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mylittleredgirl · 12 days
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m*a*s*h set in present day: frank seduces margaret by gifting her flag-themed lingerie ($2.99 clearance at walmart) in a high-end designer shopping bag. she can't contain herself and drops hints all day about how ✨someone✨ is treating her like a queen and wouldn’t-you-like-to-know what he got me and from WHERE here's a hint it's on FIFTH AVENUE. it goes south when frank does something to inspire swamp rat revenge, so they stir up trouble by leaving evidence around that the original contents of the bag were for you-know-who instead. the last straw and last joke of the b-plot as she kicks him out of her tent is that "THESE ARE MADE! IN! CHINA!!!!"
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cctinsleybaxter · 1 month
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paused it just so i could zoom in on the tv listings my god 2011 was a dark time
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nade2308 · 11 months
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"You think I'm ever gonna turn the ignition of my car again without sweating?"
@thethistlegirl @malewifebillcage
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july-19th-club · 1 year
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i hope the potential supernatural element of yellowjackets never becomes clear. i hope that for the entire duration of the show it is this pervasive background element, maybe - is this why we can't ever seem to get out of here? is this why all of our plans and projects and innovations fail? is this why our luck is so bad, why we keep running short on food? is this why it has followed us into our lives forever? - or are we just a bunch of people lost in the woods slowly going loopier from hunger and isolation and depression and despair. i hope it's never made explicit i hope neither the characters nor the audience can ever be sure if any of that supernatural stuff ever was real. no visions no spirits no curses just us. i think if they made it real it would genuinely ruin the show for me
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dejwrld · 6 months
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feel like i am the only person who isn’t shocked at these celebs (especially american ones) posting in support of israel. like i feel like covid was the shift for me when it comes to celeb culture. that lil video of them singing that song gave me ptsd
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lapassionbeatrice · 7 months
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oppenheimer was better than i expected :) i cried and felt like walking out a few times but i stayed in and it's the first movie in a while that i watch in cinemas that was actually coherent and emotional for me (not a huge indicator bc my local cinema sucks ass but still)
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ethanhuntfemmefatale · 7 months
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Okay, TC moving ranking update when
arc you know your wish is my command
disclaimer 1: the below ranking is not at all based on movie quality. It's based on aspects like "personal enjoyment," "personal investment," "TC hotness levels," etc. proceed at your own risk
disclaimer 2: the below ranking is very, very long. proceed at your own risk
bottom to top, babey!
21. Eyes Wide Shut
This movie’s one of the ones I definitely expected to like way more than I did. I’d never seen a Kubrick film before and I think I didn’t get the points it was trying to make—I kept getting torn out of the story by the way the camera treated women and female bodies. And the very slow-moving style of the movie, with lines delivered slowly, long still shots, etc., really didn’t work for me. I also just couldn’t help but feel like the movie’s general relationship with sex and sexuality was coming from a very specific perspective that I just don’t share or understand. TC is good in this, it’s not my favorite of his roles but his acting was by far my favorite part of the movie so naturally they put him in a mask and made him stand completely still. Favorite bits of the movie were 1) that shot in the beginning where he curls up on the couch in jeans and Ugg boots (amanda marisatomay gets it) and 2) the scene in the bedroom where he’s in his boxers and he looks really cute. To specify i didn’t like these scenes for plot reasons or character reasons I just liked seeing him look comfy. I do think that in terms of the movie’s discussions on sex and sexuality TC’s character probably has the most interesting and complicated relationship with sex and I think somebody with tastes in media more suited to a movie like this would probably be able to find some pretty interesting ideas. I had a hard time with this movie, but I can understand why somebody else might love it.
20. Jack Reacher
I have to be perfectly honest here. I didn’t finish this movie. I got up to the part where the young woman, I forget her name, is about to die, and I decided i didn’t want to watch anymore. So there is a chance that this movie gets really good after like the hour mark and I just don’t know that. The opening sequence of this film is fucking dynamite. I just really deeply hated this movie’s politics and I was willing to be patient with it for a while cause I wanted to see if there was anything redeeming in it, but my frustration won out. The movie in general spends a lot of time dealing with issues of criminality and the justice system, and imo it does it really clumsily. It also has a really weird treatment of women and female characters. TC’s performance of Jack Reacher is the only thing i liked about the character—I thought he did some really cool stuff with a lack of expressiveness, making the character really reserved, it went a long way towards likeability in a movie where the writing made him very unlikeable. The movie had a very action-hero-movie focus on making its protagonist badass and invulnerable, which was annoying to me and something that I’ve been spoiled in TC movies to not expect. To me even though I honestly didn’t like it much at all and couldn’t finish it I rank it above EWS because it’s entertaining, it’s a basically fun movie that’s well made, well acted, moves along at a nice clip and makes basic sense.
19. Oblivion
I had a strong emotional reaction to this movie when i watched it, anybody who was following me at that time probably remembers. This is another case of a quality film, well made, well acted, very entertaining, but it pissed me off. I felt like there was a ton of wasted potential in the concept, and in fact for the first third or so of the movie I was very invested and excited. To me Tom Cruise is not the emotional heart of the movie, that belongs to Vika, played by Andrea Riseborough, who has a deeply fucked up and compelling dynamic with TC’s Jack. Unfortunately (spoilers) the movie kills her, and that’s really the beginning of the end of my enjoyment of it. Meanwhile, TC’s other co-star Olga Kurylenko (Julia) is acting her heart out, but the script really gives her nothing to do. This film could have been a top pick for me, but it’s so thematically inconsistent and completely average in places it becomes almost unwatchable.
18. The Firm
The main sin of this movie to me is that I don’t have much to say about it. I think it didn’t totally mesh with me personally for some reason. Some just excellent acting all around, another kinda sucky TC guile hero protagonist which I always love, a conspiracy and emotional manipulation and plotting and suspense—but it just didn’t really do it for me. There were moments I loved. Some interesting compelling emotional beats. I could see why someone would really adore this movie. But it left me a bit cold.
17. Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol
I’ve talked before about my complex feelings on this movie and why I rank it lowest of the Mission Impossibles. This movie like all the MIs is very close to my heart. Ghost protocol ethan is one of my favorite ethans—his hair is my favorite of the ethan haircuts, which if you are an MI fan you know is significant. I love so much about this movie. It has some cool interesting twists on the classic action formula, I think it’s a significant point in Ethan’s arc, I think it’s a fun entertaining film. That being said ethan doesn’t feel like the heart of this movie in the way he normally does, and as much as I enjoy the team members I don’t feel that anyone steps up to take his place. The movie ends up feeling empty to me because of that, outside of the jailbreak opening where I feel ethan’s story and his character strongly. Anyway I do love this film, I just think this film and I have different priorities. And that’s why it’s not ranked very high
16. Top Gun
In retrospect I probably shouldn’t have had high hopes going into Top Gun but because of the fame of the movie I kinda did. I didn’t like the way the plane sequences were filmed in this movie—don’t get me wrong I’m sure that stuff was very difficult to capture well, but I always felt either too close to or completely disconnected from the action, and it was hard to tell what was going on. I expected to enjoy Val Kilmer as Iceman more than I did, I overall didn’t feel like the script gave him much to work with, although there were a couple excellent emotional beats and overall his acting is superb. The heart and soul of the movie was of course Goose, who completely outshone TC as mav in my opinion, which made his death hit really hard and mav’s grief feel very earned. Another main weak point of the movie was Charlie for me, I didn’t like her, I didn’t trust her, I didn’t connect with her. Overall I can see why the film is a classic, I enjoyed it but I didn’t love it
15. Mission Impossible 3
This movie is deeply special to me…it’s very frustrating in a lot of ways. Ethan’s relationship with violence here is almost entirely incoherent. This movie’s take on the IMF is deeply frustrating. That being said every moment between Ethan and Julia is lodged so deeply in my heart…and I’m obsessed with the way this movie kills its protagonist for 5 minutes and for those five minutes Julia is the star of the movie. I think action movies should do this more often. Julia and Ethan are what makes this movie for me, also Benji and Luther are fantastic here, specifically thinking of Benji’s scene at the end on the phone with Ethan, not the anti-God bullshit. Good movie, important moment in Ethan’s arc, feels like it inherently misunderstands MI in some ways and particularly Ethan. But good movie.
14. Jack Reacher Never Go Back
I think this movie is generally seen as worse than the first which I don’t understand. I actually really enjoyed it. I absolutely adored Danika Yarosh as Samantha, and her relationship with TC’s Reacher was far and away the heart of the movie. I’ve seen the “grizzled emotionally stunted action hero accidentally adopts a kid” thing a lot, and sometimes it works for me but sometimes it doesn’t. This time it really worked. Their relationship felt believable, complicated, earned. I loved every second they were on screen together. His other co-star of the movie was good (I think of her as Maria Hill always from my Marvel days) and had some solid moments, but IMO was overshadowed. Mostly I appreciated that this movie was thematically coherent and interesting, there was a solid arc, and TC’s acting was fantastic, taking the expressionlessness of the first film and holding onto that while using his microexpressions to their fullest potential. Really excellent work from him in this film.
13. Mission Impossible 2
I love this movie. I think it’s fun, I think it’s campy, I think it’s boring in places and deeply entertaining in others. I think it’s a well done action film that brings new and interesting ideas to MI and was crucial in MI becoming the franchise it is today. TC is standout in it, Thandie Newton is incredible in it. I like what it does for Ethan as a character, it pushes him down the action hero path while keeping this inherent understanding of his weirdness, his intensity, his almost dorky charm. I think there’s a lot of vulnerability for both Ethan and Nyah in this movie, and I really like that the very classic action movie style doesn’t take that away. It’s by no means a perfect film, and I understand a lot of the criticism of it (and have plenty of my own), but personally I think it’s a really important and fun part of the MI franchise and the TC filmography.
12. Interview with the Vampire
I really enjoyed…certain aspects of this movie. Tom Cruise as Lestat is an absolute unmitigated delight. My favorite TC roles in general (this is one of them, we’re going to start to get into them at this point) are usually his campiest, specifically because he brings a realness to them that makes them way more compelling even than pure camp, without sacrificing the campiness at all. His Lestat is a great example of that. It never feels as if TC is putting distance between himself and the role—Lestat is ridiculous and funny, but TC is always right there with him, never laughing at him if that makes sense. And there’s an emotional vulnerability and petty mundanity to Lestat that I just love. Antonio Banderas is also standout in this movie, as well as Kristen Dunst, both of whom commit 100% and have fantastic charisma on screen, while taking a kind of darker and more serious approach to the roles than TC’s Lestat. Brad Pitt is—brad what are you doing here. It’s so obvious he is not enjoying himself in this film. Go back to fight club my dude. The parts of the movie where we were following him only for long periods of time were honestly quite boring to me. Another issue I had with this movie was the way all the slavery elements were handled. Just very clumsy and racist handling of that stuff. 
11. Knight and Day
I really really enjoyed this movie both times I watched it. It’s so fun, it’s so campy, it’s clever and interesting and compelling. TC is just magnificent as Roy Miller, and his chemistry with Cameron Diaz is fabulous—she’s also excellent in this movie, all of the meat of June’s character comes from her fantastic acting. Paul Dano is also standout as Simon Feck. Those core three characters are very well done, although I have some frustration with the way the movie consistently cuts June off from a substantial character arc and agency. There are hints of substance in her plotline that never fully materialize and mostly get pushed aside in favor of focus on her dynamic with Roy, which is admittedly dynamite. Anyway really good film, not perfect but would highly recommend
10. American Made
Anybody looking at my posts this morning already knows probably most of my feelings on this movie. This movie really sucked me in, I really loved it, it felt immersive and interesting and nuanced and heartfelt. It completely devastated me at the end. Barry Seal is another one of my favorite TC roles, there’s again a (more subtle) camp that’s portrayed very genuinely and feels human and real. He’s so deeply endearing in this role. I love his hair. I love his style. I think TC should wear that style of clothing more often if he so desires cause god he looks great in this movie. Barry’s dynamic with his wife Lucy, played by Sarah Wright, was the unexpected heart of the movie. This film also features one of the only times I have ever felt catharsis from a character’s self-sacrifice, mostly because this is one of the only times I’ve ever seen that plotline with a character who I genuinely believe would do pretty much anything to survive (I see it alllll the time with characters who already have a death wish). My main issue with this film is that…I don’t know what I’m talking about, to preface. But the portrayal of South America felt stereotyped to me. It didn’t sit right. I would be interested in the perspective of someone who knows more.
9. Jerry Maguire
I watched this movie on an airplane when I was younger and I didn’t connect with it. Then I watched it again and I got bored and I stopped. Then I started Again, 30 minutes in, and watched the rest of it and absolutely loved it. I think my placing of this even in the upper middle is probably controversial, since from what I’ve heard this movie is broadly considered to be TC’s best role. Personally I disagree. I think he’s very good in this, but it isn’t one of my favorite TC roles, and not just because he has short hair in it lol. I think his particular brand of earnest comedy works great in this film. I think TC does manic energy better than any actor I’ve ever seen, and his natural emotional vulnerability works really well too. I can see why people really adore this film. I really loved this film. I guess to me the ultimate message and sentiment of the movie feels…this is a personal taste thing, but I guess the bottom line is this movie isn’t subversive enough for me LOL. The message being “having a life and a family that you love is more important than being wildly successful” is a great message! It just isn’t something I totally connect with, it doesn’t feel like an end goal that satisfies all the (to me more interesting) emotional pain and dysregulation beforehand. I am an angsty bitch though, and very queer, so that’s probably influencing my perspective on this movie. It’s a very well done film, the thematic arc is well built and coherent and interesting, the emotional beats land, I teared up at the end, I loved all the characters and felt like they were all treated well by the movie and given interesting, great journeys. Very good film, I can see why it’s so beloved, it’s very good but not special to me in the same way as some others.
8. Edge of Tomorrow
Ugh I adore this movie. I watched it, wrote a fic the same day, thought about it for a few months, watched it again, and immediately started on a second fic (which I might not finish, but still—the sheer fic-generating power of this movie…) I love this movie for many reasons, one of them is Rita Vrataski, who is so fucking excellent, Emily Blunt does a masterful job. Another one is Bill Cage, who is another favorite TC role even though he breaks the “favorite role” mold a bit, simply because he is Also kind of ridiculous and campy in a way that underlies all of his action-hero-ness and makes him constantly so much more interesting than he should by all rights be allowed to be. His arc is incredibly excellent because it doesn’t allow him to grow a moral backbone, it just forces him into the hero mold without one, which makes for a much more fascinating movie-watching experience. TC is so good at (this is a repetition, but it deserves repetition) playing characters who are kind of not great people, or kind of ridiculous, without ever putting distance between his acting and the lived experience of the character—he’s never poking fun at his own role, he lets us laugh at him. Anyway I really love this movie, I think it’s a gem of a film and a credit to the action genre.
7. Top Gun: Maverick
Another really excellent older TC film. To be perfectly honest despite my deep and enduring love of young TC my tastes generally tend to TC’s later work, with a few notable exceptions. I love this movie, it’s sweet and honest and earnest, and TC’s Mav is endlessly endearing. It’s the kind of movie that I would really like to see one day if/when I grow much older, because I think it has such meaningful emotion behind it about age and legacy. To me a weak point of this movie was that I didn’t totally connect with the young pilots, and I didn’t connect with Jennifer Connelly’s Penny. I think that was a personal thing, I know a lot of other people really loved those characters, but I didn’t connect. For me, I was watching the movie entirely for Mav, and in one scene for Ice, and I still really loved it. So that says something about the film, I think. This is also a slightly difficult film for me because I know at least one kid who decided he wanted to be a fighter pilot because of this movie, and I have complicated feelings about that. Also this is off topic and i hate to even write this down but for some reason mav looks like my ex boyfriend’s dad in a way that is VERY off putting. Still, a very good movie.
6. Fallout
This is one of my favorite MIs, and MI in general is precious to me so you’re going to see a lot of them in the upper echelons of my ranking. I love so much about this movie, I don’t feel like I need to talk much about it here cause I’ve gotten into the intricacies of my feelings about it before. Fallout Ethan is probably my favorite Ethan, I love the place he arrives at in his arc in this movie, I love what this movie does to him and for him. I adore TC’s acting in this film it’s remarkable. The end of this movie is my favorite ending of the MI films, maybe one of my favorite film endings ever. I love all the characters in this movie and I love how much care they’re given by the script, by the actors, by the film. Just excellent. I don’t like Walker, I don’t personally find him hot or interesting, maybe if I did this would be ranked higher.
5. Rogue Nation
RN is just a really fucking excellent movie. Another MI, because I love them. I love Ilsa so dearly, I love Benji and Ethan’s arc in this movie. Again, I’ve talked about this movie more in depth elsewhere, so I’ll keep it brief here. I just think this movie is great cinema, it’s deeply compelling and entertaining, it’s well written, it’s well acted, it has some really interesting elements, it has the opera sequence which is just one of the most excellently constructed sequences I’ve ever seen in a movie featuring music that I adore. Anyway I love this movie
4. Dead Reckoning, Part 1
I saw this movie in theaters—it’s the only one of all these movies that I saw in theaters. That necessarily influences the ranking. I think this movie is just masterful. It’s so cinematic, it’s so thoughtful, it’s so well acted, it’s so well made. It drives Ethan’s arc in a compelling direction that feels significant and new despite also being something that’s been building for six prior films. I love the new characters it introduces, I love the thoughtful and careful treatment of the returning characters. I love Ethan’s sexy lawyer fit. This is just a really excellent movie that I feel like is a masterclass in Pure Cinema.
3. Rock of Ages
On the one hand I’m aware this is my most controversial ranking. On the other hand I don’t actually think anyone who knows me and my tastes is surprised by this. Stacee Jaxx is far and away my favorite TC role I’ve seen so far. I just can’t say enough great things about TC’s acting in this movie, it’s literally spellbinding. Not only the thorough commitment to camp, but the commitment to something way deeper than camp, to bringing out depth and genuine emotion through camp, and on top of all of that to stand on stage and perform a full song (training his voice to do so!) with all the panache and physicality and weird professional joy and manic eyes of a rock star, it boggles the mind. This movie is absolutely terrible in my opinion. But it’s just weird enough that it gives this backing of deep subversiveness to TC’s performance and to the ideas behind his Stacee. There are so many haunting moments in this movie and so many moments that made me laugh hysterically while also feeling deeply impacted. The ideas TC is conveying are weird, and dramatic, and not simple at all, and he manages to convey them honestly, dramatically, and with so much nuance, and so much fucking gravitas, and he does all of that without sacrificing comedy—in fact he elevates it, he heightens it. I think his work in this movie is absolutely masterful. I also love his romantic interest in this movie, Constance, played by Malin Akerman, who is a delight. Her scenes with TC are so dynamic and interesting and fun. Also I just love everything about TC’s look in this movie, from the particular build (which feels interesting to me, it’s a very specific build, muscled but not washboard, and solid but showy instead of tank-y, I know this is something he thinks about so I’d be interested in how he prepared physically for the role) to the hair to the tattoos to the leather pants to the trailing hankies, it’s all striking and fun while feeling somehow honest. Despite objectively being a caricature, and having all the flamboyance and drama of a caricature, TC’s Stacee never actually feels like one. He feels like someone who’s trying to become one, and I know several people like that, and he just…nails it.
2. Risky Business
Unlike Rock of Ages, this is an absolutely incredible movie. It’s weird, it’s complex, it’s sad, it’s funny, it’s sweet, it’s really fucking good. TC’s acting here is just fabulous, this is another favorite TC role for completely different reasons—Joel can’t be described as camp, although he is a bit ridiculous, but TC brings so much vulnerability to the role that it feels painful to watch in a very good way. This is an unusually special movie. All the acting is fabulous, TC is standout.
1. Mission: Impossible
What can I say about this movie that hasn’t already been said by my 10 times watching it and my countless textposts and rambling essays? This is my favorite movie of all time. MI1 Ethan and his arc in this movie is fascinating, unusual, grounded, arresting. He’s an unusual action hero, this is an unusual action movie, it’s creepy and compelling. The Jim/Ethan/Claire trio has captured my mind ever since I saw it—as well as the Ethan/Max interactions—Luther is also fucking standout in this movie he’s everything. I just adore this film, it’s incredibly close to my heart, I can’t watch it without losing my mind about 30 times and ranting about the same scenes on tumblr for the fifth time. Anyway. MI1, number one, least surprising ranking to anyone who knows me or follows me.
This has been the Tom Cruise Ranking So Far! I’ve got somewhere in the realm of…fifteen? Twenty? of his films left to watch. I started on Legend today and I think it’s going to land on the bottom. Overall I’ve learned so much about storytelling and performance and character from TC, every movie feels like a masterclass, especially the later films. Anyway I love thoughts and reactions, please feel free to disagree loudly. Thank you for attending my TC Ted Talk
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rose-lily-hale · 4 months
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not to be a country folk on main but.... when in doubt slap some raw potato on it!
i have and abscess on my stomach an very time my shorts move its hell. i've tried antibiotic ointment and drawing salve and acetaminophen and NOTHING
my bff was like oh just put some potato on in it!
and i'm like 🤔why didn't i think of that??? (but i'm so wrapped up in school work now i forgot the very existence and cold and hot compresses 👀)
anyway grated a potato up and as soon as the juices touched my skin it was sweet relief
(also helps on cuts and scrapes) :)
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listenupcupcakes · 6 days
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Soldier, I trust you a lot to not tell anyone else this but I'm proud to come out and say that... I'm Canadian. Do you watch Trailer Park Boys?
Dear god!
DON'T WORRY PRIVATE! I WILL NOT TELL A SOUL. WHAT'S IMPORTANT IS THAT YOU'RE AN AMERICAN NOW.
YOU WILL MAKE A GREAT SOLDIER ONE DAY.
I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TRAILER PARK BOYS IS.
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dersitedreamr · 1 year
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British accent kanaya was crazy. Ppl were handing out British accents to any eloquent person like cheap cigarettes
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navree · 11 months
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i AM going to call her queen camilla, for me
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questintheskies · 1 year
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bloodmaarked · 11 months
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➸ reading list
just added:
the battle drum, saara el-arifi
malice, keigo higashino
the missing american, kwei quartey
your house will pay, steph cha
the firm, john grisham
how can i help you, laura sims
never sleep, fred van lente
the deep sky, yume kitasei
vera wong's unsolicited advice for murderers, jessie q. santo
the murder at the vicarage, agatha christie
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scuopsie · 9 months
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I’ve had similar issues with weight loss (gained weight when i was sick then lost ~25% of what was my entire body weight) and now my girls have deflated 😔 One day i really want to get a lift done, maybe implants too, but it all kinda scares me. I can’t really feel my nips either (or a lot of my body — thanks neuropathy!) so I guess that’s one less thing to worry about 😂 I’m just gonna stick to saving for fillers/botox for my face in the meantime 😬
Hope your recovery keeps going well!! 🖤
Oh gosh... that's a DRASTIC weightloss!!! I can imagine😞😞😞
Okay imma be real with u, im super anti implants kdnddmdk (personal opinion ofc) Other than their fake looking results and the fact that you're adding weights to ur chest, the thought of having two giant external objects being shoved into ur body makes me wanna CRAWL OUT OF MY SKIN... But honestly who am i to tell u what to do 😌 if thats what u want u should totally go for it!!!
Oh i love botox <3 my beloved. I love living in a modern world with modern shit like this kdkkdkd
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Friday, August 12th 2022
an emo cosplaying corporate ✨
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Remember the business card scene from American Psycho?
A real life card-printer took issue with how bad the card in the film actually is (link here):
"There are a few problems with Patrick’s card: the type is set off-center, painfully far to the left edge. It is also set too low so that the tight lower margin of the card is out of balance with the much larger top margin.
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"This gives the card an unhinged appearance, which might speak to the character’s mental state (though we’ll try to steer clear of film and character analysis here and stick to talking about the cards). In addition to the card being out of register, there isn’t a space between the ampersand and “Pierce” in the company name at the top right. Finally, Patrick’s card has a typo that is shared with the other four cards: all incorrectly spell the word “acquisitions” by omitting the c."
Anyway, they fixed it. And if you have the cash to blow, you can get 100 of their fixed (and admittedly quite pretty) version for 75 USD* here.
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*which isn't that bad, but if you can afford to blow that kind of money, why not give it to a highly-effective+transparent charity working to help Ukraine and Ukrainian refugees instead?
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