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#and for some reason it annoyed the crap outta me when people thought it was 🤣
maleficusbonum · 3 years
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There are two types of people in this world:
Those that grew up knowing, full-well Anastasia (1997) was not a Disney movie
And those that cleary never paid attention to opening credits, so therefore thought it was a Disney movie
I believe u can tell which one I was
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Tf2 headcanons? Aw yeah! So let's say a new merc joins the team. They're a total asshole: Cocky, sarcastic, overconfident, refuse help. But both Spy and Scout see right through that, it's a defense mechanism. How do they go about making this person comfortable enough to not be an asshole?
*chanting* HURT COMFORT HURT COMFORT HURT COMFORT HURT COMFORT HURT COMFORT HURT COMF
Okay, jokes aside, this is one of my favorite tropes. Maybe I’m too naïve to believe that some people are just mean to be mean, or maybe it’s a sort of comfort to know that even the worst people can be understood, but either way, WOOOOOOOOO!
*****************
An Ass For An Ass
Headcanons
Scout:
To be honest, Scout’s threshold for asshole-ery is pretty high. Growing up with eight brothers will do that to you.
But when the new recruit came around, something immediately rubbed him the wrong way.
Recruit always stole his thunder with the crass jokes and over-the-top displays. Every battle turned into a competition, which messed with Scout’s system of fighting. He never had to focus much on his own team before, and now he had to worry about keeping his own reputation upheld while trying not to get stabbed, shot, or blown up.
Recruit also kept hitting on Miss Pauling - even after reminding them again and again that she was lesbian, and was not and never will be into dudes.
“Come on…you just haven’t been with a real man yet…”
“No, no, I’ve been with a lot of men. Real men. I just wasn’t into any of them. After a while, it was kind of obvious.”
But what really pissed a lot of people off was Recruit’s fighting style.
They were an absolute monster on the field - that’s why they were chosen - but every interaction was treated as some sort of survival scenario.
One would think that would be a good thing, but Recruit was ridiculous.
No matter what the situation was, he was fine, he was okay, he could take it, he could fix it.
He could be killed only inches away from a Medic because he would never yell for one. Sometimes Recruit would even show visible anger at being healed. It got to the point where Medic didn’t heal him at all, and just allowed him to die as to not waste time he could give too more grateful patients.
Missions were even worse.
He followed orders to a T, but Pauling had to beg him to leave a failed mission, or to leave without completely destroying the site.
Everyone just took it as Recruit showing off, or having something to prove as a rookie.
It was annoying, but ultimately harmless in most circumstances.
However, it all came to a head when Recruit tried disengage a sentry by himself and was severely injured.
Both Engineer and Medic, who had had to fix most of Recruit’s past and current recklessness, ripped him a new one, one chewing out after the other.
“What we’re you thinkin’, son?! One crossed wire and you woulda blown the whole base!”
“Zhe only reason you are allowed in my lab at all is because it’s in my contract. Personally, I vould have rather left nature to it…”
Since then, Recruit did exactly as he was told, and nothing else. And most of the team liked it that way.
But Scout recognized some warning signs immediately. Fatigue, near silence except for missions, self-isolation, snapping when people got too close…it all paved the way for a pretty nasty (and, for Scout, very familiar) result.
One night, Recruit was sitting on the balcony, and Scout came out with two bottles - a beer for Recruit and a root beer for himself.
(Scout can only drink on the weekends because one, unlike most, he can’t go to work hung over because his job requires a lot of movement, and two, he has no restraint and can’t stop once he starts.)
“What do you want?”
Scout shrugged. “Depends.”
“On what?!”
“What are ya willin’ to tell me?”
Recruit just looked at the beer and sneered.
“Can’t we just skip this?” Scout said. “Maybe get to the part where you tell me what kinda Sally Sob Story we’re dealin’ with here?”
Recruit looked away.
“Aw, c’mon, don’t tell me you don’t got one. ‘Cause you do. I can see it a mile away. So what happened? Pop leave? Somebody died? Lotta brothers and sisters? Ma had a few too many and smacked ya around?”
Recruit didn’t turn around, but Scout could tell he was crying. He had hit a sore spot. Hard.
“Hey, pal, listen…”
Scout trailed off, then slowly began again.
“…the only reason I know is ‘cause I’ve been through it, ‘kay? Outta everybody I knew, I only trusted me. And that was great when I did a good job, ‘cause I knew I put me there.”
Scout opened his bottle of root beer and took a long swig.
“But when I screwed somethin’ up, it’s like everybody I ever knew just let me down. The one thing I could count on was gone.”
Recruit looked at Scout with tears in his eyes.
“But ya can’t do everything by yourself,” Scout continued. “Believe me. I learned that the hard way.”
Scout laughed, but it was mostly to clear the air. He didn’t get serious very often.
Recruit hadn’t touched his beer, but was leaned over the balcony with his head in his hands.
Scout sighed and looked up at the stars.
“But here’s somethin’ that nobody told me - it gets easier, y’know that? You just gotta relax and cut yourself some slack.”
Recruit shifted uncomfortably. “But the Administrator said…”
“Yeah yeah yeah, I know what she said. Gave ya that whole speech about how bein’ part of the team means discipline and focus and whatever. It’s all bull crap. She don’t know the first thing about bein’ on the field. If she did, why’d she hire us?”
“Sh-she said my perseverance was an asset to the team.”
“Perseverance, my ass. You know what would be an asset to the team? Stayin’ alive for more than fifteen minutes!”
Recruit looked at his feet. He had blinked away his tears, but he still looked on the verge of falling apart.
Scout put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it a little.
“You’re a great fighter, Recruit. You’re one of the best…that’s why you’re here. You got nothin’ to prove to nobody. Not to me, not to the team, not to the Administrator…not even to yourself. You’ve made it, kid. You’ve made it.”
Scout slid his hand off Recruit and started to walk away.
“Hey.”
Scout turned to see Recruit in the process of opening his beer.
“Thanks.”
Scout smiled. “No problem, pal. Plenty more under Demo’s mattress.”
“No, I mean…for that. I needed that tonight.”
“Oh…yeah! Sure. Don’t worry about it.”
Scout went back inside and to his room - but not before checking the cameras on the balcony a few times. Just in case.
Over the next few months, Scout kept helping Recruit break some old bad habits.
Recruit learned to take criticism without getting angry, to leave tanked missions, and to take care of himself.
He still occasionally flirted with Miss Pauling, but it was now more of an inside joke than anything.
Recruit still isn’t perfect - he still cringes a little when he’s healed, and falls back into survival mode when times are stressful - but he is now a much happier, much healthier person.
Spy:
Spy’s asshole wasn’t a merc, per se.
They were more of an informant, usually giving out important facts about locations, missions, and a target’s history.
Sometimes they would even use the Administrator’s PA system to announce new rules and reminders.
This would be perfectly fine - after all, you get kind of tired of hearing the Administrator all the time - except for the fact that Informant was the most sarcastic, most nasally, most apathetic, most matter-of-fact person on earth.
Even outside of a work setting, which was rare because they stayed in their office most of the time, Informant would go out of their way to be as condescending as possible.
Especially to whoever they considered to be in the “less intelligent” category: Heavy, Pyro, Scout, Demo, and Soldier.
To all the “others,” he turned every briefing into a contest to see who knew more at any given time…which, of course, usually meant he won.
“Now, does anyone know where his address is? Come on, any takers? Yeah, I thought so.”
Unlike Recruit, which would only warrant a few grumbles here and there from the team, Informant was the subject of a lot of hissed complaints and terrible rants from even the calmest of members.
Informant was the only one who could get under Heavy’s skin - a personal pet peeve of his was being considered less intelligent or less of a human being because English wasn’t his first language, which Informant chose to remind him of constantly.
It began with a few simple jabs at his grammar or word structure, but once Informant figured out that Heavy wouldn’t hurt a fly outside of battle, the taunts grew more and more daring.
Heavy would usually ignore Informant, which would only exacerbate their need to be noticed. This led to some pretty nasty interactions - from spouting the statistics of Russia’s average intelligence to even saying Heavy was a disgrace to his country by being a literature major.
“How’s that Russian literature major treating you? You know - in America.”
Sniper and Medic had tried to set Informant straight, but Heavy refused to accept any help. This was something that was his to bear, and his alone. He knew that they both took their own helping of harassment.
But one day, Informant went a little to far.
He did the one thing you should never do: insult Heavy’s family.
“You mother and sisters can’t do anything more than wait for you. No wonder you’re the only source of income.”
Before he knew it, Informant was against a wall, struggling to breathe, blood running into his eyes.
Heavy walked away after the incident, and told Medic about it, but he refused to heal him. Informant had called Medic a Nazi on more than one occasion.
This, finally, is where Spy comes in.
Spy was walking by Informant’s office, when he heard a strange sound - barely suppressed hiccups and sobs.
Despite his aversion to displays of emotion, the promise of seeing one of his greatest enemies as their lowest was too amusing to resist.
He knocked lightly on the door, then slowly opened it - always the master of drama.
Informant was under their desk, bloodied and bruised, sobbing into their knees.
Spy entered noiselessly, sitting in Informant’s office chair and lighting a cigarette.
It was only when Spy made a dramatic exhale of the smoke that Informant looked up, tears streaking their face.
They stared at each other for a moment, and then Spy finally spoke.
“Oh, how the mighty fall. Flown too close to the sun, have we?”
Informant couldn’t do much more than snivel and retreat farther below the desk.
“Who did it?” Spy asked. “I want to give them my regards…and maybe a bottle of wine.”
“H-Heavy…”
“Oh? Well, if anyone can bring him to blows, it’s you.”
Spy put his feet on the desk and continued to blow smoke out of his nose, thinking.
“It’s strange,” he said. “Most offices have at least a few pictures of family. A trip to the beach, perhaps the zoo…?”
He took a quick glance around.
“No children. No army mates. No graduation photos or a large catch at a local lake. The only personal item you have is this…”
Spy picked up a Rubik’s Cube. The plastic still around it crinkled.
“Unused.”
Informant looked at the floor.
“I like to keep my personal and professional life separate.”
Spy pursed his lips and squinted.
“How noble of you. But I don’t think that’s the case. You know what I think, Informant?”
Spy took his feet of the desk and bent down, looking Informant in the eyes.
“I don’t think you have a life.”
Informant’s eyes went wide for a moment, then his face immediately crumpled. Bullseye.
Spy smirked and got up from the chair, starting to leave.
Informant’s sniffling turned into sobbing, and before Spy could put his hand on the doorknob, muffled wailing filled the office.
Spy closed his eyes and clenched his teeth. He was trying not to remember something. But the imagery was too strong.
He remembered hiding under a table, like Informant was. People screaming and cursing at each other in French. His knees all scarred and his nose runny from a cold that should have resolved weeks ago. Waltz music coming from next door, trying to drown out the fighting. Glass breaking. Biting his knuckles so he wouldn’t whimper or cry.
Spy’s hand closed into fist. He took a deep breath, and turned to face Informant again.
“But to be fair…”
He walked towards the desk, putting his hand in his suit pocket. He got on his knees and pulled out a pink handkerchief.
“…I don’t have one either.”
He offered the handkerchief to Informant, who put it to his face, still staring at Spy through red eyes.
The pair were silent for a moment, with Spy putting out his cigarette and lighting a new one while Informant cleaned themselves up.
“But the difference between you and I,” Spy said, his voice wavering a bit, “is that I am a Spy. If my information got into the wrong hands, it could be the end of me and my team.”
He tapped his cigarette on a nearby trash can, letting the ashes fall into it.
“But what are you hiding from?”
Informant took a shaky inhale, the handkerchief still covering his nose and mouth.
“W-what?”
“Why do you feel the need to be, as Scout puts it, a tier five jerkazoid?”
Informant sniffled. “I…I didn’t think I took it that far.”
“Took what that far?”
“I just…snrk…I thought that’s what I had to do to get them to take me seriously.”
Informant laughed, but their heart wasn’t in it.
“I’m five foot four with red hair and freckles. I look more like someone’s Andy doll than a contract killer. I thought maybe if I knew everything…I’d be worth it.”
They shrugged.
“At best, they’d be impressed. At worst, they would never get close enough to me to know the truth: the only reason why I’m here is because I can rattle off a few names and that I had good grades in school because I had nothing better to do.”
Spy’s chest ached. He didn’t know why, but it was a strange feeling to him.
“Mon ami…”
He cleared his throat.
“If half of the team is any indication, you don’t need to be Nikola Tesla to be hired. Hell, the fact you can read is an anomaly in itself. But there is something you must understand…”
Spy cleared his throat again. His voice had gotten quite unstable all of a sudden.
“Intelligence is measured in different ways. Scout could never read even the simplest of children’s books, but his physical intelligence - reflexes, spatial awareness, aim - is phenomenal. Medic would have to put my spine back together if I even attempted to do what he does on the field.”
Informant snickered at the joke, or perhaps the image it conjured.
“And me,” Spy continued. “I can speak almost any language, adjust to any social setting, charm anyone, fool anyone…kill anyone. Just like you, I can remember, and I use the information I absorb mostly to show how superior I am to all my lowly colleagues.”
Spy furrowed his brow and looked away.
“But I know less about myself than even my enemies. I have hidden it so deep within my mind that I can hardly remember…or perhaps would rather not remember…who I was before this mask of mine.”
Informant hesitated. “I…I’m sorry, Spy.”
Spy sneered and puffed a few smoke rings.
“I don’t want your sympathy. I want you to have some self-respect - and respect for my teammates. Because next time you are beaten within an inch of your life, you might catch me in a less generous mood.”
With that, Spy got up, reached into his suit pocket and presented a small MediKit, which he tossed to Informant.
“I’d suggest freshening up before going to any more briefings.”
Informant nodded, and set to work healing himself.
Spy started to leave, then stuck his head back in.
“And hang a few posters, would you? Your office looks like a prison cell.”
Finally, the Frenchman took his leave, adjusting his suit and nodding solemnly to the team members he happened to pass - or scowling at them, depending.
He glanced over the security feed, and once he was satisfied, made his way to his smoking room.
Spy closed the heavy oak door, poured himself a small glass of scotch, and sat down in his chair next to the fireplace.
He put a magazine on his knee and began to flip through the pages, but his gaze soon started to wander.
He closed the magazine, tossed it into the fire, leaned into his hand, and wept.
…So what became of Informant?
Well, after a reluctant heal from Medic and a few well-deserved apologies, Informant began to try and break the cycle of self-sabotage.
The process took a lot longer than Recruit’s did - especially since Informant’s transgressions were a lot more egregious - but, little by little, they began to heal.
A lot of the time, the other mercs would have to tell them to tone it down a bit, or to cut him off completely if necessary.
Informant still almost has a panic attack if he doesn’t have the right papers, and his office is still pretty bare, but he took Spy’s advice - a few AC/DC posters hang on the leftmost wall.
As for Spy, well…he needs to have a talk with Medic.
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I am so sorry…this is all so messy and weird. One is so much longer than the other, and I’m not even sure half the dialogue sounds right.
The two headcanons were just typed out at different times, the first where I had less motivation and the second when I had more motivation. This wasn’t on purpose, it just happened.
I hope you still like it, though!
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tendertokyo · 3 years
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My take on NCT at Hogwarts
what is it with me and being active on this god forsaken app all of a sudden... anyways, i know that we've thrown jk rowling in the garbage but listen i can't just throw away my whole childhood for one stupid rich white cis woman. also i have no idea what's going on with the neos but when do i ever? alright here we go
taeil: he's giving me frustrated hufflepuff, like he really wished to be in gryffindoor but it didn't work out. think he'd be a halfblood and have a pet toad. likes to visit hagrid for tea sometimes. simps over some bad bitch in slytherin, really thinks she's into him too, everyone tells him she's way out of his league. broke his wand twice already trying to open a can of sardines
taeyong: also strong hufflepuff energy. he's the keeper and captain of their quidditch team and a prefect too, picked purely cause he's good with kids. walks around without his scarf in the cold winter because he wrapped it around ten's neck one morning and nagged on him for not taking care of his health properly, never got the scarf back and doesn't mind. i feel like snape would intimidate the crap out of him, like he would not be able to stay calm during his classes rip. he'd be adored by all the other teachers though, especially flitwick who believes he's really gifted in charms
johnny: a gryffindoor pureblood and keeper and captain of the quidditch team. always the one who tries to talk things out with mcgonnagall when they pull some stupid shit and get caught, never successful. has the marauders map and likes to throw underground raves in hidden rooms and tunnels. buddies with peeves and the house elves. buddies with everyone actually. and regardless of liking him like that or not, every girl in school has fantasized of fucking him in the quidditch locker room showers ooooop-
yuta: omg the heartbreaker of the school. a halfblood slytherin prefect and beater. snape's favourite student, like he gets whatever he wants from that man without trying. everyone is lowkey into him cause of his hot and mysterious vibe and there are so many rumours about his sex life circulating around, but no one actually knows if he's seeing someone. people also speculate he's a metamorphmagus but no lol he just dies his hair a lot. has a pet cat who's mean to everyone except him and mark. likes to explore the forbidden forest cause he's a weirdo
doyoung: a ravenclaw pureblood who hates quidditch, only shows up for taeyong's matches and nags him afterwards if hufflepuff loses. he's the headboy and happily uses his title to threaten haechan. hates divination with a passion and idolizes mcgonnagal, as he should. knows everyone's bussiness in the whole damn castle, never starts drama but almost always ends it. used to tutor some younger students but they quickly realised he's a mini mcgonnagall and zoomed straight outta there. snape lowkey wishes he was in slytherin but don't tell anyone
kun: gryffindoor headboy, probably the calmest person in that entire house and the only one who can kinda control the chaos. if yangyang or hendery annoy him too much he'll give them the wrong password on purpose, mcgonnagal has this unspoken respect for him for that reason. feels really bad for the house elves and wants to help them as much as he can. known as the dad or daddy of gryffindoor, depending on who you ask hehehehe
ten: the artsiest ravenclaw but fucking terrible at riddles, so he's always stuck at the door unless someone let's him inside lmao. is super into divination but purely for the aesthetic. never wears his uniform properly, always wears taeyong's scarf and lots of witchy jewelry. started a dance club in the room of requirement, loves hogwarts halloween with his whole heart. set a classroom on fire once and managed to sneak away undetected. always hooks up with someone at johnny's parties
jaehyun: the fucking fratboy of gryffindoor. he's a halfblood and a chaser on the quidditch team. left so many girls on read oh my god. sneaks alcohol and weed into school, coorganizes parties with johnny, yuta and mark. people think he's this hot bad boy or some shit, lol no bitch he's a dumbass don't waste your energy on a doofus like him, have you heard his laugh he sounds like a 45 year old man. mcgonnagall doesn't trust him at all, always looks at him with shifty eyes. the fat lady flirts with him everytime he approaches the commonroom door
winwin: on the snobby pureblood side of slytherin, like he gives off really judgy vibes. is in ten's dance club, there's a rumor going around that he's an animagus 'cause he moves gracefully like a cat or smth, but he isn't he's just really talented. spends most of his time in the owlery petting birds. the bloody baron freaks him out, most of the ghosts do. tried to be a big brother figure to renjun and chenle but they bullied his ass like crazy so he dropped them like hot potatoes
jungwoo: the most confident gryffindoor y'all. he's a muggleborn and a chaser. has the cutest pet owl, is really into care of magical creatures. snape hates him because he's too "sunny" of a person. wild at parties but looks fine in the morning somehow. the biggest flirt you'll ever meet and has so many bitches wrapped around his little finger lol, there's a rumor going around that he's real beast in bed. awesome at dueling, uses his cute airhead shtick to apsolutely destroy people. can you tell i love his pisces ass?
lucas: a hufflepuff halfblood and beater. wannabe fuckboy but can't because he cares too much lol, those muscles are made of feelings dawg. hits on every girl he sees and is almost always successful 'cause we're weak for cute and sweet himbos. is the biggest show off on the quidditch field and has his own fan club. really into care for magical creatures, like literally wants to befriend every single one of them, hagrid has to pull his ass away from them before he gets hurt rip
mark: a gryffindoor prodigy, a muggleborn and a chaser. the most stressed prefect you've ever seen. mcgonnagall has a soft spot for him and everyone knows it. snape dislikes him but respects him because he's fucking brilliant at potions. a lot of people like him and are into him but he doesn't know how to respond to them lol socially awkward king. plans parties with johnny yuta jaehyun and ten, is always roped into the dreamies schemes against his will. no one can fucking tell if him and haechan are on good terms cause they're at each other's throats all the time, but slobber all over each other like crazy when they get drunk
xiaojun: the most emotional ravenclaw. a halfblood and a prefect. he dated a girl for a long time and she broke his heart, moped about it in the prefect's bathroom for ages. lowkey believes she cheated on him with yuta but isn't sure, is extra weary around him though. says he's done with love but then simps over a new girl every two weeks smh. no one understands how he's such good friends with hendery and yangyang, like the combination of the two of them is a recipe for disaster. whenever they rope him into their bullshit, he always manages to drop their asses in the perfect time and doesn't get caught. many portaits are jealous of him 'cause he has better bone structure then them lol
hendery: the best definition of a gryffindoor. comes from a rich pureblood family, is a beater on the quidditch team. he's the life of the party, man. out of all the students he hates, he is the one snape hates the MOST and he's so proud of that. a really fast runner so he never ends up in detention 'cause it's just too hard to catch him. buddies with the ghosts and hagrid. tries really hard to impress girls, it only works half of the time when he's not being too intense
yangyang: also a gryffindoor pureblood, tried out for the chaser position but didn't make it, is still bitter about it. has a really fucked up owl that always messes up his letters. constantly in detention, like he's cleaned that entire castle by himself 43 times already. also in ten's dance club, also really good at dueling when he actually tries. really into muggle culture, explores it in his free time and shows everyone cool, new music he found all the time. gives kun daily headaches cause he's way too energetic in the morning
shotaro: imma say he's a hufflepuff but don't quote me on that cause i don't know him that well. he seems like he'd have lots of friends though and would be in ten's dance club
sungchan: don't know him well either so i'll just say gryffindoor??
renjun: i'm torn between ravenclaw and slytherin, gonna go with slytherin for him. he's a halfblood and a prefect, also uses his title to threaten haechan. loves defence against the dark arts anď herbology, might become a healer someday. gets tricked by the moving staircases all the fucking time, ends up at madam pomfrey's way more than he likes to admit. likes the slytherin aesthetic but can't stand the evil stereotypes. most people think him and chenle are brothers, wants to strangle chenle when he plays into it. once told the bloody baron to fuck off, no one dares get on his bad side since that day
jeno: pureblood hufflepuff prefect and a chaser. he's the cute, athletic guy everyone has a crush on. is on snape's good side 'cause he likes cleaning up his brewing station after finishing the task the lession is about. is the best flyer in the entire school and has the best chance of getting scouted in the future, everyone knows it but if you mention it to him he blushes like crazy. i feel like he's been in many fwb situations but they all ended well because he's a gentleman
haechan: a slytherin through and through. halfblood and seeker on the quidditch team. thought he was gonna be prefect and was hella pissed he wasn't chosen, i mean hello you're a snake who would want to give a snake authority goddamn it. also always complains during quidditch matches, calls everything a foul just 'cause he wants to win. puts up this persona of the mischevious slytherin boy but it falls flat on it's ass because he's peeves's favourite target
jaemin: a muggleborn hufflepuff, because of that reason he's sworn to himself he'll take care of jisung like a mother. a chaser on the quidditch team. such a sweetheart my gosh, like that dude is always so happy, unless he hasn't drunk his 6 cups of coffee. speaking of, mcgonnagall and pomfrey worry for his health like crazy but won't admit it. excells at care for magical creatures and charms, horrible at ancient runes like he didn't think there'd be so much math involved. girls are also crazy into him but he's such an introvert, the thought of someone wanting to be around him so much scares him. still flirts with everything that breathes lol
chenle: a slytherin and a pureblood, from one of those rich old families. because of that people expect him to be a lil brat, turns out to be the coolest guy you'll ever meet. he's friends with everyone regardless of house, a chaser on the quidditch team, known as the one who scores the most points in a game. he's great at defence against the dark arts and transfiguration, is thinking about becoming an auror 'cause that dude fears nothing i'm telling you. was made a prefect instead of haechan, rubs it in his face like crazy, but ultimately just let's people get away with stupid shit like "haha nice one, respect". memorized all the secret passageways of the castle in his head, helps johnny, mark, ten and jaehyun with their parties. pisses off filch like no other, was in detention all the time with yangyang until they realised how terrible it is when the two of them are in close contact lol so he gets let off the hook all the time. also fucking flirts with everything that breathes, the biggest fucking tease like you never know what he means smh
jisung: jaemin's muggleborn hufflepuff son, though most people are surprised he isn't in gryffindoor 'cause god the reckless shit that boy pulls... always late to breakfast with his uniforn all messy. people think he's very innocent but like his bestfriend is chenle, so how pure could he be. he's a seeker on the quidditch team, goes extra hard during hufflepuff-slytherin matches 'cause he wants to knock haechan off his high horse. blushes like crazy whenever he sees a cute girl which only gives chenle more reason to tease him 'cause he's a lil bitch like that. is the star of ten's dance club but has tripped and fallen down multiple flights of stairs, this kid's a walking paradox
to conclude:
gryffindoor: johnny, kun, jaehyun, jungwoo, mark, hendery, yangyang, sungchan
hufflepuff: taeil, taeyong, lucas, jeno, jaemin, shotaro, jisung
ravenclaw: doyoung, ten, xiaojun
slytherin: yuta, winwin, renjun, haechan, chenle
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danijimenezv · 3 years
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His Biggest Fan
Summary: A little rewrite of the vending machine scene from OH1 Ch1. This was inspired by the replay for the Open Heart Book Club.
Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x MC (Jillian Valentine).
Word Count: 2216 words.
A/N: I followed a lot of the game script but also added a little. I merged a few choices because I'm an indecisive little shit that loved both options 😂 And I also hated that Landrat kept Ethan's autograph, so I fixed it. As always, feedback is much appreciated! (please, I crave it)
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“Wait! It’s you, isn’t it?”
“What?” Jillian furrowed his eyebrows at the other intern’s exclamation, deeply confused. On the outside, her face was a perfect mask of calm, but on the inside, she started to feel a wave of anxiousness threatening to suffocate her by the thought of being recognized.
“You’re the intern who did the thoracotomy with him this morning?”
“Yeah.” she shook her head, letting out the breath she had been holding, “And he ripped me a new one in front of everyone. It was so unbelievably-”
“Lucky!” Landry exclaimed, earning a puzzled look from her, “Ethan Ramsey actually talked to you! Ugh, this is what I get for getting to work an hour early. If I saw him in person, I’d probably just…”
As much as Jillian admired the man, she really couldn’t understand how Landry could describe her humiliation as a moment of luck. She was many things, proud being one of them, so she only felt indignant about what had happened that morning, nowhere near as happy as Landry.
“It was intimidating.” she shrugged, but raised an eyebrow when Landry froze up, staring wide-eyed in panic, “Landry? You okay?” he pointed past her, and as she turned around, she saw him there, talking to a nurse down the hall, the one and only Doctor Ethan Ramsey, “Crap, he’s coming this way. Hide me.”
“Hide you?! Hide me!” Landry squeaked.
“Jillian, stop.” she ordered herself, gathering her pride and dignity, “What am I doing? I can’t let my first day go like this. Okay, I’m… I’m gonna go talk to him.”
“The man once tore apart the research of the A.M.A.’s president… during the president’s keynote address! Are you sure about this?” Landry gasped.
“Landry, sometimes you just gotta… risk it.” Jillian grinned, “I’m always sure about what I do. It might not be the brightest idea, but at least I’m sure. I’m doing this. Would you let me borrow your copy of his book?”
Landry only nodded, still shocked in place. After taking Landry’s copy of Diagnostic Principles, Jillian marched down the hall toward Doctor Ramsey, who had stopped by an elderly patient’s room. Even from the hall, she could hear the patient hollering.
“I’m not going to ask you again, Barb.” Ramsey said tiredly.
“Forget about it, Doctor Ramsey. I’m busting outta this joint. I’ll tie the bedsheets together and rappel out of the window.” the older woman threatened.
“Don’t wait up on my account. In fact, I might break out of here with you.” for the first time, Jillian saw Ethan smiling, which surprised her and dazzled her in equal parts.
“I mean it! I don’t have my favorite armchair, and I’m bored without my puzzles.”
“And I’m bored of your excuses, Barb. Whine all you want, I’m not going anywhere until you take your medication.”
Ethan muttered to himself as he walked away from the entrance of the room and headed to a vending machine in the hall. He slid a dollar bill into the machine, but just stood there with his arms folded, not selecting anything.
“Hi, Doctor Ramsey.” Jillian approached with the most charming smile she could muster.
He glanced up at her for a split second with bemusement, before looking back at the machine, “Rookie. Back there, were you… hiding from me?”
“No, I don’t hide.” she stated confidently, showing the book, “I was actually hoping you might sign this book.”
“Autographs? Don’t you have work to be doing? Or at least other attendings to irritate?”
“Nope, just you.” she grinned, knowing it would only push his buttons.
“Interns.” he sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose, “I should have guessed. Well, if you have something else to say, then say it.”
“I just wanted to tell you I’m your biggest fan.”
Jillian hated to admit that; after all, it irritated her immensely when people said that about her parents or older siblings. She knew idolatry was pointless and frankly annoying, but for some reason, she wanted, needed, Ethan to know just how much she admired him and how much he had played part in the decision of becoming a doctor. She shared the same love, intrigue and aptitude for medicine as her family, but after much research, she knew becoming a doctor, a human one, was her calling. And the formidable Ethan Ramsey had inspired her enough to stand up to her family and choose her own path.
He still didn’t look away from the vending machine, half-listening, “My biggest fan? Is that right?”
“I’ve read all your papers: systemic amyloidosis, Lesch-Nyhan Syndrome, spinocerebellar ataxia…” at that, he turned to look at her directly, and Jillian straightened her posture slightly, refusing to back down, and instead held his sharp blue gaze, “You inspired me to go to medical school.”
“That ataxia paper was my undergrad thesis. That medical journal isn’t even published anymore. You tracked that down?” he seemed impressed.
“I can give you my copy… if you’d like.”
The way her voice had dropped to a sultry tone made it seem like she was offering something far less innocent and far more appealing than a simple copy of one of his papers. He tilted his head, intrigued for a moment, and then turned back to the machine.
“That won’t be necessary.” Ethan cleared his throat, and glanced back at the snacks display, “But I don’t think that’s what you came here to tell me.”
It was Jillian’s time to look intrigued. Over the years, she had perfected the art of hiding her thoughts and concealing her emotions with polite smiles and bored looks. She knew how to play the manipulation game with closed eyes, even if she didn’t do it frequently. But what had thrown her off base was that, somehow, Ethan could see right through her. The way he read her wasn’t something she was used to, and she still wasn’t sure if she liked it or not.
“Okay, I also came to assure you that I won’t let you down again.” she conceded.
He didn't even bother to look at her this time, “You can see the future? If so, you’ll make a remarkable physician.”
“Of course not. I just meant–”
“You will let me down again, Rookie. What’s more, you’ll let yourself down. Over and over.” he interrupted her and Jillian looked away, starting to regret even trying to talk to the man, but at last, Doctor Ramsey turned to stare directly at her, his blue eyes connecting with her honey-colored ones, “But what matters is that you get back on your feet each and every time, and push yourself to be better.”
Jillian was rendered speechless. She hadn’t expected him to give motivational and helpful advice, but here he was, proving her he wasn’t just another heartless, arrogant, know-it-all doctor as she had first gathered. Though she took his advice to heart and imprinted it in her brain, she didn’t dare say anything in return. After a few seconds in silence, she noticed how his eyes kept flicking to the chocolate bar in the top corner of the vending machine.
“I was always a salty snacks kind of girl myself, you know, popcorn, chips, that stuff.”
“That’s truly fascinating, but I’m not-”
“I know you’re not getting something for yourself.” Jill interrupted him, “You’re trying to pick something to cheer up Barbara in there, right?”
“How’d you figure that?”
“Just paying attention.” she mused with a soft smile, “You know, I bet I could pick out just the thing.”
“I doubt it. Barbara’s even more stubborn than you. She’s refused to take her pills for two days. But be my guest, it’s a hopeless endeavor.”
He didn’t think she could do it. In fact, he was looking at her like he was expecting her to fail, and not specifically in Barbara’s case. Jillian straightened her back at the challenge and scanned the contents of the vending machine. Her honey-colored eyes glinted in delight as soon as she spotted the hot cocoa. It was, after all, a comforting classic, and one of her personal favorites. Without a second to waste, she pressed the numbers for the chocolate. The machine whirred and the cocoa powder pack plunked out into the tray.
“Hot chocolate?” Doctor Ramsey looked down at her with condescendence, wanting to scoff at her cliché choice.
Jillian filled up a mug with hot water from the machine at the nurses’ station, and stirred in the cocoa. Once she made sure the drink was ready, she handed it to Ethan.
“How exactly is this supposed to-?”
“Come on, Doctor Ramsey, it’s hot chocolate. It’s bound to work, especially if she’s feeling restless and homesick.”
“That’s a big guess you’re taking there.”
“Don’t be so stubborn.” Jillian chastised him, “Look, just give it to her, okay? Trust me.”
“I don’t trust you.” he muttered.
“Well, you could always keep trying your way, but you don’t seem to be too successful at that either.”
He narrowed his eyes at her, but still took the mug and headed back into Barbara’s room. Jillian rested against the wall for a few minutes while she waited for him to be back. He soon returned with a perplexed look on his face.
“That got her to take the pills. I can’t believe it.” his mouth fell open in shock and he blinked a few times, “So, are you gonna tell me how you worked that one out?”
“Nope.”
“No?”
“A girl’s gotta have some secrets.”
Because if she had read him right, and she definitely thought she had, Ethan Ramsey was the kind of man who liked being in control of the situation and having answers to everything, down to the minimum detail. Why make it easier for him? She could keep him as frustrated as he made her feel. It was only fair.
“You’re really going to hold out on me?”
“I’m going for an air of mystery.” she flirted, “Is it working?”
“Mildly.”
Despite his best efforts, Ethan couldn’t help the smile that broke out into his face. It was hard not to respond in some way to the joyful expression on her face that made her eyes sparkle and turned her cheeks a lovely shade of soft pink. He caught himself after a few seconds, and looked away to compose the direction of his thoughts.
Jillian hadn’t noticed any of this, too occupied staring at the machine to avoid focusing on the handsome attending in front of her. It was then that she saw there were still 50 cents left over from Ethan’s dollar. She turned and pressed the numbers in the machine, and took the chocolate bar he was previously eyeing from the tray.
“And who is that for?”
“You.” Jillian tossed him the chocolate bar. He grabbed it with ease, but with raised eyebrows and a confused expression on his face, “I saw you kept staring at it earlier. You know, it’s okay to treat yourself sometimes.” He looked down at the chocolate in his hands with surprise, not having expected her to be that considerate with him.
“I’ll keep that in mind.”
Jill turned to walk away, “See you around, Doctor Ramsey.”
“Wait.” he stopped her and motioned for the book, “Give it here.”
He took Landry’s copy of Diagnostic Principles and turned to the nurses’ station to look for a pen to sign it. However, Jillian wasn’t the only observant person in the room. With just one look at the condition of the book, Ethan knew it wasn’t hers. He didn’t know her personally, but Jillian looked like the kind of perfectionist who would never highlight or write in a book, the kind of person who would take care of a book as if it was the most valuable possession and have it in perfect condition. That book in his hands had a lot of markers and scribbles, some pages were folded, and part of the cover was peeled off. It definitely didn’t look like her book. So, he signed the first page of the book, but additionally took a post-it from the nurses’ station and scrawled a quick message on it for her, before he returned and tossed the book back to her.
“Now get back to work, Valentine.”
That made her stop in her tracks, her honey-colored eyes wide in shock, “You remembered my name?”
“Just paying attention.” he threw back at her with a smirk before walking off.
Jillian opened the book in curiosity and read Ethan’s inscription on the post-it.
‘For my biggest fan. Don’t let me down. ~Dr. Ethan Ramsey.’
A bright smile lit up her whole face, and she quickly took the post-it and put it in her pocket, before returning to Landry and showing him the book.
“You’re still alive!” he shrieked in surprise, “And… I can’t believe it, you got my copy signed! I absolutely love it.”
Landry charged forward and squeezed Jillian in an awkward hug, causing her to flinch in discomfort and pat his back a couple of times before pulling away.
“Okay, yeah, you’re welcome…” she tried to smile politely and make up an excuse, “Come on. I’m getting paged and, I don’t know about you, but I’m still completely lost…”
“Yeah, let’s go.”
Tags: @jamespotterthefirst, @missflashgeek, @openheart12, @takeharryandgo, @aestheticartsx, @choicesfanaf, @fireycookie, @the-pale-goddess, @drariellevalentine, @trappedinfanfiction, @tsrookie, @perriewinklenerdie, @genevievemd, @drethanramslay, @openheartthot, @lucy-268, @writinghereandthere, @rookie-ramsey, @missmiimiie, @ramseyandrys, @ruinedbypixels, @queencarb, @lovingramsey, @gryffindordaughterofathena, @ohchoices, @anntoldst0ries, @bluebellot, @schnitzelbutterfingers, @mysticaurathings, @iemcpbchoices, @itsjustamesshonestly, @shanzay44, @lsdw-blog, @liaromancewriter, @heauxplesslydevoted
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estrxlar · 3 years
Text
The Ghost Of You
01 - You’re Familiar
Tumblr media
This chapters songs:
Daughter Of A Cop; TV Girl
I Hope To Be Around; Men I Trust
Weird Fishes/Arpeggi; Radiohead
— Y. L. Perspective
My breath got louder and louder each second I ran. With my bento box hitting my hips, bag tossing around, and my skirt flying up, there was no way things could get any worse.
But luckily just around the corner, I spotted students climbing onto it, which made my feet run even faster.
Near late on my first day? Damn, Y/n, way to start your year.
   Just then, I heard the sharp hiss of the engine, sending me faster towards the vehicle than I had been pacing myself before. But still, the driver was ignorant, obviously not caring how much I needed this. It wasn't like my parents would take me anyways.
"WAIT..! PLEASE WAIT!" I started on the side of the bus, running side to side with the wheels. After a few seconds of loud disruption, it finally stopped. The break was hard, and students inside were heard making remarks of protest.
Sure, I felt bad for the people who had to get a brake check, but I on the other hand was completely out of breath and near dead. Couldn't they spare me?
"I'm, I'm so.. I'm so sorry I.." My breath is short, and loud while I breathe in and out, trying my best to try and explain my tardiness to the driver. He simply sighs, gesturing for me to seat myself already.
While I stumbled down the aisle, I received a few weird glances from fellow students. Some familiar and some new. I couldn't tell if it was because of my reputation, or because I looked like a hot mess. Either way, it was too early in the morning for one to give a damn. And so, I seat myself next to another student, finally resting from the marathon I had just run.
I sighed, rolling my head back, and placed my fingers on my temples. 'I probably look like a mess right now.' I thought, letting out a huge sigh. Once I sat my fingers back down onto my lap, I observed more of the people I was surrounded by.
Some third years I was familiar with, a few that wouldn't dare speak to me, and some that were strangers. Other second and first years I didn't know at all; throughout high school, I thought it'd be best to stay hidden and introverted, especially if I were to become popular in the music industry. Lots of young stars still went to school, and usually got dirt easily thrown onto their title and that's exactly what I would avoid this year.
Bringing me back to reality, I capture a peek coming from the boy I was seated next to. He had fluffy gray hair and seemed just as tired as me. But the bus was so dark, I couldn't completely make out his features.
"Something wrong?" I said to him.
He jumped a little, adjusting his eyes back down to his phone. "S-sorry, I didn't mean to stare. I just- I think I know you from somewhere."
"Lots of people know me, buddy—" I lifted my head, facing him. 'Hey, this guy does pretty familiar. But there's no way I'd forget a face like his. Then again, I have the memory of an 80-year-old woman.' I think to myself, examining his features in an awkward mood.
"Wow, it is you. (Y/n), it's been quite a while!" He smiled widely, reaching a hand out to me. I only froze, too confused to comprehend the situation. "You have no idea how glad I am to see you're doing well!"
"I-Im sorry?" I question, wondering why a stranger would confront me this way. But something was off— I knew him, I just couldn't remember where from. Maybe from previous classes, or from a concert?
He turns slightly, growing a smile on his pale face. "I was trying to figure out if it was you or not, but it is! It's great to see you're better. How are you?"
"Who are you?" I ask back, a bit frightened.
"Uhm, well, I sat next to you in math class during my first year. Remember? I was a little ditzy, kind of annoying, I never shut up about volleyball..?" He asks, hoping to get a hint of nostalgia. "Come on, you've gotta recognize me, right?"
"Wait, Sugawara!" My finger jumps out, pointing to his sitting figure. "I'm sorry I couldn't recognize you! It sure has been quite a while. But I definitely remember you, now! You were one of the people who talked to me during my first year.. thanks for that. Anyways, how've you been?"
"I think that's my line, L/n." Suga pats my shoulder, then places his hand onto his lap. "You've changed so much! I've gotta know how you're doing!"
"I-I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing in your perspective, but thanks anyway. I've been doing just fine." I explain before a yawn escapes my mouth. Sure, this conversation was energetic, but I certainly wasn't.
"Again, so very sorry for being so forgetful. I don't remember much from first year, especially not anything in math, but I sure do recognize you now." I say, hoping my rudeness from before wouldn't have any effect on how he viewed me. Not that I cared, of course.
Luckily, Sugawara was forgiving that day. With a wide grin, he replies, "No need to apologize. People change drastically during high school; we're no exceptions. Although, I would've enjoyed being mutuals with you throughout most of it! I wonder why I haven't seen you around until today... I believe the last time we had talked was around the last day of first year."
"Yeah, we didn't have any classes together. If we had, I'm sure we would have stirred up a discussion. You seem very kind. " I gently smile, rubbing the nape of my neck. I tend to forget any bad memories, and the beginning of high school sure was a fat one.
"What a shame, you too seem wonderful.." He comments, gazing towards me for a split second, before reverting his focus. "A-anyways, it's a bit of a surprise I saw you here. Have you always ridden the bus? I usually take it in the mornings as well."
"I've actually just moved into this neighborhood. My parents work more hours than ever, so they decided it's best if I'm closer to school so that I can get to school and back quickly." I explain, tapping the sage green bento in my lap, before setting it on my side.
Sugawara nods, understanding the circumstances. "That makes sense. I'm sure you'll enjoy it now that you've got a friend in the neighborhood. Although, a girl like you must be quite familiar, right?"
'Is that intended to be disrespectful, or am I just tripping?' I think to myself, asking him to spell out the meaning of that remark. "I'm sorry, what? A girl like me?"
"Oh, crap! I didn't mean that to sound rude— I meant because of your band! I understand you guys are the talk around school, considering you're getting pretty popular in the field."
A sigh of relief leaves my lips, preparatory to my correction. "Oh, my band. I'm not sure I necessarily make friends, more like connections and acquaintances. Only a couple of students know about the band, and usually just the down-low ones. But enough about me, what about you, hm? I assume still volleyball obsessed."
I had obviously steered in the wrong direction with our conversation, for Suga's aura quickly altered at the mention of the sport. "Eh, I'm not as excited about it as I used to be." He says, along with a hint of dissatisfaction in his raspy voice.
"No way. What happened to cheerful Sugawara who asked me, the lamest, to join the girls' team?" I ask, hoping a bit of that childish personality was still inside the older version of Suga. The one which was taller, more masculine, more of a man than before.
"Honestly, can't tell you. 'Teams has been a mess ever since I've joined." He leans back in his seat, stretching his arms out, before placing them around his neck from behind. "We're hanging on my a very thin thread."
"Dang, that really sucks. You never know, things can always turn out better." I say, doing as he did, and resting against the leather seats.
"Yeah, of course. I guess it's pretty hard to keep going after so many fails, haha." A sad chuckle leaves his mouth, as he sighs.
"Anyway, nice talking. I'm outta take a quick power nap; I barely got sleep last night. Mind waking me up when we get to school?"
"Yeah, of course," Sugawara replies. With that, I'm left with laying music in my ears like always, and nodded off to slumber.
"Hey, sleepyhead. We're at school," I hear someone say, feeling a tap of a cold finger on my nose. Almost immediately, I shoot up from my position, standing directly above Sugawara while students leave the bus with their bags, having loud discussions of excitement. Was there anything more embarrassing than falling asleep on someone who ghosted you as a friend?
"Dear God, I'm terribly sorry." I panic, brushing down my blue skirt. "That happens on rides, it was a mistake."
"Oh, it's no big deal! Don't worry—" Suga chuckles, standing up from sitting. But before I could let him talk anymore, I started making my way towards the exit of the bus.
"Uhm, I've gotta go! Great talking, though. I'll catch you later, have a good day," I mumble, before frantically leaving the vehicle. 'What a morning.'
— K. S. Perspective
Before I could grant Y/n a polite goodbye, she'd disappeared in just a few seconds. But even so, the measly to,e I'd discussed with her was quite enjoyable. I couldn't believe how much she'd changed.
Long ago, the beginning of high school, Y/n was the type of girl you could barely see, as if she were invisible. I think the only reason I ever even noticed her was because we were seated next to each other in math class, and she immediately caught my attention. But thank goodness I had at least tried making an effort to talk to her, or else we wouldn't have had our conversation this morning. But it wasn't her fault she was so gloomy; supposedly she had lost someone close to her the year before.
Although our talk was brief, it still meant a lot to me. Especially since I was informed that she was finally happy. Looking down at the seat she used, there was a small box with a handle at the top, and a few anime stickers covering it.
'Is this what was making that loud tapping noise on the way here?' I asked myself, examining the box more. Small initials marked 'Y.L.' We're at the bottom, informing me it was Y/n's. At first, I considered handing it to our bus driver, but for the few years I've known him I learned he doesn't return lost things. And so, I leave the bus with it in my hands, ready to start my morning.
"Suga!" I hear a familiar voice call out to me. Looking up, I see my friend, Daichi, and another fellow behind him, Tanaka. The two of them jog towards me, with their scarfs unfolding in the wind. Both I had met in volleyball, and they've been my buddies ever since.
"Hey, Sugawara!" Tanaka exclaims, roughly slapping my back. The bento tosses in my hands, thankfully not spilling onto the floor. Unfortunately, he notices the box and snatches it right out of my hold. "Wow, feeling a bit girly, are we?"
I laugh in response, quickly taking it back. "It's not mine, it belongs to the person who sat next to me today. Hopefully, if I see her again I can give return it."
"Hopefully?" Daichi teases, as we all begin our walk towards the school doors. "Do you know her name?"
"Yeah, her name's Y/n. Know her?"
He lights up at the mention of their name, replying "Oh, I know her! That girl you never shut up about I in first year, correct?"
"Ha, yeah."
Tanaka doesn't understand, digging deeper into the situation. "What?! I've never known good ole' Suga to genuinely have feelings for a girl, unless it was some fling."
"I don't! I used to. There's a difference." I say, as we enter the building.
"If she rides your bus, then why don't you just give it to the driver? She'll probably go looking for it later at the end of the day. That is unless you wanna see her again.." Daichi teases me.
"You see, I would. But the bus driver is sort of a thief, and this girl has had a rough morning as it is. I just wanna be nice." I explain to him. Though a part of me did want to see her again and hope that we could talk longer than we did before.
"Sure you do," Tanaka says, patting our backs. "Listen, this is my stop. I'll catch you guys at practice?"
"Sure thing, bye." We say our farewells, and make our way towards the third-year halls. "What about you, Daichi? Got anything exciting happening this hour?"
"If stressing about volleyball counts, then yes! Most definitely.." He says, clearing his throat. "Watch, like, two people show up."
"Actually, Kiyoko informed us in the group chat that we've got at least four! That's better than last year, right?" I try my best to cheer him up, but it only made him even more nervous. I couldn't blame him. Too much was even more of a burden, but too little was a disappointment and would leave us exactly where we left off.
"It's okay, Suga. I have a lot of faith in our team. I know it's been rough lately, but as long as we try our best, we'll work this out." Daichi smiles, turning towards a separate hallway than mine. "I'm off to homeroom. See you later!"
"Yeah, see ya!" I'm left by myself, giving me more time to focus on what should happen today. - 1st, I have to go through each class and say hi to a couple of familiars, and hopefully not see anyone I've had a conflict with.
- 2nd, I had to give Y/ns bento back to them, but that could only happen if we happened to have a class with each other before, or if we had the same lunch.
- 3rd, volleyball tryouts were this afternoon. I had to make sure and represent myself as a role model, and make it clear I was vice-captain. I wanted nothing more than for the new players to feel safe.
But internally, I knew none of those plans would work out. Especially if I wasn't focused on them. Currently, all I could think about was Y/n, and how refreshing it felt to be around her again. When I was first around her was at the same time when things in my life started to fall apart, and my little crush on her made me feel better about it all. I guess you could say she was my comfort corner, even if she talked to me only once or twice during the week. And sometimes on her bad days, I would be able to at least get a laugh out of her, even if it meant making a complete fool out of myself.
All I wanted was for her not to harm herself or feel lonely, which took a quick turn towards me once the year had ended. Not only had my thing for her end, but my family soon fell apart after my mother had passed away. Of course, I still had my responsibilities like volleyball club and helping my younger sister and my father get through it. But it seemed that everyone would do their own thing, so I did the same. And for a while, I was lonely and didn't cope with the loss very well. Just like Y/n, I distanced myself.
This went on throughout my entire second year of high school, while she on the other hand started to get her life together. She started her band, made and covered a couple of songs, and finally healed from her hard year. Honestly, I didn't even really believe that she was in such a good state, but I was proven wrong today. Ultimately, she truly inspired me to pick myself up and start fresh. And now that she popped up so suddenly, I was back to square one.
'It's been a while, Y/n'
HEYYY SHAWTYYYS.
Give me notes.
SO, I've finally rewritten the first chapter of my fanfiction!! It took a while, but I did it. If you didn't know, I started this story about eight months ago, and I had no writing experience. Now that I'm reaching the climax of this story, I decided I should edit the chapter, especially since they sucked ass! Nothing much was changed, just far more detailing and extra feelings.
Overall, thanks so much for reading the first chapter. Please vote if you enjoyed it!! It helps others know that it's worth reading. And if not, no worries. Thanks anyways. I love you all so much!
- your friendly Suga simp
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cerberus253 · 3 years
Note
Is there a chance to become Drago's girlfriend, if, for example, you are just a sweet, most ordinary girl? Not a villain or anything like that. Maybe she is a master of extreme sports to get his attention. Or it could be a punk girl from the friends of Ice's team. But if she's just ... in high school? It is very difficult for me to imagine how, under the conditions of the events of the series, Drago can meet a girl, become interested in her, it is enough to know her as a person and fall in love.
Oh so like me?? XD (except that I’m 21 and straight outta a 2-year college)
The main qualities that one primarily needs are patience and understanding. If you have some sort of mental disorder or physical disability, one would also need to, more-or-less, understand and accept thyself as well, for you cannot help someone else without working on yourself first, at least to reasonable degrees. I say this because Drago WILL be a piece of work that WILL wear-and-tear the s/o down often with just how much mental and emotional work that the relationship will take; that’s just what happens with incredibly broken people, sadly. With that being said, one also needs to know when to put their foot down and not be stepped all over. Not only would Drago be personally impressed that you have a backbone, but it is also needed to help him through his problems, knowing how stubborn he is. So, if this “ordinary girl“ has these qualities, including the “sweet[ness]” you’ve stated, a romantic relationship is most likely possible.
With meeting, I want to say the most likely scenario would eventually be through the Ice Crew because, well, they are humans full and through, while Drago isn’t and has no interest in getting to know people on a personal level. I’m not saying the situation of the person going up to Drago directly and initially, saying ‘Hi‘ or the vice versa isn’t possible, it’s just highly unlikely and would only happen under very specific circumstances. Anyway, meeting the Ice Crew first would be the most plausible. How that introduction starts is up to the fanfic writer, but again, it should follow the listed characteristics of the individual that I’ve laid out, not some OOC crap-- but I also have to state you can do what you want! My words are not a Bible to follow; these are just my own thoughts and opinions!
Moving forward, I say “eventually through the Ice Crew“ because you’d have to have at least someone in the whole four group (this includes Drago) to encourage you to hang out with them. It is possible to always be going to the junkyard while no one really cares that you’re there, but that doesn’t feel good, does it? Like, of course Drago would rather not have you around, but include the Crew in that? Yeah, that’d be pretty debilitating to one’s psyche. However, if you want to do the story that way, go ahead; I ain’t stoppin ya. But I also have to add, what else is the individual going to do? Just sit in the background, eating popcorn, watching them like entertainment, like a weirdo? I mean, sure, but that’s not going to get you anywhere. What I’m trying to get here is you need something else to do aside from following Drago around like a mosquito, and the only other activity is either hanging out with the Crew in their off time, or go along a completely different route and just work in the junkyard or something. Ya need another reason to be at the junkyard often than just (trying to) hanging out with Drago because he’s going to use all his power to make you stay away since you’re technically not helping him with his endeavors; so, do a junkyard job, junkyard diving, hanging out with the Crew, or whatever because Drago would have little reason to argue with you at that point. “He could still try and scare you off, though.“ I don’t think he’d want to waste his time with scaring off one measly human, ya know, as long as they’re not THAT annoying. (”Whatcha doin’ whatcha doin’ whatcha doin’ whatcha doin’????” “GrrrRRRR! SHUT! UP!”)
Aaaaaanyway, doing whatever other activity one is doing at the junkyard, and occasionally expressing the desire to interact with Drago, as well as acting upon said desires, would be the better vantage point. So, if Drago tells you to go away and threatens you if you don’t, you can walk away like he requested, but still have a reason to be there in the premise. A lot of times to people your mere presence is enough to make someone happy (or at least keep you on their mind), whether you’re interacting with them or not. “Wouldn’t Drago want you to go far away, like away and out of the junkyard?“ Yeah, probably, but you can argue that you still need to do your primary activity, which doesn’t actually involved Drago to begin with. So, you’ll just step away from HIM, and by staying in the premise, it gives you (and him) and second chance to interact with one another sooner or later.
A lot of this occasional interaction, maybe increasing if Drago seems to tolerate you more and more, you could get on his good side, but be warned he will not admit he likes your presence because originally he really wouldn’t want you here if you have no use to him and his goal. But wait, making him happy IS something useful, right? Yeah, and he, deep down inside, knows it, but will deny it because he isn’t suppose to like humans to begin with. This is the point where Drago will start to become frustrated with his different desires and need, ones for his human half and ones for hi demon half, which I believe I have discussed before. You could also label this as your first Trial and Tribulation(s) with your patience, understanding, and kindness, for he will get more irritable and mean than usual. These events will also take a VERY long time to get through; he needs to be encouraged that it’s okay to be different, but still given a lot of time to digest that hard-to-swallow-pill fact. As a bonus, when these events do begin, you have the Ice Crew to talk to! They may not care about Drago at all, but they do care about you as a friend, so they can tell you what they know AND step in if Drago wants to physically harm you at any time. Befriending the Ice Crew first has many perks and very little downsides ;) At least, the Ice Crew inside my head does...
Gifts like edible treats, badass jackets, and (my favorites) getting decent food and making tents and decent beds for them (so they don’t have to sleep on hard tires and gross-old car seats) would always be great. Like, I personally like to think about making breakfast for them; the Crew would be like “Hell yeah!“ and Drago would be like “... I’m not thanking you, but I am hungry“ and then just sits by himself to eat because fuck you guys, he doesn’t have feelings (b-baka...).
I also want to say do not be afraid to express your enjoyment of Drago. Even when he’s in a sour mood, try not be reluctant to be around him. Yes, there is a good chance something will get physical in the bad way, but the point is you’re trying to show him you genuinely like him and want to help even if it’s not in the way he admittedly wants. It’s okay to be afraid of him, but not letting that fear get the best of you and going up to be nice to him will show him that not everyone hates him for being what he is and his negative aspects. Of course, like I’ve said, don’t let him walk all over you, so you don’t have to be kind ALL THE TIME, but you need to be able to discern when to be passive and when to be aggressive. It’s good to have a lot of the former, because compassion is what he needs, but too much of the later makes him harbor permanent resentment; resentment in general will happen, but it would/should be temporary. Like, ya know when one character says something critical to another, and it pisses that second character off, and they think about it a lot, but then they actually learn from it and that critical statement ends up being helpful to them? Yeah, that’s what I mean by “temporary resentment.“ Permanent resentment would lead to a relationship not too different than the one with his Dad.
A lot of the time you will need to be taking the initiative when doing activities, from talking to Drago all the way to suggesting hanging out outside of just normal junkyard stuff. It’s going to be a lot of work, but I feel like if done right, the payoff will be worth it. Drago will definitely be the territorial and controlling type, but by God will he love you; he would probably aggressively SMOTHER you that you will have no idea if it’s actually obsession or actual love feelings XD That may sound OOC of him, but... I dunno, I feel like he can learn to love and be scary flustered by/with it.
“Her heart was a secret garden and the walls were very high.“ - William Goldman, The Princess Bride
But, like, “Drago’s heart was a buried garden, the ground suffocating the very little life left, and the walls were very high and heavy.“
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cat-in-a-fedora · 4 years
Text
Reunion Falls
I think I found something for the reunion falls au of Gravity Falls on the original creator’s blog. The reblog and like functionalities weren’t working for some reason, and I couldn’t find it in the creator’s archive. I really like this, though, so I’m gonna put it here and give credit.
This was originally on @sailorleo, and I couldn’t reblog it for some reason.
`-i dunno, he’s like, really weirdly clingy, but when we’re together all he wants to do is talk about his band…
-dump him.
-dipper that’s the same advice you’ve given me for every boyfriend i’ve ever had
-then why don’t you ask mabel?
-fine, maybe i will. mabel, what do you-
-no actually i think dipper’s right you should dump him
-teen soos playing with baby dipper and getting all excited when he says his name
-it would work better if stan actually knew mabel was coming beforehand, but just couldn’t work up the nerve to tell dipper until the last minute. by some fluke, mabel arrives a day early, and makes contact with dipper while stan is out.
-stan tells dipper that at the time of his birth his parents weren’t expecting twins, and couldn’t afford to take care of two children at once. he only told the kid they were dead because he thought it might be easier to handle than the idea that his parents didn’t want him.
-what are you still doing up?
-’m makin’ a sweater for grenda. she’s bigger than me, so it’s taking longer. you had a nightmare?
-no big deal, it was just an anxiety dream.
-a what?
-it’s like a nightmare, but instead of being scary it just makes all your deepest insecurities a reality. grunkle stan says they’re the brain’s way of reminding you that life could always be worse.
-…that sounds dumb.
-yeah, well, life isn’t fair, mabel.
-that corduroy girl out sick today or somethin’?
-what? um, no! i was just, uh… i tripped. on a rock. a lot of rocks.
-oh c'mon, kid, you think i never got the snot kicked outta me in elementary school? i know a fist to the face when i see it. c'mere, let’s fix you up.
-what can i do, though? they’re all bigger than me, and if i tell the teacher i’ll just look like even more of a wimp.
-ha! if you don’t wanna look like a wimp, you should stop letting other people fight your battles for ya.
-but i can’t-
-now hold on. i know you can’t, you’ve got about as many muscles as a soggy piece of toast. but one thing i know about the world is that guys who were born bigger, stronger, and smarter are always gonna punch down. and guys like you an’ me are stuck right at the bottom like old gum. so if your wits can’t save ya, all there is to do is punch back up.
-….do you mean that metaphorically, or….
-i was wondering when i’d have to dig these old things up again! …see, kid, all I’m trying to say is, when the world fights, you gotta learn to fight back.
-oh, shit. we’re not getting anywhere like this.
-*gasp* dipper!!
-what??
-you just said the ’s’ word!
-so? we’re practically teenagers, mabel. we can swear.
-i have friends back home who won’t even say ‘crap’! you must be getting it from somewhere
-i don’t know what you-
-[wendy enters] AYYYYYY DICKWEEDS WHAT’S FUCKIN HAPPENING
-ugh, sorry about all that, man. i don’t know why robbie’s always such an asshole to you.
-you don’t think he’s like…..jealous of me, do you?
-HA! ohhhhh my god. oh my god you’re probably right.
-what, does he think I’m gonna like, steal you away? like he’s INTIMIDATED by me? …that feels kinda good, actually.
-oh man, can you imagine? dipper pines, casanova extraordinaire! refined older women such as myself just….COLLAPSING at your feet!
-grunkle stan, um…. where are my parents?
-uhh……….. they died.
-oh…. how did they die?
-they………………died.
-you know when you’re wearing just the vest without a sweater you kinda look like……. someone. it’ll come to me
-mabel, what did you do to the journal????
-what? you told me to pretend it was my diary!
-i said to PRETEND it was your diary, not actually use it as a diary!! you didn’t mess with the stuff inside, did you?
[cut to: a shot of the interior of the journal, filled with stickers and cute little drawings and tiny diary entries about boys and the like]
-…….nnnnnnnope.
-if you’re going to be a monster hunter, you’ve got to have a look.
-hey, i’ve already got THAT covered
-no, i mean a look that tells people you mean business. like what i’ve got!
-what’s more businesslike than a leopard wearing sunglasses?
-i can think of a few things. what about like, a jacket? or…. a jacket? something besides a big fluffy sweater.
-listen dip, we’ve only known each other for a few days so i’ll let you off the hook this time. but first rule of mabel? the sweater STAYS.
-ugh, fine, but you’re gonna overheat. hey, what about this? it’s big enough to wear over a sweater. and it’s got pockets!
-but does it have PERSONALITY?
-you can decorate it or whatever i don’t care.
-mabel, have you seen my gel?
-nope. why do you gel your hair, anyway?
-i don’t want my bangs to cover my birthmark.
-can’t you just cut them off?
-it’s part of the look.
-ohhh, the 'look’.
-soooooo dipper had a crush on you, huh?
-haha, yuuuuuup. he thought he was being super smooth about it too. 100% convinced i had no idea. oh shit, dude, you wanna see this valentines card he made me when he was like, seven?
-you KNOW i do!
-boom! check it. all the blackmail you’ll ever need on one piece of construction paper.
-oh my gosshhhhhhhhh…..wait,  "love, ty"?
-oh yeah, ol’ dipstick used to go by 'tyrone’ before he was dipper. just between you and me, dipper suits him better. tyrone is too cool for him.
-why’d he switch?
-dunno, really. he used to hate his birthmark, people would make fun of him for it, yknow? and then one day he just started being super cool with it. he like, reinvented his entire image around the thing. you should’ve seen him before that though, always brushing his bangs down over his forehead… well, at least he puts some effort into his appearance now.
-FUCK!
-KID!
-oh no.
-where’d you learn language like that?
-i… uh….
–…..wasn’t from me, was it?
-n-no! it was from…. nobody! i mean, you hear stuff around, and-
-WAHAHA! this is great! now i don’t have to keep my mouth shut around ya! and it isn’t even my fault!
-mabel, take out the trash
-booooooo!
-…aren’t you going to do what he said?
-sure, just as soon as i finish kicking dipper’s butt!
-i will dance on your grave, mabel.
-but…he’s your uncle. you should listen to him before he gets mad, right?
-pff, what’s ol’ stan gonna do, throw his dentures at me? (don’t tempt me, kid) half the fun of being a kid is not doing what adults tell you to do! consequences be darned.
-…paz, really, stan loves us. he’s not gonna like, hit me or anything. yikes.
-dipper, seriously, what the heck happened between you and gideon!
-i told you, nothing! he’s just a creep.
-oh, is THAT why he won’t stop talking about you? even on our dates! it’s WEIRD. ….you two aren’t like, exes or-
-ew, no!
-haHA! you dated gideon! gideon and dip-per sittin’ in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-
-we were FRIENDS, okay?? …sort of. i dunno. it was a long time ago.
-heyoooo my drama senses are tingling! now you HAVE to tell me! deets deets deets!
-uuugggghhhhhh fine
-dipper and gideon have been rivals since childhood, but back then it was on somewhat friendlier terms. they would get each other in trouble, start fights over nothing, ruin each other’s stuff, but they would always walk away with smiles on their faces, like an unspoken pact to annoy the shit out of each other forever. but things started to change after gideon found journal 2. dipper didn’t see him around with the other kids as often. his tactics got nastier. he started “winning” more often. things came to a head after stan started teaching dipper to box. one day when dipper and wendy were hanging out together, they ran into gideon, who took the opportunity to tease them mercilessly. when he started going after wendy, dipper socked him, hard, in the nose. “i dunno. i was really mad, but i think i also just wanted to prove i was strong. wendy was always protecting me, so i wanted to protect her back.” after that point, gideon declared them mortal enemies.
-stan and wendy were definitely elated at the fact that dipper punched gideon. stan probably tried to bake him a cake.
DOUBLE DIPPER
“BAM! look out party, this girl’s on a mission! and that mission is to find a summer getaway friend group. woah, huddling crowd of teenagers! that’s perfect!”
-paz is talking with everyone listening when mabel interrupts her. “heyo! guess who’s here, it’s mabel, and that’s me.” “…..that’s great, sweetheart.”
-mabel is really excited to make new friends at the party, but most everyone starts hanging around pacifica. mabel tries to make friends with pacifica but paz rejects her, saying “listen, youre new so i’ll fill you in. it might seem like people like you and are interested in you because youre 'quirky’ or whatever, but you’re just a cheap novelty. around here? i’m the one who matters. nobody ignores pacifica northwest. adoring fans?” paz snaps her fingers and the crowd begins to shove mabel out of the circle until she finally falls on the empty dance floor. defeated, mabel shuffles off to the only people not part of the crowd (candy and grenda) “you too, huh?” “don’t worry. when we burn, we burn together.” paz then steps up to the mic and points at them, shouting “hey everyone, check out this adorable new attraction! it’s the reject corner!”
“aww, we don’t need this. the true merit of a partymaster is knowing how to take the party with you. this calls for an impromptu sleepover!”
-mabel offers to cheer up her new friends by ditching the party and having a sleepover instead, candy remarks that they were planning a post-party sleepover together anyway, grenda says how she stole a raunchy romance novel from her mom- wolfman bare-chest. grenda shows off that the book has a full-color illustration of gerard, candy remarks how she wants one of her own, mabel remembers that they have an old copy machine downstairs.
-“i don’t understand. i’m having fun, but i still feel this burning desire to go back downstairs and make her suffer for her crimes. crimes against friendship and partying.” “hey, i know what’ll curb that thirst for vengeance! theft! look what i stole from my mom’s bedside table!” “grenda, you wild girl! this is perfect!” “and it comes with a full-color illustration! his pecs are holographic!” *all three girls scream* “aah!! he is so rugged and brooding, i want to take him home with me and make him my trophy husband!” “ooh, i think we have an old copy machine downstairs! that way we can all keep the poster! come on girls, let’s go make our dreams a reality!”
-the girls end up bringing gerard to life because fuck the laws of reality, he emerges and says “which of you fair maidens brought me into this realm?” candy points to mabel. “girls, i think the party is back on!”
-“hey, fursuit, i don’t know if anyone told you, but this isn’t a costume party. although that would explain YOUR outfit, mabel”, gerard gets angry and tries to defend her by attacking pacifica. pacifica gets a small scratch on her arm and shrieks “are those REAL claws?!” mabel and candy struggle with gerard and finally subdue him (after he loses an arm to the punch bowl) by stuffing him into a closet. “you can come out after you learn to stop being such a butt!!” candy makes some remark about “at least we didn’t make any more!” cut to grenda either using the copy machine or already surrounded by wolf men.
-after the gerard squad starts running wild at the party, mabel gets an idea. “grenda, they’ve already like, werewolf-bonded to you, right? so if you’re in danger, they’ll come and save you!” “..i know what i have to do. hey northwest, be mean to me!” “ok, ok, just… give me a minute. ….hey circus freak, you’ve got arms like a gorilla and a voice like a wrestler, so it’s no wonder that the only boys interested in you are a bunch of wolves!” “…..pacifica, that was really mean.” “YOU TOLD ME TO!!!”
-maybe have pacifica get on the mic again so all the wolves hear her insult
-“grenda I’m sorry you have the body of an amazonian goddess and a voice like ten angels singing one direction!!” “yeah, maybe if one direction were all chain smokers.”
-the girls use this plan to lure the wolfpack into the kitchen, where there’s a sprinkler system connected to the fire alarm. the plan is that once all of the wolves are present, mabel will signal for candy to pull the alarm. however, once mabel gives the signal, it’s revealed that candy has been captured. “i’m sorry, mabel…. their pecs were just so shiny!” “i’m sorry i dragged you into this, pacifica.” “yeah, i’m sorry you dragged me into this, too.” maybe have them cowering on top of the fridge. but just when it looks like all hope is lost, the sprinklers come on anyway. it’s revealed that the first gerard was the one who pulled it, sacrificing himself to save mabel’s life.
-“you will always be in my heart, mabel pines. and i hope…..that i will be in yours…..”
-“well, pacifica, maybe now that we’ve worked together as a team, we can come away from this knowing that our fighting was petty and pointless, having gained a mutual respect.” “are you SERIOUS? all this proves is that you’re a freak, and your friends are freaks, and even though I’m gonna make sure to stay as far away from your little circle of lost causes as possible, the next time we meet? you’re going DOWN, and I’m gonna make sure EVERYONE is watching.” “……welp! i didn’t gain anything from that! maybe next time.”
-“i’m sorry that all this happened, girls. if you don’t wanna hang out with me after this, i get it.” “are you kidding? that was incredible!” “i feel like my heart is on fire! but in a good way!”
-in the aftermath, the girls (sans pacifica) burn the book. as they watch the illustration of gerard smolder, mabel solemnly says “this ends once and for all.” “….my mom’s gonna want that book back.” “once. and. for all.”
IRRATIONAL TREASURE
-pacifica overhears what the twins are trying to do and tails them, then ends up getting captured along with them
-LET ME OUT OF HERE! I AM A NORTHWEST!
-i thought we just established that doesn’t count for anything anymore.
-pacifica yells at mabel for doing something as stupid as leaving a trail of candy wrappers, dipper interrupts to ask her why she always feels the need to shut people down like that. pacifica tells him that its her duty as a woman of status to let everyone know what their place is. “orrrrrr you just feel so threatened by the idea that you’re not as well-liked as you think you are that you need to make everyone else feel bad about themselves.” “WHAT was that?” “threatened?”
-mabel gets her nerve back and yells at pacifica that why would she ever want to be liked by a stuck-up shallow primadonna like her, and throws a hunk of peanut brittle at her, freeing trembly.
-after returning to town, the twins see pacifica being berated by her parents for disappearing and getting her clothes dirty. mabel feels sorry for her and goes over to explain that oh, it was actually my fault, i was trying to uncover dirt on the northwest family and pacifica stepped up to intervene, and we got into a fight. also we totally didnt find anything to shame the northwests so you can thank pacifica for that too. the northwests then threaten to sue the pines family for hurting their daughter, but paz holds them back, saying something about how it isnt worth it to waste time on poor people like mabel.
-this is the start of mabel and pacifica’s budding friendship, and pacifica’s redemption arc
SUMMERWEEN
-hey, little man!
-oh, hey wendy! ….and robbie.
-so….. chilling in the bushes without a costume on? what’s that about?
-nah, i’d say he’s got a pretty solid 'loser’ costume lined up already.
-i’m just hanging out with mabel and her friends, i guess. this big legendary monster thing says its gonna eat us unless we collect 500 pieces of candy but y'know. no worries.
-sick, dude. and you didn’t even have to go out and find this thing yourself? your sis must be like, a monster magnet.
-yeah, she…really is.
-well, i’d help you with the mission if i could, but i’ve got this whole 'aloof teenager’ thing to keep up, yknow? no trick-or-treating for these old bones. but I’ve got a few extra sweets in my purse if you need some more handouts! we can go find mabel, and-
-NO! i-i mean… no, don’t find her, its ok, i got it, give it to me.
-woah, chill out, you little freak! you’re not HIDING from her, are you? …is everything ok? and don’t say it is, because nobody sweats that much when everything’s ok. not even you.
-……i dunno, it’s like, i don’t mind having her around, but we’re always together and she wants us to do all these “twin” things now and I’m just not sure I’m ready for it yet.
-yeah, i getcha. its gotta be a lot to take in. hey, if you need somewhere to decompress after this whole candy deathmatch thing is over, tambry’s throwing a party at her house in a few. text me when you’re free?
-just try not to dork up the place if you show.
-robbie, if you don’t lay off I’m gonna punch you in the dick.
-i just….. twins are supposed to have this special bond, y'know? like a mind meld or something. and i just feel like i’ve missed so much. things could've….should’ve been different. and i came here because i wanted to make things the way they were supposed to be. i thought like, maybe if we were together we could pretend that its the way things always were and everything was ok. but i cant. its not.
-yeah, i… i’m sorry, mabel. everything just happened so fast, and i couldn’t handle it, and i avoided thinking about it, and….i ended up avoiding you, too. i’ve been kind of a crummy brother so far, huh?
-no, no, i get it…. i’m weird, and this is weird, and you’re one of those weird people who likes to be by yourself. and i understand if you don’t want to be siblings. but… can we at least be friends?
-i don’t see why we can’t be both.
TOURIST TRAPPED
-hey, mabel, i was wondering, uh…… how did our parents die?
-woah, what? they’re not dead! are they?? you’re freaking me out, dipper!
-'sup, hambone?
-oh, hey….. soos, right?
-you got it, lil’ dude! so, what’s eating you? besides the mosquitos anyway. nice, good one soos.
-soos, have you ever tried to do something that you thought would make everyone really happy, but instead it just blows up in your face and everything is awful and it’s all your fault?
-story of my life, dude. probably not on this scale though. just a minor everyday occurrence.
-they probably hate me, don’t they?
-what? no way! i just met you a few hours ago and i can already tell you’re like the least hateable dude I’ve ever met. you’re like if they found a way to combine a smiling puppy with an anime fairy princess.
-but i ruined everything!! that’s what they’ll call me in the history books. mabel, queen of ruining everything. everyone was fine until i got here.
-it’s not your fault, dude. mr. pines had to tell dipper at some point. and dude, if it makes you feel any better, i am PSYCHED to have you here. i was telling customers about it all day!
-thanks, soos, but…. i should probably just go home. maybe if I’m gone dipper and stan can just forget this ever happened and go back to normal.
-you kidding, dog? nothing’s ever normal around here. i know this is like, a huge bombshell, but dipper and stan love each other. they’ll work it out. …hey, my brain just came up with a totally neato idea! why don’t we pitch a tent and have a sleepover out here under the stars? we could swap stories, eat raw marshmallows, and if you still want to go home tomorrow morning you can.
-….only if you’ll try to throw the marshmallows into my mouth with your eyes closed.
-deal.
-hey, mom. yeah i got here ok! it’s great, the woods around here are so cool and mysterious! oh, and i met this really cute guy but he turned out to be a bunch of gnomes under a hoodie. i know!! wild, right!
-h-hey mabel….can i….talk to them?
-…oh, mom, dipper wants to talk to you. is that ok?
-….hi, mo- ..mrs pines. it’s dipper.
-“oh, you must be the friend mabel was talking about! she was so excited to meet you! i hope you two are having fun!”
-yeah, it's…. it’s good to have her here.
-“are you all right, dear? you’re sniffling.”
-yeah, i’ve just got a cold. it’s ok.
THE HAND THAT ROCKS THE MABEL
-mabel sees a commercial for the tent of telepathy on tv and gets excited, pulling dipper over to see the famous “psychic”. dipper is annoyed at best and just groans, expositing that he and gideon have been rivals since they were little. he says he’s been trying to catch gideon in the act of something, ANYTHING, for as long as he can remember, and now with the help of mabel’s journal he’s devised a new theory: that gideon might actually be a vampire! he’s always coated in lotion, has stark white hair, speaks like an old southern man, and it might also explain his psychic powers. but dipper isn’t allowed in the tent of telepathy anymore, and he hasn’t been able to get close to gideon in his personal life. mabel offers to go investigate in dipper’s place, but he warns her that it’s not worth it and gideon is a “creep”, offhandedly mentioning that mabel probably doesn’t have the investigative skills necessary to crack the case on her own. determined to prove herself, mabel goes anyway, in “disguise” as a journalist so she can ask gideon questions when the show is over. during the questioning gideon becomes enamored with her, and when mabel asks if he’s a vampire he flirts around the issue, suggesting that he is simply to win mabel over. it works, and she agrees to go on a date with him.
-mabel takes notes on gideon’s mannerisms in the journal while on dates
-over time, gideon begins to reveal his true colors, and mabel realizes that dating a supposed vampire doesn’t really make up for gideon’s behavior.
-actually i changed my mind about the vampire plot, probably dipper just tries to keep mabel away from gideon because of their checkered past together
BOYZ CRAZY
“….can i confess something?”
“yeah, of course.”
“I’ve never like….. LIKED anyone. I’ve dated plenty of guys, and even a couple girls, but i don’t think i felt what i was supposed to be feeling for any of them. i thought that eventually if i went out with enough people, i would start to like at least one of them, but…. i dunno. I’m starting to think that i’ll never fall in love. maybe i CANT fall in love.”
“well… that’s not the end of the world! love kinda. sucks. especially when someone doesn’t like you back.”
“ugh, that’s what I’ve been doing to all these people! for years! i suck. i keep trying to be like everyone else, but i just end up pushing people away. I’ve lost so many friends…”
“hey, it’s not your fault. robbie’s a turd, you know that.”
“yeah, i guess you’re right… i dunno, you ever feel like there’s something, like, fundamentally wrong with you? like something fucked up in the womb and now you can’t ever be a normal person?”
[dipper pulls up his shirt slightly, looking at his binder]
“yeah. i do”
DREAMSCAPERERS
bill: I WAS WONDERING WHEN I’D RUN INTO YOU! QUESTION MARK, SHOOTING STAR…. AND DIPPER OF COURSE!
mabel: whoa, hey, how come soos and i get special names, but not dipper? that’s not fair!
dipper: uh, mabel, that’s not really-
bill: THAT IS HIS SPECIAL NAME, KID! ALWAYS HAS BEEN. HE JUST ADOPTED IT A LITTLE EARLY IS ALL.
dipper: wait, what?. you…you were the one in my dreams? all this time, it was YOU?
-new scene-
dipper: it’s just… the name was a big part of my like, identity, yknow? i thought it was so cool and special and for the first time in my life i was starting to feel NOT like a freak. i thought i was being cool but i was just doing exactly what bill wanted! [pulls his jacket over his head] aaaargh, what have i been doing all this time?!
mabel: di- …..bro, listen to me. your whole like, supreme tough guy monster hunter thing? it’s PRETTY silly. but that’s what i like about it! it’s all you, and you own it! and nobody chose to make you like that but you! and you didnt choose the name dipper because bill told you to, right? that was still all you. so, i don’t know. even if the guy who made it up turned out to be kiiiiiiind of a major jerk i dont think that means all of that is ruined forever. and if you stop going by dipper i’m going to have to start going by shooting star as revenge. star for short!
dipper: ….i think i like you as mabel better.
mabel: aww no, i was already getting used to it! star sounds like the name of a princess, doesnt it? or a galactic warrior!
-BUT DON’T YOU WORRY YOUR GEL-COVERED LITTLE HEAD, KID! I WON’T BE BOTHERING YOU LIKE THAT AGAIN. YOU’VE PROVEN YOURSELF TO BE EXTREMELY DISAPPOINTING AND USELESS. CONGRATS.
SCARY-OKE
-in this case obviously dipper wouldn’t want the agents around, since stan has taught him better than that.
-dipper decides that he’s finally ready to talk to his birth parents over the phone, but when he does they insist that they never had twins and mabel has always been an only child, and he realizes they don’t know who he is. everything he knows is once again called into question.
-mabel tries to get the agents’ help in figuring out the mystery behind dipper’s birth and proving that the two of them are siblings
-maybe dipper raises the dead as a way to threaten stan? like, oh you’re so afraid of the supernatural, what if i do this
-or mabel tries to lure the agents back to the shack by creating a supernatural disaster, like oh, say, zombies
-stan finally admits, with zombies breaking down the door, that he got mixed up with the supernatural and made some very bad decisions, although he isn’t specific about what happened. he relinquishes that he kept the truth from dipper all these years not for his sake, but because he couldn’t bear to admit that he was responsible for separating dipper from the family he should’ve grown up with.
THE GOLF WAR
-mabel and pacifica run into each other at the mini golf course, and after watching mabel sink the winning shot pacifica realizes she has feelings for her. furious with herself for developing a crush on somebody like mabel, pacifica challenges her to a rematch and vows to destroy her.
-dipper and stan are worried about pacifica’s behavior, but mabel assures them that she probably just wants a little one-on-one game and had to disguise it as a fight to the death since her parents were with her.
-pacifica gets to the golf course early to get some extra practice in, discovers the lilliputtians, and decides to use them to win against mabel, convinced that if she proves to herself that she’s better then her crush will go away.
-mabel becomes concerned with pacifica’s attitude and worried that she’s gone back to her old ways, bribing somebody to help her cheat. eventually she’s captured and tied up, and pacifica has to save her.
-in the aftermath, pacifica can’t stomach apologizing, so mabel does it for her. “hold on, dip. i think i know what’s going on here.” “what? no. you definitely don’t. whatever you’re about to say about me is completely and totally wrong.” “so i just want to let you know, pacifica…. it’s ok. i understand.” “understand what there’s nothing to understand” “yes there is! and i’ve felt that way before, too. even about you sometimes.” “wh…..huh? you have?” “yeah! all that pressure to compete really gets to you sometimes. but just because i beat you at something it doesn’t mean that you’re any less cool than you were before., ok? so i don’t want you to feel like you have to prove that!” “oh. yeah. yeah, that. yeah.” [awkward pause] “soooo…. you don’t hate me?” “of course not!” “ok good. that’s like, good to know. i don’t hate you either.”
-theyre playing truth or dare and mabel dares dipper to hold candy’s hand for the rest of the night
-mabifica bullshit: 'let me see those beautiful eyes’, holding hands post-confession in nmm, arguing about whether or not to run off into the woods together at night
THE LOVE GOD
-during a conversation with wendy, dipper casually mentions that he’d like a girlfriend. mabel overhears and decides to try and pair him up with someone. she enlists the help of candy and grenda for this secret mission, but notices that candy seems uncomfortable with it. eventually she admits that she’s had a crush on dipper for a while, and mabel is ecstatic. she conspires to set them up on a date at the woodstick festival. candy makes mabel promise not to tell dipper, but of course she can’t keep her mouth shut and blurts it out while the two are having breakfast at the diner. mabel expects dipper to leap at the chance, but instead he just feels awkward. he tells mabel that although he likes candy and thinks she’s great, he’s never thought of her like that. mabel urges him to give her a chance, but dipper argues that it will end badly. he spots candy nearby, freaks out, and runs for cover. it’s at this point that mabel meets the love god.
NORTHWEST MANSION MYSTERY
-“….and grenda can take a hit pretty well so she’d be the best choice for a distraction while i spray 'em with the anointed water from behind, but we might need pacifica to-”
“actually, dip, i was gonna ask if i could handle this one on my own.”
“what? why? we don’t know how powerful this ghost is!”
“because i, the wonderful mabel pines, am going to confess my love for pacifica tonight!”
“you only realized you liked her two days ago!”
“exactly! no time to waste when romance is afoot!”
“you don’t even know if pacifica LIKES girls!”
“well i don’t know if she likes BOYS either. she always seemed kinda indifferent to-
"even if she does, what if she doesn’t like you back? and you know what her parents are like, they probably wouldn’t want her dating another girl anyway…”
“why do you always have to shoot me down like this”
“…..i’m sorry, mabel… i just don’t want you to get hurt again.”
-“we did it!” “haha, yes!!”
-(internally) “this is the perfect moment, mabel, just go for it!”
-“umm, pacifica? now that we just beat this big scary ghostman together, there’s something i wanted to-”
-“YOU’LL PAY FOR THIS, FOOLISH CHILD”
-“….on second thought, I’m gonna go exorcise screamsville here first.”
-“that’s probably a good idea”
-{“WITCH! SERVANT OF EVIL!”}
-“i’m sorry. i didn’t want you to know this about me.”
-“ok, so, your family’s gotten mixed up in some bad stuff, that doesn’t mean-”
-“no, it does. you’ve always been so nice to me, and i never did anything to deserve it… hanging out with you, and dipper, and everyone, hanging around the shack….i started to realize that this isn’t normal. my parents aren't……normal. and now I’m just so scared that no matter what i do, i’ll end up just like them.”
-“….pacifica. i know you. your outsides may be crusted over with gold coins and expensive body lotion and hairspray, but your insides are made of bubbles and kitten kisses and rainbow dolphins high-fiving each other. your parents are a couple of stinky poo-heads inside and out and you’re not anything like them.”
[pacifica, crying, kisses her]
-“oh no. this was a mistake. I’m leaving.”
-“pacifICA WAIT”
-“what would you say if i said i was in love with you?”
-“i’d say you only wanted me for my money”
-“oh pacifica, your heart is gold enough to last me a lifetime!”
-“shhhhhpsshh stop!!”
-[mabel kisses her on the cheek]
-“no but really stop i don’t want my parents to see”
-“ohhh yeah sorry”
THE LAST MABELCORN
-things start out much like they do in canon, but when mabel meets the unicorn and it tells her that she’s not pure of heart she jumps to the conclusion that bill has “tainted” her in some way by taking over her body. the abuse metaphors here are obvious. she sadly returns home and begs ford to help her in some way, and he takes her down to his study. meanwhile, dipper sets back out with the girls in mabel’s place.
-“…..but it wasn’t me….” “what?” “i…..i have to go.” “mabel, wait!”
have it so like, she’s not necessarily visibly distraught when she talks to ford, or even to her friends, but more determined to “fix” herself, hiding the worry that she’s a bad person beneath her insistence that it must be bill’s fault.
“GRUNKLE FORD! bill gunked up my soul and i need you to fix it so i can be pure of heart again!” “…mabel…” “please please please PLEEEAASE!”
-“no offense, but you break the law daily, you two have kind of a…. mutual violent streak, and you……” “don’t say anything.” “and if being involved with bill really did disqualify mabel, then I’ve been doomed for years.” “you’re also not a 'maiden.’” “good point.”
-“man, this is bullshit.” “i know. how are we gonna find someone more pure than mabel?” “no, i mean. the game’s rigged. nobody’s completely 'pure of heart’ or whatever, and how do you even measure that? that glitter-snorting poser doesn’t ever have to give up the goods because she’s asking for something that doesn’t exist.” “…so how do we get the hair?” “well, i say if princess unattainabelle back there doesn’t wanna play fair, we shouldn’t have to either. alright, kids, who’s ready to add a few more bad deeds to the naughty list?” “YEAH!”
-meanwhile, mabel’s mind begins to be encoded. “i can’t undo what’s already been done, mabel. but i can make it a lot harder for bill to hurt you again.”
-mabel’s thoughts: “do you a favor” “have craz and xyler ever kissed?” “adopt every kitten in the world” “PACIFICA PACIFICA PACIFICA”
-mabel ends up putting the helmet on ford because she starts to have intrusive thoughts worrying that he could be possessed by bill, and she decides that proving herself wrong would put them to rest. “ugh, shut UP, brain! this is why we don’t talk anymore.”
-when mabel reads his thoughts, she freaks out and, unlike dipper, actually succeeds in hitting ford with the memory gun. he’s knocked to the ground and she approaches him cautiously as he rises back to his feet. when he explains that he’s not bill and the gun didn’t work anyway, mabel starts crying and hugs him. “its ok, mabel. you did the right thing. when dealing with an enemy like bill, you can’t fully trust anyone, not even the people closest to you. …maybe if i’d known that when i was younger, we wouldn’t be in this mess now.”
-“….i’m a bad person.” “oh come on, you don’t still believe that unicorn, do you? i thought dipper told you she was full of it.” “no, i… did something really bad today. i thought bill did something to gunk up my heart but it was really just me all along.” “wow, what did you do?” “nn. you’d hate me if i told you.” “mabel, you could kill a dog in front of me and i wouldn’t hate you. and if you don’t tell me i’ll just assume the worst.” “i AM the worst.” “ohhhh my god. …..ok, let’s say that bill did break your soul for all eternity or whatever. so what? you’re still my girlfriend. and in case you haven’t noticed, i’m pretty messed up too.”
ROADSIDE ATTRACTION
-“aww, come on! think about it…. just us girls, alone under the stars…” “eww, fine! i’ll come if you stop being gross”
-“i can’t believe my own sister got a girlfriend before me!”
-“romance ain’t a contest, kid.”
-“…yeah, you’re probably r-”
-“just kidding its definitely a contest. one you’re losing.”
-“he was… flirting with me! i think he actually likes me back!”
-“AAAAAAAAA!!” “get it, girl!” “candy wins!” “i wouldn’t get your hopes up, chiu. he’s probably just being a tool.”
-“pacifica, how could you?” “why must you deny true love?” “hey, dipper’s my friend and i think he’s great, but he sucks. I’m just being realistic.”
-“oh, no. i think i just agreed to take candy out on a date.”
-“….aaaaand do you LIKE her?”
-“well, yeah…………….as a fr-”
-“UGGGGGHHHHHH I KNEW IT. listen, 'dopper’, you got yourself into this mess, and its not up to me to help get you out. you deserve it for toying with a woman’s feelings, anyway.”
“candy…. saved my life. even after i broke her heart. she’s so cool…………………………………oh, SHIT.”
-“it’s ok, dipper. if dating pacifica has taught me anything, its that the way to a woman’s heart is through emotional angst and near-death experiences. and we get those every day!”
-“you deserve this and i have no sympathy for you.”
DIPPER AND MABEL VS THE FUTURE
same basic setup, with mabel hitting up all her friends for party plans, but the focus is on having to return home without all the friends she’s made rather than anxiety about growing up (although that’s still a factor). in addition to discovering candy and grenda won’t be around, she also finds that pacifica’s parents are becoming suspicious of her frequent outings so she’s trying to lay low for a little while, so she won’t be able to hang out for the last week of summer.
ford invites dip along for the alien hunt, and doesn’t exactly offer dipper the chance to be his apprentice, but is impressed with his adventuring skills and the fact that dipper has been training in the art of mystery solving for years. au dipper is quite a bit braver than canon dipper after all, and quicker to spring into action right after ford. theres still a bit of hesitation involved, and when ford praises him for his courage, he laughs and remarks that mabel would’ve jumped right away without any thought. ford then confides in dipper that although mabel uses her heart before her head, he can still see how scared she is inside and thinks it would be best for mabel to return home and cease connection with gravity falls, because he’s seen first-hand how much bill has hurt her already and he doesn’t want it to get any worse. he also tells dipper that he can tell mabel’s heart isn’t in any kind of study or quest for knowledge like he is, she’s just a kid having fun, and he can tell that its mostly because she wants to impress dipper and it might be better for her to focus her energy on her own interests, which can’t happen if she stays in gravity falls. dipper reluctantly agrees, saying that he’s always sort of worried about the same thing. of course, this is the part that mabel hears over the walkie-talkie.
for all that mabel and ford’s relationship is better, he still sees her as a child while he sees dipper as more of an equal. he warns dipper that letting mabel become dependent on him, or he on her, is a bad idea, because one day they’re going to have to go their separate ways, and mabel might not be able to handle it (implying that she’ll do something drastic to keep him around, like stan did to him).
theres a scene midway through the episode of pacifica sulking on her bed, hugging a pillow to her face. her mother’s voice calls her for dinner from downstairs, and she groans and gets up. looking in the mirror, she realizes her mascara has run and she scoffs and rubs at her eyes. when she opens them up again, the mirror is full of eyes. “something wrong, blondie?” it cuts off there
after mabel runs away into the woods at the end of the episode, pacifica emerges from the bushes in her full incognito gear, saying she came to warn her about bill. that bill tried to make a deal with her but she refused everything he offered, and that he’s getting desperate and is going to try again with someone else, probably before the summer ends. she tells mabel that if neither of their families want them, they’ll run away, out of gravity falls, together. when mabel realizes she has the rift, she groans, annoyed that she has to go back home and return it. but pacifica insists that this actually makes the plan better, that if they leave gravity falls with the rift it can be kept safer… and that, maybe it would be better if pacifica held onto it, since bill is targeting mabel. mabel agrees and hands it over…. at which point pacifica takes a moment to admire it, and then smashes it to the ground. she laughs, takes off her sunglasses, and is revealed to have been possessed by bill. then the world ends.
WEIRDMAGEDDON 1
-after ford is captured, dipper runs into grenda, as in literally runs into her, while she’s attempting to chase a monster in process of carrying off candy. the two travel together for the next three days, finally deciding to explore the mall in search of mabel and the others. on the way there, though, the two are ambushed by bill’s lackeys. before the fight can begin, grenda tosses dipper out of harm’s way and shouts for him to go on without her while she holds off the monsters. dipper reluctantly escapes, leaving grenda to an ambiguous fate.
-during that time, candy finds pacifica huddled in a pile of rubble, and urges her to come help find the others, but she’s reluctant. “look, mabel’s not here anymore, alright?! she’s gone. bill got her. so you can stop pretending to like me.” “candy does not pretend. not when it comes to friendship.” “….if you just left me here, nobody would have to know.” “on your feet, northwest.”
“augh, my poor hair… it’s got like, twigs and shit in it.” “do you want me to cut it off?” “what? no. why would i do that.” “it’s a symbol! in stories, girls cut off their long hair when they are going on journeys and breaking free, leaving the past behind… it is cool and majestic and– pacifica, YOU should cut off MY hair!” “wait, seriously? …ok, whatever, fine, do your weird impulsive nerd thing. you got any like, scissors?” “let me see….. six, seven, eight pairs! i also have a knife.” “candy, what the fuck.”
-dipper finds wendy, pacifica, and candy all hiding together in the mall. dipper is surprised and relieved to find that candy is safe and she talks about how she bit the monster’s hand to get it to free her, proudly revealing that one of her teeth has turned completely red as a result. dipper admits what happened to grenda, and while pacifica and wendy look worried, candy remains adamant that she’s strong and will be all right. hesitantly, dipper asks if any of them have seen mabel. the room goes quiet, and pacifica confesses what happened, that bill came to her and threatened to possess and torture mabel again if she didn’t let him use her body. she thought that if she agreed, she’d become a ghost like mabel did and be able to use a puppet as a vessel in time to warn somebody. instead she simply blacked out, and when she came to she was just in time to see mabel being sealed in a bubble and taken away.
-at some point pacifica confesses to dipper that bill never threatened to hurt mabel. she made the deal willingly because he promised her that mabel would be able to stay in gravity falls if she let him borrow her body, and she was just so scared of losing her, and everyone.
-candy’s arm is broken in the car chase and ensuing wreck against gideon’s crew. in the aftermath, pacifica uses the remains of her jacket to make a sling.
ESCAPE FROM REALITY
mabeland is nearly the same as in canon, though maybe with some minor alterations to reflect the events of the summer. dippy fresh is replaced by a series of “dream dippers”, versions of dipper that mabel had imagined he might be like before actually meeting him. most are unrealistically cool, but one in particular is just someone who would be the ideal brother, always looking out for her and wanting to be with her. in the end of course, mabel has to look at all of this and decide that real dipper is the one she wants. (theres also a fake pacifica who shares all of mabel’s interests and is hopelessly in love with her, always flirting and offering romantic gestures, but without any of the sass and personality that make her who she is. pacifica ends up snapping her neck.)
mabel introduces the dream dippers one by one like they’re contestants on a game show, but one spot is left empty. dipper asks who it’s for, to which mabel nervously replies that it’s more convenient to have something extra just in case. later on, in the wilderness of mabeland, dipper overhears mabel talking to someone. “i don’t understand. everyone can finally be happy here. wendy can break all the rules she wants and never get in trouble, candy can be herself without people making fun of her, pacifica can get away from her parents, and dipper…. well maybe i can understand why HE wants to leave, since he apparently doesn’t want to deal with me….” suddenly, dipper hears his own voice reassuring her that everything will be alright, and he’ll stay by her side forever, that the summer never has to end. she says “do you really mean that?” to which he replies “of course. you know i’m the best brother ever.” the voice is revealed to be perfect, ideal brother dipper.
crushed by this, dipper retreats to the pond, where instead of being approached by wendy he’s approached by candy. she sits down and asks him what’s wrong, and he tells her how awful he feels that he couldn’t have done better for mabel. she assures him that he’s a wonderful person, and mabel’s being silly for not wanting someone like him as a brother. she then tells him that she was being silly for being mad at him, too, that she’s realized he was right all along, and she should’ve forgiven him earlier. “really? …'cause i was totally with you on the whole 'i was a jerk’ thing.” then candy ups the ante, going on to talk about how oh, he’s so much smarter and braver than her, and she was just upset because she thought she stood a chance with him, but she’s such a loser, she could never- dipper stops her there, worried. he continues to insist that it was his fault, he WAS being an asshole, and he should’ve apologized to her a long time ago, but he was nervous “because…. i DO like you, candy. like, like-like you.” he tells her to stop berating herself, that he likes her because she doesn’t let anybody change how weird she is and that she’s not acting like…. herself. it’s at that moment that he realizes what’s going on. as “candy” begins dissolving into bugs, a fist collides with her head and she explodes. its revealed to be grenda, who managed to find her way in because “the door was unlocked.”
when it comes to the trial, mabel’s memories are similarly flipped through, but instead of having a twin to be there in her time of need, she had nobody. she’s never had anybody like that until she met dipper.
TAKE BACK THE FALLS
-candy and grenda’s symbol is a disco ball. “…and this one could mean a person who can see the fun in any situation! or just a party animal.” “hey, that’s me!” “that’s me too!” “it’s both of us!! SYMBOL SISTERS!!!” [grenda lifts candy up onto her shoulders and they each take a hand, candy on her right side since her left arm is broken and grenda on the left]
-“we’re proud of you, daughter. saving the world will be perfect for salvaging our reputation! i still think those pines kids are a bit of a bad influence on you, though.”
-“oh YEAH? how’s THIS for a bad influence?!” [she pulls mabel into a passionate kiss] “news flash, dad! your perfect daughter’s a big fat gross lesbian! and when i grow up I’m gonna marry this riffraff right here, and change my name to pines too!! so DEAL WITH IT!!!”
stan still loses his memory as he did in canon, but dipper is the most visibly distraught and won’t stop begging him to remember. he tells him how even though they fought a lot over that summer, he loves him so much and he’d never ask for a better grunkle. he desperately tries to jog his memory with baby pictures, but they need to trigger more immediate memories first.
the solution for mabel to stay in gravity falls would be to fabricate a lie that dipper is ford’s grandson, ford being the twin that faked his own death to escape a life on the run, but they’ve just come back to reconnect with the family (since dipper lost his parents apparently), and mabel didn’t want to tell her parents at first because she was afraid they wouldn’t want her staying with an estranged family member/ex-con. but she’s made so many great friends and she loves this town and wants to stay with her “cousin”.
while the northwests go house hunting, mabel invites pacifica to stay at the shack until they can find a new home.
rather than leaving for a new adventure, ford and stan decide to stay at the shack and rest for a while, just settle into their new family dynamic. soos, melody, and abuelita all still move in, and so the house is renovated to make room for the huge family.
with the journals destroyed, the mystery squad now has to start from square one…. but dipper tells mabel that she doesn’t have to do anything to impress him anymore. that he’s ready to try just being a kid again.
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lildevyl · 4 years
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Hearts and Heroes
Summary:  Fans and YouTubers from all around the world come together to help fight against a great evil that invades everyone’s dreams, known as the Terrorlings.  Join Brandy and her team as they team up to help fight the Leader of the Terrorlings and help save their friend and mentor, Markiplier.
This is based on the fan-made game in the Markiplier Community known as Hearts and Heroes.
TW:  Mild Gore, Violence, Fran Bow Game, Hospital, Asylum, Nightmares, Anxiety, Mention of depression
Guest Staring:  @weirdmixofweirdness as Nora Weird
                              Chapter 1: Dream Warrior
(Brandy’s House)
Brandy sat at her computer wiping tears from her face from laughing so hard, as the video of Markiplier Makes Pancakes wrapped up.  She was so glad the Markiplier Makes video ended up in her Recommended.  After a busy weekend like this, it was nice to sit back and just relax a bit.  That and Brandy really needed the laugh.  Her lacrosse practice didn’t go so well, but she was starting to feel a bit better now.  After getting ready for the night and turning off her computer.  Brandy headed off to bed ready for some goodnight sleep.  Not knowing the adventure that awaits her.
(The Manson):
When Brandy woke up, she found herself lying on a - couch?  That didn’t make any sense.  Why would she be on a couch?  Looking around, Brandy realized that she wasn’t’ in her house anymore.  She was in someone else’s home, but where?  Brandy got up and decided to explore, maybe she can find someone and get to the bottom of this.
The more Brandy explored the house the more it seemed familiar to her somehow.  She just couldn’t put her finger on it, but Brandy knew this place looked familiar to her.  It wasn’t until she came across a hallway full of portraits but the faces looked like a giant ex was painted on them.
A portrait of a Chef.  “I thought I told you to stay outta my Kitchen!” A portrait of a Butler.  “The Master will be so displeased!” A portrait of a Woman in a Fortune-teller Room.  “I won’t force this on you.  You have a choice.” A portrait of a Mayor.  “Life is our’s to choose.” A portrait of a Colonel.  “Life needs a bit of madness.” And a portrait of an Actor.  “Life is to live it to the fullest.”
*Same snake, different skin.*
Brandy entered the Kitchen and didn’t find anyone, but wait?  Is that?  Brandy goes over to the Island where a tiny box is sitting and smiling at her.  “Huh?  No way!  Tiny Box Tim!”
“Hiya!”  Tiny Box Time greeted.
Then there was a flash of light and someone else was standing in front of Brandy but was behind Tiny Box Tim.  “Well, hey there, Tiny Box Tim.  How’s my little biscuit doing?  Thanks for notifying me that she’s here!”
“Huh?  Whoa!  You’re Markiplier!”
“Hi.  Listen, I know you have a lot of questions and I’ll try to explain everything as best as I can.  But right now, we need to get someplace safe.”
“Someplace safe?  I don’t understand.  Aren’t I just dreaming?”
“You are.  I am too.  It’s a bit complicated and I promise that I’ll explain everything, as best as I can.”  Mark held out his hand, palm up, gesturing for Brandy to take the first step.
“Um, okay.”
(Markiplier Hub)
Brandy stepped forward next to Mark and the next thing that Brandy knew.  She, Mark and Tiny Box Tim was all being teleported somewhere.  “Whoa.  Okay, feeling a little dizzy.  Okay, now can I know where I am?”
“Yeah, it takes a little getting used too.  And to answer your question, this is basically, home base for people like us.  You, me, and many others were chosen to fight against the Terrorlings.”  Mark started to explain.
“The what?”  Brandy asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Hear me out on this, alright?  I’ll try to explain as best as I can.  Terrorlings are basically dream-like demons that feed off negative emotions.  Anger, jealousy, grief, sadness, anxiety, uncertainty, and fear.  They can only affect people’s dreams as of right now, but the damage they can cause is very real.  And if they grow strong enough, I'm afraid their darkness will begin to seep into the awaking world.”
“That doesn’t sound good!”  Brandy said getting a little on edge.  She can only imagine what that might be like.
“Yeah, it’s definitely not good.  But that’s why we’re here to help.  This is the Hub or as some people like to call it the Markihub.”
Brandy gave one of her, “Yeah, right” looks at that.  “So, what do we do here?”
“Well, people here train for battling the Terrorlings.  They can also gather supplies and meet up with their teammates before missions.  Then, when the third shift bell rings, a portal will open to take you to the person that needs to be saved.  Speaking of, there’s the first bell!  You’ve still got a lot to do, but I’ll help you get up to speed.  Follow me to the training room.”
Brandy followed Mark to the Training Room, and her mouth fell open.  The Training Room looked more like a dojo!  Training Dummies were set up, different training weapons, and protections when using real weapons during training.  And so many other people were also training as well.  Brandy partnered up with Mark and he showed Brandy the ropes that will be her in her first mission.  After some time, Mark said that Brandy wasn’t too bad for the first in training and showed her the Army.  Mark stayed outside, claiming that the guy in there made him a bit uneasy.
“Good evening ladies and gentlemen, reader and all other configurations of being, my name is Wilford Warfstache and this is my weapon shop!  I’m in charge of very sharp objects.  Ready to choose your class?  Wilford Warfstache takes no crap from anybody!”  Wilford told Brandy.
“My class?”  Brandy asked, confused.
Wilford then went on to explain the different classes that people here in the dream world can take.  The different weapons they will have and the different training opportunities as well.  But Brandy had to choose carefully.  It was first to come first serve and all sales final after that!  Brandy decided on Warrior since that’s what she would normally choose if this was an RPG Game.
After exploring the Markihub a bit more, trying to figure out where everything is, and the layout of the place.  Brandy decided to find Mark.  She’s still very confused about a lot of things, and Mark did promise that he would explain everything.  Here’s hoping.
“You ready?”  Mark asked.
“I think so,” Brandy said.
“Great.  Now I’ll try to explain things more, especially since I promised to explain everything as best as I can.  Every person has their own Terrorlings.  In the dreams, they can manifest themselves into entities that are familiar to the victim. They invade the person’s head, causing the victim’s dreams to become nightmares, attacking them, and slowly eating away at their sanity.  Our job is to go into their dreams and save them before the Terrorlings do too much damage.” Mark explains.
Bong.
“There isn’t much time left before the portal opens.  And there’s a couple of things you need to do before heading out.  Sometimes, I like to do a quick send-off before the start of a shift.  It can get tough out there, so a few words of encouragement are always good.  What you want to do and I’ll help show you, is to equip before you head on out.  That way you’re fully prepared and have a better chance at fighting the Terrorlings.”
Brandy quickly equipped her armor and Mark showed her how to secure her sword when not in use.  “Okay, I think I’m ready to go, but I still don’t know exactly what I’m going to be doing out there.  I mean, I’ve hit people with a lacrosse stick before, but I never really been in a fight before.”  Brandy confessed.  She was really nervous about botching her first mission and completely messing it up.
“Don’t worry, new recruits face easier enemies on their first missions.  Even though everyone’s dreams are different, we try to make sure no one is going in facing enemies that they can’t handle.  Tonight you’re going to help a college student who’s been going through a tough time.  Their adopted father has been put in jail and their classmates have been really laying it on them.  They're starting to feel like a burden and their anxiety has been going through the roof, even having a few depression episodes.  Here, things like anxiety can take form as Terrorlings.  They start out small, but they can pile up over time and can cause some major harm.  Along, with the depression episodes.  The Terrorlings can probably do a lot of damage if we don’t try to help them out.”
“So, I go into someone’s dream and fight these  .   .   .  Terrorlings?”  Brandy asked.  Now, she was getting really nervous about this.
“Yep, and once they’ve been rescued, the exit portal will appear to take you back to the hub.”
“And  .   .   .   What if I  .   .   .   fail?”  That was one of Brandy’s biggest fears. Failing.  Not just failing a test or something, but actually failing someone.  Failing at helping someone.  Failing at something in life.  Brandy prides herself at being a really good student and yes, she has a lot of sass and tries her best to be a good friend.  But failing, at being a good friend, a good daughter.  It always made Brandy nervous that she might not be good enough.
“You’ll do great.  I know you can do it.  You were chosen for a reason.”
“If you say so,” Brady says, feeling a little confident now.  “Then, is it about time to start?”
“Yeah!  Let’s get going!”
As the third bell was about to toll, everyone gathered at the entrance where the portal will appear.  And as usual, everyone started talking among themselves, while Mark tried to get everyone’s attention.  A lot of people just did this knowing that, it would annoy Mark, it was kinda a thing that everyone did every now and then.
“Okay, now that I have your attention!”  Mark starts off awkwardly.  “We all know why we’re here.  There are dark things out there threatening the well-being of good people.  But we’re here to stop them.  Each and every one of us has something in your heart that can shine through that darkness and let you reach out to others.  Some of you were saved, others were chosen.  Chosen by what? 
Well to be honest  .   .   .  I have no freaking idea.  I’ve been doing this for a few years now and I still haven’t been able to figure it out.  But that doesn’t mean I’m gonna stop fighting.  Every night the darkness attacks, but our numbers continue to grow with every person saved.  Helping people is what I’m all about.  So, I’m taking this chance to do just that.  I want you all to know that even though things will get rough out there, I believe in you and I know you can do it!  And if it gets too much for you, just know that we’re all here for you and you can always ask for help.”
Bong.
“One more thing for the new people.  You, see that heart everyone has on their sleeves?  It’s the mark of a hero.  Not everyone you save will have one, but if they do, it means they’ll be joining our ranks in the fight against the Terrorlings. Alright, everyone!  Good Luck out there!”
The portal opened and everyone went through.  Talking to themselves or giving each other a last-minute pep talk.  Mark came to where Brandy was standing. “Let’s go!”
“Hang on second,” Brandy said.  “You said that each person had to be saved from the Terrorlings, right?”  Mark gave her a nod.  “Then what about me?  I wasn’t being attacked when you came and got me.  I was literally in a   .   .   . House?  Mansion?”
“Well like I said, sometimes people get chosen.  That’s what happened to me too.  I don’t know how this works, but it’s just one of those things where you get the chance to do some good and you’ve just gotta take it.”
“I guess that makes sense.  It’s kinda like donating to a charity or tutoring someone right?”
“Well, sorta.  If that helps you understand a bit better.”
“Hey, man.  I got enough sass on my own.  I don’t need any more from you.” Brandy said, crossing her arms.  “Anyway, I guess we should get going.  Here goes nothing!”
“You’ve got this!”
(Oswald Asylum)
“Whoa!  So, we’re in someone else’s dream right?”  Brandy asked looking around.  Oh, damn.  Where the hell are they?  Is this some kind of hospital?  Great, she hated hospitals!
“Yep!  We should hurry and try to find them before the Terrorlings do.”
“Are you going to stick with me through my whole shift?”
“Ah, sick of me already?  I’ll stay with you for as long as I can, but I have to eventually get back to my own objectives.”  Mark then looked around and suddenly his expression changed upon recognizing their surroundings.  “Oh, great I know where we are.”
“Wait, you do?  Where are we then?”
“This will certainly be an interesting first mission for ya.”  Both Mark and Brandy suddenly heard someone scream and came, barreling down the hall.  With what looked to be zombie-like skeletons chasing them.  “Looks like they need our help.  Let’s go!”
The person ran right by them and locked themselves in a room.  The Terrorlings start to taunt and scratch at the door.  Laughing and calling out to the person that was trapped in this nightmare.
“You’re Dad’s a criminal!” “He could have killed so many people just using his talent!” “He’s Dark’s puppet!  And you’ll be next!  You’ll be serving him, and no one will take you seriously.” “Not even the writer of this fanfic!”
=========
“Huh?!  How did -  Wait, are these guys breaking the fourth wall here?”  The writer of this fanfic says to absolutely no one.  “Okay, that must have been a typo!  Come on, I’m not even writing Wilford, the Host, the Author, or Darkiplier in this story yet and you guys are breaking character and the fourth wall already?!”
The writer of this story goes back to what she was writing and hopes to whatever Creator Power that is out there, that there won’t be any more breaking character or the fourth wall.
I guess she doesn’t know us, characters from the Markiplier Community, too well, do she?
“I’m going to pretend that I don’t see that and will continue to write this story the way I intended on writing it”
Okay. 👼
“Thank You!  Now, where was I?  Oh yes.  The person runs into a room locking the door behind them.”
========
(Oswald Asylum)
The person ran right by them and quickly locked themselves in a room.  The Terrorlings start to taunt and scratch at the door.  Laughing and calling out to the person that was trapped in this nightmare.
“Hey, jerks!  Over here!”
The Terrorlings turned around and their smiles grew to an ear to ear grin.  They came over to where Brandy and Mark were standing and were ready to fight. Brandy quickly grabs her sword and swings it around.  It was a bit heavy but it fit her perfectly as far as her body type.  Mark brought his staff and was ready to kick some ass.  The Terrorlings went after Brandy and Mark and the fight was on!  It was three against two.  Two of the Terrorlings, Brandy guests were the stronger ones, went after Mark and the Terrorling that Brandy got either wasn’t as skilled, as strong as the others or this Terrorling thought that Brandy would be slim pickings.
Brandy would be the first to admit to that she was by far any kind of fighter, but that didn’t mean that she wasn’t going down without a fight.  As the fight went on, it was clear that Brandy was a newbie, but holding her own.  The Terrorling did manage to get some good shots on Brandy but Brandy was able to block a lot of the Terrorling’s attacks and was able to get some shots in as well.  Brandy briefly saw Mark successfully battling two Terrorlings at once, and hoped that she would be able to get to that level.
Right now, that got someone they need to save.  Brandy blocked the Terrorling’s attacks and was able to get one final blow.  What shocked Brandy the most was, one point the Terrorling was standing right there, then the next moment, Brandy was staring at a pile of ash.  Brandy quickly went to check on Mark only to see that he as well had two piles of ash.
“The Terrorlings become ashes when defeated.  Then they regenerate and go after other people here in the dream world,” Mar explained upon seeing Brandy’s shocked and confused look.
“I guess that makes sense.  We should get to the person we’re trying to save.”  Brandy headed to the room where they saw the person ran into.
Mark tried the door.  “Locked.  Hello?  Anyone in there?  You can come out now! We’re here to help you.”  Mark tried calling out to them and even lightly, knocked on the door.  No one answered.
“I think I can help with this,” Brandy said.  She then pulls out a few bobby pins from her hair and quickly put them together.  Then she goes over to the locked door and tries to pick the lock.  It takes Brandy a few tries and luckily it’s an old fashion lock.  “Walla!  The door is now open!”  Brandy opened the door, letting Mark go first, with a small bow.  Mark just smiled and shook his head fondly.
When Mark and Brandy entered the room, both of them found the room to be completely empty besides the bare essentials.  A bed, a window with the currents on the floor, and a dresser, that was it.  The person who ran in here was gone.  They must have ran, off somewhere, but where is the question?
Beep, beep, beep.
“Oh, sorry.  I have to go now.  But as I was about to say earlier I know which this is,” Mark explained after looking at his watch.  “This is Fran Bow.  I think once you find the person we’re looking for, and head to the end of the maze you should be good.  Just be careful, and whatever you do, don’t take the red pills!”
“Will do Mark!”  Brandy assured.
After Mark disappeared through the portal, Brandy decided to look around.  What better way to figure out who she needs to find then look around the room she’s in.  Plus, Brandy didn’t remember watching the playthrough of Fran Bow so this is completely new to her.  Looking around the room (didn’t take that long) Brandy found a file of the person she was looking for.
Patient’s Name:  Nora Weird
Parent/Parental Guardian:  Adopted Father Author Fischbach
Case:  Patient Nora Weird is the adopted daughter of the Author, one of the oldest Egos of Mark Fischbach (YouTuber Markiplier) and one of the deadliest ones.  After her adopted father had been arrested and taken in by Jackieboy Man, Nora has been severally bullied.  And started to show signs of possibly having the same powers as her adopted father. Patient believes that she is not “real” and is trying to find a “Creator” to use their powers to become “real.”   If not treated and suppress these powers, then it is theorized that she too, will be as powerful and insane as her adopted father. Powers:  Being able to write things down in a story and then narrates the story.  The story and/or characters become real.
‘Oh, wow!’  That was the first thing that Brandy thought when she read that.  Wait, did they just say that one of Mark’s Ego’s is her “Adopted Father?”  Okay, this nightmare is more confusing than anything else.  How can one of Mark’s older Egos be Nora’s adopted father?  The Author isn’t real.  Brandy was here in Nora’s nightmare to help her, so Nora’s a real person like her.  Like Mark.  Alright, so this file must be made up and is mixing things up, to try and drive Nora over.
‘Hang in there Nora.  Help is on the way.’  Brandy thought to herself as she headed out of the room.  Time to explore the hospital, maybe someone will be able to help her find Nora.
======
Tagging:  @weirdmixofweirdness, @isa-ghost, @septic-dr-schneep, @nightfuryobsessed, @fischyplier, @dezzydynamite, @kangaroo-roux, @shadowsinyoursoul, @marshmallowmischief, @juju-on-that-yeet, @m4delin, @stained-puppet, @10th-no-name-person
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thegreenfairy13 · 4 years
Note
How about 3 for the whump prompt 😊 although characters are up to you.
Prompt: ‘Give me one good reason I shouldn’t splatter your brains on the floor.’ Well...as I’ve been Birds of Prey lately, I fell down the Zsaszmask (Victor Zsasz x Roman Sionis) hole and wrote a fic about their first encounter.  I just love those two bastards! I hope you like it :)
Gotham’s Truths
Victor Zsasz always thought a first meeting says a lot about how a relationship is supposed to develop in the future. That firm belief turned out to be quite untrue when it comes to one Roman Sionis. 
But then what does was Victor know? Most people would argue their first and last meeting with the infamous killer coincides. 
That’s not to say those people wouldn’t leave a lasting impression - quite the contrary. But to leave an impression that isn’t quite as obvious, well, that honor had been up to Gotham’s newest candidate for the crown of the underbelly. 
But we’ll start at the beginning, kay? 
Motherfuckin fuckwit of a peacock, Victor thinks when first laying his eyes on the man currently dangling from the ceiling in some very private basement. 
He spits on the floor, visibly disappointed by today’s task, and cracks his knuckles. This will be over embarrassingly soon. One good look at Sionis, the Black Mask, as he loves to call himself, has told him everything he needs to know. 
The wanker is just pathetic! Who the fuck wears fuckin pastels? To a shoot-out of all things? An attempt to take down Sofia Gigante is not the fuckin Oscars. And if it were, Sionis would have earned himself a Razzy. 
But then Zsasz didn’t expect much from him in the first place. The pathetic lil shit will break down within seconds, of that he’s certain. Stupid, boarding-school wimp, that one is. He’s probably lost the moment he enters a room without a drink to hold onto. 
He spits out again, this time in disgust, and goes to work. Gigante wants Sionis to get sliced into tiny pieces and fed to her genetically modified koi-carps. No problemo! 
Victor starts setting out his tools one by one. The hammer comes first. It’s decorated with one or two dried blood-stains. 
He hates the blood, though. Personally, he prefers a clean, hygienic approach to work, yet his boss insists on some crude intimidation-techniques. Oh well, employee-protection isn’t something anyone gives much thought to in Gotham. The pincers are next, followed by a shiny, new set of scalpels. 
The other man is meanwhile still dangling from the ceiling, looking at Victor’s devices. At this point, the assassin expects something like a horrified gasp, maybe an occasional cry of ‘you don’t have to do this’, or - at least - a sob. 
What he gets, though, is a high-pitched whine. “Boooooooring”, Roman cries out, sounding like an annoyed little bitch about to find out her favorite lipstick is outta stock. 
Now, that’s not an unheard-of approach, however, definitely a more unique one. 
Turning around, Victor gives Roman a seemingly uninterested once-over. The other man rolls his eyes, and wiggling his upper body, he starts swinging as if he was on a playground. 
The bastard even has the audacity to yawn. 
Grinning ferociously, Victor decides he wants the smugness gone from the other one’s face. He raises his hammer, aims for the face, and finally elicits the cry he hoped for - unless in a decidedly different context. 
Roman swings swiftly outta the way, furiously screaming, ‘not my face, not my face’ like that one hysterical chick who walked in on Victor while delivering a message to her now late husband. 
“That face is worth more than all your ugly-ass teeth combined,” the man screeches, sounding every bit like an enraged banshee. “If I’m about to get murdered with a fuckin household-appliance, at least make sure that fuckin thing from the dollar store doesn’t come near my face.”
Roman glares down at Victor from below, which is in itself an achievement, not showing the slightest bit of fear, and yelling out orders. It’s so absurd the killer has to laugh. And not just that bemused bark he sometimes coughs out, no, an honest to God, pure, heartfelt roar that whips through his entire body. 
Tilting his head to the side, he decides he’ll indulge his victim and see what else it has to offer. Tossing the hammer aside, he picks up the scalpel. Roman only rolls his eyes at him. 
“What you gonna do?” he challenges. “Carve some patterns into my skin? Ask me some questions? Wait for me to cry and beg? Pah!” 
“Well, that’s how those things usually work,” Victor confirms sensibly. He bends down until he’s at eye level with his prey, checking for those sweet, sweet signs of distress. Inhaling, he expects to smell that sour, musky scent of sweat that always indicates the beginning of his fun. 
He smells nothing but a hint of chrysanthemum and vervain. Not that Victor knows that very moment what exactly he smells. He only knows it smells good. 
He takes a better look at that skin the other man is so obviously very fond of, takes in the line of a strong jaw-line, pliant lips, fine lines from smiling too often around his eyes, and decides that, yes, that face is indeed a wonderful canvas. Too bad there won’t be much left of it once he’s done. 
Under different circumstances, he’d probably fuck the guy first and kill him later - but this is about business, not his personal pleasure. 
Roman, stop calling him Roman, Victor chides, tries suppressing a wheeze. Ah yes, he almost forgot, his ribs are already broken. The other man bares his teeth, pulls a grimace that somewhat resembles a grin, yet Victor knows the signs - he’s merely trying to mask his pain. 
Grabbing his chin, he turns the man, forces him to study him as well. Roman scoffs. “Pathetic,” is his verdict. “Look what you’ve become,” he grumbles.
“And that would be?” Victor snaps back before he can stop himself. 
“You used to be an artist!” Roman exclaims so violently the chains holding him up, start to rattle precariously. “The Da Vinci of murder you used to be! A Salvador Dali with a knife, and now? All you come up with is dangling me from the ceiling and showing me this crap.”
Victor snarls, gives him a good shove in return, and turns back to his tools. 
“Hey, how does it feel to live your life like a chained pit bull?” Roman howls instead. “Every day you get up, torture a bit, but where’s the passion? The spark? The creativity?” Victor is sure if he could, he’d gesticulate wildly. 
“Trust me, creativity will be the last thing on your mind once I’m done with you,” he snaps back.
Roman clicks his tongue, yet refuses to acknowledge that statement. “When was the last time you truly had fun?” he asks instead, managing to look smug even in his predicament. “When was the last time someone really let you loose, mm?”
Arching an eyebrow at his captive, Victor licks his lips. What a shame, truly, he thinks. He should have been given a chance to bang that vocal, little slut before cutting his throat. 
Roman smirks knowingly, and for a moment, Victor is baffled. 
“You said that out loud,” he sing-songs, as a strand of his hair loosens, elegantly framing his face. “Look,” he continues, still grinning knowingly. “I have an offer for you - you can either work for me, or kill me off and file for unemployment in about….” Roman wiggles his head from side to side, seemingly counting, when a loud bang jolts through the basement. 
“Well, I guess now,” he finishes, unfazed. 
Tilting his head, Victor considers the offer. It sounds suspiciously like Gigante is no more, and besides, he has never been especially good all on his own, without anyone to point him in the right direction. On the other hand, it’s been a long time since he enjoyed true freedom. 
But then he hasn’t met anyone who has the ability to humor him in an even longer time. 
Nodding to himself, Victor makes a decision. 
Yet before he can touch the chain, Roman stops him. “One thing though,” he declares sternly. “I demand absolute loyalty.” 
Victor sighs and pushes a button, releasing him. If there’s even one thing he’s better at than killing people, it’s serving people. 
Roman jumps to his feet almost immediately. “Eww,” he says. Wrinkling his nose in disgust as he wipes some grime from his suit before slapping Victor’s face with his palm outstretched, like a little girl. It stings viciously, though. 
Surprised, Victor looks up. 
“No more ruining my suits,” Romans orders angrily. “And now,” he continues, putting his arm around Victor’s shoulders as if they’d been friends forever. “Do you know how to make shrinking heads?” 
Baffled, the assassin follows his new boss out of the basement, slowly realizing this had been the first and last time he had the upper hand in his relationship with Roman Sionis. 
Nobody in Gotham dares to tell him that is untrue, though. 
But then it’s Gotham - and she has her own truths. 
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sunflowergirl522 · 4 years
Text
Legally Blonde 6: So Much Better
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Summary: Just a legally blonde AU with you starring as Elle Woods. Based on both the movie and musical.
Warnings: Language
Word Count: 2608
Series Masterlist | Masterlist
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“Alright Wanda, are you ready?” It’s Pietro’s birthday and Wanda had made one of those doggy cakes for him.
“I don’t know Y/n, Ultron scares the crap outta me!”
“That’s okay.” You rub your hands up and down her arms. “You can channel that fear. Remember you are a strong independent woman and you must be reunited with your dog.” You turn her around to start heading towards the trailer.
“Anyone who bakes their dog a birthday cake deserves nothing less.” Buck places his hand on her shoulder and smiles at her in reassurance.
“Oh, and it’s shaped like a bone!” Wanda takes the lid off the tray to show the bone shaped cake with ‘Woof’ on it.Bucky chuckles at that and you start to move her closer to the trailer.
“That kind of devotion cannot be ignored.”
“It’s not easy to find dog friendly chocolate substitutes.” Wanda knocks on the door and the man living there pops his head out the window.
“Ugh not you again! I want your fatass off of my property.” You cringe at the way he speaks to Wanda and get ready for a fight.
“I want to see my dog! I got a right! I bet you didn’t even know it’s his birthday today.”
“Oh is it your birthday?” He looks inside talking to the dog. “Well you can’t see him jelly gut. Best decision I ever made was throwing you out!” He snatches the cake out of her hands and shuts the window. Wanda screams in annoyance and anger.
“Can you believe I lived with that for ten years! And that cheapskate, he never even got me a ring.” You’re about to go hug Wanda when Bucky grabs your arm and turns you to face him.
“Y/n, they lived together for ten years.” He put emphasis on ten years and it clicks in your mind.
“Of course! Bucky, you are a genius.” You knock on the door and he swings it open groaning in the process. “Mister Ultron, we are Miss Maximoffs legal team.”
“Lawyers?”
“I don’t think you realize that the great commonwealth of Massachusetts recognizes your ten year relationship with Miss Maximoff as a common law marriage. And entitles her to equitable division of property.”
“Huh?”
“Which means…” You motion for Wanda to finish it off after seeing the light flood into her eyes.
“I’m taking the dog, dumbass.” Pietro comes out of the railer and Ultron grumbles as he goes back inside. The Jack Russell Terrier runs straight to Wanda and she picks him up. Bucky scratches the dogs head quickly before you all start to walk away. 
“Oh boy have I missed this face! Oh Y/n, Y/n this is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me! Thank you so much!” Wanda parts from the two of you to head home and you feel warm inside.
“Was that law? Is this the point of law? I’m feeling kind of high.”
“Are you okay?” Bucky gets concerned as he sees you place your hand on your heart.
“This is why we all study and slog, to help the underdog.” You turn to Bucky for the first part but then turn back to look at Wanda’s retreating form for the rest of it. 
“Yeah, quite literally in this case.” You laugh at his joke and he smiles at you, proud that you enjoyed using law to help Wanda. “Come on, it’s late let’s get you home.”
***
The next morning you and Bucky see a crowd of people surrounding the board in front of Pierces class. You share a look with Bucky before going up to Thor who’s closest to you and also the nicest student you’ve met. 
“What’s going on?”
“Pierce’s firm is defending a murder trial. His caseload is so big, he’s taking on first-year interns.” At that Pierce makes his way out of the hard of students and over to Bucky.
“Bucky, I’m making you my co-council on the Barton trial. Prove yourself here and the title Associate isn’t far off.”
“Yes sir!” 
“We start Monday at nine A.M. sharp.” He turns back to the hoard of students and speaks before going back to Bucky and speaking only to him. “And make sure everyone dresses appropriately.” He speeds away to get away from possible squealing.”
“Oh Bucky that’s so great! I’m so proud of you!” You put your shoulders on his shoulders and hop up and down. While you do that you here Valkyrie celebrate getting the internship. You both walk towards the list with Bucky holding your hand. As you do that Peggy makes her way out of the crowd and sees Steve.
“Steve!” This causes you to turn and watch them. “We got Pierce's internship! It’s just like we planned!”
“Babe that’s perfect!” They embrace each other and your heart breaks a bit more when they kiss. “Almost as perfect as our wedding will be.” Steve spins her the way he used to to you. Your eyes follow them as they move away to celebrate taking the rest of the crowd with them.
You’re frozen in your spot thinking about how you thought if you were patient he would love you again. You thought that with time Steve would start to respect your mind and love you again. Watching him walk away after you turned your life around for him felt like a fatal blow. Bucky taps your shoulder and points to the list after you turn around.
“Woah! Is that my name on the list? Is this a mistake? Am I even awake? Pinch me now to make sure.” You hold your arm out for Bucky and he pinches your wrist while chuckling at you. “Ow! Yes, that’s my name in black and white somehow I’m doing something right. I feel so much better than before.” You and Bucky do your handshake before he goes to get some work done. “Oh Steve, sorry I’ve been a pest but I guess my best wasn’t working with you.” Steve just turns back to his huddle of friends. You tap his shoulder and he turns back to you slightly annoyed. “But, it looks like I found a cure and I so look forward to working with you.”
“What? Working with who?” He moves quickly to look at the list.
“Do you remember when we spent spring break in the hot tub every night? We said nothing else would ever feel so right. Well, this might!” Steve had a smirk on his face until your last sentence. His head snapped to face you and frowned. “Seeing my name up on that list, that beats the first time that we kissed.” You follow Steve to the list where Peggy is already standing. “You thought I was dumb, but I guess that somebody’s judgement was poor. Seeing my name in black and white is like making love with you all night.” You smile at him glad to see him so annoyed. “No wait. It feels so much better! ‘Cause I am so much better than before.” You walk away after that ready to celebrate. 
You can’t wipe the smile off your face and think how maybe she’s what he prefers but maybe his mind and he’d look up to find that you’ve moved onto better things, better jobs or bigger rings. There’s no time for you to cry over him now because you’re too busy loving your name on the list. You take out your phone and call your mom. 
“Hey, mom.”
“Hi honey how’s law school? Are you ready to come back home?”
“I actually got an internship with my teachers firm. I’ll be working with him on a murder case. I’m doing something right here.”
“That’s great sweetie! I’ll let your dad know about it as soon as he’s back from golfing. He’ll be so proud of you. I’m so proud of you.”
“I feel so much better than I ever have before mom. Love you, I’ll let you get back to what you were doing.”
“Okay love you too Y/n.” You hang up and put your phone away.
***
At the first meeting you bump into Steve and Peggy on the way to the office. Steve walks away quickly leaving you and Peggy behind. You both stare at each other for a bit in silence before you decide to break it. “You look nice today Peggy.”
“Thank you.” You both walk to the office in silence.
Once everyone arrives Pierce begins to play a workout tape and you recognize the person in it but you can’t quite put your finger on how. Pierce pauses the video and stands up to speak.
“Meet our client, Natasha. Her very wealthy husband was found shot to death in their Beacon Hill mansion.”
“Gold digger?
“You’d think so but she was rich on her own. She has a fitness empire. She claims she didn’t kill him.”
“Did she?”
“Let’s watch some more.” Pierce plays the video again and it shows Natasha speaking of how a jump rope can be used as a defensive weapon. “Who thinks she’s guilty?” Everyone but you raise their hands. “Here’s where you kids come in, Natasha has trouble trusting me. I’m her only chance to win but I don’t speak MTV.
“I’m a Delta Nu-”
“Not now. I want her whipped into shape, if there’s a brain in that hair tell it that I’m the key to the plea or the chair.”
***
The next meeting was at the jail and you were all meeting with Natasha.
“Miss Barton I’m Bucky Barnes, your co-council during the trial. These are the interns here to help out. We are here to whip up your legal defense.” Natasha chuckles at that a bit. “We’d love to discuss your case and go over a few choices. We wanna free you as soon as possible. So you can bring your message back to your fans.”
“Good, that’s what I want. This oughta be easy.”
“Pierce briefed me on your meeting and there’s a significant amount of evidence against you. To free you the jury will need to know an alibi.”
“Not gonna happen.”
“Even though it could save you.”
“If you put me on that stand, I’m gonna be forced to lie.”
“Okay Miss Barton if we can’t hear an alibi then you should expect a plea bargain.” Seve walks over to the table they’re sitting at as if he owns the place.
“And admit to something I didn’t do?”
“With a plea bargain you’d be out in a couple of years. That sounds reasonable, right?” Peggy sounds annoyed at Natasha as she speaks.
“Reasonable to do time for my husband's killer? Hmm, not really.”
“She’s tough.” Valkyrie whispers to you before also approaching Natasha. “Yo, sister.”
“Yo, not related. You know I need a legal team that knows I’m innocent. Get out of here, all of you. Guard!” Everyone leaves but you wait with your back to her hearing her muffled sobs. You make a split second decision to try something.
“Who, who is the girl with loyal friends and true?” You snap twice.
“Who, who?” She snaps twice back at you.
“Who, who has a bond as strong as crazy glue?” You turn around and face her and she hesitantly turns to you too.
“Who, who?”
“Who can sound the call and sisters all come through?”
“Who, who? Delta Nu Nu Nu. Delta Nu Nu Nu. You are a Delta Nu. Delta Nu Nu Nu. Delta Nu Nu Nu. You are a Delta Nu.” As you both speak together you do the hand signals to the Delta Nu song and speed up as you get closer to the end of the song.
“Delta Nu’s former UCLA president Y/n Y/l/N. I knew I recognized your mugshot.”
“Shut up.”
“Oh yeah. Your DVDs got me in shape to be June in the girls of UCLA calendar.”
“That is so great. Thank God somebody on this legal team gets me.”
“Sisterhood’s forever.” You hold out your pinky and she takes it to do the Delta Nu shake. “I believe you Natasha and I will fight with everything I have to clear your name. But that involves an alibi.”
“I can’t tell it.”
“Everyone has their secrets. For years I denied my highlights.” You bend your head down and she looks to see said highlights.
“It’s beyond highlights, Y/n it’s a disgrace. My secret is nuclear and if it gets out, I could lose my fitness empire. Which means everything to me. If I tell you, will you Delta Nu sister swear not to tell anybody?”
“I will double Delta Nu sister swear.”
“Your hardcore. Okay here it is.” She hooks your elbows together. “On the day that my husband was killed I had…” She then says something so low that you can’t hear it.
“What? I can’t hear you.”
“Liposuction! Minimally invasive , outpatient lipo, but lipo!” You gasp and cover your mouth in shock. A guard comes over to get Natasha to take her back to her cell. “I had to do it serious cottage cheese was showing up on my ass.” The guard grabs onto her and starts to pull her away. 
“Your secret’s safe with me.”
“My followers are depending on me, I cannot let them down. You have to take care of me Y/n, you swore.”
“Y/n there you are.” Bucky’s voice rings out and you turn to face him and everyone else.
“Where’s Natasha?” Pierce asks and you can’t help but wonder when he showed up.
“The guard just took her back.”
“Great.”
“But I got the alibi.”
“You’re kidding?” Pierce sounds shocked as if he expected you not to be able to do anything. “So what is it?”
“I’m afraid I can’t tell you.”
“Why not?”
“Because I double Delta Nu sister swore not to.”
“Y/n this is not some little sorority thing.” Peggy steps in front of you.
“Oh I know it’s a big sorority thing. But don’t worry Natasha really had nothing to do with this.” Everyone circles around you looking annoyed that you won’t tell the alibi. Except for Bucky who just looks confused. “Think about it, Natasha’s a fitness queen, exercise gives you endorphins, and endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don’t kill.”
“Bucky, a word.” They both step away from the group.
“Y/n, are you serious? If you don’t give up the alibi we will all lose this case.”
“Then I guess we aren’t very good lawyers.” Peggy then groans in annoyance at you and walks away.
“Would you stop being a Marilyn? Look Boobear, Y/n.” Steve takes the hands that were skimming down your arms off and clears his throat looking over at Peggy. “Look Pierce wants that alibi, give it to him and you can sail through law school knowing that there’s a big fat job offer waiting for you when you get out.”
“But I gave Natasha my word.” You’re getting real tired of being ganged up on.
“So what, who cares?”
“Who cares?!” You huff and turn to look at Bucky and catch the last part of their conversation.
“Bucky, let me be clear. This is your chance, and I gave you simple instructions. Lead this legal team and get me an alibi. You’re zero for two.” He begins to walk out of the room. “Everyone field trips over. Let’s go. Back to work.” Everyone passes him but he stands in the way of the two of you. “Except you two. I’d rather not see ratty corduroy or legally blonde again today.”
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⁂ How Do You Love? (Tenipuri) o3
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I slid out of the cab and stared up at the Echizen residence. Kenko went to grab the bags from the trunk while Ryoma went straight through the gate and up to the front door. Wanting to hurry up and get back to sleep, I imagine. I heard the trunk lid slam shut followed by the sound of the engine fading away into the quiet night.
Kenko bumped my shoulder with his own. “You okay?”
I shrugged, grabbing my bag from his hand. “You’re staying the night, right?”
“Of course! I love Rinko-san’s cooking~”
I rolled my eyes as I pushed the gate open. “Gee, don’t I feel special.”
“Don’t act like you’re offended.”
Rinko greeted us at the door. She smiled brightly, pulling me into a tight embrace. “Welcome home, Lux.”
“Thanks,” I muttered softly, patting her back awkwardly with my free hand. I’ve never been big on hugs, but I didn’t want to be mean to the woman that practically raised me. She’s always been so kind, the least I can do is return that.
She pulled away. “I’m sure you’re tired. Go on up to bed and we’ll talk tomorrow, okay?”
Without a word, we headed up the stairs to my bedroom. Nothing had been touched like I was expecting – that damn old man loved to go through my shit. Doing his ‘fatherly duty’, he claims, but we both know damn well that he’s looking for blackmail material. Not that he’s gonna find anything – I’d never leave something behind that could be used against me.
I fell face-first onto the sheets, ice-cold due to the air conditioner. I could feel Kenko crawl over me to lay with his back against the wall. When I opened my eyes, I was met with a pair of pale feet. I scowled, flicking the top of his foot.
“Throw me a pillow, please~ … ouch!”
He got what he asked for – I did in fact throw him a pillow. Not my fault it hit him in the face. “Why can’t you sleep on the floor, huh?”
“Because it’s not comfortable, obviously.”
“This bed’s too small, damn it,” I muttered, turning over to face away from the wall. “If you kick me, you die.”
“Yes, yes~ Good night, Lux.”
“Night, Kenko.”
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“Luxray-chan~ Wake u~p!”
My first flew out from under the covers, making contact with a face. A yelp soon followed. I sat up, glaring at him through half-lidded eyes. “Asshole, I told you to stop calling me that!”
“How can you be so violent as soon as you wake up?” Kenko rubbed his bright red cheek. “You wouldn’t wake up and it’s almost eleven o’clock. The day is wasting away~”
I scoffed, wanting nothing more than to go back to sleep – I was seriously jet-lagged. I knew there was a very slim chance of that happening, though, so I forced myself out of the bed. He followed me down the stairs, humming softly.
My cousin, Nanako, was at the sink washing dishes – most likely from the breakfast that we missed. Well, Kenko probably ate, anyway. Rinko was nowhere to be found – probably out shopping or got called into work. The old man was lying down on the porch, flipping through one of his dirty magazines.
I approached him, kneeling down behind him. “You never change, old man.”
He grinned over his shoulder. “Welcome home, kid.”
“U-Uncle!” Nanako cried, rushing over to us. “How can you read that smut in front of your daughter?”
He shrugged, turning back to his magazine. “Lux doesn’t care, ne?”
“Why would I?” I shrugged, heading over to grab a piece of bacon off the table. “Doesn’t affect me. He can do whatever he wants. Besides, he even asked me to bring some playboy home from the states. I forgot, by the way.”
He frowned. “I figured.”
“Don’t encourage him, Lux!”
I rolled my eyes. Honestly, why is she constantly worried so much about what the old man does? How annoying. “Is Ryoma still sleeping?”
“He left thirty minutes ago,” Oyaji answered as he stood up, shoving the magazine into his robe before Nanako could grab it. He sat down beside me and grabbed the last piece of bacon from Kenko’s hand.
“Where’d he go?”
“Kakinokizaka junior tennis tournament.”
“What would you like to eat?” Nanako questioned with a smile. “Wait, Lux – !”
I ignored her calls, slipping on my boots before rushing out the door. That brat, why didn’t he say anything about it? He’s so fucking cheeky, it’s easy for him to make enemies. So many people tried to attack him back in the states – would Japan be the same way? Rushed footsteps headed toward me and Kenko threw his arm around my shoulder to stop me from moving forward.
“Do you even know where the tennis gardens are?” He raised a brow, fighting back a smile when I scowled at him.
“I would’ve found it.”
“Before or after he finds trouble?”
“…”
He chuckled, moving his arm to wrap around my own as we continued on in the same direction. “Well, it’s good to see your instincts are still on point – you were going in the right direction.”
“Don’t doubt me, Kenko.”
“I would never~”
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“Where the hell is that kid?” I muttered, shoving my hands into my pockets. We had been searching this damned place for about thirty-five minutes without any sign of him.
“Maybe he finished his match and went home.” Kenko reasoned.
“Ryoma-kun!” A female voice reached my ears and I took off in the direction it came from. We were lead to one of the nearby courts.
Ryoma was on his hands and knees with a girl kneeling beside him. When I got closer, I noticed his hand covering his face, and… is that blood?
I felt anger boiling in my veins as my narrowed eyes snapped to the guy on the other side of the court. “You mother fucker!”
Kenko grabbed me around my neck and waist, the heels of his feet digging into the ground from the effort it took to hold me back. “You can’t kill someone on your first day back in Japan! At least wait a week!”
“Screw that! He hurt Ryoma!”
“Don’t come onto the court during a game.” Ryoma scolded, pushing the girl away. He stood up, revealing a small cut on the center of his forehead. Blood was dripping down his nose. “Your grip is weak. Mada mada dane.”
I struggled against Kenko’s grip, turning toward my baby brother. “Kick his ass, Ryo!”
The match resumed but the white-haired idiot never loosened his grip on me. Ryoma jumped into the air and hit the kid with his twist serve, nearly smacking him in the face with the ball.
“Hey grandma, didn’t that ball spin the other way?”
I glanced over toward the voice and saw the girl standing beside an older woman. That woman looks really familiar, but I don’t have time to dwell on that thought. Ryoma served again and, this time, the ball smacked the kid right in the face, sending him to his hands and knees.
“That’s my boy!”
“You shouldn’t encourage violence among kids, Lux-chan~”
Another twist serve.
Another hit to the face.
“Go to hell!” I growled at him. Ryoma hit a normal serve but the boy screamed in fear and fell into the fetal position. “Stupid,”
“Game and set. Won by Echizen.”
I rushed over to him, dragging Kenko with me – since he still hadn’t let me go. I whipped his hat off and grabbed his chin to force him to look up at me. I inspected the wound and was relieved to find that it was just a scratch. It had stopped bleeding, as well. I ruffled his hair before giving his hat back. “I’m proud of you, kiddo.”
“Fool. I wasn’t playing seriously.” The boy stood up and smirked. “I can beat you if there was one more set!”
“Sasabe, just stop… just admit that you lost…”
“You think you’re so tough. I’ll show you tough, you son of a – ” I was stopped by Ryoma this time, his hand wrapped tight around my wrist.
He moved to stand in front of me. “It’s fine with me if you want to play one more set.” He switched the racket to his dominant hand and I smirked.
“Don’t you get it? You stubborn fool…” The old woman spoke up, crossing her arms over her chest and grinning. “You can’t beat Echizen Ryoma no matter how many times you try.”
I raised my brow as I looked at her. She seemed pretty knowledgeable about my brother. It’s not so much of a surprise – he’s hella accomplished in the tennis world, especially for being so young. Still, it felt like she knew something else.
“What are you talking about?” Sasabe demanded.
I stepped off the court as Ryoma got into position to serve. I sent the bastard a grin. “He’s left-handed, dumbass!”
Ryoma’s serve was twice as powerful, slamming against the court between the kid’s legs hard enough to leave a mark.
Sasabe fell straight onto his ass. “I quit!” He cried before running away with his tail tucked between his legs.
“What a pussy.” I scoffed, folding my arms. “Will you let go already?”
He rested his chin on my shoulder. “Promise not to commit mass murder?”
“If you don’t let me go, you’ll be the first one I kill.”
He finally released me and I followed my brother as he put his racket away into his bag. I glanced at the older woman as we passed and got this strange sense of deja vu. Damn, why did she seem so familiar? It’s bugging the crap outta me.
I scowled, turning slightly toward her. “Oi, what’s your name?”
She looked at me in surprise before smiling kindly. That was not a smile that you give to a strange; it was too… familiar. “Ryuzaki Sumire.”
Even the name sounds familiar. My brow furrowed in thought.
“Nee-chan,” Ryoma called.
I decided to let it go, following after him. It probably wasn’t important anyway.
“What was that about?” Kenko questioned.
“Nothing. She just looked familiar.”
“Do you recognize her, Ryo-chan?”
“Nope.”
“Not important, then.” He shrugged. “How’d the tournament go?”
“I forfeited.”
“Why?” I scowled, glancing down at him.
He shrugged. “I was late for the match.”
I facepalmed. What the hell am I gonna do with this kid?
Echizen Ryoma, you will be the death of me.
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xxtutticutyxx · 4 years
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New HP Au (Draco X FemReader)
So, hear me out. What if the night when Peter ratted out the Potters, he also told them that Voldemort was coming? That way, when he arrived, the entire Order of the Pheonix would be there to beat the crap outta him, eventually winning the battle with no casualties because of how outnumbered Voldemort was. This left Harry to have a normal childhood with both of his parents and a pair of loving uncles.
Now, this is the part where the X Reader comes in. A few months after they beat Voldermort, Lily finds out she´s pregnant with you, the reader, making you about a year younger than Harry. You grow up with a protective older brother, a werewolf uncle (who, may I mention is dating Sirius in this Au) and her two rich parents. Life was great for you.
Ok, so most events that didn´t revolve around voldemort occur during the story, like how Harry and Ron got to Hogwarts in the flying car in their second year, or how the triwizard tournaments came back in their fourth year. Since (Y/n) is a year younger than Harry, she would have to have gone by train the year that they crashlanded the car at Hogwarts, leaving her alone with people she didn´t know. This is where she meets Draco.
While looking for an available cabin to sit at, she saw Draco sitting alone while reading one of his old potions book and asked him if she could sit with him. He looked t her weirdly and asked for her name. She responded with “I´m (Y/n) Lily Potter, it´s nice to meet you! What´s your name?” He was surprised to say the least and immediatly asked her if she was related to Harry. She happily said yes and asked for his name again, a bit more annoyed considering her question had been ignored. He introduced himself and waited for her to jump off and start talking badly about how he treated her brother, but was suprised when, instead, she was amazed at how his name roughly translated to “Rich Dragon” and started ranting on and on about dragons and how amazing they were.
To say Draco didn´t expect that was an understatement. He absolutely despised Harry Potter, yet here his sister was, rambling about dragons and how she wanted to be able to tame them one day. He was intrigued, so he let her stay and continue this one-sided conversation. This lasted for about almost the entirety of the train ride, only having short interactions with the boy asking about a certain type of dragon or stating an opinion about their treatment. He may never admit it, but he was happy someone was treating him like a person for once, instead of like a boss or an enemy.
After getting sorted into Gryffindor and sitting at the grand table, her brother showed up with his best friend, Ron, and asked her how the train ride went and whether she made any friends yet. He had expected her to say that she sat with Ginny, considering they had met a few times, but went into shock when she told him she had befriended The Draco Malfoy, leaving him to glare lightly at the boy across the room. How dare he come near his sister. He put his feelings aside for the moment and calmed down, deciding to have a word with him later, after celebrating the start of a new year. 
As midnight aproached and most kids were in bed, (Y/n) finished putting all of her things away, claiming the bed right next to Ginny´s and a girl she learned was named Sophie, a girl who would soon become one of her least favourite people, considering how she becomes one of her full-time bullies (because we all need Harry and Draco to team up to beat the shit out of someone for you).
After some of your first clases, you find Draco walking around with two other guys (Crab and Goyle), so you obviously went to say hello. Both of the guys behind him looked confused as hell, but ended up really liking you and tried adopting you as their “huffle buddy” (like how most slytherins adopt a hufflepuff). Draco told them to “Piss off” cause you didn´t even know what that was and you were clearly a gryffindor, meaning that you could not be their “huffle buddy”.
You kept talking with them for a while until you heard a familiar voice call your name. As you turned around you saw your brother running full speed to drag you away from Draco´s little “squad”, saying how they were a bad influence on you and so on. You scolded him for even thinking that he got a say in who you befriended and said that they were having a conversation he so rudely interrupted. Then you started talking back to him as he said that you both needed to leave, leading to him grabbing at your wrist and forcefully drag you away. 
In that moment of anger, Harry gripped a little to hard and ended up making your wrist hurt, making you yell at him about the pain. This triggered something in Draco and he immediatly told him to “Back off Potter” and that “(Y/n)´s allowed to hang out with whoever she wanted”. Harry got even madder at this statement and resulted in expelliarmusing his ass away from you, still dragging you to where the rest of the golden trio was.
When you got there, Harry released his grip as you glared at him, Hermione yelling at him for being so brute. Ginny went with you to Madam Pomfrey to get your wrist healed up. You stayed there for a bit until it stopped bruising and you put a bandage on it for the rest of the day. Ginny asked why Harry was so mad, and you told her you were hanging out with a friend. She raised her eyebrow at you before asking if you still wanted to hang out with them. You obviously nodded and she led you to her older twin brothers, Fred and George. 
You had met them both before and those two loved pranking you for some reason. Ginny asked her brothers to “show” you around the castle, to which they bothh agreed seriously. You stared at all three of them, but followed when they told you to acompany them to the commonroom for a while. 
When you all got there, the twins called you to a secluded part of the room and showed you a blank sheet of paper. “Strange” you thought, until they said something along the lines of mischief? or something? Suddenly, the paper turned into a map of the castle. They briefed you on all of the passage ways and told you which were better for hiding in plain sight. You stared in awe and thanked them before heading off to the one closest to slytherin house, where you would hopefully meet your friend.
On that journey, you learned that you had very little sense of direction and got pretty lost before finally finding the one you needed. You entered the seemingly endless hallway and exited just in time to scare the living shit out of your friend. He was about to enter his house when you screamed “Boo!” and he yelled like a little kid. He glared angrily at the direction of the sound before staring dumbfounded at your lauging figure. You then told him you came to say hi and continue your chat from earlier, apologizing for your brothers behaviour before continuing your argument about why (insert dragon) was better than (insert other dragon). The conversation continued until it got late and you had to return, starting what would become one of the greatest friendships you ever had.
The book would take place in (Y/n)´s fourth year at Hogwarts, this is all more of an introduction to the story and how it works. I honestly think I want to write this, but I usually leave my books halfway because I lack motivation. What do you guys think about the idea?
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harveywritings92 · 5 years
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Happy Death day to you [Dante’s Version.]
She's dead...she's dead, his Y/n was dead? how-how could she..."I was only gone for three days..wh-" he dropped the floor still processing Trish had told him, some truck driver ran a red light as some kids were crossing..he was drunk and didn't even notice them...Y/n ran out into the street and shoved them outta of the way and took the hit, She died on impact...
And with it Dante's will to live died with her, alcohol only numb him up, women? no point they weren't his N/n...His friends and family were worried about him, he didn't even go to her funeral. The half-Devil kept expecting the y/height woman to walk through his door like nothing happen ask how his gig went and life would return to normal...But no such luck. Y/n was dead and she wasn't coming back.
Three weeks later...
Dante was at a diner with Morrison and Patty they managed to dragged him out of his room with the prospects of a job. In reality they just wanted to get him outside and try to help him get back to normal goofball Dante. As Morrison explained the job details.
Dante's dull blue eyes traveled to a booth a few tables away he cocked a brow at the odd bunch, which consisted of a bald man with an olive complexion, tired grey eyes and an aura that screamed 'I'm too old for this crap.' Who was giving out orders and handing out post-it to the other's at his table.
a 40 something blond woman in a mailman's uniform and a wash out hippie who looked like Tommy Chong's lost love child. and for some reason an empty space, *Must have a few screws lose...*  he thought as a waitress blocked his view of the hippie.
The old man and mail-Woman ordered breakfast the the hippie ordered a coffee to go, the Waitress then gestured to the empty space next to him. "And you?" the waitress asked boredly as the mail woman snorted while the old man smirked.
"She means you Nibblet." he said taking a sip of water, Dante's brow furrowed who was he talking to? there were only three people at their booth. "I...y-you can see me?" a small very familiar voice croaked the half-devil's heartbeat spiked.
The waitress looked at the fourth person annoyed "Dammit Nate, what have I told you about bringing your junkie friends around here?!" Hippie put his hands up in defense and waitress sneered at the "junkie" who was gawking at her bewildered.
"She not a junkie, that's his niece she just woke up..and she'll take a coffee too." the old man said curtly to the embarrassed waitress who just left to get their order, Dante's eyes winded in shock at the sight of his dead girlfriend sitting in the booth clothes covered in blood with her knees pulled to her chest gawking at the direction the waitress went as Nate spoke up "My niece, what's all that noise?" Only the be talked over by the Y/n who pointed at the waitstaff confused.
"How the hell could she see me? you said I was like a ghost!"   
"Yes, I did say that didn't I?"
"Then what was..how?"
"If you weren't so busy crying, you would've heard me say you were incubating." He said as the waitress returned with their food and drinks, The bald man smiled at the sight of his scrambled eggs and waffles, as the h/c woman looks at him expectantly.
 "Oh, I'm not telling you, that's his job." he said pointing his fork at Nate who look at him stunned "Are you out of your mind Glenn?!" the hippie shouted causing everyone in the diner to looked at him, the scruffy man blanched waved everyone off.
"I can't haul around some roadie and work at the same time." His hissed at this the blond woman to snorted "Work..he calls it." as Nate glared at her before looking around the diner for something "Where Ash? let her take the roadie..." he said as Glenn shook his head. "Who do you think Nibblet's here to replace?" he said suddenly causing a pregnant pause in the group as Glenn kept eating his waffles.
"Ash is..gone?" Blondie said suddenly not hungry anymore as she her oatmeal away and Nate slowly sat down "She didn't even say goodbye." he said as Y/n looked at them confused as the balding sighed "Y'know she couldn't have; even if that was choice, Now get her cleaned and show her how things work." 
Glenn said numbly before returning to his breakfast as Nate looked he wanted to cry but sighed "This way Roadie." he gestured for Y/n to follow him all while Dante sat frozen still processing what he had just witnessed. The half-devil was brought out of it by Patty snapping her finger fingers "Dante are you listening?" she huffed as Morrison stared at him concerned. 
The devil hunter look at them then back at the booth Y/n and that Nate guy were gone, Blondie was having a hushed argument with Glenn. His brow furrowed as nodded towards the booth. "Did you both see that?" He asked shaken and clearly wondering if his mind had finally snapped, Patty looked a the booth incredulously before snorting.
"Oh yeah, the guy who dumped jello and ketchup on his niece! that was funny." she giggled as Morrison chuckled along " His brother really laid it into him didn't he?" the two continued laughing while Dante couldn't believe what he was hearing, that's not what happened at all! how could they have heard something completely different from what he had? distressed Dante got up from the table and went outside ignoring Morrison and Patty calling him. 
But alas they were both long gone it would be another month before he saw Y/n's look alike again. And at that point he concluded that it had to be a demon posing as his dead girlfriend...They must've taken a page from Mundas and created it to manipulate him for something...But for what? Dante was drawing blanks, he was walking back to the shop one afternoon with a fresh bottle of cheap whiskey in hand.
When someone careened into Dante knocking them to the ground, the half-devil didn't even flinch as he stopped in his tracks and looked down at the person, They were wearing a hoodie they couldn't see them properly. However before he could ask if they were okay or help them up, the person shot up to their feet giving him a clear look at their face Y/n...
"Sorry Da...Dude." She check her watch." Fuck I am so late!" she hissed rushing down the street. Not noticing Dante following her watching as she took out a post-it and looked at the street signs, finally looking relieved *must've have found the street she was looking for...* the hunter thought as he watched her turn the corner.
Dante hesitated it could be an ambush... or it could be the answer to what the hell was going on? taking a breath Dante rounded the corner to see a very disturbing scene; Y/n standing over a mangled body of a man, who'd obviously gotten run over and left for dead in the back street like a piece of garbage. the half-devil brows furrowed as he watched from the shadows as gremlin looking demons hissed and sneered at the h/c woman who just waved them off.
"Yeah, yeah I know!" she huffed before reaching her hand out towards the corpse. "Hey buddy, c'mon time to get up pal!" she said as a ghostly hand extended from the body grabbing hers, Dante's blue eyes widened shock as Y/n pulled a guy out of the mangled remains or rather his spirit. the guy looked at her confused then down at his body.
"Oh god, i-s that??"
"Yep, that's you."
"What... I'm...Who are you??" the guy stammered looked back and fourth at her and his body incredulously Y/n winced glaring at her watch, she didn't have time for this! "Y/n, grim reaper, harvesters of souls.. giver of jack shit. yada-yada, could you speed this up? I got three more appointments after you." She said rolling her hand at the dude who looked her up and down in disbelief, "But you're not a skeleton." he sputtered out the obvious as Y/n nodded and started to walk away.
"That's Fairy-tale bull-shit, listen I would've gotten here sooner. but the city bus scheduling is a joke!" she hiss throwing her hands in the air as the dude sighed in annoyance. "Tell me about it..." with that his soul faded away as Y/n walked out of the street just barely missing getting crushed by an AC unit.
"You missed motherfuckers!" she shouted as two of those little gremlin demons crawled down from the roofs and started arguing with each other. Y/n shook her head as took out a new post-it [T.j. Miller DTOD 14:14] the address it was close by, her tired e/c eyes checked her watch she still had an hour to kill...
she sighed bumping into something "arg...what is with me and bumping int-" she her voice dead when she saw who she bumped into Dante...pointing Ebony right at her face Y/n slowly put her hands up as she broke out into a cold sweat, she heard the safety unlock as the h/c mouth felt dry swallowed hard and croaked out the only thing she could think of at the moment. "...Aw Shit." 
{[BANG!]}
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Incoming TROS rant
yes, there will be spoilers as I will be breaking down everything I saw tonight. If I manage to type choking on my tears well after the movie finished.
----
FINAL WARNING IF YOU DON’T WANT SPOILERS
Let’s start with a few opening words, this rant will indeed be a long one.
ALL THE LEAKS ARE TRUE. And I mean ALL of them. To a T. As soon as I saw the first half was exactly as I’d read, I was crushed. As I knew what was coming. On that note, i was probably the only person in the theatre who was crying like 15-20 minutes before we were supposed to, I’ll get to that in a bit. I’m saving the WORST for last. Let’s break this shit down.
1. The plot is a mess. An actual mess. I feel like every five minutes I was shaking my head and mumbling ‘what kind of nonsense is this’. The breaking of lore or COMMON SENSE really is substantial. But that is definitely not what I cared about, as I already KNEW this even without the leaks. When you can’t get your two directors to FUCKING WORK TOGETHER TO MAKE A COHESIVE STORYLINE it is bound to grasp for straws and make shit up. IT AIN’T NOTHING NEW.
2. Here’s the kicker. THE DIALOGUE WAS SO BAD, it makes Anakin’s AOTC speech seem like a hymn, or poetry or whatever. They CONSTANTLY say what they’re doing, they’re literally reciting the exposition to each other and it comes off as extremely annoying and makes you feel like a toddler. No hate against toddlers, but I’d rather not be one right now. It feels unnatural, forced and STUPID to the point where I would start WISHING for 3PO to come back on screen because Anthony Daniels somehow managed to snag some actually decent lines for once? I love the man, but the droid usually really annoys the crap outta me. He was literally the highlight of the film. Don’t get me started on the stupidity of all of Lando’s lines, poor Billy. Daisy has to stare angrily most of the time so I don’t really care to recall her lines. Adam, my dear Adam, he tries SO HARD to make do with what he was given but even his lines 90% of the time come off as stupid and out of place. Or the worst type in this movie, EXPOSITIONYY. Don’t get me started on Mark Hamill and Harrison Ford. Boys looked like they didn’t sign up for this shit and were literally force choked to be there. I feel you guys, I feel you. ALSO FOR THE LOVE OF THE FORCE THE TIMES THEY REPEATED WORD FOR WORD LINES FROM OTHER MOVIES I WANTED TO SCREAM. Once is too much, THIS MANY TIMES IT IS A FELONY. And it needs to be punished somehow.
3. Let’s get the positives out of the way because there were FEW. The two scenes I actually REALLY enjoyed watching, for different reasons were:
Ben and Palps meeting. The scene was much longer than the clip and SUPER badass. Sheev’s voice echoes, Ben looks fucking cool and the whole scene is GORGEOUS.
The other is when Ben fights as a Jedi in the end. I’ll get to Ben later BELIEVE ME but without overexplaining, he fights with Anakin’s lightsabre, he’s really speedy and is doing all the Jedi spins and whatnot. I fucking ATE THAT UP. Replay that scene forever please CAUSE I LOVED IT. But I was already crying here so we’ll touch more on that later.
To conclude this segment, the visuals were SUPERB, the sound was AMAZING and (some) of the fights were jaw droppingly cool. But that about concludes the positives!
4. I will comment, as I know a lot of people will care even if I don’t particularily. Finn, Poe, Rose and the merry gang aside from our Jedi are reduced to EH this movie. If you thought you’d never miss Rose boy were you wrong. They introduce new characters and expect you to care about them when they SIDELINED the ones they’d hoped you’d care about BEFORE. And it made me care about NO ONE. Not to mention that, sadly, they are ALWAYS reduced to the boring side plot that really isn’t interested or key to much of ANYTHING. Sure they roused the people and all but would’ve been TOAST if Rey didn’t go all Jesus on the fleet. So at the end of the day, you MAY find some enjoyment with the side characters but their lines were some of the worst, you WILL be force fed new people and you might not really enjoy your previous faves here because even I found myself being completely indifferent this time. (I actually really ENJOYED Finn since TFA. He had a compelling storyline and John Boyega was alright. Couldn’t give two wits about him in this movie. Not a single one. But again, I may not be the perfect person to ask if you really,really like any of these characters.
5. Finally, we have arrived to the main event. THE REYLO.
The backbone of this clusterfuck of a new trilogy. The last Skywalker and Palpatine, coming together instead of apart. The arguably BEST actors (legacies aside) Disney managed to get. Now, I will start this off that I didn’t HATE Rey before this movie. I loved her in TFA, enjoyed her less in TLJ but the novelization fixed that. I was BACK ON BOARD to be her number one stan. In this movie, I couldn’t STAND her. Her lines are basically the director walking you through things, her plotline was obviously made last minute so almost none of it makes sense,  I literally wanted to curl up and DIE from cringing so hard every time someone said ‘you’re a Palpatine’. I thought I was looking at a very expensive rendition of terrible fan fiction. (Not to diss fan fiction in any way, you guys will be my heroes after this catastrophe.) ‘Empress Palpatine’, COME THE FUCK ON AND GET OUT WITH THIS SHIT. Bring back crusty old Snoke for crying out loud! Or even HUX! Who got killed off in a second and had three lines of dialogue, not important I guess? Like a great many things I guess, JJ. But, EVEN Palpatine aside, it was great seeing him again and every scene he was in I got chills, who cares that it makes zero sense at this point. Back to reylo.
Ben. Ben Solo Organa Skywalker. The last hope. The final remnant of something I have loved FOREVER. I grew up with Star Wars, like many others just in a different, post prequel era and they are still my favourites. This might sound ridiculous but Star Wars was part of my heart, my happiness. It brought me joy to watch it, read it, fantasize about it and have it in my life when times were dark or miserable. It MEANT something to me, as I am sure many of you will agree. And Ben was part of that. He was part of something that MEANT something to all of us. He was the last line of the characters we all grew up with and loved. The GRANDSON of Anakin, my favourite character of all time. This was their chance to stop the trend that Loki’s death in IW and Daenerys’ death and turn and many others started and STOP killing people who did wrongs. PEOPLE can change, they can grow and they can learn. Hell, to not stray to far from this franchise REY has killed A LOT of people in this movie alone. She DECIMATES the room full of Palpatine’s followers and never blinks an eye. SHE NEARLY KILLS CHEWIE, DOES KILL BEN (for a minute) and SHE DOESN’T NEED TO DIE. Of course she doesn’t but BEN DOESN’T EITHER. After all that YOU JJ, YES YOU, show me that the LAST SKYWALKER has gone through, suffered, alone and frightened. I would’ve ENDED you if you’d suggested killing him off to me, EVER. He was your chance to do a reverse Vader, AS YOU CLAIMED YOU WOULD. To show a character can come back to the light and be worthy of it WITHOUT DYING. You even set it up as such, which is my next and CRUCIAL POINT.
I’ve been a reylo since 2015. Their dynamic has always been fascinating to me and beautiful. I LOVED all the moments in TLJ, LOVED THEM. In this one, every time they force bond (terrible dialogue aside, again) I was happy. I had a hope that she would bring him back from the darkness and he will keep her balanced. WELL, JJ, guess fuck me huh? And anyone with common sense and human decency. JUST WHEN you shove Ben’s turn in my face, you make him talk to Han, you make him strut in to fight alongside Rey in full Ben Solo Jedi mode, hair blown and casually dressed. It was when he runs onto Exegol that I started weeping. Because knowing that he dies as I did, it broke my heart how it was done. You give me the scene where he fights and you give me hope of what his future could’ve been if only you’d listened to reason and done what was supposed to be done. He is chucked into the pit, WHICH MIGHT I ADD WOULD’VE MADE ME MAD IF THAT WAS HIS END BUT WOULD’VE BEEN SOOOO MUCH BETTER THAN WHAT WE GOT, comes back. And now comes the scene that cemented this as the ABSOLUTE WORST insult to me as a fan, possible. Ben is heartbroken that Rey is dead, the moment is sad and he cradles her dead body and hugs her desperately. Which would’ve been a beautiful and GOOD DIFFERENT type of ending. Or rather not having her die at all and being NEAR her death and him saving her and both living happily ever after BUT NO. JJ AFTER THAT has her come back, smile happily when she sees it’s him, her love her hope and the other half of her SOUL literally (the diad or whatever it’s called is so rare that Palpatine was thrilled they’d formed such a bond, basically space soulmates), he has them kiss, then hold each other and smile at each other with genuine feeling of joy and belonging both of them had sought all their life AND THEN YANKS IT FROM UNDER YOU. The scene where Ben falls flat onto his back is quite comical and I couldn’t help but laugh in my misery and sobbing. Rey doesn’t even cry, we don’t even LINGER on his body or mourn him afterwards or even mention it or EVEN SEE her, THE PERSON WHO LITERALLY FOUND HER SOULMATE AND WAS SO HAPPY WHEN SHE KISSED HIM AND WAS LITERALLY SAVED BY HIM, but no guess that doesn’t require a scene, sure, fuck it LIKE EVERYTHING ELSE. The cheery music that plays up until the moment of his fall, YES THE FALL OF SKYWALKER MIND YOU NOT A FUCKING RISE, was an insult to every fan everyhwere, lifelong or recent or otherwise, it was a punch to the gut, a slap in the face and after this happened I no longer paid attention to the movie. I’d been crying for some time leading up to the moment, I knew what was coming and the execution only made it worse and a more desperate cry rather than only sad, I was hoping it wouldn’t happen somehow. I choked back tears until I finally got home and cried. One of the things which MEANT so much to me, was dead. I no longer have any doubts, that this was intentional. Look at Game of thrones, that was this year. It seemed intentional to make series stop, right? Everyone agrees. They wanted to finally bury the Skywalkers so they could make something unrelated? They kill off all the Skywalkers. Well guess what disney? YOU DIDN’T HAVE TO BRING THEM BACK IN THE FIRST PLACE, YOU MONEY HUNGRY PIECE OF SHIT. No one would have minded a new trilogy, with new characters doing NEW things. Why even drag the Skywalkers and the leagies into this if YOU DON’T WANT THEM HERE? All you got was millions of lifelong fans of the old movies who have already felt or are only now beginning to feel BETRAYED. I swear it disney, I don’t want to feel this misery again. You won’t take Star Wars away from me and the joy it brought me. I will without a care in the world dismiss this new trilogy as something completely separate from canon. You’ve killed your own fanbase. You could’ve had us but you LOST us. You dangled something we wanted in front of us for our money and then you ripped it apart.
If you are anything like me, anything like me at all and have loved SW for however long. if it MEANS ANYTHING TO YOU, I beg you not to see this movie or at the very least, pay for it. You WILL feel betrayed, insulted, heartbroken, devastated and miserable, as I am feeling right now. I was supposed to go see this movie another two times but i cannot and will not spend another CENT on a company that chooses to alienate me. Fine, have it your way. I’m done.
This concludes my rant as I am tired and upset. If I missed out on anything and you are interested in anything else, please do DM me or leave a comment :) We’re all in this together now, the reylos the antis the new fans and the old. We’re all in the same heartbreaking boat, I love you all. And I will love Star Wars. The REAL Star Wars forever. I wasn’t even sad the ‘FRANCHISE’ was ending because it wasn’t. It had ended a long, long time ago.
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naromoreau · 5 years
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For Love I Come
A fic no one asked for jaksdh. Thank you so much to @outranks for giving me the idea and betaing and being and absolute sweetheart about it. Thank you so much!!!!! and also to @seedsplease and @bintangy for giving it a read. THANKS YOU GUYS!
Pairing: Female Deputy x Sharky Boshaw x Jacob Seed
Raiting: E __________________________________________________
At some point Rook's gonna have to choose. To actually speak loud and clear instead of going in roundabout ways whenever they poke and probe at her to figure out what's the deal.
There's no deal to be dealt with as far as Rook concerns. She's perfectly happy the way things are, foraying into the Vet's Center whenever she feels like it, to be completely wrecked by Jacob, in that weird and unusually comfortable dynamic of two people joined by the fray ends of their own needs. Inches away from warm intimacy.
And that makes the other end of her unsought arrangement, very complicated. Toeing the line of dangerous if she can judge by Jacob’s face every time she leaves him. But Sharky. Rook can say without the sliver of a doubt there’s something going on between them that surpasses the fucking. He gets her. And for what she knows, that’s something that’s always considerably underrated.
Damn choices. That’s always been the thorn on Rook's side. The reason why she ended up taking home Bugger and Whiskers when she finally decided she wanted a pet. A pet. But when the puppy had wiggle that little tail of his, she didn’t even think it twice.
And five years into the future, is the same thing all over again. Rook can’t keep waltzing around tacit and implied statements. Especially because now she has a pretty good idea of what she wants, an idea that had jackhammered its way into her brain since the last time she visited the Marina looking for Addie’s advice. But it seems ludicrous, because they both are as immiscible as water and oil.
“You leaving already?”
Jacob sits on the flat cot they spend their nights in whenever she decides she misses him. One rough hand sits at the small of her back and Rook can’t stop a broken sigh from escaping her. Those few steps to the door are always the hardest.
“Yeah, have to catch up on a lot of things.”
“Already late to burn down half the County huh?” He scoots closer, burying his face and what’s probably post-orgasm induced affection in the crook of her neck. Rook bites her lip trying to saddle her thumping heart, because it tastes too much like the real deal.
“I think John misses me already,” she says with a smirk, leaning to kiss him softly, catching a half-grunt from Jacob on her mouth. “Don’t want him to feel left out, you know how he’s like.”
She scrambles off the bed, picking up her discarded clothes, feeling his eyes taking in the tiniest detail of her. He’s counting her bruises and marks, she knows, trying to determine which are his and which are-- well, not. He’s too good of a huntsman to not read the signs.
Why hasn’t he snapped her neck until now? She has no clue. A lot of restraint perhaps. And a good amount of good ole feelings. She’s willing to jackknife into the belief he has them all.
“When are you coming back?”
There’s longing grating in the low pitch of his voice that makes Rook’s breath catch in her throat. Looking back at him is a mistake. She can’t fight those baby blues of his. They always manage to make her weak in the knees.
“I dunno. Two weeks?”
“That’s a long time, Rook," he says, as if he actually cares. Which Rook knows he does.
She clenches her jaw to avoid thinking in the annoying fluttering butterflies in her stomach. “Why? You need me for something?”
“Playing dumb is not your best trait, darling.”
“And speaking your mind, clearly isn’t yours, old man."
He rumbles with laughter, tilting his head back, baring his throat to her. All those powerful muscles tighten like chords, and she stares a bit at the long expanse of his neck wanting to dive back into bed and just hold him and be held by him. But Sharky is also waiting and she feels torn.
Rook sighs.
"Why are you doing this?" Jacob finally asks, glancing at her with a frown.
"Doing what?" She wants to sound nonchalant as she balances on one leg while putting on her jeans. Rook isn't sure she wants to see everything they have go southways. What is exactly gonna happen once the bubble of unsaid words ripple off her mouth.
"You know damn well what," Jacob pokes again.
"Scout’s word, I don't."
"Jesus fuck, Rook, you're infuriating."
Jacob snaps with the brewed frustration of weeks of unanswered silence but Rook refuses to bend her knee. She doesn't want to see her world shifting into something bleak if he's not around.
So she stalls. "And now you're starting to sound like John."
"Not funny,” he grouses.  
"Yeah, I don't know what's the thing going on between you and him, but you guys need to talk it out before Joseph forces you both to do it."
She sees a mash-up of emotions on his face, and a deadly stare, Jacob Seed's specialty. And she gives up.
Rook flops at his side, shoulders hunched. "Fine, fine! What do you wanna know?"
Jacob grabs her chin and tilts her head up until the only thing she sees is him. Which is always a sight. "Stop playing games and tell me why you keep coming back to me."
"I um, I just- I really like the cold," she babbles, "and the whole Jack London aesthetic you have going here, like I really dig that-"
"Rook."
"And you have cute dogs-"
"Rook."
She rolls her eyes at the whispered command to mow down her bullshit, but braces to spill the anxiety off her chest.
"Okay, fine. I like you, okay?" Rook sighs at her own confession, not wanting to stop, because if she does there's not a certified chance she'll finish. "You ain't as bad as you think you are, in fact, you're fucking amazing and every time I go I just wanna go back the moment I’m pass the fences but--”
“But what?”
“Do you really want me to say it?” She's in pain, absolutely fucking unnecessary pain.
“Yeah.”
“I can’t leave him.”
His fingers squeeze her arms, just so and his face goes dark. She sees the tense line of his jaw spasming under the pressure of gritted teeth. “What do you want me to do about it?”
“I don’t know Jacob, okay?" Rook's angry. Hurt and upset, and a million more things that spike up too fast and recede after, so she can't name them. "Look, I never lied to you, we never said this was an exclusive kinda thing, and honestly? If you want me to go and never come back, if you want to, I don’t know-- kick me out of your life, then you gotta say it, ‘cause otherwise--”
She stops because the thought is just venom. She can't live without him, not after everything she already gave up in her life. For once, just once she doesn't want to renounce something.
“What if I want this to be exclusive?” Jacob says, far more calmed than she expected. But it's just an act, 'cause his shoulders are slumped and there's a waver in his voice totally alien for him.
“And why would you want that?”
“I thought Deputies were smart, perhaps I was wrong," he quips, wrapping his hand around her neck and pulling her in, until her forehead rests against his.
“Cut the crap, Jacob," she hisses.
“I love you Rook.”
Her throat is dry, and the kiss that follows sweeps coherence and preformed ideas aside. It feels right. Like home. But the hollow that it's always there when she just has one and not both, weights more.
“I can’t do it, I--" she says, tongue tripping over her teeth and words that are not enough." I really like--, fuck, I really love you, but I can’t."
“You know I could just kill him right?”
Rook laughs to dissipate the terrifying image because he could. Probably very easily. “Yeah, but you won’t. You ain’t like that Jacob," she says to reassure herself, as he clutches to the sides of her flannel with a white-knuckle grip.
“Then what you want from me?” He says with a lilt that sounds heartbreakingly close to a plea.
A prickly wave of heat rushes up, settling on her cheeks, pushing the words out of her throat and into a sputtered mess. “A threesome." Jacob doesn't move or make any sign to acknowledge her statement. Rooks blinks in utter confusion until she sees a pale tint under the scarring and grooves of his face. “Just to see how it goes, how we work together-” She hurriedly adds.
“I think some beers over some grilled meat would work better for it, sweetheart-” Jacob says, and the fact that he's speaking and not throwing her out St. Francis is good enough of a sign. He cups her cheek and Rooks heaves a soft breath of relief.
“I know, I know, but hear me out okay?", she says, clasping her eyes shut, bringing his rough fingers to her lips, "I love you Jacob, but I’m tired to keep my life split, hiding things I shouldn't be hiding. I want you both and that’s non negotiable.”
Through the cracks of the old windows, the wind howls, batting the threadbare curtains, a perfect set up for the anticipation boiling in Rook’s blood.
“Shit, I must be outta my fucking mind,” he says.
------------------------------
“What we doing here, shorty?”
Convincing Sharky is surprisingly more difficult than convincing Jacob. He huffs and kicks at the base of his old couch, killing the old and probably moldy thing for good. It takes her at least two hours to drill the idea into his thick skull, just to realize that he’s just afraid. And the words pour out unbidden. She’ll leave him because, he ain’t worth the trouble. Which is silly, and she tells him so.
The pick up truck stops just outside the fences of St. Francis.
“Remember what we talked about?” She says, eyeing his hands clasping the buttstock of his shotgun as she struggles out the truck. Rook’s counting her breaths, trying to steady herself, and don’t let the spark of fear of the unknown tumble off the decision she just made.   
“Yeah, but-- Are we picking up a judge to go or what?”
“What?”
She makes her way into the old building followed by a Sharky-on-edge. At the entrance Rooks nods at a waving Peggie. “Hi, Miss Rook, brother Jacob is waiting for you in his office.” The man is all sunny smiles and bright nonchalance which is weird and just hammers Rook in the head at how off this is.
Sharky scoffs at her side. “Miss Rook? Dep, how often--”
He freezes mid step.
“C’mon, Shark.”
“Wait, wait, wait,” he almost yelps, “I thought--”
“Not here!”
She sees it in his face. He’s about to splutter his concocted half conclusions that will hold a good amount of info of what she does and how she fucks in her free time and that’s certainly something she doesn’t want the Peggies to find out. Not anyone for that matter.
Rook pulls him by the sleeve until they are in a secluded corridor, just around the corner of Jacob’s office that doubles as bedroom. “Now, spill it.”
Sharky’s eyes glint between confused blinks. “I thought-- Uh, I thought you meant John.”
“What? Why?” It comes off as squeak more suiting in a toddler’s toy than in a grown ass woman.
“I dunno, you've seen him,” Sharky shrugs, “he's fuckin loaded and suave and y’know, all those things chicks dig, and uh, you kept talking ‘bout a dude who tickled your fancy and I dunno Dep, I just-- I thought it was the psychotic fuckface."
She skips over, a little overeager. "Well, it's not, does that change anything?"
Sharky chuckles and leans, chasing her nearness. "Fuck, Dep, you sure know how to pick ‘em.”
Rook wraps her arms around him, pushing herself up on her toes to plant her lips on his. "I sure do." He rolls his hips grinding against her, always ready, and at half mast if the bulge rubbing on her thigh is what she thinks it is.
A door creaks nearby and common sense wedges in, so she pushes Sharky away, not too bluntly she hopes, because this is not how she wants Jacob to find out.
Just in time.
"I was wondering where you were," he says, voice sizzling with something Rook can't quite place. “My guards said you checked in the complex five minutes ago.” His gaze slides off Sharky and onto the wall as if he was nothing more than a blemish on the paint.
"Yeah, I uh-- got lost."
Jacob raises an eyebrow. "Come ere, sweetheart.”
They reach the door of his lair and Rook swallows an impatient huff.
“Get in and let's set this before I'll change my mind,” Jacob looks past her shoulder, “and send your Drubman lap dog packing, he can wait with my guards at the entrance.”
“Uh, I'm a Boshaw, not a Drubman, dude.”
‘Big difference.” Jacob folds his arms across his chest.  “Now kitten, send him off.”
“Yeah, uh, I--” Rook clears her throat, “I can't do that, Jake.”
She feels Sharky's arm slinging around her waist, and sees Jacob’s face distorting into the most absolutely perfect depiction of someone who’s about to have a stroke.
“You okay?”
His eyes narrow and for a moment Rook thinks he’s gonna pounce on Sharky like one of his judges.
The tight line on his jaw snaps. “Fuck, I just lost a few hundred bucks,” he bristles, shattering the heavy silence.
He turns on his heels and steps off the way signaling them to get in. Rook is greeted by a newly bought, expensive-looking bed replacing his old one.
“I told John to buy it for me, and now I can’t make him pay for it.” Jacob answers to the nonexistent question, sitting at the edge of the bed. “Fuck, darling, I thought you were talking about John.”
“What?”
“See, Dep?--” Sharky chirps, turning to Jacob to pat him on the shoulder completely unaffected by the deadly stare, “you and I are in the same frequency, amigo.”
Rook chooses a spot just next to him to flop down, nudging him on the shoulder. “Yeah, well, I was not.”
“No kidding.” He doesn’t laugh but the smirk on his face breaks some of the tension lingering in the air.
Sharky takes it as a cue to collapse next to her. “Now, excuse me if I’m outta line--”
“You are,” Jacob says.
“-- but I ain’t waiting for you to figure out your brotherly issues standing up like some mouth-breathing peggie, no offense man, my legs are killin’ me and I-- uh, wow, this is soft,” he says bouncing a little, “like real quality you have here, Jacob, can I call you Jacob?”
“No.”
“Anyway, I was just sayin’ we need some booze.”
“I thought you were incapable of saying something smart, Boshaw, but you’re right.”
“No. We’re doing this sober or I’m done here.”
They both shrink at her sides.
“Doesn’t matter, it’s like-- like I’m wasted already,” Sharky gruffs.
“You got it right,” Jacob scoffs.
Rook can almost feel the silence, thick, sagging her shoulders and tries to think on how to actually turn words into action. Jacob's thigh presses against hers and Sharky's arm brushes her own. Up until now she'd never realized how fucking warm they both are, like human furnaces melting her little by little. Her jacket feels constricting.
She's definitely not ready for Sharky taking off his pants in one swift move and jumping on the bed. "'Aight, let's do this," he says with the violent twang of an 80's action movie which effectively kills the pretense they're not there to fuck.
Rook can't do another thing than grunt.
“How do you wanna do this, sweetheart?" Jacob sighs, while his hand brushes her thigh up and down.
"I just--" She swallows a hard gulp while a jolt careens down her spine. "I want you both-- In me." Rook shudders hearing her own shaky, definitely harsh demand. Sharky sits at her side again, taking her jacket off and tossing it over a nearby table.
Jacob kisses her then, tongue darting into her mouth until the whole awkward angle of the situation gets swiped by his closeness. It's soft, sensual, thick with want, and a hint of despair. She doesn't have time to worry about Sharky, because he's already tracing the line of her jaw with chapped lips. A hand skitters down her shirt, rolling a stiff nipple and the room echoes her keening mewl. They're testing her, vying for her responses, while she's falling apart.
Air gets puffed out of her lungs in moans and small whimpers that are certainly not dignified, as she flexes her arms to hold onto something. Jacob’s shoulders, Sharky’s chest, she's not sure. Her body is already responding to the unspoken ideas, soaking her underwear, enough to know she's dripping on whatever is beneath her, two sets of hands wandering, when she's used to one. It already feels like it's too much when is not near enough. And they grope, and fondle, while their mouths nip and lick until they leave her bare, pulsing and wanton. Her clothes are off in swift and hungry movements that have her heart hammering against her ribcage.
Sharky’s fingers prod at her entrance, while Jacob’s rough, big hands clasp her thighs pulling them apart. Rook fights to keep her eyes open, glazed with a fog of need, just to be met with pupils blown wide by lust.  
Sharky soon pushes two fingers inside her and she arches into Jacob's chest with a short gasp and a really tacky buck of her hips forward. So eager that’s just embarrassing.
"Easy, Boshaw," Jacob warns, voice edge sharper than the blade of his knife.
"Dude, I know what I'm doing."
And he does, damn if she knows. His fingers curl and his thrusts are slow, deliberately scissoring to prepare her for more. For which one of them, she still doesn't know nor cares.
Rook's head spins when Jacob's questioning fingers reach her slit, brushing where Sharky is sliding in and out until he adds one. Her breath comes out in stuttered gasps at the sensation of her walls struggling to accommodating them both.  
"I--I..." Words dissolve in a flow of saliva, body jerking under the uncoordinated assault.
"Yes?" Jacob says, licking her ear.
"I can't-- I just-- need--"
"We know, shorty, we're gonna take care of you."
Their fingers are gone in the blink of an eye, and Rook clenches painfully around thin air, biting her own lip.
"Come 'ere."
Is Jacob who pulls her over him, easily, so easily she whimpers a little at the manhandling. Her own slick drips down her thighs, sodding the fabric of his pants. Soon she's clambered over his lap, naked and flushed and sweating.
"Relax, doll," Sharky breathes against her neck, kneeled down behind her and very much naked for what Rook can feel against her ass.  
When did it happen?
Sharky ruts forward, cock nestling between her asscheeks, flaring goosebumps all over her. Rook feels the urge to palm at her clit to find some release but she falls forward, pressing palms flat over Jacob’s chest, thanking he still has his shirt on so she can clutch at it as if her life depended on it.
“Nice and easy, kitten,” he rasps pulling out his cock, already leaking and swollen and just perfect as she remembers. His jeans scrap at her inner thighs as she tries to balance to keep her legs apart, bracketing his hips. She doesn’t wanna know, doesn’t wanna think about what his brothers would do to Sharky and her if they find out. She doesn’t even know if she’s in the liberty to scream her lungs off, as she is positively sure she will in a few minutes.
Sharky places a wet kiss on the nape of her neck just then, making her shiver. “Just breath, babe.”
Jacob smirks underneath her, clasping her hips and eases her down on his lap until she’s fully seated on the cradle of his hips. She fights a moan at the hard stretch, rolling her hips to try to adjust at the intrusion.
“All good?” Jacob groans, running his palm up,cupping her breast, and she mumbles a ‘fuck, yes’, as if her breath wasn’t coming in hitching gusts or her thighs weren’t quivering at his sides. He feels so good inside her, and she rises to her knees just to flop back down, stealing a deep moan from him.
“You feel so good, sweetness, so damn good.”
Still, he doesn’t move and it’s driving her up the wall, even if right now she’s completely lost to the point she can’t count to ten.
“Are you ready for me, babe?” Sharky says to her temple.
Rook nods. It’s the only thing that she seems to be doing since this whole thing began. They’re gonna split her apart and fuck if she’s not eager to be used, and be full and fucking satisfied.
One moment later there’s a good amount of lube on Sharky’s fingers, as he slips them inside her ass. Jacob pushes upwards just when Sharky stretches her open, and it’s enough to drag whines from the back of her throat she’s completely unable to bridle in.
“Can I?” Sharky finally asks.
She chokes on a sob at the loss of his fingers. “Yeah, please-- just, please.”
The fact that Jacob has gone still, tells her they’re really trying to, despite whatever misplaced sense of possession they have about her.
The tip of Sharky’s cock press against her ass and she almost goes cross-eyed once he’s inside her to the hilt.
“Fuck.” She scratches at the broad expanse of Jacob’s chest, slamming her eyes shut. “Shitfuck-shit-”
The sensation almost makes her believe her spine will tear in half, but the dull pain of the first thrust is gone in seconds, replaced by a jolt of pleasure that jumbles her brains. They’d done this before, but never like this, when she’s sure the heavy press of their cocks inside is the perfect definition of stuffed.
“Keep forgetting how tight you are, shorty,” Sharky pants on her neck, one hand splayed on her lower back, the other just above one of Jacob’s, trying as he might to balance behind her. “All good?”
“Should we stop?” Jacob asks, and Rook can’t but be amazed at his restraint as she feels him throbbing inside her.
“No-- please, don’t. I want it, fuck--”
She rolls her hips with heightened senses, and just then they push inside her, completely out of sync, completely out of whatever shred of grounding reality they all were grasping until now. Is not something she was expecting, the perfect, astounding fullness that makes her want more, and move, buck up and down, and back again, hips out of her damn control.
“Slow down, babe, or this is gonna be a helluva short trip,” Sharky moans, gripping her chin and tilting her head to the side so he can kiss her. A kiss that soon becomes an exchange of broken gasps that she has too soon to let go to catch her breath.
The slick slide of their cocks along her walls is slowly propeling her to the edge, and she hears herself beg for more, faster, deeper with a stark voice of sheer need.
“So greedy, darling, you think you can take it all?”
She’d answer if she remembered how to speak so she grunts in acquiescing.
Jacob’s arms snuck around her waist, bringing her closer to catch her lips in a stifling kiss, all teeth and tongue and the sweet taste of what’s right. This right here.
The broken rhythm soon establishes as a constant wave, a heartbeat that guides every pounding and sink, and she manages to find some leverage to play her own tricks. And then it’s her the one fucking them deep, harsh and quickly, even if her knees ache and she’s not sure if she will be able to walk tomorrow. Or the day after. But their moans and whines are good enough of a fuel until her legs ache and she can’t take it anymore.
They’re all rough pants and moans, not letting her do what she wants, determined to make her come apart on their cocks, before they fill her up. She can’t keep track of every move and drag, vaguely registering how deep they’re sinking, Sharky yanking her back so he can lick and kiss every spot he can reach.
A hand sneaks down and presses a flat thumb to her clit, but she’s too far lost on the their cocks pushing hard and hitting every right spot inside her to even notice to whom it belongs to. The pleasure burns close to scorching her, so overwhelming she doesn’t realize she’s sobbing. Her arms now gripping Jacob’s biceps feel weak, just when the waves of her orgasm start crashing against her. She trips over the edge with a special hard press of Jacob’s dick, just when Sharky decides to give deep roll of his hips and every muscle tight and on fire, and everything around her peters out into sparks of white as she comes, harder than ever before.
“Oh shit,” Sharky moans in her hair, as his hips slap against her ass, speed faltering.
Jacob’s movements lose momentum for a second, as she feels his cock practically sodden with her release. “Fuck.”
They guide her through her peak and undoing, as she finally falls slack over Jacob’s shoulder, silently and thoroughly enjoying every pound and harsh thrust. She considers fighting back for a second, to move and buck against them but her legs are of no use, and she whines as they chase their own releases, making her body jerk as they use her for their own pleasure.
Jacob comes first with the familiar growl, amplified a hundred times over, stilling after a deep push and she knows, she positively feels her insides painted with his thick cum. His baby blues stand out against his reddened cheeks, lips parted to regain his breath and Rook kisses him again.
Sharky’s push, rough and off any rhythm, slams her down on Jacob’s chest until there’s a part sob-part grunt bouncing on the room before his hips go flush against her ass, until he finally slides out and she feels his come dripping out her rear.  
“Whoa.” It’s an exclamation that comes between ragged breaths from Sharky’s part and she sees it mirrored in Jacob’s eyes. She’s a mess. An utter, sweaty, satisfied mess and she loves it.
The bed is big enough they can all fit without smashing each other’s essential bits and once the heat has considerably tuned down, she pulls the covers over them.  
“You know Jacob? I was lying,” she says, as she turns on her side to face him, her hand drawing circles on Sharky’s hip, “I hate the cold.”
Jacob chuckles, staring at the ceiling and maneuvering beneath the covers to kick off his jeans. “Yeah well, I think we can make something to correct that, darling.”
Rook turns to kiss Sharky, just to turn to Jacob after it. “Thanks-- seriously, to both of you.”
“It was good.” Jacob grins. Not just at her. Looking behind her.
Rook is a hundred percent ecstatic.
“Yeah, within my top five-- no, top three experiences.”
They finally share a laugh that pulls at Rook’s heart, filling it with searing bliss as the two men she loves, share a bed, sandwiching her in the most perfect way.
“Hey, Jake-man, uh, y’know I’ve been thinking.” Sharky turns to look directly at Jacob, slinging an arm over Rook’s hip.
“About?”
“I think-- I think I know how to make John pay for the bed if you wanna--”
Jacob’s face shifts in a shit eating grin. “I’ll let you restock from my armory, if you can pull it off.”
“Deal.”
Rook feels herself growing tired, exhausted, every joint and muscle screaming and her brain slowly fading into sleep. “So-- can we do this again?”
She knows she has no right of asking more of them. Not when they’re just crossing the line of acquaintances to acquaintances that fuck the same woman, but she hopes.
“Sure, why not?” Sharky mumbles, already sprawled on his side of the bed.
Rook turns to Jacob, with what she thinks are her best pleading eyes.
He blows air hard, brows pulling closer in what seems a deep furrow and her stomach sinks.
“Maybe.” He smirks.
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emeraldwaves · 5 years
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Title:  By Virtue We Fall For @lexyanimecircus Pairing:  Kacchako Rating: M Word Count: 11,124 Read on Ao3 Summary: 
Bakugou Katsuki is a guardian angel, watching over humans who remain on Earth below. When Uraraka Ochako shows up, she becomes his new apprentice and Bakugou begins to feel things that he believed to be long dead.
Thank you to @amaisenshi @miqitten @supereveylg and @youaremynewdream for helping me out with this fic!!!
"Uraraka Ochako," he flips through her file before slowly lowering it to see her obnoxious, shining face.
"That's me!" she says, pointing to herself. "I think..." She glances down, her brown eyes darting from side to side, her brow furrowing in confusion. "I-I mean it sounded familiar."
"It's frickin' you. Stop making such a stupid face."
This is the worst part. Bakugou hates when they first get here and don't remember who they are or why they're here. The girl in front of him stands, hands claps together, eyes glistening with confusion. She's got on a small pink summer dress, the bodice hugging her curves and spreading out around her hips. She's probably the cutest guardian they've got.
He sighs and slams the file shut. "Let's go, dipcrap."
"Dipcrap?" She tilts her head, glancing around the pure white room. "Uhm... you still haven't told me where we are." She rubs the back of her neck. "Sorry, I think I'm a little confused. Are you... some sort of bird person?"
This always happens when they die unexpectedly.
Groaning, Bakugou turns around, flicking his wings back and forth. "You're dead. I'm taking you to get your wings."
He prays this one doesn't freak the flip out. Admittedly, it's a little daunting; no memories, no knowledge of how it happened, and suddenly they're in this stark white room, wondering why someone is holding a file for them like they're at a job interview.
It would probably be better if they had someone more nurturing greeting them, but Toshi put Bakugou on the welcome committee today and here he is, greeting Uraraka Ochako, the latest addition to their guardian angel team.
This really is his least favorite part of the job.
She swallows, looking down at her hands. "I'm... dead?" she whispers.
"Yeah, welcome to the darn club," he says, his wings fluttering behind his back.
"I don't... I don't understand..." Her body is trembling, water welling up in her brown round eyes. Bakugou feels a twinge of guilt. This girl is actually kind of... cute... and she's young... like he was. "What happened?"
Bakugou sighs. "I can't tell you that."
It's all in her file, written out as plain as day. She died saving her best friend, pushing him out of the way when a drunk driver came crashing through the window of the cafe. The two had been sat by the window and she took the brunt of the hit.
But she can't know that.
"What?" she blinks. "Why?!"
"There's a reason you don't have your memories, idiot," he scoffs, clicking his tongue.
"What's the reason?" she asks, finally stepping forward.
"C'mon," he grumbles. "When you get your gosh darn wings you'll know."
She pouts, her cheeks puffing out a bit. "And here I thought people in heaven would be nice."
Bakugou snorts, shoving his hands into his pocket. "Can you get a firetruckin' move on?"
"Firetrucking?" she asks, tilting her head again.
Alright. He's annoyed. She asks way to many gosh darn questions.
"It's heaven," he growls. "No matter how hard I try, I can't swear." He knows he should've given up swearing ages ago, since it's not effective. But he keeps doing it, hopeful for the one day the oh holy editor slips up and let's him say something profane.
"Pfft!" Uraraka snorts, and suddenly bursts out laughing. "Holy poops! Gosh darnit! FORK!" she gasps. "Oh my gosh you really can't." Laughter erupts from her again, her whole body shaking as she tests out the words.
"No, you really can't. Trust me, after decades I think I would forking know," he grumbles. "Can you hurry it up?"
She frowns again, placing her hands on her hips. "Excuse me for being confused that I died outta nowhere!"
"Let's. Go. Wings. Now."
She blinks, and glances at her back. "Wings? Like angel wings? Like you?"
"Yeah like angel wings. Let's go," he growls, stomping towards the exit of the white office. He swings it open, leading her up a path of fluffy, white clouds. She needs to get checked in and explained the rules by people who are way better at this than he is.
"Wow," she breathes. "Heaven is so... soft!" A small giggle slips from her lips, and he glances behind him. With each step she takes, her short brown hair bounces with her step. Her eyes are scanning everything, taking in all the sights, but he sees the sadness in them.
To a point, he gets it. None of them know how they died; it's just a fact, accepted, and then they all move on.
He climbs up the cloud steps, making his way into the tall, golden building where they all meet. The doors are a golden gate and he pushes them open no problem, waiting for her to walk through.
She pauses, freezing for a moment. "If... I walk through there... that means I... I really am dead right?"
"You were dead the second you got here, Cheeks," he states bluntly.
She frowns. "Are you like this to every person who dies?!"
"Yup."
"Who are you anyway?" she asks, storming by him, though with the ground as fluffy as it is, it doesn't make much of an impact.
"Bakugou Katsuki. Guardian angel. I'm the best gosh darn one there is."
"You?" she points. "You're the best there is?! You don't act very guardian like."
"’Cause being on the welcome committee stinks," he grumbles, shutting the gates behind them once she finally steps through.
The building is one long hallway, with doors lining the side. At the end of the hallway sits a giant golden throne, completely empty. A rainbow trails over it, clouds lining the side. The entire room glitters, glistening against the light blue sky which shines through the glass pane ceiling.
"Wow," she breathes. "Heaven is kind of beautiful."
"It gets old," Bakugou scoffs.
She frowns again. "How long have you been here exactly?"
"Centuries? I don't forking know."
"I see..." she whispers.
He sighs, knowing he has to explain this crap to her, which stinks because he could be doing literally anything else right now.
"This is central heaven. When people die, they are brought here by their angel guide and led to the branch of heaven they belong in. Each door takes you to a different branch," he explains, grumbling through his teeth.
"Are all angel guides as grouchy as you?" she asks, folding her arms over her chest.
"Whatever." He continues down the hall, ready to lead her to their branch. Soon, he can hand her off to Kaminari and Toshi and he can get back to his actual darn job.
"So what are all the various branches?" she asks, still glancing around. "You haven't exactly explained much to me."
"Don't know. Don't care." Bakugou shrugs.
"Wow," she says, rolling her eye. "What a guide you are."
"Look once we get to my boss, you can ask whatever you want, okay?! Just shut up and let me take you there."
"Fine!" she hisses and finally stops talking.
Good. What an idiot. She's a fool if she thinks they don't all want to know how they died. It's a question that has plagued Bakugou for centuries. He wants to know, but he doesn't break the rules. The last thing he wants is to end up in hell.
That would be worse than being a guide for a day.
He swings the door open, leading her inside. In their branch of heaven, angels stand around pools of clouds, peering into them. A few look extremely happy, a few look a little distressed, and all of them are wearing the same thing; a white robe tied around their waist with a golden rope, golden sandals which lace around their ankles, and of course, their large angel wings, pure white and beautiful.
Bakugou follows the path, leading her up to the main castle. It's tall, golden like the central building, spires shooting up into the clouds. "This is where we stay," he says. "You don't have to worry about food, or sleeping, but all meetings are here. If you need breaks you go here, and I'll be handing you off to Kaminari and Toshi."
"Who are they?" she asks, her eyes widen as she takes in the various sights they walk by.
"Toshi is the lead guardian angel, he'll explain all this poop."
She snorts.
"Sorry... still not over the swearing thing." She clears her throat and tries to look serious, but the sadness is still clear in her eyes. He can practically see the questions burning at the edge of her lips.
He gets it.
But he doesn't want to explain it.
He moves them down the hall, taking them to Toshi's office, where he stands with Kaminari. Kaminari has a stack of files in his hand and he looks a little flustered. "Ah! Bakugou!"
"Young Bakugou! Have you brought Uraraka Ochako?" Toshi's voice booms, echoing against the golden walls of his office.
"Yup," he says stepping to the side so the girl can see them.
"Welcome!" Toshi smiles.
"See this is a welcoming committee," Uraraka smirks, her eyes glancing at Bakugou.
"Sorry you got stuck with Baks in the rotation," Kaminari chuckles. "He's the worst."
"Yeah clearly," Uraraka hums.
"Oi! Dip fart! I'm the firetruckin' best!"
"Still with the swears," Kaminari sighs. "Lemme guess, Bakugou here didn't tell you anything."
"Nope!" she smiles, looking towards Bakugou as if she's just gotten him in trouble. "He barely told me a thing! Basically, all I know is my name! I don't even know how I died."
Toshi frowns. "That, Uraraka Ochako, we cannot tell you."
"Why not?"
Kaminari looks down, biting his lip. Of the three of them, he was the closest to understanding why. He is wingless, after all.
"You are a guardian angel," Toshi says softly. "This a special branch of heaven, for those who die saving others in a selfless act. Though we cannot give you anymore specifics. If you were to know how you died, it could send your mind into turmoil. You would search for those close to you and become obsessed with watching them. Even if you say you won't, I can promise you it would happen. You will feel love for those humans alone, and then you will fall."
"We've seen it happen," Kaminari admits.
"Huh... A selfless act... I see..." She glances towards Bakugou, narrowing her eyes for a moment, as if she finds it hard to believe he could've done such a thing. "But what is a guardian angel?"
Toshi smiles. "We are lucky enough to watch over those still on Earth. When they pray, or are going through a desperate time, we bless them with a bit of our grace to assist them."
She stares, looking at them. "That... sounds really wonderful actually!" she smiles, pressing her fingers together.
"I can be very rewarding. But there are a few rules. When you are given your wings you will receive your grace," Toshi explains. "Think of it as your angel life force, you cannot run out, but you will need to take time to replenish it. There are springs of grace water littered throughout our section of heaven to so."
"So we share grace with humans in need then?"
"Yes, those deserving of it. You must understand that you cannot give your grace to a human more than once. You also cannot follow a human for longer than a year in Earth time," he says. "And finally, you may not fall in love with a human. If you do, you will fall."
"Fall? What does that mean? You've mentioned it a few times..." she whispers.
"Lose your wings and go to hell," Bakugou snaps. "Like this idiot."
"H-Hey!" Kaminari blushes. "I-I didn't fall!"
"Close enough!" Bakugou hisses. "We had to go get him back from hell."
"You got him back?"
"Well..." Kaminari bites down on his lip, looking sad. "Apparently I... fell in love with a human. My wings turned black and I fell to hell, but... Toshi knew it was a mistake so he and Bakugou came to get me. I'm okay... I just can't get my wings or grace back. So instead I help here, with organizing!"
"Kaminari did not deserve to be punished. What happened to him was my fault..." Toshi whispers. "If you ever feel memories from your life coming back. Please come talk to me immediately."
Bakugou knew Toshi accidentally did not erase Kaminari's memory properly. He hadn't realized how strong Kaminari's love for Jirou Kyouka was, leaving the blond completely obsessed with watching her.
By the time his wings began to turn black, it had been too late.
"I-I see..." she says.
"It’s scary!" Kaminari blurts out. "I didn’t stay there for very long, and I don’t remember much, but it’s very dark down there. Hot, like fire is burning your skin at all time. You can hear the cries of demons echoing down there and your body feels like it’s constantly in pain!"
Uraraka blinks, staring at Kaminari. "O-Oh."
"Yeah it’s terrible."
Toshi clears his throat, and Kaminari chuckles awkwardly.
"Sorry," he says, rubbing his neck. "I thought it would be good to warn you. Heaven is great though!"
"Well hopefully I get to stay here then," she mutters.
"Just don’t fork up. Others who fall stay down there," Bakugou snorts, ignoring Kaminari. "It stinks. Enji will torture the fart outta you."
"His son is in charge now. After the disaster with the human girl and his mother... Enji gave the throne to him," Toshi explains.
"Ah. Great. Even better," Bakugou hisses. He doesn't like to think about idiot half and half breed Todoroki.
"It could be, but I'd rather not find out," Toshi laughs. "Anyway, Uraraka Ochako, do you understand your role here?"
"I think so," she whispers.
"If you have any questions, my doors are always open," Toshi nods.
"Come on!" Kaminari smiles, waving his hand. "I'll take you to get your grace." The two of them walk down the stairs, chattering away happily. Bakugou is happy to be free of her. Now he can focus on actually sharing grace and maybe having a nice soak later.
"Ah, yes! Young Bakugou, please go with them," Toshi smiles.
"Eh!? Why?" he snorts, slamming her folder on top of Kaminari's pile.
"Because, she is to be your apprentice. I think it's time for another one, don't you?" Toshi smiles. "Kirishima is doing fine on his own now."
Bakugou growls, looking at Uraraka Ochako. Her rosy cheeks look soft, her hair gently brushing against her cheeks as she smiles at Kaminari. "How about no apprentices..." he grumbles.
"Go with them," Toshi chuckles, gently nodding his head towards the exit.
"Yeah, yeah," he grumbles, tugging on his robe. He flaps his wings, following the two of them down the steps to the entrance of Toshi's office. "Let's go, morons,"
"Bakugou? You're coming?" Uraraka blinks.
"Yeah. You're my new apprentice."
"So I'm stuck with you," she frowns.
"Trust me, I'm not happy about it either," he snorts, folding his arms over his chest.
"You guys will be a great team! You should've seen how well Bakugou trained Kirishima!" Kaminari laughs, walking to the back of the castle. He pushes the large doors at the end of the hall open, revealing a large pool. "Welcome to the grace pool!" he says, smiling.
"Wow..." she breathes, immediately rushing over to the large bath. She peers over the water, looking at her own reflection. She pauses, her fingers curling into her dress. "S-Sorry..." she mumbles. "I-I forgot what I looked like."
Kaminari gently places his hand on her shoulder, smiling at her. "Don't worry, we all forgot at one point too, even Bakugou," he smirks.
"Shut it, Sparky."
"Sparky?" Uraraka asks, raising her eyebrow at the two boys.
"There was this one time with lightning... look uh... it's not important. Anyway... your robes are right here," he says, gesturing to the small pile of clothes laid out next to the pool.
"So what do I do?" she asks, turning toward both boys.
"Just get in," Bakugou snorts.
She frowns again, glancing between the two boys. "I prefer it when Kaminari explains."
"Hah," he smirks, "Look who is winning now. "
"You're a forking moron," Bakugou growls.
"Once you get in, the grace will enter your body and you'll grow your wings," Kaminari chuckles.
"Do I... should I change?" she whispers. Her cheeks flush, and Bakugou hates that his own cheeks betray him, blushing too.
"You can, usually we just go in the grace pools naked. It doesn't really matter," Kaminari shrugs.
"I guess you're right," she sighs. "We are... dead."
"Y'know, I like to think of myself as an angel, not dead. It sounds nicer," Kaminari says, nodding.
A small smile pulls across Uraraka's lips and she giggles. "It does sound nicer."
Bakugou wants to point out that Kaminari isn't an angel any longer, but for once Uraraka looks a little calm, the sadness not as prevalent in her eyes. He doesn't want to take that away from her.
"I uhm... Well... don't stare or anything..." she says.
"Don't worry, all those sorts of desires don't really exist here," Kaminari laughs.
She nods. Her fingers gently glide across her skin, pushing her dress down over her shoulders, letting it fall to the floor.
She has her back turned to them, and Bakugou's eyes trail over her body. The curve of her back dips just above her round, cute bottom; cuter than her cheeks even. Bakugou has seen everyone here without their clothes on and has never been affected by it. They're technically not supposed to be.
But Uraraka Ochako is breaking him apparently.
She steps her foot forward, closing her eyes as it touches the water, as though she expects it to be cold. Bakugou knows how warm it is, the feeling always enveloping his body in a warmth he never experienced before this.
"O-Oh..." she says softly, slowly walking down the steps. The water ripples around her body, her arms hugged around her body as she slowly lowers herself into it, the tips of her hair growing wet. She gasps, the warm rush entering her. "Ngh..." Her back arches up as white wings sprout from her back, flapping out behind her. Droplets of water shimmer gold, dropping around her body. Her breasts gently bounce against her chest, a gentle sigh leaving her lips as the water trickles down her neck.
Her eyes are shut, her hands clutched against her chest as she leans her head back. Her body glows golden, the grace entering her. Gently, the wings curl down against her body and she lets out a long sigh.
"It's really warm," she says.
"Yeah, yeah..." Bakugou whispers and rubs his forehead. He's not supposed to be affected by her, but as she steps out of the pool, her body immediately dry again. He can't help but think she's the most beautiful being he's ever laid eyes upon. A true angel, the actual definition.
She pulls on the robes, tying the golden rope around her waist and slipping the sandals on, smiling at the two boys. "Is that it?"
"Let's go," Bakugou grunts.
~~
"So this is an cloud pool?" Uraraka blinks, her white wings flapping ever so slightly. She peers down into the pool, her eyes widened as she does, as if she's trying to figure out how it works.
"Yeah, idiot. What else would it be?"
She frowns again. "I miss Kaminari."
"Don't miss that idiot," Bakugou scoffs.
"At least he's nice!" she mumbles, rolling her eyes. "Were you this rude with your last apprentice?"
"Yeah! He was," A new voice cuts through the clouds, as a red headed angel trots up to them, a smile wide on his face. "That's just how Baks is," Kirishima smirks, slinging his arm around his neck.
"Get off of me, dipcrap!" Bakugou mutters, shoving him away.
"Hey there," he says, stumbling back as he holds his hand out to Uraraka. "I'm Kirishima. I was Bakugou's last apprentice."
"Well," she giggles. "I'm glad to see you're still alive-" She pauses, glancing down at the cloud. "Or... still here I guess..." she mumbles.
"Don't worry, don't worry!" he chuckles, gently touching her shoulder. "You get used to it I swear."
"Y-Yeah!" she says softly.
"What's he showing you? How to view humans? It's cool, you can watch everything they do- uh... I don't mean that in a weird way or anything..."
Uraraka giggles, her cheeks flushing a bit. Bakugou firetrucking hates when she does that. "I get it," she says. "I mean, it's kind of our job to watch over them, isn't it?"
"Man," Kirishima sighs. "You're gonna be a way better guardian angel than me."
"Can you get out of here? I'm trying to forking teach her! I got a lot of poop to get done today."
Uraraka snorts again. "I-I'm sorry I can't believe you just said poop."
"Are you a child?" Bakugou hisses, glaring at her. Even with his death glare, she's still laughing, looking so darn cute when she does.
"I-I'm not the one who just said poop!"
"But I'm not laughing at it, idiot!"
"See, you guys will be great!" Kirishima smirks, nudging Bakugou's shoulder. He jumps back when Bakugou sends his glare in Kirishima's direction. "Okay, okay!" he says. "I gotta check on my humans anyway. See you for a soak later! Nice to meet you Uraraka!"
"Bye! Nice to meet you Kirishima!" she waves and wipes her eye, still laughing a little. "Okay... I'm focused I swear!"
She turns her gaze to the small pool and Bakugou sighs, swiping his hand across the pool of water in the small cloud. A human pops up, sitting in her living room. She’s on couch, one knee pulled up to her chest. Her long blue hair curls around her waist, and she’s thumbing at the button on the T.V remote, though it didn't seem to be on.
"This is a human I'm following. She lost her job last week, and her dog recently died. Her two best friends just started dating. It's a lame problem, but she's feeling left out and crap. So I'm going to give her some grace in the next few days if she doesn't seem better."
"You mean you don't give it right away?"
"No," Bakugou snorts. "Humans gotta try and work for this crap. We observe for a month or so and then we give them our grace."
"I see..."
"Don't talk to them, don't ever interact with them. You're not able to go to Earth anyway. Some of us can, but that's after decades of us being here and only when the situation is very dire. We want to prevent humans from ending up as soul guides."
"Soul guides?" she asks.
"Reapers. People who guide the souls up to heaven. One of them brought you here. They can't interact with you though."
"How do you have to die to become that?" she asks, her brown gaze fixated on the woman in front of her.
"Suicide," he says bluntly.
"I see..." she whispers, not wanting him to elaborate. "So... everyone in this branch died saving someone."
"Yup," he says, staring at the pool, not looking at her. The girl on the couch hasn't moved, balancing the remote on her leg.
"Even you?" she smirks.
"I guess so," he growls. Whatever poor extra he saved, he prayed they lived a full gosh darn life or else it would've been a huge waste. He knows he'll never know.
"I know I'm teasing you, but it's actually not that hard to believe," she says softly, reaching forward to place her hand over his. "You brought me here, and you're training me. You also went after Kaminari when he fell. I don't know much about all this but... you probably have helped so many people on Earth too. I can't imagine you're a bad person. You'd be in hell if you were, right?"
He turns away from her, clicking his tongue. He can't get attached to her. They're not supposed to feel anything. Of course, there are no rules against angels loving other angels. But it never happens. It's an abnormality. "You try the pool," he says.
"R-Right!" She nods, pulling her hand back as she waves it over the pool, a new human popping up. This man has his hoodie up, pulled over his wild purple hair as he walks through the busy streets, rain pelting his jacket. "Is... this one mine?" she says.
"Yeah. The grace which comes out of your hand finds the people it thinks needs it. Once you are connected like this you can call upon them yourself, but the pool will find a new person on it's own when you start over," he explains.
"I see."
"Think you got it?" he raises his eyebrow.
"Y-Yeah..." she says, watching the figure continue down the street in the rain. "So when do I know to give him grace."
"Keep an eye on him and update me with everything you see," Bakugou says. "It'll come naturally eventually."
"Okay," she says, her wings fluttering a bit.
"I'll leave you to it."
"W-Wait! B-Bakugou..." she calls after him and he stare at her waiting for her to speak. "So can I come find you if I have more questions?"
"Whatever," he shrugs.
"Thank you," she says, bowing her head.
She's way too polite for his liking.
~~
"So the new girl," Kirishima says, nudging him a few days later. The two are soaking in a grace pool, Bakugou leaning over the edge, letting his wings spread.
Bakugou wishes she would stop following him around everywhere. Everytime he sees her his stomach does this weird flutter thing he can't stand. She makes him feel and he forking hates that.
"What about her?"
"You guys seem close."
"We're not."
"Aw c'mon man! She seems nice. You could use some more friends around here."
Not a friend like her. She's dangerous. "No."
"Where is she today, anyway?" Kirishima asks. "I haven't seen her."
"Good," Bakugou mutters. He tries to deal with her as little as possible, but she always has weird questions about humans or wants to talk about her human. Whenever he sees her away from him, she's always staring at a cloud pool, with a goofy smile on her face.
She's got determination Bakugou hasn't seen in a long while. Even Kirishima, who was always the picture of happiness and joy didn't share as much determination as she did.
"She's probably looking at a cloud pool with a doofy smile on her darn face," Bakugou snorts, flapping his wings a bit to get excess water off of them.
"I guess she's enjoying it then?" Kirishima asks.
"Yeah," he says. "And don't ask her about her human, she won't stop talking about him."
Kirishima blinks, "Uh oh... are you concerned?"
"No," Bakugou replies, shaking his head as he stands up to get out of the grace pool. He grabs his robe, pulling it onto his arms. "That's just how she is. Eager and poop."
"Right..." Kirishima snorts.
Bakugou leaves Kirishima to soak on his own. He needs to check on his human. He just recently gave Nejire Hadou grace and now she's a bubbling bowl of joy all the darn time. Annoying, but good. It's better than watching her sit on the couch doing nothing all day. Depression is a witch.
"Bakugou!" Her clear voice pulls him from his thoughts and he immediately turns to see Uraraka, waving to him by her cloud pool. "I-I think I need help!" she says and her white wings flutter behind her nervously.
He sighs, rubbing his neck as he steps onto her cloud, peering down into her pool. Shinsou Hitoshi is rummaging through his cabinets, looking exhausted.
"What?" he asks, raising his eyebrow at her.
"I-I think I should give him grace. It's been almost a month and he still... just looks like this," she says. "I don't think I've seen him smile once."
A sad look crosses her eyes and Bakugou wonders if she's almost too sensitive for this kinda crap. Either way, she's right; this Shinsou guy needs grace.
"Alright," he says and reaches out to grab her wrist. Her skin is oddly warm, and her cheeks flush when he wraps his fingers around her skin. He doesn't want to let go. Instead, he swallows, keeping her hand over the cloud pool. "Release the grace here, and it will flow into him. You'll probably need to soak later today."
"Right," she nods.
Reluctantly, he lets go of her hand, watching as it begins to glow. The golden particles dance around and flow into the small pool. She watches as it lights up her face, her cheeks glowing while the energy transfers down to Earth.
The two of them watch as the golden specks slip inside of Shinsou, the man pausing his actions. He frowns for a moment, before a small smile curls at his cheeks.
Uraraka blinks, pulling in a sharp breath of air. "Bakugou!" she giggles. "Did you see?! He smiled!" She grabs his hands and squeezes them. "We did it!"
"Nah Cheeks, this was all you. Watch over him," he snorts, watching as she jumps up and down.
She's perfect, Bakugou decides.
And he hates that.
~~
He sees her sitting on the edge of a cloud, her leg dangling over the edge. Her knee is pulled up close to her chest and she's staring out at the blue sky.
She's lost in thought, and it's the first time he's seen her looking so serious. Normally, she's focused and smiling.
"Oi, Cheeks!" he calls out, taking a seat next to her.
"Ah! B-Bakugou..." she gasps, turning to him, immediately smiling. "How are you?"
"Fine. Why you sitting over here by yourself?"
She shrugs, and reaches down, curling her fingers around the clouds. The white wisps dance across her fingers and she pulls some of the gentle smoke towards her. "I was... just thinking I guess. Sorry, I know we're doing amazing things here. Shinsou is so much happier now!" she says with a smile. "But I guess... I can't help thinking about dying. I wish... I could remember one thing."
"Don't wish for crap like that," he snaps. "You don't want to go to hell."
"No!" she says, waving her hands quickly. "No I don't at all! But it's hard. Don't you ever... wonder?"
He sighs, rubbing at the back of his neck. "Sometimes. It gets old to wonder when you're here for so long."
"I see," she whispers. "So... do you think I'll stop thinking about it?"
"You could stop thinking about it right now," he snorts.
"You make it sound so easy," she frowns, her wings fluttering.
"It is frickin' easy. Boom. Think about somethin' else."
He says this, and yet he knows how impossible it is for him to stop thinking of her.
"Yeah," she sighs. "I'll try it. I guess it's weird to think about all the people down there... how so many of them need help and I never realized it when I was alive. At least... I don't think I did."
"You can't forking change how you were, so just be good now," he snorts and nudges her elbow.
"Yeah I know! I think this makes me feel better. But, sometimes I wish I just had a teeny tiny clue," she says, holding up her fingers to indicate a tiny amount.
He reaches up and presses her fingers together. "Stop that. It's dangerous territory. I swear to gosh. If your forking wings starting changing color, I will kill you."
She sticks her tongue out at him. "You can't kill me. I'm already dead. Firetruckin' idiot," she teases.
His heart flutters. Why the hell is she so darn cute?! It makes his heart feel heavy in his chest with an emotion long since died. "I can't believe you just swore."
"Well, I didn't really. Or did I?" she hums. "You'll never know which one I was saying."
Her lips pull into a smile, he wants to kiss her. He wants to run his fingers over her cheek and caress her skin and hold her and make her his own.
And for the first time in years, Bakugou misses being human.
~~
When he walks by her, her brow is furrowed and her wings are fluttering. She looks nervous, her brown eyes wide as she stares at the cloud pool in front of her.
Something isn't right.
After years of doing this, he can tell.
He stops and flaps his wings back and forth. "Oi... Cheeks!" he calls out, and steps onto her cloud.
"Bakugou!" she gasps, and quickly waves her hand over her cloud pool.
He frowns. She's hiding something. If it was Shinsou she was watching, she would've yammered on about how amazing he was doing now, but no... She was looking at something else.
"Oi..." he growls, leaning towards her. "What were you looking at?"
"Nothing!" she says, pursing her lips, her brown eyes wide.
"You're a poopy liar."
She snorts. Everytime it gets her. "I-I can't tell you. You'll be mad," she admits.
"I'm always forking mad. Try me."
"Okay," she sighs, her wings fluttering nervously. "I uhm... a name... popped into my head. Just a name! Nothing else!" She waves her hands quickly.
"Oi!" He reaches forward, wrapping his hand around her wrist. "You can't be thinking about crap like that!"
"It was just once!" she squeaks. "Midoriya Izuku..." she whispers, brushing her hand over the cloud. "He... seems sad. I just... I thought it was my job-"
"No!" he snaps, glancing down at the pool. The green haired boy does look a bit sad, and Bakugou can guess why.
He remembers the name; Midoriya Izuku, the boy Uraraka Ochako saved before dying.
"Did you not listen when we said you could go to hell!?" he growls, swiping his hand across the cloud, making the image disappear.
"I think I knew him and I-"
"We have to go to Toshi, right now," he snaps.
"But Bakugou I-"
"Shut up!" he snarls, gripping her wrist as he yanks her off of the cloud.
"Stop it! I'll follow you!" she cries out, tears pooling in her brown eyes.
He growls, letting go of her hand. The last thing he wants to do is hurt her, but he also doesn't want to lose her. "Fart," he curses, wishing for once he could say the actual word. "I... I don't want you to forking fall, Cheeks.
Her eyes widen, a few tears slipping down her cheeks, wetting her rosy skin. Even crying like this she looks like a goddess. He knows why she did it... he understands... he just... never wants her to do it again.
She steps forward and presses her face against his chest, wrapping her arms around him. He sucks in a sharp breath, feeling how warm her body is pressed to his. "I promise... I promise I won't do it again," she breathes.
He wonders if she loved Midoriya Izuku. She had to feel something intense for him if she was willing to push him out of the way to save his life. Even still, it doesn't matter. Bakugou and her… they won't be in love, they can't be in love. He needs to let this go. He needs to let her go, but he lets her cry against his chest.
Bakugou swallows. He knows Toshi would want to erase the name from her mind. But she promises and he knows how much she wants one piece of her old life. He can't... bring himself to deny her that.
"Tell no one of this," he growls, gripping her shoulders to push her away from him. "And never look at him again."
Her eyes widen, her cheeks flushing. "O-Okay..." she whispers. "I won't... I promise."
She hugs him again, and this time, he notices the smallest gray speckle on one of her wings.
He must be tuning to his old human traits because it's not like him to make such a grave mistake.
~~
The truth is, as much as Bakugou can't stop thinking about Uraraka Ochako and worrying if she's keeping her promise. He also can't help but think about Midoriya Izuku. Who the hell is he? What makes him so great? What little he saw of him... Bakugou couldn't help but think he looked like a gosh darn nerd. Who the hell wants someone like that?
He wonders if they were on a date when she died; if Midoriya Izuku had been lucky enough to kiss her.
"Bakugou," she giggles softly, and flicks some water his way as they both sit in the grace pool. "You've got an angry look on your face," she says and leans forward, gently poking at his cheek. Her bare breast pushes against his arm and he practically jumps back.
He's not used to his body actually responding to things like this. Bakugou has never cared about being naked in the grace pool, not until soaking with her. He wonders if he can fall for just these perverse thoughts. He can't recall ever being so affected before, even in what little he knows of his human lifetime.
"OI! I'm forking relaxing!" he growls, trying to keep his eyes shut so he doesn't see anything.
"Are you?" she asks. "You have this awful face on right now." She presses her fingers against her own forehead, pushing her brow down. "Like this."
He snorts and flicks his wing towards her, splashing water onto her face and hair.
"H-Hey!" she pouts. "I just flicked some water at you. You dumped a wave on me!"
She flicks her wing at him, dumping a rush of water on him. He growls, opening his eyes to see her buried in the water completely, minus her head. She's smirking at him, as if she's a demon, not a beautiful angel.
"I'll kill you," he growls.
Her wings flutter in the water. "You can't. You're going to fall to hell if you keep threatening me with murder!" she teases.
He lunges forward, dumping water across her face. They're not supposed to play in the grace pools. They're holy places where they receive their angelic energy, but he cannot let her get away with this.
"I'll figure out some kind of punishment!" he snaps wrapping his arms around her waist as he lifts her up and dunks her into the water.
She laughs with a loud giggle and a splash. "This isn't fair!" she says, flicking her wings at him to send a wave his way.
He repeats the action, flicking his wings towards her, a giant rush of water engulfing her. "How’s it unfair?" he snorts, folding his arms over his chest.
"Because," she whines, wiping water down her face. "Your wings are bigger than mine!"
"Too bad," he chuckles, holding his hands up as she splashes at him again.
He recalls this might be what love is; his heart full, his desire to frown overridden by an incessant need to smile. When he looks at her, he wants to say it.
Instead he swallows them, not wanting to believe he actually has done the impossible and fallen in love.
~~
"You've been smiling a lot lately," Kirishima says, leaning over his cloud pool. "Even looking at humans, you don't look so darn annoyed all the time."
Bakugou rolls his eyes. "Whatever, I haven't had annoying humans lately."
"Really? I was gonna guess it was because of Uraraka," he smirks.
"Hah!?" Bakugou snorts, brushing his hand over his cloud pool. If he's not paying any attention to his human, might as well close it for now.
"Look man, you just seem happier with her around. She's a good friend to you," Kirishima says. "No need to get defensive."
Friend. Right.
"Mmm. It's whatever," he grumbles.
Kirishima frowns. "She's a nice girl, and good at this. It was like she was made to be a guardian."
"Yeah," Bakugou snorts, silently hoping she hasn't given Midoriya Izuku another thought. "I dunno, she might be too sensitive."
"I think she's just passionate."
That's for sure. She's passionate, kind, absolutely adorable.. determined, strong-willed... Bakugou could probably write an angel guidebook on how perfect Uraraka Ochako is.
"You know," Kirishima chuckles, raising his eyebrow. "There's no rule that says you can't love her."
Bakugou pales. "The fart Kirishima?!" he snorts.
"Did I guess correctly? I just kind of had a feeling. Though it's weird, we don't really... feel emotions like that, but it's not like you'll fall to hell because you love her. Just kinda stinks," he rambles.
"Stop it!" he snaps. "Stop talking! I don't love her, I don't love anyone!" he growls, and storms away from the obnoxious redhead. "Angels don't feel romantic love. Not in that way."
Except for some reason he does.
He loves Uraraka Ochako.
~~
He finds he and Uraraka enjoy spending time on the edge of the clouds in their free time. It sort of has become their spot, unofficially of course. But he finds her there often, thinking about whatever is on her mind.
Sometime they talk about their humans, shallow conversation which is good for her mind.
"I like making them happy," she says softly. "It’s really rewarding to see them smile, after watching them be so sad for so long. I want to believe… we’re really helping."
Funny. He feels rewarded when she smiles too.
"You are helping, Cheeks."
She’s silent for a moment. She looks sadder when they sit there, but he understands she's processing this new life. Or afterlife, rather.
He wants to reassure her or tell her it'll be okay, but he's never been great with words. She makes him want to try though.
"Do you ever look at them later on? I mean… is that allowed?" she asks, clutching her hands to her chest. "Maybe I’m being too sentimental, but I like the idea of checking up on Shinsou and seeing how he’s doing later on."
Bakugou snorts. "You are too sentimental." He rolls his eyes. "There’s nothing that says you can’t do that. You just can’t get obsessed or fall in love." He probably shouldn’t encourage her to check in, that’s what leads to bad behavior and she’s already on thin ice with remembering Midoriya Izuku’s name.
"I-I guess I am," she mutters, pursing her lips. Fart. He doesn’t like when she looks so sad.
He’s weak to her.
"Look I won’t tell you not to check in here and there. Just don’t do it every gosh darn day!"
Her eyes light up and his chest feels tight.
"No I mean, once every few years or so."
"Don’t tell Toshi I said it was fine, or I’ll kill you!" he snaps, glancing away from her. He needs a break from looking at her face or his heart might explode.
She giggles. "Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me."
There’s more silence, but Bakugou doesn’t mind. Just sitting with her and being with her is enough for him.
"Bakugou," she suddenly speaks. "Do you really... not remember anything from your time as a human?"
He sighs, his lips parting. His wings flutters a bit, and his eyes fall to the small gray spec, still on her upper right wing. He hates that it's there, proof he couldn't protect her fully.
"I-I promise I haven't looked at him again, I just... was curious."
"My mother," Bakugou mutters softly.
"Your mother?" she asks.
"Bakugou Mitsuki. That was her name."
"And you never once looked at her?"
"No," Bakugou shakes his head. "I'm sure she's long dead. Probably in hell, darn hag."
"B-Bakugou! That's a terrible thing to say about your mother. B-But I mean when you remembered... you never... checked?"
"Nah..." he shrugs. "I figured she was probably fine."
Uraraka reaches forward and gently touches his leg. Her fingers are so thin and gentle, the touch filled with as much compassion as she houses in her small body. "You're so strong, Bakugou," she mutters. "I wish as I was as strong as you."
He doesn't like how she says that.
~~
It's inevitable, that he catches her again. It was only a matter of time and he knows that. The temptation is too strong for her.
He knows immediately, the look on her face when he rounds the corner says it all. She freezes, her brown eyes wide it looks like she wants to sink into her cloud.
"Uraraka," he growls, and steps onto the cloud. Midoriya Izuku is in the image, sitting at a cafe with a boy with dark blue hair and glasses.
"It was just a second I-" she gasps and suddenly clutches her chest. The gray splotch on her wing darkens, one feather turning completely black as it breaks off and gently flutters over her shoulder and lands in her palm. "I-I'm sorry..." she whispers. "I'm not as strong as you."
He lunges forward and grabs her shoulders. "You are as strong as me!" he snarls. "You're forkin' strong as hell!"
He wishes he could take back his phrasing.
"We were friends..." she says softly. He flicks his gaze to her wings, another two or three turning gray.
"Stop..." he growls.
"I saved him... I... I gave up my life so he could live and I-"
"STOP!" He growls. "You need to see Toshi now."
More gray. He's losing count. Another black, they fall against the cloud she's standing on, tears rolling down her cheeks.
Why the hell did she remember? Why!? Was her love for Midoriya Izuku so strong? His grip on her shoulders tighten.
"The memories keep coming back, Katsuki," she says, his first name sounding bittersweet in this moment. "I can't stop them."
"Stop talking. Just stop."
"I'm sorry," she whispers, her knees trembling.
He grabs her before she can collapse, and he carries her. It's rare he uses his wings, but he takes off, zooming towards the castle. This is his fault. He should've erased her mind when she first remembered Midoriya Izuku, that darn nerd.
He's ruined her eternity.
He's ruined their eternity.
Bakugou hates him. Almost as much as he hates himself.
He slams the door open to Toshi's office and the large blond man stands up, pressing his hand against his desk. "What is this-"
"Erase her memories. Right now," Bakugou demands, holding her close to his chest.
"What happened?!" he asks, looking concerned.
"She remembered the boy she saved and it spiraled out of control when she looked at him," Bakugou says, omitting the part where she remembered months ago.
"Did she give him her grace?" Toshi asks.
Uraraka turns her face to Bakugou's chest, and he clings to her hard. No wonder Midoriya Izuku looked so gosh darn happy. "I-I'm sorry," she squeaks.
Toshi lets out a long sigh. "Take her to the grace pool. If the waters accept her, we can erase her memory-"
"But-!"
"Bakugou... you know there is nothing else I can do," Toshi says, shaking his head.
"DARNIT!" he yells, another moment when an actual profanity would feel more appropriate.
He storms towards the back of the castle, still carrying her in his arms. "I'm sorry," she whispers. "I know you've done so much for me... I'm such an idiot."
"Humans do crappy things when they're in love," he says.
"What?" she whispers, but he doesn't answer. He doesn't want to hear about how she felt about him, and how remembering her love for him made her give him her grace so she could make certain he was happy...
Kicking open the door, he gently settles her down on the floor next to the pool. She takes a deep breath and pushes herself up, another few black feathers falling to the ground. Her fingers trembled as she unties the knot tied around her waist, the golden ropes slowly falling to the ground. Her white robes slip off of her, her wings looking barer than before, not as full.
He could see her foot hover over the water, ready to take a step into the pool, and he fights against his urge to stop her, knowing as another black feather falls to the ground, the grace isn't going to accept her.
It’s his fault.
She’s going to suffer in hell because he didn't erase her memory immediately.
What a fool he was.
She steps into the pool, walking towards the center as she had the day she got her wings. She shuts her eyes and waits.
It’s then he sees them, ripples of snakes skirting across the water. Dark trails begin to surround her, wrapping around her body. She immediately turns to face him, dark lines curling around her neck as the water turns pitch black and begins to smoke.
"Ochako!" he cries out, rushing to the edge, but stops at the murky water.
"K-Katsuki!" she chokes, reaching for him as her arms are pulled back.
Black tendrils of water pull at her arms, and yank her neck back, her chest, naked and exposed towards the ceiling. Her body begins to glow golden as the remaining grace slips from her, a scream erupting from her lips. A whirlpool swirls around her body, the white of her wings turning black as they litter the water as they fall from her body. The pool gushes around her, a vortex opening in the middle as she’s pulled by the tendrils around her neck and wrists down into the water.
And as Uraraka Ochako begins to fall to hell, her grace and wings completely gone, Bakugou Katsuki shoots into the air and dives right into the hole after her.
He really is a fool.
But then again, humans do crappy things when they're in love.
~~
Bakugou Katsuki had planned to go to University. He worked damn hard for his scholarship, wanting to be the best fucking soccer player there was at the school. Eventually he would go pro...
Hell, maybe he'd even go pro before school finished. Some scout would show up, and they'd want to sign him right away and to hell with school, that was way more important.
His parents would be able to retire in luxury, he could live in a classy penthouse and do whatever he pleased.
Hell yes, Bakugou Katsuki was going to have the most perfect goddamn life.
Until he died.
He fought with his old hag often, but it was just because their personalities were practically the same. He didn't hate the woman, contrary to popular belief. But moving into his dorm was a fucking pain in the ass, especially when he kept trying to put things how he wanted them and then his mother would move them.
"Look Katsuki, you're not listening-"
"Shut the fuck up, hag! Stop moving my shit!"
He cursed her that day so many times, over the pettiest shit.
"How about we go get some food and come back to this," Bakugou Masaru pleaded with his family. Always trying to calm the other two explosive Bakugous down.
"Fine. I'm fuckin' starving anyway," Bakugou said, slinging the jacket over his shoulder.
"There was a nice Italian place across the street, how does that sound?" Masaru asked.
"Whatever," Bakugou huffed, letting his parents lead the way. It didn't really matter where they ate. Soon, he'd be all moved in and his parents would leave and then, boom. He'd be all on his own, not having to deal with his parents.
"Let's go, Katsuki," his mother sighed, following Masaru.
It probably would've been okay if they hadn't been fighting. Maybe his mother would never have stopped in the crosswalk to turn around and yell at him for being so damn slow. The crossing light hadn't changed, but some truck didn't realize, unprepared to stop as it came up over the steep hill.
Bakugou didn't remember anything except screaming at his hag to watch out. By some miracle, his hands had connected with her, pushing her out of the way when moments later the truck directly connected with his body.
~~
Bakugou groans, his face feeling hot against the ground. It feels like the truck hit him all over again, his body bruised and damaged though that wasn't actually possible.
Where the hell is he?
Oh. Right. Hell.
Uraraka fell... and he jumped in the vortex after her. It was one thing to take a trip to hell, it was another to go through a demon vortex. No wonder he has his goddamn memories back.
"Shit..."
And can swear apparently.
He pushes himself up, trying not to think about the image of his mother's face playing on repeat in his brain. Bakugou Mitsuki. He always was curious why he remembered her name.
Maybe that's why he connected with Uraraka so much; because their deaths had been oddly similar. He supposes not as much time has passed with him being in heaven either. Why did it felt like he'd been there for an eternity? So much time passed on Earth and he supposes he lost track.
He wrinkles his nose, forgetting how sulfuric hell smells, like acid seeping into his clothes and skin. It's hot and his body trembles. His wings are still white, so he guesses he still has his grace, despite having fallen through the vortex. Shocking, but he's not complaining.
He has to find her.
He doesn't have much of a plan, but he'll come up with some sort of deal before he makes it to the center. Demons love fuckin' deals.
He wonders why the vortex put him so far away. Wouldn't he have fallen in the same place as Uraraka?! Then again, he is an angel, so maybe it spat him out closer to the entrance.
The walk down into hell isn't pleasant. The air gets hotter and heavier the deeper he goes and he sees various creatures lining the walls, sneering at him and laughing. "Two fallen angels today!? How lucky for the king!"
Todoroki Shouto, the King of Hell awaits Bakugou at the center, and he prays the idiot will be more forgiving than his father. He'd only met Todoroki Shouto once, when he stood by his father's side quietly when Toshi and Bakugou had come to rescue Kaminari. Back then, hell had been extremely unforgiving; hot fire burned across the floor and the entire place felt like pressure closing in.
Bakugou has no idea what awaits him now.
Technically, Todoroki is half angel, but he chose to take over as the King of Hell, overthrowing his father. Something had happened with a human girl, who now ruled with him as the Queen of Hell. Bakugou didn't care, but he almost wished he knew more, if only to make a better deal.
Maybe they would be more sympathetic when they realized how pathetically in love he is with Uraraka.
Could demons even be sympathetic?
He pants as he stops at the entrance to the center of hell where a large cage sits. A few black feathers lie around Uraraka, her body heaving as she sits on the floor of the cave, clutching her hands to her chest.
"Ochako!" he calls out and her head turns to face him.
"Katsuki! No!"
He freezes in place when he realizes her eyes are pitch black, small horns poking out of her forehead. The closer he gets he notices the thin tail wrapped around her legs, her nails long, like sharpened claws.
She's already begun to turn into a demon.
With a snap and puff of red smoke, Todoroki Shouto and his queen stand in front of the cage, blocking Bakugou from seeing her. Todoroki looks no different than Bakugou remembers, a long red suit with his intense scar on his face, though his hair is slicked back. His woman stands tall next to him, her arm draped over his shoulder. Her long, dark black hair cascades down her back and the red dress she is wearing leaves little to his imagination, the slit on the side going to her upper leg. She too has horns which curl around the sides of her head and a long thin tail which wraps down the length of her body.
"Angel," Todoroki says. "Bakugou Katsuki. It's been awhile. I don't know if you ever met my queen, Todoroki Momo."
"Shut up, devil," he hisses. "Give me back the girl."
"Her?" Todoroki blinks, looking back at Uraraka, her body heaving as the horns stretch over the back of her head. "I doubt heaven would take her back at this point. What did she do to fall so hard?"
"It's my fault," Bakugou growls. "Give her back. I’ll fix this it." He doesn’t know if he can.
"You know I'm not the one who takes fallen angels," he says, shaking his head. "Heaven spits them down here when it deems them unworthy."
"Heaven is far more intense than we are," Momo says. "We can take good care of her once her transformation is complete."
Bakugou clicks his tongue. "Shut up, devils!" he snarls. "You're both fucking liars. I know you torture the souls that come here."
Todoroki frowns. "I am not my father. Only souls that deserve to be tortured are given that treatment."
"And yet you've put her in a cage and changed her into a demon?"
"She's only in the cage so none of the other demons try and attack her. Her turning has nothing to do with us. It's the loss of grace. Without it, a soul is corrupted and becomes like this. I never received grace, but Shouto still has some of his," Momo explains.
"...What?" Bakugou snaps.
"I'm not my father," Todoroki repeats. "I don't wish to harm her, or you for that matter. However, I cannot give her back to you. If you bring her back to heaven, it will kill her."
He takes a deep breath, glancing at Uraraka's changing form. He's done this to her, made her into a demon. If he had only told Toshi earlier, they could've stopped and they could've been together in heaven... she could've been happy.
She could still be happy and not trapped in hell, forced to be a demon for all eternity.
"You love her?" Momo asks, glancing at both of them.
Bakugou can't help but clench his fists, staring at the cage. "I do..." He sucks in a deep breath, knowing she doesn't feel the same. He's not Midoriya Izuku, the boy she died for. "I... I want to give her my grace. Her soul for mine. A fucking equal trade off."
Todoroki blinks and speaks bluntly. "You'll have to stay here."
"I fuckin' know that! Make the deal or don't make the deal!"
"I'll make the deal. If you are certain," he says and steps towards Bakugou, placing his hand over his chest.
Bakugou has never been particularly attached to heaven. He likes it enough, it was a good place to be for the rest of eternity. But he thinks about how satisfied Uraraka looks when she's helping people, her determination, her passion.
Someone like her doesn't belong in hell.
"I’ve never been more certain of anything," he growls, shutting his eyes.
The pain is excruciating, his grace being ripped from his body. His chest trembles and his arms and legs feel weak, the golden ball of energy pulsing at his chest against Todoroki's hand. He cries out, falling to his knees as the golden glow swirls out of him, escaping his body into the orb Todoroki holds in his palm.
He pants, clutching his chest, the dark energy rushing into his body. His soul can't handle being in the center of hell and he cries out as darkness washes over his eyes and horns burst from his forehead, curling up and out. He grits his teeth, a long tail pushing out of him and wrapping around his body, the dark energy pulsing in his chest. It feels heavy, like chaos is swirling inside of him. The reds of his eyes return, the black dissipating as he settles into the demon form, his body twisting with hot pain.
With a snap of her fingers, Momo lets Uraraka out of the cage, placing it around Bakugou instead.
He watches as Momo leans down and scoops Uraraka into her arms, Todoroki pressing Bakugou's grace into her chest.
At least a part of him will always be with her.
With a shudder, her body lurches up, the horns and tail disappearing, her claws sinking back into her fingers. She looks normal, just as when he saw her for the first time, standing in the stark white entry room.
She's panting as Momo puts her down and helps her stand up. She glances at Momo and Todoroki, before turning to the cage. "Where... Katsuki!" she gasps and rushes towards him, immediately cupping his cheeks through the bars of the cage. "What happened?! What did you do?!"
"I made a deal with the devil," he grumbles.
"What?! No! You're an idiot!" she snaps.
"Yup," he snorts. "I gave you my grace. So you better not fucking lose it this time. Don't be looking at that nerd all the damn time!"
"Why... why would you do that!?" she says, stroking her thumbs over his cheeks. "This was my fault-"
"No. It was mine," he growls, and reaches up to squeeze her fingers between his own. "I should never have let you keep your memories."
Tears glisten in her eyes. "But... it was my fault, for wanting to look."
"I told you, idiot. Humans do stupid things for the people they love."
She stares at him, tears rolling down her cheeks. He hates how she looks when she cries, her cheeks getting all blotchy and red. "C'mon Cheeks, there's no need to fuckin' cry about it. Besides I can swear down here and shit."
"It's not heaven if you're not there..." she whispers and his heart clenches in his chest. Fuck. He loves her so much. He doesn't want to let her go. He's glad there's a cage between them so he can't steal her into his arms and hold her there for eternity with him.
"Ochako-"
"No. I... I don't love Izuku..." she says quietly. "He was my best friend but I didn't love him... not like the way you think..." Her voice grows louder, tears falling in streams. "I wanted to see how he was because I realized I'd saved him and I hated that he was sad because of me... that's why I gave him my grace, not because I loved him," she breathes, sucking in a long breath of air. "How can I go back to heaven if you're not there!?!"
What?
She didn't love him.
"I'm falling in love with you. The reason I was so happy in heaven is because you were there. You were teaching me and I got to smile with you. I know angels don't really feel love but I..." she continues, tears falling down. "I want to be with you. I don't care if it means staying here. I don't want to go back without you."
He can't let her finish speaking. Grabbing her perfect cheeks, he kisses her through the bars, slamming their lips together.
"Fuck it..." he whispers, after fighting for so damn long, he no longer can. "Stay with me then. I love you so damn much, Ochako."
"Y-You do? I figured I was... too new... too human still..." She breathes out, staring at his lips.
"You're a fuckin' miracle I guess, getting me to feel shit again," he smirks, pecking her lips.
She turns around to Todoroki. "Can you... take my grace away?"
"Eh?" Todoroki blinks. "Take it away?"
"I want to stay here," she says. "Uhm... if that's okay?"
Momo raises her eyebrow and snaps her fingers, the cage disappearing.
Rushing forward, Uraraka wraps her hands around Bakugou's, staring at the other two. "Please. I want to be with him."
Todoroki sighs and twists his lips. "You realize that will make you a demon again? The two of you will be trapped here, though you will have the same freedoms as other demons. Listen to our rules and we won't have any problems. As I have mentioned, I am not my father and I want for us to create a different realm here in hell."
"Then... we can help with that!" Uraraka smiles, standing up straight. "Please... take my grace. I want to stay in hell."
"I think this is the first time this has ever happened," Momo giggles softly, her long tail swishing back and forth.
"Mmm. Second. I seem to recall someone else asking me to stay in hell," Todoroki smirks, pressing a kiss to Momo's cheek.
"True," she hums. "It's not so bad here."
Bakugou doesn't want to let go of Uraraka's hand, he never wants to let her go, but she steps forward away from him as Todoroki places his hand on her chest. The golden orb rushes forward, pulling out from her and she cries out, her head falling back. The glow of the grace leaves her body, the darkness rushing into her as it did Bakugou.
Again, her eyes turn black, horns sprouting from her forehead as they trail back over her head. Her nails lengthen into claws and a thin long tail sprouts from behind her.
Falling to her knees, Bakugou rushes to her side, supporting her with his hands as she pants heavily. "I-I'm glad I get to stay."
Todoroki nods. "We'll give you a moment... we need to lock this grace away for safekeeping. In the wrong hands, it could be dangerous."
With the king and queen leaving them, for a moment, it feels like they're alone in the hot cave of hell. Alone in the worst place of all the realms, and nothing has ever felt more perfect. At least not to Bakugou.
Even in her demon form, Uraraka Ochako is beautiful. An angel, in her own right. The horns curl over her head, her brown eyes wide and full of joy, not a fleck of sadness in them. He loves her, the emotion overpowering all others in his chest.
He presses their lips together again. It doesn't feel weird to kiss her, to be close to her, as if this is what he's been waiting for his entire existence. Her. His demon princess.
"I love you," she giggles, whispering softly against his lips.
"I love you too, Cheeks," he smirks, brushing his hand over the small of her bare back.
They have all eternity to say it, and Bakugou has a feeling it's never going to get old.
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