#and Xisuma just straight up went for it

[seth-kia]

Etho wasn't expecting much from the season 8 spawn. Maybe a nice forest, a cool island to make into a community center, a village nearby so Joe could get started on his Hermits-Helping-Hermits farms right away.

The two new hermits were to be expected. Xisuma had mentioned the world was still occupied, but that he'd spoken to the residents before about joining. Grian, upon seeing them, immediately ran up to to one, with brownish-hair and light blue eyes, hugging her and beginning to introduce her as Pearl, an old friend.

He didn't expect much from the server spawn. It'd be a regular, if shorter, season. It'd be a good time with old and new friends.

Etho certainly did not expect to recognize the other new hermit, standing straight and tall in the hole Mumbo found them in.

Familiar, fluffy red hair with a dripleaf tucked behind her ear. Bright green eyes that sparkled with an air of innocent mischief, like she'd be far too good at deflecting blame and all too willing to exploit it. Pale skin, a splatter of freckles across her cheeks and shoulders, a lively, vibrant, energetic feeling that spread through the hermits like a wave of excitement.

And that immediate, sharp, and intense gaze, that locked onto him through the crowd.

"Etho?!"

Gem's voice was the same as ever. He always compared it to a songbird's; clear, high, melodic, and expressive to no end. And it cut through the chaos of the new spawn, silencing the hermits. Even Grian, fussing over the other new Hermit, Pearl, quit his excitable introductory chatter.

"Hey, Gem," Etho said, a bit awkwardly. He waved, the smile on his face hidden aside from his eyes.

Her expression went from complete shock to... something far closer to anger. She stormed out of the hole, walked right up to his face, and pointed a finger right up to the mask, nearly touching his nose.

"Uh," Etho said, eloquently.

She slapped him.

Right across the face. A good slap, too, one he'd been privy to only a few times before, following through and hitting him hard on his left cheek. He kind of expected it, so it missed his ear by a centimeter, but he still reeled back in pain, one hand already up to cradle his jaw. She hadn't held back in the slightest.

"Etho!" Bdubs yelled. Several of the other hermits raised sticks and hands, ready to defend him on his behalf. Xisuma stepped forward. Even the other new hermit, Pearl, seemed ready to throw hands on behalf of a friend of Grian's.

The air was tense. He held his breath. It felt like time was frozen, her eyes locked onto his like he was a dead man, like he wouldn't survive the next five minutes.

"Gem?" he asked, softly.

She grabbed him by the shoulders and hugged him.

Tightly. She was much smaller than him, but her presence almost never made a difference until now, when she was holding him tight enough to hurt his ribcage, like she'd never let him go. Between the feeling of his bones creaking and the raw emotion he felt at finally hugging her again, it was almost just as painful as the slap.

"Hey, Gem, it's okay, I'm okay." He tried for soothing, though it came out slightly more like a wheeze. "Good to see you, too."

"I thought you were dead, you idiot!" she said, furiously, face buried into his chest, muffled by the jacket and the fur.

"I'm not. Right here."

She didn't let go of him for a long time. The silence was welcomed, despite the small bit of chatter rushing through the crowd of Hermits, but he just rubbed a hand on her shoulder and gave her a tight squeeze until she finally loosened her grip, looking up at him.

"Well." Etho touched his cheek, which was going slightly numb. "That was a heck of a greeting."

"You deserved it!" she said, but her eyes were lighter, less pained. A little bit more hers.

See, that was the thing about Gem. She had a facade. She didn't want to be genuine, not in front of a crowd. She'd cling to the bit of anger while it served a purpose because otherwise, she'd cry, and she wasn't ready for that yet. Etho was happy to let her stay mad. He was just happy to see her at all.

"Yeah, I guess I kinda did," he said sheepishly.

"You just! Left! Completely vanished off the face of the planet!"

"I'll explain, I promise," Etho said. "I didn't mean to."

"You know, you're supposed to tell me when you get drafted or something, not just up and leave me with no notice at all," Gem said pointedly.

He couldn't help but laugh at that. A huffed chuckle that stumbled over itself in surprise. It felt so good to talk to her again. "I did apologize, you know. Like three times already."

"Stupid. Stupid!" She scoffed. "You owe me for that."

"Well, you're here for the season, Gem," he said, holding out his hands. "I can pay you back. What do you want, diamonds? I can make you a skeleton farm?"

"You'd get those for me anyway! No, I want something special." She frowned, crossing her arms. One finger tapped her cheek in thought, a habit she'd never lost since they were kids. "Aha! I want a note-block IOU from you."

"Uh-huh." Part of his brain was already scrambling together a plan to get the redstone, so he'd have it ready when she asked. "I can do that, yeah."

"And you have to make me an iron farm."

"It's Hermitcraft. There are iron farms everywhere."

"Don't care, I want a personal one."

"Okay. I have a design in mind."

"And. And!" She held up a finger, as if it was far more important than any other thing. "You get me a fox as a pet."

"I'll have it for you tomorrow," he agreed easily.

Gem paused. Looked at him. "You're no fun when you don't fight back."

She threw her arms around him again.

He returned the hug. Instead of his classic one armed sling around the shoulder, he wrapped her up in both of his arms and held her close. She was always far warmer than he was, like a little bundle of heat in his arms. He used to jokingly call her a portable space heater, back when they were younger.

"I missed you," she said softly.

He sighed, feeling himself relax. There was the genuinity. She wasn't as mad anymore. "Missed you too, Gemstone."

"Uh," Grian said. "...So. Welcome to the server, Pearl and... Gem? What just happened?"

Etho glanced up from the red hair in his face--the curse of Gem hugs, always getting hair in your nose, not that he cared in the slightest--and caught all the eyes staring. A pang of nervousness started in his chest. "Oh. Right. Um."

"Etho, they don't even know about me?" Gem said, exasperated. "What kind of brother even are you?!"

"It never came up! I didn't know if I'd ever see you again!"

"You could've called! Or whispered me!" The mask was starting to crack on her face. "Or just... let me know you were okay?"

"I'm sorry," he said, lowering his voice. He put a hand on her shoulder, lightly, and she leaned into the touch. "I couldn't. I... something happened, and I didn't have a choice."

She nodded, slightly. "Okay. But you'll explain. Or I'll just kill you."

"Fair enough," he said, and at her soft smile of a truce, he took a breath. "Uh, this is Gem. She's... kind of like my sister."

"I am your sister," she corrected.

"Adopted."

"You're the adopted one."

"Touché," he relented. Part of him was mildly amused at the heads swiveling back and forth between the two of them, trying to keep up. "She and I were on the same server for a bit, her family took me in, helped me out, and, uh. Yeah."

"Ever the storyteller," Gem teased.

"You kinda sprung this on me," he said, defensive. "I could regale them with that one time where you tried to hug a pufferfish--"

"Don't you even dare."

"--or when I had to come get you out of a tree you climbed to high in because you were scared to get down--"

"You got stuck too--"

"--or maybe when you took a sweet berry from an artic fox and got upset when it bit you--"

"Etho!"

He held up his hands, grinning wider than he had in a while. God, he missed this. He missed their easy banter, the sound of her voice, even her aura of terror, if she wanted to be scary. "Okay! I surrender."

"...Yeah. They're siblings," Tango said, eyebrows raised up so high his forehead was nigh invisible. "What even was that?"

"She slapped you, dude," Ren said.

"I deserved it," he said, at the same time Gem said, "He deserved it."

"What is happening?!" Tango said, his voice going high-pitched.

Etho couldn't help but laugh. A sort of scrambling, snort of a laugh, complimenting Gem's mischievous giggling beside him, and he leaned on her shoulder, wiping his eyes. "Oh, dear. Oh my goodness."

"You still talk like a Victorian woman, you know."

He sighed, halfway exasperated and way too fond. "Mmm. I think I noticed that."

"Do you still say 'oh, snappers' when anything of mild interest happens?"

"Naturally," he said, in mock offense. "What, you think I'd just stop using the best phrase in the English language?"

"God, you literally haven't changed at all!" She said gleefully. "It's like someone just copy-pasted you into this world and gave you a shiny new look."

"Hey, don't insult the jacket. It's warm!"

"You're an ice cube, Etho, it's just like you to wear a winter coat in the middle of high summer."

"Not everyone is a space heater."

"Oh, shut up!"

The hermits had dismissed a bit, then, greeting Pearl, punching trees, but a few of them--namely Tango and Ren--were still swiveling their heads back and forth between them, trying to comprehend any of what was happening. Part of him suddenly felt at ease. Everything was easier now. Gem was here and safe. He could protect her. She'd meet his friends.

Hermitcraft was a safe zone. Xisuma did his absolute best to make sure the server would protect its inhabitants. Gem, being here with him, was the safest she'd ever been.

She tugged his arm, and he looked down. Turned, gave her his full attention. Something he'd always found easy to do. "What's up?"

A pause. Like she was trying to calculate the best way to say something.

"...Your eye? And the mask?" she asked, quietly. Composed.

He flinched, slightly. Involuntarily. "Uh."

She shook her head. "Story for another time?"

"...Yeah. But I will explain."

"You seem to have a lot of explaining to do."

"It's been, how long," he mused. "Ten years? There's a lot of stories to tell. Tell me right now, what have you been up to?"

Gem blinked, as if fully understanding. "Oh. Yeah, I get it. We can talk later."

He grinned. "Storytime later."

"But, uh," she said, even softer. "...Do I get to see your face?"

Etho considered it. Considered lifting the fabric from his face, showing his little sister the scar that went from eye to mouth. The gruesome tearing in his skin. His face was mangled enough as it was from nose up.

Despite her insistence, he had changed. Death games and the constant need to survive did that to a person. He was surprised she even recognized him, let alone as fast as she did.

But. Gem was just the same.

She was the same girl who ran around playing with squirrels. The same little sister who fussed over him after he got hurt in the woods hunting for food. She'd grown, obviously, into her exuberant energy, into her control, her strengths. She was, as a person, whole. Strong. The little girl he used to protect from monsters could protect herself. She didn't need him to shield her anymore, not really.

"...Maybe," he decided. "I, uh, it's easier to explain."

"Okay," she said simply. "If not, that's okay, too. It's just good to have you back."

"You too."

"You never thought to tell me you had a sibling?" Bdubs interrupted, appearing suddenly in front of the two of them, arms crossed and somehow already riding a horse.

"Gem, this is Bdubs, he means to say," Etho cleared his throat, and began in a slightly altered impression of Bdubs, "'Hi! It's nice to meet you! I'm BdoubleO, but you can call me Bdubs!'"

"Hey! I do not sound like that!" he protested. "Anyway! Hi, I'm Bdubs. It's nice to meet you."

Gem hummed in thought, looking between the two of them. "You do, actually."

"Do... what?"

"You do sound like that."

Etho snorted, suddenly, and turned to give her a high five, even as Bdubs shouted in outrage. Tango's hair burned brighter in confusion. Ren had one ear tilted perpetually in their direction.

"What on earth--Etho, don't tell me you're going to side with her!"

"She's my sister, Bdubs, 'course I am." Etho said, matter-of-factly. "Here, I could try again. 'I'm so tall'--"

"Shaddup!"

"Oh, is that why he's on a horse?" Gem asked, looking up at him innocently. "'Cause he's short?"

"I'm five-foot-ten!"

"Oh, so five-seven, right?" She looked at Etho. "It's like fishing, he gets an inch taller every time?"

Etho broke out into laughter, nearly doubling over. God, he missed her. Classic Gem humor. "You need some ice for that burn?"

"You could just try Etho, he's cold enough as is."

Etho shrugged. "Though I'm not sure he could reach me without his horse as a stepladder."

"Argh! There's two of you, I can't take this!" Bdubs pulled away the reigns, charging off in the direction of the other hermits, presumably to complain about getting called short again.

Etho looked over, to find Gem glancing up at him at the same time. That spark of mischievousness was back in her eyes, brighter than the sun. "I don't know if I like that look."

A sly grin made its way across her face, and she tapped a finger on her inner arm. "Oh, we're gonna have fun with this."

"You gonna cause trouble?" he asked, trying to sound stern.

She just laughed. "You're coming with?"

Etho sighed. Fondly. He missed her so much. "Wouldn't rather be anywhere else."

"You're a sap."

He laughed. "Love you too, Gem."

She scoffed, shoved his shoulder. "Let's go, you weirdo."

He took one last look around spawn. Of course, he didn't expect much. But now, he was pretty sure this season was about to be far more interesting.

"You coming, ice cube?"

He laughed, and chased after his sister into the forests of season eight.

--

thanks for reading! here's the ao3 link <3

#fanfic #ao3 #fanfiction #hermitcraft #ethoslab #geminitay #hc s8

[siriannatan]

“You’ve worn those clothes for the last week, you’ve got to change.” “You just want to see me naked, don’t you?” - Grisuma

I felt this urge to write some Grisuma so I did

As with the whole series, the prompt was found over on deity-prompts

AO3

Four seasons. Grian's been part of Hermitcraft for four whole seasons. And has never seen Xisuma's face. He's heard multiple hermits - Doc, Ren, Jevin, even Scar and Mumbo call their admin handsome but could never confirm it for himself. No amount of bugging, pestering and general mischief got X out of his dumb helmet. The only time, it'd seem, he changed was between seasons or bigger updates. Never when Grian was borderline stalking him out of boredom.

But, finally, in his fourth season, Grian came up with an excellent idea. He just needed to catch X asleep, which wasn't easy but Grian could be patient if he wanted to and after a whole week managed to catch X snoozing in his storage area and... Drew a funny face on his visor with a permanent marker. And barely managed to escape before X woke up and just went about his day as if there was nothing on his visor... Did he not use it to see?

Anyway, Grian followed the admin the whole day and no one. Absolutely no one pointed out the winking cat face on X's visor. No one. Doc did chuckle a bit but said nothing. Keralis was Keralis so it was unclear if his giggling was that or the drawing. Cleo just straight-out ignored it and didn't react at all.

By the evening time Grian was fed up and just marched into X's base. “You’ve worn those clothes for the last week, you’ve got to change. Staying in this thing all the time can't be good for you," he announced, marching in with all the confidence and annoyance he had in him.

X tilted his head and... reached up to his helmet as Grian tapped his foot on the ground. "You just want to see me naked, don’t you?" X chuckled and pulled his helmet off.

To say Grian was stunned would be an understatement. Long white hair tied into a messy bun with quite a bit of it just hanging around X's face. Dark, fluffy-feathery long and pointy ears twitched as X inspected his helmet's visor. But Grian was not really paying attention to that. What got him frozen were all the scars on X's face. He wanted to run his fingers along the dark marks he easily recognised as left by his own kind... Not that he was proud of being one or ever said anything. But that also helped him recognise what X was under his suit. A voidwalker. He thought they were gone long before the EVO disaster yet here was X...

"Grian? What happened to my visor?" X asked, levelling Grian with a stern glare of dark purple eyes.

"No idea," Grian lied with a wide grin. "But it looks cute... I should go..." he added and was about to leave before X grabbed his arm. "X?"

"It's late, I'm not letting you fly all the way to your boulder after all the trouble you went through to get my helmet off," X's voice was more and more amused. And made Grian want to curl up into a ball and hide in his wings.

"You knew?" he whined as X pulled him along to wherever his bed was hiding.

"All along, and I agree, the drawing is cute," X admitted with a grin that had Grian blushing.

Everyone was right, Xisuma was darn handsome under his helmet and maybe it was good he kept it on during their little exchange with Empires guys. And suspiciously cuddly in his sleep and damn hard to get away from.

#my stuff #my stories #fanfic #fanfiction #hermitcraft #hermitshipping #grisuma #grian #xisumavoid

[hmshermitcraft]

Scar, grian and mumbo went straight to xisuma and told him all the things that been happening with them and doc and asking him to help them, xisuma just stands there blinking then groans knowing why these three will drag him along to poke the goat once again.

The only reson he agreed to poke the goat with the three well there is 3, 1 scar grian and mumbo are like xisumas kids, 2 his pranking side of him wants to help, 3 to teach doc with all the stupid Redstone stuff he has been pulling over a accident with his mining tunnel mushien.

So as grian was letting doc chase him mumbo xisuma and scar chicken his base, put end crystals everywhere, and xisuma faked a brake up message in the mess of it.

So after doc saw that he freaked out and stopped his stuff with the other three and was trying to "win" x back even though he didn't lose him in the first place.

Doc didn't let go of xisuma for 3 months after that.

Xisuma thought the message was obvious enough to realise it was a prank. He'd never intended to genuinely hurt or worry Doc - that's not what the spirit of pranks are. Especially towards his boyfriend.

Doc felt silly about it in retrospect but he was just... Stressed. And then he'd seen X with the others and worried he might have pushed him too far. He'd felt awful as well for thinking so lowly of Xisuma, even though X keeps telling him this was in no way his fault.

The other three decide to back off their prank war for a while and give them space. Plus, they're pretty cute. (And they're pretty sure X might end up on Doc's side if they're not careful.)

#hermitshipping #ask #grian tag #docm77 tag #xisuma tag #mumbo tag #scar tag #docsuma #rosenight143 #mod 🎀

[drachis917]

Okay hang on I’m gonna write down some rift notes that I learned today (Oct. 23) for future reference. 

Hermits who went into the rift at the end of Grian’s episode: Grian, Scar, Pearl, Impulse, False, Xisuma, Joe, Cleo, Jevin, Cub, Tango, Keralis, and Doc (13 people).

The “Jimmy is in fact a toy” message from fWhip got garbled, but Grian’s “New portal who dis?” message came through just fine.

The rift on Empires made a big booming noise similar to the end portal opening when the first paper arrived, and some people’s pov suggest that it might have caused something similar to an earthquake as well. 

Paying attention to the sound effects at the end of Sausages episode, we heard a crystalline sort of noise and I caught 12 vwooping sounds, though I may have miscounted. 

On Martyn’s pov of the charity stream, he flew into the rift after the event and immediately his stream ended. 

Also in Sausages episode, his visions have escalated to him not just blacking out, but straight-up vanishing and presumably being transported to Afterlife or Season 1. This one I’m not sure is super related, but he mentioned that it was probably getting worse because of the rift so I figured I’d note it down too. 

#hermitcraft #empires smp #hc x empires #Ashe rambles

[spoonmoment119]

I once had a dream I had made it onto the Hermitcraft server, and I guess it was around Christmas and my whole shtick was breaking into Hermit's houses (no doors or windows, just straight up through a wall) and leave gifts of various rarities. The only one who put up with my shit was Pearl, and I had a texture pack/plugin that made it look like I rode a magical sleigh instead of an elytra. There was some weird terrain that was a single block tall thing that went past the clouds that I frequently sat on and Pearl came to talk to me and joke around. We eventually went to the shopping district, and there was a sign of Cub, one of those image on map things, and he was drawn anime style with a ow< face, and the slogan was "Lies, Ties, and Gigapies" and I turned around to see Mumbo and X just beating the absolute crap out of Dream (the green one) and they dragged him behind a building and then Pearl lead me away towards where my mega base was (based off an 18th century church) and then I woke up

MUMBO AND XISUMA MURDERED DREAM????

good for them good for them

#spoon responds #i didnt know they had it in em

[dmwrites]

Chapter 7- The Final Straw

Ch.1 Ch. 2 Ch. 3 Ch. 4 Ch. 5 Ch. 6

——

The final straw, as it turned out, was floating blocks.

“Guys, you gotta come see this!”

Cleo and Michael had been sitting at either end of the grand dining room table in the castle, notes and books spread out all around them, when Joe came barreling in, face pale. For a moment, Michael thought it was just that weird translucence Joe sometimes got at night, but Joe looked unusually frightened. Cleo pulled out her sword and Michael took a notebook, and they followed Joe, who had already run back outside to the courtyard.

“What is it, Joe?” Cleo asked, sword held out, looking all around. It was a peaceful day, relatively, around noon.

“You’re going to think I sound crazy, but I assure you I am not.” Joe gripped the sleeves of Cleo and Michael’s shirts, making them look at him. “You need to come with me to the sand mining desert. I think blocks are levitating.”

“You do sound crazy.” Cleo said. She and Michael nonetheless followed Joe through the nether portal before something in her mind seemed to click. “Wait, why were you mining sand?”

“Okay, maybe I have been moving some walls again…” Joe coughed awkwardly, speeding up just a little bit ahead.

“For goodness sake Joe, I swear to god…” Cleo sighed. “These blocks better be actually leaving the damn ground.”

They emerged through another portal and ended up in the blinding heat of a desert. It was very flat, and the sand seemed to stretch on forever.

“Okay, just look straight ahead. I swear I saw it!” Joe shaded his eyes with his hand.

“Joe, you probably just hallucinated- holy shit!” All three of them gasped as they watched a block of sand rise up from the ground, hover there for a few moments, and then sink back down.

“What?” Michael whispered, looking around frantically. “Wait look! Off in the distance! Another one!”

“I see two over there!” Joe cried, pointing. “It’s like someone invisible is trying to decide what block to take!”

The ground suddenly shook violently beneath them, followed by the gut-wrenching sensation of flying off of the ground and into the sky.

“Oh my god.” Michael said softly. “The moon isn’t going to stop, is it?” He hit the ground, but found it hard to get up. He was shaking- this wasn’t fun anymore, and just now was it fully starting to hit him- these people were going to actually die. And he had no way to stop it. No one did.

He looked to his friends, but Cleo and Joe were looking at each other, and it was in this moment that Michael fully appreciated that these two were lifelong best friends. The silent conversation they were having was intense, and must have been meaningful, because they both turned to Michael, Joe with a twisted, unhappy look, and Cleo with set resolution.

“Michael, you have to go.” Cleo said firmly.

“What?” Michael looked back and forth at the two.

“I think it’s time for you to go back to your home and your radio station.” Joe replied softly.

“It’s getting too dangerous. We can’t have you getting hurt in a place you don’t belong.” Cleo added. “Let’s go find X and get you admin-ed out of here.”

“Wait, no!” Cleo and Joe went through the portal, and Michael followed after. “Guys! This is serious! I can’t leave now! I want- I need to help! I can’t just abandon y’all now!”

“Where is X’s portal again, Joe?” Cleo asked in a clipped tone, ignoring Michael.

“Just here.” Joe said miserably, also not looking at Michael. He stepped through another portal, with Cleo on his heels, and Michael stumbling after them.

“Xisumavoid? Are you here?” Joe called over Michael’s “guys, wait!”s. There was no response.

“Ugh! Guys, look at this!” Cleo called from another room, and Michael followed Joe despite his current strife. She was standing in front of a pile of wet pink stuff on the floor.

“What the hell is that?” Michael asked, disgusted.

“I think it’s pink axolotl skin…” Joe murmured, squatting down and poking at it with a pen.

“Oh my god, you don’t think Evil X, like, disintegrated Xisuma or something?” Cleo asked in horror.

“Wait I thought he just did crypto!” Michael hissed, looking around wildly and raising his sword.

“Evil X, that derpwad? Oh, he’s left! Finally!” A bright, warbling voice came from the front door, and Joe, Cleo, and Michael turned to find a heavily-armored person standing before them, wobbling slightly on his feet.

“Xisuma?” Cleo asked hesitantly, taking a step forward in front of Joe and Michael. “Are you… alright?”

“Oh I’m quite better then alright! I’m back to normal as of about ten minutes ago, quite normal!” Xisuma put a hand to the doorframe to steady himself. “I’m basically back to factory settings, I am! Like it’s my first day on the server- rotten weather for it, huh? It’s reverse-raining out there! Ah, it’s just a pity that the admin powers didn’t get transferred from my axolotl form to this one- I think Evil X took them or something.” Xisuma staggered past them, holding out an arm and running it across the top of Michael’s head. “You look well today, Pearlescentmoon. Keep up the good work, hermits! I’ve been thinking of hitting the nether when things get scary. It’ll be an adventure for sure.”

The three watched Xisuma walk almost drunkenly up the stairs and presumably fall into a bed and fall asleep.

“You know, that wasn’t on my apocalypse bingo card.” Cleo said, blinking quite rapidly.

“Should we… help him?” Joe asked, taking a step towards the stairs. “He seems a little out of it from being factory reset.”

“No, leave him, he’ll be fine. Maybe. The more important thing is- guys, he said he doesn’t have admin powers anymore now that his axolotl form is gone. Oh my god he doesn’t have admin powers. Oh my god!” Cleo took an overwhelmed step backwards, hands in her hair, looking towards Michael in horror.

“Michael… you’re stuck here.” Joe whispered, eyes wide with a horror that was so distinctly human.

“I’m stuck here.” Michael repeated numbly. “Holy shit.”

#September 6 2022 #fic #Michael and Joe and Cleo’s super big adventure ft. the moon #michael mcchill #joe hills #zombiecleo #hc8 #hc x dsmp #long post

[legendaryevokercupcake]

Update on the update (Part one, there might be more) (DSMP)

I'm now writing Hermitcraft crossover fanfic with this premise. I will explain how I got here as simply as possible, not because I think you're id10ts, but because I myself am an id10t.

#1: Sam taking good care of Michael would be cute

#2: Sam did not have food in the prison

#3: What if all Nether Portals went to the same Nether

#4: Michael somehow getting into the Nether

#5: Doc finds Michael in the nether because Doc looks like both Sam and Tubbo

#6: Doc tells Xisuma that there's a guy who's missing and this random baby Piglin is sad about it so if we could check up on that, that'd be great

#7: Xisuma just straight up asks Dream like a normal person, and Dream responds "Oh lol yeah I know where that guy is. He's in the giant prison over there!"

#8: Concerned Xisuma is concerned and tries to figure out if this guy is ok, prompting him to find out that this guy is literally without food and probably has been for several months

#9: Looney Toons style prison break

#10: Hurt/Comfort, but make it Christmas.

#11: And then Michael somehow gets to Hermitcraft, we don't ask how

#DSMP x HC #DSMP x Hermitcraft #Docm77 #Michael the Piglin #Awesamdude #Xisumavoid #Xisuma #Dreamwastaken #Pandora's Vault #Concerned Xisuma is Concerned #Hurt/Comfort

[whogavemoththerighttohyperfix]

Okay, so, Who has been like, brought back from the dead? Who are necromamcers, outside of probably ex (O see the picture of him seemingly reviving Cleo!)

Ok! So basically everyone but Xisuma is undead! X is a necromancer which is very very rare. Like think maybe 1 or 2 alive at a certain time kind of rare. But it’s usually very very frowned upon. A lot of religions are based on death and what comes after so it’s seen as evil intervention.

X didn’t really care about all the superstitious, he saw necromancy as something that didn’t have to be evil it could be beautiful in his opinion, necromancy isn’t just dead animals or people it can be plants and flowers. He didn’t see it as an evil thing.

EvilX was his twin, he was also born with necromancy but he tried to go straight to reviving dead bodies and refused to work his way up. He was intent on being the best, slowly but surely over a few months he tore himself apart. X tried to revive him but his body was too far gone for anyone to help.

You cant learn to be a necromancer it’s something your born with, very obviously born with. The top half of Xisuma face for example is a birthmark of glowing stars, his eyes are a blank white which glow. So it’s not something he can hide. A few people have tried to learn necromancy but it’s never went well

Later on he starts to hide his face under the ender dragon skull so he doesn’t scare people but it’s still very very noticeable.

Everyone else is undead in a form even if X didn’t revive them, Mumbo, Etho and Joe are undead, Mumbos a Vampire, Etho is a phantom and Joe is a ghost, even through they technically were undead it’s not meant to last it’s more a get your shit together before you pass on thing. X stabilised them making it so they wouldn’t fade away.

Cleo was actually the first person he technically revived, they were both best friends when they were little, Cleo being a gorgon and X being a necromancer meant that they were both outcasted from the rest of their village, Cleo was sick like severely sick. Think the plague or something.

Her death was slow and agonising, her skin started to rot off it was awful and X couldn’t do anything to help until after she died. But since he had never revived a person before it didn’t go well, necromancers are meant to heal previous injuries but since X had no practice in people only animals it didn’t go well,

Her skin stayed rotten and pealing. They constantly have to wrap her in bandages, at one point they had to amputate one of her legs because of how rotten it got, X blames himself fully even after hundreds of years he still thinks it’s his fault.

Necromancers lives hundreds of years, and the people they revive only die when he will, and threw those hundreds of years he collected the rest of the hermits, he’s revived people other than them but unlike other necromancers he doesn’t force the people he revives to say with him, he doesn’t even ask a favour.

They travel around in a wagon together, people don’t really mix outside their species, so for a necromancer of all people to give the people he revives the choice to stay and them choosing to was an insane thought, and for them to not use it for popularity instead keeping to themselves and being well hermits was strange

But they love it cause it’s who they are.

Art for the AU cause I lov

#xisumavoid #hc xisuma #evil xisuma #zombiecleo #hermitcraft xisuma #hermitcraft cleo #hc cleo #hermitcraft #hermitcraft necromancy au #hermitcraft au #I love this AU sm I’ll talk about it till the day I die

[fictionfixations]

The Hermit Archives / HC Fic Series [Grian-centric.. ish...?] / Thoughts

So. The Hermit Archives. Where do I even start?

Well first off- I finally read it- I binged it all today actually? And like. so. I've never actually seen The Magnus Archives, which I'm pretty sure is what THA is based off of, but like HOLY FUCK- I think I have a new fixation, which is a bad thing, and I've already had multiple fixations TODAY-

Like Chrisrin who does a few of the book covers for some of em on Twitter had this post pinned with I think THA Scar but hanging upside down as the tarot card 'The Hanged Man' or something and then my brain was like 'what if I wrote a collection of oneshots either connected or not connected that have to do with tarot cards and their meanings and i could pull random ones to decide'

and then now i wanna do the fuckin audio recorder format where its like

[GRIAN]

(STUFF HERE)

AAAA

WHY- i have so many other WIPs I really need to get done that I've been procrastinating for like over a month now D:

My point is though- The Hermit Archives is distracting as fuck and the storyline is just 'HOLY FUCK' and for a series that technically doesn't usually go straight after each other and are instead from different times as well as the statements we 'hear' of, you just get stuck in this story, and it all feels like it connects, like one after the other and the stories are just so interesting, and each statement is like its own little story even though its in like first person stuff which I kind of grew a dislike for eventually, but I just don't mind it in statements??

no but holy fuck i was LOST in this

nothing was stopping me

I was reading for hours and my eyes didn't even hurt or feel tired like they usually do after bingeing for long periods of time the fuck?

no but there was so much that happened and so many other minecrafters--

i mean like holy shit?

okay so like

spoilers. ..duh.

okay Grian has main character energy probably- I think he's most likely the only one who has 'encountered'.. twice, third..-ish..??? Actually i think Mumbo did twice though because the potato incident and the evil moon rock- everyone else, i dunno

BUT. So. Grian has Red Light Green Light where he.. Honestly I wanna say it was similar to third life with desert duo? I think we were all thinking that, except Grian has murderous urges and then continues to have those urges and HOLY FUCK- YES.

Then we have during the moon rock incident.. THE EYES??? we never got an explanation for the eyes- the fuck?

THIRD- we have Cleo's... feathering

WAIT NO FOURTH BECAUSE HE WENT TO TANGOS LIBRARY AND LIKe... fell. and saw pearl. that counts, right? holy fuck man

Also do we even wanna get started on what happened to Etho? He went blind, eyes gone- I wanna say it might've been.. Evil Xisuma....? I can't tell whos who because I'm a dumb fuck, but so basically- EX was like.. carving out peoples eyes and replacing those eyes with his to have total control of their body and live on forever basically, but what happened to Etho? But with Xisuma, EX took out on eye and replaced one, so logically Etho should have two by now, but like..

I mean we will never know will we? But would they really dangle mysteries in front of us if they won't give us an answer?

BUT to what I said, EX probably wouldn't though because he was choosing his family members as his 'successors', and as far as I'm aware, Etho and Xisuma aren't related.

But so- out of all of this- I think that one title that I can never remember how to spell with the study of birds, where Grian went to Cleo to make a deal that he'd stay there for 3 days as like a statue thingy and she would get Joe for a meet up (except not really- but what can she do?)

uhm. so. i wonder- i mean so in the alternate hermit archives, cleo chopped off grians arms and legs and replaced them with wings and bird legs

do you think that wouldve happened if cleo had been more prepared?

huh..

BUT Grian was kidnapped there for like 6 months he said in that alternate. but I'd think that Cleo could finish before that time, not to mention Grian said that he'd been in Cleo's closet with a cloth over his head in case someone would look in ? Cleo didn't even let him out, the statue magic just like.. wore off..??

honestly confusing as fuck but honestly really interesting. EVERYONES INTERESTING- except i dont think we've seen enough with mumbo? We've gotten a lot of pearl and her dreams, a bit of Scar with his death curse thingy, Grian- because hes head archivist, and then we just hear Mumbo about becoming like a vegetable potato thingy and etc-? I think it was Slumber Party or something when the evil moon rock happened, but Mumbo wasn't even the main focus, he just like started it and then everyone else went and encountered the fuckin monster

..huh..

#the hermit archives #the magnus archives #hermitcraft #alternate universe #thoughts #mcyt #au #fanfiction #read on ao3 #ao3fic #fic rec #fanfic #ao3 fic #fic recommendation #fanfic recommendation

[wigglesforsquiggles]

First off: No hard feelings about u not seeing it sooner cus I fully understand my dude XD

Anyways onto more stuff about AU cus my brain is back to rotating djdddn. Basically, cus I'm like this, Stress, Gem, and Iskall are intended as the main povs. Iskall mainly because the original idea was him singing to lift up his friends while they sheltered in their cave.

On another note, Gem and False might be the ones that discovered the curse and permadeath. The idea is that Gem got the curse and (either from traps or direct combat) killed False and just went straight into hiding after her head cleared. Stress found her then was explained what had happened, though they still though False would revive. She didn't. So yeah, another meeting that results in Xisuma looking deeper into the code and going "Welp fuck. Please don't kill eachother and say when you have the curse"

Again still working on everything, but in the end everyone wakes up on the Hermitheseus and end up curling up together. They're safe, they're fine, Renbob is fucking sobbing his eyes out at seeing the fellow hippies and Rendog completely fine but a bit traumatized now. It's all good here vwv

oh thank god they're all fine at the end. i can't imagine the horror of x looking at the code and realising he can't bring back his friends if they die

also iskall my beloved yes main pov. and gem hiding when she found out she killed false :((

ur brain is rotating v hard woah such a cool au!!

#wiggles asks #hi sammy :D #mmm i love this whole concept

[selenealwayscries]

I cannot explain this but animated axolotl Xisuma is my new sleep paralysis demon

#hermitcraft #xisuma #xisumavoid #I DON'T LIKE THE MOVING MOUTH AT ALL #IT WAKES ME UP AT NIGHT #THAT WENT STRAIGHT INTO THE UNCANNY VALLEY FOR ME I CAN'T EXPLAIN HOW IT JUST DID #IT IMPLIES THAT HIS SUIT AND HELMET ARE LITERALLY PART OF HIM AND I DON'T LIKE IT #THAT IS NOT THE REASON WHY I HATE IT THIS MUCH THO BUT IDK WHAT IS

[ferigrieve]

saw @/spacecaving’s post on things shes done as hermitcraft members so i made my own lmao

etho - can recite mutiple gtlive/game theory fnaf videos by heart

bdubs - slept for two days straight and didnt realize until after i had altered my calendar, planner n shit because i thought i had fucked up the dates

iskall - changes outfits frequently because of gender dysphoria. wears a full face of makeup almost every day

doc - got the first yellow and red card on my soccer level. the yellow was because i had asked an opponent to apologize to my team mate for running them over, then a red card for shooting the referee a thumbs up right after.

ren - was kin assigned jacob black. im allergic to dogs

grian - made a shirt that said wife haver and walked out my room and was confused why my parents were yelling at me. im gay

mumbo - accidentally stole like four different plants from two different parks n they are now growing in my room

scar - started a studyblr and was active for like a year, went on hiatus, came back and posted w the caption “im back from the dead” and then got locked out of the account

impulse - accidentally elbowed a friend in the face and knocked out two teeth that actually needed to be removed at the doctor later that day because they had startled me

tango - had a notebook with penises all over it for science class and justifed it saying that its science class and its just part of the human anatomy. a week later every single persons notebook had penises on it

keralis - studied russian for a year n a half. only remembers how to say egg (яйцо)

gem - has a pair of picture frame earrings that have rick astley on them. not a single person has noticed. ive had them for over a year

pearl - puts cheese, milk, whipping cream, butter and egg in my ramen. im lactose intolerant and allergic to egg

stress - has a small container from my grandpa, the only thing in it are two hands that are probably from a figurine of some kind but i dont. own any ??

cleo - saw emma langevin wearing teeth earrings and forgot that humans arent the only things with teeth, ended up making earrings out of my own teeth

false - forgot that i cosplay and left my wig head with a black wig still attached to it on top of a bookshelf thats across from my bedroom door. i also frequently has hallucinations of jack walten who has black hair and white skin , so i walked in room at three in the morning, saw the wig head, and started crying in the middle of the hallway

cub - was mistaken as my dads wife when i was 12

hypno - hid in the lost and found bin at the front of the history classroom during a shooting drill (?) and fell asleep. woke up the next day with teachers in the classroom having a meeting because there wasnt any class that day

jevin - won a raffle for a toy knockoff playdough at school, ate it in front of my class

joe - singlehandedly caused inflation at the kidzania near my house when i was like. eight

tfc - paid mcdonalds to work there for a week, ended up getting food poisoning

beef - was heavily sedated after getting teeth removed and wanted to have plain pasta at like 4am. tried to boil them and nearly burnt the house down. i thought i had cooked the pasta noodles and ate them raw

wels - had to write an essay on a important person at school, wrote it on gundahm tanaka and got a perfect score

xb - was building something out of legos when i was like six, i put a red two by two lego in between my teeth to hold and and ended up swallowing it

xisuma - kicked a toy car and hurt my ankle, decided that kicking a brick wall would make it better, ended up breaking my ankle

zedaph - dug up worms and ate them every day from the big potted tree beside the school bus while waiting for it to leave. ended up derooting the tree from four years of work and it was removed

#hermitcraft #ethoslab #etho #bdubs #bdoubleo100 #iskall #iskall85 #docm77 #rendog #grian #mumbo jumbo #goodtimesiwthscar #impulsesv #tangotek #keralis #geminitay #pearlecentmoon #stressmonster101 #zombie cleo #falsesymmetry #cubfan135 #cubfan #hypnotizd #ijevin #joe hills #tfc #tinfoilchef #vintagebeef #welsknight #xbcrafted

[korasonata]

So, I know it’s not model stream day but I had a bunch of leftover quotes that I cut from the original Joe and Cleo model stream posts due to length. Was originally planning to compile them all together and make a larger master post when they finished the castle, but the list was getting a bit long so decided to do it in parts instead 😅 So here we have all of the other moments I greatly enjoyed that got cut from the first few posts.

—

STREAM 1

—

Cleo: See I can cut straight! But if anyone asks you from the police, I can’t. You didn’t see anything.

—

Cleo: I’m feeling very put out by my chat at this point, because it’s just sort of like “are you sure you didn’t screw up?” No I’m sure I didn’t screw up, leave me alone! Oh…..

SILENCE…

Cleo: …I might have screw-…

SILENCE

—

Cleo: I love it when Joe goes silent, cause you know he’s having a meltdown. And that’s quite funny.

—

Cleo (in response to Joe explaining the use of “Moshi Moshi”): It’s Joe. I don’t know if Joe lies or tells the truth on any given day. But I’m assuming this is correct.

Joe: People are saying “but what if Joe’s a fox?” Well that’s why I said Moshi Moshi! See? And I didn’t go away.

Cleo: I- I’m a fox…I can’t say it….It’s fine…

Joe: Yeah, that’s ok.

—

STREAM 2

—

Cleo: is that Cleo’s hands? No. They’re an imaginary persons hands.

Joe: it depends if you’re watching my stream or Cleo’s.

Cleo: I mean that helps.

Joe: if you’re watching my stream, it’s my hands.

Cleo: if you’re watching Joes stream it’s probably Joes hands. If you’re watching my stream, it’s probably an alien entity.

—

Joe: we actually got a super posh nail salon near me now, and so I was kind of thinking like “oh I should- I should go there and get the green- the chroma green nails before I do this.”

Cleo: oh god Joe.

—

Cleo: This here is a map of what the things should be. What the heck is part 10? I’ve got to find par-

SILENCE

Cleo: ok well I found where part 10 is.

—

Joe: Cleo’s going to have plenty of time to catch up, don’t worry.

Cleo: Catch up from the leading position that I already had.

Joe: Yeah. Well, but to make up for any lost time that you’re currently antago- or not antagonizing. Agonizing over. I’ll know when your antagonizing.

Cleo: Oh yea-you will know when I’m antagonizing.

—

Joe (reading chat) : “How do you determine the limits of Cleo’s patience?” Uh, “are they redefined every time you test them?” Ummm…

Cleo: *laughing* interesting question Joe. I’d like to hear your answer to this.

—

Cleo (about Joes model): it’s very small. We’re not comparing size though.

—

Cleo (reading chat): both Bdubs and Joe have small castles *laughing* We’re not gonna talk about Bdubs’ small castle.

—

Joe: My beard keeps brushing the ringlight which the camera is attached to, so I’m worried it’s vibrating the camera when my beard hits it. And it’s tickling my chin. Which is very very strange.

Cleo: *snort laughing*

Joe: *laughing* Cause normally no one tickles my chin during a stream.

Cleo: *still laughing* It’s not a common thing.

Joe: No, we don’t have like a reward tear for that with channel redemption.

—

Joe (talking about cutting his beard): maybe I should just go trim this one part so I’m not bumping the camera.

Cleo: I- I… I mean, if you wanted to do that on stream I would not- (trails off)

Joe: Oh, you- oh! I guess I can get a mirror out, hold on. I’ve got a mirror, so let me see.

—

Cleo: you know what Joe? I don’t know.

Joe: That’s ok Cleo. I don’t know either. That’s what makes us a good team. Mutual ignorance!

Cleo: CLUELESS!! CLUELESSNESS!!

—

Cleo (about Xisuma and Pearl): We don’t bully each other. Cause I’m always right. That’s how it works.

Joe: Mhm.

Cleo: …the way you said “mhm” Joe made it sound like you don’t think I’m always right.

—

Cleo: To be fair, I do quite like the model making.

Joe: Yeah, other than the fact that it’s like really stressful, it’s really relaxing!

—

Joe (doing a face camera expansion): “EXPAND JOE!” Do do do do!

Cleo (singing the Adams Family): Do do do do!

Both (in harmony): Do do do do!

Cleo: Do do do do! Do do do do!

Joe: *click click*

—

Joe (explaining about his Gomez Adams suit): I went to a tailor in another city.

Cleo: And you just went “Give me the suit that Gomez Adams wears!”

Joe: No! I looked at all the suits and then selected the one that Gomez Adams wears!

—

Cleo: Ghostbusters! *laughing* Don’t bust the ghosts, they’re just trying to make a living guys. Do you know how hard ectoplasm is to get?

—

Joe: Well, but like, for example, if you think about how much CO2 we waste on air conditioning every year, and the fact that people feel a chill when they like, walk through a ghost. You could just have like a- a big ghost that like walks around with you inside of it. As like an air conditioning suit.

Cleo: I don’t- I don’t want any ghost inside of me? Just…saying?

Joe: I mean I guess technically you’d be inside of it, but like…

Cleo: I’m not sure if that makes it worse or better.

—

Cleo (reading chat): “Is the crying to make the paper more supple?” No. The crying is to make us more willing to accept our life choices. That have lead us here.

—

Cleo (in distress): NO! Why would you do that?! WHY?! Why?! Why? Why. Why?!!!

Joe: What happened? Your cat do something?

Cleo: No no no. This is the roof. The roof has decided to not. And now I am deciding to not with the roof!

—

Cleo: Sorry, I’m just trying to keep things together.

Joe: Keep it together, Cleo! Keep it together!

Cleo: I mean, some one of us- one of us has got to.

Joe (desperate): One of us has got to keep it together Cleo, and it’s you! There’s no way the one keeping it together is me!

Cleo: *uncontrollable laughing*

Joe: Sobbing intensifies!

Cleo: Everything hurts and nothing is ok!

Joe (deeply distressed): It’s fine!

—

Joe: At my previous jobs, I would tell them that I don’t want this job. I don’t want this career. I’m good at this technical stuff that you need, and can do it at a price that you can afford. But my priority is being able to drop off my kid at daycare and pick her up at daycare. Everyday. I- My- my then wife will never be available to take care of that child because she’s a PHD student. If the kid is sick, I am taking the day off to take care of her. If you don’t like it? You can find somebody else.

#hermitcraft #hermitblr #zombiecleo #zombie cleo #joehills #joe hills

[redorich]

A favorite trope of mine has always been- getting to see another person’s past. Is it some kind of judgment thing by a higher power? Something like Freeze Day from SCTFOE? Person trapped in a nightmare and their nightmare is being projected? Who knows. All that’s important is after months of healing, some of the Hermits get to see exactly what Tommy went through. It shows short clips of him before being happy, the rise and fall of Manburg, Wilbur going insane, the festival, the withers, all of it. Just short clips of these things though. The last clip of the SMP is just Dream’s mask outlined by his green hood saying, “you’ll stay here alone with just me until you learn to be quite and respectful and not fight those who are in power over you. Even if you have to stay out here *forever*.”

This turned into a whole drabble smh xD

((btw @give-grian-rights helped me so thank you))

-------

The remaining hermits aren’t sure what happened. They have no way of knowing. There was a witch involved, Cub thinks, but what their fallen friends must have done to piss her off to the point of getting cursed is beyond their ken. Among those laid out are Cleo, Grian, Xisuma, Zedaph, and Tommy.

Scar and Cub work their Vex magic together to figure out that their friends are trapped in their worst memories. (Etho calls it a Demonic Hell Viewing Illusion, and False smacks him upside the head for the Naruto reference.) Holding hands with a victim pulls you in, but that’s what they’re counting on. Joe’s already wading through Cleo’s nightmare before anyone gets the chance to ask, and Impulse and Tango aren’t far behind doing the same for Zedaph. However, it doesn’t work for Grian, Xisuma, and Tommy; they were found already holding hands. They must have figured something out about the curse before they succumbed to it. All the hermits can do for them, for the time being, is hope.

Tommy, Grian, and Xisuma wake to the smell of sulphur and smoke. The ground is orange and littered with bullets. Grian grabs Tommy’s hand, and Xisuma grabs a discarded rifle. Tommy points his finger up at the top of a mound of scrap metal and dead bodies. There’s a nether portal, except the obsidian is whiter than quartz. That's where they have to go to get out of here.

All around them, demons lurch and shriek and hiss and all sorts of unholy behavior, bodily flinging themselves at the trio as though they know none of them can take the men on their own, and that just by dogpiling them all one of them will get lucky. Xisuma instantly snaps into a professional mode, the way he sometimes does when he's killing zombies but they keep social spawning. He takes up the lead with machine gun fire and grenades, carving a path through the crowd. Grian takes up the rear with a handgun. Neither Xisuma nor Tommy ask why Grian is so comfortable with a gun. They've got more pressing issues.

An imp gets lucky. It's just enough to crack the visor of Xisuma's helmet, and the imp instantly gets mowed down.

"I can't see," Xisuma rasps through gritted teeth.

"Then take the helmet off," Tommy says, cleaving through an enemy with a sharp piece of scrap metal. Grian breathes in sharply. As far as Grian's aware, Xisuma always wears his helmet.

Xisuma goes quiet for a second. "I suppose you've got a point."

The helmet gets dropped to the ground and demon limbs shuffle it away. They don't have time to look at Xisuma's wild brown hair, his purple eyes, the burn scars on his jaw.

They make it to the portal all in one piece. Xisuma takes one last wistful look at the Martian hellscape, then takes his friends' hands. They step through the portal together.

----

They step out of the portal into the foyer of a high school. Grian's eyes shutter.

"We'll be headed toward the roof, I believe," he says, staring dully through the spectre of a broken, bloody man holding a rope.

Tommy latches onto Grian's clammy hand to ground him as the three ascend stairs and traverse the dark, winding hallways. The ghost follows them. It isn't like Ghostbur-- it's, well, not vengeful, but it's not kind. The man named Gareth keens about Grian's sins, about a boy named Taurtis who Gareth hates, about mafia and yakuza, about his poor wife Jane.

On the last set of stairs, Gareth makes a wailing remark that causes Grian to bodily flinch. Tommy doesn't even know what the ghost said (he wasn't listening).

"Fuck off," Tommy says, "you're the shittest ghost I've ever met. Even my brother could..."

He trails off. This is not the way to fix things for Grian. On a hunch, he reaches into his pocket. Of course the object he's looking for is in there; it's his brother's coat.

He holds the object out to the ghost. "Have some blue."

Gareth warily takes it, dropping his rope. It floods periwinkle, then cyan, then dark royal blue. A weight seems lifted from the ghost's shoulders as he clutches the blue, mutters something about Jane, and leaves.

Tommy takes Grian's hand, then Xisuma's, and they go through the door to the school's rooftop together. They halt as one. The portal is there. Standing between them is a boy maybe Tommy's age, with a corpse at his feet.

"Sam," Grian whispers. "Taurtis."

The standing boy smiles, eyes obscured by a purple mask with a rectangular symbol on it, and flexes bloody wings. The corpse on the ground has blood all over its back, where wings once were, and broken headphones around his neck.

"Man, Grian, you really held out on me," Sam says. "This Watcher power really is something else--"

Sam topples over backward. His body hits the ground in front of the portal. Xisuma lowers his gun.

"He looked like bad news," Xisuma says.

Grian grimaces. "He was. Come on, let's go."

They once again step into the portal.

----

“Do you want to be a hero, Tommy?” Technoblade roars, “Then die like one!”

Their paltry little group of three gets no chance to take in their surroundings, to see what’s going on and where they need to go. All they can process is the legendary PvP champion, acolyte of the Blood God, Technoblade, unleashing Withers upon what once might have been a town.

Tommy yanks them into cover. “I don’t know where the portal is,” he hisses.

Grian squeezes his shoulder. “We’ll find it.”

Explosions rain hellfire down upon them from all angles-- not just the Withers, but TNT buried in the ground. They’re so close, they can see the man who set it off. And he must have, because he’s yelling about it, yelling about his L’Manberg and his unfinished symphony and begging his father to kill him. He’s wearing Tommy’s coat--

Bile rises in the back of Grian’s throat. Tommy wears his brother’s coat.

Tommy’s eyes are glued to the gleaming diamond sword that Wilbur gives to his father. He watches his brother die all over again, and he knows where he must go. He turns his back on his broken family and breathes.

“We need to go to the Nether,” he says. They nod.

The black portal is across the battlefield. They come across corpses more than once on their way, but ignore them. They can’t afford not to.

In the Nether, there is a rickety, dangerous pathway with no rails, made of cobblestone and obsidian and oak logs. Manic-depressive ravings on signs proclaim the path as the road to Logstedshire. Piglins try to knock them off to no avail, and ghasts blow up the bridge behind them as they run. On the other side of the Logstedshire portal is... actually not a hellscape, as Grian and Xisuma have come to expect, but a little village encampment. Nothing is blown up, nothing is amiss, except Tommy himself. And, of course, the figure they spot after they catch Tommy staring at it.

It’s Dream. The up-and-coming famous speedrunner who Grian faintly recalls killing once in MCC, which was apparently a big deal. The man approaches, and Grian realizes where he recognizes the mask from. It’s the same one that Tommy wears.

“Tommy,” Dream says conversationally, “items in the pit.”

Tommy’s hand wavers, reaches up to unclasp his chestplate, but Xisuma’s hand on his shoulder stops him.

“No,” Tommy says.

“No?” Dream parrots incredulously. “You know the rules. It’s for your own good. Armor in the pit. Tools in the pit. Friends in the pit.”

They all gasp, though for different reasons. Tommy’s eyes narrow. “Friends in the pit? You’ve never said that one before.”

Dream’s head twitches. “Friends in the pit. Friends. In the pit.”

The man’s voice is deeper than Tommy remembers. Something seems to resolve within Dream’s behavior, yet he keeps twitching. “You’re in exile, Tommy, you don’t need. Friends. I’m all you need. You were doing so good. I thought you learned to behave. I’m all you need. You don’t need friends.”

What happened to the eloquent poison that used to drip from Dream’s tongue like honey? He sounds like a broken record. All at once, Tommy staggers under the weight of the realization that this isn’t Dream. Somewhere underneath that horrible man that abused him is the real Dream, trapped in his own body and watching the dreamon that possessed him hurt his friends.

Xisuma’s gun makes an appearance again, but Tommy holds up a hand in a silent request for the admin to hold his fire. Tommy grabs Dream by the shoulders, removes Dream’s mask and then his own so that he can look the man in the eyes. “I know you’re in there, Dream. When I get out of this nightmare, I’ll save you. I swear it on my discs.”

Dream’s face twitches erratically. The movement spreads to his whole head, neck jerking. He raises straight up into the air, higher and higher, then explodes into a shower of items and no body. A white portal shimmers into existence.

“What the hell was that?!” Grian demands.

Tommy grins, taking the man’s hand and leading him to the portal. “I’ve got a friend to save.”

Grian snarls. “Tommy, he abused you. He’s not your friend.”

“That wasn’t Dream. It was a--”

“Dreamon,” Xisuma breathes.

Tommy nods. They walk through the portal together, and when they wake, holding each other close, they know they’ve got a mission. They can do it.

#mcyt #hc x dsmp #yandere high school #yhs #doom #cubfan135 #zombiecleo #grian #xisumavoid #zedaph #tommyinnit #hermit!tommy au #hermit!tommyinnit #goodtimeswithscar #ethoslab #joe hills #impulsesv #tango tek #technoblade #wilbur soot #philza #ph1lza #dreamwastaken #me.txt

[frombeyondtheblackhole]

Hermit DSMP Swap AU: Part 7

[I knew that this was going to happen one of these days XP I posted this on the wrong blog at first. XP ok, now it is fixed]

Grian sored through the sky, far to his right the sun sat on the horizon glowing across the water, as he followed the coast. As soon as the day was reset he had gone to his base and shoved a couple of things in a shulker box before heading off to X’s base.

It wasn’t long before the purple top of the portal tower came into view. Grian circled down and skipped to a stop in front of X’s house. Ok, so maybe he was a bit early. Xsiuma was nowhere in sight.

Grian hesitated then knocked on the front door. A couple minutes and X came to the door, he was wearing a t-shirt and sweats, and yawned, running a hand through rumpled hair.

“You're punctual,” X chuckled, “Come on in,” he moved aside to let Grian enter, “I was just getting a morning nap to keep the phantoms off. Spent too many all nighters already trying to fix this,” He shrugged, closing the door behind Grian and moving over to some barrels set against the wall and rummaging around inside.

“Oh, I’m sorry for bothering you. I can come back later if you would rather do this then.”

“Nah, don’t worry about it. Want some coffee?” He asked, pulling speed, regen and fire res pots from the barrel and setting them down on an empty furnace top.

“Sure” Grian shrugged looking around. The interior was sparsely decorated, there was an oak wood floor and exposed roof rafters overhead. Chests and barrels lined one of the longer walls with a crafting table and furnace nearby. There was a bed shoved into a back corner. But that was it as far as furniture went.

X got two mugs out of a chest and started mixing the potions “Sorry about the poor excuse for an interior. To be honest I hadn’t done anything before George showed up and I had to throw something together quickly for him. Do you take speed one or two in your coffee?” He added.

“Juse one, and don’t worry about the interior, did you see the inside of my base last season,” Grian laughed.

“True,” X shrugged, stirring a little fire res into the coffee to heat it up before handing Grian his mug.  

Grian held the mug up to his nose and took a deep inhale, letting out a long sigh of contentment. “Gotta love that smell,”

X closed his eyes and took a long draught before opening them again looking at Grian. Despite the tiredness still hovering behind his eyes he was back in business mode. “Alright, we can go ahead and get started. I really should do something about a table and chairs though.” He added as he started to look around for some supplies.

“Don’t worry about it,” Grian assured, “We can sit outside on the steps, it’s a beautiful morning. Besides, we'll probably want some space to work. Admin stuff might not take up much space but Watcher magic works a little differently.”

“Oh sure, Just let me get my shoes on,” X said. He summoned a pair of boots and the rest of his armor from his inventory and hurriedly started to put them on. Grian wordlessly took X’s coffee mug from him so he could use his hands without spilling on himself and then went out to sit on the steps and wait for X.

He took a sip of his coffee. The sunrise was almost over but the view was still beautiful. Grian remembered X had mentioned he was planning on building a massive statue that would fill up the sky.

X came out to join him, now dressed in his full suit of pink armor, and sat down on the step beside him taking his mug back as Grian handed it to him. His visor was up and he took another sip of his coffee before speaking “So what did you have in mind? You said you wanted to try some things. I’ve done about everything I could think of on my own.

“Yeah, first I just wanted you to give me admin permissions to leave, like you would whitelist someone. From what they were saying it sounded like their admin could give people permission to leave if he wanted to.”

“Yeah, sure. Sounds like a plan, tell me when you're ready,” X said, pulling up his HUD and setting his mug aside on the step beside him.

Grian also set his mug down and stood up “Alright- wait, did you ever actually get around to whitelisting me? I mean, it’s not like I was exactly invited in the first place. This might not work if I’m not whitelisted properly.”

“Yeah,” X nodded “I whitelisted you when we did the last server reset. As far as I can tell your connection to the server is stable.”

“Alright then, X, fire away,” Grian said, stretching.

X typed in the command and then looked back at Grian when finished “It’s done.”

“Alright, I’ll let you know how this goes,” Grian said, rubbing his hands together, soft purple sparks flying as his eyes start to glow. With a sweep of his arm he ripped a gash in reality, edged with purple void, and passed through.

Grian stands in the void where the server dwells, purple currents and mist swirl and push around him. It feels cold against his skin. He shivers. He never liked lingering in the void, it was too open, too vulnerable. Grian flaps his wings and lifts off, the mist billowing around him. He feels no resistance as he leaves the Hermitcraft Server’s domain. It seems like X’s permissions worked.

Grian turns his attention to the Dream SMP Server, he Immediately feels the mist grow thick and warm, clawing at him as he fights to stay airborne. A current knocks him askew and he flaps his wings frantically to regain control.

Slam!

He runs full force into a barrier. Stunned, he starts falling. Falling forever. Grian thinks of Hermitcraft and he can feel the soft mist of the server welcome him. He struggles to twist himself around, ripping an exit in the air below him as he falls.

Grian came tumbling through into the light and Xisuma jumped up from the steps. “Grian! What happened? Oh gods you're bleeding!”

Grian shakily picked himself up, his head throbbing. He touched his hand to his nose and it came away red. “Oh, so I am,” He muttered. “Ow,” He added as his eyes tried to adjust to the bright light of day. Was it this bright when he left? “I just-”

“Sit, sit down, you don’t look so good,” Xisuma insisted, helping Grian sit back on the step.

Grian didn’t protest “Oof, that was even worse than the first time I tried to get into that server. It’s really locked itself off”

“But what happened?”

“Um... for lack of a better explanation, I flew straight into a wall. When I am in the void I can usually move between server’s just by thinking about them. But the Dream SMP is the only server that is Watcher proof. It basically put up a fight and refused to let me in.” Grian explained.

“Hum,” X muttered rubbing the chin of his helmet as he took in the information.

“I’ve still got a couple more things we can try though. We can try and simulate the server reset and if that doesn't work, I might be able to make a special portal to-”

“Oh no you don’t, you’re done for today,” X interrupted “We need to get you checked out and make sure you don’t have a concussion,”

“I’m fine,” Grain protested, standing up and trying to force himself to focus... ok so maybe he had a concussion.

[Notes: Ok, so I wasn’t planning on giving Grian a concussion but sometimes these things just happen. It’ll make things interesting. Hope you all enjoyed this.]

#dsmp #dream smp #hermitcraft #dsmp au #dream smp au #hermitcraft au #hc x dsmp au #hermitcraft dsmp swap au #grian #watcher grian #xisuma

[theres-an-impulstor-among-us]

the hermits as dumb things my friends and i have said on our minecraft server

Scar: Yummy obsidian

Cub: ???

Cub: You eating it?

Scar: Tastes a little bit burnt

Scar: Like smokey burger

...

Cleo: I only want their heads

Cleo: Is that so much to ask

...

Bdubs: Thief

Etho: ?

Bdubs: You’re stealing wild sugarcane

Etho: The operative word being “wild”

Doc: Feral sugarcane

Doc: Just like normal one but can bite you

Etho: Like Bdubs

Bdubs: Yes!

...

Grian joined the game

Grian: I don’t care about Jesus

Mumbo: Oh my god Grian you just killed me

Mumbo: I’m dying at that being the first thing you say when you log in

Grian: My teacher is talking about Jesus and I went to play Minecraft instead

Mumbo: Reject Jesus, embrace Minecraft

...

Zedaph, looking directly at a hoglin’s backside from two blocks away: I wonder why this hoglin isn’t attacking me

...

Grian was slain by MumboJumbo

Iskall: Casual murder

...

Scar: I have 1 heart

Bdubs: Where are you Scar I just wanna talk

GoodTimeWithScar was slain by Bdoubleo100

Xisuma: F

Xisuma: Here lies Scar

Bdubs: I’ll give you your elytra back if we can have a truce

Scar: I know where you live

...

(Grian’s first day in season 6)

Cleo: Hunt heads

Cleo: That’s what I do

Cleo: Speaking of which can I have yours

Grian: S-Sure?

Cleo: :D

Cleo: Lemme just get my executioner hood

Mumbo: Back sorry

Mumbo: What did I miss?

Cleo: Murder

Mumbo: CLEO

Cleo: I neeeeeeeed the heads

Mumbo: I wanted to wait til he dies first

Mumbo: Not straight up execute him

Cleo: Oh

Grian: WH

...

(In Impulse’s base)

Tango, popping by for a visit: Hey G

Grian: What do you mean

Grian: I’m at my base

Grian: Doing nothing

Grian: Nothing sus

Tango: Understandable have a great day

...

Mumbo: Why the frick is there a snowball in my furnace

Mumbo: Grian

Iskall: SDFGH

Grian: THAT WASNT ME

...

Mumbo: Iskall assaulted me with snow today

Grian: That’s exactly what I’m gonna do too in a sec

Mumbo: ASDFGHJK

Grian: I’m coming for you

Mumbo: Oh no

...

(After destroying the goat statue)

Bdubs: *chuckles* I’m in danger

Doc: Not yet :)

Bdubs: Thanks that’s very unsettling

...

Cleo: That awkward moment when you accidentally give the armour stand your sword and then take his pants while trying to get the sword back

Joe: ASDFGH

Cleo: Feels like you weren’t expecting that message

Joe: I was not

...

Grian: Would you mind if I killed you

Bdubs: Gimme a sec

Grian: Now for something I never thought I’d say

Grian: Would you like to run away first

...

Grian: Watch this

Grian experienced kinetic energy

Impulse: Epic

Tango: Flew into a wall?

Grian: Okay that spread my stuff out more than I expected

Impulse: Welcome to my base

...

Grian: I like killing myself every now and then

Mumbo: That sure is a sentence

...

Grian: Oi I wanna raid your base Mumbo where are you

Grian: *visit

...

Etho: I’m gonna hunt you

Etho: :)

...

Grian: I love brutally ripping off the heads of defenceless creatures, vicious mobs, my friends, and myself

#hermitcraft #grian #bdoubleo100 #impulsesv #bdubs #tangotek #zedaph #goodtimeswithscar #cubfan135 #etho #ethoslab #mumbo jumbo #xisuma #zombiecleo #docm77 #vaunna’s thoughts