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average-monster-enjoyer · 9 months

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Heyyy if you rlly like monster, i recommed checking out a brazilian TTRPG named "Ordem Paranormal"! They got a bunch of cool monsters!

Heres a few i think u would enjoy:

The Lurker(og name is "O Espreitador")

It's first appearances(episode 1, season 4) in the TTRPG were only in stalks, only it's eyes appearing. Making the main characters paranoid, because right when they said they saw the eyes, the eyes disappear.

its full appearance only appeared in episode fourteen(still season 4), the characters actually fight it this time. This folk is able to summon almost perfect clones of the victims it watched for a long time, using they to fight the characters.

Its main thing is just stalk people. It can even drain someone's sanity while they sleep and leave them with insomnia for a few weeks just by watching they.

Also, it technically it was created by one of the characters from the first season (Daniel Hartmann), he was a writer and The Lurker was one of his tells... I dont remember how his creations created life my bad.

Alright next one.

The foreigner("O Estrangeiro")

If you accompanied R/Place you prob heard of this one.

This one is quite a mistery yet from what I heard, but we know this folk got a big connection to the "Bells of Tenebris". Everyone who had an experience with this being went back to living their lives normally, as if nothing had happened, but still with a feeling that something is wrong, even though they don't know exactly what it is.

He just appeared in the second spin-off of the TTRPG, "Sinais do Outro Lado"

Next one.

The Needy("O Carente")

(its original introduction to the TTRPG is really, really good. It gives me chills every time I watch it. REALLY recommend taking a look)

This one was also one of the tales of Daniel!! The original story is about a creature that devours the internal organs of women who have given birth thanks to its envy of beings who receive love even before they are born.

And the devil himself says Needy is his child... Cool as hell. And yeah we got the devil in the TTRPG, we will talk about that guy later..... We got a recording from a character of Needy and Devil walking together

Cute.

Anyway next.

I have like... Two more to show u, but i think these are already enough. So we are going straight to the GOOD PART.

The Relics of Calamity("As Relíquias da Calamidade")

The relics are.... complicated.

They are fellas of great power. And only "markeds" can have control of them. Having a relic is equal of having 100% of paranormal exposure.

Long story, quick response: they are very powerfull paranormal object that when a marker takes control of them, that relic becomes one with the wielder. Sometimes, the relic takes more control of the wielder than they.

The relics are also a representation of the elements of the paranormal, energy, blood, death and knowledgent. But for now, we dont have someone to represent the element of fear, being it a very mysterious element.

In the relics, we have:

The Host(Anfitrião), relic of energy

Very chaotic guy, my favorite!! Sadly he just appeared for a few episodes, and for not having a wielder, he doesnt appear anymor :[[

His personality in general is the representation of chaos, making sick games that already distort reality making people go against each other. He doesn't care about anything that isn't his own fun.

Host doesnt like the other relics, but Devil seems to be an exception.... They are kinda of besties.

Love this guy.

The Devil(O Diabo), relic of blood

I dont know if I have much to say bout this one? Not a big Devil fan lol.

While Host just want to have fun, Devil wants to, well, fuck people's life, and he was never manipulated, defeated or imprisoned.

He is known as someone who makes pacts for people, giving them gifts after making the pact, with the payment not coming until some time later... Hes also able to summon any paranormal creature whos envolved with the element of blood, any.

The Magistrate(A Magistrada), relic of knowledgent.

The relic knowledgent is actually a mask, and whoever wear it, becomes Magistrate, the leader of the cult of mask, and their only goal is to protect the balance of reality. (We still don't know why or how...)

The Magistrate knows and remember everything that happened on earth. Everything. However, they can't interfere with reality with their wisdom

Unlike Host, Magistrate is calm and much more reserved. And because Magistrate wants this whole not interfering with reality thing, Host hates they.

LAST ONE!!!

God of Death(Deus da Morte), relic of, well, death.

PAL..... HIS THEME SONG IS SUUUUCH A BANGER, PLEASE SEARCH HEILAG VAGGA AND LISTEN TO IT!!!

Also known as "Parasite of Dimensions", God of Death is the relic that protects the chronology of the universe, able to manifest in multiple places and multiple forms at once via his Time Warp. When he doesn't have a wielder, he manifests himself in the form of an anachronistic civilization, which may vary in name between Holy Cradle, Sacred Beginning, Divine Beginning or Eternal Beginning.

Because God of Death have this thing or protect time and stuff, Host ALSO hates him because of a thing that happened... But if I explain this situation I would do 40 lines of explanation, and this is already big enough.

Hope u enjoyed ig. If you want more monsters from OP i have a few more i think u would like.

Hi I'm so sorry I only read like a little bit of this and looked at the pictures but

OH MY FUCKING GOD I ABSOLUTELY ADORE THE MONSTER DESIGN IN THIS, JUST THE FIRST THREE WERE ENOUGH TO MAKE ME RUIN MY SHORTS, I WILL 100% TRY TO CHECK THIS OUT, THANK YOU FOR TELLING ME ABOUT THIS!!!!!!

:DDDDDDDD!!!!!

#average monster enjoyer #Ordem Paranormal #cool monsters

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didwho · 1 year

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Hello! You mentioned looking for more info about labels and stuff, so, if you're interested, here are a few things we've personally learned from several years as a "Origins Are Weird And Confusing" system who has been in therapy for A While at this point, in case they're useful to you: - you deserve whatever support you need, regardless of origin or dx or anything else. Therapy, friends who listen to you and support you, academic or workplace accommodations, the right to be unhappy and having a shitty time--you don't have to prove anything to be allowed to want/have those things. - trauma is a subjective experience about how your brain processed something difficult--not about whether the events were 'objectively bad enough to count', because there is no externally defined threshold. (There are certain types of negative experiences that are statistically very likely to be traumatic to the average person, but that absolutely does not mean that only those types of experiences "count".) - if you are experiencing lasting negative impacts from something that happened to you, 1) there is nothing you need to prove in order to be 'allowed' to get support for it; 2) anyone telling you that it wasn't bad enough to affect you is wrong. (This is true even in contexts completely unrelated to syscourse, btw!) - DID in specific is predominantly associated with chronic trauma/adverse experiences during childhood. However, if you have struggles with mental health issues and feel like a system, your options are not just either "100% Definitely DID" or "You're Making It All Up". Whether the label that happens to fit you and your experiences best is DID or any other label (OSDD, MaDD, PTSD + system, "stuff is shitty rn" + system, "who even knows", etc.) is between yourselves and the people on your support team--it's not the business of internet discourse randos trying to tell you whether or not you're valid. (Besides, figuring out what labels fit you best often isn't actually easy or obvious right away, for any number of reasons--including the fact that sketchy and/or 'muted' memories of awful experiences is a big part of many CDDs--and that's okay. Really. You get to figure stuff out at your own pace.) - you are allowed to use/benefit from CDD management strategies and ways of thinking whether or not you have one. (People without ADHD can use bullet journals. DBT isn't just for people with BPD. Etc. If it helps you, the important part is that it helps you.) - don't let the haters get you down. (There are folks out there in syscourse with complex and nuanced opinions, legitimate critiques of communities, etc.! And also, there are sometimes people who just want to be 'allowed' to feel hateful towards someone, aren't in good faith, and aren't interested in listening. What those people think of you or say about you Does. Not. Matter. They are howling at the moon.)

Good luck out there <3

thank you so so so so so much for the kind words!! i preach all of the same things yet sometimes its hard to believe it for yourself, so i genuinely really appreciate the reassurance.

i am looking for a label as of currently because i dont really know whats what, yknow?? its hard for someone like me because despite preaching all of those things, i struggle to understand what defines trauma!

a lot of my headmates tend to agree we do have trauma, but those who dont tend to feel very strongly about not, so it kinda pushes that positivity away!

it really sucks to be both your own supporter and your own enemy at the same time (not calling my headmates enemies its just the best way i can describe it)!

the vents i post are usually when im feeling fired up or upset over things, and again, for that post/ rant i had earlier i spread misinfo, which i feel HORRIBLE about, but i will keep the post up because someone else made a point on it and had the patience to help educate me!

i am still learning and alla that, its hard to navigate this community because theres so many terms, and due to general amnesia, whether it be the fact im a system or due to my ADHD, its hard to get a grasp on all of those!

anyways, sorry for the ramble and thank you so much for the kind words! i hope you have an amazing day ❤️

#endo support #syscource #overall emotional support #d4 #ask

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ovinetanuki · 3 years

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Ok, I'm gonna pop off for a bit because this has been driving me nuts for like a decade now - I'm real tired of seeing people (who either don't understand how show production works or are willingly choosing to ignore it) going after showrunner's throats when who they're really pissy with are the corporations that host those shows.

Stuff like plot, internal continuity, and character development are writing issues that can be critiqued in a vacuum, stuff like pacing, representation, and runtime are not.

If you are mad that a show was too short, that it's pacing was shitty or it's representation wasn't good enough, that is an issue with the higher ups in the network, not the writers and showrunners.

You need to redirect your anger at CN, Disney and Nickelodeon, go after them for holding animation back, and leave showrunners the fuck alone.

Do you really think that Infinity Train would end on an awkward fourth book, that Korra and Asami would only hold hands, that Legend of Korra would have such a bizarre second season, that Steven Universe would reduce it's final arc to five fucking episodes, that Gravity Falls would hide it's LBGT characters in the background, that The Owl House would end after three seasons, that so many shows would wait until their last episode to confirm their character's sexualities, if they had the choice to do something else???

Take your torches and pitchforks to capitalism's doors, not creators'.

#and also folks saying something is objectively bad when really they just dont like a shows morals #but that's another can of worms #steven universe #the legend of korra #the owl house #adventure time #infinity train #gravity falls #Me and CN are about to throw fucking hands #well ill be damned #this is my first post to hit 1k lmao

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perperam · 3 years

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OKAY I saw your Instagram post things and I just want to know what are your headcanons for that universe?? Is there any specific AU you imagine the Instagram AUs happening in or do you have specific rules for your own ideal version or

somehow, surprisingly, you're not the only one to ask this !!

okay so funny story at first I literally just drew the instagram things bc I thought yeah harley would be so loved by all of internet generation gen z college kids (as an internet gen z recently graduated undergrad myself)

but then as I made the posts more and more intricate with the comments and stuff it kinda...grew into something bigger? like they actually have a particular AU for them now!! so that's fun

here's what I'm thinkin I want in my social media AU:

world building wise:

neither of them are really "heroes" but they aren't outright supervillains either—like they're anti-heroes that dont give a shit about corporate & capitalist culture

aka they can, have, and will continue to steal from big market names and threaten CEOs, but will also pool money to pay small business and support local folks

much like the vibes of the harley quinn animated series, harley and the rest are literally Just People and go to coffee shops and just hang out in public (the fuck is GCPD gonna do for them drinking coffee, send em to Arkham??)

this makes them really well liked by Gotham's general public

also because ivy has and will kill rapists and bad men on sight and harley has on more than one occasion been linked to crimes where abusers have mysteriously turned up dead or beat to a pulp with a blunt object suspiciously shaped like a bat or sledgehammer

there's this specific tattoo shop harley really likes that she goes to whenever she wants a new piece done, and because of her instagram they've become the most popular place in Gotham, in fact if you go there on any given day you have a 25% chance of seeing harley

also I wasn't kidding when I said harley really would have her own psychiatry clinic and continue to treat people (mostly college kids and criminals) for free because harley says fuck the US health care system and helping others would be really fulfilling to her

harley advertising on her instagram story: hey yall I'll be having a trauma processing session tonight at my clinic please stop by if you want to make an appointment or listen to my lecture

oh also harley has a podcast and the episodes vary from "workout routine" to "breaking the glass ceiling of female supervillains and the male gaze in crime" to "why stealing is sometimes okay" to "studying for the mcat and quick tips" to "perhaps marx was right" to random tangents that go on and on and on

pam on the other hand is not only a feared ex-supervillain but now a revered member of Gotham's city-revitalization planning committee

in between heists for rare floral specimen she plans climate protests and tree-planting events and in general does her damn best to try and bring some sort of green to Gotham in a "legal fashion" (a news source once said this and ivy almost killed the news anchor on the fucking spot from how much rage pumped through her veins in that moment)

characters & dynamics wise:

harley and ivy have been living together and literally married for like, a year now by this point

selina is over so often she might as well be living at their apartment

the gotham city sirens and the batkids are besties!! as they should be (this used to stress bruce out to no end but after the third family dinner dick planned with "aunty harls and pam" he had to eventually give up)

in fact jason and harley often get involved in stupid shenanigans and dick is almost always there with them and literal seconds from being implicated in their scheme somehow

jason is often at harley and ivy’s apartment and can greatly relate to harley in many different ways (from growing up in a crime riddled neighborhood to having intense trauma courtesy of the joker and ivy finds it endearing that he trusts harley enough to let people in (and there is a visible, tangible change in him after he starts getting closer to harley, everyone can feel how much happier he becomes)

harley and ivy are 28 and 32 respectively but because ivy literally has the interests and name of a 90 year old everyone just teases her by calling her "grandma pamela"

the batkids refer to them as aunty harley and aunty (sometimes grandma) ivy and ivy fights every time for a different name but just gave up sometime after tim joined in

ivy and tim get along really well, surprisingly

also alfred literally loves pam because she helps the plants in bruce's neglected green house thrive and ivy really enjoys his company because he's on the same wave length as her and "knows when to shut the fuck up and just bask in the quiet unlike literally all other men"

I think I want babs and dinah to be dating bc have you seen their chemistry and dick and kori to be dating bc again have you seen their chemistry but I'm kinda torn and in between and idk

bud and lou are great cuddle bugs and ivy secretly loves it but pretends she hates it to harley's face bc a girl's gotta save some semblance of dignity right

details:

harley has adhd and you can't convince me, someone with adhd, otherwise

harley has both shitty tattoos that she gets for no other reason other than that it's funny or that she hyperfixates on them super hard for half a second and suddenly there's art on her again and ivy's just ?? when she gets home. she also really meaningful tattoos that she has multiple consultations about

she had two ribcage tattoos before the joker, got three tattoos commemorating him during their (highly abusive) relationship which she immediately covered with new ink upon leaving him, and gets a lot of patchwork style tattoos down her arms and thighs

she has a giant flower tattoo going down her entire spine and it's ivy's favorite thing ever

ivy actually also has a (singular) tattoo and it's a diamond with a stem and leaves as if it were a flower

it's still very much a work in progress but since multiple people have asked me about this I thought I'll dump all my thoughts here

#mryanswers #harley quinn #harlivy

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papabirdurskeks · 3 years

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I ask this both for Baron Dark, Ariandel and SkekSo !

Give me a character and I will answer: @ben-the-hyena

Oh boy a triple feature! :D Here we go, folks!

Under a read more cause its going to get long but each listed character will be split apart evenly!

First up is Baron Dark!

Why I like them: He is just bombastic in personality! He lives loud in his actions and words, participating in most of the action himself while also showing he is a threat and menacing altogether! I also like that he is one of the few villains that shows he cares for his crew as a “family” (at least for most part of the series before being overtaken with obsession to have power more on his own). Given the dynamic we are given from the show, its obvious he cares and treats them all on a level of respect as well, something so rare to see nowadays! And I also enjoyed that his reasons to take over and do the shit he did in the series, “Because I can!” is just as refreshing and fun to see in a villain too! And again, his design is a top tier design I love overall! Its menacing, powerful, and outright amazing! Definitely adds to the character and how well he works in effect to keeping my attention! Like just look at that design! And his VA did a wonderful job of adding to that charm that is just delightful to see in his personality! Overall, he is totally a villain I would love to see more of in the future!

Why I don’t: I say my dislikes often fall on the usual tropes of a kid’s show of the 90s. He talks too much when he could be doing things himself and falls victim to the typical “I am too powerful” but doesn’t think of the obvious steps ahead that will be his downfall. But honestly, its so small I don’t find it jarring or that bad to be in the way! It was the 90s and aimed at kids at the time, so we can’t expect TOO much out of that xD

Favorite episode (scene if movie): Oh man, that’s a tough one cause every scene/episode Baron is in he totally slays it! Its either a tie from the first episode to the very last one cause the stakes of start and finish are so well done, I love it all!

Favorite season/movie: Obviously, the TV series is the best version of him! The comics sucked and turned him too OOC from what was initially given! Like how does one go from point A to be Z so freaking fast? xD

Favorite line: “Because I can.” Yeah, not gonna lie this was indeed my favorite line of his xD

Favorite outfit: Honestly, the outfit he gains near the end of the series is by far my favorite! Its like a mix of the Bejeweled Catacomb Saints and Mictlantechutli put in one and its befitting of the Baron given his gain in power!

OTP: Baron and Cyborn are my OTP and are married, fight me.

Brotp: Definitely Brotps with the rest of his henchmen though I see them more being like his adoptive children!

Head Canon: Baron is of indigenous background! I also like to headcanon that the white tuft/strands in his hair are truly his and have been there since birth! (I have so many more HCs for him but I will keep it short cause it can go all day x’) )

Unpopular opinion: Don’t think I have one, at the moment at least.

A wish: To have gotten more information/lore on him and the entire cast, honestly! I would have loved to see more of his character explored and what more he could have had to offer as a series main villain! Hell, the whole damn series had so much to offer! And just the relationships he has with the others and what more he could have done post season and before! So much potential there to be explored! I honestly would not be objecting to a reboot/revival or continuation of the series!

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: Though with that said, if a reboot does come around, don’t turn it into the mess of current cartoons we have. Not that they are all bad but most of them have been very disappointing in keeping my attention and liking. Keep the same type of messages it had before! It worked beautifully as it did then and still does work now! I’d love to see the same formulas used while also updating it to be more gritty and mature like they did for Castlevania! Just... Don’t turn it into a cringe worthy mess that will ruin Baron and all the characters in the series! Don’t do what the comics did!

5 words to best describe them: Charmingly evil, badass, fun, conniving bastard, and menacing.

My nickname for them: Mega dork (affectionately speaking)

Next is Ariandel!

Why I like them: Oh boy, there is a lot to say in terms of why I like him but I will try to keep it short and simple for time purposes! His design is top tier for me! Like a rotting skull like face? Check! A monstrous body much like a bird’s? Check! And to add he is a giant Corvian, which are one of my favorite enemies in Dark Souls III! His personality also differs from the usual loud, bombastic, and proud characters I tend to gravitate for. Instead, he’s withdrawn and rather sad to look at and hear. You know he’s going through a lot but don’t know exactly what it is. In game, one can sort of get hints as to what has gone on behind the scenes but at the same time, its still vague and hard to really pinpoint what really did happen. So he has that air of mystery to him that I honestly adore in many characters as it leaves room to explore deeper into their lore! But I also find his personality relatable as well as sympathetic. But that’s just me, I can gush about him all day but I will cut it short here x’)

Why I don’t: To be honest I don't have any reason not to like Ariandel other then the small fact that he followed Friede and let the Painted World rot in such a terrible state. But that is so minor of an issue to me to really make a difference, lol. I adore this giant bird man!

Favorite episode (scene if movie): I have to say the scene where he ultimately snaps and breaks out of binds after seeing Friede's lifeless body before him is my favorite scene of his. The amount of pain and anguish heard in his scream and the way he moves prior and after; I can very much relate to that feeling. Sometimes, actions truly convey the emotions better in the most powerful means necessary. And this scene alone truly nailed it.

Favorite season/movie: He's only ever seen in the Dark Souls III DLC, so obvious answer points to the DLC!

Favorite line: "When the Ashes are two, a flame alighteth. Thou'rt Ash, and fire befits thee, of course..."

Favorite outfit: Uhh, he doesn't really wear any clothes save for his cape? So I guess the cape does him well as he is, though I always draw him without it xD

OTP: To be honest, I don't ship him with any canon characters within Dark Souls. Friede does not deserve him..

Brotp: Ariandel being best friends with the Ashen One is my ultimate Brotp! Just think of how much of a valuable ally he could have been!

Head Canon: I know his origins are debatable, as either theory I have for him can be plausible but I often lean more towards the idea of him being half Giant and half Corvian! IDK why but I just like it a lot more x’)

Unpopular opinion: While Ariandel is partly responsible for what happened to the Painted World, I still feel he was manipulated overall and probably at one point did have a change of heart before being forced into complete isolation. He plays more the role of the willing/unwilling accomplice then the actual perpetrator of the crime.

A wish: He could have had a happier ending without having to die for Friede. I know, its Dark Souls. Such a thing is expected to happen in the Soulsborne series but its a wish, right?

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: That anything beyond the infatuation he had for Friede took place. Just.. No. He loved her but never could ever have her in that sense and never did. Just no, she is horrible to him.

5 words to best describe them: Sad, lonely, birdman, withdrawn, and tragic

My nickname for them: Papa bird

And lastly for skekSo!

Why I like them: I think its as obvious as the case for Baron Dark. I like evil, smug bastards that shine through their wickedness and don't usually hold back. In the case of skekSo, I actually didn't care for him at first but then after my second viewing of the show, I started to like him more and enjoy his villainy! He's selfish, arrogant, vain, and conniving and I love it! Added that his design is really appealing to the eye and how he carries himself out, I gotta say he's one of the few villain characters from a show that makes the turn around for me to like them instead of hate them more. Also, his voice. Can NOT go wrong with that voice cause DAMN, its good and shows just how powerful a villain can be with a voice like his. And those eyes. Oh man, those eyes!

Why I don’t: Despite his villainy being the main point that caught my attention, its also a part of his downfall too. His constant greed and arrogance pushed him too far into doing what he did and ultimately cost him everything in the end; including loyal allies that end up dying for him in the long run. I hate how easily and quickly he changes his mind when actual logic is put into perspective of his plans and how quick he is to dismiss someone else when they don't please him anymore or things don't go his way for the smallest things. And yes, that is part of his character, I know that. That is what makes him as scummy as he is and why I love how trashy he is. But I also can't ignore just how easily he pushed skekVar away and believed skekSil despite knowing just what a lying bastard he is. IDK, it just feels too obvious but at the same time, it is what it is and I am not upset about it in the least x)

Favorite episode (scene if movie): Honestly, I enjoyed all the scenes with him in the show but mostly in particular with his interactions with skekVar, especially towards the end of the series. It showed a peak part of his vulnerability in his character that honestly I doubt he ever shows to anyone else. He spends most of his time pushing others around and making them fear him but with skekVar there is a sort of mutual respect going that really speaks out in a different way. Maybe I am just reading too much into it, but I always did enjoy how they interacted with one another!

Favorite season/movie: Well, skekSo didn't get much screen time in the movie other then him dying and turning to dust so.... Definitely enjoyed him more in the show then the film xD

Favorite line: "NOOOOO!" (Yes, this scene is still very infamous to me for personal reasons but the way he carried out his "no's" cracked me up each time xD)

Favorite outfit: Honestly, the main outfit he wore throughout the show. It's just so regal and goth, I love it! And as a goth and fashion enthusiast myself, I am all up for the style he has! The battle armor he wore near the end made it a tad more laughable to be honest.

OTP: I started shipping him with skekVar but ended up with an OT3 of skekVar and skekZok. So now all three of them live in a happy relationship with each other in my noodle~

Brotp: I see him being on neutral terms with skekMal!

Head Canon: I feel that even in the show it wasn’t seen or given, but he did feel a lot of remorse and regret after the loss of skekVar. He seemed very close with him and spoke with skekVar with more trust then he did the others. Perhaps in secret he did mourn the General’s loss.

Unpopular opinion: Does this count as an unpopular opinion? I know most people see him with just a few strands of hair but I tend to see him with a head full of long flowing white locks he keeps hidden beneath his clothes. It adds to the extra layer of vanity for a proud Emperor such as he! He looses it over time the darkening consumes him and withers down his health.

A wish: To see what he was like as an urSkek prior to being split up into a Skeksis and urRu. Yeah, I know people don't care or like the urSkeks all that much but honestly, I would LOVE to see more urSkek lore and see what it was that made SoSu so special among his peers. It was said, after all, he had a voice that could move the stars but was conflicted and consumed with darkness. Honestly, I want to know why and who he was prior to all of this mess! SkekSo even says in the show he still has nightmares of the life before so I wonder, what they were and how it was! So much potential here, man!

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: I don’t think I have any of these to be honest? At least with skekSo. Not that I can think of on top of my head now.

5 words to best describe them: Proud, absolute piece of shit, pretty, conniving, and menacing.

My nickname for them: Stupid idiot

#Matla answers #non doodle reply #skekso #baron dark #father ariandel #headcanon territory

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artreider · 3 years

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Station 19 returns in a little over 2 weeks so im going to try to finish my rewatch this week.

Im doing todays rewatch while my daughter plays we'll see if i can work this out.

This is one one of my favorite episodes but im liable to cry watching it again.

Ugh dixon why cant we have lost him this season.

I love the family talks between the crew to start the episode and jack with his seemingly random trivia/information that he just feels like educating his team about.

Poor vic you can see how much she is struggling as the news is on and her crew discusses protesting and police brutality.

I love what Montgomery says that things felt different right after george floyd and breonna taylor were killed, like something was going to change. But now a year plus out i cant help but feel like nothing is really changing, like we all forgot what we saw.

I do love their shirts.

Oh maya trying to navigate being there for her team, doing whats right and whats expected of her. I don't envy her. Also its all in vain and she came so far and is the best captain.

Hughes wanting to change the subject and celebrate marina's engagement, i love her but my heart hurts for her. I also love the support for maya from her team.

I know some fans take issue with vic calling it a lesbian wedding but im onebof those who isnt. That comes from a bisexual woman married to a bisexual woman who normally just tells people she is gay or a lesbian because ita simpler. And also because you can sometimes avoid the inevitable question of why did i choose a woman instead of a man.

I love the i could barely agree to get carina to marriage line and i dont know why.

There's hererra eating away lol; either they just had fun messing with fans or really planned the long game pregnancy. Is it possible we'll see glimpses of her pregnancy in flashbacks this season and then she'll have a baby in present day. This could've been their way of getting around having to film a pregnancy over the course of a season and keeping andy in the action. Hmmm

Vic and travis, i love them. Im glad travis trying to get vic to open up. I just want to hug vic so much, i cant imagine what she's going through.

Barrett kills this episode.

Bishop is right, vic cant be objective she needs to foucs on her family and trust her team.

I love watching maya captain.

Asshole kids.

Vic talking about her team is love. In light of the following episode i wish we could've had them all be introduced to her folks on screen. Also i need fics of how the wedding came to be at the restuarant and just marina month apart after becoming engaged.

Ugh between the popo and news its like vultures outside the fire. Also the portrayal of the news pisses me off as a news producer. Thats not to say some news stations may have agendas or some reporters an inability to seperate themselves from the story but in my experience that is few and far between.

"Fire" "whatever your question is the answer is fire and we are working to put it out" ugh i love the bde and quote from maya. And the "buhbye" so much love here.

These officers are out of line, if you cant do your job properly then hand in your badge you pos. Love the female officer here, ill take more of her. Clearly she has no issue with the station or the lawsuit.

Im glad dean listened to maya and didnt question her. I also just realized she said "ill deal with pd", such a good captain putting herself between the pos and her team.

As maya watches vic and her family you can just see her heart going out to them.

Ugh vic you need all the hugs, also mama hughes is so stubborn lol but i love her.

I love them ribbing on andy about eating and her choice of food as well as her loud stomach rumbles.

Too much bad news delivered by emails/texts to the team.

Its not fair the team seems upset with maya about the city's decision.

Perv andy lol also totally pregnant. Also the look she gave sullivan when they were on their way to the fire just screamed i know im pregnant and love my baby daddy.

Theo means well and im glad travis is letting him help.

Sometimes moms say things and mean well but they just dont come across right.

Stupid news reporter.

I love this scene and mama hughes. "Let it burn" so succinct. She is an icon. The recitement of the names never fails to bring tears to my eyes.

That her parents know the names rings differently for vic, its like she feels seen amd that maybe they werent as unaware as they came across.

Jack seems so lost and is just trying to understand the world and himself. I just want him to find his purpose and happiness. I swear it just seems like he'll be the next person killed off after finding his happiness.

I love the boards dedicated to vic, just goes to show sometimes parents care more than they seem and are just not good at showing it. They are so proud of her.

Them both telling just a second made me chuckle so much.

The apology may not bring back michael but its important none the less.

Im glad maya checked on dean. And the solution they came up with. Side note danielle looks so good in this scene, i may have a crush.

Fhe breath she takes when he stops her from leaving, it hurts me. I take it as she is bracing herself for the worst especially when he says he doesnt want to be disrespectful. Its still hard for her to believe she has the teams unwavering support. I love dean telling maya to have a wedding for her station.

The breaking the plates scene i love it. Love the conversations between vic and her mom.

The breaking of the plates, such love.

#station 19 #victoria hughes #barrett doss #travis montgomery #ben warren #robert sullivan #andy herrera #jack gibson #dean miller #maya bishop

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shattered-catalyst · 3 years

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OCD Subtypes for the RPC

Part 1 is here

Well well well, we are back for Part 2 of the Roleplayer’s Guide to OCD.

Fellow Ocd Folks, I see you in those tags and I'm going to do my best to ensure those obsessions are represented here- BUT understand that physically it is not going to be possible to list every single one because I am one person. Regardless its incredibly brave of you all to rb and add things in the tags, I know its hard to talk about this shit and I see you. I see you.

Resultantly I typed this out and posted it in formatting to assist with accessibility in mind; if you cannot read it still ( I tried Im sorry!) i recommend the copy and paste method or getting the chrome extension bee-line reader.

There will be grammatical and spelling mistakes. Im sure spacing is odd some places, but you have to understand doing this is extremely anxiety provoking for me so Im just getting it done when I can.

Remember to use your critical thinking; not everyone has the same symptoms/compulsions/triggers and all that.

OCD is fluid. Its like liquid mercury. One day its a handful of subtypes another day its another different serving.

If you are in general squicked about certain topics even by mention read ahead with your own judgement. Remember us folks that have OCD have many disturbing and distressing experiences so if you are writing a character who has OCD and you can’t read about it just don’t give them that obsessive thought/ compulsion. Make sure writing is still a safe and enjoyable hobby for yourself first and foremost.

But ethically and morally I cannot and will not leave out the more disturbing bits. You have the ability to scroll by, I and many others do not get the chance to escape triggering content that our own mind creates.

So read ahead with your best judgement or at least skip around the squicky parts and educate yourself on what OCD is so people quite using it as a Obsessive Christmas/Corgi/Cat Disorder thing. Alright? Cool beans.

Okay so you made it passed post 1 and got under the read more. Give yourself a gold star for diving into this monster of a document.

Below is a crash course it is not meant to replace actual psychoeducation, personal research, or google. Honestly most of us do our research extensively but because OCD is treated so horribly by social media, media, and society in general.

I wasn’t sure where to throw these together because the education tools to learn fully about OCD are very specialized and thus very restricted. I found that many people DO have these experiences with OCD though so I will represent them throughout. I’ll also sprinkle some of my own experiences so you can get a good reference of a person who has the disorder and not just a randomly generated person.

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So OCD is made up of Obsessions, Trigger, Intrusive thought, Misinterpretation/feared consequence,Somatic and Psychological Anxiety, and Compulsions/Rituals.

Your character may not be able to list all of these. In fact if they aren't in ERP therapy they may not be able to puzzle these things out. But YOU as the writer should know them. Your character won’t be walking around talking to just ANYONE that they have OCD. Remember a huge aspect of OCD is it’s Shame. The disorder makes us feel intense shame regarding our intrusive thoughts, as a result OCD goes undiagnosed for years especially if it has pediatric onset.

We won’t tell anyone what we are experiencing or why we are doing x y or z. We act like nothing is wrong because to emotionally react is to admit to yourself- and therefore the world- that you have had this intrusive thought and are therefore by virtue a horrible person.[For further information I would suggest also researching PANDAS].

It may be noticeable if your character has an intrusive thought. They may wince or grimace or roll their eyes certainly, but they won’t open up to Joe at the cafe about how their brain is constantly torturing them. I apparently have a very noticeable eye twitch.

Depending on the nature of the intrusive thought it will get more or less of a reaction out of me. Its usually dependent on how distressing the intrusive thought is and/or if its a new one.

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You see OCD doesn’t sit still. It never looks the same. You’ll have your long haul intrusive thoughts that are with you for years but then you’ll have weird ass ones that just appear and demand their voice be heard yelling about cars hitting people or squirrels getting eaten.

Some people have similar ones! So while everyone is different there will always be someone out there with an intrusive thought similar to yours.

For instance; I bonded emotionally with a lady on reddit because we both have intrusive thoughts during storms that animals and the homeless are dying. We were both horribly relieved to find another person and also distressed that every snow or rain storm brings horrible images and whispers to your mind that while you are warm and snug in bed someone is freezing to death. And its all your fault.

Some days are better than others. As with all mental illnesses it isn’t CONSTANT ALARM BELLS. Some days it will be all alarms and other days it will be like a gentle whisper on the breeze. You can almost not notice it. Almost.

Obsessive thoughts run the gauntlet from ‘i will/could have/may/may accidentally harm etc’ something that you hold of value. This is any obsessive thought that you have: you think about repeatedly and not by choice, it is very anxiety provoking, it is unwanted, and unwelcome.

Mine run the scale from ‘squirrel will be murdered’ to ‘being responsible for harm’.

Compulsions or ‘rituals’ are any behavior done to alleviate the anxiety from the intrusive thought and trigger object. In short, compulsions and rituals are not fun. they are absolutely not logical, and we know they are not logical but we are forced to do them. Thats why its a disorder.

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To emphasize from post 1: magical thinking and the faulty link between thoughts and actions are hallmarks of OCD. Magical thinking can be anything from contamination to if I turn around three times or stare really hard at something the bad thing wont happen. Sounds weird and is weird and we know it is thats why its a disorder and not a delusion.

The faulty belief that thought=action is the biggest hurdle it is incredibly difficult to grasp, at least for me maybe some of you that have done further ERP can attest, that the mere concept of a thought not being the same as an action is completely and totally mind blowing.

Free will? Yeah thats terrifying. IDK about anyone else but free will is absolutely terrifying; what do you mean i could do anything i wanted?

Thats how you face OCD(WITH A TRAINED THERAPIST). You give in to ambiguity and the unknown. Its breaking that link between thought and action. Its incredibly difficult and draining. A five minute exposure leaves me in shatters for a week and two five minute ones had me ripping my nails past the nail beds with anxiety.

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Just a reminder: Do not have your character expose themself or expose folks with OCD to a trigger to “ help us get over with”. That is literally forcing someone with a mental illness into a break down and is not helpful. In fact its worse because a person knows about this intrusive thought and they tried to make it real. More shame and some trauma.

If you have OCD, more likely than not a family member or significant other has tried this with the purest of intentions. But it never works like that. Theres a reason that therapists get special training for this. If people want a post on ERP I can make one at some point.

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Actually let’s drag me with the squirrel thing as the example- fellow OCD Folks get out a pen and paper and try breaking down one of yours;

Obsession:Squirrel will be murdered

Trigger: seeing a squirrel

Intrusive thought: Graphic images of a squirrel being murdered by a hawk/ impaling depending on the day

Misinterpretation/feared consequence: Squirrel will be killed and its all my fault

Somatic and Psychological Anxiety:intense anxiety, palms sweating, heart racing,

Compulsions/Rituals: Must stare at the squirrel to prevent bad things from happening,

Now imagine if that is every time you see a fucking squirrel. You have somehow become completely and totally transfixed on a squirrel and nothing is going to pull your attention away or the squirrel dies- which your mind is giving you lovely images of btw.

Cute right?

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Below are the subtypes with general information/example thoughts/ and how some of these have impacted me socially because apparently some people dont understand that mental illnesses impact their social lives?? yall...

Social: This can range from ‘ i am constantly thinking i did something wrong so i have to ask for reassurance that we are still friends’ to completely unrealistic worries. Maybe its an intrusive thought that ‘ your voice is annoying them’ . There’s reassurance seeking, internal and external checking.

It makes friendships extremely difficult and exhausting. You’re not trying to get to know someone with an annoying frat boy egging on anxiety in your brain. This can also manifest as having strict rules for yourself and ethical codes.

My therapist likes to say she could give us (folks with OCD) a pile of hundred dollar bills and come back and they’d all be returned. Because OCD makes you so strict and morally confined. Which ISNT fun. Like I dont get pleasure over having to memorize the entire Code of Conduct!

Social Media: Its the bane of human existence some days and a lifeline the next. But what if everytime your follower count was an odd/even number it sent you into a panic attack. What if you spent all your time with intrusive thoughts that somehow someone misinterpreted a post or that someone is going to be harmed by a post you made about tapirs.

You may be forced to block people to get your number down or keep pornbots on your blog to keep your number what you like (see there is a use for them! We sacrifice those before actual users!) You may be refreshing your page every second because ‘what if you miss a message’. It's going to look a lot like ‘check check check check reassure yourself double check your posts check check check reassure check check FALSE MEMORY check your post etc’

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Clothing/Body Image: When its not Body Dysmorphia it can be OCD. Sometimes this looks like I obsess about a body part and therefore I choose my clothes/hairstyles to hide those. Some personal examples: as a kid I was sure that mind readers exist ( THIS IS AN OCD THING TOO I was so relieved to find that out) and that if i didnt wear a particular hat they would see all these horrible thoughts and it would be revealed what an awful person I was. So I wore the same dumb ass bucket hat for a year (or more I cannot remember but it was a long ass time).

I was once so fixated on being given a compliment on my eye color that I wore sunglasses (even at night) to a summer camp. And if any of those teen girls in that cabin that stood up and mocked me in a crowded lunch hall by singing ‘i wear my sunglasses at night’ you all owe me 40$.

Even younger still I had intrusive thoughts. Like say, if anyone noticed I was female that i would be kidnapped so I chopped my hair very short. I altered my appearance to be very androgynous and even switched to walking more masculine. Because omg if your hips move someones going to kill you thats just how it works. ( It doesnt help I later figured out I was a lesbian)

Your wardrobe may be impacted by OCD and yes so can your body image.

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Also yes the fear of mind readers is also a thing; i always thought I was somehow faking OCD because yes that is also a…..

Faking: Do you value telling the truth? Do you detest lying ? Boy Howdy do I have some news for you. OCD is going to try and convince you that YOU LIED. Whether it was on a chastity pledge to get a free sandwich or in a conversation you just HAD. This links a lot with false memory OCD.

Another aspect is OCD makes us doubt we have OCD and tries to convince us we have any other diagnosis under the sun and we are obviously faking our OCD.

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Sexual Orientation OCD; It is as it is called. Sexual Orientation OCD is what happens when your brain goes ‘hold on what if you’re not this orientation what if you are THAT’. It doesn’t matter where on the LGBT umbrella you fall you will have OCD trying to convince you otherwise. From compulsive staring at members of the same/opposite gender to compulsively reassuring or checking with yourself to ensure that ‘ no no you are in fact THIS orientation.’

This can range in behavior from binge watching porn, staring compulsively to check that there is OR is NOT attraction,self checking past experiences and memories, analyzing your clothing and your lifestyle in painful and intricate methods.

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False Memory OCD; False memory OCD is basically your brain sitting you in a noir interrogation room, handcuffing you to a chair grilling you. It demands that you did *insert bad thing here*. This can range from anything from something Harm based to pretty much *anything* from other OCD subtypes. Which is quite delightful really.

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Sensorimotor OCD; Sensorimotor OCD is obsessive body responses. These can be ‘ I have to cough really hard and really feel it right in my chest and if I can’t get it right I have to cough until I do’. This can be counting your heartbeats. Trying to check yourself that you in fact have a heart and checking and reassuring that it is still beating. It can be hyper-awareness of swallowing or even swallowing repeatedly. It is anything with selective attention; ie its an automated process but your OCD is forcing you to be aware of it.

Your OCD makes you aware of the sensation of, say, breathing, and then it convinces you that if you stop paying attention to it you will stop breathing. So now you’re horribly aware and focused solely on breathing and breathing alone. It keeps me up most nights with the pounding anxiety fueled by the pressure of ‘if you stop focusing on breathing you will stop breathing completely’ or waiting to feel that last heartbeat in your chest.

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Existential OCD; You ever feel existential ? Existential OCD is like having a very aggressive existential crisis that turns you into NEEDING answers IMMEDIATELY. This can look anything from hours panic scrolling the net to panic inducing anxiety because you don't know what happens after death. The thoughts are like foghorns on a misty sea.

This sounds basic and the only example i can give is as a teeny tiny 7 year old I had a panic attack in bed screaming that ‘ what if im a dinosaur and im asleep and i wake up and my whole family is GONE’.

To be fair I did like dinosaurs a lot.

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Harm OCD; This is pretty self explanatory but I will give more details. Harm OCD is OCD demanding that you will/could/can/may have/might harmed yourself/others/any living creature and that you alone are responsible.

This means anything from getting anxious driving over crosswalks because ‘what if you dont see one and hit someone and its all your fault and you hit someone go back and make sure you havent hit anyone’ to ‘im holding a knife so im going to accidentally stab someone’ to ‘ i didnt see my cat this morning and now im at work and think she must be dead and i am responsible for her demise.’

It can be as simple as ‘if i use a pencil i will stab myself in the eye’ or as complex as ‘ i may accidentally say a slur’/ ‘ i am going to say this horrible thing out loud if i cannot control myself.’ It can also be images of terror or racist/sexist/ableist jokes in your mind that repeat like a broken record.

(Please note from section 1 that this is extremely anxiety provoking and not something you would do. OCD preys on what we respect the most.)

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pOCD; Tumblr listen the fuck up because I am tired of seeing people get called shit on this website for having this mental illness. People who experience pOCD are not pedophiles, they do not get any pleasure or benefit. The thoughts and images are meant to induce harm to the person experiencing them. Children are normally the trigger for this and the resulting images can be very graphic. Again you aren’t attracted to children- thoughts of them getting harmed hurt you so your OCD makes you see them.

Know this so you can advocate for folks with pOCD in real life. Remember we are here. We are suffering and we are terrified of your children.

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Poisoning others/or in your food; Life isn’t medieval anymore but sometimes OCD demands we have a food taster or that we obsessively worry that we may kill someone with our cooking. Personally I struggle with colorblindness so I am constantly fretful over cooking any sort of meat so it’s difficult for me to cook it.

However this also comes as; obsessive horrible thoughts of your cooking kill someone or that you have somehow/accidentally poisoned someone’s food (even if you haven’t touched it or been within a foot of it ) or that someone has poisoned YOUR food even if no one has touched it except you. You’re going to be picking apart your food or unable to eat out at all.

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Emotional Contamination: It’s similar to magical thinking and this terrifying prospect of mind readers. Emotional contamination can manifest as anything from intense worry over somehow gaining someone else’s negative personality traits.

Or that somehow by interacting with any role of someone horrible will make YOU somehow also responsible for the horribleness. There is usually a person or a type of person that is a trigger, but it can also be location based.

This is one subtype where magical thinking and superstition are apparent.

For instance; as a teen if a male was in my space or had physical contact;like shaking hands,giving a high five, being in my room etc. I would have to go around and physically touch all the objects that I perceive they may have also touched as a way to cancel out their presence.

This includes wiping off myself to negate even the touch of family members. It really hurts peoples feelings, my father was especially hurt by this.

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Physical Contamination: This goes beyond physical dirt and grime. Most of us dont have spotless homes because if you’re having a fist fight with your brain everyday cleaning falls by the wayside just like it would for anyone else. Physical contamination holds 2 things: physical contamination obsessions AND compulsive cleaning behaviors/rituals. We believe that a small amount of a contaminate can cover large surfaces.

Oh, and did I mention its not JUST dirt/germs/viruses. The list is expansive but heres a mixed bag of what they can be: sticky substances,dead animals,glitter (FUCKING GLITTER),negative words or language,colors, numbers, surfaces in general, food, people, and activities. There is also a hyper responsibility to protect yourself and others from ‘contamination’.

Strangely there is a magical separation between the contaminated world and the ‘clean’ one. Spaces designated as clean would be a bedroom/bathroom/workspace where you are most active. That space is where the compulsions and intrusive thoughts occur. Its not I MUST CLEAN EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME. Otherwise I would be working cleaning houses because why the hell not amiright?

A real world example from a colleague would be a young man with physical contamination OCD is struck with such intrusive thoughts about cleaning that they refuse to allow anyone in their room or any animals in their home. But they are not able to even flush the toilet, take out the trash, wash dishes, or do garbage because of their intrusive thoughts.

The most famous would be compulsive hand washing but I feel it is important to also note OTHER aspects of physical contamination because everyone sees the hand scrubbing stereotype.

Other compulsions include intricate rituals, not touching the floor (i played X-treme the floor is lava during college. I couldnt let my feet touch the floor because it was ‘dirty’),excessive showering (2-8+ hour showers guys, 8 hour showers. Thats what we’re talking about.)

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Relationship OCD: This comes as no surprise that yes you will have intrusive thoughts that you are somehow harming/ will harm/ may accidentally harm your significant other. Whether that be by physical or emotional means. It can look like ‘ I may have lied to her about how much I love her’, ‘ i may not actually love her and I may be leading her on’, and ‘ I must be corrupting her’. These can extend to certain physical activities with false memory OCD as a cherry on top. A great finishing garnish to leave you feeling absolutely dismayed and unable to trust your own perception.

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Scrupulosity: Religion! Whatever that may be! Its a thing with OCD. With Scrupulosity obsessive thoughts run all over the board from; you committed a sin and forgot about it you monster to having to pray continuously/ a certain time/ until its right. What is right?Ask OCD that’s the only person who knows.

We are fairly certain my grandfather had OCD because he went to church for every single Catholic Mass. Every single day. Every. Single. Day. That’s not a healthy amount of attendance(I'm calling you out posthumously because I care Robert!). This can also look like: praying a certain amount of times. Praying until you do it ‘right’. Confessing every single potential sin. Cataloguing and dwelling over ‘sinful’ things.

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Symmetry or Just Right OCD: Symmetry OCD is the runner up for ‘most likely recognized on tv shows’ award.

Symmetry OCD convinces you that if *insert thing here* isnt symmetrical or ‘just right’ (a magical position or number of objects that makes 0 logical sense) that something bad will happen.

This can range from the known; rearranging things. But it also looks like buying more objects until you reach the right amount and even throwing out objects if theres ‘too many’.

It can range from ‘the walls are percievably not straight so now i avoid that room at all costs otherwise i will be trapped traveling the edges of the wall with my eyes otherwise it will fall in and murder us ALL.’ to ‘ this historical bust is one inch off to the left and now all i see is visions of it breaking against the ground.’

So that is what I have time for. 9 pages on subtypes and basic information. If you find yourself wanting me information all of this is easily accessible online. So go, be free and dont ever compare people to Monk again. Write Batman and Scott Summers with OCD. Give us ACTUAL representation and not throw away joke lines. We are here. Our suffering isnt funny. We deserve representation too.

#OCD #writing help #OCD resources.#*drops 10 pages onto your dash* whoops

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nobody-knose--archive · 3 years

Text

i’ve been aching to commentate spirit phone’s commentary for ages. glad i finally got around to it, this was an ejoyable experience. liveblog below the cut

-i'm like half certain i've heard this commentary before. maybe not the whole way through & it was probably actual years ago

-nice hearing stuff like this. in-depth personal view of the album-making process. makes it seem like more of a real thing i could do myself someday

-neil cicierega real person momence

-i could probably go real in depth about neil cicierega/tally hall parallels specifically concerning like. the arc of their musical careers. but i won't, here

-wild how i legitimately don't care much about micheal jackson

-didnt we get a bunch of spirit phone stems from the needlejuice release/his patreon? we could probably hear the funny track he speaks of here in that

-i love hearing musical artists, especially neil cicierega, talking about the meanings of their songs. like, not only has this song been claimed to hell & back by the tumblr gays, but with later ones i just can't see where he gets these ideas from. also, claiming there's any one meaning or plot to a song just seems silly to me

-shoutout to neil reusing a midi from like, 1998, that he made at 12 years old, whose entire melody was reused for the main verses of everybody loves raymond. loved finding that out on my own 2 years ago. now it's common trivia in this fandom. not bad times

-it'd be neat if neil did individual trans tracks here like he did with view monstel, those things are half of why i consider it my favorite album

-it's a lot easier to ignore the creator's intended meaning behind a song when he can't even remember it. thanks neil

-seesaw effect

-and there's my joke all but 1 of my followers wont get. moving on

-what kinds of movie theater lobbies has neil been to where there are arcade machines. i mean im not one to talk but that does sound rather strange

-why do songs' titles even need to be taken from the lyrics. ive never seen that as any sort of requisite. it's like titling any form of prose you can just give it whatever name ya like

-"this part sounds pretty cool right"

-is neil's vocal range only mildly better than mine? with training i could change that

-oh i haven't processed any of the last 25 seconds hold on

-god. a shit ton of vocal modification in this song. it's like neil returned to his roots but with quality this time

-i, as an ace/aro, have never related more to an allohet guy in my life. what is the point of eyes!

-professional humming/whistling takes skill. it's different from the recreational or casual stuff. i'd know

-there's a name for the way sound (especially music) gets distorted when moving past you and i can't remember it but it's probably what neil's referring to here in the way he recorded the intro

(- update: it's the doppler effect no need to tell me cas already did)

-as someone who hasnt seen the rugrats or take me there by blackstreet i'll just say it sounded like a bouncy music box melody. nice to hear a song that messes with the typical scales though. lydian & diatonic.

-that's a rather specific thing to be glad about, but given what he talked about in his last full audio commentary about the jew harp i suppose i'm not surprised

-i know that tmbg song now. listened to it & saw the music video too. yep they're different alright

-where the hell does neil get all these instrumence from anyway

-huh. hadnt heard this part of the commentary before making my oc concerning this song but i like to hear neil's approval concerning part of my interpretation

-i love how ive heard a billion different tellings of this mellified man story from lem dem fans talking about this song and neil's is by far the wildest

-good god that does only make it worse neil

-i love making liveblogs of lemon demon albums. with the fullerenes or tally hall i cant name a specific dude to take out my woes on generally but with lemon demon i can just say neil all the time. i like being on a casual first name basis with this dude ive never interacted with once ever

-is sweet bod the one other than cabinet man with a demo in the bonus tracks? i forget

-holy shit the boston molasses disaster someone call up soapy if it doesnt already know, it'd love this

-two thousand nine. god i miss the fiddle solo. the ver with it is truly the best one

-he pronounces it jeff? i've always read it as gef with a hard g. that's what i get for knowing words that are never spoken aloud

-that's a fun meta interpretation of this ghost story that's over a century old. i like that

-i've noticed neil generally does the same synths across a whole album. it's especially more clear in the earlier ones, and does mean i occasionally mix up songs between clown circus & live from the haunted candle shop

-ah! ancient aliens! my least favorite track on this album. i cant even claim to have the least interest in a popular one i've just generally not liked this one much from the beginning. so im curious to see what neil's got to say, i think ive been in ~new commentary zone for a while now

-anyway. newest update on the loolin not realizing a song's funky time signature front: i think this one's in 6/4. or at least switches a lot between time signatures. granted i dont listen to it very often for the reasons stated above

-see the way neil describes it. eldritch horror upon being visited by the unknown at a time when humanity'd hadn't even yet had a chance to imagine such a thing occurring. should be right up my alley. but the sound itself & many of the lyrics simply turn me away.

-must i specify i don't dislike it? spirit phone is neil's best album it not being my favorite doesn't mean i think it's bad yadda yadda nobody should be surprised by this it's not like anyone in these fandoms reads my liveblogs <3

-granted i think this is. the first bit of spirit phone content i've made on my blog ever. so who knows things can change <3

-the transitions in spirit phone are much less view-monster transition tracks & more extended outros. view-monster's were a bit more intro than outro sure but they also seemed directed upon making a 2-way rather than 1-way bridge between tracks. or something like that

-.............soft fuzzy man is an incredible nickname for a cat. i'd steal that if i werent afraid of introducing my relatives to lemon demon

-jirls

-an underlying metaphor is good enough. the literal side of the lyrics are fun. nothing but agreement here neil my good man

-the transition into as your father i expressly forbid it from soft fuzzy man is the best one in this album

-buddy you ask if a musical idea has been used before odds are the answer is yes in this day & age the question is has it been used in the way you're using it. like sure this soul jazz record from the 60s that was sold out in kansas stores for a week used this bassline that youve found yourself copying. but seeing as youre using it in some angsty garage rock ballad type tune does anybody actually care

-doesn't everybody like to say things in an unhinged manner from time to time

-imagine having a guitar dad, i say, with my dad being a folk accordion/fiddle dad, which is infinitely worse in every way

-i think he was in an actual folk band at some point. idk the 90s were weird

-iron my life?

-m-more intimate? there are a lot of ways i'd describe this song but intimate isn't one of them. granted as your father is negatively intimate so from there i guess you've got nowhere to go but up

-...still glad to see his interpretation kinda supports my oc at least

-the way he says characters in songs shouldn't worry about death really strongly makes me think this is some sort of. thematic continuation of stuck from dinosaurchestra, even if there's no real death in there. interesting. would also mean that the dad from these past 2 songs is named carlos betty (no last name)

-i literally never assumed this was a flute solo. piccolo at best. it's pretty clearly a recorder

-my mom plays the recorder. i wonder if she can play recorder better than neil cicierega

-we can throw a party in honor of the crushing weight of responsibility! i simply won't be the one throwing it because i have enough on my plate already <3

-what the hell does "a sense of intent" mean

-i've never heard rush before however i disagree with neil's understanding of 6/4. 6/4 is meant to have emphasis (onbeat or another term i can't remember) on the 1st & 4th beat of every measure, which is greatly different from a measure of 4/4 then a measure of 2/4. it's why his 5/4 always sounds weird, because while it's recognizable in sequences of 10/4, it's more 2 measures of 4/4 with one of 2/4 tacked on the end. that's also how it's different from 3/4. i don't know much music theory but what i do understand i will fight to the death about

-"canonized" that's. a very interesting term to use when referring to a former president

-from now on i will interpret every love song directed at some unseen "you" to be inviting me to marry them for tax purposes. thanks neil for being an aromantic icon

-ah hell yes hell yes man-made object is my favorite goddam song on this album

-short & sweet & good damn vibes. neil's thoughts on it all are only making it better

-wild how he uses very few vocal effects for a song that he clearly is straining his vocal range for. go off neil

-the qualifier of man-made is a wonderful thing. oldest or biggest thing? oldest or biggest man-made thing? what a incredibly important specification. a world of possibilities lie between the two. oh i love it

-just gets me thinking yknow! what we consider weird/impressive in another species, in our own species- what kind of equivalent to that would there be from an outsider looking in? are there alien versions of the significances we place upon things, that we could never imagine? the limits of the human imagination mean we could never conceive of something else in the world that isn't, in some way great or small, just like us- and are we wrong for thinking that? such a juicy topic i wish there were a name for it because it's kinda hard to explain concisely

-spiral of ants. my second favorite song from this album, in fact. a good one to experience

-the vocals are just another instrument. they really truly are. i wasn't going into this commentary expecting to feel solidarity for neil cicierega in this chili's tonight on more than one occasion but here i am.

-like, his whole stance on interpreting songs is something i agree with almost entirely. you can take it at face value, you can dig to their very depths, you can listen to songs without caring what the lyrics mean whatsoever, and those are all fun. & yeah while any of these people can be annoying as one of the types who enjoys gliding on the surface more than anything i find those who dedicate themselves to figuring out the whole meaning of a song over anything else to be both slightly scary & slightly annoying <3 keep up the good work

-i want to make songs for my siblings the way neil makes songs for his sibling(s)

-spinch

-neil really shouldn't be allowed to be this funny like this whole album youre thinking golly! he's just a normal man this neil cicierega! and then he starts listing the cat hacks jokes & you remember he's had ridiculously consistent viral success with all his humorous endeavors and holy shit it's neil cicierega in action talking about his music. god bless you neil

-you're welcome, no problem, my pleasure. good eveternoon, radio audience!

#lemon demon #spirit phone #pretty sure this is my first bit of spirit phone content on my blog. hi greater lem dem fandom nice to see y'all. go listen to deporitaz #loolin liveblogs #i enjoyed this less for the content the commentary contained & more for the way i handled it. more pleasant than some times ive had #tis i #i havent listened to spirit phone in general in ages. i know why. so this was nice #to the world and back again

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helisol · 3 years

Text

again not a finished fic but very extensive notes, this one’s a chonker, 4k words

tl;dr: take it a ds9 but make it into high fantasy wizards. garashir, kiradax and quodo. we’ve got it all here folks.

SO BASICALLY

I read a book about a young witch apprentice in a world where every magician has a ~special name~ based on an object/plant/animal they’re spiritually connected to.

then I watched ds9 and got introduced to the concept of cardassians being lizards.

the result- wizard lizard.

So Garak “The Lizard” is a mage that got exiled from his home country and ended up taking a pretty neat job in a rural area of a larger empire where being a wizard is Cool and Widely Accepted.

his duties include keeping the villages around his tower safe, looking for young mages to turn into apprentices, and sometimes making clothes because he’s Still A Tailor.

however, because of his chronic “i no wanna work” disease, this lizard has not actually been looking around the villages near him for magically gifted children. shame on him.

because through his negligence Julian Bashir, young village doctor, grew up without even knowing that he can do ~magic~

but he soon finds out when his town gets attacked by a Big Evil Magic Monster. The Lizard is taking his sweet time to come to their rescue and Julian can’t just sit by and watch innocent people get mauled by a Chimera or Giant Mantis.

So Julian does the heroic thing and jumps inbetween a wounded child and the monster in the exact second Garak shows up.

And he gets to watch as Julian unleashes some Magic for the first time.

Then Garak Kind Of Abducts Julian So He Can Teach Him Magic

Garak is contractually obligated and allowed to take on anyone who is capable of magic as an apprentice, and he finds Julian’s magic interesting enough to invoke that contract now. Not Julian himself though. Only his magic. for now.

Julian- for like, the first week- is NOT OKAY with being teleported into a tower fortress by a wizard he finds intimidating and scary, and he loudly protests when Garak actually starts to teach him magic spells.

However, this is Julian, and he *is* intrigued by the thought of being able to use magic For Doing Good.

So one night he admits defeat and slinks up to the tower and goes “Okay. Compromise. Teach me healing magic.”

To which Garak is like 👀 “Okay.”

They start having regular magic lessons mostly focused on healing, which Julian is just naturally good at. So they move on to other things. Which Julian is Not naturally good at.

And he becomes very frustrated.

Garak tries to assuage him and says that he doesn’t have to be accomplished in every single field and discipline- which is logically true- but Julian is having none of it since Garak is accomplished in every field.

In a fit of anger Julian unleashes emotional magic again and breaks some of Garak’s things. Books, vials, a desk, nothing super major. But Julian is still surprised and shocked at himself for causing trouble like this and he Runs Away. Straight up exits stage left.

And Garak, who just got flung against the wall by his little apprentice, just rushes to the window and looks as Julian runs away and he is. Disappointed.

Next we have Julian returning home and everyone is like "Doctor!!! You were gone for half a year???" And Julian is like "I thought I was only gone for a month at most-"

Yeah the joke is time flies when you’re having fun because Julian *did* have fun living with Garak. He doesn’t regret leaving though, after all Garak was probably furious after he wrecked his study he wasn’t.

So Julian says to himself "Hmph. I'll just stay home for a week. Garak will hardly notice I'm gone. And then I can make it up to him."

But Then He Stays For A Whole Month

He has to instruct a new doctor to take over the nearby villages, do some paperwork, help some sick people, practice some magic on his own- and at the end of the month He Doesn’t Want To Stay Any Longer.

He’s always been different from the other village people, and now he finally got a taste of what it’s like to have someone help you to achieve your potential and widen your horizon and he *doesn’t* want to give that up for a boring but busy country life.

So back to the tower it is. Julian arrives, the place is kind of messy, and when he finds Garak he is in his study. on the floor. a little drunk, definitely sad, and Very Surprised To See Him.

Here we get a scene where Garak tipsily tells Julian how much he’s grown to appreciate him, not just for his magic talent, but as a person- and that he’s missed him.

But The Next Morning Garak Does Not Remember

And he's just like "Oh Julian. Youre back. I'd almost forgotten about you."

For a second Julian wants to punch a wall because *Yesterday You Told Me You Missed Me*, but then he just Smiles. settles for what they have right now. and asks Garak to continue teaching him magic.

so they go on. and have. so many gay moments.

And then Garak gets told to attend some kind of magic council meeting/banquet.

Julian says something along the lines of "Oh well, guess I'll stay home. You know, protect the fort. Practice magic." but he's a little sad about it.

But garak just goes "Hmm No. I'm taking you with me"

"What-" "I'm introducing you as my apprentice to the magic council." "W h a t-" "Oh also you need pretty clothes for this so I'm gonna make you some. Since you’re a commoner with no actual taste." "W H A T-"

So garak makes a really nice suit for Julian and for himself they match and they go to the Cool Wizard Banquet.

At which Julian meets a lot of wizards and witches and he's like "Wow this is so exciting!" but he also realises he is a Total Country Bumpkin And Noob compared to these people and their apprentices.

He also hears that Apparently the Local Wizard of every region is supposed to do a 5-yearly sweep of the surrounding towns to check for kids that have magic potential and then send them to Magic School/take them in as their apprentice directly.

And Garak. Did not do that.

He was Lazy and Angery. Exile will do that to you.

Julian isn’t too happy when he learns about this and he walks out of the banquet hall into the garden- to where Garak follows him.

"So just because you were all bitchy about having to follow this country's rules about magic you let me grow up not knowing my full potential? How many of my childhood friends might be able to do magic if they tried?"

“I was in a really bad place back then."

"SO WHAT? Things are okay now because you found me? If you had been two minutes early during that attack you wouldnt even know I could use magic!"

"...but I *wasn’t* early!"

So Julian just throws up his hands in frustration and leaves to get away from Garak for a while.

The next day he mingles more with the other apprentices and they exchange Ideas and Skills and also Gossip about their teachers.

Some of the apprentices suggest that Julian could go to magic school for a while before applying for a *new* teacher, since obviously Garak did him wrong.

This doesn’t sound like a bad idea, so he talks with some older mages and most of them are friendly and are like “Oh yeah, sure, we’d love to take you in.”

But then it turns out a lot of people are talking behind his back about how much of an outlier he is.

(wizard culture is like 50% magic and 50% gossip)

So Julian is standing on a balcony and down below he hears a group of Douche Wizards discussing his inadequacies.

And it kinda makes Julian feel like absolute shit, so his powers go wobbly again. But then enter stage right: Garak

Who properly puts those wizards into their rightful place like "Say one more bad thing about my apprentice and I’ll blast your punk ass back to Romulus. You should KNOW the reason why I dont usually take apprentices, but here you are anyway saying he has no power. He has more power in his pinky than all of you combined."

Turns out there’s an extra layer to Why Garak didn’t do the "Check for Magicians in your Area" thing- it’s because he openly has no interest in training or working with anyone who isnt Special or Powerful.

Which means Julians happens to be. very special. and very powerful.

And hearing that from Garak makes him go 😳

His emotions are running high and he starts *floating*. Probably the worst thing to do on a first floor balcony out of All The Things To Do On A First Floor Balcony.

So he’s Floating and he doesnt know how to make that Stop.

He panics, starts falling and basically crashes right into Garaks arms.

"Oh great, youre right on time. We're leaving."

"What? But the banquet lasts for a week?" also I'm still a little mad but also a little in love with you?

But Garak has already teleported them back to the tower before he can really argue.

Anyway Julian is upset about many things overall, but mostly that he didnt get to dance. He practiced a lot in his off time.

Thank God Garak Knows This

"...I know how to make magic music. Let’s have a little fun at least."

They dance and Julian starts floating *again*.

Garak 👀’s @ Julian floating "Okay I’ve been recording most of your emotion based powers. This is new."

Julian just Floats Higher out of embarrassment, so garak is like ‘well I'll just join him up there.’

So he does and Julian is like “WHY CAN YOU DO THAT. SHOW ME HOW TO DO THAT. HOW CAN I CONTROL THIS."

Turns out his emotions are too unclear, which makes his magic unbalanced, so really all they have to do is get him some Clarity.

Garak is like "Well one very easy way to do that is-" and then they kiss in the air. Floating. because I’m gay and I will use gay magic tropes as I see fit.

so that’s the garashir side of things, on to kiradax

There's Some Slow Burn In There

Basically Kira is a mage, but instead of using magic to fight she just Enchants Swords/Arrows/Other Weapons.

Because she fought in a wizard war and when there's not a lot of mana potions to go around you have to get creative.

She didn’t get a proper magician name because she was actually never anyone’s apprentice, but people still call her The Blade because she is just so cool.

Anyway in this universe mages age very slowly, and Kira is probably around 60 years old when she meets Jadzia. Which is not a lot in wizard years.

She does feels a little inadequate about being so Young and Inexperienced she didn’t really expect nor wanted to run into the legendary Jadzia Dax who everyone thinks is like 300 years old, maybe more.

So meeting someone who is her complete opposite just makes her go "Hmph. I dont wanna associate with you."

But Jadzia keeps popping in randomly around her almost every day until Kira snaps like "WHAT is your problem???"

“I never learned how to enchant tools."

"What."

"Can you teach me?"

"The great Dax has never enchanted a single tool or weapon?"

"I took care of everything with other types of magic. Will you teach me?"

So Kira Nerys, The Blade, the person everyone looked down on because she uses enchanted tools instead of magic for everything- is being asked by this legendary mage to teach her something. What an honor. What an incredible thing.

But She Says No

So Jadzia keeps bothering her every day.

But eventually bothering her turned into "Hey wanna get some coffee? Wanna go to the library with me? Can I look at you while youre in the smithy? Do you wanna look at me while I come up with new magic formulas? Wanna get drunk together and maybe kiss but definitely have no recollection of it in the morning?"

- over a span of 10 years.

But at the end of those 10 years Jadzia still hasnt learned how to enchant tools.

And it takes One day at the magic banquet for Nerys to actually realise the Implications of that.

It’s the third banquet they've been to- together, as each other’s plus one.

They color coordinate their robes and wear matching accessoires. The works.

And Kira decides that now is the day to grill her Totally-Not-Girlfriend about the reason why she sticks around.

"You could have just gotten someone else to teach you how to enchant things."

"Why would I need anyone to teach me, I have you to enchant things *for me*."

"No but before I started doing it for you. Like the whole first five years of knowing me."

"Oh well I didn’t want anyone else because I was very much infatuated with you."

And Kira just bluescreens. Error 404 nerys.exe not found.

Until she catches herself.

"You...*were* infatuated with me?"

"Yes? You obviously never saw me that way though. So I stuck around for the good company and the coffee."

Now you see over the course of 10 years Kira’s irritation about Jadzia slowly turned into Something Else. But she thought Jadzia only saw her as a friend.

On the other hand Jadzia definitely had feelings from the start, but because kira was in Denial she didnt act on those feelings.

If I were a shitty writer or- god foirbid- *Straight*, I would have there be a miscommunication right about now and prolong their useless lesbian suffering.

But I’m not.

Basically Kira just goes

"Okay but when you say *were* attracted to me does that mean you *stopped*?"

"Uh. No?"

"Cool. Excuse me, I need a moment."

So she tries to hide from this sudden revelation and her feelings in a hedge maze, but there’s no use hiding from Jadzia.

Who, instead of just walking around the labyrinth to find her like a normal person, basically whacks down the bushes in a straight line until she reaches Kira.

"THERE YOU ARE! I used this completely unenchanted sword to get to you and tell you I definitely still like you. Now will you PLEASE teach me how to enchant tools as your first courting gift?"

And Kira is like "God yes you dumbass-" and they kiss.

now wizard quodo is funny because I kind of started this part as a joke but then it all got Serious

First of all Quark is Actually A Really Powerful Magician.

But what does he do with his great power?

Move from his home country to the city of wizards and open a bar.

Because he is still fundamentally *Quark*.

And Odo is still fundamentally Odo, because he is a Shapeshifting Alien From Actual Outer Space You Know.

He still went through the whole "I was studied by scientists (wizards) and couldnt let them know I was sentient for a long time which made me very grouchy and lonely" thing.

So Odo spends like ~100 years going from captivity/being an object of scientific study to living as a guard in the city of wizards.

Basically everyone thinks that Odo cant use magic- including Odo- because, well, he’s a bunch of slime that came from a meteor.

Then he meets Quark, powerful wizard and bartender.

And he has *no* idea who he is.

Only that he’s the guy who runs that one shady gambling bar and is involved in some illegal business.

And Quark is like "Ah finally. A worthy opponent."

So he and Quark have the same vibe as on DS9- where Quark keeps doing illegal stuff and Odo tries to stop him and the universe decides to say enemies to lovers 400k words slowburn.

And one day Quark gets into some Seriously shady business with some people who are now very aggressively demanding Quark give them their money back

and they're. you know. threatening violence.

Odo shows up and right before this one dude is about to straight up sucker punch Quark he's like "HALT!" and Wow He Made A Magic Happen.

Now. Because Quark is Indebted to Odo. He is expected to take him on as his magic apprentice.

At first he is Not Down For That. They both aren’t. So even though technically they are teacher and apprentice they both just refuse to work together.

Until Odo goes to check up on Quark one day- because as we all know he makes it a point to drop by his bar four times a day just to let him know he's thinking about him- and Quark is in trouble again.

Only this time Odo is like "I'm not gonna help him. I dont even know how I *could* help him. Since he hasn’t taught me any magic, the bastard."

So he wants to just pass by and leave when Quark basically starts to just Demolish these people with magic in a frightening and totally not impressive display.

MIND YOU Quark is still generally incompetent. If this was D&D he'd have like, very low skill points but unlimited spell slots.

Anyway Odo goes 👀

Because him being unable to use magic in a country/city where everyone he *knows* can use magic has always made him feel bad.

So he goes to Quark like "Okay. I changed my mind. Please teach me magic."

And Quark tries to teach Odo magic, earnestly.

And Odo tries to learn magic from Quark, for real.

But the key word here is *try*.

Because neither is very good at what theyre *trying* to do.

Odo didn’t Really want to learn from Quark and that's pretty much the reason why Quark doesnt Really want to teach Odo. But They Try.

There’s a lot of fights and arguments and "You’re not doing it right" vs "You’re not explaining it right"

But hey, at least Odo can now do some magic, which makes his guard job a lot easier.

He also gets to socialise more with other wizards and their apprentices, and he becomes a generally happier pile of humanoid goo!

Meanwhile Quark slowly but surely turns into a more Respected wizard. And his bar also becomes a bit more respectable as well.

it's almost like,,they both wanna be,,,,their best selves,,

and learning to work together has Somehow set them on the right path,,,

idk man sounds kinda gay,,,,

But then the banquet rolls around.

Quark is like "Oh fuck I Have to take Odo to this social function because hes my apprentice and thems are the rules."

and Odo is like "Oh fuck I Have to attend this social function with Quark because thems the rules."

The vibe they’re both getting is- "It's all fun and games when we're by ourselves but Somehow acting friendly in public feels Wrong."

So they agree to Arrive together and then split up and spend as little time as possible together lest they fall victim to some kind of *feeling*.

And like all plans that Odo and Quark make it works out brilliantly for Exactly 5 Minutes.

Because while Quark is talking to his accomplished and very boring wizard acquaintances he kinda realises "God I wish Odo were here-"

And as Odo is talking to all these annoying ass apprentices he kinda realises "God I wish Quark was here-"

So that's what they do on the first day of the banquet. and the second. and the third.

They just keep only seeing each other from the corner of their eyes but dont really get to talk/argue about anything and it's making them feel Not So Good, Actually

Now the fourth day is the kicker.

Because while Odo is talking to some people he gets tapped on the shoulder and there he is! The worst father on this side of the galaxy! Doctor Mora- but like, as a wizard scientist.

"Oh my god Odo? You’re here? How did you manage that? You can’t use magic dont be silly! *I* studied you and who would know you better than me? What? *you* know yourself better? Nonsense, now walk with me- how have you been :)?"

Obviously Odo is getting Very distressed but he can't exactly say No, so he walks around with Mora.

They sit down near a fountain and his ‘father’ just starts grilling Odo about what he's been up to.

And eventually they start talking about Quark

"Wait, *Quark*? The absolute magic failure who runs that disgusting establishment? That Quark?"

"Well I wouldnt put it like that, he’s not-"

But Mora goes on- "Oh no my dear boy that won't do! You have to learn from a *good* wizard. Like me! Dont you want that? Oh I'm sure you want that. That nasty good for nothing will resign as your teacher first thing tomorrow!"

And Odo is like "Now wait a minute, Quark might have his flaws, but-"

"There! See, you admitted it. He's flawed. He can't possibly be a good teacher for you. But I would be! I *raised* you."

But Odo is getting Rather Angy right about now.

"Well you did a pretty bad job raising me considering you didnt even know I could do magic until now."

"I can’t believe it. Quark is such a bad influence on you. You never used to talk back at me. This is what happens when you hang around with people who dont know you like I do."

Then something in him snaps and Odo just goes Off on Mora.

"MAYBE *YOU* DONT KNOW *HIM* LIKE I DO!"

And he basically breaks the fountain theyre sitting at with some accidental emotional magic.

So after Mora goes "...I better get someone to fix that-" and runs off, Odo is standing in front of this broken fountain and thinks about how this might be a cruel metaphor for his life. And then the worst possible thing happens.

He Spots Quark Badly Hidden Behind A Pillar

Internally he just goes 'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA'

Externally though it’s more like "How much of that did you hear???"

Quark’s trying to lighten the mood with a "Haha well it's hard to avoid hearing things with lobes as big as mine!"

But Odo is not playing, so he breaks the fountain some more. As intimidation.

So Quark goes "Okay. Alright. I heard all the parts where you defended my honor. Now move aside."

And Odo goes 'AAAAAAAAAAAAAA' inside again, so he doesnt really move but just gets nudged aside by Quark.

Who returns the fountain back to its previous state.

Things are nice and silent for a second but then Quark disturbs the moment by saying "Okay now, real talk- you want another teacher, is that right?"

So Odos head whips up and he goes "No??? What the fuck quark. I thought you listened to that conversation. Youre the only one I want-"

and he Immediately slaps a hand over his mouth because Oh God That Came Out Wrong-

But Quark is just Laughing and being his usual little shit self like "Haha good one, let's go back inside now. (where the social conventions will force us to remain apart so we dont have to confront what you just said.)"

on the inside though- Quark is just as 'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA' as Odo

"I absolutely Cannot go inside and socialise right now, I’ve had Quite enough of that."

"Oh...well then...i'll leave you be?"

"No don’t-"

So Odo quickly grabs Quark’s hand (and Quark just fuckin uh dies on the spot) but he's not very communicative at the moment. So Quark kinda has to just interpret that for himself.

"Aaaaalright- let’s just take a walk then."

So they walk through the rose garden. holding *hands*. and Quark points out nice or interesting things while Odo just nods or hums in agreement.

Until they’ve come full circle and end up back at the fountain, where Quark is like "Okay. Wanna go back inside *now*?"

Because he swears if they spend one more second like this he will HAVE to kiss this pile of space goo and he’d rather Odo make that decision for him.

And Odo is like "I just want to stay with you."

So Quark is like ‘Cool Cool Cool Cool Cool Cool Cool’, pulls them behind a hedge and kisses Odo.

because on GOD I enjoy the “going from an argument straight into kissing” trope, but that one is actually too on brand for quodo so I HAD to change it up.

#ds9 #garashir #kiradax #quodo #deep space nine #hahahahahahaahahow did i get this to four thousand words #wizard lizard #yea thats what im calling it

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scummy-writes · 3 years

Note

This is not a request but a more share your opinion with me kinda thing...

So Theo

I understand that he’s a sweet a caring man under his grumpy shell and yada yada ... and there is nothing wrong in liking him I’d even say that I’m jealous because he’s like really hot

But man I can’t get in to him I can like him! every time he ether calls the mc jodje or puppy or dog I would cringe so bad

Like my fight or fly instincts will go overdrive Like??? How dare you?? I’m so sorry but I don’t understand how you can overelook his blatant mean things he says and say oh yea I’ll definitely fuck him!

He has no respect for the mc and treats them with little to no regard in the begging but only when he starts to catch feelings he becomes nicer?? meaner !?!! My brain just thinks that he belongs to the nice guys spectrum? Idk

Maybe because I’m not a masochist or I don’t have a name calling kink or that I despise tsuderes not like it’s anything wrong with that you go girl

Fuck I sound like such a dick in this I’m so sorry

But I needed to get it out of my chest

So thougts on Theo?

Is it that you're wondering why I like him, or why people in general like him? I'll touch into both, regardless, BUT. There will be spoilers for his route and some povs. So there's a heads up.

To preface: I don't mind if folks dont like the characters I like or just don't like certain characters in general, so I hope you know (and anyone else) I don't judge people over that, only how they treat others in regards to their preferences.

I'm with you on the name thing, honestly. I cringed a lot and still do at times. While it feels as though its a shared, lighthearted type pet name (haha) later on in the relationship, at the beginning it just sounds dismissive and belittling.

But I think it's supposed to be? Theo has a god awful issue at refusing to believe his worth with anything. For his pov at mcs arrival to the mansion, he's actually the one that spots her first, but Napoleon gets to her first and Theo's first thoughts are along the lines of "I'm not the star of this show, I need to take my exit" since Napoleon looks like a hero and has a better handle on the situation.

In his route he shows this a lot, and it shines the most with Vincent. Theo wanted to be an artist too when he was younger, but gave up once he saw how talented Vincent was, fully believing he couldnt be an artist because 'God didn't grant [Theo] that talent.'

And all of that ramps up to 100 when it comes to the reasons he agreed to being a vampire- the revenge. Not only does he blame himself for what happened to Vincent (for introducing Gaugin[sp?] to him, to encouraging their friendship and etc), but now that he's a vampire he doesn't believe he deserves anything good to happen to him. Good things like coming to peace with what happened, or a love life.

So the hondje thing, how I feel about it is that at first its meant to be belittling because he doesn't want you to like him. All the intimidation is part of that, and even then I feel like you can still see hints of that softness still peeking through in the beginning due to him refusing to let the residents/Comte telling mc theyre vampires, because he knows right off the bat it'll possibly terrify her and lead her to doing something rash (like how mc nearly runs out of the mansion the moment she finds out about it). Can see it in how when she's really upset, he immediately puts down that gruffness to make sure she's okay, how he carefully pushes her into standing her own ground (though it really doesnt seem like she needs it, but alas its an otome classic cliche) and gently pushes her into going further into what she enjoys (getting into art like him and excitedly learning about it).

That gruffness turns into Theo being Stern/Firm, but not unforgiving. It turns into being a jerk when shes about to get hurt or get into something she shouldn't (in his eyes- the academy folks, getting hurt by falling for him, getting hurt during his push for revenge). I think he does hold respect for her due to how he pushes for her to tell him in her own words how she feels about the art they're looking at, and how he pushes for her to choose the pieces theyre going to showcase and etc, because he values and respect her opinion. (If he didn't, I don't think he'd keep letting her help him out or even speak much in regards to the art.) I'm sure there's other examples of him respecting her, but that's the first that comes to mind.

It probably feels like hes an asshole and hard to love because in Theo's route you're not the main objective in his eyes. He's focused on revenge, and admittedly, you're in the way for a part of it. He’s now trying to make sure you get home safely without landing you in his problems, and if that means being gruff and a bit of a dick, so be it.

Or, that's how I see it anyway. I think you have to look at these things about him and understand that him 'suddenly' being a nicer guy isn't actually that sudden, it's been there all along and he's been putting on a front. Because the idea of falling for someone when he's had it in his head for years that he doesn't deserve happiness? Scary. Basically that whole 'Better to deal with the devil that you know instead of the devil that you don't know' thing.

And hey, if you look at that stuff and go "okay, I get it, but I still don't like him" you know that's okay, right? There's characters in a lot of games/media I don't vibe with when they haven't 'done anything wrong'. It's fine to not like a character, even if a lot of other people seem to.

Admittedly, your wording is kinda hard for me to understand if you're kinda. Mad at me for liking Theo? But I'm taking it as confusion at people liking a character you can't see any good in and trying to get opinions from someone on how they could enjoy him. Because of that I don't think you're being a dick, but if you were to send this message to others to get their opinion on why they like Theo, I'd try to word it a little more gentle.

Anyway, for folks who are not anon: if I got small details wrong please don't go off on me, I haven't played his route in a while and forget things even in my top favorite routes. Also, please don't start fussing at anon because admittedly I don't want my notifications clogged with arguments.

#anonymous #replies #hope that makes sense

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oh-theatre · 4 years

Text

Livin’ It Up: Chapter 3

Chapter title: Its All Coming Back To Me Now

A/N: New, bad, sorry. Comment? Sorry for short, important.

words: 1340

summary: return

pairings: Eventual logicality, eventual prinxiety, eventual demus, eventual Moceit (Which then goes back to Logicality and Demus)

warnings: Swearing, alcohol, underage drinking, drinking, parties, kissing, throw up, slight self harm, emotional abuse

Ao3 Link

“Ugh of course he did” Virgil sighs, throwing his journal across the room. Patton giggles still scribbling away at his homework. Virgil sits up, rubbing the nape of his neck with sympathy in his eyes. “Im sorry Pat, i know you wanted...not that”

“Hey its ok! I gave it a shot, plus the night I had was fun” Patton admits, he shrugs away his thoughts but finds himself doodling in the corner of his calculus work. “This is pointless” He shut his book away, returning it neatly to its spot on his desk. “My brain cant focus” He threw his eraser towards Virgil “Tell me about Roman” He smirks.

“Ok look nothings happened since the party” Virgil tells, and Patton listens, well until Virgil begins to ramble about their theatre project. His mind was in too many places at once, and he loved Virgil but once his gushing ended and his worries set in, Patton couldn't focus. His mind wandered to that fateful night, under the amber lights of a bustling evening.

“But they're so sticky” Logan scrunched his face, watching Patton thank the shop tender for his caramel apple. Patton rolls his eyes with a playful smile.

“Delicious is the word you're looking for” He corrects, Logan still doubtful. “Come on, take a bite” he offers, holding it up. Hesitant at first, Logan eyes it, was he examining the apple? Oh god, the way his glasses sat on his nose practically falling, Patton swears he could hear his heartbeat.

“Alright” He says, he holds his glasses, Patton strengthens his hold as Logan takes a bite out of the delectable treat. Logan's eyes quickly fly open, a surprise as he chews.

“Congrats Moreno! You're one of us common folk now” Patton teases, the wind ruffling both of their hair. Logan nods, taking yet another bite, Patotn didn't mind, he found the small chipmunk like chewing adorable. “Come on Simon, there's more to show you” He jokes, Logan takes his hand allowing the cheerleader to guide him. The apple was gone quickly but neither minded, it made their commute easier.

Patton had to wonder if Logan had ever been outside however, every little new thing sparked him, the bored robotic look in his eyes disappeared with a new flicker of excitement. Patton adored it. He grew fond of how Logan would fiddle with his fingers, it was soft.

“Just ignore them” Logan whispered as the pair walked towards a more quiet spot.

“Hm?” Patton hummed in response, a small skip as the gravel crackled below their feet.

“The girls and guys staring, just ignore them” And Patton had been. It was hard not to notice, each with daggers in their eyes but even if tonight was just a one time thing, or whatnot Patton was here to enjoy himself, enjoy the carnival he had spent weeks preparing and try something new. And it was nice, even if he did notice the winks Logan would throw out, the boredom as Patton chatted with people and the constant phone checking.

Its nice

It was nice

“So now im like i don't know! Should I dye my hair!” Virgil finishes, Patton coughs away his thoughts.

“I might have adhd but you can really go down a rabbit hole” Patton laughs, Virgil chuckles a flash of red on his cheeks. “Not a bad thing, and i think you should dye your hair if you want. No matter what you're gonna look great” Patton compliments. “Crap! We’re gonna be late” He checks his watch, morning homework sessions on monday were a usual. Except when they forget to actually get to school.

“Id say race you there but i dont wanna get there any faster than I have to” Virgil says, and with that they rush out the house.

~~~

“Does he have to looking so fucking cute” Logan spits, Roman stops his words instaly and looks to where an angry Logan glares.

“Uh Im sorry, imma need my friend back” Roman pokes, Logan turns to him, his eyebrows tightened. “Dude, what is going on with you” Roman questions, Logan slams the locker shut trying to distract himself from Patton and Virgil standing just a few steps down the hall at their own lockers. “Just a reminder that you-”

“Roman I am fully aware of what happened, I am also fully aware that the only reason Patton has not spoken to me is my own fault” Logan leans against the locker paralleling Romans pose. “However I am still infuriated that he looks that cute” Logan sighs. He wasn't wrong, even if Roman and Patton had their...issues he still knew his former friend. And Patton had an incredible eye for fashion.

And today was no exception. He wore a dropped shoulder cropped pullover, striped with white, pastel blue and pink, finished with a white collar. His light blue jeans sat comfortably on his legs cuffed at the bottom to show off his white sneakers. His belt was prominent and no mistake and his backpack slung over just one shoulder as he unpacked his belongings into his locker.

Objectively he was cute, but Roman was distracted by Virgil. He stood next to Patton talking away, his outfits always suited him and his defensive look only made Romans face flush more.

“Welp, you win some you lose some” Roman shrugs, patting his friend.

“I so appreciate the sentiment dear friend” Logan's sarcasm was not lost on Roman.

“Come on, you need some sushi in you” Roman takes his friend's shoulders, preparing to guide his friend towards the exit. Each has a free period that bleeds into lunch so why not take advantage?

~~~

“Is it bad that I want to wear Romans varsity jacket?” Virgil whispered as he darted his eyes away from the said jock who only stood a few feet away.

“No, it's adorable” Patton says, he organizes his things in his locker, ignoring as Logan and Roman begin to walk towards them. He knew rationally they were headed towards the exit but the small inkling of fear if they were to come up to him was still present. But quickly his mind was taken elsewhere with an abrupt cheer.

“One! Two! Three!” He hears, why was that voice so familiar? “Who missed me!”

“Janus!” Patton recognizes, he spins with unfiltered excitement rushing through the hall. Janus laughs as he sees his friend racing towards him wasting no time to wrap him in his arms and spin him quickly. Their embrace was pure elation, Virgil caught up to the pair with his own grin. They finally parted ignoring the crowd around them, specifically two boys who had decided sushi could wait.

“Buttercup!” He grins, Patton giggles delighted. He had missed Janus so much, and the sweet way the nickname fell only increased the buzz in his heart.

Someone else in the hall was not feeling the ecstatic energy. Logan glared his shoulders tightening under Romans hold. What was this envious sweat dripping from him as he watched Janus snake a respectful arm around Patton's waist, cupped to keep his gentlemans distance.

But Logan wasn't allowed to be mad

He saw Carly down the hall, she winked at him receiving a disgruntled scowl in return. He watched Brittany and Martin walk by him, each a flustered look.

And why should he care, he had the whole school, why did he need-

His thoughts were interrupted by the most intoxicating, sweetest sound to ever bless his ears. Pattons little giggle as he clutched to Janus for stability. He may have been seventeen but he towered over the boys, including Logan. Virgil seemed happy enough but Logan couldn't get over Patton. Patton stood blushing, his hand never left Janus’s side and he was...flashing the brightest smile.

Why did Logan want to be the one to cause that reaction

“Oh shut up moreno” He whispers to himself, swiping away from Romans grasps he shoots Martin a wink before making his way to lunch, a hesitant Roman followed.

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la5t-res0rt · 4 years

Note

fun fact fucko no one cares that he’s trans, gnc, or autistic. all they care about is that he said someone wasn’t bisexual all because they hate them. thats fucked up no matter who you are. being austistic isn’t an excuse to be an utter dick hole.

alrighty folks strap in because we are in for a long one today

to start off i will begin by saying that i care about the identities of people i like and call friends i care enough to listen and learn from them because they have different perspectives on issues that i as a person who is none of the things that this person is will ever understand

it is important to listen to people and learn from them not just shine a light out of your ass for someone out of a weird place of blind worship thats honestly so cringey but that isnt what this is about this about you and likely others harassing ad sending death threats my friend and comrade betel bitches

i will now be going under a readmore to spare the dashboard

so lets recap what exactly is he being harassed for

as you all are no doubt aware there is a blog called nether receipts where a certain user we shall not name catalogs instances where members of the beetlejuice fandom are harassed correction its a blog where this person catalogs instances where flaws in their character as well as the characters of the people around her are highlighted and critiqued with the occaisional off color remark and threat which i obviously do not approve of who would

anyway following reading some ill-informed and not-so-well-phrased comments from a certain narcissistic user about their sexuality my friend had this to say

this was the post that got them put on this receipts blog which really exists as a source of people for a certain cluster of the beetlebabe fandom to harass and try to drag or cancel

this is the post that has made people call him biphobic and here is why thats wrong and stupid

you said in your ask that he only is saying that this icky person is not bisexual because there is malice between them and while yes its true that there is malice orion never once said that this person wasnt bisexual

i took the liberty of sifting through the harassment asks he received yesterday because you all love receipts so much i took the liberty of grabbing a few and adding some highlights so you dont miss the important bits

orion never once said this person isnt bisexual he stated that equating doing femme on femme pornography to bisexuality is a biphobic statement and is in fact a problematic thing to say

there may be crossover between bisexual people and people who do femme on femme but they are far from the same thing doing pornography is a choice you actively make and you do it for compensation however being bisexual is simply part of who you are it is something you dont choose

although this person would perhaps disagree

and before you come for me this person posted these for the world to see and obviously i have as many receipts as my drive can carry furthermore how does this argument make sense why would you care so much about heterophobia if youre not heterosexual why are you so pressed oh wait is it perhaps

because this person is using the split attraction model for woke points like this screams that this person sees women as sex objects or perhaps this person is comphet and is denying themselves because heteronormativity is so deeply ingrained in their being that they wish to cling to heterosexuality to keep up their squeaky clean white feminist woman persona or maybe theyre just not well informed on lgbt+ issues

editors note the editor is an ace person who considers using the split attraction model is situations like this isnt exactly helpful like i cant stop you from doing it but you shouldnt have to say im a bisexual heteromantic person you can just be a bisexual woman and keep dating men you dating men doesnt erase your bisexuality saying that you would have sex with a woman but not romantically be involved with them makes the editor think woman = sex object and as a feminist the editor has to say thats fucked up

i will reiterate implying that doing pronography of any kind is equitable to a human sexualty is harmful to bisexual people and if youre like uhhh im bi and i think its okay guess what you do not speak for every single bi person so you should try harder to be compassionate for other peoples level of comfort

in any case statements like these are hurtful to bi people equating voluntary sex work to a sexuality isnt okay and its something that person should maybe address and consider apologizing for but since this person only listens to people in their inner circle and they dont even really listen to them its unlikely that this person will ever make amends for past biphobic tendencies because as everyone has been so quick to point out being bi doesnt excuse biphobia or homophobia or anything of the sort editors note heterophobia is not a legitimate issue im sorry if you feel oppressed for your straightness but really thats a you issue

here is one more screenshot where my friend basically covers what i have just said as well as reminding the world that the owner of nether receipts is a narcissist

being a bisexual person does not excuse you from saying biphobic things and there is literally no identifier you can use for yourself that exempts you from criticism for your actions and it doesnt mean that people cant demand that you address the wrongs youve done or said

you dont have to listen you dont have to do anything but dont be surprised if you say something shitty to a group of people and they get mad at you

also all that being said what orion said was not biphobic if anything he is raephobic but lets be honest who isnt ok there thats my one funny haha for you

we have every right to criticize someone who creates simulated cp and shares it with minors in 18+ servers or someone who equated bisexuality to voluntary sex work or someone who accuses people who disagree with them of being fascists or nazis or someone who goes out of their way to repost and edit art in a mocking manner or someone who actively claims to own a fandom like these are all critique worthy behaviors that all come from the same person who never explains their actions never holds themselves accountable for the shit they cause like we as people who share the same space as this person have every write to call bull roar when we see it

it is no secret that i dislike his person and it is also no secret that i will not hesitate to the the opportunity to drag them for being a shitty person whenever the opportunity arises and since their most recent beef with me was about how i was a bad friend i guess i figured this would be a good time to come forward for one of my friends who received dozens of harassment messages and several death threats over his commentary on the actions of this one vile individual

and i am addressing them now if they ever end up reading this or when it is inevitably sent to this person

if youve got a problem with the way he and i or other antis critique you maybe come out from behind your wall of dipshit cronies and talk to us your damn self i am very sick of having to deal with nasti or morgan or that one minor or suz or that person that runs the rp blog or any of the others in your little hoard im tired of them trying to be slick like we see you we see all of you

all of your simulated cp aside youve said some really shitty things that you could easily amend since youve likely learned more about what it means to be lgbt+ since it is now a community you see yourself being a part of

part of being human is learning from your past and making a better version of yourself for tomorrow and although i think you are a really awful person i dont think youre above self betterment and self reflection and self awareness

also you dont seem to care at all when threats are being tossed around by your buddies but no matter how much me or orion or any of the others dislike what you do no person in their right mind would be okay with sending death threats and you shouldnt either you should at the very least extend that courtesy

anyway

fuck you asker youre full of trash garbage and i hope you have a not so good day like i hope it rains or something invalidate my friends identity and ill yell at clouds

#discourse #harassment #sexuality discourse

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heat0death0of0the0universe · 4 years

Text

i gotta talk about Narrative Telephone

I. Fucking. Love. It.

when my extreme dislike of second-hand embarrassment takes a loud backseat i can fin so much that i love about it.

but what i love most isn't the humor. or even the continued critical role content. no, i love the allegory and the metaphor of the whole concept.

all my life i loved the concept of watching time move forward. seeing evolution, hearing language change, watching cultures rise and fall. but what i dont like is time and the fact that im along for the ride. id rather watch evolution, not be step 48801 of a process with no end. and sadly most media and general public doesn't like watching time change. no one wants too see how the English language evolves with a rise in Spanish speaking folks and pop culture creating new idioms and words. everyone would much rather watch something with the same animals with the same people walking the same cities speaking the same language, albeit maybe with a few more neon lights and holograms to make you feel like its in some vague ~future~. but narrative telephone gives me the change i like to see. i can finally feel like im watching a story going through the times and changes of a culture.

im gonna need to explain a little more. what better way than to show off all the current episodes.

episode one is simple, pumat and the big bad wolf. the sorry starts with pumat on a stroll through the woods. he finds a talking wolf and they fight. the story ends with the pumat eating a nice mushroom and wolf stew. but the changes to the story are what get to me. i love ashley, trust me i really do. but in this context, she’s basically the dark ages. everything crumbles and the story follows in the crash. this point is when the more brothers grimm tales and nonsense folklore are added in. people dont like the night, so the seen changes to match. suddenly the wolf not only speaks, but has a beak! the fighting through being somewhat vague in the original story now is lost to time and is none existent. taliesin builds off it, changing it ever so slightly from a garbled to a more of a warning story. a story that reflects a change in a cultures thoughts on the woods. when everything was all writings and giant building the woods where just a place to rule over and harvest, but after the fall now its returned to the unexplored. the place of fey and monsters that should never be explored at night. marisha adds winter and gives it just the smallest bit of added context. a man in the woods during night before might have been seen as mad or crazy, but a man scrounging for some mushrooms in a dead forest in winter isnt tempting fate, he’s struggling to live. a shift in view also makes it so that the beaked magic wolf is just as weakened by the winter, and is easily turned away by just a voice. sam is..something. if ashley is the dark ages than id say sam is like a renaissance. specifically a very drunk renaissance. the kingdom was risen and is filled with hubris and pride.its gained a very “man falls for his hubris” greek vibe to it. pumat has gone from scavenging to walking unbothered by cold dead winter. the kingdom has lost its enjoyment of strange creatures, monsters are still around in legend, but most have been replaced with magical people, with a clear rise in “person in an animals skin” tropes. the original fight has been mostly lost, now the story is that of a magic hunter who eyes the mushrooms taken by pumat and gives a chuckle and permission to continue exploring the woods unimpeded. pumat eats just the mushrooms, which now have gained the lupine taste, and the vague description of “he became something more” giving the idea of some sort of curse for his nature. Laura has added back the wolfs anger, but removed the suspicion of pumat. the curse is still in the end of the story though. this could be a change into more of a forbidden fruit trope. because pumat still trusted strange mushrooms in a dead forest with a magic guardian, he paid the price. travis is a sort of close to modernization of the story. its the point in time when its nonsensical nature and magic was viewed as weird and convoluted. similar to when we look at older myths with long intricate plans and think “nice story, but poor pacing”. liam goes for the “granddad telling stories by the fire” vibe. the tale has died down and is being co-opted for new use. now the rather dark tale has turned into more of a children's storybook with messages like not to trust strangers and to not do drugs being tagged on.

ep. 2: jesters ability to say 1000 words a second. pickadors plume is a story in a story. a story about gaining a treasure through a complex and detailed series of events with lots of loaded lore about the world with no clear description of what the treasure truly is. liam is the first few generations. the generation close enough to the original to try and remember, but not enough to keep every detail. the best example is of the ending, where the treasure should be. humans love rewards, so a story with a vague reward isnt enough for people. in liams generation transition to the griffon, travel, and fruit specifically being the treasure begins to lay its foundations. since this is already so long i will also mention that the transition from stone shaped like a heart ---to----> stone shaped like a hut could be an example of a changing dialect and language. sam, travis, and marisha are clear evidence of a shift in culture. jesters complete backstory wasnt introduced till now. and in it comes the cultures want to explain this event. humans love simplifying, but we also love to describe things. if we want to, we will add words just as much as we remove them. the dialect changes just as much. the new word of “schtupping." has either replaced or become a synonym of the word fucking, the name of the plum as even changed too. the treasure has gone from “lost to time” to “there is treasure, i just wont name it”. but fret not, for the mystery aspect is still in the story. for now everything will disappear like it never happened, or did it? though travis specifically specifies that you keep the treasure. humans love rewards, it was gonna come back eventually. matt is the sorta an enlightening moment in the society. at the very least its the point in time where people who know geography and history say “wait, that layout doesnt make any sense”. taelisan and ashley are the beginning of the end. the slow fall into the dark ages. the story becomes vague and small. slowly becoming more of a statement and less of a story. the society is forgetting large chunks and its bleeding out into other legends. there maybe a sort of thanksgiving/ christmas sort of event spawned from or because of the myth, but the story itself isnt going to live every far (hence why its ending in a dark age and not somewhen else)

Ep. 3: boy do humans enjoy rich’s, love, and drama. sam’s story comes from a society that warns against wanting what you wish for without expecting some strings attached and features a evil ruler to boot, just so they can date the legend. the story of a delivery boy who invents a pair of glasses to see through objects and uses them to win rewards and gives them all to a rich woman that only loves him for the money, and really loves the prince. matt changes the story so the two are already in love. but also changed it so that it was the greed of the prince and the wife that lead to the heartbreak rather than the delivery boys naivety. travis changes delivery boy from a clever inventor to just already owning the glasses. both matt and travis with there respective fictional cultures are showing how humans like to remember the stuff they liked in a story, so when they forget when something specifically came in, they just fill in the blank and assume its always been there. travis specificaly begins the stories slow march to a less heartbreaking story by adding a joke to help give the couple a more flushed out relationship. this is also the shift in cultural perspective. the antagonist began his life as a evil prince, but now is simply a rotten neighbor. this could mean the myth was co-opted to fit a better role, possibly after the removal of monarchy or just of a specific bloodline.the rich wife becomes just the wife, no money involved. this is also the beginning of what a full fledged re-write of the story. now the delivery man has gone from giving up to still being in love with the wife and now even standing up for himself. (possibly a mix of when the story was of a prince and used to promote the common folk to rise up against the kings, leading to the theory of a removal of the crown). ashely...oh ashely. this moment in history atleast solidifies the love between them, and even brings back delivery husbands inventor skills. liam is the slow clawing climb back up out of the collapse. he’s still very much in the collapse of the kingdom. but aleast its just before when begin to solidify into the new meta of the era. laura and taelisin’s era is a complete re-write after the collapse of the society. the focus has moved to more of a folk-hero style legend about rising above through theft and cheating (could mean that after the collapse the culture around theft changed from crime to fighting to survive. the antagonist has really changed from being the bad guy to just in the love triangle. the society seems to agree with every polyamourous person when we all say “this how drama triangle could have been avoided if you guys all just got together”. marisha’s only real change a more modernization from “specticals” to “goggles” and that the culture either wants to make half-orcs feel more inclusive or just really dont like goliaths and changed it.

ep. 4: deargodfinallyigottheneedtowritethisoutofmysystemsoletsspeedrunthisshit. liams story is an analogy for the horrors, pointlessness, and sacrifics of war. but over time the story shifts from a “we did this to ourselves” narrative to a “an outside force did this to use”. this shifts the goal from a need for peace to a need to protect everyone for the sake of the many. ill write more later but dear god i my hand might fall off soon

#cr #critical role #narrative telephone #telephone

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tropicalfreckles · 4 years

Note

Beej?

Anon you’ve opened the floodgates you absolute fool(i’m kidding) OKAY, let me tell you all about what I like about the smelly trash man cause if it wasn’t obvious before with me not being so subtle I have a big crush and enjoy this stupid demon a lot (crush on musical beej specifically of course LAWL)

Why I Like them: OKAY IN ORDER, first movie Beetlejuice. I enjoy he’s a big sleazy asshole that has funny one-liners every time he actually just show up in the movie. He’s a fast-talking con man that acts like a used car salesman and he has a sleazy charm to him. I also enjoy watching Barbara school his ass every time I rewatch the movie, stan movie Barbara y’all she’s a babe and will take you down. I also like to thank Michael Keaton for his performance it was a great one and we all have movie Beej to thank for the other Beetlejuices we got!

Toon Beej! Adorable, a brat, a jerk, a man that would do anything to make a quick buck and he’s gross and such a petty shithead I love him lmao. He can be pure and adorable and nice when he wants to be even if he doesn’t like to show that he has a soft side. Also holy shit all his puns??? YES?? I LOVE PUNS. His jokes, his powers, everything about this middle aged dead ghoul is A+ and ya know what when karma does slap him that’s good too cause he does deserve to get taken down a peg some times lmao. Toon Beej is someone I’d happily be friends with.

now we get to my big ass crush on a stupid, smelly BASTARD OF A BUGMAN

Musical Juice. What don’t I like about him? Besides his dumb ass plan of a green card marriage lmao (I mean movie beej also sleazy af for doing that too). ANYWAYS. What I like. His stupid smile (both blum and brightman just WHY ARE THEY BOTH SO ATTRACTIVE AHHH), his unhinged pansexual disaster energy, who tf is letting this man do coke that is a terrible idea but it gives such hilarious results, the fact that he uses his humor with his trauma he needs to NOT call me out like that lol. I weirdly relate to Musicaljuice like a lot (as someone who struggles with trying not to be petty or get jealous and stuff like that), plus him feeling invisible and lonely also hit home really hard when people in middle school and high school would randomly just drop/ghost me out of the blue. He’s such a chaotic sleaze and I just enjoy his energy and his jokes so much. His dirty humor? Sign me up I keep it clean here folks cause I got another blog for dirty stuff but I like dirty humor when it’s done right lmao. Also dadbod. Dadbod is CHEF KISS. The little things I also enjoy. How he does have an affectionate side (him being just affection/touch starved also coming for the throat cause me too), the fact that he jumped to protect Lydia after she rightfully killed him and he even gave her his cowboy hat as a goodbye present. I thought it was nice of him to yeet out of there cause he did do a lot of bads lmao. I also love how excited he got and the chaotic sibling energy he had with Lydia when scaring. I just really, really enjoy musical Beetlejuice a lot guys.

Sorry I’m such a simp for him lmao

He is my emotional support bastard

Why I don’t: I honestly do not hate his character at all, but, I can criticize his actions. To a degree. I can’t exactly say (ex. Musicaljuice)“Oh no! a demon trying to kill Lydia’s friends and family?? How unexpected!!” he’s a demon he’s gonna do evil-ish things. Which is why I applaud Lydia taking matters into her own hands good kid 10/10. and like movie Juice is a bastard sleazy man of course he’s gonna have a shitty idea as to marry a teenage girl so he can freely do whatever he wants in the world of the living. He never in the final script showed any creepy shit towards her which god I am grateful for I don’t need someone perving on this teenager that’s already having a wild time in her new house. He’s a conman just trying to have a good time but goes about it by crappy means. The petty/jealousy thing can go too far some times (but I chalk that up to musicaljuice’s sad upringing along with not having an positive relationships that we know of in his life to support him) for musical and toon juice (toon juice once again I don’t think had any friends that really understood him when he was alive and when he died so he just does whatever he wants since people already think so little of him before he meets Lydia), however with the proper talking to I think both could improve from it. Like in an analysis way I know these guys are fictional just like character development thoughts. All three have said and or done some things ranging from like small shitty things to problematic obviously. Beetlejuice is a very complex character as a whole. Movie juice obviously not as developed since he’s barely in the film to kind of shroud him in more mystery but that doesn’t mean his motives aren’t intriguing. I don’t want to make this post longer than it already is so that’s just all of my thoughts summarized.

Favorite Episode (scene if Movie): Fav movie beej scene is hard.

His first time meeting the Maitlands, his charades with Lydia, then the ending scene are all so good.

Toon Beej I’m trying to think. Once again I’ve only rewatched like 20+ episodes for the cartoon so it’s hard to pick with limited options. Uhhhh I like the haunted attraction episode lmao also the creepy tree and how he went out of his way to help Lydia move her favorite tree and in the end tried saying something nice to the tree even though eh was annoyed with it the whole episode.

Musical juice that is HARD, Blum and Brightman just own every scene they’re in shit lawl. I really like the evil plan reveal during the séance. The whole being dead pt 1&2 (the guide reprise), say my name, his scenes with the maitlands.

Favorite season/movie: Skip

Favorite Line: NICE FUCKING MODEL!! *honkhonk* (pfft)

also like... everything beetlejuice says in the musical lmao “new phone who dis”

Favorite Outfit: HONESTLY I love every single outfit all three beetlejuices wear. I want the fucking guide hat so badly!!!

OTP:

hahahaAAAHH ah. Well. Ya see here. Let’s go with the first options. Cause of a number of artists on here I’ve been pretty keen on the BeetlejuicexMiss Argentina ship for moviejuice tbh lmao. I like the idea they had an office fling. Musicaljuice and Miss Argentina sounds cute too.

I don’t actively go into the Beetlands tag but I do think the art and idea for it (after a lot of building up trust/consent/and talking) think it can be a super cute poly ship! I like.

I don’t really ship Toon Beej with anyone tbh.

so now into the self indulgent shit lmaaoo

I love people’s ocs/self inserts with the Bugman a lot and I myself super hardcore ship my oc Leilani and musicaljuice. I... maye have drawn self insert art I have no posted here out of being shy but it’s on another blog that will stay hidden lmao. I don’t normally post self insert stuff of myself cause man I can draw it easily for other people but when it comes to myself I am shy.

I mean I’m writing a fic for beej and lani as we speak and you all know by now if you’ve been following me for the past couple of months I’ve drawn a handful of doodles plus commissioned numbnutspo to draw my self indulgent ship lawl

BROTP: The obvious for toon and musicaljuice is Lydia Deetz of course. Chaos siblings. Also I have a BROTP of my demon oc Antares with musicaljuice too. Dumb demon bros.

Unpopular Opinion: TBH Idk if I have one. I like to think there’s a resounding hiss @ the ship that shall not be named lmao.

A Wish: Same wish I had for Lydia’s ask, I wanna see the musical live REAL BADLY. I also wish I could tell the cast/crew of the musical how much it has helped me get through this shitty year and how it legit just revived my passion for drawing again. I got to meet a lot of people through the musical and made some new friends. Plus I’m actually making money off my art now???

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: I wanna forget that clean beetlejuice from that one episode of the cartoon exists lmao it scares me (I mean I wouldn’t object to musical juice to taking a fucking bath or brushing his teeth but let’s be real that ain’t happening)

5 words to best describe them: Bastard, Unhinged, Handsome, 1-Brain Cell, Huggable

My nickname for Them: I mean when I refer to him or write fics it’s always Beej, BJ, Bugman, Bug, Bastard Man, Smelly Trashman, Garbage Man, Lawrence, the list goes on lawl

and now I have aired out more of my stupid obsession with this dumb demon

edit: I FORGOT HEADCANONS

OKAY HEADCANONS. Musical juice is definitely the oldest of the three, (in dead terms too, in alive terms he was ony alive for like less than 3 minutes or something), I love musicaljuice pansexual/genderfluid so much. I have a bunch but my mind is like blank rn for the rest shit sorry but I added those in at least

also I like the funny headcanon toon juice is taller than keatlejuice and musicaljuice

I also like the headcanon for autistic beetlejuice (as someone who is also autistic)

#asks #long post #anon #beetlejuice #musical beetlejuice #asks game #Anonymous

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redandfranticfeelings · 5 years

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okay ive been wanting to make a post like this for a while but i wanted to make it an essay and i dont know if i can really organize my thoughts in that way yet, so here’s a chronological bullet-pointed dump to explain my very important thesis:

be more chill is about internalized ableism, and jeremy, michael, and christine are all highly autistic coded. this is going to be very long and detailed but only because there’s a lot of details that work very well under this lens.

there’s probably even stuff i missed but this is already extremely long so it basically just functions as a way for me to collect a bunch of details that i can piece together later in a more coherent manner.

“more than survive” in the context of jeremy being autistic works so much. the theme of wanting to be just socially acceptable enough to not burn out or be harassed is so relatable, and it visually establishes very early how jeremy is isolated from his peers due to his own awkward behavior and hypersensitivity. it’s coupled with his very obvious anxiety disorder, but the social aspect just screams autistic coding to me. i take this song to basically be “not having a meltdown is basically my goal but i would love to be neurotypical enough so i can heighten my standards and actually enjoy my social life.” some choice segments:

“if i’m not feeling weird or super strange, my life would be in utter disarray, cuz freaking out is my okay”

jeremy’s house being a mess is partly due to his dad’s serious depression, yeah, but i believe the other aspect is that jeremy’s executive dysfunction makes it just as hard to clean up in his place

he gets super anxious at the prospect of his expected routine being shaken up and having to make the decision on his own of how to get to school

“so i follow my own rules and i use them as my tools to stay alive” honestly sounds like a euphemism for autism to me

jeremy not really realizing that he’s staring at chloe

“avoiding any eye contact at all” explains itself

michael’s introduction, oh my god, every time i watch this part i just adore it. i could talk a lot more about michael’s autism later but this whole segment sells it especially.

first off, michael keeping his hood up and headphones on in a deliberate attempt to avoid social interaction and stay in his own space is such an autistic mood. even before this scene he’s constantly moving in the background to his music a la stimming. in the later performances he spends a lot more time playing with his hoodie strings and even chews on them!!

the fact he doesn’t talk to or even really look at jeremy until his song is done playing also feels very autistic to me! and the way he dances so confidently and basically pretends even his best friend isn’t there for the time being because he’s engrossed in his own passions.

michael is a great friend but it’s clear that he doesn’t really understand that his coping mechanism doesn’t really work for jeremy, and that even though michael feels confident reclaiming his identity as a ‘loser,’ jeremy doesn’t really feel any better about it. i think a lot of autistic folks, or at least i do, have this tendency to assume what works for us works for everyone around us at first due to our struggles with empathy. michael tries his best but struggles to see outside his point of view. it’s mind-blindness in action and jeremy can’t communicate why it upsets him any better than michael can pick up on it not working for him.

near the end of the song, they have a brief moment where all the ensemble crowds in around jeremy and the lights start flashing, which i interpret as a visual representation of sensory overload.

we’ll talk more about her soon, but outside of jeremy’s fantasies about her, christine also avoids social interaction during this number, constantly hiding her face in a book and avoiding eye contact just as much as jeremy. people forget that she’s not comfortable with unexpected social interaction, and that really informs my headcanon for her which brings us to....

“i love play rehearsal” is an autistic anthem. it also works, possibly even better due to in-text evidence, as an adhd anthem, but combined with the above it makes so much sense for her to be comorbid autism/adhd. i did a breakdown of the song in this context before, but i’ll sum it up here

the song showcases what having a special interest/hyperfixation is like. christine is singing to jeremy, yes, but she really seems so caught up in her own passion without much regard for how jeremy is following it, and even cuts him off from responding to her once or twice because she’s just so hyped up on her own feelings. she also basically implies her happiness is reliant on her special interest which is very relatable.

lines like “you follow a script so you know what comes next” also really sell the interpretation that christine isn’t good in unpredictable situations, and has so many identity issues and likes having something to look to where things are laid out for her. i think that stability is what a lot of autistic people look for, especially teenagers.

also with that in mind, look at how upset she gets watching a play she loves about get rewritten into something weird and new that she doesn’t know.

also gotta love how she still self-isolates before this song by focusing on her book, until she has a reason to infodump to jeremy. and then feels guilty afterwards and goes right back into her book while apologizing for getting “carried away”....biiiig mood there

the whole intro scene showcases both of their awkwardness so much. jeremy gets completely thrown off by her sarcastic comment about the swim team and almost believes it, which implies that he can’t read tone very well. and then christine’s “you’re a virgin” comment comes across like she really didn’t think about how that would sound to jeremy before saying it since she only made the clarification after he was ready to panic about it. she has a habit of speaking before she thinks, i think, the self-harm comment is also very awkward considering she barely knows jeremy.

after that scene we get “more than survive reprise” where jeremy admits to routinely having such bad breakdowns that he needs to step out and go to the nurse which works for both the anxiety disorder and the autism interpretation.

i’m not quite sure whether i see rich as autistic (i see him with a lot of mental issues for sure though) so i can’t say much on “the squip song” but there’s definitely something to describing a confused autistic kid as “almost helpless.” rich definitely has a habit of giving too much information though, i’ll say that.

“two player game” is just jeremy and michael being autistic solidarity: the song. i guess this is a good place to say that jeremy and michael work well as a contrast b/w two sides of autistic community, the side that struggles to function and desperately wants a change bc they’re afraid of being alone forever, and the side that tries to love all their symptoms and embrace their autistic pride. and as coincidental icing on the cake, jeremy wears blue (associated with the derogatory views from autism speaks) and michael wears red (associated with combating said views through autistic pride).

btw you could probably attribute michael’s ability to casually down a long-expired crystal pepsi as a sort of weird sensory quirk. and his fixation w/ that sort of memorabilia honestly feels like a special interest in its own right!

both “nice sideburns....wolverine, right” and “like in x-men????” using fiction as a reference point for real life always gives me autistic vibes (esp the first point where he awkwardly uses it to start conversation). can we assume x-men is a special interest? :3

jake referring to jeremy as a ‘freak’ when the squip turns on is really sad in this context but it also does make so much sense

now we get to the squip.....and what do you know, it uses tactics from abusive therapy used on autistic children. dare i say that “be more chill” as a song isn’t just an abuser’s song, but an ableist’s abuser’s song.

first off, the “spinal stimulation.” here’s a not so fun fact: electroshock therapy has been used to discourage autistic behavior in very recent years. (content warning in link for graphic description of ableist torture)

then the lyrics, in which the squip mostly focuses on jeremy’s posture and physically punishes him for disobeying. jeremy is shown to really struggle to stand up straight and pose himself in a normal, confident way, and i think that tendency to be unaware of what our body is doing is a pretty autistic thing?

the fact the squip singles out stammering and refers to jeremy’s “tics and fidgets” brings attention to two more autistic traits of jeremy’s

the squip basically punishes jeremy for responding “incorrectly” to social situations like rejecting brooke, even if they aren’t objectively wrong. it eventually just starts speaking for jeremy because jeremy seems incapable of acting natural. the squip is an abusive autism parent.

“sync up” demonstrates jeremy’s weird relationship with empathy. he wants to be nice to everyone- will has even called him “deeply empathetic”- but he’s initially really bad at seeing other people’s point of view, which is why he positions himself as sort of against the world, seeing everyone as better than him or trying to set up these barriers of Coolness where everyone else must be perfect compared to him. he’s so surprised to learn that the popular kids also hurt because of his strict idea of the social structure. it’s a combination of low self esteem and a black-and-white viewpoint.

let’s go back to christine. the squip, already established as ableist abuser, finds her “highly unusual” for acting in a way that disregards everyone who views her. she has very strange and specific visions in her head, and it seems very natural for her even if jeremy struggles to follow along.

in later performances, she chews on her sleeve and spins around during AGTIKBI. that’s stimming, babes. also gotta acknowledge “i don’t always relate to other people my age, except when i’m on the stage”

i’m gonna use this section to talk about jake and christine. christineis a bit unsure when interacting with jake, until he validates her interest- her acting is what really touches him. but jake, while good-hearted, has trouble being self-centered and thus not fully aware of christine’s own needs and space. so christine is always a little uncomfortable around him, especially in public, and not always willing to socialize. he is right about her being kind of stuck in her comfort zone, though, not doing anything off of her stage. and he is genuinely nice to her, it’s just a matter of their social strategies clashing.

the fact that the squip blocks out michael...i’ve had a lot of times in my life where i was told that socializing with other “weird” people would be counterproductive for my social development and it was part of why i was stuck with so few friends. so i really feel the idea that blocking out the person who helps you feel confident in your atypicality is framed as a good thing so you can act more socially adept, and that doing otherwise would just drag you both down.

hot DAMN does “loser geek whatever” make so much sense for an autistic kid with internalized ableism.

“it’s not only school that’s rough, being lonely’s stupid tough” makes it pretty clear this isn’t about the school social scene as muc as it is the entire social scene of the world. we may not see it, but it’s just (not) interacting with people in general that jeremy can’t stand.

“michael says that weird is rad but feeling weird just makes me sad” as stated above, makes a Lot More Sense with the idea that michael is both a more confident autistic and really bad at addressing jeremy’s own internalized ableism and desire to make connections outside his small friend group.

everything about jeremy boiling down all his problems to his “instincts” sucking and needing to basically be told what to do really highlights how autistic kids can feel broken because of their inability to fit into the social norm, to the point where we repress every behavior that actually makes us feel comfortable and unique.

not to mention the line about him being seen as a “normal handsome guy” since autistic people tend to be infantilized and never seen as desirable (will roland also implied this line has trans coding which is another discussion altogether but i feel i should acknowledge that here)

all of those terms that jeremy calls himself near the end- namely weirdo, misfit, oddball, freak, failure- all of this sounds like the shit people throw at autistic kids. like this goes beyond anxiety alone, this is jeremy being outcasted and oppressed by the general public due to his behavior. especially the “please don’t speak” part, considering how often autistic kids are mocked for misunderstanding when to speak, how to speak, and what to talk about. jeremy needs some freaking love. :(

“michael in the bathroom” is a panic attack, related to severe anxiety, but i do see a lot of aspects that play into autism as well. the little nervous stimmy movements of foot-bouncing and picking at grout, the explosive sensory overload during the “knock knock” section of the bridge, the whole concept of losing the only person you ever managed to connect to without sacrificing who you are, dealing with this massive change to your sense of philosophy and reality where you pinned everything on one person to ground yourself, and thus you’re now completely lost trying to isolate yourself from this big overwhelming social gathering...neurodivergent anthem all around.

jeremy and christine’s couch interactions during halloween give me such autistic positivity. christine basically echolales jeremy’s weird noise and they both have so much fun vocal stimming that they forget there’s another person in the room. it’s such a sweet moment until jeremy ruins it by realizing that asking her out right after a breakup is Not Really Good For Her.

christine’s reaction to the fire demonstrates a clear case of hyperempathy to me. it isn’t discussed as much as a complete lack of empathy, but autistic folks are prone to feeling way too much especially when it comes to others’ pain. christine talking about how she hates that everyone’s hurting and desperately wants to help but doesn’t know how, and how we’ve already seen how much she struggles to connect with others like jake....it’s a very relatable, very specific autistic mood.

going back to the theme of jeremy and empathy, christine’s above hyperempathy kind of breaks this mold, and while jeremy always does feel for the other kids, by this point he feels so strongly- particularly for christine, who he also saw as a perfect confident being until now- that the squip can manipulate him into “fixing” everyone the same way the squip was supposed to “fix” him. and he never considers that christine doesn’t need to be fixed because he just projects his own insecurity that strongly onto everyone else who seems “weird” in the same kind of way- hence why he assumes michael is jealous of him back in MITB. it’s likely a result of the squip’s manipulation but i feel like mind-blindness is a factor, even if jeremy switches between struggling to process others’ emotions and being extremely empathetic.

michael’s special interest saves the day!!! :D

the whole fight b/w jeremy and michael, assuming it comes from a genuine place of repressed bitterness, has a lot of added subtext with them both being autistic. jeremy accusing michael of “giving up” on social interaction, michael envies jeremy for trying bc michael is clearly Not comfortable in most large social settings, jeremy envies michael for his pride, it just hits home for me i guess

rich calling michael “antisocial headphones kid” honestly how is michael not canon autistic

in the off-bway version michael briefly speaks too loud forgetting that jeremy’s head still hurts which is a relatable Forgot About Boundaries thing. plus him smacking rich playfully forgetting that rich is Still In Pain

“voices in my head” works nice as a fuck-societal-norms-and-just-be-happy song. “embrace the traits that make you so odd” in particular :’)

jeremy remembering christine’s infodump about her obscure bowling alley performance art idea and bringing it up to her again!!!

the squip doesn’t go away because ableism and the anxiety it brings and all the upsetting symptoms of autism don’t go away, but with the right support and confidence you can live with them!!! good message for mental disorders in general and works very well in this context!!!

so in conclusion.....be more chill is autistic pride!!!

#be more chill #bmc #actuallyautistic #autistic headcanons #long post #be more neurodivergent #queue are so busted

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