#also y’all are not prepared for that level of financial security and i would bet my LIFE on that

[sarcastic-clapping]

instead of a weird Premium Tumblr subscription model that is literally useless due to alternatives like Patreon and Only Fans that Tumblr stands absolutely no chance of realistically competing with how about you let me tip on posts??? like literally if y’all have to both monetize this site AND rip off another platform can you just steal the fucking Twitch Model™️??? let me donate based on my enjoyment of the content i could consume for free and then take your stupid finder’s fee you dumb little website

like “ah this post made me laugh. here is a dollar op. thank you for the serotonin”

“these gifs are really good and they must have taken a long time and also i got paid today so here is $5”

“so true, beloved mutual. here is $3. just because. why not”

“this person’s hot take is so terrible that i want to reply ‘here’s my two cents, shut the fuck up’ and literally donate two cents before i block them just to be petty. and i don’t even care if tumblr takes one of those two cents. in fact, in many ways that is even funnier”

✨ lean into the chaos of this platform and the impulsivity of your userbase you absolute buffoons. i am begging you ✨

#tumblr #posts+ #post+ #tumblr update #staff #i would accidentally spent upwards of $10 on this website a month if you let me spend money impulsively for added comedic effect #because i have adhd absolutely NO impulse control and disposable income that i spend irresponsibly to feel joy #THAT is your userbase #as a marketer i am PLEADING with you to capitalize on our weakness more effectively if you’re going to have the audacity to monetize #also y’all are not prepared for that level of financial security and i would bet my LIFE on that #+post