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#and Im kinda in a so Im not in best mind space
vamptastic · 1 year
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i think my constant seething rage is honestly very reasonable. i literally live in florida.
#got in argument with a guy the other day abt idk. trans athletes#was basically him trying to explain what the issue is to me (i know. that's kinda step one to having an opinion on it.)#and then going yeah huh i guess you're actually right (i was)#and i was like okay great cool we're done here let me go to class and he starts talking about like#how he still loves trump for this and that reason kinda unprompted (sorry you lost an argument dude go introspect somewhere else im LATE)#and i was like yeah idk abt that. on account of all the corruption. and the foreign policy youre saying is like manly macho man strong is#mostly just wildly stupid posturing that's going to achieve nothing at best and world war at worst#and he goes no don't worry i think DESANTIS would be better for 2024 actually#and i. UNDERSTANDBLY. was like oh okay i cannot speak to you (because i am visibly shaking with rage)#and he goes well i think you are misattributing my intentions (cunt.)#and i said no no i don't think you're malicious i just think you're stupid and wildly misinformed#and then left bc i was about to either hit him or start crying (bc that guy has been like very tangibly ruining my life for months#and i genuinely cannot fathom what fucking tax issue or whatever one would value over like. my right to idk. Exist atp.#and also this coming from someone who just tried to be like no i know so many trans people i love trans ppl im not like those conservatives#like try to dig deep down into whatever rotted husk of a brain is left in your skull and fathom why i might have a strong reaction to your#support for DESANTIS and the SPACE LASERS WOMAN#you fucking idiot.)#and was that civil. No. and now i have to apologize to him bc i feel bad about it even though i fully meant it#idk its what i get for trying to change peoples minds with stupid things like#' statistics ' and ' a utilitarian perspective ' and ' existing legal basis for my argument '#guys so wrapped up in their right wing bubble they just dont wanna hear it#n they always assume i mustve not heard their talking points and its like look at where we fucking live#and look at the state of the world. NOBODY in any form of mainstream news shares my politics lmao#you think i havent heard every conceivable argument abt trans people??? also you think im dumb enough to form an opinion without looking at#the other side? yeah man i know about the three trans women who have ever won a sports competition ever. do you?#do you even know their fucking names or sports or trial outcomes.#GOD just fucking. pseudo intellectual facist horseshit like pragru and infowars masquerading as legítimate sources#are making so many dumbass illiterate (i truly don't think they have the reading comprehension to decifer a study or even long article)#guys think they're gods gift to politics bc they listened to someone else tell them what a source says through ten layers of propaganda#just. uh. everyone should die forever and also learn to read.
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mrfoox · 10 months
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Uh. Like month... 4... Without an big breakdown and im 😳 what.... Wha
#miranda talking shit#I always say this but holy shit what the fuck i didnt think medication could have so much impact#I thought be being numb would be the best case. But here i am like 👍 life's not so bleak. I have loved ones. There's more for me to see#Like what the fuck.... Ive been sucidal since i was 11... I thought that would just be permanent for me... That it would kill me one day#But here i am just.... Like...living?#I mean im still not living life to the fullest mainly bc im still not used to just ... Be and not feel like garbage#I still have many problems and inner battles but they don't .... Send me into the abyss or worse#Anti medication people can probably argue if im ACTUALLY happy or just high of my meds or something but i...#I just feel like myself but ...kinda like when you put on glasses after being without them for a while#You see things clearer again and you had forgotten that your eyes were bad#I see the same things who would make me smile for 1 second. Now i see them and they make me smile for half a minute or more#I feel i think a lot more and notice smaller things. Smaller delights. A little cute bug flying by. An pretty flower outside. Someone#Laughing with their friend. A child playing outside. They all make me happy now and i just ... Yeah.#I am not the most positive person alive or am super happy all the time... But having actual ... Normal days#Actually be just... Just fine. Not 'i have managed to not cry and kept my mental health in check somewhat etc' but actually just#Things are fine. On an scale more in tune with others version if fine. Im used to my okay days just being like... Oh i was awake today#I ate a meal today. I didn't cry. But i still had my usual bad mental space but it was fine bc it was a bit more manageable#That was a fine day. Now I'm like... Id describe my days now as great days. I usually have one or two of these days#Per year ... Now i have them like daily... Theyre just fine. It blows my mind...#Ive always been positive to medication despite not finding one that helped me as much as i... Wanted. But now it's like#Holy shit yeah. Wish i found this medicine at age 15 when i started and not 10 years later but man im glad i finally found it#So glad i decided not to just settle with the one i had. When i brought up i wanted to try new medication again#Doctors were like what... But why? And it's like.... Yeah that one i had was.... The best i had found at the time and i had kept it for 3#Years. But it did only help me to stabilize some. I still felt like garbage... And explaining that to a doctor is like... Idk how to do that#Like id say my old medication helped 25% i know it helped mostly with my general anxiety. But it wasn't like to a point i felt#It was a GOOD medication for me. Just ... It was the best i had tried so... It was fine...
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rain-loving-fox · 8 months
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i just realize how much i would suck to be around in a pool. not because im melancholic or some shit. no. i will pass the swim test and chill in the 8ft section only to drop down and chill until it gets to a concerning point and make the faves panic, only for me to coincidentally rise back to the surface
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hearts4sturniolo · 2 months
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FRIENDS -m. sturniolo
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PAIRING; fwb!matt + fwb!reader
CW; smut. pure filthy smut. matts dick game kinda crazy?? dominance. a fuck ton of teasing and begging. praise + a little degration tbh. this ones a long one so bare with me.
AUTHORS NOTE; first tumblr fic, WHO UP! lmk if this is dog ass bc i am open to criticism lol. also comment if u wanna be in the taglist, shoutout gf @americanjcsus for being #1 hypegirl through this process lol.
its friday night and i found my feet carrying me to a door i knew all too well. the home of my best friends. im not even sure if i can consider one of them that anymore, because deep down i know its more.
i ring the doorbell and wait patiently, hearing footsteps on the other side. a hand hit the knob as the door swung open to reveal chris.
"dude this is perfect timing, i was just about to head with nick to mcdonalds so you made it just in time." chris said stepping forward for a swift side hug.
"you mind getting my usual? oh and also an oreo mcflurry please?" i asked while reaching down to take off my shoes.
"yes ma'am, NICK LETS GO!" he shouted, as if on cue, nick came strolling down the hallway.
"hey bae! i didnt know you where coming over tonight?" nick said, pulling me into a bear hug. i wrapped my arms around him, hugging him just as tight.
"nick its friday... where else would i be." i joked as the two laughed before stepping outside for their mcdonalds run.
"do you wanna come with? if not i think matts rotting in his room if you care to join him." chris said
"im good, ill just go bother matt." i said, knowing that i would be doing the exact opposite the second they left the house. chris just nodded before closing and locking the door, leaving you standing in the entryway.
i ventured my way through the house, my brain going into autopilot as i made my way to matts room. the door was closed, dim light leaking from underneath the crack in the doorway. i knocked softly before opening the door.
matt was currently sprawled out, back against the headboard of the bed, legs parted just enough for someone to to fit in-between them.
holy fuck, i thought to myself. he was wearing red plaid pants and a black tight fitting tee shirt. his tattoos visible and his hair tousled.
"hey sweetheart." matt said, patting the space next to him in the bed, insinuating for me to come sit next to him.
i practically stumbled towards him, crawling onto the bed to lay on my stomach next to him. my head resting on my palms as i looked up at him.
"nick and chris left?" he asked, glancing at my figure before regaining eye contact.
"mhm." i responded, his hand immediately reaching out to stroke my cheek. i melted into his touch as he scooted closer.
"i've missed you pretty girl, been thinking about you all week." he spoke in a low tone, goosebumps rising up on my skin as he pushed my hair behind my shoulders.
"what have you been thinking about?" i responded. i knew the answer to this before i even asked, but i wanted to hear it.
"well, i've been thinking about how you were teasing me the other night at dinner, how you thought you were slick rubbing my thigh knowing i wouldn't be able to do shit to you because you were going home after." my eyes widened, i had silently prayed he forgot about that, but at the same time, i wanted to know the aftermath. he pushed himself onto his arm, leaning over me now, hand still caressing my face
"been thinking about your pretty lips, those sweet noises that i want to hear come out of them while i fuck you." the sweet sentence turning into one filled with lust. it was like he was teasing me at this point.
"oh, and how good you would look with my dick filling you up." he said so casually that i almost passed out. i couldn't take much more, i reached up to thread my fingers through his hair before pulling him into me. our lips smashing together before we could even think of anything else.
he immediately sprung into action, his lips moving roughly against mine. his tongue poking out to push past my lips and into my mouth. i moaned a little bit at the action as his tongue roamed around my mouth with purpose. after a moment, his lips retracted from mine, making their way down to my neck.
he licked a long stripe up my neck before sucking harshly, making multiple dark marks on my skin. his hand trailing its way to my shirt and crawling up my back to unclasp my bra like he has so many times.
"take your shirt off." he mumbled against my skin, i shot up to peal my shirt off before he did the same with his own. his tattoos now much more visible as he leaned to grab my lower back, pulling me closer towards the headboard of the bed.
he leaned down towards my neck again, slowly kissing hungerly down towards my chest. he blew a cold breath onto my nipple while looking up towards me.
"matt." that's all i could say, my mind was racing because of how slow this all felt like. he was taking his time to tease me but doing so passionately to keep me hooked.
"tell me what you want, baby." i stayed silent as my back arched, trying to get his mouth connected to my skin. his hand roughly pushed me back down.
"your such a slut, i've barely touched you and you're already speechless. now you either answer, or i stop." he propositioned
"matt please, just- i need you so bad. want you to touch me" i whined, skin starting to ache from the lack of contact.
without a second to spare, he leaned down and connected his mouth to my chest. my hands shot to his hair again as he sucked on my nipple. quickly after, giving my other boob the same treatment before sucking on the surrounding skin. matt was completely unbothered as he made more dark marks, that only we knew would be from him.
his hand slid down my waist and onto the waistband of my shorts. hooking his finger onto them, he slowly traced the top.
"please, please matt." i begged, pleading with him to touch me where i needed him to most.
he listened, hand tugging down my shorts and panties in one motion. he looked at me before looking down, hand inches away from my pussy.
"god you're soaked baby," he said, whimpers exiting my mouth as he ran one finger up my slit. he asked before placing his finger on my clit "you want me to touch you right here?"
"god yes please matt-" i was cut off by my own moan. matts finger making quick work to my puffy clit. he pulled his finger off only before he switched to his thumb. he rubbed in a circle before his middle finger teased the outside of my hole.
he spared me the words before pushing a single finger into me. my moans quickly filling the air in his room as he took that as a sign to add another finger.
"you're clenching around my fingers so well, my good girl." the name almost causing me to cum on the spot. he continued the pace, pushing his fingers in and out of me as i barrled towards my orgasm.
"matt- im gonna cum-" i spoke, panting heavily and bucking my hips up into his fingers.
matt immediately pulled his fingers out of me before making quick work to unzip his own pants. i whined at the lack of contact he moved off the bed, tearing his pants off his ankles.
"come here baby, come show me how bad you want me." he spoke, voice low and gravelly. i crawled over towards him and positioned myself so that i was on my knees, hand instinctively going to palm him through his briefs.
"fuckkk, my god." he hissed, head falling back on his shoulders and his hand shot out to grab the one that was touching him. he guided my hand to the waistband and nudged me to take them off.
i pulled them down and his cock sprang out, hitting his bare stomach and leaving a small precum spot against his skin. he was painfully hard and his tip was practically leaking. i swiped my thumb over his tip to collect some of his cum before bringing it up to my mouth to suck on it, doe eyes looking up at him.
his demeanor shifted and his eyes were filled to the brim with lust as he quickly turned me over and pushed me down onto the bed, chest against his soft grey sheets as my lower half was vulnerably out in the air.
he came to stand behind me, before i knew it, i felt his dick slide up my folds. i gasped, lips parted slightly as i waited his next move.
"matt fuck me please." i begged, pushing my hips back against him
"only since you asked so nicely baby." he said before pushing his entire dick length inside of me. i choked on a moan as he slowly and deeply thrusted into me.
"gotta make sure you get every inch, you deserve it." he mumbled, low grunts coming from him as he ever so slightly quickened his pace.
his hand made their way to my hips, helping guide me back against him. his dick hitting my g-spot with every thrust. the sounds coming out of me filled the room. i knew that if anyone else were home, they would know exactly what was happening, there was no denying it.
he pulled me back harder against his cock as he started to ram into me at an ungodly pace. one of his hands leaning over to push my head into the bed, my cheek smushing against it.
"you're mine, thats it, you understand that?" matt spat
"yes matt. yes, yes." thats the only words that i could form. brain fogging up as i was being fucked dumb by my best friend.
"good girl," he grunted, my pussy clentched around his dick as i chased my orgasm. "my good girl, you're so tight for me and only me."
my only sounds switching between moans and heavy labored breaths as he fucked me.
"fuck baby- im so close- wanna fill you up." he mumbled again. pounding me at an even faster rate as he reached down with the hand that was on my waist, to rub my clit in circles.
"please- please matt," i pleaded, high so close i could almost taste it. "cum in me."
with that, i felt his dick twitch and a warm liquid filling my pussy. the feeling alone causing me to cum all over his cock, our juices mixing together.
he slowed down his pace but continued to fuck both of us through our orgasm. much more loud grunts now coming from him as his sensitive dick twitched more frequently inside of me, sending shocks through my body.
after a moment, he slowly pulled out of me, guiding me to lay down onto his bed as he pulled his underwear back on to make a quick trip to the bathroom. he came back seconds later with a wet and dry towel, helping clean myself and then himself up.
time moved so fast that it felt like the next second, he was throwing one of his shirts over my head and pulling the blanket up after climbing into the bed next to me.
i could barely keep my eyes open as i saw him looking at me, "you did so good sweetheart, come here." he pulled me towards him. i smiled into his chest as i spoke next.
"thank you." i blushed, eye contact so prevalent now that it made my heart ache. my face felt hot as he played with my hair, finding something to put on tv while we waited for his brothers to get back. my heart ache spreading to my whole chest now. only one thing plagued my mind in that moment.
it was that im not sure how much longer we could be just "friends".
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mushies-stories · 2 months
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Mates 18+
GhostXSoapXF!Reader
Summary: Alphas Simon and Johnny come across you during your heat. they take you home and show you they have wanted you, just as much as you want them.
Warnings: 18+ smut, 98% porn 2% plot, ABO, double penetration, fingering, oral (both kinda), unprotected sex, mating, creampie's, knotting. readers an omega but I kind of hardly reference it, I think?
Word count: 7661
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It wasn’t more than twenty minutes after putting your immediate request for leave in when the first waves of heat started to hit you. Your body was warming and your pussy was getting wet at the smallest sensation. Hastily you grabbed the few things you knew you'd want from your bunk at home and headed down the hallway. Your steps were fast and you were almost put at ease, that was until you smelt the all too familiar scents of Soap and Ghost. It wrapped around you and filled your head with absurd thoughts. You whimpered a little to yourself as you continued walking, hoping he would be gone by the time you made it to the front door. 
To your dismay it looked like they didn’t plan on moving, efficiently blocking your exit. Only way out was to go past them. Of course out of the entire building full of mostly betas, it's Ghost and Soap who are in the way of your freedom. The two Alpha’s here that have the strongest effect on your body and mind. You decide to wait behind a pillar. Waiting for them to be gone first was your best option or you might just collapse in the parking lot. 
Moments pass and their scent has only gotten stronger. What was your worst fear suddenly coming true when Ghost pops out from around the corner. His eyes show concern as he looks down at you. “Ya okay love?” he asks. Truthfully, he knew the answer to that, they both could smell you the moment you entered your heat. What you also didn’t know was Ghost that had been eyeing you for a while now. The sweet little omega who looked up at him with big eyes, always showing how willing you were to submit to him. He fisted his cock so many times at the thought of knotting your little hole and now seemed like the best opportunity. 
He didn’t want to push you. No, he wanted you to tell him, beg him. He knew his scent had an effect on you, knew it would be hard for you not to ask him to help. You’ll be so needy. He sees the way you look at him and his partner. Watching them while they work out together or are fresh from a shower and soap refuses to put a shirt on. 
You looked up at him with wide eyes. There was a light blush to your cheeks and stumbled over your words. “Ye-yeah… im fine just umm.. Not feeling well.” You tell him to avert your eyes to the ground. His gaze was too much, you felt so warm under his stair.
“Ya look like you're about to collapse love, let me take ya home.” He insisted, gently reaching a hand out to touch your arm. Even through the fabric of your hoodie your skin tingles where he held you.
You gave him a quick glance with a small sheepish smile. “That's okay… really I can get home on my own.” your voice was still so shaky, uneven enough for you to feel embarrassed. 
“Bonnie, really should just let us take ye home.” Another voice chimed in on your other side. Soap was leaning against the other side of the pillar, looking down at you with a crooked smile. 
You can't help the wide stare you give him. Both of them being this close to you, enveloping you in their scents by towering around you had your head swimming with lustful ideas. You blink and avert your gaze once again. They were your superiors and you were becoming so dazed with need just standing there in an open space. You didn't want to think about how you’d act in the small space in a car.
“Really it-” 
“Y/N.” Ghosts commanding voices cut you off. You raise your eyes to meet him, looking up at him through your thick lashes. His gravelly voice sent chills up your spine, the authority in it making you falter. The sight alone makes me want to push you against the wall and fuck you dumb. “Let’s go, don't need ya crashing and dying trying to get home.” he says. 
“What he said, Dove. Just want to make sure ye make it home safe.” Johnny agrees with a nod of his head. 
You let out a little sigh and nod back. “Okay.” You concede. 
With a hum, Ghosts leads you to the front door, hand on the small of your back to keep you straight. Johnny opens the back door for you and gestures for you to get in. they both took the front, leaving you to suffer in peace in the back seat, taking the spot behind Ghost. With your address in, the drive begins. You looked out the window, a way to distract yourself from the two alphas chatting and bantering in the front. They seemed to be fine letting you take the time to relax and didn't seem to mind when you cracked the window. Anything to help dilute the air that was swirling with a mix of your arousal and the alphas. 
You knew they had to smell you, knew this was more than just a simple cold or flu. You weren't sick. But so far neither of them have said anything, instead they help their own conversation while Ghost drives. Rather slowly you notice and he was taking back streets. You were starting to squirm in the back and it was a little hard to breathe normally. You still felt so hot and was only getting worse as the minutes went by. 
“Hey, stop over there.” Soap points out a little convenient store. “Gotta get a few things.” he says. 
You felt a sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach as you pulled into the lot. “Hold on… I really don't feel well, maybe stopping isn’t the best idea right now?” you try to chime in. 
With the car now parked, Ghost looks at you through the mirror as Soap hops out with a chuckle. “Why, making a mess back there?” he taunts suddenly. “Yer little pussy can wait a bit longer, can't it?” he asks, a brow raised under his mask. 
Your knees draw closer together. His words send more waves of heat to your core. He seemed perfectly fine ignoring it before… but his words are so straight forward and dirty. You give him a little nod and look back down at your lap. “Yes sir…” you mumble. Embarrassment flooding your face.
“Good girl.” his deep, gruff voice paired with the simple praise had you choking back a whimper. 
What you don't realize is just how hard it really is for the pair to not climb in back and fuck you. How badly their cocks twitch when they take a deep inhale of your scent. A few very long, excruciating minutes later and Soap is jogging back to the car with a gleeful smile and a bag in hand. Then you were back on your way to solitude. 
Another ten minutes and you're pulling up to your flat. You give Ghost a soft thank you before reading for the door handle, only to be stopped by his commanding voice telling you to wait. You watch confused as he gets out of the car and opens your door for you, reaching a hand out for you to take. “I'll walk ya in, you look a little stumbly, love.” he says. 
You gently place your hand in his, he tightens his around yours and pulls you a little to stand outside of the car. “I can manage on my own, I swear.” you try to tell him. 
He shakes his head and places a hand on the small of your back, dangerously close to your ass. “Oh yeah? Go on then, walk little pup.” he urges you forward with a firm press to your back. 
Your knees buckle, everything they do makes you weak and want to get down on your hands and knees for them. Soap is rounding the front of the car and opening his arms to grab you when you feel like you might really buckle to your knees. 
“Oh no Bonnie girl. See, just let us help ye.” he scoffs with a chuckle then scoops you into his arm, effortlessly cradling you in his arms. You let out a soft yelp and cling to his body, arms grabbing his shoulders as he begins walking into your building. 
This isn't good, you thought. He was so close, too close. You were pressed so firmly against his chest. “Soap… I can walk.” you try protesting again. His scent was filling your lungs, your mind and your cunt were dripping from it. Ghost also followed, his scent never faded and you could make out the rustling of a bag. 
“And miss getting to see such a sweet little omega falling about in her heat?” he grins down at you. You can hear Ghost chuckle behind him. “What floor dove?” he asks in front of the elevator.
“9th, apartment 902.” your voice is quiet, face a steaming red by now. Fighting him on id didn’t seem like it was going to get you anywhere. All the teasing and touching was starting to really affect your mind, and judgments. You don’t understand why they were teasing you now, all you knew was it wasn’t helping. The way they looked at you, talked to you. It was making your head spin. The elevator ride was the hardest part so far, being held against Soap while both Alphas crowd the space around you. You have to force yourself not to snuggle into Soaps chest. At your door he doesn't set you down, instead of trying to fight it you just unlock the door and let the brute sized man bring you inside. “Cute place.” He says as he walks you all the way to your bedroom and sets you down on your bed. 
Ghost looms in the doorway, watching you and Johnny. They had talked about this more than a few times, both had admitted to having feelings for you a while ago and figured that sharing you, being together with you would be ideal. They were already inseparable so why not share an adorable little omega, one as sweet and perfect as you?
Soap sinks down to his knee in front of you. His hand comes up to hold your thighs. “Anything we can get ye pup?” he asks, with a sweet smile and a little glint in his eye. Your skin was on fire, his hands were so big as they gently rubbed against your thighs. Even through the fabric he could feel how warm you were. The little whimper you could no longer hold in comes out, small and whiney. Soap’s sweet smiling face turns into one of concern, or at least that's what he wanted it to look like. It was hard to hold back the smirk. “Bonnie, ye okay?” he asks, hands now gripping a little into the plushness of your thighs. 
You nod and look between the two before lowering your gaze once again. “M’fine… just um.” you want to tell him that his hands are making your brain short-circuit. You also want to beg him to rip your clothes off and stuff you with his cock. 
“What is it lovie?” Ghosts' voice draws your eyes back to look at the two of them. You open your mouth to say something but the shame forces you to close it. Both men noticed the way your thighs instinctively rub together though. Your rosy cheeks and glossy eyes. You were just too scared to ask, to dumb from your heat to read the room. Ghost thought, just this once he would take it easy on you. Since it will be the first, first of many heats to come. He had time to tease you later. “Johnny makin yer little cunt drool, that it pup?” he speculates. 
The answer was written on your face. You slowly nod your head. The need to be filled finally overshadows your embarrassment for just a moment. Enough for you to let out another shaky whimper and flutter your pretty lashes at the alphas.
Both men hold back groans. Slowly Ghost strides into and across the room until he's taking the open space to your right. Your shoulder is pressed against his chest. The two alphas invade your space completely. “Use yer words pup.” he instructs. His voice makes your body tense a little, deep and gravely.  
You let out a soft sigh. “Yes s-sir.” you confirm. 
“What do ya need from us, love.” Johnny asks, bringing your focus to him. 
You shift a little under his leering eyes. You fight logic in your head, even in heat they would leave you a mess. You wanted it so bad, your whole body ached for them to touch you, please you. It was starting to feel unbearable how much your pussy craved them. “Need…” you think the words over one last time. You needed them and it was too late to run. “Need to be fucked… please, It’s to much.” you manage to whimper out. 
Your big pleading eyes make Johnny's cock leak with pre cum, his cock struggles against his cargo pants. Him and Ghost share a look. They have waited to long for this, for you. “Need us to make ya feel better Bonnie?” he coos. His hands travel up your hips to your jeans. “Need yer Alphas to fuck’ye all better, that it little pup?”
“Yes sir.” you say, just barely remembering what Ghost said about using your words. 
Johnny chucks as he hooks his fingers into the waistband and tigs them down past your ass. Your little gasp makes him smirk a little more. “Johnny, dove. That's the name you’ll be begging for to make you cum.” he says with a toothy grin. He yanks the rest of your jeans down and tosses them aside, leaving your bottom half in just your panties. His calloused hands grazed against your now exposed flesh, making your breath hitch in your throat. 
You never would have thought in a million years you would ever be this exposed to either of them. Let alone both… at the same time. Not like this at least. Not with you a sopping mess for them, their bodies crowding your own and touching your body so intimately. You dreamed of this, taking both of them and now it's becoming a dream come true. 
You looked up at Ghost, wondering what he wanted you to call him. You were ready to assume he would prefer to stick with Sir, or Ghost.
He surprises you. 
“Simon, lovie. Better know it because you aren't going anywhere.” he growls. It wasn't scary, rather, possessive sounding. A hand trailed around your neck from behind, keeping you in place. He didn't apply any real pressure, just let his fingers graze over your sensitive gland. Your body shivers. Ghost… Simon wanted to mark you, him and Johnny as their own. You give him a needy whimper at the implication. He chuckles in response and raises his free hand to the bottom of his mask. At the same time Simon is pulling his mask above his nose, Johnny is pulling your legs apart and nuzzling his face between them, kissing and nipping at the soft skin of your thighs. You grip the sheets beside you, needing something to ground you a little.
Your body reacts to Johnny, shaking and jerking at every shark nip on your delicate skin. Your eyes are focused on Simon's lips. They were a little scared from battle, but that just made them more enticing. You wanted to feel them, taste them. Simon noticed the way your eyes are trained on them, your own lips pouting softly. Johnny works his way closer to your core, leaving little purple marks along his way. Then Simon is leaning in, holding your head still as he places his lips gently to yours. For Simon, he was being annoyingly slow and gentle, but he wanted to tease you as much as he could before his cock needed to be in you. You whimper into the kiss, melting instantly against him. His lips are a little rough but completely overpowering. 
Johnny takes the opportunity while you're distracted to tease your clothed cunt. Almost like he was going to take a bite out of you, his teeth rake over your throbbing core before placing a sweet kiss to it. Your hips jerk against him and when you gasp against Simon's lips he uses the advantage and slips his tongue into your mouth. Johnny slides your panties down in one fluid motion. His hands slide down to grope as much of your ass as he can get and slides back between your thighs, letting your legs hang over his shoulder. 
Simon pulls away to watch your pretty little face crumble when his partner's tongue flattens against your cunt and licks up your slick, tasting you and groaning against your heat. He chuckles and places a hand on your stomach to help keep you still while Johnny starts lapping at your cunt. “Awe lovie, ya look a little warm.” You nod dumbly at him, Johnny's tongue killing any to form whole words. You were burning and your body was already covered in a sheen of sweat. He hums in response then starts to lift your shirt up, dragging his fingertips up your stomach. “Arms up.” he tells you. Lazily you lift your hands above your head and shiver when the fabric is stripped from your body. “Good girl.” he brings you back into a heated kiss, eating your whimpers and moans from the pleasure between your legs. 
Johnny's eyes grow darker, watching Simon undress up until you are left in only your bra. His massive hands groping and pawing at your breasts, making you mewl while his tongue explores every crevice of your mouth. 
With a groan he pulls back, causing you to let out sounds of protest. Simon releases your lips to find Jonny grinning up at you both sheepishly. “Sorry, feelin a little left out, how'bout ye let me have a taste?.” he looks up at you with big eyes and pouts playfully.
The way he looks between your thighs like that, big shoulders holding you up for him so well. You release a shaky breath; one you didn't realize you were holding. There was so much happening and now this bit of calm made your head spin. Simon's hand on your breast was only just a gentle massage now. You get lost in his big blue eyes, all thoughts swimming away fast. 
Until a hand on your back urges you forward, tapping it a few times. “Go on pup, taste yourself on his lips.” he encourages you. 
You nod and lean forward; your hands reach out to hesitantly hold his face as you slide your swollen lips against his. Moist and covered in your slick. You moan pathetically along with his guttural groan. Much like Simon, he didn't hesitate when exploring your mouth. The kiss was short, Johnny pulling away while licking his lips. “Perfect Bonnie, such a sweet girl for us.” Johnny praised you. “Now how about we really make ye feel better, how’s that sound?” he asks, watching your eyes light up as you nod. He grins at you then Simon. ”Ready Si?” he asks. 
Simons grunts in response, retracting his hands from your body and goes to sit against the wall, sitting you between his legs. Legs still manage to hang slightly off your full-bed sideways. You want to protest when Johnny slides your legs off and back down to the floor. You really do until he reaches behind you and swiftly unclips your bra. “Can give me a show later, right Bonnie?” he winks and throws the garment behind him. He palms your breasts, one in each hand and massages them, squeezed them. Then he takes one nipple into his mouth and sucks hard.
Your back arches and your breasts are pushed into his face more, making him grunt in response. He bites you gently, rolling your sensitive bud between his teeth. “Go-ood… feels so good Johnny.” you force the words out and barely manage to control your moans.
Johnny’s cock twitched hard in his pants. Your pathetic attempt at forming thoughts was cute, he wanted to see you like that on his cock. A mumbling moaning mess, whimpering and crying to cum over and over. He pulls back to see that Simon already has his cock out. He chuckles and shakes his head. “Looks like someone's getting impatient.” he retorts. 
Simon ignored the resort. “Come’er pup, hands and knees.” Simon instructs, patting the open space between his legs when you look back at him. You look at Johnny who nods. You wanted to listen to both of them, needing them both to tell you it's okay. Shakily you shift and crawl fully onto the bed and sit on your knees between his legs. Your eyes traveled down to his cock and your heart started pounding even harder. He was huge, thick and long and… fucking thick. You had a thought that his knot might actually send you to the afterlife. Simon grabs your chin with one strong hand and leads you to his lap, your face placed right next to his cock. “Won't expect ya so take it down your throat just yet, dont worry lovie. Already to dumb with need to concentrate, aint ya pup?.” he chuckles, it's deep and heavy, making your pussy clench around nothing. 
You nod and wiggle your hips a little, your ass now fully presented to Johnny. He yanks your hips back, just enough so your feet are on the edge and his arms can rest on the sides of your calves. Finally situated Johnny wastes no time in diving in, lapping at your slick folds and making you a whimpering needy miss in seconds. He teases your clit with little flicks using the tip of his tongue. 
“Please, Johnny.” you whine, needing to cum. You were so pent up now with how much they have been toying with your body, your mind. 
A large rough hand softly stroked your bare back, inching closer to your ass with each stroke. “What is it lovie, what do ya need, tell us what ya need pup.” Simon coos. He sounded so gentle, almost too sweet to be Simon. You let out a small squeak when he palms one of your cheeks. With a firm grip he forced your ass up a bit. Johnny groans, it was only a small adjustment, but he feels like he can reach more of you. He swears he could stay between your thighs forever, devouring your perfect cunt. Simon chuckles, his partner was never good at taking things slow. Not when a pretty thing like you was making such sweet noises for them after all.
You whimper and peak up at him through your lashes. Your lips are parted and your panting right against his angry cock. Leaking pre cum and twitching at the sight of you. “Mm-more~ please, need it so bad.” you manage to choke out through a moan. Your hand softly wraps around the base of his cock. Your fingers are just barely making it around, he was so thick. Precum was covering your fingers already and all you wanted to do was a taste. So, you bring your fingers to your lips and suck on them, taste him and moaning. 
Simon can't help but groan at the sight. “Greedy little thing.” He taunts then directs his attention to the other male. “Johnny, beside ya in the bag.” he tells him. Johnny groans and rolls his eyes while pulling back. You whine and shiver at the loss of pleasure again. Tears swelled in the corners of your eyes. “Sshh pup, just a moment.” He ensures you. “We gotta take care of ya, make sure you can take us both, yeah?” he says, stroking your ass.
Your brain blankets when you hear him say the words. Both… you weren't sure how this was going to go but this, being completely stuffed full with both of them? Your pussy fluttered at the thought. You could feel your slick dripping onto the sheets below, making a mess of your bed. 
You can’t help but simply nod dumbly up at him.
“Here.” Johnny says and tosses a small bottle next to you that Simon swiped up instantly. He doesn't return his mouth to your cunt, instead he slides two fingers through your folds. “Pretty little pussy baby, tastes s’good.” he praises. You can't focus on Simon who's opening the bottle, too busy focusing on feeling Johnny's skilled fingers tease your clit and push against your little entrance. His middle fingers dips in, just a little before repeating the action, adding more each time. You mewl at the new sensation, his fingers bigger than your own and reaching deeper than yours were able to. 
Soon you feel the lube running down to your puckered hole and Simon's own fingers reach behind you and going right to your ass. “Ready lovie?” he asks, messages around your little hole with one finger. Johnny was no longer teasing you as he added another finger, rocking them into you at a steady pace. When you look back at Simon, his mask is off, hair sweaty and flat. Your pussy flutters around Soaps fingers. He was beautiful you thought, scars and all. Your hips jerk a little and you whine pathetically at him. It was so hot, your veins felt like lava ran through them. You leaned up on one elbow while your other hand took a better grip of his cock. You angle your head and his shaft so you could dart your tongue out and lick tentatively at the tip of his cock. You hum and wrap your lips around the tip of his leaky head. Your eyes close, relishing in the taste of his arousal. Simon's body reacts and his cock twitches in your hold, sending more precum right to your tongue. “Fuck'n hell love, just can't wait, can ya?” he says, lips curving into a grin. One big finger pushed its way into your tight entrance, pushing in until he was deep in your ass. 
Your eyes fly open and your lips part to let out a gasped squeal. “Si-Simon!” you yelp again when he pulls back and slides back in. 
Johnny Chuckles behind you, hot breath fanning your cunt. “Oh dove, this is just the beginnin.” he tells you before placing his mouth back on your pussy, sucking and nipping your sensitive clit. His fingers work your pussy open. Adding a third and stretching you even more at the same time Simon adds a second. Your body slumps against Simon with your ass raised for them. His stiff cock is so close but you just could touch it properly. The pleasure they give you as they work their fingers into your tight holes, filling you up and eating you all at once; your brain is breaking and fast. Flowing until the only thing you can think of is chasing your high, sticking your ass up and giving yourself to these two alphas. 
Simon added his third finger and you felt your whole body convulse. You felt the knot in the pit of your stomach tightening, burning and aching. “Please! Gonna c-cum, Simon, Joh-nny!” you whine into Simon's lap, hands grasping at the bottom of his shirt. 
They both managed to find the same rhythm, thrusting their fingers in sync into you at a blissful pace. Johnny swirls his tongue around your puffy bud before sucking hard. “C’mon pretty pup, cum for us. Cum on Johnny’s tongue.” Simon encourages you. He pushes a few stray strands of hair out of your face, wanting a clear view of you coming undone. 
Just a few more delicious curls of Johnny's fingers and you're a loud and moaning mess for them. Your holes pulse and clench around their fingers. They had teased you so much and you were so sensitive, your slick runs right onto Johnny’s tongue and he groans against your messy cunt. “Fu…fu-ck! Mmmfuck s’to good!” you whine out, body jerking as you try and keep still. You press your face firmer against Simon. Your nails rip little holes into the bottom of his shirt and you cum hard. Your body buzzed with pleasure and after shock and your head felt dizzy. Simon and Johnny helped you ride out your high but when Simon finally pulled his thick digits from your ass, Johnny only removed his fingers before he moved to lap at your still dripping hole. “Joh-Johnny, to much! To sensit-AH!” you gasp when Johnny shoves his tongue into you, tasting your sweet release. 
Johnny doesn’t stop, he growls at your pleas to stop and shoves his face deeper. Your knees shake as you feel another orgasm building. “He's just as greedy as you little pup, loves yer little pussy already.” Simon smiles sweetly down at you, watching you lose all focus again as his partner devours your cunt. “Johnny’s gonna make ya cum one more time, alright pup? Then we'll make sure yer little holes are nice and stuffed.” he says, stroking your cheek with the rough pad of his thumb. The only response you can give him is a lazy nod and a breathy moan. You notice a thick stream of precum drizzling down Simon's shaft and you try to reach out for his cock, almost dragging your upper half up enough to lick it up. You get to taste only a little of him before his hand wraps around your throat, fluidly locking you in place just out of reach from his throbbing angry length. “No more, keep teasing me and ya won't be able to walk tomorrow.” he threatens, knowing that if he let you continue he would cum way too fast. Watching you drool and pant over his cock was enough to make him want to cover your pretty little face with his seed.
Johnny's tongue is deep and his finger is circling your throbbing bud mercilessly. Your hips jerk back, pushing your cunt against his mouth even more, causing Johnny to growl into your heat and fasten his pace. “Mmm.. fuck.” you mumble, walls starting to spasm again, your legs shake in his strong hold. He made sure to keep your hips up for him. “Cum.. fuck! M’cumming!” you gush right into his mouth and just like the first one he lapped at your flowing juices. 
When he’s satisfied, he helps guide your hips gently to the bed. “There ye go sweet girl, so good for us aren't ye?” Johnny praises, rubbing the side of your hip and sitting next to you to get a good look at your face. His eyes darken with desire when he sees you're blown out pupils and the way you still struggle to catch your breath. You were perfect, he knew you would be the perfect girl for them. Johnny dragged his shirt over his body and tossed it. He smirks a little when your eyes scan his body, your thighs rub together when you spot his bulge. He reaches his arms out and wraps them around your body, pulling you from Simon's lap, making you realize his now torn shirt. “C’mere dove. Why don't ye help me out a little?” he places you on his lap, legs straddling his thighs.
Your eyes travel down to his crotch, his bulge pressing against his pants. Your fingers found the button and zipper, doing quick work of releasing the pressure he was feeling. Your eyes widen a little when your hand reaches under his boxers and feel just how big he was. Slipping his cock free, your assumptions were correct. He was huge, like Simon. Maybe not as long but about the same thickness overall. Your small hands wrapped around the base and started slowly pumping his cock.
Johnny lets out a breathy chuckle. His cock twitched furiously in your palms. “Fuckin eager aint she?” he hisses. Watching you gather his precum and licking it from your fingers. Johnny groans and brings your hands back to his cock, wrapping one large hand around your own and squeezing himself with you. He helps guide your hands up and down, showing you how he likes it. “See pup, just like that. Makin me feel s’good.” he drawls.
Beside you Simon shifts off the bed and stands behind you. You hear the sound of his shirt dropping to the floor. Before he leaned down so his lips could nip at your neck. Hands snake around your body to grope at your breasts. “S’enough of that, ya two.” he commands. His hands travel along your body and pry you away from Johnny, lifting you up with large hands on your thighs. You and Johnny both whine at Simon. “Behave, cock’s fucking aching to fuck ya pup. Not watch you blow your load in her hands.” Simon teases with a smirk and rubs the tip of his cock at your back hole. 
You whimper as you lean back against Simon. Your hands reach out for Johnny, needing him to hold onto while you're presented for him like this. Your legs held spread in the air, leaned back against Simon's broad chest, arms outstretched for him. How could he ever deny that? Looking at him so wontedly and desperate for their attention. “Oh Bonnie, look at ye.” he purrs, standing up and stepping up to you. Your arms instantly wrap around his neck, pulling his hips between your thighs. He helps hold you up so Simon can open the bottle of lube and rub it along his shaft. Johnny grinds his cock along your puffy folds at the same time Simon rubs his leaky tip at your other hole. “Ready pup, gunna need ye’ta relax for us.” He says, making sure you hear him. 
You nod and take a slow breath, letting your body rest in their hold. “M’ready, please.” you beg, voice going soft and sultry. 
Simon’s hands take hold of your thighs again. Holding you in place, he pushes his hips forward, bullying the tip into your pukes hole. “There we go love, going to be so good for us.” he says with a low growl. Your brows knit together as you try and stay calm, letting out shaky breaths the more he presses into you, the lube only doing so much. Simon was by no means so small. About halfway you couldn't suppress the loud whimper that escapes you. You feel his lips on your neck, his hot breath fanning over your skin while Johnny brings a hand to your pussy, finding your clit and messaging it slowly, helping you relax while Simon pushes deeper and deeper, trenching your ass open. “Fuck… so fuckin tight.” Simon nips your shoulder, holding back from sinking his teeth into your neck, claiming you right there as he bottoms out in your unused hole. “See lovie, knew ya could take me.” he kisses up your neck and your head leans back against his shoulder. 
You're panting and still desperately holding onto Johnny, fingers gripping the side of his neck, his shoulders, any way to keep him close. “Big. Simon so big." Your speech is broken, simple. Your brain is all hazed, articulating anything other than the basics. 
Simon keeps you there, impaled on his cock while Johnny lines himself up with your pussy, nudging that entrance in warning of what's coming. “Ready for another one, pup?” Johnny can't help but laugh at your dumb little nod, pathetic whines of ‘more’ and ‘please’. “Alright little one, hold still and breathe.” he tells you and waits for another nod. Then he pushed his hips forward, not taking as much time as Simon, already forcing half of his cock into your mushy hole. 
Your nails dig into his skin, clawing at his neck and shoulders, leaving marks behind. “Ah! Fu… S’to fast.” you slur breathlessly, the wind having been knocked out of you. 
Johnny chuckles softly and presses his face against your chest. “Sorry dove, I just couldn’t wait to be inside ye.” he whispers against your warm skin. He slows down however, not wanting to hurt you.
Both alphas kiss along your bare skin. Rough lips attack your shoulder, chest and neck. Simon focused on nipping and sucking a pretty dark bruise into the side of your neck while Johnny was busy leaving little marks all over your chest. Slowly he rocked the rest of his length into you until he also came to a stop. They pull back and look down at you, blown pupils and mouth hung open a little. You lean back against Simon's chest, fingers gripping into Johnny's shoulders. The three of you take a moment to breathe. Everything felt so tight from being stuffed with both of them. They take up all of the room inside your little holes. 
Once they felt your grip on their cock soften up they began moving, slowly thrusting in and out of you at the same time, letting your body get used to them. You gasp and whine with each thrust, feeling your walls clench and mold to the cocks stuffing themselves deep in your core. “S’good, feels… mm so fucking good.” you babble, getting lost in their rhythm. You felt like you were in heaven, squished between two alphas you had been pining after for so long.
Simon held your thighs while Johnny's hands gripped at your sides, angling your hips in the best position for them. “Doin so good for us Bonnie, takin us both so fucking well.” he grunts, feeling your pussy flutter and clench around him. “Gunna take our knots, let us claim ye. Want to be our good little pup, right lass?” Johnny whispers, leaning into your neck a little and nips at your sweet spot. 
Your head was spinning. Johnny was starting to press his thick knot to your little hole, causing you to whimper and shake in their arms. “Pl-please! Need it please!” you choked out with a frantic nod. “I want to be yours please, all yours.” Another orgasm was knotting quickly in your stomach, So fast your brain could hardly keep up. You really tried to speak, tried to tell them what was happening, but the words were lost. Your eyes squeezed shut and your nails clawed into Johnny's shoulders. All it took was Johnny finally popping his fat knot into your little pussy for your walls to furiously around their cocks. The boys groan around you. Johnny’s teeth found the spot that had your body arching into him and sank his teeth in. Simon watched as you both got lost in each other. Johnny’s teeth claiming you while his cock twitched deep in your pussy. He pumps you full of cum, making your body shake and chest heave. The sounds you both made were so needy and pathetic, it made Simon’s cock throb.
“Fuck, just like that love.” Simon groans into your shoulder, opposite Johnny whose teeth were still sunk into you. Simon’s fingers dig into your skin and so did Johnny’s. You could feel the little purple bruises already and it just turned you on even more. “Cummin s’well for us pup, pussy begging for our knots, isn't it?” he tried to sound more condescending, teasing, but with his heavy panting and groans rumbling in his chest he was clearly just as desperate as you were. 
Only a loud choked moan that turned into overstimulated yelps came from you. Simon slowed down to a soft, slow rocking pace. Keeping you full but allowing Johnny and you to come down a little from your high’s. Your eyes flutter to open while you catch your breath. If you weren’t obviously sandwiched between two massive bodies and impaled on their cocks, you could swear you were floating. Johnny finally released your neck and started kissing along your neck and licked and lapped at your freshly marked skin. It helped soothe the burning that came from being claimed. 
“So good, Bonnie.” Johnny’s voice was quiet, his eyes were half lidded as he looked at you. If he looked drunk from sex, then you must look like a complete mess you thought. “Got one more in ye, right lass, one more for Simon?” he asks sweetly, nuzzling into your cheek and neck while his cock stays perfectly sheathed in your pussy. 
Your head pulls to the side a bit so you can get a glance at Simon. You should feel his knot, ready to push inside your ass. You could see the need to sink his teeth into your neck and your body responded accordingly. Arching your ass as much as you could and giving him a little whimper. “Want it, Simon please, need you too.” you begged.
He can’t help the growl he gives you when he starts to thrust back into you. You and Johnny groan simultaneously at the pressure. “Since ya asked me so sweetly.” he chuckles breathless. His knot slammed against your stressed hole. Simon Nudged Johnny's head away with his own, he needed to claim you too, needed his teeth to tear into you and make you his too. Johnny leaned his head back and watched as your arms hung loosely against his forearms, barely holding on. Pretty eyes rolled back and mouth hung open. He brought a hand down between your legs to circle your sensitive bud. Simon felt your walls flutter around him, begging for his knot. A large, rough hand came up to grope at your breasts, Simon pinched your nipples and grazed his teeth over your tender gland. Your body began to tense, legs becoming shaky in the men's hands. “Gonna cum love? Gonna take my knot and cum all over Johnny's cock again?” he cooed against your neck before nipping at the skin, teasing you with his mark. 
All you could do was whimper half formed words and wiggle your ass a little for him. You looked up at him with lust blown eyes and a silent plea.
Johnny leaned down to kiss your chest. “C’mon Si, let her cum again, she feels so fucking good, I need to cum again, just one more time.” Johnny begged against your chest, now replacing Simon's hands with his own mouth, abandoning your clit. He’s rutting his hips into you again, chasing another release. The only response Simon gave to his pussy drunk partner was a grunt and a nod, amused at how needy he was being. He replaced Johnny and focused on your clit, rubbing it in quick circles. 
You were a mess for them, panting and moaning, begging with what little words you could for Simon's knot and more of Johnny’s cum. It was when Simon let his teeth finally sink into your neck, encompassing Johnny’s that had you seeing stars. A little symbol to stake his claim to the both of you and it had you shivering and crying at how blissful it felt. As you came both men held you firm, legs spread in their hands and Simon finally bullied his thick knot in, stretching you out almost painfully. You clawed with what little strength you had left at Johnny’s arms. Intens pressure turned into added flames once his knot was finally in, filling you up so completely the three of you shuddered at the tightness. In no time at all both men were filling your holes, coating you with their cum and growling into you. You felt like you could hardly breathe, your orgasm lasting so long you thought you might really pass out.
Your head was leaning back on Simon’s shoulder when he gently pulled his head away from your neck. The room was filled with heavy panting and your sore whimpers. You can feel Johnny"s cum leaking out around his knot and dripping to the floor, you knew if you looked down you would be embarrassed at the mess you all made. Johnny litters little kisses to your chest and shoulders, his thumbs rubbing your thighs. “Did s’good Bonnie.” he praised you and you gave him a small smile in response. 
Simon nuzzled the side of your head before placing a kiss on your temple, you leaned into his touch. “Just a little longer and we’ll get ya all cleaned up, love.” he told you. His hand came around to your tummy, feeling the bulge of Johnny’s cock and all the cum he has stuffed in you. 
Johnny grunts. “Si, if ye turn me on again, our girl might get scared of how much I can't resist er’pretty pussy.” he warns. 
You let out a little chuckle and your walls flutter around them. You were still so cock drunk that you’d probably let him take as many times, without complaint. 
A little slap to your thigh brings your attention to the man pressed to your back. “Watch it, yer going to need a little more training before ya can handle everything we can give ya.” you can't help the little pout on your lips and when you give him a little whine. “No pouting, you’ll thank me in the morning.” he tells you with a pointed look. 
You and Johnny both sigh a little but conceded, Simon was clearly the rule maker here. 
The next morning, squished between two sweaty and heavy alphas, you were thankful that Simon was the brains. Your body ached, your head was still a little hazy thanks to them being there and you were hungry. Thankfully you had two adoring alphas to look after you during your heat from now on. Two mates, your mates.
FIN~
this took a fuckin minute y'all's. but I hope some people enjoyed it!
723 notes · View notes
grapejuicestyless · 10 months
Text
People Pleaser
Harry Styles x fem! bandmate reader
summery: Y/n gives too much and Harry is the only one to give back.
Angst(kinda) to fluff!
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If you were to ask the public, ‘Who embodies love on tour?’ The majority, if not everybody would be quick to conclude it was Harry. He was the front man, it was his tour. A man who grows flowers with his voice and encourages affection between even the most different strangers.
If you asked the people involved, they would say Y/n Y/l/n.
Y/n is a woman with so much empathy she walked in others shoes more than her own. She spends her free time devoted to helping her friends and family. Constantly doting on them despite how grave the situation seemed.
So yeah, if you were to define HSLOT, it would be Y/n, Y/l/n. The pianist who sat quietly in the back of the stage, tucked away behind Sarah and Pauli, quiet as a mouse.
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The sun was high, burning into the black chevron of the HSLOT Wembley stage floor. The white and black paint radiating vastly different temperatures in the June heat. The backtracks boomed through the stadium, muffling the farther backstage you got. Humidity suffocated everything in a sticky wetness.
Harry was dancing in a black bunny shirt, sleeves rolled to his shoulders and shorts shorter than my own. Today the sun was more brutal than ever and the effects were obvious. Skin was redder than before and water bottles could be found empty and scattered beneath the instruments. The HSLOT band was huddling under the small amount of shade they could find over the small overhang mounted on the stage. Lucky for me, because of how tucked away my space was, I had full access to the cool shade and the slight breeze of the AC blasting through the backstage area. Mitch, however, due to his front and center stationing, was falling victim to the peak heat of the day.
Harry hummed into the microphone, lazily speaking numbers out of order to get a laugh out of anyone, though the heat seemed to be getting to him too as he seemed out of his usual pre-show element. The only thing there seemed to be more abundance of than Harry’s pitiful jokes, was the sweat drenching each and every one of us.
“Y/n/n?” A soft voice called from just in front of me.
Mitch stood just in front of Pauli who was stuck half in the sun and half in the shade, his body squished into the darkness. His hair was matted with wet and held up tightly in a man bun, his shirt drenched in sweat more so than the rest of us.
“Eh, Im sorry to ask but would you mind if we could just switch positions for just a bit? I’m overheating over there and need a small break.” He pleaded.
Ever the people pleaser, the urge to stay in the shade was pushed down and away as my body moved quicker than my mind. I was eager to make Mitch happy, loving the satisfaction helping a friend out gave me.
He traded me a small hand held fan for my perfect shady spot. Though the plastic wings barely moved and the air barely soothed the heat, the thought was nice enough of him to suggest.
So I stood in the sun, the rays casting down on me like a blanket that could only be described as hell on earth. Sweat collected more aggressively on my forehead but the quick look over to Mitch, who had a lazy smile on his face from the shade and the inconsistent AC gusts made it a whole lot more worth it.
By now we were on Satellite, Harry mumbling the song, waltzing over to Elin to make sure she was still feeling okay. It was moments like this that I believed we were soulmates. Bonded together by the environment that seemed to tug us together like some sort of gravity. His straightforward kindness and appreciation one of his best qualities that I loved.
I let myself marinate in my own wetness, my legs heavy from the heat and my cheeks growing sore from the sun. My eyes grew heavy and the fan grew weaker and weaker. Truthfully, I was struggling.
“Y/n..?” I heard a small yell from Sarah, who I was sure was boiling surrounded by all that plastic and metal, despite the shade. She was still blocked off from the AC air, so the heat might as well have been just as bad.
I nodded to her, making my way over cautiously, the floor slippery with the dew from the humidity and the sweat dripping off our noses.
“What’s up, babe?” I smiled, leaning against the edge of the platform her drums were set on.
“I’m struggling a bit here. I’m a little trapped.” I raised an eyebrow, ready to take a seat to listen to what she had to say. I wondered if it was about the baby or if it was a mental block. I was ready to be a good friend when she needed it.
“Do you think I could borrow that fan? Just for a second? It’s like a hotbox in here.” My eyes drifted to the soft vibrations rumbling through my palm, the soft buzzing sound from the hand held fan spinning softly in all its neon green glory.
Forming my lips into a thin line, I nodded, plastering on a smile and reaching up to hand it to Sarah.
She was thankful for my generosity, flashing me a smile and holding up a weak thumbs up. I reflected her gesture, hunching my shoulders as I spun to return back to the spot I’d taken in the sun.
Just now, I began to realize how much I took that tan for granted. Even the soft wind was able to move the still air that casted over the UK today.
My heavy feet turned into cinder blocks and my eyes became unbearably heavy. I seemed sway on my feet a little, every blink becoming stickier as my eyelashes bunched together more and more. It felt like hours going by. Realistically it had only been five minutes, but everything moved in slow motion now.
I think Harry was singing Matilda now, but it seemed to be silenced by the clogging of my ears. I felt faint suddenly, my body too heavy to hold up. I felt myself stumble. It was usually now I would focus all my attention in on his beautiful melody, but my ears seemed to reject any sound whatsoever other than shouts and belly laughter across the stage.
“Hey Y/n!” I heard loud and clear, the bubbly voice belonging to none other than my best friend. The man who I’d been stuck with since his very first show and the person in my mind that hung the stars and moon single handedly in my life. The closest thing I had to a home on tour, Harry.
I’m not sure if I was able to lift my lips into a smile or not, everything blurring together in a mushy mess. It was like I was on psychedelics while being totally sober.
Trying to remain polite, I tried to be more welcoming to him, reaching up to wave only to find myself stumbling back into the elevated stage platforms, hands slamming into the wood so hard the corners caused red lines to form, blood peaking in blots on my skin.
“Y/n!” He sounded more frantic now, not as light and airy like before. The sound of a microphone falling to the ground was ear piercing, if I could cover my ears I would. His feet sounded heavy, the sound echoing through the empty area like bricks. My elbows collapsed under the pressure of my body and my knees buckled.
I waited for the ground to come, braced for it even. Ready to bruise my face and bleed from the nose. But it never came. Instead I was wrapped in a wet body, my face smushing against a hard chest.
“Shit, can I get some medical help?” Harry. Harry had caught me. How quick he was to rush in to help.
I couldn’t quite make out his face with how jumbled up my brain was from the heatstroke I was almost sure my body was going through right now, all I saw was black dots and blurry pink lips moving quickly. I think he mumbled, “You’re okay, it’s fine.” But maybe that was an illusion I made up for some sort of comfort.
We met eyes, a worried shock painted on Harry’s face before I was met with the soothing darkness of sleep.
——————————————————————————
I woke up to a cooler climate. A buzzing sounding through the vent on the ceiling. Tassels of pink and yellow blowing in the wind. I had an ice pack taped to my forehead and one wrapped around my stomach with velcro.
My head was pounding with one of the worst headaches I’d ever dealt with in my entire life and my eyes were aggressively watering despite my excessive wiping.
I tried to sit up, but could only groan with how sore I was, my hand pressing against the ice pack quickly.
“Y/n, oh thank god.” I felt the couch dip by my head, Harry’s body kneeling on the ground in front of my face and his head hovering over mine as he hunched over me. The carpet ruffled beneath his knees as he settled into place. His breathing was slightly jagged, a little quick. Maybe in his panic it had picked up. Compared to mine, which was slow and steady. A good long sleep will do that to you.
“Did I faint?” My mouth was dry, so everything that came out of my mouth was strained and rough. Sandpaper scratching my vocal cords.
The question was obvious, I knew I had gone down before I even fell. I knew I was going down as soon as I handed away the shady spot and the fan. Maybe not directly, but that small tugging feeling that fought briefly with my body knew. I couldn’t help but let the smallest smirk grace my lips, trying to be funny and light hearted in a time of need.
“Gave everyone a proper scare, really did. Went down pretty fast.” He lifted an arm from his sides to gently move the ice pack from my forehead, sensing the slight discomfort it was giving me, a soft smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. We watched each other quietly in the quiet of the communal dressing room.
His smile was infectious, always was. Harry had that kind of bunny tooth smile that made my stomach do secret summersaults and flutter occasionally. Despite the strict platonic relationship we’d established, it was hard to not fall for the other half who understood the urge to put others before myself just as well.
Lost in the dreamy thought of him, I snapped back to see the white smile slowly wipe off his face, eyebrows pulling together in worry and his gaze becoming less lighthearted and more serious.
“Was it dramatic? Could I win an Oscar for it?” I joked, lightening up the mood, or attempting to.
“Yes, and yes. Would’ve swept them, I think.” We laughed weakly, not finding the situation funny but the inability to stay so serious for so long amusing.
“We shouldn’t have had soundcheck outside. I knew it was too hot out, I’m sorry.” The warm bareness of his fingers engulfed mine gently, his thumb brushing my knuckles so light it almost barely ghosted over my skin.
“It’s not your fault, I made a couple bad choices that got me there.”
“Such a pushover.” I snorted, removing my hand from his in fake offense to his comment, though it was both true and not in any sense mean or bad intentioned.
“And to think, I had the perfect AC spot in the shade too!” We continued to joke, not finding anything about this at all serious. We probably seemed fucked in the head to the outside perspective. Who treats heat stroke like it meant nothing?
“I need to learn how to say no.” Harry silently agreed, eyes flicking up to mine slowly, almost like he was tracing my body in an outline in his head. Saving a mental photo of his best friend covered in sweat, melted ice and plastic icepacks.
“You do.” I smiled.
“I know.” He raised a brow.
“You do. Can’t have that happening. Scared me.” His sudden confession lacked any previous lightheartedness that we’d bounced off of each other just moments before.
I grabbed his hand again, now my thumb was the one to merely ghost over his skin smoothly.
“I know, I’m sorry. Don’t wanna worry you.” It was the most sincere thing I’d said all day. The only thing I’d truly meant really. All those “My pleasures” and, “Of courses” only being half hearted and made based solely on the idea that someone else could benefit from it more than I would.
“I love you.” Silence hugged the room around his confession. Not that we hadn’t exchanged the sentence consistently. Throwing it around so much it was a habit to tell each other before we left any room or made a joke so good it deserved the praise. But somehow, the words sat different than before. They held more seriousness and more honesty than the other times, and I couldn’t help the giddiness it gave me.
“I love you too.” Maybe if the situation wasn’t so dramatic and the heat wasn’t getting to both of us incredibly bad, maybe then it wouldn’t have happened. Some sort of forced confession out of the blue.
He showed no signs of having any interests in me. Other than the constant presence he seemed to enjoy having in my life and the fact that nobody knew me like him, he could have fooled me completely.
“Yeah?” He laughed through his teeth, breathy and light.
I nodded slowly, sure of myself but shy on the idea he could be playing with me. He would walk me to the door of hope and send me home crying. Maybe it was the feeling of giving so much and never getting anything back. Maybe it was the all too familiar feeling of being used because of the overflowing empathy I was dealt at birth and the nagging persistence in my mind ordering me to please the people around me that was responsible for the twinge of doubt I held to him. But his eyes held kindness and full trust, I couldn’t help but feel that fluttery feeling.
It could have been from the heat, but most likely from him rushing the blood from my heart straight to my cheeks.
“I hope you mean it in the way I think you mean it, because if this is the heat stroke playing with my feelings, I’m about to look really stupid.” My arms outstretched around his neck, pulling him to my lips. My fingers tangling between his puffy curls and damp with the sweat beaded on the back of his tanned neck.
His kiss was just as sweet as I expected it. It wasn’t an intricate make out with a long battle between our tongues. It was needy, but not in a rushed way. It was short, but did more than any sloppy kiss could possibly say.
“Is now a good time to say I only see you as a friend?” I couldn’t help but silently laugh at that. My chest moving up and down while my mouth was pulled into a large smile that broke out on my face.
Harry was still so close, yet to pull back completely as his breath fanned my nose and his forehead almost touched mine.
“Now that I’ve wooed you, does this mean you’ll let me play tonight?” His lips silenced mine, pressing hard and smooth against each other. He pulled away with a wet release.
“No.” For the millionth time, we laughed. We laughed, feeling happy. Content that I was okay, that this was okay. That we were whatever we were. Maybe we had crossed the line between strictly platonic. Maybe we were towing the line between lovers and best friends. But it didn’t matter because whatever we had was warmer than the June heat and bigger than any crowd Wembley could pull in our hearts.
It was all some sappy story of the girl who gave too much and the only man who gave back, very on brand for the HSLOT crew.
Maybe heat strokes could be good.
Read part 2 here!
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vinsmokesangio · 3 months
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How I imagine Tom Blyth as a boyfriend (headcanon)
i’m sorry but my mind is full of british actors and blondies 🙏🏽 (english is not my first language)
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sfw • green flags 🟢
you’ll have a lot of fun! you can expect a lot of internal jokes, random videos together goofing around
super chill, like you two rather stay at home at a friday night watching comfort TV shows, order or cook something
golden retriever bf!!! but honestly tom doesn’t seems to be clingy or use words of affirmation all the time, but it’s okay bc he can make it up with other things, like…
… acts of service as a love language: when you sick, he’ll do anything for you even when you can make it yourself, he won’t let it.
kinda vain and smells reeeally good
big sense of humour and probably will laugh the shit out of you when you misspell a word or stumble
will make you fall in love with him by being super annoying on purpose
likes to cuddle sometimes when he’s feeling needy - which is not so frequent, tom seems to be self-sufficient
perfect karaoke partner 💜
nsfw 🔞
sometimes gropes you just for fun but if you don’t stop him you’ll end up on his bed
softdom for sure!!
but also a sweetheart
tender and intense, eye contact all the time
not much stamina, it depends on his mood but mostly just one round. im sorry lol
quickies 🤪
red flags 🚩
not really good at talking about his feelings but really good as a listener. seems to be mature enough to understand your needs and change something you dont like if you ask him
sometimes moody, he needs his personal space and probably won’t let you know, he'll just isolate himself caution if you're anxious!
aquarius problem: he is self-sufficient, is it difficult enough to be in a serious relationship bc he likes freedom, so if tom chose to be with you, he truly loves you and tries his best to make you happy
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heeliopheelia · 7 months
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"there's nothing i'd change about you. i love every single part of you" (niki x reader)
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genre: fluff, comfort fic word count: 0.6k requested by @im-yn-suckers ♡
a/n: i felt like writing something lighter tonight so here we go with kinda reversed comfort fic!! i'm working on the next hee drabble as i'm posting this one, so if everything goes well i'll finish the 1k event this week!!
masterlist
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A frown makes it way on your face as you check the clock and realize it's been fifteen minutes since your boyfriend's finished his shower. He's been in a foul mood ever since he's come back home, visibly exhausted and irked by every smallest thing on his way. He spat some harsh words at you too, but the instant regret flashing in his eyes each time let you know that he didn't mean them at all.
So you did your best to give him the much needed space, knowing that nothing helps him clear his head more than some time alone, but after such a long time of absolute silence coming from across the hall, you can't help but feel slightly worried.
You call out to him softly and when you get nothing in response, you make your way into the bathroom where Riki is. You tilt the door open and take a peak inside the steamy room, only to feel your heart dropping at the sight of your boyfriend slouching in front of the mirror, hands braced on each side of the sink as his head is hanging lowly, eyelids squeezed shut.
Your eyes soften immediately at the miserable sight and without a shadow of hesitation, you walk towards him.
"You okay, babe?" You put on your most comforting tone as you wrap your arms around his torso from behind. "You've been beating yourself up for a while now, hm? Tell me what's on your mind, handsome?"
"It's just–," he cuts himself off with a frustrated sigh, running his hand through his face. "I know I can be a lot sometimes. And I'm sorry that you have to deal with all of that so often. You must be tired of this shit by now."
You frown slightly, pulling your head away slightly to press a kiss to his shoulder blade.
"Hey, don't say stuff like that. It's okay, everyone lets their emotions unleash from time to time, it's normal. Would be hard for one to stay perfect all the time," you hum quietly, squeezing his waist a little tighter. "But there's nothing I'd change about you anyway. I love every single part of you. Especially the parts that you love about yourself the least."
Riki breathes out a heavy sigh and finally lets himself relax into you a little bit as the guard that he's kept so high up absolutely crumbles. You can see how exhausted he looks now, the usual playful glimmer abandoned his now nearly dull eyes couple days ago. You slip your hands underneath his shirt and run your warm hands over his abdomen in hopes of bringing him some source of comfort.
"I could never get tired of you," you let out a quiet whisper after another moment of silence, and rest your cheek on his back. "Just because you're not smiling and laughing all day long doesn't mean you're suddenly undeserving of my love, Riki. I love you just as much as I did last week – if not even more."
At that, your boyfriend finally pushes himself off the counter and turns around to draw you in closely into his arms. Leaning down, he buries his face in your hair and holds you tightly as his head buzzes with all the love he carries for you.
"Thank you," he murmurs, hand caressing your hair gently, "for always being here. You're my little angel, you know that, don't you?"
You hum quietly and raise to your toes to plant a soft kiss on his lips. "And I'll always stay here. And you will start trying to let me in a little more, okay? It's you and me against the problem – not you against me. Promise me?"
Riki looks at your outstretched pinky finger for couple seconds before intertwining it with his and lifting it up to his lips to seal the pledge with a kiss.
"I promise."
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permanent taglist: @bambisgirl @arizejkt19 @luvmura @milisabunny @cathy-1997 @satoruskitchenrag @ramenoil @jenjnk @jaylaxies @yoongspi @nichoswag @s00buwu @dazzlingligth
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ohbo-ohno · 6 months
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Please please bo sort a girl out with Ghoap x Reader in an abandoned farm 🤪🤪
1k game here - no more please!
@luminousbeings-crudematter my beloved!!! idk if tumblr gives you a notif when i post an ask you sent so im tagging you just in case lol. also you said "unhinged texas chainsaw massacre" and i tried my best but i've never seen that movie :')
3.8k of ghoap x reader ft. ghost and soap hunting down their newest pet in a corn maze (cw: rough noncon sex, kinda puppy play? super light) this is mostly soap x reader, sorry!!
The collar is heavy around your neck, making every breath difficult as you pant. Your lungs seize in your chest when you stumble through the corn maze, desperate for any light at the end of the tunnel.
It doesn't come, but you push on anyways.
The corn is rough against your arms and legs, your body vulnerable to the rough stalks with so many tears in your clothes. Everything hurts - your feet from the rough ground, your throat from all the screaming, your stomach from pure fear and adrenaline. You're too blinded from terror to focus on any of that, the only thought in your head to go go go go get away.
The roar of a chainsaw is loud somewhere to your right. You nearly fall to your knees at the sound, windmilling your eyes to keep yourself steady. A loud, manic laugh echoes from the same direction, and your legs nearly give out.
Fuck, he's right there.
You can't think about how close the sound is, can't focus on how you swear you can see the corn moving, you can only run.
The stalks split in front of you, and you stumble into a clearing. You freeze, feet stopped right on the border of the new area. You bounce onto your toes, like you'd been tugged to a stop before exposing yourself.
The clearing is empty accept for an old tractor, sitting in the center of the grass. It's just a large enough circle that you'd be exposed for several seconds if you tried to reach it, totally clear if anyone was in the stalks.
But... you could hide there, couldn't you? The machine looks massive from your vantage point, there's surely a place to hide there.
It feels cruel to leave your fellow victims to the killers hunting them down, but you know that you have to try and save yourself before trying to help someone else.
You take a deep breath as you sink back to your heels, crouching a little lower in the corn to see if you can spot any movement around the perimeter.
The chainsaw revs again, and someone screams.
Your decision is made for you. The sound of death sends you forward, instinct making you move.
The dirt is rough beneath your feet, small rocks sticking into the soft parts of your sole and offsetting your run. You try your best to keep your balance, eyes trained on the tractor and the small space you know you can squeeze in.
It's silent but for the sound of your own panting, blood rushing through your ears, nothing but that perceived safety in your mind.
Just as you start to ready your legs to launch yourself up to the seat, legs tensing, you're shoved away. Your breath is forced from your lungs as you hit the ground, dirt and rocks shoved into your arms as you roll.
"Ah!" You cry out, forced to your stomach as you roll. It takes a minute to recognize what's happened, for it to click in your mind that someone's there.
It's too late by the time you realize.
You still try to get away, some animal part of you knowing that it's dangerous to stay down.
You manage to get to your knees, eyes darting wildly to spot whoever's tackled you, to know what direction to run. But the field is empty, and you're already moving before you think to look behind you.
It costs you, because you hardly get a step away before you're shoved to the ground again, your attacker staying over your body.
"Where you goin'?" The man rumbles in your ear, his chest pressed to your back and lips against your ear. He nips the shell of your ear and your eyes fly open, face shoved into the dirt.
Hardly a foot away, a chainsaw rests in the dirt. Blood drenches the blade, slowly dripping into a puddle beneath the weapon. It makes you whimper, trying to squirm away from the killer above you.
"No, no, no," he purrs, nosing his way to your cheek and just leaning there, pressing his smile into your skin, his voice rumbling through your back. "Down, pup, c'mon, you're caught. No point in runnin'."
"Please-" you gasp, neck arching to try and get away. "Please, please, please-"
He makes a sound that's somewhere between a laugh and a grunt. "Please, please, please?" His voice pitches up in a mocking tone, a horrible imitation of yours. "You a broken record, lass? Only wanna say the same thing? Come on, tha's no fun, gimme something new."
You shout, the sound caught somewhere between a cough and a sob, hands stretching forward and clawing at the earth. "Please!"
He truly laughs now, a sharp noise in your ear. He stretches himself up above you, chest lifting and hips pushing into yours so that your legs are pinned. All you can do it try to drag yourself forward, hot tears beginning to fall as you're held down in the same place.
"Guess it does sound good from your lips," he muses. He shifts behind you, knees squeezing to either side of your hips and hands reaching so he can grab your elbows.
"Look'it you," he tsks, bending forward to lace your hands together. You cry out at the feeling of being covered, his chest above your head. "Ruinin' your pretty nails, and for what?"
Your head drops to the ground, sobs tearing your throat to shreds as spit falls from your lips. You feel bile working in your stomach, that horrible tension beneath your tongue like you're about to throw up.
"I can't-" you gasp, panic clawing at your mind. You know this man is going to kill you, that he's going to make it hurt, and every part of you rebels at just the thoughts. You can't stop fighting, can't stop trying to get away from him even with the weight holding you down.
"Can't what?" He hums, shifting to kneel above you so that he's not nearly suffocating you. "Can't go anywhere? Naw, bonnie, you're not goin' anywhere now. Caught you fair and square, didn't I?"
There's a part of you that screams to try and argue, to take a deep breath and settle to see if you can make some sort of deal, but the bigger part of you can't calm down, can't do anything but try and shove yourself out from the maniac above you.
"Plus, if I let you go runnin' off you might get caught by Simon." His arms settle on your shoulders and you can't help but yelp, ducking your head low to try and protect your neck. "Then I'd lose. You want that? Thought we were closer than that, lass."
You sob, teeth clenched tight. You don't fucking know the man, you don't know whoever Simon is, you just want to go home.
"That's what I thought," he hums. "Now," he pushes up, and your arms and torso are free as he settles back to rest his weight on your thighs. "I think you and I have some time to play, hm? Before Simon catches us both."
You don't- you don't know what he means, and it's hard to breathe past the fear. It clicks when his hands move to your hips, gripping them tightly.
"Wait," you gasp, eyes flying wide when his fingers creep beneath the hem of your jeans. "Wait, stop-"
"Oh, look at that," he laughs, hands shoving further down until his palms wrap around your thighs. "Learned some new words, baby?"
Your eyes squeeze as your feet kick against the dirt, unable to find any traction without shoes. Scrabbling so frantically only to stay right where you're pinned only serves to work you up more, to make your heart race faster.
"You're warm," he hums, kneading at your thighs and using his wrists to force the pants down, slowly revealing more and more of your skin to the cold night air. "Gonna warm me up, lass?"
"No," you hiss, the realization of what he's going to do sinking in. Your pants are pulled down to mid thigh, keeping your thighs from spreading and leaving your backside on display. "Stop- I'll- don't you dare-"
He laughs again, landing a harsh smack to your vulnerable ass. You cut your begging off with a yelp, hips rocketing into the ground to try and escape the sting when he lands another slap.
"You tryin' to boss me around? Real cute, pup, but you don't have a leg to stand on. Stuck pinned in the dirt and still tryin' to be in charge?" He laughs again, blows shifting from slaps to taps, jiggling the fat of your ass. "Cute, bonnie. Real cute."
You fold an arm beneath your face, try to use the other to force yourself up. "Stop fucking- stop hitting me, you bastard!"
"Oh!" He cackles, his lap slap almost bruising in it's force. "She's got some spine, huh? Maybe you'll be more fun than I thought."
You snarl into the dirt, legs kicking up behind you to try and hit his back. He's too high up on your thighs o reach, and you end up kicking the air like a toddler throwing a tantrum. It only fuels your anger, makes you feel more stuck.
"Keep fightin', bonnie." He presses himself closer to your face, and you catch a glimpse of sharp teeth from your peripheral, his smile sharp. "Makes it more fun for me. Think you'll tighten up if you kick kickin' and screamin'?"
You scream, a primal sound straight from the gut as you throw your head back and to the side, trying to hit him. You somehow manage it, but you hurt yourself just as much. You cry out at the sudden pain in the back of your skull, crumbling back to the ground.
There's a loud moan over your shoulder, and his hips press into yours. He's hard to your horror, his length pressing against the softness of your ass. "Fuck, that felt good."
God, the man is disturbed.
Your attempted attack doesn't stop him from hooking his fingers in your underwear, tugging them down to rest in the crease where your thighs meet your ass.
"Pretty," he purrs, hands stroking from your rips to your jeans, hands pushing hard enough to make you whine. His treatment is all too rough, like he's trying to mold you into the shape he wants. "Can't wait to get my dick in you," he groans, groping you.
"Nooo," you whine, trying to push yourself into the dirt, like it might open you up and swallow you whole, help you escape the horror you can't do anything to stop. "You can't- you can't fuck me, please, don't-"
He moans again, and you hear the clinking of a belt being undone. "Fuck, say it again for me."
Your eyes squeeze shut. You want to be anywhere else, anywhere but here.
You feel the heat of his cock against your ass, and tears sting in your eyes. You taste dirt against your lips, feel your palms sluggishly bleed from the scrapes against the rough ground. You try to focus on everything but what the killer's doing to you, but's impossible
His palm cups your center, fingers wrapping around your vulva and holding firmly. You flinch when his middle finger works between your folds, coming to rest on your clit.
"Need to get you wet," he mumbles, starting to work at the nub to coax some pleasure out of your body. "Simon wouldn't like it if I made you bleed." He snorts, then corrects, "Well, bleeding down there. Won't be shocked if he wants to carve you up a bit."
You shiver, focused too much on staying stiff and keeping your mind as far away as possible to put off the inevitable. What he says doesn't even properly click in your mind, floating in one ear and out the other.
"There we go," he purrs, palm growing slick as your body warms to him unwillingly. He grunts as he shifts to use both hands, one focusing on your clit and the other coming back to tease at your hole.
Two fingers slip in without warning and you yelp at the sudden stretch, hips bucking back instinctively and forcing the fingers further. Your moan is pulled from your chest, part pleasure and part pain.
"You want more lass? Here, don't mind stretching you out."
The third finger comes too soon, too suddenly, and the sting edges too close to pain for you to feel good, even unwillingly.
He's got no patience at all, fingers spreading inside of you while his thumb works furiously at your clit. The mix of good and bad leaves your head clouded, tears slowing as your mind starts to float away a bit.
He moans against your back, face pressed into your shoulder. "Feel so tight, bonnie. Can't wait til you're wrapped around me, wet and tight... fuck, can't wait much longer..."
His teeth press into you throw the fabric of your shirt, the bite only slightly blunted. You breath stutters out of your chest, lips shaking. You want to fight, tell yourself that you should bite and claw and scream, but he's already proven to you that he'd only enjoy that. All you can do is lie in the dirt, lamp and shaking.
Despite all your fear and your hatred for the man over you, you wish he'd stretched you out more.
"Gotta get inside of ya," he grunts, tugging his fingers out with a terribly wet sound. You can hear him sucking your wetness off of them as he shifts further up, letting his hard length rest between your thighs. "Don't... God, you taste good, don't wanna stretch you out too much. You get it, yeah bonnie?"
You whine forlornly, turning your head to the side. You can see him over your shoulder - tall and broad, brown hair in a... mohawk?, bright teeth shown off in a smile. He ducks down while he fists his cock, dipping himself into your wetness.
Wet lips press a kiss to your cheek, a trail of that wetness left against your face. When he pulls back you see the blood dripping from his nose, sniffle at the realization that he's left his own blood over your face.
"Look pretty in red," he whispers, tone oddly soft. It tugs another tear out of you, dripping down the bridge of your nose. His free hand comes up to your face, running a finger through the tear track and sucking the drop off his fingertip. "Taste good everywhere, love."
Your eyes close when he notches himself at your hole, pressing in just enough for you to feel the stretch. He's massive, and the prospect of him shoving himself fully inside of you... you shudder, trying to loosen yourself as much as you can.
He's not kind when he pushes in. You're not sure why you hoped he would be, not with the blood-soaked chainsaw still in your line of sight. But the sudden fullness, the sting, the stretch, draws a high cry from your lips.
His groan nearly drowns out your sounds, your walls spasming around him to try and adjust. You hate that it feels so good for him when you feel like you can hardly breathe around him.
"Feels so good," he moans, words hardly enunciated, thick accent only thickened by his pleasure. You can hardly understand him, far too upset to bother translating him in your head.
"Can't-" he pants, hips jerking out just a few inches only to buck back into yours, pushing as far inside as he can. "Can't come, but can get you off, yeah?"
There's a part of you that's confused by that, that wonders what the fuck he's talking about, but a much larger part of you is focused on the slow drag inside of you.
It would feel better if you were a little wetter, a little more stretched out, but you can't change those things. You relax, try to force your body to cooperate just to make things easier. You try to lean into the parts that do feel good - the way his cock drags against all the most sensitive parts of you, the slap of his balls against your clit - and sink into that pleasant feeling instead of the adrenaline still lingering in your veins.
He doesn't speak when he fucks into you, forehead pressed into your shoulder blade as he starts to drive you truly insane. It starts feeling good quickly enough for you to forget the pain, the horror, and you gladly fall into the oblivion creeping over your mind.
It's good, as horrible as it is to think. The bastard knows what he's doing.
It's some indeterminate amount of time later when you hear the stalks shifting again, eyes flying open just in time to see a man step into the clearing.
The man over you moans when the stranger gets closer, turning his head to the side. His hips buck into you even more roughly, your thighs beginning to ache from the force.
"Simon," he calls out, and it clicks in your head.
The new man is masked and wearing all black, and you recognize him as the other killer hunting you through the maze. His mask is just as terrifying from close up as it was when you first glanced over your shoulder while running, the sight of him in the distance almost floating while surrounded by shadows.
"Bein' good, Johnny?" He rumbles, boots stopping next to the chainsaw and toeing it away.
"Yes, sir," the man over you - Johnny - grunts, thrusts erratic. "Left-left the ring on, haven't come, promise."
There's a hum from above you, the man crouching down. "Good boy. Woulda had to ruin your fun if you got yourself off."
He whines at that, and you can't help but furrow your eyebrows. The man above you going from cocky and terrifying asshole to whining and moaning above you doesn't fit with the image you'd had in your head.
"I ken. 'S why I didn't take it off, ye bawbag." Johnny's voice shakes a bit as he switches to grinding against you, hips pressed flush with yours. The sudden pressure against your clit and so deep inside of you leaves you moaning, eyes rolling back. The peak of an orgasm is right there, just out of reach, and you reach for it desperately.
"Watch it," Simon scolds, shifting forward to his knees and reaching far enough to slap Johnny, the sound echoing through the silent clearing. Your eyes fly open, instinctually flinching away.
Simon's head tilts down to you, ignoring Johnny's whine. His gloved hand comes down to rest on your face, gripping your chin and lifting enough to get a good look at your face.
"Pretty thing," he says, giving your face a little shake before letting you drop to the ground. You can't even begin to care so close to the edge, focus solely on getting off
"'S what I said."
"Hmm. Why don't you go ahead and get the poor pup off? Looks like she's cockdrunk enough as is, might as well get her the whole way there before we take her home."
"With pleasure, sir."
It's hard to focus after that point. Johnny's hand tunnels beneath your stomach and to your clit, working his hips in full thrusts and rubbing you so perfectly. It takes hardly any time at all to get you off, the perfect mix of sensations sending you flying over that edge.
You're not sure what happens between the time when you come and when Johnny pulls out. Your vision nearly whites out, moving away from the scrapes and bruises and into the pleasure gripping every muscle. It's so much easier to lean into the good than the bad, to pretend the warmth is just the pleasure instead of the man at your back.
You're brought back into the real world by the feeling of something being wrapped around your neck, left just tight enough for you to jerk, panicked you couldn't breathe.
"Hush, pup," Simon shushes when you jerk up, eyes flying wide. "Just givin' you your collar. Makin' sure anyone who spots you can take you right home, hm?"
Johnny tugs you up as Simon speaks, grip just a tad too rough on your shoulders when he pulls you up to your knees. You're still a bit out of it as he tucks your jeans and underwear up, dick hard and slick against the small of your back.
The fear comes back as you're brought to your feet by Simon, hands on your elbows tugging you up. You're unsteady on your feet, knees almost knocking together while you blearily blink up at the masked man.
The sound of metal clinking together, a small yank against your neck, is what brings you fully back into your skin. Simon clips a leash to your collar and then Johnny's, matching pink and blue leads that make your eyebrows furrow.
Johnny - shirtless, drenched in blood - smiles at you, teeth stained with his own blood.
"Come on," Simon rumbles, a sudden tug against your throat nearly sending you to your feet. "Need to get you home, pup."
Johnny catches you before you can fall, laughing as he helps you up. The sight of a black studded collar at his throat jars you, fingers lifting to feel at the fabric around your throat. It's not studded, just a soft leather with a thick ring at the front where the leash connects.
"Looks good on you," Johnny compliments, guiding you to stumble along behind Simon as the man leads you both away, into one of the entrances to the maze.
"What..." your throat is rough and you cough, heartbeat picking up. "What're you doing?"
Johnny's smile is a little condescending, almost herding you forward by staying half behind you. "Takin' you home, lass. You're the last one alive. You make a pretty final girl, bonnie."
There's a sharp yank at your collar, tugging your attention to Simon where he's glancing over his shoulder at you. "Think you'll make a good pup. Johnny's been needing a new little friend, might as well be you, hm?"
There's.... nothing really to say to that. You're too weak, too shaky to try and make a run for it. The blue leash is held loose in Simon's hand, but the pink is wrapped tight around his fist. There's no way you're strong enough to jerk it out of his hand, and even if you could you've got no way out of the maze - they already found you first.
Johnny's hand nudges you forward, almost making you fall. He moves to walk beside you, shoulders almost rubbing together. You think the expression he shoots you is supposed to be comforting, but it's anything but.
You breathe deeply, head beginning to throb again, and hope you have the strength to survive what they'll do to you.
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taintedcigs · 7 months
Text
GETAWAY CAR — rockstar!e.m. x f!reader
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CHAPTER ONE: BEST OF TIMES, THE WORST OF CRIMES
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✦ summary: in which you return to hawkins to attend your best friend nancy's wedding, facing the problems you left behind, and the one person you abandoned; eddie munson. (wc: 9.4k+)
✦ warnings — ANGSTANGSTANGST, pining and slowburn, reuniting <33, strong language!, mentions of alc*hol and drg use and a toxic relationship, reader is sad and feels guilty. kinda mean eddie but not rlly.
✦ pairings — rockstar!eddie munson x fem!reader, past billy hargrove x fem!reader
✦ authors note — okay so its finally HERE. im SOOO EXCITED for u guys to read it!! i have tried to proof-read this a lot but my mind is fuzzy so ignore all mistakes!! if u need some stuff to listen to while reading this long ass chapter or the songs mentioned in it u can check out the playlist !! hope yall enjoy it mwah &lt;3
series masterlist | series playlist
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I'm a cold heartbreaker Fit to burn and I'll rip your heart in two
The sound coming from your slightly jammed stereo while the rain gently pattered on the roof of your car could’ve been heavenly. 
If only it weren’t the roads of Hawkins that you were travelling in. Five years that had passed were seemingly nothing when you recognized the familiar streets and the infamous forest, heart skipping a beat when you finally arrived on Maple Street. 
The cars parked just outside of the Wheeler House were enough to give you anxiety, especially when your eyes spotted that van. His van. Why did he still have it? Wasn’t he a rich rock star by now? There was an unnecessary bitter taste in your throat, and your gaze was stuck on the van now, gulping physically as you tried to ignore those guilty feelings bubbling up inside of you. Mind quick to revel in all those memories you had with him in that stupid vehicle.
5 YEARS AGO.
“Hurry!” You whisper-yelled, still looking around, Eddie was right behind you, his tongue darting out of his mouth as it always did when he was focused, running like hell as his calloused hands harshly gripped the tequila bottle that you two had just stolen.
The angry voice of the shop’s owner had long disappeared by now, but you could never be too careful. When you finally got close to his van, you stopped Eddie immediately. “Behind you!” You yelled in a fake-worried voice, causing Eddie to start sprinting forward toward the car.
When he noticed you not following and breaking into laughter, his worried face eased as he realized your little prank, giving you a humorless laugh as he started sprinting towards you.
You squealed when he grabbed you by your waist, lifting you off in one swift motion, spinning you around as your giggles filled the space.
Eddie’s grin faltered quickly. “I hate you,” He mocked in a serious tone.
 “I’m sorry, but I just love that worried look on your face. And, oh god, that sprint! You know what you should be?” You asked, a smirk forming on your lips as you waited for him to fall into your trap.
Eddie sighed exhaustedly, a grin plastered on his face, he put you down.
You squealed happily as he did so, “A... Tiger!” You mimicked pompoms with your hands as you tried to re-do your cheer routine, chanting after Eddie.
He playfully nudged your shoulders, “Oh, Pinky... You are on a roll today, huh?” He asked, the nickname rolled off his tongue so sweetly. It was a stupid fucking name, sure, but you loved it. It somehow stuck, the entire town calling you Pinky ever since you pronounced ‘Pinky Promise’ wrong once and your parents funnily referred to you by it.
You nodded, giggling, stealing the bottle from his hands, and chugging a sip. “This was a great idea.” You hummed, pointing to the bottle, the bitter taste burning your throat, almost coughing with how big of a chug you took.
He quirked his brows, flying over to your side as he opened your car door.
“Let’s go, thief.” He tilted his head, hands gesturing forward animatedly.
“What a gentleman!” You mocked dramatically, sliding into the messy van easily as Eddie heaved a sigh.
He sprinted toward the other door, cursing as he struggled to open the rusty door, eyes bulging out of his head almost as he checked to make sure the coast was clear. “You know…” He started with a muffled sigh as he hopped into the driver’s seat. 
“Everyone thought I would be a bad influence on you… or that you would at least be a good influence on me, but ever since I met you, all we have done is illegal shit.” His voice was mocking. “I think it’s time you give up that good girl cheerleader title, princess. Because forcing your best friend to steal booze is definitely not good girl material.” 
Throwing your hands up in defense, you turned to him. “And they still think you are the devil worshipper!” You added, a hearty laugh escaping from your slurry lips.
Eddie sighed when he couldn’t turn the ignition properly, his van—Aurora, which Eddie of course named himself—was too old now.
“Oh, come on, baby,” He whispered when his fingers roughly tried to turn the key further, earning a hesitant cough from his precious Aurora. “Pleasepleaseplease…” He whispered, engine roaring back to life now with his second try. “There you go, honey, thank you!” He exclaimed as he threw his hands up in the air, mouth quick to press up against the wheel, giving Aurora a thousand kisses, causing you to squint your eyes.
“You are… pathetic,” You scoffed with a shake of your head, a teasing smirk playing at your lips.
“Oh, we’ll see who’s pathetic,” He disagreed dramatically. His eyes diverted from the road as he sneakily grabbed your bag, causing you to protest quickly. “Hey!” He didn’t mind your tug on his bicep when he dug his whole arm into your bag, fiddling as he tried to find your cassette tape under all the mess.
“There we go,” He hummed when he animatedly pulled it toward your sight. ‘BEST MIXTAPE’ The tape dramatically read when Eddie snatched it out of your view stuffing it away from you. 
“If you make fun of Aurora, you lose your music privileges.” He hummed all-knowingly, a troublesome look overtaking his features as he focused back on the road. Your gaze squinted, barely able to see his plump lips that were now quipped into a grin.
“Really…” You hummed, hiding behind the way your lips twitched mischievously.
Eddie’s curiosity was quick to perk up; you not whining ‘Eds!!’ as you elbowed him and huffed when you called him a jerk meant only one thing.
You had some really good new music.
“You sure about that… Munson?” You quirked a brow, grin growing wider as you seized your bag from his hands, earning a groan from Eddie.
“What have you got up your sleeve, sweetheart?” He asked, stealing a quick glance at one of your pretty smiles before he turned his attention to the road.
“Something really good…” You hummed, hand diving into your bag again before you reclined in your seat, throwing him a knowing look.
“Jesus…” He whined. “What d’ya want?” He implored, his gaze squinting.
You wanted to keep the game going, tease him further, and get him to his breaking point. But the way his eye twitched with curiosity, tongue licking his lips with need made you want to tell him everything, let him in on your little surprise.
“Hmm… Music privileges…” 
“And?” He asked with a huff, knowing that’s not all you wanted.
“And, I’m gonna pick the place where we drink this cutie!” You exclaimed, hand pointing toward the tequila bottle you had a firm grip on.
He threw you a glare; it wasn’t a hard glare, you knew it and he knew it, he did it just to tease you, and that’s exactly what had you so giddy about him. “Fine…” He whined, teasing further. “Whatcha got?”
You clapped animatedly, pulling out the cassette with a huge grin. The Cure’s ‘The Head on The Door’ album was swaying in your hands as Eddie groaned.
You pouted. “You got me all excited for The Cure?” He pinched his brows together, causing you to gasp dramatically, huffing.
“What’s wrong with The Cure? You love them!” You protested, glaring at him.
“You love The Cure, sweetheart.” He grinned, earning a scoff from you as your hands were quick to wrap around your chest annoyedly.
“Just for that, you won’t get to know what the second album is. And it really was a good one.” You shrugged, putting the bag in front of your legs, just out of Eddie’s reach.
“Oh, come on!” He sighed, eyeing you with squinted eyes. 
“I was joking! I love The Cure.” He murmured, but you shrugged again, eyes falling toward the window as you started giving him the silent treatment playfully.
“Really?” He understood your play. “Jesus H. Christ.” He huffed, attention turning toward you.
“Just check the glove compartment.” You ignored him again.
“Pinky.” He called out. “Do it.” His eyes pointed toward it, causing you to sigh as you opened it unenthusiastically.
A bunch of cassette tapes fell toward your lap, you squealed at the contact. “Eddie!” You exclaimed with a chuckle.
Three Imaginary Boys, Seventeen Seconds, Faith, Pornography and The Top was sprawled across your lap, and your eyes widened.
The Cure’s discography. Just sitting in his glove compartment.
You turned to him with an affectionate gaze, hands covering your mouth as you stood speechless.
“Wh-what are these?” You were a stuttering mess. Did he really do all of this for you?
“Uh–I’m pretty sure those are albums, princess,” He mocked you in a playful tone as you tilted your head, tongue sticking out in a childish manner.
His smile grew wider before he shook his head. “Started collecting those–uh… after that day–uhh, you remember that?” His gaze avoided yours. 
“We–uh almost got kicked out of The Hideout?” He muttered with a sly grin, eyes focused on the road just so you wouldn’t notice the slight flush on his cheeks.
“Eds–” You attempted to speak, but he didn’t let you. “You remember that day? You asked me what my favorite band was?” You nodded furiously, Eddie didn’t even have to take another glance at you to know you had a warm smile on your face, sensing your head bobbing up and down excitedly. 
“Y-you know, before they tried to kick us out?” You gave him a slight giggle, humming.
“I told you mine was Dio. And you told me yours was The Cure?” A dizzying grin was stuck on your face, cheeks stretching with pain from how big it was. And Eddie knew if he looked, even for a split second, he’d fall for you all over again. He knew that he couldn’t contain those feelings inside of him anymore. So he avoided it. He avoided that one glance thrown your way because he didn’t want to lose you.
You bowed your head to say ‘yes’ again, words didn’t dare come out of your grinning lips. You didn’t know what to do; you wanted to hug him, feel his arms wrapped around you. You wanted to kiss his flushed cheeks and his apparent dimple, which you couldn’t get enough of.
The silence hanging in the air was killing you. “I remember.” You muttered, almost shyly, like the two of you weren’t teasing the hell out of each other mere seconds ago. 
His brows furrowed when you leaned over your seat again, digging something from your bag as you hid it behind you.
“That is why…” You smiled, hands shaking as you hid the cassette behind your back. “I got you this!” You exclaimed, swinging the tape in front of his bulging eyes.
His eyes squinted before the realisation set in. You remembered that day. Just like he did. You remembered his favorite band. Just like he did yours.
He didn’t want to get his hopes up, you were just being friendly, right? You didn’t do this in the same loving, caring way he did. You did this as a friend. You were a great friend. And he was an asshole for harboring these feelings for his best friend.
He couldn’t help the squeak that escaped his plump lips. The car came to a halt quicker than he intended it to. Swinging you over your seat, making you squeal with him.
“Jesus, Eddie!” You giggled, turning to face him and seeing his speechless face as he admired you. You could feel your cheeks heat up, and it was embarrassing.
Why did he have to look at you like that?
Why did he have to complicate things for you?
You wouldn’t be good enough for him.
And there was Billy. Billy. Billy. Billy—
Your inner thoughts were interrupted by his childlike screams as he seized the Sacred Heart album by Dio from your hands.
He didn’t hesitate—like you did—to engulf you in a hug. Hands securely resting on your lower back, and you could feel your breath hitch.
You would spend all of your work pay checks on stupid damn records if it meant you could see him like this again, and you’d happily starve if it meant you’d have him hug you like this again. But that’s what friends did, right? 
“Oh my god.” His eyes widened, tone much calmer before his excitement rose up again. 
“Oh my fucking god, Pinky!” He yelled in delight again, taking you by surprise when his hands were holding your shoulder in excitement. 
“Y-you… shit- you got this for me?” He asked with a sympathetic gaze.
You nodded quickly. “Of course!” 
“Why’d you think we had to steal that bottle?” You winked teasingly, causing him to snort.
“Pinky, you’re the fucking best.” He muttered into your hair, a grin overtaking your features when he held your face in his hands, honey-glazed eyes boring into yours.
“Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou.” His fast-paced mantra left you giggling again before he pressed a small, appreciative smooch on your forehead.
He was just being friendly, you thought. There was no way he could want something more. You were beyond fucked up for that, and Billy was the only proof you needed.
He sighed contently when he relaxed back into his seat. “Wherever you want to go, princess, let me know.” He winked with a childish smile.
The two cassettes were replayed over and over again before the two of you made your way to your ‘special destination’.
Dragging Eddie through the woods while he whined earned several giggles from you. He chugged the bottle in his hands with a sour face.
“How much longer do we have to fuckin’ walk?” He complained, his feet dragging on to exaggerate.  
“We’re almost there, you dork.” You squinted your eyes at another frustrated groan escaped his lips. Laughter erupting from your stomach teasingly before you handed him the stolen bottle, Eddie chugged quickly, and his face soured, “How did you even find this place anyway?” He asked.
“Skull Rock?” You asked, and he nodded. “Wait, you don’t know about Skull Rock?” You questioned, eyes widening, causing Eddie to roll his. “C'mon, Pinky, not all of us hang out with the prissy popular kids.”
You gasped and playfully but still harshly hit his chest, “Ow!” He flinched. “Shit, are all cheerleaders as heavy-handed as you?” He asked, furrowing his brows. “Hey, I barely touched you!” You smirked while he faked getting hurt, rubbing his chest mockingly.
“Skull Rock is known as the make-out spot of Hawkins.” You enunciated dramatically as Eddie ooh-ed, “Thanks to, ‘King Steve’”, you mocked, mimicking air quotes.
Eddie’s eyes widened. “Wait… wait,” His walking came to a halt when he tried to process that information. “Y-you and Steve?” He asked, dumbfounded, a slight overtone of jealousy was apparent in his tone, mixed with his own insecurities, and your face was quick to sour. “God, no!” You scrunched your nose; you loved Steve, but not in that way, never in that way.
“Who do you think taught him this place?” You tilted your brows. 
“I came here the first time my parents left with a tiny note stuck on the fridge.” You shrugged. You were used to your parents always leaving you without any notice other than a scribbled note that told you that they’d be gone for a while. And you never knew if it would be for days or for months. Now that they've been gone for the last four months, you assumed it was permanent this time, and even though you never admitted to it, it fucking hurt. Coming here has been your only escape lately. And all you wanted to do was share it with Eddie, have him in your comfort zone. 
Eddie’s face soured; you could see that red tint on his cheeks, almost like he was furious. And he was, because he understood. He understood what it was like to have deadbeat parents who were fucking useless, he understood the pain it brought and how it could make a person feel so fucking unwanted. But at least he had Wayne. You didn’t have anyone. The closest thing to you had that resembled a family were your friends and the Wheelers—and even that wasn’t enough to give him some peace of mind. 
“When Steve had his first heartbreak, I brought him here, but that fucker turned this place into an orgy party,” You continued, a simple chuckle escaping your lips. 
“And after that, people started coming here all the time for their little make-out sesh.” Your hands stretched forward to make a point, and you rolled your eyes. 
“Even Billy took me here one time,” You murmured the Billy part, wanting to avoid the talk with Eddie because you knew neither of them liked each other, and you rarely, if ever, spoke about him with Eddie, while Billy always announced his distaste for Eddie, murmuring about how it was obvious that the “freak” just wanted to get in your pants.
“You know, Billy is one of those people who think I’m a bad influence on you because I’m a “freak” and “devil worshipper,” right, sweetheart?” You avoided his gaze.
You didn’t want to talk about Billy, at least not with Eddie, and not now. You just wanted one thing to yourself without him being involved, which seemed impossible.
You forced a smile. “Well, Billy is…” an asshole, an idiot, and sometimes a fucking narcissist, you wished to say, but you didn’t want to drag Eddie into your relationship problems. Billy was still your boyfriend, and in all honesty, your on and off relationship was something that no one actually understood.
Nancy gave Billy a glare each time he came around, Steve and Robin constantly reminded you how awful he was. But it didn’t matter, because you couldn’t let him go, each time he fucked you up in a different way, you went back to him.
You took him back because you didn’t know any better, you accepted him because love was supposed to be like this, wasn’t it? It was supposed to be a challenge, it was supposed to be fucking hard. It was supposed to be something to fight for.
But it was so…exhausting. Trying to get him to understand you, trying to get him to care, trying not to make him mad—walking on egg-shells each time you were around him.
And everything was so fucking different with Eddie; things were so uncomplicated with him and so fucking fun. You didn’t want to admit that you wanted that… that you wanted him. 
Because he was easy—and in the best possible way. He was so easy to love. He was safe and he made you feel safe. When he caressed your back, when he opened a door for you, when he let you walk in front of him with his hand ghosting over your lower back, when you asked him to hold your bag and he swung it over his shoulder. He laughed at things easily, he made you laugh easily. He listened intently, when you just wanted to open up for a bit, he was quiet; when you needed someone to talk to, he gave you all the advice in the world.
And more than anything, Eddie cared. He cared about you, in a way you had never been cared for before.
He brought a side out of you that you never knew existed; relaxed. He was gentle with you, he knew how to joke around, and he didn’t have any problems being who he was. He was open and nice; he didn’t get angry at everything, and it was just… nice to be around him.
You shook your head at your thoughts, “Billy is Billy.” You concluded, eyes fixed on the ground. Eddie just gave you a small smile, as if he understood your train of thought. His hands caressed your back reassuringly in a way that was telling you that it was okay to think what you were thinking, and it brought an imminent smile to your face, knowing that he would always be there for you.
You remembered that night clearly when the two of you drank an entire bottle of booze you stole, and smoked Eddie’s stash, bodies lazily laying next to each other, Skull Rock had the best view, stars filled the empty sky, and a crescent moon appeared between them.
It was relaxing, lying with Eddie, high out of your mind.
“There’s no way you think Honeycomb Cereal is the best breakfast food.” You shook your head as Eddie scoffed.
“I do! It counts as breakfast, and you can also eat it as a snack on its own, what more do you need?” He raised his brows, taking a puff from the joint sitting between his index fingers.
“Uh? I don’t know, waffles? Eggs and bacon? Actual good cereal?” You mocked, causing Eddie to nudge your side lightly.
“Oh, and which cereal does the princess think is the best?”
“Cinnamon Toast Crunch, of course,” You said proudly.
“You are disgusting.” Eddie scrunched his face. You shrugged with a grin on your face as you snatched the joint from his fingers, reaching for the lighter in his hand. And before you could even light the blunt sitting in your fingers, the carved lighter caught your attention.
It was a silver Zippo lighter with a dragon print and had scratches all over it. You scrunched your brows as you looked up at Eddie and said, “What the hell is this?” You held the lighter up, and Eddie seized it from your hands.
“A lighter?” He replied smugly, causing you to huff, “Where did you even get it?” Your curiosity peaked.
“Bummed it off a guy at the bar last night, pretty fuckin’ cool, huh?” He asked, getting excited as he showed you the print, the carving of the dragon was so detailed that you could basically count its scales.
“Stealing is considered cool?” You murmured, causing Eddie to give you a huff as he placed the lighter on the rock between the two of you, allowing you to get a more detailed look. 
“Really, Pinky?” He almost snorted. “How about you answer that one, because the tequila bottle you’re holding wasn’t paid for... If I remember correctly,” He mocked a thinking face, dimples ever-so apparent as he tried to contain his grin.
“I–We!” You expressed in a higher tone, “Didn’t steal that bottle because it was cool, doofus. We! did it because we’re poor.” You enunciated the ‘us’ part again before nudging his rib slightly and prodding, earning a “Hey!” from Eddie, who was ticklish. 
“Anyway.” You giggled, handing the lighter back to him with a grin on your face, “Would’ve been cooler if it was pink.” Eddie gave you a weird look.
“What?” You implored, shrugging carelessly.
“Pinky liking pink… what a surprise, huh?” He said sarcastically, causing you to groan.
“Don’t be such a guy, Munson,” You warned, you liked pink, but both of you knew that wasn’t why the nickname stuck. And it didn’t matter what it truly meant because you liked it. You liked that it was the only thing you had from them that didn’t leave—something that was truly yours, something that would never abandon you. 
“Oh, you know that’s not why, you doofus.” You rolled your eyes. “Have you ever seen a pink dragon?” You gushed, and Eddie shook his head. 
“See! Case closed.” You grinned.
“Pink dragons are cool,” You said with a determined face, and Eddie couldn’t help the grin that was plastered onto his face now.
You spent the rest of the night giggling like a bunch of kids over nothing, the chilling breeze of the Hawkins nights providing comfort to you that you had never felt before.
When your shivers hadn’t stopped, you heard Eddie sighing, “Okay, you are getting my jacket,” He insisted, annoyed, because you had refused his offer for a jacket a million times just because you didn’t want him to be cold.
He rolled his eyes and shook his head before you could open your mouth to refuse. Calloused hands quick to securely wrap his infamous black leather jacket around you. You looked up at him, a sympathetic gaze apparent, as you tried to refuse, tried to insist that he would get cold, but he didn’t accept it. “Better I freeze off than you.”
Your heart fluttered before it was apparent on your face, lips twitching into a warm, sickly sweet smile as you accepted, “Thank you,” You murmured, almost shyly. The jacket fell comfortably on your shoulders, a whiff of weed, beer and the old leather smell engulfed you, warmth taking over your entire body.
You liked the feeling of wearing something that was his. In fact, you liked it too much. Something about Eddie always provided some sort of security for you. He made you feel comfortable in your skin, like he was meant to be there for you, like he was supposed to help you, even when you repeatedly told him you didn’t need it. You cleared your throat to gather your thoughts, taking the joint in his hands as your head slowly but comfortably fell on his shoulders.
Taking a puff from it, you looked over at Eddie. “As soon as I graduate, I’m leaving this place.” You could feel his head turn toward you, his gaze almost burning its way through your hair. 
“Eight months, eight fucking months left.” Your tone was the most serious he had heard that night, and he couldn’t help but have a baffling look on his face. You had mentioned something about ‘leaving this hellhole’ before, but he never knew how serious you were, at least until now.
He shook his head quickly to gather his thoughts. He didn’t want to make a big deal out of it and scare you away, so he shrugged. “Fine, but you can’t abandon me, I’m coming with you.” His tone was nonchalant, and it brought a smile to your face.
“I would never leave without you.”
NOW.
You shook your head at the memories, at least you had achieved one of those things. You got out of the hellhole that was Hawkins as soon as you graduated, being selfish enough to not care about the ones you had left behind, but you needed to do whatever you could to survive, and you shouldn’t have to apologize for it, right?
Right?
It’s what you kept repeating to yourself, but there was one part of you that always felt guilty for leaving without a goodbye, cutting off all contact. And that guilt returned with Nancy’s invitation; you knew you couldn’t hold off on her wedding, no matter how much you wanted to escape the town that caused you agony.
Nancy was your best friend when you were living in Hawkins, she was there with you through everything, and the Wheelers were there when your parents abandoned you, inviting you to their home as if it were nothing. 
You've seen Nancy, Jonathan, Steve, and Robin several times in the last couple of years. Especially after Nancy told them the exact reason why you left, they understood and welcomed you. 
That’s what you loved about them; even though you spent some time apart, they would always be your best friend. And that is exactly why Nancy picked you as her maid of honor—because she knew you’d always be there. She trusted you with her whole life, and so did you. The two of you knew things about each other that no one else did. 
And I'll leave you lyin' on the bed I'll be out the door before you wake
You huffed when you turned the stereo off, the lyrics giving you a stupid familiar  feeling, like it was written about you and Eddie. Like Axl and Izzy were hiding somewhere in the California apartment you and Eddie stayed in right after you left, as if they witnessed you leaving him there. 
The song became an afterthought when you realized you actually had to go in now or one of Wheeler’s snobby neighbors would surely call the cops on you for suspiciously watching the house while hiding in your car like a coward.
Eddie was already in there.
What if everyone else was there too? 
Would they cuss you out and tell you to fuck off? 
You surely deserved it.
You cursed yourself when you exited the car, feet dragging you all the way to the door, knowing that you needed to do this. Inhaling a deep breath, you rang the bell, even the tune sounded the same, and the guilt inside of you started rising up again.
“Will you get that?” Nancy’s screaming voice could be barely heard from your side of the door, and your eyes immediately pressed shut together.
Please don’t let it be Eddie. Please don’t let it be Eddie. Please don’t let it be Eddie. Please don’t let it be Eddie. Please don’t let it be Eddie. Please don't let it be Eddie—
When the door swung open, the eyes that met yours blinked quickly, not knowing whether they were imagining it or not.
Your blinking eyes were quick to open widely as well, and a sigh of relief left your chest.
It wasn’t Eddie.
But it still wasn’t any better. Your face was quick to feel hot as your gaze met hers, and you felt ashamed. Not knowing what to say, you murmured a simple “Hey.”
Max stood in front of you with an unreadable expression, and you were afraid. For the first time, you were afraid of her.
Was she going to slam the door in your face? Was she just going to ignore you? 
You bit your lip out of nervousness at the silence, and just as you were about to open your mouth again, Max squealed—which you had never, ever heard her do before—as she wrapped her arms around you in a jump-like hug.
Your breath got caught in your lungs, and a hearty giggle escaped your plump lips as you embraced it, melting into the hug. 
“I can’t believe it.” She squealed, pulling away from the hug to see your face fully again, her eyes almost prickling with tears.
Jesus. She had grown up so fast.
Her face that fell around your shoulders felt weird now that she was so much taller and much closer to you in height. She looked different, and you couldn’t decide whether to feel ashamed or guilty about it.
Your eyes widened, almost in shock, you never expected to be perceived in any way positively, especially by Max. And she could sense that shock on your face, with the way your mouth visibly stood agape. 
“You-uh… you’re not mad?” You implored, eyes almost widening with the need to know. 
Her eyes softened, and the sorrows in your heart were quick to dissipate with it, she shook her head lightly, almost in an all-knowing way.  “Uhm- I-I know what happened.” She almost whispered, gaze falling toward the kitchen, implying that Nancy had already babbled about the day you left. 
Damn you, Nancy Wheeler. 
Your head popped up toward the kitchen, where Nancy was, as if you were going to run up to her, your cheeks fluttered with embarrassment, you never wanted Max to find out. 
“Don’t… please don’t be mad at her.” She turned your attention back to her with a gentle touch on your arm, easing your tense body with just one touch. 
“If she didn’t tell me what happened… I don’t think I’d even talk to you, Pinky.” She admitted shyly, your gaze on her still widening. 
“Wh-what exactly did she tell you?” You asked, you weren’t going to get mad at Nancy, you knew she didn’t have any malicious intentions, you just never wanted Max to know what her step-brother did. At least not until she was much older. Your brain almost short-circuited as you looked at her once again. She was already much older; you knew Nancy made the right call.
“Not much!” Max blurted quickly, maybe to ease your worries; maybe it was the truth. 
“Just that- uh-that… Billy did something horrible, and that you and Eddie left and then uh… the two of you went to.. uh—Chicago?” She stuttered, head hanging low before she looked back at you, trying to read your expressions.
“California,” You muttered.  “Uh-Los Angeles, to be exact.” You breathed, correcting her. Did she know more? Did she also know that you left Eddie after that, too? Did she know that you had been carrying the guilt of leaving Eddie, her and those four little idiots too? The only ones you didn’t have any contact with in the last five years?
“Is that… is that where you are now?” Her brows pinched together; she knew where you were—New York, Nancy had told her. But she just wanted to hear more from you, and you could sense it. 
You shook your head. “New York.” Your lips pursed together, and she gave you a slight nod as if to ask if there was anything else going on in your life, you caught it immediately. “My cousin helped me get this apartment, and she, uh, has this record shop there.” Max gave you a tight-lipped smile.
“And, uh, it has like a tattoo shop behind it—records by day and tattoos by night.” You revealed more, awkwardly, your stupid joke made you want to hit your head against the perfectly white marbled walls of the Wheeler’s. “I’m actually training to become a tattoo artist now,” You said with your gaze stuck on how much she had grown now, almost feeling embarrassed for some reason before Max’s gasp turned your attention back to her.
“No way.”
“Dude, you’re still so fucking cool.” She nudged your shoulder, and your face instantly lit up. All the worries in your head disappeared, giddiness replacing it when you realized Max still saw you as her cool older sister.
“You think so?” You teased, giving her a light-hearted chuckle, “Uh… yeah? Dude, you work at a record store that has a tattoo shop in the back… you invented cool at this point.” She encouraged, surprise and fascination washing over her face.
“If Mad Max says so” You teased, muffling her hair and earning whines from her. 
And you hated that it took you back to five years ago. Every stupid fucking thing you saw or did in this town made you take a trip down memory lane, but it was the worst with Max, because almost every memory with her had your head wandering off to the certain redhead’s step-brother. A chill ran down your spine at the idea of him even being back in town. But there was no fucking way, right? 
You had heard from Nancy that the Mayfield-Hargrove’s had moved out and returned to California by the time Max started going to college—somewhere far away from them. However, she and the other kids always returned to Hawkins in the summer. You assumed she wanted to reunite with her friends and that she was trying to avoid the step-fuckers—a nickname Max herself gave both Billy and Neil Hargrove.
“He-uh… He doesn’t know about the wedding, right? Or he isn’t… he isn’t back in town? Is he?” You stuttered eerily; you knew Nancy would never invite him, but you still wanted to make sure that he didn’t know about it or that he wouldn’t know you were back in town.
“No—god, no.” Max shook her head quickly. “He’s in California with the ‘parents’.” She scoffed. “He has no fucking clue.” She added.
And you nodded simply; one of your worries was now at ease.
“What about…” You trailed off, pretending to sound nonchalant about wanting to ask about Eddie, you were anything but as you fiddled with your fingers.
Max picked up on it immediately. “Eddie?” she asked almost smugly, making you nod quickly—too quickly to appear nonchalant.
“Oh!” She grinned, making your cheeks feel hot.
Damn it. How did he still have this effect on you without even being present?
“He came like an hour ago. The last I saw him he was arguing with Dustin about their nerdy game.” She rolled her eyes slightly. 
“Oh, uhm, that’s—that’s good…” You said unsurely, you knew he was here, because of his stupid van that was parked outside just behind your car, but what the fuck were you even going to do when you did eventually see him. 
Would you pretend like nothing happened?
Would he pretend like nothing happened?
How the fuck were you supposed to do that when your feelings for him were still all over the place? You already felt dumb for not managing to get over him in the last five years, it just seemed impossible considering how things were left off.
You cleared your throat, turning your attention to Max. You didn’t need Eddie to cloud your mind right now, the guilt of abandoning Max still filled your stomach.
“Max…” You caught her attention softly, and almost as if she knew you were going to bring up the subject, a pout overtook her features. 
“I—I’m sorry…” You started, voice shaky. “I fucked up, I should have let you know... A message, a call, a note… Jesus—anything.” Your voice was meek, causing you to gulp.
“I should have done something, I—Fuck… I don’t know what to say, just that I’m really sorry.” You were stumbling over your own words when your vision got blurry, eyes glossy as you looked up at her.
“Pinky…” She muttered comfortingly, you didn’t expect this kindness from her that you thought you were unworthy of. You had left her without anything, and she still greeted you with open arms.
Maybe you were wrong. Maybe people could forgive you, maybe they could forget. Maybe Eddie would laugh it off. 
“I know that…” She offered a sympathetic gaze. “I knew deep down that you would never leave without a goodbye if it wasn’t important.” She gulped, physically, that familiar lump in her throat returned with the emotional weight her words held. 
“I’m not a kid anymore.” Max gave you a small smile. “I know how hard that must’ve been for you, okay?” Her hands were quick to take yours into hers, fingers gently soothing you. “I don’t blame you. So don’t fucking blame yourself… I know how you get.” Her hands stood on your shoulder now, shaking you lightly in the guise of making you feel better. 
A poor smile appeared on your lips, Max possibly didn't realize how much her words mattered to you, how you needed to relieve yourself of the guilt. One gesture from her almost enough to heal the wound that coming back to Hawkins split open deep inside of you. 
“Oh my god!” Nancy’s shriek caused you to turn around. 
“Pinky, finally!” Her voice beamed, and before you even got a chance to say anything, she engulfed you in a hug.
 “I was about to lose it,” She whispered into the hug before her eyes widened at you and Max.
“Shit…” She muttered, knowing Max had probably already told you that she blabbed about your disappearance.
“I was going to mention that…” She tilted her head adorably, a shy smile adorning her lips as you brushed it off with a laugh.
“Don’t worry about it, Nance.” You waved your hands in dismissal. “I can’t be pissed at you for anything… at least for the next five days…” You hummed. 
“You better use your wedding privileges wisely.” You said, throwing her a wink, as you pulled away from the hug. 
Your hands rubbed together quickly. “So... uh–where’s everyone?” You stammered, you were mostly asking about Eddie, but you also wanted to know where the hell Steve and Robin were. You missed those two idiots who were attached at the hip. They could calm you down better than anyone.
“The other kiddos are only going to be able to make it to the rehearsal dinner and the actual wedding.” She pouted, knowing that she planned a five day full of activities for all the people closest to her and Jonathan, but Mike, Lucas, El and Will were all going to miss it. 
She huffed. “And uhhh… Steve and Robin are coming later tonight.” 
“You remember we got that brunch thing at Steve’s tomorrow, right?” She asked, eyes squinting with doubt, before her arms crossed against her chest. 
You almost groaned, head falling back. Fucking Steve and his stupid brunch plan. 
“How could I forget?” You said through pressed lips, trying your best to seem enthusiastic, it wasn’t that you had a problem with it—it was because you were nervous, so fucking nervous to be in the same close proximity of Eddie again.
“And Jonathan should be...” She eyed the backyard. “Yup, in the backyard with the band. I left all the band planning to him.” She shrugged, making your eyebrows quirk. 
Shit. She really did fucking love Jonathan, didn’t she? She would’ve never let anyone meddle with her own plans otherwise. 
“Uhh–Dustin and… the others–” Her voice slightly cracked, and you instantly knew she was talking about Eddie. 
“They’re-uh they’re just in the basement… uh—getting something I needed.” She nervously scratched her head. “I’m sure they’ll—uh… say hi when they can.” She gave you a nervous smile, eyeing Max before turning her attention to you.
And just like clockwork, just as Nancy started to babble more about the plans she had for the five days you were supposed to be in Hawkins, her words were quickly interrupted by the loud voice of Dustin, “Shut up!”
“Shut the fuck up!” He exclaimed excitedly as you gave him a slight giggle.
“I wasn’t talking,” You joked, and before you could get another word out, Dustin squeezed you in a tight hug, causing more giggles and excited squeaks to escape your lips.
“Looks like somebody missed me, huh?” You raised a brow.
“What have you been up to, Dustybun?” You asked with a sly smirk, causing Dustin to cringe at the nickname.
“Me? Jesus, you’ve been gone for five years, and you’re asking what I’ve been up to?” You shrugged.
“Where the fuck have you been?” You couldn’t pinpoint if it was genuine curiosity or a slight anger lingering in his tone.
“New York,” Max spoke before you, the attention in the room shifting towards her. 
“She’s a tattoo artist now.” She exclaimed excitedly, causing Dustin’s eyes to widen.
“You?” He questioned, causing Nancy to join in and nod in excitement.
“No fucking way!”
“Well, I’m not exactly—”
“Dude, that’s so fucking cool!” Dustin gushed, interrupting you.
“Man, I knew those sketches were too cool to let them go to waste on Eddie’s bedroom walls,” He snorted, but your brows quipped, his bedroom walls? Did he still keep those? 
“You have to tattoo me,” He raved, interrupting your thoughts as you stared at him in disbelief.
“No way, do you want Miss Henderson to kill me?” You huffed, crossing your arms against your chest.
“Oh, come on, just one little favor?” He pouted.
“Nuh-uh! The last time you asked me for a favor, she chided me for months, months!” You emphasized, “She even left me one too many voicemails scolding me!” Dustin sighed.
 “How about something not-too-big? Like the bat one you did for Eddie, it looks so fucking—”
“You talkin’ bout me, Henderson?” A voice rang from the basement, and the slight sound of his footsteps dragging closer and closer toward the two of you caused you to stop dead in your tracks. You always knew Dustin was too loud for his own good.
You gulped, physically, and that lump in your throat reclaimed its place, his voice caused further suffocation in your throat, not being able to breathe when you could recognize that husky tone anywhere.
But it felt different.
Something about him felt different.
Your brain was struggling to comprehend a thought, your mouth had dried up, and it was getting harder to breathe.
“Dude... you could not rock a tattoo like me, no matter how fuckin' hard you—” And there was a pause, a small hitch in Eddie’s breath, as he finally realized who Dustin was talking to. And you could feel that hesitation, that uncomfortable tension filling the room that was once comfortable.
“Pinky?” You could recognize him just by his footstep alone, but now you’re sure it’s him, the nickname still rolling off his tongue so easily and sugary, like you had never left, like everything was okay again.
You’re slow to turn to face him, heart pounding with worry before you fully take him in, trying to decide his facial expressions, waiting for the anger, disappointment, shame, and fury.
You cannot place what his gaze holds, but you have missed the small glimmer in his eyes, the same one he always had when he saw you, so promising, so mellow that you feel your heart tightening.
You take him in now more than ever, his cheekbones are hollow and his face is more defined. He has so much more muscle on him, and it makes you question how long he has been working out.
His hair still lays messily on his forehead, bangs framing his face perfectly. Black jeans paired with a band-tee, and not just any band-tee, a Corroded Coffin shirt that unintentionally has you smiling. His dark brown eyes are mesmerizing as ever, eyelashes fluttering as he tries to accept the sight in front of him. Trying to make sure that he isn’t hallucinating, that you are actually here.
He looks good, so good that you can feel your mouth dry up, words getting stuck in your throat, the guitar pick necklace adorning his neck makes you want to pull him closer toward you.
You study him more than you should; those deep brown eyes are staring at you like a deer in headlights.
When he takes a step closer, gaze still locked to yours, you feel as if your souls have made a bridge, one you weren’t sure if you would be able to mend.
Close. He’s very close, but still, not close enough, not to your liking anyway. You want to be close enough to take him in wholly; you want him to engulf you in his arms, protecting you from all that’s bad in the world, feeling every ounce of him. The one person you had been yearning for was standing a foot away from you, and it was truly painful.
“You came,” Was all that left his plump lips, his gaze was still soft. He was as nervous as you are, something that you didn’t manage to pick up on. 
If only he knew why you had to abandon him, maybe he would understand… Maybe he would even rid you of your guilt.
“Y-yeah, I did,” You stuttered.
“Max, Dustin!” Nancy announced. “Why don’t you two help me in the back?” Nancy threw a look that both of them understood immediately, running off after her without another word exchanged.
The incessant throb in Eddie’s heart returned when his attention turned back to you, he knew you would come, but he didn’t know how much that would crush him.
That rage in him, bubbling up at the surface, subsided quickly when you gave him that gentle look. “What’s Dustin yapping about?” He asked with a chuckle, attempting to lighten the mood and ease his own worries.
“Oh— uhm… just that he wanted me to tattoo him,” You couldn’t help the nervous crack in your voice.
“You? Oh my god, you finally did it?” 
“Well… not exactly.” You gave him an awkward chuckle. “I’m training to be one, though.” You shrugged. 
“You know I’m a happy customer of yours.” He gave you a smile before he flashed his forearm, showing you the bat tattoo that you gave him five years ago.
He had much more tattoos now, but the bat tattoo you gave him still stood out among the thousand others on his forearm, at least it did to you. “Oh!” He breathed, attention diverting to something else as his hands fiddled behind him. He dug them in his back pocket, he struggled to get something it out. “Aha!” He exclaimed, waving the worn out notebook in front of your curious gaze. “But I’m definitely not giving you the ‘Promise’ notebook back!” 
Your pupils dilated at the sight; he still had it. He still had the notebook that your stupid sketches were sprawled all over. You gave it to him sometime during senior year, when he was having some trouble with his songwriting process. Your parents got you that notebook as a joke as soon as they saw the handwritten ‘Promise’ on the front, a silly play on your nickname. And you wanted him to have it; you wanted it to inspire him as much as it did you; your art mattered, and you wanted him to see that, so did his. 
“You… you still have that?” You asked, an astonished look still not leaving your features. “Yeah, it really played a key role on our first album.” He beamed. A crimson red blush was quick to wash over his cheeks; he wasn’t sure if he should’ve told you that or let you in this quickly when you left him on a whim in LA. 
“But… that’s— that’s still so fucking cool, Pinky,” His eyes widened, he shook off his thoughts in a flash. He had missed you, so fucking much—more than he let you on.
“So I’ve been told.” You meant to sound nonchalant. 
“What have you been up to?” You asked as if you didn’t know, as if you didn’t try to gather some information about him from Nancy and Jonathan. As if you didn’t listen to their album the second it came to your record shop.
“Just making some music, here and there.”
It was a lie.
He knew it was a lie, and you knew it was a lie.
Eddie made it big after the last time you saw him, signing onto the biggest record label and releasing an album that became way bigger than even his group had intended to.
“You don’t have to be so humble, I know how big you guys have made it.” You offer him a slight smile.
“Maybe a little bit.” He gestures with his hands, causing you to giggle. “Even had a gig here last week, the crowd was crazy.”
“It’s funny, though.” He murmured, causing you to raise your brows. “All the fuckin’ people at Hawkins who called me a freak and tried to shun me out was screaming my name... pretty weird fuckin’ feeling, huh?” He shrugged.
“I guess I know how the popular princess feels now,” He teased.
You nudged him slightly, “Guess you’re the popular boy of Hawkins now, huh?” He gave you a slight smile, and it felt comfortable, he was so easy to be with.
“Yeah, Jonathan worked really hard to get us for this wedding thing, you know?” He joked, giving a slight smirk.
“You and Jonathan, huh?”
“I don’t even know how you guys became best friends.” You added, wanting to joke.
“Yeah, I guess a lot happens when you don’t abandon people.” Ouch. You guessed you had deserved that one, but it still hurt to see him think of you this way, the entire atmosphere of the room had shifted, the casual conversation you had wasn’t as genuine as you thought it was, and you could see that he was hurt.
You knew he would be angry, but this seeming grudge wasn’t what you were hoping for. Maybe it was selfish of you, but you wanted him to miss you, tell you that he wanted to be with you, engulfing you in his arms as he spun you around, muttering how much he loved you.
But that wasn’t realistic, was it?
You gulped, feeling awkward, and now it was Eddie’s turn to feel bad. He internally cringed as he saw the look on your face, he knew that look so well. The way you played with your hair for some sort of comfort, he could sense that the guilt was eating away at you.
“I— I guess I deserved that.” You forced a smile, chuckling ironically, sensing the visible shift in Eddie’s face, the initial shock of reuniting with you wearing off, and his anger and hurt taking over. 
The tension that lingered in the air was interrupted by Jonathan swinging open the sliding door in the backyard and the four people standing behind him.
Before you could comprehend who they were, a squealing voice caused you to turn around, and a blonde-haired woman brushed past you. “Eds!” She called out, walking toward Eddie.
You looked up to see Jonathan leading Gareth, Jeff, and Frank to the backyard, telling them something about their gig, but you could care less as you stood still in your place, eyes glued on how Eddie greeted the girl, focus shifting solely on her as his hands caressed her shoulders, comforting her, as if you weren’t there, as if he didn’t care.
That screeching voice sounded familiar, but you couldn’t tell who the hell she was supposed to be when all you could see was her back and Eddie’s hands ghosting over her waist.
You were starting to feel small, trapped in your own body, with nowhere to go. Why was she hugging Eddie? Why were they so fucking close?
When she finally turned around, tucking her straight blonde hair behind her ears, glimmering blue eyes met yours, and you immediately realized who it was.
Chrissy.
The same Chrissy that was your supposed friend in high school, the same Chrissy who suddenly turned on you and made your life a living hell in senior year.
That’s why you didn’t recognize her—the strawberry blonde color she had was now more vanilla, and you hated to admit that she looked pretty—too fucking pretty.
Your eyes were narrowed with distaste; you had no right to be jealous, but you were powerless against that ugly emotion when it came to Eddie, swelling your chest way quicker than you intended to and stinging you harder as you struggled to keep a forced smile on your lips. 
Huffing, your mind drifted to Eddie. Surely he wouldn’t want anything to do with her, you decided. He knew some of the horrible things she did to you during your senior year, so there was no fucking way he would want anything to do with her.
Right?
“Oh my god, Pinky!” She squealed once again when she saw you, and you wanted to chuckle bitterly. With your tongue rolling inside your cheek, you tried to keep your damn mouth shut. She didn’t get to call you that nickname. Not when she did all of that during your senior year.
You didn’t return the hug she forced you into, eyes drifting to Eddie who was now avoiding your gaze. Lips pursed shut as he twisted his rings. Something weird was going on, and your stomach churned at the thought.
When Chrissy’s forced embrace on you ended, you barely forced a smile, and with a dead look on your face, you waited for her to disappear.
Why was she even here?
Who even invited her?
Running up to Nancy and asking her what the fuck she was thinking inviting her here would’ve been an exaggeration, you realized.
As envious thoughts sank further and further into your head, you realized something was wrong now. The way Chrissy leaned in to whisper something in Eddie's ear, giggling as she threw her head back.  
It meant something. It was like a sick feeling of deja-vu. A sinking feeling twisted your stomach, and a pang of insecurity gnawed at it. Your jaw clenched involuntarily; Eddie didn't even spare a glance in your direction. His attention was fully on her, and a wave of rage surged within you, threatening to overflow. The need to separate them, to pull her away from him, was almost unbearable.
Still, you knew you couldn’t do anything, and that was what made your blood boil, Eddie was nothing to you, he wasn’t even a friend to you—at least not anymore, something that you made sure of five years ago.
And before you could say or do anything more,
Chrissy smashed her lips against Eddie’s.
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famemonsterrr · 9 months
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Astrology observations part 11;
(Don’t copy my work pliz and these aren’t facts but what I have seen and experienced in my life. If you can’t relate to any of these. It okay we are all different)
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-Pisces are really good gaslighters like they argue and they know they losing and then boom…you are the one who is crazy. (Girly pops how about stop it)
- speaking of Pisces…maybe I’m saying it from personal experience but I can’t keep an aesthetic and even when I have find a aesthetic Im changing again. It’s endless circle…I hope another Pisces can relate with me:)
- i have seen an Aquarius women being so quick minded and have unique takes but also I have seen Aquarius women being really shy and slow to talk. There is no between with them.
- y’all think that Taurus are the lazy and don’t like to work out but they are so active and most of them love sports or gym.
- the second best venus is cancer…soooo giving soooo sweet and lovinggggg 🥰
- Aries placements show PASSION in any planet/house they are placed . Like if you have Aries moon you will be really vocal about ur emotions. If you have mercury then you will be passionate about ur opinions ect.
- Taurus and libra are the type of people who are seductive and flirty so naturally but if doesn’t work out they will be so pissed.
- Pisces are insane when they getting obsessed with something they like. They will make sure everyone in their group will know what new show/book/character ect. they started liking.
- Aquarius placements are the type of people who love anything that has to do with universe,planets ect. (Some of them people I know they follow on Instagram space accounts or nasa)
- Capricorn mars are workaholic…they always do things right to get where they want. (A placement that I kinda wish i had) "money money money must be funny in the rich man’s world"
- It’s from my personal observation but we tend to connect mostly with singers that have the same moon sign as we do. Maybe I’m the only one but from day 1 I loved they way Ariana grande was expressing her emotions through music and then I released we both have libra moon. So next time check the moon sign of ur fave artist 🤌🏻 (it’s my showing that I’m a big Ariana girly)
- Scorpio Venus people are my favourite cause they like you a lot and they know it but you don’t know it. They will not let you go and if they do they will return back to you no matter what. They will know everything about you and ask a lot about you. They will care about your opinions (when they really don’t care about others). They will share the darkest secrets with you,they personal/family traumas. They are consumed by your existence. (if they have Sagittarius placements maybe they will pretend not care at the same time so you might think u are just friends)
- speaking of Venus…if you are a Scorpio pliz find a Pisces Venus for you. Like insane connection. Soulmate energy and both consumed by each other. (My personal fave duo)
- Gemini Venus need to be studied cause they rush into love and at the same time they can’t settle. (Girly pops maybe decide for once but men are the worst)
- cancer mercury is more dramatic than a Leo but they don’t show it that easily.
- they say don’t date someone who has the same moon sign as you…but I disagree. You will be the same page and react the same way. Understanding from both sides. ( my ex bestie has libra moon and we understood each other so well). Maybe date or hang out with people that have the same moon as you.
- Sagittarius mercury/Venus flirts for joke but they do it so well that you fall for them and then they have to run away from you.
That’s all💙
Here is my masterlist
Thank you for reading my blog so far. Really grateful about that 🫶🏻 and sorry if I do spelling mistakes but I’m not Native American speaker so I try my best. Stay hydrated and healthy 💙
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rkvriki · 1 year
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— boyfriend things enha does ! - hyung line
hey everyone!! surprise im alive!! i still have a request to finish but it's been hard writing it and this idea rushed to my head and i just had to do it 😭
make sure to leave feedback. my resquests are open and so is my talk box so let's talk!
WARNINGS ! might be slightly suggestive; might contain grammar errors.
word count: 1.1k
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LEE HEESEUNG !
— leaves his hoodie at your house
to me this seems like such a heeseung thing to do.
he lives to see you dressed in his hoodies outside of your home, like, he loves when you go over to the dorms or when you go on a date and you wear his hoodies.
bonus: he loves it when someone notices it’s his hoodie and says something about it and he can proudly show that person you’re his partner!
when sleeps over at your house he takes an extra sweater or shirt to purposely leave his hoodie in your house.
when you wear it he’s like “oh my god, can’t believe i left another hoodie at your house.” and you act like you don’t realize it’s on purpose just to let him have his moment.
— keeps a hand on your back when you guys are out
heeseung can be a little possessive over you sometimes in a non unhealthy way.
he does this mostly when you are at social events or at a party, just out somewhere. he does it kinda unconsciously to be honest, but when he sees someone get their eye on you he will definitely do it on purpose to make the other person realize you are his.
you don't mind it, like at all. when you feel his hand resting on your back you’ll tense a little at the touch, and when he’s feeling like teasing you, he’ll trace his hand up and down your back in a teasing way, touching you with just the tip of his fingers and his nails slightly scratching your skin, to make you shiver, knowing how it gets you.
PARK JONGSEONG !
— hugging you randomly from behind
jay loves back hugging you.
no matter what you are doing he will be wrapping his arms around you waist and nuzzling his head on the crook of your neck and might leave little kisses on your neck and jaw.
you’re making a phone call and you’re walking around the house? he’ll be clinging to you.
you’re cooking? he’s right behind you.
you’re just standing looking at whatever? he's hugging you.
he just loves feeling you against him.
sometimes when he’s feeling needy he will come behind you and slowly wrap his arms around your waist and will rub his hands all over your lower torso, while leaving open mouthed kisses on your neck and sometimes licking and sucking the area, knowing it’ll make you feel hot and feeling uneasy.
— always asking for your opinion on his outfits
as we all know and i’ve talked about before, jake loves fashion and his clothes are a very prized possession for him.
everytime you sleep over and you go out he’ll show you different outfits and will model for you so you can give an opinion and choose the best one.
sometimes he’ll be like
“ok the one you chose is good, but what if i wore it with the shirt of that one and-” 
he’ll start ranting and explaining how the color scheme and whatever things you’re not really listening because he looks so good with the outfit and you can’t focus on anything but him.
SIM JAEYUN !
— kissing you out of the nowhere
when i look at jake i can’t think of anything else but his plush lips and how soft they might feel and i know i’ve written so many things about kissing jake but can you blame me??
jake is very aware you find his lips attractive so he’ll use them to tease you in more than one way.
sometimes you both are just chilling on the couch and he will start trailing his lips up your neck and will start leaving soft marks on your most sensitive spots.
he smirks to himself when you move your neck to give him more space to kiss and sees you rubbing your thighs together, giving himself a reminder to help you later on.
he’s such a tease for no reason, he’ll do this and when the good part is coming he just steps back and smiles at you like he did nothing, making you scowl at him.
— shows up to your home unannounced
jake is the type to miss you and go straight to your house without texting you.
you will be at home doing work or whatever and he’ll be knocking at your door when you least expect it.
you don’t even get surprised anymore, you’re so used to it by now, he should just move in at this point 🙄
if you are lucky enough he will bring you a present, which are mostly plushies. you have a huge plushie collection, because anytime he goes to an arcade with the boys he makes sure to always win one for you and will proudly give it to you and tell you how he easily won the game, even though he almost cried while playing because of how hard it was.
PARK SUNGHOON !
— will give you private serenades
what’s better than to have a boyfriend who sings?
he started doing this in the early days of your relationship when he wanted to get your pants (jk)
but it did start that early and he just made it a routine for you. he acts like he doesn’t like doing it but deep down he loves seeing your heart eyes looking at him while he sings for you.
when he’s feeling nice he will have you with your head laid in his lap while you look up at him and he sings something for you.
sometimes you ask him to sing you to sleep, since his voice calms you down and even though he rolls his eyes, you see the corners of his lips rise the slightest bit.
— takes you on road trips
sunghoon loves traveling and he loves traveling with you!
whenever he knows he knows enhypen will have a longer rest break he will take that as an opportunity to take you on a road trip.
you have visited the most famous places in korea since he can’t take you out of the country just when he pleases he will opt to just take you to korean places.
he loves taking you to places where it snows a lot, so he can take you snowboarding with him and teach you. teaching to him means laughing his ass off when you fall flat on your face.
he also takes you to beachy areas, because he loves seeing how happy you get when you play in the water (sorry if you don’t relate to this tho!)
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1K notes · View notes
atinyniki · 4 months
Note
Hihihi<3 I was thinking of Seungmin or Lee know (you can chose) with a idol!Gf that gets hurt during a award show.. maybe falling off a wobbly platform 8ft in the air? (We don’t brear our back). What would his reaction be? I know it’s kinda cruel but Its been on my mind for a week.. if it makes u uncomfy ignore this and forget u ever read it<3 Ty in advance<333
i'll take care of you.
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group: stray kids !
pairing: idol!kim seungmin x idol f!reader
genre: hurt/comfort, angst, fluff
warnings + additional info: reader is referred to as y/n, crying, reader fractures her ankle, kissing, play fighting, seungmin wants to murder someone, reader falls from a platform, lots of petnames, just rlly cute and fluffy at the end, seungmin is really scared, injuries, established relationships, munhee is a member of y/ns gg.
authors note: ik this was supposed to be more angsty but im literally head over heels for softie seungmin so here you go :P thank you for the ask annonie !! this is also not proofread. english is not my first language, so please excuse any grammatical or spelling errors. happy reading :)
wc: 1344
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“hey hey hey, don’t be nervous my love… you’ll do amazing, i know it.”
“i’ve never done this in front of such a crowd before… what if they don’t like me, min?”
“oh baby… they’ll love you, i promise. and if anything happens on stage, your members will be there to back you up, yeah?”
you give him a hug, he always knew how to calm you down in moments like these. you suppose it’s because of his own experiences, especially considering the amount of award shows he’s been at. 
“i love you, seungminnie…”
“i love you too, baby. now go! you don’t wanna miss your cue. i’ll be in the audience, i promise.”
you give him a quick kiss, shooting up from the seat to go meet your members. seungmin leaves too, sitting down at stray kids’ respective table.
“excited?”, jeongin asks from beside him.
“of course i am! i’m so proud of her…”
his eyes stay fixed on the stage, waiting for your performance to start. the lights dim, and he sits up straight. it’s time for your performance.
there’s no point in recording, he knows they’ll have a fancam. right now, he just wants to watch his baby shine. 
and you do. you look absolutely gorgeous on stage, the lights hitting you at the perfect angles. the track starts, and the crowd starts cheering.
so many people, just for five girls performing. the first song is a ballad, something slow to set the mood. it’s one of your favorite songs from the comeback.
though munhee wrote the song due to her own experiences, your voice carries the same amount of emotion hers does, and it makes the lyrics sound so much more authentic.
seungmin watches from the crowd, he truly thinks he might cry. the rest of the boys are in awe too, some members of gidle clasping their hands over their mouths in surprise.
everyone is used to you doing intricate dances with upbeat music, and they’ve truly never been able to appreciate your vocals.
then it hits the climax of the song, ending with a high note you must complete. as scared you are of heights, you know it’s inevitable. the platforms will go up, whether you like it or not.
its a small space that you have to maintain, but you try your best to focus on the song. and now, you have to sing.
you close your eyes, letting out your voice, and it sounds absolutely angelic. and then you open them again once you hear the low whirring of the platforms.
they all go up. 
except for yours.
nonetheless, you continue singing, determined to keep your professionalism throughout the entire bridge. and then the song ends. the platforms finally lower back down, and all of you wait for your cues to leave.
once you see it, you take a step.
you shouldn’t have.
all of a sudden, your platform shoots all the way up. eight feet in the air. before you have time to process, it wobbles side to side and you fall off.
thud.
seungmin stands up instantly, rushing to get backstage. he doesn’t care how many people hes pushed and shoved, but he needs to know that you’re okay.
and then a shrill scream fills the air, and his heart stops. it feels like your entire foot is about to fall off, the pressure from your fall crushing it under your weight.
he continues running as fast as he can, getting backstage before you can even blink. “baby? oh my god…”
you’re still crying from the pain, being set onto a stretcher for your leg. “it hurts…”
“i know baby… i know. you’ll be okay…”
they finally get you onto a comfortable bed, evaluating the damage to your ankle. luckily there’s no blood, the medics assume that it’s broken.
“seungmin… you’re on soon.”
“i’m not performing. jeongin’s filling in for me today.”
“what? but you practiced…”
“please… let me stay. i just want to help you feel better…”
you grab onto his hand, trying your best to reassure him that you’re okay. he doesn’t budge, so you just give up on it. 
“you did amazing, angel.”
“thank you…”
“no, really. i mean it. you kept it incredibly professional out there. plus the song was way outside your comfort zone, it was just amazing to hear you sing like that.”
“seungmin…”
“i’m going to kill whoever fucking did that to you. normally they’re more careful with these things… i should’ve had them double check or something. i’m sorry”
“hey, it’s not your fault. please don’t worry… it’s just my ankle. i’ll be fine, really.”
“but you’re hurt. if we had done a test before to check… maybe you wouldn’t have to be here…”
you smile, grabbing onto his hand and bringing it up to your lips to plant a small kiss over his wrist. “it was just a malfunction. it was out of our control, min.”
he clutches onto your hand tighter, his heart fluttering when he looks at you again. the black lightning-like streaks paint your face, eyes still slightly glossed over and nose red.
you’re so worn down, but you still look beautiful as ever. he prefers you like this, natural and authentic. you still look just as beautiful, but the black streaks have his heart clenching.
suddenly, he gets up, picking you up and moving you to the side a little. he’s extra careful not to apply any pressure to your ankle. he knows you’re in enough pain already.
he sits down in the empty space next to you, pulling your head to his chest. “you promise you’re okay? no discomfort?”
“it hurts of course, but other than that, no.”
“i’m so sorry…”
“baby, it’s really not your fault.”
he rubs up and down your arms, more so to soothe himself rather than you, and you smile up at him. you place a small kiss on the corner of his lips, as far as you can reach without moving your legs.
“i’m okay…”
“i love you, gorgeous.”
“i love you too, minnie.”
the medics finally come back, telling you that it’s only a fracture. you’re lucky you don’t need a cast, but you still need to heal for a little while.
“thank god you’re okay…”
“seungmin—“
“you’re not going anywhere without me for the next couple days, okay? i’ll take care of you, i promise…”
“seungmin, you really don’t have to—“
he cuts you off again.
“but i want to.”
you giggle again, you didn’t think he’d react this way. but of course he was going to be overprotective, what did you expect?
you lean over to plant one more kiss onto his jaw, and he pulls you onto his lap. “seungmin, i think you’re more upset about this than me…”
“of course i’m upset! they hurt my baby…”
“it doesn’t even hurt that bad anymore… im fine. you don’t have to worry about me.”
he pulls you flush against his chest, nuzzling his face into your neck. you giggle at him, a little confused as to why he’s licking you, but you stop once you realize that it’s not saliva.
they’re tears.
“it could have been so much worse…”
you wipe the tears from his face, smiling once you see him clearly again. “why are you crying?”
he sighs lightly, giggling when he realizes how he’s acting. “nothing, i’m just… glad you’re okay.”
you smile at him, holding his hand again and trying to sit up. it doesn’t work of course, seungmins arms are wrapped tightly around your waist.
“let me go!”
you thrash around in his arms, but he only holds onto you tighter, giggling as he watches. 
“seungmin!”, you whine.
“they said you needed rest!”
“that doesn’t mean you have to be completely attached to me!”
he rolls his eyes playfully, planting a kiss onto the top of your head. “actually, thats exactly what it means.”
“i hate you, kim seungmin.”, you grumble. you turn to look at him, scoffing once you see him wink.
“love you too, babe.”
<3
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344 notes · View notes
vendetta-ari · 2 months
Note
Your fav anon is backkkkk! Hey Love! May I request a Vox (and you can include Lucifer too) x Artist (f!) reader headcannons? As I’ve said before, take your time! ♡ ♡
UGHH OH MY FUCKIN GOD IM SO SORRY IT TOOK ME THIS LONG TO GET TO YOUR ASK BRO ILYSM ANON TYSM FOR YOU PATIENCE UR FRFR MY FAV ANON ♡♡♡
anyways, here Luci + Vox x artist reader
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Lucifer
~ Lucifer and you always create and paint things together, he loves your creativity and he adores your art
~ You and Luci exchange ducks on special days, like valentine's day,  Christmas, and birthdays.
~ You always exchange art tips with each other,  bother being artists and your own unique ways.
~ Many times you have painted Lucifer's ducks for him when he's feeling down.
~ You two took a picture on your anniversary and you printed it out and painted it, he hangs it up on his wall and he always says its “The best thing I've ever, ever owned my dear!” he always gets all cheery and smiles when he sees it
~ You paint lucifers nails for him, last time you made a lil duck design on them
~ People can always tell when you two have been hanging out because the two of you are all giggly and smiling covered in paint
~ You painted a mural in his room, an apple using both his and your favorite colors
~ you give all your art pieces to Luci, you tried to sell one of them and the poor guy almost cried
~ he's basically drowning in your paintings and all your artwork, he doesn't mind at all though. although he is running out of space…
~ whatever he'll just expand his room to fit more of your work.
~ you have forced Lucifer to let you do makeup on him, he wasn't too happy but you laughed your ass off at his annoyance and makeup covered face
~ He cant stay mad at you for too long though, when your mad at luci you'll grab one of his ducks and paint them a different color completely and rub paint off some off his other ducks
~ when you finally calm down you repaint all for them with him though, as an apology. 
~ the two of you often take walks through the rings of hell for inspiration 
~ surprisingly, the screams of everyone being tortured is great to get those creative juices flowing
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Vox
☆ Now let's be for real here guys, Vox can't draw for shit, so him being with an artist reader is kinda cute and unique and funny
☆ But you on the other hand, “your art is beautiful! n’ it should be hung up in a museum or something like that doll, I seriously dunno how you do it”
☆ During certain shows where they need sets, props, or anything related to that, you'll be the one painting them being the first to volunteer  you totally didn't draw a dick kn one of the sets and embarrass him on live television pft- noo psh- hah why would you ever do such a thing? it must've been val!
☆ You couldn't keep your laughter when Vox drew that picture of Alastor when be was throwing his hissy fit on live television 
☆ you redraw a picture of Alastor for Vox to tear up crumble and kick around as a stress reliever 
☆ Vox realized that you drew a picture of Alastor, didn't matter what it was for you still drew him, just then he got angry again and demanded that you draw a picture of him
☆ just one more thing to stroke his ego I suppose 
☆ You and velvette are besties, she often steals you away from Vox so you two can draw up outfits
☆ and he totally doesn't ever never get mad at her because of that
☆ You often draw in a red and blue journal Vox gave you as a gift once, it was in a whim but you still love it dearly 
☆ you draw pictures of him and you together with little hearts around them, but vox doesn't need to know that
☆ but one time he did look through your journal, out of curiosity. trying to hide the blush that spread across his face, he grabbed a pen and wrote little messages on a few of your doodles "Didn't know she was that obsessed with me" he mumbled under his breath while flipping through the pages
☆ “We're gonna recreate this photo tomorrow,  meet me at my office in 4:00 dollface” -Vox
☆ when you noticed the note you almost lost your mind fangirling over this TV man
☆So you did as you were told and met him at his office, getting there a little bit early
☆ And just like that he picked you up and carried you bridal style to his chair, kissing you softly all over, with you giggling and blushing, creating your drawing perfectly.
-xoxo, Ari
198 notes · View notes
calumcxke · 8 months
Text
COME OVER AND LOVE ME
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basketball player!taehyun x fem reader
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genre: best friends to lovers, slight idiots to lovers, fluff, slight angst
word count: 5.2k
summary: after mulling over taehyun for years, am oppurtunity to confess your feelings presents itself, but things take a bad turn
warnings: kissing?, mature language, beomgyu's kinda a menace, real teenage romance movie vibes, not rlly proofread
notes: for my bestie @bluetyunhour ,, <3 also my first time ever actually posting a fanfic,, im scared lol
 ♫: playlist
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you loved taehyun. 
he was your best friend, and had been your best friend for as long as you could remember. he was your comfort, your safe space, and just an amazing person.
your wide-eyed, curious best friend.
you weren’t aware when- but your feelings for him changed. all of a sudden, he wasn’t just your best friend, he was someone you wanted to be something more with. 
maybe it was when he joined the basketball team sophomore year. noticing just how fit your best friend really was. 
you would catch yourself blushing when he said something, blood rushing into your cheeks at his little comments. mundane classes were now filled with excitement simply because he was there. 
you didn’t know if he had notices the change/ you hoped he hadn’t noticed the change. the last thing you wanted to do was ruin your friendship with taehyun because you couldn’t control the way your heart felt.
you tried desperately to push all the feelings down, trying your hardest to not let taehyun’s heart-stopping antics effect you. 
it seemed as though it was all in vain. no matter how hard you pushed, buried, drowned your feelings out- they just because stronger. 
you had tried to distance yourself, telling taehyun you were “too busy” or had “too much homework”. little excuses that were believable!
taehyun was too nice though. moving his schedule around so he could make time to hang out with you, even skipping practice one day so he could stay in your house and watch a movie sprawled out on the couch with you.
you had no escape from him, and although you were desperately trying to find an escape from being near him so often, being suffocated by his presence everywhere you went because everything reminded you of him- you knew you couldn’t be without him. 
you desiderated to be with him. you wanted nothing more than to call him yours.
-
“you’re gonna be rooting for me tonight, yeah?”, taehyun’s voice sounded behind you, making you jump slightly from his sudden appearance.
“of course i am, what kind of best friend would i be if i didn’t?”, you spun around to look at him, trying to keep a calm composure as you took in his outfit.
his black hair framed his face perfectly, a white polo adorning his top, with a navy blue crewneck overtop, khaki shorts on, showing off his long legs. 
he knew how to style himself, and you knew he knew he looked good. he smiled softly at you, before stepping forward and pulling you into a hug.
he breathed out a sigh, his chin resting on the top of your head, “what would i do without you?”
you felt suffocated. everything about him was suffocating. his cologne was filling your senses, his strong arms holding you against him.
“you’d die without me, obviously.”
you felt his laugh rumble in his chest, his telltale giggle leaving his lips. he moved his head back to look down at you, everything felt entirely too intimate for you. 
“y/n…”, his voice trailed off a bit, eyebrows furrowing a bit as he looked like he was trying to collect the words he wanted to use in his mind.
“yes?”
“do you maybe want-“
“taehyun!”
a voice coming from the entrance made both your beads turn, taking the chance to untangle yourself from taehyun’s arms, smiling awkwardly at beomgyu, who had walked in. 
“i’m gonna go, i’ll see you guys later?”, you excused yourself quietly, waving at the two boys before heading out of the room, not missing the way beomgyu sent you a sly smile, feeling as though a brick was lifted off your chest the second you made it out.
you could only yearn for taehyun from the sidelines of your heart, never fully being able to tell him just how you felt, never even being able to hint at it, holding all your love and admiration for him in a special place in your heart, keeping it protected so you could never be let down.
over time, you feared your facade was breaking down, your love for taehyun shining through for your best friend's eyes, but never for his. it was as though it was invisible to him, something everyone could see but him.
maybe you were doing something wrong. no- maybe there was just something wrong with you. who falls in love with their best friend? who lets themself dangerously tiptoe between the lines of friendship and lover, lines that were blurred to no one else but you.
you threw your head back with a groan, fighting the frustrated tears that threatened to spill from your eyes, overflowing with yet another wave of regret as you grumbled to yourself while walking away, probably looking like a psycho to anyone else.
-
you watched taehyun run with his teammates, captivating your view as he was the only thing visible in your line of sight. 
you heard the cheers, you heard the claps, you heard the whistles, you heard everything. you saw everything. but at the same time- you didn’t.
whenever taehyun was on the court, immersing himself in the game, losing himself in the thrill of it all, the cheers that pushed him, motivated him, he was captivating to you. 
the way he smiled brightly when they scored, pearly eyes glistening as he celebrated with him teammates, yelling an exclamation that had a large smile pulling itself on your lips as you clapped and cheered with the crowd, exclaiming for the man you loved.
the game continued on slowly, when the opposing team would score, your team would score, it was a race to the end, and neither team was backing down.
you knew why this game was so important. it was the pre-qualifiers for tournaments, and getting to those meant big things- obviously.
you were stressed, to put it simply. you found it funny sometimes, how you had never been a fan of basketball, never payed it any mind, never growing an interest in it- or any sports- in the slightest. 
that was until taehyun started playing. 
he would meet you after practice, telling you everything that went down, how he dunked perfectly, how he scored perfectly from the center of the court!
you nodded along every time, pretending to understand the words and rules that were coming out of his mouth.
it sounded like simlish to you. 
taehyun must’ve caught on to this at some point, because soon he was begging you to just watch one NBA game with him.
“pleeease, y/n. just one, i just want you to be able to understand.”, he whined, pulling on your arm as you stared up at him exasperatedly.
“why are you so adamant about this? it’s not like i’m the one playing!”
“well, yeah,”, he looked a bit dejected, “but i want my favorite person to know what i’m doing when she comes to my games.”
your breath caught in your throat as your eyes widened slightly, not having enough time to control your reactions as his words hit you.
“well- i- i mean, sure. yeah. i could watch like… one game.”, your words stumbled out of your mouth, your brain had completely shut down, words spilling out like an avalanche as you attempted- and failed- to regain your composure and not look like you were seconds away from ripping your hair out of your head.
he sent you a sly smile, seemingly aware of the effect he had on you. little shit. why were you even friends with him?
he pinched your check, muttering something about you being cute before sauntering off to your couch, “thank you! i’ll put on one of my favorite games!”
rolling your eyes, you realized you had once again fallen victim to your overwhelming feelings for taehyun, giving into anything he wanted because how could you ever say no to him?
and so you sat with him, listening as he explained what the referees were calling out, pausing the television every few minutes to go in depth on a subject, hands flying around and such a serious expression on his face, you almost got distracted by him before you had to catch yourself.
but the more he ranted, the more you realized that seeing him ramble on and on about something he was so passionate about was something you wanted to see more of. so, you let him play another game, and another… and another.
over time, you slowly realized that you were becoming interested in basketball. whether it was genuine interest, or you gaslighting yourself to be interested because of taehyun’s love, you weren’t sure. 
but you learned all the rules.
every time taehyun had free time, he would come over and watch a new game with you, chips and drinks surrounding you two as you immersed yourselves in the television, face scrunching up when something unfortunate happened.
it got to a point where you caught yourself complaining out loud when they called a foul, eyes rolling and asking taehyun, are they serious, before angrily stuffing chips into your mouth.
and soon you were jumping up with him when the team you were rooting for won, exclaiming with him as you did your little happy dance in the living room, never once stopping to question how stupidly uncoordinated you looked. 
then you were at his practices, you were bringing him lunch, you were watching him play. you became close with his teammates, learning all their names, and even know as he played in college and roomed with 4 of his teammates who you had grown close with, you were still going to his practices when you had time. it was a routine.
basketball had grown to be something you loved, and enjoyed. and you had taehyun to thank for all of it.
a yell tore you out of your daydreaming, zoning back in on the game as you realized the game was about to end, and taehyun’s team needed to score this point to win the game.
you let your elbows rest on your knees as you leaned forward, concentration etched on your face as you watched the ball travel back and forth between players, the loud squeaks of shoes rubbing against the gym floor slightly causing your eyes to twitch, but you stayed focused.
players on the opposing team were starting to become restless, and you picked up on that, noticing taehyun did as well, his eyes zoning in on the ball as he grounded himself to watch where the ball was going next before he leapt into action.
he weaved through the players easily, dodging hands and bodies that tried to block him, easily swiping the ball from underneath another player, holding onto the ball as he spun away from the man before letting the ball drop to the ground again as he dribbled it easily, making his way to the middle of the court.
you watched as he closed his eyes for a quick second, eyebrows furrowing as he pushed breath out his lips. you noticed it was a habit he had picked up, when he was getting ready to shoot, and he was concentrated, he made that face. you found it endearing.
with 5 seconds left on the clock, his eyes opened back up, a dark gaze in them as he zoned in on the basket. his arms lifted up, his fingers gliding off the ball easily as he shot it into the air, watching as it rolled through the air, landing in the basket and scoring a point easily.
the room erupted with cheers as you realized taehyun had won the game. he had made the winning shot. he was going to the tournaments.
you couldn’t hold back the yell that escaped your throat as you screamed for him, watching as his head turned towards your voice, before he was running straight to you with a wide, confident smile on his face.
“did you see what i did?”, he practically yelled over the cheers, arms pulling you into his embrace before quickly pulling back, hands coming up to hold onto the sides of your face.
you breath caught in your throat, a warmth spreading across your whole body, “yes! you were amazing!”
he stared at you for a second, not saying anything. there was once again the expression you couldn’t read on his face, his brows furrowing the tiniest bit.
you didn’t have time to think about it too much though, because as you opened your mouth to say something, you felt a pair of soft lips press against yours.
a small gasp left your lips, your whole body melting into taehyun’s touch and kissing him back before you even processed what you were doing.
his lips moved against yours perfectly, soft lips enveloping your own as his hands caressed your face, his touch featherlight, but somehow still holding you in place.
he pulled away slowly, pressing his forehead against your own as heavy breaths escaped the both of you.
you didn’t know what had just happened. your brain was going blank, thoughts seemingly disappearing into this air as you tried to recollect yourself, tried to make any sense over what had just happened.
your eyes fluttered open, staring into taehyun’s eyes, not knowing exactly what to say. a dark red blush covered his cheeks, and he carefully removed his hands from your face and pulled his face away from yours, reality slowly hitting the both of you.
“i.. i don’t know why i did that.”
oh.
did he regret it?
you didn’t know what to say. your felt as though your mouth had gone dry, eyes blinking haphazardly and mouth stuttering open and closed.
“oh..”, was all that you were able to get out.
taehyun opened his mouth to speak again, but before he could get any words out, soobin was clapping him on the back, thanking him for winning and doing so well for the team.
“hey, y/n!”, he greeted you quickly, before his eyes were quickly fleeting back to taehyun.
you didn’t have it in you to reply at the moment.
you watched as taehyun was dragged away, eyes holding contact with yours for as long as he could until bodies were blocking his view from you, turning him around, speaking to him, thanking him, things he should’ve wanted to hear.
but he didn’t.
he didn’t want to hear those things right now.
he wanted to speak to you, he wanted to be able to tell you it wasn’t a mistake, he knew why he kissed you. he kissed you because he was in love with you. truly, madly, deeply in love with you in such an irrevocable way he couldn’t change it even if he tried.
but as he desperately looked at the spot where you were standing seconds ago, he saw no one, the ghost of the incident that had happened between you two seconds ago replaying in your mind.
you tried to hold back your tears as you stumbled through the doors of the gym, not knowing what to do or think or feel or..
you were overstimulated, wanting everything to slow down and speed up at the same time.
finally, the flood of tears you were holding back broke, tears streaming down your face freely as you tried to make your way to your car as quickly as you could, not wanting anyone to see or hear the way ugly sobs were leaving your mouth.
you didn’t know why taehyun had kissed you.
you thought for a second he felt the same way as you, maybe he was as deeply in love with you as you were with him!
but the way he looked after, the expression on his face, the words that left his mouth..
you felt stupid.
you felt stupid. there was no other words to describe how you felt. foolish. you were foolish for thinking that way for even a second.
and as you climbed into your car, a whole new wave of emotions hit you as more sobs wrecked your body, letting your head hit the steering wheel as regret coursed through your veins.
what had you done?
-
you were a wreck.
you hadn’t called taehyun in two days, hadn’t texted him, you hadn’t even been going to school for the sole fear of running into him.
your friends had noticed your absence, knowing that something like this was not part of the norm for you, so you had been getting bombarded with messages asking if you were okay, if you were feeling sick, if you needed someone to talk to.
you replied with a simple “i’m fine<3” every time. because how lame would you seem if you told them you had fallen into some type of depression because you had kissed your best friend?
there was something so delicate about your and taehyun’s friendship now, and you were scared that if you messed with it in the slightest, it would rip. and you couldn’t risk losing your best friend.
but what if by not talking to him you were losing him?
what if you talked to him and lost him that way?
too many negative thoughts were swirling in your mind like a hurricane ravishing a town, leaving nothing but destruction in its wake.
perhaps it was time to just… watch netflix while cuddled in your favorite blanket, blocking out the rest of the world and all your worries.
yeah, that sounded really nice right about now.
-
taehyun had been anxiously checking his phone nonstop for the past two days.
debating whether he should text you first, or wait for you to reach out first.
he was in such a dilemma, he didn’t know what to do to solve this.
actually, the answer was simple. but was he ever actually going to confess to you?
that’s funny.
the boys didn’t want to say anything the first day, brushing it off as them looking too deeply into things.
but this was not how taehyun acted normally. no, he carried himself so confidently. he knew what he wanted. he didn’t back down. this taehyun they had seem moping around the dorm, school, and even practice- a place where all his worries usually disappeared- was not the taehyun they knew.
“hey, taehyun," yeonjun called, taking the spot next to him on the couch, “have you been feeling alright lately?”
taehyun’s head jerked up, a bit of confusion painting his face as he stared at his older friend, “yeah, i’ve been fine. why?”
“you just haven’t been acting like your normal self lately. wanted to make sure everything was alright.”, yeonjun explained, sending a small smile taehyun’s way before getting ready to move on with his day after being reassured taehyun was indeed okay.
while standing up from the couch, he felt a slight tug on his shirt and turned around to see taehyun lightly grabbing onto his shirt, a conflicted look in his eyes. 
“taehyun,” he sat down once again, giving his full attention to him, “what’s going on?”
he stayed quiet for a bit, obviously not knowing how to approach this conversation in any way.
“are you done watching tv? i wanna play my game.”, beomgyu’s voice echoed down the hall, bouncing into the living room without a care in the world.
“beomgyu, just wait a second, alright?”, yeonjun asked him, and beomgyu immediately noticed how yeonjun was in his “big serious brother mode”- a name the boys had made for when he got like this- and slowly walked over to the couch, taking a seat near taehyun.
“continue, taehyun.”
taehyun shook his head lightly, “i don’t even know where to start.”
“well, just try and explain it. i’ll wait.”, yeonjun reassured him, and taehyun was grateful to have such caring friends for a second.
“imightvekissedy/natthebasketballgametwodaysagoandnowidontknowwhattodo.”
yeonjun’s head visibly shot back from the speed of which the words were thrown at him, not even being able to pick out a few.
beomgyu’s voice filled the silence, “what the fuck did you just say?”
“slow down your words, tae.”
“okay,” he took a deep breath before clearing his throat, “i kissed y/n at the basketball game two days ago when we won because i was excited and now i don’t know what to do, i’m afraid i ruined our friendship. i told her i didn’t know why i kissed her and didn’t say anything else”
silence.
no one said anything for a solid five seconds, if you listened closely enough you would probably be able to hear the neighbors next door.
taehyun said nothing as he stared at yeonjun awaiting his reaction, for him to say something, anything, but all he was getting was a dumbfounded look in return.
then beomgyu’s laugh filled the room, loud and boisterous as he smacked taehyun on his back, hard enough to make taehyun spin around with an exasperated look.
“dude, are you fucking stupid?”, beomgyu exclaimed after calming himself down, smiling at taehyun.
“this isn’t funny, beomgyu. i seriously don’t want to lose her!”, taehyun sighed, letting his head rest in his hands as he took a deep breath to calm himself down.
yeonjun moved himself a bit closer to taehyun, patting his back as he tried to form his next sentence.
“look, taehyun, i’m pretty sure beomgyu’s not laughing to make fun of you, it’s just-“, he started, before being rudely cut off.
“she’s been in love with you for years!”
taehyun’s head shot up at the sound of that, staring at beomgyu with an incredulous look.
“what?”
“i’m surprised you haven’t realized. we all know, i guess you’re the only one that didn’t.”, beomgyu continued, speaking as if this was supposed to be common knowledge to taehyun.
it sounded like some alien language to him.
you? in love with him? there’s no way he didn’t notice.
“beomgyu, you better not be fucking lying to me right now.”, taehyun spoke, brain running into overdrive.
“he’s not.”, yeonjun spoke this time, sending taehyun a reassuring smile.
“i’ve spoken to her about it before. i told her to just tell you because it wouldn’t go as badly as she was thinking. she’s honestly head over heels for you.”, he continued.
“but-“, taehyun tried to speak, before being cut off by yeonjun once again.
“and, to be quite honest, you ghosting her after randomly kissing her out of nowhere, then proceeding to tell her you didn’t know why you did… that has to be making her feel like shit, knowing how much she likes you.”, yeonjun finished. he made sure to give taehyun a disappointed dad look.
taehyun was standing up in a second, the boys not even being able to process how fast he was moving until he was pulling on his shoes by the door.
“taehyun, where’re you going?”, yeonjun asked, and instead of getting a reply, he got the door shutting in his face.
“it’s raining, taehyun get a jacket!”, beomgyu also
called out to him, but his warnings fell on dead ears as taehyun was long gone.
there was nothing but adrenaline coursing through his veins as he pushed through the heavy rain, ignoring the way the fat droplets stung his skin, feeling himself become more and more drenched with each king stride he took, already knowing he would be getting a cold from this, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care.
all he knew was that he needed to make things up to you.
if only he had picked up on the signs that were apparently obvious to everyone else, maybe you would’ve been his by now, but he was so oblivious to everything that he missed every little sign and hint you threw his way.
he pushed past people walking on the street, not even bothering to apologize as he cut people off, mind fixed on one thing and one thing only.
feet slipping on wet concrete as he caught himself from falling too many times to count at this point.
he finally made it to your apartment building, standing outside for a few seconds to catch his breath and make sure he actually knew what he was about to do.
he thought he should’ve been second guessing at least one part of this by now, but he wasn’t. not one single thing.
he stared up at the floor you lived on, mentally readying himself for whatever outcome he walked out of the building with. he just needed you to know, needed you to understand how far the extent of his feelings for you were. 
he was indisputably in love with you.
-
you had to say, sitting on the couch for seven hours straight was slowly making you feel worse rather better. 
you had nothing else to do though, and you refused to leave the house for reasons that were obvious to you only.
so, watching reruns of gilmore girls had become your new reality for the last couple days, curled under your favorite blanket with a snack in arms reach at all times.
it was entertaining at first, it distracted you, and it felt like the start of summer break, when you did absolutely nothing for a couple days and just savored not being in school. 
at this point though, you just felt like you were rotting into the couch. your mind drifted off to your movie marathons with taehyun every once in a while, and you would have to turn off the tv and get on your phone for a bit.
it was like he followed you around everywhere. even if he wasn’t there in person, you tried to do everything you could to distract yourself, to think of anything besides him.
but your mind would always come back to him. you would find some way to relate what you were doing with him, and that would ruin your day all over again.
presently, you were watching pretty little liars, starting to venture into shows you had watched years and years ago.
you were just getting to a good scene when a knock sounded on your door.
you weren’t expecting company, confused as you stood up from the couch to slowly make your way over to the door.
god, no one needed to see you in this state, you were praying it was just a delivery guy or something.
you hadn’t ordered anything though, so that seemed implausible.
looking through your peephole, you felt as though all the air was ripped from your lungs.
taehyun was standing on the other side.
you almost didn’t open it, wanting to turn the other way and run straight for your bedroom, but you knew you were going to have to speak to him about what happened sooner or later.
he was also soaking wet, and you felt bad for him.
slowly, you opened the door, feeling meek as your eyes met his, trying to not break down on the spot.
“taehyun.. what are you doing here,” you looked him up and down, “and why are you soaking wet?”
you grabbed a hold of his forearm so you could pull him inside, immediately setting him down on the couch as you began to trudge off to your room to grab him clothes he had left the last time he was here.
you were trying so hard to hold yourself together right now.
reaching into your closet to grab his clothes, you heard footsteps approach from behind you.
“y/n.”
you didn’t turn to face him, instead keeping your eyes trained ahead, refusing to let yourself break.
“you can just listen, that’s fine.”
you heard a quiet sigh, before he began speaking again.
“i.. i know i messed up a few days ago. honestly, i don’t know what was going through my head. i mean, i do know. i wanted to kiss you. i really like you, i mean, i honestly think i’m in love with you but- i just, that wasn’t the right time to act on my feelings for you. and i was in shock about what i did so i just.. i said i didn't know why i did it. i do know. i did it because i’m in love with you, and i don’t know if you feel the same way, beomgyu told me you did which is why i ran all the way over here but-“
“taehyun.”
you had turned around while he was mid rant, and he didn’t even realize, looking at the ground while he talked, fingers fidgeting with the hem of his shirt, and his own hands. he was obviously incredibly nervous.
“hm?”, his voice was meek, eyes meeting yours once again.
“i’m in love with you, too. i have been for years.”, you replied quietly, a small smile on your lips, watching the way his eyes lit up at your sentence.
he took two quick steps towards you before his lips were on yours once again.
hands pressed on either side of your face, holding you like you would disappear if he let go.
there was so much emotion, so many more feelings than you thought could be exchanged through a simple kiss.
his lips molded with yours perfectly, moving against you in a way that made you feel complete. you were once again completely surrounded by him, but you enjoyed it this time.
you felt like you were on cloud nine, your hands sliding all over his arms, trying to find some way to ground yourself.
very carefully, you felt his tongue prod at your lips, and your mouth was opening before you knew what you were doing.
mouths working together in such a love-filled way, you let all your inhibitions go, completely falling into this new feeling, and letting yourself be fully surrounded by it.
was this what people meant when they talked about a true love’s kiss?
the only reason you pulled away was due to your lungs starting to burn from the lack of oxygen, keeping your eyes closed as you caught your breath.
“so pretty..”, you heard taehyun whisper, and you couldn’t fight the shy smile that formed on your lips.
your eyes fluttered open softly, letting out a quiet giggle once you met his eyes, head leaning into the crook of his neck as your hands circled his waist, holding him so close to you.
a laugh erupted from his lips at your action, “god, you’re so cute.”
this is what true love felt like. you knew it then and there. this is what all the characters in romance movies talk about, this is the feeling they try to convey. you understood it now. and it felt amazing.
you pulled away to look at him, “so, we’re like.. dating now right?”
another small chuckle left his lips.
“well, y/n, do you want to be my girlfriend?”, he asked dramatically, taking on the voice of a prince after saving the princess.
it was your turn to burst into laughter, slapping his chest lightly and rolling your eyes.
“you’re supposed to take a moment like this seriously! but yes, i do want to be your girlfriend.”
“good, because there was no way i was letting you go.”, he confessed quietly, a hand coming to hold your face as his thumb stroked your cheek.
you leaned up to capture his lips with yours once again, a small peck before you pulled back. taehyun’s lips tried to follow yours, but you only giggled softly, pulling back more and more.
“i’m not done kissing you.”
you were in for a long night.
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lollll i hope u enjoyed :)))))
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heartofwritiing · 3 months
Note
could you write wilbur soot confessing his love to a crush? 👉👈
something about how he's been pinning after this crush for so long, but the crush seems a bit avoidant or something
but that's because the crush also has a crush on him and is very very shy qpwimsmanssjslslek sorry im not good with requests
You and me need never be, lonely again.
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Paring: cc!wilbur soot x fem!cc!reader
authors note: Thank you so much for requesting! I hope you don't mind the reader being a content creator and i’m sorry she’s not super shy because im not really sure how to write shy lol but i hope you like the request! I just thought it would add to the idea and I've wanted to do something similar to this for a while! This is a request back from august. I am so sorry this took me so long to get out. I've been going through some shit irl but I'm finally starting to come back to writing because I genuinely love it and posting on here since it is my safe space!
line from this prompt list
warnings: friends-lovers, reader lives in the US, brief description of anxiety, the reader sends mixed signals, swearing, kinda angsty, happy end, super unedited!
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"No! That was such bullshit!"
The voice of Tommyinnit ran through the speakers of your computer causing you to let out a chuckle that you were the reason for his outburst.
You were playing Gang Beasts on stream with some of your closest friends, and you had grabbed Tommy's character and thrown him off the map by picking him up.
Laughter rang out amongst the group as the screen card popped up saying your username won. You cheered as everyone groaned but dispersed into 'ggs' then that's when everyone started to bid goodnight. You hadn't realized it had been four hours of streaming and playing games, showing the good time you were having with friends.
"Alright chat, that's gonna be it for me today! Please remember to click the follow button if you're new to stream that way you'll know when I go live! byeee!" You did your outro, quickly closed your stream down, and logged out of Twitch.
It was an uneventful stream session, thank god. You’ve noticed more and more how your chat gets when you even mention wilburs name.
“you logging off completely y/n/n?” Ranboos voices asks through your earbuds.
“No, I’ll play a few more rounds if you guys are down,” you respond.
“HELL YEAH!” Tommy boasted. “IM GONNA KICK YOUR ASS THIS TIME Y/N/N!”
“Oh, it’s on gremlin child!” you replied.
Wilbur listened to this conversation on his end, letting out a chuckle. He honestly doesn’t know why you make him laugh so easily. Anytime you threw a genius comment toward Tommy that was deemed insulting, or calling him a name Wilbur fell for you more and more. If only he had the guts to tell you.
You as well wouldn’t admit it but every time Wilbur laughed all you could feel was butterflies punching your stomach and a smile that made your cheeks hurt. You were also falling hard for him.
After about another fifteen minutes, Tommy and Ranboo had bid their goodbyes for the night and ended their calls. You were left in call with Wilbur, the silence could be cut with a knife.
Knowing him for two years was hard. Wilbur was everything to you. He was funny, smart, charming, and overall made you feel comfortable. Something you thought you’d never have with anyone. Having to only talk on call and video made things easier for you. On call you could hide your blushes and smiles from him, but not from your chat who caught every interaction between you and Wilbur when you streamed. The constant ’Wilbur x name confirmed?’ tweets and comments in your twitch chat were recently repetitive and you wondered when you became such a beacon of attention. It gave you such anxiety to have all eyes on you when you wanted to spend time with your best friend.
It was getting obnoxious to the point where you debated making a tweet to get the fans to stop shipping you both, even if you were dating it was no one’s business. Still you never dared to say anything out of fear of stans coming at you in anyway. You didn’t need to draw more unwanted attention to yourself.
“You logging off? it’s getting pretty late for you,” you spoke up.
“Yeah, we both should, by the way what times your flight tomorrow?”
Right, you were flying less than eight hours from now to finally meet your friends inperson. You all had planned this for months, booking hotels and flights, making a whole deal about it. Then you really wouldn’t be able to hide from him for a whole week.
“Around seven-thirty,” you reply.
He hums.
“I’ll let you get some rest, see you tomorrow night darling,” his voice purposely going lower on the ‘darling’ part that you almost didn’t catch it, making your knees go weak.
“N-night Will,” you stutter, end call and slump back into your desk chair trying to calm your racing heart. Meanwhile Wilbur all the way across the ocean in Brighton has a smile plastered across his lips.
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About a plane ride, a train ride and car ride later, you are stood in the hotel lobby in Brighton waiting for a late Tommy and Wilbur to arrive. You were super nervous to meet them. Having only been friends for what was a short time, it felt like you knew them for years, so why was this so scary?
You debated in your mind about texting them to see if they were close by, but you didn’t want to come off as annoying and impatient. You wanted to make a good first impression, but again these were your friends. Why were you shaking with nerves?
You fiddled with your thumb’s absentmindedly until you felt a pair of hands on your shoulders, causing you to jump out of your skin. You spin around to be met with a cackling Tommy who is clucking his stomach from laughing so hard at your reaction.
“Fucking gremlin child,” you huffed under your breath, not realizing the evident blood rushing to your cheeks from being startled so easily.
“It’s nice to hear you say that in person,” a deep voice said from behind Tommy. You shifted your eyes to see a very tall Wilbur, who was wearing his round glasses pushed up his nose and curly hair fluffed to the side.
His dark sweater selves rolled up to revel his arms tucked into his side as he gazed at you with a soft smile. Finally after two years of being separated by seas, your best friend was standing right in front of you. It was surreal to say the least.
You laugh and jump forward to embrace him. The number of times you’d tease him over-call about his height made you regret your words. He towers over you as he bends down to your level to give you a long awaited hug. His arms are soft, yet firm as they wrap around your back and cage you into his embrace.
You both pull away, both grinning from ear to ear. He looks down at you with a hint of something behind his eyes, he seems to be genuinely happy to finally meet you in person. which makes you blush at the thought of him looking forward to this moment since you told him you wanted to come here. You're quickly brought out of your moment when Tommy speaks up behind you.
"So he gets a hug and I don't?!" his tone slightly offended.
"Yup, cause you're annoying," you bring a hand up to flick his forehead, causing him to let out a irritated noise. you had only just met him in person but something compelled you to do that. Maybe it was just a reason for you to break the ice and it was working because you all broke out into giggles.
“Im just kidding Tom,” you motion him into a hug.
Wilbur just stood observing the entire interaction between his two best friends. He was thrilled to finally have you here, he couldn't wait to show you all his favorite places, hang out, and get to know better in person. Finally.
The two boys had managed to drag you to the beach, and even though it was freezing Tommy insisted on going to the arcade to try and win another 'vlog gun'. After suffering through loosing a few games, Wilbur managed to win you a little stuffed cat that you promptly named Mr Whiskers.
It was endearing to watch him struggle at most of the games so he could get enough tickets. It was all worth it in his eyes to embarrass himself by losing ski-ball to you, twice, he saw the evident blush on your cheeks and the look you gave him. As if he hung the stars in the sky just for you. It made his chest hurt in a good way.
The rest of the night went smoothly for the most part. More and more, Wilbur had been getting more touchy with you. Though you didn’t mind it at all, maybe he didn’t realize how much he was putting his hand on you as you walked side by side as he led you through crowds. How he held doors open for you. It was sweet.
Maybe he was doing it just to be nice. That small voice in the back of your head telling you thats all it was. Because thats what friends do.
Eventually, the three of you met up with Ranboo and Charlie. They were just how they were online, which made meeting them a whole lot better. Walking around Brighton, making inside jokes and teasing each other. You hadn't been this happy in a while. You can remember the last time you genuinely enjoyed yourself, your friends were the product of that. You were fortunate to have found them when you did. Quarantine was hard on you, much like the rest of the world. So when you were invited to join a group game call, you couldn't pass up the opportunity. That night, something had clicked between you and Wilburt specifically. Then you started to join more calls with the gang and the rest was history.
Sometime in the night, you found yourself walking behind with Wilbur by your side chatting about nothing in particular. Until the comfortable silence filled the air between you, you took a moment to take in the nightlife of Brighton. The street lamps guide your way through the beachside and the pubs on the corner were starting to fill up. As if the city was somehow more alive at night.
"I'm really glad you came," Wilbur speaks, sincerely.
You stop your wide-eyed gaze to look at him and smile softly at him.
"I am too," You gush. "I'm honestly considering moving here,” Now he’s smiling.
Wilbur's brain starts to go a million miles a second. His heart leaped at the thought of you living closer to him. Seeing you in person everyday seemed like a dream come true. He begins to slow his step and a frown replaces your smile. Your own thoughts running rampant now, assuming you might've freaked him out by voicing that you wanted to move here so soon after meeting him in person. Maybe it made him uncomfortable. it was too soon to say something that bold. You had only just met him in person today.
"Listen, Y/N..."
You stopped and your brain got the best of you with his tone. You shouldn't have said anything like that to him. It was too soon.
“I don’t want to sound cheesy, but I need you to know how I feel.”
Oh... OH.
You knew what this was leading to. Realizing why he was acting the way he was all day.
"I like you, more than like you. You're funny, beautiful, smart, and everything I could've hoped for in a best friend. But I can't keep pretending I don't think of you when we aren't talking, or how when I look at you my chest hurts."
Wilbur liked you. Really liked you. You would jump for joy and shout to the rooftops about how much you reciprocate his feelings but something in the back of your mind told you not to. The doubt in your mind from yourself, both your fans online judging. It made you slowly start to panic. You felt as though you weren’t good enough for him.
You saw the aftermath of when his fans shipped him and Niki together. It almost ruined their friendship. You didn’t want that.
"Please say something?" he stops his rant to notice you are staring up at him with blank eyes.
"I-uh," you stutter. "can we maybe not do this now?"
His face falls and it instantly crushes you with regret. His disappointment shows as he gives you a forced smile and nods.
"Y-yeah, let's catch up with everyone, Tommy wants to do this big stream at his place." he gestures for you to move along with him, all while you feel horrible for doing this.
You wish you could take back what you said. You know you've hurt him, It's painfully obvious when he doesn't talk to you for the rest of the walk. You glance at him a few times but he keeps his eyes forward and stoic.
If only you didn’t let your anxiety get the best of you. You had to talk to him at some point, but for now you pushed it aside. The rest of the group didn’t seem to notice the sudden tension between the two of you, if they did nothing was remarked about it.
As you continued the journey to Tommys flat, you and Wilbur still walked silently side by side. With what little courage you had, you reached out your hand and held his in a moment of truce. Giving it a gentle squeeze with your fingers to seal the deal that you would talk later. You heard his soft inhale at the contact and he squeezes back. Your shoulders drop from the weight of tension being lifted off. Maybe, just maybe this ment this conversation wasn’t over.
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Back at Tommy’s, the monitor in his cramped bedroom with everyone packed together like sardines; shows the twitch chat flashing by with viewers comments.
“WELCOME BACK TO THE STREAM EVERYONE!” Tommy shouted causing you to hold your ear in slight pain.
“God Tommy, could you be anymore loud?” you wince.
“Look who’s here chat!” he gestured to you with his hands, ignoring your complaints. You waved at the webcam as chat went crazy. He introduced everyone else as they all broke out into a chorus of conversation.
Wilbur was mostly quiet on your left, an occasional sarcastic comment made here and there. You could practically feel his eyes buring into the side of your head. Hopping chat wasn’t noticing how he was looking at you, your eyes shifting to your lap to fidget with your fingers.
Out of view, Wilbur reached over and took your hand picking at the skin around your nails. You had stopped your nervous tick and opted for squeezing his hand. Nobody seemed to notice the sudden shift in both your behavior.
Suddenly you felt tense, the feeling of having everyone’s eyes on you made your mind start to spiral.
Letting go of Wilburs hand, you quickly had excused yourself and walked out of Tommys room and into the kitchen.
Everyone had a mix of concerned and worried expressions as they watched you leave the room but didn’t say anything about it. Wilbur had followed you in pursuit. He found you in the kitchen hyperventilating Your panic had taken over and now your lungs were paying the price for the burning sensation from not breathing.
“it's okay,” he took your face into his hands and held you. “just follow my breaths.
he took a breath in, and you followed.
When you came to your senses, Wilbur had asked you what was wrong and you just began to cry. Everything came rushing down on you.
“Im sorry. I-Im sorry I shot you down earlier, Im sorry for h-hurting you. I-i,” you stuttered over yourself. Wilbur shakes his head at you. He probably thinks you’re such a mess.
“I don’t understand, I know you like me too, so I don’t understand why you rejected me after I poured my heart out to you. Then you go and hold my hand while we're walking.'
Wilbur was right. Playing with his feelings was selfish and cruel. He was completely in the right to question you. You were practically flirting with one another all day, and then you shut down his advances of trying to open your relationship.
“I do wanna be with you.” you sniff. “I'm just really scared.”
"Why darling? It's just me, your silly old Wil." he pokes at your sides causing you to let out a giggle. Your best friend, who looked at you with the prettiest chocolate eyes, who stayed on call with you all night when you couldn't sleep. The only person you told your deepest fears and dreams to.
You take a shaky inhale as you begin to explain. "I don't wanna ruin our friendship, we have something I've never experienced with anyone else in my life. I care about you too much to let me be a distraction in your life, and I am scared that the fans will-"
Wilbur interrupts you with a hand on your arm.
"The fans? darling who cares about that, I care way too much about you to even care about what strangers think. It's no one's business who I, or you for that matter have a relationship with." he clarified. "I love you and nothing or no one will ever change that."
Those three words made your heart leap in your throat.
"Y-you l-love me?" you stutter in disbelief.
"Yes, of course I do."
Tears roll down the apples of your cheeks as you lean forward to engulf Wilbur into another hug. His arms wrapped around your back reciprocating your embrace. your face buried in his neck as you inhale his cologne and your tears dampen his skin.
"I love you too Wil," you whisper.
He squeezes you closer to him in return and this time you don't hold yourself back...
-
taglist: @trashcanduck @ax-y10 @mysticalsoot @idontreallyexistyet @loonalvjy @toastyliltoasts41
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