"I was always hungry for love. Just once, I wanted to know what it was like to get my fill of it — to be fed so much love I couldn't take any more. Just once."
- Haruki Murakami
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“I had two longings and one was fighting the other. I wanted to be loved and I wanted to be always alone.”
~ Jean Rhys
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I don't think people understand what it means to be lonely and misunderstood for an entire life.
When I was a lonely child I was always thinking to myself "It will be okay, I will have friends when I'm a teenager."
When I was a lonely teenager I always thought to myself "its okay, I will have friends and a relationship when I'm an adult."
But now that I'm an adult I realize, its much more likely that it will stay that way forever. I will never belong anywhere.
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i feel more alone being with a group of people than i do actually being alone
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I love life but I’m never going to find a way to live it without an abiding fear that I’m going to be alone forever.
As they say, there’s no guarantee you’ll be loved.
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God, I hate this so much. I want to be a good friend, I really do, but I just fuck it up again anyway. What’s the point anymore? I’m just meant to be alone; that way I can’t hurt anyone else.
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