#and ableism plays a big factor into it as well

[bonebabbles]

Jagged Peak sucks too

And I'll say it actually. Gray Wing's anger is completely fucking justified. This has nothing to do with Jagged Peak's disability, this is because he's completely irresponsible with the well being of children

This isn't the first time he lost track of the kittens when he was in charge of them, either. Last time this happened they had to mount a rescue mission.

We see Sparrow Fur get painted a lovely shade of red in her own blood because she ran off on her Father Quest, mauled by One Eye in her goal to reconnect to her mother's domestic abuser, while Gray Wing trusted his brother with ONE JOB to make sure they didn't do something ridiculous

Gray doesn't know that Sparrow looks like a Children's Hospital right now, but he does know she's missing. And he learns where she is from OWL EYES

JAGGED PEAK SAID IT WAS OKAY

FOR SOMEONE ELSE'S CHILD

TO RUN INTO THE FOREST

TOWARDS A GROUP THAT IS HARBORING A WIFEBEATER

AND DIDN'T EVEN HAVE THE DECENCY TO BE THE ONE TO TELL GRAY WING THAT HIS ADOPTED DAUGHTER IS NOT IN CAMP

It gets worse. Gray Wing calls him over FURIOUS and Jagged Peak plays stupid

"IS THERE A PROBLEM THAT I LET YOUR CHILD GO LOOKING FOR HER ABUSIVE BIODAD IN THE WOODS, UNACCOMPANIED?"

Jagged Peak started to look uncomfortable :(((((((((( "im sowwy i thought it would be okey :( after all the wifebeater is HER FATHER, gray wing, guy who was mates with turtle tail and is the only paternal figure the kittens have ever known. i thought you wouldnt be a little bitch about it because she's big enough that a fox could eat her in two bites instead of one."

THESE KITTENS WERE BORN IN SUMMER. IT IS CURRENTLY AUTUMN. THEY ARE, AT MOST, 6 MONTHS OLD. That is assuming that they were born at the start of summer and this is the end of autumn.

Most likely scenario is that we are looking at 4-month-old kittens, and Jagged Peak said it was FINE for Sparrow Fur to run off on her own into the Oh So Dangerous Woods

How many stupid pills is a lethal dose?

You do not, under ANY circumstances, "GOTTA ADMIT HE WAS RIGHT"

EVERY time I believe that this arc has scraped the BOTTOM of the barrel, I hear the sickening crackle of wood and peak over the rim to watch them scooping out splinters.

"all three of them wanted to train with the man who got their mom killed, gray wing. so i let your 10 year old run off into the woods. 10 is old enough to make their own choices gray wing. come on man. c'maaaaan"

Then he starts gushing about how HE is going to be a dad, because that's just fucking GREAT, Jagged Peak. You've really proven how responsible you are and how much you can totally be trusted with children.

RE: This has NOTHING to do with Jagged Peak's disability. None of that is a factor into LETTING CHILDREN RUN OFF INTO THE WILDERNESS UNSUPERVISED

But then The News reaches the Moor cats. Sparrow Fur has been mauled and she is hanging on for dear life. What a turn of events!! No one could have seen this coming!!!!!! Gray Wing rips into Jagged Peak.

All THREE of you suck. NONE of you are okay people. You are all BLIGHTS on my eyeballs and I wish all three of you fell into a meat grinder at the end of this series

Gray Wing downplaying Clear Sky's role in everyone's pain and torment. AGAIN

Clear Sky "ohhh I feel dreadful :(" good. die.

Jagged Peak: "im sorry b-b-b-b-b-BUT your daughter was INSISTENT, so, you have to forgive me for letting her run into the woods alone--"

Before you go ahead, go on back up. Read that again. Sparrow Fur was put in danger because of Jagged Peak's STUPID choice, and he can't even FULLY take responsibility for it. "I AM sorry, I should have checked with you................................ BUT."

Always, ALWAYS in this series, a character who is angry is treated as JUST AS BAD as the person who hurt them and mustered up a shitty apology.

You expect me to take Gray Wing FINALLY expressing anger towards the shitty people in his life as a bad thing?? You think I'm supposed to see this as an expression of ableism???? TWICE now Jagged Peak has let children wander off, they have been KIDNAPPED in the past, and now Gray Wing is faced with losing ANOTHER family member. All because of Jagged Peak being an irresponsible manbaby who couldn't say no to an "insistent" child

His leg had NOTHING to do with this. Jagged Peak is the same reckless kid that charged out of the mountains and forced Gray Wing to follow him to prevent him from becoming eagle food, not thinking about anyone else besides himself, but this time he isn't a kid anymore. He's an expectant father.

Fuck, I'll bet you that it's why he let Sparrow Fur run off into the woods alone in the first place. "I did it and turned out fine!" When he's always had GRAY WING behind him to save his ass

Is this harsh? Yes.

Is it deserved? ALSO YES. Jagged Peak should take this shit to heart and THINK about what it means to be a parent before his children come into the world and have to deal with having HIM for a father

TEA.

A BOSTON HARBOR FULL OF TEA

I hate that the only time this arc ever lets Gray Wing fucking unload onto someone, it has to go and try to make it a big shameful thing that he's NOT being a total doormat. He's RIGHT.

Jagged Peak needs his wife to jump in and stand up for him because he can't face the fact that his stupid, careless decision put Sparrow Fur in danger and his brother, NOTORIOUSLY A PUSHOVER, is rightfully losing his shit with him

Jagged Peak, I hope it felt just as good to smack your brother as it did to call Bumble a fat slob before you stood by and watched her get dragged back to her domestic abuser. The same one you let a kitten run to. I hope your paw falls off.

But before it does, I hope you learn to take responsibility for your actions. Loser ass.

And before someone tries to clown at me about "Oh but Gray Wing was legitimately ableist to Jagged Peak in the past so actually it's not okay that he's yelling at him even though he's totally right!" Do you mean the time he prevented him from running towards a forest fire, the same one that also permanently disabled and ends up killing Gray Wing himself via complications, that everyone could only barely escape from with a lot of jumping? Or do you mean when he told him to defend the camp instead of joining in on the First Battle Murder Party, when Clear Sky was indiscriminately slaughtering people?

Or do you mean when Clear Sky was insulting him in public by calling him useless and Gray Wing was out here trying to insist that he IS useful? Which is its OWN bucket of problematic worms, but no, NEVER in a way that was meant to insult Jagged Peak for his ability or lack thereof.

This is completely new. He has NEVER snapped at Jagged Peak like this.

In fact I even point out in the link above that Jagged Peak shouldn't have to "justify" his existence. His life has value (even though he treated Bumble like hers didn't). That doesn't mean he can't face criticism for what he just allowed to happen to Gray Wing's adopted child. That doesn't mean he'll make a good dad if he doesn't smarten up. That doesn't mean Gray Wing shouldn't be fucking pissed at him.

Shove off, Holly. Shove off, get lost, play in traffic, suck an egg. You should take out your pain on the person who is responsible for sending a child to an unsafe camp with her mother's abuser where she got mauled, actually. That's completely fucking reasonable.

Holly x Jagged Peak FOREVER. HAND IN UNLOVABLE HAND. YOU CERTAINLY DESERVE EACH OTHER, IF NOTHING ELSE

Disclaimer: This is not a Gray Wing defense post. All three brothers are terrible. Clear Sky remains the absolute worst. Jagged Peak is the "least" bad but he's still fucking awful.

#this arc is going to give me an aneurysm #How do you have three children and all of them come out with their own unique flavor of awful #NIGHTMARE blunt rotation #tw ableism #tw child abuse

[karin-miyoshi]

Do you think yuyuyu is ableist?

sheesh, talk about a loaded question

definitely opens up a lot of rabbit holes. ill give my opinion, but note im not the most educated on the subject itself so giving a definite answer is outside my scope.

ill put a read below, but for me, i personally think it isnt, but can be easily misinterpreted as is on a surface level.

tldr, ableism is discrimination towards those with disabilities.

the character in question most of the time when it comes to these topics is tougou, who uses a wheelchair in season 1 due to losing function in her legs. there are never any distasteful jokes made about this, and the show constantly shows various handicap friendly services throughout the show. something even more surprising is that these are never the core focus of the scene or pointed out, its always well integrated into the world as if it were normal (important).

just skimming through s1, we have:

wheelchair assistance integration for both cars and stairs

special swim courses for the disabled, not separated from the rest of the class

beach wheelchairs and separate assistants

now while we can assume a lot of these were due to her previous service as washio sumi, i dont think that would really be fair to the production team putting these in, and it really feels like theres a lot more heart than "yeah we put these for the big shock value realization later on". even after regaining function in her legs near the end of the season, tougou's priority was always towards yuuna and her recovery.

onto the next topic, which is the show taking away and then returning these characters functions throughout. whats important to consider here is what is considered tragic, is it the characters living without these certain functions, or is it the act of losing these functions themselves?

"It'll definitely improve. I mean, we haven't done anything wrong." (Fuu, s1ep9) again, no distasteful jokes made about their disabilities, and fuu even plays it off with her sick eyepatch. her worries instead stem from the loss of itsuki's dream, in the form of her no longer being able to sing. thats the key factor here, being punished for doing what is right, losing the ability to do what you could do before, losing the memories of the time you spent with your friends. (thats another thing i see with a lot of these arguments, they always bring up physical disabilities, but ive never seen one actually talk about ones regarding memory, arguably the most precious thing to them). tougou flat out doesnt remember sonoko at all despite being comrades in arms before, and understandably freaks out that the same might happen with her and yuuna.

now, understandably, the ending to s1 seemed super rushed, and them getting their bodily functions back seemed rather sudden. this put a lot of people off, and was really only explained in s2, which many didnt watch.

people should be allowed to grieve if they lose something important to them, and should be allowed to be happy if they get it back. personally, i dont think people realize the weight of their words when they say, "oh i wish karin wouldve stayed deaf, itd be really cool to see the club members learning sign language for it" or "yuuna in a wheelchair was really cute, i wish we saw more of it." yeah its a cool idea i guess, maybe something to see while theyre stil recovering, but forever? in a chase to see more representation, i hope they realize what they are wishing onto others eventually (even if fictional). while many with disabilities are satisfied with their life, they should be able to wish for better if they wanted to, its not like theyd wish their circumstances on anyone else, right? shouldnt the same apply here, to the girls who've actually lived both with and without disabilities?

just my two cents, hope this wasnt too hard to read! theres a lot more i could write up, especially regarding sonoko, but thats a whole other discussion i should probably save for another time

#this is like a month old ask but i. h really didnt feel like answering it because of how long itd be yeah #yuyuyu #yuki yuna is a hero #yuuki yuuna wa yuusha de aru

[ziipzeepzop-eez]

彡✩˚₊‧ | INTRODUCTION + RULES |

💭 aka, some fun facts about the cute lil admin of this here account.

๋࣭⭑ she / her

๋࣭⭑ '04 liner

๋࣭⭑ infp-t

๋࣭⭑ don't hesitate to drop into my inbox !! love chattin'. requests are not open at this time but i'm more than down for a nice convo, or spill some tea, or airdrop a meme. i dunno. anything. 😚 'm down for it all.

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❗⚠️📢 DNI : t-cest, proshipping, homophobia, ableism, pedophilia, TERFS, anti-Palestine, racism, incest, xenophobia, anti-BLM, sexism, porn bots, suicide baiting, MAP, & NSFW.

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୧ ‧₊˚ 🍵 ⋅ 🅵🆄🅽 🅵🅰🅲🆃🆉 🅱🅴🅻🅾🆆

i'm a christian !! praise Jehovah Jireh. i'm not here to get into any arguments or unnecessary tiffs; i'm a simple person. respect goes both ways. we ain't gotta agree on any nor every thing. i'll try to love you unconditionally tho. simple as that !! 😌🌱

i have a lot of nicknames on here, and it just keeps on growing. but i'm most commonly known as zeep !! or zeezie, or zen, or ziibobo, or zeezabeep, or ziip, or eez n' eezie, or ziikz, or zeevett, or big sister, or little sister, orrr . . . whatever fun little monikers you can come up with !! i'm open to any and all of them. ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )

i'm a creative writer and adore it with my heart and soul. poetry, fan content, personal accounts, & sometimes i write requests too !!

⪼ and furthermore on this subject . . . writing is a beloved hobby !! i won't always have the time / energy for it :'] but when i do . . . it can take me a while to upload requests sent in !! i like to be detailed and thorough in what i write, as it is my primary creative outlet and serving as much as possible to the recipient is just as meaningful as it is to serve my personal liking as well — in addition to what i have going on in my personal life & the genre of the request ( i won't take every request. ) are all factors that play into the release. it could take weeks, even months for me to upload depending on the factors of this here equation. so if you're willing for ambiguous waiting time, then by all means. 🩵

& i always thank you all for your patience !! ◝(ᵔᵕᵔ)◜

residential floater here ~ i'm actually involved + interested in a lot of different fandoms. but most commonly you'll probs see dabbles of k-pop , ninjago , atsv/itsv , dc (batfam-centric !!) , mcu , the outsiders (1983) , bnha , kny , danny phantom , httyd , and many others !! the hyperfixies go crazyyyyyy.

& i commonly refer to my beloved mooties as "beeplings." term coined by me : zeepie beep !! (˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧

concerning fan content, i currently write for rottmnt !! whether this list will change is only told by time, so keep an eye out for any updates here !! 🥰

⤷ pending requests : 4

⤷ request status : closed for now ! 🔐

#𖡻 welcome to the zeepie beep show 🎙!! ๋࣭⭑ #enjoy your stay. 🩵 #zeepie beep and her beeplings

[ingravinoveritas]

I mean no disrespect, but I wonder if you realise that probably all the main plot points of Staged are scripted? Including acting cues like David and Michael touching, comforting, asking who is the big spoon etc. “Georgia says we’re like a married couple” doesn’t actually mean Georgia said it, it means Simon Evans wrote this line for David.

I see in your profile that you’re on the spectrum, and I am not sure if that’s one of the reasons it’s hard for you to discern the difference maybe? (Again, no intended disrespect. Please take this as a well meaning message from a well wisher. My brother is on the spectrum and he has a tendency to do this). The show is so meta at this point, it’s understandable if it felt confusing and hopeful maybe.

But we have to keep in mind that they’re simply actors with amazing chemistry, and the entire show dynamic is playing on that. In reality, their friendship may be very different to how it is portrayed. Not to mention, the romantic components are just for show. They can play so much on it mainly because David and Michael are both men in committed heterosexual relationships. This is not coming from a homophobic place either, considering (like the rest of tumblr) I definitely ship Aziraphale and Crowley romantically. But the actors themselves, well, I don’t think it’s healthy to go there?

Anyway sorry this was very long. Please take care of yourself.

Hello, Anon.

There are a lot of things I’d like to say in response to this. I’m not sure if you’re familiar with the concept of “benevolent ableism.” I’d like to explain it, but first it might help if I give an example of malevolent ableism.

Four years ago, I was interviewed for a movie about the first person ever officially diagnosed with autism, which is based on the best-selling book of the same name. The movie is set to premiere nationally in the U.S. on PBS next week, and they’ve begun doing promotion on social media ahead of it. In the post PBS made on Facebook the other day, someone left a comment calling autistic people “feeble-minded vermin” and insisted on the “complete and total extermination” of autistic people “on a global basis.”

This is something that we would immediately recognize as ableism. It’s hateful, it’s angry, and it calls for actual genocide against autistic people. Because in this world, this is the mentality that some people actually have toward people on the spectrum--that we are different, less, inferior. “Other.” And they are making their feelings about that difference very clear, and in no uncertain terms. Of course, this is an extreme example, and not necessarily something most of us are likely to encounter in our day to day lives.

Which, then, is where “benevolent ableism” comes into the picture. What this term tends to refer to is when neurotypical people speak or behave in ways that are hurtful and demeaning to autistic/neurodivergent people while under the pretense of being “helpful,” “kind,” or even “well-meaning.”

It’s things like telling someone “Oh, you’re too pretty to be autistic.” It’s deciding a place/situation is “too much” for an autistic person and convincing them to leave because you think you know “what’s best” for them. And in this case, it’s assuming that I must not know the difference between fiction and reality because of my autism and writing in to tell me that I am “wrong” about Staged because of it.

The common thread in all of these is something called “infantilization.” This happens when autistic adults are treated as children in big bodies and believed to not have the capacity to understand things solely on the basis of being autistic--regardless of chronological age, developmental level, or any other factors.

This is what I feel you have done here, Anon. You are talking down to me, but I am not a teenager, and I’m certainly not a child. I’m an adult woman, and if you’d spent more than five minutes on my blog, you would know that I have shipped Michael and David since 2019, long before Staged was even close to being a thing. My reasons for shipping them have nothing to do with the show or a script...but I get the sense that that doesn’t make much of a difference to you.

Because I’ve gotten plenty of hater Anons due to shipping Michael and David in the past, but this? This is by far the worst. I would rather get Anons calling me the R-word or any other of the many names I’ve been called, because at least I know where they stand. But when you use the words “well meaning” and “no disrespect” and then proceed to talk to me the way you have here...I am truly at a loss.

There are so many things I could tell you. I could tell you that I have a Masters degree. I could tell you I’ve spoken at the United Nations twice. I could tell you I’ve given a TED talk. I could tell you that I completely and wholeheartedly disagree with nearly everything you’ve said about Staged and Michael/David’s dynamic and what was scripted, and provide multiple examples and thought-out, compelling arguments explaining my rationale.

But none of it would matter, because you took one look at my blog and all you saw was “autism.”

Not me. Not Amy. Just “autism,” and everything you believe that means. And in doing so, you have insulted not only my intelligence, but my humanity.

Yet I’m supposed to believe you “mean no disrespect” (I think you did) and that you are not homophobic (I think you are). Or at least biphobic, because even though Michael and David are in straight-passing relationships, it does not automatically mean they are straight.

(Nor does it mean that is the reason they felt comfortable playing up the romantic elements of Staged 3, an argument that absolutely makes no sense to me because--and you would also know this if you’d read my blog--the last thing I think Michael or David would ever do is queer-bait or specifically play something like that as a joke.)

If only one thing comes out of me answering your Anon, I hope it’s this: I am in a place of confidence now. I know who I am. But I also know that if another autistic or ND person had gotten this message, it could have destroyed them. Your words are the words we’ve heard before--from parents, from teachers, even lovers--and they are no less dehumanizing as we get older.

I know that I don’t know you, or your brother, Anon. But if I got this feeling from your attitude, I can almost guarantee that he has gotten it, too, and that it has affected the way he sees himself. He may not say it to you, may not express it, but the things you say and the way they make him feel live in a place deep inside, and that is something that never fully goes away.

So I hope you will take this as an opportunity. An opportunity to learn, and to do better. Because I deserve more than to be seen as the sum of my limitations. I deserve to be seen as Amy, as the woman I am, of whom part, but not all, is being autistic.

 I deserve better than this. And so do all autistic people.

#anonymous #reply post #i can't even with this nonsense #and this was me trying to keep my response short #this almost makes me want to not even bother writing my Staged 3 review #because apparently no matter what I say I'm wrong. because autism. #i mean what can i possibly say #i'm feeling a lot of feelings #personal post #autism #discourse

[phatcatphergus]

Sorry to flood your inbox, but to add on what a previous anon said, it might also be cc!Phil treating Tubbo like a kid bc he helped raised him.(?)

Like, ccPhil was the main adult in both Tommy and Tubbos lives during their fame in 2020, and while they both had families, he was one of the main ones helping them both out and I believe he might also be stuck on that mindset.

Seeing Tubbo as a child because thats the person he met. Idk much about the ableism part, but i know he is guilty of treating Tubbo like a child despite knowing fully well Tubbo is an adult.

Like Phil, from what i remember, talks a lot about how much Tubbo's grown and doing smart and adult things (like drinking) and shames chat when they say dumb shit like that, but he is also guilty of babying Tubbo when he really shouldnt be.

Thats my two cents, sorry if its long, but it hurts when Tubbo is doing things that I personally do, and Phil just tells him to shut up despite it being part of his personality.

No worries! I love getting asks and having a genuine discussion so it's all good!

I see where you are coming from but I don't really know exactly how much Phil "raised" Tubbo. I think there are a lot of factors that go into that but overall I think a large part is fandom interpretation. The SBI family dynamic was basically the only thing that people talked about when talking about SBI and their dynamics. It was pushed a lot by fans and the creators really played into the family roles and adopted some of it into on-screen relationships.

I think Phil had a large part in helping both Tommy and Tubbo navigate streaming and the internet because of his experience with it. I would not say that he helped raise them and I don't think that he would say he did either. I think he gave good advice from his personal experience when they needed it but outside of rp and fandom spaces, I don't think the family dynamics carried over. I do think there is a difference between Tubbo and Tommy and how they interacted with the SBI and Phil specifically, but I won't get into that right now.

I agree that he thinks he had a hand in their growth and has been more protective over them because he's known them since they were young and was a mod who saw the creeps in their chats. but I wouldn't say that he thinks he helped raise them. I think he sees himself as a mentor figure and someone who is older and therefore wiser than Tubbo for a few reasons. Knowing him since Tubbo was young is a big part as well as helping him through his streaming career and just being an older friend in general.

I think that overall his ableism comes from a mix of seeing Tubbo as the fandom sees him, feeling like he's older and smarter because he's known Tubbo for so long, and just ignorance.

Also, he does correct chat sometimes but it's only for things that are inherently adult such as drinking or the whole Kick CEO Twitter thing. he has trouble treating Tubbo like an adult when it goes against Phil's idea of being an adult such as rambling or eating habits (which I have thoughts on but that's another time).

#Also i would disagree that he was the main adult in their lives #he was the main adult on stream but both of them have a very strong relationship with their families #anon asks

[midorree]

How (I Think) Quirk-based Discrimination Works In BNHA

I've seen a lot of claims about how people interpret the quirk-based discrimination from an ableism allegory (not quite) to actually comparing it to Jim Crow laws, which is completely out of pocket. Quirk based discrimination in BNHA is very unique, especially with quirks not existing for very long in the grand scheme of things. Trying to compare it to existing forms of discrimination (that, mind you, exist in the fucking show) is simply put, not accurate in the slightest. Racism has existed for long enough for it to be embedded into our everyday lives and systems. Ableism has existed long enough that it affects how we view disabled people as people and how doctors view their disabled patients. Quirk-based discrimination has not.

PART 1: Comparing and Contrasting: Ableism

I've had this conversation a couple times with my friends, and typically we find that ableism doesn't match up with qbd. First and foremost, let's define a disability.

[Image ID: disability: a physical or mental condition that limits a person's movements, senses, or activities. A disadvantage or a handicap, especially one imposed or recognized by the law. End Image ID]

Quirkless people do not meet this standard definition unless they are already disabled. Being quirkless does not limit movements, senses, or activities in any way shape or form. Being quirkless is not a hindrance in every day life when it comes to these specific criteria.

But why would people thing that being quirkless is the same as being disabled? Let's take a look at accommodations and accessibility.

In the BNHA universe, quirks have existed for long enough that people with mutation quirks that alter their body significantly can comfortably buy clothes as seen with Shoji in some occasions.

[Image ID: Shoji is wearing baggy, patterned pants tucked into laced boots and is wearing a tank top. End ID]

He is able to buy shirts with bigger sleeve holes rather than having to fix his clothing so that he may be able to wear it himself. This is also seen with UA making a uniform so that he can fit without him having to work excessively for it.

[Image ID: Shoji wearing UA uniform. The uniform has no sleeves. End ID]

Why does this matter? Because Shoji is a perfect example of how small accommodations for people mutation quirks exists idly in the BNHA universe. Everyone has a different quirk and require different accommodations, and with Quirkless people, when it comes to buying clothes, or walking up steps, or going comfortably to a restaurant it's never a problem! Assuming they are able-bodied/neurotypical, they truly won't have a problem with getting by in day to day life.

However, there is one thing I will say is similar to ableism in this aspect: how doctors would treat quirkless people. With the opening episodes/chapters of BNHA we see firsthand how a doctor treats a child who is quirkless. Uncaring, cold, and straight to the point as to let them down as hard as they can saying "you might as well get used to it." The doctor had little to no belief that Izuku would become a hero, saying that he should pursue other careers instead. It's not a perfect match up, but I'd say in my personal experience it's pretty similar.

PART 2: Racism in BNHA

I'm not going to dwell long on this one because it's frankly very tone deaf and not very thought out to be comparing qbd to actual racism.

[Image ID: White text on a black background that states: What was worse, he would now be forces to keep his family from visiting or even living in America. It was never talked about openly, but the way quirkless were treated in the States came very close to how they handled different races with the Jim Crow laws of the past. He would never subject his Izuku to that kind of hatred. End Image ID]

There's a lot to unpack here, but let me preface this by saying this: qbd and centuries upon centuries of racial discrimination are not the same thing, especially considering racism exists in the show/manga itself. Big Yikes.

Let's start by defining what Jim Crow laws were.

[Image ID: Jim Crow laws were a collection of state and local statutes that legalized racial segregation. Named after a Black minstrel show character, the laws—which existed for about 100 years from the post-Civil War era until 1968—were meant to marginalize African Americans by denying them the right to vote, hold jobs, get an education or other opportunities. Those who attempted to defy Jim Crow laws often faces arrest, fines, jail sentences, violence and death. End Image ID]

So lets make a hypothetical and say quirkless people were treated like this. Okay, what would be an identifying factor in discrimination? Would quirkless people have to tell employers their quirk status? Possibly. Would the right to vote be revoked? Due to what? Would they be held back in educational places? Why would they be?

There are too many unanswered questions as to why these things would happen. The Jim Crow laws happened due to white entitlement after the enslavement of an entire race. Qbd happens because of inherent power dynamics (which I will get into later), and while racial discrimination has that factor, it has existed way longer and is more prevalent in society. What if a quirkless person was a quirkless person of color? Think on that.

There are also heroes of color that exist in the show, and racist caricatures of people of color.

[Image ID: Pro Hero: Native with a shocked expression and some sweat dripping down his face. End Image ID]

This fucker right here.

The BNHA universe has existing racism in and out of canon, seeing as the black/brown characters are underrated outside of the show, and microaggressed within the show.

PART 3: Kacchan vs Deku 3: How Did Deku Being Quirkless Affect Their Relationship And Why?

The line "not all men are created equal" really stuck with me while writing and thinking about this meta. Deku has understood and worked through social dynamics and understandings since he was four years old. He's understood that since he's quirkless, people with quirks hold power over him that he can't defend himself against. He understands this, and chooses to roll with the punches.

Bakugou also very much understands how social dynamics work, and chooses to use it to his advantage. He bullies Deku as a boast of power rather than a boast of privileged. It's been drilled into young Katsuki's head that quirkless people are weak, and that he is strong, His teachers are seen encouraging this behavior and the adults around him tend to not view him as a person, but as an existing beam of potential. Propaganda probably exists even in his Sunday cartoons. The strongest people he looks up to all have quirks, and he makes that correlation of quirk = strong at a very young age. He learns that quirkless ≠ strong. A part of me feels like this is intentional.

Izuku being quirkless would put him at the bottom of the food chain, in a sense, and anyone who had a quirk would be listened to more than he ever would. Izuku learned that not all men are equal because of the inherent power dynamics that come with having the ability to fly, or create explosions, or use fucking fire and ice on command, because he realizes he will never be stronger than Kacchan (at least for now). Even Izuku's idols who he considered to be strong and amazing and admirable were people with quirks. People with power over him.

When Izuku got OFA, the playing field shifted, and Katsuki was afraid and confused. Just because Izuku got a quirk, that doesn't mean Katsuki's view on quirkless people changed. We don't know if it did because its never addressed. He has made significant character development and is working to atone with Deku, but would that still happen if Deku had stayed quirkless? We don't know.

PART 4: Conclusion

The BNHA fandom has a lot of views on how qbd might work, but these are just my thoughts. These are all my opinions and if you'd like to add something feel free to! I just hate the fact that qbd is being compared to actual racism when that just doesn't apply and wanted to weigh in my two cents. Qbd, in my opinion, is all about power dynamics and how easily that can be abused.

#bnha #boku no hero academia #my hero acadamia #bnha meta #izuku midoriya #bakugou katsuki #this is my first time making a meta lmao #mha #pinned it bc im proud of this

[brooklynboysficrecs]

Ria’s Top 10 Shrinkyclinks Fics

I will admit this isn’t my preferred AU -- I won’t immediately jump on a fic just because it’s pre-serum Steve and WS Bucky. I gotta like the plot, or the premise, or be really, really intrigued by the tags, but to be fair, that’s how I am with everything that isn’t Modern Bucky and Cap Steve, so. That being said, I have read some truly fantastic shrinkyclinks stories, and I do very much love Steven “Fight Me” Rogers at his scrappiest. And these fics also tend to feature protective!Bucky which is another personal favorite of mine. Oh, but also: shrinkyclinks generally refers to pre-serum Steve with actual Winter Soldier Bucky, but a lot of people use the tag just to imply body types, and when they say WS Bucky they mean he’s all huge and muscled and sometimes has a metal arm, though that isn’t required. That’s the definition I’m going with as well, so hopefully nothing’s confusing!

1. If Wishing Made It So by leveragehunters. Before I get into anything about the actual fic, let me say this: leveragehunters is probably my favorite stucky writer. Like, hands-down, I read almost everything they write, and they’re big into fantasy stories, which is a great bonus for me personally. So, so, so many good shrinkyclinks fics by them (Even Underneath the Waves, a mermaid AU that features equal amounts of pre- and post-serum Steve, and A-mage-ing Grace with mage Steve are two of my other favorites, and they would’ve been on the list, but I try not to put more than one story per author, ya know? And IWMIS kinda wins out above the others for me, so). This story features jinn!Bucky who finds himself in the baffled hands of Steve Rogers, who is perfectly prickly and stubborn and good. Bucky’s got a terrible past with humans in general (and Hydra in particular, what a shocker) that he and Steve have to overcome as their relationship progresses, but that progression is frankly beautiful to watch unfold. I come back to this story time and time again because of how much I love these versions of Steve and Bucky getting to know one another, learning to trust each other, supporting each other through the worst the world has to throw at them. Plus, there’s a few more stories in this series if you get as hooked as I am, which is always great!!

2. Roots Have Grown by AustinB. I remember reading this and just... completely feeling what Bucky is going through. Not everything -- he’s an agoraphobic veteran, and I can’t relate to either of those, really, but he’s so... awkward about his crush on Steve. And that’s -- that’s relatable to me. But it’s precious, really, how he tries to help Steve even though he’s afraid to actually meet him initially; he becomes Steve’s sort of... anonymous benefactor? Guardian angel with money? Like, it’s definitely a sugar daddy type deal originally but I doubt Bucky would describe it like that. I don’t know, it’s cute, though, and I loved seeing Bucky opening up to Steve as they became closer. 

3. Through The Woods by VenusMonstrosa, alby_mangroves. Okay, hear me out: werewolves. I fucking love werewolves in fiction; I mean, not really the romance novels you’ll see in the grocery store, but. Werewolf mythology is one of my favorite things, so seeing it in fanfiction almost always manages to lure me in. And I was so not disappointed with this story! Steve’s living alone in a cabin in the woods, which of course sounds like the opening to a horror movie, but here it leads to love. Werewolf Bucky is both charming and terrifying, to a degree, he’s a wolf, but he and Steve are fantastic together. This is another story that goes in on the trust aspect of their relationship and I for one am a big fan of that. There’s some violence, minor character death and the like, but it’s definitely not undeserved so. If you can handle that (and the sex, because there is sex in this) then I highly recommend this one!

4. The Joy of Little Things by obsessivereader, Sealcat. And so we move from werewolves to dragons. Yup. Dragons. Another of my beloved mythical creatures that I obsessed over when I was kid. Bucky’s capable of shifting into a human in this, but primarily he’s a big ol’ dragon that surprisingly doesn’t want to eat the scrawny sacrifice from the local village. Steve ends up working for Bucky, instead, and from there hilarity ensues. Steve’s obviously wary of Bucky, but Bucky isn’t at all what he’d been expecting, and they grow closer the longer Steve’s staying in Bucky’s caves. There are a couple of stories with Dragon!Bucky, but this is my personal favorite; it’s cute and heart-warming and, well. I just really like it. 

5. I Just Want to Love You in My Own Language by agetwellcard, inediblesushi. So this one has Cap!Bucky (Bucky!Cap?) but again, sometimes it’s more about how Bucky looks rather than his role as the Winter Soldier. Anyway, I remember my biggest take away from this story was how adorable Bucky was in his quest to win the affections of sassy Nurse Steve, who patches him up after missions and is probably playing hard to get. Bucky uses terrible pick-up lines, absolutely awful, and he is completely unashamed of that fact. Which is, as I said, adorable. Steve, initially, does not agree with my assessment, but he gets there eventually. After some requisite drama, of course.

6. Tint & Shade by forestofbabel. Oh, god, this one hurt me, I remember that pretty clearly. Bucky is the Winter Soldier in this, and Steve is a 21st century art therapist who just so happens to resemble his late grandfather, Captain Joseph Rogers, who fought in -- you guessed it -- WWII. Like I said in the intro, if I really like the premise of something I’ll usually read it regardless of the configuration of pre-/post-serum Steve and pre-serum/WS Bucky, and this was definitely one of the fics I got into for that reason. Having actual WS Bucky interact with a modern pre-serum Steve is always interesting, given how much they don’t have in common, generally (there isn’t even really the veteran status that modern Bucky sometimes has in fics), and it’s a journey to see how and why they connect. Having Steve resemble his WWII era grandfather caught my attention, and the fic itself made me grateful that I decided to go for it in the first place. This is another one where is trust is key to their relationship, considering the mental/emotional state Bucky is in at the beginning. Very good story overall!

7. Fourth Floor by dirtybinary, mithborien, picoalloe. So dirtybinary has written some amazing stucky fics, which is why I was so excited when I saw this being posted initially (a few years ago, but still). There’s magic! Mystery! Suspense! Some NatSharon! Looking this over, I’m wondering if I should’ve saved it for the Urban Fantasy list I wanna do (and If Wishing Made It So, if I’m being honest) but I do like it for the shrinkyclinks list. The writing is great, the characterization of Steve and Bucky is great, and like, they live in what is essentially a magical apartment complex, so what’s better than that? 

8. my heart tells me you are lonely, too by FanGirling. Alright, so I read this one as it was being published, and the slow burn about killed me. You know, in a good way, though. Bucky lives in Steve and his mother’s apartment building, trying to figure out where to go with his life now that he’s broken free of Hydra and gotten his autonomy back. He’s obviously wary, skittish, but he takes a liking to Sarah Rogers when she reaches out to befriend him, surprised anyone wants to be near him let alone take the time to get to know him. Steve... is not so easily sold on Bucky. And I’m not gonna spoil anything here, but the shit these two go through is intense, and I cried a lot during this fic, sometimes out of frustration because they’re both ridiculous about their feelings (of course Bucky’s fears are valid, the man has been through literal hell, but also I was internally screaming a little as Bucky continually talked himself out of getting closer to Steve.) I wanted to wrap the both of them in about thirty blankets for pretty much the entire length of the fic. God. They’re just -- they’re so incredibly sweet in this one, once they work past their issues (Bucky and Steve are both more than a little messed up from their respective circumstances, but they make it work). Mind the tags on this one, also, especially because there is a chapter that deals with attempted sexual assault against Steve (obviously not with Bucky!), but Bucky handles the situation before anything truly nasty happens, that I can promise. 

9. Local Raccoon Befriends Angry Chihuahua by charlesdk. This is yet another author I really love; they have a fantastic farmer!Steve/Modern!WS!Bucky story that I love to bits, as well as other great fics. But anyway, this one. The title sold me the second I saw it, honestly, I can’t even pretend that wasn’t the deciding factor in me reading this. I don’t think I can really do any better than the summary in explaining why I recommend it; feisty tiny Steve and lovestruck grumpy Bucky are a winning combination in my book. This one does feature the boys dealing with homophobia and ableism, though I can’t recall how severe it is. So I’d just mind the tags, and if you’re alright with them, thoroughly enjoy this story. 

10. The Road to Hell is Paved with Tony’s Good Intentions by pinlilli. Bucky as a mail-order Russian bride. That’s the detail that pretty much demanded I click on this fic, and oh my god, it was even better than I ever could’ve expected. Tony, in a bid to help Steve get over his awful ex-boyfriend (fuck Brock Rumlow in every universe, honestly), literally orders him a husband -- in the form of beefy James Barnes, who is a fucking gem and I will not hear one bad word against him. He does chores, it’s lovely and adorable, and you will definitely fall just as hard as Steve does. There’s some canon-typical violence in this one that relates to James’ past, but nothing super graphic as far as I remember. Again, Rumlow is a dick and should be treated as such, but he’s hardly the most important part of this fic and I urge everyone to take a look at it if they’re as intrigued by Bucky being a mail-order husband as I was. 

#stucky #stevebucky #steve rogers #bucky barnes #captain america #winter soldier #chris evans #sebastian stan #fic rec #shrinkyclinks #top 10

[cardentist]

this isn’t a proper discourse post, I Agree with a lot of what the op said but there’s specific things about it that get under my skin in a way that makes me want to talk about it, but I don’t want to engage with that post both because I don’t want to speak over the point that’s being made and frankly because I don’t want to be misinterpreted because of the point that’s being made in it.

so for context, I’ll just say that it was a long post about how a lack of engagement with women characters in fandom spaces is tied to misogyny. just be aware that I’m responding to something specific and not criticisms of this in general. (feel free to dm me if you want to see the post for yourself)

the rest of this is going to be rambly and a bit unfocused, so I want to get this out the door right at the top: it is not actually someone’s moral obligation to engage with or create fan content. all other points aside, what this amounts to is labeling people as bigoted for either not creating or engaging with content that you want to see, and while the individual may or may not be a bigot it’s not actually anyone’s job to tailor their fandom experience to cater to you. 

fandom is not activism. it’s not Wrong to point out that a lack of content about women in fandom is likely indicative of the influence of our misogynistic society. and suggesting that people examine their internalized biases isn’t just fine, it’s something that everyone should be doing all the time. but saying that it is literally someone’s “responsibility” to “make an effort” by consuming content about women or they’re bigoted is presenting the consumption of fan content as a moral litmus test that you pass and fail not by how you engage with content but by not engaging with all of the Correct content. 

judging people’s morality based on what characters they read meta for or look at fanart for is, a mistake. it Can Be Indicative of internalized biases but it is not, in and of itself, a moral failing that has to be corrected.

if you want more content to be created about women in fandom then you do it by spreading content about women in fandom, not by guilting people into engaging with it by saying that they’re bigots if they don’t. you encourage creation Through creation.

okay, now to address what Mainly set me off to inspire this post.

this post specifically went out of it’s way to present misogyny as the only answer for why this problem exists in fandom spaces. and while I absolutely agree that it’s a Factor, they left absolutely no room for nuance which included debunking “common excuses.” which, as you can probably guess, contained the things that ticked me off.

first off, you can’t judge that someone is disconnected from women in general based on their fandom consumption because the sum total of their being is not available on tumblr. 

people don’t always bear their souls in fandom spaces. just because they don’t actively post about a character or Characters doesn’t mean that they see them as lesser or that they don’t think about them. the idea that you can tell what a person’s moral beliefs are not based on what they’ve said or done but based on whether they engage with specific characters in a specific way in a specific space can Only work on the assumption that they engage with that space in a way that expresses the entirety of who they are or even their engagement with that specific media.

what I engage with on ao3 is different from what I engage with on tumblr, youtube, twitter, my friend’s dms, and my own head. people are going to engage with social media and fandom spaces specifically differently for different reasons. you can’t assume what the other parts of their lives look like based on this alone. 

second off, there can be other factors at play that influence people’s specific engagement with a fandom.

they specifically brought up the magnus archives as an example of a show with well written women. which while absolutely true, does Not mean that misogyny is the only option for why people wouldn’t engage with content about them as often. for me personally? a lot of fan content is soured because of how it presents jon. I relate to him very heavily as a neurodivergent and traumatized person, and he faces a Lot of victim blaming and dehumanization in the writing. sasha and martin are more or less the only main characters that Aren’t guilty of this, and sasha was out of the picture after season 1.

while this affects my enjoyment of fan content for these characters To Some Extent on it’s own (I love georgie, I love her a lot, but I can’t forget that she looked at someone and told them that they were better off dead because they couldn’t “choose” to not be abused), the bigger issue is fan content that Specifically doesn’t address the victim blaming and ableism as what it is, even presenting it as just Correct. 

this isn’t exclusive to the women in the show by any means, this is exactly why I avoid a lot of content about tim, but it affects a lot of the women who are main characters. that isn’t the Only reason, there’s more casual ableism and things that tear him down for other reasons (the prevalent theory that elias passed up on sasha because he’s afraid of how she’s More Competent In Jon In Every Single way. which comes with the unfortunate implications of jon being responsible for his own trauma because he just wasn’t competent enough to avoid it) but that’s the main one that squicks me out.

of course not all fan content does this, and I Do engage with content about these characters, but sometimes it’s easier to just stick with content that centers on my comfort character because it’s more likely to look at his character with the nuance required to see that it is victim blaming and ableism. 

it’s not enough to say that the characters are well rounded or well written and conclude that if someone isn’t consuming or creating content about them then it has to be due to misogyny and nothing else.

there’s also just like, the Obvious answer. two most prominent characters are two men that are in a canonical gay relationship, which draws in queer men/masc people on it’s own but the centering of their othering and trauma Particularly draws in traumatized queer people that are starved for content. georgie and melanie are both fleshed out characters in and of themselves, but their relationship with each other doesn’t have nearly as much direct screen time. and daisy and basira have a lot more screen time together and about each other, but their relationship is very intentionally non-canon because of its role as a commentary on cop pack mentality.

people are More Likely to create content for the more prominent relationship in the show and be drawn into the fandom through that relationship in the first place. I have no doubt that there Are misogynistic fans of the show, but focusing on the relationship and the characters that make you happy isn’t and indication that you’re one of them.

which brings us to the big one, the one that sparked me into writing this in the first place (and the last that I have time for if I’m being honest). the “common excuses” section in general is, extremely dismissive obviously but there’s only one section that genuinely upsets me. 

without copying and pasting what they said directly, it essentially boils down to this: while they recognize that gay and trans men are “allowed” to relate to men, they’re still Men which makes them misogynistic. Rather than acknowledge Why gay and trans men would engage with fan-content specifically that caters to them they present it as a given that it’s 100% due to misogyny anyways. they present queer men engaging with content about themselves as them treating women like they’re “unworthy of attention,” calling it a “patriarchal tendency” that they have to unlearn.

being gay and trans does not mean that you’re immune to misogyny, being a woman doesn’t even mean that you’re immune to misogyny, but that’s engaging in bad faith in a way that really puts a bad taste in my mouth. 

queer men aren’t just like, Special Men that have Extra Bonus Reasons to be relate to boys, they’re people who are more likely to Need fandom spaces to explore facets of themselves. and while you can Relate to any character, it feels good to be able to explore those aspect with characters that resemble you or how you see yourself.

when I first started actively seeking out fandom spaces in middle school I engaged with content about queer men more or less exclusively. at this point I had no concept of what trans people were, and wouldn’t begin openly considering that I might be a trans person until high school. I knew that I’d be happier as a gay man before I knew I could be a gay man, and that’s affected my relationship with fandom forever. 

I engage with most things pretty casually, reblogging meta and joke posts when I see them, but what I go out of my way to engage with is largely an expression of my gender identity and sexuality. I project myself onto a comfort character and then I Consume content for them because that was how I was able to express myself before I knew that I needed to. it’s not that girl characters aren’t “worthy” of me relating to them, it’s that I specifically go to certain fandom spaces to express and work through my gender and sexuality. that’s what I use those fandom spaces For.

I imagine that I’ll need this crutch less when I’m allowed to transition and if I ever find a relationship situation that works out for me. but also like, why should I? it’s not actually hurting anyone for me to explore my gender and sexuality through fanfic until the end of time. nor does it hurt anyone for me to focus on my comfort characters. 

fandom is personal comfort and entertainment, not a moral obligation. people absolutely should engage with women in media and real life with more nuance and energy than they do, but fandom spaces are not the place to police or judge that. 

#discourse #I've been writing and rewriting this for 4 and a half hours instead of going to bed before 9 am #I already know that absolutely no one is going to read this so I don't know why I did this to myself #also I couldn't find a place to fit this in so I'm just gonna say it here #sometimes people just engage with fandom based on characters that they find attractive #and if that means boys then that means boys #it doesn't have to be more complicated than that

[scarlet--wiccan]

I don’t think Wanda’s mutant status actually matters nearly as much as it should for Billy and Tommy especially, mutants are born with their powers (though usually dormant), Wanda and pietro (currently) got their powers from the HE but the twins were seemingly born mutants. Either she made them mutants subconsciously bc she believed she was, or they’re the mutant children of a mutate (like Franklin Richards). Not defending the retcon and DEFINITELY not defending the way Wanda’s been treated and how weird that makes Tommy’s relationship status but I don’t think non mutant Wanda necessarily means Billy and Tommy aren’t. They should clarify, where Tommy’s powers even come from if pietro got his from THE especially confused me, but usually powered kids of mutates have been considered mutants.

That being said it probably doesn’t matter bc Sc*rletVisi*n is probably going to make all of them mutants point blank so the comics will shift to accommodate that. Apparently Peter from the xmen is going to come in and bring mutants somehow which sounds horrible (and though ATJ still shouldn’t have been playing pietro as a white man he was at least semi recognizable as quicksilver from the comics and Jewish. I hate xmcu quicksilver A LOT more than mcu QS even though neither is good) and ridiculous but the leak has gotten a lot of crap right so far.

I’m assuming the plan is to retcon the retcon with this krakoa event but they’re waiting until the big tv reveal because unfortunately the movies/shows are their priority now. I think the only good think is that krakoa seems so far divorced from any status quo (mcu or otherwise) that making the maximoffs mutants (again) will have to be completely divorced from the mcu so there’s a chance the storyline might not be terrible? I don’t want the whitewashed maximoffs to have any more of an impact on the comic characters, even though I know that’s impossible.

Well, for one thing, they just retconned Franklin as a "false" mutant, too. I'm not saying that was a good choice, but if we're talking about the current status quo, he definitely doesn't hold up as an example. The definition of "mutant" has shifted over the years, but, generally speaking, when we talk about X-Men mutants, we're talking about people with a specific genetic feature, the X-gene. I suppose that a child of a human mutate who inherits superhuman or abnormal genetic traits from their parents would be, by definition, a mutant, but if they don't have the X-gene, it's not the same thing. Are there a lot of other characters like Franklin, who were allegedly born with the X-gene because their parents are mutates? Because I can't think of any off the top of my head.

Anyways, this is a hard point to debate because the 2015 retcons were poorly executed and poorly justified-- it's, like, impossible to retroactively view Wanda and Pietro as non-mutants when, in the past, their mutant status was an integral part of their characters and a key plot point in several major events. House of M, Son of M, and AvX literally don't make sense if they aren't mutants-- Pietro was depowered by the "no more mutants" spell, and Hope was able to mimic Wanda's powers. Neither of these things would be possible if they weren't real mutants. The explanation can't just be that Wanda believed herself to be a mutant, and so her magic functioned accordingly-- if that's how it's supposed to work, the reveal in Axis never could have happened the way it did. Do you see what I mean? I'm running circles around myself trying to make it make sense.

That aside, Billy and Tommy's status as mutants has always been a little nebulous-- I don't think they're ever clearly identified as such in any Young Avengers titles, although they were definitely described as mutants in some of their other appearances-- Secret Invasion always comes to mind. You could argue that their powers are a factor of their magical resurrection, rather than being genetic, but, as I've said in the past, I do think that the twins are genetically continuous to their original incarnations. More to the point, their "mutations" match Wanda and Pietro's almost exactly. This is taken as proof of their connection to Wanda, so, based on that significance, I'm inclined to say the nature of their powers should also match, mutant or not. Plus, don't you think it'd be a weird coincidence if they had the same abilities, but from a different source?

[As a disclaimer, I do tend to think of/refer to the entire Maximoff family as mutants when I'm not directly addressing the retcons. This is because they were written as such for decades, so they are still mutant characters within most of the existing material.]

__________________________________

I have heard some of those leaks and rumors, and I agree that if the Axis retcon is going to be reversed, even partially, it will probably happen if and when MCU!Wanda comes to be known as a mutant. As I've said, I'm not invested in that character and I don't think there's any way, at this point, to fix the problems that she represents, so I don't really care where she ends up in the movies. I will say that I'm not terribly worried about the films influencing Wanda's appearance or characterization in the comics-- even after the Axis retcon, which was clearly motivated by IP concerns related to the movies, the changes she went through had nothing to do with MCU!Wanda and actually differentiated them even further.

That said, while Hickman's treatment of Wanda may be a red herring or set-up for some big reveal, I don't trust him, or Howard, with the character in any circumstance. More importantly, I care less about Wanda being a mutant than I care about the way Hickman, like Remender before him, is carrying on with the worst, most offensive aspects of her mid-2000s characterization. The levels of ableism and misogyny House of M, Disassembled, etc are too great to ignore. It is irresponsible for contemporary writers to refer back to those stories without acknowledging those problems, or at least attempting to shift the narrative for the better.

It's also really hurtful to me, as someone who sees their identity and history reflected in this character, to see her painted as pseudo-genocidal, or a race/class traitor, or a self-hating minority. Wanda has only become that character because gadjekane writers have chosen to project those those notions onto the image of a Roma woman. That sucks, and it sucks even more that so many fans, and industry pros, turn their ire onto the character, rather than reckoning with the real problem.

#robintext #wanda maximoff #x-men #scarlet witch #tommy shepherd

[calamity-bean]

oh miss calamity, my beautiful queen. i was wondering (if you haven’t already!) if you could write a meta about why yen wants her womb/a baby so bad? personally i think it’s because she “wants everything” and that ability is something she doesn’t have, not that she necessarily wants to be a mother, and she has lived so long and that’s something she hasn’t done yet? but i love your mind and would love to hear your perspective! thank you ☺️

Thanks for the ask! It’s an interesting topic, and a potentially very complicated one, I think, because Yennefer herself seems to me to have a lot of complicated and sometimes contradictory drives.

I should start by saying I haven’t read the books yet (*re-re-rechecks my place in the library’s request queue*) or played the games. While I gather that Yen’s infertility also features in the novels, I don’t know how their treatment of the topic compares to the show’s, so I’m coming at this purely in the context of the Netflix series. Apologies to book/game fans who undoubtedly have a more comprehensive understanding of her character than I do.

With that said, I agree with you that Yennefer’s desire to have a child is about more than just, y’know… having a child. Beyond motherhood per se, I think it reflects a more general sense of longing that she’s hoping to satisfy by achieving this one specific thing. I think part of it is indeed that it’s something she doesn’t have (and has been told she can’t have), not because a child would be a novelty but simply because Yen likes, in general, to demonstrate agency over her own life and choices; but on a deeper level, I wonder if what she’s really longing for — the core desire she’s trying to fulfill here — might be connection. A departure from the isolation that she has, to some extent, purposely imposed on herself, and a relationship that is based on loving and being loved as a person rather than as an object of beauty or provider of power.

I don’t fault Yen’s self-isolation, or her ambitious nature in general. When we meet Yen in 1.02, she is abused, unloved, poor, perceived as ugly — and utterly without control over her own circumstances, leaving her dependent on the very man who mistreats and then sells her. Is it any wonder that she wants so fiercely to be powerful, to be beautiful, “to be seen and adored with everyone watching” (episode 1.03)? I don’t think this comes down to vanity; I think it reflects a desire to not need to be dependent on anyone else ever again. Look at the way she rejects Istredd’s domestic fantasies about their future together; the way she rejects Tissaia “throwing her a lifeline” in 1.05; the way she rejects Geralt’s help with the djinn! “You heroic protector, noble dog, permitting my success so long as you command it yourself!” We often talk about wanting power like it’s a negative thing; it connotes greed, vanity, a destructive, immoral acquisitiveness. But Yen prizes power over herself and her surroundings because she knows too well what it is to be powerless. Everything she does, she wants to be able to do by herself.

And on the surface, she succeeds. She makes herself into the sort of person who stands apart from all others; who can get pretty much anything or anyone she wants and need depend on no one else in turn…

Yennefer, 1.07: “And it was fun to be wanted. The object of desire. After where I came from, I lapped it up. But they all loved the power that came with my position at court. Not my power.”

…But by 1.04, Yen’s found that — as is often the case in life — the things she thought would make her happy have not. Her work as a court mage is desperately unfulfilling, and I think Istredd had a point when he said that “no amount of power or beauty will ever make [her] feel worthy of either” (1.03), because Yen feels that the “love” her beauty and power earn her is shallow and misplaced — i.e., that “love” is not really for her. People love what she can give them … but what about her, as a person? Do they even see her as a person at all? Or do they see only the impressive persona she constructed in order to become who she thought she wanted to be?

And then Queen Kalis shoves a baby into her arms.

“To this baby, I am the whole world,” Kalis says (1.04), and despite Kalis’s own dissatisfaction with motherhood, I think Yen is struck by the idea of being so important to someone in such an all-encompassing way — not as a useful, desirable sorceress, but simply as an ordinary person in an ordinary familial relationship. Though she initially seems a little alarmed to be asked to hold a baby, her willingness to ultimately risk her life for the child contrasts sharply with Kalis’s willingness to sacrifice it for herself. For all her talk of how harsh the world is, Yen is not as callous as she might act. Tough, yes, and sometimes a tad cruel, but nowhere near heartless. I think of the way she interacts with the girls at Aretuza in 1.07 — how she teaches them and tries to warn them from making the same mistakes she feels she did — and I see in Yen someone who does want to care for someone other than herself.

There’s definitely a reactionary element at work here too. Yen knowingly gave up her womb in order to get the things she thought would fulfill her. They failed to live up to her expectations, so now she resents having been asked to pay that price. So to some extent, this is rebellion — a stubborn desire to spite Aretuza for demanding that price and to prove that she can, as you say, have everything. “They took my choice,” she tells Geralt in 1.06; “I want it back.” This definitely fits with her need for independence and control over her own life, but I think the desire for genuine connection — and to choose with whom she is connected — is still a big factor. I think this relates to why she’s so devastated to learn that Geralt may have bound them together magically through the djinn: in her eyes, the magic removes all of her agency from the equation, making her feel that this relationship she thought was based on choice and genuine connection, rather than in any kind of obligation or transaction, was “not because of anything real or true.” And when she warns the girls at Aretuza about infertility, isolation is the primary consequence she describes:

Yennefer, 1.07: “The ability to create life, real life? They take that from you. And then send you out so the only family, the only loyalty you have is to them.”

Yen is proudly self-sufficient — but feels isolated. She doesn’t want to need anyone — but she wants to be needed, and not merely in a way that means being admired as a useful object rather than truly seen as a person, nor in a way that requires her to compromise her own independence or personhood in order to suit the wishes of others. And like anyone, she wants to feel that her life has had a purpose, that she’s done something meaningful with her time. She once “believed that it would all be worth it” — that her work as a court mage would be her “legacy.” Would motherhood —  or, more broadly, family; or, more broadly still, meaningful personal connection — fulfill her the way magic has not?

…I don’t know.

It’s interesting — I’ve seen some posts on this aspect of Yennefer’s characterization, but much of what I’ve seen has come at it from an out-of-universe standpoint: i.e., “How do we, the audience, feel about the fact that this character was written with this motivation?” I think good points have been made about how centering a female character’s arc around motherhood plays into stale, gendered tropes, and about how Yen’s infertility (and other aspects of her arc) potentially reflect misogyny and ableism, etc. And I think those issues are worth discussing, though I’m not really going to get into them here, given that I’m clearly long-winded enough as it is.

But even from a purely in-universe perspective, there’s irony here, right, in that this whole theme is all still wrapped up in the idea of women as vessels: vessels of children, vessels of sexual desire, vessels of power. “And even when we’re told we’re special, as I was, as you would’ve been, we’re still just vessels for them to take and take until we’re empty and alone” (1.04). Yennefer resents her role in life and feels she’s only loved because she’s useful/desirable to others — yet Kalis, too, resents her own role and feels that it’s Yennefer who is looked at “for who you are, not for what you can give them.” Yen is not Kalis, and not every woman — not every person — wants or needs the same things … But in such a patriarchal setting, is a woman’s choice basically limited to what kind of vessel she wants to be perceived as, rather than whether she wants to be a vessel at all? And is the desire for a child merely another reflection of how much Yennefer craves external validation — to be seen and adored — despite how much she also wishes to be self-sufficient? Is the critical idea here not that Yen would be the child’s whole world (as Kalis put it), but the child would be Yennefer’s whole world — a meaningful vessel into which to pour her heart?

I don’t know! There’s a lot going on here thematically, and a lot going on in Yen’s motivations. All I can really say in conclusion is that I hope I made a lick of sense in trying to untangle it and that I haven’t completely missed the mark.

#i dont know if this is right but there sure is 1500 words of it #the witcher #yennefer #anya cholatra #witcher netflix #meta #my meta #asks #op #Anonymous

[tammyhybrid21]

Do you think that in the Tadeo Jones universe, some people (average or rich people) think living mummies aren't persons but some creatures they can capture and claim as their own 'cuz they have no rights? (as mentioned by Tad in Movie 2) Kind of like the Apex's view of denizens in IT. I think this could be adressed in Tad 3. But I'll be sad because Mummy is going to find the hard way that for powerful people, his feelings and opinions doesn't matter (Twice, if we count the Spanish conquista)

Ohhhh man!

I have been-- stewing over how best to answer this since I saw it yesterday, because part of me has IDEAS-- the other part has a rant that has kind of been building for a while in general when you just examine the movies and the setting and even the actual community represented in reality(that being Archaeologists not-- well)

And LOOK-- I have TEA!

Frustrated, frustrated tea regarding other aspects of how this all could play out that basically boils down to the one major issue that a lot of those groups has is the issue of "But WE all know!" and the we've boxed this in already.

Which-- Debatably, Tad isn't the only one with some issues... But Sara has-- at least insofar as her reactions to Mummy in movie 2, come to terms past her more nebulous in concept repeated line.

"Mummies can't be alive, it's a contradiction in terms" 

Which-- actually might be an issue that's just on the question of the life/death binary more than it is actually a question of whether someone is human/a person or not. And we ALL know she's definitely got Major Respect over Tad--

Like, I will write a proper analysis over their "Mummy gives advice/pep talk" scenes later-- but--

Sara doesn't just take it and run how Tadeo does-- and she doesn't get hyped about it either. It's soft and subtle and just ARGH--

--

Which, okay beside the point, but I have-- so much on this idea of how people view Mummy-- Because let's for a moment consider what Tad actually says-- in answer to Mummy's "What is with you?" and I want to also talk on what people tend to associate with and call monsters... and how... that might also factor into this whole mess.

"Listen you're a mummy, you scare people. In my world you're a zombie!"

Which-- okay, on the surface this is just an on the nose point about how well, Mummy is undead. Ahahah, the living dead and I suppose living mummies are their own form of zombie-- although really it's more like they're cousins as zombies are usually more... in process of decay while mummies are preserved/petrified... Buuuut in any case... not the point here really.

But rather...

Let's talk about how "Monster Movies" come in here. And what zombies tend to be synonymous with nowadays. You know-- for the most part. Mindless, brainless, sometimes killers though not always-- But ultimately-- Does... anyone actually watch zombie shows for in-depth exploration of zombies ever anymore? Aside a few exceptions, and same in games-- Zombies are relegated to just brainless/mindless monsters.

Which--

On the other side of that-- monsters.

Tad never quite uses that word but--

"First, you're not human"

Mummies-- are monsters. In stories and fiction. Used to scare, used to awe, used to add scenery dressing, spooky, freaky, creepy-- and when they're not-- well it's rare. But if they're not the villains, they're not "human". Which think about that for a moment, in all the monster stories we have but a few where the monsters aren't outright put in that position.

But a monster is usually in a story put into one role and box. And if they're not outright there just to be spooky, or the whole new misunderstood monster trope-- which well, that's a whole other thing. But we all know the usual "monster shtick".

Violent, scary, simple, dumb, driven by base impulses, nonhuman, Very, very often as lesser, other, and something to be feared/hunted/destroyed.

And while modern day does move away from that--

ISSUES still prevail.

And I have-- just got to aside here, but like, thinking on this but-- the Phone Mummy sign outside of Tad's window as a child has some... other weird things. Because as a wild aside, my dumb brain has decided to A - B link this with a series I watched on television from 2005-2007

Because of THIS stupid Mummy Scam Artist character. And it's dumb, has nothing to do with the issue of mummies(and other potential beings and creatures of myth and legend) having less rights. But this whole phone billboard-- with the Mummy, it's legit right up this character's kind of scam alley and I may or may not one day just rewatch his two villain episodes to get his personality clear in my head JUST to do a dumb crossover.(And for nostalgia, but that's not news)

BUT--

Advertising does tell us some things already. In how people possibly think and could respond/react.

Yet still-- there is something more I think that we're missing in this conversation on how people will potentially treat the discovery of a living mummy. Or really any supernatural being. If not with fear(which look-- fear the unknown, fear different, fear of monsters), arguably those who're intrigued, interested could be far, far worse.

Also-- I just have, much tea on other responses for even those who might briefly "respect" him. Because look-- Mummy would be a priceless artefact in a way, treasure and discovery all on his own-- BUT also a new potential source of information of a culture that for the most part has been lost and erased by history.

People could and would ask questions.

Whiiich is where I have doubts about how they will accept the answers to those questions. Because here's the thing, for all the Archaeology community loves to act as if they let discoveries speak for themselves, and even I suppose historians-- There are just-- so many times I watch and listen to documentaries and get SO FRUSTRATED-- because they're stubborn IDIOTS, who actually refuse to take in the evidence in front of them of any truths outside of what they're SO SURE has to be the TRUTH!

For those who speak of learning all about history and it's secrets, they're so damn high and mighty to reject anything that doesn't immediately fit with already established "facts". It must be an anomaly, aliens, can't be what we're actually seeing right--

And well even people today interacting-- Like-- I've seen people try to correct someone on the pronunciation of their own name before.

So I am almost certain there would be at least one idiot who'd be all high and mighty and just-- Mummy has LIVED it. It's his culture he grew up in and some idiot speaking over him saying his lying, which I just-- I am certain would happen(but probably not in canon because who would DARE?!)-- Just "EXCUSE ME?!"

Which is it's own kind of disrespect and hell, crash Tad's pillars again. Yes please!

Which... on that account--

I kiiiind of want to talk about how Tad needs a smack on this... and that wake up to the truths of the high and mighty and bloody prideful issues of the community. BUT more than that-- I actually want to think about that point you made about how Mummy's supposed transformation in movie 3 comes across and the further themes of this question of humanity and rights is in regards to this whole issue.

Because yeah, there's the issue, front and CENTER.

The question/implication of this resembling Ammut, and implied loss of humanity. Along with the fact that Tad's the likely TRUE CENTER of the curse-- since he's the idiot who opened the sarcophagus in the first place...

WHICH CAN I JUST SAY--

There's a very good possibility in regards to that issue-- potentially having to do with some of Tad's more... subtle issues. Or even the ones that are close to the surface and yet not. I've screamed already on Tadeo's Internalized Ableism... along with some small nods to Mummy's own less severe cast with that but-- This is directly playing into that image of monsters and nonhumanity--

And I could probably add an additional few pages of speculation onto this but--

I actually am... also worried for the pets. If only because uhhh, have you seen the original two Tadeo Jones shorts from before it become movies? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2XxhNMbpE2A & https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoJBzI2AUOw

I mean not assuming anything, but I can definitely believe they wouldn't be above having that threat present at the least.(I mean just that second one... with what I guess is concept-Jeff) Even if Mummy is most definitely going to be the one at the MOST RISK. But with that-- comes the question of humanity.

And while yeah-- I do imagine, all too easily there will be many people more focused on the discovery-- I think there's an interesting mess that Tadeo is going to be FORCED to confront with this-- in how he has that displaced view.

Because here's the weird thing.

I've kind of mentioned it before but not really expanded or explained very clearly-- but for all of Tad's issues... he cares about Mummy probably more than he even really realizes. It's in small to big things as well. Again-- for all his trash behaviour in movie 2, I do think a lot of it is very, very misplaced attempts at some form of protection...

Which I also really want to at some point make a post that's just...

"Tad's I'm Helping moments and how they made things worse for everyone"

But that's for later... For now...

I kind of want to grab a few things.

"You're already dead, RUN!"

I also actually counted how quickly he ran back to Mummy for this moment, and it's LITERALLY two seconds, from when Mummy collapses to Tadeo's check on him. Also I'd like to mention with this-- he's supposedly tunnel visioning on Sara(and he ruins it within the next scene pretty quickly)

...

And for all they're kind of dumb decisions.

DEBATABLY-- when he's trying to hide Mummy.

"Hide"

Ugh-- BUT Tadeo has a very... complicated issue here really. Because yes-- Tad very much has that nonhuman issue, but he CARES. And then-- there's how the whole Ammut thing feels set and the symbolic meaning there(ALSO INTERESTING SARA SEEMINGLY ISN'T CAUGHT BY THAT). But here's the thing--

With Ammut kiiind of come those scales and the feather.

It's not like that mythology isn't unknown-- but more to the point-- it feels kind of like force Tad to confront his mixed up view. On Mummy's humanity or lack of-- But really as the audience Mummy feels the most human at this point in time-- whiiich we can get into a debate on what even is human nature later-- but--

I am kind of hoping that we get a callout of a number of things regarding Tad's behaviour.

With some primary focus on this dynamic between him and Mummy and really seeing how he responds to that idea that Mummy is nonhuman to really be thrown into full view and scope. And listen...

You cannot cheat the scales.

...

As an aside generally, if he is turning into a form or version of Ammut even if initially the community is a danger because he's a living mummy that creates a whole other issue of how he'd be viewed as a danger due to the role that's possibly growing more and more of an instinct.

But yeah... I will probably now make a more formulated rant on this later, or like, minor expansions on the topic but-- yeah.

I have been CHEWING on these thoughts, ideas and concepts for a while.

With additional tea. Because when people think they know something too often they refuse to see differently.

(Also at some point I am going to make a personal rant on duality verses binary due to insistent terminology issues I have but ugh)

#THybrid Responds #THybrid Jones #Tadeo Jones #Mummy(Tadeo Jones) #Sorry about making this a rant #But I literally mused ALL DAY #So you get 10 pages worth #although I still theoretically have more #because this is a nuanced concept #and I have a lot of feelings #but I don't want to get too deep into some of my theories with movie 3 yet #because plunnies #araminakilla20 #Life and Times of Juniper Lee

[with-a-dash-of-tea]

Writing Mental Illness In Your Novels

Believe it or not, you don’t actually have to have a mental illness to write about it in your novel. Some people are inspired to do so either because a loved one struggles with it or they feel there is a lack of representation of a particular mental illness. Or they are proponents of mental illness and want their audience to feel less alone. 

As for myself, I have bipolar disorder type I and panic disorder, which I was recently diagnosed with. I am not having an easy time right now. I’m rapid cycling, so I swing around between hypomania/mania/mixed states/depression/baseline, and it’s not that fun because I haven’t been able to predict recently how I’m going to be day-to-day. On top of having to deal with anxiety I’m having difficulties getting under control, it’s been a bit of a ride, so writing about mental illness is purely cathartic for me. 

I’m writing a novel currently titled The Seeming Impossibility of Everything with an asexual character who struggles with panic disorder and addiction she’s in denial about. It used to be called The Glorious In-Between and focused strictly on her asexuality with no mental illness involved, other than her best friend struggling with it, but the story evolved, and hopefully this is the one that’s it. 

In any case, if you don’t suffer with the mental illness you’re writing about, research is going to play a big role. NAMI is a great source of information for all of your research. I also recommend reading memoirs and fiction books based around the mental illness you want to include in your novel. Even interviewing people will go a long way in making sure you’re as accurate as possible with representation. 

There is so much stigma surrounding the mentally ill that must also be taken into account. Being able to admit to people you have this thing isn’t easy. I’m open about my mental illnesses, but that’s my personality. I have no problem telling people I have bipolar disorder or panic disorder because I want to be among the voices that are loud. I don’t want to be silent, drowning in shame. 

Now there are things you need to consider when writing a mentally ill character:

1. Unreliable Narrators. Some mental illnesses can create unreliable narrators because of a break in reality, but most of them don’t. I’ve seen some authors write characters who have depression, and they decide to throw in a break with reality for entertainment factor, and it’s downright insulting. You need to do your research about what mental illnesses cause a break in reality because depression or even anxiety usually aren’t it. 

2. Making the Mental Illness More of a Burden on Others Than the Sufferer. This was my biggest problem with the final season of 13 Reasons Why. For one, they threw in out of nowhere that Clay has panic disorder. Granted, people with panic disorder can go years without an attack, but it was obvious this was done more for entertainment than education because Clay’s illness was represented as being more of a burden on others than himself. It was evident in him being called Clay Cray, and the show never indicated how ableist this was or how much more understanding his friends should have been. Ableism is a real thing, yes, but there were no apologies, and Clay was left with the burden of being the bad guy, especially when he “lost it” and grabbed a gun and pointed it at people--which was also problematic in itself and leads me into my next point. 

3. We Are More Likely to Hurt Ourselves Than Others. Clay was made into a character more harmful to others than himself. His blackouts made him into a criminal. He was not representative of what it’s truly like to live with panic disorder. No, I’ve never blacked out. I’m sure it’s terrifying. But panic disorder sufferers are more likely to implode than explode because the symptoms themselves are just that way. Mental illness doesn’t make you into a terrible person. You already have to be a terrible person to begin with, and all mental illness does is reveal that. Writing about mental illness should be about ending the stigma, not contributing to it these days. 

4. Treatment Options. There are a myriad of treatment options your character can have. I have a psychiatrist who just deals in meds with me and I’ll occasionally talk about personal stuff, but as it relates to my illnesses so she knows how to adjust my meds. I also had a therapist who would occasionally do CBT with me. She did family therapy, couple’s therapy, and marriage counseling as well. She has a PhD. You need at least a master’s to be a therapist. So you have a lot of researching to do in this area when choosing what type of treatment you want your character to have. 

5. Psychiatric Hospitals. Any mental illness can wind you up in a psychiatric hospital. Research the laws in each state because if you’re being held against your will, some states have a certain amount of hours before you can be let go. In my state of Georgia, I believe, it’s a 72-hour hold. All psychiatric hospitals are different as well in how they approach treatment and have different units, like adolescents or chemical dependency. Some leave your rooms open all day so you can stay in there in between groups. Some close the rooms down before breakfast and won’t open them again until reflection time or bed time. Some have rooms with their own showers. Some don’t. Some also aren’t as nice. For example, I knew a suicidal patient who, for some reason, was handcuffed when being brought to the unit, even though she claimed she wasn’t a danger to herself or others. And she was chill--much chiller than I was the entire time we were hospitalized (I was manic). So you can get a little creative as long as it’s not outrageous. Again, this is where research is crucial. 

6. Suicide. Suicidal ideation is not something experienced by every single person with mental illness; thus, it is not a requirement in every book. Suicidal ideation is also a diagnosis in itself because it takes a particular toxic chemical stew for someone with mental illness to become suicidal. It isn’t an, ‘Oh, I’m so sick and tired of being depressed, so I think I’ll just kill myself.’ It’s more of a build-up over time of constantly feeling suicidal and depressed at the same time. You can be depressed and never experience suicidal feelings. If you do decide to have a character attempt, it’s also important to note you don’t need to be detailed. It can be triggering for some readers. This is why they removed Hannah’s suicide scene from 13 Reasons Why. Even someone like me, who isn’t so easily brought to her knees because I’ve experienced enough of my own mental illness trauma, felt nauseated and broke down crying when I watched it. 

If you have any questions, especially about my particular illnesses, feel free to message me! 

#writing comunity #writing advice #writing help #writers of tumblr #writeblr

[abuse-culture]

Depression Misconceptions

Our abuse culture is fueled by a misunderstanding of mental health. 

Online I see many people address depression joking with phrases like “serotonin machine broke”. And in serious cases use the hyper medicalised version of depression and mental illnesses in general as just a lack of a neurotransmitter. Either way, they are presenting depression as only a lack of serotonin.  

Mental illness is not the same health struggle as type 1 diabetes and way more complex. Keep in mind even diabetes has other management factors than insulin. Comparing the two as the same or as competition is harmful to everyone.

Mental illness is more affected by environment and life factors than most non-psychological health conditions. Our bodies are complex and our mind cannot be separated from the rest of our body, but mental health is connected to our social-emotional state by treating it like we might a broken arm, heart defect or diabetes.

There is some truth in the idea of depression being only a “sick organ”. There are of course neurological and neurochemical aspects to be considered. The functioning of the Amygdala & Thalamus is altered and the size of the hippocampus are all affected. This was shown in many F-MRI’s, MRI studies. Chemically; Acetylcholine, Dopamine, Norepinephrine, Glutamate & GABA all play a role. Which in itself shows more complex neurobiological levels and shows overlap with PTSD and anxiety on physical and chemical levels.

There are genes linked to depression, but the idea that any depression is purely genetic or generally endogenic is not common. You may see it reported in some places, but the most common belief is that the “depression gene” does not cause depression on its own but instead predisposes you to it. Some studies suggest that possibly 40% of depression in a person may be genetic, but even that shows that 60% is environmental.

This complexity can be exacerbated as there are multiple physiological disorders and health conditions that can induce depressive symptoms due to multiple chemical imbalances and other functions. Chronic low blood pressure, CFS, diabetes, hypercalcemia, hypothyroidism, or vitamin deficiency can all mimic depression. These depressive symptoms can be better by treating the physical chronic health condition if not eliminated.  Disability and chronic illness can be a trigger or layer of depressive disorders by both symptoms of the health condition and as a stressor or trauma that influences depression.

But what is key is that mental health is that layer of social, interpersonal, behavioral, environmental and systemic factors. We have to recognize all of this to understand our mental health and improve our situation.

It stops people considering all the factors that might influence the depression we may be suffering with and it’s always a layered experience.

Examples:

Ableism

Alienation brought on by capitalism

Attachment trauma

Child Abuse

Child Emotional Neglect

Classism

Community Trauma

Death of loved ones

Developmental Traumas

Disabilities & Disabilities

Domestic Violence

Environmental factors (Pollution)

Exposure to the criminal legal system

Global traumas

Homophobia

Incarceration

Intergenerational trauma

Lack of health care

Lack of housing

Lack of hobbies or creative outlets

Lack of social supports for issues like relationships or child care

Negative or toxic relationships

Misogyny

Poor Nutrition

Poverty

Our culture’s lack of emotional inelegance

Racism

Rape

The school system

Sexual Abuse

Spiritual well-being deficits

Substances Abuse Disorder

Your Job

Another common phrase is “if you can’t make a serotonin store-bought is a fine” way of addressing depression. They tend to be moderately effective, even the big headlines saying; “The drugs do work” or “antidepressants proved better than placebo”. The studies are not nearly definitive, including admitting the drugs only work moderately well. Many studies show inconclusive evidence or even show almost no evidence that antidepressants have a major curative power for depression, with high relapse rates and rates that are equal or lesser to other forms of treatment.

I’m not against them but we need to be cautious of and more informed. For example, Understand antidepressants aren’t just concentrated serotonin you aren’t taking serotonin or getting “store-bought”. Only a few psychiatric drugs are directly ingesting the neurotransmitter.

The Rates of depression have gone up in the past 25 years, not down. Our most recent numbers (2017) showed a rate of 7.1% in US adults and 1991 there was only a rate of 3.3%. If our steady increase in medications for depression were having a massive effect, we should have a decrease at least in the rates of major depressive episodes a year, if those with chronic depression were treated and the medication fixed the neurotransmitter problems there should be fewer repeat episodes. Now we can say some stigma decrease allows better treatment sure and contributes to higher rates, but the key part is a lack of systemic improved outcomes.

A rate of around 13% is shown in adolescents.  A rise in extreme pressure in school, media consumption rates, climate grief and other social factors are all indicated to have effects. If social factors improve, these rates may decrease.

Those social factors show in the data:

Indigenous Americans and Alaskan Natives have higher rates of depression and other mental health groups.

Black and Hispanic populations tend to have more persistent and chronic depression.

Women and adolescent girls both have higher rates than those of the opposite sex.

Mixed-race people have the highest rates of depression among racial groups

Low socioeconomic status is a risk factor in developing depression and all mental health issues.

The hyper-medicalization of mental health is for-profit and born from the dismissal of childhood trauma and connected to misogyny and classism. The APA has had a history of connections to powerful groups and dismissing trauma for years, even going as far as to say horrific abuses like incest, being possibly beneficial or at least harmless to children. To this day they still refuse to understand developmental trauma and DTD. The DSM also tends to pathologize behaviours linked to stress in children, labelling them as oppositional defiant (ODD) instead of asking why.

Social political factors not taken into account, leaving our mental health and social support system lacking the tools to address the specific needs of Marginalised communities.

The hyper-medical model is also politically advantageous. If we do not notice that the way our model of employment, social precarity and systemic failures are causing depression and other illness, then we won’t’ fight back. If we don’t understand how our culture steeped in abuse affects our health we won’t change it. A  healthier culture would help combat all mental health problems including depression.

Depression needs to be understood as not just your brain being a sick organ or an illness “just like any other”. Because the fact is it’s not. It’s extremely context-dependent and it’s interesting and complicated. Socio-political circumstance, environment, physical health, childhood and interpersonal relationships all impact our depression.

Which is good in some ways, because we can help alter some of those and important insights showing us combating oppression and our political system would help us! It shows us we have to be holistic in our approach.

If we have people who only think in the medicalised only structure it opens the door for the “sceptics”, “faith healers” and “ The Secret peddler” telling us to pray or “manifest” our depression away. Which is dangerous faith is important and we ought to be critical of pharmacological companies but we can’t throw neuropsychology out entirely and definitely can’t fall into toxic “self Help” or Goop style woo.

It’s healing to know you’re not stuck with a broken brain. But a brain that is struggling through multiple stressors and is currently not operating properly. But you can help it through therapy, behaviour changes, connecting with others, combating alienation, learning, needed medical intervention grounding skills, emotional regulation techniques and becoming embodied.

And by knowing while you can help yourself, you’re not the problem and nor is your body. The problem is also social factors and your history of stress and/or trauma. Which means your body is not fighting against you or failing you. Which is so liberating. Knowing what is and isn’t in your control.

Depression is not just a lack of serotonin or part of your brain that’s broken, it’s complex and complicated and tied in with our culture of abuse and trauma.

Citations undercut

Kirsch I (2019) Placebo Effect in the Treatment of Depression and Anxiety. Front. Psychiatry 10:407. DOI: 10.3389/fpsyt.2019.00407

Martin, Elizabeth I et al. “The neurobiology of anxiety disorders: brain imaging, genetics, and psychoneuroendocrinology.” The psychiatric clinics of North America vol. 32,3 (2009): 549-75. DOI:10.1016/j.psc.2009.05.004

Sandeep K and Rajmeet S: Role of different neurotransmitters in anxiety: a systemic review. Int J Pharm Sci Res 2017; 8(2): 411-21.doi: 10.13040/IJPSR.0975-8232.8(2).411-21.

Socioeconomic Status and Mental Illness: Tests of the Social Causation and Selection Hypotheses, “Christopher G. Hudson, Ph.D., Salem State College; American Journal of Orthopsychiatry, Vol. 75, No. 1.

12-19-17 Fact Sheet_Diversity.indd

A., Van der Kolk Bessel. The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma. Penguin Books, 2015.

“Big New Study Confirms Antidepressants Work Better than Placebo.” NHS Choices, NHS, 22 Feb. 2018, www.nhs.uk/news/medication/big-new-study-confirms-antidepressants-work-better-placebo/.

Hari, Johann. “Is Everything You Think You Know about Depression Wrong?” The Guardian, Guardian News and Media, 7 Jan. 2018, www.theguardian.com/society/2018/jan/07/is-everything-you-think-you-know-about-depression-wrong-johann-hari-lost-connections?CMP=share_btn_tw.

Harvard Health Publishing. “What Causes Depression?” Harvard Health, Harvard University, 24 June 2019, www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/what-causes-depression.

Johnson, Adam H, and Nima Shirazi. “Citations Nedded.” Citations Nedded, 6 May 2020, https://citationsneeded.libsyn.com/episode-109-self-help-culture-and-the-rise-of-corporate-happiness-monitoring.

Levinson, Douglas F, and Walter E Nichols. “Major Depression and Genetics.” Stanford Medicine, Stanford University , med.stanford.edu/depressiongenetics/mddandgenes.html.

Lorant, V. “Socioeconomic Inequalities in Depression: A Meta-Analysis.” American Journal of Epidemiology, vol. 157, no. 2, 15, Jan. 2003, pp. 98–112., doi:10.1093/aje/kwf182.

“Major Depression.” National Institute of Mental Health, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Feb. 2019, www.nimh.nih.gov/health/statistics/major-depression.shtml.

“Native American Communities and Mental Health.” Mental Health America, MHA, 2016, www.mhanational.org/issues/native-american-communities-and-mental-health.

O'Shea, Breht. “Revolutionary Left Radio.” Revolutionary Left Radio, 20 Jan. 2019, https://revolutionaryleftradio.libsyn.com/drugs-addiction-and-social-conditions.

Schimelpfening, Nancy. “Factors That Could Increase Your Risk of Depression.” Verywell Mind, Verywell Mind, 21 Mar. 2020, www.verywellmind.com/common-causes-of-depression-1066772.

Weinhold, Barry K., and Janae B. Weinhold. Developmental Trauma: the Game Changer in the Mental Health Profession. CICRCL Press, 2018.

#depression #mental health #mental illness #abuse culture #trauma culture #actuallydepressed #serotonin #childhood trauma #child abuse #trauma #mental health misconceptions #mental health awareness #complex trauma #culture of abuse #cultural trauma #depressive disorders

[oneshortdamnfuse]

Jokes on you.

Or Why The Jokes About Rami Malek Need to Stop

I already typed up my thoughts about the kinds of jokes people make about Rami Malek and their implications, here. That was just to get my ideas out of my head, organized in a post, before I gave a more wordy response re: my feelings about the ongoing issue of people mocking Rami Malek’s speech / behavior.

Here’s the issue for those of you who are not aware: Due to Rami Malek’s rise in popularity, people have found numerous things to poke fun at him for including his speech and his behavior. The problem is that certain jokes come from a racist and/or ableist place, whether they are intended to be or not.

This problem would not be as big of an issue if they did not become so commonplace. Jokes regarding his speech and behavior have reached mainstream pop television with fellow celebrities and media commentators weighing in on how awkward Rami Malek is as a person.

A few things to keep in mind about me -- I’m white, and my experiences with race and ethnicity aren’t comparable to Rami Malek’s. My perspective on these topics is informed by things Rami Malek has said himself about his ethnicity and race, or from the perspectives of people I work with who are 99.9% not white.

I don’t have any specifically named diagnosed disorders, but I do have chronic illness, anxiety, and obsessive compulsive thoughts / behaviors which people may find weird. I have avoided diagnosis / therapy because of stigma and anxiety. My thoughts on ableism in humor are informed, in part, by this.

This post IS NOT about the following: “You should not be critical of celebrities, you can not laugh at their expense, you can not find things that they say or do to be funny -- intentional or otherwise.” This post IS about the following: “Jokes that punch down are lazy, ignorant, and harmful.”

This is a long post, so under the read more it goes. If you read anything from me about this, though, this is the post to read.

Let’s talk about stereotypes first. I’m not going to link to every single resource I talk about here, you can easily look these things up. Rami Malek has talked about his experiences with race and ethnicity fairly publicly in his awards speeches as well as his SAG-AFTRA interviews.

Rami Malek cites explicit examples in his own life of how stereotypes have negatively impacted him in a personal and professional manner. One, he experienced bullying / social out-casting because of racial / ethnic differences. Two, he experienced limited opportunities / type-casting for the same reason.

Factors that played into this include the way that he looks, the way he talks, the way he acts, and cultural markers such as his name, family traditions, language, etc. Industry professionals have made negative comments about his physical appearance and/or they’ve typecast him into negative roles.

One negative role that he was typecast into several times was a terrorist, in particular one-dimensional terrorist roles in procedural dramas. This is because he is Egyptian. He speaks Arabic. He’s not white. etc. Jokes about him being a “terrorist” evoke these stereotypes and their real impacts on his life.

Rami Malek has been “jokingly” referred to as a terrorist several times by film fans during awards season. In defense, people have claimed the following: “I didn’t know he wasn’t white.” “I say the same things about white actors.” “You didn’t have a problem when I said it about [insert actor who is white.]”

Here’s the thing -- Rami Malek has talked about being “too ethnic, but not ethnic enough.” The fact that some people cannot identify his race and ethnicity, does not mean he does not experience the ill effects of racism and ethnocentrism. Also, white celebrities don’t experience these ill effects.

If I were to, in a hyperbolic manner, refer to a white celebrity as a terrorist for being in my face all the time or dominating awards season (for example), it may be in poor taste to compare their existence to terrorism. Doing the same to a person like Rami Malek doesn’t have the same impact -- it’s much worse.

The stereotype actively impacts Arab actors who become typecast. This actually happened to Rami Malek, and it’s only now that he has some industry clout that he can afford to deny jobs calling for him to play a terrorist. Furthermore, this stereotype pushes people to fear and/or other Arab people.

Rami Malek doesn’t just not play terrorists anymore because he doesn’t like it from a type-casting perspective. He finds it unethical to portray his race, ethnicity, culture, language, etc. in such a one-dimensional negative way that causes real world harm to people like him.

Unfortunately, the terrorist jokes are far from the only issue. Another popular joke is to refer to celebrity men as domestic help -- usually in the way of uplifting celebrity women. I get it. Women experience disparities in representation and in opportunities, so it’s fun to pick on men for this. But.

What does that mean for Rami Malek who struggled for fifteen years to receive even the same level of recognition as white women, for example? The fact of the matter is that people of color, no matter their gender, are often reduced to one-dimensional roles including domestic help.

If you look at Rami Malek’s awards, you’ll find that the majority of them were received within the last five years out of a fifteen year career. Before those five years, he wasn’t nominated for anything. He was not given a lead role in a major production until Mr. Robot which was not intended for an Arab lead anyway.

Rami Malek is one of the very few Arab men to win awards by major associations. To be recognized is a historical win which has been diminished by the politics of awards season and film fans who seek to find justifiable reason to make jokes that evoke racist stereotypes.

I cannot speak on how they make Rami Malek feel (He doesn’t like social media, so his awareness of them is indeterminable) and I cannot speak on how they make Middle Eastern / North African, Arab, and/or Coptic people feel. What I do know is that these stereotypes have real world impacts on these communities.

This includes bullying (which I have witnessed -- American-born English-speaking students referring to immigrant, refugee, first-gen MENA students as “Ay-Rabs,” terrorists; mocking traditional language and customs including kissing, hand-holding, other signs of affection; and physical attacks.)

This includes limited job opportunities. Rami Malek has experienced limited job opportunities, and he fought to just find work in the industry. I’ve also seen local businesses attacked because they were run by Middle Eastern / North African people. I’ve helped students fill out job apps, then they get no calls back.

I don’t experience these things because my name is not stigmatized. My culture is not stigmatized. The way that I look is not stigmatized because of my race or my ethnicity. I have never been told to change a feature of mine because it is incongruous with whiteness. That happens to people like Rami Malek.

That happened to Rami Malek. So, jokes that evoke racist stereotyping “punch down” on a specific group of people. It does not matter that Rami Malek is a big name celebrity now with many fans, movie deals, and a lot of money. The kind of things people find “funny” about him come from a racist place.

Then there are jokes about him being a “serial killer” and/or having “serial killer vibes” which evoke both racist and ableist stereotyping, especially because of the level of fear-mongering it involves of people who are different based on their race, ethnicity, and/or ability. 

People joke about this because of his speech and behavior.

Both people who are Middle Eastern / North African and neurodivergent and/or mentally ill people are stereotyped similarly, in that they are positioned as uniquely dangerous, suspicious, depraved, or evil. You can’t separate the two issues entirely (racism and ableism) when someone could be both.

I’ve said this repeatedly, but I have no interest in “armchair diagnosing” Rami Malek. That is not my intended goal. However, he presents atypical speech and behavior that is more common among people who are neurodivergent and/or mentally ill, that people unfortunately mock relentlessly. 

Rami Malek’s speech and behavior is undoubtedly impacted by his race, ethnicity, culture, language, etc. He is multilingual. He grew up in a multicultural environment. He’s had to negotiate his identity as a first generation American between two worlds -- that of his immigrant parents and American society.

Let’s establish right now that what he thinks is “normal” may be different not just because he is different, but because his culture is different. That’s not a bad thing. There’s nothing harmful about this, despite how alienated he initially felt by it. As he’s said before, it’s important to embrace and celebrate difference. 

That being said, he is different in a few noticeable ways. There’s his speech -- he has a lateral lisp, which causes him to make “sh” sounds in place of ‘s’ sounds which is more noticeable when he is excited. He speaks slowly at times, and very fast at other times. He can be monotone at times. etc.

Then there’s his behavior. He’s frequently hyper-stimulated, and he’s noted to be “twitchy” by his peers. He cannot sit still. He needs to move. Other times, he is “zoned-out.” He takes longer to process information in interviews at times. He avoids direct eye contact. etc.

What that means for Rami Malek is personal to Rami Malek. It’s not my business or anyone’s business to know why he is the way that he is. What we do know is that it’s “atypical” of Hollywood celebrities, because of how often celebrities and commentators make it their business to other his speech and behavior. 

The “serial killer” jokes which essentially position “atypical” speech and behavior as inherently threatening, suspicious, scary, etc. are just one part of the problem. He’s also been referred to as incredibly awkward and/or mocked for his speech and behavior by peers and celebrity media sites. 

There’s also the fact that people have tried to armchair diagnose him as mentally ill or “on drugs,” which I’ve discussed in this post about how using body language to judge someone in this manner is pseudoscientific and ableist. Again, these “jokes” have real world implications.

Viewing someone with “atypical” speech and behavior as inherently threatening or scary does more to harm them than it does to harm you. It’s one reason why I’ve struggled to get help for multiple mental health concerns. The stigma that is associated with these speech and behavioral patterns is harmful to us.

It is also very isolating and alienating. Rami Malek plays a character who is very isolated and alienated for the same reason, and he’s talked candidly about how sad it is that we as a society spurn people like Elliot Alderson just because they are different. On a related note, the mockery of this character is harmful, too.

Pete Davidson’s impressions of Rami Malek and by extension -- Elliot Alderson, rely on ableist stereotyping. While a blank stare on Elliot Alderson’s face is met with some narrative explanation as to why he is “zoning out,” the blank-stare impression of him makes a joke out of his mental unavailability.  

This is something people, including myself, experience frequently. People make the assumption that “nothing is going on up there,” we are “crazy,” and/or we are “dangerous” for “zoning out.” Depersonalization and derealization are things I experience that cause it. It’s more scary for me than it is for you. 

Plus, it’s such a lazy and inaccurate parody of Rami and Elliot. Rami Malek shows such a wide range of emotion, as does Elliot Alderson. He put in a lot of effort into the role, including consulting with mental health professionals to get a fair representation. Then people mock him for being accurate?

Then people mock him for being different in his own right? Look, Rami Malek has fame that may act as a buffer between himself and the kind of mockery he experiences but that does not mean that the rest of us get away from it unscathed (...and still, it’s an asshole thing to do to him.)

These “jokes” are not jokes about his own flubs, something silly he did, anything he deserves to get “dragged” for, or anything that gives power to a marginalized group of people. No. These jokes “punch down,” because they are specifically designed to make people feel bad and wrong for being different. 

Rami Malek is different. His background is different from the majority in his industry. His speech and behavior is atypical. That makes him different. It makes him unique. Jokes about his unique qualities evoke both racist and ableist stereotypes. He’s pretty good at joking about himself, but this isn’t joking. 

This is cruelty. It’s playground bullying at best, othering with real world harmful implications at worst in the form of social isolation, lost job opportunities, slander to his reputation, and violence towards people who are different -- which, he’s received plenty of threats before and he’s been subject of racist conspiracies.

I don’t feel good about being isolated and alienated. I don’t feel good about my insecurities being used as fodder for cruelty. I can’t imagine with the emotion he has put into talking about these things through his interviews that he feels good about it either. I don’t expect people who thrive off this kind of thing to stop.

I do expect people who actually give a shit (or at least pretend to give a shit) about these issues to take a minute to rethink the way they’ve been talking about Rami Malek (...and literally just, anyone who is like him!) We can sit here all day and talk about how, well, he should expect this. He’s a celebrity.

Except. Some of you never take the time to think about the things you say, and you should do that. You should take up that responsibility, because it’s not just about him. You share the world with a lot of people who are different from you. It’s within your power to make it more bearable for those people.

If you engage in this kind of nonsense, the joke’s on you. Your greatest amusement is your own ignorance. What you see as lacking in other people is actually your own ignorance and unwillingness to accept difference. Most of all, you’re not funny... and it’s not because people “can’t take a joke.”

Clearly, you can’t deliver one. 

#rami malek #long post cw #text post

[thewestmeetingroom]

TWMR Ep 48 No Body-Mind Left Behind

SPEAKERS

Alex Locust, Jheanelle Anderson, Beau Hayward, Alisha Krishna, Janine Al Hadidi,

Facilitated by Day Milman

 Janine  

Hello, and welcome to the West Meeting Room. We are broadcasting on CIUT 89.5 FM at Hart House. My name is Janine and for this week's episode, we'll be sharing a recording from November 19, 2020 of a panel discussion about Disability Justice titled No Body/Mind Left Behind. This event was a partnership between Hart House and the annual Diversity and Equity conference from U of T Sport and Rec and the Faculty of Kinesiology and Physical Education. My colleague Day Milman facilitated this conversation between U of T students, recent alumni and special guest, Alex Locust, where they explored how Disability Justice creates a framework for society that benefits everyone. More information about this event, and all of its panelists will be available in our show notes. We hope you enjoy this conversation as much as we did.

 Day Milman  

Welcome, everybody tonight. My name is Day Milman. I am the manager of Learning and Community at Hart House, which is the community center of the University of Toronto. And I am so excited to be here as part of this event tonight. Thank you so much for joining us for what promises to be a rich intersectional conversation grounded in lived experiences of people with disabilities. Tonight we'll explore Disability Justice and how this lens can radically alter how we navigate the world and support each other on this journey. Tonight's conversation is a panel discussion between U of T students recent alumni and our special guest Alex Locust, also known as The Glamputee. So Alex is a certified rehabilitation counselor and a proud multiracial glamputee spreading the word about social justice one workshop at a time. Whether on the runway, or in a counseling session, Alex aspires to emulate the tenacity of the trailblazers before him and fiercely advocates for equity in all community spaces. Thank you, Alex, so much for coming tonight. And I'd also like to invite our panelists to introduce themselves tonight starting with Jheanelle Anderson.

 Jheanelle Anderson  

Thank you Day, I'm Jheanelle, I am a recent graduate, just completed my MSW at the Faculty of Social Work at U of T. I sit as a co-chair of the Disability Justice Network of Ontario, in Hamilton. Yeah, and I'm a research assistant with the Center for Research and Innovation for Black Survivors of Homicide Victims. Really excited to be here tonight and have this discussion, much needed discussion. Thank you.

 Alisha Krishna  

Hi, everyone. My name is Alisha Krishna, I use they them pronouns. I have lived experience with learning disabilities, mental illness, physical disability. So identifying as disabled is my identity. I'm a first year law student at U of T and also the treasurer of Students for Barrier Free Access, which is a levy funded group on the U of T campus. And we're run by and for disabled students, advocating for the removal of barriers in education. And I also am very excited for tonight.

 Beau Hayward  

Hi, all my name is Beau Hayward, pronouns are he and him. And I am part of the Diversity and Equity team as the Equity Initiative Student Lead, a student leader and I'm looking to work with the university and develop some accessibility around athletics and physical education. And very excited to have this conversation with Alex and the rest of the panelists.

 Day Milman  

Thanks, everybody. Thanks so much for being here tonight and for sharing your energy and your experiences. So let's just start off with a question for Alex. In a previous conversation, you said to me that Disability Justice is like a north star in the work that you do. Maybe not everyone here is familiar with Disability Justice, and I'm wondering if you could just start off by giving us a bit of a grounding in what Disability Justice is and how it plays out in your life.

 Alex Locust  

Absolutely. I am just so happy to be here. And after our conversation last week, I was just like, humming and so it's just always wonderful to be in conversation with other people with disabilities and so I'm really happy to share what Disability Justice means to me and explore that in relationship with each other. I also just want to quick pause and offer an invitation if the other panelists are interested in just offering an image description for those who who are tuning in and don't have the ability to see us right now. I'm biracial, as Day mentioned, I've got my big curly mane back in a, in a little ponytail, very much in my pink paradise with my "She's All Fat" shirt that I'm very happy to be wearing. Lots of lots of scruff, it's been a long week. So just offering that really quickly, just so, you know, model access, right, that's a huge part of Disability Justice is that collective access piece, but as a north star for me, you know, I came into an understanding or awareness of Disability Justice through Sins Invalid, in the Bay Area, Patty Burn as the director of Sins Invalid, the performing arts group of queer and trans, black and brown disabled people performing beautiful pieces about about their bodies, their minds, their sexuality. And what I came to learn was that Disability Justice was an evolution of disability, civil rights, much like, you know, reproductive justice is an evolution of reproductive rights, you know, environmental justice, right, these frameworks that are acknowledging that, champions, changemakers, these advocates, came before us and really broke open a dialogue, broke open space, to acknowledge that, you know, in this case, disabled people were not being afforded the rights that they deserved. And then Disability Justice is acknowledging that rights are great, you know, as a bare minimum, but when we're thinking about what liberation feels like, what freedom feels like, we have to attend to the nuances within the community. You know, there are black and brown disabled people, there are queer disabled people, you know? As a as a black, queer, disabled person, I feel very seen by that. And, you know, it's about exploring the liberation of disabled people from an intersectional lens, and from one that's by led by the most impacted, right, so Patty Berne, Mia Mingus, LeRoy Moore, Sebastian Margaret, Eli Claire, the late Stacey Park, right, these amazing people came together and proposed these 10 Principles of Disability Justice, which are saying, you know, this is how we collectively, everybody, not just disabled people, you know, Disability Justice isn't just for disabled people, it's for everyone. That's, I think where that title really speaks to me, it's no body left behind. It's not about how you identify or what your label is. This is this is for all of our freedom.

 Day Milman  

Yeah, absolutely. That's where the title for this conversation came in was. "No body, no mind left behind" was directly from the principles which were developed by Sins Invalid, which you can look up. And I'm wondering if we can ask some of the other panelists to sort of talk a little bit about their experience and how Disability Justice works in their lives.

 Alisha Krishna  

And I can go first, just image description, I'm in my bedroom in Toronto. I'm Indian, Canadian, I have long black hair, I'm wearing a hoodie. And I have glasses as well. Discovering Disability Justice, it's taken me a long time. So I've been with SBA for three years. And I've really been in this for three years. And it's never a finished process. Like I still go to events that we host and workshops and stuff, and I still always learn something about myself and the way I relate to people. But in terms of what I have learned, instead of what I have yet to learn, what I hold on to most is the fact that, you do as much as you can, and that's okay. They tell you this in law school a lot, where it's very high pressure and people have a lot of trouble with this and I understand it completely. But living as a disabled person, you actually just do what you can, and it turns out that disabled people are so good at negotiating these boundaries, that what you end up doing is amazing anyways, right? Just objectively speaking, so  there's there's a lot to be said for taking care of yourself, taking care of others around you. Others like being able to ask for help when you need it. And looking at the long term sustainability of things, I think that's really powerful, and I think that underpins a lot of what I try to do in my practice, but what I think everyone is attempting to do, at least in my law school Disability Justice circles.

 Jheanelle Anderson  

So, Disability Justice was quite a new concept for me. And, you know, it was like, Alex framed it, liberating, you know, engaging in that work. Prior to that, you know, I held on to a lot of internalized ableism, I am a black, immigrant and disabled woman. And, you know, a lot of my journey to Canada was traumatic, but also resulted in me having to lose a leg to come here, in a sense. And then, you know, over the years, I developed a chronic illness. And, you know, just drawing back to what Alisha said, just being able to not see yourself as a burden. Moving away from what society has, like, you know, ingrained in me growing up as a kid with disability, trying to, like, not look different, or trying to prove myself was always that constant struggle. Um, but, you know, learning and confronting that internalized ableism, you know, I, I should be valued, you know, we should move away from this deficit view of disability, because, like, it's the external factors that exacerbate how I like, I'm able to participate in society. So that's definitely one way. Disability Justice has, like, influenced me. And in my work, you know, I am a member and co-chair of the Advisory Committee for the Disability Justice Network of Ontario. And it's exactly what, as Alex described it, you know, Disability Justice is not just for disabled folks, it is for everyone. You know, everyone benefits from accommodation, everyone benefits from accessibility. It's not just for disabled people. Mutual aid, you know, what came from this Disability Justice movements, you know, care mongering, is a response to the shortages from COVID. You know, that mutual aid, again, disability, like ran by disabled folks. And just like another point, I'll just mention the site with COVID, it really did lay bare, all the disparities, all the inequities, but more so, you know, what disabled folks have been advocating for was always like, looked as at as a burden. Like, no, we can't do that, you know, you know, it factors in, because probably because they can't surveil employees as well. But it was always a barrier for institutions to implement these things. But then with COVID, you know, the capitalists are like, oh, or money. So, you know, these things that disabled folks have been advocating, and getting shut down for has now been implemented, like at the switch just like that. So, you know, these are things that are addressed, and can be addressed with Disability Justice. Thank you.

 Beau Hayward  

Thank you so much, Jheanelle, I think that you, you know, with remote education and remote work, coming to the forefront due to COVID. Luckily, I just started going back to school, so I was able to kind of get right into the swing of things that way. But definitely think that because people are isolated due to COVID, it brings attention to these things that disabled folks have been working towards for a long time. I'd like to ask Alex a question. Alex, we talked about this previously, but on your website, it said, you have a quote saying that "it's high time we leave disability awareness and etiquette conversations in the past." Moving forward, the Diversity and Equity Sports and Rec, we're looking to implement like a ski day, which I know we talked about last time and we're doing like a bocci team event and we're just trying to implement some new sporting initiatives, so intersectionality and leaving behind that disability awareness and etiquette, do you have any suggestions for us moving forward?

 Alex Locust  

Yeah, you know, hearing that that quote of mine, again, I realized that that quote was kind of almost like a self-drag, you know, I used to, when I was doing the workshop years ago, have a section called, like, disability etiquette, or I would, you know, market what I was doing is like a disability awareness training, you know, so, I was a part of, you know, Jheanelle talked about internalized ableism, like, I was a part of that machine. And I think what I realized over time is like, why am I perpetuating this idea that disabled people are people that we should, like, become aware about? How are you unaware? What, I just  want to know, like, how anybody can be in a state at this point in time, you know, and be like, I didn't know that disabled people existed, I didn't know that we needed access features. You know, I mean, in the US, the ADA was signed days after I was born. And so I'm like, I'm the ADA years old, you know,, when people say, "Oh, you know, this place is inaccessible, we're having a hard time" I'm like, times ticking, like, it's been three decades, you know, and, and that's just for legislation. So, when you hear people quote the census data or things that are like disabled people are like a quarter or a fifth of the population in the US, it's like, disability is such a normal, inherent part of the human experience, that to categorize the need to like become more inclusive as an awareness effort, or etiquette is so othering and it's so divorced from like, the reality of what's going on. It's just almost, it's kind of playing into this game that people can keep, like, saying. Well, I had no idea, you know, like, I need you to get an idea. I saw someone in the chat mentioned, Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha work, and Leah has, you know, that that conceptualization of like, that you need to figure it out, because you're going to become disabled someday, if you get old enough. The four of us, we're already at the party. You know, people are outside waiting in line, you know, we got the VIP passes. We're already in, we're in the booth, right? To your question, about moving past etiquette, past, awareness, like we, we just need to baseline, like, focus on efforts, like, you know, Alice Wong's accesses love campaign, like, everything should just be accessible period, that should be the bare minimum, we shouldn't be putting out events, we shouldn't be doing gatherings, we shouldn't be creating community spaces that are inaccessible anymore. It's just, it's,  you know, unforgivable. And I think for people tuning in, if you are non-disabled, and you're looking to like, earn that ally-ship card, this is a time to be like, "Hey, friend, you're hosting a really cool party. I don't see any mention of access here" or like, "hey, this gathering looks really amazing. Can you put some access features in in the description?" How are you showing up for that, and then to elevate beyond just the bare minimum access, you know. Disability Justice invites us to lead by the most impacted. So if you're starting a space from scratch, are disabled people involved in the planning or their voices, you know, if you're doing community advisory boards, if you're having people contribute, if there are no disabled people present, it's very likely that you will not succeed at making it as accessible as it needs to be. And I just think that, you know, representation matters. You know, we talked about that last week, like not just at the beginning, but throughout the process. If you're doing a ski day, having disabled ski instructors, if you're, you know, in a fitness center having disabled personal trainers and coaches. I think they're really communicate to the people you're inviting into this space. It's not just this like you know, little feather in your cap that you're like, Look, we did it, like "wink", we got we got the logo or you know, it's like, no, we will not survive as a community unless we integrate the lived experiences of the people that we're trying to reach out to and last piece about, you know, that Leah inspired me, in that piece, they have a piece,  like Surviving the Trumpocalypse and like Wild Disability Justice Dreams, they talk about relationship building with the disability community, right. And so, you know, Beau, you're embarking on these really amazing opportunities where you are a disabled person leading that. And I think that that can communicate to other disabled people that that might be a more trustworthy opportunity than, you know, an institution or an organization, all of a sudden being like, we're doing a Disabled Sports Day. And I'm like, I've never heard of you, I don't see any disabled people involved, you know, and then they do everything they're supposed to. And disabled people don't show up. And they're like, what's that about? And, you know, it's like, we don't trust you, even like you haven't earned that sense. So it's like, this is a years long process. And I think people want overnight results. And that's just not how it works with people who've been harmed routinely and systemically by institutions.

 Alisha Krishna  

I also just want to add something to what Alex, you were saying before about, about everyone eventually becoming disabled. I think awareness of disabled people is premised on this idea that non-disabled people can do everything all the time, which is not true. What you were talking about accommodations being for everybody, I think that's fundamentally true. Because in this world of capitalism, and all the productivity requirements, and things like that, the requirements that are required of anybody are ridiculous half the time. Case in point, most of my childhood was spent sitting in a desk for eight hours. Who decided children would be fine sitting in a room for eight hours all day for years on end? right like that, that makes no sense to me now, and  I probably would have asked for an accommodation to like, move around, or switch classrooms or something like that. But for any child, it's the same story. So it's not like, my disability is something to be aware about it's just that the entire situation is ridiculous. And I think understanding that lets you see accommodations, both asking for them and implementing them, in a different light, for instance, by asking them I mean, some people don't feel like they can ask for accommodations, like they're, they're burdening people or like, asking for too much, but you are actually entitled to that, like, both legally and as a person. So yeah, that's what I wanted to add in there.

 Alex Locust  

You know, Alisha, you're, you're really highlighting the, the social model, right? The disabling features of society, it's so easy to focus on like a physical impairment, right? Or something visible even on non-apparent, right, we're talking about chronic illness and mental health disabilities learning disabilities. But when you focus on that impairment, you're like, individualizing, you know, when other people focus on these things, you're individualizing it and so I hear what you're saying can feel like, I, Alex, I'm asking for too much. Right? Or like in the USA, ADA is phrased as like a lot of like reasonable accommodation was just shitty, right? Why are there unreasonable accommodation? And so to flip that script, and to say, how is this society creating these inaccessible experiences? Again, when we look at the intersection of these things, you know, TL Lewis has done beautiful work around how racism, you know, anti-blackness can create a sense of disability, right? And so if we think about like, intelligence, and the pressures of the norms around intelligence, and the racial stereotypes around intelligence, if you have a black child who can't sit for eight hours, you know, it's this compounding of people making gross, you know, assumptions about black people's intelligence and their worthiness in the space. And so then, of course, that child is deemed as special needs, right? Or they need remediation, or they have an issue, they have a learning disability. And it's like, what would it be like, just like you said, if it the school day was broken up, if it was, you know, on their own time, I can say, you know, I think, somebody mentioned, you know, COVID and working like, right now working from home with the emotional labor that I do, I get so zonked at midday. I have, (I'm not sending this to my co-workers...)  I eat lunch, I take a nap. And then I just like get up early, now. Do you know what I mean? Like I just do work, I get up, at 6. I go to bed at like 10 or 11. And then I'm so much more capable of doing the work that has been assigned to me. Rather than being like I have to work 9 to 5, that means I'm a good worker. It's like, my brain needs rest, my heart needs rest. And that's not about disability, that's just this situation is not accessible.

 Jheanelle Anderson  

I just wanted to add something around like disability awareness.  I feel like where it lands is like an inspiration-porn,  kind of, at least that's where I feel like awareness is. We mentioned representation. And I think a majority of the representation for disabled people, if there is ever any, i s either tokenized, and barely ever shows disabled people as people.  We all look different, you know, the intersectionality of it all, like, you know, sexuality, race, etc. So it's barely ever represented like that, like, you're a person. It's more of like, just an inspiration; a disabled person doing what they have to do, because of the structural factors around that, they're limiting them,  that people like, go like applauding and just like, "Oh, my God, if they can do it, what's your excuse?" Horrible. I do want to commend Holland-Bloorview Kids Rehab, they have a campaign out,  where  it's, they're arguing for our presentation, like, they're advocating for representation. Kids need, like, I wish when I was growing up, I saw like myself represented in media, and just, like a person. Like, that's what we are, you know, why can't we just exist the way we are without being like, made a poster child, an inspiration, poster child. You know, just that representation, just as humans, is very important. And I think there's that one aspect of it, and we talked about it last week, where the movies... there's a movie out called "Witches" with Anne Hathaway, where they portrayed disability, deformity, as like, inherently associated with evilness, and scary. And I think, you know, that kind of pushes back, strides that, you know, people have made for kids to feel comfortable in their bodies. Or  for a kid to see a body that looks different, to not feel scared of it, or to not look at it as weird. And you know, I think society has , like social media, this is like a constant thing where I know on TikTok, there was like, a viral challenge where they showed, like, parents during COVID, showed like a image of a disabled person to their kids saying that this is their new teacher, and recorded kids reaction for laughs and like, we need to move beyond this, you know?

 Alex Locust  

Yeah, I couldn't agree more. I you know, the pop culture-junkie representation is such a part of how I process the world around me. And, you know, I can't remember if I mentioned this last time we talked, but, you know, my roommate was watching Howl's Moving Castle, and it has Mr. Turnip, who's like, basically a scarecrow that just  hops a lot. And I'm like, why am I feeling more represented by an animated scarecrow than I typically do? In most media? You know, what I mean? And, as a kid, I was really drawn to Tigger, you know, cuz he hopped a lot. It's a reach, either to me, like, I'm going to these characters that aren't even human, just to feel seen. And I think that's why Sins Invalid, like, struck such a deep chord in me because their approaching the work from an intersectional lens. And so it's not just about disability, it's about how the queerness and disability come together. How do race and disability interplay? You know, generally, you're talking about inspiration porn, and it's like, man, I'm just trying to get bare minimum, like good disability representation. I'm not even out here being like, Can we get good queer disability representation? Am I gonna see a queer BIPOC disabled person, like, slow down, even though I mean, like, I feel like that's how much I am at a point where I don't feel like we're afforded these things typically, but then there's really amazing work like Superfest which celebrates international perspectives of disability, right? And it's a film festival for and by disabled people. So it does exist, right. It's just like, these things don't get caught up in the mainstream. And then, like you said, these mainstream images continued to reinforce either inspiration-porn or this vilification of disabled bodies in a way where it plays out in society. You know,  I went to a wedding, it was two years ago,  and you know, it's a queer wedding, I'm having a good time. I'm drinking, it's an open bar, right]? I danced, had a great night, the next day, somebody walked past me, and he was like, "hey, you're my hero." And I'm like, for why? Right? Because I was dancing and having a good time? Like, is that how little you think of disabled people that you're like, "Whoa, he's like, having a good time and enjoying himself." I'm like, No, I'm drunk, like, Who are your heroes, you know?

 Jheanelle Anderson  

And you're not locked away in a closet somewhere, like being hidden from the world because of your disability!

 Alex Locust  

Right, laying in bed.

 Day Milman  

Alex, we chatted awhile ago, just about, you know, when we go on to your website, for instance, which I encourage everybody to do that, you know, there's no separating out of your professional work as a mental health counselor, or your work as, you know, an activist or a person who puts workshops on. And I wonder if you could just chat a bit about that decision, to not separate all these different parts of yourself out.

 Alex Locust    

It's been a very intentional process,  it feels very precarious, to be honest. The more that I immerse myself in the working world, the more that I hear how people talk about work, right? And they're like, "in my personal life", or "in my professional life", and I think, the pandemic examples that we're talking about... you know. I mean, literally,  these lives are happening there together.  Working at an AIDS nonprofit, where we're, we're trying to, like, center racial justice, we're having uprising around George Floyd and Breonna Taylor, and all of these black lives that have been lost.  You can't ask black people to just come into work and be like, no, this is your work life, leave your personal life out. And so I'm really working to integrate those selves to model the importance of, of exploring how those things impact each other, how they can nourish each other. I live both and at the same time. Your energy is not allocated separately. They cause an impact on each other. I know, Alisha, during the planning call, brought up really great themes around sustainability and longevity of the work, how do we take care of ourselves. And I think the more that I explore my activism as like, art, as self-expression, as healing, unless it was like work, you know, it's just like a part of the way that I exist, I think I take it more seriously as something that needs tending that needs respect and needs reverence. And also for myself, to not overdo it because then, you know, I can't I can't show up long term. Disability Justice is inviting us to do this work sustainably. So how do I listen to my body and my mind, and my foot is such an interesting alarm bell, right? If I stand on my foot for too long, it starts to hurt. And it will get to a point where I need to sit down. And and I think, to me, that's what Disability Justice is teaching us, it's like, my, my foot is being like, "Girl, sit down, stop, you know, take a breath, slow down." And if I listened to that, then why am I not listening to like, I'm tired, I need to go to bed early. I can't take another gig this week. I facilitated too many times in one day, you know? I think there are so many invitations there and I'll just close with, you know, my exploration of pleasure activism, you know, adrienne maree brown, proposing this theory or this way of embodying activism as this irresistible practice. We should find activism to be deeply pleasurable, like, I think work, you know, professionalism is so devoid of pleasure. It's so devoid of joy most time, you know? I'm starting to zoom calls, I'm playing disco, if you're with me, it's not gonna be like a really dry day because this is hard work, you know? And so  we have to have fun. I partake in substances, right? I have sex. I'm a person, and I want to experience those things. And so as an activist, I want to, I want to talk about my sexuality, I want to talk about how I employ harm reduction in order to let off some steam, but do so in a way where it works for me, and I'm taking care of myself. And I think if we act like those things don't exist if I, if I do those things, and it replicates this idea that professionals are people who come in, and they're wearing nice clothes, and they say nice words, and they don't ruffle anybody's feathers, and it's like, No, I want to go into a space and be like, you know, obviously don't lead with , I had a slutty weekend, but like, if we want to talk about it, and that's related to how I'm finding agency and autonomy in my  queer, you know, BIPOC, disabled, body, that feels very ripe for this conversation.

 Alisha Krishna  

I also just want to add what you said about the professional thing, I'm obsessed with this lawyer out of BC right now, she's indigenous and amazing Myrna McCallum. She is spearheading this awareness movement in the legal profession, called trauma informed lawyering. And a lot of it has to do with like, knowing how trauma manifests, and people just interacting with the legal system. But a lot of it comes from the fact that people tend to separate their, like personhood and professional life. And there are created barriers between, like effective representation. And like you, if you put up this wall of like, I'm wearing a suit, I'm behind a desk, I'm, you know, like here to just do my work and just leave. So it's really about bringing yourself back in to the space and it actually just makes you a better professional. Because you're able to, like, deal with, like, interact with your clients in a much more fruitful way. And I yeah, I just, I really responded to what you're saying, Alex,

 Day Milman  

One of the themes that we've been sort of touching on a little bit here, and there is just sustainability. And I wonder if anyone else wants to talk about that aspect of their experience and how you're learning to navigate working with sustainability in mind in terms of your own energy and what you can bring to this work.

 Beau Hayward  

I'll talk a little bit about productivity and maintaining a good healthy work cycle, we're talking about we we've been discussing having some check ins, about particularly physical, physical health, during the, during the pandemic, and for people with disabilities and without. And you know, I think we've been given this opportunity where we are working and studying from home where we can really identify the hours in the day while more productive and, and put those two best used. And so I know for myself, it's been really good learning experience, being able to learn remotely and utilize these hours of the day when I'm most attentive, and, you know, dedicated to that, and then when there's time to do physical work to get in shape and stay in shape, um, you know, devoting that time to that task. So, I think it's really interesting that we get this opportunity, and hopefully, that'll carry on past COVID, whenever at the end of this virus is, but hopefully we can take those lessons and move forward with them.

 Jheanelle Anderson  

For sure, everyone mentioned it's really like being attuned to your body. And, like really recognizing and being aware. Um, you know, for me, when I'm burnt out, or when I'm tired, I get really irritable. If I start noticing that I'm irritable, I say like, I need to take a break. Like, stay off social media, you know, minimize your intake of my intake of news, and just do nothing. And I think Alisha last week, I mentioned it, just reframing this whole idea of the lazy day or laziness. But yeah, just have rest and being comfortable having rest being comfortable relaxing, like for the longest time I've always felt guilty because I was like, Oh my god, I have so much to do or like oh my god, I don't have anything to do I need something to do. So you know, that's that whole like capital system just kind of ingrained in our psyche of like, our bodies being tied to or bodies or value being tied to like how like our labor and how how much we can use it. So just being comfortable, like not judging yourself for needing rest. It's normal. So like, I binge watch some shows like Netflix has girlfriends and Sister Sister. Yeah, so I'm just like reliving my childhood. And just not judging myself for that. So it's definitely being aware. It's like, you know, Alex mentioned like, you know, physical like physically, like, you know, when it you have to stop. But, you know, mentally it's like we don't draw boundaries. And you know, I think Bo just mentioned how how the lines have been blurred now more than ever, with remote work, where people just feel like they have access to you all the time. So it's just really dry, saying no, just having hard boundaries, and do what works best for you really.

 Alisha Krishna  

I think also, I second everything that has been said, but I think also, maybe my context is different because I come from, like community like SBA is run by a board. So I'm always in working with other people. One of the tenants of Disability Justice is recognizing wholeness. I interpret that to mean, like, you always,  well, it's in the they've written it, but like, you always have worth, and it's sort of led to this unique understanding of ability and talent and capacity. And I think recognizing that opens you up to a whole set of resources that you may not have realized you had. So then you can sort of rely on other people, while meeting them in the middle sort of thing, and you don't have to take on everything by yourself. And so you can, you know, take that brass when you need it and feel like you're not letting anybody down, because you are you've shared the work.

   Alex Locust  

Absolutely, I really appreciate that. You bringing in recognizing wholeness, you know, Jheanelle, speaking to like, anti-capitalism, you know, as another Disability Justice principle, which, by the way, I really didn't know you were talking about like the capitalists like having their money or freaking out and I just love this idea of like a bunch of like, older white men being like our body. But, you know, I just want to as Alisha brought in like that, that lazy idea or interrogating and pushing back against from that intersectional lens who's called lazy, right? Who gets to get away with being lazy, right? Is it like, you know, white, affluent influencers on Instagram, like in their mansions being like, I'm having a lazy day, you know, it's like, okay, cool, like you're being glorified for that, you know, black and brown people are vilified if they need to, like, rely on benefits in order to make ends meet, because the systems have created these inaccessible spaces for them to like, thrive, right. And then so they're like, lazy because they're depending on the system. It's like, that's why Disability Justice is about interdependence is because the system, the state creates a state where like, we have to depend on each other because that's not going to give us what we need. So, I think just, it's not just about laziness and being like this ablest concept, it can also be racist, it can be classist. And, you know, both speaking to like, what works for your body, what you need, it's like that, I think it's so important. It's not that you should be working out because you should be working out, it's like, does that feel good for you? Do you like want to feel that in your body, then that's how you should approach this. And that's not anti-capitalist approach. It's like, Where's their value and what you want to do not because you should be doing it, so you're productive. You know, how do you especially in the time, right, like Beau, so beautifully put, it's like, the things that we're learning now should carry us through this pandemic. So many people are clawing to like, I wish it was back to normal, I want to go back to how it was. It's like, girls of color coming from inside the house, that's how we got here. You know, so like, we can't go back there. We need to take what we learned forward and really challenge, like, why a pandemic struck, and we're like, I need to learn Spanish, now's the time! You know, it's like, if you didn't know it, then like, just focus on you, like, take care of yourself. And then maybe you can get those payments. But like, I think, yeah, the wholeness that Alisha brought up like, I've had to reckon with that in my house. Feeling like I don't contribute as much because I'm like, I'm not doing things in the garden, or it's harder for me to clean. But then I'm like, I'm like a reservoir of emotional labor. Like, try me a process. Anyway, you know, so that's also a value and if we move away from like, only these things are valuable or that there's like a hierarchy. Then it breaks up in this like, this entire constellation of ways that everybody can be in community and like, contribute and be collective as opposed to like this independent like, I'm gonna do everything and I'll take care of myself because that's, that's how I get through at the end of the day.

 Day Milman  

Yeah, I think that U of T has a particular kind of culture around valuing overwork, performative busy-ness, and that kind of thing. I wonder, you know, I wonder how students and Jheanelle, you just graduated last year, you know how you managed to navigate that and put Disability Justice principles, forefront in trying to navigate those kinds of things, and the systems that we have in place at U of T.

 Jheanelle Anderson  

So, for me, I, like other than getting over like those, like Alisha mentioned, a feeling like badly for requesting accommodations. I also think that the culture and like having professors who are also like, I say, disability aware, but you know, like accessibility aware, are just really thoughtful, and accommodating professors, because I like I was fortunate in my Faculty of Social Work. They were pretty accommodating, they were very understanding, they understood like, accessibility means they understood the pressures of school, and think a lot of other departments are like that. So the culture of like you mentioned, like performative, like busy-ness, the culture of pressure, that, you know, if you're not like studying, you're doing nothing, like your worth is tied to how wrapped up in schoolwork you are, how late you're staying up. So, I had a really great experience, you know, dealing with accommodations, which helped break that barrier down for me with asking, because it was just embedded in the culture of the faculty. And the professors were also very thoughtful, recognizing, like, not only disability needs, but that's the whole point too, is that, you know, these accommodations weren't just for students with disabilities, like, you recognize us school, junior masters, or just doing any degree is very stressful. There's also your life outside of school, like, there are lots of demands on you. And like, maybe you have to hand that paper in like a like a week or so later. But it's just like developing that partnership to work. Just so you know, you can complete the tasks that you need to do.

 Beau Hayward  

I think, I'd like to just say that my experience at the university has been incredible. I mean, I do a huge shout out to everyone at Accessibility Services, who has made this, you know, going back and get, you know, pursuing higher education possible for me. Also, when I brought it to the attention of my accessibility advisor that I wanted to play sports, she directed me to Robin and getting a position and being able to speak on panels and having these opportunities. The university, I believe, is doing a great job of unexpected, like Accessibility Services and diversity and equity. It's all this collective effort is just really great. And I'd like to say that my experience has been fantastic. And not say that, obviously, things can always improve, because they definitely, definitely can improve. And that's, that's what we're working towards.

 Day Milman  

Alisha, do you want to add anything to that?

 Alisha Krishna  

Yeah, yeah. So first of all, Jheanelle said something along the lines of like, you have a life outside of the university. And I, that's totally the truth. But in my personal context, so I actually did both my undergrad and my, like, I'm doing my law degree, both at U of T. So I've had wildly different experiences. The undergrad here is very large. So you kind of feel like you're lost. I was in the cinema faculty, and I learned a lot of valuable self-advocacy skills. So we actually do like workshops on this. The, the Accessibility Services, they're great. But sometimes the way they interact with students requires a certain kind of articulation that I feel like is not inherent to many disabled students, like, especially ones who are just coming to terms with it. So like, I know people who are just accessing accommodations right now and they, they explained to me like what they're going to ask for and they sort of couch it in like this explanation and like justification for it. Like, in my experience, that has been exactly the opposite of what you need to do, you sort of need to go into your appointments with doctors, accommodation, people, anyone who's asking you anything and sort of be firm and what you know, to be true, just from your lived experience you, like, obviously explain if they ask you to explain and provide documentation, whatever, but there's no reason to sort of, like need to provide a justification. And I feel like, that took me a really long time to learn.

 Jheanelle Anderson  

I'm also like, just an extension of like, within the school, I was part of my degree, I needed to do field education. And I think that was something that was lacking with regard to attitudes towards disabled people. And, you know, just accessibility, like, yeah, on paper there is like, you know, this former Yeah, if you need accommodations, but like, the attitudinal barriers that I've experienced when I was doing my field placement was huge. And I somewhat felt, you know, a lack of support. Because maybe people just didn't take it as seriously as other forms of oppression, which is, like, I think is a constant theme for like people with, like disabilities, like people will just gaslight you and like, wasn't like that. So, like, you know, that's just something else to like, consider with, like, the culture, not like, just at U of T, but just like, by extension, like the world, lets me just like during my field placement, and not feeling accommodated. Or just like, you know, my first field placement was in a hospital, and because of my experiences in a hospital and conveying that, you know, I felt like, they, you know, the educators are judging me, thinking that I can handle it, because of my previous experiences. So just kind of like, telling me what I can handle, like that paternalization, happens a lot. And then, you know, not being taken seriously, when you like, call out the ableism. So there's like, that kind of twofold thing where one like the culture of like, not accommodating people or not considering, like, the pressure that like your actual, like life outside of school, but also like minimizing or dismissing, like, your experience of ableism. But, you know, I will say that I had a really great accessibility counselor. And I wish I went to her about like, my concerns, because like, you know, she went hard for me after and was able to implement, like, um, like, workshops on ableism, on disability, for field educators, because I think that's important, as well.

 Day Milman  

Absolutely, yeah, this has been a really amazing and rich conversation that's given us lots to consider. And I think Disability Justice is it's just such a robust framework, that for me is a non-disabled person has really kind of opened my eyes up to how nested all these different forms of oppression are. And so, you know, for me, I'm just so like, my mind is really just working through constantly like how I can incorporate these principles into my work and the platform that I have as a facilitator at U of T. And so maybe, you know, we can end up on that question is just how is Disability Justice in the forefront for you, as you move forward as organizers on campus? And how can we kind of hold accountable? That same principle for, you know, the administrators and the deans and all the folks that were, that are decision makers at U of T?

 Alisha Krishna  

Yeah, I think so. There are a lot of things that you have two students that have been advocating for of the admin, most notably better mental health supports for students. And, and especially, I mean, I don't know if the conversation is as live as it was a little while ago, but the mandated leave of absence policy has also been very contentious. I think a lot of it comes from on the admin side, and this is pure speculation, I have no like, background knowledge of this or I'm not speaking for anybody when I say this, but I think a lot of it is coming from fear of liability. Especially the lap, like, essentially, it's just like, you're not UMTS problem, you're someone else's problem, but you're not U of T's problem. And I think it clearly has not worked. And they're clearly liable for things now, like, maybe not legally, but at least morally speaking, like, the recent tragedies that have happened on campus, no one's gonna look at them and say: yeah, you did, like, all you could do you did your due diligence. That's not. So I think there,  I think more attention needs to be paid to student demands, and in a way that doesn't see them as inherently conflicting. Like, we're not student activists are not inherently against the admin just because like, we often come into conflict like that, but it's not. We don't have to be we don't want to be really, that would be the perfect thing would be for me not having to do this. You know.

 Day Milman  

Thank you. Anyone else want to add to that, before we wrap up? Janine?

 Janine  

Thank you so much. This was first of all, so informative. Secondly, a fresh of breath of air.  Sorry, bilingual brain. But I just, I wanted to sort of ask you guys more about this concept of self care and community care, and how you guys have engaged with community care during this time, whether it's advocacy, for accessibility, kind of helping out people in the community, but also taking that time for yourself. So what was that looked like for you guys to have that balance of being part of the community and being active in the space, but also having that downtime for yourself and taking care of yourself, because I can imagine it, it gets overwhelming. Sometimes just hearing a lot of stories, especially during COVID.

 Beau Hayward  

I think, for myself, taking care has been maintaining some semblance of a schedule, that's just my personal way of keeping myself in line. Just you can see the calendar in the background, I just, you know, kind of have everything regimented. And that's, you know, obviously, not everybody's thing and also finding a way to stay active in the house. For a lot of physically disabled people staying physically active, super important. So well, it's important for everybody, but it's important because at least in my case, body deterioration, atrophy happens really quickly. So maintaining that level of fitness definitely as has been a stabilizer,

 Alex Locust  

I can add,you know, that that question of self-care, taps really into what I find Disability Justice to be another invitation to look to interdependence. Right. And, and how can I, you know, you mentioned community care, right? Like, how can I get out of my own head that like, I have to be the like, first and last off on like, how to take care of myself? How can I turn to community and offer these this care mutually, I mean, there are certain things that I'm trying to practice about, kind of my own boundaries, my own limitations, you know, like a shout out to Day and Robin for having patience with I put like a email, an auto reply on my email that's like, hey, just going down, give me like a week or two to reply to you, you know, which I had never done before. And I feel like it really communicates, it's just being transparent, right? Because I couldn't have just been like, I'll reply in a week or two. And not tell people, that's what I'm doing. Because, in essence, a lot of people reaching out to me, has not paid me yet to earn that kind of response time. So you know, but, you know, there's also that that piece where you're modeling like, Hey, we need to make, I think somebody mentioned like social media breaks, like making it known, like, I'm not just available, like, I'm going through a lot, you know, and I'm trying to take care of myself and reorient my focus and my energy. So when you let other people know that your practice I think it helps them reorient with you, as opposed to just kind of keeping it inside. And I'll just offer one last thing that I've seen. Several people do really beautifully, particularly around like surgeries, or intense like medical procedures as well, like create the disabled people in Excel sheets was just like, like, just you'll see some real magic and it's like, you know, this community care thing where it's like, who is able to bring me a meal to is down to hang out, you know, I had a friend where their experience meant that they were like, you know, it was during COVID. They got top surgery and so like, who wants to do zoom calls, you know, like, we'll do karaoke nights, you know, and, and so people just like fill in what you can do. And I feel like if we were more as a culture and a practice of it, that's a beautiful response to like a medical procedure but like what if you're like, you know, Alisha's gonna go through like exams, you know, what if it's like, a bad breakup? What if it's, you know, these kind of circumstances where it doesn't have to be I just moved, you know, how do we kind of create this thing where it's like, I need help. And I'm asking for it. And that doesn't mean we could actually means I'm really strong to name that I need help. And to ask for that, I would love to see more practices like that.

 Alisha Krishna  

I also have one other thing to add very practically, I started doing this year in like mid-September, I actually have an app on my phone that tracks my hours and it tracks my hours for each like class I'm taking each project I'm taking is the greatest thing I've ever done. Because if I'm feeling behind or something and I like cognitively, I just can't do it anymore, I can still look back at my like week of work and be like, I put in all that time already. Like this is totally valid for me to take a break now. And it's really, it lets me do things that I would never have done otherwise.

 Day Milman  

So I'm just gonna say, let's call it a conversation for the ages. I loved being part of this. And I really just want to give each and every one of the panelists, my heartfelt thanks for all the energy, your honesty and for sharing what you've learned, and for being vulnerable. I know that's really tough. But I think it does a lot of good for people to see how you are navigating these experiences in life and, and making a party out of it and making yourself shine and sparkle. And yeah, so thanks to Beau, and to Alisha to Jheanelle, and thank you so much to Alex for bringing your special brand of magic and gorgeousness to this conversation and to the world that we're in now. And I just want to say thank you so much, and wish each and every one of the people who attended tonight, you know, kindness to yourself and patience and just to take some of these learnings that we've had tonight and apply them to your own life as we move forward into the winter and to a bit of the unknown.

 Janine  

Thank you so much to all of our panelists for sharing their insights with us. And thank you to our partners for holding space for this essential conversation. Special thanks to the Hart House Student podcasting team for producing today's episode. You are listening to the west meeting room on CUIT  89.5 fm. We're here every Saturday at 7am. And you can find all of our episodes on our Hart House stories page on SoundCloud. We'd love to hear from you. We're on Instagram at hart house stories and twitter at hh podcasting. Thank you so much for listening, take good care of each other and we'll be back with you next week.

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