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thedarkreborn · 3 years

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Okay so. It’s not that I’m surprised that sad mean angry gatekeeper boys are losing their minds over Disney “renaming” the Slave I. I’m just annoyed that I keep clicking the links to articles about it thinking that they’ve finally actually told us what the new name is and no, it’s just the same articles about things being labeled “Boba Fett’s starship” and “Firespray” instead. That is not the ship’s new name that is not a name. That is just a label on a product. Folks, come on, stop telling me there’s a “new canon name” for the ship until there is a new canon name for the ship.

(Also like...you do remember there were years there where we only had “Hammerhead” and so on as names because the Expanded Universe hadn’t invented proper names yet and we were just using the labels they slapped on the action figures, right? It’s just that again. It’s not a new name it’s just a product label. Stop lying to me and making me think they’ve actually released their choice of its new name when they haven’t yet!)

Anyway. I'd honestly like to see them rename it as "Vessel One" or "Ship One" or even "Firespray One" (although the latter is my least favorite of the choices because it sounds too flowery for Fett tbh even though it’s just the ship type). All names that don't just keep the pragmatic, disposable vibe of the original (you don't bother to name something "One" if you aren't expecting/prepared to eventually have a "Two," right?) but are in fact even less sentimental in their complete lack of acknowledgement as the vehicle as anything unique or precious.

It's a tool, nothing more and nothing less.

That seems like a very in-character naming choice for Boba Fett tbh. At least, the old school "this is my face" practical man that I grew up knowing as Boba Fett. Disney does seem disappointingly (but unsurprisingly) determined to turn him into something else, but I'm just telling myself that this honor-code guy with an inexplicable interest in running Jabba's old palace is Spar or some other clone who thinks he's Boba Fett, because the barve I know would never.

Seriously though it would be nice to have his ship named something that I could actually put on a T-shirt (or vanity license plate! I spent almost a year when I was a small teen dreaming of getting a vanity license plate for my car and putting the name of Boba Fett’s ship on it until I realized that would be terrible! omg!!!!), though, so I'm totally in for dropping "Slave" as long as they replace it with something fittingly cold and not some sentimental osik. That would be great, actually, please?

#boba fett #star wars #and believe me i am a Classic Fett fan #we're talking old school original jaster mereel barve like that kast-killing guild-destroying cold-space-lubricant-for-blood BOBA FETT #mister ''i remove my helmet for no one this is my face'' boba fett #i was the kid in the audience for the special edition release going what the FIERFEK are you DOING #when they had him tweak rystall's chin like that what the FUCK #i had a ''she's one of his informants and that weird flirty thing was a cover so people wouldn't suspect'' headcanon before i even got home #reading all this modern shit with him being all woobie sentimental over dead jango and CRINGING what are you DOING #boba fett is not sentimental he is RUTHLESSLY practical and pragmatic don't even #yes of course when he's a wee child it makes sense he would be devastated at his dad's death OBVIOUSLY #but by the time we meet grown-ass fett in the OT he has excised emotional imperfections from himself #and the sintas/ailyn/mirta retcon actually works WONDERFULLY and cleans up so much (he was young and desperate to please a dead man sure)#of his continuity mess i can live with that and YES ''ship one'' or ''vessel one'' would be a perfect name for the TOOL he flies #and i am not spouting random ''pc'' nonsense here folks i know what i'm talking about #i KNOW classic fett i CHERISH classic fett #there is nobody who knows and cherishes the original version of him more i assure you #not dala not shysa NOBODY #so do not AT me with your fascist white supremacist fake geek boy BULLSHIT

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jngles · 3 years

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Thoughts You Definitely All Asked For on ‘The Mandalorian’ Season 2 Finale!!

These are in chronological order for the show.

One of my biggest fears about them reintroducing Boba Fett was that by removing some of his mystery, they would make him less cool. Thank god that has not been the case. He’s still an aloof and nasty piece of work but with dimensions added.

We all know the Empire is most often a metaphor for America right? At least when it’s not being Nazi Germany? The Imperial pilot talking about destroying an entire planet (of peaceful weaponless civilians no less) to stop terrorism hits a little too close to home of the nuclear bombs the US has dropped and the endless destruction of the Middle East in the “war against terror.” And of course we frame all our wars in similar language like “our troops died to keep our country safe,” which hasn’t really been true since WWII.

I do think it’s worth noting that this is the first time SW has had someone acknowledge the human losses of the Death Star blasts. Usually it’s framed as a loss in construction time, strategical advantage, and power. The Empire proved time and time again that the lives of its soldiers were utterly expendable, which always made me question why people remained loyal outside of fear. Through this pilot’s phrasing, you can see the propaganda Imperial superiors used to twist the truth to their followers, always blaming those deaths on Rebel aggression instead of prideful Imperial neglect (I.e. not abandoning ship when there was still time) or even direct Imperial aggression like Operation Cinder where they fired on thousands of their own (discussed in S2E7.)

You can’t tell me Din wasn’t into it when Cara shot that asshole pilot. That cold faced revenge shot? 100% Mandalorian style, and also very very hot.

I appreciate that it was a pretty equal match between Boba and Koska Reeves. So much of Boba’s advantage comes from his suit, but since she also has one, it’s a battle of wits on how to use it, and they even out. This both maintains his legendary badassery and also that of highly trained Mandalorian warriors, and hopefully avoids asshole chauvinist SW fans on the internet complaining abujt “pandering to feminism” (fuck off @ all of them, especially since Mercedes Vernado who plays Reeves is a WWE champ and could kick all of your asses.)

Din point blank asked how many Death Troopers there are and Dr. Pershing never answered, and that annoys me.

Why is no one suspicious why Dr. Pershing is being so helpful and revealing so much information? He totally did not have to tell them about the Dark Troopers or any of the specifics of locations on the ship. He’s still with the empire post-fall, implying he’s a loyalist, so... wtf on his part (since no tricks come of it), and “be smarter” on the part of everyone else. Unless he’s been captive as a clone engineer all this time. But couldn’t he have made his escape back in Season 1 when Din killed everyone at that lab to get the kid back?

Bo Katan really could’ve just told them how the retrieval of the dark saber needs to work in the flight before the mission instead of being vague about “he belongs to me.”

Boba Fett’s usage of “Princess” and “don’t worry about me” are a good throwback to Han Solo and the culture they both grew up in. You can never quite tell if it’s based in misogyny or resentment for upper classes, but both of them seem to use it as a shield for begrudging respect they hold for a woman they think is brave but following a fool’s errand (the Rebellion and retaking Mandalore).

The Comms Officer (Katy O’Brian) assisting Moff Gideon will forever and always look like Ilana Glazer to me, and then I get swept up imagining what would happen if the Broad City cast accidentally got transported to Star Wars.

The launch tube sequence has some amazing cinematography.

The second I saw Boba was cut off from the pack, I really thought they were going to kill him again and make his return bittersweet. Glad they didn’t.

God this team of Bo Katan, Koska Reeves, Fennec Shand, and Cara Dune is SO BADASS. I’m just obsessed with all these characters and their various motivations to get shit done. I honestly didn’t even think about the fact it’s all women until my re-watch, showing that the writers made it feel natural, the way women deserve to have their representation done. You can bet I am SO EXCITED for my future daughter and the wealth of possibilities she’s going to have of characters to play pretend as, action figures she can relate to, Halloween costumes to wear, etc. It’s so validating that we’ve gone from only Princess Leia as a female main character to all these women + Rey, Jyn Erso, Ahsoka, etc. etc.

Can’t wait for the trap remix of the Dark Trooper activation noises. (And the transition from that to the minimalist flute theme is perfect.)

The spy movie version of the main theme music is sick.

The Dark Trooper droid faces have a lot of similarity to Darth Vader’s mask. That callback is especially apparent when the one is literally lit from the inside with fire. He was already a martyr/legend to the Imperial remnants, Kylo Ren didn’t start the trend of ignoring his redemption.

Cara’s “excuse me” right before shooting up Stormtroopers is hilarious. Literally “can’t talk rn, doing hot girl shit and murdering space Nazis.”

Finally an Imperial ship got some frickin security cameras. Truly- the amount of times people just wander down hallways they’re not supposed to be in with no one being able to find them throughout the course of Star Wars is ridiculous when you think about the degree of surveillance our real life society carries out. I also love that this means The Mandalorian characters have also seen The Mandalorian.

The storytelling does such a service to Pedro Pascal and his already heroic efforts to portray emotion through a helmet. For example: Din easily could’ve killed the one stormtrooper outside Grogu’s cell much more efficiently, but instead, to show his absolute rage, they wrote in Din choking him out with a spear.

Moff Gideon would have been the BIGGEST pain in the ass in philosophy class. “Assume I know everything” my ass. I want to hear about his backstory (he would’ve been “coming of age” at the time of the Clone Wars) mostly just to hear about him getting bullied at school.

Smart move honestly, to try to tempt Din with the Mandalorian throne, given the Mandalorian power struggles of the past. Proud of our boy for keeping his priorities straight.

So has the blood from Grogu been transferred out of the ship and back to the remnant empire already, or do they have to find a new “donor” to help with building Snoke and Palpatine’s clones? Will they continue to go after him with Luke?

Lmao Din being so annoyed by Bo Katan being stringent about the tradition of winning the Dark Saber through combat is HILARIOUS, coming from a man who up until like a day ago hadn’t shown his face to a living being in decades.

The dark troopers can punch in blast doors but NOT Din’s helmet?? That’s a wild testament to beskar. Somehow that’s the comparison that sticks out to me, more even than its resistance to lightsabers.

This show works because of the cynicism of so many characters adding contrast to the moments of heart. Cara Dune is not a “fan” the way Rey was (for the record I love Rey, don’t come at her, it’s just different). Cara doesn’t see an X-Wing and go OMG THE REBELLION I LOVE THEM. She’s been through too much to believe in the magic saviourism of the “good guys,” and is instead thinking strategically when she, the one Rebel present, brushes off the usefulness of “one X-Wing.” The only positive things she seems to feel in battle situations are moments of relief and brief satisfaction in hurting the empire, with a dark knowledge that it will never make up for the hurt they did to her.

How do you keep a cloak hood on while fighting? Both from a technical standpoint (my hats fall off without me even having to move- is he expending force energy just to keep it on and look cool lol?) and also because idk, maybe it’s just me, but peripheral vision is helpful when surrounded by killer robots on a thin bridge above oblivion. I know his first lesson was to “see” through the force, but every resource helps, right?

Now that she has the ship, I wonder if Bo Katan can reprogram any salvageable Dark Troopers to help with retaking Mandalore?

There is nothing like seeing Luke’s fighting style, with its efficient choppiness and twinge of darkness. I always wonder how much is natural and how much is influenced by his first fights with Vader (that Skywalker diva flair). I love how they’ve advanced his technique but also kept him extremely “grey” here- like to straight up COMBUST a Dark Trooper takes some violent energy lol.

How tf is Moff Gideon alive after threatening Grogu’s life twice directly? That’s a wild testament to Din’s regard for Cara.

I love how seeing Luke slice through a bunch of murder droids like butter probably was a huge point in his favor for Din actually letting Grogu go with him. Like he will only send his child to boarding preschool if he knows the teacher will be a certified killing machine.

Oh my god they finally brought in some OG Star Wars theme music for Luke to take his hood off to 😭 It felt weird seeing him fight to different music, so the emotional payoff is huge when his themes come back for the face reveal.

Whoever added the digital young Mark Hamill face NAILED those classic shining Luke eyes and the earnest eyebrow lift.

Whoever shines the glass of Baby Yoda’s lil puppet eyeballs each day deserves a raise. The light caught in those babies is devastating.

Din is shaking as he takes off his helmet. This is the most enormous show of love he could give him, and possibly the last he’ll be able to for a long time. He only just got Grogu back and is desperate for a moment of real connection before letting him go once again.

This is the first time anyone has touched Din’s face since... likely his parents as a child.

Whoever wrote this scene clearly actually has kids. Anyone who’s ever had to leave a young child even just to go out for a bit or to drop them off somewhere knows that heartbreak of seeing them look in your eyes and hold on to your leg, trying to keep you with them. Especially when they can sense your mutual separation anxiety. The one thing that starts to make them feel better is something fun like a new toy or friend who can be their guide in the new environment, and R2’s friendly introduction is exactly that (since digital Luke isn’t being particularly emotive or child friendly... I hope that’s just because he’s reaching into Grogu’s mind while also keeping an eye on the multiple people with guns trained on him, not because he’s going to be totally unfeeling raising this kid.)

I love that Grogu and R2 are immediately buddies in contrast to Episode 5 when R2 was like “fuck this guy” @ Yoda stealing food and hitting him with a walking stick lol. I would imagine Luke must be reminded of that first introduction too and entertained by this display of playfulness in a *positive* light between R2 and mini-Yoda.

I need to know if Luke and Ahsoka have met- it is KILLING ME.

Does this mean Grogu will get killed by Kylo Ren when he fucks up Luke’s academy??? I will reincarnate Ben just to kill him again if that’s the case.

How does Luke not even fully SMILE at Grogu?? An adorable little baby version of his beloved master Yoda, and you’re telling me he doesn’t have the same heart stopping gasp we all did when we first saw him?? Maybe he did when they first connected through the force. He has a bit of bemusement on his face, and also wonder in his eyes, but I want a grin of recognition and welcome, dammit.

I really wish Luke had somehow acknowledged Cara Dune. Everyone else seems to see the tear drop Rebel sign and know it means Alderaan. He could’ve been like yo I have a badass warrior sister from your planet that you should meet. Or just “thank you for your service.” (I know this actually wouldn’t have been cinematically good but my heart wants it.)

Luke didn’t tell Din his name?? Or ask for any details about the kid and his care?? I could literally never let my kid go with someone, regardless of how worthy, and not be like, “Excuse me sir who are you and where tf are you taking my tiny beloved green goblin in case I need to find him? Here is my contact info. He likes to eat frogs and eggs, and he can have macarons as a treat. He’s 50 years old and his favorite toy is still a ball. Bedtime is 8pm and he’s allergic to dairy.”

Another reason I wish Luke had identified himself would be to see the mishmash of reactions that would ensue. Cara would be like DAMN IT’S THAT GUY WHO BLEW UP THE DEATH STAR AND KILLED THE EMPEROR, ACT COOL (and she would indeed act cool). Fennec would be like ugh it’s that guy who helped kill my best paying client Jabba the Hutt and then fucked over my boss Boba, I helped save the kid for THIS? And I would LOVE to know how Bo Katan feels about him, assuming she’s heard of him, and especially if she knows he’s Anakin Skywalker’s son. That confusion is probably the reason WHY the writers didn’t have him reveal himself- they didn’t want to break the emotion of the scene.

Let‘s all be real I’m just being needy about wanting things from Luke because of what he meant to me as a kid and my resulting innate need to have more canon of him, whatever it is, whenever I can get it. Especially in this form that’s so similar to ROTJ, a movie I watched on endless repeat. Even getting this was incredible though. Who else could we trust this lil heart-stealing green bean with so fully? Yet who would be so arrogant as to try to train a baby yodling (see: Ahsoka’s wise refusal)?

R2 is reckless as hell lmao. Not that we don’t already know that, but for him to just head on in, effectively abandoning Luke’s ship (how can they know if there are more troopers or not who might blow it up?) and also putting himself in the path of the ridiculously deadly Dark Troopers is NUTS. I’m usually on his side but he absolutely deserves a scolding by C3PO for this one.

I wonder if Grogu has any memories of R2 or vice versa since they did occupy the Jedi Temple at the same time. Can Grogu understand droids? They could swap stories about mutual acquaintances.

Does Din pretty much have to go with Bo Katan now since a) he’s shown his face and may not be able to go back to the Watch, and b) because he has the darksaber and has to figure out how to get it back to her without dying?

How in the hell did Bib Fortuna (whose chins age was not kind to) go from being butler to being boss? Were all the henchmen just like, “Fuck yeah, no Hutt parents no rules, let’s do what we want!!” And then they’ve spent the last ten years living off of whatever money they could salvage from Jabba’s non-banked wealth? Why has no one challenged them for that prime real estate and loot? I would love to hear that story.

Fennec Shand says “respect sex workers” so you better fuckin’ do it.

Idk dude Bib Fortuna really was a good butler, and he seemed pretty willing to comply with whoever’s in power. Did he screw Boba over in his attempt to return from the dead and earn that killing shot somehow? Or was this to make sure there was no one left who would have a claim to loyalty? Or maybe Boba just really wanted to sit in that chair.

Does “The Book of Boba Fett” mean we’re not on Din Djarin’s story anymore? Or is it a new show? I would much prefer the latter. I want to see Din help retake Mandalore or at least get a hug.

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in-love-with-darth-vader · 4 years

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My Definitive Ranking of The SW Movies (minus solo, still haven’t seen it)

#10: The Last Jedi: Okay, so, here’s the thing. I have a very good memory and I also adore Star Wars. I could not tell you five whole things that happened in this movie. It was so bad that I literally cannot remember a damn thing. Leia through space? Rip Luke? Porg? They killed my love Phasma? what else happened. I know so little that me and my dad play a game called “Did This Actually Happen in TLJ.” Apparently there was actually a casino scene and there was a planet called Crait. I completely forgot it all because I despised it so much.

#9: The Force Awakens: If you couldn’t tell, I’m not a huge fan of the new ones. I don’t hate this movie as much as I used to, but I still don’t watch it. I liked......Phasma. Personally, I just thought they tried too hard to be the originals. The characters seemed flat and boring and you know what, I didn’t care about one single person other than Phasma. I didn’t even care about the DROID. This movie was so fucking bland and boring. And I hate Kyle, so that ruins it too. (i do like some of these characters better due to TROS, but when I watched this movie, I despised them all). ALSO how dare JJ suggest that Han and Leia would 1. split up and 2. raise a piece of shit wet noodle as a child.

#8: The Phantom Menace: Here she is, the supposed worst SW movie of all time. Gotta be honest, the only thing putting it this low is Jar Jar’s existence. Literally why. Just why. Without him I really don’t see the problem with this movie. Sure, it’s a little boring, but you gotta start somewhere. Also, Duel of the Fates. That’s it. Amazing. It’s not that bad and if it’s on tv I’ll absolutely watch it.

#7: A New Hope: It pains me to put a classic this low, but this one just isn’t as fun as the other two! Again, you have to start somewhere, so of course it’ll be a little slow. I’m just also really bad at liking origin stories in ANY series I watch, so this is a personal thing. However, I adore Han and Leia. Luke is too whiny in this one but I’ll let it slide! It’s also just....old. Which is bad criticism but it’s hard to watch sometimes. I still absolutely adore it, but it’s just not my favorite.

#6: The Rise of Skywalker: So. This movie was getting slammed when it came out. I didn’t see it for a whole week because I was so scared. I walked into the previous two excited and I came out angry or disappointed. So, I walked into TROS with low expectations. I was gladly surprised. The whole time I was waiting for when it would start to get bad, and it never really happened. Sure, I have some critique on it, but it was great. Like, hey JJ, why the FUCK is force healing suddenly a thing??? What the fuck is this crashed Death Star since i KNOW it’s not the first two that blew up. Also why must we force everyone to be so hetero. ALSO thanks SO MUCH for incest being canon. the r*ylo moment made me crave death, but Kyle finally died so it was bittersweet. I really did love this movie though. They brought the humor back, and I think that’s what I was missing in the first two. They tried to be too serious. Also, I left the theater sobbing like a baby at the end out of joy and nostalgia, so it’s a good movie!

#5: Return of the Jedi: What a fantastic movie. This is actually the first movie I remember ever watching. Not just first Star Wars movie, but first movie ever. The scene at Jabba’s on Tatooine is PERFECTION. They had a great plan and then IMMEDIATELY got fucked over. Leia as Boushh is my favorite thing ever. Luke and his gay ass showing up in all black? Endor? Vader redeeming himself? Perfection. I love this movie. C3P0 as a GOD? Peak humor. Amazing movie.

Now here’s where it gets hard!

#4: Attack of the Clones: This movie gets way too much criticism. It’s fuckin AMAZING, okay? Can everyone just give Anakin a BREAK. Of cOURSE he’s cringy and awkward he’s NINETEEN. I feel like everyone who hates on this movie forgets that he’s literally a nervous, sheltered teen meeting the girl he likes for the first time in ages. Of COURSE he’d act like that. This movie has it all. The first look at the Clone Wars, Anakin beginning to fall to the dark side, Padme lookin fucking amazing and being badass, a huge arena battle, Jango Fett, I mean what more could you want. I DON’T LIKE SAND! Like seriously what is wrong with this movie. Nothing. The Obi-Wan and Anakin sass is perfect. Anakin the Angsty TeenTM is pERFECT. God I love this movie. Also, secret marriage. Fuck the Jedi, am I right?

Now it get’s REALLY hard. These next three are the three that I usually call my ‘tied for first place movies,’ but I will painfully rank them. Know that these are within an inch apart from each other.

#3: Empire Strikes Back: Oh, how it pains me to put ESB at number 3. I adore this movie so goddamn much. I love you. I know. Going to cloud city. Hoth. Leia and Han!!! Luke actually doing something. The group becoming even closer. Senile seagull Yoda. The SASS. Your Worshipfullness. Your Highnessness. SCOUNDREL? Who’s scruffy lookin! oHHhhH, he’s been encASed in CAArrBonITe! I could keep going. Also, Vader choke killing people through a screen is the best thing I’ve ever seen. I could talk about this movie ALL DAY but I don’t have enough time for that. I quote it and watch it constantly and it’s a perfect movie. It’s my number one, but number three cause the other two are just so damn good.

#2: Rogue One: CALL THIS MOVIE IRRELEVANT. SAY IT WASN’T NECESSARY. I DON’T CARE. One of the best movies I’ve ever seen. I’ll watch this ANY day of the week I don’t even care. The best fuckin characters. Jyn. Cass. Bodhi. Baze. Chirrut. The best people there ever were. K2 is the best sw droid and you can’t change my mind. This movie wasn’t about good guys vs bad guys. It was a group of morally grey people who banded together to decide to do something. They decided to do something, to take a stand, and to try to save the galaxy. None of them claim to be good people, they just decide to do what they believe is right. And even when you know they’ll all die, it still shocks you and hurts your heart anyway. Jyn Erso might honestly be one of the best sw characters of all time. Rogue One is the best group ever. I will never stop talking about this movie. “Where’d you get that?” “I found it” “I FIND THAT ANSWER VAGUE AND UNCONVINCING!” “Trust goes both ways” “welcome home” “REBELLIONS ARE BUILT ON HOPE” “i am one with the force the force is with me” “CONGRATULATIONS! YOU ARE BEING RESCUED!!” and literally all the heart eyes Jyn and Cass give each other. God I love this movie. NO AND THEN THE END. THE HALLWAY SCENE. BETTER THAN SEX. VADER SLICIN EM DOWN. BEST THING IVE EVER SEEN.

#1: Revenge of the Sith: Without a doubt in my mind this is the best sw movie ever made. I’ve seen this a countless number of times. The memes, the battle, the story, the descent into darkness, GOD it’s so GOOD. The best sw battle ever on Mustafar is the best goddamn thing I’ve ever seen. Anakin going fully black robes, the scar, the SASS. I say “Goooood Anakin. Kill him. Kill him nOw. I shouldn’t. DEW IT” every single goddamn day of my life. Palpatine is iconic. A SITH LOOOORD?? Obi-Wan is ICONIC. so this is how liberty dies, with thunderous applause is the most insane line i’ve ever heard. The HairTM. Hang on, we’re smarter than this! HELLO THERE! GENERALKENOBI! Iamthesenate! It’s treeeason then! Mastah Skywalkah, there’s too many of them, wat are we going to do?? oh no, I’m not one for politics. How is this not the perfect movie. “Anakin’s the father isn’t he? I’m sorry.” the EMOTION. Anakin just wanted to love and to save his love from death and Yoda gave ZERO fucks. Anakin may have turned to murder which is a BIG NO but no one else helped him. Anyway, Revenge of the Sith perfectly shows his struggle and his sadness and I love every second of it. The end. I could go on forever, but I won’t.

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nitrateglow · 6 years

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Thoughts on The Last Jedi (spoilers under the “keep reading” line)

I originally wanted to just make a small list of things I liked and did not like about this movie, but I’ve come to realize my feelings are a bit more complicated than I expected. I don’t hate it, nor do I think it is the worst film in the series; however, I am baffled by the arguments that it’s somehow a clever deconstruction of the Hollywood blockbuster formula or finding new ground for SW. If anything, I found it an aimless, poorly paced retread of familiar tropes and ideas with only a few interesting elements to save it from being mediocre.

I’ll start with what I considered all-around good: the acting is excellent across the board. Every actor is game, doing their best and even elevating the material at times. It was a bittersweet experience to see the late Carrie Fisher here and even with her limited screen-time, she brings a great deal of dignity and spunk to the princess/general we know and love. Mark Hamill gives one of his best performances as Luke, communicating worlds of pain and regret with his eyes alone. While he isn’t one of the greatest actors of all time outside of the voice-acting world, he is incredibly effective here. Thankfully, Oscar Isaac gets more to do this time around. And everyone else is on the whole fine, even great at times. I was also impressed with the visuals and editing, which are often breathtaking, especially on the big screen. The casino planet was pretty rad too; I can so see the rich and powerful hanging out in such a place. And—everything else is extremely mixed for me.

This movie reminds me of Attack of the Clones in that it is all over the place tonally. I am all for genre hybrids or movies that can touch on several emotional shades at once, but it is a hard thing to do and this movie isn’t up to that. One minute it’s dead serious and in the grand epic mode, then the next we’re dealing with broad comedy more appropriate for a Marvel film. That juxtaposition felt awkward in the prequels and it feels awkward here.

For all the critics’ talk of this movie breaking new ground, I remained frustrated by the same old rehash of lines and themes from the OT. There’s still the good versus evil, the empire chasing rebels Everything is also rushed beyond belief, which seems like a weird conclusion to draw about a 2 ½ hour movie. Rose is barely developed, despite her potential to be a great character (her romantic feelings for Finn are woefully half-baked; I would say the only thing that even makes you believe she was into him was her slight bout of hero worship in her initial scene with him). Finn doesn’t evolve beyond what he was in TFA. Rey doesn’t change, despite the challenges posed to her ideas about the Force by both Luke and Kylo. Her training with Luke, if you can even call it that, is basically nothing, even less than the crash course Luke got from Yoda in Empire. We’re led to believe Luke has some great development, but that’s yet another thing that has little payoff.

Overall, I am torn on Luke Skywalker’s characterization. On one hand, I believe he would become disillusioned with the Jedi after he lost his nephew to the Dark Side—however, do I believe he would stay on that island after hearing one of his oldest friends was MURDERED by the former student he feels he failed? I’m sorry, I don’t. I know people change as they get older and I know enough cranky old people to see how life can beat you down and make you emotionally exhausted. But the thing about Luke is that he’s stubborn and contrarian; when Yoda and Obi-wan told him to give up on Vader (a Sith who committed WAY worse sins on a much grander scale than Kylo-Ren ever did), he went with his hunch that his father could be redeemed, even though he had only his gut instinct as evidence to go on. I have a hard time believing he wouldn’t try to right the wrong he did to his nephew. Him retreating from the conflict feels as false as the strong-minded and very active Padme losing the will to live at the end of Revenge of the Sith. His death sits even less well with me, since I feel the character had more to do and should have been more active in trying to aid the Resistance and train Rey.

Kylo-Ren is more interesting this time around, more conflicted and morally ambiguous. His temptation to turn to the Light mixed with his savagery is great. His interactions with Rey, which are simultaneously uneasy and charged with sexual tension, are fascinating. And yet, like so much else in this movie, it all goes nowhere. I still have no clue why Kylo is drawn to the Dark Side. With Anakin, it was an outgrowth of growing up as a powerless slave and losing those he loved to war and violence, which makes it clear why the idea of a fascist dictatorship would appeal to him. For Palpatine, it was because he was a greedy psychopath. But Kylo? I have no idea what he feels he’s getting on an emotional level from the Dark Side. What do Snoke and the Dark Side promise him that makes turning evil so tempting? He didn’t hate his parents, however lacking he felt they were. Luke was hard on him, though we learn that’s because the kid was already turning to the Dark Side. So where does it all originate? I have no clue and I think, yeah, it’s not unreasonable for me to understand what motivates one of the major villains of this new trilogy. Because otherwise, it is hard for me to be fully invested in him as a character.

In fact, the whole First Order are just disappointing villains, a second-rate empire. I have no idea how they were able to come to power, not only because it’s never brought up in either this film or TFA, but because these guys are about as competent as the Three Stooges. Hux is a punchline subjected to “yo mamma” jokes and proving himself utterly useless time and again. Phasma is pretty much like Boba Fett: she looks cool and fights well, only to get killed off without ceremony. Snoke is a dumber Voldemort, built up as this clever, evil genius only to be proven even worse at underestimating his employees and enemies than Palpatine! I was never a fan of the character to begin with, finding him bland, but here, he just shows up, cackles evilly, then dies in a rather comical manner. How did he come to power? It has to be more than just his powers; even Palpatine was a politician and he preyed on the Clone Wars’ devastation to convince people to make him Emperor. But Snoke? Nothing.

The pacing was also a huge issue for me. Now, I normally dig slow pacing—but this was excruciating, probably because I felt like the story was going nowhere much of the time. Finn and Rose are wasted, given nothing but a McGuffin side-quest. Every time we cut to them, I just lost so much interest. As for the political “subtext” (if you can call an explicitly socio-political monologue subtext) in the Finn and Rose sub-story, I’ll just say I agree with critic Tim Brayton on the matter:

And this plotline feeds right into the absolutely unforgivably terrible subplot, which is the adventures of Finn (John Boyega) the cowardly ex-storm trooper, and Rose (Kelly Marie Tran), the class-conscious engineer, who go on a fetch quest that is every bit as pointless as the whole matter of the military nonsense, only even worse, because it hinges on terrible comedy, bad CGI, and a spectacularly horrible moment when Johnson stops the film in its tracks to provide a ruthlessly on-the-nose lesson about economic inequality and the military-industrial complex, and I hate this all the more for the film's message in this moment being one I passionately agree with - if something has to be artless and awful, better that it not take down a cause I hold dear as part of the collateral damage. And it really is awful; the worst thing in the movie, despite the best intentions of various film critics to defend it (I am sorry, but "has politics I like" is not all it takes to make a movie good. If all you want is for a film to spit your ideology back at you, and it doesn't matter if this is done with any grace or artistry at all, congratulations: you are a Stalinist. I like politics in movies - I love politics in movies - but not every political filmmaker is Sergei Eisenstein, and they should damn well not be treated like they are).

I have no problem with this political/social angle being there; hell, I love the idea of the Rose character and the theme of inspiring the downtrodden (the idea of legends and the power of storytelling really appealed to me, and I loved that last scene with the kids re-enacting the OT story in the stables), but like so much else they feel underwritten and clumsily implemented. It doesn’t help that this side plot feels oddly disconnected from everything else and is far less interesting than Poe or Rey’s stories. And once again, I feel like it accomplished nothing whatsoever, much like the majority of this story.

Now, people might argue the main theme of this movie is about failure and how we must learn from it, thus making this side-plot appropriate. The thing is, I don’t think anyone besides Poe learned much of anything from their mistakes or failures, let alone Finn and Rose. According to writer/director Rian Johnson, one of the big inspirations for this film was the 1964 classic Three Outlaw Samurai, a movie in which the titular heroes become disillusioned with the samurai code and the corruption of the culture in which they live. Concepts such as honor and loyalty become muddied. TLJ is clearly trying to weave a similar theme, with Kylo, Luke, and Ghost!Yoda calling for a new age in which the Jedi and Sith are no more. The problem? Kylo still embraces much of the Sith ideology as much as he claims he’s let go of it (okay, yeah, Abrams claimed he wasn’t a Sith, but that seems more like an in-name only affair given the dynamic between Kylo and Snoke), and Luke, for all his “the Jedi gotta go” lip service, ends his life by triumphantly claiming, “I will not be the last Jedi,” implying he’s passing the torch to Rey. So much for questioning the past.

At the end of the day, the movie left me frustrated and hollow. I’m not very excited to see where they take the story next, because it’s clear they’re going with same-old, same-old, only with vague motivations and no sense of direction. I don’t get what the big point of this new trilogy is. The OT is at its heart about Luke coming of age as a Jedi Knight and redeeming his father. The PT is a tragedy about the fall of both a man and a democracy. The sequels though? I have no clue. I don’t think they go far enough in their attempts to challenge our ideas about the Force or the Jedi, or good and evil. It’s the same old rebels versus tyrants fight, only this time around the villains are more inept than usual and the good guys, for all their failures, don’t appear to learn much of anything.

#thoughts #i think the conflict within me beats out even Kylo-Ren's!!

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glapplebloom · 6 years

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The Final Part.

Death Battle almost has 100 Episodes. And I went through 60 of them. But what about the other 25 episodes? I’ll mention them briefly here and in the order of release (since I lost their placement)

Season 1

Boba Fett Vs Samus - You can tell this is a first episode. Hard to get into especially when you have the Remastered version.

Rogue Vs Wonder Woman - If there is one thing I have to complain about this match, its the choice of Wonder Woman’s sprites. Other then that, it was pretty informative. Also one of the few times they use specific versions.

Goomba Vs Koopa - This was just fun to see.

Zitz Vs Leonardo - Again, the only complaint would be the sprites used for Zitz. Still a fun match. Did you know, there was a poll for Leo’s opponent. Zitz beats out Tommy the White Ranger and one other that I forgotten.

Yoshi Vs Riptor - Yoshi! You scary! I honestly thought Riptor has this, but their explanation does explain why Yoshi wins.

Bomberman Vs Dig Dug - This was my #11. Big fan of Dig Dug and never really bought some of the stuff I heard about Bomberman. And while I would have used different sprites, it was still a fun fight.

Justin Bieber Vs Rebecca Black - This isn’t as fun as Chuck Vs Segata. Fun if you don’t like them, but not outrageous enough for me.

Luke Skywalker Vs Harry Potter - Fun match. Didn’t realize they were so similar.

Master Chief Vs Doomguy - I liked that Doomguy was slow in the fight. It gave an air of “he will mess you up if he gets you”. Like a horror movie monster.

Season 2

Fox Vs Bucky - Ripping Arcade sprites is a pain in the butt! Either way, I am still glad to help make this fight into a reality.

Pokemon Battle Royale - This was a fun match to look into. Trying to figure out who would win based on info is an intriguing challenge.

Fulgore Vs Sektor - No, I don’t know why Sektor was chosen over Cyrax. Maybe because Sektor was more opposite of Fulgore’s story. He wanted the cybernization. Still, a fun fight.

Batman Vs Captain America - Surprised to see Batman won. Understandable the reasons behind it.

Iornman Vs Lex Luthor - This was a fun match to see. I figured Iornman would win since he isn’t as big headed as Luthor. And that’s saying something.

Beast Vs Goliath - Its nice to be reminded of this classic series. I just wish Goliath has better sprites to use.

Yang Vs Tifa - Tifa disappointed me. In comparison to the other main cast, she doesn’t get a lot of spotlight. I hope the Remake fixes that and gives us an episode where she goes Solo and takes out something impressive.

Green Arrow Vs Hawkeye - This was a fun fight and so frikkin close. To the research team, it could have gone either way. But those few tidbits eventually gave it to Hawkeye.

Season 3

Dante Vs Bayonetta - I didn’t research this fight because of two reasons: 1- a bad taste in my mouth during a Factpile discussion of this fight. 2- Was focusing my time on Ratchet and Clank Vs Jak and Daxter. Despite that, this was a fun match. Speaking of not personally researching.

Bowser Vs Ganon - I was rooting for Bowser. But the King of Evil is called that for a reason. Imagine Jerky making Pig Ganon sprites so we can have a Kaiju fight. But the animation was still pretty sweet.

Mewtwo Vs Shadow - Thought Shadow would win by being immune to Black Doom’s mind control. Found more incidents where he was affected by mind control, including by Black Doom. Still a fun fight.

Tracer Vs Scout - I so wanted Scout to win. But in the end Tracer was just too fast for him. Loved the fight still from the dialogue to Scout’s cockiness playing into the fight.

Season 4

Venom Vs Bane - It was an obvious outcome, but still fun to see.

Sub-Zero Vs Glacius - Glacius was tricky to research since even within the same game he has conflicting stories. But in the end, I feel the right person won. And man, are those MKX comics bloody.

Android 18 Vs Captain Marvel - While we did know 18 never used the Energy Drain outside games, it was easy to believe she never needed to use them prior. After all, if I was an evil scientist, I want to make sure my androids have every advantage they can get. But even without that, 18 was superior in every way.

Lucario Vs Renamon - I was hoping to see Ralord’s Renamon sprites to be used. But sadly, they didn’t have enough to work with. Still a fun fight.

Thor Vs Wonder Woman - Seeing the comment made with the two actors combined with knowing this was in the works was just fun. And the fight lived up to that fun.

Batman Beyond Vs Spider Man 2099 - This was my #10 before Sephiroth Vs Vergil. A great excuse to check out the comics based on Beyond. Helpful for not only DB but also my own stuff.

And that’s everything. And already Season 5 is hype.

#other

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militant-holy-knight · 5 years

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Alleged Lucasfilm Insider Spills the Beans

On May 26, 2018, on the /tv/ board on 4chan an user titled Lfl did an AMA session with the users. Given that the source was anonymous and his refusal to prove his credentials, we should take his information it with a grain of salt. Though I felt like resposting most of what he revealed. I know I am posting this with the good chance that OP was just roleplaying, but time will tell whether any of this is real or not.

>any talk of firing kathleen? She’s certainly not in good standing after the Last Jedi debacle. Absolutely hated in my department and by a lot of others I know of.

>Let me guess this is a thread where you pretend Lucasfilm is in shambles because a single movie is underperforming. Far from it, actually, but we’ve seen better days. TFA killed a lot of the creative/“anything goes” vibe we had, as evidenced by the “Art Of” book. Seriously, take a look at how cool some of the concept art we had that was thrown out for a safer approach. However, R1 was a blast to work on and felt like the old days. TLJ and Solo were very awkward to work around. A lot of wasted potential with Solo and a lot of in-fighting with both productions.

>tell me about Indiana Jones, news on the 5th film, are more films in the future? It’s in development hell. 2019 is a lucky shot in the dark. Overall, I don’t know much beyond the fact that it’s barely been moving along.

>Do you wish Kevin Feige was in charge? Are toy companies pissed off because of the lame characters and designs? Possibly. There are a number of people I’d rather have in charge of the writing, mostly some of the creative veterans like Filoni or Leeland. The general idea around here is that a “hands off” producer who could also keep things under control would work best. Hasbro is actually pissed off at the way information is handled and the focus on “earth tones” and less interesting visuals in both background aliens and main characters. Going forward there will be a push for more “toyetic” and PT-esque designs. I’ve seen some interesting IX designs, especially Kylo/Rey, who both have “battle armor” on. Kylo has some sort of red crystals on his. Not sure if Kyber or whatever.

>Is the next anthology really Obi-Wan? Any plans for Maul in other anthologies? Yeah, Obi-Wan is the next anthology. Bit of a poorly kept secret at this point, but the announcement should happen within the next 3-4 months. I’ve seen some concept art and it’s honestly breathtaking. I have a great feeling about the film as long as it isn’t stiffled creatively. Don’t believe any bullshit about Thrawn being in it. As far as I know, he’s not. Next movie is up in the air, but talks are revolving mostly around a Boba Fett/Bounty Hunters movie. After that a Solo sequel is planned depending on how well this movie does. That’s where Maul should be making his next appearance. If Solo bombs then he’ll appear in the Fett movie. Considering the Mandolorian connection between them, it’s not a bad idea in my opinion.

>When’s Kuntleen getting the boot? How exactly are you going to right the ship for Episode IX? How much internal division is there at Disney/LFL about the direction the franchise is taking? Kathleen isn’t going anywhere until post IX. If that and Solo underperform then she’ll probably be chained to a smaller project that no one cares about, (ala FOD) and given creative control to herself. 9 is going to be very different. Timeskip, more “toyetic” designs. Personally, I think the damage is done at this point. A lot of higher-ups were gunning for JJ to do all 3 movies and are losing their minds at the idea of SW becoming unprofitable. By the way, Johnson’s trilogy will most likely not happen. Overall there is a very tense atmosphere in the upper-class of the company. Very competitive overall. Lower on the ranks, everyone seems a little bit more disgruntled than usual and a lot of the “magic” is gone. A lot of people are just happy to be paid.

>Is there any truth to the rumor that they are abandoning the trilogy structure for a continuous MCU style? That’s bullshit. Trilogies will always remain. Now, the anthology movies are a different case. Those will be handled more MCU-like.

>Anon you’re exposing yourself as a fake too easily here. Nobody shills on 4chan. It wasn’t JUST on 4chan obviously, but on the internet as a whole. Journalism sites, fan sites, ect. I think the lesson Disney learned is that shilling for a SW movie is pointless when the fans are so opinionated.

>How did they try to defend it? Rian Johnson was being toted around as a “true fan of both the OT/PT” here and that was the narrative/marketing strategy for awhile. Backfired when the movie actually came out and marketing had no idea how to handle it, so damage-control mode was engaged.

>Tell me the truth, how much posting on the Star Wars reddit is paid for? I go there for a good laugh every now and then, it’s the only community I’ve seen where people are so determined to be positive about TLJ that they will include stuff like “TLJ was my fav SW movie btw” at the end of completely unrelated posts. Reddit is a huge center of the marketing campaigns, especially since the site is such a hivemind and opinions get parroted once they’re popular enough to stand on their own. /tv/ is very similar, but contrarian, and harder to control. The Force.net is another, albeit smaller, center for damage control.

>what’s Rian like? Weirdo. Easily one of the weirdest fucking dudes I’ve met, and I only met him twice. Words cannot describe how awkward he is.

>What’s Pablo Hidalgo really like? Awesome irl, but a bit of a dick online. He’s constantly bombarded though. Personally, I think Matt Martin handles fan relations much better and more enthusiastically.

>Why is Disney afraid of using classic aliens? Why are all their alien designs fucking shit and the exact same earthy-brown muppets? Honestly, the art design in the Disney films are fucking boring, uninspired and more Dr. Who rather than Star Wars. Don’t even get me started. The reasoning behind it is despicable too. That brown/earthy skin tone is cheaper to cast for the prop department than recreating the colorful classic puppets/mask. It’s all about cutting corners. The amount of humans in the recent movies is so fucking boring and everyone agrees. Hopefully that’s something fixed with the “toyetic” initiative in future films.

>what is the general opinion of the movies and characters (rey, finn, poe) in the office? Not hated, but the general opinion is that nothing will come close to George’s movies/characters. Gotta admit, it was funny to watch some of the OT purists at LFL start to appriciate the PT when TFA came out. I think those movies will age a lot better now that George is gone. I know a fair amount people who really enjoy the ST characters. Rey is obviously the most popular, but everyone seems disappointed that Finn was sidestepped and turned into a joke in TLJ/TFA.

>Are they really talking about recasting Leia? That seems like such a shitty thing to do. Unfortunately, I can confirm it’s been talked about. No idea who the picks are, but it’s a better option than CGI Leia IMO

>Do you know why Trevorrow was Fired? What happened behind the scenes in rogue one between Edwards and Gilroy? He literally had no idea what to do with IX after Rian’s Rape and flipped out. I don’t blame him, who the fuck even cares about IX in the fanbase now?

#star wars

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chipandco · 5 years

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At Stance in Disney Springs, you can step up your Disney style. The holiday shopping season is in full swing at Disney Springs with a flurry of happy shoppers trying to find unique gifts for their family and friends. I decided to head over to Stance socks to see what the buzz is all about, and see if I could find something for my husband who is notoriously hard to shop for!

Star Wars

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Marvel

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Calling all superheroes: socks assemble! The Marvel collection will surely defeat Thanos in the ultimate battle for the universe. No need to worry about your vibranium shield not fitting in your bag at the next meeting or luncheon, when you can rock your favorite superhero socks instead. My husband is a HUGE Captain America fan – posters, funko, action figures you name it he has it. When I saw they had comic socks, I knew I had found him the perfect present!

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From bootcut to anklet or working out to cozying up by the fireplace, they have the socks you need. No dull colors or designs here because it is all about being unique. Stance is not just socks though. They offer thoughtfully crafted intimates for men and women too. Plus, they have perfected the t-shirt with a reinforced collar, forward seaming, and specialized fabric.

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From youth to adult, this is the perfect spot to find great stocking stuffers. As an extra special gift this holiday shopping season at Disney Springs, receive a free stocking with any purchase over $50.

Personally, I am very picky about socks. My ex-figure skater/long distance runner feet have been through the gauntlet, and will “spit out” cheap socks which in turn give me blisters. At Stance, my feet and my family’s feet can be happy and live their best life. Leave the ordinary and embrace the extraordinary. Have you stopped in yet? Post in the comments below!

Stance: Step Up Your Disney Style at Disney Springs @stancesocks @disneysprings @waltdisneyworld #chipandco #disneystyle #stancesocks #disneysprings @disneystyle At Stance in Disney Springs, you can step up your Disney style. The holiday shopping season is in full swing at Disney Springs with a flurry of happy shoppers trying to find unique gifts for their family and friends.

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fuckyeahoutsidexbox · 7 years

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Show of the Week - Darksiders 2

Next one giffed and transcribed! Let me know if there are mistakes!

Also @outsidexboxofficial, is that Andy under that mask?

(Jane)

Hello and welcome to OutsideXbox’s Show of the Week. It’s a show, it’s weekly, and this time we’re all about Darksiders 2 and its hero, death.

(Andy)

Death, that reminds me, Mike died.

(Jane)

What?

(Andy)

Yeah, yeah, he died. He said that we should claim on his life insurance to use the money to build a better studio.

(Jane)

But, how, how did that happen?

(Andy)

Uh, that lighting rig. Remember from last week that fell on him.

[Dramatic/sad music plays]

(Jane)

Oh. Well I guess we’ll have to just try and move on and what better way than with our game of the week. The original Darksiders, released back in 2010, starred the first of its four horsemen of the apocalypse. That was War, who was framed for starting Armageddon too early. Now in Darksiders 2 you play as his bony brother, Death.

(Death)

The tree of life is where I will find my brother’s absolution.

(Jane)

As Death, you are out to clear War’s name and you’re going to do it with crunchy combat, nimble platforming and lot of lovely loot. Like the first game, Darksiders 2 does a great job of spicing God of War like action with a Zelda style hub and dungeon structure. New though is the Prince of Persia like platforming for clamboring around and the loot system for kitting out Skullface McNoMouth with ever better weapons and armour. As this grim reaper, you’ll be harvesting more random item drops than human skulls and among the rarest are possessed level weapons. These are weapons you can individually level up by permanently sacrificing other items to them. Very cool. And that’s all without delving into the skill trees that let you summon ghouls and crows or Death’s unholy winged reaper thorn. Darksiders 2 is an enormous adventure, with masses of variety but does credit to its many inspirations. For that, it’s out game of the week.

(Mike)

So here I am, genuinely dead. In limbo, killed after the pilot. And waiting for death to come and claim me. Um, I should probably check out this handbook for the recently deceased and see what I’m up against. Turns out I can challenge death to the game of my choice for a chance to claim back my soul.

[Electronic music plays]

(Mike)

How are you so good at this? You don’t even have ligaments!

(Andy)

What are we going to do for content now that Mike’s dead? He was supposed to do this feature, what is the deal with FPS’s? I was looking forward to that.

(Jane)

I, uh, guess we could contact him beyond the veil and see if he’s got any ideas for content.

(Andy)

Yeah, good idea. Let me call the psychic hotline.

(On the Phone) Hello? Uh yes I’m looking to get in contact with my friend Mike. He’s dead you see. Yeah. About 5’10, curly hair, doesn’t wear hats. Yes, yes, that’s the one.

(To Jane) Apparently, he’s left a message for us.

(Mike)

Alright guys sorry I can’t come to the phone. Currently locked in competition with the Grim Reaper in a selection of Xbox 360 games. Tell you what though, I had a snoop around his IMDB page while I waited for him to turn up. This guy is prolific. Turns out Death features heavily in video games and not just in the “I was repeatedly capped by a 12-year-old Call of Duty prodigy” sense either. The skeletal personification of Death, the Grim Reaper, must have a great agent because he’s more ubiquitous than Fearne Cotton. And very nearly as skinny too. Death might have a rare starring role in Darksiders 2 but arguably his most famous gaming appearance is in The Sims. Turning up like an unwelcome party guest to claim the souls of your neglected, malnourished, urine saturated virtual people. Previous games allowed other Sims to plead for the life of the victims but as of The Sims 3, the first in the series on Xbox 360, you have to beat him at Chess. If he’s not too busy playing Burnout Paradise, that is. Of course, when it comes to beating Death you can take a more hands on approach and thump him until he gives up. In Dante’s Inferno, the Reaper gets his bony arse handed to him within the first ten minutes of the game. Which begs the question, if his scythe isn’t powerful enough to kill a single puny poet, why does Dante bother to steal it and use it for the entire rest of the game? By and large, Paperboy was filled with pretty believable occupational hazards for a newspaper delivery boy. Dogs, skateboarders, the gradual decline of the print media, that sort of thing. Something of a surprise then to see Death turning up in suburban America with the express intention of clotheslining you off your BMX. Classic PC adventure game, Grim Fandango, featured an entire bureau of Grim Reapers of which hero Manny Calavera is one. In his role of Death, he acts as a sort of travel agent to the afterlife. Wonder how in competes with the ones offering a weekend call through with flights for less than 500 quid. Death’s a regular in Guitar Hero turning up as the “Grim Ripper” in no less than four of the games. Naturally, rather than a regular guitar he plays a heavily modified scythe. And it turns out you can perform fancy fretwork even if you have no flesh on your fingertips. Final Fantasy VII had a variety of weird and wonderful summons and while Hades shares a name with the Greek God of the Underworld, he’s the opposite of a strapping, bearded deity. With that hood and skull for a face, he’s clearly the Grim Reaper. Though he swapped his scythe for a more unwieldy cauldron. Perhaps he reaps souls with salmonella instead. Wouldn’t want to put money on which end it would come out though.

(To Death) Ah, friendly reaper inbound, right? Yeah? You know? Reaper? It’s ironic, right?

(Andy)

Well, I guess we should go through Mike’s will.

(Jane)

Yeah, right. Um. Huh, it looks like it’s just instructions on getting an achievement in Darksiders 2.

(Andy)

Weird, what does it say?

(Jane)

To whom it may concern, how are you? I am fine. If you’re reading this, I’m already dead. If you knew me, Mike Channel, in life you know I was a selfless, thoughtful kind of guy. That’s why I want my Last Will and Testament to bequeath ten easy gamer score on everyone. Or at least everyone who is playing Darksiders 2. The Triple Lindy is an easy but secret achievement and unlike most of Darksiders 2 ‘chivos it’s not one you’ll pick up just by completing the main quests and collecting all the collectibles. A few hours into the game, when you’re on the Heart of the Mountain main quest, you get access to The Foundry. As you’re working your way through this dungeon, you’ll come to this enormous open area over a big pool of water. On this wall to your left, up high, are three balconies. Now, you’re going to take Death for a swim. Jump in the pool, climb up the wall using the vines and your death grip power, turn right at the top and take a high dive back down into the water below. Swim back to the wall with the stroke of your choice, climb back on up and take a left at the top. Find the next balcony and take another dive. Try a somersault on the way down. Then it’s rinse and repeat, literally ha ha, as you reclimb the wall, go left again at the top and go for a triple pike back down into the water where you’ll find ten sweet gamer score waiting for you. So, there you go, my final gift to the world. Remember me for that, okay? And not whatever you find in my flat.

(Mike)

(singing) Never gonna give you up. Never gonna let you down. Never gonna run around and desert you.

[Sounds of bells and whistling wind]

(Mike)

HA! In your face Death! You should have rubbed it on your cloak, see ya!

(To Andy) Ahhhh. I’ve defeated Death and managed to breach the barrier between the land of the living and the land of the dead. So, all I’ve gotta do now is finish my earthly business and then I can rest in peace.

(Andy)

Well Jane’s gone for coffee, do you have time to do the feedback with me?

(Mike)

Yeah, I’ve got five minutes.

(Andy)

In this week’s comments, we hear what you make of subterranean bounty hunter adventure Star Wars 1313 which may or may not be the salvation of the floundering Star Wars franchise. On Facebook, James Chiswell-Carter said “As far as I’m concerned, it can’t be as bad as Star Wars Kinect or Episodes 1-3, sticky tongue out face”. While Paul Lawrence asks “What was wrong with Stars War Kinect? Hahaha, fooled you, yeah it was rubbish!”. Aw man, classic bait and switch there. He sent us one way than bam, went the other.

(Mike)

Jedi mind trick. In a feedback for Andy’s preview of 1313, DivineJayBob says of the placeholder protagonist “stick a hipster beard on him and he looks a bit like Andy. Maybe Andy’s Boba Fett”.

(Andy)

Yeah, I don’t see it.

(Mike)

How do you feel about hunting bounties?

(Andy)

Ambivalent at best

(Mike)

Yeah, not a big fan of coconut either. Also on your Star Wars 1313 preview, Craig Dav… urgh, David Craig… [interrupted]

(Andy)

Oh god, not this again.

(Mike)

And John Brogan… [interrupted]

(Andy)

Yeah I was doing a… [interrupted]

(Mike)

And SpazzidNinjaDude all took issue with your pronunciation of coruscant.

(Andy)

And that was the best take we got.

[clip of Andy saying the word “Coruscant” in more increasingly bizarre ways ending with saying it as “Karen Carpenter”]

(Jane)

Dear insurance agency, as you can see from this episode of Show of the Week, Mike is definitely definitely dead and that’s why we as his close friends and beneficiaries of his estate should receive his life insurance pay out in full.

(Andy)

Thank you for watching.

(On the phone) Mike? Yeah, they bought it.

(Jane)

Camera’s still on.

(Andy)

It went off without a hitch.

(Jane)

Camera’s still on.

(Andy)

Oh, sorry, sorry.

(On the phone) Yeah, so we’ll split the money three ways.

(Jane)

Still on!

(Andy)

Oh, yeah sorry, sorry. Illegal things are the best!

#outsidexbox #andy farrant #mike channell #jane douglas #transcript #show of the week

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liambaileyjournalism · 6 years

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In a recent chat with Chris Parsons, I managed to ask him about his time portraying several characters in the Original Trilogy. Listed below is a biography of some of the characters Chris has played.

4-LOM was an ambitious LOM-series protocol droid who overrode his programming and became an intergalactic thief and later a bounty hunter. He often worked together with Gand findsman Zuckuss. Following the Battle of Hoth, both 4-LOM and Zuckuss were hired by the Sith Lord known as Darth Vader to capture Han Solo, captain of the Millennium Falcon and hero of the Alliance to Restore the Republic. However, the bounty on the smuggler’s head was instead claimed by the infamous Boba Fett.

K-3PO was a 3PO protocol droid who served in the Alliance to Restore the Republic during the Galactic Civil War. The droid was stationed at Echo Base on the planet Hoth and was destroyed when the command centre sustained enemy fire during the Battle of Hoth.

E-3PO units were a subset of the 3PO-series protocol droid line. Developed for Imperial use, E-3POs possessed the TechSpan Ipropriety module, which allowed them to interface with a wide variety of networks employed by the Galactic Empire. Their obscure and rare status led to E-3PO units developing arrogant, superior, and haughty attitudes, which would gain them a degree of notoriety throughout the galaxy.

R-3PO was a 3PO unit protocol droid with distinctive red plating and a moody attitude. During the Galactic Civil War it served the Alliance to Restore the Republic in their fight against the Galactic Empire, and when the Alliance established Echo Base on the planet, Hoth, R-3PO was tasked with keeping a lookout for spies within the base. The droid was present for the Battle of Hoth, which the Alliance lost, forcing them to evacuate Echo Base.

How does working on Star Wars compare to all your work on other projects?

Nothing else compares to the magical ideas that appear when working on this type of film.

How did you get the role of body double for C-3PO?

I was asked to go to Elstree, where I was shown into a dressing room and the C-3PO costume was on the bed, I was the right size fortunately for all the measurements and therefore, I got the job as the double for C-3PO, I learnt the walk and the voice.

You were also given the roles of 4-LOM, E-3PO, K-3PO, R-3PO, Stormtrooper, Snowtrooper, Death Star Droid, Rebel Soldier and a Snowspeeder Pilot. That’s quite a lot of roles, How did you end up playing so many characters and can you describe your time filming scenes?

E-3PO & C-3PO

C-3PO & K-3PO

E-3PO & C-3PO Hoth Base

R-3PO

Death Star Droid

On this type of project, the assistant directors are looking for people who are reliable and can deliver, which is why I ended up with so many roles. Sometimes even one scene could take nearly all day but you had to keep yourself available at all times in case I was called for.

How long did it take to get into all your different costumes?

Most of my characters had the body of C-3PO which were changed slightly, these took approx. 20 mins or so to get into. The other roles were around 10 mins.

What was your favourite character to play and why?

During filming, I had no preference but in later years due to the fans, it has become 4-LOM.

What are some of your fondest memories from your time in Star Wars?

The list is endless, but I consider myself very fortunate to have been valued to do K-3PO in Hoth and C-3PO in Endor.

Was there much interaction between yourself and the directors, if so, what sort of things would you discuss?

I did have interaction quite a lot with George Lucas on the Trilogy and especially with the great Irvin Kershner. My discussions with George were mainly concerning daily schedules whereas with Irvin, it was being asked to perform various shots in a certain way.

If you could play any other characters, who would it be and why and who are some of your favourite characters from the franchise and why?

Obviously, C-3PO would be my first choice to play as that droid got me the job on set in the first place. My favourite undoubtedly has to be Yoda, it was fantastic to be around this character whilst filming.

What does Star Wars mean to you?

Being involved with Star Wars has to be one of the best experiences one could wish for, it is a joy to know the lovely fans appreciate my characters.

Did you ever think your work would lead you to be in a franchise like Star Wars?

Up until I auditioned for Star Wars, I just enjoyed the film business working on some classic films and I had no idea what was around the corner which would change my whole future.

What are some of your highlights filming Star Wars?

Working with Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher was a great honour and we had a lot of conversations and laughs.

What are some of your favourite scenes from Star Wars and why?

I enjoyed the Big Planet scenes and those of the Carbon Freezing chamber, both of these sets were believable.

Do you attend many comic conventions, if so, what does fan interaction mean to you, and do you have any appearances coming up?

Fortunately, I am asked to do convention worldwide, the fans are very important to the events, it is always a privilege for me to speak with them to discuss my characters and stories which they seem to enjoy. So far this year due to my other business interests, I have some negotiations ongoing for a few shows later this year.

Are you open to doing more work for the Star Wars franchise in the future?

It would be great to be asked to work on future Star wars episodes and this is something that my agent is exploring.

Stay locked in for more Star Wars Interviews coming very soon, and may the force be with you all!

Chris Parsons – The Actor behind 4-LOM and Several Others in the Original Trilogy! In a recent chat with Chris Parsons, I managed to ask him about his time portraying several characters in the Original Trilogy.

#actor #disney #droid #empirestrikesback #featured #film #interview #rebels #returnofthejedi #sci-fi #star wars

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