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burnedbyshoto · 4 years

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peeping tom(mina)

— Mina finds a peephole in her room that looks directly into your room and discovers a sight that slightly rocks her entire life.

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pairing: ashido mina x fem!reader

warning: 18+, smut, voyeur!mina, mutual masturbation, vibrator, dildos, finger fucking, cursing, peephole, lesbianism

word count: 2,815

a/n: sorry its a day late!!!! have some pervy roommate mina rn and some abo shiggy in about a few hours!!!!

kinktober day 11 main kink: voyeurism | kinktober masterlist

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Mina has a dirty secret.

And just thinking about it makes her shy, and she has never been a shy girl.

Since she could fully understand what sex was, she had always been someone who was incredibly sex-positive. Mina was also a full-body worshiper, someone who found everyone’s bodies hot and attractive. It never really surprised anyone when they found this out. She was always the type to point out how that person’s ass looked hot in jeans, or how that shirt made that person’s boobs look full, soft, and luscious. She held back at absolutely nothing, making sure to let everyone know her opinion on how and why she currently found them attractive.

So the ones she would eventually bring to bed were also unsurprised by the enthusiasm she held when she kissed down their bodies, fingers massaging every piece of skin and muscle as she moaned praises. To Mina, bodies were a temple, and when she was visiting, she was going to make sure you knew how fascinating she thought it to be.

Even now, at twenty-two, she never hated pointing out what she thought to be positive about people’s bodies. It was almost second nature.

“Can you please tell me why your legs look hot as fuck in those sweats?!” Mina practically screamed, dramatically fanning herself when you walked into the kitchen.

It was Saturday night, and Mina found herself in her apartment, blinds are drawn open, blankets were strewn around the living room, and hot homemade food sizzling on the stove. You were her roommate, and you’ve been her roommate for about seven months now. Both of you had met in a college class, being paired up multiple times for a few projects in the year had created an unlikely friendship that resulted in a roommate contract because you were moving to Tokyo after graduation, and hey! So was Mina!

You snorted by the stove, flipping the sweet crepes you had been making for the both of you in the pan. Turning your head to look at Mina, you playfully winked at her, posing your body in faux-seductive ways while you dipped your head back.

“What can I say, the sweats of a heartbroken ex always look hotter on a champions fat ass.”

Mina laughed loudly, her hands bringing her sweet rosé to her lips, taking a long, deep drink of the alcoholic beverage. “I can’t believe you keep your exes clothes! I burn all of mine,” Mina states as if the two of you hadn’t already had this conversation a thousand times.

“I don’t think you can talk!” you scoff, spatula in hand, flipping the light sweet into a roll. “You’re the one who goes and buys actual metals for every successive man you fuck! And you have sooo many metals!”

Also, something that had been repeated a million times, and yet never failed to get either one of you two in some laughing flush.

“I do have so many metals,” Mina sighs, the grin on her face bright and proud while you walk over, crepes in hand. Thanking you for the food, Mina waited for you to settle down next to her before resuming the movie the two of you had decided to watch. “I promise, y/n, if you just look a guy in the eye and tell him you like his shoulders and his thighs, you’ll get him in bed in a blink of an eye.”

You hum, taking a chug of the rosé straight from the bottle, releasing it with a small pop that made Mina’s eyes rest on your swollen, wet lips.

“Yeah, no. You see, I’m not really interested in that sort of stuff,” you admit, taking a bite from the crepe as the movie slowly becomes background noise.

“You haven’t dated anyone since high school,” Mina more than points out, tugging at the indeed high school logoed sweatpants. “That was like, four years ago, and you don’t sleep around?! What is it? You waiting for the Prince of some unknown country to come and wed you without you realizing he’s a prince? I mean, you can totally do that, especially with that hot bod of yours, but I know all the princes our age, none of them are even remotely hot!”

Mina watched as your eyes dropped to your food, the smile on your face small, maybe a bit... sad?

“It’s not that,” you shrugged, your eyes moving to lock on Mina. “Mina, I’m gay.”

What?

Processing Data…

Data Processed. Please Continue.

“WHAT?!”

A shit-eating grin spread on your face, and you nodded, taking another gulp of the rosé and shoving more crepe in your mouth.

“YOU’RE TELLING ME YOU ALLOWED ME TO HAVE HETEROSEXUAL SEX WITH YOU IN THE APARTMENT AND DIDN’T TELL ME?!” Mina shrieked, suddenly mortified with her actions as her fingers clenched her curly pink hair. “WHAT ABOUT ALL THOSE MEN I TRIED HOOKING YOU UP WITH?! I mean, I know you didn’t fuck any of them, which ended up all fine because I would have cried if Kiri, Denki, or Sero stopped showing up.”

“Mina!” you laughed.

“I can’t believe you allowed me to force men on you; I’m so sorry, sweetie!”

Mina froze when your warm fingers suddenly grabbed onto hers, pulling her cold palms near your chest as your slightly glazed with alcohol eyes took her in.

“Listen, Mina, I’ll say this once, and I’ll repeat this. I didn’t tell you because I don’t care to share my sexuality. Not only that but all those men you introduced me to almost made me wish I was straight! Almost, but they’re a bit too…” Mina watched you trail off, your hammering heart a gentle smooth on her fingers.

“Stupid?” Mina tried, and you laughed as you nodded.

“Yeah, stupid.”

Mina gulped, her head nodding while you finally let go of her hands and sighed.

“Don’t be weird about it, Pinky,” you muse, shoving your shoulder against her. “I won’t hit on ya.”

Mina scoffed, clearly offended, “I think you should, though, my body is hot, and my kisses are just as good.”

It was said in jest, and Mina’s heart fluttered at the way you laughed with her in good spirits. That was normal, right?

Eventually, the contents of the rosé disappeared between the two of you, the movie long done, and the crepes sitting warm and sweet in your stomachs. Mina smiled brightly as she waved at you a simple goodnight as she needed to reorganize her snacks cabinet. Hearing the small click of your room door, Mina slumped against the counter, a weird feeling in her brain at the sudden revelation from you.

It didn’t make you any different in her eyes, she wasn’t a bigot, but there was something different.

Something new.

The cabinet wasn’t fixed up at all, Mina’s attention span forbidding her from reorganizing the cabinet until she turned off the lights and dragged her feet back into her room, conveniently located directly next to yours.

The apartment layout was weird.

Instead of a typical hallway separating the two rooms, it was a single, thin wall.

Now, Mina would categorize herself as many things, but dramatic was never one of them. But the way she had slammed her door in an attempt to clear the muggy storm of her thoughts might have been dramatic of her. Maybe a bit too dramatic.

A loud tear came from the right side of her room, and Mina gasped loudly as the shelf showcasing her plethora of medals for all her sexual conquests tore the wall as it fell off. Stupid heavy bitch! Racing over to the wall, Mina frantically grabbed at the tearing cheap wallpaper, her eyes wide with worry as she tried to fix the shelf to no avail.

“M-Mina, are you okay?” a gasped breath came from the direct another side of the wall.

“It’s all good!” Mina laughed loudly, her heart pounding because she was going to confess what was going on the second you asked again, as you usually do. But the only thing that followed was the roaring of her blood and heart as she stared at the wall.

Weird.

Mina didn’t dwell on it for too long, her hands throwing the medals off the shelf and onto the bed as she picked at the wall. Oh no, oh no, oh no.

She grazed the center of the wall and watched in horror as the wall crumbled at the touch, and she bit her tongue to keep from hysterically sobbing as a hole opened up from your room to hers. All things considered, it wasn’t a big hole, no bigger than the diameter of her pinky, but it was still a hole in the wall.

Despite the crack in the wall, Mina swore or prayed that it wasn’t as bad as it seemed. Pressing to the hole, she peered in and froze immediately.

There weren’t many things in the world that made Mina freeze, but this was one of them. Her eye pressed to the wall saw that you were on the bed. Your sweats dropped around your ankles, shirt bunched above your breasts so that your fingers twisted and pulled at your nipples. The other hand held a vibrator to your clit.

Your face was scrunched up, the low hum of the vibrator suddenly piercing through the small crack in the wall, alerting Mina of a straight fire that erupted between her thighs as she watched you fuck yourself. The arch of your back when you come off the mattress makes her thighs rub together, and how your lips part in what she knows to be the most delicious moan, she’s ever managed to hear.

Mina isn’t sure when you stop masturbating that night, or even more importantly: when her panties became as fucking wet as they are.

She manages to put the shelf back onto the wall, her face absolutely red as she turns off the lights, ashamed to even go to the bathroom despite the discomfort of the slick between her folds. She dreams of having your mouth between her legs that night.

It doesn’t stop there, Mina’s ashamed to admit.

As a matter of fact, she’s probably obsessed.

She definitely didn’t keep her ear to the wall, desperately waiting to hear the low hum of the vibrator through the wall. She definitely didn’t pull the still broken shelf from the wall to peer through that crack to watch as you fucked yourself. She definitely does not, and she means, does not rub her fingers against her clit as she watches you.

But what was she currently doing when she heard the all too familiar consistent humming of one of your plenty of vibrators? She was stumbling off her bed, throwing the shelf off the wall, and using the crack in the wall to stare into your room. Except as she now unashamedly moved her fingers into her swats, fingertips grazing her already humming clit, she froze at the new sight she saw.

Typically, when you masturbated, you would lay along your bed. Your body laid out flat from the side for Mina to see. She never actually saw the slick of your cunt, or the way your pretty cunt would look like as you fucked yourself against a dildo. But today? Oh god, today was different.

You were propped up against the wall, your legs pressed open for Mina to see in all your glory. Your slicked, pretty pussy revealed for her eyes, and your head leaning against the wall as she watched.

Mina moaned as her fingers began to rub her clit, the already fluttering, simmering sensation radiating from her bundle of nerves too tight, too demanding to ignore. She circled her clit as your fingers dipped into your core, and she bit her lower lip at the refined look of elation that wiped over your face.

Your fingers moved in and out of your cunt, and Mina was hooked on the very exact angle your fingers were going in. Her mind wandering as she imagined that it was her in there with you. That it was her holding her fingers to your cunt, and not just fantasizes that drove her insane. Mina gasped as suddenly the dormant warmth in her legs sparked into a growing fire that made her legs shake and had her resting her forehead upon the wall.

Her eyes struggled to open when your feet kicked up off the mattress, toes curled to the balls of your feet as you keened loudly. A whimper left her lips at the way you moaned, the soft, beautiful sounds making Mina sink an impatient hand in her core.

She fucked herself, her eyes fluttering, lips gasping for air as she pressing her warm fingers against her even warmer walls. Mina gasped your name, her eyes trying to focus on that wall, and was absolutely frozen at the sight she saw next.

You were holding a double ended dildo to your cunt, fucking your sopping wet cunt that Mina swore she could hear from her room. The vibrator was still on your clit, and Mina snapped her hips further, stronger into her scissoring fingers. It felt like you were teasing her with the toy as if you knew she was watching in and were teasing and testing her limits. Mina could feel herself shoving that dildo as far up her cunt as she could get it, her hands holding on to your beautiful thighs and bringing you in so that your slick cunts could grind against each other, fuck each other properly. If her brain wasn’t so muddled, she wouldn’t be thinking you were looking at her right now through the peephole, and she wouldn’t be thinking about the million different ways she’d fuck you given the opportunity. She wondered if you had a strap. Would you wear it if her fantasies were to ever come true? Would she?

Mina couldn’t dwell on the secrets she wished to know because suddenly, you let out one of the loudest, most lewd moans Mina had ever heard emitted from your swollen lips. The slick of her heat and the wet of her essence easily letting her fingers glide about her clenching walls with practiced, well-known ease. You gasped, your eyes fluttering to the back of your head as your hand holding the dildo became more frantic, sloppier, before stopping altogether, and although you had reached an orgasm — Mina swore she saw god.

Your orgasmic euphoric face was unlike anything Mina had ever seen.

The flustered, quiet pleasure reeking from every small line in your face, the way your mouth dropped just enough so that your pink tongue was on full display, the way you fought between biting down on your lip or letting yourself moan in your high. But it was the way your eyes crossed that sent Mina’s forehead slamming against her fist on the wall, muting the way Mina felt her walls clench wildly and tightly around her curled, lithe fingers.

She breathed in her descent, her cheeks burning with the same and bliss she always felt after orgasming. It wasn’t fair she came so soon watching you fuck yourself, especially as she knew she typically took so long in bed with men to make cum.

“Do you want to try it out?” your voice slipped into the room, and Mina froze, her blood suddenly turning ice cold. Her eyes snapped back to the dirty peephole to see that you were, in fact, staring into the hole, hand sliding the dildo into your cunt still, still willing and ready to go more round. “It gets a little lonely putting on a show for you night after night, Mina, and for you to never come and collect your prize.”

Mina swallowed, her eyes blinking owlishly at the way you shifted forward, turning so that your ass was in the air, knees, and chest on the mattress.

You knew.

“Come and collect your prize, please.”

“Y-Yes!”

Mina learned two things that night.

One: she especially and equally enjoyed having listless amounts of body worship mantra on her skin. The feeling of wet lips and hot breathes with things she was so used to giving made her cum around your pretty little fingers much more than she’d ever thought possible.

Two: you had known after the first night that she had caught you masturbating. Apparently, Mina was much louder than she thought herself to be, and when whining your name — she doesn’t remember even speaking — you had known and did all you could to finally getting your impulsive roommate to fuck you.

Oh, and I guess there is one more thing too!

Three: Mina had the absolute hots for you and was going to take you out for a proper date, tomorrow.

#mina x reader #mina smut #bnha #bnha x reader #mha #bbs kinktober 2020

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100hearteyes · 3 years

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Part 2 of Clarke And Lexa Make a Porno, because why the fuck not.

Part 1.

"No. Absolutely not."

Anya's wolfish grin is no good omen. Lexa feels a sense of dread wash over her and tries in vain to assuage her nerves by holding her friend's gaze. Anya wouldn't look this sure if she didn't have some card up her sleeve.

Lexa throws a furtive glance around, checks that her co-workers are still focused on the German porn telenovela. It's only when she's sure that the action on-screen will keep them rooted for a while that she turns back to Anya, trying but failing to meet her eyes.

She overcompensates with another glance around the room and a low hiss. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but am I not too," she licks her lips, gathering the courage, "'vanilla' to do it?"

Anya shrugs like it's a no-brainer; crosses her arms and props her booted feet on Lexa's desk. "That's exactly the point. You're a lesbian Disney princess. Pretty sure if you started singing the whole fucking fauna of Capitola would follow you around."

Lexa levels Anya with a glare and tries to push her feet off the desk, to no avail.

(Seriously, what's it worth being editor if she can't even have her subjects' respect? She wishes this job was less about the headaches and more about the self-indulgent moments of microscopic tyranny.)

The feet might not budge, but Anya will. Lexa is sure of it. She draws herself taller and tucks on her most authoritative scowl. "I won't do it."

Anya plucks an imaginary cigarette from her mouth and throws it away without a care in the world. She reaches behind her and drags forth a heavy wooden box, filled to the brim with—

"My vinyls."

Lexa is in a daze.

She thought she'd lost all her vinyls to time and moving. She mourned each one of them for at least a year, cried many a night away clutching her record player to dear life, lamenting their shared loss.

They had a real connection.

But it turns out her vinyls weren't lost after all, and her tears were for naught. They were safe all along, albeit in different hands, and she'd known nothing of it, like a mother who lets her children wander about without aim nor authority.

How can she ever have kids if she can't even take care of her prized vinyls?

Lexa feels a prick of self-righteous indignation at the betrayal and puffs out her chest. "Why do you have all my vinyls?"

"I think you mean all my vinyls," Anya corrects with a lazy flurry of one hand towards the box.

"You don't even own a record player."

"How the fuck would you know?"

Lexa raises an eyebrow at her friend. "I come over all the time?"

"I could hide it while you're there."

"And then you'd never find it again, because that's what happens every time you try to hide something from me."

Anya shrugs and watches as Lexa picks one of the vinyls and turns it over in her hands, reading the track list on the back with the reverence one would a millennium-old parchment. Then she looks up at Anya with a stern glare.

"Over half of these were stolen from my house."

Anya shrugs again with infuriating nonchalance and Lexa wishes she had a pencil nearby just so she could snap it in two with one hand. Or stab one of Anya's eyes with it.

"Maybe I just rescued them from the actual malefactor," drawls Anya.

"We both know the real culprit sits across from me and has been wearing the same socks for the past three weeks."

Nailed it.

When she looks at her friend, however, all she sees is that same old resting bitch face that never seems to go away.

"Wow, Lexa," Anya deadpans. "Now you've really hurt my feelings."

Sometimes, Lexa wonders if Anya really has a rock where her heart should be. A supernatural, blood-pumping rock, of course, but a rock nonetheless. Or, maybe, Anya is a psychopath. Maybe the blood money theory wasn't so far-fetched after all. That would explain the brazen lack of empathy for everyone else's feelings, most of all Lexa's. What does it say about Lexa that her one true friend is someone who sneezes literally every time Lexa says 'I love you'?

Not that Lexa says it a lot. Only once or twice every few years.

Just enough to have noticed the pattern.

"Are you really trying to blackmail me with vinyls?"

Anya fakes an affronted gasp, laying a hand on her heart. "Would I ever. Think of it as... an incentive."

Lexa really does love Anya, despite her friend's... unique demeanor. Anya helps her come out of her shell — by taking up all the space and forcing her out of her own metaphorical home — and every once in a while she likes to make sure Anya is aware of her gratitude. Sometimes, though, things get really fucking weird.

Lexa would still do anything for her best friend.

"Let's imagine, hypothetically - very hypothetically," she stresses, although Anya's burgeoning smirk tells Lexa she isn't so easily fooled, "that I agreed. What would happen next?"

Anya takes her feet off Lexa's desk and sits up straighter, perhaps aware of the importance of this moment. This, Lexa decides, will determine her answer.

"Well first, I'd have to get you a costar. Then we'd sign some legally binding shit, find a crew, and make the damn movie. Simple as that."

Anya leans forward, looking into her eyes. In Anya's, she sees honesty and a pressing need to reassure. It takes some of the pressure off her shoulders right away.

"Look, Lexa, you can say no. But your name won't be on anything related to the movie and I promise no one in this shitty town will ever find out you did this."

This is why Anya is Lexa's best friend. And it's why Lexa would do anything for her.

Even star in a porno.

"Okay."

Anya's inner smile must be really, really big, because Lexa knows how hard she tries to tamper its outward expression — and still her lips manage to lift into a grotesque grimace. Coming from Anya, it's the equivalent of a blissful grin.

"Okay?"

Lexa nods and closes her eyes, bracing herself for a bone-crushing hug. It never comes. When she opens her eyes, Anya's resting bitch face is back on.

"What, did you want a fucking hug?"

It's a blessing to have her rude friend back, Lexa guesses, because seeing Anya almost smile is fifty shades of unsettling. So she rolls her eyes and rolls with it.

Her next question demands her full focus, lest she makes an even bigger fool of herself than usual.

Lexa breathes in, makes sure all her co-workers are still otherwise entertained, breathes out. Smooths out a non-existent wrinkle in her pants, wets her lips for courage.

"Anyway," she treads with caution, "do you have someone in mind for the other main role?"

It's fitting that Harper McIntyre's hit song One More Betyreyal (one of her less inspired titles, if Lexa may say so) starts playing in that moment, for the look in Anya's eyes speaks of nothing but danger. Lexa wonders how much planning went into this conversation, so Anya could plan all her gut punches in advance.

"Clarke Griffin."

No. No. Anyone but her.

Clarke Griffin is the new recruit, although Lexa hardly understands how there can be someone new considering the station is broke and they’re already overstaffed — and none of them make nearly enough money for how much they laze around all day.

Clarke came from out of town with a fancy degree and was directly hired as an editor. She voices the early afternoon newscasts and Lexa curses the one-hour period during which she's forced to cohabitate with Clarke every day.

Apparently, Clarke had taken a liking to unnerving her, be it by smirking at her every time she catches Lexa staring or by making all sorts of inappropriate comments — to her ear. Lexa hates how much it affects her, but how can she possibly focus on reporting about Lionel "Real Sight" Foster swallowing his own wooden eye or how Jasper Jordan rescued his own private parts from the jaws of two slats of an unassuming park bench if someone keeps doing everything in their power to distract her?

Lexa has a theory (an iron-clad theory, if she may say so herself), and it's that Clarke is trying to get her fired so she can take her shift. It's the best shift of the day. There is no other possible explanation.

"You know what, I take it back. Now you need to convince two people to star in your porno."

"Oh, there's no need." Anya waves her argument away with staggering nonchalance. "Clarke's already said yes."

Wait, what? "But you told me we'd need to get me a costar."

Anya shrugs and Lexa is now seriously considering revisiting her psychopath theory. "I lied."

"You conniving, lying b—"

"Careful," Anya cuts in with a raised eyebrow. "I am under protection of the Capitola Astrologers Union."

"Of which you are president, treasurer, and the only legal member," Lexa reminds her. "And I think any upstanding judge would love to know how exactly every other name on the list has joined said union posthumously."

"I am an astrologer, Lexa. I can communicate with the dead. It's in my job description."

"It scares me that you're not even aware you're describing an entirely different profession."

Lexa sits back, staring at the ceiling (and the chewing gum Murphy glued there a year ago — he could've been an Olympic jumper if he committed to work the way he does to being an asshole), trying to come to terms with a single, harrowing probability: she's going to star in a porno with Clarke Griffin.

"l don't understand why it has to be Clarke."

Anya leans forward, propping her elbows on her knees, expression serious and ready to talk shop. The last time Lexa saw her like this was— actually, Lexa doesn't think she's ever seen Anya like this.

"Look, I've done some market analysis and most girl on girl pairings are a blonde and a brunette." Anya raises both her hands and starts counting off fingers, "Brittana, Petramos, Holstein, Wayhaught, Supercorp, Joanarty, Choni, the inaptly named Shoni, Deanoru, Dana and Alice, Bette and Tina, Catradora, Villaneve, Clexa—"

"What's Clexa?"

"I don't know, some chicks from this fucking terrible CW show."

"Do you like it?"

"Do I like what?"

"Clexa."

"Dude, I don't even know their fucking names!" Anya exclaims, exasperated. As if she's the victim here. "The only Clexa I ship is you and Blondie. Naked. On my porno. Clarke and Lexa. Clexa. Havin' very hot sexa."

"Smart," Lexa deadpans.

"I know."

"Why can't it be Niylah? She's blonde, too."

Anya's smirk is five hundred shades of gross. "I know you'd love to get up close and personal with Niylah's knick-knacks, but no."

Lexa decides to let the comment fly for the sake of her own sanity.

"Why Clarke, though?"

"Because you two have chemistry, you fucking dimwit."

Lexa snorts. Chemistry. Lexa has never heard of something so absurd. She and Clarke have as much chemistry as Harper McIntyre and any semblance of originality.

Which is to say, none at all.

"She makes very inappropriate comments," she argues instead, knowing full well that pressing on the topic of chemistry will only open way for some trademark crass joke from Anya.

"Yeah," her friend agrees, like it's obvious. "Because she knows you love them."

She most certainly does not.

"I most certainly do not."

"You do. Your freakishly tiny ears go red whenever she flirts with you. Your step falters when she makes one of those comments, for fuck's sake," Anya observes, pointing in Lexa's general direction, before leaving forward and laying a hand on her shoulder. "I'm sorry to tell you this, but you, my friend, are a walking lesbian cliché."

Lexa takes Anya's hand off her shoulder. "Can you please stop insulting my tragically conspicuous homosexuality?"

"Oh please," Anya scoffs. "I'm bisexual, I can say whatever I want."

"If my step actually faltered - which they don't - it would be because her comments are annoying, off-putting, unprofessional, inopportune, and... and inappropriate", she finishes lamely.

"And you fucking love them."

"I don't."

Anya leans back on her chair with an evil smirk, propping her feet on the table and crossing them at the ankles. Lexa tries to push them off to no avail.

"Legalities aside, it's very simple. Clarke has already said yes. I just recorded you saying yes."

Lexa sputters, "You what--"

"You're both legally bound now." Anya shrugs. "Look at it this way: it will be very educational. You'll finally learn how to make a girl come, and get paid for it. Sort of."

A beat of silence.

"Anya, are you aware that you say something at least vaguely criminal every five sentences? Something that could actually put you in prison?"

Anya clicks her tongue, sinking farther into her chair, and lowers her sunglasses to her eyes.

"I've got friends everywhere, Lex. Let's just say I've dipped more than my fingers in my fair share of pies, if you catch my drift." A second later, she lowers her sunglasses just enough to reveal her eyes. "That means my tongue. My tongue's been in a lot of pies, too."

Lexa doesn't doubt that for a second.

"What I need to know is," Anya adds, taking off her sunglasses and throwing them across the room, "will you dip your fingers in the porn pie?"

Like this conversation hasn't caused enough trauma for thirty lifetimes.

"If I say no, will you still give me back my vinyls?"

"Absolutely fucking not."

Lexa swallows, clenches her jaw, and thinks of all those lonely nights spent in the couch clutching her record player and sharing cookie dough ice cream with it, longing for long-gone times when she'd dance to the mellow voices of the likes Billy Ocean and Ella Fitzgerald.

"My answer is yes."

#that moodboard is way too serious for this lol #clexa #clexa au #clexa fic #clexa fanfiction #clexa fanfic #calmap #my fics #mine

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angst-fairygodmother · 3 years

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Girl Talk (The Song of Sway Lake Fic)

A/N: The moment has finally arrived! The first official collab/crossover between myself and @miss-kittys-magical-library! I’m really excited for how this came out, and how much fun we had writing it together. 😊 Word Count: 3127 Rating: T - mild language, brief mention of blood, discussion of violence

~The Papermill bookstore, Sway Lake~

Selina burst through the door of the bookstore. She almost doesn't wait for Jess to say hello or ask questions. Selina is overcome with adrenaline, the exhilaration of what she did. A giant smile spread across her lips. There's almost a dreamy look in her eyes.

She's covered in blood: her hands, her jeans, the bottom of her shirt. Selina held her hands like a surgeon so she didn't touch anything.

Jess’s mouth hung open while she pointed nervously towards the upstairs. Her friend knew where to find what she needed.

Selina comes out of the hot shower knowing Jess will be in the room waiting. She found clean clothes but stopped to study herself in the mirror. Somehow she felt like her body had changed somehow.

Selina caught a picture of her and Jess and held it up. How far they've come from the girls in the photo on her best friend’s dresser.

She glimpsed Jess in the mirror, a strange smirk on her face. Selina knew something was up. She handed the picture to her friend and spoke,

“Can you believe this was us?”

------

There had been a time in life where Selina and Jess had told each other everything, no matter what. And yet somehow this summer, one of the most eventful in recent history, Jess hadn’t told her best friend anything. Anyone who had spent any time on the lake knew about tensions between the Sways and...basically everyone, but especially Selina’s mother and her relatives. And more than that, it had been kind of nice to have a good secret all to herself for a little while. But she missed her friend, and would have loved her advice on what to do about the boy who was quickly becoming someone important, and a problem for her heart.

She was just thinking about the other girl, wondering if she should call her after work, maybe suggest a bonfire or late night rowboat race like they used to have, when Selina burst through the door. Jess’s eyes fell to the blood first, and then rose quickly to Selina’s face and the expression that didn’t match the apparent situation at all.

A thousand questions raced through her mind as she pointed her best friend toward her bathroom (not that Selina didn’t know where it was by now) and made quick work of closing the shop. She didn’t seem hurt, so everything else could wait. While Selina washed herself clean, Jess dug for any clothes left behind the last time she had come for a visit, and failing that, any old shorts and t-shirt. She left them on top of the dresser and poked her head into the bathroom to gather the discarded bloody garments and throw them into the wash.

Selina was standing in the bedroom, studying herself in the mirror when Jess returned, and for a moment she wondered, again, if her friend was injured.

“Can you believe this was us, what?”

Selina laughed, “These girls. We’re just girls here trying to be grown women. I sort of treated you like I did Sunny.”

She waited for Jess to maybe bristle or tense up at his name. “I marched on to the beach, saw the first girl my age who had SOMETHING in common with me, and declared you mine. We aren't little girls anymore.”

There was a bittersweetness in her voice. Selina didn't even care that she was naked.

Jess laughed. She remembered that day, meeting Selina after escaping her siblings in search of a moment of peace and quiet, far from what actually found her instead. But they had got on so quickly she'd forgotten to be angry about it.

"No, we really aren't," she agreed with a tinge of nostalgic sadness in her own voice.

She leaned back on her hands on the bed, watching her friend study the picture. "I never minded, you know. It was kind of nice to be claimed by somebody. You'll always be my first for that," she bit her lip, hoping the joke didn't come off as uncomfortable given the situation.

Selina finally dressed and sat beside her friend on the bed. Her knuckles caressed the other woman’s cheek before she swept the hair from her face. Without a thought, she leaned in and gently pressed her lips to Jess’s, tongue lingered a bit before she broke away.

“That's from Sunny too.” Selina laid on her side tucked under Jess’s arm. “How is it that I was here for a few weeks, and youuuu have been tramping around Sway Lake with some chick?! Have you gone FULL lesbian?” she dropped her voice low.

Jess turned onto her side, propping a head on her arm to face Selina.

"You two are so weird," she rolled her eyes. "I don't think I'll ever get used to that."

Her stomach flipped at the thought of Sunny, eyes cast to the ceiling as her thoughts wandered. She loved Ollie, but there was something raw about the idea of losing the other boy, even though he wasn't really hers anymore and hadn't been in quite some time.

She quirked a teasing eyebrow as she returned to the present moment and the woman beside her.

"If I was going to do that, do you think it would be with anyone else than you? Whoever gave you your gossip needs glasses."

Selina’s mouth dropped open, “There's a guy around here with hair that long?!”

She linked her arm through Jess’s and pulled her in for a hug. The other woman now wrapped up in her embrace. Selina let her chin rest on her friend’s head as she stroked her hair. “You feel happier. Content. Like you're just drifting along. I know you loved Sunny in your own way, but this is different. It's the,” she ran a hand up and down Jess’s body without touching it, “this. Papa would call it your aura.”

Jess grinned. "I am. I'm really, really happy," she answered dreamily. "Ollie's a really sweet guy. But only here for the summer…"

She swallowed down the lingering bitter taste her argument with Ollie the previous morning had left in her mouth, not wanting to burden the conversation with her fears. Especially not when she still had so many questions of her own.

"But don't think asking about my love life is going to get you out of explaining yourself, missy." She teased.

Selina sat up, “Oliver Sway?! Jessica! Come on. Any other Tom, Dick or asshole at this stupid lake. Sunny. Sunny’s RIGHT THERE. Just grab him by the ankle and bring him back to Earth. He needs you.”

She took a breath, “That.. harpie will tear you apart because you aren't good breeding. It's Sway Lake because that's what those upper crust cunts hold over this entire town. Sway. Lakes dont belong to one family, they should belong to EVERY person. Are Sunny and I the only ones NOT under this family’s curse? First Tom, then Nikolai and now you.”

Selina’s voice was full of disappointment more than anger. She looked at her hands. Her palms, white and clean, were just caked brownish red not even an hour ago. “It can't be the both of us.”

"Nikolai?!" Jess asked, staring for a moment before doubling over in laughter. "Oh god it all makes sense now."

She struggled to contain her laughter, gasping for air and wiping away the tears in her eyes from it.

"Fuck Charlotte Sway, I couldn't care less what she thinks," she said, sobering and then sighing. "It's not like I planned on falling in love with Ollie. But I did, and it kinda scares me. I really really don't want to lose him. And he hates her and the whole legacy bullshit as much as anyone. Let it all rot or burn or whatever."

Jess was silent for a moment. It was hard to say Selina was her only or even oldest friend. But they were best friends, for certain, and they knew everything about each other. There were even times when they were younger that Selina and Sunny had talked about soulmates and Jess had wondered if she were hers. Which is why her stomach twisted with guilt as she realized just how unsettled Selina was, and pretending not to be.

"But enough about me, it doesn't matter. Are you okay?"

Selina took Jess’s hand in hers. She laced their fingers together and laid down again. This time she and her friend were side by side. She was certain no one in any spoken language had invented a word for what the two of them were.

Selina knew it was why Leon and Johnny always ended phone calls and visits with long hugs and I love yous. Why Honey and Klaus showered each other with intimacy and affection Honey showed Leon. Friendships that made people question your sexual intentions. It was probably something in the Kostas skin, like a pheromone.

The 23 year old pushed the thought out of her mind that everyone around them was their friend because they didn't have a choice. Instead she squeezed Jess’s hand.

“You know Honey, she holds grudges with a tight grip. There's only two people she hates: Charlotte Sway and Reginald Hargreeves, and he's the one she really wants dead. Charlie is lonely and miserable. That's punishment enough for Mama. Papa always says she would make a great Mafia don. She DID like Tim Sway;

cried when he killed himself. He wasn't even Charlot-” Selina cut herself off. “Either way Ollie must take after him then. I hope he does. I think we played together when we were little?”

She realized she was avoiding the question and wanted to deflect solely on Jess. Sunny wasn't the only one who slept around up here, or had a weird effect. Selina again panicked if maybe, somehow, what was in him was in her. That the Russian on a canoe in the middle of the night would show up in the Village, screaming at her in the dead of night. Some of the guys she fucked flopped around on top of Selina for a few minutes, got off while she stared at the ceiling. Then they laid claim to her like any White guy who thought he owned someone else’s land.

“And don't laugh like that either! I was doing my duty as a future nurse and helping someone who got hurt.”

She watched Jess cross her arms, even on her back. She was giving Selina THAT stare. Selina threw her hands up. “Ohhh,” she whined, ”I was swimming, floating really. Probably out further than I should be in the middle of the night, but that fucking moon. And there he was on his way to get rid of those horrendous jet skis of Jimmy’s. And he was flirtatious and made me groan, but also laugh?”

Selina had pulled her knees up to her chest so she could hug them. A far off look on her face. “And he's very.. I didn't really pay attention to what he looked like. WHO, right? It was just this fire that went through me. Like I knew him?

“Mama always talks about the day I was born and speaking into existence this notion. That every version of her will be loved by and love Papa. She thought it was blood loss creating insanity, but Sunny and I had designs on a love like theirs.”

“And the way Nikolai made me feel, and the way he knew my body? We didn't even fuck; not like that. I haven't cum that hard or much ever. Even by myself.”

“Then he got hurt, and I made Sunny take me to him. Ollie had saved him, right? As we're stitching him back together, I see his face. That face I grew up with three times over. He's fashioned for me, Jess. Maybe like Ollie is for you. But Nikolai is Leon and Nicklaus and Klaus and he's made to be mine.”

"No, no I'm not laughing at that, or you," Jess promised. "Just...the first decent conversation Nikolai and I had, he mentioned meeting someone. Matching his description to you is what's funny. And the fact that you two are such opposites." Jess paused, smiling in fondness for both parties in question. "But it's safe to say he likes you, a lot."

She felt silly now, not putting it together sooner. After all, there was no one else in the world she could think more aptly described as a siren made of the moon. And as funny as it was on paper, something about Selina and Nikolai made sense.

And, it made her heart beat giddily. Her faith in fate was complicated, but when it came to the Kostases, the concept was shockingly simple. And it seemed impossible that this was just coincidence, the four of them tied together like this.

'Or maybe,' she silently scolded, 'it's wishful thinking so you can tell yourself you're not being completely crazy.'

The rest of what Selina said registered belatedly and she blanched. "Wait. That was a lot of blood. Are you saying that it was all Nikolai's?"

“It was,” Selina replied softly.

"Jesus. What did he do, get in a knife fight?" Her voice was a mixture of concern and annoyance.

She could see Nikolai doing something like that, to defend his own pride which he deflected onto Ollie, or for some other stubborn, idiotic thing. And now that there were two people she loved who would get hurt if something happened to him, she made a note to have a little chat with him about being so reckless. And to find Ollie later to check on both boys.

"I know if he had you helping take care of him, I don't have to ask if he'll be alright." She nudged Selina teasingly with a shoulder, hoping to break up some of the heavy, contemplative air settling over them both.

“Knives don't cause QUITE as much damage as you think. Unless you hit a vein. Diego showed me how to do it effectively once. Plus if he's like the others, Nikolai probably prefers fists to weapons. Or the spider monkey sleeper-hold thing Klaus and Sunny do. Although Papa stabbed Uncle Jonny once, it was just an artificial wound.”

Selina suddenly scooped Jess up in her arms so they could go back to a cuddle. She tangled her legs and arms around Jess to sort of dominate her personal space. Her forehead pressed into her friend’s neck.

“He and Jimmy got into it, and they were on the boat dock. Nik slipped and hit his head. Ollie swam for like, the first time ever to get him up into a boat. Had pressure on it. I just stitched him with fishing wire. They'll do better at the ER.”

Selina sighed, “If he's like them he wouldn't die anyways. Klaus died like twice in a few days, also head injuries? Either way, Nikolai would’ve been fine without me.”

Then almost like an afterthought, “Did you say he talked to you about me? Probably something about conquests and the Russian army. But you! YOU FELL IN LOVE this summer! I got my pussy licked and think he's this mythical soulmate. You're in actual, real love.”

Selina propped up on her elbow, “Have you slept together? No I'm sorry, YOU get to call it MAKING LOVE!!” she burst into a fit of giggles around cheeks fired by jealousy. “I am happy for you. I promise. I'm glad Sunny.. I'm just happy.”

"No, actually," Jess said, shifting around Selina so they tucked together more cleanly, like two matched puzzle pieces. This kind of closeness wasn't Jess's favorite thing, but Selina knew that, and Jess trusted that if she didn't need it, she wouldn't be initiating it. "It was surprisingly non-militant. And only one nautical reference."

Jess hesitated, remembering some of the incidents Selina had to deal with and one or two more from the summers that Sunny, or Jess herself, had headed off before they got far enough to be a concern (or for Selina to even know). She wanted her friend to know just what Nikolai had said, and that he very much did not just see her as just some conquest. But the line between sweet and creepy was a hazy one at best. She brought one hand away from the tangle to fret the corner of her thumb between her teeth while she thought it over.

"I'm not saying I'm jealous...but I thought it was romantic. And dramatic of course, look who we're talking about. But dramatic isn't always bad. I wish you'd stop dismissing yourself like that. Soulmate or no, you have some sort of feelings for him which seem serious; one might call it a crush at least. And he made you feel good. He made you happy. You're allowed that. You deserve it. And now, for the moment if not more, you have it, savor it."

"As for Ollie and me..."

She froze, frowning as she struggled to figure out just what to say. There was a part of her that feared a reputation of some kind (even though it was just Ollie that she'd been a first time for, and Sunny, but he didn't count). And another part that wanted to keep it to herself, even though most of her wanted to share. She bit again at her thumb, searching for words.

"It's not that big of a deal?"

Selina bit her lip before a yawn escaped her. “One: a crush is a crush because you can get hurt. Otherwise, it would be called a cushion. I think that's what Papa said once. Or was it Klaus?”

Selina closed her eyes now. “Either way, it's a very big deal! I can feel the difference in you. I want you to be in love. To maybe leave Sway Lake. Come back to the city with me? Close up this place for a few months. You can live with me. Or Oliver for a little while. Oh lovely little Oliver making my sweet Jessica come ‘round again. All your sadness and little pieces everywhere. I couldn't stitch you back together with fishing wire, could I? I shouldn't have let Sunny break your heart. I just didn't want being around me to remind you of him. I'm sorry. But Ollie.. he’ll.. Sorry, I think I'm a bit delirious from adrenaline? Mind if I nap a bit?”

But Selina was fast asleep before Jess could give permission.

Jess shook her head with a smile, carefully extricating herself and tucking her friend into the bed. Selina had given her a lot to think about.

#hopefully this formatting worked #it was not at first #author collaboration #Jess O'Neill and Selina Kostas #Moonbrella Lake Crossover #The Song of Sway Lake fic

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hellomynameisbisexual · 3 years

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Here's a shortlist of those who realized that I — a cis woman who'd identified as heterosexual for decades of life — was in fact actually bi, long before I realized it myself recently: my sister, all my friends, my boyfriend, and the TikTok algorithm.

On TikTok, the relationship between user and algorithm is uniquely (even sometimes uncannily) intimate. An app which seemingly contains as many multitudes of life experiences and niche communities as there are people in the world, we all start in the lowest common denominator of TikTok. Straight TikTok (as it's popularly dubbed) initially bombards your For You Page with the silly pet videos and viral teen dances that folks who don't use TikTok like to condescendingly reduce it to.

Quickly, though, TikTok begins reading your soul like some sort of divine digital oracle, prying open layers of your being never before known to your own conscious mind. The more you use it, the more tailored its content becomes to your deepest specificities, to the point where you get stuff that's so relatable that it can feel like a personal attack (in the best way) or (more dangerously) even a harmful trigger from lifelong traumas.

For example: I don't know what dark magic (read: privacy violations) immediately clued TikTok into the fact that I was half-Brazilian, but within days of first using it, Straight TikTok gave way to at first Portuguese-speaking then broader Latin TikTok. Feeling oddly seen (being white-passing and mostly American-raised, my Brazilian identity isn't often validated), I was liberal with the likes, knowing that engagement was the surefire way to go deeper down this identity-affirming corner of the social app.

TikTok made lots of assumptions from there, throwing me right down the boundless, beautiful, and oddest multiplicities of Alt TikTok, a counter to Straight TikTok's milquetoast mainstreamness.

Home to a wide spectrum of marginalized groups, I was giving out likes on my FYP like Oprah, smashing that heart button on every type of video: from TikTokers with disabilities, Black and Indigenous creators, political activists, body-stigma-busting fat women, and every glittering shade of the LGBTQ cornucopia. The faves were genuine, but also a way to support and help offset what I knew about the discriminatory biases in TikTok's algorithm.

My diverse range of likes started to get more specific by the minute, though. I wasn't just on general Black TikTok anymore, but Alt Cottagecore Middle-Class Black Girl TikTok (an actual label one creator gave her page's vibes). Then it was Queer Latina Roller Skating Girl TikTok, Women With Non-Hyperactive ADHD TikTok, and then a double whammy of Women Loving Women (WLW) TikTok alternating between beautiful lesbian couples and baby bisexuals.

Looking back at my history of likes, the transition from queer “ally” to “salivating simp” is almost imperceptible.

There was no one precise "aha" moment. I started getting "put a finger down" challenges that wouldn't reveal what you were putting a finger down for until the end. Then, 9-fingers deep (winkwink), I'd be congratulated for being 100% bisexual. Somewhere along the path of getting served multiple WLW Disney cosplays in a single day and even dom lesbian KinkTok roleplay — or whatever the fuck Bisexual Pirate TikTok is — deductive reasoning kind of spoke for itself.

But I will never forget the one video that was such a heat-seeking missile of a targeted attack that I was moved to finally text it to my group chat of WLW friends with a, "Wait, am I bi?" To which the overwhelming consensus was, "Magic 8 Ball says, 'Highly Likely.'"

Serendipitously posted during Pride Month, the video shows a girl shaking her head at the caption above her head, calling out confused and/or closeted queers who say shit like, "I think everyone is a LITTLE bisexual," to the tune of "Closer" by The Chainsmokers. When the lyrics land on the word "you," she points straight at the screen — at me — her finger and inquisitive look piercing my hopelessly bisexual soul like Cupid's goddamn arrow.

Oh no, the voice inside my head said, I have just been mercilessly perceived.

As someone who had, in fact, done feminist studies at a tiny liberal arts college with a gender gap of about 70 percent women, I'd of course dabbled. I've always been quick to bring up the Kinsey scale, to champion a true spectrum of sexuality, and to even declare (on multiple occasions) that I was, "straight, but would totally fuck that girl!"

Oh no, the voice inside my head returned, I've literally just been using extra words to say I was bi.

After consulting the expertise of my WLW friend group (whose mere existence, in retrospect, also should've clued me in on the flashing neon pink, purple, and blue flag of my raging bisexuality), I ran to my boyfriend to inform him of the "news."

"Yeah, baby, I know. We all know," he said kindly.

"How?!" I demanded.

Well for one, he pointed out, every time we came across a video of a hot girl while scrolling TikTok together, I'd without fail watch the whole way through, often more than once, regardless of content. (Apparently, straight girls do not tend to do this?) For another, I always breathlessly pointed out when we'd pass by a woman I found beautiful, often finding a way to send a compliment her way. ("I'm just a flirt!" I used to rationalize with a hand wave, "Obvs, I'm not actually sexually attracted to them!") Then, I guess, there were the TED Talk-like rants I'd subject him to about the thinly veiled queer relationship in Adventure Time between Princess Bubblegum and Marcelyne the Vampire Queen — which the cowards at Cartoon Network forced creators to keep as subtext!

And, well, when you lay it all out like that...

But my TikTok-fueled bisexual awakening might actually speak less to the omnipotence of the app's algorithm, and more to how heteronormativity is truly one helluva drug.

Sure, TikTok bombarded me with the thirst traps of my exact type of domineering masc lady queers, who reduced me to a puddle of drool I could no longer deny. But I also recalled a pivotal moment in college when I briefly questioned my heterosexuality, only to have a lesbian friend roll her eyes and chastise me for being one of those straight girls who leads Actual Queer Women on. I figured she must know better. So I never pursued any of my lady crushes in college, which meant I never experimented much sexually, which made me conclude that I couldn't call myself bisexual if I'd never had actual sex with a woman. I also didn't really enjoy lesbian porn much, though the fact that I'd often find myself fixating on the woman during heterosexual porn should've clued me into that probably coming more from how mainstream lesbian porn is designed for straight men.

The ubiquity of heterormativity, even when unwittingly perpetrated by members of the queer community, is such an effective self-sustaining cycle. Aside from being met with queer-gating (something I've since learned bi folks often experience), I had a hard time identifying my attraction to women as genuine attraction, simply because it felt different to how I was attracted to men.

Heteronormativity is truly one helluva drug.

So much of women's sexuality — of my sexuality — can feel defined by that carnivorous kind of validation you get from men. I met no societal resistance in fully embodying and exploring my desire for men, either (which, to be clear, was and is insatiable slut levels of wanting that peen.) But in retrospect, I wonder how many men I slept with not because I was truly attracted to them, but because I got off on how much they wanted me.

My attraction to women comes with a different texture of eroticism. With women (and bare with a baby bi, here), the attraction feels more shared, more mutual, more tender rather than possessive. It's no less raw or hot or all-consuming, don't get me wrong. But for me at least, it comes more from a place of equality rather than just power play. I love the way women seem to see right through me, to know me, without us really needing to say a word.

I am still, as it turns out, a sexual submissive through-and-through, regardless of what gender my would-be partner is. But, ignorantly and unknowingly, I'd been limiting my concept of who could embody dominant sexual personas to cis men. But when TikTok sent me down that glorious rabbit hole of masc women (who know exactly what they're doing, btw), I realized my attraction was not to men, but a certain type of masculinity. It didn't matter which body or genitalia that presentation came with.

There is something about TikTok that feels particularly suited to these journeys of sexual self-discovery and, in the case of women loving women, I don't think it's just the prescient algorithm. The short-form video format lends itself to lightning bolt-like jolts of soul-bearing nakedness, with the POV camera angles bucking conventions of the male gaze, which entrenches the language of film and TV in heterosexual male desire.

In fairness to me, I'm far from the only one who missed their inner gay for a long time — only to have her pop out like a queer jack-in-the-box throughout a near year-long quarantine that led many of us to join TikTok. There was the baby bi mom, and scores of others who no longer had to publicly perform their heterosexuality during lockdown — only to realize that, hey, maybe I'm not heterosexual at all?

Flooded with video after video affirming my suspicions, reflecting my exact experiences as they happened to others, the change in my sexual identity was so normalized on TikTok that I didn't even feel like I needed to formally "come out." I thought this safe home I'd found to foster my baby bisexuality online would extend into the real world.

But I was in for a rude awakening.

Testing out my bisexuality on other platforms, casually referring to it on Twitter, posting pictures of myself decked out in a rainbow skate outfit (which I bought before realizing I was queer), I received nothing but unquestioning support and validation. Eventually, I realized I should probably let some members of my family know before they learned through one of these posts, though.

Daunted by the idea of trying to tell my Latina Catholic mother and Swiss Army veteran father (who's had a crass running joke about me being a "lesbian" ever since I first declared myself a feminist at age 12), I chose the sibling closest to me. Seeing as how gender studies was one of her majors in college too, I thought it was a shoo-in. I sent an off-handed, joke-y but serious, "btw I'm bi now!" text, believing that's all that would be needed to receive the same nonchalant acceptance I found online.

It was not.

I didn't receive a response for two days. Hurt and panicked by what was potentially my first mild experience of homophobia, I called them out. They responded by insisting we need to have a phone call for such "serious" conversations. As I calmly tried to express my hurt on said call, I was told my text had been enough to make this sibling worry about my mental wellbeing. They said I should be more understanding of why it'd be hard for them to (and I'm paraphrasing) "think you were one way for twenty-eight years" before having to contend with me deciding I was now "something else."

But I wasn't "something else," I tried to explain, voice shaking. I hadn't knowingly been deceiving or hiding this part of me. I'd simply discovered a more appropriate label. But it was like we were speaking different languages. Other family members were more accepting, thankfully. There are many ways I'm exceptionally lucky, my IRL environment as supportive as Baby Bi TikTok. Namely, I'm in a loving relationship with a man who never once mistook any of it as a threat, instead giving me all the space in the world to understand this new facet of my sexuality.

I don't have it all figured out yet. But at least when someone asks if I listen to Girl in Red on social media, I know to answer with a resounding, "Yes," even though I've never listened to a single one of her songs. And for now, that's enough.

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alittlebitgoofy · 3 years

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if i had my way i would be yours chapter five (taywhora)

fuck ME this chapter kicked my ass but i’m gonna go insane if i go over it any longer so here it is, the long awaited chapter with some smut. it’s the last scene if you want to skip it, the rest is clean

ao3 link

Tayce felt like she was floating on air when A’whora got close to her. Her heart couldn’t handle the cuteness of her roommate in their affectionate moments. She had no idea what she did, innocently cuddling into her as friends did.

Because they were just friends. Only friends and nothing more. And it totally wasn’t eating Tayce up inside with every moment she realised that. Not at all.

A’whora herself was just glad to have her friend back, living without Tayce in close proximity was so strange, she loved the way the brunette always kept things interesting in their flat. There was always something going on with her and even when there wasn’t she made something happen. Somehow trying to relax and watch a movie turned into a gossip session, rife with giggles and stories of stupid things no one else would find as funny. But it made them laugh until their faces hurt. Because they were together.

A’whora took Tayce’s coming out as a chance to bond over something different. She introduced Tayce to small bits of queer culture at a time, though she’d absorbed a lot through being best friends with a lesbian for years and having their whole circle of friends being part of the LGBT.

“How do I know this will scream I like women?” she’d questioned while A’whora helped her with outfits for a night out. The pair were determined to make sure Tayce had a good first experience at a gay bar while out. She was wearing a pair of black skinny jeans, a similarly dark flannel shirt, and a leather jacket. She could not have looked more gay if she tried, though the way the jeans clung to her ass made A’whora rethink agreeing to help her with everything. How was she so hot? She would look so good under her clothes, what A’whora could give to rip that flannel off her and-

She needed to sort herself out before they left. Her feelings, how hot Tayce was and alcohol was a dangerous combination. She could hold herself together if only Tayce would stop looking so good.

---

They were late to get there, they always were with Tayce’s lack of time management and A’whora having to spend hours getting ready for anything. It was a bad combination but that didn’t motivate them to fix it, plus people were used to Tayce being late, including A’whora because they were attached at the hip.

They joined Bimini and Asttina once they got inside, Lawrence and Ellie joining soon after.

“So what actually happened? She was fuming, you were having communication issues and now it’s all fine? You two never cease to amaze me.” Asttina got right to the point, an eyebrow raised as A’whora gave a nervous smile

Tayce felt relaxed by the alcohol in her system, though neither her nor A’whora were particularly drunk; they were a fun level of tipsy, giggling amongst themselves much to their friends' chagrin. A’whora was joking about something, Tayce found it hard to focus on her speech with how cute she was. Her dimples showed as she smiled, laughing at her own joke.

“Tayce? Are you even listening! That was really funny!” She whined, poking Tayce in the shoulder to get her attention, pouting as she got an eye roll in response.

“Maybe if it was that funny I would have listened.” Tayce quipped back, holding back a laugh as A’whora whined even more.

“You’re such a bitch, why are we even friends?”

“Because, someone has to put up with you. Figured I'd give the world a favour.” Tayce smirked, delighting in the huff that the blonde let out before taking another sip of her drink.

“Tayce!”

“I’m kidding, you’re sweet if not a bit annoying sometimes, it’s what I love about you, you know that, dumbass”

“Yeah, I am pretty loveable.” A’whora bounced back quickly from her annoyance, her chest warming at the compliment. She tried to play it off, flicking her hair in an overdramatic show of confidence.

“Your ego isn’t” Tayce deadpanned, erupting into laughter as A’whora gasped, hand on her chest in exaggerated shock.

“You’re cute, don’t let it get to your head though.” Tayce wondered if it was the alcohol giving her the confidence to say what she thought. A’whora could react in any kind of way but she didn’t care.

“You’re not so bad looking yourself, still a bit of an ass though.”

“You say that like you’re not the biggest cunt I've ever met.”

“Well, you are what you eat.” The blonde grinned as Tayce shook her head at the comment. She delighted in shocking her and causing reactions,

“You’re disgusting oh my god.”

“What? You’ll discover how good it is soon enough. I know it’s been a minute but you’ll find a girl to show you soon.”

“Aurora please stop talking about my lack of a sex life.” Tayce shook her head, for all that she loved about her A’whora did not have a way with words. She was open to a fault and found it hilarious how squeamish Tayce would get when she got explicit. She could handle most of it after a while but the way she would switch mid-conversation was something too unpredictable to deal with.

Despite all that, she was still adorable in the way she burst into giggles at Tayce’s plea, agreeing while trying to compose herself.

“What are you two laughing about, it must be something hilarious to have her laughing like a diseased seal.” Lawrence interrupted them, though Tayce was thankful that A’hwora couldn’t go further with her comments. She wasn’t drunk enough to deal with it yet.

“Wouldn’t you lovebirds like to know? You two been shagging in the toilets or something? Haven’t seen you since you came in here.” Tayce looked them up and down, noticing the lipstick slightly smudged. They’d been getting up to something, it was obvious by the way Lawrence stammered trying to respond with a quip and failing. Ellie stood silent, shaken by how perceptive Tayce could be.

A’whora had no such reaction, laughing harder as they stood slack-jawed and hanging onto Tayce in a feeble attempt to calm herself.

“At least they’re finally doing something about it, watching them fumble around their feelings while ignoring any possibility of mutual feelings was just painful.'' A'whora shook her head, delighting in the way Tayce snickered, nodding emphatically in agreement. She internally sighed in relief that Lawrence was still in shock and didn’t notice the way she looked at Tayce when she laughed.

She didn’t need them pulling attention to her feelings.

Not when she could barely hold them in.

“What is it with everyone tonight? Bim and Asttina are all over each other, have a bit of class you hounds!” Tayce exclaimed, shaking her head in mock judgement at the couples. Part of her still didn’t love seeing people in a situation she found almost impossible but it was easier now, as if the weight had finally been lifted when she came out to A’whora. It felt good to be understood, to have someone so attuned to you they knew what was happening and exactly what she needed. Tayce shifted, perhaps it was the alcohol but she couldn’t help but think she didn’t deserve how lovely A’whora was. Though no one did, she was perfect, too good for the world she lived in.

She ached to verbalise it, pull the blonde close, and whisper how much she adored her, though Lawrence and Ellie were still there and they were in public. She just wanted to give affection but it didn’t come easy. Maybe with some time?

The scots seemed more interested in each other than whatever light conversation had happened between the four of them, something must have been in the air to explain the way their companions split off into pairs, interested in no one else than their partners.

Tayce wished she could be one of them, hold A’whora close and press soft kisses to her as the alcohol broke down her barriers, leaving her a melted putty in A’whora’s hands.

“What’s got you thinking so hard? Is everyone pairing off making you have an existential crisis or something?” A’whora jabbed lightly, Tayce letting out a laugh at the comment. She didn’t know how to respond, it wasn’t easy to communicate your feelings to your roommate, the fear it would make things unfixable between them heavy on her heart after their previous spat. It wasn’t worth the risk, not to lose her.

“I just think it’s funny how they paired up. Lawrence and Ellie used to mope with us about being single while Bims was the only one with any balls to say something to someone they liked. Now it’s just us two.” Tayce mused, feeling a hand take her own and give it a slight squeeze. A’whora stared at her, smiling softly. IT was an innocent gesture that sent her reeling further. She really had no idea the power she had in making Tayce feel like she was floating at any sign of affection.

“It’ll happen to us eventually, you’ve only just come out there’s no need to rush things, no matter who you date.”

“Thanks, Rory. You’ve been really helpful with all of this.” Tayce’s softer tone told the blonde everything she needed to know. Her words were tender, heartfelt. It was a rarity for Tayce to be so open, it felt good.

No words had to be exchanged. Maybe something was different, they stayed close, Tayce’s hand stayed held by A’whora’s own. Tayce felt a warmth envelop her body that couldn’t have been the alcohol. The way A’whora looked at her just added to it, something playful in her eyes as she smiled at Tayce as if she’d done anything more than sitting there and melt over her pretty roommate.

“Shit, I think everyone is going to do their own thing, Tayce, maybe we should go?”

“Yeah, I was getting kind of bored of watching them almost fuck in a bar. Takeaway?” Tayce asked, smirking as A’whora’s eyes lit up at the suggestion.

“You read my mind.”

---

“You good there, Rory?” Tayce watched her roommate distractedly attempting to put some chips in her mouth and failing, blinking in surprise at Tayce calling her attention. She shrugged, the alcohol had mostly faded and she was too busy trying to distract herself with anything that wasn’t Tayce’s current state of dress. She’d complained of being too hot, stripping into a bra, and still in her jeans. It drove a’whora insane to look at. She couldn’t hold herself in if she looked for too long. Though she turned to Tayce as she spoke, soon coming to regret her decision.

“You like what you’re seeing?” Tayce felt A’whora’s eyes on her, mouth agape. She wanted to mess with her, winking. Internally she was delighting in the way she blushed at the comment. Was she always this easy to rile up? It was probably the alcohol but they both felt pretty sober now. Something about having the blonde unable to take her eyes off her was enchanting. It made her heart speed up, something fluttering in her chest but something else she wasn’t so used to. Something churning below, a desire for a certain someone she was finding harder to contain by the minute.

“You should put a shirt on,” A’whora muttered out meekly, unable to verbalise much of anything above a pitiful whine. She couldn’t do this, not with Tayce being so hot and her being so pent up. It had been too long, she just wanted to hold someone and make them scream in pleasure. She wanted to know what Tayce would sound like mid climax, would she squeal? Breathe heavily? A’whora pegged her as a quieter person, letting out low moans and grunts as she was pleasured. She wanted to test it, see what would make her squirm and-

Fuck.

She was too horny to be dealing with this.

“What if I didn’t? Would it drive you insane if I took this shirt off? You wanna see my tits, don’t you, you absolute hound.” Tayce eyed her up like a predator staring at its prey. The way she licked her lips while maintaining eye contact sent A’whora. She couldn’t handle it anymore. She crawled over, placing Tayce’s box of chips on the side before unhooking her bra. Tayce let out a hum of curiosity, nodding to signal A’whora to keep going.

This was far too interesting not to watch. The way A’whora’s eyes stayed trained on her chest, flickering up to gauge Tayce’s reaction every time she did something. With another nod she went further, hands cupping Tayce’s breasts, thumb running over her nipples, and delighting in the way Tayce’s breath hitched. She kept at it, Tayce letting out small noises at the action. Something was about to happen, they both knew it. It was the last chance to bail out before they ended up doing it and Tayce just nodded once more, eyes serious as she smiled at the blonde.

A’whora took the go-ahead, pulling her into a searing kiss. Tayce could feel her lust in the way she grabbed at her hair, lightly pulling it to steer her into where she wanted. Tayce followed her instincts, letting her lips trail down A’whora’s cheek and feeling herself wetten at the noises she let out.

A’whora was loud, she knew that already but to be causing those noises and seeing her squirm was doing something to Tayce. She couldn’t hold herself back. She had to close the distance between their lips as A’whora let out a soft moan.

“We should take this to the bedroom,” A’whora spoke quietly, not sure how much she could get out without Tayce getting more noise out of her.

Tayce nodded, following A’whora as she pulled her into her room and lightly pushed her down onto the bed. She couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow as she got on top of her, hovering about her body as she pulled her into another lustful kiss.

Tayce tried to get the same rise out of A’whora, running her hands all over her body. Grasping at her tits as A’whora had before. Something had shifted in her the second they hit that mattress. Her eyes sparkled with something that sent a shiver down Tayce’s spine. She knew exactly what she wanted and wouldn’t focus on anything else.

She wanted Tayce, and she was going to get her.

A’whora took the lead, her hands exploring the body beneath her as Tayce groaned in pleasure. The sound encouraged her more, snaking her hands down to where her jeans were still on, unzipping them, and helping Tayce out of them. A few fingers fell to her underwear, rubbing through it to see where she was and delighting in the soft whine Tayce let out.

A thought crossed her mind about making her beg for it, drawing something out of Tayce that she’d never seen but it wasn’t the right time for that. She just wanted to make her feel good, they could play around next time.

Tayce didn’t know how to deal with the pleasure erupting through her body. She muffled a moan into her hand at how well A’whora seemed to know what she was doing. Every flex of her fingers sent ripples through Tayce. She was helpless against her touch and could only let out low moans begging for more.

A’whora blessed her, speeding up her fingers. Tayce threw her head back, shamelessly letting out a loud groan at how good it felt. She couldn’t help but melt against her roommate's touch. Something about her was so good, it was better than anything Tayce had ever felt.

If this was what sex was like, she’d never want to go to anyone else.

She wanted to pull A’whora into another kiss but her body had made another decision, her mind clouded only able to focus on the building feeling of irrepressible pleasure.

A’whora felt her building up, speeding herself up and pressing kisses to Tayce’s thighs, suppressing a smirk at how she gasped at the feeling. She removed her fingers slowly, pressing her mouth to her slick cunt. Tayce let out an uncharacteristically high whine as her tongue hit all the right spots. She squirmed against

Tayce let out the sound again, lasting longer as she climaxed, A’whora moved back to her fingers to lull her out of it before crawling up to cuddle Tayce as she laid back, recovering from it all.

“What about you?” Tayce hummed, her tone thick with tiredness. A’whora wanted to laugh at how easily she was wiped out but thought better of it. She was too cute like this, a dopey grin playing on her features as she was still running off the high from her orgasm.

“I’m alright, I just wanted to make you feel good. You don’t know how long I’ve wanted to do that.” A’whora shrugged, her chest warming as Tayce scooted closer to curl into her arms.

“Me too.” The dopey smile returned, Tayce’s words warm with affection in a way that made the blonde’s heart soar.

Tayce didn’t say much more, passing out with her head on A’whora’s chest, held close by her arms. This was it, all she wanted. A’whora savoured the moment before succumbing to her fatigue, smiling as she heard a muffled “gnight Rory” on the brink of consciousness.

#taywhora #rpdr fanfiction #if i had my way i would be yours

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artificialqueens · 3 years

Text

On The Ground (Rosénali) - Moonshot

A/N: So… Guess who is back after a year of not writing fics? Yours truly! What can I say? Rosénali is that powerful of a ship. As always, I hope eveyone enjoys this fic. Feel free to let me know what you think… Who knows, there might be a follow up to this little fluff in the future! Little side note: this is a lesbian au where most of the s13/s12 girls appearing are cis-female, however Mik is still a trans man in the fic.

Summary: The diner girl!Denali x street singer!Rosé AU based on Blackpink’s Rosé’s solo music that nobody asked for!

ao3 link https://archiveofourown.org/works/30267687

Denali stared at the round clock above the entrance of the diner.

4:57 PM.

Three more minutes until her shift was over.

Three more minutes until the girl who had been a fixed character in her dreams would come from around the corner, set up her guitar, greet the passersby before starting her set for the evening like she did every Wednesday.

“So, gorge, are you going to ask the champagne girl out today, or are you just going to keep on creepily staring at her from afar?”, her coworker, Kade - or as everyone called him, Mik - appeared next to her with an empty tray.

“Her name is Rosé, not champagne girl!”, Denali rebutted, “and also, for the record, I don’t just… stare. I just happen to like appreciating her set without bothering her! It’s not like she was flirting with me that one time”.

“Did I just hear our Nali denying her crush on that pink-haired singer, again?”, Olivia, who was busy running the cash register, chimed in.

“Girl, I think we should start betting against her and maybe we’ll make more money than what they can pay us here!”, Mik joked as he washed some of the dishes in the sink.

The black-haired girl rolled her eyes, ignoring her two best friends and focusing on the performer’s much-anticipated arrival.

Denali didn’t believe in love at first sight but after the first time Rosé and her guitar had shown up on the other side of the road from Tamisha’s Diner, she couldn’t think about anything else.

There was just something about the other girl that had the Alaskan girl enamored.

The first - and so far only - time she had talked to Rosé was out of necessity as the other girl and who she assumed were her two best friends - the diner girls had dubbed them ‘Pastel Powerpuff girls’ - had decided to dine in just as Denali’s shift at the register had started.

“Hi! Did you enjoy our diner?”, the skater had put on her best smile, not quite able to meet the gaze of the taller girl as she typed out the receipt.

“Oh, sure, the skating gig is cute, the food’s great, and the service… isn’t too bad either,” Denali could see from the corner of her eye the smirk on the pink-haired girl.

“Rosie! Quit flirting with every cute girl that breathes and hurry up or Jan and I are leaving you here, the Uber is going to be here in 2 minutes!”, the blue-haired girl went on with the other girl in the friend group while ‘Rosie’ rolled her eyes at them.

“Sorry about Lagoona, she has the tact of an elephant on rollerskates,” the taller girl joked.

“O-Oh, no problem. So, your total is 20,04$, will you be paying in cash or card? Also, are you splitting the bill?”

“Since dumb and dumber over there already left, I’ll just pay everything with my card,” she replied taking out her purse and taking out her credit card, “here you go, angel”.

Denali tried her best not to blush at the sudden pet name, maintaining her on-the-clock persona as she brought out the card reader. She quickly finished up the operation and handed the pink-haired girl her card back with the receipt, “I just need a quick signature here and you’re free to go to your friends”.

‘Rosie’ scribbled down her signature - she learned her actual name was Rosé, classy yet slightly worrying - and left a tip for her.

A 10$ tip for her.

“Gorge, she left you a 10$ tip, she was basically asking for your hand in marriage”, Mik reminded her, his eyes darting around the half-empty diner.

He nodded his head to his left where Denali saw another one of her co-workers sharing a milkshake with her girlfriend, giggling like teenagers, “I’m just saying. If Utica managed to end up dating that self-proclaimed ebony enchantress over there, you got a chance with wine girl”, he ended with his trademark L.A vocal fry.

Denali knew Mik had a point, but as she was about to reply, she heard the familiar sound of a guitar starting a new song. Her eyes glanced back at the clock.

5:14 PM

Damn, she had missed the beginning of the set.

The Alaskan girl didn’t lose any more time as she clocked out, skates still on her feet as she zoomed out of the diner.

“Aaaaand she’s gone!”, Olivia commented, turning her head to Mik, “Do you think this time is the good one?”

“Well, if she doesn’t finally go after her, I might as well go after her myself!”

Denali reached the usual crowd that had already formed around Rosé, trying her best to blend in and not be seen by the singer while still getting a good view of the set.

“Well, aren’t you guys a lovely crowd!”, the pink-haired singer smiled as she got ready for the next song, “I’ve got one last song for today and this is going to be the first time I’ll be performing it, so, don’t hate it too much!”, she chuckled as she checked her guitar before turning her head back to the mic stand, “This is On The Ground, I’m Rosé and I hope you’ve enjoyed the set! Feel free to drop your tips in the guitar case!”

Denali couldn’t take her eyes off Rosé when she heard the guitar’s first chord paired with the honey-like vocals.

My life’s been magic seems fantastic

I used to have a hole

in the wall with a mattress

It’s funny when you want it

Suddenly you have it

You find out that your gold’s just plastic

The black-haired girl quickly pulled out her phone, opened her voice memo app, and hit record. She wanted to treasure the magic Rosé’s voice brought.

What she failed to notice while she was so into the song was a pair of hazel eyes settling on her as the song reached its climax.

A couple of days later, Denali had just finished with her teaching job at the local ice rink when she spotted Olivia on the railings.

“The suspicious lack of a certain pink-haired girl makes me think that you still haven’t asked her out” she heard the younger girl say as she skated her way to her.

“You’ll never let it go, won’t you, Liv?”

“Not when I see that you like her and, from what I’ve seen, she is at least interested in you. Mik tried to ask her out yesterday after your shift was over,” the other girl replied.

Denali furrowed her brows, “Wait, he was serious about asking her out? I thought he was just joking!”

“If you don’t act on your cute pink crush, you can’t expect everyone else to stop for you,” Olivia reasoned, “if it’s of any help, Mik did say that, and I quote ‘she didn’t want a piece of this fine ass’”, she finished, air quoting their co-worker.

“To be honest, the dude’s barely got an ass compared to me,” Denali muttered, but her best friend managed to catch it.

“Well, as Symone said, you do have a fat ass,” Olivia commented, causing both of them to laugh out loud.

She continued, “Point still stands though, you gotta do something or you might just end up regretting not doing anything about it”.

The dark-haired girl sighed, “I know, I’m just… scared to get hurt because she seems so cool and unreachable, and I’m just so… me?”, she confessed, resting her arms on the rails.

“Give it a chance, Nali,” Olivia replied, laying her hand on the skater’s arm and giving it a gentle squeeze, “And just in case, if she fucks you over, we’ll just unleash Kandy on her!”, she added, making Denali chuckle.

“Girl, if she knew you said that…”

“She would do absolutely nothing because she’s too busy chasing after that Joey guy”, she didn’t miss a beat with her reply, giving her a knowing look, “Almost forgot to ask, are you coming later to the club with the others?”

Denali shook her head, “No, sorry. I don’t feel like clubbing today, I’ll just skate a bit more and then go home to watch some Netflix”.

Olivia shrugged her shoulders, “You do you, girl. But think about what I said, okay?”

She gave her best friend a small smile, “Thanks, Liv. See you at work?”

The younger girl nodded and left Denali to her thought as she exited the room. The black-haired skater turned her head back to the rink, noticing that only a few people were left on the ice.

She took a deep breath, putting her earbuds back in and looking through her phone to decide on what song to use for her last routine of the day. Her eyes fell on the voice memo app, immediately reminding herself of the recording she had taken just a few days prior. She hadn’t even listened to it since she had recorded it.

It wasn’t a clean recording, she could hear the sounds of the city and the people around her, but she closed her eyes and focused on Rosé’s voice, letting it guide her.

The music fully took her over as she performed her usual stunts.

I’m way up in the clouds

And they say I’ve made it now

But I figured it out

Everything I need is on the ground

She found herself in the center of the rink, the bridge of the song was blasting in her ears. She smiled to herself as she started to spin, gradually picking up speed while Rosé’s high notes were all she could focus on.

Just drove by your house

So far from you now

But I figured it out

Everything I need is on the

Everything I need is on the ground

The recording stopped abruptly, she remembered how she had to bolt away, almost missing her bus home.

Denali could hear her heavy breathing, suddenly aware again that she wasn’t alone. But she had made up her mind.

She was going to talk to Rosé the following Wednesday.

That Wednesday the diner was busier than usual, giving Denali barely a moment to think, let alone realize she was missing Rosé’s set outside.

She glanced at the clock.

5:26 PM

Shit.

She turned her head and looked outside the diner’s big windows and saw that the pink-haired girl was starting to gather her things.

“Miss Iman just left, go to her! We’ll cover for you and we are not letting you get back in unless you got a date!”, Olivia said quietly enough for just her to hear.

Denali couldn’t help the grin spreading across her face. She grabbed some of the tips that she had made before she bolted outside, faintly hearing the cheering of her friends.

As she reached Rosé on the other side of the road, the singer’s back was facing her, she didn’t seem to have noticed Denali yet.

The black-haired girl took a deep breath, just like she had done on the ice rink, and let the tips fall into the still open guitar case.

The noise of falling change was what made Rosé turn around, a surprised look on her face as she registered Denali’s face.

“Denali?”

Gosh, she could hear the other girl say her name all day.

Wait.

“How do you know my name?”, Denali asked slightly confused.

Rosé didn’t reply but simply pointed at the waitress’s chest.

Oh, right. The nameplate on her uniform.

“That and also I tend to remember a pretty face when I see one,” she added, now her attention fully on the shorter girl.

“Oh, yeah, right”, she fidgeted awkwardly, not knowing where to look, “Uhm, I just wanted to say that you have a really beautiful voice. You can consider me your first fan when you make it big”.

Rosé smiled at her and Denali couldn’t help but notice how beautiful of a smile she had.

The singer turned back to her stuff, shuffling things around and leaving the brunette to her thoughts. She wanted to ask the taller girl out but felt all her courage leave her body.

Way to go, Nali.

“Well, Uhm, I think I should-”, she started but she was stopped by the pink-haired girl, who had finished packing everything up.

“Here, this is for you”.

It was a jewel case cd, a picture of Rosé in a very 80s inspired attire on the cover with pink marker writing across the front.

‘To Denali

My first (and hopefully not last) fan

Rosé xo’

It was signed with a small rose doodle next to Rosé’s name and, much to Denali’s surprise, a phone number along with the phrase ‘put it to good use’.

She looked up to find the other girl staring at her, her guitar case strapped on her back. She gave her a wink and started walking towards the subway.

Denali stood there for what felt like forever as she watched Rosé disappear in between the crowd of people roaming the streets.

She looked back down at the cd, committing the number to memory. She turned around to look at the back, her eyes were drawn to the tracklist.

She smiled when she saw On The Ground.

Finally, she didn’t have to listen to a shitty phone recording to enjoy it.

“Wait, what? You had recorded it all secretly and shady, mama?”

Rosé’s laugh filled the room as Denali tried to hide her face on the other girl’s bare chest.

“You’re an ass! I just wanted to use it for one of my skating routines”, she muttered, causing her girlfriend to laugh even harder.

“I find it cute that I’m not even famous and my music has already been pirated!” she commented, “I’m already halfway there to stardom, baby girl,” she added, kissing the top of Denali’s head.

The shorter girl groaned as she hid the increasing blush on her cheeks, rolling her body so that she was on top of the pink-haired girl.

“Well, miss Rosé, is it pirating if it was for personal pleasure only?”, Denali teased, running her hands upwards on the naked skin, slowly lowering herself until her face was inches away from her girlfriend’s.

She felt Rosé’s hands take a firm hold of her behind, “Oh angel, I’ll show you personal pleasure,” the singer replied, eliminating the little space left between their lips as Denali brought her hands to cup the older girl’s face.

Rethinking about those lyrics Rosé had written months prior, Denali knew she was right, she did have everything she needed on the ground.

It was to be right there with Rosé.

#rpdr fanfiction #denali foxx #rosé #olivia lux #gottmik #rosnali #fluff #lesbian au #diner au #s13 #moonshot #submission

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solitvdcs · 3 years

Text

* kathryn newton, cis female + she/her | you know zoey simon-archer, right? they’re twenty-three, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, eight years? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to a little wicked by valerie broussard like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole black clothes and black coffee, dark under eye circles barely covered with concealer, might put a hex on you thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is august 10, so they’re a leo, which is unsurprising, all things considered.

TRIGGER WARNING: CHILD ABANDONMENT

basic info

full name: zoey tallulah simon-archer

birth date: august 10, 1997

pronouns: she/her

hometown: boston, massachusetts

sexuality: bisexual

height: 5’1”

eye color: blue

hair color: blonde

build: slim

tattoos: one of her younger siblings doodled on her arm and she said ok i see u and made it permanent

piercings: basically every piercing you can get on your ears split between both (no piercing is in the same spot except maybe the earlobes, she thrives on the chaos), septum

style: if it’s black and shapeless then yes

favorite color: black

favorite food: whatever she can find in the house while scavenging at 3am

zodiac: leo sun, scorpio moon, capricorn rising

mbti: istp

hogwarts house: ravenclaw

enneagram: type 4 wing 5

temperament: choleric/sanguine

alignment: chaotic neutral

bio bullet points

CHILD ABANDONEMENT TW it’s unclear how zoey came into this world, but what we do know is that she was dropped off on the doorstep of a fire station before her birth mom disappeared into the night. no note, no keepsakes, just two week old zoey wrapped in a nondescript blanket that was probably the one the hospital wrapped her in. the rest of her childhood was a blur of failed adoptions and shitty foster homes across the country (east coast especially), leaving her with no ability to fully connect with anyone and, okay, maybe a mild anger problem. rage blackouts weren’t uncommon, but in one foster home they had an old nintendo 64 and she learned to channel her anger through video games instead END TW

along came the archers, a lesbian couple that already had twelve other children. zoey was fifteen already and had fully expected to age out of the system and end up another statistic. for a good year after the adoption was finalized, zoey still didn’t trust that they wouldn’t send her back, so she acted out. she wanted to give them an excuse and get it over with, but her tactics went unnoticed in a cheaper by the dozen-esque household. her new moms couldn’t give her the attention she craved with so many bodies, but her older siblings stepped up and tried to make her comfortable. it sort of worked, but being smack dab in the middle of so many kids meant she faded into the background more often than not

at school, she thrived without trying, a natural aptitude for math and science and mechanics landing her a place on the robotics team, but because her many siblings had already made names for themselves, the archer name was almost like a curse for her. she didn’t want to be known as another archer adoptee, so she went by the name she’d carried with her from birth: simon. zoey simon could be her own person, whoever the fuck that was

one day, the robotics coach brought in their old computer for anyone who wanted to tinker around with it, and wanting an excuse to stay out as long as possible, zoey jumped on the opportunity. over the course of the semester (with the coach’s guidance) she took apart and put it back together again, upgrading it with some donated parts from a local electronics store. the best part? coach let her keep the computer after she was done

obligatory at some point she cheated on frankie with both sutter and ziggy ✌️😗

anyway we’re onto college, where she got hella scholarships and grants for being a girlboss and ended up at university of michigan, studying mechanical engineering. money was still tight, though, so she spent her first year trying to balance studies and a part time job at the local superstore, but her mental health and grades started suffering to the point that she almost lost her scholarships for her second semester. Between semesters, over a night of video games with her roommate, she offhandedly suggested zoey start live streaming her playthroughs. it may not make all that much, but a few viewers and subs would be better than nothing

but oh boy did she do better than a few viewers and subs

using a digital rendering of a random avatar and a voice modulator, psychozomatic was born, and they blew up. popular streamers started inviting her to their servers, and she made enough to cover all of her extra costs and then some — she graduated summa cum laude because of streaming, but she couldn’t stop after graduation; she was doing something she loved and getting paid for it. that’s what people always hoped for in a job, right? so after graduation, she fabricated a job to her friends and family to explain the income, moved into her own apartment with a soundproofed second bedroom (that she kept under lock and key for whenever anyone came over) and kept up the facade. it’s been five years and nobody even knows she’s a girl — female streamers get so much shit, she’s not sure she ever wants to do a face reveal. she’s perfectly content for the time being having everyone think “zo” stands for “lorenzo” or “vincenzo” or whatever, and being a faceless streamer means she gets the weird blend of notoriety and anonymity that she craved her whole life

personality wise, zoey is a mash-up of deadpan humor and snark. she’s never been good at face-to-face communication, which is why streaming works so well for her. she’s never known how to flirt and has been known to tie someone’s shoelaces together in an attempt to get their attention, which has obviously not worked out for her. once showed a person she thought was cute the computer she built and well...they were impressed but nothing came out of it. she’s probably a lost cause, but she can just play a dating simulator if she’s that lonely

is big on first person shooter games — the main reason she keeps her identity hidden, because people get nasty in those lobbies. also absolutely loves horror games, currently doing a playthrough of resident evil village on her stream

wanted connections

fans of her stream !!! obviously they wouldn’t know it’s her but it’ll still give her a lil smile and maybe even a blush if she hears someone talking about “zo”

other gamers she’s played with ???

people she met in the foster system

someone who has a crush on her and she has no idea bc she can’t read people (and vice versa)

friends of her siblings that had no idea she was one of them (i’m mean to her bt i think it wld be funny)

i’ve been working on this intro for like a week this is all i got pls take it and run <3

#irvingintro #u would think for how long i've been working on this it wld be longer but no <3 #anyway enjoy xoxoxoxo

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emiefaunwrites · 3 years

Note

Hi again! I couldn’t stop thinking about Taka being in a Les Misrables play in college and I just gotta know how it went! I wonder if he had bonded with his fellow club members during practice to the point where they crack inside jokes together and laugh along with each other over a blooper they found funny during practice. Maybe once the show is over, they all get emotional over the club members being in their final term of college (since it would be their last show). I remember back when I was in my high school drama club, we would all go out to dinner the weekend after the showtimes to celebrate. Maybe Taka and the rest of the club could do something like that! (Taka would invite Leon of course. And maybe Kaede, Maki and Kirumi if they went to his college lol).

Heyyy!

Oh hell yeah! Les Mis would have been his final Uni performance for sure! As big as Hope's Peak was, I don't think they'd have enough students (what with the canon reserve course being...well...not that important lets say...). And ya gotta have a lot of people for Les Mis!

I'm not sure many of his Hope's Peak friends (emphasis on friends) would have gone to the same Uni as him - apart from Leon obviously. But I said in a previous post that Mondo's around, so he would definitely go.

Anyway! Enough procrastinating! Let's get writing! Slipped in some jealousy too so hope you don't mind? Thank you as always for the ask and I hope you enjoy!

*********************

• Seeing as he enjoyed the theatre club in Hope's Peak, Taka naturally gets involved in something similar in Uni.

• Leon is hoping to join too, seeing as he got involved in one of the final shows back at school, but baseball practice falls on the same days and so he just can't make it.

• That's not to say he doesn't go to see every show - both the opening night and the closing night without fail.

• And boy, does Taka still shine.

• He doesn't always get big roles now, which suits him just fine seeing as the clubs put on shows much more regularly with the amount of students involved.

• But he still manages to bag a few decent roles - Jesus in Jesus Christ Superstar and Dr Frank N Furter in Rocky Horror Picture show being Leon's particular favourites (for totally different reasons...)

• But Taka's crowning moment was also to be his final stage performance.

• Javert in Les Mis.

• He'd been listening to Stars ever since starting on the stage and told himself that Javery would be the last character he ever played.

• And of course, he was instantly cast in the role.

• He put his absolute EVERYTHING into it, making sure to go out with a bang.

• Each of the five performances went incredibly and on his final night, while taking a bow, he couldn't help but cry.

• He's built such great bonds with this group. And although they still have two more shows, he knows its the end for him.

• The club is all super emotional when he tells them backstage and immediately insist on sending him off with a bang.

• Leon and Mondo, who are waiting for him, are invited along - even though they know practically no one there.

• And oh boy, is it weird.

• Its not that they're annoyed at how popular Taka is with this group of people.

• On the contrary - its lovely to see the boy finally enjoying life outside of their company.

• But there's SO MANY in jokes - stuff they'll never find as funny as everyone else.

• No matter how hard Taka tries to explain it to them when he gets two seconds to speak to them.

• Mondo's just glad he has Leon there to talk to and so's pretty chill with the whole thing.

• Leon, though, is suffering with his irrational jealousy again.

• Of course he wants Taka to succeed and have friends and be happy. Of COURSE he wants that.

• But he can't help but worry about the girl Taka had to kiss on stage when he was J.D in Heathers the Musical.

• She's practically fawning over him and she's batting her lashes at him and he KEEPS PICTURING THAT SCENE and Leon just...just...

• He needs to just calm himself down and let Taka enjoy his moment.

• He needs to stop being so damn hypocritical about stage kissing.

• It's acting! Pretend! Make believe!

• It's not like Taka CHEATED on him.

• And hey, Taka is ENTITLED to stage kiss. God knows Leon's kissed plenty of people in the past. It isn't like Leon's ANNOYED and JEALOUS that he isn't Taka's only kiss anymore...

• Ugh. He needs air.

• He excuses himself and Mondo and they head out, Mondo lighting up and Leon DESPERATELY wanting to.

• Mondo knows better than to bother him so they stand in silence.

• Until Taka comes out, and Mondo slips back inside.

• 'You okay?'

• 'Yeah, I'm fine.'

• Lies. Sweet sweet lies. And Taka knows it.

• And eventually Leon slips and says he'd better go back because...

• 'SHE'LL be waiting?'

• 'Who?'

• 'The girl that's been all over you all night.'

• Ah. Okay, now Taka gets it.

• Leon's jealous of his co-star. The one he had to kiss. And ironically, he has no idea that he's jealous of a lesbian.

• He smiles and takes Leon's hands, pulling him in close.

• 'You know one of our favourite in jokes?'

• 'Hmm.'

• 'Whenever we had to practice our...scene...we both took ages getting into that moment. You know how we did it?'

• 'No.'

• 'We both had to pretend the other was our partner. Yui pictured Niko. And I pictured you.'

• Ahhh damn it. Leon KNEW he was overreacting.

• 'Sorry.'

• 'Don't be. But don't ever forget...offstage, I'm all yours.'

• After that, the party is much more enjoyable!

#kiyotaka ishimaru #leon kuwata #ishileon #mondo oowada #ask request #yaysof11037

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gamergirl929 · 4 years

Text

You’re Trying To Kill Me, Aren’t You? (Alex Morgan x Reader)

@heathtobination Request: Alex x reader where Alex is a major tease because she knows reader is into her

“Holy fuck.” You mumble, the water you were spraying into your mouth completely missing in favor of spraying on Sonnett.

“Y/N! Jesus!” She grabs your water, pulling it away from you, realizing what exactly had caused you to fall into a trance.

Alex Morgan of course, who’s making a show of wiping her face, her flat stomach and prominent muscles on display as her blue orbs watch you intently.

“She won’t be happy until you’re a lesbian puddle on the floor will she?” Sonnett asks, just as the woman who was cleaning her face with her shirt decides to completely forgo her shirt, and is now not only spray the water from her bottle on her face but on her abs as well.

“What the fuck.” You say, loudly and Sonnett barks out a laugh that draws everyone’s attention. Everyone’s except Alex’s because her blue orbs were already on you.

Sonnett, who you now realize is wiping tears off her face shakes her head.

“You are so fucked Y/N, so fucked.”

You take a deep breath, only able to nod.

“I know.”

At the same time, Alex sends you a wink and your breath hitches.

“And I don’t know if I’d have it any other way.”

***

“Oh, sorry I didn’t know you were in here.” Alex says, voice husky as she moves across the room in nothing but a towel.

You turn your back on the woman, cheeks blood red.

“I-It’s okay.”

You shiver when you hear the towel drop to the floor, the tips of your ears burning as your eyes slam shut.

You hear Alex make her way towards you, swallowing hard when you feel her hot breath on your ear.

“Sorry about that.” She purrs and you clear your throat.

“No-No pr-problem.”

“You okay? You sound nervous.” She asks and you shrug, laughing nervously.

“Me? N-No, I’m fine.”

Suddenly, Alex comes into view and you realize she’s still completely bare.

“That’s good.” She says as she slips into the bathroom, shutting the door behind you.

You fall back onto the bed with a lengthy and extremely loud groan.

“Kill me now.”

***

You turn around, leaning your forehead against the gym’s wall as Alex does some squats in front of you, her back to you as she works the muscles in her ass, the short shorts she’s wearing making your mouth go dry.

“’Let’s go to the gym’ she says, ‘I need a spotter’ she says.” You mumble rushing to grab a number of heavy weights to lift.

“Y/N? Can you come spot me?” She asks and you clear your throat, dropping the weights and moving to stand beside Alex, Alex who is looking straight into the mirror in front of her, her blue orbs locked on you.

Slowly, she squats down, grunting from the weight on her shoulders, letting out a moan when she stands back up. She does this a number of times before she places the weight down, backing up against you, her back against your front.

“Thanks Y/N.” She whispers, rubbing against your front, your body trembling. “I can always count on you.” She swivels her hips and you abruptly step back when the gym door swings open.

Alex sends you a wink through the gym’s mirror and you shake your head, swallowing hard.

“Jesus, fuck.”

***

Alex teasing hadn’t ceased, the fleeting touches, the sultry and charming smiles she’d send your way while blatantly checking you out.

The longer it went on though, the more you began to realize that the teasing was just to get a rise out of you rather than leading up to anything else, that anything else being a relationship with Alex Morgan, you began to distance yourself from the forward.

Alex sighs sadly as she watches you talk to Christen Press and Tobin Heath across field, the two brunette’s grinning.

“You know, she wouldn’t be shying away from you if you weren’t acting like a dick.”

Alex turns, glaring at her best friend and defender Kelley O’Hara.

“I’m not acting like a dick.” She mumbles and Kelley scoffs.

“Dude, you know she cares about you, and you were just fucking with her to get a rise out of her? Seriously? You don’t think that’s a dick move?” Kelley snorts humorlessly. “Morgan, that’s an incredibly dicky move.”

Alex shakes her head.

“Shut up.” She mumbles, having no other argument, to what the woman had said.

She had toyed with you.

She had flirted with you with no real intent of moving forward in a relationship with you.

She’d treated you as eye candy, reveling in the way your body would shudder when she’d tease you.

“Do you even like her?” Kelley asks and Alex shrugs.

“I don’t know.”

Kelley sighs, patting her back.

“Well, if you do, you fucked this up Alex, big time.”

***

Alex frowns when she realizes instead of rooming with you, she’s rooming with Kelley, the former roommate of Christen Press, and by extension, Tobin Heath considering the two were stuck together like glue.

Alex looks at the defender, Kelley giving her a frown.

“She requested a switch.” Kelley says as she flops down onto the empty bed. “And I think she deserved it, at least for now.” Kelley frowns.

Alex nods, her chin resting on her hands, which are joined by her intertwined fingers.

“I know she did.”

Alex slowly nods, heart clenching in her chest when she thinks about how she must have made you feel.

Alex closes her eyes, hanging her head.

“What have I done...?”

***

“She didn’t feel anything for me, did she?” You mumble, Christen and Tobin wrapping their arms around you.

“I can’t tell you how she feels, but what she did was wrong Y/N...” Christen whispers Tobin nodding, agreeing.

“Really wrong, no one should use you like that, not when they know how you feel.” She says sadly, leaning her head against yours.

You close your eyes, releasing a trembling breath as a tear runs down your cheek.

“Is it wrong that I still...” You swallow hard, Christen’s nod telling you to continue. “Is it wrong to still have feelings for her?” You ask, voice cracking and Tobin shakes her head.

“No, no it’s not.”

***

Alex Morgan had indeed, fucked up. She’d toyed with your feelings, teasing you to the point of proverbial torture before you eventually put distance between the two of you, becoming tired of the said torture from the woman you cared for, the woman who KNEW you cared for her.

She’d tried, ultimately failing to catch your gaze, you, obviously, were avoiding her and she didn’t blame you.

The distance between you two, though short, felt like miles apart.

Needless to say, your teammates had quickly found out what was going on, and Alex Morgan was currently enemy number one.

She didn’t blame them, she didn’t blame you.

She was wrong, she’d toyed with your feelings, but deep down Alex knew, and they say, absence makes the heart go fonder, well it had, because Alex Morgan wanted more than just the teasing she had done.

She’d always felt her heart skip a beat when you smiled, or when you laughed, felt an ache in her core when you’d react to her teasing, your eyes falling shut as you shivered.

Kelley pulls the woman out of her trance, slapping her on the back.

“If you want to make things right, maybe you should talk to her?” She suggests and Alex shakes her head.

“She won’t listen to anything I have to say, why should she?” She frowns and Kelley takes a deep breath.

“Because she loves you stupid, don’t fuck it up again.”

Alex watches Kelley go with an arched brow.

“Yeah right.” She mumbles turning away, just catching you turning away from her.

The forward smiles softly.

“Maybe she’s right after all.”

***

Alex had tried, failing each and every time to get to you and when she got close a proverbial Pitbull stepped in her way, that Pitbull being Christen Press.

A hard knock on her hotel room door had her and Kelley both jumping the defender looking at the forward.

“I think we can both guess who that is, I hope you’re ready.” Kelley moves to her feet, patting Alex on the shoulder before she moves to the door, opening it to reveal not only Christen but Tobin as well.

“I’ll give you guys the room.” She slips passed them, Christen and Tobin quick to slip in after her, shutting the door behind them.

“What the hell are you playing at?” Christen snarls the second her green orbs lock with Alex’s blues.

“Let me explain-

“No!” Christen barks. “You fucked up Alex Morgan, you fucked up and broke Y/N’s heart.” She roars, Tobin placing a hand on her shoulder to calm her down.

“Why won’t you leave her alone?” Tobin asks, calmly and Alex closes her eyes.

“I know what I did was wrong...”

Christen scoffs.

“Yeah, no shit.”

“I-I care about her.” Alex frowns, hanging her head, unable to look at the two women in the room, the two women who share a glance.

“No, you don’t, or you wouldn’t have done to her what you did, lead her on.” Christen throws her hands in the air angrily.

“I know, okay? I know.” Alex covers her face with her hands. “I thought I didn’t care about her...”

Christen opens her mouth but Tobin gives her shoulder a squeeze, making the woman’s mouth snap shut.

“I didn’t think I did, but... Being without her...” Alex shakes her head, picking her head up to reveal her red rimmed blue orbs. “I was, I was using her crush on me to tease her...” She mumbles, Christen and Tobin remaining silent as they listen. “I thought I didn’t care for her, but... But I did, I do and I just want to make this right...” She hands her head, her eyes slammed shut as she waits for Christen and Tobin’s reactions.

The two forward share a glance Christen’s eyes narrowed, whereas Tobin is relatively calm, which of course, is far from surprising.

“Why should be let you anywhere NEAR her?” Tobin asks, Alex again picking up her head to reveal the tears streaming down her cheeks.

“If she doesn’t want me that’s fine, she deserves an apology at least...” She mumbles, Christen and Tobin sharing another glance, both nodding.

“Fine.” Christen growls. “If you hurt her again, I’ll personally stomp you into the ground.”

Christen flips around, stomping out of the room, leaving Tobin behind, the woman turning back to Alex.

“I won’t stomp you into the ground, but I’ll watch Christen do it.”

“I believe it... I won’t hurt her again, I’ll promise.”

***

It’s days later when Alex finally gets the opportunity to talk to you, her blue orbs locking with wary Y/E/C orbs.

“What do you want?” You whisper under your breath, Alex frowning as she takes a step towards.

“To say I’m sorry... You-You didn’t deserve what I did to you and...”

You scoff.

“There, you said you’re sorry, that’s all right?”

You go to slip passed Alex, the woman quickly turning to grab your wrist, stopping you from leaving, her hold gentle on your wrist, noting that tenderness, you turn around to face her.

You nod, silently giving her the go ahead to speak and she does.

“I’m so sorry... I knew how you felt about me, and I used that, I toyed with you and I’m so fucking sorry, I can never ever get back that trust again, and if you don’t even want to speak to me again, I get it. I do, but I just need you to know that I’m sorry and I-

Alex stops to catch her breath, letting out an unintentional sob she tries to cover up with a cough, but it doesn’t go by missed, not to you.

“I know... This isn’t the right time...” Alex shuffles nervously something you’re not used to seeing from the woman whose blue orbs will no longer meet yours.

“I thought I didn’t care about you.” She whispers and your stomach clenches tightly.

“You thought...?” You mumble under your breath, Alex nodding.

“I thought I didn’t, but I miss you...” She mumbles, a sudden tear leaking from her glassy blue eyes.

“I... I didn’t realize it then, but I realize now that when I was...”

Alex takes a deep breath.

“When I was teasing you I felt something too.”

She frowns.

“It was just a game for me, at least that’s what I thought... But now...”

Alex shakes her head.

“Now I know that I felt...” Alex shakes her head. “Feel the same way.”

Your eyes widen, tears leaking from your eyes, running down your own cheeks.

“Alex I-

A sudden throat being cleared pulls your attention away from one another, the both of you ridding your cheeks of tears before turning to face Christen and Tobin.

“We need to get ready for the game.” Christen says curtly, green eyes narrowed as they dart between the two of you.

“Thanks Chris.” You nod, the woman humming as she places a hand on your shoulder.

“Everything okay?” She asks and you nod, turning to Alex.

“Still remains to be seen...”

***

Alex Morgan, was furious, more than furious.

Watching you get fouled again and again made her blood boil, and ever still, no fouls were getting called.

It was when you let out a cry, falling and remaining on the ground that Alex snapped, marching right up to the Canadian player, Chapman that had fouled you nearly the entire second half.

“What the FUCK is your problem?” She snarls, giving the woman a rough shove.

“What does it mean to you Morgan?” She shoves her back, the forward snarling.

“You put your hands on her again and I’ll beat the shit out of you myself.” She snarls, the two now nose to nose.

“Oh, I get it, you’re into her, aren’t you?” She scoffs. “I mean at least she has someone to take care of her after the game...” She shrugs.

You watch with wide eyes as Alex lands a solid punch on the woman’s right cheek, knocking the woman off her feet.

Your teammates are quick to grab the angry forward who tries to get out of their grasp, while the Canadians check on their fallen comrade.

“Fucking BITCH.” Alex spits, still trying to get out of her teammate’s hold.

“Alex.” You wince, the woman stilling when she realizes you’re attempting to get to your feet.

“No, don’t get up.” She frowns, your teammates letting her go so she can check on you.

“It’s okay.” Alex whispers, cupping your cheek. “You’re okay.”

The ref eventually makes her way over, unsurprisingly giving Alex a red card that sends her off the field for the remainder of the game.

Reluctantly, she moves off field, slipping passed Vlatko without a single word as she moves to the locker room.

Luckily for you, Vlatko uses his last sub to sub you out, knowing you can continue the game, but also knowing not only that you need to rest your leg, but also that you have a very important conversation to have with a certain forward you both know.

***

You limp into the locker room with a grimace, your teeth clenched.

“Al?” You call out, almost immediately the forward is on you, wrapping her arms around you.

“Are you okay?” She asks, holding you tightly and you nod.

“I’m fine, but what about you?” You ask, Alex sighing as she holds up her bruised knuckles.

“Nothing ice won’t fix.” She shrugs.

The two of you take a seat on a nearby bench, both silent, though you feel a sense of loss when Alex leaves the bench, coming back seconds later with a bag of ice.

“Sit still.” She whispers, kneeling down in front of you to tenderly place the bag of ice on your injured ankle.

You watch the woman dote over you, gently removing the cleated shoe from your foot before ever so gently lifting your leg up and onto the bench, sitting down and resting it in her lap as she examines the bruising skin.

“I should’ve hit her harder.” Alex snarls when she sees the cleat mark like bruises on your leg, her fingertips gently running along them.

The touch you feel is unlike, like the fleeting touches Alex had given when teasing you, a hint of something familiar, but something entirely brand new, something that felt almost like a new beginning, a new piece of Alex Morgan’s heart exposed to you.

“We need to talk.” You whisper, Alex’s blue eyes widening as they jump up to lock with your Y/E/C orbs.

“Okay...” She swallows hard, nodding.

“But not here.” You finish, the woman closing her eyes.

“Okay, wherever you want.”

“The hotel, I’ll meet you in your...” You pause, causing Alex’s brows to furrow.

“Our room.” You finish, the forward’s lips splitting into a wide grin.

She nods.

“Okay. I... I’ll be there.” She says, blushing and you snicker.

“Well I hope so, I mean it’s our room...” You jest, Alex rolling her eyes.

“Shut up.”

***

Alex paces the room nervously, thankfully Kelley had made a quick exit when Alex told her you were coming back to your room, the defender happy that the two of you were going to FINALLY talk about the very large, rainbow colored elephant in the room.

The door slowly creaks open and she flips around, smiling when you limp through the door.

“Careful.” She whispers when you make your way into the room, forgoing sitting on the bed in favor of making your way towards her.

“Sit.” You command, Alex’s blue orbs widening before she complies, plopping right down on the end of the bed, blue orbs looking up at you.

You still, your eyes locking with her shining azure orbs.

To your own surprise, and Alex’s you advance on her, leaning down to press a tender kiss to her lips.

The woman stills blue eyes wide.

Eventually, she pulls herself out of her trance enough to kiss back, her lips pressing softly against yours before you abruptly pull back, Alex already missing the gentle caress of your lips against hers.

“We still need to talk but I just... I had to do that.” You shake your head, grinning, a grin Alex is more than happy to return.

“I can’t say I’m complaining.” She shrugs and you chuckle.

You sit beside her on the end of the bed sighing deeply before you turn to her with a small smile.

“I want this with you Al... I want you, but I’m scared...” You intertwine your fingers together, your chin resting on top of your joined hands.

Alex swallows hard, turning away, her throat tightening.

“I can’t take it if you hurt me again...” You whisper, sniffling, causing Alex to abruptly turn back to you just as the first of your tears start to fall.

“Come here.” Alex shuffles up the bed, towards the headboard, a hand held out to you.

The forward grins brightly when you take it, a tear slipping down her own cheek.

The second she’s able to, Alex’s arms slip around you, the woman burying her nose in your hair.

“I can’t promise there won’t be time where the two of us don’t have disagreements, but I’ll NEVER hurt you like that again... Never I...” Alex swallows hard, taking a deep breath.

Ever so gently, you cup Alex’s cheeks, turning her head until your eyes lock. It’s with her eye locked with yours that the woman finally finds the courage to say what she’d been denying for so long.

“I love you.”

Your eyes widen, your breath hitching.

Your Y/E/C orbs dart around her face, searching for any sign of doubt in the woman’s shining blue orbs.

You find none.

You shake your head, sniffling as tears run down your cheeks, tears she’s quick to swipe away.

“I love you too.”

Alex grins, leaning forwards, closing the distance between the two of you, your lips meeting in a gentle, passionate kiss.

The two of you part and your grin, pecking her lips once more.

“You know, when you’re not acting like a fuckboy, you’re actually pretty sweet.” You tease, Alex’s cheeks flushing.

“I can’t tell you how sorry I am Y/N...” She whispers as you gently caress her cheeks.

“I know. I know you are, just give me time...” You whisper, the forward nodding.

“You can have all the time you need, I just hope you’re okay with me being by your side...”

“I am, I want it more than anything.”

#uswnt x reader #uswnt imagine #alex morgan x reader #alex morgan imagine

536 notes · View notes

cycwrites · 3 years

Text

Switching Gears Part 10 - Family

Here it finally is, the last chapter. I don't know if I would've finished this without the support of a lot of people, @tiny-maus-boots and @kimmania being at the top of that list.

Thank you to everyone who has taken this journey with me. I love you all and hope you enjoyed the ride! (Ha, dirty.)

Staubrey with side Bechloe.

Words: 5,500ish

Rating: No smut in this one - does that make it Teen+?

AO3 FFN Tumblr Master Post

-----

Family

~S~

“Did I hear Chloe correctly this morning? You’re all going to be moving in together?” Emily threw popcorn towards Stacie’s mouth and gave a fist bump when it made it in. “Because I actually think that would be awesome.”

“No, you did not.” Stacie said once she finished chewing. “You overheard the end of a conversation about another conversation Aubrey and I had last night while naked and distracted.”

She was feeling very content, very playful and extremely relaxed after spending a few more hours naked with Aubrey after her last class. Not to say she didn’t want to drag Aubrey off into her bedroom for round whatever count they were up to, but she could wait until the rest were gone tomorrow.

Maybe.

“Oh my god. Gross!” Emily slammed her hands over her ears and squeezed her eyes shut, hunching down into the armchair. “Why did you have to say that?”

“You asked,” Chloe said as she came walked into Stacie’s living room with the stack of pizza boxes that had just been delivered and set them in the middle of the coffee table. “Of course she’s going to answer. Oops, we need plates and napkins.” She turned to the kitchen.

“Because I didn’t know the context! I wouldn’t have asked if I had!” Emily complained to Chloe’s retreating back, setting the popcorn bowl on the table as well. “I could’ve lived without the context.” She picked up another piece of popcorn and threw it at Stacie. “You are a terrible cousin.”

Beca was walking back from the bathroom as it arced overhead and she snagged it out of the air and popped it into her mouth. Just as neatly, Stacie’s arms reached out and yanked Beca down to sprawl across her lap.

“Hey!” Beca flailed for a second before realizing she wasn’t falling anymore. “I am not Aubrey, why are you cuddling me?”

“You were there and stole my popcorn.” Stacie shrugged, not knowing what spurred her impulse but happy with the outcome. Beca’s head drew back and she stared at her, wide eyed and Stacie’s lips twitched in amusement.

“Even if it weren’t already chewed and swallowed, I would not be giving you back the popcorn from my mouth!” She blinked at her and then at Aubrey when she pulled Beca’s legs into her lap where she was seated on Stacie’s right. “Seriously?” But she didn’t get up and that acceptance made Stacie happy.

“You three look adorable, by the way. The real question is,” Chloe asked as she rejoined them with a stack of paper plates and a roll of paper towels. “Would you have tried to hand it back to her or let her come after it herself - without using her hands?” She set them down on the table before sitting cross-legged on the floor next to it in front of the empty spot on the couch where Beca had originally been sitting. “And can Aubrey and I watch.”

“Why did I agree to this?” Emily groaned and dropped her head into her hands. “I knew not a single one of you would behave. Each of you individually are worse than the sum of all the sex crazed teens in my high school and now that your powers are combined you’re unstoppable.”

“I wouldn’t say we’ve combined yet,” Chloe said and then, in the same breath, “Here’s some pizza, Em.”

Sighing Emily dropped her hands and took the offered plate. “I am still totally leaving after the movie, by the way. I am not staying the night in the hormone hotel.”

“But you’ll miss out on Aubrey’s French toast in the morning!” Beca rubbed her belly. “No one should ever turn that down.”

“It’ll be okay, Em. You and I can share Stacie’s bed, Stacie can have the couch and Beca and Aubrey can have the spare room,” Chloe said, handing a loaded plate to Aubrey.

“Why do I get the couch?” Stacie pouted, squeezing Beca like she was a stuffed animal.

“Because it’s your house, Bucky, and we’re the guests.” Beca patted her arms then reached for the plate that Chloe was holding out. Chloe caught Stacie’s eye and winked in amused affection as she looked up at the two of them. “It’s only polite.”

Bemused, Stacie pushed her lip out in a pout. “But why can’t I share my own bed with Emily and Chloe? We’ve done that plenty of times.”

“So Aubrey can sneak out and share the couch with you, obviously.” Beca paused with a slice of pizza halfway to her mouth as she realized they were watching her. “Why are all of you staring at me?”

“Because we’re wondering how long it’s going to take you to realize you’re still in Stacie’s lap,” Aubrey told her sweetly.

“I’m what?” Beca looked down as the rest of them burst into laughter. “Holy shit. Why… how… the fuck?”

“Because she’s comfy to snuggle with,” Emily told her, beaming. “She used to hold me when I was sick and sing to me. It’s the only time I felt better until it had passed.” She sighed mournfully. “I really missed that when she moved.”

“Okay that… is adorably cute,” Beca pointed at her. “And you’re not wrong about the comfy. But I am not eating pizza in your lap. Can I have my legs back, Aubrey?”

“I suppose,” Aubrey sighed dramatically and lifted her arms as Beca set her plate on the table.

Stacie helped Beca out of her lap and to her feet, swatting her rear since it was right there and she was never one to pass up opportunity. Beca spun around to glare at her, giving Aubrey the chance to reach out and pinch her while Chloe ran a hand up the inside of her thigh. Beca yelped and jumped backward, thankfully missing the coffee table though only by mere inches.

“I hate all of you.” She went the long way around the table. “Except Emily. She hasn’t assaulted my person.” She took her seat next to Aubrey and shoulder bumped her. “Can you hand me my plate babe?”

As Aubrey leaned over to get it she shared a smile with Stacie. “She loves me.”

“I know I do,” Stacie said softly, tucking a strand of Aubrey’s hair behind her ear as she handed Beca’s plate to her.

“Yeah?” Aubrey turned back to her with a shy smile. The rest of the conversation swirled around them but Stacie ignored it for the moment as Aubrey leaned back toward her. “Then you won’t mind if I sneak out to the couch to make out in the middle of the night?”

Stacie tilted her head and leaned forward the extra inch to slide their lips together. “I’d be disappointed if you didn’t.” She hummed as several throats cleared around them. “I think we’ve got an audience again.”

Aubrey shrugged. “I’m getting used to it.” She sat back up and they both ignored the grins they were getting.

Chloe had settled against Beca’s legs and gave Stacie a quick wink. “Okay, but Emily does have a point.”

“That you’re all too horny for my mental state?” Emily stuck her tongue out when Stacie flipped her off.

“That we should all live together.” Chloe took a drink of her soda when Beca snorted. “Ever since you said it this morning it’s been in my mind.”

“I actually… kind of agree,” Aubrey said thoughtfully.

“You do?” Stacie turned and brought her leg up underneath her to face Aubrey fully. “You sound actually serious.” Not that she was against it and in fact had loved the idea since the night before. It just felt right and made so much damn sense to her. But she had thought the others had considered everything they’d said this morning as just four friends goofing around and teasing each other.

“I am,” Aubrey shrugged and wiped her lips with a paper towel. “I mean, think about it. It may be too soon to be this sure about things, but I get the feeling you and I are going to be spending more time together than apart, at one of our houses. Life would be simpler if we moved together.”

“Okay, okay. This is faster than even the worst lesbian U-Haul joke,” Beca pointed out. “You can’t be serious.”

Chloe turned and put her arm on Beca’s legs. “Are you saying you don’t want to be with me as often as possible?” She gave Beca a patented Chloe Beale Pout that never failed to make Stacie cave and it looked like Beca was going to be no exception.

Beca made a face. “If anyone else had said that to me I’d already be out the door calling an Uber. That is a danger sign of clingy and I don’t do clingy.” She reached down and stroked her fingertips through Chloe’s hair before curling a lock around her finger. “But since you said it… It’s barely been a day but… you’re not wrong and I don’t think I can argue too much.”

“Not right away, of course.” Aubrey said after another bite. “But like, maybe in six months we see where things stand and think about it then.”

“You think you’ll get tired of me in six months?” Stacie pouted again, not even remotely serious and making sure it showed. She had no doubts that they were on the same page there. Something this big required a lot of real conversations, serious ones, despite the fact that her heart said they weren’t necessary.

“Never know,” Aubrey said airily. “I could find someone better in bed.” Beca almost choked on her mouthful of pizza and Aubrey turned to pat her on the back. “Sorry Beca.”

Beca coughed for another few seconds then gratefully took the can of soda Chloe handed her. “Never try to ugly laugh while you’re eating pizza. The cheese tried to go down the air hole and that’s a bitch to get back out.”

“Did you just say ‘air hole’?” Chloe let out a giggle and shook her head. “That’s your go to? ‘Air hole’?”

“It’s so much easier to remember in the moment than ‘windpipe’,” Beca shrugged and took another bite, chewing carefully. “When I was little I called it a blowhole because my parents took me on a whale watching boat once and their spray was the coolest thing I’d ever seen.”

“You… are priceless and I am definitely in love with you.” Chloe tilted her head up and without hesitation despite the instant blush to her cheeks, Beca leaned down and gave her a quick kiss. “So you’re not allowed to choke on food in your air hole anymore.”

“Aw,” Emily cooed. “This was almost worth the mental scarring I know I’m about to get tonight.” She batted away the paper towel Chloe threw at her without looking.

Aubrey leaned against Stacie’s side. “So, for the record, since we’re in front of our best friends and family.” Stacie looked at her, brows knitting in confusion. “I will forever be grateful that you were the one who innocently parked your bike in my slot.”

Beca let out a high pitched snicker that she quickly muffled with her napkin. “Sorry.” She set down her pizza and waved with her other hand. “Sorry.”

“No you’re not, B. You said it that way just to trigger her gutter mind, didn’t you?” Stacie laughed when Aubrey only grinned at her. “But you still want to wait six months before living with me?”

“It’s the sane thing to do,” Aubrey sighed. “While I’ve talked to Emily and Chloe for a couple years, that’s still different than really starting to get to know them this past day. And you…” Aubrey put her left hand on Stacie’s thigh and squeezed. “I know we said it earlier but really, we’ve only spent maybe a combined 24 hours in each other’s presence.” She gave Stacie a soft smile that caused her heart to pang and beat faster. “But… no. I don’t want to wait. It’s stupid and impulsive but I would move in with you tomorrow if it were possible.”

“I mean, it is.” Beca shrugged when they all looked at her. “You just have to figure out which house you want and sell the other. The bitch is that you’d still have to pay for it until it sold.” She sat back, her plate on her lap. “Which is ultimately the same thing you’ll be doing even if you kept separate houses anyway – you’d just lose the safety net of having a backup house once it sells.” She pursed her lips. “Suppose you could always do short term rentals to folks if you’re really worried about compatibility and don’t want to lose the house. But if we’re really going to do this – and honestly it sounds like fun until it goes horribly wrong – might as well just wait and we all move at once. I think I’ve only got three months left on my current agreement anyway.”

“A good point, Starfish.” Beca made a face as Stacie looked down at Chloe, struck by a thought. “You also like to somehow take up more than your share of the bed –”

“Which is ‘fun’ when the three of us have a sleepover,” Emily added with a roll of her eyes. “Somehow I wake up with Stacie’s arm over my face or her knee in my back.”

“Sorry, Em.” Stacie said contritely though she smiled at the memories. “But I was more just curious how that’d work when you’re both fighting for maximum sprawl space.”

“Just means we’ll have to get a bigger bed,” Chloe said easily. “I may have gotten bored at work and done a casual search after talking earlier.” Beca perked up and opened her mouth but was interrupted.

“Nope.” Emily said immediately. “I don’t need the exact context to know I don’t want to know.”

“Probably best,” Chloe patted her leg comfortingly. “But… back to Aubrey’s point about waiting.”

“I hate that I made it,” Aubrey sighed. “It’s that stupid lawyer part of my brain that thinks things through to the point where it’s all mapped out and there’s no spontaneity. Getting away from that is why I moved.”

“That was an impulse that worked out.” Beca turned to her. “And not just because you met me and I’m fucking awesome. You’ve made a new life here and I know how much you hated your old one as a drone.”

“I love how confident you are,” Stacie said through a laugh.

“You’re saying I’m not fucking awesome?” Beca’s eyebrows went up.

Stacie decided to answer that as stated and not as her brain wanted her to because Emily would laugh first but probably just get up and walk out the door. “I didn’t say that. I knew from the second we met that we were going to be great friends one day.”

“You mean ‘day one’,” Beca nodded with satisfaction. “I feel the same about you, Bucky.”

“One of us needs to have the ability to hit the brakes,” Chloe offered. “And it’s going to take us a while to find a place that would suit all of us.” Aubrey started nodding slowly. “Assuming we all agreed to actually do it.” She shifted so she could look at them and Emily equally without having to crane her neck around. “And I’m in, by the way – I’m so in. I think it would be fun to have you all as roommates.”

“What about you, Em?” Stacie asked, reaching for another slice of pizza and setting it on her plate while she leaned back.

“Me?” Emily shook her head rapidly. “No, no way.”

“What?” Stacie frowned. “Seriously?” That definitely wasn’t the answer she had expected.

“Seriously.”

“She does sound Dixie Chick Serious,” Beca said casually, not even flinching when Aubrey thumped her in the leg. Stacie smiled as she remembered singing what she’d already begun thinking of as their song to Aubrey before falling asleep.

“Unless my bedroom had the best soundproofing in the world, there’s no way I would live with the four of you.” Emily shook her head. “While I will be over almost every single night, I will definitely be going home to sleep.”

“What about a house with one of those detached in-law apartments or guest house?” Aubrey said reasonably and the room fell silent as they all considered.

Stacie had been about to teasingly whine about wanting her favorite cousin close but all she could do was look at Aubrey in awe. “Oh my god you’re brilliant.” She got a shy grin in response and a pat on her thigh.

Emily chewed thoughtfully on the last of her crust. “Actually… that’s… not a bad idea.”

“Woo!” Stacie held up her hand toward her cousin, just out of reach. “Air high five!”

“You two are such dorks and I love you,” Chloe laughed as the two of them slapped the air in front of them. She lifted the lid of the pizza box so Emily could take another piece.

“Between the five of us we should be able to afford something like that, right?” Beca frowned. “Not that the shop makes a ton of money but I can afford more than the apartment I’ve been renting.”

“We’ll revisit tomorrow, once we’ve all had some real sleep?” Chloe looked around as they nodded. “And probably several more conversations over the next few months.”

“Because as much as I am into this idea,” Beca agreed. “There are a lot of things to be worked out before we start looking.”

“Figuring out a price range, how many rooms… I know Beca’s going to need space for storing gear and… oh god we’re going to have so many cars.” Aubrey shook her head. “I used to laugh at those listings where they had three bedrooms and three garages but now we’re going to need to be those pretentious assholes. Can we afford that?”

“That’s not something we have to figure out tonight. We save it for another day,” Stacie offered. “Who knows, maybe this won’t even work and this magical house doesn’t exist.”

“It does.” Chloe interrupted. “We’ll find it.”

Emily was nodding before she’d finished. “Now that I can picture it safely from a guest house, yeah. She’s right.” She bounced in her chair. “This is gonna be awesome!”

“This definitely calls for a toast,” Stacie said, wiping off pizza grease from her fingers. “Mixer for the coke or should I break out the wine?”

“Vodka please,” Emily said through a mouthful of pizza, belatedly covering her mouth while she chewed. “Sorry.”

“Gross.” Stacie shook her head. “I know Aunt K taught you better than that. You three good with that or want something else?” She stood to a chorus of ‘yes please’ and headed to the kitchen, aware that Aubrey had followed her in.

“Glasses are in that cupboard,” Stacie pointed as she opened the freezer and took out the bottle she kept there and a small bag of ice. Aubrey moved past her with a kiss to her shoulder blade and began taking five glasses out and setting them on the counter. “So, living together already?”

“Once the kneejerk fear was out of the way,” Aubrey turned and leaned against the counter. “Doesn’t it feel like we’re supposed to?”

“Yes.” Stacie closed the freezer and turned to set the bottle beside the glasses and the bag in the sink. She took a step forward and pressed against Aubrey. “Almost anyone else and I’d assume that I was in that ‘new love’ feeling that leads to all the U-Haul jokes and never seriously consider it but…” She leaned forward and found Aubrey’s mouth already parting for her. It was slow but deep; a dangerous combination despite their time together earlier in the evening. She felt Aubrey’s hands shift to her waist, always pulling her ever closer and Stacie’s pulse sped up.

“Don’t make me send Beca in there after you,” Chloe yelled at them. “Who knows what’ll happen this time.”

“Hey!” Beca objected. “I’m not drunk yet; I might be able to pry them apart without being affected by their lust aura.”

Chloe’s laugh filled the living room. “That’s totes the best way to put it but also I don’t know if you can.”

“Nothing,” Emily yelled back over Beca’s indignant squawk. “Nothing will happen because I can see into the kitchen from here and I know where the knives are.”

Laughing, Stacie pulled back and rested their foreheads together. “So, we’re really in this?” Stacie thought she could spend a lifetime looking into the eyes so close to hers and never be able to name all the shades of color she could see in them.

“With each other?” Aubrey smiled. “Or with them?”

“Yes.” Stacie said simply. She wanted it all. She wanted Aubrey. She wanted her best friend, her new friend and her cousin all living with her. That feeling of need and belonging wasn’t something she had ever wanted before and she felt she should be terrified at wanting and needing anyone this much but all she felt was equal measures of calm and excitement at the prospect.

“We’re all going to kill each other, being underfoot like that,” Aubrey pointed out. “You are aware of that? You’ve seen me; I can be a little… irrational… sometimes, when I get an idea stuck in my head.”

“You’re not alone in that. Chloe’s been known to have a good freak out or three, and -” she raised her voice. “Sorry Beca, but I’m sure I’m going to find something annoying about you eventually.”

“The first time you wake me up on a day I get to sleep in,” Beca promised. “Wrath. You will know it.”

“Looking forward to it,” Stacie assured her and forced herself to take a step back from Aubrey. “I’m certainly going to have my own moments where you’d like to strangle me… But I really think between those times we’re all going to be laughing our asses off because we are all fucking amazing.” She took a deep breath, trying to find words to explain the certainty she felt. “And I don’t know how but we all seem to fit together perfectly and I think we’ll balance each other out.” Stacie shrugged. “And Emily will be there to referee if needed and keep us in check.”

“If we can find a place and if we all still agree.” Aubrey ran her hand down Stacie’s arm. “There’s a lot that has to happen and we might not.”

“We will.” Stacie didn’t know how she knew but she could feel it in her bones that it would happen and probably a lot sooner than any of them thought possible.

“Then yeah, I’m in.” Aubrey nodded once. “I am so fucking in with all of you lunatics.”

Stacie kissed her again, quickly because if she let herself linger she wouldn’t be able to stop, and forced herself to turn away to dig the ancient drink mixer she’d gotten from her grandfather out of the silverware drawer.

“Aubrey,” Chloe sighed from the living room. “You of all people should know you can’t say fucking in front of Beca.”

“Is she giggling like a nine year old boy?” Aubrey grinned and helped Stacie add ice to their glasses.

“She’s turning red trying to hold it in, but yes,” Emily answered when Chloe started laughing.

“I can’t help it!” Beca defended herself. “Aubrey rarely curses and I love it each and every time.” There was a pause. “Plus it drops me into the gutter.”

“You never leave the gutter, let’s be honest.” Aubrey carefully picked up four of the glasses and headed back to the living room. Stacie put the ice back in the freezer and snagged a 2 liter of Coke from the fridge. Picking up the mixer, remaining glass and bottles, Stacie followed her out. “You’ve lived in the gutter as long as I’ve known you.”

“Guilty,” Beca said as they came back in. “It’s all part of my charm.”

Aubrey set the glasses down before sitting back down next to Beca. “You keep telling yourself that.” She poured the remainder of her can of Coke into one of the glasses, the rest following suit.

Stacie pulled the cover off the pour spout and began adding a generous amount of vodka to everyone’s glass. As she put the cover back on, Emily was already topping them all off with the 2 liter and Beca had picked up the mixer.

“Holy shit, I haven’t seen one of these in years!” She pressed the button on the side and the diamond shaped end began to spin. “My grandpa had one of these and I always loved it!” She stopped it for a second and put it in her drink and turned it back on, her smile turning wistful.

“Gramps had a whole bar set up downstairs,” Stacie smiled back at her. “He had a pool table set up in the middle of the room, a fireplace along one side, a piano in one corner and along the same wall he had a full bar.”

“One of us would play bartender and we’d pretend to order drinks.” Emily added, smiling when Beca handed her the mixer. “Used playing cards as cash.”

“Did you ever actually sneak the booze?” Aubrey asked, leaning back against Stacie.

“Nope,” Stacie laughed. “We never even considered it. It was all 7-Up or Pepsi and make-believe. God those were good times.” She smiled at her cousin and the memory. “Several of our families would gather for the big holidays in their narrow ass two story duplex. We never fit but somehow we made it work.”

“Most of us kids would spend the time downstairs, pretending we could shoot pool.” Emily handed the mixer to Chloe who took care of Stacie’s and Aubrey’s drinks before her own. “We’d even eat our dinner at the bar. I still don’t know how we didn’t drop our plates going down those death trap stairs.”

“Youthful luck.” Stacie reached out and handed Aubrey her glass and then took her own. Lifting it, she looked around at her newly forged family. Sentimental, sure, but that didn’t make it less true for all the speed in which it had happened. “A toast?”

“How about to new friends?” Emily lifted her glass.

“New family,” Chloe corrected, always able to read Stacie’s mind in a way she should have found worrisome.

“You guys better not make me cry before I’ve had enough to drink to blame it on,” Beca said. “I gave up on family long ago. Then Aubrey found me and now you guys…” She shook her head, blinking a few times. “To family.”

They all clinked their glasses together and took a drink.

“And,” Aubrey said, raising her glass a second time. “To the joys of house hunting.”

After they’d clinked and sipped, Stacie angled a little so she could see Beca. “Hey, Beca. I hear you know karate.”

“What?” Beca made a face. “That’s a physical activity and I make it a point to avoid physical activity.” She held up a finger when Aubrey drew breath. “Riding bikes and sex do not reside in the same level of physical activity that kicking people in the face does.”

“It does it you do it right,” Chloe said as she grabbed another slice of pizza.

Stacie eyed her cousin but Emily only shrugged. “I can’t argue even if I don’t want to hear my sister from another mother talk about it.”

“What is this conversation? Why do you even think that?” Beca took another drink and eyed her warily.

“Aubrey told me that you were up and ready to defend her honor at the slightest sound while she was injured.” Stacie grinned when Beca groaned at her.

“You told her?” She nudged Aubrey’s knee with her own. “Snitch.”

“Well,” Aubrey drawled. “I was actually telling her about forgetting I couldn’t put weight on it and that I dropped to the floor like a marionette with its strings cut. Telling her about waking you was just a bonus.”

Chloe and Emily were looking between them but Chloe waved her hand. “Care to fill us in?”

“I yelled when I fell, breaking a lamp in the process and woke Beca up,” Aubrey explained. “She was on her feet before her eyes were open and her hands were in prime chopping position.” Aubrey lifted hers and demonstrated. “I’d have expected fists to punch like a scrappy boxer but I’d have been wrong.”

“Maybe your new nickname should be Karate Kid,” Stacie declared. “But I will likely shorten that to just Kid.”

“Aren’t I older than you?” Beca asked, exasperated. “I accepted Starfish but I think I even prefer Boobs McGee over Karate Kid.”

“You don’t get to choose nicknames, Beca,” Aubrey admonished sweetly. “They’re given by those who love you and know you well.” She leaned over and kissed her cheek. “It means a lot that you are willing to defend me in my time of need.”

“Yeah yeah,” Beca muttered though her lips twitched into a grin. “You’re my person.”

“See? You love me.” Aubrey leaned over and pulled her into a hug. “You’re my person too.”

“Aw, that’s so cute.” Emily hopped out of her chair. “Movie time!”

“Nothing sappy,” Beca pleaded as Aubrey let her go. “Can we have action and explosions? And definitely not Karate Kid?”

“Sure,” Emily said easily, looking through Stacie’s collection. “Popcorn movies are fun and it gives me an excuse to make more before I have more pizza.”

Aubrey slid over and Stacie put an arm around her. “We’ll find a romantic drama you’ll like one day, Becs.”

Beca snorted. “You should know better by now than to say such things.”

Chloe looked up at them. “Is there room for me on the couch?”

“There’s maybe some room between Beca and I,” Aubrey said. “But it’s up to you if you wanna squish in or stretch out across us.”

“I’ll squish,” Chloe said as she stood. “Though that really almost leads to a horror movie cuddle, since I have someone to grab on either side.”

“Ooh!” Emily swiftly pulled a case from shelf and stepped to the TV. “An even better idea.” She stopped and turned to them. “Unless you guys don’t do horror?”

“Aubrey laughs her ass off,” Beca said as she scooted to the arm of the couch so Chloe could sit down. “So we’re good.”

Emily sighed. “I usually jump but we’ve seen this one enough that I have most of the jump scares down. Have you seen Cabin in the Woods?”

“That’s actually one of my favorites,” Aubrey laughed. “If you get freaked out you can have my spot and cuddle your cousin.” She paused and shrugged. “Or lay across our laps, I suppose.”

“Deal.” Emily put the disc in the player and turned off the lamp in the corner, leaving the room lit by the TV and the kitchen behind them.

“Did you know,” Chloe said idly as she reached for her drink again and took a sip. “That they have beds you can buy that are twelve feet across?”

“Chloe, you and Beca are the shortest people I know. What on earth would you need with an expanse like that?” Stacie laughed then broke off when Chloe shot her a sly grin and wiggled her eyebrows. “Oh my god, woman!”

“Dirty bird,” Aubrey said in admiration. “You’ll have to tell me more.”

“I’m out,” Emily declared and popped up out of the armchair she’d just settled in. “You’ve now put the forbidden image in my head and it’s all I’m going to see when I look at the four of you.”

“Wait wait,” Chloe laughed and reached over Beca to grab her wrist as she went by the couch. Stacie had seen the grin Emily tried to hide and knew she wasn’t going to leave. “I’m sorry, I’ll behave. I’ve just been sitting on that since this afternoon and couldn’t hold it in anymore. Come cuddle with us.”

Stacie picked up the remote and started the movie as Emily allowed herself to be pulled back around the couch. Beca had already pulled one of the throw pillows from behind her back and set it on her lap. As Emily carefully stretched out across their laps, Stacie felt like the Grinch as her heart swelled with affection and gratitude for the women in her life.

It wasn’t that she hadn’t loved and felt love in return before now. It was that she hadn’t expected a family beyond Emily and Chloe. She’d never found it important before pure chance had brought it into her life and now she couldn’t imagine her life without them.

She was in.

She was so fucking in.

-----------------

A/N: One day I may revisit this series because we all know the four of them end up together. I have some very vague ideas about a secondary plot line about training to beat DSM in a race - I know nothing about racing so I don't know if I could pull that off convincingly even if it takes place behind the scenes. Obviously main plot would be them finally figuring things out but... I don’t know if ya’ll would be interested in more of this world?

#Staubrey #Stacie Conrad #Aubrey Posen #Bechloe #beca mitchell #Chloe Beale #Emily Junk #cyc writes #switching gears #i am going to miss these dorks

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nicnacsnonsense · 3 years

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Been thinking about my hypothetical live action remake of Korra (seriously Netflix, call me, I have so many amazing ideas) and how I would tackle season two since it’s definitely the season that needs the most work, specifically and especially the Unalaq & Raava-Vaatu plotline. I kind of got carried away, like I do, but I’m very excited about it; a lot of good strong themes here. I’m going to start by talking about the changes to the first half, pre-Beginnings interlude, then the Beginnings episodes, then the back half. For the most part, all of the major plot beats still stay the same, at least until the climax, but the way those beats are contextualized are going to get pretty different building up to a radically different climax (no spirit being kaiju fight, yay!).

With Unalaq in the front half, the one major change is I want the religious fundamentalism vibes that come on so strong when he’s introduced to ramp up after the Northern Tribe soldiers show up and especially after Korra finally realizes he’s a bad guy, rather than petering out like happens in canon. I want to actually see him impose strict expectations of behavior in accordance with what he feels honors the spirits on the people of Southern Water Tribe. Let’s get some misogyny and restrictive gender roles up in here. That’s going to be great (from a storytelling perspective, obviously) because it’s relatively low-hanging fruit to communicate that the bad guy is bad, it fits in well thematically with where we’re going and the religious fundamentalism, and there is canon precedent in The Last Airbender that restrictive gender roles are a traditional value in the Northern Water Tribe.

A quick sidebar related to themes, in whatever episode where we first have Unalaq really cracking down on those gender roles, I want a B or possibly C plot with the Tenzin family vacation, where Jinora comes out to Tenzin as nonbinary. She is questioning with regards to the exact nature of her gender, but does say its some combination of both masculine and feminine, though other nonbinary identities – including agender, genderfluid, and a gender that is completely divorced from male-female – are floated. Tenzin is supportive and affirming and also suggests Jinora talk with her Aunt Kya, who he identifies as being a transwoman. (Kya is a trans lesbian in my version; you gotta deal with it.) This obviously serves to contrast Unalaq with his strict gender roles, and continues to build our theme.

For Korra in the first half, I do want to drag her emotional volatility down just a tad as compared to where she’s at in canon for these episodes. I still want her getting emotional and acting rash – that’s a huge part of her character – but I want her anger to feel sympathetic to the audience. Though I do also want at least one moment where Korra gets angry for good reason and starts yelling at Unalaq and he chides her for being emotional and irrational and he’s not going to discuss this with her if she can’t behave calmly and logically, blah, blah, blah, misogyny.

The final and biggest change that we’re making in the first half is Korra does not yet have her bending back. Season one does still end with her talking with Aang and learning energybending, which she uses to restore everyone else’s bending and restore her own connection to the other three elements, but in the opening episode of season two, we learn that she still can only airbend. She says that as far as she can tell everything should be alright and she should be able to bend fire, water, and earth, but obviously she can’t. She also mentioned that while it looks like it should, she feels like there is something missing, or maybe something there that she can’t see. Which my clever readers of course realize is a reference to Raava. After her flashback coma, Korra gains the other elements back, explaining that what she was missing was her connection to Raava had been damaged. Not broken, which is why she could still airbend and do all the other Avatar stuff she was doing, but damaged enough that Raava could no longer switch elements for her or give her access to multiple elements at once.

Moving on to Beginnings, right off the bat, I’m getting rid of the notion that all humans have to huddle on the backs of lion turtles out of fear of the spirits. The two worlds are connected, but humans and spirits co-exist peacefully for the most part. The lion turtles instead act as mediators when necessary, and do sometimes give out bending for humans to defend themselves with, but not as a regular thing every time they need to leave their city. We’ll have to switch up the stealing fire and Chin plot a little to accommodate this change, but somehow or other it happens and Wan gets banished with firebending.

Eventually he comes across Raava and Vaatu fighting and these two characters are getting some major shake ups. First off, in canon Raava identifies as being peace to counter Vaatu’s chaos, but peace is not the opposite of chaos; order is. Now, looking into yin & yang, chaos & order are not aspects that traditionally apply to them, but we’re going to let that addition of order to yang and light and chaos to yin and dark stand. Not everything has to be perfectly aligned. That said, one way in which we are going to switch things to make them fit better is yang is the masculine energy with yin as feminine. We’re switching the voices.

So Wan sees them fighting, and Vaatu calls out for help. And Wan is like, oh no, a damsel in distress; I’ll help you, milady! So, he helps, giving Vaatu the advantage. She beats up Raava, then flies off. Raava chastises Wan, explaining that he is the spirit of light and order, and he has been trying since the beginning of time to defeat Vaatu, but their battles have always ended in a draw. But now Wan has given Vaatu the advantage and if they don’t fix this, she’ll be victorious at the upcoming Harmonic Convergence, sending the worlds into ten thousand years of darkness. To which Wan is like, oh no, that sounds horrible. Well, Mr. Masculine Manly Spirit-Man Raava, I like light and order and you seem like a logical rational person; I’ll for sure help you put that emotional crazy spirit lady in her place. (Have I made the irony here clear enough? I don’t think I can get much more blatant. Though obviously in the show version it would be a little more subtle.)

After that we get Raava & Wan’s training and learning the elements montage, with some encounters with “corrupted” spirits along the way. Corrupted being Raava’s word, and he elaborates to say that all spirits fall under either Raava or Vaatu’s domain, all with varying inherent levels of light & order and dark & chaos to them. Vaatu gaining in power is causing the levels of dark& chaos in these spirits to rise, throwing them out of balance. Eventually comes time for Harmonic Convergence, Raava & Wan vs. Vaatu, and Vaatu wins. Ten thousand years of chaos, baby. With the last of the spirit energy as Harmonic Convergence ends, Wan fuses with Raava, then unleashes a crazy, amazing spirit attack, imprisoning Vaatu, banishing all the spirits from the physical world to the spirit world, and sealing the portals, all as an attempt to mitigate the fall out from chaos ascendent. Since then, the Avatar, imbued with the spirit of order, has fought back against the chaos to try to restore balance to the world.

Korra wakes up and panics. They have to stop Unalaq who is trying to free Vaatu, probably because he wants to destroy the world or something. But when she next has a chance to confront Unalaq, he’s like, not you stupid girl. I’m not trying to destroy the world; I’m trying to save it. Wan was right to side with order, but wrong to think he could stop chaos by teaming up with Raava and destroying it from without. No chaos is inside all of us, the evil infesting every human heart (Unalaq’s words, not mine) and it can only be dominated through one’s own strong force of will and conviction. So his plan is to fuse with Vaatu and then dominate her, destroy her chaos and using her power to allow him to bring his order across all of existence, both in the physical and spirit worlds. Korra’s not too keen on that plan either. She’s still going to stop him.

Korra fails to stop him. Harmonic Convergence begins, Vaatu is freed, she goes inside of Unalaq, and she immediately subsumes him. Turns out you can’t eliminate all the chaos in the world just by willpower, you absolute looney toon. Vaatu explains that even as Unalaq was planning to use her, she was using him to get free and now is going to use him as a meat puppet to help her fight Raava & the Avatar.

So, they fight, and for a bit it’s evenly matched, then Vaatu gains the upper hand. Just as Vaatu appears she’s about to deal the finishing blow, Unalaq briefly regains control and interrupts her – to be clear, he manages this because of his desperate need for order and control, not out of any affection for Korra. While he’s in control he says something in defiance of Vaatu that coming from Unalaq we can hear is clearly some fascist bullshit, but also echoes something that Wan/Raava said back in their battle with Vaatu. And Korra’s like, wait, hold up a second.

Lightbulb turns on for Korra at that moment, and by the time Vaatu has resecure control, Korra has dropped her offensive stance. She tells Vaatu she doesn’t want to fight her; she wants her to fuse with her and Raava. Neither Vaatu nor Raava like this idea. Korra has to go on the defensive holding off Vaatu’s attacks, and has to internally fight against Raava wanting to attack Vaatu all while trying to sell them both on this idea. She explains that too much chaos has been bad for the world, but too much order would be bad too – case in point, Unalaq. Both chaos and order, both Raava and Vaatu are needed for balance. And yeah, they can achieve balance by constantly fighting each other, with every encounter ending as a draw, or they could achieve balance through harmony together. Because even as they are opposites, they are one and the same, a part of a greater whole. A bunch of stuff to that effect, including mentions of the Northern Water Tribe upsetting the balance by trying to dominate the Southern Water Tribe, and also a shout out to Tui and La in there somewhere, the original Yin/Yang Avatar couple. Eventually Korra convinces them, she fuses with Vaatu, and Harmonic Convergence ends in a tie, returning the world to balance once again.

And of course, now that balance has been achieved, Korra leaves the spirit portals open. Remember in this version spirits and humans got along fine, and the separation was only necessary because the world had fallen out of balance. And yes, the rejoining of the physical and spirit worlds was probably something Unalaq wanted too, but we’re not giving him credit for it, because for every good idea a fascist ever had, there’s someone else who isn’t a fascist who had the same idea, but better, because it wasn’t coming from a fascist.

#the legend of korra #atlok #unalaq #raava #vaatu #long post

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colour-outside-the-liness · 3 years

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Hi Colour! This is going to be a long one, so buckle up!

Oh wow, that's so precious! You've definitely earned the "real life Dani" nickname haha I wish I could find something meaningful like that to do with my life. I'm actually autistic and have ADHD so hearing you do this kind of work makes me really happy! Keep up the good work Ms. Clayton! 😁 Haha

You sound like a lot of fun to hang out with at pubs! Haha I'm glad you identify with that bit of info on your star placements. I had a lot of fun doing it too!

The thing about Hozier is that some of his lyrics are incredibly sapphic to me for some reason, I'm still trying to figure it out. NFWMB is one of the songs that feels like that to me. Don't know if you've heard it before but give it a try if you haven't. If you close your eyes it sounds like you're in an epic romantic story and there are swords, pretty gowns, and rooms lit by torches. Haha

The beginning of this song was inspired by a poem written by W.B Yeats called "The Second Coming" in 1920, and it talks about an apocalypse of sorts, alluding to all of the horrors men inflicted upon the world which ends up awakening this beast that goes to Jesus's place of birth in the Bible (Bethlehem) to be born. The last lines being:

"And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,

Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?"

So the song starts with:

"When I first saw you

The end was soon

To Bethlehem it slouched

And then, it must've caught a good look at you"

And oh boy do I think of Dani when I hear that. Especially bc of that scene where Viola accepts Dani's invitation to live inside her. And nobody knows why she accepts it (but I do!).

And yeah at first glance you might not think much of Dani. in the beginning she's just a tiny frail small-town girl with a lot of anxiety, running away from her past traumas. But she proves us wrong again and again and again. She moves to a country she's never been before entirely by herself, sees an opportunity, and doesn't let go of it even when it looks like it went wrong. Then is very loving and tender with these children who have gone through so much and are still going through so much. Tries to fight (with a fire poker!!) the threatening man that keeps harassing her, the children, and her friends. THEN manages to soften the angry, grumpy lesbian who's given up on people after A LOT of trauma (too much in my opinion) and doesn't give up on her when she rejects her either. Freaking exorcises her ex and makes him stop haunting her so she can be with the love of her life. And then finally as if all of that didn't make her the bravest hero in this story, she literally stops an apocalypse from happening and saves everyone from this beast by sacrificing herself without even thinking twice. Saves everyone that came before her and then the ones who'll come after for the rest of eternity. I mean the P-O-W-E-R this girl has. 💪 so hell yeah the lady in the lake wanted to take her.

When Hozier says:

"Ain't it a gentle sound, the rollin' in the graves?

Ain't it like thunder under earth, the sound it makes?

Ain't it exciting you, the rumble where you lay?

Ain't you my baby? ain't you my baby?"

I can only think of Dani at the bottom of the lake laying on top of all the bones of the people Viola killed and how she's at peace living forever in a dark place like that. That's kinda hardcore y'know?

After the first verses, Hozier goes on to talk abt his lover, someone so utterly terrifying even the beast of the end of the world can't stand to look at them. But this song is also about being proud to be this person's lover bc nothing can fuck with them, not bc you are there to protect them and wouldn't let anyone harm them, but bc they're more than capable of protecting themselves and you too. So in my head, this song is Jamie's declaration of love to Dani.

And then I think of Jamie's devotion to Dani when she said "If you can't feel anything, then I'll feel everything for the both of us." shown in this verse:

"If I was born as a blackthorn tree

I'd wanna be felled by you

Held by you

Fuel the pyre of your enemies"

And the fact that she took what she could get just to be with Dani. She knew she'd have to suffer for/bc of her at some point, but chose to be with her anyway. I have no doubts in my mind she'd want to be anything for her as long as they could be together in any way, shape, or form. In all the lives they happened to meet one another too.

Wouldn't it be cool to see them in an AU where Dani is like a medieval princess who's supposed to marry Edmund to form an alliance between kingdoms or something and Jamie is an assassin who is hired to kill the princess so she has to pretend to be Dani's personal guard or wtever but they fall in love and run away together and Jamie teaches her how to fight so Dani becomes this warrior but turns out Dani is naturally good at it and then she becomes a legend? Hahaha I can see her riding a horse in the winter with paint on her face and her blonde hair falling over this fur-lined cloak, fierce look on her face, and Jamie riding next to her (always). Then they come across Viola who's a witch and puts a curse on Dani and then Dani and Jamie have to travel to all sorts of places and fight all sorts of people and go on this whole adventure to rid Dani of this curse. Maybe Dani has to go back to her kingdom bc her father dies and there are other people trying to take her kingdom so there's a lot of angst and suffering but then they win at the end after a lot of sweat and tears and they live happily ever after! 😎Hahaha

Anyway, I hope you're having a great week so far and hope you had fun with your niece today! (I know if I was her and you had us make fudge and paint I'd worship you haha) I'm sorry for the very (very) long ask, but I've been obsessing over this idea for months and I just had to share it with someone! ✌️✨

(And you can call me Libby or wtever since I'm not anon anymore 🤗)

Awwh thank you so much for saying I have earned my 'real life Dani' title is means a lot to me that you guys see that in me!! I am sure you do so many meaningful things in life without even realising it!! I honestly just want to make a difference and I love helping people so going into a career like this just seemed so natural to me and I really do love what I do!! Thank you so much I really hope I can keep up the good work!! I hope I'm a lot of fun- I know I have helped win a few pub quizzes and there's been a few times I've won games of trivial pursuit as well so that really did make so much sense to me and learning about all the placements of my chart was so much fun and was so interesting so thank you very much!! I have heard some of Hozier's lyrics are quite sapphic and I always mean to look into more of his songs and then just never do but I will definitely look in to NFWMB because the lyrics you have sent me here are incredible and definitely give of Dani x Jamie vibes I definitely agree with you in everything you have said about why Viola accepted Dani's invitation- Dani and Viola are similar in some ways and this was something I was explaining to my niece when she watched it with me. I explained to her that both Viola and Dani are strong willed, and stubborn, and would do anything to fiercely protect the people they care about. We saw that time and time again with Dani, how within days of knowing Miles and Flora she was out with a fire poker trying to protect them from a strange man that she kept seeing around the manor. And how Viola would've done anything to protect her daughter. One major difference between them though is that Viola seemed to have a slight selfish streak where as Dani is entirely selfless, she was selfless for the longest time in even agreeing to marry Eddie so she wouldn't hurt him, she was selfless in protecting Miles and Flora, and even more selfless in saving Flora's life and freeing all the trapped spirits of Bly Manor and then she is selfless in the fact that she won't drag anyone down and won't hurt anyone else at Bly ever again. The one thing she did for herself was being with Jamie- and she was able to make Jamie open up and trust people in way she probably hadn't for the longest time. Dani is a truly strong person as was Viola and I can see why she would accept Dani's invitation. I will have to listen to this song to see it from a Jamie perspective which I will definitely do tomorrow but from the lyrics you have sent me I can definitely see it being a love declaration to Dani from Jamie. Jamie knew in the end she would suffer because she knew she wouldn't be able to keep Dani forever, and knew that one day she would have to leave her- but she knew loving Dani for as long as she was allowed to would be worth that pain in the end and Jamie is a truly strong person as well for knowing this and staying by Dani's side anyway when that must have been such a hard thing for Jamie to ever have to accept. Jamie would've been anything for Dani and would've one anything for her as Dani would've for Jamie and that's why I love them so much. They loved each other so purely and without conditions and so wholeheartedly and it really was such a lovely thing to watch play out in front of us (even if it did hurt us all at the end). I think it would be so cool to see an AU like that I think medieval stuff is always so fun and so interesting and a good enemies to lovers start never fails either because there's so much tension there between them. And Jamie being undercover as someone to get close to Dani and them slowly falling in love with each other would just be a great thing to see!! And I am all for warrior Dani and Jamie (women with weapons is a little bit of a weakness of mine)!! This whole AU just sounds incredible I love a good curse in fantasy stories and the curse slowly taking over and you thinking they're going to run out of time but everything works out in the end!! Dani going back to her kingdom because of her sick Dad dying would be great for angst because it would look

like she would have to marry someone to create an alliance and that she would have to take over a kingdom (perhaps something she never wanted to do in the first place)!! I think this could be a very angsty one shot and could be so interesting and fun and the happy ending would definitely make all the angst worth it in the end!! I am having a good week so far thank you and I had so much fun with my niece today, making fudge went great and she was happy that I was able to show her how to do it because she'd never made it before so now that's something she knows how to do (I think she thinks I'm way cooler than I actually am haha thank you for saying you'd worship me though if you were my niece haha 😂) but tomorrow she is teaching me how to do something because I taught her how to make fudge today... she's gonna teach me how to draw in an anime style- which is something she is really into and even though I'm not she loves drawing so I've asked if she can teach me since I taught her something today!! There's no need to apologise I loved this long angst and I loved this idea I think it's really great and interesting and that song just seems amazing and I am definitely gonna listen to it tomorrow when I get chance!! Thank you for sharing this idea with me I loved it!! ☺️ Haha oki doki then as long as that's alright with you Libby is what I'll call you!! Like I said you can seriously call me anything!! ☺️

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palmtreepalmtree · 4 years

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Alright, this one is long overdue for an anonymous friend who really wanted me to review The Healer. So after a short pause, here is another edition of

The Worst Movie on Netflix Right Now™

Heavy sigh.

Alright. Let’s talk about this one.

First off, I have to do some pretty serious content warnings, cause I know some people have been receiving some bad news recently and this review goes someplace you might not expect so, I love you guys, but please be aware that this review deals with: cancer, terminal illness, kids with cancer.

Now back to the bullshit.

This is basically a movie about a fucking dumbass dude who has trouble making obvious decisions.

SPOILERS AHEAD (are you new here?)

The main character Alec Bailey, begins the film as a total fuckwit. He lives in England (somewhere about) and owns a failing electronic handyman business that he calls “The Healer” (in the most pathetic stretch of narrative bullshit, but okay) and is in deep gambling debts to the Russian mob.

As our story begins, Alec discovers that he has a long lost rich uncle who makes him an offer: the uncle will pay off Alec’s debts if he agrees to live in Nova Scotia for a year. The uncle will make all the arrangements: plane ticket, work visa, place to live, etc. All Alec has to do is stay in Nova Scotia for a year.

OH NO! WHATEVER SHALL I DO?!? WHAT AM I GOING TO DO IN REMOTE NOVA SCOTIA FOR A YEAR AFTER ALL MY FINANCIAL CONCERNS ARE TAKEN CARE OF?

HOWEVER WILL I SURVIVE IN SUCH A HORRIBLE PLACE?11?!?

I BETTER THINK IT OVER.

*eyeroll*

He finally makes his decision after getting chased by mobsters trying to collect on his debts. ...like I said. He’s a fuckwit.

So he moves into this beautiful house in Nova Scotia. There’s no internet, which is a legit bummer, but his uncle has arranged a car for him to get to town. Seems like a pretty good gig. Even if it is going to be brutally cold come the winter months.

Well as soon as Alec arrives in town, everyone seems to know and be expecting him. He puts an ad out for his mechanical engineering services, again, under the name “The Healer.” Well........... that goes awry in ways you would expect. Suddenly, people start showing up requesting his physical healing services.

The thing is, the people from town seem to expect him to actually be a healer. They keep referring to a secret and to him being “the chosen one.” There’s no explanation for this.

Then there’s like... this whole weird interlude where Alec seems to kill the town priest, played by Jorge Ramirez (can someone please find this dude a good acting gig? my dude has decent comedic timing, he’s better than this shit). And Alec gets arrested. Even though the priest got up and walked away. All of this seems like a weird spinning of wheels before the actual plot. Like why is this happening. Why?

Eventualllllllly......... his uncle shows back up and fesses up (in the most elaborate way possible). People in his family have a gift. Every other generation, someone is chosen. And they have the gift of healing. Based solely on being near to someone who is destined to be saved.

The gift can only be activated around their 30th birthday (if this sounds unnecessarily elaborate, that’s because it is -- and I’m even cutting shit out like the secret basement and portraits on the wall, blahblahblah). The day after the birthday, the chosen one must decide. They can choose to accept or decline the gift of healing. Alec is given until midnight that night to make his decision. WILL HE BE THE CHOSEN ONE? WILL HE BE THE HEALER?!?!1?1

I mentioned that Alec is a fuckwit right?

*Hagrid voice* YOU’RE A FUCKWIT, ALEC!

*squints*

Annnnnnyhow. Alec goes to the town church where everyone is gathered at midnight (with thank you signs and a big round of applause) and he dashes their hopes. HE WILL NOT BE THE HEALER, NO! Even though it comes with no readily apparent downsides or costs. And he’d be able to relieve the suffering of others with no cost to himself. No, fuck it. He’s going to go home.

The town takes it pretty well, all things considered. The few people who had already been healed by being near him make speeches of gratitude. They all wish him a happy birthday and tell him he’s welcome to stay. Like these people are insanely understanding about him declining the gift of healing. INSANE.

It’s worth noting that we’re about halfway through the movie at this point and we haven’t met one of the main characters of the movie.

IN COMES ABIGAIL. Cancer kid extraordinaire. She is 14 years old. Her parents have driven 7 hours to see Alec. Their daughter is dying of terminal cancer, and all they want is for Alec to spend some time with her and give it a shot. But she’s a pretty self-possessed kid. She convinces the reluctant Alec to just hangout with her for the weekend to buck up her parents and give her parents some hope. She doesn’t believe in the healing, so no harm, no foul.

And finally we’ve hit the meat of our story. Will Alec be able to save Abigail now that he’s declined the gift? Will he regret it? WHY DID HE DECLINE THE GIFT!?1?

SPOILERS (really can’t discuss this movie without them)

It turns out, Alec had a brother who died of cancer. And they were incredibly close. In Alec’s words, “he was my everything.” But now he deeply regrets giving up the gift. Now he’s worried he can’t save Abigail.

You know what, man? Same.

SO WHY THE FUCK DID YOU TURN DOWN THE GIFT!??!?

Listen. Listen, listen. I don’t know a single person who has been touched by cancer who wouldn’t jump at the chance to have a healing gift. I mean, what the fuck. Death sucks. Losing someone you love from any kind of illness sucks. Especially when it feels even remotely too soon. And cancer is a particular type of FUCKING BULLSHIT. It sucks.

So it’s really fucking hard to understand why this FUCKWIT turns down the gift to begin with. Death and suffering is not abstract for him when this movie starts! So why we should feel sorry for his resulting anxiety, now that he has met someone who is directly negatively affected by his fucking BAD DECISION.

Anyhow, the rest of the movie is basically an exercise in how charming Abigail is and how much fun we can have with her before she goes off to die. Which like......... OH-FUCKING-KAY!

It should go without saying that this movie has a happy ending. The music swells where it should. The romance is consummated. Abigail is healed. All is going to be well with the world.

As a movie, this one has some weird fucking choices. First, all of the music cues in this movie are just wrong. “Faith” by George Michael is not a song about believing in something --- unless that something is having sex with someone who hurt you before. And the lighting in this film is so beautiful all the time, it looks like you’re in a fucking ciallis commercial, even when you’re in the freaking police station, wtf?

And last, the writing is just weird in places. Like why have the love interest lie about being a lesbian through 90% of the film? Why? It’s not a good joke! And It is COMPLETELY fucking baffling to me why the good news of this story is delivered off-screen instead of on-screen. If Abigail is going to be okay, why couldn’t she come back to Nova Scotia to tell him? Why couldn’t she deliver that news in person!? That’s just bad writing. What the fuck is that?

But whatever.

On the credit side, I think Oliver Jackson Cohen knows what he’s doing as an actor. He’s not Oscar-worthy yet, but I believed him. When he talks about his brother, I felt that. And that could not have been easy in such a fucking weird script.

But as much as I’d like to end this review right here, there’s more. Cause...

..........that’s not where the movie ends. Not entirely.

As the end music plays, the movie is dedicated to Paul Newman who established summer camps for seriously ill kids. And then we see images and videos of the kids all over the world enjoying activities at these camps.

And that’s where this critique stops. Sorta. Paul Newman was a legitimately good person. And his legacy of caring for sick kids carries on to this day, as was evident from all the footage.

But here’s the thing: healing as it’s depicted in this movie does not exist. But easing the suffering of others does. I wish this movie had been about that. I wish it had been less focused on miracles and weird family legacies and selfish fuckwits and more about the kind of healing that Paul practiced. But I guess that movie isn’t as fun, and it isn’t as hopeful and uplifting.

In the non-movie version of this story, Abigail Bryant died in 2014 at the age of 20. Her obituary still appears online. And it is still receiving comments and photos from cancer survivors and fighters, many of them who found her through the film. And they talk about how the movie touched them.

On that level, it doesn’t matter what I say here. It doesn’t matter that there are weird parts of this script or that healing like this is a fantasy. This movie does its job. It touches people. And if it inspires just a few more people to give money to help relieve suffering, then that’s all that matters.

Ronald McDonald House Charities Cancer Research Institute Hole in the Wall Gang (Paul Newman’s org) Serious Fun Children’s Network (established by Paul Newman)

#ptpt reviews #the worst movie on netflix right now #i guess #sorta #cw: cancer #sorry for the long post #this one was complicated

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3piox · 4 years

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The Jedi and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Plan

Making new post because that reblog chain was getting a lil long and I can talk about Ventress til the banthas come home:

What does the Jedi Order do with this?

They decide “we can use her as a tool. We will send one of our own to her, under false pretenses, and we will have him pretend to be a Fallen Jedi. We will have him inveigle her to train him in the secrets of the dark side. And we will have him use her to launch an assassination attempt on Dooku, killing him using his own student.”

This is a HOWLINGLY bad decision. It is morally dubious. It is grotesquely dismissive of Ventress as a person, it is NOT in accordance with the Jedi Code. This is a desperate, fear-based attempt at murdering their enemy using any weapon available to them.

Fear, of course, being the path to the dark side.

Asajj Ventress dies because the Order fucked up and gives her life to protect the vehicle of that fuckup.

It’s those kinds of decisions that should be laid at their door.

- @opinions-about-tiaras

Oh, yes. Now setting aside my more Doylist opinions on That Book (Golden is a hack, Asajj dying to further Quin’s story is tired sexist BS, anyways she’s a lesbian duh) something I do like about this terrible, terrible series of events is how thoroughly Obi-Wan roasts the Council at the end for their choices.

"We lost our way," Kenobi had said. "We lost it when we decided to use assassination, a practice so clearly of the dark side, for our own ends, well intentioned though they might have been. All that has happened since-Vos succumbing to the dark side, the deaths he has directly and indirectly caused, the secrets leaked, the worlds placed in jeopardy-all of this can be traced back to that single decision. Masters, I submit to you that Vos's fall was of our making. And Asajj Ventress's death is on all our hands. That Vos is here with us today, devastated but on the light path once more, is no credit to us, but to her. She died a true friend of the Jedi, and I believe that she deserves to be laid to rest with respect and care, with all gratitude for the life she gave and the life she has restored to us, and this bitter lesson that came at so dear a price. We are Jedi, and we must, all of us, always, remember what that means."

This scene is also very interesting when you contrast it to Ventress kinning Ahsoka when Ahsoka was framed for the temple bombings.

My master abandoned me, and that's exactly what you did to her, you and your precious Jedi Order.

Obi-Wan defends Quin where Ahsoka was failed. Ventress wanted the full pardon Ahsoka promised to argue for her, but Ahsoka losing faith in herself and the Council meant she never did try to speak in Ventress’s defense. Ventress still living on the edges of society meant she was in prime state to be used for this terrible, terrible plan.

"If we can take him, we can turn him back," Kenobi said.

"You cannot save everyone, Master Kenobi," Plo Koon said, not without sympathy.

Yoda nodded. "Save themselves, they must."

(...)

"You know as well as I do that there is still hope for him."

"I don't know that," she said bluntly. Kenobi was surprised. Mace Windu frowned, leaning forward. "You weren't there. You didn't see his face. You don't know how hard it is to come back from-"

"You did it," Kenobi interrupted quietly. Ventress paused in midsentence, her eyes looking piercingly into his. He could sense how stunned she was by his recognition of what she had done.

“He could sense how stunned she was by his recognition of what she had done.” Ventress saved herself, without being given any favours. I do understand in a general way why the Jedi wouldn’t offer her any. She has done horrific things. I wish they had decided to reward her from the start of this plan, however, even if they chose to keep her in the dark (hah) because of her lack of trustworthiness. Instead they just sit on an offer of a pardon until they need to reassure her she won’t be arrested for helping them get Vos back.

The Jedi assume that because she’ll be DTA (Down to Assassinate) she won’t have changed enough to earn forgiveness, despite the fact that Vos would get to stay a Jedi after hopefully beheading Dooku. Moral equivalence, and all that.

We owe Vos the chance to choose again, and, with our help, wisely.

We owe him that chance to choose again. “Anakin, this path has been placed for you; the choice is yours alone.” People make informed choices when all their options are clear to them. Thanks to Dooku and Ky Narec, Ventress knows the life of a Sith and of a Jedi. She can choose how she wants to live as a result -- but some material limitations exist outside her (i.e. her status as a war criminal.)

The Jedi come up with this terrible plan because they’re clouded by emotion -- the novel opens up with Dooku committing a mass murder and laying the blame at the Jedi’s feet. They react by doing what they’re always seen as both guilty and not guilty of: Taking action.

"Answer me this. How often has this Council sat, shaking our heads, saying, Everything leads back to Dooku? A few dozen times? A few hundred?"

You accept the ‘gift’ of a million soldier slaves to end a terrible war. You could also end that war by laying down your arms, accepting the consequences on your own small organization -- and the deaths of billions as they’re mowed down by droids. You choose to fight, and if you take that step, what’s so different about sending someone to kill the instigator of this war? Where do you draw your line in the sand?

To Quin’s credit, he does tell Ventress who he is and about the whole plan before any training or assassination plans take place. She agrees without needing any reward.

I think what really gets me is the point they bring up time and again, and Dooku himself sums up so perfectly:

"Our escape plans hinged on her?" Dooku exclaimed almost at the same moment, his lip curling. "The most abysmal assassin of all time?"

They can make all the noise they want about Ventress having gotten closer than anyone to killing Dooku -- at the end of the day, she’s still failed, TWICE, and that was with magic witches on her side. Why would they use her for this plan, for any reason other than she’s convenient. It’s lazy. It’s that ultimate allure of the ethically dubious: “It’ll just be easier if we do it this way.” If they really wanted to assure this working, why didn’t they just offer Ventress a pardon in exchange for Dooku’s itinerary, then send Mace and Yoda to dice the devil up? Seriously.

Also, this whole stupid book becomes Even More Pointless when you consider how fucking funny it is that after Learning Their Lesson here the Jedi decide that the perfect plan of action a whole 2 months later in RotS is to .................................. send Obi-Wan to kill Grievous. I mean, what, they weren’t worried just a little bit that Obi-Wan would end up sleeping with him instead and switching sides? 🤔🤔🤔

#asajj ventress #quinlan vos #obi wan kenobi #jedi #dark disciple #*#i hate this book sm #poor ventress deserves so much better #but lowkey they dump her body in the magic swamp that once resurrected someone #so like...........................ventress lives!!

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