#and Snape didn’t have that option and his bullying continued for his entire time at Hogwarts

[byronicbat]

It astounds me that Snaters refuse to have any sympathy for young Snape because he refused to lie down and be attacked by 4 bullies. They would rather he have been a perfect victim than to take steps to actually defend himself. Even though he attended a school where the adults in authority didn’t give a shit if you were bullied. What was he supposed to do?

#I’ve seen this take so many times #as if he was the inherently violent one #because he used his knowledge of the dark arts as a weapon #the marauders literally used the marauders map and the invisibility cloak as tools to harass him relentlessly #he was well within his rights to fight back and defend himself in any way possible #I swear some people do not know what it’s like to be violently bullied #I remember being pushed in the mud daily #I remember being shoved into a piano and losing consciousness and waking up in the nurses office #teachers did nothing #it wasn’t until my mom found out and confronted my bully herself that it stopped #and Snape didn’t have that option and his bullying continued for his entire time at Hogwarts #so no I’m glad he fought back #I’m not mad about sectumsempra #maybe that’s controversial but 🤷🏽‍♀️ #severus snape #anti bullying #pro snape

[lov3nerdstuff]

Voluptas Noctis Aeternae {Part 7.36}

*Severus Snape x OC*

Summary: It is the year 1983 when the ordinary life of Robin Mitchell takes a drastic turn: she is accepted into Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Despite the struggles of being a muggle-born in Slytherin, she soon discovers her passion for Potions, and even manages the impossible: gaining the favor of Severus Snape. Throughout the years, Robin finds that the not quite so ordinary Potions Professor goes from being a brooding stranger to being more than she had ever deemed possible. An ally, a mentor, a friend... and eventually, the person she loves the most. Through adventure, prophecies and the little struggles of daily life in a castle full of mysteries, Robin chooses a path for herself, an unlikely friendship blossoms into something more, and two people abandoned by the world can finally find a home.

General warnings: professor x student, blood, violence, trauma, neglectful families, bullying, cursing

Words: 3.4k

Read Part 1.1 here! All Parts can be found on the Masterlist!

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"And that is?" Robin raised her eyebrows at him in question and curiosity alike, immediately catching onto the spark of hope that came with the prospect of an advantage indeed.

"Me." He replied as simply as that, with an entirely, if not too straight face, and Robin couldn't help her snort in return

"How very humble of you…" She said smoothly, but with a smirk on her lips nonetheless. He was right though, they did stand two against one after all, and they always would. The thought, as always, served to calm Robin more than any piece of saving history or weapon could.

"I am entirely serious about it." Snape added however when Robin's humoured expression didn't cease even after a few seconds, and thus her smile vanished to make way for her utmost attention to his words again. "Since there have always been mutual affections between the Morgan and the Bennett heir up to this point, as well as going by the few accounts of various incarnations of the prophecy, it is safe to say that there has never before been such a disturbance. Both heirs have as of yet always opposed each other alone, because neither was free in their choice to seek out a different partner."

"And you think that whatever anomaly it was that made me not have any curse-inflicted positive or negative emotions for Morgan is the reason why the prophecy will end differently this time?"

"I believe you are the best chance to end the prophecy once and for all that the Bennett line has had in over five hundred years." He replied in open sincerity, and Robin's heart skipped a beat before it was captured by both hope and adoration. "And I can state the facts as they are: I was never meant to be part of this prophecy, nor am I part of it now. I am the anomaly in this scenario, and as we both know, anomalies tend to lead to a different outcome than the predicted one, even in any controlled environment."

"Did you just use potions logic to explain why we will win against Morgan?" Robin couldn't help the affectionate smile that took over her features once more; phrased like he had just now, it really did sound like she had a chance. She couldn't put into words how much she loved him for always cheering her up. For giving her hope, and every strength she could possibly need.

"It appears so." He mused in return, quirking an eyebrow up along with his words as he studied Robin in the flickering light of the flames. "Yet the fortunate preconditions will not change one of the core problems of the entire prophecy: in order for you to live, we will have to kill Morgan instead."

Robin's heart fell in an instant, as did her smile, and even her stomach picked up the all too familiar churning once again. For a few seconds she avoided Snape's eyes by staring into the flames, before at last her gaze returned to him in all the unfathomable sadness it brought along. "I can't kill him, Sev. I had every possibility and reason to today, and yet I… I can't."

"I know. And we will see to it that you won't have to." He replied quietly, then seemed to be lost in his own thoughts for a moment until he spoke on. "Though I admit I do not entirely understand how the prophecy treats the subject. From what I understand, Morgan will have to die at your hand and only yours, even though or especially because I am not part of the prophecy. Otherwise I would gladly have volunteered to end him myself in this very instant."

A huff, both bitterly humoured and indignant, escaped Robin's lips, and she found herself rolling her eyes at this stupid prophecy. Of course it had to be her… everything else just would've been too easy, wouldn't it? But then again… "I wouldn't have wanted you to do it either way." She said. "I will gladly spare your soul that torture at any cost."

"Morgan's death is inevitable if we want to keep you alive, you know that."

"Nothing is truly inevitable. It can't be." Robin shrugged with another sigh, then finally gathered her wits to speak up about another thought that had fostered in her mind ever since this afternoon. "You know, I looked at him while he was at my mercy today, and I realized something that only now makes sense to me. At last."

"Enlighten me."

"Do you remember what my boggart turned into, in my third year?"

"How could I forget… It was a deeply concerning and unsettling occurrence." Snape scoffed, but then sighed and motioned for her to continue.

"I think it was the prophecy that made the boggart change into that dark version of myself which we both saw. And it's also what turned my nightmares in my fourth year into such a horror show. Remember Morgan's words, at the ball: he sees in me the hollow darkness of inevitable death." Robin took a deep breath, then finally got to the point. "The boggart and my nightmares showed me precisely what will become of me if I kill Morgan like I am obviously meant to. It was my destiny in the prophecy that the boggart and the curse found in my being, not my deepest fear. Even though it might as well be one and the same thing at this point."

"That-..." Was his only reply for a few long seconds, until surprise was followed up by understanding in his expression. "I believe you might just be right about that."

"I don't want to become that thing we saw back then, Sev." Her voice took on an almost pleading tone, low and far too breathy for Robin's liking, but it was the price for keeping it from breaking entirely. "But I would, if I kill Morgan. Perhaps it's part of the curse… or perhaps it's just my own stupid weakness. But we both have seen what will become of me, and I don't want to be that person. I can't be. I can't kill him."

"Then we will find another way to end the prophecy. Without anyone dying."

"What other way could there possibly be? You said Morgan's death at my hands is inevitable, it's always gonna be either him or I. No third option. I kill him, or I die."

"Just as you said before, nothing is truly inevitable." He returned, as calmly serious as ever. "While I would not hesitate to end Morgan in a blink, I will also not hesitate to spare you from doing so yourself. We will find a different way, because we always do. Because we have to."

"Alright." And again, as always, Robin couldn't help believing him in the end. A half smile tugged on her lips as she looked up at him once again, in the knowledge that they would be alright somehow. "We will find a way, before it's too late."

"That we will." He sighed under his breath, then placed a gentle kiss on her forehead and yet held onto her a little more tightly in return. They weren't optimists, no… but they had as of yet gotten out of even more impossible situations than this, every single time.

Robin's smile brightened ineffably as she allowed herself to be tugged closer against his chest, his head coming to rest on top of her own, and for a moment they simply enjoyed the silence of the night. It was terribly late, and there was no doubt that they both were beyond exhausted. Perhaps detention and almost dying weren't quite comparable in what they did to one's body and mind, but it was safe to say that this day ought to come to an end for both of them nevertheless. It had been too much… Hogsmeade, the room of hidden things, Morgan's office, dinner, their office, Morgan's rooms, the astronomy tower, and finally the entire struggle with the prophecy right here and now. Good gods, Robin's head felt like bursting with all the things she had just learned. They had uncovered so many horrible truths today… but they finally had gotten a step further in understanding the big picture. A step further to bringing it all to an end.

"Is there any more we can do now?" She asked after a while. "I feel like we forgot something crucial, but I can't grasp what that might be."

"We should rest, for now. Everything else can wait until tomorrow."

"Are you sure?"

"As sure as I can be." He replied with a subtle sigh, and finally pulled away just enough to look at Robin once more. "Perhaps we should see the bright side of things, too, for once."

"And that would be?"

"I can keep you here with me all night without any remorse."

A loud snort escaped Robin as they both got up from the ground to get ready for bed at last, and she couldn't help the smirk that just then tugged at her lips. "As if you've ever felt any ounce of guilt over that before…"

"Officially, I have."

"Officially, I shouldn't even be here in the first place for you to feel guilty over."

"Good thing we make our own rules then."

"Indeed."

… … …

Falling asleep that night, surprisingly, turned out to be less troublesome than Robin had anticipated. Once they both were curled up under the soft covers, wrapped tightly into each other's arms in the fierce comfort of utmost protectiveness, they were both out like a light within seconds. While it still hadn't been often that they'd gotten to spend the night like this, it currently was the reassurance of each other's presence that made it possible to find sleep in the first place, and while Robin would've found more excitement in it under different circumstances, it was the calmness that gifted her a dreamless sleep for what was left of the night to rest.

The morning, however, was everything but calm in return. It was Sunday, sure, but when they woke up five minutes after breakfast had started, the world came crashing down on them rather abruptly. In all due haste, it took them only a few minutes to get ready and hide the box of parchments in one of the shelves before they quickly made their way towards the great hall. Together, for once, since Snape had absolutely refused to let Robin wander through the empty hallways alone, and Robin had given up her protests before she had even gotten properly started. When Snape had set his mind to something, there was little to nothing she could do about it. And honestly, she found herself rather glad about that.

As always, they did go separate ways once they reached the doors to the great hall though, and Robin didn't hesitate to make her way inside and towards the Slytherin table already, while trying to catch her breath after almost having to run to keep up with Snape. At some point, when there wasn't such a pressing reason to hurry, she would have to remind him that his legs were about double as long as hers, which made it nigh impossible to keep up sometimes. Or at least it felt like that; she would have to remember to bring it up at some point. Unfortunately, it was only when Robin spotted Gideon and Michael that she remembered something else, namely the thing she had forgotten about last night. Their challenge, which really hadn't been one in the first place. Oh bloody hell… she had forgotten to take a proper look into her memories to check the stupid order of the stupid items on Morgan's stupid desk. But seriously, there had been so much more urgent matters at hand! Bloody fucking hell though, for she still couldn't tell them that. She still had to put on a smile and joke as if there wasn't some ridiculous life changing prophecy at work. Great.

"Got up on the wrong foot, eh?" Gideon greeted her with a smirk right when Robin reached their little group in the middle of the long table. "You look like someone's turned your shower cold while you were still under it."

"Something like that, yeah." She sighed in return, then dropped down into the seat between Jorien and Simon that had been saved for her. "Anyway, good morning to you, too."

Granted, her friends did try to cheer her up during breakfast, and Robin found herself sighing inwardly more than once while she put on a fake smile and, sometimes, could even muster up a real one. Her occasional glances towards the head table were kindly ignored like always, her 'hmm's for an answer as well, and at last she almost believed that the boys had forgotten about the challenge for good when after twenty minutes still nobody had asked about it. But of course, fate or whatever entity was currently messing with her wasn't as kind as to let her off the hook that easily.

"So, when are we finally going to talk about yesterday's evening activities?" Cas asked with a beaming and giddy smile that made Robin want to strangle her in an instant. Honestly, she loved Cas, but the girl had the most awful timing known to human history.

"Oh yes, right!" Gideon jumped right onto the train of thought, and even dropped his toast while his gaze flew over to Robin. "Where's that proof you promised, huh?"

Under different circumstances, Robin would've straight up snarled at the boy's smug expression and quieted his every inquiry with a single glare. But she had more or less promised them proof, and she had most definitely promised herself to keep her friends out of this mess. So she had to live with the consequences now, even if they majorly annoyed her. Sighing inwardly, she tried to recall the details about Morgan's desk, what it had looked like, what items he kept on there… Perhaps a rough description would have to do. Or, perhaps indeed, it would only take one single detail, a detail that almost nobody could know of. Well, unless they had carefully searched through his desk like she had, of course. Yes, that certainly would do to serve as proof for the boys! Why on earth hadn't she thought of that before?! With a mostly feigned mischievous smile, Robin leaned onto her lower arms and over the table, closer to Gideon and Michael. Unsurprisingly, every single one of her friends followed suit and leaned in closer to her as well. The fact that they were already so used to her antics rendered her smile a little more real, and a little less bitter.

"Alright, but don't judge me before you've checked the facts yourself." She started, once she was sure that all five of her friends were listening. Even Jorien and Simon, who had shown absolutely no interest in the entire endeavour last night, were intently paying attention now. "In the locked drawer in his desk, Morgan keeps a book on beautifying spells 'for the modern gentleman'."

It took a second, but then Michael and Gideon burst into laughter, while Simon and the girls simply gaped at Robin as if she'd told them that a spaceship had crashed in Hogsmeade. Admittedly, both reactions amused Robin quite a bit in return, which served as a most welcome distraction from the morning's hasty gloom. The book had indeed been an amusing discovery, now that she thought of it. One that she had previously simply ignored in order to focus on the greater good, the bigger plan, the more important matters. Well, perhaps it did her some good now to remember that there were other things in life than the big problems. That Morgan was also just a human being, with flaws and secrets and weird mannerisms. It certainly made breathing a little easier for now.

"That is absolutely hilarious." Gideon snorted a moment later, after he had finally managed to catch his breath. "I honestly hope it's true."

"Of course it's true!" Cas snapped back at him, even though the fact still seemed to irritate her at the same time. "Robin doesn't lie…"

"Thank you." Robin gave the girl a half smile and a nod, then turned back towards the boys across from her. "I consider this inane challenge completed now, but you are of course free to verify my claim."

"I believe you." Michael shrugged with another humoured huff. "Would explain why the guy's always so…"

"Pretty?" Gideon suggested with raised eyebrows, and Michael nodded in agreement. "Pretty is a good way to describe it."

"Petty would be even more like it." Robin sighed under her breath, but her own thought made her snort a second later nonetheless. Arrogance wouldn't help her, but if she was stuck in a limbo between confidence and fear already, she might as well enjoy the highs for now before the lows came back to haunt her.

"Speaking of petty, you won't believe what that pillock Justin did last night!" Gideon said, and Michael just groaned in return before shoving his friend and rolling his eyes.

"Who the frick is Justin?" Jorien asked with an indignant frown in return, which almost made Robin snort again, for the girl, as so often, displayed a copycat version of Robin's own thoughts.

"Some guy in their house." Cas answered with a roll of her eyes, but more at the subject than because of her friend's question. "He should be in Robin's year, actually, but knowing her, she probably has no idea who he is either."

"Caught me. I still don't care about the people in my year." Robin shrugged with one shoulder and kept her eyes on her toast, but she didn't cease to listen curiously to the elaborations around her at the same time.

"Anyway, Justin was helping us with our charms essays last night. Or rather, he was supposed to help us, but ended up being a stupid pillock about it." Gideon went on to explain.

"Yeah, he is really good at charms." Michael continued in a sigh where Gideon had stopped. "But he didn't even try to help us! Properly, I mean. He could've just answered our bloody questions, or pointed us to books that would have helped, but no, he had to make it all even more difficult by giving us even more questions! Questions and problems and… ugh! He honestly just made it more difficult for us to get the bloody essay done."

"I bet he didn't even want to help us." Gideon made a face, and Micheal nodded once again in agreement. "He probably just wanted to make himself look clever in front of the girls in the common room. Honestly, next time we'll just do it by ourselves."

"Or ask Robin."

"Right."

Robin nodded; of course she would help them with their stupid essays if they asked, she always did, but that was entirely besides the point right now. Her thoughts were already drifting off into another direction entirely, to something they hadn't even said, and that yet their rambling had triggered in Robin's mind. A thought, an idea… a perspective! A rush of adrenaline started burning down her veins, and her eyes just as her thoughts inevitably moved away from her breakfast and her friends, towards the head table, then towards Snape. It took but a few more seconds for his eyes to meet hers, and another for his mind to reach out to her.

'That look on your face is not about the dunderhead gang, is it?' He asked, straight to the point, which Robin was as always grateful for.

'No. We need to talk. With words. Now.' Her reply was a mere staccato, phrased like that in order for her request to even come out clear over the mess her thoughts had become once more. Going by the look on his face, he had understood her nonetheless.

'Astronomy tower. In five minutes.'

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[magicalthoughtsendinterriblefics]

Cinderelly - Request

Requested by anon: do you think you could do a fic where draco malfoy meets a girl in a class and he really likes her but then the next week he meets a boy in the same class and really likes him and he's really torn up between them but it turns out it is the same person but their genderfluid

bisexual!Draco x gender-fluid!reader where Draco meets them at a party as a boy and falls in love but meets them in the dining hall as a girl and falls in love and he is torn between them but it turns out to be the same gender-fluid person and it ends in some fluffy kissing maybe.

Word count: 1,868

Warnings: None.

A/N: As you may know, I am not genderfluid nor do I know any genderfluid person (like in real life), so this one was hard. I tried to investigate as much as I could but I can’t promise that it will be just right. So I’d be very thankful if you could give me some feedback about this cuz all I want is for everyone here to feel included and I want to do it right. With that being said:

Enjoy!

Bells were tolling, marking the end of the first period and thus the start of the second period. The students changed classrooms quickly, chatting as fast and loud as possible before they had to be quiet again.

Draco walked with his head down. Not wanting to talk to anyone, he tried his best to look unavailable. He had gotten into a fight with his friends; they expected things from that he just wasn’t comfortable with and so he was alone.

His second period class was Potions. His head teacher, Professor Snape, was well aware of the situation between Draco, Crabbe and Goyle and so he announced he’d be assigning the seats for the class.

Everyone but Draco complained. He knew Professor Snape did it for him and was silently thankful for that.

Professor Snape started pairing people who “had the same level and understanding in Magic”, so Draco figured he would be paired up with Hermione Granger. He was okay with the idea, he actually admired her and maybe that was his chance to let her know… Since he wasn’t hanging with his usual friends, maybe, just maybe, he could change a bit.

However, Miss Granger got paired up with a girl from Ravenclaw. Harry Potter got paired up with some girl from Hufflepuff, and the Weasley boy got paired up with the kid that makes everything explode.

Who would he be paired up with?

“(Y/N) (Y/L/N)” Professor Snape called, “your partner will be Draco Malfoy.”

Draco looked back at the person Professor Snape had called. It was a very nice looking girl from (Y/HH).

The girl approached shyly at first, but once she put her books on the table she started gaining confidence.

Draco couldn’t help but to be amused with how agile she was with potions. She solved problems like once blows dust from an old book, and prepared potions as if they were tea. She was skilled to say the least, but she was also nice.

Draco thought for a second that she’d hate on him. It would’ve been justified since he was usually a narcissistic brat, that one rich kid no one stands, and he genuinely didn’t talk to anyone but his friends and often to Potter and his friends (but that was just to be mean). Why was she nice?

They finished the first potion rather quickly. Not even Granger and her partner did so by the time they were done, so they had a couple minutes to chat.

“I like your hair,” Draco said. He knew how to make people like him; he just figured he’d never need such skills before.

“Thanks,” she replied with a sincere smile.

“I feel like it’s… different,” he continued, “I feel like anyone could pull it off but not really.” The girl tilted her cute face to a side, not knowing if it was a compliment or not, “do you think I could pull it off?”

She laughed and shook her head.

“You might be right, that kind of hairstyle is only for cool people.”

“You think I’m cool?” She asked.

“I think you’re different and, from where I stand, that’s the equivalent of being cool.”

She blushed slightly and thanked him with a whisper.

“I think you’re cool when you are not with your bully friends.”

“I don’t think I’ll be around them much often then,” Draco stated and they giggled. “No, but really, I think you’re very nice.”

“You’re very straightforward, Mr Malfoy.” She stepped back a little.

“Mr Malfoy is my father, and though he will hear about this,” he joked, “I actually would like it very much if you just called me Draco.”

“Okay… I’m (Y/N)” she stretched her hand and Draco shook it with his.

The instructions for the second potion were given almost right after that, and they finished it quickly between laughs and a nice chat. The third one was a bit harder, so Draco, who was absolutely focused, didn’t have the opportunity to continue talking to her.

When the bell rang once again, she was gone without a trace. Lost among hordes of talkative children.

He wanted to find her, she was nice and a good person to begin with. He could show how much of a good guy he was if given the chance and she had given it to him. But how could he find her?

The school was too big, the hallways were too loud, and though he knew her name he was too shy and proud to just go around asking everyone for her. No, he didn’t want to seem desperate.

“Are you coming?” a kid from the Slytherin quidditch team asked. Draco was sitting alone at the common room.

“Where?”

“To the Halloween party,” the kid replied as if it were obvious.

“Oh, yes, I just need to get dressed,” Draco replied. The party was the perfect place to find the girl, or at least to try and find her because he wasn’t sure she’d be there.

He got dressed all in black and went upstairs.

The stairs, the Entrance, and the Great Hall were all filled with people. Kids from all years and houses along with the teacher and Hogwarts’s ghosts chatted excitedly as traditional music played on the background.

The tables were fully served with tons of different options, from snacks to main dishes, and floating pumpkins ornamented the ceiling. It was truly a magnificent view.

Draco had always liked the castle. He thought of it as an architectural masterpiece that was wasted as a school when it might as well be a museum of magic. Of course, he was partly thankful it was that school because he could live in the castle. But nonetheless, he felt like such beauty could be used in a better way.

The minutes passed and the nice girl from Potions call was nowhere to be seen.

“You lost something?” A soft voice called.

Draco’s heart rushed as he looked behind his back, only to find a tiny boy with a red costume.

“What are you dressed up as?” Draco inquired.

The boy looked down to his outfit and shrugged. “It’s supposed to be a dragon, but I really can’t see it.”

Draco nodded and looked to the sides, in search of the girl.

“What are you dressed up as?” The boy asked him.

“A wizard,” Draco replied and the boy scoffed.

“Wow” the boy said in a sarcastic tone, “you are so cool, oh my God.”

Draco chuckled and finally focused his attention on the boy.

“I didn’t have a costume,” he explained. “And I did lose something.”

“Maybe I can help you find it.”

“I lost a girl. Her name is (Y/N),” Draco told him, “do you know her?”

“I do,” the boy said, “we’re close, actually.”

“Where is she?”

“She’s not coming,” the boy said. “So I guess you’re stuck with me now.”

Draco frowned, not entirely understanding that jump of logic. But hey, he was trying new things after all so he agreed.

The night went by rather quickly by the boy’s side. He was charming, chill, and so funny. It was no wonder to Draco that the boy and (Y/N) could be close friends, as a matter of fact, they could’ve been twins and Draco would’ve believed it. They were too similar, even physically.

“I think you’re a cool kid, Draco Malfoy,” the boy said.

“You too,” Draco replied. They were at the bridge that led to the boat house, far away from the actual party.

“You know?” The boy said, “I am quite impulsive sometimes and…” Suddenly, the boy pecked Draco’s lips.

At first, Draco was shocked. He didn’t expect a kiss from that boy but, once that first shock passed, he couldn’t help but to melt in his lips.

He felt like he was somehow cheating on the girl, but also not really. It felt right, it felt like they belonged together.

They kissed and kissed for what felt like an eternal instant and then the boy pulled away.

“I hope you liked it,” he said.

“I did,” Draco replied and tried to kiss him again but the boy stepped back.

“I hope you can learn to like me as I am,” he continued. Draco tilted his head, not entirely understanding what he meant.

The midnight bell tolled.

“Better get going,” the boy said.

“Why?” Draco asked.

“Cinderella’s spell will break.”

Draco shrugged, not understanding what he meant by that, as the boy ran back to his dorm.

A whole week passed and Draco hadn’t seen either the boy or the girl. He was confused to say the least, and quite frankly he was sad and alone again.

Crabbe and Goyle seemed to be better off without him, so he didn’t even bother in trying to make peace with them. Instead, he decided to embrace his solitude.

He would spend every afternoon hidden near the Black Lake. He’d sit under a tree and read whatever he had available, and just get lost in the calm sounds of nature.

The last day of the week, while he was dozing off to the sound of birds, he heard branches breaking. He wasn’t going to pay much attention to that. Lots of kids went out to that side of the forest to play with their friends, they couldn’t be much bother.

He closed his eyes again and got lost in the memory of those eyes, both the boy and the girl had amazing (Y/E/C) eyes, and their smile was so big and warm, and their voices were soft, and their hair… They had almost the same hairstyle.

Draco opened his eyes again, only to find those same eyes staring at him.

“Hi,” they said.

“Hi,” Draco greeted, his own eyes were wide.

“Long time no see,” they joked and Draco nodded.

“So… this is me,” they said. “I know it might be weird… I don’t know if you’re into… Or if I’m being pushy, or…”

“No,” Draco stated. “Not at all… Pushy, I mean. You’re not pushy.”

They smiled.

“So you finally understood who I am?”

Draco smiled back at them and smiled warmly.

“Do you think you can handle it?”

“I think I don’t have to handle anything because it’s not really an issue to handle,” Draco said and their smile widened so much all of their teeth were visible, and their cheeks blushed and they just radiated joy that was so contagious even Draco started blushing.

“I just wished you had told me from the beginning,” Draco mumbled after a couple minutes.

“What’s the fun in that?” They giggled.

Draco giggled too and looked down shyly. He had never felt this way before. He could never be vulnerable, or nice, or sweet with any other friend so he wasn’t sure how to proceed.

“This is the part where you kiss me,” they said, dragging Draco out of his mind.

“What?”

“This is the part where you kiss me.”

“Oh damn, you’re right.”

And so, Draco touched her face softly, and gently pulled her closer to his lips. Yes, those were the lips he had kissed before and they were probably the lips he’d be kissing for a long time after.

-

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[aileenjasperprince]

Trans Man Snape

It’s definitely a personal bias why I like this headcanon, but I think there are a lot of great points in the text that it adds a depth of character that there wouldn’t otherwise be.

I like to start out with young Severus wearing female clothes that don’t fit him. It makes a lot more sense that he was given his mother’s clothes if he was AFAB, even if he was presenting himself as a boy to muggles. It also makes Petunia’s comment about the “Snape boy” which emphasizes the fact that his boyhood is suspect (even if it is just gay coded).

Thinking of a trans boy at Hogwarts and how he is completely accepted as a boy and unquestioned is fabulous. The bullying that continues and goes on, not so much, but that might be where the dynamic between the Mauraders and Snape change. The werewolf incident was a discovering of each other’s secret and an unbreakable vow about not sharing said secret (the secret being Snape is trans and the Mauraders are unregistered animagi)...thus why Snape is worried about Black when everyone else isn’t because he knows Black is around but can’t tell anyone because of the unbreakable vow. Of course the Mauraders try and find a back door to this by pretending a harmless prank is harmless when they are really trying to expose what they promised to keep secret in a way that doesn’t break the promise (however, Severus had sought transition help before then so it isn’t as terrible as it might seem).

However, I do think the truth of Snape being trans did make it to the headmaster with the werewolf incident and Dumbledore admired the Mauraders for keeping his secret, making Snape promise to not tell on Lupin to be as honorable as them. I also think that Dumbledore is transphobic and that his opinion and view on Snape changed with that incident and Severus hated him for it. He felt belittled and disrespected and unable to have safety and help from the headmaster because the headmaster saw him as a girl playing with the big boys instead of as a boy growing up into a man.

I think it was this point that had Severus running to Voldemort’s ranks after graduation. Voldemort knew he was trans and supported that and did all he could to make sure no one else in his ranks even doubted Severus’s manhood. I like to think that he took an active roll in the ranks instead of being on the sidelines for this purpose. But as the violence grew, Voldemort started to be transphobic in concern about the growth of the magic population. Severus took refuge in Regulus’s attraction for him (even though Regulus never knew Severus was trans) and began taking the passive role to avoid confrontation.

Voldemort took this opportunity to try and place Severus as a spy, especially if Snape was to fulfill his role in helping the magical population grow. Dumbledore saw right through it when Severus came for the Defense Against the Dark Arts position (with Voldemort’s promise that if he did his part he would lift the curse on the position), and rejected Severus....until he had a prophecy that needed to be heard (stealing this one idea from a post I saw recently). A prophecy where he knew Lily, Snape’s ex-best friend, would be affected, a prophecy where he knew he could turn Snape into a double agent because Dumbledore could see how Snape had gone from being in the front lines to being in the background, knew loyalty was a problem.

The prophecy came at the worst time for Snape, Bellatrix had found out he was trans and Voldemort forced her into secrecy. Regulus had gone missing and from recent talks with Regulus, Severus knew he wasn’t coming back. The pressure was mounting from the Dark Lord to reproduce and get results from the passive role, so much that Severus resorted to potions in order to not lose his position entirely. The prophecy seemed like his redemption. The moment where he could be moved from the passive role to the active. Asking for Lily was not only for his care for his best friend, but to let the Dark Lord know that he had found a way to be fertile as a man through magic and didn’t need to be put back in the female role. In the end, the Dark Lord told him to take the same plea to Dumbledore and become the double agent.

From that moment, Severus knew he couldn’t trust Voldemort to save Lily or to care for him as a person. Names and pronouns was common human decency that even the headmaster gave him even though he patronized Severus. It was all a ploy to get him on their side. The attractiveness of being in control of information, becoming vital to both sides of the war, to having the option to choose what he really felt was right was what led him to the hillside on that windy, windy day. But he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t ask for the Defense Against the Dark Arts position. At that moment he knew that there was no place in the world where he would be accepted. He wanted to protect Lily and then be dead. He didn’t realize the prophecy was a set-up for him to take the role as double agent.

Dumbledore put him in the feminine position of potions, claiming it was due to the curse even though he was aware that Voldemort would lift the curse. Dumbledore really wanted Snape to remember that he was first and foremost female and planned on never fully trusting him until he reverted into his natural form. Severus did it for Lily and used her memory to keep himself alive. Luckily the staff, including those that had helped him transition, were much more supportive. Their support was what helped him survive Lily’s death. They gave him enough of a will to live that he moved his living to protect Lily to living to protect Harry. He also agreed with Dumbledore that Voldemort would come back due to Regulus’s ramblings, but he never shared anything of that part of his life with Dumbledore because he knew it would only have Dumbledore be more patronizing (Instead of a lesbian who felt she had to be a man to like women, he would be considered a straight woman just causing problems).

No foolish wand-waving are his words to his first years. Snape understands masculinity and its strength and weaknesses. He doesn’t want them to be like the Mauraders who used their masculinity to harm. He wants them to use it properly. He wants to show that masculinity and femininity go hand in hand in both the female and the male magical arts. Lockhart greatly reminded him of that imbalance.

The year with Lupin was the worst. The support from Dumbledore was dwindling because Snape had not forgiven the Mauraders. There were many fights where the truth finally spilled out that Dumbledore didn’t trust him because he wasn’t a woman, maybe not word for word, but Snape got the picture. Snape had done everything asked of him and still he was doubted and mistrusted. It was then that he had to decide whose side was he on. What did Severus really want?

Respect, common decency, and the ability to live his own life. Since he clearly would never have that in his own life he decided he would fight for that. He decided he would protect Harry even when those wanting him to were being cruel. Harry deserved to live and have his own life. It did help that the thought of getting revenge on Black and Lupin was part of that plan.

The support from Dumbledore still was not there the next year started, but Severus was better for he had found his own purpose. The warnings were coming that Voldemort was coming back and Snape was preparing and trying to get Dumbledore and McGonagall to prepare. It was McGonagall who pushed Dumbledore to realize that Snape was telling the truth and that Dumbledore was being unreasonable for expecting a man to stop being a man just because Dumbledore wanted him to. It didn’t really click for Dumbledore until Snape showed Fudge the mark on his arm. It was then Dumbledore started to realize and appreciate Snape and everything that he was instead of wanting him to be everything he wasn’t. He regretted not listening to him earlier because the imposter Moody would’ve been found out sooner if Snape had met support from Dumbledore instead of doubt.

After a year of Snape’s devoted courage, Dumbledore realized he was in the wrong. It didn’t help that he had many instances where he saw Snape’s defense against the dark arts knowledge used to save the day. Dumbledore almost regretted not having his current army more trained by having put Snape in that position to begin with and had Voldemort remove the curse. Dumbledore knew that with a limited life expectancy that he needed to rectify one last wrong and gave Snape the defense against the dark arts position. He knew it was symbolic to Severus as recognition of his manhood. It was the least he could do.

Killing Dumbledore was the last straw for McGonagall for Snape because it felt like Snape had to assert his dominance over Dumbledore for refusing to fully recognize him for so long. She said some fairly hateful and at times transphobic words to him in his reign as headmaster. While the position of headmaster secured his names and pronouns, he found that being expected to be evil while leading the school to be as painful as being expected to live as a woman. There was something painful about living contrary to who you are, but it was a price he was willing to pay for a short time to make it so that people would be free and not live as he had to live. It was the same justification he gave for the need for Harry to die.

Snape had hoped to die after giving Harry the necessary memory by dueling Voldemort as a distraction to give Harry time. As master of the elder wand (another gift from Dumbledore to assert Snape’s masculinity to Voldemort), Snape expected a duel to the death. A time to finally let his power shine and his masculinity be asserted, only losing because Voldemort could not die...perhaps leaving a time bomb of a curse to kill Voldemort once all the horcruxes (for he knew what they were now, no thanks to Dumbledore) were destroyed, including Harry.

But that was not so. Snape never got to Harry because Voldemort wouldn’t let him go and fight like a man. Voldemort was clinging to Snape as a broken woman. It hurt and Snape tried to not let it show because then his loyalty would be questioned, but it hurt enough to not have him fight back as Voldemort used the snake to kill Snape. Voldemort wouldn’t lift his want to kill him and it was the gravest insult. He would fail his feminine role because he wasn’t a woman.

Voldemort left and the relief of seeing someone who never acted like he knew he was trans arrived. It was a relief, it really felt like seeing Lily again. The first person who never questioned the fact that he was a boy. It was his chance to prove mastery of both femininity and masculinity is what wins and gave Harry what he needed before drifting out of a life of lies and deceit because people felt he was lying and deceiving for being who he was. The green eyes were a promise that people like Severus would never be treated this way again.

#trans snape #headcanon #severus snape #trans man snape #i fully support trans fem or trans woman snape #these are just my opinions from my experience with the text #definitely biased in my own favor for a character i very much relate to

[dadsnape]

Snape’s Snakes #2

Snape’s demeanour isn’t always the most pleasant but when it come to the well being of his snakes he really goes above and beyond. In a way when each Slytherin is sorted into his house they gain a father in Snape, regardless of whether they had one before.

Augusta Rookwood is the daughter of Augustus Rookwood the now imprisoned Death Eater. She’s found that there are those willing to hold that against her especially those who’s families were victim to her father’s crimes. 

(Trigger Warnings: Bullying, Swearing)

"Finite incatatum." The spell around Augusta's legs finally faded. She tried to move, relieved when she was able to bend her legs once more even if they were a little stiff. She sighed bringing her knees to her chest. That leg locker jinx had been unexpected and she was sure she was already late for Potions. She wiped her damp eyes deciding Snape would likely be just as angry at her for being five minutes late as he would for twenty minutes. There was no point in rushing down to the dungeons.

Her head hurt a little and when she touched the source of the pain her fingers came away red. She winced, she’d hit her head against the wall when she’d fallen. She hadn’t been ready for the attack and when she drew her wand to cancel the jinx a disarming spell had sent it flying down the stairs. No one had helped her, no one ever did. Not that she expected them to.

The laughs from her attacker had echoed in her ears as she eased her way down the staircase, dragging her bound legs along like dead weight. As she moved she’d cursed herself for allowing this to happen, it had only been a momentary lapse in concentration and her attackers had got the best of her.

She’d finally reached her wand and thankfully it was unbroken. She didn’t know what she’d do without her wand. Without it she was defenceless and that was a feeling Augusta wanted to avoid at all costs.

Augusta stood slowly, using the wall to support her. She slipped her wand back into her pocket and made her way on unsteady legs towards the girl’s toilets. The toilets were empty, not that Augusta expected there to be many people there. Most students had class now and those with free periods wouldn’t spend it on the first floor of all places. She stumbled over to a sink, turning the water on and carefully rinsing her face. It took her a long moment before she was able to look up at herself in the mirror.

Her lip curled back over her teeth as she touched the small graze on her forehead gingerly. It bled steadily but luckily the wound was minor. She just hoped she didn’t have another concussion she was getting fed up of explaining to Madame Pomfrey where all these injuries were coming from. Lucky for her the Matron seemed content to believe her lies about accidental falls and would only chide her for being so clumsy.

Augusta retreated into a stall, grabbing some toilet paper and holding it to her head. She leaned against the wall, closing her eyes as she waited for the bleeding to stop. The words of her attackers were burned into her mind, they repeated over and over leaving her stomach churning with things she didn’t want to think about right now. Evil, vile, dirty and worst of all, Death Eater.

She returned to the mirror, checking on the bleeding, glad to find that it had slowed to a stop. She drew her wand and banished the wad of toilet paper before pointing it towards her head.  

“Dissimulato.” She said clearly, waving the her wand over the graze. Her skin blurred before her eyes and looking at her reflection she could see a blurry shape almost the same colour as her skin concealing the injury. She sighed hoping it would work for now. At least it was less obvious than the red mark that had been there before, only Dowson and her gang would know to look for it. It still hurt of course but there was little she could do about that unless she could get her hands on some salve for it.

It was about time she made her way to Potions. She gulped not looking forward to facing Snape’s wrath. He wasn’t going to be pleased but skipping wasn’t an option, he’d be angrier if she skipped entirely, he might even throw her out of his N.E.W.T level Potions class entirely and she couldn’t have that, she needed to pass that class.

As she made her way down to the dungeons she imagined Dowson giggling to her friend at her entrance. How their eyes would skip over the glamoured mark on her forehead. She wondered how many students would have heard what happened. Dowson wasn’t exactly the best at keeping her mouth shut.

She took a deep breath as she stared at the door leading into the classroom, brushing her hair over her forehead just in case Snape were to notice that a patch of her forehead wasn’t quite the same colour as the rest. Waiting wouldn’t make anything better, if Snape found her skulking out here he wouldn’t be pleased. With this in mind she opened the door, ducking her head as she entered.

Snape was giving a lecture at the front of the class, a huge cauldron in front of him. The room smelt strangely of woodsmoke and something else extremely distinctive that felt so familiar yet she couldn’t quite place. She heard sniggering from across the room and noticed Dowson grinning at her.

“Silence!” Snape snapped, sending a glare her way before turning his attention to Augusta. Augusta shrunk back under the black look he fixed her with. “Nice of you to join us Miss Rookwood.” He hissed, his voice dripping with venom. Augusta cringed back but gave him what she hoped was an apologetic look “If it isn’t too much trouble then perhaps you could take your seat and cease this disruption of my class.”

“Yes sir, sorry.” She said clearly as she ducked her head and made her way towards her seat next to Gemma Farley. The girl looked at her questioningly but quickly turned her attention back to Snape.

She sat down quietly and looked over at Snape. She could feel his dark eyes scrutinising her and she wished she could shrink back in her seat. He quickly recovered continuing his lecture as if she’d never entered. Augusta tried to follow along but it was tough having missed the first part. The potion she gathered was Amortentia. A powerful love potion that smelled different to each person according to what attracted them. That explained the wonderful scent coming from the cauldron.

“As such this potion is extremely dangerous. Today you will be brewing an antidote for Amortentia I expect your potions to be finished within the hour and on my desk.” Snape drawled. “I’d advise you to put great effort into your antidote for I’ll be grading it to Newt standard.” He paused looking over the class with a look of distaste. “Well. Why haven’t you started?” The classroom erupted into activity, people making their way to collect their cauldrons and start brewing.

Augusta took a deep breath savouring the scent of the Amortentia before Snape banished it with a flick of his wand. She quickly pulled out her potions textbook finding the recipe for the antidote and moving to gather the ingredients she needed.

Most of the class were already returning to their cauldrons when she entered the storeroom. Only a Ravenclaw boy she couldn’t remember the name of remained. His eyes widened when she entered and he flinched back as if she’d hurt him. Augusta fixed him with withering look trying to ignore the way her heart ached to see him afraid of her. He had nothing to fear. Not from her. The boy sidestepped around her a darted out of the room as if he’d been stung.  

She went to take a sprig of peppermint from the container in the storeroom only for the bowl shoot up in the air and tip its contents over her head. A cruel laugh sounded behind her.

“Oops.” Dowson sneered, her wand in her hand. She supposed she should be glad it was only peppermint this time, last time it was sloth brain mucus and it had taken hours to wash that stuff out of her hair. “Careful Rookwood you’re causing a mess as usual.”

Augusta glared at her, pulling her wand out in one smooth motion. Dowson took a step back, pointing her own wand at her threateningly. “You going to curse me?” She asked harshly. Augusta flinched but met her gaze evenly, even as her brow furrowed at her words. “Go on do your best.” Dowson hissed. “I’m sure Snape would love to see what sort of dark magic you come out with.”

Augusta looked away, her stomach churning. She lowered her wand, she wouldn’t fight Dowson. Especially not here, there was little she could do anyway. Any spell she could throw at the other girl would only confirm what they all thought of her. That she was nothing but the daughter of a Death Eater, someone who would join the Dark Lord as soon as he returned, if he ever returned.

Dowson scoffed looking at her with an expression of contempt. “What’s wrong? Can’t remember anything your pathetic excuse of a daddy taught you?” She sneered, Augusta tensed, a shock-wave running through her as if she’d been cursed. “Or was he too busy to teach you? Huh? Too busy murdering muggles. Tell me did he not want anything to do with you after torturing my sister?” Augusta inhaled sharply, her words like a knife between her ribs. Her lips curling over her teeth as she raised her wand, aiming the tip directly between Dowson’s eyes.

“Shut up.” She snarled, she could feel her eyes burning with tears, she willed them not to fall. If she cried now she wouldn’t be able to live down the humiliation. Dowson only laughed, raising her own wand hesitantly.

“Oh hit a nerve have I?” Dowson jeered, Augusta held her ground, staring her dead in the eyes her wand at the ready. Dowson wouldn’t get a free curse in this time. She noticed the way the other girls hands shook slightly and smirked.

“What’s wrong Dowson? Scared? I thought Gryffindors were supposed to be brave. Or do you prefer targets that aren’t ready to fight back?”

“How dare you!” Dowson snarled. “You’re one to talk about courage. With your coward of a father, not even brave enough to go kill defenceless muggles on his own. How many families did your scumbag father murder? How many children?” Augusta’s lip curled back over her teeth, she took a step forwards her eyes blazing ready to wipe that smug look of Dowson’s face one and for all.

“What is going on in here?” Snape barked, appearing in the doorway. Augusta shrunk back, the fire inside her dying immediately leaving only an empty numbness accompanied by guilt. She had forgotten herself, she had intended to really hurt Dowson. She would have proved to everyone they were right. She hung her head, her hands shaking very slightly.

Snape looked between the two girls with a look of utter rage. Augusta quickly shoved her wand back into her pocket. Looking away from him. The colour was draining from Dowson’s face as she looked up at Snape, Augusta supposed she should be pleased to see the girl knocked down a peg or two but instead she just felt vaguely sick.

“As I would hope you’ve noticed though perhaps not considering your dunderheaded actions, this is a potions storeroom not a duelling ground.” Snape hissed, Augusta glanced at him, his words were directed towards Dowson not her. “Put your wand away you foolish girl. Thirty points from Gryffindor for starting fights. Another ten for choosing such a senseless location, an errant spell in here could be disastrous, I shouldn’t have to explain why to sixth year students.” Dowson flushed, putting her wand away quickly sending a glare Augusta’s way as she did so.  

“You have your ingredients Miss Dowson now get to your potion.” The girl turned picking up the ingredients she had already gathered that she’d dropped on the floor when Snape entered and rushed out of the room. Augusta wiped her eyes quickly hoping Dowson hadn’t noticed the few tears that had nearly escaped her.

Peppermint still littered the floor and sat tangled in Augusta’s hair so she worked on plucking it out. She kneeled down to clean up the mess on the floor. Snape was silent for a long moment as he turned his dark glare to her. “Make haste Miss Rookwood, I will not be making allowances for partially brewed potions.” He snarled. “Get your ingredients and start brewing now.”

“But sir.” Augusta looked at the mess. Snape waved his wand and the loose peppermint vanished. Augusta tried to ignore the instinct that screamed at her to draw her own wand at the sight of his.  

“Your potion Rookwood.”

“Yes sir.” Augusta said quickly grabbing the rest of what she needed almost knocking a jar of flobberworms over as she did so, she grabbed it in shaking hands just in time pushing it back onto the shelf unharmed.

“Miss Rookwood if you damage any more of my ingredients I assure you you’ll be helping me harvest bubotuber pus for the rest of the month.” Snape warned  as she stood aside to let her out of the cupboard.

“Sorry sir.” She could feel Snape glaring at her as she rushed past him with her ingredients in her hands.

“Dirty Death Eater.” She heard Dowson hiss as she passed her. Augusta ground her teeth together but made her way towards her cauldron. Snape returned to patrolling the classroom, occasionally stopping near someone’s cauldron and disparagingly commenting on their potion.

Augusta began chopping her ingredients while waiting for the base, which for this potion was purified water, to boil. She felt something hit her back and flinched, itching to hold her wand and send a defensive spell over he back. She could hear snickering behind her. Something hit the back of her head and she ran her fingers through her hair pulling out a billywig wing and placing it in her pile of the useless parts of the ingredients to be thrown away later. She sighed as more pieces of random ingredients landed over her work space getting mixed up with the neat piles of ingredients she was preparing. She picked out the contamination as best she could but knew her potion wouldn’t be her best work today.

Augusta worked quickly, adding the ingredients at the correct intervals and stirring carefully. The potion bubbled quietly turning a dark blue. She frowned knowing it was supposed to be light blue at this stage. Something flew past her ear and if it hadn’t been for her reflexes, swinging her arm out and knocking it away it would have landed in her mixture. She could hear Dowson giggling loudly behind her.

“Miss Dowson! Concentrate on your potion or leave my class.” Snape yelled suddenly. “And five points from Gryffindor for the disruption.” The giggling stopped abruptly and luckily so did the flying ingredients. Augusta sighed, looking down at her potion and trying her best to focus on it despite the twisting in her stomach.

Snape finally came to her cauldron. He leaned over it, wrinkling his nose as he peered into the dark coloured liquid. Augusta kept her head down as she cut up her billywigs. Hyper aware of Snape who stood silently by her cauldron. She waited for him to scold her brew, she knew it was far from perfect not that it was entirely her fault. She doubted it would even have its intended effect. As much as she hated to admit it Dowson’s words in the storeroom had rattled her which had made concentrating on her potion difficult even if it hadn’t been for the girl’s constant attempts to sabotage her.

When Augusta looked up Snape noticed him looking at her oddly. “See me after class Miss Rookwood.” She frowned, wondering if her potion was really that bad, she slouched in defeat. It looked like she wouldn’t be catching a break today.

“Yes sir.” She mumbled, staring into her potion. She could hear Dowson sniggering behind her, she wished she’d stop.

“Death Eater’s in trouble.” She hissed loudly to her friend as soon as Snape had moved on. Augusta scowled into her potion, adding her billywigs a little more roughly than she intended and splashing the desk in boiling fluid. She jumped back just in time to avoid any coming in contact with her skin.

The rest of the lesson passed uneventfully. Mostly, Dowson seemed keen on mocking her behind Snape’s back even after he snapped at her and deducted even more points from Gryffindor. It took him threatening to throw her out of the class for her to stop.  

With Dowson’s distractions and the lump that was forming in her throat Augusta had barely managed to complete the potion in time. She knew the substance she placed on Snape’s desk was substandard. She just hoped she’d get an acceptable grade at least. She couldn’t afford to fail Potions. She couldn’t afford to fail any of her subjects.

She sat at her desk fiddling with her bag while the other students filed out, waiting until they’d all left before approaching Snape. She’d rather the other students didn’t hear her Head of House chew her out. Especially Dowson, she was sure Dowson would have a field day listening to that.

Snape didn’t look up at first, instead writing something on a piece of parchment whilst half hunched over the table. He rarely sat in the worn chair behind his desk, Augusta often wondered why it was there at all. When he finally acknowledged her it was to give her a scrutinising look. “You do realise the importance of attending your classes on time Miss Rookwood?” He asked icily.

“Yes sir.” Augusta nodded, hoping her tardiness was the only issue he had with her today. Perhaps he’d decided that she wasn’t at fault at all for what happened in the storeroom or the dire condition of her potion. “It won’t happen again sir.”

“Indeed.” Snape sneered, straightening to his full height. “And yet, you have been late to three of my classes this term. Not to mention the reports I’ve been hearing from your other professors.” He picked up the vial of her potion squinting at it distastefully. “Substandard work is being turned in, not only to me but to Professors Quirrel and Flitwick.”

Augusta gulped, she hadn’t thought her work was bad enough for them to mention it to her Head of House. The lessons she shared with Dowson were always the hardest, the girl seemed intent on distracting her no matter how hard Augusta tried to ignore her taunts. What had her professors been saying about her behind her back? She knew she wasn’t exactly the most popular student. Most teachers seemed more likely to side with the outgoing and friendly Dowson rather than the quiet, surly girl with an imprisoned Death Eater for a father.

Only Snape stood up for her, but Snape stood up for all the Slytherins. She was surprised Dowson had started her usual routine of tormenting her during Potions class. Gryffindors weren’t renowned for their intelligence but she would have thought even Dowson would be wary of evoking Snape’s wrath.

She stood rigidly waiting for Snape to continue. Waiting for him to tell her just what her professors had been saying to him. He may be her Head of House but that didn’t mean he was above turning his deriding tone to his Slytherins if he felt they deserved it.

“Well?” Snape asked, gesturing to her with one hand. “Is there a reason for your lacklustre performance?”

“I’m sorry sir, I’ll try harder.” She promised through gritted teeth, her stomach churned as she said those words. She had to try harder, she was set on getting O’s. She wouldn’t let Dowson of all people prevent her success. No number of hexes, jinxes and words could stop her from achieving her ambition.

“Do you still wish to become an Auror?” Snape asked suddenly, not taking his eyes off her for a second.

“Yes sir.”

“Then you understand you will need at least five O’s at Newt level.” Snape stated, folding his arms across his chest. “And yet you are achieving A’s at best. It seems strange to me that a student as diligent as you should suddenly experience such a drop in performance.” Augusta forced herself to meet Snape’s gaze, his eyes glittered dangerously as he fixed her with another one of his scrutinising glares.

Augusta wanted very much to scream and possibly throw something. She inhaled slowly trying to gain control over her emotions even as he gut twisted into knots. She’d be getting those O’s if Dowson and the other Gryffindors would just leave her alone. She remembered the Ravenclaw boy from ealrier, the way he’d looked at her with terror and her anger dissipated slightly only to be replaced with guilt.

They feared her, they all did. Except the Slytherins of course, at least with them they just saw her as just Augusta not some Death Eater to be. Not as the daughter of Augustus Rookwood. Augusta swallows her heart aching as she remembered her father’s name. Even if she dropped her family name she was still connected to him. Even if she changed her name entirely his eyes would still look back at her whenever she saw her reflection. Her stomach churned, she felt sick again.  

“What happened to your head?” The quiet question caught her by surprise almost as much as the sudden change in tone. Her first instinct was to duck her head and cover the glamoured area with her hair but that would only draw more attention to it.

“What do you mean sir?” She asked quickly, feigning confusion. Snape rolled his eyes, drawing his wand. Augusta’s hand instinctively went to draw her own, her heart skipping a beat as she prepared to fight her way out. Snape gave her an odd look as she gripped her wand without pulling it from her pocket. Her skin prickled with adrenaline as she fixed Snape with a challenging glare. He raised an eyebrow, lowering his wand slowly and holding his other hand up in a gesture of peace.

This was Snape, she reminded herself. He was about as far from Dowson and her friends as you could get, there would be no curses from him. Even if he wasn’t a teacher and forbidden to harm his students he wouldn’t dare. Slowly she released her wand and let her hands fall to her sides.

“I can see you have cast a glamour over your forehead Miss Rookwood.” Snape said smoothly. “A glamour I might add that is wearing off and by the looks of it, you haven't merely hidden a spot underneath.”

“It’s nothing sir.” Augusta told him, her brow furrowing as she looked away.

“Then you won’t mind me taking a look.” Snape raised his wand deliberately, not quite pointing towards her. Augusta sighed, slouching in defeat, she shrugged, throwing her hands up in the air to tell him to go ahead. She knew he wouldn’t let this be.

“Finite incatatum.” Snape waved his wand lazily and Augusta felt a tingling of magic as her glamour charm faded. Now Augusta ducked her head, not that it mattered now that he’d seen the graze. She tried to ignore the wave of shame that washed over her that Snape was seeing this. That now he’d think she couldn’t defend herself. Snape was silent for a long moment, Augusta wished he’d break the silence. He watched her with an unreadable look in his eyes.

“I fell sir, that’s all.” She answered his unasked question, it was technically the truth after all even if it wasn’t the whole truth.

“Hm.” Snape grunted, raising his wand casually. “May I?” He asked, it wasn’t really a question. Augusta knew she only had two choices here. Snape or Pomfrey. It was a choice many an injured Slytherin was presented with in their time at Hogwarts. Minor injuries could be healed by Snape with his potions while he’d send students to Madame Pomfrey for anything more serious.  

Augusta preferred hiding minor injuries if she could and only went to Madame Pomfrey if she had to. It was better to go to the Infirmary yourself if you had something to hide. The Matron was much easier to deceive than Snape with his searching looks and seemingly endless questions. But Snape had already seen, and there would be questions regardless of whether she went to see Pomfrey or not. With this in mind she nodded, raising her head and brushing her hair away from the injury so Snape could see it properly.

Snape muttered a diagnostic spell and a light appeared around her head. Moments later it was gone. “You’re lucky. There’s no sign of concussion. I will give you a salve for the wound but it’s shallow, it should heal quickly.”

Augusta didn’t respond instead watching him as he rifled through the drawer in his desk. She caught the sight of a few potions within, a box of pale blue vials that looked like calming draughts, pots of burn salve next to them and what looked like an antidote to uncommon poisons. He pulled out a round tub and handed it to her.

“I expect you’ll want to use that now.” He said brusquely, Augusta nodded, twisting the lid and squinting at the pale green paste within. “Apply generously twice a day until the graze has healed. I suggest mornings and evenings.” Snape advised as she scooped some out with her fingers and smeared it over her head. The pain faded instantly and she sighed in relief.

“Thanks” She grunted in an extremely unladylike way, if her mother could hear her she’d have a fit. She sighed looking anywhere but at Snape. She half hoped he’d let her go now but knew he’d have questions. He always had questions.

“You say you fell. How did that happen?” Augusta nearly laughed but managed to keep it in. Here they were the questions she didn’t want to answer.

“I just fell sir.” She told him, shrugging nonchalantly. She replaced the lid of the salve and shoved it into her robe pocket. “It happens sometimes.”

“I see.” A glance at Snape revealed a displeased expression on his face. “Am I correct to assume you fell on you way to my class?”  

“Yes sir.”

“Were you alone?”

“No sir.” Augusta resolved to keep her answers a short as possible. She didn’t want to talk about what had happened. She was sure Snape could guess if he wanted but she wouldn’t talk about it.

“Who were you with?”

“I don’t know sir.” Augusta sighed irritably, she wondered what it mattered if she was alone or not, she tried to ignore the churning in her gut. “A bunch of people in the corridor.

“Which corridor?”

“The second floor sir.”

“And no one helped you up after falling and hitting your head?” Snape asked his voice carrying an edge to it.

“Why would they?” Augusta snapped, finally turning her fiery gaze to him. Surely Snape of all people would know that no one helped a Slytherin. Let alone the daughter of a Death Eater. She supposed if there had been other Slytherins in the corridor they may have stopped but there hadn’t, not that Augusta had seen anyway. “No one helps a disgusting Death Eater! No one helps someone who’s father’s a murderer!” She screamed, why didn’t he understand that? He was supposed to be the Head of Slytherin he should know this. 

“I wasn’t fast enough. I should’ve known Dowson would be heading the same way. But I wasn’t and she fucking got a leg locker off on me.”

“Language Miss Rookwood.” Snape warned, bringing himself to his full height.

“No fuck you!” Augusta roared, now she’d started it felt extremely good to shout and just let out her frustrations. “You don’t know what it’s like!  Every single fucking day I have to on high alert in case those Gryffindors try anything. All because my father is a piece of shit murderer. He’s rotting in Azkaban and I’m here being tortured because of him.” She could feel her eyes burning but she didn’t care, she let the tears fall freely now. “As soon as I let my guard down this happens!” She waved her hand over her forehead before throwing her hands in the air.

“I’m good at curses. I could beat any one of them in a duel but I don’t. You know why? Because it’s what they’re waiting for. Waiting for Death Eater Rookwood the second to hex one of them into oblivion so they can say they always knew I was a no good Death Eater. So I just sit there and take it. I’m always late because they get me in the corridors, they mess up my work when I finally get to class. Everyone is just waiting for me to snap, to prove to them I’m like my father. Even the Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs look at me like I’m going to do something awful to them. I’ve done nothing to them, I’ve done nothing to warrant them looking at me like that but they know of my father. They think I’m him.”

She should stop now, but Snape hadn’t moved, instead just watching he with an unreadable expression.  “I’m not a Death Eater.” She said firmly, her voice quieter now. Snape raised an eyebrow. “I’m going to become an Auror and I’m going to round up scum like them and put them where they belong.” She continued savagely.

 Snape’s lips twitched. He opened his mouth to speak but Augusta deflated looking away in thought. “I’m not going to be like my dad.” She mumbled, slumping in defeat, she wiped her eyes turning away from Snape sure that her outburst wouldn’t go down well.

She heard a long sigh coming from Snape. “Are you quite done?” He drawled, pressing his lips together as he stared at her with the same unreadable expression. Augusta didn’t respond, instead looking down. “Five points will be taken from Slytherin for foul language and speaking disrespectfully to a professor.” Augusta resisted the urge to roll her eyes, after all she’d said did he really think she cared about points?

“As for what you’ve said.” He summoned a piece of paper and a quill. “I’ll need the names of all involved in harassing you along with the specifics of as many situations you can recall.”

“Sir?” Augusta frowned in confusion.

“You don’t think I will stand by and allow such behaviour. Especially not directed towards one from my own house.” Snape hissed. Augusta shook her head. If he stepped in it would only make things worse.

“It’s fine sir.” Augusta shook her head, she did not want Snape involved. “I deserve it anyway.”

“Why do you say that?” Snape’s voice had an edge to it that made Augusta cringe. She wasn’t so angry any more now only filled with feelings of guilt and shame.

“My dad sir…. He tortured Dowson’s sister.” She muttered, it wasn’t like he didn’t already know. He would have seen the Daily Prophet article that told the world what kind of man her father really was.

“I want you to listen to me very carefully Miss Rookwood.” Snape took a step towards her. She raised her head meeting his eyes cautiously. He had a very serious expression as he unfolded his arms slowly. “Your father’s actions are not your own. You do not owe penance to those your father harmed.” Augusta swallowed, her lips shaking slightly, she lowered her gaze unable to continue looking into Snape’s dark eyes. She felt a solid pressure on her shoulder and looked up to find Snape squeezing her shoulder gently. “You are not your father.”

Augusta nodded slowly as Snape released her. To her shame she felt a few tears escape her eyes. She shook her head wiping them away with her sleeve, how she wished she could stop crying. The brief pressure of her teacher’s hand had been comforting, a thought that only seemed to add to the hollow ache in her chest.

She was momentarily reminded of her childhood. When she had been very small her father would return from work and take her in his arms. Laughing as he called her his little princess and holding her tight while she giggled and hugged him. She forced those memories away, she hated them. Hated how she now knew her father had been returning to her after doing unspeakable things.But the day before her father’s arrest had been the last time she’d experienced such casual comfort, her mother wasn’t exactly the maternal type and was much more interested in raising her to be a proper young lady. 

Snape sighed, turning away from her very slightly. “You are capable of making your own choices. Independent of those your father made.” He told her firmly. “You told me you wish to become an Auror, I know you are more than capable of achieving the required grades, if you put in the effort. I expect you’ll go far in the Auror Office.”

Augusta stared at him, amazed and confused that he believed in her. Her own mother had scoffed when she’d told her of her intentions to join the Aurors. Telling her she’d be better off finding a rich, pure blooded man to marry. But Augusta was determined to succeed. She felt a warmth flooding through her chest that she couldn’t quite explain, she supposed it was nice to know her Head of House, if no one else, believed in her.  

“I’ll put in the effort.” She assured him firmly, standing up straighter. 

“Then I expect to hear only of your improvement from your professors.” He fixed her with a scrutinising glare. “And if you are assaulted any further I expect you to inform me. I will not allow such actions to go unpunished. Do I make myself clear?”

“I… Yes sir.” Augusta wasn’t sure if she would tell him. She didn’t want him getting involved if she could help it. He scowled at her as if he knew what she was thinking and slid the parchment towards her.

“The names and specifics Miss Rookwood. I’ll need them on my desk by this evening.” He told her firmly. “And if you should ever feel the need to talk about this further my door is open. Perhaps this will prevent any further outbursts.” Augusta flushed, grabbing the parchment from the desk.

“Yes sir. I’m sorry.” She mumbled, feeling incredibly foolish for blowing up like that.

“Good, then I suggest you make your way to lunch.” Snape told her nodding to the door. Augusta nodded turning to leave, before exiting through the door she paused turning back towards her Head of House.

“Thank you sir.” She called after him, darting out of the room without giving him a chance to respond. This time she meant it.

((A//N: Thank you to my amazing partner for giving me the idea for this character))

#pro snape #Severus Snape #writing #Snape's Snakes #tw bullying #Original Character

[homenum-revelio-hq]

Welcome (again) to the Order of the Phoenix, Ashley!

You have been accepted for the role of PETER PETTIGREW, with your requested faceclaim change to Nico Mirallegro! We really enjoyed reading your application! We particularly liked how you didn’t go down the route of Peter didn’t have a choice, but instead owned that he did have a choice and made the wrong one. We absolutely agree that he should be included in all things Marauders because he was a Marauder and that’s what made the betrayal so heartbreaking! Can’t wait to see what you bring to this character!

Please take a look at the new member checklist and send in your account within 24 hours! Thank you for joining the fight against Voldemort!

OUT OF CHARACTER:

NAME: Ashley

AGE: 25+

TIMEZONE: EST

ACTIVITY LEVEL: I work part time, but I’m either always on my phone or online after work.

ANYTHING ELSE: N/A

CHARACTER DETAILS:

NAME: Peter Pettigrew

AGE: 21

GENDER, PRONOUNS, and SEXUALITY: CIS Male, He/Him, Confused - Peter has always assumed that he’s a straight man, but that he would never actually be with someone; who would want someone like him? However, that doesn’t mean that both women and men haven’t caught his eye before; he’s just never admitted that to anyone, or even to himself, because that’s not the way to survive. As far as he’s concerned, he’s going to be single the rest of his life, and his sexuality isn’t ever going to matter.

BLOOD STATUS: Half-Blood

HOUSE ALUMNI: Gryffindor

ANY CHANGES: I’d like to use Nico Mirallegro as his FC.

CHARACTER BACKGROUND:

PERSONALITY: 

Self-Reliant; it was something that from practically day one Peter Pettigrew had to try and become, and it was something he hated, something that was so prevalent as a child that it felt like a constant weight on his shoulders; even though that was exactly what had saved him, and what had kept him alive thus far. As a child, it had kept him alive, had kept him away from the bullies, had kept him from going under. Always having to be one step ahead, one thought ahead, planning for the next step and the one after that. If he didn’t rely on himself, then he’d have never made it to Hogwarts. Self-reliance isn’t something that normally comes to mind when one thinks of Peter Pettigrew; and that not being the first thought, that’s exactly how Peter likes it. How can anyone know that he’s one step ahead, when they don’t think he can plan his next meal on his own?

The true hatstall was right; and perhaps Peter would have fit more with Slytherin than Gryffindor. After all, there is a certain amount of cunning that has to go into planning three steps ahead to make sure that you survive, right? However, having met those boys on the train, Peter had felt as if they would be the ones to keep him safe, to help him survive the next series of years at school. He’d already been bullied enough as a child before school, and he didn’t want to end up getting bullied his entire career at Hogwarts too. Sure, his first thoughts about the rest of the Marauders were that they would be the ones to keep him safe; but that didn’t mean his love for them was any less as he got to know them, nor that he didn’t truly want to be friends with them. His desperation to be in Gryffindor with them wasn’t just to survive, but because he felt like he needed to be with his friends; his first true friends that he’d ever had before.

Peter played stupid; it was a choice he made, because if he was stupid and always needing help, no one would want to rely on him or ask him for anything, right? And, he always thought that if it was shown he needed his friends and needed their help, they’d be more likely to stick around. For the first two years at Hogwarts, this game plan worked well; the other students and teachers thought he was stupid and an awful student, but because he hung around with the other Marauders, the other students became much less likely to bother him. His friends kept him safe. They also made him realize that he didn’t have to keep playing stupid around them, not that any of the teachers would ever believe he wasn’t still getting a ton of help, however.

The truth was though, that Peter wasn’t stupid. He wasn’t a squib, he wasn’t a hopeless case, and he wasn’t far below his fellow Marauders. After all, he’d helped in their quest to become Animagi, he’d helped with the creation of the Marauder’s Map, and he’d helped with so many of the pranks that they’d pulled. He wasn’t a genius or anything, but he had proved himself rather useful, at least to his friends, and well; if he had been completely useless, would they really have allowed him to stick around and continued to be friends with him?

However, Peter doesn’t believe that he has anywhere near the courage or bravery that his friends posses, and he’s convinced that the only reason the hat was kind enough to let him be in Gryffindor was because he was terrified to be without his friends. All that the hat told him about inner courage and such, it just seemed like a cop out to him. Peter doesn’t think that he’s brave at all. He’s never stood up to his mother, or to the bullies from his childhood, nor the ones at Hogwarts, and he’d easily participated in bullying Snape. He’s always just kept his head down and gone along with things, because it’s the safer option, because that’s what it takes to survive, and survival is what Peter cares about the most.

Very fearful and almost constantly anxious, Peter can easily be come off as shy and reserved to those that don’t know him super well like the Marauders, and that’s the way he wants it. He can appear almost anti-social or apathetic in situations that don’t directly involve him or his survival. It’s easy for others to think that he’s forgetful or foolish, though he does his best to stay useful. Useful to his friends and the Order so they don’t suspect him and turn on him, and useful to the dark lord so he doesn’t kill him. He’s terrified of both, and so weak-willed and desperate to survive that he can’t come clean to his friends and ask for help.

Eventually even, he’s come to believe that his friends really are above him; he’d already always thought they were braver than him, but they had to be smarter than him, stronger than him, all around just better than he was. He was losing faith in his own abilities, and starting to believe everything that so many others were saying; that he was so far below the other Marauders, that he shouldn’t bother. And if everyone else was saying it about the boys he idolized so much, it had to be the truth then, didn’t it? He loves them, so they have to be better than him.

BRIEF OVERVIEW OF FAMILY:

Thistley Pettigrew was a young witch who grew up in her family home in Scotland. She was the apple of her parents eyes, pampered and treated as if she’d never have to have a care in the world. She went to Hogwarts and was a proud Slytherin, much to the surprise of her Gryffindor and Ravenclaw parents. Still, they loved their daughter more than anything and the three were very close. That was why, when they passed only a few months after she graduated from Hogwarts, it was so completely devastating to Thistley. She spent weeks mourning in the family home, before feeling as if she needed to get out; and so she began to travel and drink, partying as if she were trying to drown out the memories and forget the pain completely.

That was where she met Dalziel. It took awhile before she even learned his last name, not thinking it much important at all. He was a drinking buddy and a friend, an older man by seven years, who let her crash with him and who got her back safe when she’d gotten completely wasted. It went from drinking buddy, to friend, to friends with benefits, and Thistley was sure that she was starting to fall in love with the man. He was just what the pureblood needed, despite him being a muggle. She wanted him to stay with her, needed him to stay with her; he took care of her and made her feel as if her parents were right, that she wouldn’t have to have a care, because she would be taken care of. Who needed work when you had a man ready to provide for you?

It was when she became pregnant that things took a turn. Thistley had never wanted children, but Dalziel’s attention had started to wander towards other girls, girls younger than her age of twenty. She had to get the attention back on her, she had to keep him from leaving her; and so, she’d made sure that they weren’t as careful as they’d always been, and gotten herself pregnant. She was ecstatic, already thinking of them moving back to her family home and raising their child together, feeling as if she’d just won the lottery. But Dalziel… he hadn’t wanted children either, and when she announced that she was pregnant, he’d begun to look for a way out.

It was towards the end of her being seven months along that Dalziel left one night to get them food and he didn’t return. Thistley had fallen asleep, exhausted from the pregnancy, and awoken to find that he still hadn’t come back. She felt like she couldn’t be too concerned; he was having a child with her, he had to come back, didn’t he? But days went by and she didn’t hear from him, couldn’t find him. She didn’t leave the apartment though, desperately hoping that he would come back, and when she went into labor, she was sure that he would be at the hospital with her.

He wasn’t. He didn’t show up at the hospital, and Thistley was devastated. When she was finally ready to go home, she couldn’t go back to the apartment if he wasn’t there, and so she left a note for him, hoping he’d see it if he returned and that he would join her at her family home. She went there with her little boy, her little Peter. She’d named him, and in a fit of angry at Dalziel not being there for them, decided not to use his last name. Instead, she gave him her own last name, vowing that once his father returned, she’d change it for him. He was her darling little boy, her ticket to getting her love back, and Dalziel would return, he had to.

A year went by, and Dalziel never returned. Thistley was never able to find him, and it wore on her. Here she was now, a single mother of a small baby, living in a large building that felt less like a home anymore and more like a prison. It was in need of repair, and she was in need of money. She found a girl who was willing to babysit for her and watch Peter while she worked, and she was more than glad to hand off the small child to someone else. She’d started to resent her child, and she didn’t have time to take care of him or focus on him, not when she had to begin working and getting things back together for her life. She was tired, angry at the world, and upset at the fact that people looked at her as if she were garbage.

The babysitter seemed to care about as much as his mother did. She took care of the boy, of course, making sure he was bathed and fed and was learning to talk and walk as he grew… but it was a job and not her own child. It was at that point, as he began to get old enough to learn and do things on his own, that Peter had to really learn to become self-reliant. His mother was always busy and rarely had time to even speak to her child, and the babysitter had started becoming more interested in sneaking around the home with her boyfriend than actually watching over the child she was supposed to be taking care of. It was only a few years that she was even there, since she rarely got paid and finally had enough.

Peter learned quickly to take care of himself. It weight heavily on the young boy’s shoulders, and he vowed that once he was older… once he was older, he would have help. He wouldn’t have to be so self-sufficient. He’d have people to take care of him and do things for him. He wouldn’t have to worry about being safe, or fearing for his life because he had to go into town on his own; he’d have people that would protect him unlike his mother, and who would make sure he was safe and alive. Survival was his main focus, and it was learning to think two steps ahead and always trying to figure out the next outcome that would become ingrained in his mind.

He’d once tried to ask his mother about his father; because well, what child wouldn’t be interested in the parent that wasn’t there, wanting to know why he wasn’t. Had he died? Left them? It had eaten away at him for so long, and finally he’d asked, but he hadn’t gotten the answer he expected. His mother had brushed him off like it didn’t matter, telling him that she didn’t know the man’s last name, and that it wasn’t important anyway. Peter was so surprised by it, and off put by his mother’s reaction, that he was too scared to ever ask her about it again, despite wanting to desperately find the man.

When it was his turn to go to Hogwarts, his mother was actually very surprised that he’d even gotten his letter; she hadn’t realized that her son had any magical talent, though that was probably because she hadn’t paid much attention to him at all. All Peter wanted was to go and learn enough to keep himself safe and alive. If he could learn enough for that, that was all that mattered. He wasn’t a leader, he didn’t want to go in and run things, he didn’t want to be some superstar… all he wanted was to be accepted by someone, to be included and feel like, for once in his life, he wasn’t completely alone. All he wanted was to survive.

OCCUPATION: Peter is a Potioneer at the Apothecary in Diagon Alley.

ROLE WITHIN THE ORDER/THOUGHTS ABOUT THE ORDER:

Peter never wanted to join the Order. He wasn’t a huge supporter of the cause, he didn’t want to fight… but the others had joined, and who was he to disagree? They weren’t in the dorm anymore, and he was terrified that them being apart would mean they would leave him behind. Losing his friends would have been devastating to him, and so, as with everything else, he followed along without question. But he isn’t convinced that in the end, they’re going to come out on top. He gets it. The others are passionate about the cause, they’re so concerned with what’s right and wrong, and they want to fight for those rights for everyone. They want to save the world, and it doesn’t surprise Peter at all. His friends especially have always had the gumption to do just that, and the belief that they can and will. But he isn’t convinced that it’s going to work, and he’s scared of what the outcome could be. Of course he wants things to turn out right… but he doesn’t want to have to give his life in order to make that happen. He wants to live. He’s not even sure that they’re not all wasting their time with the Order, or if it’s not all going to crumble around them, and very soon. Him betraying them is just loosening the stones in the foundation, and he can’t help but be torn between the thoughts of ‘this was already happening’ and ‘I’m the one that’s bringing it down’.

SURVIVAL:

Peter survives because he’s become a double agent. He’s made himself useful to both sides, and therefore whichever side is winning, that’s the side he’s going to jump ship to. It’s a heartbreaking idea to him, and he can feel the guilt gnawing away at his insides, but he knows it’s what he has to do. He has to be able to survive, and that means doing things he doesn’t want to do. No matter what, he’s going to live; even if that means he has to destroy those he loves in order to do it. He’s useful to the Order by his profession, and the fact that the Marauders are there and he’s one of them. He’s useful to the Dark Lord because he’s an inside man and can pass on things from the Order. He feels like he has protection from both sides, and as long as those two sides don’t figure out what he’s doing… then he’s going to be alright. But having to lie to his friends, and having to be careful around the Dark Lord, it’s taking a toll. He wishes that he had been stronger, that he had been brave or courageous for once in his life… but that wasn’t to be, and now he just has to live with what he’s done.

He’s currently in a very small apartment in London. His mother didn’t want him coming back to the family home, not when she finally had the house to herself again, and so he’d scrounged up enough money to move out, and now has his own little apartment. To him, it’s a blessing, because he can actually rest and relax there. However, he does miss the dorm room so much, and it can get incredibly lonely for him being on his own. It’s warmly decorated, and he’s got so many blankets; on the couch, on his bed, on the chair, almost as if he’s using the blankets to nest in to feel safer.

RELATIONSHIPS:

Peter loves his friends almost more than anything, the only thing he cares about more is, well, himself. Still, the Marauders mean the world to him, and he looks up to them so much. They’ve always been, in his view, the best people in the entire world. They’re smarter than him, stronger than him, braver than him, and all around better; at least he’s convinced himself of this. He still almost doesn’t understand why they’d be friends with someone like him. Still, he loves them. He’s always been close with Remus, admired Sirius, and looked up to James. He could talk for hours about how great they are, and yet, here he is betraying them. He feels guilty and wishes he could just confide in them, that he could just tell them what he’s done and break down and ask for help… but he’s too far in at this point to stop it, and he’s convinced that even if they did find out, they wouldn’t help him; they’d just turn on him for it taking this long for him to do anything. So, that option is off the table, and it breaks his heart. For now, the only way he’s staying above water is lying to them, and that’s going to be how it has to go. It’s the same for the others in the Order. Peter cares for them, he’s watched them fight and struggle to survive, just as he’s doing. But he can’t sacrifice himself to keep them alive. So, as much as he looks up to all of them, and wants to be close and friends with them as well, he can’t help but keep that thought in the back of his head, 'I have to survive first’.

OOC EXPLORATION:

SHIPS/ANTI-SHIPS: Peter/Chemistry is what I ship, although Peter is really not seemingly interested in anything romantic at this point, and may not be; not when there’s a war and his survival has to come first, and not when he’s sure no one will ever want him.

WHAT PRIVILEGES AND BIASES DOES YOUR CHARACTER HAVE?

Being that his mother is a pureblood and that he, and most others, don’t know who his father is, Peter gets away with being a half-blood that thinks his father was also a wizard, not a muggle. His mother has basically insisted that his father was also a wizard, though only a half-blood, so that Peter wouldn’t have the 'stain’ of having a muggle for a father. Listening to his mother, Peter didn’t have the best opinion of muggles growing up. However, meeting muggleborns like Lily and stepping further out into the world instead of his family home, Peter’s eyes opened up more and he’s much more accepting than he was before. Yes, he still has the occasional slip-ups where he says something biased or rude, but he’s still learning. The hardest thing for him now is the fact that he’s around the Death Eaters that talk so badly about muggles and muggleborns, and it’s hard for him sometimes to remember to keep those thoughts out of his head except when he’s with them. After all, he doesn’t want to slip up in front of Lily when he adores her so much, and he doesn’t want her to hate him.

It’s hard for him to keep both worlds separate sometimes, going between the open minded thoughts of the real him, being with the order and his friends (i.e. being completely fine with werewolves, because obviously he became an Animagi to help Remus and stay with him during a full moon, being okay with muggles because of being around them and such, etc.) but also, going back to the close-minded feelings he has to get in his head with the Death Eaters. Having to hate muggles and muggleborns, having to dislike werewolves, having to think purebloods are better than everyone else. Those thoughts burrow deep, and it’s hard to shake them. Still, as a white, CIS man, Peter seems like he can get away with a little bit more; that and the fact that he’s learned to just keep his mouth shut and not say anything at all, well, that makes more sense.

WHAT ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO?

Peter has never been my favorite Marauder, by far. However, I’ve always had a soft spot for him, especially after the way he’s always treated in the fandom. Yes, he was awful in his later years and there’s no denying that. However, he was still a Marauder. He still was their friend. He still was one of them, no matter how much anyone wants to try and erase it or leave him out of all the edits and stories, etc, that they make. So really, I’m just mostly looking forward to getting to play him. Getting to show that there’s more to Peter Pettigrew than just the “evil man who turned on the people who cared for him”, and getting to play out the fact that he’s torn between two worlds and that he’s just desperately trying to survive, and so misguided that he thinks the only way to survive is to step on those he loves. I’m looking forward to playing out all the different sides of him, and to show that he’s such a complex character, and that maybe if he’d just been treated differently, or things had been handled different, it wouldn’t have turned out the way it did for him or anyone else.

#homenumaccepted #harry potter rp #hp rp #marauders rp #marauders era rp

[cursed-ice-spirits]

Rebecca’s First Year: Chapter 7

Chapter 7: The Talk of the Cursed

Prev: Chapter 6

First: Chapter 1

Next: Chapter 8

“Expelliarmus!” 

The red spell hit Merula and her wand flung out of her hand, flipping to rebound the spell back at her. As she was knocked back, Rebecca reached out and snatched Merula’s wand from the air.

Merula gaped. “How’d you learn that spell already? No fair!”

“Wow!” She heard Rowan’s voice spoke up from the crowd. “That was amazing, Rebecca!”

“You know, you need to stop getting hit by your own spells,” Rebecca remarked lazily as she stared down at Merula. “Maybe you’ll win next time.”

Merula’s eyes lit with anger. “You can’t be better than me! No one can be better than me!”

“And yet, I’ve won,” Rebecca shot back, her face not twitching. “Now I think it’s best that you apologize to Ben Copper.”

“I'll never apologize to you losers and Mudbloods!” She scowls. As she continues her tirade, Rebecca’s eyes drift over her head, her eyes widening when she saw Professor Snape approaching from behind. “I'm Merula Snyde! Fourth-generation Slytherin! The greatest witch at Hogwarts! I do what I want when I want! I run this school! I—"

Snape cleared his throat and that’s all that’s needed for Merula to freeze, her voice catching in her throat. She turns around, face to face with his irritated expression. “Professor Snape!”

Snape’s eyes go right over Merula, narrowing when they landed on Rebecca. “I suspect this is your fault, Lord. Are you aware of Hogwarts’s policy on unauthorized dueling?”

Rebecca’s eye twitched but was rescued from shooting back a retort that will get house points taken away faster than she can curse by Professor Flitwick.

“Did you cast the first spell in this duel, Miss Lord?” He asks as he appears beside Snape. 

Rebecca frowned. “I didn't, no, but I punched her for calling Ben Copper that word.”

“Doing violence?” Snape said, a cruel smile tugging at his lips. “I see… Well, maybe a few weeks detention will—”

“Severus,” Flitwick’s voice cuts sharply in the air. “Miss Lord only has done it to defend herself and her friends. She has done it before. Detention is not needed. As long as she doesn’t do it again, which I trust she won’t. Isn’t that right, Miss Lord?” He directs the question to her. 

“Yes Professor,” Rebecca said, looking straight at Snape. She kept her face blank but her eyes told another story. 

He sneered at her. “And I wonder where she learned the Disarming Charm, Filius.”

“Oh yes,” Rebecca said, “How scandalous that I learned the Disarming Charm before everyone else. It’s not like there’s something called extra studying.”

“She is one of my most skillful first-year students, Severus,” Flitwick said hurriedly before Snape can throw away the rule of ‘no killing students’ and murder her anyway. Although with how much he’s glaring at her, if eyes could kill, she’ll be six feet under. “It wouldn't surprise me if she had learned such spell all by herself.”

Snape clenched his jaw, looking displeased. “Regardless, it is against the rules to duel on the school grounds. Clean yourself up and meet me in the West Towers after dinner to face the consequences of your actions, Lord.”

Rebecca let out a sigh as Snape and Flitwick walked away, the crowd dissolving. Not surprised... Not surprised at all. She goes to leave herself when she feels a hand on her shoulder and turns around, her brows furrowing. 

“Ben?”

He doesn’t look at her, hand still on her shoulder, but he murmured, “I’m sorry you got in trouble because of me.”

A ball of unease forms in her stomach, even though Ben meant no harm, she’s still jumpy when it comes to physical contact that is not given by her, so she places a hand on his and slowly pushes it off, giving him a simple smile. “It wasn’t your fault, I knew what I was getting into and Snape can never be unbiased. Besides, it was definitely worth it to deck Snyde.”

This time, he laughs as Rowan pushes herself between them and links her arms with theirs, smiling at both of them.

“Come on, we’ll be late for class.”

—————

The stares don’t bother her anymore, even as she attends the next two classes before dinner. At least the attention was of her own accord and not because of her brother. 

One thing amusing about it was Snape coming into her Herbology class with Professor Sprout and getting a fucking plant thrown at him.

“You don’t get to say a mean word about my Puffs on my watch!” Sprout had shouted as Snape high-tailed out of there.

Marvelous.

It was enough to keep a smile on her face as she walked to dinner. Not even Lockwood can ruin her mood (“You look weird smiling. Stop that.” “Thanks, you do as well.”). 

Sadly it didn’t last long. Not with Snape.

Finishing dinner early, she started walking to the West Towers. She has to prepare herself for the unfair treatment she’s surely going to get, otherwise, she punches Snape as well and that will get her in trouble. Honestly, how that man is a teacher, she has no—

“Hello, Rebecca Lord.”

Rebecca jumped and turned around, hand jumping to her wand as she finds herself face to face with Penny Haywood. 

She hates the way her brain immediately jumps to ‘Pretty girl.’ It reminds her every single time that she is very very not straight. 

Blinking, she blurts out the first thing that came to mind, “Ah, so you are aware of me other than gossip and being your dorm mate.”

Wait, fuck that was not what I meant to say. That sounded rude. 

Luckily for her, Penny just giggled. “Does that surprise you?”

“Obviously,” Rebecca said, shrugging one shoulder. “You are Penny Haywood, the most popular girl in our year, and in case you were blind, the reputation that precedes me is… ”

Penny shook her head. “I disagree, Rebecca. Everyone is talking about the hero who was brave enough to stand up to the tyranny of Merula Snyde. Not to mention all the rumors surrounding your brother...”

Rebecca freezes. 

Hero. 

“Do something!! Please, Bex, please please please!!”

“I-I can’t!! I don’t know how!!”

“BEX!!”

“I’M SORRY!!”

It feels as though she was underwater, Penny’s voice muffled and distorted as she continues. “I wanted to say thank you. Hogwarts is supposed to be fun, but Merula was making it miserable for everyone. I especially appreciate how you immediately stepped in between Merula and Ben Copper and used your wits to stop her bullying.”

“I punched her in the face,” she finds herself saying.

Penny laughed. It sounded like bells— pay attention you fool. “Nobody said violence doesn’t do wonders.”

Rebecca shifted uncomfortably. She’s no hero. “Honestly, it’s what anyone would do.”

“I agree, but only you were brave enough and you were the one who did.” Penny smiled. God, she’s so pretty. Why is she so pretty? “I hope Professor Snape doesn’t punish you for your bravery and for doing what’s right.”

Penny bounced back on her heels, her smile widening. “Let me know if I can ever help you with anything, Rebecca. I know the gossip around Hogwarts, and I’m pretty good with potions if I say so myself.”

Rebecca smiled at the offer and went to reply but it fell as quickly as it came. The way Penny looked at her with admiration and awe, like she’s some sort of hero… it just rubs her wrong. 

She’s no hero. She’s far from it. Why is she looking at her like she is?

“I’ll… I’ll think about it,” her voice sounded strained, and it was obvious with the way Penny’s face immediately falls into a look of concern. 

“Is everything alright, Rebecca?”

Penny is a nice girl but she doesn’t deserve to be dragged into the roller coaster that is her life. None of them should. 

“Everything is fine,” she forces in a smile. “It’s just…” Rebecca shakes her head and shoulders her bag. “You shouldn’t rely on me, Penny Haywood. I’m no hero. I faced Snyde for my own selfish gain.”

She turns around again so Penny won’t see the look on her face. “It’s best if you stay away from me so you won’t get caught up in the roller coaster that is my life.”

Her voice sounds bitter as she walks away.

—————

Penny stares after the fellow Hufflepuff, blinking after the conversation that took place. 

That… was weird. Was… was she always like this or had Penny always overlooked her because of her loner status?

Penny knew she was a loner and preferred that, but she didn’t know Rebecca could sound this bitter… this sad. 

“Did I do something wrong?” She wonders out loud.

—————

She feels bad for turning down Penny when all she wanted was to be friends but when you consider that her ice can cover the entire school if she doesn’t restrain it with an iron fist, it’s necessary. 

Snape and Merula were at the meeting spot by the time she arrived. Rebecca felt surprised that Merula was there since she was positive the Slytherin would just get a slap on the wrist. That vanishes quickly though when she sees the look on Snape’s face.

Sighing, she readies herself and straightened her shoulders. 

“Now that Miss Lord,” he sneers when he says her name, “is here, I can discuss your punishment. Expulsion seems to be the most logical option.”

Rebecca’s face stays passive but Merula’s eyes grew wide. “I had nothing to do with it, Professor! I only defended myself when this loser attacked me!”

He frowns. “While Miss Lord indeed punched you, you have every right and maturity to walk away. However, you didn’t. Everyone saw you cast the first spell, Miss Snyde. This, however, does not excuse Lord’s behavior.”

He turns to her, black eyes boring into her eyes. “Since you arrived, you caused nothing but trouble, made a mess of my classroom, and dueled on school grounds. This, after the damage your brother did to Hogwarts. Why shouldn’t you receive the harsh punishment for your actions, Lord?”

She feels a hard prod at her shields and she freezes, then her eyes turned to steel. “I stopped Snyde from bullying me and a few others that I find myself growing a fondness for.” Which you shouldn’t, her traitorous brain tells her. “I didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Attacking a student with your wand is against school rules—” he begins but was interrupted seconds later.

“Using Legilimency on minors not just against school rules but also illegal, but that doesn’t stop you.”

The air seems to freeze from Snape’s anger. Not even Merula speaks a word, as she seems to be intimidated by how angry he is. His eyes seem to blaze, and she averts her eyes to his chin before he can prod at her shields again. She may be an Occlumens but she’s not risking it. 

“40 points,” he says through gritted teeth, “from Hufflepuff.”

Her face doesn’t twitch.

“As I was saying before I was… interrupted,” he sends her a glare, “Expulsion is the logical punishment for dueling on school grounds. Unfortunately, our Headmaster is illogical, and believes that expulsion is unfair in this case. If either of you is caught are ever caught dueling on school grounds again, I can assure you that you will not be so lucky.”

He doesn’t even look at Merula. Typical. 

Before she can open her mouth and get herself into even more trouble, a voice speaks up. 

“Professor Snape!”

Filch comes rushing over and she shuts up, eyes analyzing as she tries to figure out why he’s here.

She doesn’t have to wait for long. 

“What is it, Mr. Filch?” Snape asked, turning his eyes away from her.

"Professor Snape, you must come with me right away. It’s about…” Filch glances at her and Merula, before lowering his voice (not that it worked, her ears are sharper from long nights of sneaking down to the kitchens in her home, listening for any noise as she steals some food) into a whisper, “The Vaults.”

Surprise explodes inside of her, but she forces herself to keep a straight face. Merula is looking at her, then at Filch, confused. She hasn’t heard and she’s going to keep it that way. 

Snape tenses and looks sharply at the two girls. “Return to your Common Rooms,” he said sharply, before rushing after Filch.

Rebecca’s sharp eyes followed them, before the rest of her body does the same. They must be talking about the Cursed Vaults.

She keeps a safe distance between her and the two men. Better off not getting caught. Jane will swoop in on her and snap at her for losing more points, not that she cared but she didn’t want another earful because she was spotted and lost even more points. 

Seeing them beside a door with ice surrounding it, Rebecca frowns and slips behind a pillar, tuning out all noise except their soft voices murmuring in the corridor.

“Who else knows about this?” Snape asked

“Only me and Mrs. Norris saw the ice, sir,” Filch responded, said cat in his arms. “I was going to report the incident to the Headmaster.”

“I will inform the Headmaster,” Snape corrects, his voice sharp. “This may have something to do with the Lord situation.”

Ice seems to drop into her stomach. 

“Is it true that the vaults are filled with gold and powerful prophecies and artefacts from before Hogwarts existed? And that’s why the Lord boy lost his mind trying to find them? He was in your house, was he not?”

Snape looked away. “Gold and powerful prophecies and nonsense like that were not the reason why he went after the Vaults. He kept claiming he can save his sister, whatever that meant. Quite unfortunately, his sister seems to be in perfect health. That’s all I know.” He shakes his head and looks at Filch. “Don’t worry about what’s inside the vaults. Worry about keeping everyone out. Look this door, and keep it guarded,” he ordered.

Rebecca presses herself against the wall and waits until the two men left before quickly leaving the area. 

Snape doesn’t know why Jacob wanted to save her but she does. She figured it out shortly before he got himself expelled.

It was because of her-

Something slammed into the center of her temple. She gasped and slammed a hand on the wall, panting heavily as her vision clouded with fog. 

How? What’s going on? Why is this happening? Why can’t she see—she can’t see she can’t see she can’t s—

A walking suit of armor, a staircase shrouded in mist, and ice — was it her ice? She can’t tell, she can never tell — encasing Hogwarts, spreading faster and faster.

The ice is here. A voice shrieks in her mind. The vault will open.

She blinked and just as quickly as it came, it disappeared. She was in the corridors again, breathing slowly, her hand still on the wall beside her. 

What was that?

It was if… something, or someone, was pushing against her—

Rebecca’s face drained of color and she looked around, checking if anyone was near her. Nobody was here.

She has some time. Wouldn’t hurt to check… right?

Slowly, she exhaled as she leaned against the wall and slid down, her legs under her. Hands on her knees, she bowed her head, slowing her breathing. 

In. Out. In. Out. 

It wasn’t the first time she’s done this. Soon, all sounds and smells disappeared from around her, and she’s pulled into her mindscape. 

She taps the tip of her toe on the ground and feels grass. Even as a girl raised in a Manor, Rebecca was always the happiest outside. Therefore, her mindscape is a forest. 

In the center of her mind was a fortress but she’s not there to look around. 

Just to take a look. She told herself as she rushed towards the forest edge. Not too long. Just a look. 

The walls surrounded the entire forest. It was covered in head to toe with vines and ivy, but it didn’t make it any less strong. She sped up, seeing something on the walls, only slowing down to a stop when she saw a hole hovering right above her head, with the stone bricks laying beneath it.

Bingo.

Too small for one of them to slip in but big enough for a Legilimens to get in and give her a vision. 

Rebecca frowned and brushed a hand over the hole, watching as the stone floated up and rebuilt itself until the hole was completely covered. 

She knows that spot. Jacob used to practice Legilimency on her after finding out he was a natural-born Legilimens, since their father was always busy with work, and he hits that same spot as the hole every single time without fail.

She is not a Seer. She knows that for certain. None of her ancestors are Seers so there’s no way it’s a Vision. It has to be something other than that. 

Is this a sign? Of her brother reaching out? To her? 

If so, she didn’t know her brother got skilled enough to…

Rebecca smacked herself. She is not here to debate about how she got that Vision. She’s just here to check and see what’s wrong.

She’ll…

She’ll find out more later.

Letting out a deep sigh, Rebecca closed her eyes again, and slowly, she pulled herself out of her mindscape, finding herself in the corridors again, right where she was last sitting. 

She jerked her head to one side, then tilted it to the other, hearing loud cracks, and rubbed her neck, before getting up, paling even more when she saw what was on her arms and legs. She was too focused on finding out what’s wrong to check but now…

Covering her arms and legs was frost, some starting to form into ice already. She let out a string of curses and checked her control, feeling dismayed when it had weakened when she was distracted by the vision. 

Placing a hand on the top of her shoulder, she brushes roughly at the frost, gritting her teeth at the stinging pains that attacked her chest immediately. It shouldn’t hurt this much but it does and she hates it. She continues to brush at it, until it was all gone and her arm was red and throbbing. 

Get it off get it off get it off—

Moving onto her other arm and legs, she refuses to let another sound to escape her mouth while she slaps away the frost and ice, even with every stabbing pain in her chest, every red patch of skin uncovered when she brushes the frost off her skin. When she’s done, Rebecca pokes distastefully at the red skin, noticing interestedly that her hands were shaking, and lets out a sigh. 

She hates this curse but she doesn’t have a choice other than to grin and bear it. Letting out a low bitter laugh, she feels a stabbing pain in her chest, pricking like needles, and she grabs at it and leans against the wall, her mask slipping off to reveal her greatest pain and despair. 

This incident only reminds her of her limited time. How much time does she have? 20 years? Maybe a few years more? What a damn joke. 

It’s not fair, she has so many things she wanted to do when she graduates. Be a dragonologist, travel the world, discover things, new and old, and so many others but she doesn’t know if she has enough time. Nobody in her family knows. It isn’t fair. 

Why did the curse decide to throw away all protocols and go to her instead?

Why did Jacob have to be so firm on believing that he can break her curse that he went mad from trying to find the Vaults?

Why—

“Oi! Rebecca!” A voice called out and she snapped on her mask again as she turned around. It was Bill Weasley. 

She blinks. “Bill, what is it?”

“Just wanna check up on you,” he said, ruffling her hair and making her freeze up. “You okay? You looked spooked earlier.”

Shit, he noticed. Rebecca looked up and saw his eyes. While the rest of him was relaxed and calm, she saw worry and concern swirling in his brown eyes. 

She forced a smile on her face and attempted to distract him with a joke. “Well when you have to face Snape and see how much he looks like a vampire, you’ll be spooked too.”

It didn’t work. He looked skeptical. “If you say so. Can I walk you back to your Common Room?”

She squinted at him. “Why? I thought students aren’t allowed in common rooms other than their own.”

“Samuel is coming this way.”

“Fuck the rules. Let’s go.”

He laughed this time and ruffled her hair again. “So I heard you dueled Merula and decked her. Nice.”

“I lost 20 points for that,” Rebecca declared as they walked. “Still no regrets.”

Even as they walked, talking about nothing in particular, Rebecca couldn’t help the sickening feeling in her stomach.

She’s cursed, she shouldn’t be hanging around them. She’ll get attached and then she’ll hurt them by leaving eventually or getting hurt herself when they stab her in the back and leave her to die. She has to distance herself eventually. That way, no one will get hurt. 

But… if her ancestors can fall in love and have friends then so can she.

She has time to watch them grow, watch them get married, and be successful before she has to perish long before any of them will.

#LONG SKDFSDFSDF #3921 words sdfsdfdfgfggb #hogwarts mystery #hphm #rebecca lord #hphm mc #jacob's sibling #hphm fanfic #hphm fanfiction #first year #year 1 #ben copper #rowan khanna #merula snyde #severus snape #filius flitwick #penny haywood #argus filch #bill weasley #i really did misspelled merula's name several times skfsdfsdfdgf #i was that tired #it's like 4:45AM right now i need sleep

[snapedefender]

I try defending Snape all the time, but one of my friends always says, "But James changed for Lily and Snape didn't so he's a better person." She also thinks that because Snape called Lily a mudblood everything the maruders did was fine because Snape was worse. Can you please help find some good counter-arguements for this? Thank you so much!

all right, i’ll do my best

a) “but james changed for lily” - did he? he continued to bully snape. behind lily’s back, according to remus and sirius. so did he really change or did he just get smarter about hiding his shitty actions from the girl he wanted to impress? also we see nothing of james’ life beyond his fifth year and we know very little about the adult he became, so it’s impossible to say that he “changed” in a significant way. judging it based on lily choosing to marry him doesn’t work, bc we have evidence that james hid stuff from her. so your friend is already working on a fault premise. 

b) “and snape didn’t, so [james] is a better person” - okay, no snape didn’t change. we could discuss how trapped he was in his choices, how little actual options he had, how lily accuses him of things we don’t know he’s actually feeling or doing. but instead, let’s discuss the idea of morality based on “changing” for someone else. does changing for lily (once again, presuming he did) make james a better person? that’s assuming that lily is somehow a moral compass or some beacon of purity and truth instead of a woman with her own faults and weaknesses. (why is lily the yardstick against which both james and snape’s”goodness” is measured?) also, the fact that snape DOES change bc of lily... the fact that that’s literally HIS ENTIRE STORY ARC. he gives up everything for her safety (not her love, not her posession... her SAFETY). he literally risks his life to make sure she’s safe and gives up everything, changes sides when it’s fucking dangerous to do so, and spends twenty years fighting against evil to honor her memory. if that’s not changing, i don’t know what is. (and we have literal, tangible proof of his change... unlike james, whose change we only hear about in some throw-away hearsay stories from his biased best buds)

c) the marauders bullied snape before he ever said mudblood to lily. he wasn’t worse at 11 when they were all just kids & james and sirius picked on him for kicks. during swm, sirius is just bored and james just wants to have fun when they tie snape up and treat him like shit. nothing snape does justifies how the marauders treat him and anyone who says so justifies bullying. 

c.5) once again, harry potter IS a moral compass, harry potter is one of the most good and morally righteous characters in the series. and he sees the entire scene - sees snape call his mother a mudblood - and his sympathies still lie with snape, enough that he risks his own safety to demand answers out of two men he looks up to as father figures. so if you don’t believe me about it, believe harry j potter who doesn’t see any justification in that situation despite witnessing the exact moment that’s used to justify it. 

d) pretending that james is some sort of Moral Good vs snape’s Evil Bad is a disservice to both characters. james is more complicated and complex and human bc we see that he is petty and vain and cruel. trying to sweep that under the rug with justifications for his meanness isn’t a help to his character or a defense of it. 

hope that helps?

#snape and james #Anonymous

[theinkquiry]

Just The Two

Pairing: Neville X Reader

Prompt: You and Neville have been best friends for as long as you could remember, but he's been acting distant lately. You're determined to get to the bottom of this, especially since you've been falling for him ever since the year started.

Warnings: None

A/N: Haven't written anything in a while, sorry! Finals have taken over and destroyed my life. Nevertheless, enjoy!

It was hard to think of a time when you and Neville weren't together. Your grandparents knew each other well, and Neville's granny made sure that he always found a friend in you. You never minded, not being one to be sociable all the time either. You found great satisfaction in knowing that you would always have one another's backs. During your very first moments at Hogwarts, you were elated to witness Neville being sorted into the same house as you. When his grandmother found out, she couldn't believe it either. Timid Neville was a Gryffindor!

Unfortunately, a lot of teasing came with that title. "Don't listen to them, Neville. I think you're really brave." You often had these chats, especially if he was feeling particularly unconfident.

"I messed everything up, again. It was my fault I lost the bloody list of passwords. I let a criminal in!" Neville buried his head in his hands.

You frowned and leaned down closer to him. "You're brave for facing your fears every day, Neville."

Over the years, you shared lots of things with Neville. Secrets, fears, hopes, and hugs. It wasn't until recently that conveying these emotions became troubling. Case in point, the incident last week.

"What's wrong?" You asked. Neville was poking at his food, not looking up to talk to anyone. Not even you.

"Hm?" He finally looked up into your eyes, only to blink twice and put his head back down. "Just tired I suppose."

"Was it because of class?" You guessed.

"No. I'm fine, Y/N." He lied. You hid a pained expression but tried to coax the truth out one last time.

"Did..did I do anything?" This certainly caught his attention. He looked up in shock and stumbled over his words.

"Wha- of course you didn't. I-I didn't mean to make you think- I just-"

You placed your hand on his shoulder, shutting him up in a snap. You felt him tense up. What happened? He wasn't ever like this with you before. You hesitantly withdrew your hand, deciding to instead play with your fingers.

"I'm not offended, Neville. I just want to make sure you're okay. You know you can tell me if anyone else is bothering you, I'm not afraid to hex them again." You flash a mischievous smile.

All he did was gulp and nod his head. "I guess the homework has been getting to me lately."

"I can help you if you want-"

"No!" It came out louder than either of you expected. He immediately slapped a hand over his mouth, in shock of his own forwardness. "I-I didn't mean to yell at you, I'm sorry!"

It hurt to see him act so unreachable, but pushing further only seemed to make things worse. "Well...alright then. I won't ask any more questions. I'm here if you need me." You turned to continue eating, trying not to show your disappointment inside. Why was he acting this way? Your mind tumbled and shook with theories. Was it someone else? A bully? Snape? You? Just thinking of the last option made the color drain from your face. You dared to sneak a glance at Neville.

He turned away at the last second. Were you hallucinating, or was he just staring at you before? You bit the inside of your cheek and went back to eating. Just thinking about Neville in a romantic way made your face heat up faster than ice in a boiling cup of tea. You've noticed him growing more since his last birthday. Not just taller, but better built as well. You gulped and tried to erase any strange thoughts from your head.

Glancing over one more time, your heart sunk at his depressed temperament. "Give him time, and he'll go to you when he's ready," a voice reasoned in your mind. A week. You'll wait a week and see if he needs any more help then.

As the days crawled by, you were getting uneasier. It was like you shared Neville's nerves and discomfort like everything else. He started talking to Harry and Ron more than you. "Do you want to meet up after class by the library to study?" You would ask. All you got in response was a shake of the head. "Sorry, I-I think Dean wanted my help with something. Y-y'know. Guy stuff."

You didn't, in fact, know about the guy stuff. Since when did Neville ever start doing 'guy stuff'? You sat in front of the fireplace that evening, just staring at the flickering embers. You had no plans since Neville rain-checked for the third time this week.

"If you're trying to count how many sparks fly out at a time, don't bother." Ginny sat next to you. "Fred and George dared Ron to try one time and his hair almost caught on fire."

You laughed at the ridiculousness. "Don't worry, I wouldn't take a gander like that anyway."

"Well, you seemed really...bored. Isn't Neville usually with you at this hour?"

"Usually," you sigh. "He's been...I don't know..."

Ginny sat up straighter on the couch. "Did something happen?"

You pondered that question. "Yes? No? I have no clue. I-it feels like he doesn't even want to be around me anymore. I'm thinking 'is he upset with me?' 'is he in trouble?' I don't even know how to approach him anymore."You didn't notice the few tears slipping out until Ginny was patting your back and offering you a tissue.

"That is very strange. You guys stick together like Dean and Seamus." Ginny rubbed her chin and thought hard. "Say, this might sound strange but.."

"What is it?" If it lead to answers, you had to know.

"Does he avoid you in any particular way?" Ginny finished.

You tilted your head in confusion. "What ways are there to ignore a person?"

"Well, is he cold towards you? Or more nervous? Stuttering? Red face? Any of that sound familiar?" Ginny asked. You weren't sure what game she was playing, but you couldn't stop. Like a box of Bertie Bott's, you knew you were going to finish the box whether you ended up with sweet or gross flavors.

"I suppose he does stutter a lot. But when doesn't he?"

"When he's with you, normally," Ginny muttered under her breath. You didn't hear her, too lost in your own train of thought.

"He's been avoiding eye contact too. Oh, I hope I didn't scare him in any way-"

Ginny stood up abruptly. Caught off guard, your back hit the couch. "Where are you go-"

"Don't fret about it, Y/N. I have a feeling you and Neville are going to be just fine." Ginny stated it like she could tell your entire futures.

"Are you sure? I appreciate you helping-"

"No problem, Y/N. How about...you meet me tomorrow in the courtyard? I need your help with something."

"I suppose I'm available. What does this have to do with-"

"Thanks, Y/N. Four'o'clock!" Ginny didn't let you finish your sentence. As quickly as she approached, she vanished up the stairs.

You felt very confused and very exhausted. Maybe if you just sleep it off for one more night, you could get your mind less muddled. It was hard, with you tossing and turning every few minutes. It was impossible to get comfortable, and even less so to achieve peace of mind. You couldn't help having the fear that perhaps Neville was outgrowing you.

At precisely four the following evening, you sat on a stone bench in the courtyard. Students were slowly filtering out, and the sun was low in the sky. There was a warm orange-yellow glow all around you. Despite the inviting ambiance, you were still conflicted about your feelings. And you certainly did not stop worrying about Neville. You took a deep breath, and slowly let it out. You are here because Ginny asked you to be, and you were going to wait for her and be a supportive friend. You wondered what the girl had up the sleeves of her robes. It was a few minutes past, and she was nowhere to be found.

The crunching of leaves caught your attention. Assuming the sounds to be from Ginny, you were shocked to see Neville instead. A smile immediately found its way up to your face, but it disappeared as soon as his eyes cast away from yours. Your shoulders slumped. He was avoiding eye contact again.

"H-hey, Neville." You scoot over. "What brings you here?"

"I could ask you the same thing," he shrugs. Taking a seat beside you, a familiar uncomfortable silence quickly settles around you.

"Did I do something?" You ask, voice barely above a murmur. You looked down at the ground, biting your lip.

"Did you- what?" Neville looked at you now, concern glazing over his eyes.

"I just felt like..we haven't talked in days. So, did I do something?" You repeat yourself.

"No, no! Of course you didn't, you're my best friend," Neville reassured you. "I've just been...busy."

You didn't even feel the tears starting to gather up in your eyes. It took all the strength you had not to let it out. "You're lying." You try to remain calm, but your voice cracked at the end. You cast your eyes down, staring intently at your hands. You wouldn't cry. You would not cry.

For such a brave Gryffindor, you crumbled so easily when it came to him. All it took was his arms to wrap around you and your emotions were released like birds from a cage. You didn't know how long you spent sobbing into his sweater-vest. It was itchy, pathetic, and even a bit gross, but at least he was there this time.

"I'm so sorry, Y/N. I'm so so sorry." Neville rubbed soothing patterns on your back. It was how you used to calm him whenever he had nightmares as a kid. Him repaying the favor only made you cry harder. "I did this. I pulled away from you because I was so afraid of what I might do that I ended up hurting you even more."

You sniffled. Pulling away and wiping at the tears furiously. "Meaning?" You beckoned for him to continue. You already felt better now that he was actually talking to you.

"You know you've always been my best friend. You're always there for me. You're kind, y-you're sweet. You never let anyone get away with making me feel less than valuable," Neville began.

"That's because you are valuable. To me and everyone else."

"A-and that's what I mean!" He laughed dryly. "You always know what to do and say. I would have been lost without you, or worse. I could never thank you enough for everything you've done for me. You made me less afraid, but I've been more afraid than ever these past few days. I'm a coward."

He lowered his head.

You felt your heart leap at a million kilometers an hour. "No, Neville. You're not. Why are you afraid? I promise I can make it go away." You cup your hands around his face. He looked you in the eye with so much raw emotion and fear and gratitude all mixed into a galaxy all on its own.

Then you felt something else. Looking at him only drew you in further. Closer and deeper until space was eliminated. In short, you finally had the guts to kiss Neville Longbottom with all your heart. It was soft, and Neville was still very shy, but it was just what you always wanted.

Neville pulled away abruptly, in shock at what he's done. He was about to start apologizing, face red as his Gryffindor scarf, but you shut him up with another kiss.

"Is this what you were so afraid of?" You take a guess.

He nods and wraps you up in his arms. You felt like you could stay there forever. "Not anymore."

#Neville Longbottom #neville longbottom imagine #neville longbottom oneshot #Harry Potter #Harry Potter Imagine #Harry Potter Imagines #Harry Potter Oneshot #Harry Potter Oneshots

[lov3nerdstuff]

Voluptas Noctis Aeternae {Part 7.4}

*Severus Snape x OC*

Summary: It is the year 1983 when the ordinary life of Robin Mitchell takes a drastic turn: she is accepted into Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Despite the struggles of being a muggle-born in Slytherin, she soon discovers her passion for Potions, and even manages the impossible: gaining the favor of Severus Snape. Throughout the years, Robin finds that the not quite so ordinary Potions Professor goes from being a brooding stranger to being more than she had ever deemed possible. An ally, a mentor, a friend... and eventually, the person she loves the most. Through adventure, prophecies and the little struggles of daily life in a castle full of mysteries, Robin chooses a path for herself, an unlikely friendship blossoms into something more, and two people abandoned by the world can finally find a home.

General warnings: professor x student, blood, violence, trauma, neglectful families, bullying, cursing

Words: 1.2k

Read Part 1.1 here! All Parts can be found on the Masterlist!

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A glimpse into the third week of travels (the second week of July):

"Are you absolutely certain that it is necessary to roam around here in complete darkness?" Snape asked for the third time already, his voice sounding even louder to Robin's ears as it echoed through the quiet forest around them. "Is one single lumos too much to ask for?"

"Yes!" Robin sighed for the third time as well, feeling like he didn't even want to understand her on this. "We will scare it away if we carry any light on us."

"But. I. Can't. See." He grumbled after almost tripping over another root that broke through the soil without any uneven spots as a warning.

"Well, I can!" Robin whispered and rolled her eyes to herself, but stopped in her track and turned around to him nonetheless. She didn't want him to get hurt, nor to get lost. And it really was a bit unfair that she had been drinking that potion to see better in the dark while he hadn't. "Just… wait here if you dread walking around so much, and I will come and get you when I find the stupid creature."

"Absolutely not! I'm not leaving you, and that is not up for debate." He objected quietly, and Robin found that it was too dark even for her to see much of his expression. At least he couldn't see her cheeks heating up that way either, nor the stupid foolish smile on her lips, nor the concerned frown that followed. It was dangerous to let him wander around blindly like this… but then again, she couldn't force him to stay behind. Even if it would be very much justified.

They continued walking, or rather stumbling through the forest for some time, and while Robin did her best to stay as close to Snape as possible, she also had to focus on finding what they had come here for in the first place. An Oine; a creature no bigger than a mouse, who shied even the light of the moon and therefore only came out of its tunnels, its home in the ground at night, solemnly in forests like these where the foliage was so thick that not a single silver ray fell through the tree crowns. A paradise for the Oine, a death trap for foolish wizards who could indeed not even light a single lumos. Robin pondered if perhaps light with a different wavelength would have different effects on the tiny animal, if perhaps she could try some good old muggle infrared light or ultraviolet light to at least shed some brightness onto their path without scaring the Oine miles away… But that was an experiment for another day, when she had more time to prepare.

This excursion was the second one of the day already, a quick and spontaneous follow-up to the insect they had been looking for all day. But they had been so very nearby, and it had been dark already anyway, which proved to be just the perfect circumstance. It would've been a shame not to take advantage of that! But due to Robin's underwhelming preparation that was a direct result of this spontaneity, she had only had one night-sight potion on her currently, from back in April when they had experimented on that in the laboratory. Good thing potions didn't go bad, bad thing they couldn't simply be multiplied. So after a very short and to-the-point argument, it was decided that it was Robin's theory, Robin's excision, Robin's potion, and therefore she ought to be the one drinking it. Scoffing to herself with a small smile, Robin wondered if Snape was already regretting his vehement insistence for her to take it. In a way, it was his own fault that he was blindly stumbling through the dark now… He could've had the potion, but no, he had to be stubborn and make her drink it. Insufferable idiot.

Her idiot, which was why she did feel very much responsible for his safety now no matter what he might have to say about the issue. Gods, she had let him out of sight again for far too long while being stuck up in her own head… but she also had to focus on finding the Oine right now, which was practically impossible to do simultaneously. She would have to focus on the latter if they ever wanted to find the little beast, and if they ever wanted to get out of this forest again. Which really wasn't the best idea.

A loud splash suddenly caught her attention, followed by a string of grumbles and curses, and her head snapped up from the ground in an instant. It only took her a few seconds of searching through the dark in startled panic until her eyes landed on something that caused both immediate amusement and immediate pity to spring to her mind instead. Snape's dark frame, entirely sodden and dripping wet, as he sat in the shallow waters of the nearby pond. He had obviously missed the small but steep ledge he now found himself at the very foot of. Oh dear… he looked about as angry as he did when a student blew up a cauldron for no good reason, and was likely just as drenched.

For two seconds, Robin allowed herself to smile and quietly snicker at the sight before her, then she walked over with quick but certain steps before reaching out to help him up. Still grumbling, he accepted her help when she nudged his shoulder to let him know she was there, probably needing her more as a guidance through the dark than a help for getting up, but Robin would gladly serve as either. A few seconds later, they were both up the ledge and mostly dry again. Even if now both of them were covered in duckweed and mud.

"Do you still refuse to wait here until we can leave?" Robin asked once more, and the glare she received in return was palpable even without being seen.

"Indeed." He grumbled, again being too stubborn for his own good. "I have agreed to this endeavour, and now I will see it through with you to the end as well. Darkness or not."

"Fine." She sighed, and seeing as she found herself running out of both time and options, she did the only thing she could think of. She took his hand, and held onto it tightly while her heart skipped a beat both at the rush of tingles and her own boldness. "But I'm not letting you run blindly through the dark anymore. If you insist that we do this together, then we will indeed do it together now. That's the deal."

"Alright." His reply was surprisingly quiet, calm, content almost, and he held onto her hand even more tightly in return. Bloody hell, he would be the end of her like that. But now, for now, they had work to do. Together. "Lead the way, then."

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#snape #severus snape #snapedom #pro snape #snape x oc #severus snape x oc #snape x ofc #severus snape x ofc #snape imagine #severus snape imagine #snape fanfic #severus snape fanfic #snape fic #severus snape fic #snape fanfiction #severus snape fanfiction #professor snape #young snape #snape fandom #severus x oc #young severus #harry potter #harry potter au #harry potter imagine #harry potter fanfic #harry potter fic #harry potter fanfiction #hogwarts #professor x student #Voluptas Noctis Aeternae