#and High Femme Penelope

[hyperfixationstati0n]

hiii i love your works! can i request spencer x bau!reader who drags spencer to the eras tour but they get called into a case and show up to work in like crazy outfits and get teased by the team??

i LOVED writing this request. The picture above is what i envisioned when describing the outfits :) (also to whoever requested this thank you so much i love love love you!! if you have any requests send them my way!!!!!)

Pairing: Spencer x Bau!kinda femme!reader

Content warnings: None really :)

Word count: 667

Tonight was the night! You were buzzing in your seat, staring up at the stage. Your incredible boyfriend had not only gotten you tickets to the Eras tour, but also managed to get floor seats. You were holding his hand, feeling as though at any moment you would explode from sheer excitement. You look down at your outfit, a jeweled corset top and a black sequin pencil skirt. You actually find yourself at a similar height to him in your black thigh-high boots. Spencer was in an outfit you had personally orchestrated for him-a pastel pink and blue shirt (in honor of his favorite album, Lover), jeans, and his usual converse. You did also convince him to have a matching, very sparkly, 13 on his hand. Just then, the stage lights up. You both jump up in your seats. Over the years you had been dating, you managed to turn him into a certified Swiftie. 

Normally, you were pretty shy. Outside of talking to victims or families on cases, you weren’t very social and tended to stay pretty quiet. But at that moment, you didn’t care how ridiculous you looked. You were seeing your all time favorite artist, with the man you loved, surrounded by thousands of other people who were just like you. You sang your heart out, even getting Spencer to dance with you during a few of the songs. It all came to a crash during ‘Style’-which really should have been a magical moment, considering it was both you and Spencer's favorite song. You have your phone out, recording the song, screaming your heart out-when you see it. A message from Hotch. Telling you that you have a case, and to get to the office immediately. Your heart drops, as well as your phone. You bend down to pick it up as Spencer registers what this really means. You look at him, completely heartbroken. He pulls you into a hug and kisses the top of your head.

“I’m so sorry” He says, having to yell over the sound of hearing your favorite song-your song-live.

You nod and try to find a way out of the crowd.

“They fucking owe me.” You tell back, grabbing his hand and making your way out of the stadium, out of what was shaping to be the best night of your life, and out to your car.

It’s not until you actually make it into the briefing room that you realize that you both look absolutely ridiculous. Not only because of your outfits-but you were both decently dissheveled from fighting your way out of the crowd. You both stand there like a deer in headlights as the whole team turns their heads. Morgan is the first one to start laughing, both you and Spencer sheepishly taking your seats. Penelope registers why you’re wearing what you’re wearing first, and her heart seems to break for you.

“Nice shirt Reid.” JJ says with a chuckle.

“Oh my goodness…you guys were at the Eras Tour?!” She exclaims, her arms dropping. 

You both nod, as the information sinks in, everyone now less confused about what you were wearing.

Everyone seems very amused, but you were still pissed at the fact that you were plucked out of the concert a little before halfway through. You stare down Hotch, even he was smiling.

“You owe me. I didn’t even get to hear ‘Shake It Off’” You say, trying to seem annoyed, but truthfully you couldn’t keep a straight face with everyone laughing. The situation was too ridiculous, even Spencer couldn’t contain his laughter, as embarrassed as he was.

“If we wrap up this case quick enough, I’ll try to replace your tickets.” Rossi says, chuckling. “I’ll have you ‘Shaking it off’ in no time.”

You all burst into laughter before Hotch speaks over the room.

“Let’s get to work everyone-and you two, change before we leave.” You both gave him a thumbs up, leaning back in your seat to be briefed on the latest case. 

#criminal minds #x reader #spencer reid #spencer x reader #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds fanfiction #fanfic

[smoothpowerforthestreets]

❤️‍🔥🗡️🍸🌹I TRIED POPULAR FEMME FATALE TIPS FOR A YEAR🌹🍸🗡️❤️‍🔥

Hello everyone! I always have been fascinated by the femme fatale energy and I was so obsessed as a kid with femme fatales like Ava Gardner, Marilyn Monroe, Gilda by Rita Hayworth and some characters by Angelina Jolie or Penelope Cruz.

I never tried to tap into the femme fatale energy because I always thought that I didn't fit the "aesthetic", then I read Ava Gardner's biography how she made womanizer Sinatra go suicidal for her and I noticed that femme fatale energy isn't about looks or aesthetic (partially) but your attitude, energy and self love. So I started to get all the information I could about femme fatales and these are the most popular tips I've tried:

💋 Let them pursue. Let them show you how much are they interested in you and how far would they go for your attention.

I think this one it's not exclusive about FemF it's something that every girl should do. It's really simple: if they really want you they'll move mountains for you, and girl, don't even think it's because you set your standards too high because it's the bare minimum. Stop being in situationships where it's very clear that he doesn't want you, I'm sorry but it's really pathetic.

My experience: I've been applying this boundary for a long time now and it's the most effective way to see who actually wants you. Why? Because it's too simple, if they want to they will. This saved me a lot of situationships and giving access and power to someone who doesn't want me. The results are a little annoying because let's be real, boys🤡, they always come back so when I say it's annoying it's because it's ridiculous to see them get confused and then pursue you when it's too late. AND LET ME TELL YOU, when I put a cross on your name there's no way to erase it (metaphorically). Ugh, really why do they do that? They make clear that they don't want you and when you cut them off they decide to come back in the way you seem to want. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE, don't go back to them, if they really wanted you that badly they would never have put you in that position.

💋 Don't be impressed by the things they think can get you. I'm talking about superficial things like physical appearance, fame, money, properties, cars, luxury lifestyle, etc. Please I know everyone loves money but believe me when I say it doesn't get you anywhere mentally if you don't have your shit together, don't let desire for rich appearances guide you to shitty men just because they can provide money. You should be able to afford your things so you don't have to be waiting for a man like a poor dog.

My experience: Girl I'm going to spill some tea about this one. I had two famous men asking me on a date, one of them I no longer speak to him and the other one is currently pursuing me like crazy just because he saw I was not amused about the luxury things he was bragging. We're friends for now because I don't trust him lol but he tries every now and then to ask me on a date. Girl trust me it's not that rare to get that type of men, almost every friend of mine has been pursued by a man in power.

💋 Trust in the feminine power. Trust in the power that a smile or a gaze has, learn from the best: Angelina Jolie, Marilyn Monroe, Ava Gardner... A subtle way to let a man know that you like him and you can have him going all over you. How many times a man has approached you just because you looked at him? That's the power you have, women have that power.

My experience: Not so long ago I had a thing with a man and somehow we lost contact but we have a friend in common so we see each other often. The other day I tried this technique to see if a gaze was enough to let him know that I'm interested and it's true, I looked at him directly into his eyes and that was enough to have him the rest of the night right by my side.

💋Red nails theory. The color red is said to represent passion, love and sensuality. The red nail theory got viral on TikTok because a girl said that the reason she attracted more men with red nails was because they saw a lot of red nails while growing up.

My experience: I got my nails done red and I don't think much changed. I think red is a color that generally attracts men but I don't think it's something exclusive for nails. A red lipstick or dress will always be on point.

💋 Be cold af. Not every time but when he does something to annoy you don't react. Could be he's trying to make you jealous, to see how you react or how much you care about him. DON'T REACT, even if it's killing you inside. Act like you couldn't care less and move on. He still flirts to other girls? Then that means you're not in a committed relationship and you can flirt with whoever you want to too.

My experience: This one is sooooo fun to apply and I like to add a little spice and mirror their behaviour. Because when they do something I don't like I usually cut them off and that's it, but when I know they did it to hurt me I like to have my revenge. You've met your match bitch.

I was getting to know this guy who made very clear that he enjoyed single life so I did too and when he saw me on another date he went nuts and stopped seeing other girls. But one day he got angry because I said that I found attractive one of his friends and that night he started a little flirt in front of me with a girl so I just said I'm going to say hello to someone and I went to do the same with his friend. He immediately came so angry, asked for a word alone and told me to stop messing around. He asked me to be in a committed relationship the next day and that was the last time I saw him. I know it seems so toxic but I didn't want a relationship with him and he tried to hurt me so idc.🤷‍♀️

Sorry if you see some spelling mistakes, english is not my first language!

#self love #self concept #manifesting #energy #girl advice #angelina jolie #femme fatale #girlblogging #just girlboss things #female hysteria #girlboss #red nails theory #ava gardner #marilyn monroe #rita hayworth #gilda #dark femininity #lana del rey aesthetic #dating advice #girl blogger #girly advice #woman

[jenny-from-the-bau]

My dream gaytrans cast? Glad you asked!

Emily: Long Hair Butch Dyke Boyfriend

JJ: Short Hair Boy Band Bisexual GF

Hotch: Stealth Man Kinsey 1

Reid: Twink GirlBoy Self-Made Man Girlfriend

Derek: Stealth Bi Painted Nails Boyfriend

Rossi: Bearded Queen He/Him Divorced Dad

Penelope: High Femme Queer Trans Babygirl

Tara: Soft Butch Kinsey 5 Car Knife GF

Luke: Babygirl Sigma Grindset Boyfriend

Matt: Girl Dad Bi Husband Malewife

#none of these are words #jdhajfja #but also #the 'girls' who get it get it!!!!! #criminal minds #bau #team #og

[im-not-a-l0ser]

The Michie Playlist

Here's the songs sent in through asks and my opinion on them. If you're following along in the playlist, these songs are further down and you may want to go to the og songs or my songs before reading the rest.

Sadly, I only got a few requests, but it's fine. I like the songs we have. But I'll still take requests, and I'll probably add to this post then.

Requested by @24-guy

Wont: I completely see why you would debate whether this is a michie song or not. I'm gonna go ahead and say yes, it is. Michie isn't a perfect relationship, it's allowed to have this as a song. There are different perceptions of Michie, and I actually think that having songs like this on the playlist is good for facing the reality of where their relationship would begin. It's definitely staying.

Requested by @milgram

A House in Nebraska: oW c'mon man, what the hell!

Sally's Song: So is this just gonna be a theme with you? Sad songs? It's staying too, but blahhh

Bug (Niigo Version): So, unfortunately, I can't find this song on ytmusic or spotify. So. It's not on the playlist.

Role of a Lifetime: It is a pattern. I'm so fucking sad rn. But to be fair, Bare in general makes me sad. That cowardice tho, very real, oWww.

Moving in Place: Oh, I can't decide if I like or really hate her voice. It's like femme McCafferty meets Penelope Scott meets a 12 year old. That's all I can focus on right now, okay, lemme try to listen to the lyrics. The substance abuse is the only thing that's like "I don't see that." I feel like Max can only get high on rare rare occasions, to avoid the risk of his father... doing bad thing because of it. Richie, I can see getting high as a stress releif thing, and I stand by the headcannon that he gets high with Zoey and Deb.

#starkid #nerdy prudes must die #richie lipschitz #max jagerman #michie #hatchetfield #the michie playlist #the playlist series

[blorbo-adoption-poll]

Preliminaries round 2 match 10

Penny Pingleton (Hairspray) vs Penny Pointer (Tangle Tower) vs Penelope (Hamtaro)

Only two may move on

Propaganda under the cut

Penny Pingleton (Hairspray)

• Idk I don’t actually like hairspray I just felt weird she wasn’t on the list already

Pollrunner note: it’s been a while but I remember liking this musical, I had to sing the songs for choir.

Penny Pointer (Tangle Tower)

• she's a high-fashion murder suspect!

she's described by her designers to have a duality between a cool elegant femme fatale and a pouty petulant young woman, and appears very loud and energetic (or melodramatic depending on how you look at it!) she lives in a huge tower split down the middle between two families, with a deep history magical creatures and backstabbing - which she is directly involved in!

she has the facade of a very extravagant, melodramatic, jet-setting woman but is implied to be much much sadder and lonelier than she appears, it's even implied her fiance (whom she isn't even sure if she loves very much) is cheating on her with her cousin who also lives in the tower. though she states that her love for traveling is limited only by her love for her fiance, as he doesn't like to travel at all.

she's very involved with birds and researching them, and enjoys traveling to different places to study different bird species. she spends a majority of her time in her aviary which hangs off the side of the tower and looks like a giant birdcage. she even dresses like her birds with long sleeves that she swooshes around like bird wings, and wears one of her birds as a hat. in earlier designs she'd also have several birds on her person and interrupt conversations to chat with them <33

though she says she studies birds because it's the only thing she's good at :(

fun facts!: she's an aquarius and when shown a cassette tape combining three different shades of pink she appears offended

Penelope (Hamtaro)

• No propaganda given

Pollrunner note: is hamster in a blanket

#penny poll #tournament poll #Penny Pingleton #hairspray #penny pointer #tangle tower #hamtaro #penelope hamtaro

[lilaxwinemoved]

Jean-Heron Vicquemare (listen)

Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High? Arctic Monkeys / Eight, Sleeping At Last / Cold Love, Rainbow Kitten Surprise / Mr. Rattlebone, Matt Maeson / I Bet on Losing Dogs, Mitski / Heaven Knows I'm Miserable, Now, The Smiths / Dance Yrself Clean, LCD Soundsystem / Busted and Blue, Gorillaz / Why Are Sundays So Depressing, The Strokes / Bad Blood, Bastille / The Agency Group, Alvvays / Où va le monde, La Femme / No Surprises, Radiohead / Hunger, Florence + The Machine / No Need To Cry, Sea Power / I'm Just a Buzzkill, Mickey Darling / I'll Believe in Anything, Wolf Parade / Putting The Dog To Sleep, The Antlers / Cadaver Sniffing Dog, The Mountain Goats / Cigarette Ahegao, Penelope Scott / One Way Trigger, The Strokes / Your Heart Is a Muscle the Size of Your Fist, Ramshackle Glory / Monsoon, Hippo Campus / Pale Blue Eyes, The Velvet Underground / Boys Don't Cry, The Cure / Come Over (Again), Crawlers / Harry, Macseal / Looks Like Rain, Passion Pit / Sweetie Little Jean, Cage The Elephant / Drunk Drivers/Killer Whales, Car Seat Headrest / Nude, Radiohead

#( jean. in dog years i'm dead ) #( music. a transmission on the midnight radio ) #( the fact that this playlist isn't even done ) #( i have so many thoughts about this man ) #( to tag the fandom or to not... )

[scribe-scribbling]

Introduction

Hi! I'm Scribe or Cyr, this blog is for organizing my OCs.

《 in my veins

|| lucien

~Urban Fantasy, set in the fictional city of Elmbridge~

A modern Siren, the ultimate Wife Guy, whore for glitter.

🎵The Main Character - Will Wood🎵

|| mae

Powerful healer, bitchy big sister, not taking your shit.

🎵Walk With Me - Willowbrook🎵

|| olivia

Always listening bartender, quietly raging, overly organised bookkeeper.

🎵The Moon Will Sing - The Crane Wives🎵

|| evan

Protector, silent hunter, broody superman.

🎵Come Over (Again) - Crawlers🎵

|| william

Ancient Vampire, major dad energy, forever grieved poet.

🎵My Love - Florence + The Machine🎵

|| alexandra

Ruthless avenger, shadow girl, untamed lost child.

🎵Born For This - The Score🎵

|| leo

Lightning boy, awful partner, loves to meddle.

🎵All My Love - Noah Kahan🎵

|| cameron

All-seeing oracle, cold-hearted traitor, mourning lover.

🎵Back In Town - Florence + The Machine🎵

|| trixie

Little God, wanderlust afflicted, loyal daughter.

🎵Paul Revere - Noah Kahan🎵

|| aurelia

Angelic singer, illusion crafter, misses her family.

🎵Orange Juice - Noah Kahan🎵

|| beau

A corporeal ghost, monochrome glam, overdramatic drummer.

🎵River - Bishop Briggs🎵

|| caine

Grieving widow, village crazy lady, madness incarnate.

🎵Free - Florence + The Machine🎵

|| nox

Magically empowered nerd, teaches dark magic, bookshop owner.

🎵Eat You Alive - The Oh Hellos🎵

|| lyra

Stubbornly optimistic, litteral ray of sunshine, overly peppy cage fighter.

🎵The Mountain Song - Tophouse🎵

|| ariadne

Spider queen, whip smart buisness woman, tongue dripping poision.

🎵Venom - Little Simz🎵

otp: glitter hearts and neon blood (lucien x aurelia)

otp: sunshine in silence (olivia x lyra)

otp: together or not at all (evan x leo)

otp: within these walls (cameron x leo)

otp: the sound of distant drumming (beau x ariadne)

Brotp: unending wanderlust (trixie x caine)

Brotp: bloodied books (nox x william)

Brotp: (cameron x alexandra x leo)

《 celestial mechanisms

|| ether

~Sci-fi hoverbike racing set on the Cyber world of Neocrest~

Talented racer, incredible modder, unsettling energy.

🎵Boss Bitch - Doja Cat🎵

|| genesis

Guilt striken, burnt out almost star, trying his best.

🎵Love Me, Normally - Will Wood🎵

|| chrome

Worlds best racer, old money runaway, overprotective.

🎵Vroom Vroom - Charlie XCX🎵

|| nova

Spoiled rich brat, freak genius, high femme at all times.

🎵as good a reason - Paris Paloma🎵

|| photon

Shy photographer, unintentional blackmailer, wracked with insecurity.

🎵Sweet Hibiscus Tea - Penelope Scott🎵

|| glitch

Charming scammer, former racer, menace when left alone.

🎵Greedy - Swiblet🎵

otp: first love again (ether x genesis)

otp: (glitch x chrome)

Brotp: (ether x chrome)

Brotp: (photon x nova)

《 blood on your teeth

|| emmie

~Wrestling, mainly set in AEW~

Ambitious fighter, passionate lover, stubbornly self destructive.

🎵King- Florence + The Machine🎵

#《 in my veins #《 celestial mechanisms #《 blood on your teeth

[repriseofthereprise]

Heteropatriarchal Semantics and Lesbian Identity: The Ways a Lesbian Can Be

by Julia Penelope

From her book Call Me Lesbian: Lesbian Lives, Lesbian Theory (Crossing Press, 1992)

Introduction

Of the “issues” that have disturbed and disrupted Lesbian communities during the past two decades, one, in particular, has the potential to destroy our efforts to mobilize Lesbians, to create a Lesbian movement grounded in a Lesbian stance: femininity. The repeated rationales offered for embracing femininity have generated anger and hostilities because they strike at the heart of what it means to be a Lesbian in a heteropatriarchy: one who resists efforts to make her into “a woman”; one who defies the male descriptions and prescriptions that would limit her possibilities; one who refuses the very foundations of heteropatriarchal reality. Our identity as Lesbians is at stake.

Whatever one chooses to call them, “lipstick Lesbians,” “dykes for spikes,” or “femmes,”1 they have appeared in our communities and our movement in a variety of guises, demanding our support and approval for their appearance and behavior, asserting their “right” to wear make-up, high heels, and garter belts, to allow men to fuck them, and to exploit, use, and abuse Lesbians at will. When Lesbians like me object to their assertions, they insult us, belittle our lives, and call us their “oppressors.” In short, their agenda is to destroy the Lesbian political movement by alternately playing the “victim” and then bullying, by lying, by coquetry, by manipulation, and by just plain stupidity.

I don’t understand why some Lesbians feel so righteous, so sure of themselves, when they extol the virtues of Lesbian “femininity” and attack Lesbian “masculinity.” I have trouble listening to Lesbians who use either word as though it were meaningful in a Lesbian context, because both femininity and masculinity are heteropatriarchal (HP) terms that establish the boundaries of what is “acceptable,” “permissible” appearance and behavior for females, Lesbians included. Heteropatriarchal semantics (HS) equates femininity with femaleness and masculinity with maleness, as though behaviors and personality traits were determined by biological sex. On the basis of that equation, HP values femininity in females and masculinity in males. Only feminine females are considered “good” in HP, yet what is described as “masculinity” is held up to us as the ideal of what it means to be “human.” As a result of these descriptions, the female who embraces the femininity forced on her by HP is trapped in a semantic double-bind. The woman who learns the behaviors and modes of thought attributed to femininity and becomes feminine is, by definition, less than “human.” “Masculinity,” in contrast, not only establishes the cultural boundaries for men, it taboos those behaviors and aspirations for females. Thus, femininity is made to seem attractive because females who act “like a man” are deviant, and, therefore, “bad”; women willingly acquire the appurtenances of femininity even though it inherently relegates them to second-class status because it’s the only “positive” option available in HP terms. Within this framework, it’s apparently better to be rewarded for accepting one’s devaluation than to be devalued for defying the limitations imposed by male hegemony.

Sadly, Lesbians who challenge those who embrace and extol femininity are attacked as “oppressors,” ridiculed for “aping men,” and labeled “fascists” and “neo-Nazis.” Lesbians who accept the HP dichotomy as meaningful remain trapped within the either/or thinking some of us are trying to unlearn. Lesbians committed to personal and social change not only want to rid ourselves of the HS dichotomy and the HP misogyny that values femininity, we want to learn how to think beyond the limitations imposed by words like feminine and masculine and imagine what it would be like to be neither.

In order to start this process, we have to start by asking: What does it mean to be a Lesbian in a Lesbian context? Our discussion can begin, I think, by identifying how Lesbians differ from heterosexuals, bisexuals, and gaymen, and acknowledging that our oppression is based on those differences. Just as blacks begin to establish their identity as distinct from their white oppressors, as native Americans resist the identities imposed on them by the white men who’ve destroyed their cultures, so Lesbians must make our difference the focus of our identity and resist those who wish to validate an identity constructed for us by men. We need to identify the features that make us uniquely Lesbian; it is, after all, the reason we’re outcasts. We cannot ignore the heteropatriarchy or its values any more than we can pretend that we weren’t born into, raised, and live in HP, and the fact that many of our ideas and assumptions are heteropatriarchal in origin. But we can certainly start unlearning those values and assumptions, and the first step is rejecting femininity and the idea that it’s a “good thing” for us.

Today, Lesbians remain divided by HP dichotomies, bouncing back and forth between the “feminine” and “masculine” poles, because we still accept as valid men’s descriptions of “what is.” A majority of Lesbians haven’t even begun to imagine who we might be or to look for options outside of HP boundaries; they are still preoccupied with devising ways of surviving more (and less) comfortably within the HP context, which requires accepting as real the world described by HP terms.

The argument isn’t about whether to be “feminine” or “masculine.” It’s about what being a Lesbian means. What is Lesbian identity? What does it mean to be a Lesbian, live as a Lesbian, think as a Lesbian, in a Lesbian context? So we have to begin by identifying how we differ from heterosexual women and bisexuals and make our deviance the core of our identity. Lesbians don’t fuck men. We are the only group in the world that refuses to place men at the center of our lives. We are the only group whose lives are focused on women.

But we are also not a homogeneous group. In our efforts to establish the basis of Lesbian identity, we are constantly engaged in confronting how the life histories we bring with us into Lesbian communities complicate and confuse our interactions. Because we each have different experiences and backgrounds,2 we have to be willing to name and acknowledge the HP assumptions and values we bring with us into a Lesbian context. We must do this before we can rid ourselves of the HP elements that divide us from one another. We have to acknowledge the HP attitudes we still possess before we can unlearn them. And we can accomplish both. White Lesbians unlearning racism is a good example of this process; unlearning ageist attitudes is another.

I, for one, don’t believe that femininity can be positively valued in a Lesbian context, and I will explain why rejecting femininity is an essentially Lesbian act.

Identifying the Problem

Lesbians are divided from each other by the descriptions of “the world” we accept as valid and accurate; we do not begin our Lesbian lives or enter our Lesbian communities untainted by HP ways of thinking and acting. Many of our political differences can be traced to how thoroughly we believe the version of reality men have presented to us. Some Lesbians believe that the HP description of reality is essentially accurate, while others believe that it’s utterly false. Some Lesbians accept portions of HP reality that other Lesbians have rejected. Our commitment to the assumptions of HP is reflected in the ways we use English.

Our experience with acquiring a first language deceives us into believing that there is a single reality, the one encoded and described to us by that language. Many U. S. Lesbians learned English as our first language and, with it, the U. S. version of reality. English, like any language, describes the version of reality preferred by the majority of speakers in a society, and forces us to accept the reality agreed upon by those speakers. The United States is a heteropatriarchal society, a culture that assumes that heterosexuality is “natural,” that male dominance is “natural,” and that female subordination is “natural”; English provides its speakers with ways of expressing these assumptions as though they were incontrovertible facts. The words masculine and feminine exist only because they express concepts essential to the maintenance of HP reality. But the existence and continual use of these words doesn’t mean that they denote “real” or actual things.

The English language is a grid, a conceptual frame, that a society imposes on the experience and perceptions of its speakers. There are ways of getting around that grid, ways of expressing values and perceptions not validated by the culture, but that takes work and thought that most people are unwilling to invest in talking and writing. As long as a Lesbian uses words sanctioned, supported, and accepted by HP culture, she risks being understood and interpreted within the limits of the reality described by English. To imagine that we can use English and totally avoid its HP assumptions is a delusion that’s especially dangerous for Lesbians.

Lesbian speakers have a “semantic problem,” but it isn’t one of our own creation. It was imposed on us when we learned to think and talk in English. (I don’t think dialect makes a difference here.) Some Lesbians may resist my assertion that our problem is semantic, because dysfunctional communication in heteropatriarchy is swept under the rug with statements like “It’s just a semantic problem,” “It’s only a question of semantics,” or “Don’t play semantic games with me,” as though semantics were irrelevant, or an excuse to muddy the waters that someone else thinks are “clear.” I want to say that semantics is important, and we need to pay much closer attention to semantics than we do. We cannot adopt as workable the HP assertion that semantics is trivial, and we cannot continue to ignore the ways that semantics causes miscommunication among us.

Our semantic problems often stem from the divergent versions of reality we accept, and we get into trouble when we assume that our use of the same words means we’re talking about the same things. A good example of semantic confusion occurred in Lesbian Ethics during 1985-86 (the Fall, 1985 issue), in which Linda Strega’s “The Big Sell-Out: Lesbian Femininity” appeared, and the Spring, 1986 issue, in which Paula Mariedaughter and Mary Crane responded to Strega’s analysis.3 In her article, Strega used the terms butch and femme to refer to differences among Lesbians because the labels are part of Lesbian tradition and so already have meaning for her Lesbian audience. Strega used the word butch differently than it has been and continues to be used among some Lesbians, investing it with political substance and, in the process, appearing to conflate the reference of butch and Lesbian. But butch and femme carry with them a lot of semantic baggage from our Lesbian herstory. What the terms have meant in the past, and the way Lesbians like Mariedaughter and Crane use them, wasn’t the way Strega wanted to use them. Their use of the same words made it seem as though they were talking about the same aspects of Lesbian living, but they weren’t. One of Strega’s most important points was her observation that Lesbians in general value feminine Lesbians much more than they value masculine Lesbians. The Lesbian community generally discredits, even shuns, (life-long) masculine Lesbians because we fit the twentieth century stereotype (promulgated by the nineteenth-century sexologists) of “the real Lesbian,” while, in contrast, it listens to, even lionizes, feminine Lesbians, because they fit the HP stereotype of “the womanly woman.”4

That valuing femininity more than what is perceived as masculinity among us reflects an especially nasty form of Lesbian-hating is, I think, beyond question. Why conformity to a male ideal would give feminine Lesbians more credibility among us continues to puzzle me. In order to understand our confusion and move toward a resolution of it, I think we need to begin with its sources in the heteropatriarchal semantics (HS) of English.

Heteropatriarchal Semantics

Why do Lesbians follow heterosexuals in valuing feminine women and devaluing “mannish” women? The answer lies in the semantics of English. Diagram 1 presents the basic semantic dichotomy of HP and its internal logic. It represents an important piece of the HP semantic system called “consensus reality.” “Consensus reality” refers to that version of reality which most people accept as true and act upon as though it were true. The diagram is a way of visualizing how this portion of semantic “space” is stored in our long-term memory, a picture of the grid that heteropatriarchal teaching has imposed on our experiences. (I’ve substituted words at each level for semantic features.)

The semantic grid of Diagram 1 represents the HP version of what “being human” means. The essential dichotomy that gives this grid its meaning is based on the much-touted sexual dimorphism of “our” species. That is, homo sapiens (sic!) is described as having two sexes which differ from each other in primary and secondary sexual characteristics. But this is only a partial description of the world we comprehend through our senses. For example, the existence of hermaphrodites exposes the inadequacy of the grid as a description of the world, while the word hermaphrodite, a compound (hermes [+MALE] and aphrodite [-MALE]) based on the dichotomy, isn’t much more than a clumsy attempt to preserve the HP semantic structure in spite of contradicting evidence. What we have here is a description of reality that isn’t accurate, one that tries to account for aspects of reality not covered by its dichotomy by simply repeating the dichotomy itself.

Sexual dimorphism is the foundation of HP semantics, politics, and personality. Personality, according to HP, is based on biological sex. Biology determines behavior, mannerisms, appearance, emotional style, and how one thinks. This is a monocausal ideology. Sexual dimorphism is the reproductive strategy for numerous species, but it’s neither necessary nor inevitable, nor is it biologically superior to other reproductive methods (as is commonly believed). Many species in addition to our own are now known to reproduce parthenogenetically (for example, lizards, fish, seagulls, and some plants). Only humans seem to be obsessed with their reproductive capacity, as though they’d invented and perfected it. Contrary to popular thinking, it’s not at all obvious that biological sex or reproductive potential should be the basis of personality. One might just as well posit height, weight, or the position of constellations with respect to the earth at the time of one’s birth, as astrology does, as the source of personality. (Conventional astrology incorporates sexual dimorphism in its descriptions of personality types.)

Heterosexuality doesn’t appear overtly in Diagram 1 because it’s integral to the HP description of the world. The logic of HP assumes that heterosexuality necessarily follows from sexual dimorphism, expressed as “The Stick-in-the-Hole Theory of Behavior” or, “Function Follows Form”:

1) Men have pricks, women have vaginas; 2) Pricks can be stuck into vaginas; ERGO: Vaginas exist because pricks exist.

The possession of genitalia of a specific kind is believed to necessitate its usage in a specific way. The assumption that function follows form and is, therefore, “natural,” is deeply ingrained. It isn’t surprising that Lesbians as well as heterosexuals believe this. That which is assumed, primary, and implicit is difficult to challenge. Heterosexuality is hard for Lesbians to question because our outcast status depends on it; in a binary view of the world, we are its antithesis.

The ideas of heterosexuality and its “naturalness” cannot be questioned in HP: they aren’t “open to question,” like yours or mine, and aren’t supposed to be challenged. If you doubt this, put a bumpersticker on your car (or bike or skateboard) that says, “If Abortion is a Crime, Fucking Should be a Felony.” A female’s right to terminate a pregnancy is open to question; the “necessity” of heterosexual coitus (fucking) isn’t. Other cultures deal with sexual dimorphism differently, and this is reflected in their languages. I am concerned here only with the culture imposed in the continental United States. Some Lesbians, in an effort to deny the privileges they get for being feminine, get into “cultural relativity,” and how this or that behavior or mode of dress differs from one culture to another (as in Lesbian Connection 9, 1 [July/August 1986], p. 17). I’m not talking about saris or mu-mus or the kilts worn by men of the Scottish clans, but about what skirts, dresses, high heels, and make-up mean in the U.S., in the twentieth century.

Sexual dimorphism underlies HP semantics, along with its corollary assumption, heterosexuality. Dividing a species into male and female is only the first step. If one accepts the idea that biological sex is a significant feature, one might suppose that that distinction would result in semantic features like +MALE and +FEMALE. But this isn’t the case in English. Instead, sexual dimorphism is coded as +MALE and -MALE. That females are -MALE in the semantic structure of English might not be immediately apparent to my readers, so I’ll explain.

In English, the male sex is posited as the norm, the standard; the female sex is that which is non-male (“other”). The set of terms for occupations is a familiar example of how maleness is assumed unless the label is explicitly modified by a female term. Persons addressed as doctor, lawyer, artist, author, engineer, surgeon, sculptor, mayor, jockey, and so on, are assumed to be male unless a special form of the label is used, e.g., woman doctor, lady lawyer, authoress, or sculptress. This is true of all prestige occupations. In contrast, the occupational labels assumed to be inherently female, which require overt modification if the person is male, refer to low prestige, low pay occupations: secretary, prostitute, nurse. When a male holds one of these occupations, he is called a male secretary, male prostitute, or male nurse. Assuming that the male sex is normal and the female sex deviant also underlies the use of pseudo-generic man, men being “the measure of all things,” and the pronoun he as though it encompassed females in its reference. In English, all “persons” are assumed to be male unless otherwise specified. (Lesbians are erased when we allow ourselves to be subsumed under male terms, e.g., homosexual and gay.)

The leftmost, vertical portion of Diagram 1 divides HP semantic “space” into three discrete levels: BIOLOGICAL, FUNCTIONAL, and BEHAVIORAL. I chose this particular order because the internal logic of HS posits an entailment relation between each level: Given that one is (usually) born either MALE or FEMALE (female, from the French femelle, was re-etymologized in the fourteenth century to make it look as though it were derived from male), it follows from this biological trait that one is either MAN or WOMAN in FUNCTION (FATHER or MOTHER), and from this functional description, it follows that one’s BEHAVIOR will necessarily be culturally appropriate to one’s FUNCTION and BIOLOGY–masculine or feminine–in HP terms. If one is born female, then one is also necessarily a woman and, being a woman in this HP culture, one is also necessarily “feminine” and “womanly.” This entailment relation makes the two words synonymous in English, as when “being feminine” is used as though it means `being a woman’. The meaning of being born female in the U.S. is being feminine. A female who is nonfeminine is an unacceptable contradiction in HP terms.

Most heterosexuals, and Lesbians as well, accept as “fact” the description of reality presented by English semantics. They assume that the descriptive limits of English are, in fact, the limits of reality. One is or is not a man; men are the standard of comparison. This assumption was expressed in a television advertisement for a magazine aimed at a female audience, Savvy: “You don’t have to be like a man to succeed in business. You can allow yourself to be a woman.” It’s also the reason some Lesbians are repeatedly addressed as “sir” by heterosexuals. When we present ourselves at restaurants, gas stations, post offices, and other public places, whoever is dealing with us scans us for what they consider “relevant features”: size, weight, height, voice, body posture, clothing, and length of hair. This information gives them a composite sex analysis, and, since they have only two categories, +MALE and -MALE, Lesbians who fit the +MALE composite are going to be addressed as “sir.” They don’t perceive us as Lesbian. They’re matching bodies against conceptual maps. A rock and roll song of the 1960s expressed this operating assumption: “Just two kinds of people in the world.” Likewise, Lesbians who describe another Lesbian as “like a man,” “masculine,” or “mannish” validate HP reality, and prioritize HP values by negating other Lesbians.

At the BEHAVIORAL Level (III), I’ve placed the most commonly used adjectives that describe the behaviors attributed to each sex. The significance of the +MALE/-MALE dichotomy and the rigidity with which HP must maintain it is explicit in Diagram 1 in two ways. First, I’ve included both “real man” and “real woman,” which presuppose “unreal” men and women, i.e., “queers,” as possibilities. This is one of the ways we’re semantically viable, as a presupposition that reinforces heterosexual superiority. In usage, both expressions assume the accuracy of the logical entailments among Levels I, II, and III. If one is female, then one must be a heterosexual and a breeder, and behave in appropriate, “feminine” ways. If she doesn’t, if she fails to symbolically enact (and validate) the logical entailments of Level II or III in some way, she isn’t a “real woman.” She’s “something else” because she contradicts the logic of the HP semantic system. What she is is a Lesbian who defied every effort to turn her into a fembot! Some would call this Lesbian a “butch,” erroneously, I believe (although many Lesbians who did resist feminization have called ourselves “butches” in the past).

Second, the importance attached to these semantic features is exposed by the final pair of terms, womanish/mannish. The usage of both words signals a feature negation (or “violation”) within the system. A man who is described as “womanish” is behaving in some way thought to be “like a woman.” He may cry when he’s angry, frustrated, confused, or grieving; he may cross his legs at the knee; he may bend from the waist to pick something up off the ground. Whatever it is, he is behaving “inappropriately” according to HS. Likewise, a woman described as “mannish” has negated the feature dichotomy by “crossing the line.” She may be aggressive, stoic, or withdrawn; she may wear her hair “too” short; she may be “too” tall, or weigh “too much”; she may take large steps instead of small ones. Whatever the specific behavior interpreted as a negation of her category, the attribute of “mannish” is intended by the user to be both an insult and a warning: Don’t go “too far” or you’re “out.” Semantic violation becomes semantic exclusion; semantic exclusion becomes social ostracism.

HP semantic space is so well maintained that the attempts of some Feminists in the past decade to introduce “androgyny” (or “gynandry”) were bound to fail. First, both terms validate the psychological dichotomy MASCULINE/FEMININE they’re intended to replace. If two distinct kinds of behavior didn’t exist, one reserved for the male, the other for the female, then there would be nothing to combine. Without the pre-existing distinction, no fusion would be necessary or possible. Second, gynandry (or androgyny), as proposed by such Feminists, was operational only at Level III, the Behavioral. They were talking only about personality traits, habits of behavior, as described by HS. Their substitution did not disturb or challenge the entailment conditions between the levels, and it certainly left the foundation, sexual dimorphism, untouched. Finally, trying to promote change “within the system” would work only if they started at Level I, and infiltrated Level III by establishing entailment conditions between the levels. But this strategy, too, is blocked by the adjective pair, womanish/mannish. The derogation of those terms interrupts attempts to blur the distinction carried by masculine/feminine.

In “Lesbian Separatism: The Linguistic and Social Sources of Separatist Politics” (1978), I listed definitions from the first edition of the Random House Dictionary (1967)5 of the words womanly, mannish, and manly, feminine and masculine, then described and analyzed how the very existence of such terms could only be explained by the cultural values they denote and perpetuate. (Words become obsolete only when the speakers of a language no longer want to talk about the ideas or objects the words describe.) I’ll repeat myself here, ask you to read the following definitions, and then tell me femininity is something Lesbians should try to “reclaim.” I hope that reading these dictionary definitions and my analysis of their cultural significance will prompt other Lesbians to realize that we cannot, like Humpty Dumpty, continue to believe that words mean what we want them to mean.6 Words exist and are created because they reflect and inscribe the values and attitudes central to a culture. When they cease to be useful, they become obsolete. Every time a Lesbian uses a word that carries HP assumptions, she is prolonging its existence. As one could predict, the “real meaning” of each word is revealed in the definition of its opposite.

womanly – like or befitting a woman; feminine; not masculine or girlish. Womanly implies resemblance in appropriate, fitting ways; womanly decorum, modesty.

manly – having the qualities usually considered desirable in a man; strong, brave; honorable; resolute; virile. Manly implies possession of the most valuable or desirable qualities a man can have, as dignity, honesty, directness, etc., in opposition to servility, insincerity, underhandedness, etc. It also connotes strength, courage, and fortitude;…

feminine – pertaining to a woman or girl: feminine beauty, feminine dress. Like a woman; weak; gentle.

masculine – having the qualities or characteristics of a man; manly; virile; strong; bold; a deep, masculine voice. Pertaining to or characteristic of a man or men: masculine attire.

mannish – applies to that which resembles man:… Applied to a woman, the term is derogatory, suggesting the aberrant possession of masculine characteristics. (My emphasis)

You’ll notice that the qualities listed under manly and masculine are the “good” things an individual might wish to be: strong, brave, determined, honest, dignified, etc. Notice that not a single one of many negative qualities commonly attributed to maleness is listed here. What happened to qualities like aggressive, violent, narrow-minded, self-centered, defensive, easily threatened, domineering, penis-obsessed, intrusive, predatory, immature, dependent, energy-sucking, or territorial, egotistical, and war-mongering? In which dictionary, do you suppose, one might find those qualities of masculinity listed?

In contrast, the adjectives womanly and feminine are not really defined. Please read them. Don’t assume that you know what you’re going to find there. Look closely at the long list of characteristics in the definition for manly compared to the circularity of the pseudo-definition for womanly: “like or befitting a woman.” That’s not a definition. The real definition for womanly is implied as “oppositions” to “manly qualities”: “servility, insincerity, underhandedness, etc.” Under feminine, we pick up two more adjectives, weak and gentle, and that’s it. Positive attributes commonly associated with females, such as nurturing, kind, and loving, have been omitted. Those adjectives didn’t make it into the dictionary. It should go without saying that, as a theory of personality, sexual dimorphism and the adjectives that express its assumptions ignore the fact that anyone can be strong and gentle. These traits, and others, aren’t “opposites” and, therefore, mutually exclusive; it’s only our acceptance of the HP description of reality that makes them seem so.

Lesbians shouldn’t need to defend “femininity” or feel as though being gentle, kind, tender, interested in fabric and texture, or a host of other personality traits has anything to do with being a female or a “femme.” We can be any and all of these things without subscribing to the HS dichotomy. Similarly, Lesbians can enjoy bicycling, playing softball, repairing cars, riding motorcycles, working in construction, and being hostile to men without calling themselves “masculine” or “butch.” Accepting those labels to describe our predilections is a trap, and it perpetuates HP ideology as though it belonged in a Lesbian context.

The clencher comes when we consider the definition for mannish, “the aberrant possession of’ masculine characteristics,” as though a female who is honest, strong, dignified, forthright, and brave were a freak. Men have reserved the positive attributes for themselves; women are “appropriately” weak, gentle, insincere, servile, and underhanded. Any woman who is honest, forthright, dignified, brave, or resolute is “aberrant,” i.e., mannish. HS logic dictates that those born female who reject the HS dichotomy, who refuse to behave in feminine, “appropriate” ways, are labeled “masculine” by semantic default. Those who aren’t visibly -MALE must be +MALE. This semantic trick makes it seem as though HS has described behavior accurately, but all it does is maintain HP consensus reality at the cost of Lesbian integrity. It’s way past time for Lesbians to stop using HP words as though they were meaningful. Any Lesbian who defends femininity and compares another Lesbian to a man by labeling her “masculine” subscribes to HP “consensus reality.”

The Ways a Lesbian Can Be

The purpose of semantic structure is to create meaning. Without a semantic structure, meaning does not exist. Lesbians aren’t “meaningful” in HS, so we have to construct a semantic system in which we become meaningful. In the U. S., we turned to the only semantic system we knew as a model, Heteropatriarchal Semantics. Even in the 1950s gay community that I came out into, there was a tacit recognition that Lesbians didn’t divide up neatly into “butch” and “femme.” We had to make it up as we went along, and, although the resulting continuum of terms used the HS dichotomy to define its extremes, still a range of behaviors was acknowledged and labeled. Diagram 2 represents this behavioral continuum.

Diagram 2 uses some of the behavioral labels used among Lesbians of my acquaintance during the 1950s and ’60s to illustrate how we expressed our perceptions of the continuum, and many of these terms are still in use among Lesbians today. We constructed a semantics in order to “make sense” of ourselves in HS terms, which ignored our existence. Since it was our denial of the entailment relation between the BIOLOGICAL and FUNCTIONAL levels of HS that defined us as “Lesbians,” we accepted as given the validity of sex-specific behaviors as defined by HS and tried to “fit” ourselves in somewhere. Diagram 2 represents one attempt to construct a coherent, intelligible semantic system for describing perceived differences among Lesbians. Although we recognized a range of behaviors and the purported distinctions were fuzzy (to say the least), we were still bound by the basic dichotomy of HS as an explanation of personality. We used the most general terms, butch and femme, as though they were meaningful to us. We used them to talk about ourselves, to convey information about ourselves that seemed significant in our social context.

Ignored, however, in previous and current discussions of roles among Lesbians is the “ki-ki.” She, along with her label, has disappeared, because our most recent dialogues have focused on the extremes as though one were necessarily either/or. This isn’t accurate historically, and it’s unfair to ourselves in the present.7 I point this out because the term is obsolete as nearly as I can tell. When the Feminist second wave hit the Lesbian shore, ki-ki disappeared because it ceased, temporarily, to be “meaningful” among those Lesbians who became Feminists. (Maybe it’s still used among nonFeminist Lesbians.) The Feminist analysis of heterosexual roles, male oppression, and sexism were adopted by Lesbian-Feminists and applied to the roles of butch and femme, and “sex-roles” among Lesbians became “politically incorrect.” As Joan Nestle pointed out,8 we lost a large part of our past, identities, and our tradition, such as it was. Being proud and honest about our past, however, doesn’t mean its assumptions are or should be viable in the present.

I include the term ki-ki here because it named Lesbians who considered themselves neither “butch” nor “femme.” The “role” they adopted depended upon who they were being sexual with at the time. In so doing, they affirmed the validity of the roles for those who chose them, but refused to make such a choice themselves. They didn’t want to be “limited,” and some of them regarded those Lesbians who were “into roles” as having made a bad choice.

One could be “ki-ki” in the “old days” (scarcely twenty years ago), when dyke and bulldyke (bulldagger among blacks) were strictly derogatory in their usage, within and without the Lesbian sub-culture. The more blatantly “mannish” a Lesbian was in her looks, dress, and behavior, the more negatively charged the label applied to her, by heterosexuals and Lesbians. Calling oneself a “butch” might correlate with one’s physical appearance, including dress, but not necessarily. I knew a lot of “butches” who looked and were very “feminine,” and we called them “nelly butches.” “Butch” labeled their sexual behavior, not their appearance. One self-labeled butch I knew was extremely feminine. Not only could she pass as het, she was, in fact, a call girl, and the mistress of a wealthy man.

Also significantly absent from current discussions is another kind of Lesbian I remember well from the 1950s and 1960s: the Lesbian who didn’t label herself at all. There were Lesbians, even then, who did not call themselves butch or femme or ki-ki. They disapproved of the roles altogether. Furthermore, they looked down on those of us who did role-play, and they said so to our faces. They may have even been a majority of the Lesbian sub-culture back then, or maybe it was 50-50, or maybe role-playing Lesbians were a majority. I can’t quantify that from my remembrances. (Maybe it depended on the bars where one hung out, or whether or not one went to bars. I did know a few Lesbians who frequented the bars I did who refused to conform to the role stereotypes.)

In the late ’60s, along came a female-centered political analysis (at least it claimed to be female-centered): role-playing among Lesbians was “out,” and abandoning role-identified behaviors was “in.” But—-I know, you know, we most of us know—-there is still a large, very large, Lesbian population who rejected Feminism and its analysis from the beginning of its influence among other Lesbians. They said, essentially, “We’re happy the way we are; we have no intention of changing; we don’t want to change, and you (meaning Lesbian-Feminists) aren’t going to make us. Period.” This “dialogue” in the Lesbian “community” was and is still being carried on by only a handful of us. Vast numbers are silent either because they don’t know it’s happening or don’t care.

With the development of Lesbian self-consciousness about the political meaning of our lives, the reclamation of previously derogatory words began, Dyke among them, because it was so negatively charged for us. That this process seemed to move toward the “masculine” end of the continuum is a result of the HP version of reality, not anything inherent in being a Dyke. Given the HS dichotomy, “reclaiming” femininity is irrelevant because it’s essential to HP. If Lesbians want to deny the “naturalness” of HP categories, and assert the positive value of our deviance, adopting femininity doesn’t make any sense. To date, our efforts to use the word Dyke in positive ways, often equating the word with “high political consciousness,” have yet to be taken up by a majority of Lesbians. Other Lesbians say they’re “reclaiming” femme and butch roles for themselves; ki-ki, as I’ve said, became obsolete. We haven’t yet tried to reclaim bulldagger and bulldyke. Maybe there’re good reasons for this even though we haven’t articulated them.

What is the Locus of Lesbian Identity?

How is it that Lesbians, in spite of good intentions, continue to write and read in utterly opposed contexts? Why, for example, was Jan Brown revealing the misogyny she felt when she was a butch (in Out/Look 7:30-34), while Sabrina Sojourner was “reclaiming” femininity (in Sojourner, Feb., 1991)? Up to this point, I’ve left unmentioned two important factors: Political Consciousness and the continuum, Overt… Covert. I think it’s because Lesbians conceive of ourselves in relation to the heteropatriarchy in conflicting ways, depending on whether or not we’re Feminists and, more specifically, the brand of Feminism we’ve incorporated into our value system. I will call this “political consciousness.”

Some Lesbians (I would say most) live within the heteropatriarchy, and would not even name this society as such; they think of themselves as being not so very different from heterosexuals, and so have only rudimentary analysis to account for their discomforts. Others conceive of ourselves as being outside the boundaries of the heteropatriarchy, as being quite different from heterosexuals, and so mistrust any aspect of our thinking and behavior that apes or mirrors the heteropatriarchal world. Lesbians don’t share a “consensus reality”; that is, we have, as yet, no agreed-upon framework within which we make our decisions and evaluate options. We have no self-created description of what it “means” to be a Lesbian in HP, with the result that our valuations of specific kinds of behavior are diverse. Our willingness to challenge HP descriptions varies in terms of where we conceive of ourselves, as Lesbians, with respect to HP society. No Lesbian can ignore HP or pretend that it isn’t there, although many try; none of us can deny its influence in our lives or in the ways we think. To ignore HP or claim that somehow we’ve “gotten past” it in our thinking is to trivialize the damage HP has done to us as Lesbians. These self-conceptions are in conflict each with the other, and they cannot be reconciled. There’s no “middle ground” in this disagreement on which we can compromise, even if we were willing.

For the sake of argument, think of HP society as a circle. At various stages in her development and awareness, a Lesbian positions herself with respect to HP on the basis of her understanding of the meaning of her Lesbian life. Diagram 3 represents six possible Lesbian stances in her acknowledgment of HP: Conservative, Conventional, Humanist, Feminist, Radical Feminist, and Separatist. Each point on this continuum represents an approximate, not an absolute, political position. (I’ve used this terminology because I think it’ll be understood by my readers.)

https://web.archive.org/web/20231009224345im_/https://feminist-reprise.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/06/penelopediag3.jpg

Conservative Lesbians accept HP descriptions of reality as accurate and all-encompassing, and they live as though the givens of HP were unalterable fact. Such Lesbians are usually white, financially comfortable, and living in the suburbs of large cities. In terms of the way they think, they are virtually indistinguishable from their heterosexual neighbors; they don’t think of themselves as “Lesbian,” and most of their friends may be heterosexuals. In spite of the fact that many Conservative Lesbians have never lived as heterosexuals, and must have, at some point in their lives, rejected the essential HP assumption, this fact has no political significance for them. They’re “never-het,” but covert. They believe that the “world” is fine just as it is. For them, no social or personal change is necessary or desirable.

Conventional Lesbians differ from the Conservatives only in that they may call themselves “gay” or “Lesbian,” their circle of friends may consist of like-minded Lesbians and gaymen in addition to heterosexuals, and some—-those who can afford it–may contribute money to “gay” causes as a substitute for active involvement. They may be never-het or ex-het, but their Lesbianism, or “gayness,” is covert.

Humanist Lesbians believe that “we’re all human beings,” and that living as a Lesbian is no different from living as a heterosexual, even though they are aware that HP is oppressive in many ways. The oppressiveness of HP they interpret as some kind of misunderstanding, as though Lesbian oppression will end when heterosexuals understand that Lesbians are “just like” them. The political awareness of Humanist Lesbians may extend to pro-consumer, anti-war, anti-nuclear struggles; they are committed to saving the rainforest, the dolphins, pandas, and all living creatures; they may work as volunteers for AIDS crisis lines or on behalf of the United Way, because they conceive of themselves as having a stake in the outcome of political issues as HP identifies them. Like Conventional Lesbians, they may belong to any economic class. They may be ex-het or never-het, and they may be out as Lesbians or in the closet; neither aspect of their lives is politically significant to them. Their Lesbianism isn’t the essential factor of their identity. Humanist Lesbians will agree that HP is flawed, but believe that all we need to do is make alterations in the social structure, leaving the primary assumptions unchallenged.

Feminist Lesbians have identified themselves with women’s oppression, and they make women’s issues the focus of their political activism. They may, for example, work on rape crisis lines, in battered women’s shelters or abortion clinics, or teach women’s studies. They correctly identify the fact that women are oppressed in this society, and they work actively to struggle against that oppression as they understand it. Most do not, for example, believe that men are the enemy—-only some of them–and they attribute their oppression as Lesbians to their femaleness. They are committed to changing the structure of HP to varying degrees; they question some of the essential values and categories of HP; but heterosexuality remains, for them, an unchallenged given. Lesbian-Feminist consciousness is possible for the ex-het or never-het, closeted or out.

Lesbians who call themselves Radical Feminists position themselves somewhere between Feminist and Separatist Lesbians, on the limits of reality as HP describes it. On the one hand, they identify their oppression as primarily women’s oppression, not specifically Lesbian oppression; on the other they believe that men are the enemies of all women and have developed some of the best analyses of how HP society perpetuates itself and have proposed various methods of destroying “patriarchy.” Although they don’t identify as Lesbians first, they understand the threat that Lesbians pose to HP. They stop just short of identifying “patriarchy” as heteropatriarchy. Separatist Lesbians think of ourselves as living outside HP society (although this is seldom true). Accepting the HP description of Lesbians as outcasts, we have chosen to stand in an antagonistic position to the HP, and it’s Separatists who identify ourselves as Lesbians first and last. Whether never-het or ex-het, Separatists put our Lesbian selves first politically. The essential ingredient of Separatist politics is a rejection of everything vital to the structure of HP, which requires that all assumptions be challenged and examined. Whereas Humanist or Feminist Lesbians believe that behaviors and attitudes can be justified by appealing to the way they feel, Separatists (and Radical Feminists) want to know where these “feelings” originate. We’re not interested in stopping our analysis with how we feel, because appealing to feelings is one way of resisting change. If we’re going to change ourselves and unlearn HP’s version of reality, then we’re committed to examining our feelings and finding out why we have them and where they originate in our experience.

Toward a Lesbian-Centered Semantics

Because Lesbians have different backgrounds and experiences, communication among us will be difficult as long as we use the same words with different meanings and values. But we should not stop arguing with each other. While our debates and discussions continue, though, we need other ways of talking to each other or, at least, explicit acknowledgments that our meanings may be vastly different. We haven’t yet begun to work out our problems with the English language. As the debates about femininity and its effects among Lesbians illustrate, we don’t have a “consensus reality,” and any attempt to construct a Lesbian ethic is often met with arguments based on and fashioned out of HP descriptions of reality. Why are Lesbians so quick to resist Lesbian analysis and defend HP categories? Why do so many Lesbians resist what they derisively call “Lesbian conformity” yet defend their own conformity to HP categories? Where does this reversal originate and whom does it serve? Lesbians? I don’t think so.

For Lesbians who are trying to live outside of or on the boundaries of HP, our attitudes toward and the values we attach to those behaviors have undergone important changes, but the diversity of behaviors observable among Lesbians hasn’t. How are we to manage communication among us in spite of our disagreements? I’ve identified four options (there are probably others):

We can accept the valuation assigned to the MASCULINE/ FEMININE dichotomy by HP, as some Lesbians do, and continue to invest our lives with what those words mean;

We can reverse the valuation made by HP, as do those Lesbians who maintain they can “reclaim” femininity as “positive”;

We can muddle along as we do now, sometimes assigning positive value to “masculine” behaviors, sometimes to feminine behaviors, and sometimes agreeing;

We can reject HP semantics altogether, move further outside the boundaries and terms of HS, and start anew to construct a semantic system of our own.

The first three options are already operational among Lesbians. Whether one values either masculine or feminine behaviors and looks, or neither, positively depends, I think, on where she places herself along the continuum of Diagram 3. This “makes sense,” if one accepts the logic. Many Lesbians have constructed an identity dependent on the terms created and validated by HS; they have an investment in that identity, and any analysis which challenges that identity is suspect.

If my analysis of Heteropatriarchal Semantics is accurate, and if my analysis of how we have revised that framework in order to “make sense” of ourselves is accurate, then emotional health—-thinking well of and feeling good about ourselves-—requires us—-those like me, who wish to change—-to act on option 4: creating a new semantic system for talking about who we are. This is the hardest option of the four. It means we have to think differently about who we are as Lesbians in a world that hates us. (With good reason: a Lesbian who loves herself exposes the arbitrariness of HP consensus reality. If we’re real, then their conceptual framework is flawed, partial at best.)

For starters, I’d suggest that we toss out HP semantics, including masculine and the labels derived from HS, butch and femme. Easy to say, hard to do. I don’t believe we can ignore the label feminine, because so many Lesbians claim that “femininity” is an inherent trait of their “womanhood” and that femininity is a viable Lesbian mode. They still have an investment in HP descriptions of reality. Ideally, in some world that doesn’t yet exist, it should be OK for a Lesbian to don a dress or blue jeans, high heels or boots, decorate herself or not, wear her hair long or short, cut her nails or grow them long; but it’s not. Those aspects of behavior and appearance labeled “femininity” in HP are dangerous for us. We still live in a heteropatriarchy and Lesbians who incorporate male ideas of appropriate female behaviors into their lives signal their acceptance of the HP version of reality. What is more, they will continue to accept preferential treatment at the expense of Lesbians who defy HP authority in order to hold onto our identity.

Lesbians are a sub-culture trying to hold our own within the context of a large, hostile, HP society. Whatever we “choose” to wear, however we choose to look, those choices are likely to be interpreted within the HP semantic system by anyone who doesn’t know us. Somehow, we have to acknowledge the existence of HP categories and their influence in order to unlearn them, without letting that acknowledgment become validation and acceptance of those categories as “true.”

I believe that Lesbian femininity is politically corrupt and degrading, because Lesbians perceived as “mannish”—-and described as “acting like men”—-are shunted aside, marginalized, and trashed by Lesbians who value femininity.

How can we talk about the significant differences among us, the actual range of our observable behaviors, without accepting the assumptions of HP? In the past, the labels butch, femme, and ki-ki served Lesbians as a way of acknowledging and talking about behavioral differences among us, and they still serve that purpose in some segments of the Lesbian sub-culture. But those of us who want to reconceive ourselves in terms that don’t carry with them the assumptions of HS will have to learn to describe ourselves in specific, sometimes lengthy ways that avoid both HS and its values.

In order to do this, we’ll need to start with a radically different description of the “world,” one based on Lesbian experiences and perceptions. Since Lesbians haven’t yet worked out a “consensus reality,” let’s understand first of all that this dialogue is taking place only among Lesbians who are active politically. Let’s find ways to talk to each other in a Lesbian context. (This will enable us to ignore, for example, those conservative, never-het Lesbians who are as Lesbian-hating and misogynist as the heterosexuals whose company they prefer to ours.)

We can make a significant start, as Linda Strega suggested, by valuing Lesbians who rejected and reject efforts to feminize them. We can value our deviance from HP reality, refuse to value Lesbian femininity positively-—because it represents conformity to HP descriptions and values-—and value nonfeminized Lesbians positively. Some of us resist HP training, to varying degrees; others do not, and to varying degrees. HP rewards those who conform to its version of reality; let’s stop privileging HP conformity and, instead, reward Lesbian resisters.

Strega posited that Lesbians must learn to value positively our resistance to HP programming and stop rewarding Lesbians who conform to it. Most importantly, we must stand our ground outside of HP reality, occupy it with determination, and resist efforts to assimilate us and dilute the radical force of our perceptions. Lesbians who “pass” as heterosexuals do so because they don’t want to live openly as Lesbians. Their choice clearly indicates that they value HP approval more than they value their Lesbian identity. A corollary of this is their avoidance and marginalization of Lesbians who cannot or will not pass. And I am weary of being exhorted in the Lesbian and Feminist media to value feminized Lesbians. While I recognize that many Lesbians try to pass in order to survive in HP, recognition of that fact doesn’t mean any of us should value that deception positively or persist in according them preferential status in our communities. The fact of the matter is that Lesbians who pass do so in order to survive better, in economic terms, than those who don’t.

Lesbians who can pass as heterosexuals must understand and admit that they acquire specific social privileges because they can hide their Lesbianism. The privileges and rewards of femininity, in addition to money and social approval, are a false sense of worth and self-esteem because they are grounded in hypocrisy and pretense. Furthermore, Lesbians who prize femininity either believe they are superior to “obvious” Lesbians or they sexualize the difference. In a Lesbian context, FEMININITY = HETEROSEXUALITY = CLOSETED = PRIVILEGE = LESBIAN-HATING. If Lesbians who pass as heterosexuals expect Dykes to condone their choices, as they seem to, they must also recognize that mutual respect is a two-way street. Describing nonfeminized Lesbians as “mannish” or accusing us of “acting like a man” is ignorant, degrading, and insulting. Dykes are accustomed to hearing such descriptions from heterosexuals; we don’t expect or want to hear it from other Lesbians. It discounts our existence and disowns us. The fact of the matter is that we understand the fears and doubts of passing Lesbians, yet they’ve made little or no effort to understand us. Femininity in a Lesbian gives her access to heterosexual privileges, privileges that are tangible: they get better jobs that bring with them social prestige and money. Dykes know all about femininity, what it is, what it means, and the rewards it offers. Because femininity in women is so highly prized by men, femininity cannot be positively valued in a Lesbian context.

Endnotes

1 None of what I say here should be interpreted as referring retrospectively to the Lesbian femmes of the decades before the Women’s Liberation Movement.

2 For example, one of the important differences among Lesbians, and one that most seem to want to ignore, is that between those of us who have always been Lesbians and those who lived and behaved as heterosexuals for long periods of their lives. That single difference—-choosing to act on and live our desires, or choosing to live with/marry a man and bear children—-has profound ramifications for how we behave and understand ourselves as Lesbians. For one thing, that choice frequently results in a class difference: lifelong Lesbians do not have the upward class mobility of passing, ex-het Lesbians, and remain poor and working-class because we can’t get jobs that pay well.

3 I cannot do justice in this brief summary to Linda Strega’s analysis in “The Big SellOut,” nor to the responses to Strega from Paula Mariedaughter and Mary Crane, and I urge readers to seek out the issues of Lesbian Ethics in which the three pieces were published. Strega in particular provides specific examples of the HP attitudes she’s in the process of unlearning with an analysis of why she wants to unlearn them.

4 Consider, for example, Maxine Feldman, who isn’t feminine, who has never tried to pass as heterosexual, who isn’t “pretty” in HP terms, in contrast to the recording “stars” of Olivia Records, who persist in trying to break into the “mainstream” of the music business. They purposely try to pass as heterosexuals, to look like heterosexuals. In fact, most of them refuse to use the L-word from the stage, even at events where they know that a majority of the audience is Lesbian. Such musicians not only betray those of us who are out front as Lesbians, they exploit our desire for a music of our own in a cynical way, using our money and loyalty to them as a means to the financial gains they hope to acquire by appealing to a “broader” audience (i.e., heterosexuals). There is a cruel irony in this: with the exception of, perhaps, Holly Near (if one still thinks she deserves to call herself a “Lesbian”), none of them have succeeded in breaking into the mainstream.

5 A second edition of that dictionary appeared in 1987, but the definitions of these words remained virtually the same.

6 See, for example, the Sept./Oct., 1985, issue of Lesbian Connection, in which a couple of women maintain that they are “Lesbians” in spite of the fact that they fuck men! As one of them puts it: “I have broadened my definition of what a Lesbian is.” Her use of the word broadening is, of course, intended to make readers interpret the statement as positive by opposing it to the word narrow, which has negative connotations in HS (unless it’s used to characterize one’s waistline or hips!). This kind of “broadening” is pernicious, hypocritical, and self-serving-and, besides, simply not possible. Like it or not, a Lesbian has sex with wimmin, not men; heterosexual and bisexual females have sex with men. That’s what the words mean. I have no desire to “reclaim” heterosexuality as a lifestyle, and wimmin who do can’t call themselves Lesbians. I have a personal investment in that word and I won’t have it ripped off or diluted by those whose actions dilute its significance. Another word for broadening is sell-out.

7 With the notable exception of Merril Mushroom in Common Lives/Lesbian Lives 9 (Fall, 1983), 39-45.

8 In her article, “Butch-Fem Relationships: Sexual Courage in the 1950’s,” Heresies: The Sex Issue 12, 3: 21-24.

#language

[vthesims]

https://simminginchi.tumblr.com/post/618280346286424064/clumsyalienns-new-lyla-elle-hairs-in-the

2. https://kamiiri.tumblr.com/post/675222271630196736/femme-fatale-set-here-is-this-months-set-i

3.https://www.patreon.com/posts/penelope-hair-64800204?utm_medium=social&utm_source=pinterest&utm_campaign=postshare&epik=dj0yJnU9SUVqS05QMEVvdXlBVzlVYmN1d1JOeE5QcXlFNzhVd0wmcD0wJm49bnRrTEpLaDZweW5zQVVoRWRMejVvUSZ0PUFBQUFBR1BkSnh3

4.https://aharris00britney.tumblr.com/post/667687031985635328/rowan-hair

5.https://clumsyalienn.tumblr.com/post/691324432996761600/julie-and-cassie-hairs-bgc-all-lods-shadow-maps

6.https://www.patreon.com/posts/lucille-hair-31578879

7.https://dogsill.tumblr.com/post/655256667476426752/olivia-hair-it-reminded-me-of-olivia-holt-in-cruel

8.https://aharris00britney.tumblr.com/post/614133159686242304/susie-hair

9. https://dogsill.tumblr.com/post/679989647005401088/lennon-hair-stream-thank-you-by-lennon-stella-bgc

10.https://dogsill.tumblr.com/post/663591632753541120/jackie-hair-i-had-a-reference-pic-of-jackie-from

1.https://simancholy.tumblr.com/post/687327979416764416/amber-hair

2.https://www.thesimsresource.com/downloads/details/category/sims4-hair-hairstyles-female/title/sasha-hairstyle/id/1598273/

3.https://dogsill.tumblr.com/post/702189684312375296/noah-hairs-made-the-high-school-years-bob-longer

4.https://oakiyo.tumblr.com/post/684177589420556288/sandy-hair

5.https://www.patreon.com/posts/madelyn-hair-46985579

[jjslander]

jj stans are so interesting bc they pick the most heteronormative girl on the show and say 'yes❤️ canon lesbian behavior❤️' when she blinks it's so bizarre to me tell me more about how she's an icon

#emily is literally Right There #and High Femme Penelope #Alex Blake fandom mom hello?? #jjslander #scheduled post

[failbaby]

your god-given solace looks gender-conforming in an excessive, near-theatrical way that reclaims femininity as an expression of lesbianism and makes it unattractive to the heterosexual male eye af

#oc #high femme Penelope rights

[demigodreading]

Meeting The Family

Summary: Another chapter of the Breaking The Distance Series! The team finally solved the case and now the are going to be able to meet Penelope’s girlfriend. (Not gonna lie.. absolutely no idea where the series is going after this. I may put it on a slight hiatus until I can get a clear picture about what I need to do. We shall see).

Warnings: Mentions of drinking 

Characters: Reader, Penelope Garcia, Jennifer Jareau, Emily Prentiss, Tara Lewis, Derek Morgan, Savannah Hayes, Aaron Hotchner, David Rossi, Alex MIller (aka Alex Blake), Spencer Reid

Relationship: Penelope Garcia x Reader, Derek Morgan x Savannah Hayes, Alex Blake x Emily Prentiss 

Word Count: 1220

AO3

Previous Chapter~Next Chapter

------------

It was finally the day. You were going to be meeting the rest of the team. They had returned back from their case and wanted to have a big bar outing to meet you. You had been nervous about it all day but Penelope assured you that they were all going to love you. As you stood over your suitcase figuring out what to wear your nerves started to build again. Masc or Femme? The question ran through your head a thousand times. You know that it truly didn’t matter. Penelope had seen as both and determined that you were just as sexy either way. But you wanted to make a good first impression on the team. They were her family after all. 

You settled on a black crop top with a see-through mesh that you would compliment with a deep burgundy bra. You also pulled out dark high-waisted jeans that stopped just short from the top of your burgundy vans. Since it was a little cold outside you decided to pull on your black and red plaid flannel to complete the look. Dark red lipstick was the only makeup you put on before throwing half of your hair up into a bun. You didn’t know which style you had chosen but at this point, it didn’t matter because when you looked in the mirror all you felt was happy. 

When you stepped into the living room Penelope turned on her heels, “Babe are you…”

A blush came to your cheeks as Penelope began to look you up and down, “That is…oh my… babe you are just… absolutely the most beautiful handsome woman… I love you.”

She brought her hand up to her mouth trying to catch the words that had just escaped. You merely smiled and reached for her hand, “I love you too Penelope.”

The blonde smiled as she grabbed you in for a hard kiss. When you both finally pulled away you were gasping for breath. She placed her forehead against yours letting out a long sigh, “If we weren’t going to be late I would be taking you to bed right now.”

You let out a soft whimper giving Pen another quick kiss, “We could be just a little late?”

“Oh no baby, I want our first time to be damn near magical and that requires more than fifteen minutes,” The blonde said squeezing your hand, “But I promise I will give you all the kisses in the meantime.” You took the agreement and then headed down to the taxi that Penelope had waiting for you. Your nerves started to build again the closer that you got to the bar. Penelope merely kissed your cheek and ran her thumb over the back of your hand.

When you stepped inside the bar a loud cheer erupted from the room. Your cheeks turned a bright red and you slunk slightly behind Penelope. She took your hand pulling you over to where the noise was. She introduced you to every person around the table one at a time. Spencer was the first one to comment on your outfit and the way it perfectly complimented you hair color. Derek needed no introduction and took you into a large hug before showing you to his girlfriend Savannah. She was absolutely gorgeous that was for sure but it was a sore spot in the blonde’s life because it was also the reason that Derek would be making his quick exit from the BAU. His replacement however had begun to bring a lot of joy into Penelope’s life. Tara gave you a kiss on each cheek before JJ pulled you into a breathtaking hug. Emily took you in her arms for the longest whispering a funny joke in your ear that made you immediately relax. Aaron was more soft-spoken and gave you a mere nod before Rossi gave you a glass full of red wine. 

Once all the introductions were done Penelope pulled you into a seat and leaned over to give you a quick kiss. Before she pulled away she whispered in your ear, “You are doing great Y/N. I am so proud of you.”

You smiled at this comment and began to relax as she drew small patterns on your jeans. After you took a couple of large sips of your wine you settled into an easy conversation over the appetizers everyone had ordered for the table. Once the food cleared away people began to disperse throughout the bar trying to wash away as much of the case as they could.

“You make her really happy you know,” Emily said as she slid into a chair next to you.

You smiled watching Penelope dancing with JJ and Tara their drinks high in the air, “She makes me very happy.”

“You both deserve it. Two pieces of sunshine will always find each other.”

You laughed at this comment, “I wouldn’t call myself a piece of sunshine. I would say that light always finds a way into the darkness.”

“See I was trying to explain that to my girlfriend the other day!” Emily said throwing her hands in the air, “She doesn’t believe me though.” “How is… Alex?”

A huge smile spread over Emily’s face, “Amazing. The love of my life actually. That woman can make any day better. Even on the days where she makes me talk about my feelings. Damn linguistics.”

The last comment came with an eye roll that made you laugh again, “Pen told me you aren’t really the talk about your emotion type… which is right up my alley.”

“I knew we would be friends,” Emily winked and turned towards the door, “There is the light of my life! Alexandra Miller.”

Alex smiled as she walked into the open arms of Emily. She gave her a quick kiss before Em talked again, “I didn’t expect to see you.”

“And miss out on seeing Penelope’s girl?” Alex scoffed, “Never.”

Emily drew her lips into a pout, “And what about your girl?”

“Oh baby you know I missed you too,” Alex giggled giving Emily another kiss.

When she pulled away she pulled you into a hug, “Nice to finally meet you Y/N.”

You exchanged a similar comment before you felt someone pulling on your hand. You turned to find your blonde girlfriend with a slight tipsiness to her voice, “Y/N come dance with me! I miss you.”

You giggled saying goodbye to Alex and Emily before rushing out to the dance floor. What felt like hours later you finally stepped off the dance floor to sit down with the rest of the team. Rossi hushed the group for a moment and raised a glass in the air.

“Let me be the first to say this…welcome to the family Y/N!” He said and everyone let out a loud cheer.

You smiled trying to hold back your tears as you looked at all the people who surrounded you. You had never had a family before. Your parents had died when you were young and you had bounced from foster home to foster home until you had turned eighteen. Now as you sat with Penelope’s arms wrapped around you and everyone getting you caught up to speed on inside jokes you finally felt something you never had before. Home.

--------

Maybe one day I will actually remember to put this the first time I post it... yeah probably not

Tags

@vangsn​ //  @xthexsupreme​ //  @ughilovesupergirl​

#Penelope Garcia x Reader #Penelope Garcia #derek morgan x savannah #Derek Morgan #Emily Prentiss x Alex Blake #Emily Prentiss #Alex Blake #aaron hotchner #tara lewis #spencer reid #Jennifer Jareau #david rossi #breaking the distance #breaking the distance series #criminal minds #meeting the family

[whosscruffylooking]

The Purest Things-First Day Jitters (Aaron Hotchner x Female Reader)

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: None.

A/N: There will be a Part 2 to this piece based on S3E10 in order to give some groundwork to the dynamics amongst the team once the reader joins them. Enjoy reading! I had so much fun making this piece. 

The Purest Things Masterlist

au! october 2007

"Criminal profiling is more of an art than a science. Modeling a criminal profile demands the precise marrying of psychological and rational instincts with the crime scene's particulars. What steps would you take in the process of analyzing a suspect to form a solid profile," the stoic BAU Section Cheif asks.

"First, I would want to accumulate all attainable information about the crime to help explain the "how" and "why" of the offense," you counter.

"What kind of information?"

"I'd want to acquire knowledge on the victim to examine the victimology. For example, I'd determine the victim's career and place of employment, friends, family, social status, criminal records, and daily routines and habits. Then, I can look at the connection between the victim and the unidentified subject. Did they know each other, or are they strangers? Why was the victim targeted, and was it them specifically, or are they just one quarry in a tangled web of attacks?"

You look for some signal in Cheif Strauss's attitude as to whether or not you should continue. 

Let’s ramp this up a notch. 

Taking the liberty of doing so regardless, you continue.

"Then, I want to know more about the attacker. I want to classify him...or her, as well as the offense. Why did it take place at a specific location? What is the motive? Is the suspect an amateur or a professional? This collection of data helps to assemble a proper crime assessment. I can now paint the picture of what happened before, during, and after the attack. Next, I can start to hypothesize and formulate a complete profile; I can deduce the kind of person we are dealing with. This assessment includes the age range, social status, what type of career he or she may hold, their I.Q., anything that describes the attacker. Now, I can give the profile to investigators and work to capture the assailant. The profile not only helps track him down but also helps refine the interrogation process."

Pausing the video recording, David sets the remote on the table.

"Academically, she's perfect for the job, Aaron. But will she fit in with the team? She seems too well trained, too straight from the textbook."

"That's why I wanted you to see this next part."

They both watch you in expectation.

"If I may Section Chief Strauss...as much as academic training benefits a student in laying the foundations for their selected career field, all of the studying and laboring over perfect grades becomes virtually obsolete once on the job. Instead, implementing the mechanics and learning through experience, trial, and error is far more beneficial. Executing what you've learned in the real world and refining your expertise in the field is the only way to accurately reveal whether or not you are capable of doing your job."

Rossi snickers at your straightforwardness. Aaron crosses his arms, struggling to fight back the urge to smile.

"Care to expound on that?" Strauss proposes.

"You don't trust the current...organization within the BAU. You feel as though Unit Cheif Hotchner and his team pose a threat to the unit. However, I think you put more emphasis on the chain of command. Specifically, you don't trust Agent Hotchner. In the entirety of this vetting process, you have continually undermined the Unit Chief's role in selecting a new agent. He has not been included in any of our telephone calls. Never once have you cc'd him on our emails. Nor has he been invited to sit in on our in-person interviews. I think the only time I've set eyes on him was in the lobby. He seemed to be completely unaware of my presence and purpose here. I'm sure that were I to be hired TodayToday, I could walk right into his office, and he would be blindsided entirely by my arrival and position on the team. Now, if I am to be apart of this renowned group of individuals, I want to know that I will be a part of it. I do not intend to be an outsider in my field or a pawn for higher-ups' ulterior motives. So, with all due respect Cheif Strauss, I would like to withdraw my application. If any of the aspects that I have touched on prove true and impact my role within this unit, I have no interest in undermining an established team that has no place for me."

Rossi claps Aaron on the shoulder, "She'll do just fine."

**********

You step inside the lobby of the FBI Academy. Although the sight is not new to you after your intense vetting process, it now takes on a new meaning. You have a new purpose. Processing your surroundings, you regard the entryway's clean efficiency. Considering the darkness that looms over this bureau, the lobby is welcoming all the same. 

So this is what my tax dollars have been paying for.

Noticing that an elevator has arrived, you call out to the person inside one of the many lifts. They hold it open for you. The sound of your clipping heels progresses as you run across the glossy tile floor. High heels may not seem like the most logical choice for your first day of work in the FBI, but when wearing them, you feel elevated. As if the world is your stage and you are the ballerina dazzling the crowd in her pointe shoes. Sure, they are uncomfortable at times, but wearing them can almost be considered a superpower. A quintessential accessory of the iconic femme fatale.

The woman in the elevator gasps as you climb on board, startling slightly.

"Are those Jimmy Choos?" She squeals.

You laugh and shake your head, peering down at the patent leather footwear, "No. I wish, though! They're just some old Steve Madden's I got on the clearance racks." Seeing her shoes, you imitate her enthusiasm, "Those are unique! I've never seen a green...quite that color on shoes before."

Chuckling, she thanks you, "Shoes are one of the many ways I express myself. I'm pretty sure at this point I have a pair of shoes in every color for every mood. Today I was feeling a little envious, so I chose this lime green."

"Envious?" You ask.

"There is a Doctor Who convention going on this weekend, and I have meet and greet tickets for the entire cast, but I've been called in on a case. Meanwhile, three of my friends from counterterrorism are on their way to meet David Tennant as we speak. So yes, I am envious."

"Oh my gosh, I heard about that! Catherin Tate is going to be there too. God, what I would give to meet Donna Nobel in the flesh."

"You watch Doctor Who?" Her eyes widen.

You shrug my shoulders, "I'm a bit of a self-proclaimed Whovian."

Shoving her bags underneath her shoulders to free her hands, she stretches them to you, "Penelope Garcia. We are going to be the best of friends."

Taking her hand in yours, you introduce yourself, "I'm Y/F/N/ Y/L/N. I look forward to having a best friend in the building. Today is my first day."

"Oh sweetie, you are going to do amazing," she looks up at the floor number as the elevator dings, "Well, this is my stop."

Stepping off alongside her, you notice her slight surprise. "Mine too," you announce proudly.

"Wait," she whispers, holding a hand up to your face in a stopping motion, "Today is your first day. Oh! Are you the newbie?"

"Today is my first day as a profiler at the BAU, yes."

Stomping her feet repeatedly, she cheers, "Oh, this day keeps getting better! My darling, you will fit in just fine. Now come with me. There's another fellow Whovian I'd like for you to meet."

Following her through the enormous glass doors and into the department, you can't help but feel slightly overwhelmed by the hustle and bustle. "Welcome to the bullpen," she turns around, beaming, "Oh! Spencer, come hither, the new girl is here!"

The young man spins around in his chair and raises his eyebrows, giving you a once-over; he strolls across the office to meet you. You can't tell if he is too tall or too thin. Perhaps, his head is just considerably big for his body, or his lengthy hair gives that illusion. When he nods at you, holding his hand out to greet you, he looks slightly like a little bobble-head doll.

"Dr. Spencer Reid at your service!" He melodically sings.

Nerdy pipe cleaner. I like him.

"It's a pleasure, Dr. Reid. I'm Y/F/N Y/L/N."

"I read you got a full ride through college and graduated from Berkley with a semester completed at the University of Kent for Psychology of Criminal Justice, and you have a degree in Forensic Psychology."

You nod, impressed by his research—time to dazzle him with yours.

"And you, Dr. Reid, attended Caltech. You completed your undergraduate degree at 16, and you hold Bachelor's degrees in Psychology, Sociology, and Philosophy. Very impressive."

"You forgot PhDs in Mathematics, Chemistry, and Engineering," he adds.

You nod, "My apologies."

Breaking a tiny smile, he shifts his gaze to the floor as you notice the light tint of pink shading his cheeks. Unable to resist, you feel the heat rise to yours as well.

"Ah! You must be our newest recruit—Benvenuto nell'esperienza della tua vita," a gentle voice echoes from behind you.

Turning around, you see a familiar-looking, dapperly dressed older gentlemen gliding down the stairs to greet you.

"And you are Agent David Rossi. I attended one of your guest lectures at Berkley three years ago," you reach your hand out to meet his.

"Call me Dave, and you can thank me for inspiring your career choice later. Right now, we have a case. It looks like it'll be a first day via baptism by fire for you kiddo," he lifts his thick eyebrows and winks at you. David motions for you to follow his lead, and you eagerly journey behind him.  

In the conference room, you are met with the eager faces of four other new colleagues. The first to catch your eye is the herculean adonis, whose attention fixates on you. You watch as his eyes scour you top to bottom, taking your whole body in.

Four words. Sculpted by the gods. Where has he been all my life?

"Where have you been all my life?" The statuesque man purrs, running his thumb across his bottom lip.

Ha. Jinx. You can buy me a drink anytime.

"Hiding from men who lead an introduction with that," you strut over to shake his hand. A knot swirls in your stomach as your finger-tips touch, but you quickly dismiss it as mere infatuation.

Throwing his head back in laughter, he responds, "I like you already. Derek Morgan."

"It's nice to see you again," the bright, blue-eyed young woman you recognized as the media liaison smiles, "I'm Jennifer Jareau, but you can call me J.J." On the day of your first interview with Strauss, she offered you directions to the Section Chief's office.

Next, Agent Prentiss introduces herself. Her thick, raven-colored hair elegantly falls to her shoulders and encompasses her diamond-shaped face. There is a spirited as well as clever expression in her eyes.

Finally, Agent Hotchner stands up. You are taken aback by his astute and severe manner. He's taller than you recall, although you have only observed him from afar. Like most men, he seems to have become an automaton of the modern workplace, measured and valued just for his productivity and obedience. He is tense, most likely swallowing intense trauma and concealing it so he can get up each day and do the same tedious job again and again. Most men display these traits in the way they parent, becoming domineering companions, stacking decay over destruction until their home-life collapses. What remains is a mass of bitterness resentment.

Yet, he exhibits none of this. Beneath this rather tough exterior, you can discern that he is the kind of handsome that infiltrates your bones, that exudes an air of olden times before he's even said a word to you.

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[theblackberrygirl]

The BAU As Kids in My English Class

Because I’m on a Zoom and I’m bored.

This is kinda long so I’m gonna cut the post.

Hotch: Will, he’s OBSESSED with WW1 and WW2. He wears a pressed suit complete with a tie and dress shoes EVERY DAY WITHOUT FAIL. Plays the saxophone, randomly. Does not know how much hair gel is acceptable.

Derek: Adam, plays literally every sport the school offers. Football, baseball, basketball, boy’s volleyball, he even goes up to the high school to play for their golf and swim team. Super nice guy, and oddly enough he’s in the Baking club and Knitting/Crochet club?? He’s well rounded I guess

JJ: Ally, popular girl. Which extracurriculars are you doing? Yes. Istg she’s in every single club except for like, 3. She can be a bitch sometimes, but for the most part she’s nice enough. She has a tendency to look down on the ‘uncool’ kids (orchestra, theatre, academic team, History club, library aid, etc). Hates to admit that she’s getting tutored by a girl in all of those (that would be me.)

Alex: (is it narcissistic to say myself?) Student librarian, daycare worker, tutor. Does not have any idea when someone is crushing on her. Completely and totally oblivious. Someone could say ‘I’m in love with you and want to marry you’ and she would still think it was platonic.

Elle: Avery, absolute badass. Carries a knife strapped to her thigh (I’m not joking). Skateboards to and from school. In class, she’s very quiet, but not shy. Falls on the older side of the class. She likes to joke she’s the ‘guardian demon’ to the younger kids of the school and I’m the ‘guardian angel.’

Penelope: Abby, theatre geek. Baking club, painter’s club, technology club, and one of the few band kids that doesn’t take every opportunity to shit on the orchestra kids. Friends with literally everyone, and it’s an ongoing mystery if her and Adam are dating (I still don’t know)

Emily: Maddie, soft femme goth. Black skirts and fishnets, black lipstick and heavy eyeliner. Orchestra kid, does not give a flying fuck about what people think of her. She’s nice to people who deserve it. I have been low-key crushing on her since the 5th grade. Rollerblades to and from school. Has been trying to teach me how to do it but I have 0 balance.

Spencer: Annie, omg I finally get to talk about my prodigy child. Annie’s 11, skipped 2 grades. Very small for her age, shorter than everyone in the school. She is my chaotic disaster child and I love her. Is protected by Avery, Maddie, Adam, and me. She comes to the library with me sometimes when I’m on shift.

Ian Doyle: TRUMPIE BEDSHEET BOY. Does not know when to knock it off, will never leave Maddie (Emily) and I alone. It’s rumored that he’s been crushing on Emily. Has a tendency to turn violent. Likes to taunt Annie to fuck with my head on occasion. Fuck him.

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