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castiwls · 1 day

Text

tolerate it - a.s

Paring; anakin x reader

Prompt; 'If it's all in my head, tell me now. Tell me I've got it wrong somehow'

Requested; @simonsbluee

Notes;anakin version:) again all time fav cry song requests are open!

Masterlist | Taylor Swift masterlist

The sound of the door opening pulled your attention from the data pad on your lap. A small smile grew on your lips as you placed the pad beside you before standing from your seat. “Your back,” You grinned. “I didn’t think you were due back for another few days.”

Anakin pulled off his robe before turning to you, his grin just as bright. “We got back early.” He closed the distance between you both pulling you into a hug. You felt his arms squeeze tightly around your middle as you tucked your head into the crook of his neck.

Taking a deep inhale you felt your body relax in his arms. He was safe. After weeks he was finally home again. After a moment you pulled back. His arms still wrapped around your waist. “I missed you.” He spoke quietly, his eyes slowly tracing your face.

“I missed you too.” You smiled slowly rubbing a hand through the back of his head. “How come you’re back so early?”

“Some sort of diplomatic thing.” He let out a breath, rolling his eyes causing you to laugh quietly. You knew how much he hated anything which involved politics. In all the time you’d known Anakin he’d never been one for anything which involved long boring conversations.

“The charity ball?” He nodded his thumb slowly rubbing circles on your waist. “Yeah. How did you know about it?” He frowned slightly, a look of confusion filling his features. “I got invited to,” You watched as a small smile grew on his lips at the idea of not being alone. “Well. That should make this slightly more bearable.”

You nodded thinking for a moment. “We could…we could go…together.” Your voice came out as a whisper. The thought was something which had been sitting on your mind for a while.

Every event you were invited to end up with you having to go alone. It was always the same questions asking when you were going to get into a relationship if you had anyone special in your life. By this point, you had mastered the act of politely brushing off anyone who brought up the topic, but that didn’t mean that it never hurt.

It hurt that you were unable to share your relationship with the other people in your life. That you had to act as if Anakin was nothing more than an acquaintance when you met him in public. You knew getting into this relationship that there would have to be sacrifices, you never expected anything less. But sometimes you wished that he would have enough trust in you to share your relationship with those closest to you.

Anakin let out a sigh, his gaze moving down to your feet. He pursed his lips slightly, looking back up. “Angel, you know we can’t…” He moved a hand to gently cup your check. “If the council found out about us…I don’t know what they’d do.” he frowned to himself as he spoke, his gaze seemingly growing distant for a moment before he re-focused back on you.

“I can’t risk them finding out.” He rubbed a thumb across your cheek. You kept your face passive as you stared at him.

Sometimes your relationship felt almost one-sided. You felt committed to him in a way that he could never commit himself to you. While you knew Anakin was by no means in love with the order and their rules you knew he was still committed. You came second.

The thought had you swallowing, trying to push back the sudden rush of emotions that ran through you. “Fine.” You pulled back from his hold before walking back to the main room. Anakin sighed following closely behind you.

“Are you seriously gonna do this again? You know why we can’t do that. It would put my rank at risk!” He stopped as you turned to face him. You jabbed a finger into his chest. “You. You. You. That’s all it ever is. Do you ever think about what I want?”

“Of course, I think about what you want. You are the most important person in my life!” He reached out to grasp your hand. He lowered his voice as he spoke. “Which is why I can’t lose you.”

You rolled your eyes letting out a quiet breath. “You know, sometimes I feel…I feel like you don’t even love me anymore.” You felt your lips quiver slightly as you swallowed back tears. “Like you're only here out of obligation.”

You watched his face drop slightly. “Of course I love you. You’re my wife.” He stepped closer, his thumb slowly rubbing circles over your palm. “Then why are you so scared of telling the people closest to us that we’re married,” You pulled your palm from his grasp feeling a tear slowly slip down your face.

“There’s dinner on the table if you want it.” You whispered before walking towards the bedroom.

You could hear him calling after you but you simply ignored it slamming the door behind you. Slowly you sank to the ground, your body shaking slightly as sobs began to fall from your lips.

You’d stopped feeling loved a long time ago. At first, you’d believed that the feeling was simply in your head that you were just having doubts about your relationship due to how new it was, yet those doubts never seemed to go away.

And Anakin did nothing to quell those doubts. Taking a breath you placed your chin on your knees, staring at the bed. You never imagined the man who you were supposed to love unconditionally and who was supposed to love you back could leave you feeling so unseen in your own relationship.

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anakin-skywalker-always · 7 months

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padawan/atoc era anakin x reader, they're in love with each other (both jedi) but obviously can't come forward. Anakin confides in Padmé, reader becomes convinced/jealous that anakin is with padme

(bonus points if you can make it angsty and fluffy)

As Easy As Breathing

Hi nonnie! Thank you so, so, so much for this rec! It’s my first one on this account and it’s really quite the christening. Hope its okay, I’m not the best at angst!

Pairing: Padawan!Anakin Skywalker x Padawan!Reader (Star Wars)

Requested: Yes | No

Warnings: none!! Should be all good, let me know if you caught anything I may have missed. Not beta read!

Words: 1.8k

Author’s Notes: Anakin is canonically 19 in AOTC, reader is the same, maybe a year younger. Clone Wars have not yet started in this fic, I’m just assuming Padmé and Anakin stayed besties after the whole nonsense in Phantom Menace.

The warm sun filtering through the windows fell upon Anakin’s face, in a soft moment of solitude, the sounds of the Coruscant cityscape provided him with a brief reprieve to Padmé’s chastising. He often thought that his ability to talk to Padmé about anything was his strength, but in this moment he couldn’t help to think of it as a weakness. Anakin cringed as Padmé continued to berate him; On a rare afternoon off the nineteen-year-old padawan found himself lounging on the senator’s couch.

“Seriously Anakin, you should just-” Padmé stilled, her slender hands finding her hips, huffing, she continued, “Are you even listening to me, Ani?” The forceful tone on his nickname got Anakin’s attention once again.

“I am!” Anakin raised his eyebrows in addition to his hands, in mock surrender. “I swear Padmé!”

The senator found it easy to roll her eyes at his antics, like always. But she could see the change in Anakin, could see how his emotions for his fellow padawan learner have caused conflict in him. Her friend wasn’t sleeping, he wasn’t eating. Padmé knew Anakin was an intense person, a strong personality, everyone knew that about him. But this, this was different. He seemed lost, like he was missing something he needed to operate. Padmé found her way to the couch, sitting beside Anakin, grabbing his tanned, calloused hands in her own.

“Anakin, if you do truely care this strongly for her, you must tell her.” Anakin’s eyes found Padmé’s own. “It would be cruel, to withhold this love.” There was a time in Anakin’s life where this is all he wanted, being with Padmé and he knew his nine-year-old self would be so excited by innocent hand holding. But his nineteen-year-old self was happier to have such a strong, nonjudgemental friend.

“How did you know that you loved Sabé?” Anakin asked gently, knowing how the senator safeguarded her relationship with her handmaiden fiercely.

Anakin noted how Padmé seemed to glow at the mention of her lover. A warm smile graced her pink lips, eyes crinkling at the sides, a faraway glaze coated her sparkling eyes. Her signature in the force felt warm, it wrapped around Anakin’s brain, made him feel safe. Padmé’s love for Sabé was so tangible it extended outside herself, adjusting her force signature.

“I realised I loved Sabé when being around her became a necessity, an honesty, a truth that I did not know I was constantly seeking out.” Padmé gushed, a light trail of pink lit itself over her high cheekbones and freckled nose. “I felt as if Sabé had breathed new life into me everytime I saw her, it was natural, it was right.”

Anakin was quiet for a moment, Padmé became worried that she had overstepped somehow, projected to far onto Anakin’s feelings.

“Loving y/n is as natural as breathing.” He replied.

Anakin rolled over on his hard, standard issue, Jedi temple bed. A sleepless night was not uncommon for him, but this felt inherently different. Padmé’s words from earlier in the day rattled around his brain, demanding to be dealt with. Anakin never saw love as a weakness, never saw attachment as weakness. How could he? Love was the basis of the light, the well of Jedi power that Anakin drew from was a labour of love, was purity, was peace, was built with empathy and centered by knowing himself. His love for you did not make him a bad person.

But he knew it would make him seem like a bad Jedi.

Not knowing your stance on him, on the rule of attachment was slowly eating away at Anakin’s peace.

Groaning aloud, Anakin ran his hands down his face.

Your head whipped around, anxiously. You knew it was embarrassing that you always looked for him in a crowded room, but you could not help it, you felt as if the force was electric until he calmed it. His signature singlehandedly smothering anything else it came in contact with. Being around Anakin, to you, felt as natural as breathing.

“Looking for young Skywalker, are you?” Your master, Mace Windu asks, a small smirk whispers across his face, lightly nudging you in the shoulder. The two of you stood in one of the reception rooms of the Republic building. The Senate was hosting a charity gala with the invite extending to the Jedi temple. So, there you stood, in your best robes, breaking your neck to catch a glimpse of The Chosen One.

“No Master.” You said, quietly. Turning your head away from the powerful Jedi Master to not embarrass yourself further with the luxury of him catching your furious blush. Your master excused himself, laughing, finding Master Plo Kloon.

So, you stood there, alone, foolishly searching the room for your fellow padawan, the one that consumed your mind and soul.

It wasn’t completely unlikely, you reasoned with yourself. You and Anakin were friends, were very well matched, sparring partners. But, Anakin was a good Jedi. A strong Jedi. Following orders wasn’t Anakin’s strongest suit, you’d admit. Pondering whether he would disregard the rules of attachment for you, however, was different.

Nonetheless, like a junkie craving death sticks, you craved Anakin’s presence, his force signature was all you needed to feel right. The anxiety of the gala was too much. Closing your eyes, tightly, you reached out into the force to find him. Anakin’s signature, golden like it always was flocked to your senses, like always.

Opening your eyes, you began to weave through the bustling crowd as quickly as one could who was masquerading as casual.

“I’m not going to say anything to her now, Padmé.” Anakin huffed, rolling his eyes and crossing his arms across his chest, defensively. “Not in front of all these people, you’ve got to be joking.” He scoffed.

Sabé giggled quietly, the two women joined their arms at the elbow. Padmé just rolled her eyes at Anakin’s supposed insoclence.

Your frame weaving through the crowd in his direction caught Anakin’s eye. He smiled, quikly raised a hand, and was delighted when your devastating smile echoed back.

“Anakin.” You greeted him, with a small bow of the head. His name sounded heavenly whenever you deigned to let it fall from your lips. Anakin was convinced he could breathe easier with you around, like he had been purged of something suffocating him.

“Y/N, this is Sen-” You quickly cut him off, not wanting to hear the name of your rival come from his beautiful mouth. Your jealousy that you held for Padmé reared its ugly head, and you couldn’t help to feel shame burn deep inside the space between ribs.

“Senator Amidala, a pleasure it is to finally meet you,” You stuck your hand out, awkwardly hoping for a handshake. “Anakin has told me so much.” Cordial. It was a good tactic. You were a good person, a good jedi. You would not succumb to jealousy. Besides, Padmé had other qualities you were far more jealous of than just her nonexistent romantic relationship that you deludedly conjured up in your mind when you tried to sleep at night.

“All good things I should hope.” She smiled, her soft hand finding your own, a small shake. You could empathise with Anakin for falling in love with someone like her. Someone so intelligent, powerful, beautiful.

It was not lost on you, the way the senator’s hand quickly found the one of the woman she stood beside.

“This is Sabé.” Anakin started, introducing Padmé’s guest. “Padmé’s hand-” For the second time tonight, but surely not the last, Anakin was cut off.

“My partner.” Senitor Amidala said firmly, though her eyes twinkled with pride. Sabé’s own shock manifested itself into a wide smile. The two looked eachother in the eyes and you couldn’t help but feel silly. Of course. Of course.

For whatever reason, the words you thought you had died swiftly in your mouth, “Oh.” was all you managed to get out. “A pleasure to meet you too, Sabé.” You tried quickly to save the situation, to save embarrassment. But Padmé’s slight smile, Sabé’s coy smirk. You felt like the two Naboo women knew you, saw you. They somehow, in this embarrassing blunder of a meeting had already clocked that you harboured feelings for Anakin Skywalker. It made you feel foolish, moreso than what you already did.

“If you’d excuse us, Jedi, we have futher business to attend to.” Sabé quipped strongly, leading her senator lover to the next group of politicians. The art of smalltalk was something else you could add to the list of Padmé’s items you were jealous of.

Anakin turned to you, chuckling. His standard-issue Jedi robes moving effortlessly with his chest. Running a hand through his cropped hair, you felt his eyes scanning your face. You knew your blood would betray you, like it so often did around your friend, rising to the surface of your cheeks, splattering down your neck and chest. Embarrassment clung to you like a rash.

“Don’t mind them, they like setting me up.” Anakin scoffed, shaking his head.

“Setting you up for what?” You asked, eyeing him micheviously. Chatting with Anakin felt natural; He was quick witted and liked challenging you, he was a tease.

And, more often than not, a flirt.

This was different though, Anakin had an air of nervousness about him. You noticed as your fellow padawan’s large, veiny hands found the way to the back of his neck, rubbing sheepishly.

“Oh you know…” He trailed off, looking everywhere except for your eyes, his own blue ones scanning the ornate ceiling of the reception room. “Setting us up to be alone together.” He admitted, squinting as if the words bought him some kind of physical pain.

You quirked a brow, your arms quickly crossing your chest - a defensive stance. “Would that be so bad? Being alone together?” The words meant to be teasing, non-serious. But it was too late, the seed was planted in Anakin’s brain.

To him, that felt like an admission of sorts, an admission that you wanted him as much as he wanted you. Well, if he squinted it seemed like that.

In a tender moment, something rare for Anakin, he reached out. Tucking stray hairs behind your ear, gently following your padawan braid around the cusp of it.

“You know, y/n, that I want nothing more,” He smiled. It was pure, and real. You felt the sincerity in the force, the truth within him. Moreso, you felt your ear burn from the brief contact, felt your heart swell in your chest at the mere thought of being alone in close quarters with him. “I want nothing more than to be alone with you.”

He retracted his hand, but you still felt alight with his closeness. His force signature felt palpable, you were enraptured in his warmth. He was golden. Your golden boy.

“Why don’t we go get lost then?” You whispered, scared anything too loud would betray your eagerness. Anakin’s smile split across his face, eyes crinkling and dimples showing. Smirking he placed a strategic hand at the low of your back. He was so incredibly tall, bending over you to whisper back,

“After you, my lady.”

—--

AN: Hehe all done! Left it open for more if you wanted, but teasing enough to be left as it is! Hope it’s alright and I hope you could enjoy at least some of it <3

P.S This is a side account, my main is @mayhemories, so I will be answering any comments with that account but rest assured it is still me :) <3

Much love, El.

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leviathanspain · 10 months

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anakin smut? where reader is having sexual fantasies about him and he can… feel… it ?🫣

ashamed

anakin skywalker x reader

smut

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

you were loud. at least your thoughts were. anakin heard everything, from what you were going to eat for breakfast, to what clothes you’d wear to training.

anakin almost missed it. a small, fleeting thought that meaninglessly floated around in your head, and right into his.

he looks good today..

your thoughts had been heard before he even saw you, and as he turned, there you were, not even looking at him.

anakin’s mouth pulled back into a smirk and he continued to walk, not even bothering to greet you.

it was hard being around him. training had just finished and all you wanted was him. seeing his muscles under those training clothes had left you more than hot and bothered.

you were ravenous.

a jedi was never supposed to engage in any relationships. but it didn’t mean you couldn’t fantasize about it.

you laid on your bed, body worn out after all that training, anakin would be home soon, and he would want to unwind by using you. your body for his, you were willing to let him do whatever he wanted to you.

“hey babe..” his voice trilled as the door shut behind him, carefully you watched him, greeting him back with a smile. but he knew what kind of smile that was, and he was already unbuckling his pants as he walked up.

“what’s wrong?” he had noticed the way you didn’t move off the bed, the way you looked a little breathless. you shrugged slightly, “tough day training.”

anakin’s eyebrows rose, “oh.” you nodded, a small sigh escaping your lips. anakin neared the bed, crawling up by your legs, “maybe i can make you feel better.”

anakin stopped mid sentence. he could taste it. taste something, familiar yet wildly different. anakin dismissed himself from the room full of his superiors and instead went out into the empty hall.

he could feel it. you.

it was you.

anakin inhaled sharply as he felt something graze his crotch, a hand that wasn’t even physically there.

and there was that taste again.

“oh ani..” you moaned out, your words echoed into the room and anakin growled softly, tugging at himself as he lined up with your hole. he had been taking care of you for almost an hour now, fucking you with his mouth until you screamed his name.

now he promised that you wouldn’t dare to forget it.

anakin was slumped down in his room. he had left upon feeling his pants tighten with the size of his erection. now all he could do was trade reality for fantasy as he felt everything you had thought.

he felt it all, and it all left him wanting the real thing. if that’s how you thought about him…

“anakin! don’t stop!” you cried out, gripping his forearms as he thrusted into you, your head crashing into the wall behind you, you groaned softly, “fuck..”

you were writhing on your bed, eyes closed as you let your fantasy play out.

“oh ani!”

a knock suddenly broke your thoughts and you turned, embarrassed, but you got up, knowing they would have no way of knowing what you had been doing.

picturing your jedi master in that way? incred-

“anakin!” the unexpected sight of him at the door, sweating, disheveled, and his robes barely hanging on, he stomped into the room before you could even ask why he was there.

“why didn’t you tell me you wanted me to fuck you?” there it was. it was like nails on a chalkboard.

“what?” your face got red immediately, heat burned on it and you laughed weakly, closing the door, you walked over to him, but you kept your distance, “what are you talking about?”

anakin rolled his eyes, “don’t try and lie to me. i could hear you, i could feel you. i need this to end-“ your face turned into a grimace and you closed your eyes with absolute shock at the revelation, “just let me fuck you. i cant-“ anakin pulled his robes back and highlighted his cock, which was fighting the fabric.

you stared at anakin, “but-“

anakin didn’t even bother to say anything more as he pulled you into his arms, kissing you swiftly as he threw you down.

“don’t be ashamed.”

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cosmicanakin · 3 months

Text

thinkin' about nerd!anakin & popular!reader.

adult content | minors do NOT interact.

you slip into the kitchen where anakin is bustling about working on some new prototype. sliding your arms around his waist from behind, you press a kiss to the center of his back between his shoulder blades. “how's it going in here, handsome?”

he turns with a brilliant grin, still tinkering as he talks. “just fine tuning some upgrades. got paired with lydia for the engineering project and she has some innovative ideas i want to test out. speaking of, i should give her a call and we can brainstorm some more.”

your smile falters slightly at the mention of lydia. you know she's a notorious nerd, just like anakin, but something about them working so closely together rubs you the wrong way. “right, your partner. do you have to call her right now?” you pout, pulling him in for an embrace.

anakin chuckles, nuzzling your nose. “yes sweetheart, we're trying to stay on track to finish early like the good students we are. don't worry, you know you're the only girl for me.” he pecks your lips softly before slipping from your arms to grab his phone.

reluctantly, you follow anakin to the couch and flop down beside him with a huff. his call connects and lydia's face popped up on the screen, pale skin and dark hair framed by thick glasses like usual. “hey anakin!” she greets excitedly, straightening her cardigan.

“hey lydia, y/n's here too.” he smiles, sliding an arm around your shoulders. you force a tight lipped grin and wave. lydia smiles politely in return but her eyes linger on anakin a moment too long for your liking.

“so, tell me more about these water filtration designs you were working on,” anakin prompts, always eager to delve into his passion. lydia launches into an enthusiastic ramble about her concepts that has anakin hanging onto every word with rapt attention.

you try to contain your rising irritation as they converse in advanced terminology far over your head. anakin's eyes sparkle with interest and admiration for lydia's brilliant mind and you feel increasingly out of place. her cheeks flush under his praise and gaze.

that's the final straw. subtlety clearly isn’t working so you decide on a new approach. shifting into anakin's lap, you drape yourself over him and start peppering his jaw and neck with heated kisses. he inhales sharply in surprise.

“y/n, wh-what are you doing?” he stammers breathily as you continue your affectionate assault. you raise your eyes to the screen and smirk at lydia, who watches with parted lips and pink cheeks of her own.

“sorry to interrupt,” you say feigning your innocence, grinding down into anakin’s lap. he suppresses a soft groan, hands coming to grasp your hips unconsciously. lydia averts her eyes, clearing her throat awkwardly.

“i can see you two are, uh, busy. maybe i should let you go.” she mumbles, shuffling notes in front of her screen. anakin nods frantically, eyes fuzzy with desire. “y-yeah, probably for the best. we'll, um, talk tomorrow lydia. bye!”

you end the call with a tap of your finger before he can prolong it further. capturing anakin's lips hungrily, you roll your hips firmly into his growing erection. he melts into the kiss with a whiny moan.

“fuck y/n, what's gotten into you? not that iʼm complaining,” he pants as you drag open mouthed kisses along his jaw. you nip at his earlobe teasingly. “just reminding you who you belong to, honey. now, shall we take this discussion to the bedroom?”

without awaiting his response, you tug anakin to his feet and backward down the hall. he obeys willingly, worshipping your neck and shoulders all the way. you push him down onto the mattress, quickly removing your clothes in a flurry.

anakin lays watching with blown pupils and parted lips, caressing the prominent bulge in his pants. “god, you're so beautiful.” you crawl over him like a lioness, pinning his body down and rocking your sensitive core against his clothed bulge.

“say it,” you command breathily. “say you're mine.” anakin moans at the delicious contact, already putty in your possessive hands. “i'm yours, and only yours.” satisfaction blooms in your chest at his submission.

you make good and sure to brand that fact into his memory that night, until he's left whimpering your name in a blissful puddle. no one, not even lydia, would ever come between you again if you had anything to say about it. this boy belonged to you heart, body and mind.

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anakincentric · 5 months

Text

warnings: prompt, angst, hurt/comfort, established relationship, size difference, abuse in the past mention (m receiving).

"you are such a meanie!" you cry, your voice hoarse from the argument. you whirl around to retreat to the bedroom, your emotions boiling over and needing a sanctuary.

"oh, what? you gonna go cry about it, huh? well, fine!" anakin shouts after you, punctuating his anger with a kick to the coffee table, flipping it over. you flinch from the loud noise, you hate when he gets like this. fat, hot tears roll down your cheeks and when you turn to close the bedroom door, he catches a glimpse of your colored and hopeless expression. he's seen it before, but he'll never get used to it.

"i hate you!" you yell. his heart clenches, instant regret tinging his countenance as you slam the door shut to cut yourself off from his view.

the sob takes over because you're unable to control it, unable to quiet it. it wracks through you as you throw yourself onto the bed. the bed you and anakin share. so much love has happened here, and now you taint it with your tears. your little hands clutch onto the covers, bunching them up underneath you like a little nest, burying your wet face into the mattress to muffle your cries. you didn't mean to say it like that, didn't mean to say it at all. you wanted to tell him you hate when he gets cold and callous during a fight, how he mocks your sensitivity because it's something he's told you was "beat" out of him as a child. to show emotion is to show weakness in his eyes. you thought he was getting better with that.

anakin can hear you through the door. he knows you don't actually wanna be alone, that you need him, but he's unsure if you're ready to accept him right now. there's still anger in his chest, and with every step toward the door he condemns himself. tentatively, he reaches for the handle, and stops himself. instead, he places his palm onto the surface. your little whimpers break him, twisting his expression as he closes his eyes, trying to think of what to say. he leans his forehead onto it, think think think. he tells himself.

you hear the weight of the front door open and shut, and knowing he's gone makes everything crash down on you harder than before. you curl yourself up into a little ball, and let your upset run its course through you until it exhausts you. you fall asleep with your cheeks sticky from tears.

"baby...?" you hear a voice through your dreams. it's soft, comforting. it's like light, and you follow it. a warm hand traverses your back soothingly, and you stir. "angel..." the voice calls again, and you recognize it. a pang of hurt occurs when you see in your mind's eye who that voice belongs to. as happy as you are that he's near, at the same time you're frustrated that he dares to think he can be. you shy away from his touch, so he moves his hand away, shifting in his seat and you feel how his body weighs down the mattress where he sits. "i got you something."

you don't say anything.

"do you still hate me?" he asks quietly, and guilt grips you as you're reminded of your harsh words.

"no." you state plainly, reserving yourself to show him you're still mad at him.

"can you look at me?"

you swallow, and bring yourself to turn. you blink the sleep from your eyes, long lashes still wet from your crying. your hair is a matted mess, and you brush it from your forehead. he tilts his head at you.

"you hungry?" you nod, registering the recognizable brown paper bag in his hand. all crinkled from his hold on it to keep the top closed, and the heat trapped inside. "sit up." you do, hugging your covered knees to your chest. he sets the bag in the crevice of your lap, a straw tucked in the webbing of his thumb that he keeps as he retrieves a drink from the nightstand. the ice rattles, and he frees the straw from the paper, putting it in for you as you dig into the brown paper bag. your favorite food waiting for you inside.

a grin stretches onto your lips, you'd been craving this for a while, and it always makes you happy when he gets you things without asking. somehow he knows it always softens you up to be bought food. eagerly you dig in, your stomach growling on instinct. it smells so good, and when he hands you your drink, you sip on it.

after a couple grounding bites, things don't seem so bleak anymore. and while he waited for you, he sat on the edge of the bed with you. his ankle resting on his knee, his device in his hand, scrolling mindlessly. he senses you looking at him, and he faces you, caught by surprise when you tug him over for a kiss.

·˚ ₊˚ˑ taglist - add yourself here. @sleepycreativewriter @aerangi @xstarkillerx @loveliestgeek @crazyforbyler

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bunnylovesani · 4 months

Text

The Other Woman

Summary: An office relationship with the married Mr Skywalker doesn’t have the happy ending you were hoping for.

Content warnings: Smut with angst, infidelity, p in v sex, degradation, creampie

Wc: 1.5k

“How long until she comes?” Your voice tremors in anticipation as you rip off Anakin’s tie and claw at the buttons of his crisp collared shirt.

“Hopefully half an hour, I told her my meeting ran over” He pushes you down onto his work desk and his hands snake their way up your thighs, ripping the thin material of your tights apart completely once he got high enough.

“Daddy!” You gasp as the sound of ripping fills the office.

“No one’s gonna see, baby.” He murmurs into your neck as he plants sloppy kisses all over your collarbones before trailing down to your chest.

“Such slutty little outfits you wear, you trying to seduce your boss?” He rips open your sheer blouse hungrily and tuts when he sees how exposed you are. “Not wearing a bra around a married man. Should be ashamed of yourself.” He grumbles as he seals his lips around your nipple, sucking it forcefully while he kneads your other breast- wedding band glinting in the dim light.

“I’m such a slut, ‘m sorry, daddy.” You whimper at the way he’s attacking your tits, teeth grazing your delicate skin and leaving red marks. It’s true, you did feel like a slut; you’d had a crush on Mr Skywalker from the moment he hired you and you didn’t seem to care one bit that he was married.

“Bend over and I’ll teach you a lesson.” He pops your nipple out of his mouth, a trail of drool connecting you. “Now.”

You hop off his desk and position yourself over it, ass in the air while your wet tits pressed against the cold wood. You feel him hook his fingers over your panties and slowly drag them down, a groan escaping him once he sees your glistening arousal.

“Being a little homewrecker gets you this wet, huh?” You wince as his thick fingers trail down your folds, smearing the sinful evidence of your adultery everywhere. Your face burns with shame when you hear the familiar clink of his belt unbuckling, deepening in its redness when you feel the head of his cock prodding at your entrance.

“Tell me how much you want it.” He teases, slipping in the very tip for just a second before pulling back. “Beg.”

“I want it so bad Ani.” You squirm restlessly, aching with the desire to be filled “Please daddy, please! I’ll do anything for you.” Your sweet voice rings out sincerely.

At first you’d told yourself you’d never get involved with someone like him- that it was beneath you as a woman of upstanding moral character. Then after the first time you’d sucked his cock under the desk while he held a meeting, you comforted yourself with the reassurance that it would be a purely sexual relationship, nothing more. Now that the thought of him finally permeated your every waking moment, you had run out of excuses. You were in love with a married man.

“Oh, I know you would, baby.” He chuckles, sensing your fragility. He tries to be sensitive but he finds the way you debase yourself for him too amusing not to laugh at. “Take it.”

With one forceful thrust, he pushes his cock all the way inside you, the tight walls of your pussy closing in as if to claim him. His hand reaches round to clamp over your mouth as he brings you closer to him, the cold metal of the watch on his wrist sizzling against your burning flesh. Your body is set alight with desire once you feel him flush against you, his toned abdomen slapping against your ass as he pounds into you mercilessly.

You spot the framed photo of Anakin and his wife perched at the edge of his desk and you scowl at the unpleasant sight. Being made to stare at her mockingly beaming face while you’re giving your pussy out to him filled you with a foul possessiveness that caused you to extend your arm out and knock the frame off the table. Anakin pauses for a moment and peers over to observe the broken fragments of glass sprawled out across the carpet.

“Oops.”

You don’t dare to look back and meet his gaze, instead burying your face in your arms as you arch your back further.

“So we’ve finally reached the point where you’re starting to get jealous, hm?” He pushes back into you frustratingly slowly, his thrusts deep but unsatisfying. “Answer me.” He wraps his hand around your hair and pulls you back when he’s met with silence.

“Yes! I’m fucking jealous. You shouldn’t be with her, you should be with me- you should be mine! I hate her.” You spit out venomously, taken aback by the resentment that seeped out.

“Show me.” He replies simply, eyes wide open and lips parted. Your heart leaps at the opportunity to prove yourself so you get up, swiftly swapping positions as you push Anakin onto the desk with more strength than you knew you had. He’s taken aback by your fervour and does nothing but lie back as you climb onto him, pencil skirt hitched up to your hips. You lower his trousers down a little more before sinking onto him, ravenous with the desire to be consumed whole by him and all that he is. He stares at you through narrowed eyes, disbelief flitting through them. It was no secret you had a big crush on him but he didn’t realise until he saw you just then- in the throes of passionate desperation, that it was clear as day.

“I love you, Anakin.” You whine, verbalising his worst fears. He says nothing back as you bounce on his cock, each rebound filled with more ardour and torment. The familiar twitching deep inside you let you know he was close so you ground your hips against his with the most fire you could muster, the squelching and slapping becoming resoundingly loud as you fought the blazingly painful feeling of him slipping away. His breath hitched and a deep groan rumbled from the depths of his chest as he grabbed your soft thighs and spilt his cum deep inside you. A numbness overcame you when you looked him in the eyes after his breath settled and it became clear; without a shadow of a doubt, you had lost him. Once he pulled out, you would never be one ever again.

“C’mon darling, get off.” He softly sighs, head bowed while you remain frozen in place.

“That was the last time, wasn’t it?” You ask, feeling a torrent of tears building. He screws his eyes shut as he nods hesitantly and you feel your heart being bloodily ripped out from your chest.

“It’s for the best. I don’t want to hurt you.” You scoff mirthlessly at the irony of his words.

“Do you not love me at all?” After debasing yourself in every possible way, all that was left to do was give him your ego to destroy.

“I love my wife.” He replies resolutely and you can almost hear the nail being hammered into the coffin that was your relationship.

Stumbling off the desk, you fall onto his leather chair and the world around you goes fuzzy. You can vaguely hear him encouraging you to get dressed as he gestures to the alarm clock on his desk but it’s not enough to puncture your daze. Before you can register what’s going on, he’s dressing you- slipping on your underwear and zipping up your skirt as “I’m sorry”’s spilled from his unfaithful lips. Your body was not your own- all you could focus on was not falling apart entirely as you were wheeled out of his office and left standing frailly by the elevator. He presses the button with a ding as he straightens out your blouse and runs his knuckles softly over your cheeks, staring into your eyes apologetically. “I really am sorry, baby.” He whispers as the elevator doors open with a chirpy ding. You retreat soullessly into the cold metal box as you see a woman brush past you.

“Oh, hey honey! Waiting for me?” Padme’s strident voice is heard as she steps out of the lift and embraces Anakin with a light chuckle.

“Hey, sweetheart.” He pulls her into a hug right before your eyes, his broad hand resting over the back of her head as he pulls her into his chest protectively- just like he did with you. “I’m all ready to go.” He announces absent-mindedly.

“It’s about time, we almost missed dinner! This company is really working you to the bone, you must be shattered.” She rambles on, still wrapped around him.

“Yeah, you could say that.” He mumbles as he stares straight at you, his mournful gaze permanently burned into your memory as the doors shut before you.

You hoped the whirring of the moving elevator would mask the wail you let out as you collapsed, the pain of your heart and soul crumbling too much to bear. You loved him. You loved him and you were going to have to find a new job.

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#hayden christensen #anakin skywalker #star wars fanfiction #anakin skywalker smut #anakin Skywalker angst #anakin skywalker fanfiction #anakin x reader #anakin x you #anakin fanfiction #star wars smut

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bloatedandalone04 · 1 year

Text

Back To You

➪the one where anakin is slipping away and needs you more than ever.

Part 1 | HAPPY MAY THE 4TH (had to get this out for today)

Warnings: self deprecating thoughts once again, anakin on the verge of turning evil, angst, fluff, insecurities, mentions of insecurities, mentions of death, urges to kill

Word Count: 4.3k

Do not repost this anywhere, reblogs are fine <3

Your reflection stared back at you, your own eyes looking at you with pity.

Poor, lonely Y/n.

With tense shoulders, you shudder out a deep breath and avert your eyes to the marble of the countertop.

You hated when your thoughts ran around in your head like this. It didn’t happen often, no, not anymore. You weren’t a teen anymore, you had no excuse to feel like this, yet you just couldn’t help yourself.

Taking deep breaths to calm yourself down, you miss the way Anakin appears in the doorway, his brows furrowed and his shoulders tense, matching yours. “Y/n,” it was as if he knew what was happening, felt the way your own body was attacking itself with a sense of hatred and burden.

You look back up and meet his eyes in the mirror, a small whine of embarrassment leaving you. “I wish you wouldn’t see me like this,”

Anakin hadn’t seen you act this way in many months, not since you were on the verge of becoming an adult. Your shoulders shaking beyond your control, the crease in your forehead, the quiver in your voice. He hated all of it.

“Wish all you want,” he said as he stepped into the room. “I still see you.”

Crossing the short distance, Anakin stands behind you, his height towering over yours as you look at each other in the mirror. “You want to know what I see?” You quietly ask him and he stays silent, his eyes giving you a look of warning that told you all you needed to know. No, if you see anything negative about yourself and voice it to him, he doesn’t want to know what you see. You say it anyway. “I see someone unworthy of love, of being cherished. I don’t see a powerful warrior like I’ve been told I am. I’m nothing.”

Ankin places his hands on your waist, his grip firm as he stares you down in the reflection. “That is not true and you know it,” his voice was stern and left no room for arguments.

But you were far too stubborn for your own good, a trait Anakin saw in himself and one of the many reasons he fell for you in the first place. “But it is true, Ani,” you protested, looking at yourself with a hint of embarrassment and disgust. “Look at me.”

“I am,” his voice was the most serious you had ever heard it, something that makes you promptly stop talking. You weren’t intimated, no, Anakin would never put you in a situation in which he held his power and strength over you, but you were, however, intrigued. So much so you waited for him to continue, a ghost of a frown painted on your lips. “You are so much more than that. Your mind may betray you, but it doesn’t mean it’s right. You are strong and more powerful than you even know. One day you will save this galaxy, and you don’t even know it yet.”

Your lip quivers and you repress showing the chill that runs down your spine. “What if I don’t believe that?”

“You will,” he affirms. His arms wrap around your middle and he leans down so his chin is hovering over your shoulder. You rest your arms over his as you hold eye contact, your sight slightly blurred. “And until that time comes, I’ll be here to remind you just how powerful you are.”

One by one, all the happy memories Anakin had with you faded into nothing, his heart cracking each time he felt a part of him slip away.

His body nearly gave up on itself as he stumbled his way through the temple. One of his hands shot out to catch himself, his palm pressing flat against the wall as he steadied his footing. “Get it together, Anakin,” he muttered to himself, taking a deep breath in hopes to relieve some of the pressure he felt was weighing him down.

It was then when Obi-Wan rounded the corner and saw his padawan struggling to keep himself up right. He was at his side in seconds, his hand wrapping around the younger man’s arm and pulling him into a standing position. “Anakin,” he said, worry lacing his words. “Are you alright?”

Anakin gave him a slow nod, his dull eyes focused on the stone of the floor. He thinks back to his last conversation with you, a full three weeks ago, and his eyes abruptly shut, your words repeating in his head before leaving his own mouth. “I fear I’ve fallen ill,”

Obi-Wan gives him a concerned look, placing a firm hand on his shoulder. “Take it easy,” he says, noticing the way Anakin refused to show him his eyes and the way his chest rose and fell with heavy breaths. “Relax, Anakin. You’re needed for the mission of protecting Senator Padmè and we can’t have you falling weak a few days before you’re set to leave.”

Anakin felt his ears begin to burn at the mention of Padmè, his jaw locking tightly as he lifted his head. He still refused to meet the eyes of his good friend, his shoulder raising quickly and making Obi-Wan’s hand fall off it. “I’ll be fine,” he muttered before walking forward and leaving the older man behind with a worried look.

His strides were quick, his chest heavy with a rage he had never felt before as he opened the door to his room with a rough shove.

Protecting Padmè? The woman he had not spoken to since the night you left him? Putting his life on the line for the person who was the reason he hadn’t been happy in weeks? The one who helped him destroy the best thing in his life?

Not a chance.

Anakin’s shoulders tensed up as the door slammed shut behind him, his eyes flickering all over the near-empty room.

He wasn’t as in control as he thought he was, and that much was obvious when he turned the entire place upside down a mere ten minutes after you walked out the door.

He couldn’t help it, everything reminded him of you.

The thought of staying in this room that had always meant to shield you from the harsh reality by himself was one that kept him up at night. The dark circles that had formed under his eyes the day after you left him had become a seemingly permanent addition to his appearance.

He almost didn’t recognise himself when he first noticed the deep and dark marks that shadowed his face. He assumed they’re from the lack of sleep he was getting, or not getting.

He couldn’t sleep without you. He found that out pretty quickly.

After he had finished destroying every piece of furniture in the communal area of the room, he felt his bones ache with exhaustion. His eyes were burning and his hand was sore from throwing anything it could grab a hold of. Yet, as he made his way to the bed, the same one he had been holding you on - if only for a couple of seconds that he wished he could have back - only minutes prior, he discovered that he couldn’t fall asleep.

His mind wouldn’t turn off, past memories with you flashing behind his eyes at a rapid pace. As he tried to get his body to relax and succumb to the darkness, he had no control over the way his hand twitched in the direction in which you always were, right beside him. Your side of the bed was cold, yet another thing he wasn’t used to as you were always there, for him to hold, for him to hide with.

Now, three weeks later, and he is no better. He had gotten about five hours of sleep in total during the time he spent away from you, and it wasn’t something he had a say in.

He wasn’t able to sleep in the bed, that much was obvious after his first failed attempt. After he rummaged through the dresser and grabbed onto one of your robes, he held onto the fabric with both hands. His face buried in it as he fell to the floor, his back pressed to the end of the bed.

He fell asleep a few minutes after that, a death grip on your robe - one of the few things he had left of you. When he awoke half an hour later, he was met with the still dark sky and a pain in his lower back.

It didn’t take him long to start tearing apart that dresser.

The few times he fell asleep after that were at random.

While waiting for Obi-Wan to show up for a day of training, Anakin had fallen asleep against the wall of the meditation room. He was woken up an hour later by another Jedi who looked at him with concern and a bit of pity, something Anakin loathed.

His sleep schedule consisted of quick naps in the most bizarre places, one being behind the wheel of his ship - that one nearly ended in a fatality for both him and Obi-Wan. Seeing as he was supposed to be the best pilot in all the galaxy, Anakin took Obi-Wan’s lecture without trying to defend himself as he didn’t even know what was wrong with him.

His sleep state wasn’t even a safe space. He had one dream about you, one where you came back and you held him and kissed him and told him everything he needed and had been desperate to hear.

The rest were nightmares. Or nothing at all. A void.

Anakin felt like a ghost, a shell of who he used to be.

He wasn’t happy, wasn’t consumed with excitement whenever he was set to fly, wasn’t filled with a sense of pride whenever he successfully completed a quick mission.

He felt like his body was betraying him, and the fact that he hadn’t seen even a glimpse of you since you left didn’t help at all.

The temple was big, but he didn’t realise it was massive enough to keep you hidden from him for three weeks.

Three weeks.

Nearly four without you.

Anakin was sure that when the one month mark hit, his body would no longer function at his control. It hardly was now, so he was not looking forward to seeing how he would be in a week from now.

He turns right and enters the bedroom, everything untouched with the exception of the broken dresser beside the door. His eyes narrowed on the bed and he felt, what had to be, the hundredth sharp stab that pierced his heart in the past few weeks.

“I’m nervous,” you nearly whispered, your hands running over Anakin’s bare shoulders. A single candle was lit and placed on the nightstand a couple feet from where his body hovered over yours on the bed. The flicker of orange made him look so innocent, so young and carefree, a sight you quickly decided was a blessing to see. “Will it hurt?”

Anakin leaned down and placed a kiss on your forehead, his arms tightening around your frame. “Maybe for a bit,” he murmured against your skin. “We don’t have to do this tonight. I don’t want you to feel rushed.”

You shake your head, your nose brushing against his as you did so. “I want to do this, I promise,” your words are quiet and the only sound that fills the dark room. It was just you and him, the outside world blocked by a door and the curtains that covered the window. You had never felt more safe. “I need this. We need this.”

It was true.

Anakin would be sent away the following morning on what would be his longest absence yet. While you had grown used to his day long missions, this one was said to be no less than a couple weeks. He had never spent that long away from you and he wasn’t coping that well with the thought of leaving you behind.

The decision to do this tonight was mutual.

He needed something to hold onto until he returned to you, and you needed the feeling of being completely loved and wanted to get you through the weeks you’d spend without him.

Anakin nodded, capturing your lips in a gentle kiss before reaching over and taking your hand in his. “Only for a bit,” he said again before the distance was closed once more.

Anakin felt the last good memory slip away from him and his eyes darkened, an ache in his jaw as he clenched it again.

He was going to do the mission; the one where they would be counting on him to keep Padmè out of harm’s way and protect her with his life.

However, what they didn’t know was that Anakin was now treating this as a form of justice, or, in other words, an assassination.

“Y/n,” Obi-Wan greeted as he entered the meditation room. “I’ve finally found you.”

His smile was kind but told you that he wasn’t here to talk about anything good. You return the smile as best as you could, sitting up straighter and holding eye contact with him. “Master,” you say back, brows furrowing when the smile was replaced with a frown. “What’s wrong? Did something happen?”

The man nodded, his fingers tugging on the sleeve of his shirt in a way that showed he was nervous but was trying to hide it. “It’s Anakin Skywalker,” he said and you quickly looked away. “Something is troubling him.”

Your eyes focus on the floor as you fight the urge to cry in front of Obi-Wan. It would give away the very real fact that you were well aware of what Anakin was going through, and the fact you were in a forbidden relationship with the Jedi.

Anakin.

You hadn’t heard his name in weeks, cutting off any communication with him and anyone affiliated with him, including the very man standing in front of you. Guilt creeped into you, the same guilt that had plagued you since the moment you left the crying man by himself in the room you no longer felt at home in.

The weeks you spent without the man you loved were brutal.

You had been struck with an overwhelming feeling of guilt and you carried it with you every day. Your heart broke every time you heard the hushed whispers of fellow Jedi about how the supposed ‘Chosen One’ was failing to do the simplest of tasks and had become a weak version of himself. One that didn’t show up to important meetings, didn’t give his all on quick and easy missions, and looked like he hadn’t gotten a wink of sleep in months.

The one who looked on the verge of falling to the dark side.

You didn’t want to think about that last one, despite the numerous times you’ve heard it be brought up. Never did you ever think Anakin would become the worst version of himself, become a person he was so far from and forget about everything that made him the powerful Jedi he had been for so long now.

There was no way it was because of you and how you left things. How could it? How could you mean so much to someone that they’d forget all they worked for, fought for, bled for, just because you were no longer a constant in their life?

It just didn’t make sense to you, but then again, the fact that you even had a sliver of Anakin Skywalker in the first place didn’t make a whole lot of sense, either.

He was too good for you, too kind and caring and someone who deserved the world. Something you couldn’t give him, no matter how much you wanted to.

You wanted to give him any and everything he asked for and more, but you couldn’t. And you would never be able to.

You couldn’t even give yourself the time of day and dedication needed to progress in your life, so how could you possibly help Anakin in any way?

The question had you looking up and meeting the eyes of Obi-Wan once again. “What does that have to do with you looking for me?”

“If I recall correctly, you and Anakin were quite close not too long ago,” he said and you tried to ignore the way your heart skipped a beat and how you wanted to point out just how close the two of you had been. “Is that right?”

You nodded quickly, eyes focusing on the wall behind him. “We were, but not anymore,”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Obi-Wan gave you a look of pity before he continued, “Anakin is a good person, someone who I find myself looking up to. I’m afraid something has happened….something that could lead to his demise.”

That made you stand up, your brows pressing together as you stepped closer. “What do you mean?”

The man hesitated before swallowing harshly. “I’ve been observing him and I’m worried about what I’ve seen so far. He hasn’t been sleeping or focusing. Just this morning I found him against a wall, unable to hold himself up,” he says. “He wouldn’t look me in the eye. I can’t help but fear the worst.”

Your eyes flicker between his. “What are you saying?”

You share a look before he places a hand on your shoulder. “I’m afraid we’re losing him to something he should have never seen or felt,”

“Anakin!” Your hand turned the doorknob before you could even think about knocking first. Stepping into the room, you let out a quiet gasp at the sight of destruction. Not a single thing was how you left it, not even the side of the door that faced the inside of the room. It was dented and beaten in, hints of blood here and there that told you exactly what had happened to the wood.

You stumble your way through the now unfamiliar room and head straight towards the bedroom, where you’re met with a demolished dresser. The rest of the room seemed untouched and you bent down to pick up one of your shirts, fisting the material in your hand. The rest of your clothing was thrown around the floor, some stuck on the corner of the bed that looked like it hadn’t been slept in since you left.

Dropping the shirt, you turn around after coming to the conclusion that the room was empty. You stand outside the door that led to the bathroom, your hand hovering over the doorknob.

He had to be in there, and that thought had your heart beating rapidly.

With a firm twist, your fingers press against the door and push.

Standing in front of the mirror was Anakin, his eyes glossy and staring at his reflection. His shoulders were stiff, his whole body tense in a way that had you swallowing nervously. His hands gripped the marbled countertop tightly, his knuckles turning a few shades lighter as heavy pants left his mouth.

Pushing back a small ounce of uncertainty, you step into the room. He must have been deep in thought as he didn’t notice the door open or your smaller figure enter the room. You were afraid to ask what was going on in that pretty head of his. It had to be something awful to have him this out of it.

“Anakin,” You say his name quietly, almost to the point of it being inaudible.

But he heard you. Whatever daydream he was in was ripped away the second your voice hit his ears. His eyes moved from his own and met yours in the reflection, the crease in his brow softening as a shaky breath left his lips. The feeling of relief was short-lived. “You’re not real,” he muttered, not giving you a second glance as his eyes went back to being stone cold.

It was then when you realised how much you truly meant to the poor boy. You really had no idea that you, of all people, could mean this much to someone, let alone the perfection that is Anakin.

He was so messed up to the point where he didn’t even believe he was actually seeing you.

You felt your heart break all over again. “What have I done to you?” You ask, holding back a dry sob as you take a daring step closer. “Anakin…it’s me.”

He only shook his head, his chin tilting downwards as he muttered something under his breath.

You blink back a tear or two as you cross the room, your hand tugging on his arm. “Look at me,” you nearly cry out, your grip making him turn slightly. His eyes left the mirror and landed on you. The blue orbs softened just a bit and you watched as what seemed to be a million thoughts ran through his head. You reach up and caress the side of his face, your thumb gently stroking his cheekbone as well as the scar that graced his skin. “Look at me.”

The furrow in his brow faded away as his hands left the counter, his body fully turning to face yours. “Y/n,” he whispered, his hand reaching up to wrap around your wrist as he leaned into your touch.

You let out a quiet hum to let him know that was really you and that you were here, with him. “I’m so sorry,” you say quietly, your thumb continuing to stroke his face while his stroked the skin of your wrist.

His eyes were still glossy and his whole being still seemed as if it was far away. Your other hand grasped his shoulder as you stepped closer, trying to think of what to do to get him to fully come back.

A delirious grin formed on his lips as he looked at you, still not believing you were actually there. “I missed you,” he murmured, his eyes flickering all over your face before he began to turn back towards the mirror.

You placed both your hands on his face and pulled him away from whatever trance the mirror held over him. Tugging his head down, you press your forehead against his. “I’m here,” you whisper, reaching one hand down to grab his and place it on your waist. “I’m here and I’m so sorry.”

Anakin furrowed his brows again, his head shaking as his gloved hand tightened its grip on you. “It’s not…you’re not-”

“I am,” you cut him off, squeezing your eyes shut tightly as if it’ll help stop the love of your life from turning on everything he had going for him. You weren’t sure what to do at this point. Anakin was in denial, seemingly stuck in a very fragile state and balancing on a very thin edge of becoming something he swore he wouldn’t. A tear slips down your face as you brush your nose against his, an act you’ve done too many times to count. “Please….come back to me.”

Whatever had a hold on his mind seemed to let go as you said the words he had been craving to hear, the same ones you murmured to him in the first and only dream he had about you since you left - the same ones he said to you.

He pulled back just slightly, his eyes staring into yours as his face relaxed for the first time in nearly a month. His lip quivered and his eyes filled with unshed tears, his hand that wasn’t on your waist coming up to grip the back of your neck as he pulled you into him.

You wrapped your arms around him as your face pressed against his chest, a sigh of relief and desperation leaving both of you.

“Angel,” the name falls easily from his lips, his arms tightening around you as if you would disappear at any given second - and he’d be alone again. “You’ve come back to me.”

“I never should have left you,” you say back, your voice muffled due to the sobs you were holding back. “I’m so sorry, Anakin. Please, forgive me.”

His hand slides upwards to cradle the back of your head as he quietly hushes you. “It’s okay, my love,” he says quietly, his mind becoming foggy at the fact that he had you back in his arms. “You’re okay.” He presses his lips to the side of your head, his hand refraining from pulling you back in when he feels you push against him.

“I’m not,” you shake your head, your hands fisting his shirt. “I haven’t been. I feel so bad, Anakin. I hate that I hurt you. The guilt has been eating me alive, I’m so sorry for everything I put you through.”

Your sweet voice was music to his ears and he brought his hand around to the front of your head, where his thumb brushes away your tears as he quiets you once more. “It’s alright, angel,” he says, pulling you close once again. “We’ve found each other again, there’s nothing to be sorry for. We’re okay.”

Before you could nod in agreement, his lips pressed to yours in a gentle yet firm kiss. The action made his own tears fall as he closed his eyes, begging to anyone listening that you’d still be there when he opened them again. “I love you,” you mumbled when you pulled away, your forehead resting against his cheek. “So much.”

“I love you,” he says in return, holding you close and inhaling the scent that only belonged to you - the scent that made him dizzy. “Take me back.” Let me live again.

You nod quickly, leaning up to kiss him again. “It’s you and me,” you say against his mouth, feeling the way his arms wrapped protectively around your middle.

“You and me,” he agreed, kissing you once again. Forever.

Part 3

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stars4anakin · 6 months

Text

do not avenge me. —⁠ ANAKIN SKYWALKER

summary: when he held your dying body in his arms, you begged him of one thing, do not avenge me.

warnings: major character death, angst, (kind of) secret relationship coming out..haha

pairings: Anakin Skywalker x Gn!Reader

drabble ... MASTERLIST

You felt it coming, you felt his presence. It was dark, he was gone too far.

Maybe if you payed more attention to your own safety rather than Anakin's you wouldn't be on the floor, your head resting in the lap of your husband, tears streaming down your cheeks. God, why were you crying? You were not supposed to be weak.

Your attempt to move only prompted another cry from you, Anakin held you tightly, and his words barely reached you, He was yelling, but the words were distant and fragmented. He was crying, and you desperately wished he wouldn't.

"Stop crying, I'm okay-" you managed to whisper, but it only led him to hush you gently. His voice, despite the pain, was a nice sound, his voice made the pain go away, but you felt it, you were weak but his darkness was not. He felt cold, you felt the anger, the fear he's going to cause in the galaxy. You needed to get up, to reassure him that you were fine, but you couldn't, the pain persisted, relentless, excruciating. god did it hurt.

You turned your head to Obi-Wan, who had a knowing expression. The look he gave you spoke volumes, telling you what you already feared. You were fading away, you're dying.

Turning back to Anakin, you saw tears still streaming down his face. His hand slipped under your back, drawing you closer to his chest, his sobs growing louder, and you realized you couldn't escape the deafening sound. No, it wasn't leaving; it was intensifying, and it felt like it would never end.

"Ani," you choked, "Promise me, do not…" The pain was overwhelming, making it difficult to speak. "Do not avenge me."

There was no verbal response, just a gut-wrenching cry and his hand gripping yours even tighter. You continued, your voice weak, "You are good. Do not let me—don't let take that away from you."

Perhaps that was the moment he truly understood. You knew you were slipping away, but the transition was painless. What hurt more was hearing the distant screams of Anakin, his desperate pleas as you left your Anakin behind, forever.

a/n: djsfkjasenkdjfnjsakdfn Sorry I needed a cry!!

#꒰ ੭ 𓈒 ⊹ evana writes #star wars #sw anakin #anakin skywalker #anakin x reader #darth vader #anakin fanfiction #anakin skywalker x you #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin skywalker angst #star wars angst #angst #obi wan kenobi #palpatine #count dooku #obi wan and anakin #obi wan x reader

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antxlss · 7 months

Text

i’ll make it all better

pairing: anakin skywalker x fem!reader

summary: anakin helps you feel better during your period.

warnings: a little bit of pervy anakin, suggestive comments

words: 1.8k

a/n: this is just my interpretation of how anakin would act while you were on you period. lmk how you like it! requests are open! much love! ~max<3

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You were laying in bed. Specifically your boyfriend, Anakin's, bed. You were done with your training for today and you were worn out. Not to mention you started having signs your period was going to start. You checked your tracker and it said it would start in 3 days. It wasn't unusual for you to start cramping early.

You came back to Anakin's quarters and curled up in a ball, just waiting for him to get back, it should be very soon.

Anakin walks into the room wearing only boxers. "Are you okay, are you cramping?" He lays down next to you and wraps his arms around you. This is a man known to be a cold and calculating warrior, but he is nothing but a big softy around you.

You roll your head over to look at him.

"How do you always know." You smile.

"Well the first sign is you being all cuddled up in a blanket. You only do that when you're either sick or on your period."

He chuckles as he gently lays his head down on your shoulder and holds your hand.

"You'll get better if you just rest, so how about I just lay with you and we can watch holovids and stuff. We don't usually get any down time on missions so we might as well make the most of this opportunity, right?"

"Yeah, I'd love that." You nod sleepily. "I'm gonna go grab a water real quick."

You roll out of bed and go to the kitchen, unknowingly leveling a red splotch of blood where you had once been sitting, in Anakin's white sheets.

Anakin is sitting up in the bed, completely oblivious to the spot of blood on the sheets. He notices you walk out of the bedroom and calls out to you.

"Hey babe, will you get me a glass of water too while you're at it please?"

"Of course, honey!" You yell back.

You quickly get the two glasses of water and walk back into the bedroom. To your horror, you notice a blood stain on the bed.

You had bled through your shorts.

You walk back into the room and hand Anakin his water while desperately trying to avoid any eye contact to the stain on the bed as you set down his water.

He gives you a smile, then picks up the glass of water and sits up in the bed. As you sit on the edge of the bed, Anakin wraps his hands around your sides and kisses the side of your forehead.

He wraps his arms around you and pulls you in close, then whispers to you. "Can we cuddle?"

"Ani, I think I started my period." Your face was crimson red. You immediately stood up. "I'll try my best to get the stain out, I'm so sorry. My period wasn't supposed to start for a few more days so I didn't have a tampon in-"

Anakin smiles at you gently as you start to get up.

"Babe, just calm down. It's just a little blood, don't worry about the sheets, they're white, we'll just throw them in the wash and they'll come out cleaner."

His arms remain wrapped around your body, not letting you leave just yet.

"There's really no need to feel ashamed. Your body does what it wants to do, there's nothing shameful about a normal bodily function." He brushes his fingers over your hair.

"I love you." You whispered as you stared in to his eyes.

You were sure if he were just any other man, he would've flipped out about you possibly ruining his sheets. But he's Anakin.

Anakin leans in close and his lips graze your ear as he whispers. "I love you too."

He pulls you close again to the point where you're straddling him. He looks into your eyes.

"There's nothing you could do that would make me love you any less. We'll throw the sheets in the wash shortly and no one will be the wiser. But right now, I just want to hold you and be with you."

"I'm gonna go put on a pad, okay?" You ask.

Anakin nods.

He pulls a hand away and grabs your thigh. He caresses your thigh and whispers.

"If you want me to, I can put it on for you."

His voice is smooth but his stare is sharp. He is waiting for you to decide.

You laugh at him.

"Why would you want to do that?"

Anakin grins and responds with a wink.

"I'm your boyfriend. I should help you with things like that."

"I can't just let you struggle all by yourself now, can I? And if it's an embarrassing situation, I should be there for you."

"I already know you just want to feel me up." You smirk at him.

Anakin's grin gets wider.

"Okay yes, guilty as charged, but that still doesn't change any of what I said."

He then caresses your thigh one more and then lets go of your thigh.

"You ready to get your pad on now?"

"Yeah." You giggle at his boyish comments and walk to the bathroom.

Anakin lies back down on his bed and stares at the ceiling. He then rolls his neck and stretches out his arms and legs, getting comfortable.

After a few minutes you walk out of the bathroom holding up your pad.

Anakin smiles at you and holds out his hand.

"Hey, come over here, let me put it on for you."

You walk over to him and place the package in his hand. "Let's see if you can even figure this out."

Anakin sits up in the bed, his hands hold the pad. He looks down at it, and then up at you with a smug grin and a gleam in his eyes.

"Oh yeah don't worry, it's not going to take me long to figure out."

He glances at the package again, then opens it, taking the pad out of the package.

"If I figure it out, what do I get?"

A light glint in his eyes as he talks.

"Just figure it out first, Skywalker." You snap back with a smug grin.

Anakin rolls his eyes at you playfully and pulls you towards him, still holding the pad in his hand.

"What if I pull you close and put the pad on you in a different way than you expect?"

He chuckles slightly.

"You see, I might be willing to trade places with the pad right now."

"One, that's disgusting. Two, of course you are the one that could make putting on a pad sexual." You laugh.

Anakin grins at you and wraps his arms around your body, pulling you closer so that you are sitting on top his legs.

"What can I say, I'm your boyfriend, you should expect me to be a little perverted."

He brushes some of your hair out of your face and rests his fingers on your cheek. He stares into your eyes and caresses your cheek. His smile is mischievous but caring and full of love.

"Hurry up and put the pad on before I bleed all over your lap." You hand him the fresh pair of underwear to stick the pad onto.

Anakin looks down at the pad in his hands and then back up at you.

"You're right, let's just make this easier for both of us."

He places the pad on the underwear you gave him, then stands up holding the underwear. He walks towards you and slides the underwear under your butt.

"That was easier, just sit back down, okay?"

You obey him and sit back on his lap with your fresh underwear and pad.

Anakin holds you on his lap while adjusting the pad in place. He presses a hand to your thigh.

"How's that feel?"

He then leans forward and presses his lips onto your neck, kissing it gently.

"Better now that our little 'incident' is taken care of, right?"

"Yeah. Other than my stomach, back, thighs, head, and breasts. They still cramp." You laugh and lay your head on his shoulder.

Anakin laughs a bit, and caresses your hair.

"Your body must be really getting the better of you. Maybe I could give you a massage? It'll help you relax your muscles and make you feel a lot better."

"Mmm, that sounds good." You slide off Anakin's lap and slip off your sweatshirt, leaving you in just you bra and underwear so he could access your body better.

Anakin grabs your arm and gently pushes you back onto his lap.

"No, I'd like you better like this," he says with a coy smile. "Now you can sit here nice and comfortable and I'll take care of everything."

He wraps his arms around your body and pulls you close. And then he starts to slowly massage your back. He works carefully at your cramped muscles, rubbing them in circular motions to relieve the tightness in your back.

He whispers into your ear. "Do I need to take your bra off?"

"Do whatever you need to, you're the professional at massages." You smile and lay on your stomach on the bed.

"Well, I'm also a professional in more ways than just that."

Anakin's fingers continue to work at the knots in the muscles of your back, massaging them into submission.

Your skin feels tingly and sensitive as his fingers glide over it and he works at your back.

"Relax, okay? Don't worry about anything," Anakin whispers softly to you.

"How can I relax when your hands are all over me." You groan.

Anakin continues rubbing his fingers against the tension and soreness in your back, kneading the muscles and getting deep into the muscles of your back.

As you continue to groan, Anakin continues to talk to you.

"Well, just remember that these hands are the hands of the man that you love. There's no one else that knows your body better than me, so just relax and I'll make it all better alright?"

You could've audibly moaned at those words. Anakin's hands moved all over you, releasing the pressure of your cramping muscles. You couldn't help but sigh with content.

Anakin worked tirelessly to get rid of the cramps and soreness you have in your muscles. As you sigh with content, Anakin smiles and continues to massage you.

"That feels better for you, right?" Anakin continues to talk to you, gently caressings your back.

The room is silent besides for the rustling of his fingers on your body. The only other thing heard is your heavy breathing, and Anakin whispers to you.

"Shh, relax now. That's it. Let go. Trust me."

You could feel yourself getting sleepy. Your body was so relaxed and so was your mind. You were in a daze. All your senses flooded with him. With Anakin. You had king forgotten about your dreaded period.

#anakin skywalker smut #anakin skywalker x you #anakin skywalker #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin x reader #star wars anakin #anakin x you #anakin smut #sw anakin #anakin skywalker imagine #anakin fanfiction #anakin skywalker angst #anakin skywalker drabble #anakin skywalker x reader smut #anakin skywalker x female reader

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themandaloriansdiaries · 1 year

Text

Sorry Not Sorry

Warnings: Minors dni!! fingering, slight name calling (nothing super harsh) (oral, f receiving) slight choking, hair pulling. dirty talk. p in v, unprotected rough sex. (don't be silly, wrap that willy) smut, smut, smut!! and some fluff towards the end

Pairings: Anakin Skywalker x F reader

A/N: I really love the way this came out. It literally took forever because I wanted it to be perfect!! shoutout to my bestie for helping on some parts. n e ways, I hope you all love it as much as I do :))))

Word Count: 2.1k

While you and Anakin were both out on a mission, you had the urge to be a bit devious; payback one would call it. He had been getting on your nerves during the flight home seeing that he was frustrated about the mission not going the way he wanted it to.

You figured why not make his day as miserable as he’s made yours?

It truly wouldn't be that hard to make him even more frustrated, something as simple as disobeying him in front of the others would set him off. You smirked at the thought of that. You knew by doing so, you'd deal with the consequences later.. in the bedroom.

Later on that day, Anakin had asked you to do something and with no hesitation, you simply said no. This took him by surprise, only because he's never experienced this kind of attitude from you.

“Excuse me? Did I hear you correctly?" He asked, his tone low.

You looked at him with a smug expression on your face. “You heard me correctly, I said no." This caused you to receive a look from him. You paid no attention to him and continued on with what you were doing. As you sat quietly, wishing the ride home would go by faster.

What you hadn’t noticed was Anakin had sat next to you and moved closer to you at some point. He was so close to you that you could feel his lips brush against your earlobe. “Once we land I want you to meet me in my room.” He whispered in your ear, causing chills to go down your spine.

As you landed, you quickly got up from your seat and made your way to your quarters. You already knew what was going to happen once you got into Anakin's room, so you figured you would freshen up. A quick shower to wash up when you stepped out of the shower, you decided to spray his favorite perfume.

Anytime you wear that scent, it drove him nuts.

Wrapping your robe around your body, you made your way down to his bedroom. You enter the room and before you could even call out to him ,you feel yourself being pushed up against the wall. A gasp slips from your lips at the sudden contact of your back against the cold wall. A chuckle came from the corner of the room, causing you to look in the direction of the noise. It wasn’t a big shocker to see him slowly walk out into the light.

“You didn't think I forgot about what you did earlier did you?" He's closer now, his face inches away from yours. You look up at him, deciding to play along.

“What did I do?" you ask innocently, batting your lashes in hopes of getting away with it.

His hands find their way towards your body, his grip tight on your hips. “Oh please y/n, don't play dumb,” his lips against your neck as he speaks.

He’s able to take in your scent, causing him to groan. “You know what that perfume does to me.” He loves the way that perfume scent mixes in with your skin.

Hearing him fold just from that makes you smirk. “I know how much you love it, that’s why I wore it”

His hands move their way up to your breasts and he grips them, caressing them roughly. It doesn't even hurt, if anything it feels too good.

You moan softly as his hands toy with your breasts. "oh Ani-" you're cut off by him.

“It’s master to you" He says, one hand making his way to grip your neck while his other hand continues to caress your other breast. Despite your eyes being closed enjoying the attention you are receiving from him, you could feel his eyes fixed on you; watching your every move, waiting to see how you’d react.

Anakin knew the moment he got you in the room, you’d cave; you always did. You were putty in his hands and you both knew it.

you're not sure what turned you on more.. the tight grip he had on your neck or the fact that you knew that soon you'd be on all fours getting fucked senselessly by him.

you were truly such a whore for him and he knew it too. always loving his roughness with you, letting him have his way with you. He loved it. He loved seeing the way you would crumble under him, how weak he could make you just by his touch.

"You think you're slick. disobeying me in front of the others. trying to make me look like some bitch?" he said, you could hear a small hint of anger in his voice. He pushed himself up against you. you felt yourself getting wetter by the minute. the feeling of his hard cock brushing against your aching core, the feeling drove you insane.

you wanted nothing more than to feel him deep inside of you already.

"I'm sorry Master" you struggled to get your words out, distracted by him. truthfully, you weren't actually sorry. You only said it because you knew that's exactly what he wanted to hear from you. He smirked at the sound of your voice, you sounded so small to him, so fragile. He loved the affect he had on you.

soon he would be breaking you apart.

“Strip.” He's watching you like a hawk, as you take each piece of clothing you have on, off.

he takes a few steps back from you. "Get on the bed, now" you do as you're told but instead of actually getting on the bed you decide to stand in front of it.

"I said get on the bed" he’s right in front of you now. His eyes are darker. He pushes you down roughly onto the bed. All you can do in that moment is look up at him.

He’s now towering over you, he uses his flesh hand to roughly spread open your legs.; his fingers run along your wet slit, spreading your folds, exposing your juices to him. “Look at how wet you are for me” he smirks.

His fingers apply pressure to your clit. He's moving them in a circular motion, painfully slow.

Your eyes are shut; you’re bottom lip in between your teeth while you try to keep in your moans. You don’t want to give him the satisfaction but you’ve failed.

Pushing yourself against his hand “p-please Master.”

“What is it y/n, spit it out.” He’s amused with how much of an affect he has on you.

“I need more. Please” you manage to get out between your whimpers.

He grows harder at the sight of you; the way you’re falling apart just by his touch, the way you sound, those small noises that are escaping your lips.

As much as he doesn’t want to give in to you. He can’t wait any longer. Just as you’re aching for him, he’s aching for you too.

He thinks about the way your walls stretch around his length. The way he fills you up so perfectly.

“Fuck this.” He gives in; his head is now in between your thighs. He doesn’t waste anymore time. His tongue laps at your swollen clit, he’s now slipped two fingers in you, fucking you with them.

Your back is now arched, your head thrown back. All you can do is moan. Your hands resting on the back of his head, pushing him further into you. “Oh f-fuck, fuck, you make me feel so good Master” you cry out through gritted teeth.

He groans against you, continuing on with what he’s doing. He feels your walls tighten around his fingers, he knows what that means. You’re close. He stops. Pulling his fingers out, moving his head. Instead of you cumming on his fingers.. he wants you to cum all over his cock.

You whimper at the sudden loss of his touch.; you stare at him with a pout now on your lips. “That wasn’t nice”

“Does it look like I care? I want you on all fours. Now." you do as you're told and reposition yourself; now your face pressed against the pillows and your ass high up in the air. He stares at your body, almost creaming his pants at the sight of you.

You wait eagerly, you’re so ready to be filled up and used by your Master.

He quickly undresses himself; he’s now positioned behind you. His hand grips your hip tightly, while the other grabs ahold of his cock and lines himself up at your entrance.

Before slipping into you; he’s teasing you by running the tip of his cock up and down your slit, spreading the wetness that you and him both created.

You being impatient, you try to push yourself against him. Earning a slap to your ass. “Be patient, whore.”

You moan at his words.

Before you know it, he slides into you, slowly, making sure you feel every inch of him as he fills you up. He watches as his cock disappears. Moaning at the feeling of your walls stretching around him. Without any hesitation, he pulls out and thrusts back into you roughly.; fucking you like the dirty little whore you are.

The room is filled with the sounds of your skin slapping against one another. Your moans and his groans.

You move your hips; thrusting back into him. This new action from you drives him crazy, causing him to thrust even harder.

“You feel so good inside of me, Master! Please don't stop .” You practically scream out.

“F-fuck y/n. I won’t! I’m gonna keep fucking you like the little whore you are.” his eyes are shut, moaning loudly, his hips drilling into yours.

His movements remain at the same pace as before, his hand still tightly gripping your hip.

Moans escaping you both.

You shove your face in the pillow in an attempt to quiet your moans.

Anakin notices; wrapping your hair around his free hand, he pulls your head back from the pillows. “Don't hide your sounds, I want them all to hear how good I make you feel." He meant every word. He really did not care if anyone heard you both. He wanted the others to hear you, to know that you are his.

You belonged to him.

“More,” you call, begging for him to give you more. Anakin could never say no to you. His hand slid down the curve of your spine, resting between your shoulder blades. Quickly moving his arm around you. He pulls you up, your back against his chest. His hand finds its way to your throat, gripping it.

It was needy and messy; feeling you around him drove him mad, hearing you ask him for more was the cherry on top.

"This is what you wanted, wasn't it?" Anakin asks, your little hand wrapping around his wrist. You nod, unable to verbally answer him.

"Good girl."

Your moans continue to echo throughout the room. finally you reach down to apply pressure to your clit; rubbing aggressively, this and his harsh thrusts throw you over the edge. your head thrown back, eyes rolled back. "I'm gonna cum.” You cry out.

“Cum for me, cum all over my cock baby." His thrusts become sloppier, indicating he's close as well.

"I'm cumming, gonna fill you up." he groans loudly, filling you up with his seed.

Small whimpers escape your lips, your body trembling from the intense orgasm you just experienced.

He gives you a minute before pulling out, and you feel him get off the bed but you aren’t sure where he went. You’re much too tired and to be frank, fucked out, to even care at that point.

The water is running and you can hear footsteps. Anakin comes back, crouching down by the bed. He rubs your back softly and you look over at him.

“C’mon,” he says, his hand stretched out for you as he helped you sit up.

Anakin wraps your robe around you before helping you stand, legs like jello as he slowly walks you towards the bathroom.

The tub is full and there’s bubbles peeking over the ledge.

You can’t help the giggle as you glance over at him, “you ran me a bath?”

“it was the least I could do,” he smiles, kissing your temple as he walks you to the tub.

He takes the robe from you, his hand in yours as you step into the tub, a satisfied hum when you sink into the warm water. Anakin’s crouched down by the tub now, his arm hanging in the tub as you look at him. Your hand comes up to cup his cheek.

“I love you, you know that, right?” You tell him, “no matter what.”

Anakin smiles, turning to press a kiss to your palm.

“I love you.”

#anakin skywalker smut #anakin skywalker #anakin x reader #anakin x y/n #anakin skywalker fluff #anakin skywalker angst #anakin fanfiction #anakin skywalker fanfiction #anakin skywalker fic #star wars fanfiction #star wars smut #star wars fan fiction #darth vader #darth vader fanfiction #darth vader smut #Darth vader fluff #star wars fluff #star wars angst

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saintmurd0ck · 7 months

Text

lakeside dreamin'

masterlist

pairing: jedi general anakin skywalker x f!reader

summary: anakin reminisces about your lives together while he's away fighting in the clone wars

warnings: heavy angst, mentions of canon events in TCW, canon typical mentions of warfare, some smut/spice, mentions of sex, minors DNI 18+ only

a/n: to the one anon who requested this maybe a year ago? i saw clone wars anakin and it was over for my brain 🫠 anyway love you guys and leave a comment or reblog if you liked this! 🥺

song pairing: love on the brain (rihanna)

The war was taking its toll.

Day after day, planet after planet, all Anakin knew now was his place on the battlefield. And his role in leading the victory for the Jedi and the Republic, even though their dogma preached peace, not violence. Every skirmish brought a new kind of horror to his once uncomplicated life, whether it was watching Separatist droids and clone troopers alike, cut down as easily as marsh reeds, or the simple fact that his relationship with the Force was dwindling towards something impure. Something he couldn’t make sense of, and would surely raise more questions than answers if he were to confide in his Masters. It wasn’t that he contemplated reaching towards the Dark side, or thought of the kind of evil only the Sith could endure; it was more like an isolating numbness that spread from within, and before long, Anakin felt the cloud settle over his mind.

He was tired of seeing smoke — the kind that billowed in every direction, stinking of despair and lost hope on his front, despite the war turning to the Republic’s favour. It was the sound of unending blaster fire and the repetitive ignition of his lightsaber that haunted his nightmares, and with only the company of his clone legion, his Padawan Ahsoka and the occasional appearance from Obi-Wan, he felt himself starting to slip.

He was overwhelmed, and encumbered with burden.

Never before had he experienced such guilt, anger and suffering — towards his army, towards the civilians caught in the crossfire, and towards his relationship with you.

The secret life the two of you led, away from the Order, felt like something out of another galaxy, another lifetime. It was as if eons had passed since he’d last seen you, and yet the world was constantly evolving — not towards freedom, but into a more destructive version of its past. Even for a Jedi General (and, one could argue, because he was a Jedi General), Anakin had little comfort, and much less sway in which systems he visited and what he took part in. Seeing you was absolutely out of the question, but it wasn’t like he bothered to even ask, out of fear of inviting a lecture from Obi-Wan, or Maker-forbid, an audience with Master Yoda.

At least things like facilitating training for the Onderon rebels allowed him to feel more of himself, and to an extent, a sort of unity with the Council, but all of that was quickly replaced by the more sinister side of the Separatist Alliance, such as the trainwreck on Zygerria. Liberation didn’t exist there. Not until Anakin showed up.

It was these events that really compelled him to look inwards, to not just seek the Force’s guidance, but to use it in tandem with a coping mechanism that would get him through the war.

And so the vignettes began. Slowly, at first.

It started off as little glimpses of your life together, slices of euphoric nostalgia that weaved their way into Anakin’s being. He didn’t realise just how much he yearned for you; not simply the way your skin felt on his, but the pureness of your energy, the reminder that good truly did exist in this world. As much as these images were a solace to his sanity, they brought about a sense of malaise. Contrition, actually, if he sought the Force for the purpose of clarity. Even though it all existed in his head, allowing himself these indulgences felt like once again, he was breaking Code.

But could it really have been that bad, if it honed his focus? If it drew him back to the bigger picture, of the why? Reminding himself of who it was he fought for didn’t erase the atrocities, but it gave him that flicker of hope, knowing that the sum of his actions equalled a better world for you.

And some selfish, miniscule part of him figured that if he could lead the victory, he’d be pardoned when the Order inevitably found out about the life the two of you shared. It isn’t as if no-one already knew. He was sure Ahsoka was aware. Rex, too. He doubted when it came to Obi-Wan, but then again very little got past his Master.

While the memories of you lay fresh before his eyes, they seemed to sharpen at specific points throughout the day; often in the thick of battle, or when he woke up in the middle of the night, drenched in a cold sweat, nothing but thin shafts of moonlight illuminating his body. It’s like they were stitched perfectly amongst the real action, scattered at perfect intervals that jerked his body into manoeuvre.

The sweetest images had always featured the lake.

Armed with nothing more but his wits, his back pressed against the cold, wet stone in a cave on Vanqor, he reminisced about that first night with you by the lakeside. The sweet smell of wildflowers carried in the breeze, heightened by his affinity for the Force. He recalled the gentle lapping of the waves on the shore, and how the two moons cast their milky glow upon the shimmering surface of the water. And you — radiant, almost ethereal in the soft light, and the way your lips brushed against his neck, filling him with the kind of heat that flooded all at once. Not even the screech of the pursuing gundark could have interrupted this moment in time. He felt his breathing go ragged, because he remembered what happened next. He gritted his teeth, thinking about the way he moved inside you, and how you tangled your fingers in his hair, pressing chaste kisses to his mouth, his chest, whispering his name in sinful bliss. The gundark didn’t stand a chance. Not when Anakin’s motivation for getting out alive laid in sweet promise, embedded in these visions.

His name felt the most natural rolling off your tongue, nevermind that that was truly the last real thing he possessed, unmarred by time and the influence of the Jedi. In that moment, when you’d taken him over the edge with you, crying his name so loud he swore someone had heard, he knew he’d give it over to you if you’d asked.

He thought of the lake again when he was in Felucia, crouched low amongst the sillum. His lightsaber grew heavy in his hand, the ridges suddenly awkward in his palm, but the grip he’d started to lose on his lifeline gave rise to something he couldn’t ignore.

It was another temperate day and the sun had created the most brilliant reflections on the surface of the lake. With the grasses and trees swaying in the wind, Anakin closed his eyes, reaching out with the Force. He didn’t prod or poke, but rather he cast a wide net, a delicate caress, to connect with the life that teemed. It sang to him in a multi-layered harmony, acting as a prominent reminder that the Force flowed in all living things. And when his eyes fluttered open, he watched you carefully as you walked towards the water, your feet crunching on the smooth pebbles that made up the beach. You turned around to give him a dazzling smile, moving with deliberation to slip off your clothes. Your laughter echoed in the crisp air as you dived into the lake, disappearing under a swathe of emerald green, only to resurface in the middle with a large grin plastered to your face. He didn’t hesitate to jump in, to shed his clothing on the spot. A shudder ran down his spine at the thought of what happened shortly after.

Sometimes it was hard to return to the present, to remember that he’d sleep alone that night while you were only just waking up, systems away, most likely after another fitful slumber. There were times where he thought these visions would serve no other purpose than to derail him, when the temptation of your touch shadowed his desire for victory. These moments guided him to channel the Force within, so as to remind himself of why he was doing this in the first place. Because it was more than just a coping mechanism. It was an anchor. A thrumming pulse point. A gentle acknowledgement of the life he wanted to come back to.

It’s then that he wondered when enough would be enough, when the war would come to a stalemate, as it so often did in their history. The tide was turning, and he knew it.

And there it was again, that kernel of hope, that ember of light that shone in the depths of his soul. Even reduced to a ghost in his memory, you were tangible, so tangible now. He wouldn’t let the Separatists win. He couldn’t, because there was too much at stake. And so if thinking of you, in these ways, helped him remember that, he wasn’t going to stop.

Not for anyone.

#anakin skywalker smut #anakin skywalker angst #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin skywalker fanfiction #anakin skywalker fic #star wars smut #star wars fanfiction #the clone wars fanfiction #anakin x reader #anakin smut #anakin fanfiction #x reader #rhi writes 💻

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anakin-skywalker-always · 7 months

Note

Fluffy 🌸 with Clone Wars Anakin please? 🥺🥺 with maybe Ahsoka and Obi-Wan shipping them?

The Long Game

Pairing: Clone Wars Era!Anakin x Jedi!Knight Reader

Requested: Yes | No

Warnings: Nothing too bad, but due to the nature of the Clone Wars obviously there is potential mentions of death/loss/wounds etc. I am Australian and therefore swear words aren’t worth a warning for me, but I shall place a warning here regardless. As always, let me know if you think there should be something listed here.

Words: 1.5k - sorry its very short, I'm hoping a part 2 will be requested <3

Author’s Notes: ahhhhh! Thank you for the request @darthgloris I hope this is okay I had a brief idea and I ran with it, hope its still fluffy enough for you! 🥰 This was requested via my Emoji Request Prompts

Anakin was nothing if not arrogant, egotistical and, surprisingly talented to boot. As a youngling he excelled, as a Padawan learner he saved Senator and friend Padmé Amidala’s life more than once. Now, as General Skywalker, Anakin felt like he had grown into himself, grown into his power. It felt limitless, he was limitless. Anakin often had dreams of spreading himself thin, extending his power across the galaxy like a blanket, keeping everyone and everything safe.

He thought highly of himself, it wasn’t a secret. And, he didn’t think it was particularly a problem. He was the Chosen One, was he not? If anyone in the Jedi Temple was allowed to peacock a bit, it was him.

Well, that’s how Anakin rationalised it to himself anyway. Besides, Anakin did not like playing the long game. What was the point when he could sieze everything he wanted now?

Regardless, he had a sharp learning curve when it came to his own Padawan learner, Ashoka Tano. The snippy young girl challenged him more than most. He saw so much of himself in her, the power, the strength, the raw talent. Frustratingly, Anakin saw his faults in her too. Occasionally, the arrogance being something that Anakin couldn’t ignore. Like right now for example.

“Please Kestis the only reason you were moved from youngling to Padawan,” Ashoka paused, pointing her spoon at her young red-headed friend. “Is because the council wanted to try and mellow out your Master with the responsibility of a child.”

Anakin cringed as the young boy - Cal Kestis - pouted at the breakfast table. Anakin could sense Obi-wan’s displeasure from beside him, he saw his old master holding his tongue, allowing Anakin to take the floor in order to berate his Padawan.

Unfortunately, she had a point. And, embarrassingly enough, Ashoka’s argument came straight from the kitchen, so they say. Well, his mother, Shmi, used to say. Anakin remembered expressing the same frustration only a few weeks prior. Jedi Knight, Jedi Master, Council member and friend, Y/N L/N, was unable to join Anakin and Ashoka on a crucial mission in the outer rim, due to the passover of her new, young apprentice: Cal Kestis. It perhaps wasn’t the most fair or patient thing for Anakin to do, but he blamed the boy and focused all of his frustration on the twelve-year-old.

Fuck it, Anakin thought. He had to admit to himself, he was a little jealous of the boy. He could not help but want to be the center of your attention, at all times. Which isn’t a very Jedi thing to want. But Anakin wanted more. He always did. He always felt distracted, like he was slipping away from his mental fortitude the more he thought of you. You were playing some kind of long game with him, and he didn’t like it, the guessing, the pining - it all kept him up at night more than the war had.

Anakin supposed he was ought to be worried about it, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care. He pined after you, and all he wanted was for you to maybe, even consider him more than a work colleague.

“Ahsoka.” Anakin said sternly, as he pushed his Jedi mandated food around his Jedi mandated plate with his Jedi mandated fork, not bothering to look up at his young charge. “Watch your snippy mouth.”

“She’s not wrong, Master.” Meekly, Cal Kestis mirrored General Skywalker across the table. Anakin felt for the young boy then. Anakin looked up, finally taking in the boy. With his fiery hair and splattering of freckles across his face, he seemed inherently sad, with his lips held tight in a line. Anakin couldn’t help but remember the same expression on his own face as he made his way around Watto’s junkyard.

“Do you not like your Master, young Kestis?” Obi-wan sensed Anakin’s mind was far, far away, the anxiety rolling off him in thick waves.

Cal looked up, quickly, at the two Jedi knights in front of him. He felt like he was in shock, as if the air had been torn from his lungs. Of all the questions he expected to be asked, that was not one of them.

“No!” Cal defended, adamantly. “No! Well yes!” The young Padawan could feel the heat rise to his pale face, heating the back of his neck. General Kenobi quirked an eyebrow at the boy, urging him to continue. Kestis sighed, gathering his thoughts once more. He was embarrassed. “I am afraid I am too attached to Master L/N.” He started. Anakin felt his lip twitch, fighting a smile at the honesty from the young learner. Cal continued, “I don’t want to let her down, but my lightsaber skills are not where she wants them to be, I need more training but I am afraid to ask.”

From the corner of his eye Anakin watched as Obi-wan opened his mouth. He knew what his old master would say: Just ask, Padawan. That is what the master is there for, to teach. But Anakin knew what it felt like to want more.

“I would be happy to provide you with additional combat training, Padawan Cal Kestis.” Anakin leant back in his chair, both hands happily resting behind his head, left ankle at home on his right knee, lips comfortably in a smirk.

Long game it was.

Your eyes scanned the meals room in the Temple for your Padawan learner. You knew that you could use the force to locate him, if you wanted. But, your relationship with Cal was still so new, and somehow that felt like encroaching on the young boy’s privacy.

Besides, there was another presence in the large dining hall that almost overwhelmed you. Anakin Skywalker.

Arrogant, talented, intelligent, calculated, The Chosen One, handsome, flirtatious. You weren’t sure where you stood with Anakin. You longed to call him friend, but you were ultimately convinced he saw you little more as a colleague.

Despite all that though, he was a hard man to escape at the best of times. And now, since Cal and Anakin’s Padwan, Ahsoka Tano, were friends, you knew that Anakin would always be around.

You couldn’t help the schoolgirl flutter that it striked into you. It was exciting, you supposed, to finally have something a bit easy on the eye about constantly. It certainly made the war a little easier, to do missions with Jedi Knight Anakin Skywalker.

Eventually, Cal’s beautiful bright hair shone like a beacon for you. You began to weave your way across the room. You couldn’t help to admit that you’ve become attached to him, you deeply cared for him, his wellbeing. As much as you loved the Jedi, you often thought of Cal playing, running free with kids his own age. Not becoming a soldier on the front lines of an intergalactic war. Perhaps that was why you slacked on Cal’s training. You simply wanted him to be loved, to be happy, to be a child.

All of the fondness you held so tightly quickly got packed away once you realised who Cal was sat with. Approaching the breakfast table you clocked Anakin’s relaxed figure. The effortlessly beautiful set of his lips, the way that his eyelashes curled upwards, you were convinced his demeanour was larger than life. And, maybe, perhaps, you let your eyes wander for a beat longer than what was socially acceptable.

Gently you placed your hand on Cal’s shoulder, perhaps it was because you were his Master, or maybe it was something deeper, something maternal, but you always felt more at ease when you had him close. With a slight bow of your head, you opened:

“Morning to you Master Kenobi, Ahsoka.” You took a moment to lick your lips, your whole mouth had gone dry, but you tried desperately to save yourself from Anakin’s piercing gaze. “General Skywalker.” The rest greeted you verbally, but Anakin said nothing, just a simple tilt of his head. You held Anakin’s gaze, his blue eyes held something else in them, you felt like he was playing some kind of game. You didn’t mind game, but only if you knew the rules, and Anakin was one to make up the play as he went along. You felt Cal clear his throat, his body lurching under your hand.

Finally, you broke the contact with Anakin, ruffiling Cal’s hair, and placing his braid behind his ear. “If you’d excusae us, my Padawan and I have much to do.”

Anakin waited for at least 30 seconds for you and your Padawan to start walking away before he turned in his chair to follow you out with his eyes.

Ahsoka watched as her usually oh-so-clever and suave and calculating Master watch Cal Kestis and his Master leave the dining hall like a Lothal Cat waiting for its owner to return. She couldn’t help but smile, Anakin’s pining was hilarious, and Master L/N was a good choice. She turned to share a look with Master Kenobi, and to Ahsoka’s delight he was chuckling softly to himself, coving his smile with his hand, playing it off as if he was simply stroking his beard.

Ahsoka knew Anakin thought he was playing some kind of long game, but it was going to be a painfully long pining. Not if she was going to have anything to do with it.

------

P.S This is a side account, my main is @mayhemories, so I will be answering any comments with that account but rest assured it is still me :) <3

Much love, El.

#anakin x reader #star wars #anakin skywalker #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin skywalker x reader smut #anakin smut #anakin x y/n #anakin skywalker angst #anakin skywalker fluff #star wars x reader #anakin skywalker smut #anakin skywalker x you #anakin x you #cal kestis #the clone wars #star wars the clone wars #anakin skywalker clone wars #general skywalker

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enviedear · 7 months

Text

is it real ⟶ anakin skywalker

description ⌙ it's easier to hate him than it is to be honest in how much you care for him, but anakin makes a mission of making hating him near impossible. pairing ⌙ anakin x fem!reader warnings ⌙ saber graze, tending to a wound, a petty argument, a little angst. word count ⌙ 2.8k

— request | masterlist

totally inspired by this masterpiece of a song that i can't get out of my head. it's so ani coded i had to indulge.

"there's a med-pack by the table." anakin's voice is soft, enough so to distract slightly from the searing pain emitting from the saber graze at your ribs.

"can you, fuck, help?" you barely make it to his bed before your knees give.

at your falter he rushes to you, eyes wide, "c'mere, let me see."

you don't fight him when he rips your tunics off, exposing the large gash at your ribcage. you take in a breath at the sight of it. far larger and worse than you had previously thought.

"obi-wan was right," he grabs for the med-pack before kneeling down to you, "you have to stop trying to fight all on your own."

you want to roll your eyes, you want to smack him upside the head. for as long as you've known the boy, he's had an annoying tendency of fretting over you, acting as though you were delicate.

when you were younger, it was easier for you to accept such behavior. but as the two of you grew, it became far harder to ignore the way his kindness caused your mind to drift toward something utterly wrong. friendship had since turned into acquaintanceship.

it was so much easier this way.

"says you, skywalker." your voice is gritty, watching his mechanic hand begin to clean the wound.

he ignores your irritation, "maybe if you'd let me help you—"

you interrupt him, eyes narrowed, "i'm letting you help right now, aren't i?"

his hand stills for a second before continuing its work, "you know what i mean."

you're not sure you do. in truth, there could be a million things he could mean. you rarely lean on your fellow jedi, especially not anakin. not when being around him makes your heart race faster than a speeder.

you try to avoid him as much as possible. you'd rather eat at a crowded table than with him at his empty one, rather fight a group of enemies alone than beside him, rather keep your thoughts locked away in your own head than divulge them to him.

for as great and divinely chosen as he was in others' eyes, he was a lingering distraction for you. his gaze is etched into your mind, and you find it frightening how much you draw up the vision.

if you're the means, he will always be your end.

"it's not that bad, i've seen you take worse." you try to steady your voice as you speak.

his non-dominant hand finds its way to your bent knee, sending a shock throughout your body, "doesn't mean you have to." you waver slightly at his words, zoning in on the way his lips quirk up at the sentiment.

rolling your eyes, you grab for the bandages and gauze, "i can do the rest myself."

he draws away from you but you can feel him watching you. you can tell he wants to say more— wants to press you further.

you try to ignore the way his presence affects you as you wrap your wound. it's easier that way, to brush him off. maker forbid you ever gave him the notion that you feel the way you do.

if he knew— he'd be on you like ants to honey, all-consuming. anakin was devotional, it was a flaw you enjoyed pointing out to him. you'd mock him for it, calling it the opposite of the jedi way. because it's easier to pick fun at the attribute than to imagine the way it would feel to be at the receiving end of such a trait.

it'd be sacred, surely.

you finish dressing the saber graze and hold tight to the fresh application before grabbing your tunics. it's a painful struggle to put them back on, and you wince at the stretch you have to do to pull them back over your head.

anakin, now leaning against his door, watches you in condemnation, "it wouldn't hurt so much if you just let me help you, y/n."

you make your way toward him, "i'm fine. now, can you let me leave."

he glowers at you, "no."

"what do you mean, no?" your eyes slim.

"i want you to be honest for once," he clenches his jaw before continuing, "i mean, i’m trying to help you, and you act like a brat. what's your problem?"

you stare at him, feeling frustration bubbling up inside you. he is so adept at getting under your skin and making you feel things that are far better left unexplored.

"my problem?" you scoff, crossing your arms over your chest. "my problem is that i'm sick and tired of being treated like a child by everyone around here. including you."

anakin's eyes widen in surprise for just a moment before they darken with anger, "i treat you like an equal, you know that." he spits out through gritted teeth.

"you don't!" you exclaim, the dam finally breaking inside of you. "you act like i can't handle anything on my own."

"that's because half the time it seems like-"

"like what?" you interrupt him, taking a step closer despite yourself.

"like…like maybe sometimes," his voice softens as he speaks now—almost pleadingly, "you could use some help."

you take one hand and shove him against the door, fingers digging into his robes, "i don't need your help. i don't need anything from you," you watch him sneer down at you, "and if you want honesty, then the truth is that i'd be far better off without you trailing around me all the time."

he gives an unamused laugh, "you know what i think?"

you don't dignify him with an answer prompting him to go on, "i think you shut down because you're scared," he grabs hold of your wrist, pulling you even closer to him, "i can sense it, you know. every time i see you all that radiates is fear. you're not even strong enough to hide it. what are you so damn afraid of, y/n?”

you pull away from him and shoot daggers before shoving him out of your path and exiting his room.

you rush to your own room, heart thudding in your chest. you attempt to stop yourself from thinking any further on what had just happened. sitting on the edge of your bed, you take deep breaths before burying you face in your hands. he was right—you were scared; scared of opening up and admitting how deeply you've grown to care for him.

he was beautiful, tragically so. and off limits in ways that made your chest feel heavy. you've tried to forget the way he makes you feel for years now. you've tried to tell yourself that what you feel isn't real. it can't be, not when you've sworn an oath against such notions.

yet, he remains a pertinent figure living in the back of your mind. a fantasy you indulge solely in the safety of seclusion.

the evening drags along slowly, and you take note his absence at dinner. his usual seat left empty, causing you to worry for him. it's futile to try and stop the obvious impact he has over you, especially after the fight.

he has a way of sowing himself indelibly to you.

though he remains so obvious in his fruitless kinship for you— you do the contrary. you keep your worries to yourself, and in the times you've been anything other than unemotional to him, you've reacted before thinking more than you care to admit.

you were mean, and even if he'd never know, it did hurt you to act in such a way. especially when all you really want is to see those blue eyes looking down on you with a loving gaze.

you push your food around on your plate, lost in thought, only to have a warm hand on your shoulder.

looking up, you find obi-wan, eyebrows drawn together is deliberation.

you try and push your thoughts away, masking your fears, "yes, master?"

he removes his previous look, replacing it with a soft smile, "y/n, i wanted to make sure you were okay. you took quite a blow today."

you have trouble meeting his eyes, "i'm fine master, just a small cut."

he lets his hand drop, "of course. i hope to see you for meditation tomorrow morning. it just may be of service."

he's gone before you can reply, leaving you alone with your unwanted dinner and thoughts.

hours pass by without you noticing them go. you attempt to train but your practice moves fall short. until, finally, it's late enough that even one of yoda's animated lessons couldn't keep someone from seeking sleep.

you make your way back to your room as fatigue sets in. your senses full of the one thing that refuses to ease its grip over you— anakin.

the exchange with him earlier continues to replay on a loop inside your mind, making it nearly impossible to drift off peacefully. you toss and turn for what feels like hours, restlessly upset.

abruptly, loud knocks echo through your room, interrupting your silent brooding whilst stirring the half slumber you’d found yourself in.

you can sense the familiar force signature, and you know it's anakin pounding away at your door. his energy seems off, less guarded and more haphazard. the feeling of it has you tensing.

nervous, you get out of bed and make your way to the door, still feeling hints of your previous anger and anxiety. you swing it open to find him standing on the other side, breathing heavily as if he had been running.

"what do you want?" you ask, trying your best to keep your voice level.

"i'm sorry," he says simply, not meeting your eyes.

you're taken aback by his apology, not expecting it, "for what?" you ask, confused.

"for the way i've been treating you," he says with a sigh. "i've been so focused on keeping you safe that i haven't been treating you like the equal that you are. and for what i said earlier… i didn't mean it. i just wanted to get a rise out of you."

you stare at him for a moment, trying to process his words. anakin has never been one to apologize easily, and you can sense that this is challenging for him.

slowly, you start to soften towards him, "come in." you say finally, and step aside to let him into your room.

he steps in and closes the door behind him, turning to face you. "i know we fight more often than we get along," he says tentatively. "but i don't want to lose you completely. i miss you. we used to be so... different."

you feel a lump in your throat at his words. despite everything that had happened with him, you know deep down that you don’t want to lose him either. but something is still stopping you from stating your full truth.

"well things are different now," you admit quietly. "we're different."

anakin looks at you, his eyes searching your face for meaning while his mouth forms a thin line. "why?" he asks finally.

you try to find the words but all that comes out is an half-baked excuse, "because that's just what happens, anakin."

"it doesn’t have to…" anakin presses gently and takes a step closer towards you. the heat from him fills up the room making it difficult to think straight let alone answer him honestly. you look away trying to avoid eye contact. with each second that passes by, your denial seems more insufferable.

he seems to notice this and steps even closer so now only inches are between the two of you before asking, "is it because…" his voice catches as he leans in “is it because you can tell how much i care for you. how easily you've become more to me. i tried so hard to hide, y/n, but i can’t anymore.”

you're taken aback by how easily the words leave anakin's lips despite not being able to ever even think of being as honest as him.

but at his admission, something cracks inside of you, allowing you to gain confidence, “no, i never knew you felt—” you falter at the way he's looking you down, face full of anticipation, "i never knew you felt that way. i thought it was only me."

anakin steps even closer, his breath hot against your skin. "never, i've always felt like this," he confesses, his voice low and gravelly. "from the moment i met you. maker, you've had me around your finger for years, i couldn't help but fall for you."

you feel your heart race as his words wash over you, mingled with the warmth of his body so close to yours. you can't deny the attraction that you've always felt— the electricity that seemed to spark whenever your eyes met, the way your skin tingled whenever he brushed past you.

"don't say that, ani," you whisper, feeling a rush, "this isn’t right, it could mean the worst for us, you know that."

anakin takes another step towards you, his hand reaching up to cup your cheek gently. "don't be scared, i’m not," he whispers, his eyes locked on yours. "i'm here for you. whatever happens, you know that."

time seems to still as you lean into his touch, getting lost in the heat of the moment despite yourself. you can feel his words through the softness of his touch.

and then suddenly his lips are on your own— fiercely and passionately. all of your warning thoughts fly out of your head as you surrender into him.

in that moment, there is nothing else but the two of you - lost in each other's embrace and finally free to show all the attachment that's been simmering beneath the surface for so long.

but then as quickly as it came, anakin pulls away and apologizes for the sudden kiss, visibly embarrassed by his impulsivity.

he takes a step back from you in an attempt to put some distance between you while he runs a hand through his hair nervously.

"sorry," he says softly, looking anywhere but your eyes, filled with surprise and confusion.

"i shouldn't have done that." he pauses before continuing in something barely more than a whisper this time, “i just… i'm sorry."

you stand there, still in shock from the sudden kiss but unable to deny the fluttering feeling in your heart. you want to tell him that it's okay, that you feel the same way, but you can't find the words.

anakin seems to read your thoughts, his eyes locking onto yours as he steps back once again. "i know this is a lot to take in," he says, his voice gentle and reassuring. "but i just needed you to know how i feel."

you nod, finally finding your voice. "i…i don't know what to say," you admit, feeling vulnerable and exposed.

for so long you’ve dreaded the idea of anakin knowing how you felt. you’ve been so afraid of rejection, that you’ve never considered the possibility of the inverse happening.

anakin reaches out, taking your hand, sending shivers down your spine with his touch, “you don't have to say anything," he says softly. "just know that i care about you…more than anything."

the two of you stand there for a second longer, lost in each other's eyes and the weight of unspoken words hanging heavy in the air.

finally, anakin breaks the silence. "i should go," he says reluctantly. "we can talk more about this later if you want…but only if you're ready."

you nod once more, still unsure of what to say or do. as anakin turns to leave, you find yourself calling out to him.

"ani…wait."

he turns back towards you, a hopeful look in his eyes.

"i care about you too, i'm not afraid of it anymore. i just want you." you whisper, feeling a weight lifted off of your shoulders.

anakin looks at you, a mix of shock and pure elation written on his face. he doesn't say anything, he just walks back towards you, taking your face in his hands before pressing his lips onto yours once again.

this time the kiss is even more intense than before, all of the the passion and desire that you've both kept buried for all these years flaring out. your hands make their way to his chest to you pull him closer to you.

anakin deepens the kiss as he wraps his arms around you, tugging you into an embrace that will no doubt carve itself into your very soul. you can feel the beat of his heart against you, matching the pace of your own rapid heartbeats.

when he finally pulls away, gasping for air, you can't stop the smile spreading on your face.

"i've always wanted this," anakin whispers softly, his forehead resting against yours. "i just didn't know how to tell you."

"i'm glad you did," you reply softly, running your fingers through his hair. "i didn't know how to say either."

the two of you stand there for a few moments longer before anakin finally pulls away. "i should go," he says reluctantly. "i'll see you tomorrow?"

you nod, feeling content and happy for the first time in a long time. as anakin leaves your room, you lay down on your bed with a smile on your face— grateful to be the aspect of his devotion.

#anakin skywalker angst #anakin x reader #anakin fluff #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin angst #anakin x y/n #anakin x you #anakin x reader angst #anakin skywalker x reader angst #anakin skywalker x you #anakin skywalker fluff #anakin and reader #anakin skywalker #star wars anakin

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cosmicanakin · 4 months

Text

giving your nerdy bf hickeys.

adult content | minors do NOT interact.

pairing. nerd!anakin x female reader.

contains. smut w no plot, hickeys.

authors note. love my nerdy baby <3

you’re hanging out with your boyfriend anakin at his small apartment, curled up together on the couch. as usual, your boyfriend has been reading some textbook on hyperspace mechanics, totally absorbed in the dense theories and equations.

smiling to yourself, you snake your arms around anakin’s waist from behind and place a gentle kiss to his neck. “put the nerdy stuff away for a bit, handsome. let me have your attention,” you murmur, nibbling his earlobe playfully.

anakin shivers, closing the book reluctantly before turning in your embrace. “mm, you definitely have my attention now, angel,” he rumbles, voice already deepening with want. you grin, pressing soft pecks along his strong jawline as anakin practically melts beneath your touch.

brushing his messy hair back, you suck lightly at the tender place below his ear. anakin sighs airily, hands coming up to your hair as you leave a faint pink mark. a thought suddenly occurs and you pull back with a mischievous glint, biting your lip.

“ani...what would you think about me giving you a hickey?” you ask softly. his eyes widen slightly behind his glasses before his cheeks flush a dark rose. “i, uh...i don’t know,” anakin stammers shyly, ever-modest and innocent. “i’ve never had one before.”

you smile reassuringly, caressing his face. “i won't do anything you’re not comfortable with, baby. i just think you’d look so sexy all marked up...” anakin’s blush deepens impossibly but he nods, gazing at you full of trust. “okay, you can try.”

leaning back in, you kiss along the strong column of his neck with tender reverence before sucking sharply below his adam’s apple. anakin gasps harshly, fingers gripping your sides tightly as you work the skin with your lips and tongue. he tastes faintly salty, musky, all man.

it doesn't take long for the beautiful purple bruise to bloom under your ministrations, standing out stark against anakin’s pale skin. sitting back to admire your handiwork, you can’t help a satisfied grin. “looks incredible, ani. so hot,” you purr, cradling his face for a deep kiss.

anakin seems almost in a trance, tenderly fingering the mark almost disbelievingly. “i...didn’t think it would feel so good,” he admits shyly, delight dancing in his gorgeous eyes. you hug him close, stroking his hair soothingly.

“i'm so happy you liked it. you deserve to feel cherished,” you murmur in his ear, brushing kisses along his strong jaw. anakin smiles sweetly, cupping your cheek as an idea comes to him too. “can i...try giving you one?” he asks hopefully.

you blink in surprise before nodding eagerly, already melting under his rare confidence. shifting to straddle his muscular thighs, you offer your neck invitingly. “please do, handsome,” you whisper, carding fingers through his thick hair encouragingly.

anakin takes a shaky breath, hands settling warm and sure at your waist, before tentatively pressing his lips below your jaw. you sigh contentedly as his mouth works, less skilled than your own but filled with loving care. soon a throbbing point of heat forms under your skin, making you squirm deliciously in anakin's lap.

he pulls back to gauge his work, tentative thumb brushing over the fluttering pulsepoint. “is it okay? did i do it right?” anakin questions timidly, always the gentle soul. you smile tenderly, cupping his face between your hands.

“it’s perfect. you make me feel so good,” you reassure, kissing him deeply. anakin grins with boyish delight, pulling you closer still. as the afternoon wanes and shadows lengthen, you trade sweet nothings and marks of affection between giggling bouts until dark.

later, when you bid him farewell for the night, anakin can’t help a soft gasp seeing the artwork you did on his neck in the mirror. you smirk playfully, pleased by his reaction, before tugging him down for a last passionate kiss. “goodnight, honey. see you tomorrow,” you whisper against his lips.

anakin smiles dopily, eyes glazed and hooded. “goodnight, angel. sleep well,” he rumbles, squeezing you tight once more before reluctantly letting go. as you walk home glowing, already missing his arms, you can’t stop touching the faintly throbbing hickey upon your skin - a beautiful brand of anakin's care, his very first. you know this won't be the last intimate secret you two share.

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forcemeanakin · 20 days

Text

Right where you left me.

•WARNINGS: Angst. Situationship. May trigger people with abandonment issues or that have intimacy problems. Not technically cheating, but it may be triggering. Anakin's a douche bag.

Pairing: au!Anakin Skywalker x you!reader.

Summary: Anakin decides to pursue things outside of your relationship, breaking your heart in the process.

Word count: 1.7k.

A/N: NOT PROOFREAD, english is my second language, so please be gentle. If there are any mistakes, pls let me know in private so I can correct them, thanks :) Also I have a serious issue between differentiating “in” and “on” situations, so bare with me lmao.

☽⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯✳⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯✺⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯✳⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯☾

You ran into the coffee shop, in a hurry, which is a normal state for you and your continuous tardiness. “Fuck.” You muttered under your breath as you forced the door open with unnecessary strength.

Anakin must’ve been waiting for half an hour now.

On your tippy toes, you scanned the room, looking for the golden curls to stand out from a booth.

Bingo.

Trying to hide your excitement, you rushed to the table where your -relatively- new thing was waiting for you. You cursed your bag for making so much noise and told yourself off for packing so much shit. Maybe there was no need to bring all the stuff with you, but you couldn’t help yourself in your excitement to show Anakin all of the activities you had planned for you two and the remaining part of the summer.

“Hey.” You whispered loud enough for him to listen to you, but your shortness of breath didn’t go unnoticed by him. He gave you a toothless smile as you sat down in front of him. “I’m sorry I’m late, I was at work and my manager-” You didn’t finish the sentence, instead, your face let him know everything he needed.

“Don’t sweat. I haven’t waited long. Five minutes to be exact.” He checked his phone carelessly.

Oh.

“Training ran long?” You hoped.

“Oh, no, just ran a little late.” He shrugged his shoulders. Like it was of no importance.

At least you felt ashamed for being late. He didn’t seem to carry the same guilt.

Sometimes Anakin did this thing that stung your heart a little. His number one priority had always been him. And when you agreed to try things with him, you knew that was implied in the contract. Part of you had been hoping that you were going to be the reason that changed.

So far, you had failed in your mission.

“Oh, right.” You tried to fake a smile.

“And how’s life outside of work, baby?”

And just like that, your heart felt a little lighter and spark returned to your face. Especially when he reached out to hold your hand and play with your fingers. Especially when he used that nickname that you loved and you hadn’t heard in a while from his lips.

“It’s fine. My summer classes are always boring.” You rolled your eyes, chuckling at the end because he knew how much you hated to take extra courses.

“I told you to give yourself some time off in the summer.” He raised his eyebrow.

“I know, I know…” You huffed. “Actually, I’ve been working on that.” You smiled, turning to your bag and taking some of the things you packed.

Tickets for one of your favorite movies, that he insisted he wanted to watch with you. It made you smile so hard when he had proposed that plan, given that he was aware how much that franchise meant to you.

You also took out some coins for the local fair, the one you two had walked by and promised to do that as your next date.

The brand new control for your gaming console you had just bought to join him in video games because he said he wanted to share that without you. He seemed pretty excited to do that as an activity together and he even listed all of the games you might like.

And right when you were about to take the keys of your summer house out, to hint him that you were ready to take the next step in your relationship, he stopped you.

Anything intimate always made you nervous, even when you two were in the middle of it. It was a very vulnerable space for you and Anakin was your first in many things. It was normal for you to still be adapting to it.

But you wanted to try. For you.

For him.

As a more experienced person than you, Anakin had needs. Needs that you sometimes failed to meet. That even though he was patient, you could feel how your lack of confidence sometimes bugged him. Not in an explicit manner, just… the occasional huff when he tried something experimental in bed or when you started to psych yourself out of the make out session.

Any other person would have already left, but Anakin was your friend first and he was well aware of your uptight personality way before the two of you agreed to be friends with benefits. He knew what he was getting into and he was actually glad to help you experiment with that part of yourself you normally hid.

So your demonstration of being an organized and planning psycho was nothing new to him.

“Hey, hey…” He slowed you down, barely gazing the things on the table and fixing his eyes on yours. “Before you get started, I wanted to talk to you.”

His serious tone alerted you. But you weren’t surprised. Something inside of you had been alerting you all weekend. You thought it was your well-known anxiety. However, this felt unusual. Like his habitual ghosting and lack of response for the past few days meant different things this time.

“Sure.” You took a deep breath, trying to make it not so obvious. “Go ahead.” You nodded with a little smile trying to appear serene.

“So, sorry for not replying to your texts this weekend. I was out in nature, thinking and connecting, you know?” He tilted his head, his eyes looking for some compassion out of you.

“Yeah, yeah, of course.” You rushed the words when the silence dipped between you two, part of it your fault because you were too worried with your sinking heart.

You could understand a little impromptu retreat, you only wished it wasn’t right after you did some pretty intimate stuff back at your house. That last day you two crossed more boundaries than ever before. And even though you highly enjoyed it, his absence after that had you feeling nauseous, making you overthink and regret your decision of not giving him your virginity right in that opportunity. Maybe he would have shown more interest if you would have-

“So…Uhm… I think we should stop hanging out.”

Your heart was down by your feet when he pronounced those words. You tried with all your soul to control your trembling hands that lied in between his palms so he didn’t notice how he was ripping you apart. Your irregular breath threatened to put you on blast but you managed to keep it on the low.

“It’s not about you, seriously. I love hanging out with you and spending time with you, among other stuff.” He chuckled lightly, but instead of following his action, you released the breath you were holding. “But I’ve been talking to this girl and I just want to make sure that everything is working out with her. Emotionally.”

The sting in your eyes only grew bigger as you realized how embarrassing and heart shattering this moment was for you. Your cheeks felt hot and tight, something you tried hard to disguise with a breezy exterior.

Like a flash, you remembered the day both of you talked about the rules of your agreement. You kicked yourself mentally when you reminisced of the moment where both of you agreed to let the other one know if they wanted to pursue something with someone else. You had said yes, in the expectation that his constant checking in on you and daily talks was enough proof of interest. Meaning that he would not be looking outside of your “situationship” .

And you agreed, because that was your case. You were interested enough.

“You let me know if you want to see another guy, okay?”

You could almost laugh at such stupid idea. Didn’t he know?

“I think it’s better if we stop talking, so I can figure out things with her.” He scrunched his nose, like he was running out of words.

But how many words do you actually need to let someone know you don’t want them? He didn’t need much more. You’ve gotten the message.

“It’s nothing definitive, but yeah… Let me know if you have any questions.” He gave you a side smile, still fidgeting with your frozen-in-place fingers.

That took you out of the slow motion trance you were in.

“Y-yeah, okay.” You took your hands out of his quickly, blinking quickly into realization. You started to rush everything back in your purse, screaming the word “Stupid!” over and over again in your head while you carried on with a calm expression. “Do not worry about me. No questions on my part. Thanks for letting me know.”

I guess.

“Totally agree with not talking anymore.” You finally stopped for a second after pushing all of the items on your tote bag. He seemed to be analyzing your expression in search of any sign of real approval, because your shy and cold body language wasn’t reassuring him. So you put on your bravest face and forced a smile. “I hope everything turns out great with her.”

Speaking those words felt like hot iron was passing through your throat.

He gave you an honest smile and got up, taking his jacket with him. “Thank you. And thanks for understanding.”

You stayed frozen in place, your purse on your lap with your hands clutching it so hard you could feel your nails through the fabric. You limited yourself to nodding quietly and letting the side of your mouth curve slightly up.

“I’m sorry I can’t stay-” He began explaining his sudden escape.

“Don’t be. Don’t worry about me. ” You dismissed. “I’ll just stay and have lunch.” You took the menu and fixed your gaze on the listed items, anything that wouldn’t be his eyes.

He excused himself off the table politely, leaving you all alone and speechless. You glued your eyes to his back until he exited through the door, begging silently that he would turn around and say something else. Something that would pull you back into his life.

It seemed like that wasn’t his plan.

“I know I shouldn’t look for you for sexual stuff, but can I contact you for friend stuff?”

The text arrived that Saturday at 1am, 5 days later, erasing any progress you had done.

The day of his usual drunken nights.

Right around the time he used to get bored and there wasn't anything left to smoke.

Exactly at the time he would always contact you.

And you?

You were still at the restaurant. Unable to move.

Every day since that day.

Right where he left you.

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