#and bounces around the box and doesn't always hit that button

[holotape-diaries]

[ Cillian ] Circumstance

My name is Cillian Ward, and I'm 33 years old. Well, 243 years old, I guess.

I've never been one for keeping journals, but Pops always said its incredibly important in times like this, helps keep your head straight and memories sound.

So here goes, I guess? Sorry if this doesn't sound professional, I'm just typing words as they come to me.

The bombs fell Saturday morning, October 23rd, 2077. Pops managed to get me a place in the vault before he died a few years back, and I didn't want that to go to waste. So many people couldn't get in. I wanted to help but the boots in uniform pushed me onto the elevator after confirming I was on their list. Before I could object any further, a bomb hit. Giant mushroom cloud, south of Boston. It was so bright. The elevator started going down, I heard the shock wave go over the top of the elevator shaft.

I don't remember much about going into the vault itself, other than being in some kind of shock. I remember being given a vault suit to change into, then being asked to climb into a "decontamination pod", which I did. My immediate memory following that is waking up face-down on the floor in the pod chamber.

Most of my neighbors were dead. Most seem to have passed away in their sleep in the pods after the life support failed. 2 other pods were open. One was my old neighbor Nora, she had a gunshot wound on her chest. The other pod was empty, and I'm assuming it was her husband Nate, because I couldn't find him in the other pods, and her wedding ring was missing. I hope he's doing okay. And that he wasn't the one who shot her.

The vault had been cleared out as best as I could tell, being woken up from cyro-sleep really gives you a headache. Apparently the cockroaches are bigger now? I'm just glad I wasn't the one who had to deal with them, they were all dead by the time I was leaving. I had to take one of those Pip-Boys off one of the bodies at the hatch. The hatch was already open, which I'm assuming was Nate's work, but the elevator wouldn't come down unless I had a Pip-Boy plugged in when I hit the button.

There is snow covering everything now. Which was great when the elevator reached the surface, the sunlight bounced off the snow into my eyes and really helped the migraine I had. Spent a while resting in the little command station at the top of the elevator to let my head clear up and my eyes adjust. I also looked up the date while I was in there, that was a nice little shock. 210 years to the day since I went into the vault.

I made my way back down to the neighborhood, Sanctuary. The name doesn't really fit anymore. Nate and Nora's old Mr. Handy was trimming a dead bush. Codsworth, I think they called it. I gave it a wide berth, I don't think he noticed me. My house was a wreck, and I could hear noises inside. The root cellar was still locked and the hiding spot for the key was undisturbed, which I took as a good sign. I unlocked the root cellar and ducked inside, locking the door behind me. Pops gave up on converting this into a bomb shelter pretty early on when he realized it wasn't deep enough to provide meaningful protection from any radiation, but he still kept it stocked up and livable for other emergencies. Old man was obsessed with survival and I'm glad. Surprisingly most of the food was still good, I tried not to think about what was in the preservatives that let them last for this long. After some food and drink, I laid down on the mattress and fell asleep before I realized it.

I woke up a few hours later, undisturbed. The cellar door was still locked. All of the lessons Pops taught me on our camping trips over the years makes me think that falling asleep there was not a smart thing to do, but Pops never really taught me what to do after being frozen for 200 years. Can't really blame him for that though. I grabbed the handgun he kept down here, a Five-Seven 10mm, a few boxes of ammo and a change of clothes. I feel like walking around in a vault-suit might attract more attention than I'm comfortable with. Not too sure about the Pip-Boy either, but that seems to have some very useful features, so I'll live with it for now.

I opened the doors of the root cellar to light snow. I've since learned the clear skies I saw when leaving the vault are a rarity, as the weather seems to be fog, snow, fog and snow, or blizzard for the most part. I checked out my old house, unfortunately its not just the cockroaches that are large now. Had to use the gun to kill some giant flies. I told myself then that my assumption should be that all bugs are huge, and unfortunately that's proven to be correct so far.

I was able to scavenge some goods from the other houses in the neighborhood before Codsworth noticed me. The robot seems a bit senile but wasn't hostile. It kept talking to me as if I was Nate? I think everything that's happened has left him somewhat worse for wear. Codsworth eventually mentioned that there were survivors down in Concord, before abruptly turning away and trimming the same dead bush he was trimming before.

I found a few bobby pins while I was investigating the other homes, so I took the opportunity to pick the locks on some of the safes I found. I figured I should shake off some of the rust and its not like these families were around anymore to miss this stuff. I'd always suspected one of my neighbors to be a chem dealer, and I feel that the copious amounts of ammo and chems I found in his house proves my theory. I had to disarm a bomb before I could pick his safe. His terminal still worked by some small miracle, but it was locked and I never could figure out how to properly hack those things. Pops tried to teach me, it was just one of those things that never stuck.

Crossing over the bridge, I found two dead bodies, a man and what appeared to be a hairless dog. I rolled the man over, it wasn't Nate. He did have a nice heavy coat I was happy to take possession of, and there was a military duffel bag underneath the minutemen monument nearby containing a combat rifle and some ammo. I took the time to head back into Sanctuary and cobble together a crude scope for it.

Across the bridge again, I ran into my first living person. Dressed in rags that seemed entirely inappropriate for the weather, they stopped me and thanked me for saving their life? Before I could say anything they pressed a bottle cap into my hands and ran away. I stuffed the bottle cap into my pockets and made my way to the Red Rocket. I used to come here for Nuka-Colas back in the day, now it just sat empty. As I walked into the Red Rocket a dog ran up to me. This one wasn't hairless like the dead one up the street, looked like a German Shepherd mix? He seemed friendly enough. I named him Paddy, but I've since been told that his name is Dogmeat. Dogmeat seems to want to stick with me and I can't say I hate the company, I've always loved dogs.

As we were leaving Red Rocket, Dogmeat and I were attacked by what I can only describe as giant naked mole rats? I read about these things in a text book years ago when I was in school, although I'm pretty sure they weren't this big or aggressive. I'll chalk this up to the radiation, like the bugs. Bullets seemed pretty effective against them, at least.

As I made my way down into Concord I took the time to investigate the empty houses I could get into and this seems like a good habit, as I found ammo, medical supplies and other useful sundries, including a messenger bag to help carry things.

I was about to turn onto main street when Dogmeat barked and growled. I stopped and heard gunshots ringing out. The snow had picked up into a blizzard so I couldn't see more than a dozen or so feet ahead. I don't know if Dogmeat is trained or not, but either way he's an incredibly useful companion to have.

I ducked into one of the nearby shops with my pistol drawn, poking my head out of the doorway to try and see what was going on. Between the gunshots I could hear shouting. They were shooting at the Museum of Freedom, and someone was shooting back with a laser rifle, based on the energy bolts.

While I was creeping closer I got shot at. The bullet only grazed me but still caused my neck to bleed pretty badly. After patching myself up, I shot the man who shot at me. That was my first time killing someone. I've been told since then that these people are known as Raiders, barbaric and nomadic gangs who would sooner kill you for what you have than try and ask for it. Even though its self-defense, I still don't like the idea of taking a life. Unfortunately that seems to be the rule of nature now.

When the fighting had stopped, an individual on the balcony of the Museum of Freedom shouted for me to grab the "laser musket" on the ground nearby and come inside to help him, as there were raiders inside trying to get to a group of survivors he was protecting. I grabbed the laser musket he was referring to, some kind of modified laser rifle with a hand-crank, some energy cells, and ducked inside the museum.

Almost instantly I was getting shot at, so I had to duck into a hallway to the side. After figuring out how to arm it, I used the laser musket to slowly clear out the museum. This place was a total wreck, the whole middle floor seems to have caved in. The raiders equipment seemed to be all over, most were using what appeared to be home-made weapons, but a few had some clearly made before the bombs fell, notably one had a hunting shotgun I took for myself, while another had some thermal goggles. I questioned where they found such a treasure but did not linger on it for long.

With the threat inside cleared out, the man from the balcony opened the door to the office they had been holed up in, and introduced himself as Preston Garvey, a minuteman. After getting over the chronological whiplash, Preston and one of the survivors named Sturges filled me in on their plan to escape. Would I be willing to pilot a suit of Power Armor, rip a mini-gun off of the crashed vertibird, and escort them to safety? All they needed was a fusion core from the generator down in the basement, which was behind a locked door.

Pops actually worked on some of the early prototypes for Power Armor and I always liked seeing them in action on news broadcasts, even if the circumstances around their deployment was one of conflict. I agreed to help out and quickly made my way down to the basement. The lock on the door wasn't particularly complex, so I grabbed the fusion core and made my way to the roof.

As I slotted the core into the Power Armor, I could hear shouting from the street. Sounded like raiders and something more… robotic? The voices that I assumed were raiders were shouting something about "synths". I climbed into the Power Armor and ripped the mini-gun off of the vertibird. They weren't kidding about the extra strength the Power Armor gave, the mini-gun came free without effort on my part.

I peeked over the edge of the roof, but the blizzard was made it difficult to see what was going on down on the street. I hopped off the roof and landed on the street with a very satisfying crash. In the moment, the mini-gun felt like overkill, so I put it down and used the hunting shotgun I found earlier to clear out anything shooting at me. Upon closer inspection, some of the bodies appeared to be robotic in nature, I assume these were the synths I heard the raiders shouting about.

My scavenging was interrupted by a loud crash, followed by a deep roar and screams coming from the end of the street. I couldn't see through the fog. Somehow Dogmeat had made his way down to the street, he was growling at whatever was in the fog. The screams stopped. I armed a mine I had taken off of one of the raiders inside he museum and tossed it down the street in the direction I had heard the noises.

Then I saw it. Hunched over but still taller than me by a few feet even in Power Armor. Long horns and claws. It roared at me and I felt a primal dread unlike anything I'd felt before. The closest thing I can equate it to is a fucking dinosaur. Did radiation do this?

The creature lunged forward over my mine, the explosion snapped me back into focus. The creature was injured, but not quite dead. 5 bursts from the shotgun put it down before it got to me.

Heart racing, I took the time to make sure there were no other threats on the street before scavenging what I could from the remains of the raiders, synths and this creature. One of the raiders had a key labelled "Corvega". I'm not quite sure what it means, but I held onto it. I picked up the mini-gun, making a mental note that there is no such thing as 'overkill' anymore, and headed back into the museum.

Preston gave me some energy cells and bottle caps as thanks for helping his group out. Apparently bottle caps are the de-facto currency now. Preston said he wanted to take the group up to a place he'd heard about called Sanctuary, I said I'd escort them up there as I was headed there myself. One of the survivors, Mama Murphy, started talking to me about my "destiny". Except she started talking about "my son". I told her that I don't have a child but she seemed to ignore me, and told me to head to a place called "Diamond City". I mean, okay I guess. I know Nate and Nora had an infant son, Shaun I think his name was, I didn't see him in the vault. Mama Murphy said she had visions from something called "the Sight". If such a thing were true, could her "vision" actually be meant for Nate?

We left the museum and I led the group towards Sanctuary. Preston told me the giant lizard thing is called a "Death Claw". The name seems fitting. Apparently they knew about Sanctuary because of another one of Mama Murphy's visions which seemed to be the cause of some strife within the group, although when Sturges asked for other ideas, none were given. As we crossed the Sanctuary bridge, the energy reading on the fusion core was less than 20%. I walked the suit over to an engine hoist rack in the driveway of one of the houses and got out. The hooks on the hoist lined up rather conveniently with spots on the Power Armor, so I connected the hooks and removed the fusion core. This way no one else could use it against us while it was not in use.

As everyone else filed into different houses, Preston pulled me aside and thanked me again for helping him and asked me for my opinion on Sanctuary. Without thinking I told him it's not like it used to be, confusion Preston greatly. After he asked if I was a "Pre-War Ghoul", then explaining to me what a "Ghoul" even is, I told Preston I lived here before the war and that I had just woken up from being cryogenically frozen. Preston took it much better than I thought he would. Eventually he asked if I would be willing to help him re-establish the Minutemen. He gave me a brief explanation of the group's history, and asked if I would be willing to provide assistance to a settlement further to the south in his stead, as he was focused on keeping this group of survivors safe.

Many years ago, while I was still in high school, I was out camping with my father. The year was ending and I'd found out I'd failed a class, and I remember dreading the thought of telling Pops. We were sitting on the dock of a lake fishing, and I told him about the failed class, and that I would have to take it again next year, and apologized. I expected him to be mad, or disappointed. Instead he smiled, laughed and put his hand on my head. He told me that the only expectation he has of me in this life is that I'm a good person, and that I make time to help those in need when they need help.

My father's words echoed in my ears as I agreed to Preston's request.

That's where I'm at. I've been helping the survivors get settled in Sanctuary. I managed to get Pop's old terminal back online, which is how I'm writing all of this. Once things seem to be sustainable I'm going to head south to the settlement Preston mentioned.

I guess that's all for now. I don't know when I'll get the chance to update this again.

- Cillian

#fallout 4 #character story #cillian ward #creative writing

[teaandinanity]

Me: [is reminded the musical Fun Home exists]

Me: [spends the next three hours listening to Maps every other song]

#I suspect this musical hits very differently if you've lost a parent pretty young #like my relationship with my dad had almost 0 overlap #but the way the musical is structured and deals with grief and reframing the past hit me directly on an emotional bruise #which has still not healed after almost two decades #so when I first saw it I cried several times and I still have to kind of stop and catch my breath at a few songs #and maps is one of them #I saw a post once talking about grief as being like a button in a box #and there's a thing in the box - a balloon or a ball or whatever #and when the loss is fresh it's full and it presses on the button all the time #persistently and painfully #but as time goes by it gets smaller #and bounces around the box and doesn't always hit that button #but when it does the pain is the same it's just not all the time anymore #I suppose it's also true that the older I get the more context I have for the grief #but it's so strange to realize that it won't be that long until I'm older than my dad was when he died

[peterrparrkerr]

Hit mad falls in love with target - read on ao3

*-*

Peter waved frantically at Tony when he walked into the lab, eyes glued to a computer screen.

"Tony, quick! Look!" He demanded, nearly vibrating in his chair.

Tony made his way over, hands clasped behind his back as he leaned over Peter's shoulder.

"Isn't it awesome?" The young man asked, waving his hands around.

"What am I looking at?" Tony asked.

"Its cancer," Peter said. He points to different colored lines in the graph, all jagged and fluctuating. "This is breast cancer, and this one is pancreatic, skin, lung."

Tony hums as Peter continues to list each colored line as a different form of cancer.

"I was able to isolate the individual cells from everything else, and- look, look!"

Peter snatches Tony by the shirt sleeve and tugs him from one monitor to the one on the other side of the lab. He taps his fingers on the screen, bouncing on his heels.

"These are the cells after being treated with non-radioactive therapy," Peter said, looking up at Tony. "The number of cancer cells is cut in half within a week!"

Peter then drags Tony across the lab again, babbling excitedly as he does so. "Do you know what this means? This means we can start human testing! And we can market the treatment for practically nothing!"

He shows Tony a live feed of the treatment in action from a TV monitor.

"Think about the possibilities," Peter grinned. "Anyone can get treated, no matter their financial standing. And the treatment isn't as harmful as chemo or radiation. It doesn't attack the body as a whole, it isolates the cancer cells and leaves the rest of the body alone.

"No more hair loss or side effects. And we could cut remission in half too," Peter said. "Just think, this time next year, we could start selling to hospitals all over the world."

Tony smiles down at the younger man. He had known within the first day of meeting Peter that he wouldn't be able to follow through. He's glad he hadn't.

"Have you told anybody else?" He asks casually.

"Ned knows," Peter said. "And Bruce, but they were here when it happened."

"Where are they now?"

Peter gives Tony a wry smile, still too excited about his treatment working.

"I sent them home a couple hours ago," he said. "We've all been awake for almost three days, so I'm sure they've gone to bed already."

"You should be in bed too, don't you think?" Tony asked, raising an eyebrow.

Peter waves him off, shaking his head as he goes to his work desk. "I'll sleep later," he said, pulling his lab coat off and draping it over the chair.

He's dressed in his usual outfit; comfortable pants and a button up.

"Plus, I knew you'd make your rounds around this time, and I wanted to tell you," Peter said with a grin, grabbing his personal items.

That was part of Tony's cover. A janitor for the building Peter worked for. Hes wearing a navy blue jump suit, though he's left the cart out in the hallway.

"I'll walk you to your car," Tony hums, leading the way out. When he'd first started this, he'd offered his company to get closer to Peter -to find his vulnerabilities.

Now though, he does it because he's protecting the young scientist.

He'd skipped out with 45 thousand dollars paid to kill the boy, but as the days had gone on, and Peter had grown comfortable with him, Tony realized he couldn't steal him from the world.

Peter was incredible. He worked tirelessly to find a cure for cancer. He's already created a new insulin for diabetes that he's made available to everyone for only $10 a month -something not many other medical professionals liked.

Peter was making enemies left and right, and Tony decided to make it his job to keep him breathing. If not for the rest of his life, then for as long as it takes for the young scientist to see an end to cancer.

The boy wasn't getting much in terms of money for his creations. In fact, from what Tony's come to learn, the boy doesn't own a car, and rents an apartment with his aunt. 

He sees enough to live paycheck to paycheck and this new treatment won't do much to better his life, but he's not concerned with money. He wants to make Healthcare more effective and affordable.

Tony's got morals. Enough of them to know when a hit is a bad investment. That didn't stop him from taking his payment anyway.

The two make it to the car park. Its dark, the overhead lights buzzing annoyingly. Its empty, save for a couple cars belonging to a few of the security guards, and the car Peter shares with his aunt.

It's an older model, grey paint chipping and metal beneath rusting near the wheels. Peter talks animatedly beside him, lands flailing in front of him.

Tony glances around them, scowling as he takes in the familiar cement structure.

"Wait," Tony says, just as Peter's pulling the keys from his pocket. They're a couple feet away from the car, and the hairs on Tony's arms and neck stand on end.

"What is it?" Peter asked curiously, reaching for the door handle.

It's just as Peter grips the handle that Tony sees the wire connected to the metal lock on the other side of the glass.

Tony is quick to react, grabbing Peter by the arms and wrenching him away from the door.

Peter yelps in surprise, but its cut out by the sound of a small explosion. Tony braces for the blast of air that knocks the two off their feet, and grits his teeth at the heat that follows.

Peter's pressed against the cement, Tony weighing down on him. His ears ring, but he quickly gets to his feet, unzipping his jumpsuit and grabbing the .9 mm from the waistband of his jeans.

The car is ablaze, crackle-popping and sizzling. Its just the cab thats on fire, but Tony knows its only a matter of seconds before the flames reach the engine and the fuel line.

Tony looks around him, trying to find the culprit -though he knows from experience that the man won't be here.

He grabs Peter by the armpits and pulls him to his feet. Blood smears against his forehead and jaw. His hands and arms are scraped up and Tony can tell his knees are busted too, but it doesn't look like anything damaging.

"We gotta go," Tony urges, already half dragging the younger back towards the building.

"You-you have a gun," Peter gapes, stumbling after Tony, arm in the older's hard grip. "Why do you have a gun?"

Tony reaches the door for the stairwell.

"I'm a hired gun," Tony said, glancing up, then down, gun following his eyeline before pushing Peter towards the stairs going up.

"I thought you were a janitor," Peter gasped, climbing the stairs and swaying. Tony places his free hand on Peter's lower back.

"Thats just a front," Tony confessed. "We got to get you out of here."

"Someone blew up my car," Peter said, panting as they continue up to the first floor. "Aunt May is gonna kill me."

"Not if Buck doesn't kill you first," Tony grunted, pulling Peter out of the stairwell and into the main lobby.

Tony's car is around the side of the building, but its open to attack. Tony can't keep Peter trapped inside the building though, so he risks it.

Their feet slap loudly on the asphalt as they run for the nondescript black SUV Tony had taken to driving.

He checks around the vehicle, under and inside before issuing Peter into the back seat.

Tires screech as Tony peels out of the parking lot.

"What- whats happening? Tony, what- why do-"

"Someones trying to kill you, Peter," Tony said, blowing past the guard tower at the exit of the parking lot.

"But why?" Peter asked dumbly, voice slurring slightly as more blood turns the side of his face crimson.

"I'll answer all your questions when we're safe," Tony promised, eyes frantically shifting from the area ahead of him to the rear view mirror.

Peter must really be feeling the effects of his head slamming into the concrete, because he doesn't protest.

"Lay down," Tony orders, merging into traffic and slowing down. "Lay low until I say."

Peter does -Tony thinks mostly because of his head injury. Tony relaxes a little, knowing the scientist won't be gunned down in the back seat.

"Where are you taking me?"

"Somewhere safe," Tony answered, keeping an eye behind him.

He doesn't see a tail, but he takes a round-about way to his safe house, just outside of Queens.

When they get to the small cabin, Tony checks the building before helping Peter inside.

"I think I have a concussion," Peter mumbles, swaying on his feet as Tony guides him to the kitchen chair.

"I don't doubt it," Tony agrees, setting his gun down on the table beside Peter's elbow before grabbing the first aid kit.

He pulls another chair over in front of the young scientist and opens the red box.

"Let me see your hands," Tony orders. Peter does, palms up. Tony begins to clean them and his arms.

"Tony," Peter says, breaking the silence. Tony doesn't say anything. He reaches up to clean the blood from the side of Peter's cheek.

"Is your name actually Tony?"

Tony makes eye contact before nodding.

"And you're a hired gun?" Peter asks, slightly breathless. "Like, like a hitman?"

"Yes," Tony answers, reaching the cut on Peter's hairline. Peter winces, but doesn't pull away.

"You kill people for a living?"

"Yes."

It takes Peter a couple seconds, but it seems to hit him. Hes bolting to his feet, the chair clattering behind him.

Tony leans back into the chair, watching as Peter begins to pace.

"What- Tony, you have to tell me whats going on," Peter demands, hand on his head. Tony knows from experience that pacing tends to help the scientist expell excess energy.

"I will," Tony nods. Peter continues his pacing. Back and forth beside the kitchen counter.

"Why- why are people trying to kill me?" He demanded. "Who blew up my car?"

Tony sets the paper towels down on the table, knowing Peter won't sit still for him to properly tend to him.

"The one who blew up your car is another hitman," Tony said. "Goes by the name Winter Soldier."

"You called him Buck," Peter said, pointing an accusatory finger at Tony, eyes narrowed.

"I did," Tony nodded. "Hitmen tend to run in the same circles, though we don't always like each other. Bucky was probably hired to finish the job."

"Finish the job," Peter repeated dumbly. "I'm the job?"

Tony nods, once more letting Peter process. He knew Peter would figure it out without Tony's help. He was smart.

"Finish the job means someone already tried to- to kill me," Peter said, panting as he continued to pace. The wound at his hairline is bleeding sluggishly, dripping down his temple and towards his jaw.

Peter wipes at it without thought, smearing blood against his cheek. He pauses to look down at his hand, fingers glistening in red.

He touches his forehead again, as if remembering he's still injured, then turns to Tony, accusation and fear in his Bambi brown eyes.

"You," he said softly, in disbelief. "You were hired to kill me, weren't you."

"I was," Tony nodded.

"But you haven't," Peter said. Tony can practically see the gears turning behind his eyes. "And, and now whoever hired you hired the Winter Soldier."

Tony only nods. Peter takes a shuddering inhale and has to grip the counter with a bloody hand to stabilize himself.

"I'm- I'm- who- who would want to-to kill me?!"

"The payment was anonymous," Tony said. "Thats how it works. But whoever it is is threatened by you."

Peter looks at Tony incredulously. "Me? Why me? I'm the least threatening person -like- ever!"

"You've cost Big Pharma millions with your insulin," Tony said. "You've patented it, so they can't take it and upcharge the way they've been doing. And if your treatment for cancer is a success, you'd be costing them even more."

Peter takes a moment to process that before he nods. "Right, yeah. I knew I was going to make a lot of people mad about that, but. But I never expected anyone to actually try to kill me."

"Money is a powerful motive," Tony said, a little too much experience leaking into his tone.

Peter hears it, because he stops his pacing, shoulders dropping. Exhaustion seems to pull him towards the floor like an anvil tied to his spine.

He sways a little, and Tony's about to offer him the chair again, but he moves to it willingly. When he sits, their knees are barely touching, and he blinks dazedly at his bloody hand.

Tony grabs a clean rag and leans forward to clean up the blood from Peter's head. The younger lets him, still processing and no doubt sluggish from the concussion.

"Why didn't you?" Peter asked after Tony had taped gauze to his hairline. It was patchy and poorly done, but it would help.

"Why didn't I what," Tony hummed, using an alcoholic wet wipe to clean the remaining blood from Peter's hands. The boy winces at the burn to his scraped palms.

"Kill me," he said, swallowing thickly. "You had plenty of opportunity."

Tony sighed, setting the wipes down before leaning forward and looking Peter in the eye.

"Because I believe in the work you're doing," he said honestly. "And I'm going to make sure you finish it."

Peter blinks once, twice, before breaking eye contact and sighing, body eating to melt into the chair as the air leaves his lungs.

"Come on," Tony said, standing up and slipping the gun into the waistband of his pants. Then offering his hand. "This place is safe. Theres a bed you can sleep in."

"I shouldn't sleep with a concussion," Peter said weakly, taking Tony's offered hand anyway.

"Its mild, I'm sure you'll be fine," Tony mused, heading deeper into the cabin to the bedroom.

The bedroom isn't anything special. A twin bed in the corner, a four drawer dresser and a blackout curtain.

Peter climbs onto the bed, not bothering with the covers or taking his shoes off. Tony thinks its best he sleep with them on anyway, in case Bucky finds them.

Tony moves to leave, grabbing the handle, and Peter bolts upright again, eyes wide.

"You're okay," Tony promises. "I'll be right outside."

Peter gives the barest shake of his head. "Stay here, please," he says softly.

Tony nods, shutting the door and turning off the light before making his way to the side of the bed. Theres an old step stool there, and he sits down at the head of the bed.

Peter lays back down, body too tense to ever fall asleep. Tony keeps his ears attuned to any noise that could alert him to Bucky, or anyone else, gun sitting perfectly stop on his knee, finger off the trigger, but ready at a moments notice.

"Tony?"

"Yes, Peter."

Peter shuffles around, and Tony turns his head just in time to feel pillow soft lips connect with the corner of his mouth.

He can't help but smirk as Peter settles back down. "Thanks for not killing me."

Tony chuckles at that, leaning his head against the wall. "I may be a hitman, but I've got morals," he says into the dark room. "Besides, nobody likes cancer."

Peter laughs tiredly at that before reaching his hand out and grabbing Tony's. Their fingers interlock, and Tony doesn't really know which one of them initiated it.

"You're going to be okay," Tony continued. "I wont let anyone hurt you. You're safe with me."

"I know."

#marvel #tony stark #peter parker #ironman #starker #spiderman #my writing #ao3 #sfsummerbingo21

[huenjin]

hold me down.

pairing – kim seungmin x reader | secretary!au

word count – 1634 words

ratings – 18+

genre – smut, includes grinding, creampie, slight overstimulation and dumbification (because i love it?), daddy kink, impregnation kink, size kink, bulge kink, office sex

"What are you doing, Y/N?" Seungmin's fingers tighten on the fake gold plated pen in his grip. "We're still in office."

"Yeah and," You push Seungmin back. The pen drops from his hand, falling onto the glass table and making a loud sound. His head falls against the soft rexine covered sofa in your office room. Your secretary, also your doting husband, groans as you climb on top of him, your leg swinging by the side as you sit on him, wrapping your arms around his neck. Your pencil skirt rides up and Seungmin's eyes trail your legs. "I run the company and it's already late so–" You drag your index finger over his shirt covered broad chest.

"Baby," Seungmin stresses. He tilts his face to look up at the surveillance cameras in the room. "Cameras and I have to finish going through these paper by today so that my boss," he raises an eyebrow at you, "–doesn't think I'm slacking just because I'm married to her."

"Well, your boss thinks you'd be doing your work even better if you just really listened to what she needed right now."

With a flick of your fingers hooking under his shirt, you tug open his shirt, a single button popping off the material as a result and Seungmin smiles. You press your lips against his chest, and mumble, "So please, Daddy. Do me, else I'll cut your pay."

"What a bad employer," he clicks his tongue. How was Seungmin expected to work in such a situation when his beautiful wife is on top of him, asking of him to have you in your very office. Something about it seemed so scandalous to him that it excites him way more than it should normally have.

"Don't care." You grind on his growing cock, your arms tightening over his neck. Seungmin holds your hips down onto him, helping you rub against him. You moan, voice airy as you inform him, "I got off once in the washroom at the sight of you rolling your sleeves and carrying those boxes into my office."

"You did what now, beautiful?" Seungmin stills your body, holding you fixed on his bulged length that stands through his pants. His eyes darkens and he feels you whimper in his hold. Seungmin has always found this reversal of roles enticing. The fact that you are this powerful CEO of one of the largest cosmetic companies in the country and that you are this dominating woman on the streets, conquering the market one by one and yet here you are – small in his hold and all his to have.

It is how he seems to cover your entire being. You pride yourself in being an average height for a woman but with Seungmin by your side, you seemingly become small by his side. Seungmin has to look down to talk to you, to keep a conversation.

"I couldn't help, daddy," you gasp, trying to move against him in hopes but your husband's large hands hold on to you, strongly. Seungmin's hand trails up your inner leg, fingers hasty to push your panties to the side. His fingers graze your wet lips, dragging residues or your last orgasm and your present arousal all over.

You're so small that it's fucking hot to Seungmin.

He can't help but fantasise about you. All these years, a ring to seal the deal and still he can't stop lusting after his wife. Of how short you are compared to him. Of how Seungmin can easily tower over you, as you look up at him with those innocent doe eyes of yours in the bed definitely turns him on. Of how a person of your size can command an entire room at the very same time. Of how he can hold onto your whole breast with those large hands of his as you moan and mewl on top of him as you are bouncing on his cock, begging for more. All while he uses you for a cocksleeve as he hoists you up and down just by using his bare hands to lift you.

Seungmin wants to do the same right now – to fuck your tiny being and to breed you.

"Baby, you're slopping wet." Your hand grips on the open ends of his shirt, trying to chase after his fingers. Seungmin kisses the side of your lips. "Should I just fuck you raw and stupid? Teach my baby girl to let her daddy work in peace?"

"Please do, daddy. Please. Fuck me stupid. Fuck me dumb."

Your fingers hastily move down to unbuckle his pants. You stand up slightly for Seungmin to pull himself up for you to pull his pants down, along with his boxers; his cock springs out, hot and angry, vein throbbing on the underside. You hold it in your hand, pumping it slowly. Positioning it, you lift your hips to angle it as Seungmin pushes your panties to the side and slowly, you drop your body to allow his cock to push into you.

"Fuck, daddy, you're so big," you groan, barely being able to let words out with the feeling of being stretched out by his cock. Seungmin doesn't let you adjust today. His large hands hold your acetabulum as he pulls you up only to bring you down, his hips thrusting into you. He plunges into you and you gush all over his cock, coating almost all of his length with your arousal. Seungmin is barely in but he is already hitting your spot, hot tip brushing against it vicariously that your hand moves up to hold your breast, softly hitting it over your clothing.

Seungmin thrusts into you again and his hand moves glides against your skin to press against your belly. He laughs, huskily and airy as he watches you squeeze his length. "Feel that, baby? Do you like feeling so fucking full and stretched out around my cock stuffed into you? What a pretty slut to call mine."

Seungmin's hands moved upwards to grab your clothes breasts, kneading it in his grip as he lets go of your hips. You bounce on his cock and Seungmin stares in fascination at how your breasts do the same, even in captive, both by your bra and his hands.

Your arms wrap around his neck once again as your walls squeeze around his cock, bouncing at a rapid pace to meet your end. Moans and loud unperiodic screams leave your lips as his cock stretches you out. You whimper in his hold, already sensitive from your last self-inflicted orgasm.

Seungmin holds your hips again as soon as he knows you're close. Kissing your neck and biting into the skin to make you his, not that the platinum ring on your fingers were a sign enough of branding, Seungmin whispers by your ear, "Going to fuck and cum in you. Going to breed you and have you stuffed with my cum like the little slut you are. Daddy is going to have you so full of my cum that you're bound to get pregnant. I'll do that, baby. You're going to keep it all inside of you."

"What it it slips out?" You gasp out, getting turned on by the thought of having Seungmin's kids.

"Going to fuck it into you over and over again," Seungmin grunts.

He thrusts into you rapidly, hips hitting into you over and over again, squeezing him as you edge closer and closer. "I'm going to cum, oh my god. Daddy, I'm going to cum." His fingers brushes against your clit and you know at that minute that you have come undone.

"No," he says, firmly, as he fucks into you ruthlessly. "Hold it. You're cumming with me."

"I can't, let meㅡ" You cry but Seungmin squeezes your harder harder, warning you. "Daddy! Fuck, please!" Seungmin's cock is repeatedly hitting your spot, your vision blurry in pleasure and you feel like you are going to explode.

"I'm close too." Seunhmin finally says and he thirst upwards faster, sounds resonating in the office room of yours and you don't care if people were to walk in and watch their boss fuck her husband in her office. Fuck, you think that would be hot, in fact.

"Fuck!" He exclaims. "Going to fucking cum inside you. Going to stuff you with my cum till your tiny little belly bulges with all that cum." Seungmin kisses you. It's messy, teeth clashing and desperate for some intimate contact as you soon tug at his lower lip with your teeth before letting go of it.

You scream your husband's name out loud – pretty sure for voices to have reached the corridor. Your orgasm coats his dick that still thrusts into you, staining his pants and your dress.

"Oh, god," you breathe in for air heavily. "Fuck," you whimper, body shaking almost violently, the muscles of your stomach contracting. Seungmin does not stop as he continues to ravage your pussy.

"Stop." You gasp, holding onto his shoulder, nails digging into it. Seungmin doesn't listen and continues to fuck you through your orgasm. "Stop, please! Ah! Daddy! Daddy! Daddy! Fuck, fuck!" One thrust at an angle and Seungmin releases into you, a small orgasm ripping out from your body simultaneously at the minor overstimulation that takes over your body completely.

You weakly pull yourself up from his cock, pussy clenching at nothing once he is completely out, releasing the mixture of both yours and his orgasm. It slides down your thigh and Seungmin's eyes stares at it before he holds your hips.

In one fluid motion, he pins you down on the sofa, your head against a cushion. Kissing you, he mumbles, "Told you to keep it in. Have to fuck it all back in now."

#seungmin smut #stray kids smut #skz smut #seungmin x reader #writings.rue #drabbles.rue #smut drabbles.rue #seungmin #stray kids #skz

[jinxthequeergirl]

Dream Come True

Steve harrington x Hopper! Reader (coraline AU)

Summary: escaping your everyday life after you move to live with your father couldn't have been something you wanted more, luckily for you you are given the chance

Warning: swearing, Horror themes like idk It's Coraline i think that speaks for itself no?

So i don't know if im going to end up making this a series or not but hey if this does really well then I might, but just this is so long so i might have to.

~~~~~

In front of you sat a small box with many opportunities, two small glossy black buttons, thread and the promise of freedom...

You watched the rain drops race down the window intently as your father drove you home from the headwear store. you'd only been In Hawkins for only half a month, having to move there with your father after your mom died. And you had only spent the time unpacking, today you had finally convinced your dad to take you to get supplies so you could really make your new rooms more like you.

The car bounced slightly causing your head to lift and hit the window. "Ow!"

"Sorry pot hole..." Hopper said glancing over to you. "You alright?"

"Yea...but guess it takes a while to figure out if you have brain damage or not.." You muttered sitting straight in the car seat, crossing your arms over your chest.

"C'mon don't be that way...you get to redecorate your room..that must be exciting for you? Give you something to do while we wait for the rain to clear up. "I guess..." You perked up at a new idea popping into your head.

"Maybe I can start a garden in the front too? Make it look pretty? I have a garden box so we wouldn't need anything, el can help me too!?" You said almost as a question seeing if he would go along with the idea.

"Sure... Sounds good, just wait till the rain clears up so you aren't bringing mud in." You frowned lightly, ut had been raining for the past three days without any sign of stopping soon. "Yea...sure."

The car came to a slow stop infront of the house. "I'll help you get this stuff inside and make you lunch but I've got to go back to work." You nodded as you got out of the car.

You'd begun by rearanging the few things of furniture in the room,while hopper set to work at making you a lunch. You starting with the dresser dragging it across the room to set it in its new place.

You dusted off your hands and turned your attention to look at the new space you made, stopping once it was caught by something on the wall where the dresser once was.

"Hello..." You slid across the floor and dragged your fingers across the outline of a small door in the wall.

"Hey Dad!?" You yelled getting up to look for him. "Whats up?"

"What this?" You asked now running your finger over the key hole. "Do you have the key!?" You asked hopefully turing to look up at him in the dokr way. He shook his head and shrugged. "I...maybe? I'm not sure...if i did it's probably boared up! They're would be no point."

You rolled your eyes. "Now Food in on the counter your sister is with Mike so make sure to call in about an hour to check on her-"

"Can you please look for a key?" You cut in. He sighed pinching the bridge of his nose. "I can, but I'm late so just finish unpacking and setting up and I'll look for it when I come back." You huffed but nodded and started to finish setting up your room.

After about an hour and a half you'd finished painting, unpacking and decorating your room, you had finished. Even had lunch and called El just like hopper had asked. Now you simpily sat in your room staring at the photo of your previous bestfriends that sat on the bedside table.

Back in New York with your mom you never had to worry about being bored, all your friends where their and there where places to go. Hawkins was diffrent, granted you where still adjusting but that didn't make it any less difficult.

The phone rang snapping you of of your thoughts. You hustled across the house to puck it up. "Hello?"

"Y/n! Thank god you picked up! Just the girl I was looking for!"

"Hey Robin,whats up?"

"Not much, I was just wondering since the rains cleared up would you be intrested in taking a tour of Hawkins with me and Steve?"

You thought about it for a moment, The first day you'd mobed here and met everyone they where the two you'd hit it off with, well You did with Robin anyways so you didn't see why you couldn't get out.

"Yea...I'd love to!"

"Cool! We'll be there in a few."

"So what does one do around here?" You asked following beside Robin And Steve down the sidewalk. "Well there's the arcade... " steve started but quickly trailed off. "There are some shops around town." Robin added.

"Is there like, i dunno a mall maybe? A movie theater at least?"

"Movie theater yes, mall not so much."

"It a...it burned down." Steve informed. "Oh...wow..." You followed them through town, going in and out of every store that was open.

"So Steve...." You attempted to start while looking through a clothing Rack in a thrift store.

"Got a girlfriend?"

"Uh no..no ya know I'm kinda just testing the waters...seeing if theres anyone worth dating around here."

"And?" You asked not looking up at him, you could clearly tell he was trying to act cool around you.

"And?" He repeated your question.

"Is there?...anyone worth dating around here?"

"Nah none that are really my type." He said nonchalantly fixing his hair in the mirror across from him. "Wow...are you always this increadibly douchie? Or are you like this just for me?" You asked leaning on clothing rack to look at him better.

"What I'm not...I'm not being-"

"You kinda where Harrington." Robin said from across the store earing a chuckle from you. His face flushed and he pretened to look at a jacket that seemingly caught his attention. "Ah don't be that way stevie...it's sooo charming, I'm practically swooning for you." You said sarcastically. "Shut up!"

The sun was hanging low through the trees casting that late afternoon orange glow upon the three of you as you walked back home.

"This place is...pretty boring...how do you guys manage?"

"Hawkins isn't all bad...besides It's a lot more exciting than you would think." Robin said while offering you some of her candy. "You just gotta...know where to look."

"Sometimes the intresting things find you." Steve said stopping once your house came into view. "If you say so...thanks for showing me around."

"No problem, maybe we can hang out again soon." She offered as you started to continue forward. "Yea! That would be great!" They both waved to you as you stepped into the house shutting the door.

You placed a few of the nick nacks you'd bought onto the top of your dresser for decoration, glancing at something that wasn't there before. A glossy black key.

You plucked it from its spot on the dresser and turned to the small door quickly slidding across the floor once again to get to the door. You hestitantly dragged the key across the outline of the door ripping the wall paper open before slipping the key inside.

It slid in perfectly, giving you some sort of relife as it clicked open, you pulled it open being met with nithing but brick.

"Damn..." You huffed and shut the door and placed the key back ontop of the dresser.

Something yanked you from your sleep suddenly and you lied awake, a sliver of silver moonlight hitting your face through the curtains as you did so.

It was quiet as you lied there except for an ever so faint sound of humming that you just barrely missed. You stayed still fir a second trying to pin point the sound, it continued for a while as you did so softly floating through the air from an unknown source, you finally gave in and tossed the covers off and stood up from your bed moving around the room to find it stopping when your foot hit something on the ground.

"What the hell!?" Jumping back slightly at the contact you looked down seeing a long greyish green vine across your bedroom floor. "What the hell..." You repeared examining it closer you followed it with your gaze seeing it came from the small opening of the little door a slight glow came from it along with little white particals that floated up into the air around it.

You moved carefully over to it kneeling next to it careful to avoide the vine protruding from it, as you did you could hear the humming closer now. You pulled the door open getting a blast of air blown back into your face along with a bright glow. You gasped slightly watching a tunnle appear almost instantly infront of you.

The humming slightly louder now. With out a second thought you climbed through, eventually met with another door which you easily pushed open and found yourself crawling through only to see you'd cralwed back into your bedroom. "Huh?" The humming was louder, unmistakable too, you knew that song. You looked at your bedroom door seeing the light from the living room shining in.

"Dad!?" You stood up and exited the room being greeted by the smell of food cooking. "Dad? What are you do-" you stopped a few feet from the counter seeing him move around the kitchen

"Hey sweet pea! You're just in time for dinner!" You gulped thickly when he turned to face you. "Oh god...I must be mistaken...you aren't my dad...my dad-" it was him but, diffrent. He seemed plaer yet more lively.

"Doesn't cook?" He asked guesturing to the freshly cooked meal. You couldn't help but stumble back a little bit as he approached you with a light hearted laugh. "Well thats because I'm your other father dear! Well better father"

"Other...Father?...wha-"

"Why don't you get your mom and Tell her dinner is ready!"

"Mom?

"Well your Mother of course silly! I actually think she's in the garden out front." He pushed you forward lightly and you glanced back cautiously before going to the front door.

You opened the door and stepped outside being greeted by a beautifully bright garden. "Holy sh-"

"Watch your mouth young lady!" You jumped turning tonthe voice and and gulping.

"Oh my god....mom!?" You stopped and covered your mouth feeling tears briming in your eyes.

"Hello sweet pea!" She opened her arms and you instantly ran to her and hugged her. You could tell just like with your father she was diffrent but couldn't exactly tell whatbwas diffrent.

"You...your alive!"

"Well of course I am! Oh come look at this!"

She pulled away taking your hand and pulling you down the steps of the pourch into the flower filled front yard.

She held your shoulders as you watched the flowers practically bloom before you. "I planted them just this afternoon! Our faviorte!" It was true the flowers before you where always both you and your mothers faviorte.

"They're beautiful mom! Oh!" You turned to her with a smile. "Dad said dinner was ready and sent me to get you."

"Oh! We don't wanna keep him waiting!" She said giggling with you and guiding you back to the house.

"There they are!" Hopper yelled setting the last of the food on the table. "Thirsty?" Your mom asked as you sat down. "Mmm you know I could go for a purple cow!"

"Coming right up!" She knocked on the table lightly the lights above lowered themselves offering you said drink, along with extra grape soda and vanilla icecream just incase.

"Wow thank you!" You said taking the drink and extras. Hopper placed a plate infront of you. "Here comes the Gravey train choochoo!" You mom said earning a laugh from both you and your dad.

A toy train in fact made its way across the table stopping infront of you to dump gravey on your plate.

"Mmh! This is so good!" Youbsaid stuffing your mouth full of food. "More?" Hopper asked.

"No thank you I'm stuffed." You said leaning back and taking a last sip of your icecream float.

Hopper took the plate from you and your mother placed a cake before you that read 'Welcome home'

"Home?"

"We've been expecting you for a while!" Hopper said.

"Wow...uh..really?"

"Of course! You beling here! With your family!"

You smiled lightly.

"Thanks...but It's late...I should go to bed.."

"Oh of course!" You stood up and they both followed you to your bedroom. You crawled into bed and they took turns kissing your forhead and wishing you a goodnight. You slowly drifted off to sleep peacefully.

"It was so weird!" You said throwing a rock into the water infront of you.

"Well it was just a dream, nothing to freak about." Robin shrugged.

"Yea I mean your mom was there it couldn't have been real..."

You and robin both glared at Steve. "I...well thats not what I meant..." He gulped slinging his own rock into the water.

"He's right though." You said softly. "But it just...it felt so real! The food the...feeling! But I woke up and the door was all bricked up again..."

"That's just further proof it was only a dream." Robin said as you sat beside her.

"Yea..." It was already late afternoon and you had decided to stay out until the sun had set well into night.

Steve had dropped robin off at her house and so you sat alone with him in his car as he took you home.

"Sorry about what i said...about your mom..."

He said finally. "No...it's ok...like i said you where right...it's just a dream..." He frowned slightly, you could tell he was beating himself up about it.

In all honestly you hadn't gotten off on the best of feet with him but it's wasn't so awful to be around him, he just had a hard time telling when to open his mouth and when to keep it shut. But you liked him.

"Well here we are." He said pulling up to the house. "Thank." You said with a smile before getting out and going inside.

"Hey kid!" Hopper said happily as you stepped inside.

"Hey!" You smiled. "Oh hey, sorry I never got around to finding that key for you."

"Thats ok I found it"

El stood in the door way with a concerned look. "What are you-" you hurried to your room and pulled the key out and showed him.

"You where right though...there was nothing there." You shrugged going back to your room.

"Bad place." You jumped at El's voice behind you. "What?"

"Don't keep going there it's a bad place..." She said quietly. "What bad place?"

"El! Its Mike's on the phone!" El quickly left to take the phone.

"Bad place?..."

#steve harrington x reader #stranger things x reader

[creekqueen27]

Fate (Raphael x Reader)

Requested: can you do one with Raphael, she gets kidnapped and they get Raph's dna and make her pregnant, he's actually happy about it cause he already loved her, how he acts around her being pregnant. Maybe some protective or possessive Raphael with some smutt?Thx!! <3

Gotcha boo thang 💋

Requests are open.

____________________

The bright lights made it hard for you to open your eyes. You tried to move your arms, only to realize you were restrained. Memories of what happened the night before come rushing back; the break in, the fighting, the capturing of yourself and the turtles. This really looks like the end. You turn your head and see what you assume is a doctor. You swallow thickly, trying to move your legs only to realize.. they're in stirrups?! "What the fuck.." you say, gaining the attention of the doctor. He looks up from the laptop and meets your eyes. "What are you doing to me?!?" You scream. He chuckles.

"Oh, you've been unconscious for the entire procedure, miss. You're an amazing surrogate. The healthiest eggs I've ever seen, really." Is that supposed to be a compliment? "I'm really excited for the outcome of the experiment. I'm sure you're concerned, but you shouldn't be. I'm very confident that it will be just a normal pregnancy, a normal delivery. Then, if we don't get the desired outcome, we can try again." The smile never leaves his face. Your stomach suddenly feels sick.

"Pregnancy?!" You shout. "I'm pregnant?! How?!" Your head is spinning.

"One of your eggs were fertilized with the DNA sample we acquired from your friend, Raphael. We believe the outcome should greatly benefit our company, the physical talents of you both combined-" You tuned him out, you felt like your heart stopped. You couldn't breathe. There goes your chance with him..

"I'm pregnant with Raph's baby.." you lay you're head back as you feel tears filling your eyes. Are we ever getting out of here? The thought ran through your mind for the next few days until finally, at dusk, you heard glass breaking and an alarm going off. As you heard people getting beat up closer to where you were being kept, you felt hopeful.

"She's in there!!" April's voice called out. She must have gotten help. You feel like you're going to cry when she busts through the door and starts undoing your wrists. You immediately hug her, tears escaping your eyes as you sob. "Are you okay?! What'd they do to you.." she trails off, glancing at the screens around you.

"Come on!" Leo screams as you see the turtles knocking people down left and right. You stand up, grabbing the folder next to the chair you were strapped to, and ran as fast as you could while holding April's hand. Casey was holding a door for everyone while he urged everyone to hurry. The fresh air hits your face as you all make it outside and run towards the "lady killer" as Mikey calls it. You hold tight to the folder as you hop in the back with April, Donatello in the passenger seat, Leo driving, Mikey, Raphael and Casey in the back pushing buttons to get defenses up again the enemy. Once you're all in the clear, you can't help but stare at Raph. April nudges you, leaning in.

"Are you okay?" She asks. You immediately feel tears falling down your face. "It's okay, you're okay. We're all here, you're okay." She soothes, Mikey coming closer and offering reassurance as well. You shake your head.

"I'm pregnant." You choke out as you hand the folder to April.

"Pregnant?!" Mikey screams and looks at your belly. He's pulled back by Raphael harshly, who has a pained look on his face.

"Raph.." April says lowly, looking between the two of you.. "he needs to read this.." she says, looking to you. You nod your head and lean against her after she hands the folder to Raph. You stare at him as he reads. He suddenly looks up at you. His eyes go to your belly. Back up to your eyes. He doesn't look disgusted?

"Are you hurting?" He asks. You shake your head. "Are you sure this is real?" He asks, leaning towards you a bit. You nod your head. "Yer pregnant.. with.." he whispers, looking at your belly. "Your baby." You finish for him, meeting eyes.

A few weeks later.. about 8 to be exact..

The lair was finally cleaned up and restored, which is good because the morning sickness hit you hard. You just lay and rested on the couch with a bucket, miserable. Mikey tried to cheer you up, but it didn't work. You just wanted this to be over. "Here, try this." You look up at Donnie offering you a small vile of liquid. You weakly grasp it, drinking it down. It only takes a few seconds to notice a great difference.

"Oh my God, Donnie.. thank you." You say quietly. You sit up, popping your back before standing and pulling down your pj shorts. Donnie gently leads you to the table where Mikey just sat down fresh pizza. As soon as you sit, you're pulled up again. You look up and meet eyes with Raphael, giving him a confused look. He places a pillow in your seat before sitting you back down. You can't help but smile. He's actually been really sweet towards you since..

"Yessss, gimme that sweet cheesey goodness!" Mikey says while digging in the pizza box. He passes the box around while Leo sits down, grabbing a slice. When you finish your second slice, you make a move to stand but Raph quickly puts his hand on your shoulder, holding you in place.

"Ya need'a eat more." He states, grabbing another slice and sitting it in front of you. You look from the slice, back up to him.

"I'm full." You simply say, earning a look from Raph.

"Baby aint." He says. You roll your eyes at him. "Just eat the damn pizza." He sighs. You also sigh, eating the slice. Maybe you weren't as full as you thought. "Don, you finish the thing so we can see the baby yet?" Raph asks, leaning back in his seat. The nerdy turtle swallows quickly, and smiles.

"In fact, I have. And I don't mean to brag, but I believe it's much more accurate than what you would get in a doctor's office." Donnie smiles. You're still getting prenatal care from an actual baby doctor, but extra care never hurts.

"Can I see the baby today?" You ask, getting nervous but excited as well. Donnie nods, mumbling an 'of course' as Mikey bounces in his seat.

"Dude, let me see the baby too!" Mikey shouts. You giggle at him.

"You can see, Mikey."

"After me." Raphael states harshly. You look up to him, raising a brow at his tone. He looks at you out of the corner of his eye. He chews his toothpick as he follows you to Donnie's lab, Mikey still sitting and finishing off the pizza with Leo. You lay on a long desk with a pillow behind your head as Donnie fools with the machine. Raphael towers over you, staring down at your belly before taking a seat, making him a bit above eye level with you. As the machine turns on, Donnie grabs a jelly like substance and raises your shirt. You don't miss Raph clenching his jaw.

"Okay, let's see.. female organs.." Donnie mumbles to himself as he rubs the jelly around your belly and presses a wand like thing to your lower belly. "AHA!" He shouts as an image pops up on the screen. Not entirely black and white. Not fuzzy, but clear.. "As if you're actually inside the womb, I knew it would be much more detailed." He says, proud of his invention. "Very strong heart rate. Seems developmentally on schedule. Aw, what a little shell." He coos, and you stare at the image. It really is Raph's baby.

"It's so small.." Raph says in awe, smiling at screen. Are his eyes watery?

"Actually, it's measurements are a bit bigger than most at this gestational age." Donnie says casually, getting different angles of the baby. "Most likely from the father." Donnie states playfully with a glance at Raph. You've never seen him smile so big before, immediately bringing a calming feeling over you as you smiled, too.

"Does it look healthy?" You asks, biting your lip. Donnie nods, double checking the heart rate.

Raph was always there when you got an ultrasound from Donnie. He always smiled looking at the baby on the screen. He was always helpful.. except for this exact moment. You're almost 5 months pregnant, finally have a noticeable bump.

"Move." You state, looking up at the red clad turtle blocking the door. He moved all your stuff, including yourself, into his bedroom weeks ago during the worst part of the morning sickness. He would always follow you to the bathroom, holding your hair for you. (He insists on sleeping on the mattress in the floor while you take his bed.) You've been procrastinating on getting stretchier pants for a week or so, and you were going to go out and buy some now but..

"Ya aint leaving. It's not safe for you, yer vulnerable." Raph states, not even moving an inch while you're pushing him as hard as you can. "Ain't gonna getcha anywhere, shorty." You sigh.

"Raph, I need more pants. These aren't really fitting anymore!" You pout up at him. "I have to go get some! And more socks.." you say quietly as you remember.

"Call April, I'll pay 'er back for em." His rough voice is low as he looks down at you. You pout again, earning a smirk and eye roll from him.

"I need to get them myself, I can't have you buying everything for me-"

"Sure ya can, shorty." Raph cuts you off, wrapping an arm around your shoulders.

"You could just dress up and go with me.." you quietly suggest as he leads you into his gym, remembering when he went out in daylight in a disguise.

"Ya can just call April and stay ya ass here and stay safe." The irritation is clear in his voice. "Get some light cardio goin'." Raphael starts with his weights as you use the treadmill lightly, trying to stay healthy during this whole thing. You give into Raphael's 'suggestion' and ask April to get you some comfy maternity pants and clothes. She really is your best friend, and has stayed so supportive. When she arrives the next day your new wardrobe (she really went all out), you were so excited. Your favorite was a dark red sweater.

After having girl time with April, and another ultrasound (which included Raph) because she hadn't seen the baby yet, you and her made a plan. "I hope they go for it." You say as you walk into the busy living area where all four turtles were playing video games.

"I swear to God yer fuckin cheatin!" Raph growls at Mikey as he cowers away from his older brother.

"Dude I'm not, you just suck!" Mikey says, running behind April and picking her up as a shield. Your giggle catches Raph's attention, but you don't see it.

"So guys! Why don't we go to the farmhouse for a few days? Give this girl some time outside." April suggests while giving you a side hug. Mikey immediately agrees, followed by Donnie. Leo is indifferent, really. He could take it or leave it. Raph seems unsure.

"Please?" You beg, walking to where he now sits at the kitchen table. You're barely above his eye level with him sitting and you standing by his side.

"Dunno if it's gonna be safe." He states, drinking his orange crush. You sigh, putting your arms around his large shoulders.

"Pleeeeeease? Everyone's gonna be there, it'll be safe." You beg. He grunts in response. You squeeze him a bit, whispering a quiet 'please' while leaning your head against his. You hear a 'come on, Raph' from Donnie. You nuzzle him lightly while Mikey tells him to 'dude, it'll be fine'. Even April throws in a 'itll be fun'. You give a final pout as he caves.

"If ya really wanna go.." he says lowly. You smile so big and kiss his cheek, thanking him before you rush to go pack. You completely miss the blush on his face, but everyone else sees it.

"You really love her, dontcha dude?" Mikey asks casually, softly. Raph grunts and nods. "You can totally tell her." He suggests.

"Look at me, Mikey. I'm a freak. She's beautiful. And she's stuck havin' my kid. She never wanted that.. ain't gonna make it worse for her." Raph sighs through his nose before going to the gym to work through his negative feelings.

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