag some mutuals!

Okay, @onepintobean you asked for it!

YES, I AM DOING RUSH. Obviously. 

me, whenever I’m about to do something like this that’s music related: Rush isn’t even my favorite anymore! It’s just the discography I’m most familiar with!

me, after doing something like this and listening to a bunch of Rush as a result: God, I love Rush so much. They’re the best. Unparalleled in all of history. A+ 👏

Rush (1974): Finding My Way. This one was hard, but only because I don’t like any of the songs much. I mean, no Neil? Come on!

Fly By Night (1975): Beneath, Between, Behind. Also hard, also because I’m not crazy about any of it. They had just hired Neil and just realized he’d be more willing to write lyrics than they were, and they just hadn’t found themselves yet. 

Caress of Steel (1975): The Fountain of Lamneth. NOW they’re finding themselves! I love this song so much.

2112 (1976): 2112. Classic. I talk about it a little more when I talk about  Vapor Trails.

A Farewell to Kings (1977): Cygnus X-1, Book I. I actually always forget which song the Cygnus X-1s are until I start listening to them, especially the first one. But as soon as I start playing them I’m like---Hell yeah.

Hemispheres (1978): Cygnus X-1, Book II---Hell yeah.

Permanent Waves (1980): Natural Science. I think it’s sort of interesting how their more conceptual songs (the extra long ones with several movements etc.) become VERY MUCH not the standard ‘70s prog rock concept song/album like as soon as they crossed into the ‘80s. This song is over 9 minutes long, but it’s nothing like the long ones which pervade the previous albums and tended to tell a literal story which is also a metaphor or exploration of something else (more like operas), whereas this is more of a journey through ideas and feelings (more like a traditional rock song)(although still overtly a metaphor). This is one of my favorite Rush songs, and, when pressed, usually the one I’ll say IS my favorite, though my favorite often changes, and is often whichever one I’m listening to at the moment.

Moving Pictures (1981): Vitals Signs. I’ve just always really loved this song. It’s essentially about change being basically the only thing that life CAN do, to stop changing is to stop living, which seems like one of those things where I’m usually like… well duh, but for some reason it’s very meaningful for me in this song. “A tired mind becomes a shapeshifter” has been one of those lyrics that has really stuck in my head since the very first time I heard it, although I’ve never been entirely sure why. 

Signals (1982): The Weapon. I think maybe Neil Peart is just especially good at saying pretty obvious things in a way that really resonates with me.

Grace Under Pressure (1984): Distant Early Warning. When I’m singing songs to my kids I’m like, “can I sing this one?” and they’re like, “it’s not sad, is it?” and I say “it’s about the potential of nuclear war between the US and Russia, from the perspective of someone in Canada, which is right between the two countries…” and they say “okay, that’s fine.” And I’m like… who am I raising?

Power Windows (1985): Grand Designs. Good shit. “Against the run of the mill, static as it seems, we break the surface tension with our wild, kinetic dreams.” 

Hold Your Fire (1987): Prime Mover. This album is the first one since Caress of Steel with songs that I actively do not like. I do love this song though.

Presto (1989): Chain Lightning. Okay, sometimes I say this is my favorite Rush song. 

Roll the Bones (1991): Bravado. This was pretty hard for me. This album came out the same year I was born, and Roll the Bones was a CD I remember seeing around the house for my entire childhood, and it was the extent of my Rush exposure up until my dad made his torrented Rush road trip mix CD that sent me down the Rush rabbit hole from which I never escaped. So, anyway, even the songs that I’m like… I don’t know if this song is good… I’m still like, it’s my jam, though! I can only speak to it as a person thoroughly brainwashed to love the album, but the whole thing is thoroughly listenable to me.

Counterparts (1993): Leave That Thing Alone. Oddly enough, this album is like the anti-Roll the Bones for me, even though it directly follows it. It was the last of the Rush studio albums I bought (besides the ones that hadn’t come out yet), and I just didn’t really like it. I think there’s a level of cringe/’that didn’t age… great’-ness (and not the nerdy type of cringe, because, arguably there’s a decent amount of cringe in all of Rush), that starts to show up in Hold Your Fire and goes through to Test for Echo, but it really peaks for me in this one. Not that it aged badly, it just is different enough to how we think about things now that it’s kinda like… eh. And I’m 100% talking about the lyrics, I actually really like most of the music (though it sounds... weirdly mixed? to me? or something?). Leave That Thing Alone is the instrumental song on the album and it FUCKING SLAPS! (Counterparts is, btw, often a fan favorite, but Rush fans are often white, cis-het, gen-x men, so…)

Test for Echo (1996): Limbo. Also an instrumental track, although this album is infinitely more listenable to me than Counterparts is. The cringe is all goofier, which I think helps.

Vapor Trails (2002): Secret Touch. This was the most recent album that had come out when I was 13 and discovering Rush, and it’s usually the album that I’ll say is my favorite, when pressed. This one was by far the hardest to choose a favorite from. I changed it several times. My dad’s mixed tape of mostly ‘80s/’90s Rush was what piqued my interest, but when I followed up listening to the first song on 2112 (2112, which is over 20 min long, btw) with listening to One Little Victory from Vapor Trails (even just the first like… three seconds of the song), I was absolutely hooked! I bought 2112 and Vapor Trails because they were the only Rush albums at Best Buy that weren’t compilations, and---boy! Am I glad that was the case! This crazy, weird, almost orchestral, but only three people playing, amazing, ‘70s sci-fi journey that was 2112, then this intense drum solo and heavy rock song, which both sounded so different from each other, but even more different from everything my dad had played of Rush, which would have been created between those two albums. I was absolutely obsessed.

Snakes & Arrows (2007): Hope. This one’s one of the three instrumental songs (which are all amazing), but this time not because I don’t like the lyrics of the rest of the album, just because it’s great. It’s actually just Alex playing the guitar, which is very strange for them, but it’s beautiful. Snake’s and Arrows was my first real ‘A band I love and have made a part of my identity is coming out with a new album!’ experience, and it was so much fun. I had two teachers at the time, who were also fans, to bond over it with, and my dad was also super psyched. Rush was the first concert I ever went to (R40 in 2004), and I went to two more on the Snakes and Arrows tour, and two more on the tour after that (Time Machine, 2010-2011). Besides that I’ve only ever been to one Panic! At the Disco concert for my sister’s Birthday (2008?), which was really more like just a really bad party… like all of the worst parts of a school dance and a house party (it was at a weirdly small “ballroom”), and the band wasn’t even playing well---it sucked. and a U2 concert (2018). That concert was actually so good, though. People can say whatever they want about U2, but that was a fucking amazing show. (10/10, would recommend, would go again at any and all opportunities.) (But there will never be another Rush OR U2 concert with all of the members there again, because ALL OF MY DRUMMERS ARE BREAKING!) (Larry’s not dead, he just has drummer related health issues.) (I was all alone contracting in Maine when Neil Peart died. Like, I didn’t have anyone I knew to talk to in person about anything, let alone this thing that was very sad for me, but was a relatively niche interest.)

Clockwork Angels (2012) BU2B. The music started slipping for me a tiny bit with Snakes and Arrows, or maybe… the music and vocals together? I think mostly the music… But it’s even more extreme in this album. I think it’s just like A LOT for me. And I’m a Rush fan, so… The book that was written based on this story was fun, and I respect what they were trying to do with the album, but I almost never just go and listen to this album or any of the songs. Except sometimes BU2B, I actually do think that’s a pretty good song---I think the name just bothers me.

I have no idea who would bother to read all that, but it was fun to do! I made a playlist of these songs, and a playlist of my least favorite song from each album, and it was really interesting. 

My cat died yesterday morning, and I had to just keep going; I had to go to work, do all the normal stuff, but I was really sad. She’s been around for way more of my life than not, especially the parts of my life I can remember, and she lived twice as long as her breed’s expectancy. Which is a cold comfort, considering how much more of me she carried with her because of all that extra time. She was there when I started high school, there for every break up I’ve ever had, my parents divorce, that time my husband and I lived in a three bedroom house with nine other people, a couple other cats, and a dog. When I joined the Navy, when my kids were born... And she was so very her up to the very end.

Anyway, this was a welcome distraction as I kept trying not to openly weep (and give myself a migraine) (which I did) all night at work. 

I haven’t actually checked Tumblr, so I don’t know who else has done this:

@raenestee @cutestkilla @captain-aralias @ivelovedhimthroughworse @fatalfangirl 

#tag game

[justlana3]

Playlist of My Life

GIF by nuooage

1. Money Trees - Kendrick Lamar

This song reminds me of summer break. I remember one time my cousins and I were driving home at sunset after spending the whole day at Canada’s wonderland and this song was blasting in the car and we would rap along. It was one of the happiest days of my life.

2. Paris, Texas - Lana Del Rey

Lana Del Rey changed my life when I first started listening to her two years ago. Her music showed me the importance of lyricism and the beauty of sadness. Her music fills you with emotion and reminds you that it’s okay to be sad. I always listen to her music when I’m feeling down. This song specifically is off her newest album and I’ve been listening to it on repeat.

3. The Great Gig in the Sky - Pink Floyd

The Dark Side of The Moon is considered to be one of the best albums of all time. The first time I listened to it I felt like I was having an epiphany. This album introduced me to 70s' rock and to other 70s' influences like Deftones, the Sex Pistols, and David Bowie. This album also showed me that you don't need lyrics to make a song, the songs being mostly everyday sounds like the sound of clocks or the sounds of cash registers as well as just instruments. That is why this is my favourite song on the album, I feel euphoric listening to the notes even though there are barely any lyrics.

4. Lean On - DJ Snake, Major Lazer, MO

This song correlates with a happy memory. In middle school as our end of the year trip the entire sixth grade went to Centre Island for the day. That trip was the most fun I’d ever had. My friends and I went on this ride that span around in this dark room with flashing lights and large speakers that blasted music. This is the song that played when me and my friends went on. I remember we screamed at the top of our lungs the lyrics and we could hardly speak when we got off. This song reminds of being young and having no worries in the world. Now as I’m older, I feel nostalgic every time I hear this song play.

5. About You - The 1975

I remember my best friend and I were standing in front of our locker one day last year and I was singing the lyrics to this song. She started singing it along with me and we were both shocked that the other knew this band and this song. We bonded over our shared love for this band. We made plans to save all our money and go to their concert one day when we were older.

[ryukyuan-sunflower]

Romance in Samurai Champloo: The Mirror Reflection of Jin and Shino and Mugen and Fuu

Upon re-watching Episode 11, I was utterly shocked by how many parallels exist between Mugen and Jin as characters, in regards to their relationship with the most important women of their journey. The interactions and concepts are near identical. These specific themes and interactions were only exhibited with two specific women, and no other characters in the series.

In episode 11, Jin falls in love with Shino: a courtesan who was forced into prostitution due to her lousy, abusive husband's gambling debt. Jin later saves Shino from this brothel, and helps her escape to a divorce temple.

Canonically, it was stated in the Samurai Champloo Roman Album by Shino’s character designer that Jin does indeed "fall for" her, so it was not simply chivalry that led him to help her. This echoes his actual dialogue in episode 11:

Fuu: I understand why you pity her but-

Jin: It’s not pity.

It is not pity, because it is love.

So, here is the INSANE number of ways Jin's confirmed romantic dynamic with Shino is an uncanny mirror to Mugen's subtle romantic dynamic with Fuu.

Warning: There is a LOT of comparisons. I was honestly so surprised and have a whole new level of respect for this anime now, and specifically Episode 11.

Enjoy the read!

The First Meeting: Saving the Girl and Reading Her Mind

Both Mugen and Jin save a woman’s life at their first encounter. Both also know the girl is in trouble without ever being told.

Both Fuu and Shino reject the notion that they need help. But it is revealed later that they do.

Jin meets Shino on a bridge and saves her life. She confesses much later, that she had been contemplating suicide, but because he stopped to talk with her, she did not go through with it. 

Never did Shino ever show any indication she wanted to drown herself, other than looking at the canal. Jin just knew the moment he walked by.

Mugen meets Fuu in the tea house and saves her life. The magistrate's son was going to have her mutilated and killed. But because Mugen talked with her, she was able to strike a deal of killing them for 100 dumplings.

Never did Fuu tell Mugen that the guys were giving her trouble. Mugen just knew the moment he walked in.

In addition to this first meeting, Jin also stops Shino’s husband from beating her. Mugen also stops Umanousuke from beating Fuu in Episode 25.

Thinking in the Rain: Love Interest Trapped in a Brothel

Previously, in Episodes 3+4, Fuu was thrown into a brothel, just like Shino's predicament in episode 11.

After Mugen skips town and ditches the Yakuza, the thought of Fuu stuck in the brothel invades his mind, and compels him to turn back.

Note: Jin never thinks about Fuu stuck in the brothel.

After being unable to afford Shino, Jin is beaten by bouncers and trudges away, thinking about how Shino is sleeping with another man.

Both of these incidences occur during heavy rain. 

Both think about their love interests trapped in the brothel which leads them to return to save them.

The Brothel Escape.

Both Mugen and Jin attempt to break their love interests out of a brothel.

On the second night they spend together, Jin concocts a plan to sneak Shino out of the brothel.

Never one to be discrete, Mugen’s plan to save Fuu involves breaking into the brothel, kicking open the cage doors, and pulling her out. However, to keep the MugenxFuu romance subtle and to have shippers rip their hair out Fuu escapes alone, and she never finds out about Mugen’s wild attempt to get her back. So, we never get the obviously romantic scene of him grabbing her arm and whisking her away. We just know that poor Mugen tried.

There is evident blood on his sword. He killed a person or multiple people to get back to her.

Mugen could have taken and freed any of these lovely ladies. But no.

Note: Jin is seen putting no effort into saving Fuu at all. When Jin initially sneaks into the brothel of Episode 3+4 disguised as a woman, he had no idea Fuu was there at the time. He was just helping the boy Sousuke save Osuzu. Later, even when he sees Fuu there, Jin never is shown putting in any effort to rescue her, nor thinking about it. If we assume he intended to, with his roundabout way of being involved with the Kawara gang, (who he was already helping anyway), Fuu would have already been bought by a client, because she was. (luckily the client did not have sex with her). 

If this isn't enough of a mirror, Fuu and Shino escape the brothel in the exact same way: tying a series of clothes to the porch and sliding out the window.

Giving Up One’s Sword For a Woman

Shown in both episodes 6 and 8, Jin is extremely protective of his katana, saying that his swords are the equivalent of his soul as a samurai. 

He adamantly refuses to part with them for any reason. He is also shown in episodes 14, 16 and 20 diligently polishing them.

On a different note, Mugen is not shown taking care of his swords as meticulously as Jin, nor as protectively. He is willing to pawn them off if it means being able to eat: shown in episode 6 and episode 8.

But his sword is no less important to Mugen, as he is shown carrying the same sai handled tsurugi in his flashbacks in the Ryukyuan Islands, implying he had carried it for a long time. For Mugen, the sword has nothing to do with some code of bushido, or philosophy. It serves the fundamental purpose of keeping him alive, which is something Mugen constantly struggles with.

In a brothel, swords are not allowed, as it is unsafe for the courtesans if there happened to be a violent client. 

In Episode 25, Umanousuke is about to kill Fuu when Mugen arrives.

To spend time with Shino and free her, Jin willingly gives up his swords.

To save Fuu’s life and free her, Mugen gives up his sword in Episode 25.

Note: The only other example we have of Jin “giving up his swords” is comedy when Mugen and Fuu confiscates his swords against his will, so they can enter an eating contest in Episode 6.

Interestingly, the two men gave up their swords under reversed circumstances, yet with the same intentions.

Jin, who has always cherished his katana, ends up giving them up in a moment that he logically "shouldn't". He does what could be considered a frivolous activity of spending time with a prostitute, which completely goes against his personal code as a samurai.

Mugen, who had always been willing to give up his sword for the sake of survival, finally needs to keep his sword, or he will be brutally tortured and killed by Umanousuke. But instead, he gives it up anyway in this extremely critical moment, to save Fuu's life.

In the end, both men resorted to giving up their swords for one simple reason: love.

Red and Pink Color Composition

This one was very surprising for me, and the reason I ended up writing this entire post. The other examples until now are more obvious. But this? Mugen and Fuu's main colors are obviously red and pink. But...Jin and Shino?

Shino’s kimono color is light green, with a dark green collar. Jin’s color is dark blue.

However, when Shino is put in the brothel and takes on the name “Kohana”, she is seen throughout the majority of the episode wearing pink, with a burgundy collar. This is exactly Fuu’s kimono colors, and no other character in the series wears these colors that I can recall.

More interesting, is Shino’s brothel name becomes “Kohana”. 

Kohana means “Flower Child”. 

Fuu is the child of the “Sunflower Samurai”. 

For the first time, I was suddenly faced with a serious question of "Was this name choice and kimono color put as a symbolism of Jin choosing to buy a woman that resembled Fuu?" And in turn, would this be one solid way to disprove so much that I've always thought and written about Jin being the father figure to Fuu?

But, then I noticed something else.

Shino only wears this pink and burgundy kimono in the brothel. It is not her true outfit. 

And it is not only her who gets a "change" in appearance. Jin does too, in a sense. He gets an addition to his ensemble, only for this particular episode.

Every time Jin visits Shino in pink, he carries a bright red umbrella. Whenever she is in green, he does not have the umbrella. He visits her on four separate occasions when she’s a courtesan, always with the umbrella in tow.

The red umbrella is visually striking, as the atmosphere of this episode is particularly drab due to the rainfall.

The red umbrella becomes the connection between Jin and Shino during her stay in the brothel. It is significant, because it was initially hers, and was a gift to him since she had no use for it in the brothel anymore.

One can argue, “It’s raining and he just needed an umbrella.” But during his depressing walk, he carries it, but doesn't even use it, and we don’t even get to see it or its striking red color. (Which I will explain my interpretation as to why shortly).

We only know he’s holding it, because he continues to have it afterwards.

It is far more a symbol of his connection to her, than for practical use. Watching the episode, everyone else has drab brown and gray umbrellas. Even in Episode 4, Jin donned a drab brown umbrella.

In Japanese culture, red is famously the color that represents the “main character”. This is extremely common in many anime and video games, and particularly shown in the Super Sentai genre, in which every season since 1975 to present, the main character always dons red.

In the case of Samurai Champloo as well, Mugen is confirmed to be the “main character”, first developed by Shinichiro Watanabe, with Jin created later as his foil so the story did not become “one dimensional”, as he said. This is why most episodes focus on Mugen. 

Episode 11 is the very first episode that focuses on Jin. Up until this point, Jin was never a rescuer. (He doesn’t even rescue Fuu until Episode 26).

With Shino, he finally fulfills the "noble hero saving the maiden" role.

More interesting, is the scene where the brothel bouncers attack Jin, who intentionally decides not to fight back. Jin loses his grip on the umbrella. This is my personal interpretation, but I think this could be a representation that Jin could not protect Shino, as she is forced to have sex moments later.

If it were Mugen being attacked, he would kill the men, repercussions or not, just as he did to the Yakuza in Episode 4. Mugen will always embody the “passionate red” that he wears.

But it does not suit Jin. He has chosen the lawful path, unlike Mugen’s chaotic nature of killing whoever stands in his way. Jin does not kill these men, since he has no reasonable cause, and does not risk the repercussions. It is his own fault, not theirs, that he can’t purchase or protect Shino.

In this scene, he not only drops the red umbrella, but Shino also drops her pink robes when she is undressed. They are not red and pink: they are not Mugen and Fuu. They are back to the cruel reality of being a different, more tragic tale of love in which he can’t protect her.

One of the attackers even picks up the umbrella, and throws it at him, as if to add more injury to insult in his failure.

In the ending of the episode, Shino no longer wears pink and burgundy, and is back in her original green kimono. Interestingly, Jin stops using this red umbrella at the exact same point she is back in green. 

Since Shino is no longer a “maiden in distress in pink”, Jin no longer needs to be the “hero in red”. They no longer have to play this role. Their episode is at its close. The anime will return to Mugen and Fuu carrying out the dynamic of “hero and maiden”. 

Jin will once again, play the role as the cool and collected “rival in blue” that foils the main protagonist.

One could still argue these color choices of red and pink were random and thoughtless. They very well could be. But, this is a Watanabe work, and colors often hold surprising symbolism in the anime he directs.

As a more solid example of color symbolism: here is a link to a fascinating video that reveals just how intentional the color palette is in Samurai Champloo's Episode 14. The choice of Mukuro's yellow versus Mugen's red and the episode ending on Koza in gray was all deliberate and was repeatedly shown in the episode's composition through various means, to subtly convey the story.

Flashing the Coin and “Buying”a Woman

Jin is shown to be the character who makes/finds money for the group the most. Even in this episode, he was working for the eel stand. Mugen meanwhile, makes money and spends it selfishly. But in this episode, it is Mugen making the money and Jin demanding it for a selfish purpose, reversing their roles once again. Jin is the main character now, and Mugen the foil.

Mugen flaunts the coin he made to impress Fuu, demanding her validation by tapping her head.

Jin flaunts the same exact coin (Mugen gave it to him), in a very similar way, to show he’s buying Shino.

Both men, in essence, are "buying time with a woman".

While Jin is, in a literal sense, using the money to purchase a prostitute, Mugen's is more figurative.

Mugen gives the money to Jin, causing him to go away, and leaving him and Fuu alone. Once Jin is back, they will once again be a trio, and the “pairing dynamic” between them will be shattered. But for that brief night, Mugen got time with Fuu.

Mugen, despite acting like he detests Fuu's company, does some very strange and completely uncharacteristic things in this episode. For one...he is the one to bring Fuu to the beetle wrestling match. Her dialogue implies she didn't want to go and Mugen dragged her along.

Then, despite being all stingy about the money with Fuu, he willingly gives the money to Jin to send him away to go to a brothel. For a man Mugen claims to despise, this is a remarkably thoughtful act. Especially when he said he was going to use the money to buy seeds to make more in beetle wrestling. Strangest of all, Mugen doesn't use the money himself for a prostitute. He chooses to stay at an inn, alone with Fuu, rather than the prospect of going to the brothel in town, even when he’s repeatedly shown being a womanizer.

I think this act shows both his selfish desire to spend time with Fuu alone, but also his selfless care for Jin as a friend. He killed two birds with one stone. In both cases, these are things Mugen would never admit to his companions.

With the exchange of that on koban coin between them, both Mugen and Jin have "bought time" with their respective love interests.

Helping to Save Each Other's Love Interest.

In every episode Fuu gets into trouble, Mugen is the one who saves Fuu, if she isn’t saving herself. Jin does not. But there is one exception to this: Episode 26. Jin saves Fuu for the first time, in the one moment Mugen can't, while also simultaneously avenging his father figure Mariya Enshirou.

In episode 11, Jin does not have his swords on him. But Mugen and Fuu arrive. Mugen cuts down many men to help them escape. And in addition, he knocks down a man right in front of Shino that Jin failed to incapacitate, before telling Jin “You’re pathetic!”

The Windowsill and the Mirror in the Same Room

This one is a very, VERY minor comparison, so don’t take this one seriously. I just thought the imagery was similar.

In Episode 18, where Mugen attempts to win Fuu in a tagging contest (yes, that was actually the plot: Here's a Post About It), Mugen and Fuu spend a small moment in the inn room alone.

In this inn room, Fuu is looking at herself in the mirror, when Mugen appears behind her. 

Their faces are wonderful.

In the brothel room, Shino also looks in the mirror, when Jin is shown behind her.

Alone with their love interests, they sit on windowsills. 

Again, very, very minor and I highly doubt it was intentional. But there is no other moment of window sill sitting that I can recall.

There is one other gazing into a mirror though: the end credits of Fuu and her mother. This relates her mother to Shino, aside from the fact that they have the same exact hair and wear green kimonos, and who are in love with a poor samurai who ends up wearing gray.

Parting Ways

In the defining moment of Jin and Shino parting, there is a distance of water separating them. But Jin must let her go to the temple to be free of the marriage: her final goal.

In the defining moment of Mugen and Fuu parting, a distance of the Church with Umanousuke is in the way, separating them. But Mugen tells her to go see her Sunflower Samurai: her final goal.

Neither Jin and Shino or Mugen and Fuu are allowed to touch or to embrace before this forced goodbye.

Jin is the one to push the boat away, even when Shino tries to reach out to him.

Mugen is the one who urges Fuu to run, even when Fuu hesitates and wants to stay.

Both Shino and Fuu are reluctant to leave Jin and Mugen behind.

Mugen and Jin remain stoic, even when their emotions must be running wild.

Fuu and Shino’s eyes well up, until they are unable to hold in the tears.

“The Love Triangle” Dilemma: A Lousy Gambler, A Noble Samurai and a Pure Maiden

Now, I am not saying that Mugen, Fuu and Jin is an actual love triangle. I firmly believe it isn't, as I have shown the evidence of the two romances above.

But I believe in Mugen's mind, there is a love triangle, and he’s the odd one out.

Yes, there is a sense that Fuu has insecurity about Jin's abandonment and is jealous of his attention to Shino. Personally though, I think this is in more relation to her father's abandonment, as Jin and Shino strikingly resemble Fuu's father and mother. Jin even gets Fuu’s father’s kimono in Episode 26, and likely his katana too, as his were broken.

But that aside, the relationship dynamics going on in Episode 11 are painfully satirical.

Shino, her husband, and Jin are an ugly representation of Fuu, Mugen, and Jin.

Jin is interfering with both of these "couples".

Shino's husband is an avid gambler, who fell into debt, causing her to be thrown into prostitution. It is no coincidence that Mugen is avidly gambling throughout this episode, and being chastised by Fuu. 

Fuu’s words to Mugen are Shino’s words to her husband.

Mugen is being portrayed as the "lesser man", lacking in morals, while Jin takes on the mantle of the “gallant knight”. This again relates to the earlier concept that Jin has for the first time assumed the position as the “main character”.

This is likely why they chose “Gamblers and Gallantry” as the English title for Episode 11. Note that Gamblers is plural. (Also, the original Japanese title is Fallen Angel).

Fuu’s “jealousy” in this episode is used in the narrative to make Mugen believe she loves Jin, and not him. We see this again, in Episode 20. The one and only time Fuu cries for Jin is comical, compared to her over five emotional times for Mugen, still causes Mugen to stomp off with jealousy and annoyance.

Our first indicator of Mugen harboring jealousy of Jin stems from Episode 11 and piles up more as the show goes on.

There is three separate implied occasions in this specific episode 11.

1. Mugen states that Fuu is jealous that Jin is seeing Shino. But when he says this, it is him to roll over away from her. It is almost a blatant indicator that he is sulking. Then, he feigns sleeping and snoring.

We know his sleeping is fake because upon closer inspection....

His eyes are open and his eyebrows are furled angrily. This “faking sleep” is a trick he repeats three times total in the anime, always concerning Jin and Fuu.

2. When Fuu gets upset at Jin about leaving the group for good, Mugen pretends to sleep yet again, but was listening to the whole thing.

His facial expression is almost sad looking here. Very uncharacteristic indeed.

Note: The very last time Mugen pretends to sleep, is Episode 24, when Fuu hugs Jin on the riverbank. It appears here, that Mugen didn't hear or understand what they were talking quietly about. The dialogue is hard to interpret but it seems Fuu rejected Jin’s dutiful offer to stay with her after the journey close. She seems to confide her feelings for Mugen to Jin in this extremely subtle scene, by mentioning him out of the blue, crying, and then apologizing to Jin for it. Rather than embrace Fuu romantically, Jin comforts her with a hand upon her shoulder, in an understanding that is, by my interpretation, very fatherly.

3. Back to Episode 11, when Fuu decides to help Jin, despite being angry at him for abandoning them, Mugen says some telling dialogue. This scene, Mugen and Fuu are running through town together, just as Jin and Shino are.

If Mugen only stuck around solely to kill Jin, then this exchange makes one question why is he still hanging around Fuu. We also know Mugen was listening the whole time when Jin states "If I don’t return, I want you two to continue your journey without me." It is as if he's trying to convince Fuu to be "over" with Jin.

But this isn't the only time Mugen is fine with taking Fuu to find the sunflower samurai alone. Mugen also agrees to travel with Fuu in ep 21 alone, when they think Jin is leaving for good with Sara, and makes no indication of leaving her to do battle with Jin.

Despite all the jealousy of Jin, and all the intentional comparison that Mugen bears with Shino's husband, we know Mugen is not actually like Shino's husband at all. 

On the surface, perhaps, he seemed like an irresponsible, lawless lecher who frivolously wastes money. But in actuality, he is honorable and deeply cares about Fuu, saving her and worrying about her in every single episode something bad befalls her.. Mugen does more noble deeds for Fuu than Jin ever does. 

While “Gamblers” apply to Mugen and Shino’s husband, the “Gallantry” applies to Mugen and Jin just as much. 

That is why, unlike Shino’s husband, Mugen wins in gambling. And that is why, despite making money gambling, he generously gave it all to Jin.

The secretly gallant character of this episode was Mugen. Had he not given/borrowed this money to Jin, Jin would have never been able to save Shino at all.

How the Relationships Differ

While these comparisons highlight that Jin and Shino is equivalent to Mugen and Fuu, there are some directly opposite characteristics as well. Just as Mugen and Jin are opposite.

Jin and Shino are calm and quiet.  Mugen and Fuu are passionate and loud.

Jin and Shino wear cold colors of green and blue, while Mugen and Fuu don warm colors of red and pink.

Shino is older than Jin. Fuu is younger than Mugen.

While Shino is forced to give herself to men and Jin can’t save her, Fuu is saved from this fate many times by Mugen.

Mugen and Fuu spend an entire, long journey together. Jin and Shino’s time together is fleeting. Mugen and Fuu appear together every episode. Jin and Shino only get one.

Ironically, Jin and Shino consummate their love in this short time, while Mugen and Fuu do not.

The relationships are remarkably the same story but from opposite ends of a spectrum.

Conclusion 

Mugen and Jin may be opposites, but they are also like Yin and Yang. Both characters are a duality of one another, possessing opposite traits in their appearances and attitudes, and yet bearing similar beliefs and morals. In the love department, it turns out that they are also two sides of the very same coin.

After discovering the parallels between these two romances, I was utterly blown away. This concept of duality is the entire point of Mugen and Jin’s dynamic in every other sense.

The love they bore for Fuu and Shino highlighted this concept in another new, astonishing way.

Mugen and Jin both bear something else in common. Even though Jin and Shino is far more an obvious romance due to the sexual consummation of the coupling, Jin and Mugen still relate in one way: they never directly express their love for Shino or Fuu words.

Jin comes off as “old fashioned” with his “I hope that the rain will never stop so I can stay here forever.”, Mugen comes off as “unromantic” by never saying kind and romantic words to Fuu. Their love was wholly expressed through action. Words are unneeded.

Finally, even though Jin and Shino part ways, and even though Mugen and Fuu (and Jin) part in the finale, hope still exists that they will meet again someday. 

Both tales of love do not have tragic endings, but neither does either obtain closure. Their hopeful future is left up to you, the viewer, to determine.

Perhaps, their reunions with their loved one, will be a mirror too.

#samurai champloo #fuugen #jin samurai champloo #mugen samurai champloo #fuu samurai champloo

[frankiefellinlove]

THE STEVIE FILES PROUDLY PRESENTS - THE AMAZING ROCK & ROLL ODYSSEY OF STEVEN VAN ZANDT

From The Source to Soulfire via Springsteen and Sam & Dave

Recorded, transcribed, edited, written, produced, mixed and mastered by MIKE SAUNDERS

SIDE TWO (1975-1983)

Track 6: Miami Steve, The Asbury Jukes, Tenth Avenue and Hammersmith

In early 1975, Steven returned to New Jersey from Florida, inappropriately dressed for the winter weather. “I came back with the flowered shirts and the Sam Snead hat and continued wearing them in the snow.” For the next seven years, he was known as Miami Steve. He joined Southside in the Blackberry Booze Band and within weeks they’d altered and expanded its line-up (adding keyboard player Kevin Kavanaugh from Middletown and bass player Alan Berger from The Dovells’ backing band), transformed its musical direction, changed its name to Southside Johnny and the Asbury Jukes (referencing their mutual hero Little Walter’s band and first single release) and established a successful three-nights-a-week, five-sets-a-night residency at the Stone Pony in Asbury Park.

“Just before that, me, Southside, Bruce and Garry went to see Sam & Dave. A life-changing moment. So me and Southside basically decided we were gonna be the white Sam & Dave, with rock guitar. So the horns came in and although we didn’t know it, we would change the entire concept of what a bar band sounded like and the respect a bar band would get by making it creative, soul meets rock. ‘Bar band’ was an insult. ‘You’re a bar band,’ which means you can’t make it in the real music world. After the Jukes, they started using ‘bar band’ in reviews and they meant it as a compliment, with Graham Parker and Elvis Costello and Mink DeVille. We changed the way people thought about these things.”

The Miami Horns were a vital component of the new band. Steven composed the horn arrangements, but although he’s always possessed a natural ability to imagine horn parts, he doesn’t read or write music (“never have”) and has always required a little help from his friends to transcribe them. “I have people write ‘em down, to this day. I like that actually. You have to do a lotta things yourself so any excuse I find to collaborate I do it. I find other people will bring something to the party usually. That’s why [I’ve] used Eddie Manion for I don’t know how many years. He knows how I like to voice things. Once I think of something and create the parts, I get bored if I have to voice every part, exactly right. If I hear a voicing I don’t like, I will change it, but I get bored by the mechanics of everything.”

While the Jukes were building their reputation and growing their audience, Bruce invited Steven to hang out at the Born To Run sessions in New York, where he was working on “Tenth Avenue Freeze-Out.” David Sanborn and The Brecker Brothers had been hired to play the horn parts, but Steven created a spontaneous new arrangement. He’s told this anecdote countless times, but I ask him to repeat it because it provides perfect examples of his innate musical talents in action (“I can hear the parts, who knows why?”), the nature of his friendship with Bruce (“I still am the only human being not afraid of him”), and his no-bullshit attitude (“I didn’t know anything about diplomacy”).

“So he says, ‘Whaddya think?’ I said, ‘It sucks, that’s what I think!’ I didn’t know how uptight everybody was. I didn’t give a fuck either. The managers and producers were all afraid of him already. He asked me a question, I’m gonna be honest. I’m trying to help my friend here, not make points with some fucking record company guy. Moment of silence. ‘He just said it sucks, which means we all suck.’ Bruce [says] ‘Alright then, go in and fucking fix it.’ So I did. I went in and sang the [new] parts. I didn’t know they were the most famous [session] guys in New York. It wasn’t insulting them, the chart was ridiculous. That was my thing, just from the Jukes being around maybe six months.”

“I wasn’t really feeling the pressure that Bruce was at the time. I didn’t realise his life depended on this album. His first two records hadn’t done very well. They wanted to drop him. I don’t know how aware I was of any of that. He invited me into the session and I’m laying on the floor. All I can think is, we’ve been hoping to get into recording our whole lives, I’m listening to this and it sounds fucking terrible. Not just the horn charts, everything. It was the worst period of recording in history. Virtually every record from the 50s and 60s sounded great, virtually every record from the early 70s sounded terrible. Because engineers took over, started close miking, padding the walls. Separation, separation, separation, all the things that make rock ‘n’ roll suck. The idea was, you isolate everything and make it sound exciting in the mix. Which they managed to do, miraculously, with the Born To Run album. Because it was pieced together in a bizarre way. Bruce made that record 100% out of willpower, he willed that into existence!”

Soon after making his instinctive artistic contribution (and singing backing vocals on “Thunder Road”), Steven was invited to join the E Street Band. It was a chance to complete the circle, play with his old friend again and settle any unfinished business from three summers earlier, when he’d been sent packing at the Greetings sessions. He made his live debut on the opening night of the Born To Run tour, which ran until New Year’s Eve. His input and influence over the next decade, onstage and off, would prove invaluable. (Bruce even began playing The Dovells’ “You Can’t Sit Down” as an occasional encore). In the fall, the tour took everyone to Europe for the first time, where the culture shock was off the charts. “There was no hamburgers, no peanut butter. The only place you could get a hamburger in the whole of Europe was the newly-opened first Hard Rock Café. There was a line around the block even then.”

Culinary deficiencies aside, Bruce also had to endure the overblown hype surrounding his first UK gigs at London’s Hammersmith Odeon, where Columbia had displayed the legend “Finally London Is Ready For Bruce Springsteen” on every available surface prior to his arrival. “[It was] completely obnoxious,” says Steven. “[Bruce] spent half the time ripping down posters. It was an embarrassing time for him, between that and Time and Newsweek. He didn’t like that stuff. You wanna be in charge of your life, that’s why we get into rock ‘n’ roll. Suddenly it was slipping out of his control. We made the mistake of playing a place with seats. It just made the show that much harder. But by the end, we got ‘em outta the seats. We went to Amsterdam, Stockholm, and back to London. The second one was a bit easier.” The experience had a prolonged effect on Bruce. “He was uptight in those days and would remain so through Darkness into The River, until he asked me to produce the record and we found a way to have some fun.”

Track 7: Epic Records, Steve Popovich and The Stone Pony

Back on the shore, Southside Johnny and the Asbury Jukes continued the Stone Pony residency throughout 1975, gradually consolidating their line-up. For the next three years, between Springsteen commitments, Steven worked as their producer, arranger, manager, part-time guitarist and principal songwriter. In early 1976, after circulating a demo tape, they signed a recording deal with Epic, with assistance from Steve Popovich, the label’s Vice-President of A&R. “I Don’t Want To Go Home,” the song that Steven had kept in his back pocket since his days on the oldies circuit, became the title track of their debut album and their first single. Ben E King’s loss was Southside’s gain.

“I produced [the song] in a way which was appropriate for the Jukes. They didn’t have a big background vocal thing going on,” explains Steven. “I was very conscious of being able to try and do most of it live, although I put strings on it, on my very first production! There was no synthesiser in those days that could play strings. That’s why I re-cut it [on Soulfire] the original way I pictured it, with the singer and background vocals answering. That idea of writing for someone else is extremely important, critical and essential. It changes the way you write completely, from when you think of writing for yourself, which is extraordinarily complicated and confusing. It’s not easy, but easier, to write for someone else. There’s their identity in your mind at least. I’m writing them a song. That’s a wonderful exercise for songwriters.” I Don’t Want To Go Home was released in the summer of 1976 (“I’ve never received one penny of royalties, but whatever!”). The Jukes later began their first national tour and made their European debut in 1977.

Recommended by Bruce, Steve Popovich was one of a kind. “The last of the real music guys in the business. The only other person I can compare him to would be Lance Freed on the publishing side, who’s unique. He’s actually into music and songwriting and the things you’re supposed to be into when you have a job description like that. And Frank Barsalona, the only agent who really did his job and would set the standard for everybody to follow. Those three guys, really quite historic. [It was] Popovich’s idea to launch the record with a broadcast from the Stone Pony. Never been done before. Popovich loved the local scene idea and he largely made it happen. It never would have been recognised nationally, I don’t think, if it hadn’t been for Popovich, who had the vision to say it’s cool if you’re not from New York. Rather than being embarrassed if you’re not from New York, LA or Nashville, it’s actually cool.”

Track 8: Production Credits and Political Awakening

Steven developed his talents as a producer and songwriter with the Jukes in the late 70s, following I Don’t Want To Go Home with This Time It’s For Real and Hearts Of Stone. Successive releases featured greater quantities of his original material, which included “I Played The Fool,” “This Time Baby’s Gone For Good,” “Take It Inside” and “Some Things Just Don’t Change,” apparently written for another of his heroes, David Ruffin of The Temptations. During this period, he also produced the “Say Goodbye To Hollywood” single for Ronnie Spector and the E Street Band and provided production assistance on Darkness On The Edge Of Town. His relationship with the Jukes ended when they left Epic for Mercury in 1979 and he went on to co-produce The River and two comeback albums for Gary US Bonds, Dedication and On The Line. It was an impressive fast-track apprenticeship. Steven had no production experience when he began. He acquired the skills and learned from his mistakes in the studio. “That’s why all three Jukes albums are different,” he says. “By the time we did The River, I knew what I wanted to do. I got it all down by then. That’s how I tend to do things. I can picture what I want. Jump in, do it, let’s see what happens.”

Steven also kept his promise to himself to bring his musical heroes out of obscurity, initially as guests on the first two Jukes albums. “I did what I could, but I wanted to do so much more,” he admits. “First time I get in a studio, got Lee Dorsey out from under a car, where he’s a mechanic. Got Ronnie Spector out of retirement. Second album, we reunited The Coasters, Drifters and Five Satins. Me and Bruce worked with Gary Bonds. We got Ben E King and Chuck Jackson on that record. Those artists had a talent level noticeably above everybody that followed. I wish I’d been insistent on doing more of them. In those [early] days, you actually had to have talent to make records. You had to be able to sing a song, beginning to end, perfectly in tune, perfectly the right melody, and if you fuck up one word, you gotta do the whole thing again. Couldn’t do enough for those people, they were so much fun to produce.”

In addition to his studio accomplishments, Steven played more than 300 shows with Bruce and the E Street Band between 1976 and 1981, primarily on the Darkness On The Edge Of Town and River tours. The majority took place in North America, but the River tour included a European leg that took the band away from home and out of their comfort zone for nine weeks. Much longer than their previous visit in 1975, it was their first significant experience of foreign countries, languages, cultures and political perspectives. They received rave reviews wherever they played, but Steven gradually became aware that not all Europeans viewed the United States in a favourable light.

One particular encounter was pivotal in dramatically reshaping Steven’s worldview. “A kid asked me, ‘Why are you putting missiles in my country?’ I said, ‘I’m not, I’m a guitar player.’ I realised, for the first time in my life, at the age of 30 I’m embarrassed to say, that I’m an American. What the fuck does that mean? I managed to grow up in the middle of civil rights, the Vietnam War, demonstrations about every fucking thing and had no interest in any of it. Amazing when you think about it. Redefining tunnel vision. Suddenly, the tunnel is gone. We’re now successful. Who would have ever figured that would happen, right? Now it’s like, uh-oh, what did I miss, the last 20 years?”

Track 9: Men Without Women, Motown and Mixing In Mono

This revelation accelerated Steven’s growing political awareness, one of two important developments in 1981 that would change the course of his life forever. The second came when he returned from Europe and was approached by EMI America about making a solo album. Having spent six years producing and writing for others, he welcomed the opportunity to have his own creative outlet, which soon expanded into a separate career. In the fall, he enlisted musicians from the E Street Band and the Asbury Jukes to record most of the material for his debut album, Men Without Women, using his established rock-meets-soul sonic blueprint. Including “Lyin’ In A Bed Of Fire,” “Princess Of Little Italy,” “Angel Eyes” and “Until The Good Is Gone,” it remains an undisputed career highlight for Van Zandt devotees, but Steven feels that an outside producer might have helped him make a more commercial record.

“Conventional wisdom is you never should produce yourself and I have to say that’s correct. The only exception I can think of in the history of the business was Prince, who was an extraordinary genius, but other than him, I don’t know anybody who successfully produces themselves.” Describing himself as “extremely schizophrenic, I’m twelve different people, never mind two,” Steven explains how his inner producer failed to control the whims of his inner artist. “Without knowing it, the artist takes over. I was into this extreme naturalism, no logical reason why. I did the whole album live in one day. Came back the second day, did it again, beginning to end. Couple overdubs, that was it. There’s one guitar. The horns aren’t doubled. Nothing’s doubled. Bruce did all the harmony on that record but we couldn’t use his name. We [did] a similar thing with Born In The USA, where we just recorded live in the studio.”

“I made Bob Clearmountain mix ‘Forever’ in mono, to try and achieve the perfect Motown record. It’s never gonna be exact and it shouldn’t be exact, why should it be, but I wanted to capture a Smokey Robinson Motown record. The only way I could do that in my mind was to make it completely mono. He was so good in those days. I mean Bob’s still the best, but in those days he was beyond the best. He was something else when it came down to that Neve board that wasn’t automated, and he’s feelin’ those faders. I made him do something he’d never done before, which requires a whole different way of thinking. You’re now thinking depth-wise and vertically, not horizontally.”

“That’s where my head was at. Can I achieve the emotional communication that my heroes had provided me? My heroes being Motown in general, 10 acts there. Or my heroes at Chess, another 10 acts. Sam Phillips did ‘Rocket 88’ for Ike Turner (Jackie Brenston) and ‘How Many More Years’ for Howlin’ Wolf, three years before Elvis Presley. Unbelievable genius. [I’m] trying to achieve that level of quality in my own world, in my own little bubble, which has these ridiculously high standards. I’m absorbing the 50s and 60s and then trying to integrate them in my head and reproduce them in my own way, not the least bit interested in what’s going on in the 70s or 80s certainly, because it was shit to me, comparatively. An interesting moment here and there. Punk was certainly interesting. But mostly it’s all coming from what I call the renaissance period, ‘51 to ‘71, where it all was created. And that’s true to this day. That’s all I was interested in and that was enough for 10 lifetimes. I didn’t need another bit of input after 1972.”

Track 10: Little Steven, Little Richard and Bob Dylan

In 1982, after recording with Bruce and Gary US Bonds, Steven completed his album, formed the Disciples of Soul (which included Dino Danelli from The Rascals on drums, Jean Beauvoir on bass and Eddie Manion, Mark Pender, Stan Harrison and La Bamba on horns) and played a debut concert at New York’s Peppermint Lounge. Released in October, a month after Nebraska, Men Without Women preceded his first national tour and was credited to his new professional name of Little Steven, which would be used for all future solo activities. “I just wanted separation [from] being the sideman,” he explains. “Each of my personalities required a different name, in order to keep it straight in people’s heads and my own head.” The name referenced his early heroes Little Walter, Little Anthony and Little Richard. In his role as an ordained minister, the latter officiated at Steven’s wedding to Maureen Santoro in New York on New Year’s Eve. Percy Sledge sang “When A Man Loves A Woman” as they walked down the aisle and the reception included performances from Gary US Bonds, Little Milton, The Chambers Brothers and the wedding band from The Godfather. “Little Anthony was doing a cruise at the time or he would have been there.”

“All I can think is, we’ve been hoping to get into recording our whole lives, I’m listening to this and it sounds fucking terrible. Not just the horn charts, everything. It was the worst period of recording in history. Virtually every record from the 50s and 60s sounded great, virtually every record from the early 70s sounded terrible. Because engineers took over, started close miking, padding the walls. Separation, separation, separation, all the things that make rock ‘n’ roll suck. The idea was, you isolate everything and make it sound exciting in the mix. Which they managed to do, miraculously, with the Born To Run album. Because it was pieced together in a bizarre way. Bruce made that record 100% out of willpower, he willed that into existence!”

Steven toured internationally in 1983, then dropped the horns, adopted a more contemporary rock sound and made his second album, Voice Of America. It was an explicitly political record that featured “Solidarity,” “I Am A Patriot,” “Out Of The Darkness,” “Los Desaparecidos” and “Undefeated.” Triggered by his River tour experiences in Europe, this radical transformation was completed with a long period of self-education. “I read every book about post World War Two [US] foreign policy. [It was] shocking how often we were on the wrong side. All of these bad things were happening behind the scenes and nobody was talking about them. No political consciousness whatsoever in the country. I decided I have an obligation to say something about this stuff that we’re all paying for with our taxes.”

“Being conscious of the fact that everybody needs their own identity, I figured who the hell needs another love song from a fucking sideman? I’ll be the political guy. Nobody else is doing it. There were people demonstrating of course. Jackson Browne, John Hall, Bonnie Raitt, Graham Nash, those guys. The Grateful Dead were doing a benefit every week, but rarely did it end up in the work. In general, people weren’t putting much politics into the lyrics of their songs.” For artists with commercial aspirations, he concedes, that’s a smart move. “Jefferson Airplane being an exception with ‘Volunteers.’ Big exception, Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young, with Neil Young’s ‘Ohio.’”

Steven contends that Bob Dylan’s “Subterranean Homesick Blues” introduced the idea of political consciousness in rock ‘n’ roll. “His first electric song. It’s not given enough credit. The first sentence from Bob Dylan’s electric period, ‘Johnny’s in the basement mixing up the medicine, I’m on the pavement thinking about the government.’ What? You’re doing what? You’re thinking about the government? Excuse me? Who does that? Whoever did that before, in a song, no less? There in that one sentence, Bob Dylan communicated what his entire career was gonna be about, which was having fun with language, with inference, symbolism, metaphor and nonsense lyrics that rhymed. ‘Johnny’s in the basement mixing up the medicine,’ what does that mean? It means whatever you want it to mean, right? Then ‘I’m on the pavement thinking about the government.’ Holy shit! You mean we’re supposed to figure out the government? That, to me, is the most important sentence in all the history of rock ‘n’ roll, right there.”

All photos below by Mike Saunders

[ineloqueent]

Starstruck: Part 15

Brian May x Fem!Reader

This is Part 15 of a multi-part fic. Click the links below to read the Masterpost, the previous part, or the next part of the fic :)

Masterpost / Part 14 / Part 16

Summary: When studying at Imperial College in the 1970s, your path is crossed by a beautiful boy as much in love with the stars as you.  

Warnings: swearing, drinking

Historical Inaccuracies:

Mary didn’t go on tour with Queen in 1975

On the 14th of November, 1975, Queen did not leave early for the start of the ANATO tour. Indeed, they “had to rush from London to Liverpool” (x) because they had been shooting the music video for ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ in the very same afternoon as the day of their first gig on tour!

Word Count: 3.8k

⁺˚*·༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺

August, September, and October disappeared in such a whirlwind rush that you hardly noticed them. You didn’t have time to notice much these days.

Queen were running thirty-eight-hour sessions at multiple recording studios throughout London, working day and night to record and refine the material for their still unnamed fourth album.

Preparations for a release in late November were in full swing, and Queen’s manager Reid was neglecting meetings with Elton John— Elton bloody John, it would never cease to amaze you— to dedicate his time to organising the legs of Queen’s next world tour. Locations, bookings, the transport of instruments and equipment and people, lodging, catering, insurance; the list of things to arrange was endless.

Which was why you often played assistant to Reid, in the absence of Reid’s actual assistant— some clonker named Paul Prenter who turned up late to meetings and had far too much to say for how few hours he put into going to work. You couldn’t be Reid’s full-time assistant, however, because you also tagged along with Roy Thomas Baker, Queen’s producer, since Freddie had more or less insisted that you do so.

You spent a lot of time with Queen, both in the studio and out of it.

In the studio, Freddie consulted you on album concept, Deacy relied on you for input on the song he was writing about Veronica, and Brian taught you to play ‘‘39’. Hearing you sing along with Brian, Roger decided that you should help with backing vocals on one of Freddie’s tracks, and much to everyone’s delight, he coaxed you into agreement. You weren’t delighted with this arrangement, though; you were far too nervous that you’d ruin the vocals of the others.

Outside of the studio, Freddie continued to harp on about your musical education, as he called it, lending you records until you were listening to his music almost constantly.

“I want you to have memorised my collection, darling,” he said one night, swirling his wine, “by the time we set off on tour.”

“Um, okay… That’s a lot of music, Freddie,” you’d swallowed, eyeing the quite frankly enormous record collection that Freddie’s living room housed.

“Psh, all in a day’s work.”

You saw Roger the least out of the four, because when not at Queen’s various recording locations, he was… well, he was bedding Heather, to put it politely. He did take you for the occasional drink and a banter, though. You found that you and he shared a lot of similarities in terms of childhood and upbringing, and this made Roger more brotherly to you than ever.

When he had the time, John would join Roger and you for drinks at the local pub, and the three of you would spend far too long chatting away into the evening. But mostly, Deacy and Ronnie were knackered from their parenting of Robert, and when you could see it all beginning to take a toll on John— he went from the studio to caring for his son and did not sleep in between— you offered yourself as a babysitting service. Deacy and Veronica were immensely grateful for this, because Robert seemed to like you, Auntie Y/N, and though the child could scream bloody murder if he so wished, he was generally a good kid. It was enjoyable to see him learning the ways of the world around him, from lights and colours, to the sounds of his parents’ voices.

Sometimes, when you babysat Robert, Brian came along.

Robert may have liked you, but he loved Brian.

Brian had helped John and Veronica to hang glow-in-the dark stars and planet-mobiles from the ceiling of what was to be Robert’s room when he moved out of his parents’ bedroom, and Brian had been as animated by the activity as though he had been decorating a room for himself.

When Brian visited Robert, he sang to him and rocked the child in his arms and danced about the room, quite forgetting that there was anybody else there. Robert would giggle and occasionally attempt to poke Brian’s nose, which brought Brian no end of wonder, and once again affirmed for you that Brian’s aspirations of one day becoming a father were well-suited to him.

Unfailingly, on the nights when Deacy and Veronica were away, once Robert fell asleep, Brian would suggest that the two of you take to the rooftop to see the stars— of course bringing with you a baby monitor. Thus, you spent many an evening wrapped in a blanket atop the roof of your friend’s house while your best friend sat beside you, cheeks flushed with the cold but unwilling to return inside, even though his teeth chattered and his hair blew about his face in the chilly wind. You began to bring hot chocolate to the roof, though what you really wanted to do to warm Brian was to curl into his side and snuggle close to him.

You didn’t, though. You reserved your pining for him in the form of long, lingering looks.

He’d called you his best friend, and best friends, you told yourself, were built upon platonic principles. If he’d wanted romantic involvement with you, he would have made that clear, and he hadn’t, so you resigned yourself to pushing your feelings down in the pit of your stomach and pretending that his smiles didn’t melt you as easily as chocolate on a summer’s day. Naturally, however, pushing feelings down doesn’t make them go away, but rather concentrates them more, so that every brief glance and accidental touch makes one feel that everything is just that much closer to bubbling over entirely.

But Brian was everywhere you looked, inescapable, inevitable, smiling and just being generally goofy, spouting the most fascinating facts about the cosmos at odd intervals, urging you to sing with him when he sang, nodding at you approvingly over his guitar when you matched his vibrato almost perfectly one Thursday night. Because despite everything, despite Queen’s dawn-to-dusk-to-dawn schedule, Brian still made time for teaching you guitar on Thursday nights.

If it wasn’t for the nights, you might have thought that you could take it.

Take him winking at you and calling you ‘love’ at irregular moments so that your heart stuttered and your thoughts grew sluggishly slow. Take him being near you at almost every hour of every day, and long into the nights as well. Take him existing in his willowy gorgeousness, sunshine-warmed skin and sunlit eyes, soft curls, wide-eyes, angular frame.

But the nights were long, because Brian had confessed that he had begun to sleep better as of late, and this rendered his beauty healthier, more stark, in light of his getting enough rest.

Yes, the nights were long, not for him but for you, because you couldn’t close your eyes without seeing his gentle smile and his hazel eyes.

It was as though he had traded you a milder case of his insomnia, and it frustrated you perpetually, because when you weren’t working or lounging about with Queen, you were studying intensely so as to take your final exams early.

Indeed, you’d committed to not only Queen, but to astrophysics as well.

You were working overtime to finish this year’s coursework early— very early— in fact, by the middle of this month.

You’d been surprised that Dr. Carmichael had even agreed to help you in the first place, but you suspected that something about your situation had reminded him of himself. In the very least, when you’d boldly asked him why he was willing to help you with extra lecture hours and study sessions, he’d said something cryptic about once having missed an opportunity himself, and that he regretted nothing more in his life. You’d been floored that he would openly admit something so personal, being that Carmichael wasn’t the open-book type, but he’d only smiled sadly and told you to have your next paper on his desk by Monday.

It was all very stressful, going from the studio to studying and back to the studio. Your days dissolved into exam preparations and recording sessions, with only guitar lessons in between.

The most difficult part of it all was the guitar lessons.

Brian right across from you, biting his lip, bending strings up the fretboard with long fingers and a concentrated gaze. He’d glance up and nod to you, upon which you’d copy the movement he’d just done, and he would either nod again and continue in whatever song he was playing, or offer you critique. He was articulate in his teaching, and his manner utterly enamoured you, because he moved as though he were made of light.

God, you wanted to kiss him. Just the thought of him being so close to you, touching you, made you shiver. He was so delicate in everything that he did, and you wanted his delicate hands against your skin, his mouth on your mouth, breathing the same air, and you wanted him to want you.

Perhaps that was why you’d begun flirting with him, against your every notion of common sense.

It was just an innuendo here, a touch there, winking at him over your guitar. You didn’t even know where any of it was coming from, because you’d never once in your life had the confidence to flirt. Maybe you drew confidence from Brian’s reaction each time you said or did something suggestive; he blushed, looked down, smiled boyishly. Fucking hell, he was cute. And you felt an inexplicable rush of adrenaline every time you got away with pushing boundaries.

It had been Friday afternoon when Freddie opened a bottle of Moët et Chandon in the kitchen of his flat, and you were with him and Roger and John and Brian to cry woah! when the bubbly liquid shot out of the bottle and onto the floor.

“Freddie,” Brian tutted, shaking his head, and you tried not to laugh.

Roger tossed Brian a tea towel and Brian mopped up the spilled champagne.

“Well, darlings, that’s it,” said Freddie a few minutes later as the five of you gripped filled glasses, “that’s the next album!”

There was a cheer.

Roger raised his glass. “To…” He frowned. “To what? We haven’t exactly named the album.”

You all frowned. Then Deacy shook his head. “To the album!” he said.

“To the album!” you all chorused, laughter abundant in the moments before everyone drank their champagne.

This afternoon, it had been just you and the band, because Freddie had wanted an in-celebration before he threw the actual party for the album on the first night of the tour. But this afternoon gathering also had other significance: today was Reid’s deadline for when the name of the album had to be decided.

And by the time you left Freddie’s place at five that evening, a film had been watched, and a decision had been made.

The name of the album was to be as rivetingly dramatic and as magnificently opulent as the name of Queen.

The album was to be called A Night At The Opera.

⁺˚*·༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺

The wind was a character in itself, and the sky was weary with the plethora of grey clouds it carried, but it was not raining.

You noticed, because you wanted to remember. You wanted to remember everything about today, the day you set off for Liverpool. With Queen.

You were going on tour.

With Queen.

It hadn’t really sunk in yet. Still, it was happening, because you were walking from the Underground to the tour bus pickup point, which was by one of the studios Queen had been using to record the album.

You had packed light— a minimal array of clothes that would last you a while, being mixed and matched and reused until a washing machine could be located; some essential toiletries; a few well-loved books; your messenger bag; your guitar.

You’d dressed in your warmest, heaviest clothes from the beginning, layering as your mum had always taught you to do.

Your mum. She’d rung you last night.

“And you promise me you’ll call?” she’d said, as though she were in some dramatic film about her daughter leaving on some risky adventure, during which all the characters in the movie learn emotional maturity through a montage of artistically-shot scenes.

You’d sighed, every bit the exasperated daughter. “I’ve promised you before, mum. You know I always keep my word.”

But the dramatic film analogy had indeed borne a grain of truth. This was an adventure, and it was risky.

Money wasn’t something you’d brought much of, because it wasn’t something you had much of. Queen were already covering your expenses as far as food and lodging, and you hadn’t wanted to bother your parents for any money, given how you were already letting them down a little in postponing the completion of your astrophysics degree.

But, as ineloquent as the phrase was, this tour was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

How many people would be able to look back on their life and say, ‘yes, I went on a world tour with a rock ‘n’ roll band’? So few. So few that it was almost saddening that you were getting the chance to do something like this, while so many others would never.

And to think that you’d almost not come along.

Brian was leaning against the tour bus, a book held elegantly before his face as he rested his elbow on his other arm, which was wrapped around his upper body. He looked cold, with windburn colouring his cheeks, his lower lip tucked between his teeth, and his arm was likely wrapped around him more for warmth than in support of the book.

He lowered the novel as you approached, a lovely smile already on his face.

“Morning!” he said brightly.

“Shh,” you chided. “It’s three AM, Brian.”

“Ah, yes,” Brian nodded, his face serious. “No decent people have got up yet.”

“What does that make us?” you laughed.

He leaned forward conspiratorially. “Indecent,” he winked.

You’d thought there was only so many times that Brian May could make you blush, but here you were again, blushing like you were five years old, instead of twenty-five.

“Not on my bus, you’re not,” said Freddie to Brian, hopping down off of the tour bus.

Brian rolled his eyes. “Don’t be a hypocrite, Fred.”

“I think you should be directing your chastity comments toward Roger and Heather, Freddie,” you said, nodding in the direction of the two shadowy figures that had been approaching, only to stop in the middle of the empty road to have a snog.

Freddie wrinkled his nose. “Yes indeed. We may need some ground rules.”

Deacy stuck his head out of the bus. “ROGER! No shagging on the bus!”

“Shhh!” you and Brian and Freddie cried all at once.

“Three o’clock in the morning, everyone,” you said. “Three o’clock.”

“Now that, dearie,” Freddie raised a finger, “reminds me. I’m going back to sleep.”

He mounted the steps to the bus once more, and disappeared inside.

“Me too, I think,” said John, blinking tired eyes before following Freddie back onto the bus.

Tucking his book into the folds of his coat, Brian turned to you. “Can I give you a hand with that?” he nodded to your suitcase.

“Yeah, thanks.”

He took your suitcase and loaded it onto the bus, and offered to take your guitar as well, until Roadie-John turned up and muttered something about being put out of a job, confiscating your guitar from Brian.

Brian widened his eyes at you, and the two of you boarded the bus before you could offend any more roadies at far too early of an hour.

“By the way,” Brian said as he held the door open for you, “I like your scarf.”

You tugged on the end of the rainbow garment. “I wonder why.”

Inside, Roger and Heather had arrived and were sitting in a booth by the window, flicking through polaroids. Mary was there too, and she smiled sleepily at you and Brian as you entered, her eyes only half-focussed on the magazine in her lap.

Freddie and Deacy had each drawn the curtains of their bunks. From the sounds of snoring that drifted from their direction, it was obvious that they’d both already fallen asleep again. You envied their ability to slip into unconsciousness so quickly; sleep did not come easily to you, these days.

Brian seemed to think the same thing. “Lucky bastards,” he muttered, “falling asleep like that.”

“Treacherous,” you agreed, and Brian smiled at you. But then you yawned, and he raised his eyebrows.

“Am I to expect your betrayal as well?” he said.

You shook your head. “No, just my annoyingness as a travel partner. Chances are I’ll just yawn for hours and never have anything come of it.”

But Brian frowned thoughtfully. “Exactly what time did you go to bed last night?”

You winced, remembering the late hour. In fact, it wasn’t many hours ago at all. “Midnight,” you responded sheepishly.

“Midnight?” said Brian. “You’re worse than me! Go on,” he ushered you toward a pair of seats, “sit down, have a rest. Even if you can’t sleep, it’s good to close your eyes for a bit.”

“Says the insomniac,” you retorted, albeit half-heartedly. You really were rather tired. You slid into the narrow gap, taking the window seat, and Brian sat down beside you. “You know how hard it is to keep your eyes shut when they don’t want to be.”

Brian smiled, and you knew he empathised. “All the same. Less than three hours of sleep, Y/N. That’s quite bad.”

You sighed. “I know, I know.”

Soon, Roadie-John, Crystal, and Ian Brown, who was to be managing the UK leg of the tour, boarded, and with the driver in his seat, the bus rolled out of Osborn Street and onto the main road.

“Think I’ll try reading,” you said, pulling out the book at the top of the pile in your bag. Brian shrugged off his coat, folding it in his lap and retrieving his paperback from one of the inner pockets.

He looked at his book, and then at yours, and then back at his again.

“What is it?”

“We could just have brought the one copy and shared it,” he said, “saved that packing space.” A goofy grin was on his face as he waved his copy of Steppenwolf, the very same book you held in your hands.

“Oh! You like Hermann Hesse?”

“He’s my favourite author,” said Brian, and the same stupid grin he’d worn before appeared on your own face.

“Good taste,” you told him, covering a yawn.

Crystal dimmed the overhead lights. “I’m going to sleep,” he announced to no one in particular, and as you looked around, you found that, with the exception of the driver, you and Brian were the only ones left awake.

“Well then,” Brian said in the darkness, “there’s not really any good light to read by.”

You snorted. “If you’re trying to convince me to go to sleep, you’re failing miserably.”

Wordlessly, Brian slid his book into the seat pocket in front of him, then eased your bag from your lap and the book from your hands, setting your bag on the floor and the book into its own seat pocket. He lifted his coat from his own lap and draped it over you, tucking it in around your shoulders.

“I’m sorry I’ve nothing more to offer you,” he said softly, as the lights of the city swept over his face through the uncovered window.

And yet he’d given you everything he had. Selflessly, without a thought, though the morning was cold and he still had not warmed from standing outdoors in the wake of the wind.

The simple gesture filled you with such an adoration that you had no way to express it.

You shuffled closer to him and laid his coat across you both, then settled your head on his shoulder. “Thank you, Brian.”

He leaned his head against yours, and you were reminded of the night at Ridge Farm.

You sighed quietly, cuddling into his side. You fought to keep your eyes open, but you were so tired, and Brian was so warm.

“Go to sleep and dream again,” he murmured sweetly, and your eyelids felt a thousand times heavier than before.

“What if I miss something?” you whispered, because the fear of the world passing you by was suddenly overwhelming.

Brian’s voice hummed in harmony with the peaceful silence around him. “I’ll be right here to tell you about everything when you wake up again.”

“Everything?”

“Every butterfly and every tree,” he promised. “Every hole in the road and every star in the sky.”

⁺˚*·༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺

“Y/N,” Brian was shaking your shoulder gently. “Love, we’re here.”

You groaned. “M’was fimally ‘sleep,” you said.

“I know. I’ve already postponed waking you for this long, though,” he said. “The others have left. They’ve unloaded the bus.”

You sat up blearily. “Well, I should get on with it, then.”

Brian smiled. “You can sleep when you get to your hotel room. It’s not like we’ve got anything to do today, anyway, until soundcheck.”

“Well, you’ve got to tell me about everything you saw while I was asleep.”

He laughed. “Shouldn’t take too long. It was London to Liverpool, there’s not much to report.”

You passed him his coat, which had somehow migrated entirely over to you, and he passed you your bag, slipping your book back into one of the pockets.

Brian looked at you a moment, and you stared back up at him, wondering what he saw in your half-open eyes and messy hair while you were met with the sight of pretty hazel irises and immaculate curls.

He reached for the rainbow scarf and wound it around you more tightly, adjusting your jumper so that it wasn’t in the way. His touch lingered on the nape of your neck, his eyes roamed yours. His lips were rendered a dusky pink in the pale morning light.

“It’s cold in Liverpool,” he said, and slid from his seat.

Your eyes followed him as he disembarked the bus, his curls bobbing as he bent a little to avoid hitting his head on a beam.

Anyone could have seen the longingness in your stare, how you yearned to call him back, pull him to you, kiss him until he was lost for both breath and words, watch him blush the way he made you blush.

There was really nothing stopping you.

You’re my best friend.

So perhaps there was one thing stopping you.

Brian poked his head back through the door. Affection bloomed in your chest at the mere sight of him. It was sickening.

“Coming?” he asked, far too awake for seven o’clock in the morning.

“Yeah,” you said. “Coming.”

⁺˚*·༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺

A/N: filler? call me out. it’s okay, because next week is chapter 16 :’)

taglist: @melting-obelisks @sgt-stardustkillerqueen @hgmercury39​ @topsecretdeacon @joemazzmatazz​ @perriwiinkle​ @brianmays-hair​ @im-an-adult-ish​ @ilikebigstucks​ @doing-albri​ @killer-queen-87​ @n0-self-c0ntro1​ @archaicmusings​ @cloudyyspace​ @annina-96​ @themarchoftherainbowqueen​ @annajolras​ 

Masterpost / Part 14 / Part 16

#tina's writing #starstruck #brian may x reader #fic

[sunsetinmyvein]

The Radio Station - Chapter Six - Why Can’t We Be Friends?

26th of November, 2018

  Eventually, she saw it all unfold in the headlines. The lies. The heroin. The trip to rehab. It was devastating to discover the root cause of Matty’s behaviour in such a disconnected way from how she might’ve expected to discover it a few years ago. A part of her wanted to reach out, to check in and see if he was doing all right, offer to help, but she suspected after their last two interactions that maybe she was better off just leaving it. However, in contrast to the sinking feeling from knowing he had been going through such turmoil, it was incredibly uplifting to see him getting back on his feet. For him to be writing and releasing music again meant that he must’ve successfully made it to the other side. Whenever the announcement of a new album came, she waited in anticipation for the email confirming that he’d be coming back on the show. She wasn’t entirely sure if she was excited at the thought of seeing him again, or absolutely dreading the prospect of things still being uncomfortable between them - her emotions seemed to regularly flip flop between the two. It was awfully close to the album release date when she finally got the confirmation from her boss; she had begun to suspect maybe he didn’t want to come back on the show after how they’d left things. He’d have every right to resent her after how she’d treated him.

 She was knocked out of her thoughts whenever she heard a soft knock at the door, turning in her chair to see Matty standing outside with a sheepish smile, having arrived early. His hair was cropped quite a bit shorter than she’d seen it before but he was still sporting his natural curls. He was wearing some puffy yellow coat over a plain shirt, and stock standard worn out blue jeans. It was probably the most… average, that she’d ever seen him look (not that average was ever a truly fitting word to describe Matthew Healy). She waited for him to push the door open and come in, but he seemed to be waiting for her to let him in. As she stood up and opened the door, and he gingerly made his way inside and loitered next to her desk for a minute, she was suddenly vividly reminded of the first time she’d met him. All she could see was the nervous twenty-three-year-old that she’d met six years ago, who was scared shitless about his first proper radio interview. The nostalgia hit like a freight train, and before she could give it a second thought she grabbed him in a tight hug.

  He hugged her back, pressing his face into her shoulder as he let out the breath he had been holding. “I’m sorry…” She said quietly after a moment.

He gave an incredulous laugh at that, “You’re sorry? For what?” He asked. “I was the dickhead.”

“I just…” This hadn’t really been the way she expected herself to instantly react, nor had she thought of anything to say in this situation. Her mouth was running dry trying to come up with the right words to explain what she was feeling. “I wasn’t exactly a good friend.”  

“I think we were both a bit guilty of that.” He chuckled as he ran a hand through his hair, taking a step back.

“I should’ve tried harder.” She tried to explain, frowning at herself as she floundered for the right sentiment.

“It’s fine, truly.” He reassured her. “I wouldn’t have told you what was happening, anyway. Nobody knew.” He added with a shrug.

  They took their seats opposite the desk, both feeling slightly relieved but well aware there was still tension surrounding them. “Uh, is there anything you want me to avoid asking about?” She asked eventually, busying herself with checking the text line to avoid looking directly at him.

“No.” Matty replied instantly. “I’d prefer you ask what you want to rather than censor yourself for my benefit. I won’t answer it if it’s too much.” He clarified. “Thanks for checking, though.”

“Are you…” She hesitated, unsure of the boundaries of their friendship now and how much she should be asking for her own curiosity. “Are you all right now?” She asked as she looked across to him.

He cracked a small smile, “Considerably better. Probably not all the way there yet, though. It’s hard with my girlfriend back at home for the moment, but I’m managing. Keeping busy with other stuff to stay occupied.” He answered truthfully. She nodded in understanding. “And you? It’s been at least three years since we’ve had a proper conversation.” The realisation of how long it had actually been stung slightly, but she ignored that feeling and instead focused on the fact that he seemed to genuinely want to know how she’d been.

“Good.” She grinned. “Doing well on the morning slot now that it’s been a few years.”

“You’ve been making a bit of a reputation for yourself over here, I hear your name get kicked around a bit when I’m at home. It’s nice to see you getting proper recognition for your efforts.” She tried her best not to blush at the subtle compliment.

 Thankfully she didn’t have too long to dwell on his kind words and any connotations behind them before the interview started. The nervous butterflies sat at the pit of her stomach as she switched the live audio and video feeds over, lying in wait in case the interview still felt as awkward and forced as the last two.

“Matty, great to have you back.” She spoke, clearing her throat slightly.

“Great to be back after so long.” He said cheerfully.

“The 1975 release their new record in six days, A Brief Inquiry into Online Relationships-”

“Only six days?” He muttered to himself in slight disbelief.  

“We’ve only got a relatively short interview today, because after this you are heading straight into the live lounge to play a few tracks for us.” He made a noise of agreement. “We’ve heard five singles off it, all of which sound very different from one another in true 1975 fashion.” Matty laughed lightly at that. “And I noticed that you did the same thing with this album as what you did with I Like it When You Sleep; the first single you released was the first track on the album. Is this becoming a habit for you guys?” She asked.

“Probably not a habit.” He started, letting out a huff. “It just felt like the most natural thing to do. Whether it felt like a primary statement or not, I’m not sure. We’d already made an album by that point, we hadn’t made a group of singles. I hadn’t been thinking ‘oh, how do we butter them up?’ Just thought… this is the first song on the record. Put it out.” He shrugged.

  “Do you think this is your strongest record so far?”

“A hundred percent.” He answered instantly.

“I’ve heard people comparing it to OK Computer. Saying that it’s a similar thing for the millennial generation.” She prompted.

He let out a groan, “I try not to think much about it.” He admitted. “I mean, what do I say? It’s so humbling and amazing, but strange also, because… the only realisation that I really came to, about the record – I think the reference to OK Computer is maybe it’s kind of, the narrative is incredibly twinned with how we communicate and the internet and all those kind of things. Which is obviously OK Computer in a nutshell. My favourite records are about life.” He said, clenching his fist for emphasis and knocking the microphone lightly. “It’s maybe a bit of a big thing to say, but I was just writing a record about relationships. Well… I wasn’t even doing that; I was just writing a record. And it turns out if you’re trying to write an honest record about relationships and how they’re mediated in the modern day, you’re kind of by proxy writing about the internet.” He explained. Things already felt more natural than what they had of late. Matty felt more open and responsive, which instantly put her mind at ease.

  “One of the other singles that we’ve heard from the album is Love It If We Made It, which is…” She tried to pick her words carefully to best capture her thoughts on the song succinctly, “a pretty powerful song to say the least.”

Matty nodded enthusiastically before answering, “The thing with Love It If We Made It… it was very, very difficult to write. It’s a list of information. The idea stemmed from the fact that over a year we collected tabloid newspapers every day to make the lyrics. Unfortunately, when we got to trying that, it was too slapstick. The song was hard to get right. It needed to be as objective and as fair and as anti… ‘watch out sheeple’ as possible. And that’s hard to do.”

“It seems you guys did a good job with it in the end. It’s been resonating well with our listeners.”

“Thanks.” Matty grinned proudly.  

“It’s Not Living If It’s Not With You has also had quite the response.” She added, hoping he’d have a bit to say about that, and that maybe it could work as a segue to the questions blowing up her screen in her peripheral vision.

“It’s… I don’t know…” He sighed, staring blankly at the wall behind her as he tried to formulate an answer. “The way I always explain it, it’s like it’s a song that sounds poppy but it’s about something serious. Which, okay, that’s straight up 1975. And that’s because the feeling that I get from music, narratively or musically, can kind of be the same thing. You know like being nervous or being like, er, anxious for a date, physically could be the same feeling as the fear of heights if you get rid of all the intellect. Emotionally, you get the same thing. I’ve always been like, I get this feeling when I read the lyrics of Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen but I get the same carnal feeling when I hear the music to Girls Just Want to Have Fun. So… the synthesis of those ideas has just been the most obvious thing in the world for me, you know what I mean?” He looked across to her for confirmation. “I think that idea really sums up The 1975. If you’re a big fan of The 1975, that’s the most 1975-iest song on the record.”

  She had hoped he would jump straight into the lyrical content of the song, but clearly she would need to segue into it herself. “That totally makes sense.” She agreed. “There’s been a bit of a debate about the subject matter of It’s Not Living.” She said, giving him a cautious glance. He’d said not to worry about asking whatever she wanted to, but that didn’t stop her from feeling like she was delving too deep into his private life.

He hummed thoughtfully. “I’m pretty sure most of the fans know what it’s about.” He said with a dry laugh. “I’ve not like… done some big reveal of my relationship with drugs over the past couple of years. I think that because…” He stared down at the desk with a frown, “I used to have nightmares about being exposed. Because remember, my whole game has always been that ‘do I know that you know that I think that I’m a rock star?’ that’s always been my whole thing.” He said with a pointed look. “So, the idea though, of actually being known for being a junkie and doing those kinds of things, used to terrify me. Because then I’m a cliché. I lose all of my irony and lose all of my funniness because I’m an actual cliché. So, I think even when I’m talking about it on this record, I’m still going ‘Danny ran into some complications-’ it’s like I’m using characters. It’s a bit like somebody going ‘I’ve got this mate, right, and he’s got a bit of this weird rash-’ “ He chuckled. “Like ‘yeah, all right, well tell your mate-’ it’s like we know who you’re talking about. I think the idea that I’m still trying to hide and remove myself from it is part of the gag. But then the chorus is brutally honest. It’s difficult to write a song like that. It’s hard to despise the idea of fetishizing or romanticising drug use as a behaviour but then only having my truth. Like I don’t have anything else, I don’t have anywhere else to talk about it. There is a hopelessness to drug addiction. You don’t keep doing it because it’s cool, you keep doing it because you feel like there’s no life without it.” His expression seemed to become quite sombre at that before he continued his train of thought. “And to express that… it wasn’t like a relief for me. The music is a catharsis for me, but it wasn’t like I needed to get that out. Unfortunately, I’m only my set of experiences, and they’re pretty limited as somebody who’s been on the road for four years trying to mediate his life through drug addiction, y’know? So yeah… it’s difficult to walk that line. Um… But I just had to make sure that… like with most of my work, any discussion of my behaviour is normally with a profound distaste. And kids are smart, man.”

  She hadn’t really expected him to be so open about it so readily. “What started it?” She asked instinctually, almost forgetting for a moment that she was at work and meant to be providing entertainment. “If you don’t mind me asking.” She added as an afterthought.

He waved a hand dismissively at her worry. “I’d be on stage, and there would be however many thousands of people. And I’m genuinely trying to connect with people, you know? And then it’s done. Go back to the hotel room. Go to sleep. Like… what?” He answered with a frustrated huff. “I was trying to change culture in my head ten minutes ago and now I’ve gotta go to sleep? I used drugs to go to sleep primarily. I’ve never had a good relationship with sleep, anyway… I’ve always been jealous of people they’ll tell me about a dream and they’ll kind of like explain this little kind of film that they’ve been that has a dynamic of emotions and it was up and it was down and my dreams are just like terror. Just fear. I’ve never had that many good dreams. And drugs stop you dreaming. But then obviously… you have solutions to get rid of that post-show buzz. Didn’t really get me anywhere. Spoilt it, as well. Did way too much. Did loads of it.” He admitted. “So, I can’t do anymore of it… when I’m older.” He laughed.

  “So, you became reliant on that as a comedown?” She questioned.

“It was always gonna happen with me with opiates.” He said bluntly. “I only say this in case people relate to it, but like, when I was younger, I kind of used to dream about being sedated. And unfortunately, sex, drugs, other things, religion, I’ve loved all these things in my life but they’ve never just-” He clicked his fingers, “turned it off. And unfortunately, when I tried those drugs, I – temporarily, for a moment – had that. And I was like, right, this is gonna help. And erm,” He picked at his nail anxiously. “It just takes your shine off, slows you down. Makes you lie, which is a nightmare for somebody who is so Mr Tell The Truth.”

“The lies are what got you caught?”

He made a noise of contemplation. “The problem is… I’m very, very lucky, is what I am. And I have an infrastructure around me of like… we’ve been a band since we were fourteen, I’m twenty-nine, right.” He said with a pointed look in her direction. “We’re like brothers, we love each other. I have amazing opportunities like this,” He gestured around the studio, “I have my health, I have all these things. There’s not a lot of people around me who allow stuff like… hard drug use. And that’s really annoying when you’re a drug addict. But it also makes you reflect, you know what I mean? Because you just end up lying, and being a version of yourself that- but that’s part of the sickness. You incentivise things weirdly.” He explained with a shrug.

  “And the rehab centre you went to was in Barbados?” She asked. He nodded in response. “I heard that the band paid for that?”

His expression visibly softened when she brought that up. “Yeah. I think the nice story was that uh… Obviously, I’m in a fortunate place in my career that - obviously I have to think about those kind of financial things - but before I went I was kind of thinking ‘I’ll sort that out when I’m out there’ and then I remember saying to Jamie ‘oh-‘ and he was like ‘aw nah, nah, it’s all sorted’ and I was like ‘Oh, how much did it - what was it?’ and he was like ‘oh, well we just did it out the band’ and I was like ‘oh really??’ “ He seemed visibly touched by this story, even retelling it now.

“That was pretty amazing of them to do.”

“Yeah… Yeah, it was.” He muttered, still clearly caught up in his own thoughts. “And you know what, if you want a band to last forever, share.” He added simply.

  “And this place you went to, supposedly they do a bunch of stuff with horses?” She asked in confusion. When she had heard this information, she was almost certain she had gotten her wires crossed, but Matty was already confirming what she had said.

“Equine therapy, yeah! It was, basically…” He started trying to explain, before cracking a smile and looking across to her. “In reality what it was, for the first two or three days was me stood in a field rolling my eyes next to a horse.” He said with a laugh. “That’s what it was really. This guy put me in a field with a horse and was like ‘talk to the horse’ so I’m like” He gave a sarcastic look, “ ‘…all right?’ So, he leaves me alone and I’m like ‘hey man’ and the horse obviously didn’t say anything.” She couldn’t help but laugh at the image. “And then he put me in the round pen, right. He put me in this pen which was just round – was a good explanation of it.” He reprimanded himself with a snort. “And I stood in the middle, and basically he said ‘I want you to walk towards the horse. It’s gonna send the horse around in a loop, and I want you to assert your position. You’re not going to get the horse. You’re just telling the horse that this is where you’re going’. All this stuff. So, I do it. And he goes ‘you’ll notice three things, at one point the horse will dip its head, then it’ll bow its ear to you, then it’ll start biting its lips. Once it’s done these three things, I want you to turn your back and drop the rope.’ So, I’m like right, lips, thing, do this, yep. And the horse is running, the horse is running, I watched for these three cues, and I dropped the rope and I turned round. The horse stopped dead.” He clapped his hands together for emphasis, staring at her seriously.

  “I swear to you, it was one of the most profound moments of my life. The horse stopped dead, came over to me and stood behind me – and this is a horse that for three days had mugged me off. And I was… stood there with this horse, that now… wanted to be with me?” He seemed entirely perplexed by this. “Then when I walked it wouldn’t cross my feet,” He gestured to his feet as he said this, knocking his microphone in the process. “Sorry, I keep hitting the microphone. Way too gesticulated today. Erm, when I went into the field and hung out with it, it wanted to be with me. And then I stood there and was like ‘Ah… Right…’ Then all of these profound things… It was so…” He tried his best to find the words. “It ate everything it needed to eat, and didn’t complain about it, and didn’t eat too much of it, and ate the right stuff. It had the ability to destroy anything it wanted, but the desire to hurt nothing. It was physically perfect and strong. It was forgiving with its time with me. And it was kind of compassionate in a way, ‘cause he’s a horse, he doesn’t want me there, he just wants to be a horse. But he let me be there.” It was abundantly clear how much of an impact this experience had on Matty. He spoke about it so passionately that it was hard not to feel moved by what he was saying. “I found myself envying all of these human qualities in a horse. And I think that was the point of it…” He said with a look of finality. “At least, I hope that was the point of it. Otherwise I’ve screwed it up and learned nothing.” He laughed loudly. “But it worked for me.”

  “How are you finding it? Being off the drugs?” She asked, leaning back in her seat after having been leant forward in interest for the last few minutes as he told his story.

He pulled a face as he tried to answer that in a manner suitable for a mass radio audience. “I mean… I wouldn’t say I’m this ‘beacon of sobriety’ “ He punctuated that with air quotes, “that’s kind of, telling you how it is to be an ex addict. I don’t know.” He answered sincerely. “I’ve not gone long enough. I’m not gonna start talking about ‘I haven’t done drugs in five years - ten years’ it was only a few months ago. I was still doing loads of them.” He said as he scratched at his neck.

“Is it harder now without them?”

“I don’t sleep as good as I used to with it, but I’m getting by.” He replied with a nod. “I’m all right with sleeping now. The band and my girlfriend have been really supportive and helpful. I’m doing all the things now that I used to do when I took drugs all the time. So, I’ve just made a record without doing it all the time,” He ticked that off on a finger, “so that was an experience, that was a challenge. I’ve now started touring without doing it all the time,” He ticked that off as well, “that’s an experience, that’s a challenge. I’m now about to start getting on planes all the time and touring internationally,” He added that to the list, “that’ll be a challenge. But you’ve just gotta take it day by day as the cliché says, or you’ll freak yourself out.”

  “You talk about drugs pretty freely in your music, but you don’t really speak about it in interviews, was that to try and stay… disconnected from it to some degree? Did you think it was going to get as bad as it did?” She asked. She had entirely tuned out of the fan questions being sent in now, asking these questions almost purely from her own curiosity to know what had happened to the Matty she knew.

“No, no, no… I didn’t. I mean, I think the thing that I think I always have confidence in is that because I’ve – regardless of if it’s drugs or relationships - the main thing I’ve done with The 1975 is spoken about myself with kind of quite a profound disdain.” He answered. “There’s not really been a celebration of the behaviour. I think that if I was ever romanticising or fetishizing the use of drugs, I think I’d catch myself doing it. And if I ever have done that in a lyric, it will be immediately met with a lyric that shows that one up to be ironic or flawed.” He elaborated. That made sense. Most of his songs did reflect that attitude. “I’ve just had to be honest. Religion allows you to kind of give something away, sex, exactly the same thing. They’re just ways of giving up some kind of responsibility in the moment. But by that point I’d done ‘em all!” He grinned, still trying to keep the mood light despite the heavy topic. “Drugs was the only one left.”

  She stared at him for a moment, just taking in all of the information he’d given her in such a short timeframe. It was a lot to process all at once, but it made a lot of the pieces click into place and answered a lot of questions that had kept her up at night when they had lost contact. Eventually she clocked back into reality, seeing that he was watching her just as intently as she had been watching him while he had divulged some of the most intimate aspects of his life.

“So, to a lighter note-” She segued.

“It’s fine, I don’t mind talking about it.” He said with a chuckle.

She smiled back at him, “I’m sure our listeners have enjoyed hearing it all in such great detail. But, there are some other big events that have been happening in your life as well that we haven’t brought up.” She said.

“Oh?”

“The 1975 will be headlining Reading and Leeds next year.”

“Yes!” He beamed. “It’s our first big headline festival. It gets me proper emotional. We didn’t just go as kids, after I got to thirteen, Christmas took a back seat and the date on my calendar was Reading and Leeds. I went one year with a tenner and no tent. I mean, I’ve had some moments there. It’ll definitely be a very humble show. All of this ego and confidence here will be gone.” He scoffed, “ ‘Honestly guys, thanks so much for coming.’ ” He said in a feigned blubbering emotional voice, before giggling at himself. “But like, we’ve just become a really good band in my opinion. I think we could headline Reading and Leeds tomorrow if you asked us to.”

  “Are you particularly excited to have content off the new album to perform there?”

“Definitely. There are some songs on there that will be added into the festival setlists. It was about creating a distillation of what preceded it. Everything needed to be better, more extreme. Poppy bits poppier, heavy bits heavier, honest bits more honest.” He explained with a nod. “You can look at your work and be like ‘what did I do there that someone likes’ or ‘let’s try and do that piano thing’. Me, when I’m like, really personal, really honest, that’s when I get the best reaction. So, I just tend to do that. Like what’s gonna make me, y’know-“ He started pretending to tear up for emphasis.

“And you guys are already working on the next album, Notes on a Conditional Form? This one’s not even out yet!”

He just laughed. “We went away and what happened was, we finished A Brief Inquiry, kind of had a week off and then we started with Notes. I’m just letting it happen.” He shrugged. “I’m letting it happen in the next six months. It’ll be before…” He seemed to be doing some calculations in his head. “August. It has to be in time for Reading and Leeds.” He added decisively.

  Glancing down at the clock on the screen next to her, she could see that they had in fact gone over time. “Well, as always Matty, it’s been lovely having you on the show, but I think we have to wrap it up so you can scoot over to the live lounge and get yourself set up.” She said with a small sigh, disappointed that the interview had to end after how well it had been going. Matty had felt entirely captivating as he spoke today, clearly on his game.

“God, this’ll be the first time we’ve played together in… ages.” He said as he pulled a hand through his hair and leaned back into his chair. “And we’ve not played these songs live yet, either. This will be the debut.”

“Incredibly exciting.” She nodded. “So, I’ll let you go. Tune in folks in half an hour, The 1975 will be playing a short set for us of songs from their new album, A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships, in the live lounge.” She spoke into the microphone, before rounding out the interview.

  Matty didn’t move from his chair across from her as she switched the camera feed off and switched over to the next round of tracks.

“Are you coming?” He asked as soon as she took her headset off. “To the live lounge?” He clarified.

Her shift was meant to end in just over twenty minutes, and they started in thirty. She could probably finish up quickly enough to make it down there in time. “Yeah, I can do that.” She said with a nod.

He grinned eagerly, “It’ll be wicked to have you there for it.”

“It’s probably about time I saw you guys play.” She laughed as he stood up.

“I’ll see you shortly.” He said over his shoulder as he made his way out of the studio.

  * * *

 By the time she made her way down to the live lounge quite a crowd had already formed. Her handover between shifts had been fairly rushed in an attempt to get out of there quickly, but obviously The 1975 knew how to draw an audience. She managed to squeeze her way through a few crew members to get a decent enough viewing point. Whenever she caught Matty’s gaze, he waved at her excitedly. She waved back, suddenly feeling a bout of nerves at the thought of finally watching him in action. Once the cameras were set up and all of the equipment had done one final round of checks, they launched into quite a boppy first song. She recognised this instantly as Tootime, as it had been her favourite of the singles that were released. He sounded a bit rusty and raw, which thankfully he could cover with the filter over his voice, but his enthusiasm to be performing again was unmistakable. The looks he was throwing to his band were nothing short of ecstatic, and despite being out of practice they played the song flawlessly. They finished up the first song, and he shrugged off his yellow jacket as they changed their gear over for the next two. Their little live set was only three songs long in the end, but they felt It’s Not Living and Sincerity Is Scary were excellent choices to best get across the vibe of the new album. After seeing what they could do in a tiny room with minimal fanfare, she was suddenly kicking herself for never getting out to one of their live shows.

  When they had wrapped up the set, Matty started packing away his gear before seeing her starting to leave. He quickly dropped what he was doing and called out to her to wait up. She turned to face him, as he suddenly realised that he hadn’t worked out what to actually say. “Look, I’m sorry about… how I’ve been lately.” He eventually settled on.

“It’s okay, you were going through a rough time.” She reassured him.

“I was,” He nodded, “but it’s not really an excuse.” He added with a sigh. “Can I take you out to lunch after this? To apologise properly.” He asked with a hopeful look.

“You don’t have to-” She started, before he interrupted.

“I know I don’t have to - I want to.” He corrected. She considered this offer for a moment. “Please?”

“Sure.” She nodded, trying to conceal her smile. “That’d be nice.”

  She waited patiently as he packed up his gear, feeling slightly awkward for loitering around a studio that wasn’t hers while she watched everyone else clear out. Once everything seemed fairly put away, he exchanged a quiet word with the band and walked over to where she was standing.

“Any preferences for where we eat? It’s your apology lunch, after all.” He said as he slipped his jacket back on.

She grimaced at his choice of words. “Don’t say it like that.”

“Why?” He laughed.

“It makes me feel worse than I already do.”

“Suppose we’ll just feel bad together, then.” He said as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and ushered her back out of the building. She couldn’t deny, it felt nice to be seeing Matty act more like he had when they’d first met. Whether that was because she enjoyed the attention or because it was nice to see her friend feeling more himself was up for debate.

  Due to neither of them being the one to want to make the call about where to eat, for fear of the other not enjoying it, they ended up going to the only place that served food within their direct eyeline – a bakery. It made her feel less like she was taking advantage too for him to only have to pay for pastries and coffee, not a proper fancy meal with drinks. They caught each other up on the fine points of their lives that they’d missed out on hearing over the last few years: highlights in careers, people who’d come and gone, other artists they’d met that had proved to be noteworthy (for good reasons and bad). It was incredibly reassuring for the both of them to know that conversation still flowed easily enough between them when they weren’t actively disliking each other.

“Sorry if the interview was a bit… too personal. We didn’t really talk about the record all that much, in the end.” She said, thinking back to how long they’d spent discussing his drug habits rather than his impending album release.

“Stop apologising.” He said around a mouthful of food. “I’m the one who’s supposed to be saying sorry. And I’m sure the fans would’ve liked it.” He shrugged.

“Yeah, but I don’t want to force stuff out of you for the sake of entertainment.”

“Like I said, I wouldn’t have answered if I didn’t want to.” He reminded her.

  He waited a beat, composing what he had originally wanted to say today before clearing his throat. “I really am sorry, you know. For how I left things.” He said as he stared down into his mug of tea.

“It’s genuinely okay, Matty.” She reassured him. “I wasn’t really any better.” She added under her breath.

“I was just a bit oblivious and hopeful when I fucked stuff up initially. I wanted to act like I hadn’t dropped off your radar for two years.” He admitted as he scratched at the side of his head. “If I’m honest, I was reaching out to get some support from an old mate in a time when I felt pretty overwhelmed by everything that was happening. But I went about it in all the wrong ways and just made it a whole lot worse.” He clarified with a dry laugh. As if she hadn’t already felt bad enough, now he tells her that she’d shut him out when he had been trying to ask for help? The guilt increased tenfold.

“Sorry.” She said. He was about to tell her off again for apologising, but she cut him off. “I was already pretty shitty that I hadn’t seen you in so long, so I was pretty quick to want to end that interaction when things started getting… difficult.” She explained.

  “Guess you live and learn, huh?” He said with a small smile. “At least we’re still mates now.” Hearing him say that helped ease a bit of her worry that she’d done as much to fuck things up as he had. At least now that it was all out in the open, they could move past it.

“Yeah.” She concurred, returning his smile. They finished up the pastries that Matty had bought before stepping out of the bakery. Both of them felt like a weight had been lifted now that they knew they hadn’t screwed stuff up for good between them. Having each said their piece, they were pretty confident that they could give friendship another shot.

“It was great to see you.” He said as he pulled her in for a hug tight enough that it almost made her lose her breath.

“Next time we’ll have to make sure it’s not so long.” She said as he moved back from the hug.

“We’ll keep in touch.” He agreed with a nod. “And I mean it this time.”

Taglist: @imagine-that-100 @ghostlightqueen @tooshhhy @robinrunsfiction @approved-by-dentists

Previous Chapter Next Chapter

#Matthew Healy x Reader #Matty Healy x Reader #Sunsetinymvein

[jazzicology]

JAZZPRING!

This will seem topsy-turvy to those of you in the Northern hemisphere - but in New Zealand, Spring is just around the corner. And here at Jazzicology headquarters in Queenstown, we’re busy preparing for our Spring jazz gigs. Putting together a set on a specific theme is a great incentive to search for and learn new material. Here’s our ‘Jazzpring’ setlist with some notes on each. We’ve aimed for a mix of tempos and contrasting jazz styles. In amongst some old standards are some quirky additions: possibly the only song written from the perspective of a frightened tomato (Hang on Little Tomato); and a wonderful number that perfectly sets Shakespeare’s ‘It was a lover and his lass’ to a catchy melody and jazz chords – it deserves to be in everyone’s Spring set list. I was amazed how many jazz songs there are on topics relating to Spring – far too many to include in just one gig!

Joyspring. 1954 composition by Clifford Brown, jazz trumpeter and a key figure in the Hard Bop movement. The lyrics I use are by Jezra Kay. This is a super-fast-paced, up-beat tune. I discovered, rather too late for this gig, that there are also some wonderfully poetic lyrics by Jon Hendricks, a leading jazz lyricist who is responsible for the lyrics for many well-known jazz songs composed as instrumentals. You can read about Hendrick’s lyrics for JoySpring here.

You must believe in Spring. Composed by Michel LeGrand (1964), this song shares some features with his other, better-known compositions (Windmills of Your Mind; What Are You Doing For The Rest of Your Life). The chords and melody strike a reflective and melancholy, yet hopeful, mood. It is a truly beautiful number that I had not previously been aware of. I have been listening to Bill Evans’s instrumental version of it – it just incredible - and this vocal performance by Sarah McKenzie. It was originally called La Chanson de Maxence and was written for the French film ‘Les Demoiselles de Rochefort’. Looking at the original French lyrics, it is clear the English lyrics are not a translation; the song’s theme of Spring is entirely attributable to the authors of the English language lyricists Bergman and Bergman. Indeed, these lyrics are so well crafted that it is difficult to believe the phrase ‘You Must Believe in Spring’ wasn’t originally in Le Grand’s mind when he wrote it! Listening to various vocal recordings over the last few weeks, I discovered some additional lyrics that, as far as I can tell, appear only in a recording by Barbra Streisand. I don’t know who wrote them (possibly Streisand), but they seem apt for a troubled world, so here they are for other singers who may be interested in using them:

When angry voices drown the music of the spheres 

And children face a world that’s far beyond their years 

Above the darkest skies, The far horizons lie 

With all the reasons why you must believe in Spring.

Spring can really hang you up the most. Composer Tommy Wolf (1955), lyrics Fran Landesman. Spring isn’t all rainbows and daffodils – like all fun times of year, for those who are down or lonely it can serve to underline your own misery. The title of the song is a jazz twist on the opening line of T.S. Eliot's The Waste Land: "April is the cruellest month". My favourite version of this song is by Carmen McCrae – it’s like a masterclass in jazz vocals. I was surprised how difficult this song was to learn – and was relieved to find an entire blog written about it, claiming that the obscene number of verses and lyrics, and wide vocal range and unusual phrasings are clearly the work of someone who hates singers! Fortunately, I love a challenge.

Blue Skies. Irving Berlin (1926). Blue Skies is probably the best-known and certainly the oldest song in this set. Thelonious Monk wrote a Be-Bop number, ‘Suddenly in Walked Bud’, based on the chord progressions in Blue Skies, as a tribute to his friend, the jazz pianist, Bud Powell. The lyrics are a virtual who’s-who list of jazz greats from that time. Monk’s ‘In Walked Bud’ is an example of a jazz ‘contrafact’: where a new melody is laid over existing chords (in this case, Blue Skies). There are lots of examples of this in Bop from the 1940s, because it was a way for jazz musicians to create new pieces “for performance and recording on which they could immediately improvise, without having to seek permission or pay publisher fees for copyrighted materials (while melodies can be copyrighted, the underlying harmonic structure cannot be)”. Since the lyrics and melody for ‘In Walked Bud’ work perfectly well over the chords for ‘Blue Skies’ (apart from the bridge) I’ll incorporate elements of them into our performance.

It might as well be Spring. Composed by Rodgers and Hammerstein (1945) for the movie State Fair, for which it won an Academy Award for best original song. Many people have recorded this, but I’ve been listening to Ella Fitzerald and this lovely French version by (the aptly Spring-named) Blossom Dearie.

They say its Spring. Composers Bob Haymes and Marty Clark (1950s). With a melody and lyrics that are as light and floaty as a feather, this is a quintessential Spring song about being in love. Blossom Dearie appears to have been the first to record it, in 1957.

Nature Boy/Nardis. Composed by Eden Ahbez (1947). Nature boy is on Jazzicology’s set list – but with a twist! We will perform it using the principal motif from Miles Davis’ Nardis in both the Intro and coda. This was an idea developed by me and UK jazz pianist Sid Thomas, and you can listen to Sid and I performing it here. The ‘back story’ to Nature Boy is pretty interesting in its own right and can be found in a previous Jazzicology blog penned by Sid, ‘The one hit wonders of jazz’.

I love Paris in the Springtime. Cole Porter (1954). A classic recording of this by Ella Fitzgerald. However, I very much like this version, which has a Parisian café feel. This is a relatively simple melody to learn, with the chief challenge for the vocalist being the wide vocal range needed to change register.

Timeless Place. Composed by Jimmy Rowles in the 1970s as an instrumental (‘The Peacocks’) and recorded by him and sax legend Stan Getz in the 1975 album of the same name. The wonderful, reflective lyrics were added much later by UK jazz vocalist, Norma Winstone, and included on her 1993 album Well Kept Secret. This song is technically very challenging for a vocalist: the melody over the ‘bridge’ is a little non-intuitive and sits outside the harmony – it creates a tension which resolves into the main refrain. The word Spring appears nowhere in the song, but I’m going to justify its inclusion here because the lyrics include a beautiful formal garden with flowers and trees.

Double Rainbow. Composed by Brazilian jazz maestro, Antonio Jobim in 1970. This is one of his lesser-known numbers. It perfectly captures a spring garden, after a sudden rain-shower, with rainbows, puddles and a little robin hopping about. Actually, because the song is written in Portugese, the little bird in the song is a chico-chico, so robin is used as the equivalent in the English translation (maybe I should use a bellbird instead?). In Portugese, the title is Chovendo na Roseira (the rain is falling on the roses) and I perform it using first the Portugese and then the English lyrics – both are lovely, and the different languages each lend a slightly different feel to song.

Hang on Little Tomato. Music and lyrics by Patrick Abbey, China Forbes and Thomas Lauderdale and released on the Pink Martini album of the same name in 2004. For those who have gotten their tomato seedlings off to an early start, this the song you need to sing to them when they get planted outside. It’s a scary world out there for a little tomato. It’s a seriously cute little song, and a reminder that we all need to keep hanging on to the vine. The song title is apparently a reference to a Hunt's Ketchup ad campaign "Hang On, Little Tomato!" in a 1964 issue of Life magazine. (Is it a coincidence that Pink Martini’s named their own record label Heinz, I wonder?)

Hey Nonny No! Composed by UK jazz composer and pianist Sid Thomas, this up-beat, toe-tappin’ number captures the feel of Spring brilliantly and the melody and chords provide a fabulous setting for Shakespeare’s ‘It was a lover and his lass’ from As you Like it. You’ll be humming this one on the way home.

Seed Leaves. Another Sid Thomas composition, this one setting to music the poem ‘Seed Leaves’ by Poet Laureate and two times Pulitzer Prize winner Richard Wilbur. You can find the poem here. Anyone wishing to request the music for ‘Hey Nonny No’ or ‘Seed Leaves’ can contact Sid Thomas here.

Surrey with the Fringe on top. Rogers and Hammerstein, from Oklahoma (1946). Is it a little bit twee? Maybe, but hey – it is also very sweet. And it was a part of Miles Davis’ repertoire in the 1950s, so there’s no arguing with that!

Up Jumped Spring. Composed by US jazz trumpet player Freddie Hubbard in 1962, and included in his album Backlash. The lyrics were added later by vocalist US jazz vocalist Abbey Lincoln. This clip of the song being sung live by Audrey Silver is really worth listening to - what a confident, flawless performance.

So, there you have it: an eclectic Spring jazz set involving Shakespeare, tomatoes, rainbows, birds, toads, seedlings, melting snow, new love and a little sprinkling of melancholy. The lyrics in this set contain the words ‘isinglass’ and ‘yggdrasil’ – not words you hear every day – come to our gig on September 5th (assuming Queenstown is out of lockdown by then!) and see if you can spot them!

Other suggestions for Spring songs can be found here: 

https://jazz.fm/classic-jazz-songs-about-spring/ 

https://www.wrti.org/post/10-jazz-tunes-remind-you-its-spring

Nance Wilson

Nance Wilson is one half of Queenstown-based jazz duo, Jazzicology, together with pianist Mark Rendall-Wilson. 

Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/nance-wilson-trio 

Facebook: Jazzicology

#jazzmusic #jazz vocals

[mirkwoodshewolf]

Legend of the band; AU Ghost! Queen x teen reader

*Author’s note*

Hey guys well this is a story that's been going through my head for a few days. I was originally gonna save this before Halloween but I figure I just go ahead and post this now in case I lost it amongst all my other writings in the near future. So background on this story it takes place in present day and the band members of Queen are ghosts.  Now I want to also put this out, I've inspired the ghosts designs from Guillermo Del Toro's film Crimson Peak. So just type in how the ghosts look and you'll see just why I've made the boys ghosts different colors.

Warnings: Swearing, death, slight attempted of assault (ALWAYS ASK PERMISSION BEFORE YOU TRY TO KISS SOMEONE), some horror elements?, fluff and angst.

*EDIT 7-27-20* NEW PARTS DOWN BELOW!!!

Part 2

Part 3

Taglist:

@plethora-of-things​

@waddles03​

@psychosupernatural​

@ixchel-9275​

@simonedk​

@platawnic​

@geek-and-proud​

@jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels​

@queendeakyy​

@queensdivas​

@kairosfreddie​

@eileen-crys​

_________________________________________________________

It started off as a dare-pact that my friends wanted to do.  Every year around Halloween we try to do some sort of Halloween dare together whether it was going to a graveyard, using a Ouija board, or crashing a Halloween party in one of the upper class neighborhoods dressed as monsters and scare the shit out of them.

It was either one person or we would do it as the entire group and this year we decided to do our next Halloween dare as a group.  The ringleader of the group Aaron gathered us up in our private clubhouse (his basement) and we were all gathered around to discuss just what we were going to do.

“Right, I call this meeting of the Halloween dare to order.” Aaron proclaimed.

“So what’s the plan for this year?” asked Brandon.

“How bout we go downtown and scare the little kids at the daycare during their Halloween party?” suggested Jake.

“No that’s just cruel even for us.” Said Amy.

“I agree.” I added. “Besides you just want to do that cause you’re little brother’s gonna be there, right?”

“So what? The little asshole got me into trouble last week. He deserves some payback.” Jake hissed.

“Alright Jake settle down. Okay so we had Amy and Susan do the Ouija board last year.”

“Which I still don’t forgive you guys. I swear I think my house is still haunted.” Susan said.

“Oh I’ve got it!” Proclaimed Brandon.

“Lay it on us Bran.” Aaron said.

“Three words for you guys. Rockfield. Farm. studios.” At that point everyone went silent.

“ARE YOU INSANE!?!?” exclaimed Amy.

“Yeah Brandon do you want to commit suicide or something!? Do you hate life!?” Jake snapped.

“Brandon, why in the fuck would you suggest that?” I asked.

“Oh come on! We’ve done practically the same stupid shit every time. Yeah sure the Ouija board could do some serious things but never have we actually tried to go to a real haunted house. So why not Rockfield farm?”

“Wait, I don’t get it. What’s Rockfield farm?” Susan asked.  Susan was the recent member to join the horror crew when she moved here from Michigan. Almost no one wanted to speak that was until I finally told her the legend.

“Rockfield farm was used as a recording studio a long time ago. Like back in the 70’s. Anyway there was this up and coming band called Queen. You know the ones who made the song Killer Queen?”

“Oh yeah my mom still has her vinyl record of that album.” Susan said.

“Well anyway, in the summer of 1975 they went to record their next record. Legend says it would’ve been their greatest album yet. It could’ve really made them even more famous than they were. But—an accident occurred at that farm.”

“What happened?” she asked.

“Well that’s where the story gets a little iffy. There have been several theories throughout time on what happened.” I explained.

“One theory is that an electrical fire happened while the band was in the studio, and they couldn’t escape in time and ended up being burned alive.” Jake said.

“Another theory is that someone broke into the property and slaughtered the band mates in their sleep.” Amy said.

“A slightly different version to that theory is that it was actually the band’s assistant that killed them in cold blood. Apparently he was in love with the front man. And in rejection he slaughtered the whole band before killing himself.”

“Whichever story you choose to believe in, it is said that the ghosts of the band members still haunt the property to this day. And anyone who has entered inside, is never seen again.” Aaron finished.

“Which is why not even I will go there.” Jake emphasized.

“Oh what’s wrong Jake? Don’t got the balls to make a drive up there and spend the night in the haunted farm?” teased Brandon.

“Shut up arsehole! At least I have balls.” Brandon was just about to pounce on Jake when Amy stopped the two of them by pushing Brandon back onto the floor and I said.

“Look, I thought it was foolish enough to go to the graveyard at night. But this—this is foolishness. No way am I gonna be possessed by a ghost or anything like that.”

“You know what you guys are all chicken!” Brandon exclaimed. “We’ve done almost every single Halloween dare known to man and you lot are scared to go to a little haunted house in the country and spend the night there.”

“He’s right.” Aaron finally spoke up.

“I’m sorry what?” Amy snapped.

“He’s right. We’ve been pulling out the same stuff every year but with different people. There’s no real haunted places here in the city but Rockfield is the closest thing we can get to.”

“Thank you!” Brandon exclaimed.

“Aaron, I swear to god if you make me go to that place we are finished! Do you hear me finished!” Amy snapped as she walked right up towards her boyfriend of 3 years.

“Sorry babe, I’ve made my mind up. We’ll leave in 2 days. Meeting adjourned.” Oh god what has Brandon done?

Later that night I was staring up at the full moon from my window when my nana came in.

“I thought I had told you to go to bed sweetheart. You’ve got school in the morning.”

“Couldn’t sleep nana.” I said solemnly.

“Alright, what’s wrong?” she said as she came up and sat down next to me.

“Just something my friends want me to do.”

“Those troublemakers that always make you trespass on private property? Or crash a party? Honestly (y/n) I don’t know why you hang out with kids like that.”

“They’re my friends nana. They always got my back when I need them.” She sighed and surrendered.

“Alright, alright. But what’s gotten you so rattled up?” now I couldn’t really tell her just what was going on.  She’d never let me go on a road trip to Rockfield farm so I had to think of something.

“They—they suggested going on a trip and…..I don’t like to leave you alone.” She smiled at me and tucked a strand of hair.

“Oh poppet. I maybe old but I’m not frail. How long are you planning on leaving?”

“It’s just for Halloween. We’ll be back the next day.”

“Okay then. Now even though I don’t approve of your friends behavior, I can’t stop you from going out Halloween night. Just promise you’ll stay out of trouble.”

“I will.” That’s a promise that not even I know how to keep. “And you’re sure you’ll be fine?”

“Yes, yes. And don’t worry, your father won’t hear a thing from me.”

“Really?”

“I’m his mother. I don’t have to tell him anything.” She winked at me. “Now go to sleep.” She lectured me before giving me a kiss goodnight and we both told each other I love you.

Two days later it was time.  Right after school, we all piled in Brandon’s RV and we drove the long drive to the country side to Rockfield studios.  Just as the sun was about to set, we finally arrived at the farm.

God it looks even more desolated and frightening than the pictures.  The entire housing was swamped with vines, weeds, and any other ounce that Mother Nature could throw at it.  The bricks at certain spots were chipped away or even rotting away (how that’s possible I don’t know).

We slowly walked up towards the main house and we just stood before it fearfully.

“Whose gonna go in first?” Amy asked.

“I vote our raining president of this idea Brandon.” Jake said.

“I second that.” Amy replied.

“Ditto.” Said Susan.

“Fine I’ll go in first.” Brandon said as he walked up the steps of the deck before standing before the front door.  He just stood there, still as a statue before Jake cried out.

“Well go on smartass and go in already!”

“I’m going I’m going!” Brandon snapped back.  He took the door handle and slowly opened the door which made an eerie creaking sound. He took one small step into the house before he was suddenly pulled in.

“BRANDON!” we all cried out.  Soon we all piled into the house and it was so dark you could barely make out what was in front of you.  The door suddenly slammed loudly behind us which made a few of us jump.

“Come on Brandon, this isn’t funny!” Jake called out.

“Brandon?” Aaron spoke up.

“Brandon seriously if this is a joke it’s not AHHH!!!” Amy spoke before suddenly screaming as something grabbed her.  We all soon began screaming before a laugh rang out.  Coming out from underneath a white sheet was Brandon.

“You guys should’ve seen your faces!” he laughed.

“You sick fuck who does that!?” Amy said as she began to punch him as hard as she could.

“That wasn’t funny Brandon.” I scowled.

“It was pretty funny!”

“Guys I think I found the light’s switch.” Susan said as she then flipped a switch on and soon the lights came on.

“Okay so we’re here now. Why not have a look around?” Brandon suggested.

“Man do you not know your horror film goofs!? If we split up, the ghosts will hunt us down one. By. one. Starting with the good looking comedy relief guy, me!” Jake proclaimed.

“Get a grip Jake! We’ll split up into pairs. Amy and I will go together and take the barn. (Y/n) you and Susan…..”

“Oh hell no. I can’t even stand to be near Brandon right now!”

“Oh what you a wittle scaredy cat Jakey-wakey?” Brandon teased.

“SHUT UP!!!”

“Alright! Jake you and (Y/n) go take the living room, and Susan you and Brandon can take the upstairs.” Aaron said breaking up the fight with the boys.  I rolled my eyes cause I knew Jake was gonna try to flirt around with me (he’s been doing that since the start of secondary school).

“I can dig with that.” Jake said as he came right up beside me.

“Do you seriously hate me Aaron?” I muttered before we finally split up.

Jake and I came to the living room and saw a small piano right there in the middle of the room, and jointed next to the living room was the kitchen.

“Pretty spooky huh? Just imagine if this piano started playing on its own. But no worries (Y/n), if you get scared you can hold onto me and I’ll protect you.”

“My hero.” I muttered sarcastically.  It was then something caught my eye.  I walked towards a table to see what looked like an old photo album.  I blew away the dust and wiped the cover to see the writing say.

PROGRESS ON LATEST ALBUM

“Whatcha got there?” Jake said as he came up to me and shined his phone flashlight down on the photo album.

“It’s an old photo album book.” Jake scoffed.

“Wow. The only person who has stuff like that are my parents. Man thank god we have technology nowadays. Otherwise no one would get to see my handsome face.” Why does this man even exist? Seriously I don’t see why all the girls on the cheer squad go for him?

“And what a shame that would’ve been.” I muttered as I opened the book up.

“I know right?!” I turned the next page and there were a few photos of Queen inside a recording studio of sorts and below it a caption that spelled,

AT HARD WORK WITH THE LADS. R.M.T.

“What does RMT stand for?”

“I don’t know. Could be some sort of acronym or something. Maybe initials for a name.”

“Well you’re an expert on all those old guys that existed back in the Medieval ages. What were the names of the band that died here?”

“It wasn’t the Medieval ages Jake. It was 40 years ago. And I don’t really know their names. I just know them as Queen.” I flipped to the next page to see a man with long black hair at the piano and the caption under that said.

FRED AT PIANO - Bri.

“Fred huh? He doesn’t look like a Fred to me. And who signs off with Bri?” I shook my head and continued to flip through the pages.  Each picture were of the band doing certain things while recording or just being around the farm, and each picture was signed with initials RMT, JD, FM, or BRI.  Finally the last picture was all four of them together.

“Check out the date.” I said.  In the picture it read 8-13-75. “This was taken the day when the band died.”

“Holy shit you’re right. They must’ve taken this picture just before whatever happened, happened.”

“They look so young.” I said solemnly.

“Yeah. But if they had lived they’d be like—our grandparents by now.” Suddenly I heard a voice.

No wait it was—singing.  I looked around trying to find out where the singing was coming from.  It was—beautiful. Hypnotic almost.  It was the most beautiful sound I ever heard.

“(/n). (Y/n)! Oi (Y/n)!” I was snapped out of it by Jake. “Jesus you looked like you were in a trance or something.”

“Was I? Sorry I….”

“No need to apologize. Hell if it was all about me, then maybe I’ll let it slid.” He said as he stroked up my arm.

“Jake! I’ve tried to let you down easy but please for the last time. I don’t like you that way! So stop with the flirting!”

“Oh c’mon (Y/n). What is there about me that you don’t like?” Gee where do I begin? “C’mon just give me a chance.” He walked closer to me but I tried to push him away.

“No Jake stop! Back off!” suddenly the fireplace just a few feet away from us ignited.  The flames reached as high as they could and call my crazy but I thought I could see someone’s face in the fire.  Jake jumped away from me and that’s when we heard the piano being played.

Play video

It was a random play on the keys at a very fast pace on the upper keys while also hitting a couple of the lower keys every now and then.  

“What the f—” the piano then hit a single key for a couple of beats before finally changing tune to that of a marching tune.  Like someone was coming towards you and you could just hear the beat of their footsteps.

Getting freaked out by the piano, Jake ran screaming out of the living room while I was just frozen in place.  The fireplace suddenly turned off but there was still some sort of light.  I slowly turned around and saw a yellow light ball shining right there.  But it wasn’t just some random ball or something.

This was some sort of spiritual ball because I could see smoke slowly dancing around it as it floated before me.  I wanted to run but I was either too scared or stunned by what just happened.  It was then I heard the singing come back, and it was coming from this spiritual matter in front of me.

And I don’t know how or why but—it made me feel safe.  Listening to the singing that came from this ball, it was like being wrapped up tightly in a warm hug.  Or sleeping in your own bed, like the weight of the world has been dropped from you.

I soon found myself walking towards the yellow spirit ball.  It moved backwards as I walked towards it.  It floated towards the fireplace and I wouldn’t have known if I weren’t in my trance-like state once again, but the fireplace opened up to reveal a long corridor.

*3rd Person POV*

As Jake ran on ahead he soon tackled into someone and that someone ended up being Amy.

“What the hell Jake!? Get off me you perv!”

“Guys! Guys! Guys! P-p-p-p-pi….pi-gh…..(y/n)…..”

“Stop your blabbering and tell us what happened!?” Aaron said as he forced Jake off his girlfriend and helped her up.

“Piano……playing itself. Fireplace……flames go up.”

“What’s he blabbering about?” Brandon’s voice soon spoke up as he and Susan came around the hallway.

“Where’s (Y/n)?” Susan asked worriedly.  They all looked at Jake who still had a look of fright on his face.  They quickly raced towards the living room and they all gasped to see (Y/n) just about to turn right of the long corridor that stood them.

“What the hell!”

“Why did you leave her you dumbass!?”

“(Y/n)!” her friends tried to run after her but the fireplace soon closed back up and the flames were once again fully ignited.  Soon coming out of the flames was a pure white figure.

His hair was all curly and long like a poodle.  He wore a few necklaces 2-3 which were wrapped around his neck while the other one draped over his bare chest due to his shirt having a few of the buttons undone. But what had the kids most horrified was that this man was transparent.

Gentle wisps of smoke flowed from his hair, fingers, and even the cut along his cheek which seeped out small amounts of ghost blood.  His eyes which were a pure dark grey stared right at the young teenagers and he let out a haunting whisper.

“She belongs……to us!” at that phrase the teens all screamed and ran off.  The girls ran towards the backway while the boys ran up the stairs.  The girls raced out towards the barn and hid underneath a hay cart.

“Was that a……” Susan started off.

“No! It couldn’t have been! It’s impossible!” Amy exclaimed in denial.

“Oh it’s entirely possible.” A male voice soon spoke up.  They slowly turned their heads and saw another ghost.

Unlike the one they saw earlier, this one was a blue spirit with haunting ocean like eyes.  His hair was long and flowing and he wore a smug grin on his face.  Susan and Amy were in gawk at this ghost. “Now, now ladies I know I’m a looker but there’s no need to stare.”

They then screamed as they tried to get out but just before they could leave the barn, the doors suddenly shut.

“Leaving so soon? Oh that’s not fair. Not before I’ve had the chance to know your names. God it’s been so long since female company have come to this farm.” Susan and Amy were terrified at the point.  They tried to get the doors open but it was all in vain.  

Suddenly they felt themselves being levitated up in the air and the ghost appeared before them and said in a low, haunting tone.

“And the three of us are gonna have such fun together.” Only the piercing, terrified screams of the girls echoed through the barn.

Back in the house, Brandon, Jake and Aaron all headed for the basement in one of the tightest rooms the house had.  They all panted heavily and Aaron said.

“Did—you guys see what I saw?”

“You mean that curly haired ghost that just said (Y/n) belongs to them. No.” Brandon said.

“Same.” Jake said. The room suddenly got colder than it was, so cold in fact that the boys could now see their breath.  It was then Jake suddenly felt something pick him up by his throat.  He squirmed in the grip of the invisible force.

“Jake!” Aaron called out but then suddenly he and Brandon were pushed up against the wall and they couldn’t move.  No matter how much they squirmed, they couldn’t budge an inch.  Suddenly Jake was thrown down onto the small rickety bed and that’s when he appeared.

A fully black ghost with long hair.  He looked younger than the last ghost they saw but there was something about him that felt—angry.  The young black ghost turned to Jake and his voice which was a soft, honey like tone say.

“If I remember, No always means No. No matter who it is.” He slowly crawled on top of Jake pinning his arms down. “But since you can’t seem to understand what it feels like to be in such a vulnerable position, maybe I should show you.” by the end of his statement his voice suddenly got lower, darker.  Almost sinister.

Through Jake’s eyes he saw as this ghost’s face actually morphed into the Devil himself. Burned and scarred with pure red and black eyes.  Jake screamed in pure terror.

*My POV*

I kept following the light as well as the voice.  The beautiful, soulful, most angelic voice.  God it was—almost inhuman of how this voice could sing.  With such gentleness but also control it when he belted out a note or a phrase.

The light ball quickly faded away and had now become a record player with an album that stood right up against it.  I slowly reached out for it and it read.

QUEEN

A NIGHT AT THE OPERA.

As I held it in my hands there was a moment where I heard screaming.  Wait my friends? They were……

“Play the record darling.” The voice soothed me.  I felt a gentle caress under my chin.  I closed my eyes and took out the record and placed it on the record player. “Play it, play it. You know you want to.” The voice continued to coo.  I turned the record on, lifted the needle but just before I could place it at the top the voice whispered to me again, “Lower.”

I adjusted the needle as the voice continued to whisper lower again and again softly in my ear.

“There!” it suddenly hissed out which frightened me and forced me to let go of the needle and soon a quartet of voices soon began to sing with no instrument backup.

Play video

My god. This……this really was Queen.  I mean I’ve only really heard a few of their songs but this was definitely them.  The way their voices melded together in perfect harmony.  The piano soon came in and I sat down by the record player and just took in this song.

I literally felt like my soul was being sucked out as the vocals took me on a trip.  Then the bass picked up as the leading front man started singing the song, the very voice I’ve been hearing from the spirit force earlier.

As the song continued to play and went on a brief instrumental break, I looked at the record to see just what this song was called because I hadn’t heard a single word that stands out except Mama.  I then saw a finger point to the second to last song.  I looked up and shocked to see one of the band member’s ghost right there with me.

His entire ghost form was the same yellow color as the spirit ball from earlier, his wild hair went down to shoulders and he had an overbite but somehow it worked on him. He looked pretty exotic (by that I knew he wasn’t from London, maybe India or something).  He nodded and gestured to the song again.  I looked down at it and read it out loud.

“Bohemian Rhapsody?” he smiled happily and soon a guitar solo came on.  But along with that, I heard the same guitar playing the same notes, almost as if—holy shit!

A curly haired pure white ghost soon held a red guitar and began playing the exact guitar solo right there.  I turned to the ghost beside me who was still smiling devilishly and he gestured for me to look back at the guitarist.  As I watched the white ghost play the guitar, I was amazed and mesmerized by how he played the guitar.

As a Classic Rock fan I’ve seen the greatest guitar players such as Hendrix, Eric Clapton, Alex Lifeson, and Eddie Van Halen, but this guy—this was unlike anything I’ve ever seen a guitarist do or even play.  It was like his guitar was actually singing a solo, instead of just being an instrument.  Like it was a person, and she sang beautifully.

The song then went quiet as the lights went out and only a single piano note was now playing over and over.  Soon the silhouette of the ghost that led me here stood before me as a single spotlight hit him.  And I don’t know whether the vocals suddenly turned off or whatever but I could actually hear singing right there.

Next thing I know, the yellow and white ghosts are now joined up with a soft blue and pure black ghost.  The four of them standing together in like a diamond shape patter with the yellow and white ghost at top and bottom respectively, the blue ghost was on my right while the black was on the left.  

The four of them once again jointed in a quartet harmony before suddenly their voices boomed out like a canon firing.  And I know it sounds crazy but I swear I think they duplicated themselves about a dozen times to get that full powerful choir sound.  The blue ghost then started to sing in a really high falsetto tone while the yellow ghost backed him up on the lower range before making his voice waver.

This pattern continued as the front man sung again softly and then the other three ghosts (or copies) backed him up.  Wow this song it’s—literally unlike anything I’ve ever seen before.  The way it started soft before BAM exploding right in your face. Just like an Opera.

I bopped my head along to the beat softly to the beat and then when the rock out section came on. I’ll admit I banged my head as hard as I could (may come to regret it later but I didn’t care).  The setting soon changed to an actual rock and roll concert stage and I saw all four of them up on the stage.  

The black ghost on bass, the blue playing the drums, the white playing his guitar and the yellow one center stage, well more like everywhere as he strutted around and sung as loudly as he could.

I smiled and stood up and couldn’t help but jump up and down as I rocked out along with them. The yellow ghost soon went back to the piano and began playing it and as the four ghosts vocalized softly, the song slowly died off the hard rock and grew soft once again.  The yellow ghost sang the last verse as the piano solely took over now just before the white ghost played his guitar for the last time.

Then when the soft bang of a gong, the song ended and the room went dark once more.

“That’s it? Oh come on please that can’t be the end of the song!” the lights soon came back on and I now found myself in a recording studio.  The four ghosts all standing there.  The yellow one came up to me with a soft smile and gently touched the center of my forehead with his index and tall fingers and I felt this warmth come over my yet again.

“We’ve got more songs than that dear, believe me. But this is the one we’re most proudest of.” His normal voice spoke to me.  

“It was either that or I’m in love with my car.” The white ghost groaned out.

“I told you before Brian it’s a metaphor!” the blue ghost snapped.

“After all these years Roger it’s still unusual. What exactly are you doing to that car?” the black ghost sassed.

“Ignore him darling. He’s just a little peeved that after all the fussing and locking himself in a cupboard, his song didn’t get the chance to go on the B side to our single. Which is my masterpiece.” The yellow ghost told me.

“Umm…..not to sound cruel but, I mean I know you guys are Queen but uhh—what are your names?”

“Oh yes that. Silly me. You my darling may call me Freddie Mercury.” The yellow ghost introduced himself with a twirl.

“Brian May. Thank you again for giving us a chance to show you our hard work.” The white ghost introduced himself.  Wow he sure was polite.

“Roger Taylor. And I must say my dear, you are quite adorable, especially when you let loose and rock out.” The blue ghost gave me a wink.  Normally I wouldn’t give flirting a second glance, especially after Jake’s insistent flirting, but for some reason I couldn’t help but blush at his compliment.

“Please forgive him. He always goes crazy over a pretty girl. John Deacon it’s lovely to meet you.” The black ghost said as he gave me a greeting bow of his head.  Freddie, Brian, Roger and John, these guys were the men behind Queen.

“It’s—an honor to meet you four. I’m (Y/n). So—all the times people have been coming into the studio, all you wanted was for someone to listen to your album?”

“Yes, but no one would stick around. All because we’re ghosts.” Freddie whined as he pouted and crossed his arms over his chest.

“And you were the only one who had any sense of musical taste.” Roger pointed out my Hendrix shirt.  I rubbed the back of my neck and said.

“Yeah, kinda a music geek. Mostly through classic rock. But none of my friends—oh my god my friends! What did—those screams from earlier. What did you guys do to them?!”

“Take it easy lovie, your friends are safe and unharmed.” Roger assured me.

“Really?”

“Yes. I mean minus the fright we might’ve caused them, they’re completely fine. They’re passed out in that van of yours outside right now.” Brian said.

“Though Deacy dear, I must admit you truly traumatized that one young boy earlier. I could barely keep my hold on (Y/n)’s mind to bring her here cause of the screaming you had that boy doing.” Freddie said.

“Who? You mean Jake?” I asked.

“What he did to you back there. It—wasn’t right. If a woman says no, it means no.” John growled softly.

“Thanks John. I’ve tried telling him for years I never once liked him like that, but any chance we’re alone he tries to come onto me. I was getting sick and tired of it.”

“Well not to worries dear, I think from what John did to him, he’ll never bother you again for a long time.” Roger said as he ruffled John’s hair up.  John pushed his hand off his head and he came up to me and asked.

“You sure he didn’t hurt you?”

“I’m fine, really. I’m okay.” He sighed in relief.

“Hey guys,” they all looked at me giving me their full attention. “I—I don’t mean to get personal with you all. But uhh……How did you guys…..forget it. You don’t have to answer it. It’s probably none of my business.”

“It’s not? Then why so interested?” asked Brian.  He didn’t ask it out of annoyance, I could genuinely hear the concern in his voice.

“Well I was gonna ask, how did you guys—you know……”

“Die?” they all said together.  I nodded.

“Well dear as much as we would like to tell you, we can’t.” Freddie said.

“Yeah I get it. I mean if I were in your shoes I wouldn’t either.”

“It’s not that (Y/n).” John said.  I looked at him confused, “See while we remember some parts of our lives as humans. The day we died—that part’s fuzzy.”

“For decades we’ve tried to remember what had happened but every time we try it just—doesn’t come around.” Brian finished.  Oh wow I never knew that that could happen when you become a ghost.  Not knowing how you die and have to remain here on Earth.

“Tell us dear, what all has been said about our deaths?” Freddie asked me as he leaned sat down on the chair and rest his chin on his hand.

“Well there are several theories. The ones I know about are an electrical fire in this studio and you guys being trapped inside.”

“Sounds boring.” Freddie bluntly stated.  The other three looked at him questioningly.

“What else?” asked Roger.

“Well another theory is that someone snuck in and massacred you guys. Some people even go into detail about the homicide and what happened to each of you. I—I was honestly heartbroken hearing that and cried.”

“Aww you sweet thing.” Freddie and Roger cooed.

“A slight alteration to that theory is that it was a—day to day manager you guys had was the one to kill you guys.”

“Oh him. Well we’re proud to say he’s no longer with us anymore.” Roger said.

“I think I remember that he also died along with us. And if he did, he’s right where he belongs cause we haven’t seen him since our death. Thank god.” said John.  I softly smiled before letting out a soft yawn.

“It’s getting late, you should get some sleep.” Brian said to me.

“Where can I sleep at?” I asked.

“You could pick one of our old rooms.” Roger suggested.

“Just hope you don’t mind sleeping on rickety old beds.” Brian softly laughed.  I softly laughed and said.

“Okay uhh…..John do you mind if I take yours?”

“Not at all. Follow me.” I followed behind him and we walked out of the recording studio and back to the main house.  He walked down the steps to the basement and he said, “Just a word of warning, it’s small and it gets colder than the other rooms. You sure you still want it?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine.” We came to the bottom of the steps and I saw that it was indeed a tiny room. Kinda reminded me of my childhood room when my parents and I were living in a small flat.

“Again I apologize, I didn’t choose this room. Yet I’m bound to it for all eternity.” He said as he placed his hand on the dresser but it went right through it. “Kinda the price for being the youngest and most forgetful member of the band.”

“I never thought that.” He turned towards me. “From the songs I’ve heard on your three albums, your basslines are unique and easily recognizable. Especially this one song uhh—god it’s been awhile since I listened to it what’s it called…..Lies?”

“Liar?”

“That’s it! That solo is phenomenal.” He softly smiled and thanked me.  I walked towards the small bed and tucked myself in suddenly feeling tired than I was before.

“Thanks again for allowing me to take your room tonight John.”

“Anytime. Sleep well (y/n).” I then shut my eyes and finally fell asleep.

*John’s POV*

I don’t know how to explain it.  Normally I’d never allow anyone to try and sleep in my room.  All the humans that have entered this farm whether on a dare or trying to discover the secrets of this place, I’ve made sure to keep out anyone by frightening them away.

But this young girl there was something—familiar about her.  Was she—no. No that’s impossible.  I’m crazy for even suggesting it, there’s no way that’s possible.  It’s a one in a billion chances.  I sat there in the corner of my room and watched her sleep, while trying to make sense on why I’m feeling this strange pull towards her.

*My POV*

2 weeks after that night, the guys actually gave me the Night at the Opera record and I was just amazed by all the songs it had, but my favorite song will always be Bohemian Rhapsody.  But there was another song called ‘You’re my best friend’ (written by John) that had a special connection with me.

Right now I was helping my nana with some reorganizing in the attic when I came across an old box of stuff.  I opened it up and was first greeted with some dust.  I let out a sneeze as I wiped the dust out of my face before pulling out a beautiful wedding dress.

“Nana! What’s this?” she climbed up the stairs and when she saw me, her face grew solemn. She walked up towards me and knelt down beside me.

“Now this is something I haven’t seen in years. This—was my wedding dress.”

“It’s beautiful.” I said as I stroked through the fabric.

“Yeah. But oh did I look like a balloon in it. I was pregnant with your father at the time I got married.” She went through the box and soon pulled out a photo album and opened it up. “See, this was me on my wedding day with—with your grandfather.” I looked down and I was shocked.

There was her and John standing together.  The two of them smiling as the picture was being taken.  Her back to John’s chest and his arms wrapped around her pregnant stomach.

“It was a surprise, the pregnancy. And we were incredibly young but—John praised about becoming a father. But then…….” She stopped and wiped away her tears.

“Nana are—are you okay?” she sniffled and dabbed her eyes and said.

“Yes. Yes poppet I’ll be okay. Sorry. It’s just—so hard, even after over 40 years. He was my best friend, the love of my life. I wish your father talked more about your grandfather to you. Oh he would’ve loved you soo much dear. Spoiled you rotten probably.”

Oh if only she knew. Wow so—my grandfather is John Deacon. Wow that’s—not everyone can say something like that.

“What….what was grandfather like?” I asked her.

“Well, we met way back in 1974 at a Disco club. My friends and I were out for a girls night out when—” she then proceeded to tell me the entire story of how she and granddad met and fell in love.

Hearing it from her own voice, it was like something out of a fairytale.  She and John really did love each other and it seemed like they would’ve stayed together forever had what happened to Queen not occurred.

“Did—the police ever tell you what happened?” I asked her.

“For years I tried to get them to give me an answer. But the case went cold and they just ruled it as accidental. I had to live with that heartbreak ever since. So I raised your father as a single parent because there wasn’t anyone like John Richard Deacon.” I leaned against her shoulder nuzzling her arm.

She wrapped her arm around my head and gave me a soft kiss to my head.  Together the two of us sat there and she told me as many stories as she could remember between her and John.

#bohemian rhapsody #bohemian rhapsody movie #bohemian rhapsody imagines #bohemian rhapsody fanfiction #bohemian rhapsody imagine #bohemian rhapsody x reader #queen #queen band #queen fanfic #queen fanfiction #queen imagine #queen imagines #roger taylor #freddie mercury #john deacon #brian may #brian may x reader #john deacon x reader #freddie mercury x reder #roger taylor x reader #ben hardy!roger taylor x reader #ben hardy!roger taylor #joe mazzello!john deacon #joe mazzello!john deacon x reader #gwilym lee!brian may #gwilym lee!brian may x reader #rami malek!freddie mercury x reader #rami malek!freddie mercury #70s queen

[nerianasims]

Billboard #1s 1977

Under the cut.

Marilyn McCoo & Billy Davis, Jr. – “You Don’t Have To Be A Star (To Be In My Show)” -- January 8, 1977

They will be happy with each other as they are, not needing a "star." It sounds literal, like they think most people only want to have relationships with celebrities. It's got some bounce and a beat, but it's very light and not poetic at all. Meh.

Leo Sayer – “You Make Me Feel Like Dancing” -- January 15, 1977

Shouty falsetto. It might be disco if it were faster. I am not listening to this whole thing, because it will give me a headache.

Stevie Wonder – “I Wish” -- January 22, 1977

One of the greatest musical intros. It's a funk song about nostalgia, wishing for childhood again, and I normally hate that. But the music is amazing.

Rose Royce – “Car Wash” -- January 29, 1977

This was an intro song for a movie of the same name. I had no idea. I just thought someone decided to sing about working at a car wash randomly. The song is a little bit Motown, a little bit disco. It's fun.

Mary MacGregor – “Torn Between Two Lovers” -- February 5, 1977

It's slow, it's soppy, and it's about how she's cheating on "you" with someone else. She truly loves you, but she's not gonna stop seeing the other guy, whom she loves too. It sounds like she wants to try this whole poly thing she's heard about. But is the guy she's singing to gonna be okay with that? Probably not. Most people aren't. Maybe though. I don't care. For being about a subject that should be heartrending, this song sure is boring.

Manfred Mann’s Earth Band – “Blinded By The Light” -- February 19, 1977

This version made it to #1. Bruce Springsteen's original didn't even make it to the charts. This version is really bad -- it sounds like a recitation surrounded by goop, not a song. Bruce Springsteen's version is one of my favorite songs. I am going to sulk now.

Eagles – “New Kid In Town” -- February 26, 1977

Huh, an Eagles hit I've never heard before. This is about fame, how everyone loves you at first, then forgets you when the next big thing comes along. They try to shoehorn some stuff about romance in -- "Will she still love you when you're not around?" -- but it doesn't really flow. Also the song sounds like it should be playing in the background of a cabana. Fittingly for a song worried people will forget them, I have already forgotten this song.

Barbra Streisand – “Love Theme From A Star Is Born (Evergreen)” -- March 5, 1977

I listened to this song for 30 seconds. No more. I cannot stand Barbra Streisand. I don't think I'd like this song anyway, as it's glop, but maybe a different singer could have made it tolerable.

Daryl Hall & John Oates – “Rich Girl” -- March 26, 1977

Rich girls get picked on while rich boys are the ones who usually get away with everything. This song was actually originally about a rich guy, too. It would have been better. It's still good musically, but it misses the mark. Not that rich girls don't also get away with plenty, but compare and contrast what happened to Paris Hilton for her venial sins, versus the entire existence of Donald Trump.

ABBA – “Dancing Queen” -- April 9, 1977

ABBA was a good group. They were hated on, and now they're more likely to be exalted. They didn't deserve the hate (save it for the Bee Gees), but they're not the second coming or anything either. They were just a good, fun group. This song can be danced to, but it's a song more about dance than a dancing song. It's a rare song observing a young woman dancing while identifying with her, rather than lusting after her. "You can dance/ You can jive/ Having the time of your life." It's good.

David Soul – “Don’t Give Up On Us” -- April 16, 1977

The narrator did something really bad last night. Cheating? Worse? Now he's telling his lover not to "give up on us." As soft as the song is, "tell" is the word, not "ask." And he doesn't apologize once. Also, David Soul was a professional actor, but there's no worry in his voice; he's nothing but smooth and assured here. Blech.

Thelma Houston – “Don’t Leave Me This Way” -- April 23, 1977

It's disco with a large dose of Motown, or Motown with a large dose of disco. Either way, it works. Everything lines up with precision, and then Thelma Houston comes in over all of it with huge emotion. The contrast is sort of fascinating. Oh, and her huge emotion is that she wants sex. "Then come on, satisfy the need in me/ 'Cause only your good loving can set me free." She's not begging, but she's not exactly commanding either. It's really good.

Glen Campbell – “Southern Nights” -- April 30, 1977

It's Kidz Bop honky tonk. That's probably not fair; Glen Campbell grew up in a family of poor sharecroppers in Arkansas. But it's what I hear. It's happy clappy, and scrubbed clean of anything real.

Eagles – “Hotel California” -- May 7, 1977

Whatever you think this song is about, it's not about that. The Eagles wrote it with a mish-mash of stuff in mind, but mostly trying to be ambiguous. What that means is that whatever you think this song is about, it is about that. It's a choose your own adventure psychological horror song. I love it. It makes me happy in that way that good poetry and good music do -- and this is both.

Leo Sayer – “When I Need You” -- May 14, 1977

This song is cheese. Absolute, unadulterated cheese. But it's not bad cheese. It's a good solid cheddar. It's slow but not too slow, soft but not too soft, and it manages some interesting percussion. And Sayer sings like he means it. It's about missing his lover while he's on the road, and he imagines she's with him to get by. "When I need you/ I just close my eyes and I'm with you." It sounds kind of like a Broadway ballad. It's enjoyable.

Stevie Wonder – “Sir Duke” -- May 21, 1977

A song about Duke Ellington, which is a subject I approve of. Stevie Wonder also lists a few more legends, including one of my favorites: "And with a voice like Ella's ringing out/ There's no way the band can lose." It's a love song to music itself. It's sort of big band, sort of funk, and sort of Motown, and it works. The lyrics do get too repetitive for me near the end, though.

KC & The Sunshine Band – “I’m Your Boogie Man” -- June 11, 1977

It's a wordplay on the "bogie man" monster. But the boogie man wants to show up and give you whatever you want whenever you want however you want. Sexually. The song actually has more lyrics than most KC & The Sunshine Band songs, but it's still a song to dance to. Not to have sex to. But for dancing? Yep, it's good.

Fleetwood Mac – “Dreams” -- June 18, 1977

YAY! Okay so I have no interest in Fleetwood Mac without Lindsay Buckingham and Stevie Nicks. But when they joined in 1975, Fleetwood Mac became truly great. And this song is from Rumours, which is their best album (forged out of a hell of a lot of intragroup pain), and written and sung by Stevie Nicks, who was their best artist. My parents played this record and their previous self-titled one all the time. I didn't fully understand the songs when I was a kid, but I loved them. As I grew old enough to understand them, I loved them more. And now I love them more than that. I can't analyze this song. I love it too much.

Marvin Gaye – “Got To Give It Up (Part 1)” -- June 25, 1977

At first, he was uncomfortable at parties and didn't want to dance. But then he loosened up enough to dance, pretty obviously as a way to pick up chicks. There's the horrible line "Let me step into your erotic zone." The music is experimental. Marvin Gaye's falsetto is fine, but it's still a falsetto the whole damn song. And there are people making party noises in the background the whole time. I find this song painful.

Bill Conti – “Gonna Fly Now (Theme From Rocky) -- July 2, 1977

You know this instrumental, you've heard it tons. It's a good movie theme -- I think. It's hard to say, when it's something that's been so often present in so many different contexts in my life.

Alan O’Day – “Undercover Angel” -- July 9, 1977

The undercover angel is a make believe woman from a sex dream. At the end of the song, he's telling "you" that you remind him of the undercover angel, so you must be meant to be with him. It's an extended "I've seen you in my dreams" pickup line. It's so dumb.

Shaun Cassidy – “Da Doo Ron Ron” -- July 16, 1977

This is an excruciatingly boring cover of The Crystals' classic 60s girl group song.

Barry Manilow – “Looks Like We Made It” -- July 23, 1977

He's singing to an ex. They both "made it" because they found other people. Until "Looks like we made it/ Or I thought so till today/ Until you were there everywhere." If they get back together it's not going to be easy, because they'll be leaving relationships that seem happy. I don't think they'll get back together -- besides, she may not feel anything for him any more. It's a more complex song than it sounds. And Barry Manilow sure can sing. I wish he'd gone with the jazz songs he preferred, but then he wouldn't have been hugely successful. He decided to pull the rhinestone cowboy trick, and I can't blame him. He did make the soppy 70s charts more tolerable than they would have otherwise been.

Andy Gibb – “I Just Want To Be Your Everything” -- July 30, 1977

For instance, without Barry Manilow, Andy Gibb would probably have had more hits. Gibb's voice is thin. If you're going to sing a line like "Oh, if I, if I stay here without you darlin' I will die," you need some power and drama behind it. This guy sounds like he's trying to sell kitchen tile. It's a relatively fast song, but the beat is somehow irritating too. Blech.

The Emotions – “Best Of My Love” -- August 20, 1977

It starts with a blast of horns, and then a blast of singing. Then the chorus is quieter than the rest, which is weird to me. I can't put my finger on why this song bores me, but it does.

Meco – “Star Wars Theme/Cantina Band” -- October 1, 1977

A disco mashup of the Star Wars theme with the cantina band theme. That happened. I love John Williams' music and I think he deserves credit for at least half of Star Wars' success. But I think this remix sounds extremely dumb. Someone slowed down the cantina band theme a couple years ago and that sounds very noir and cool. This doesn't.

Debby Boone – “You Light Up My Life” -- October 15, 1977

The person who wrote this song was completely and absolutely terrible. But Debby Boone isn't. She's a Christian singer, but seems to be one of the nice ones, not the wingnut fundie ones. Anyway, she wasn't a Christian singer in 1977 (though she was Christian). And she had a good voice. But she sings this song painfully slowly. It sounds like she comes in after where she's supposed to come in and then draws out the notes longer than she's supposed to. I don't know if that's her or the song itself. I sped up the song to 1.25 and it's a little more palatable, but it's still bad. It's a trudge. I don't feel lit up after this.

The Bee Gees – “How Deep Is Your Love” -- December 24, 1977

It's not falsetto, though Barry Gibb does go uncomfortably high some. But it's still very bad. It's a string of bland cliches over bland music. And the weird 70s male romance song entitlement: "And it's me you need to show/ How deep is your love?" Shut up.

BEST OF 1977 -- "Dreams" by Fleetwood Mac  WORST OF 1977 -- "Star Wars Theme/Cantina Band" by Meco. People really would disco to anything, huh?

#billboard number ones

[shanethvarosa]

Music Review: 2020

My blog has been a lot of things over the years, but it did originate as something I used to publicly review music; especially in the Visual Kei scene. Since I began the blog so many years ago, I had actually been hired to review Visual Kei and J-Rock music for an actual website: VKH-Press.com, work I am very, very proud of to this day. However, with not much news to comment on or work to critique, I haven’t been as active. Plus, personal issues always seem to stand in my way. However, I always take the time to discuss my passions at the end of the year. There were so many incredible releases, despite the COVID-19 pandemic, and so I wanted to take the time time to discuss my favorite releases and, maybe, the not-so-favorites as well. Quick shout out to Bastille’s Goosebumps EP and Megan Thee Stallion’s Good News LP as I did not get to listen to them before I wrote up my lists, but were still excellent releases. See my thoughts below! 

Overall, there were about 75 albums or groupings of albums I listened to this year and split them between various tiers. Starting with the bad tier, there were actually only ten albums listed here and mostly just because they were seemingly unnecessary collection albums. For example, another Satsuki collection? Rides in ReVellion releasing two greatest hits LPs after only five years of work? Beyonce releasing The Lion King: The Gift again? None of those felt like necessary releases. There weren’t many albums that really screamed bad to me this year, but I really could not stand Vanessa Carlton’s “Love is an Art” or Justin Bieber’s “Changes.” The only other albums on this tier were just underwhelming compared to what I know the artist is capable of, but the “best bad tier album,” in my view, was The 1975′s “Notes on a Conditional Form.” 

The mid-tier albums had all sorts of reasons for being only mid-tier. They weren’t quite bad or outright unnecessary, but are mostly by artists who put out work that was nowhere near the caliber of their usual work or were re-releases or other collection albums. For example, Tove Lo’s “Sunshine Kitty: Pawprint Edition” or Man With A Mission’s remixes/b-sides/covers albums. Nice to have with good quality music, but I wish we’d just have had brand new EPs or LPs. 

The good-tier albums were all really excellent releases, but didn’t hit home the way anything on the “God-Tier” list did. Here, I’d like to share a quick top ten: 

10. Taeyeon’s “Purpose: Repackage” & Japanese EP, “#GirlsSpkOut” 9. Charli XCX’s “How I’m Feeling Now” 8. Miyavi’s “Holy Nights” & “Holy Nights: 2020 Lockdown” 7. TK’s “Sainou” 6. PVRIS’s “Use Me” 5. Buck-Tick’s “Abracadabra” 4. Katy Perry’s “Smile” 3. Alicia Keys’ “Alicia” 2. Dua Lipa’s “Future Nostalgia” & “Club Future Nostalgia” 1. Ava Max’s “Heaven & Hell

Without furhter ado, though, the God Tier Top 25: 

25. Acme’s We Are Visual Kei: Essentially a collection album of several songs that were b-sides that never made a full-blown album. This LP was loaded with some of Acme’s best work and shows that they are going to be here for a long time, despite Div not quite working out. Recommended tracks: Mononoke Requiem, Gekiyama Celluloid, Houkago no Shiiku 

24. Alanis Morisette’s Such Pretty Forks in the Road: Admittedly, a huge fan in the 90′s and loved her cover of Seal’s Crazy. However, before this album I didn’t really listen to much of her body of work and I can see why today’s youth might not listen to this album. It is very “adult” insofar as it deals with her struggles in marriage, parenting, religion, etc. Her vocal performance is exceptional and her song writing remains some of the best in the business. Recommended tracks: Smiling, Nemesis, Reasons I Drink. 

23. Niall Horan’s Heartbreak Weather: Not my usual cup of tea, but for some reason Niall’s music makes me feel softer than normal. He’s very cute and charming and his words are always so romantic. It feels more genuine than the music made by other members of One Direction and kind-of reminds me of earlier Taylor Swift writing, but from a male perspective. Recommended Tracks: Put A Little Love On Me, Arms of a Stranger, Still. 

22. K/DA’s All Out: I don’t even really understand what this is, but I love it. There’s something to do with League of Legends? Cartoons? International pop stars? Whatever it is, I’m totally obsessed. These songs just completely slap. Recommended Tracks: The Baddest, More, Drum Go Dum. 

21. Darrell’s Brilliant Death: This might even “officially” be a single, but there’s enough content to market it as an album. Darrell is a band formed from the ashes of Deathgaze and Ai’s solo project. Who knows why Ai didn’t just continue after his solo album, Confusion, but he decided to go back to the band-format with confusingly-named Darrell. This album is then, incidentally, mostly Deathgaze covers. It brings the production into the new era and gives you a lot of nostalgic love for old hits. Recommended Tracks: Brilliant Death, Evoke the World, Abyss. 

20. Alice Nine’s Fuyajou Eden & Kuro to Wonderland: Neither album was particularly long, in fact these were glorified EPs that could’ve been merged to one two-sided LP, but in either case... Both albums had something really special to offer and felt like a true comeback after years of name changes and finally going back to their original, kanji-styled name. Recommended Tracks: Kakumei Kaika -Revolutionary Blooming-, Testament, Replica, Glow. 

19. Mucc’s Aku: This album felt very long in the making after a series of weird singles that didn’t feel like they were going anywhere. Ultimately, a lot of those singles did not make the album including my favorite one: Taboo. The resulting album, though, did feel very cohesive and thematic and even featured one of this year’s heavy hitters: Hazuki. Recommended Tracks: Aku -Justice-, Memai, Ameria. 

18. Miley Cyrus’s Plastic Hearts: This person is absolutely one of my favorite people in music. I’m pretty sure they have comeout as genderfluid/non-binary, so I want to stick with safe pronouns, just in case. However, they’ve always been a favorite and as they’ve come out as such a champion for the LGBT, I love them even more. The album though gave me a lot of hype for something very 80′s rock, but didn’t quite give me what I expected. All in all, the music was fantastic, just a little off-beat from expectations. Recommended Tracks: Gimme What I Want, Angels Like You, WTF Do I Know. 

17. Rina Sawayama’s Sawayama: I didn’t expect to fall in love with this girl the way I did. My boyfriend recommended “STFU” to me as kind of a joke because the song discusses a lot of Asian racism that I’m always criticizing people in my life for falling into, but then the song was so bad ass I checked out the album. There were so many different types of music on it and she really did a good job with all of them. Then, with the deluxe edition coming out and the hardcore club banger “Lucid” being involved... Just really brought it all home. Recommended Tracks: Tokyo Love Hotel, Lucid, Fuck This World. 

16. Amber Liu’s X: This was just an EP, but every song on it was great. Amber Liu was from f(x), a K-Pop Icon Group, but she always seemed like the odd one out. She was such a tomboy, so silly and funny all the time, and didn’t really behave like other Korean idols. I mean, really, she isn’t actually even Korean. I believe she’s Chinese American. In either case, the EP really noted some of her own personal strugles in the business and also remaining pretty fun at parts too. I saw her live in Philly before COVID-19 and she was truly excellent. Recommended Tracks: Numb, Stay Calm, Other People. 

15. Blackpink’s The Album: Not much of an album at only 8 tracks, but that’s K-Pop for you. I bet next year I’ll be putting “Blackpink’s The Album: Repackage” on my top 25 list. The quality of the music was pretty dope though, all things considered. It was a very solid debut effort with all of their previous songs being somewhere in the same lane as this one. I still kind of believe they are a reminder of what 2NE1 could have been, but they’re doing well enough on their own. Recommended Tracks: Ice Cream, Lovesick Girls, Pretty Savage. 

14. Hazuki’s Year Over All: Kind of a weird way to word it, but Hazuki basically released two albums this year in different formats. His work with his band, Lynch., was pretty magnificent. I’m not one to usually dwell on a Lynch. album. Their singles or featured tracks are what I usually get into, but the actual album (Ultima) really did a good job of showing how versatile Hazuki can be. His solo album, Souen -Funeral-, was an entirely stripped down, gothic orchestral album of Lynch. covers and other J-Hard Rock artists. Hearing it done like this was almost transcendental. Recommended Tracks: Xero, Idol, Ray, D.A.R.K. 

13. Sam Smith’s Love Goes: They had me scared that their album wasn’t coming this year once they pushed it back, back in May. Then again, at the time, an album called “To Die For” was probably super tone deaf. In any case, literally every single released for this album had me in love. So, when they all got included in the final version, I was thrilled. Sam gave us a bonus song after the album as well, but I can see why that one didn’t get on. In any case, this is a huge step up from “The Thrill of it All,” which I didn’t really care for. Recommended Tracks: Another One, Dance (’Til You Love Someone Else), Forgive Myself. 

12. Troye Sivan’s In A Dream: I love this kid. He’s so gay and so not shy about it and it really makes me smile. The EP comes after his last LP, Bloom, where the title track basically talks about bottoming for the first time and this new EP deals with a few other queer issues over weirdly produced beats that just... make sense. Recommended tracks: Stud, In A Dream, Easy. 

11. Matenrou Opera’s Chronos: Unfortunately, this band just lost their guitarist again. Their original, Anzi, was basically the most consummate guitarist in the visual kei scene that wasn’t Hizaki and he left them. Their sound wasn’t quite right since and they seemed to just get it back with Chronos when Jay left them. I guess we’ll see what they do next, but I think Chronos could be their last great release. Recommended Tracks: Chronos, Silence, Reminiscence. 

10. BoA’s Better: A very recent release that hasn’t had much time for me to digest. This is strange for me to put it so high on my list for that reason, but BoA is one of my all time favorites. She never disappoints me. This album was no different. It wasn’t exactly up to par with “Woman” or “Watashi Kono Mama de Ii no Kana,” but it definitely gave us some new and very iconic Queen BoA bangers. Recommended Tracks: Cut Me Off, Start Over, Temptations. 

9. Kesha’s High Road: A semi-step down from Rainbow, only because a lot of the same melodic elements and, sometimes, even beats were used on this album too. However, her vocal performance was outstanding and she even gave us a new dirty-pop song with some interesting indie-pop tracks to go with it. Plus, who doesn’t love a Big Freedia feature? Recommended Tracks: Resentment, Raising Hell, Tonight. 

8. Lady Gaga’s Chromatica: Anyone who knows me knows I don’t really love Gaga anymore. After all the drama with Madonna and her experimentation with “Joanne” I didn’t think I’d ever like her music again. However, she definitely won back big points for me on Chromatica. It was finally fun, weird, dancey, and then simultaneously emotional and I was really able to get back into it. She’s always had the voice, but on this one it also showed us that she still has what made us love her. Recommended Tracks: Rain On Me, Plastic Doll, Enigma. 

7. Koda Kumi’s My Name Is... Angel + Monster: She is, very likely, my Japanese Pop Queen. She always makes these absolutely outlandish bangers of dance tracks that have such a great attitude and beat and when she released re(CORD)... last year? 2018? Who can remember... I thought she could never outdo herself. Then she released “Lucky Star” and I was floored. I was a bit disappointed when they were only to promote a “My Name Is...” collection album, but then, to my surprise, a full set of new tracks came out just after that just blew me entirely away. Guess the last 6 albums must be pretty great, huh? Recommended tracks: Killer Monster, Work It!, Alarm. 

6. Grimes’ Miss Anthropocene: I’ve never been a big fan of Grimes, but when Violence came out I was really looking forward to whatever album this was going to end up promoting. The song is actual fire, but then the LP ended up being some kind of experimental Gothic Pop with Asian Pop influences I never expected. I doubt I’ll ever find something she does this good ever again, but it was really a musical light in the darkness of this year. Recommended tracks: Darkseid, Delete Forever, Violence. 

5. Kylie Minogue’s Disco: Admittedly, my draw to Kylie has always been that she is like some kind of Australian Madonna. Madonna being one of my all time favorite artists... In fact, number 2 for all women I listen to, Kylie has some big shoes to fill with her sometimes generic pop that she puts out. However, I haven’t really truly loved a Kylie song since “Get Outta My Way” and then this album comes out filled with tracks to love for the rest of time. Recommended Tracks: Miss A Thing, Till You Love Somebody, Magic. 

4. Chanmina’s Notebook/Angel: I don’t have really any way of knowing how popular Chanmina is in Japan or if she is as popular in the Japanese Queer Scene as she should be, but god damn does she know what she’s doing. Her music is raunchy, bitchy, and condescending at it’s highest and deeply personal at it’s most mellow. There is no “lowest.” “Notebook” was a two-sided album and “Angel” a strong follow up EP, but all the recommended tracks are from “Notebook.” If you have not listened to “Picky”.... go do it now, I’ll wait. Recommended tracks: Picky, Baby, Lucy. 

3. The Weeknd’s After Hours: Incidentally, I got into The Weeknd after someone said something shitty about him here on Tumblr! I took their likely-valid criticism and went to check him out for myself and I gotta say, I love his work. The beats are literally always on point and his voice is like silk. This album provided more than a few iconic songs and I always can’t wait to see what he does next. Recommended Tracks: Alone Again, Heartless, Blinding Lights. 

2. Halsey’s Manic: The singles and features she did between Hopeless Fountain Kingdom and Manic gave me such insanely high hopes and I was not disappointed. HFK was a strong album of course, but this was near perfection for me. I think the production of this alt-pop album was the star of the show because it wasn’t all one way, there were heavy-bass songs, interesting piano riffs, striaght up punk rock, all of it. She really made an album quite like it’s namesake. Recommended Tracks: Ashley, Killing Boys, Still Learning. 

1. Dexcore’s Metempsychosis: A newcomer to the visual kei and death metal scene, they’ve been putting out single after single for years in preparation for their extemeley long and multidaceted debut album. With a total of about 33 songs, the entire second disc was rerecorded singles from their early days and some even got new lyrical treatment. The main series of songs were, of course, also totally flooring and all of the recommended tracks are the new ones. If you haven’t checked them out by now, you have to! Recommended tracks: Cibus, Scribble, Period.

#personal #music #2020 #visual kei #k-pop #dexcore #halsey #the weeknd #chanmina #kylie minogue #grimes #koda kumi #lady gaga #kesha #BoA

[dopebasementfart]

Late for the Sky - Greatest Work About the 60′s

Late for the Sky by Jackson Browne is the most profound album about the 1960s ever produced. 

Leading up to Late for the Sky's release in 1974, Browne was most notable for his pop-driven songs that frequented radio charts and mature songwriting. His self-titled debut album included Doctor My Eyes, a track that discusses spiritual search disguised as a pop record. His second album, For Everyman, featured These Days - a piece Browne wrote when he was 16 that dives into the regret and defeat associated with time. 

The wisdom Browne displayed in his first two records became magnified with Late for the Sky. The album opens with the title track - a song about realizing that a relationship no longer works. Browne sings: 

"Looking hard into your eyes 

there was nobody I'd ever known 

such an empty surprise 

to feel so alone." 

As he progresses through his emotions, Browne questions the relationship, himself, and finally moves towards acceptance that the relationship is over when he says:

"Awake again I can't pretend

I know I'm alone and close to the end

Of the feeling we've known"

This song powerfully recounts the end of a relationship from the deterioration to its end. Browne further explores that deterioration in the next track, Fountain of Sorrow.  

The song begins with Browne focusing on a photograph of a former lover he finds inside a drawer. This moment takes him back to the height of the relationship, but he moves into the breakdown of the love that they once felt. Browne writes:

"When you see through love's illusions, there lies the danger

And your perfect lover just looks like a perfect fool

So you go running off in search of a perfect stranger

While the loneliness seems to spring from your life

Like a fountain from a pool"

​This song perfectly describes the ending of a relationship as one looks back on it. In Farther On, Browne discusses the longing and struggle to find what he thinks love is. This song fits into the theme of heartbreak that Browne has established, but Late for the Sky and Fountain of Sorrow overshadow it with maturity. The theme of the record is heartbreak. That much is obvious. The real question that we must ask is: "what caused this heartbreak?" As we work through the record, one might assume that Browne must have experienced a terrible breakup and reflected on his personal experiences. However, Browne's first child was born in 1973 with his then-girlfriend Phyllis Major,  and they would eventually marry in late 1975.  This record is about the heartbreak that inevitably followed the end of the 1960s. 

Specifically, the heartbreak derives from Browne's reflection upon the 1960s. Late for the Sky and The Late Show form the thesis for the entire record. The Late Show discusses isolation, the superficial nature of society, and moving on. At the end of the track, the listener hears car doors slamming as Browne sings:

"Look

It's like you're standing in the window

Of a house nobody lives in

And I'm sitting in a car across the way (Let's just say)

It's an early model chevrolet (Let's just say)

It's a warm and windy day

You go and pack your sorrow

The trash man comes tomorrow

Leave it at the curb and we'll just roll away"

While Browne entered the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 2004, Bruce Springsteen referenced Late for the Sky as Browne's "masterpiece." He refers to the slamming of the car doors in The Late Show, representing the movement away from the 1960s. Springsteen also said, "there is no better record to capture the slow after-burn of the 1960s." 

The Road and the Sky is an upbeat rock track that livens up the mood of the entire record. I am honestly surprised they didn't release this as one of the singles. Although it fits in thematically, it does not fit into the perspective of this record. It's too much of a shift to go from The Late Show, The Road and the Sky, and then into For a Dancer. The theme fits - it's a song about moving on and not looking back - but it is not reflective like the first four tracks of the record. 

The last three tracks on the album close the record beautifully. For a Dancer discusses the loneliness of death and the lost potential that comes with dying young. This track takes on such a unique perspective about death that it looks at life with the thought of loneliness from dying in mind.  

Walking Slow represents the optimism associated with moving on, and Before the Deluge reflects on the generation that built the 1970s. Browne indicates this thought when he says: 

"Some of them were dreamers

And some of them were fools

Who were making plans and thinking of the future 

with the energy of the innocent"

Looking ahead with optimism combined with an homage to the generation of the previous decade is a perfect way to conclude this album. Browne's reflection on the 1960s roots itself in heartbreak, but provides a beautiful outlook moving into the coming decades. 

Late for the Sky is genuinely Browne's masterpiece, and the most remarkable record about the 1960s ever released.

#jackson browne #lateforthesky #1960 #1974 #the60s

[deacysfatbottomedgirl]

Disclaimer: This post is based merely on my observation of the relationship between Freddie Mercury and John Deacon as viewed from an outsider's perspective gleaned through interviews and photos. I don't claim to be an expert in this matter in any way, shape or form. It's also based on my own personal experiences gained by going through this thing called "life". Let's get to it.

John and Freddie were extremely close: That's something every true Queen fan can agree on. True, John was also close to Roger; but his relationship with Freddie ran much deeper. His relationship with Brian was contentious at times, arm's length respect at its best.

Freddie's passing affected all the remaining band members differently, just as grieving is an individual, deeply personal process. We all know John couldn't continue performing with Queen after Freddie died, but the dynamic of their relationship when Freddie was alive is something truly special.

John alluded to the fact that Freddie, "brings out the best in me (him)". It's a fact that his shyness was softened by Freddie's flamboyance and John appreciated that. Losing his Father at the tender age of 11 affected John in many ways. He looked up to Freddie as a big brother, almost a surrogate father figure. John was able to become a part of one of the most influential bands in history because Freddie protected him from the pitfalls of fame as much as he allowed him to. Even though he married Veronica and had a large family, there are certain things you can't or are unable to share with your partner. Veronica wasn't a rock star, Freddie was. Veronica didn't go on tour with the band or experience the stress of having to record an album and couldn't know what the pressure was actually like: Freddie did. A soul mate is extremely rare to find in life and in my opinion, John found two: A partner in Veronica and a best friend in Freddie.

I've studied the group dynamic within the band for a very long time. Without telling everyone how old I am, (LOL) suffice to say, I was around to remember and appreciate Queen's early success and release of "A Night at the Opera" in 1975. John Deacon was my first celebrity crush so many years ago, and still is today!

I had the honor of finding a "soul mate" in the form of a best friend, who died suddenly at a young age. I KNOW what that pain feels like. I miss my best friend EVERY DAY.

I haven't found one in a romantic partner, but I'm not dead yet. 😉 I read somewhere that John and Veronica would frequent a Pub near their home about three times a week for several years. Veronica informed the Bartender who John was and instructed him to NEVER mention Queen in their presence. John also told Roger and Brian at their last concert appearance in 1997 that he "couldn't do this anymore". Roger indicated that John appeared to be extremely nervous and uncomfortable at that event because he was "chain-smoking, pacing and was generally miserable" the entire time. Photos of the band at that concert show John's body language as closed and distant.

I also find it interesting that there are no photos of John smoking prior to the mid-80s, around the time Freddie would have told his bandmates he was HIV positive. People who start smoking, using drugs or drinking heavily in their 30s, usually experience a life altering stressful event that leads them to adopt those habits.

John isn't fragile or weak: He's experienced the loss of two dominant and very important male "guardians" in his life. Both losses have profoundly affected him in ways only he can understand. I pray he finds peace and know this long-time Queen fan would like nothing more than to see him smile and be happy once again when remembering the large part of his life he believes died with Freddie.

Much love to you, John Deacon. (From one of many fans who love you)

#john deacon #john deacon groupies #john deacon fanfic #brian may #roger taylor #rockstar freddy #freddie mercury #freaky deaky #deacury #queen fandom #queen band #queen #borhap #bohemian rhapsody #farrokh bulsara

[parrishh]

Dig a little deeper

tagged by @gcralts​ thank u libby ily

i’m putting this under the cut because it’s long!

1. do you prefer writing with a black pen or a blue pen? blue!

2. would you prefer to live in the country or in the city? oh i’m definitely a city gal (to be totally honest, i’m actually a suburban homebody, but i couldn’t live in the country)

3. if you could learn a new skill, what would it be? i have owned a guitar for...five years? and have never learned how to play it so that would be good

4. do you drink your tea/coffee with sugar? tea sometimes, coffee always

5. what was your favorite book as a child? oh gosh i had so many...ella enchanted by gail carson levine (still my favorite book), the children of noisy village by astrid lindgren (but in polish, the english version is missing too much of the story), & stargirl by jerry spinelli come to mind first

6. do you prefer baths or showers? showers, definitely

7. if you could be a mythical creature, which one would you be? i just want to be a witch/wizard, that’s all

8. paper or electronic books? oh, god, paper, no question

9. what is your favorite item of clothing? i have this oversized forest green sweatshirt from the park my family goes camping in every year and it’s my favorite thing ever

10. do you like your name? would you like to change it? i...really don’t love it, but i don’t think i would change it at this point in my life

11. who is a mentor to you? i mean, to take this question very literally, since i was a new teacher this past year i was assigned a mentor teacher at the school i work at and she’s so wonderful! i text her with so many questions all of the time and she never loses patience with me

12. would you like to be famous? if so, what for? it’s my dream to publish a book one day and of course i’d want it to do well, so, yes, i’d like to be famous for that

13. are you a restless sleeper? i mean, kind of? i’m a light sleeper but i don’t think i move around that much in my sleep

14. do you consider yourself to be a romantic person? very much so, yes

15. which element best represents you? earth earth earth

16. who do you want to be closer to? this is probably not what this question is asking for but i wish my good friends on here lived closer to me (or at least on the same continent) so i could see them irl

17. do you miss someone at the moment? of course! covid has kept me away from so many of my loved ones

18. tell us about an early childhood memory. i remember standing in my grandparents’ living room back in poland when i was probably around two. my grandma gave me a bag of clothespins and i was throwing them out the window for my grandpa to catch and i thought it was so fun! they’ve both passed since then so it’s a memory i cherish

19. what is the strangest thing you have eaten? i ate an entire post-it note once? just because someone told me i wouldn’t

20. what are you most thankful for? i was in a dark place in my life for...a long time, so i’m incredibly grateful for the wonderful people i have in my life now who help keep me away from that place

21. do you like spicy food? yes but my tolerance isn’t as high as i’d like to think it is

22. have you ever met someone famous? literally the most random people. wesley stromberg from emblem3, kaylin white from kaylin and miles, & alli simpson (???) come to mind. also, one time, at a concert in, like, 2013, i met a bunch of youtube beauty gurus i used to watch back then. i don’t even remember who they all were, but one of them was claudia sulewski and i still adore her. i’ve met the members of my favorite band (the maine) multiple times, as well as cameron leahy from the downtown fiction (that was many, many years ago) and the members of the griswolds. ooh, and i met the 1975 at an album signing! 

23. do you keep a diary or journal? i used to! i had one of those “one line a day” journals and i wrote in it every day for five years, but i finished it last year and since then i haven’t journaled at all

24. do you prefer to use pen or pencil? pen

25. what is your star sign? taurus

26. do you like your cereal crunchy or soggy? um, soggy cereal can stay far away from me

27. what would you want your legacy to be? i just want to inspire my students and my future children, if i have any, to make the world a more equitable place

28. do you like reading? what was the last book you read? do i ever! i just finished crooked kingdom by leigh bardugo

29. how do you show someone you love them? if i love someone, i want to share pieces of my life with them, so i’ll reach out about things i’ve read or watched or thought about with them on a regular basis! also, when it comes to being in person, i’m very touchy-feely with people i love

30. do you like ice in your drinks? sure, but it’s not a must for me

31. what are you afraid of? something happening to my younger brother (i have nightmares about it all the time, for no good reason), never finding someone i want to spend my life with, finding out that people i care about are only pretending to like me

32. what is your favorite scent? everyone always comes for me for this but warm milk

33. do you address older people by their name or surname? surname, i guess, but i just try to avoid addressing them by name if i’m unsure lol

34. if money was not a factor, how would you live your life? jeez, i don’t know...i’d travel! a lot!

35. do you prefer swimming in pools or the ocean? pools! now if you asked me pools vs. lakes, that would be a different story

36. what would you do if you found $50 in the ground? i’d probably just keep it but it depends on the likelihood of determining where it came from

37. have you ever seen a shooting star? did you make a wish? yes and probably

38. what is one thing you would want to teach your children? how not to be an asshole

39. if you had to have a tattoo, what would it be and where would you get it? i already have two! i do want more, though! the next one i have planned is something related to my favorite band (the maine), and i want it on my ribs

40. what can you hear now? air conditioning, and someone rummaging through a bag in the kitchen

41. where do you feel the safest? i’m not sure, but the first thought that came into my head was in the backseat of the car, at night, while my dad is driving

42. what is one thing you want to overcome/conquer? i’ve been telling myself that i should go see a therapist for the past, i don’t know, ten years, so i want to actually overcome my fear of taking that leap and just go

43. if you could travel back to any era, what would it be? i’m as content as i can be in this era, things used to be even more messed up than they are now. if i had to time travel, i suppose i’d like to experience being a young adult in the 70′s or 80′s (the music scene UGH)

44. what is your most used emoji? 😊 or 🙃 or 🥺

45. describe yourself using one word. persevering

46. what do you regret the most? something i’m not ready to share

47. last movie you saw? the hate u give! 

48. last tv show you watched? love, victor!!!!! it was so good!!!!!!

49. invent a word and its meaning i’m lame but i literally can’t think of anything

tagging: @hathawaywrites @gcndalf @remusjlvpins @phantomness @louvegoods @kazbrekkerrs (only if you want to, no pressure!)

#this one got pretty deep #it was fun #tag games #w says things